Alaye (2024) Movie Script
1
Hello...
Catherine... sorry for your loss.
Thank you.
When am I getting my money?
Ah... Gabby, you know that...
I will pay you. It's just
that I'm still mourning.
What's my business
with your mourning, Catherine?
Did I kill your father?
If you take a loan from the bank,
will you say you're mourning
when it's time to pay back?
An agreement is an agreement.
I've given you the money, pay me back.
You want Ogun to kill you?
I don't care if you lose your family.
But I still sympathize with you.
You are supposed to keep
your side of the bargain and pay my money.
I will pay in...
- in... two...
- Catherine, two days!
Okay. Yes, two days.
If you don't pay my money in two days,
I'll destroy your face with this knife.
I'll tear your face!
You won't recognize yourself.
Don't joke with me.
Get out.
Catherine. How many days did I tell you?
- Two days.
- Warn yourself.
Next!
Good evening, Mr. Gabby.
I want a loan of 500,000
that I will pay in two months.
Babe, you know I invested
my money into everything.
- Wow.
- And business is kind of slow.
I know.
Just that I have two days.
Two days to come up with the money
and I don't know where to go.
Six million, is no joke.
Right?
Have you called Ben?
Ben?
Ben never has money.
Of what use is that guy to you anyway?
That guy is just useless as it is.
When you need him the most,
he's not even there.
What can you sell?
How do you mean what can I sell?
I have sold everything
because of this situation. You know.
I asked my mechanic
to find me a buyer for the car.
The only thing I have is this house.
My father's legacy. I can't sell it.
I can't. If I try it,
just know that I have failed in life.
I have an idea.
What if...
we get you a flatmate. I mean,
someone to share the house with you.
That will bring some money, right?
And put Gabby off you for some time.
It's not a bad idea.
I'm just saying that
it's going to take time.
I need quick cash. Quick!
Okay.
My cousin, Funmi,
wants to leave the country.
Looking for a place to stay
in Lagos till the visa is processed.
A full year's rent will be paid.
But he will only stay for six months.
If you're cool with that,
I can put a call through.
And you get your money.
You're not playing with me now, are you?
No.
- Just like that?
- Just like that.
What are we waiting for?
I mean, put the call through.
Eh, I know you,
you like your space and privacy.
It seems you don't understand
what I'm dealing with.
Is there space and privacy in the grave?
Gabby threatened to kill me.
Please, make the call.
Okay. I will put the call through then.
- Catherine!
- Boss, please, ah!
Are you mad?!
Please, don't be annoyed.
That's all I could come up with.
That's what I sent to you.
Just give me time, I will pay.
I will come up with the balance.
Catherine, I swear to God.
If I don't get my money, Catherine...
You will look for tears
and you won't see any.
Don't misbehave.
Remove this phone from ear.
Where will I get 4.8 million naira
to pay Gabby in two months?
Ah, God. I need a miracle.
Hey!
Eve. My love, I'm so sorry.
I got the alert.
The moment I got it,
I transferred it to Gabby.
I didn't have time to confirm. I got it.
Thank you so much. I don't know
what I'd have done without you.
I understand. It's fine.
By the way,
Funmi is coming over this evening.
I thought I should inform you.
Okay, great. I will just
put the room in order.
Thank you so much. God will bless you.
Thank you, thank you so much.
Anything for you, darling.
Okay.
Hello, what's up?
Sorry...
- who are you?
- Who am I?
How do you mean who am I?
Weren't you told I was coming?
Okay, for a proper introduction...
my name is Funmilade Fadegera Oguntanmu.
- Do you understand?
- Sorry.
- I was expecting a Funmilayo.
- Funmilayo?
How do you mean Funmilayo?
No, it's Ransom Kuti.
I am... look here, leave the way
let me enter, I'm your new neighbour.
- Excuse me?
- Get out of the way!
Can't you see I'm carrying bags?
What's wrong with you?
Ah-ah! Wow!
Hey! Don't touch anything!
Why?
Ah!
- What?! Floral...
- Hey!
Don't touch any... I'm not playing with you.
Ah-ah.
This is serious. Come to my aid.
Why is she being hostile
to me on my first day?
Hello? Eve.
Tell me that tout,
who just moved into my house
is not the Funmi
you've been talking about.
- He's there already?
- He?
Did you just say he?
I'm supposed to share my...
You told me a Funmi was coming.
I thought you meant Funmilayo.
Catherine, I don't have
a cousin named Funmilayo.
It's Funmilade.
Girl. You expect me
to share my house with a guy!
An agbero for that matter.
My cousin is not an agbero.
Oh. Wow. Tell me about it.
I will not share my house
with a guy. Least of all, a tout.
You know what? Just sort yourselves out.
You guys are both adults, okay?
