Family Guy Episode Scripts
Season 1
1. Death Has a Shadow2. I Never Met the Dead Man
3. Chitty Chitty Death Bang
4. Mind Over Murder
5. A Hero Sits Next Door
6. The Son Also Draws
7. Brian: Portrait of a Dog
Season 2
1. Peter, Peter, Caviar Eater2. Holy Crap
3. DaBoom
4. Brian in Love
5. Love Thy Trophy
6. Death Is a Bitch
7. The King Is Dead
8. I Am Peter, Hear Me Roar
9. If I'm Dyin' I'm Lyin'
10. Running Mates
11. A Picture Is Worth 1,000 Bucks
12. Fifteen Minutes of Shame
13. Road to Rhode Island
14. Let's Go to the Hop
15. Dammit Janet
16. There's Something About Paulie
17. He's Too Sexy for His Fat
18. E. Peterbus Unum
19. The Story on Page One
20. Wasted Talent
21. Fore, Father
Season 3
1. The Thin White Line (1)2. Brian Does Hollywood (2)
3. Mr. Griffin Goes to Washington
4. One If By Clam, Two If By Sea
5. And the Wiener is...
6. Death Lives
7. Lethal Weapons
8. The Kiss Seen Around the World
9. Mr. Saturday Knight
10. Fish Out of Water
11. Emission Impossible
12. To Live and Die in Dixie
13. Screwed the Pooch
14. Peter Griffin: Husband, Father...Brother?
15. Ready, Willing, and Disabled
16. A Very Special Family Guy Freakin' Christmas
17. Brian Wallows and Peter's Swallows
18. From Method to Madness
19. Stuck Together, Torn Apart
20. Road to Europe
21. Family Guy Viewer Mail (1)
22. When You Wish Upon a Weinstein
Season 4
1. North by North Quahog2. Fast Times at Buddy Cianci Jr. High
3. Blind Ambition
4. Don't Make Me Over
5. The Cleveland-Loretta Quagmire
6. Petarded
7. Brian the Bachelor
8. 8 Simple Rules for Buying My Teenage Daughter
9. Breaking Out Is Hard to Do
10. Model Misbehavior
11. Peter's Got Woods
12. Perfect Castaway
13. Jungle Love
14. PTV
15. Brian Goes Back to College
16. The Courtship of Stewie's Father
17. The Fat Guy Strangler
18. The Father, The Son and the Holy Fonz
19. Brian Sings and Swings
20. Patriot Games
21. I Take Thee, Quagmire
22. Sibling Rivalry
23. Deep Throats
24. Peterotica
25. You May Kiss The...Uh...Guy Who Receives
26. Petergeist
27. Untitled Griffin Family History
Season 5
1. Stewie Loves Lois2. Mother Tucker
3. Hell Comes to Quahog
4. Saving Private Brian
5. Whistle While Your Wife Works
6. Prick Up Your Ears
7. Chick Cancer
8. Barely Legal
9. Road to Rupert
10. Peter's Two Dads
11. The Tan Aquatic with Steve Zissou
12. Airport '07
13. Bill and Peter's Bogus Adventure
14. No Meals on Wheels
15. Boys Do Cry
16. No Chris Left Behind
17. It Takes a Village Idiot, and I Married One
18. Meet the Quagmires
Season 6
1. Blue Harvest2. Movin' Out
3. Believe It or Not, Joe's Walking on Air
4. Stewie Kills Lois (1)
5. Lois Kills Stewie (2)
6. Padre de Familia
7. Peter's Daughter
8. McStroke
9. Back to the Woods
10. Play it Again, Brian
11. The Former Life of Brian
12. Long John Peter
Season 7
1. Love Blactually2. I Dream of Jesus
3. Road to Germany
4. Baby Not on Board
5. The Man with Two Brians
6. Tales of a Third Grade Nothing
7. Ocean's Three and a Half
8. Family Gay
9. The Juice Is Loose!
10. FOX-y Lady
11. Not All Dogs Go to Heaven
12. 420
13. Stew-Roids
14. We Love You Conrad
15. Three Kings
16. Peter's Progress
Season 8
1. Road to the Multiverse2. Family Goy
3. Spies Reminiscent of Us
4. Brian's Got a Brand New Bag
5. Hannah Banana