Do what you think is right.
Fine!
Oh. Ah, dear Lord.
- Em, Mr... Funmilade, right?
- Yes.
I don't appreciate people
putting their legs on my table
so get it off.
You don't appreciate? Then you depreciate.
Hold on, I don't understand you.
Should I take my legs off the table?
What did you bring to the table?
Since I got here, have you asked
if I will eat or drink some juice?
- Is that the right way to behave?
- Just stop.
This is not going to work.
It's not possible.
So please, just get your things,
get yourself, and leave my house.
- I should leave?
- Yes!
Hold on, do you know 50 leaves notebook?
Eh?
Listen, this whole thing,
was one being misunderstanding.
And I promise you,
I'll sort it out with Eve.
I just need you to leave.
We can't share the same roof. Please.
- Okay. Should I leave your house?
- Yes!
You should have said that.
You don't need to tell these stories.
You should've summarized it.
- I should leave your house?
- Yes!
It's simple. You should have told me.
Make sure you don't miss me when I'm gone.
Hey.
Thank you.
Alright.
What does this mean? Where is my money?
Did I come here for free?
Didn't I pay you?
You don't want to pay me back?
- You want to dupe me?
- That's what I'm saying.
Listen, I'll give you your money.
I just don't have it.
Just give me time. Time to sort it out.
- Okay, you don't have it?
- Yes.
- You need time to sort it out?
- Yes.
No problem. Take your time.
I will use the time you need
to sort it out, to sort out my room.
Do you understand?
I need to relax and feel at home.
Should I sleep under the bridge
after paying for an apartment?
Listen to yourself.
Have it. Help me take it upstairs.
Hey! Ogaranya.
I hope the bed sheet
in that room has flowers.
I really like flowers. Hey.
Hey!
Excuse me. Hold on.
What's the problem? I know I'm a tenant.
Hey!
- Hey! Not that, excuse me.
- Thank you.
What's wrong with this... come!
Yea! Thank you.
- There's a teddy bear.
- Have you lost it?
This is my room.
Get your dirty legs off my bed
- and get out of my room.
- Hey, Catholic or what's your name?
Why are you shouting?
Were you an assembly prefect
in secondary school?
Calm down!
Were you not told
that I'm traveling abroad?
Can't you see that this room
befits someone that's traveling abroad?
Aside from that, if anyone sees this room,
they'll know this is the room
for the man of the house.
Hmm. Man, my foot!
If you don't want to see
the other side of me, get yourself...
remove your shoes and get out of my room.
There's no problem.
Catholic or caterer, it's not my concern.
Look, let me tell you.
I like the room that I'm in right now.
Do you understand? Just tell me,
who is supposed to choose the best room
in the house between a man and a woman?
- Tell me.
- Hmm, listen...
I would rather die,
than leave this room for you!
I will go crazy!
Bro, you don't get it! Do you?
- I'm not alright. It will not happen.
- I have seen you. You are troublesome.
I only pity you.
- Ah!
- What?
What's wrong with you?
What's wrong with me, how? Calm down.
I don't like the way you shout.
I pity you because I'm traveling.
Do you understand? Someone traveling out
should watch his steps.
Do you understand?
I don't want to ruin my reputation.
That's why. There's no problem.
You know what? My bad.
I take full responsibility of my actions.
Now, show me my room.
- Animal!
- Just take me to my room.
I have begged
and you're still saying "animal."
- Nuisance!
- Hmm.
This girl, you're stressing me.
What kind of problem is this?
Ah!
You see this room?
This is where you're going to put up...
for the meantime.
Don't get comfortable. Okay?
Don't get comfortable
until I'm able to gather your money
and kick you out of this house.
Kick who out? Me?
Do I look like a football?
Get lost! I don't understand
what you're doing.
What kind of room is this? Huh?
Can you see that
there's no spring on this bed?
I don't know what is wrong with you.
What kind of bed sheet is this?
Were you told Ben Ten was coming here?
Despite the huge amount
I paid. What is this?
Oh, God! Why is there
no television in this room?
Do people always scream and shout
from the cave where you're from?
Okay. I'm shouting? No problem.
Why's there no television in this room?
- Why is there no television in this room?!
- Does this place look like a hotel?
- Ah-ah.
- Huh?
If you want any extra service,
sir, you will pay for it.
- Really?
- And until then, keep your voice down!
Okay, no problem. Waiter!
Please, if I need anything
and I want to call the reception,
which number should I call? 001?
Please, I don't understand this room.
I don't know why I'd pay
for a room without a television.
It's not a VIP room at Ikoyi prison.
What is this? Look what... what?!
Oh, that's good. The war has just began.
Hey!
Wassy's father, their mother!
Hey... ah!
Wow!
- Ah... Wow! Oh God.
- Are you mad?
What's wrong with you?
If you have no sense
and you have no respect for me,
don't you know I've neighbours?
Can't you respect them?
- Neighbours?
- What's wrong with you?
Don't you want the neighbours to prosper?
What did you do? You... Ah!
You switched off my music?
Hold on. What's your problem?
Is that how to say
good morning in your village?
Huh? Do you know who sang
the song you just switched off?
Paso! Paso Wonder. Wassy's father.
Big man! Ah! If you do
this in my village, I swear to God,
you will be laid down.
They will buy canes and
the village elders will flog your buttocks
until they get swollen.
Who wants to come
from the same bush with you? Animal!
- I'm an animal?
- Yes.
Have you agreed
you're also from a bush? George Bush!
See... Seriously? Who is the person
that is actually planning
this trip for you?
I really hope you get scammed.
Because people like you are
the ones who leave this country,
you travel abroad and disgrace Nigeria.
- Me? Bring shame to the country?
- Yes.
or this country disgraces me?
Why do you think I want to travel?
Can't you see me? Do I look like
who should be in this country?
Forget the personality.
Over there, my accent will change.
I will start saying, "Yo fam. What's up?"
- Yo. I pity you.
- I'm warning you.
- Don't try this nonsense again.
- You too, don't try this nonsense.
- Don't try it.
- If not, you will be dealt with.
What's wrong with you? This is not a park.
You stop screaming
and you stop misbehaving.
This is my house.
Everything you've said,
you don't know what you say.
This house belongs to both of us.
You cannot say it's your house.
You paid how much? Little change.
You paid little change
for one small space,
suddenly you're the landlord of the house.
- Little change?
- Can you hear yourself?
Can your entire generation
afford this house?
- No problem. Small money.
- Have you lived in a house like this?
Small money, right? Very good.
Give me my money.
- Get out of this place! Get lost!
- It's small amount, right?
- Unserious fellow.
- Radical tout.
There's no problem.
- No problem.
- God forbid.
Hey! Ogaranya.
You will experience madness.
You will see madness.
You have ruined my enjoyment.
You will see what I will do to you.
- You ruined my fun?
- What's wrong with you?
Are you from the gutter or what?
Who is this?
What have I got myself into?
Funmilade! Do you realize that I have... oh!
You know what? Turn down the music.
Turn it down! Damn it!
God damn it! Turn it down!
- Do you know I have neighbors?
- Ah!
We'll die having fun tonight!
Yeh! Okay. Aye!
Please, turn it down.
I live with people in this estate.
I beg you. Please.
Turn it down!
- Funmi!
- Yeh! Ah!
Ah! Yeh!
- Funmi.
- You!
I'm going to call the security.
I swear. I will call the security on you.
- You are just a useless person.
- Eh!
Hello. Eve.
This will not work. I don't know
where you know this guy from.
I don't know how you're related
but please, get him out of my house.
It will not work.
It can't work. It will never work.
Listen, if I let my emotions go,
one second, that guy
will leave my house in a body bag.
Please!
Alright. Get down.
Please I've been begging you.
- Get down. You don't have money to pay me.
- Please I've been begging you.
Get down.
- Please.
- Give me my money.
- Give me one minute. Wait. Calm down.
- Give me my money.
You will spoil this bag.
- Do you know how much I got this bag?
- Give me my... How much is the bag?
- Give me my money.
- Please, sir, calm down.
- Please. Just give me my bag.
- Hey! Mr. Man are you... stop that!
It's my privacy. You cannot have my bag.
- Please.
- Give it to me.
Please.
Get lost. What's wrong with you?
Mr. Man, what's your business?
Why are you beating a woman? Are you mad?
- What's your business?
- How do you mean?
Don't you know it's a woman?
- Do you know what she did?
- What did she do?
She told me she's going
to see her boyfriend
and I should take her there.
She said he's not there.
I was driving her round
the estate for almost an hour.
- Really? Aunty, is that true?
- Sir, let me explain to you.
This guy would have broken my leg.
Sir... My boyfriend said that
I should come over to his aunt's place.
I explained to him
that I don't have money.
I don't have a penny in my account.
He said I shouldn't worry,
I should book a ride.
That when I get here he'll pay.
When we got to that place...
unfortunately, no one lives there.
I called back
and he redirected me to another place.
Now his phone is switched off.
I've been calling it.
I'm trying to explain that
I've been trying to call him,
he should give me five minutes.
Maybe his number will go through.
- That's what happened.
- That's what happened? Hold on...
A man invited you
and you didn't have your own money?
You couldn't borrow
from someone? What if I wasn't here?
You will just allow this man...
- How much is it?
- It's 3000 naira.
- Three thousand?
- Yes.
Can you see you're not smart?
You're beating a woman
just because of 3000.