6. Quagmire's Baby
7. Jerome Is the New Black
8. Dog Gone
9. Business Guy
10. Big Man on Hippocampus
11. Dial Meg for Murder
12. Extra Large Medium
13. Go, Stewie, Go!
14. Peter-assment
15. Brian Griffin's House of Payne
16. April in Quahog
17. Brian & Stewie
18. Quagmire's Dad
19. The Splendid Source
20. Something, Something, Something, Dark Side
21. Partial Terms of Endearment
Season 9
1. And Then There Were Fewer2. Excellence in Broadcasting
3. Welcome Back, Carter
4. Halloween on Spooner Street
5. Baby, You Knock Me Out
6. Brian Writes a Bestseller
7. Road to the North Pole
8. New Kidney in Town
9. And I'm Joyce Kinney
10. Friends of Peter G
11. German Guy
12. The Hand That Rocks the Wheelchair
13. Trading Places
14. Tiegs for Two
15. Brothers & Sisters
16. The Big Bang Theory
17. Foreign Affairs
18. It's a Trap!
Season 10
1. Lottery Fever2. Seahorse Seashell Party (2)
3. Screams of Silence: The Story of Brenda Q
4. Stewie Goes for a Drive
5. Back to the Pilot
6. Thanksgiving
7. Amish Guy
8. Cool Hand Peter
9. Grumpy Old Man
10. Quagmire & Meg
11. The Blind Side
12. Livin' on a Prayer
13. Tom Tucker: The Man and His Dream
14. Be Careful What You Fish For
15. Burning Down the Bayit
16. Killer Queen
17. Forget-Me-Not
18. You Can't Do That on Television, Peter
19. Mr. and Mrs. Stewie
20. Leggo My Meg-O
21. Tea Peter
22. Family Guy Viewer Mail (2)
23. Internal Affairs
Season 11
1. Into Fat Air2. Ratings Guy
3. The Old Man & the Big 'C'
4. Yug Ylimaf
5. Joe's Revenge
6. Lois Comes Out of Her Shell
7. Friends Without Benefits
8. Jesus, Mary & Joseph
9. Space Cadet
10. Brian's Play
11. The Giggity Wife
12. Valentine's Day in Quahog
13. Chris Cross
14. Call Girl
15. Turban Cowboy
16. 12 and a Half Angry Men
17. Bigfat
18. Total Recall
19. Save the Clam
20. Farmer Guy
21. Road to Vegas
22. No Country Club for Old Men
Season 12
1. Finders Keepers2. Vestigial Peter
3. Quagmire's Quagmire
4. A Fistful of Meg
5. Boopa-dee Bappa-dee
6. Life of Brian
7. Into Harmony's Way
8. Christmas Guy
9. Peter Problems
10. Grimm Job
11. Brian's a Bad Father
12. Mom's the Word
13. 3 Acts of God
14. Fresh Heir
15. Secondhand Spoke
16. Herpe the Love Sore
17. The Most Interesting Man in the World
18. Baby Got Black
19. Meg Stinks!
20. He's Bla-ack!
21. Chap Stewie
Season 13
1. The Simpsons Guy2. The Book of Joe
3. Baking Bad
4. Brian the Closer
5. Turkey Guys
6. The 2000-Year-Old Virgin
7. Stewie, Chris & Brian's Excellent Adventure
8. Our Idiot Brian
9. This Little Piggy
10. Quagmire's Mom
11. Encyclopedia Griffin
12. Stewie Is Enceinte
13. Dr. C and the Women
14. #JOLO
15. Once Bitten
16. Roasted Guy
17. Fighting Irish
18. Take My Wife
Season 14
1. Pilling Them Softly2. Papa Has a Rollin' Son
3. Guy, Robot
4. Peternormal Activity
5. Peter, Chris, & Brian
6. Peter's Sister
7. Hot Pocket-Dial
8. Brokeback Swanson
9. A Shot in the Dark
10. Candy, Quahog Marshmallow
11. The Peanut Butter Kid
12. Scammed Yankees
13. An App a Day
14. Underage Peter
15. A Lot Going on Upstairs
16. The Heartbreak Dog
17. Take a Letter
18. The New Adventures of Old Tom
19. Run, Chris, Run
20. Road to India
Season 15
1. The Boys in the Band2. Bookie of the Year
3. American Gigg-olo
4. Inside Family Guy