She's owing me.
Do you have a sister?
I'm not sure you have.
Will you be happy
if someone treats your sister like this?
Eh? In fact, have it.
- The money is not complete. This is 2000.
- I know.
I'm not blindfolded. That's 2000.
You've beaten 1000 out of her.
- Now, enter your car and go.
- You have no money.
- I'll slap you! Are you mad?!
- Useless man.
- If I slap you, you'll throw up oil.
- Useless man.
- Goat.
- Sorry.
- Thank you, sir.
- You shouldn't do that.
If anyone invites you, always have money.
- Anything can happen anywhere.
- Yes, sir.
Ah-ah.
- Take this.
- Ah, thank you.
- You're welcome. Stand up, please.
- Thank you, sir.
Ah... wow.
What's up?
Ah!
Ogaranya.
Ah!
Oh.
It seems this girl is a mixed breed.
Either her mother or father
must be from America.
This is how American ladies apologize.
If I don't eat it, she will get angry.
Eh? Wow.
The Lord has set a table before me.
No problem. She even added juice.
Hey! Ogaranya.
Hm.
Ah.
The right proportion of salt.
She didn't make mistakes.
Not too much, not too small.
Ah!
Oh boy.
It seems I'll start
dating girls with bad character.
Hm-hm.
Ah... That's a Rottweiler.
Ah.
I'm doing everything I can
to get the money, please.
Just give me a little time.
Catherine, I swear to God.
If you owe me...
you must pay with your body part.
Don't joke with me.
Guys. It's not good
to judge a book by its cover.
I never knew she could make me a meal.
Hey! What is it?
- What is the problem?
- You should have waited there.
- Is your brain paining you?
- I'd have broken your head.
Will you break my head?
Look, this violence is too much.
I don't like violence.
This is more than domestic violence.
This is wild violence.
I cannot stay in this house with you.
Pack your things, get your
useless self and get out of my house.
Am I your chef? You ate my food?
I ate your food? Sorry, Chef Chi.
Did I enter your room to take the food?
I ate the food on this dining table.
Look, let me explain. This dining table,
kitchen, this sitting room
and even the compound, we share them.
- Okay?
- And you chose to eat it?
Did I cook for you?
I'm asking you, mad man. Who raised you?
Who raised this animal that you are?
You finished the food. Are you mad?
You see this food that you ate,
you will pay for it.
I promise you. You will pay for it.
God will punish
the idiot that gave birth to you.
Eh? Mama Funmi?
God will... Look, no worries.
No problem.
I thought you were a good person.
- That's why I ate the rice.
- Useless animal.
Sorry.
Manner-less upbringing.
- Gutter child.
- That's why you wanted to hit...
- I am manner-less?
- Yes!
There's no problem.
I'm in your house now.
You can teach me manners.
I thought she has changed for good,
that's why she gave me food to eat.
I was thinking,
I even called her a mixed breed.
I don't know what breed she is.
Canada or America.
This one is definitely from Nnewi.
Yeh.
Woo. Ah. Oh boy.
Ah.
Hm.
Woo. Ah.
Ogaranya.
Yea.
- Funmi.
- Yes?
- Hm. Did you fart?
- Yes.
Yes? Did you fart in my living room?
What is wrong with you?
I didn't know you were coming.
Why do you walk like a silent killer?
That's why you had to fart here?
Don't you have sense?
Don't you have a room?
Should I fart in my room?
That small room you gave me
that looks like a cubicle?
You want me to kill myself?
You want me to suffocate?
Sorry, don't be offended.
- Ah.
- What did you eat?
- I'm asking you?
- Beans and cucumber.
Get an air freshener.
Open the windows and freshen this place.
No problem. I'll do everything.
- Get up!
- Ah-ah.
Does that look like a couch?
Guy, where are you from?
Seriously, what do you people do there?
How do you people operate?
Don't be offended.
Don't be offended.
I won't let you get under my skin.
- Pig.
- I'm a pig?
- I'll accept anything you call me.
- Animal.
Animal? No problem.
Every human is a higher animal.
- You don't know about the homosapien?
- Useless child.
I'm useless? I'll accept it. I messed up.
Sorry. The fart was bad.
It's enough reason to be called an animal.
What is it? Stop following me.
Unfollow.
Ah-ah. I can perceive the fart here too.
Is it following me?
Ah-ah. This is... ah-ah.
Oh boy.
Oh... my baby.
You are crazy.
You're not happy I sang for you.
What's up? Where are you?
Come to my place quickly.
What kind of statement is that? Come here.
Yes.
Don't worry, the landlady is out.
She left already.
It's just the both of us.
Hey! The coast is clear.
Yeah!
Funmilade, your father.
Hey!
I don't like the way you shout.
You're not in Mushin.
- Stop acting crazy.
- See the staircase.
You slept under the staircase that year.
- You are crazy.
- Now you have a staircase.
Excuse me.
Look at this artwork... Funmi.
- Do you see this place?
- What is it?
Awesome!
Get outta here! You're troublesome.
What is wrong with you?
Two seconds. That's what it took God
to change your level overnight.
You're a real don. Who could block it?
- Funmi.
- What?
CCTV?
Eh! They're monitoring my...
Eh.
- What's your problem?
- Who could ever believe
your level would change?
It's a lie. You are
the chief cornerstone now.
Funmi.
- Ah, you're on a new level.
- Tega, let me tell you something.
- All you're seeing here...
- Yes.
...is a tip of the iceberg.
From this level, I am traveling abroad.
I was just waiting
for the right time to tell you.
Look at my guy. Look at the young Funmi.
The small carpenter.
A tiny-little carpenter with
a space so tiny, it feels like a needle.
- One cannot pass through.
- My level has changed.
- Is this you?
- I swear.
Eh? It was like where you were...
You know that year, in my mind,
I was seeing you like
you didn't have any glory.
Maybe your glory
was licked away like a stew.
Your own glory
will be licked instead. Bastard.
- What is wrong with you? Lunatic.
- You're crazy. Your glory will be licked.
- Lunatic. Get out.
- You're hurling words at me?
I'm not hurling words at you.
The thing is, I'm thinking about it.
You should also think about it.
What if a government contract
worth 56 million naira just meandered
its way towards you. Just like that.
- Didn't I tell you?
- It's a lie.
Tega, didn't I tell you?
I told you to believe in me.
You were looking for
an already-made Dangote. I told you
to wait 'cause my time is coming.
I know what I'm capable of.
I saw my future and it was bright.
There was a light at the end of
the tunnel, but you didn't believe it.
- You were misbehaving.
- It's a motivation.
Why are you insulting me?
You need to be calm.
- Huh?
- Is it because God picked your call?
- I borrowed you airtime. Don't forget.
- Which airtime did you borrow me?
Get out. Look,
that's how God works normally.
Even if you don't qualify and you wear
the jersey, you will play the match.
Oh God. Number 56.
Fifty six million. Have it. Their daddy.
See, as for this 56 million
you're talking about,
What is it? I've not said anything
and you're raising eye brows.
Whenever I talk about the money...
I've been noticing you.
- I'm all ears, speak.
- No, it's normal.
As a successful woman,
I have to be by your side.
Now that you've become successful,
it means I'm also successful.
As for the 56 million,
you have not told me...
Is it your gain?
Or is it your net worth?
Or the contract's total amount?
Tell me, how much is left?
Tega, wait. Why is the 56 million
the only thing on your mind?
That's what you've been talking about.
How is the 56 million your concern?
Are you my account officer? What's
your concern with the 56 million?
- It's the 56 million that...
- Let's change topic.
Ah-ah. What is it?
Is that why you want
to put your finger in my eye?
I will put my finger in eye.
Did you believe me before?
When we were... thank God I'm a good person.
If not, I wouldn't see you again, never.
- Did you believe me when I asked?
- Boss, calm down.
- Please, let's change topic.
- We can't change it.
You're talking about
traveling abroad. When you get there
you'll waste your resources
the way you wasted yourself.
- Why are you...
- Who's the waste?
I am the waste, right?
There's no cause for alarm.
Why are you feeling hot? Stop it.
- Can't I play with you?
- Don't play with me in a stupid manner.
Because I am taking this issue personal.
I can remember how
I told you to stay with me.
I know my future is bright,
what did you do? Didn't you abscond?
You were hustling on your own.
You wanted to make it alone.
You're back to me.
Thank God I'm a good person.
I wasn't supposed
to open this door for you.
Boss, take a good look at me.
If you want to insult me,
turn on your notification button.
You shouldn't misbehave
in a rich man's house. Behave yourself.
You sit properly.
You see the way I'm seated.
I didn't make any noise.
You can see the way I talk.
Talk like a rich man.
- Look here...
- I will slap your face.
- Are you insane?
- You know I'm not normal.
Look here...
What is... No! Yeh!
Don't play rough with me.
Are you mad? Useless fellow.
- Miserable being. If I hit you...
- Yea!
You see...
Funmi!
- Look here, I will injure you.
- Yeh!
- Ah. Funmilade. It's great.
- Yes?
Ah. This amala...
- I'm enjoying it.
- I swear.
It's soft. I'm enjoying it.
They don't have good amala around here.
I searched everywhere.
I don't know why they act posh here.
It's not like the one we eat over there.
They don't know
the local one is the real deal.
That's why I'm happy I found a spot.
This one hits the spot. I swear.
It hits the spot then kills the spot.