5. Chris Has Got a Date, Date, Date, Date, Date
6. Hot Shots
7. High School English
8. Carter and Tricia
9. How the Griffin Stole Christmas
10. Passenger Fatty-Seven
11. Gronkowsbees
12. Peter's Def Jam
13. The Finer Strings
14. The Dating Game
15. Cop and a Half-wit
16. Saturated Fat Guy
17. Peter's Lost Youth
18. The Peter Principal
19. Dearly Deported
20. A House Full of Peters
Season 16
1. Emmy-Winning Episode2. Foxx in the Men House
3. Nanny Goats
4. Follow the Money
5. Three Directors
6. The D in Apartment 23
7. Petey IV
8. Crimes and Meg's Demeanor
9. Don't Be a Dickens at Christmas
10. Boy (Dog) Meets Girl (Dog)
11. Dog Bites Bear
12. Send in Stewie, Please
13. V Is For Mystery
14. Veteran Guy
15. The Woof of Wall Street
16. Family Guy' Through the Years
17. Switch the Flip
18. HTTPete
19. The Unkindest Cut
20. Are You There God? It's Me, Peter
Season 17
1. Married... With Cancer2. Dead Dog Walking
3. Pal Stewie
4. Big Trouble in Little Quahog
5. Regarding Carter
6. Stand by Meg
7. The Griffin Winter Games
8. Con Heiress
9. Pawtucket Pete
10. Hefty Shades of Gray
11. Trump Guy
12. Bri, Robot
13. Trans-Fat
14. Family Guy Lite
15. No Giggity, No Doubt
16. You Can't Handle the Booth
17. Island Adventure
18. Throw It Away
19. Girl, Internetted
20. Adam West High
Season 18
1. Yacht Rocky2. Bri-Da
3. Absolutely Babulous
4. Disney's The Reboot
5. Cat Fight
6. Peter & Lois' Wedding
7. Heart Burn
8. Shanksgiving
9. Christmas is Coming
10. Connie's Celica
11. Short Cuts
12. Undergrounded
13. Rich Old Stewie
14. The Movement
15. Baby Stewie
16. Start Me Up
17. Coma Guy
18. Better Off Meg
19. Holly Bibble
20. Movin' In (Principal Shepherd's Song)
Season 19
1. Stewie's First Word2. The Talented Mr. Stewie
3. Boys & Squirrels
4. CutawayLand
5. La Famiglia Guy
6. Meg's Wedding
7. Wild Wild West
8. Pawtucket Pat
9. The First No L
10. Fecal Matters
11. Boy's Best Friend
12. And Then There's Fraud
13. PeTerminator
14. The Marrying Kind
15. Customer of the Week
16. Who's Brian Now?
17. Young Parent Trap
18. Meg Goes to College
19. Family Cat
20. Tales of Former Sports Glory
Season 20
1. LASIK Instinct2. Rock Hard
3. Must Love Dogs
4. 80's Guy
5. Brief Encounter
6. Cootie & The Blowhard
7. Peterschmidt Manor
8. The Birthday Bootlegger
9. The Fatman Always Rings Twice
10. Christmas Crime
11. Mister Act
12. The Lois Quagmire
13. Lawyer Guy
14. HBO-No
15. Hard Boiled Meg
16. Prescription Heroine
17. All About Alana
18. Girlfriend, Eh?
19. First Blood
20. Jersey Bore
Season 21
1. Oscars Guy2. Bend or Blockbuster
3. A Wife-Changing Experience
4. The Munchurian Candidate
5. Unzipped Code
6. Happy Holo-ween
7. The Stewaway
8. Get Stewie
9. Carny Knowledge
10. The Candidate
11. Love Story Guy
12. Old West
13. Single White Dad
14. White Meg Can't Jump
15. Adoptation
16. The Bird Reich
17. A Bottle Episode
18. Vat Man and Rob 'Em
19. From Russia With Love
20. Adult Education
Season 22
1. Fertilized Megg2. Supermarket Pete
3. A Stache From the Past
4. Old World Harm
5. Baby, It's Cold Inside
6. Boston Stewie
7. Snap(ple) Decision
8. Baking Sad
9. The Return of the King (of Queens)
10. Cabin Pressure
11. Teacher's Heavy Pet
12. Take This Job and Love It
13. Lifeguard Meg
14. Fat Actor
15. Faith No More