Don't let the pepper get into my head.
The thing is...
I'm feeling like a glutton now.
I'm filled already.
- Huh, you?
- I can't stop eating.
I know you well. How will you stop?
Don't you know
your stop button is damaged?
- Did you spoil it?
- You're crazy.
Open your mouth, let me give you pomo.
Don't bite my hand. What kind of...
What's wrong with you?
Why are you like this?
Do you want to scatter the wall?
You will see what Cathrine
will do to you when she returns.
Who is Catholic?
Should I slap
her father or her generation?
- Useless fellow.
- They will get it from me.
- You've not met this character. Oh boy!
- Catholic's grandmother.
Hold on. Don't get me annoyed.
Didn't you pay for the apartment?
- I paid. I paid in full.
- Very good.
It means Funmilade has his own space.
Whatever her name is,
she has her own space.
We will live like
the "shori-shori" people.
Indian people.
India? What has India got to do with this?
- How do you mean India?
- Don't you understand?
- Normally...
- Yes?
As a new wife...
You understand what
I'm saying. Boss, calm down.
As a new wife who just joined this family,
in India, their family...
It has choked me.
Watch. My thumbprint
should be on the wall.
So they would know
that there's a co-tenant already.
Housewife. The sister
or mother-in-law should be aware.
I don't understand. You know
I don't watch Indian movies.
Show me let me see what you're saying.
Watch me. I haven't
placed it well because it hasn't...
Watch.
Footprint!
Do you know that what you just did
reminded me of my secondary days.
- You did it?
- Yes. We dipped our hands in paint
and placed it on a paper.
- It's always fine.
- It's called canvas or sneakers.
Let me try mine.
Ah! Yours looks like the waka sign!
Waka!
Oh boy! Eh?
- Lunatic.
- Indian people are very artistic.
Let's do another one.
It'll make sense
if we sing an Indian as we do it.
Okay.
You should start it.
What kind of play is that?
Bros, is that you?
I... I didn't know it's you. I...
Hm.
Ogaranya.
I want this to serve as a warning.
Put it in your thick skull, boy.
Can you hear me? This is a reminder.
- Can you hear me?
- Yes.
Hear it very well. Let's go.
Funmilade!
- Funmilade!
- Yes? Catherine.
You didn't tell your co-landlord
about your birthday.
It's not right.
- Ah! Funmi!
- Why are you shouting?
- You ate my cake?
- What...?
Happy birthday.
You didn't tell me it's your birthday.
Happy birthday?
Funmi, happy birthday to who?
- Funmi, happy birthday to who?
- Calm down.
- Yeh!
- Are you mad?
- Calm down.
- Are you mad?!
God will punish you! Ah, oh God.
God will punish you. I swear.
I swear, God will punish you.
Oh God.
Oh God, I can't handle this.
What kind of suffering is this?
You're just preaching
and this is not a church.
That guy has barely lived here six days
and it already feels like six years.
What did you say when I paid?
Didn't you say I'd use
the kitchen the way I want?
You said I could use the parlor
and bedroom the way I want.
You said I'd use
the parlor the way I want.
Even the compound.
Wasn't that what you said? Did I lie?
- Yes.
- Did I lie?
No.
Why didn't you take him to live with you?
Your house is big enough to contain him.
Why bring him to me? That guy
constitutes nuisance everywhere he goes.
You know how much
I paid for this place, Evelyn.
With the amount I paid,
she's supposed to salute me every morning
and respect me.
Whenever I wake up, she's supposed
to lay a red rug from here to the kitchen
and play music like
Iyayiya hee, iyayiya oh
Iyayiya hee, iyayiya oh-oh
Wow. You brought him
to the psychiatric home.
You're protecting everyone
from this guy except me,
and I'm supposed to be your friend.
You're my friend.
Besides, only you can handle him.
This girl has the guts
to throw me a punch.
Me? Hey.
She should thank God
I'm not one who beats women.
Because what I'd have done to her...
If I give her a punch
on her esophagus, I swear
she'll spend seven days
and nights at Igbobi hospital.
Doctors will reject her.
How are you guys related?
You're two different people.
There's no connection.
I know. Look...
My only prayer is
that he gets his visa very soon.
Okay. Ice on my neck
Ice on my wrist
You know that's how stars do
If you aren't talking money
Don't call me for a show
- That's how stars do...
- Lunatic.
I'm going out.
And there are valuables in this house.
More valuable to me... than your life.
Lock my door.
No problem, witch.
I won't be back tonight.
You hang a bone on a dog's neck, right?
No worries.
Yeh!
Ah.
Okay.
We move.
You're my baby girl
Beautiful
- Hello, babe.
- Hello.
Look, let me call you back.
I'm in a meeting with some investors now.
Yes. I will call you back.
- Alright, bye.
- Meeting?
Oh my gosh.
Oh my God.
Lizzy... my love.
From the first day I met you,
I just knew you were the one.
You've been my light,
you've been my sunshine.
And I love you from
the deepest part of my heart.
I've had other women in my life.
But no one has come close to you, Lizzy.
Will you marry me, my love?
- Yes, right?
- Yes.
- Yeah.
- Yes, I will marry you.
She said yes!
She said yes.
- Please, don't kill me.
- Lunatic.
You're mad.
But seriously, this babe is cheating you.
Are we not enjoying her room now?
We will scatter everything
before she arrives. She's insane.
When we are tired of the bed,
we'll move to the floor.
- We'll put the bed sheet on the floor.
- Don't you trust me?
See... I'm feeling really good being here.
I'm thinking that, while we're here
and everything is feeling good,
you get me pregnant after we get married.
Then we have children.
The whole situation is making me think...
about you marrying me before you travel.
Huh? How do you mean marriage?
Seems my ears were blocked
as I lay down on your thighs,
my ears weren't working well.
Marriage?
I said something serious
and you got up hurriedly.
Look here, it won't be possible.
How do you mean marriage?
What is impossible in this discussion?
Marriage is normal. What's the big deal?
How is it ordinary?
Marriage involves planning one's future.
I have no plans of
marrying two wives. What marriage?
Have you been married?
How do you mean two wives?
I'm talking about me, your real babe
who will become your wife soon.
Okay. You know we have not discussed
this topic but I will explain it to you.
See, as for me, I am a man of vision.
Do you understand me?
I have planned it from my mother's womb
that when I want
to get married, it'll be a white woman.
That's why I want to travel abroad.
To start my life afresh.
Okay. I understand.
Exactly. You understand it.
What you're trying
to say now is, you won't marry me?
It's my dream. Don't you understand?
I have a dream and I must live it.
Mr. Man, what are you saying?
Will you marry me or not?
Hold on. Do you mean it?
If I'm to marry you,
won't I propose to you first?
Or won't I put a ring on your finger?
Is this how marriage
is planned in your village?
Forget about it.
Don't kill the vibe.
What's wrong with you?
- Smile.
- Don't touch me.
Yeh! Tega. Yeh!
Do you really mean it?
You want to get married?
You're crazy.
Even Mariah Carey is not married.
Turn. Let me give another round.
Are you crazy? You have not married me.
I'll give you...
I won't laugh.
Hello, ma.
Sorry to disturb you
but we've closed for the day, ma.
We've closed for today.
- Ah!
- Yeh!
Cathrine! Are you crazy?
- What sort of rubbish is that?
- Are you insane?
Are you crazy?
You poured water on me? Jesus!
- Sorry.
- My head. Do you want to kill me?
Sorry. Wait.
I will burst... No! Leave me.
- Calm down.
- I won't take it lightly.
- Oh!
- Calm down.
- Funmilade.
- Don't worry.
Don't try to stop me.
I will start calling everybody
- in this vicinity.
- Stop shouting.
- No!
- What is wrong with you?
Do you want to pour as well? I don't care.
No human being can ever try such!
Funmi, me!
- That small girl poured water on me.
- Don't be annoyed.
No. I'm angry.
You were stopping me from attacking her.
Why will you attack her? Calm down.
There's time for everything.
Didn't you see the pain
on her face when she entered?
God will punish the pain.
Ah! Did you cause the pain?
Did I cause the pain?
- Funmi... me, Tega?
- Calm down.
You should know you don't have
to cause someone's pain
for you to feel it. You're a woman.
Don't you understand
what I'm trying to say.
You know what, you should be on your way.
- We'll talk tomorrow.
- Who'll talk to you tomorrow?
- Funmi, if you call me I won't pick up.
- You won't pick up my call?
The both of you are insane.
I almost broke my head.
- Sorry.
- Don't call my phone.
So, you won't pick my call?
- Yeah, right. You are crazy.
- I almost broke my head. God punish you.
I'll call you tomorrow. Lunatic.
- Call me and see what I'll do.
- Make sure you use medication.
Because you really fell the other time.
Lunatic.
Your spinal chord must be affected.
Make sure you rest.
What kind of problem is this?
This girl poured water on me.
It'll get dry before tomorrow.
Ah-ah. What kind of problem is this?
Eve.
Ben is engaged to that girl.
He didn't even bother to take me home.
He left me there... unconscious.
How could he do this to me?
How could he break my heart like this?
But he said she was his sister.
Hello. Eve.
Thank you so much.
I saw the food you prepared.
And you cleaned up the whole place.
You should've woken me up, you know.
Me? I have not been to your house.
I don't know what you're talking about.
If you've not been to my house...
and you didn't
cook the food then... who did?
I don't know. Maybe Funmi did.
- Funmi?
- Yes.
He called me this morning
asking for some information.
But the funny this is,
he never mentioned cooking to me.
Information about what?
Ben.
Where are you coming from?
What sort of question is that?
What do you mean?
What's your business
with where I'm coming from?
I don't understand. Are you a vigilante?
Part of the Amotekun team?
- Please, excuse me. Let me pass.
- Hold on.
I didn't mean it that way.
Did you make the food?
Did I make the food?
Ah-ah.
Are you pulling my legs?
How do you mean, did I make food?
Why will I make food?
Do I look like a caterer?
Instead of me to make food.
I'll rather put on the gas
and set this house ablaze.
I'll burn down the entire place.
Please, excuse me. Why will I make food?
Me? Just imagine this girl.
Are you pulling my legs?
You better get a chef to make you a meal.
Yes?
Catherine. So you sent your thug
of a flatmate to come beat me up, right?
Don't worry.
For his actions,
this relationship is over.
O-v-e-r, over!
So, after everything that happened
you still think
that we have a relationship?
Ben, you need to see a doctor.
What?!
Mr. Bernard... well done.
You need to buy these drugs.
It'll help with the pains.
Okay, Doctor. Thank you.
Alright. See you later.
Oh, you're still on the phone. Catherine.
You will regret this.
I'm telling you, you will regret this.
This your bad character,
you'll never find a man to marry you.
Nonsense.
Get off my phone.
You'll regret this, you'll see.
Arrant nonsense!
I'm talking to you as your babe.
And your future wife.
Listen to me. Do you understand?
Cos what you're saying
does not make sense.
You don't have any entanglement,
alignment or connection with this babe.
Yet, you went to her boyfriend's house
to beat him mercilessly.
You beat him up. And you're here
trying to make me understand it.
Yes. Because he deserves it.
He doesn't have any right
to treat the woman like that.
What sort of rubbish is that?
No. you tell me. If you
don't like someone, you tell them.
Tell them and end
the relationship. That's all!
He shouldn't have treated her
that way. What if she died there?
- Sorry.
- What if she died? He left her there.
- Does it make sense?
- How is it any of your business?
One who fights on people's behalf.
Is it your business?
She is not your wife.
Can you hear me? What're you saying?
Why did you go there?
- Tega. Listen... let me tell you.
- I'm not listening to you, please.
She doesn't have to be
anything for me to defend her.
Do you understand?
Because this issue has to do with women.
You should even understand it better.
You shouldn't be saying this.
Because you're saying is nonsense.
You talk like a senseless person.
Because if you, a woman, are defending
what that guy did, then you're mad.
Funmilade, you're the lunatic.
You're crazy. Are you insane?
What is wrong with?
Are you talking to me in that manner?
- You slapped me?
- I will slap and deal with you
if you say any nonsense again.
Tega, see. Just thank God
that I'm not a woman beater.
Otherwise... if you try this rubbish
that you did just now again,
I swear, you won't be able
to use that hand anymore.
You what, just get out.
Leave here! Go away. Get out of here.
Before I get cross
with you, get out of here.
Get out! Is something wrong with you?
Are you alright? Get out of here.
Ah.
Ah.
Eh...
I haven't seen that crazy cousin of yours.
Whenever he's home, he always
locks himself in the room.
I hope everything is okay with him.
Are you for real?
You're asking after Funmi?
The very same one you find irritating.
Yes. Because he's my...
housemate and it's normal
for me to worry about him.
- Really?
- Yes.
Are you sure?
- Yes.
- Or maybe, you miss his noise and drama?
Or maybe you're missing
his drama and noise.
No.
Actually, yes. This house is too quiet.
Okay.
Well, he's had several... appointments
at the embassy so, he's quite busy.
But, he'll soon be done.
Okay.
You know that your cousin is very
mischievous. One has to be careful.
Okay.
Let's go!
- Ah-ah.
- Ah.
What is wrong with this one?
Ah.
You're playing Gabby.
This bastard! You're misbehaving.
- No!
- Isn't it?
Hey! Get down. Are you crazy?
Are you mad? If you do... hey!
What are you trying to do?
Where are you going? Are you mad?
Are you crazy? You're shameless.
- Are you harassing a woman?
- No, sir.
No? Now listen.
Real men fight men. They don't go
after helpless women.
What is wrong with you?
Who are you? You're trying
to form street, right?
No problem. Let me introduce myself.
My name is Funmilade Fadegera
Oguntamu, the great urchin of Mushin.
Mushin Olosa!
If you misbehave, I'll deal with you.
I will cut your neck. Are you mad?
What do you want?
I said, what do you want?
I don't want any problem.
I'm just here to collect my money.
She owes me.
- You came to collect your money.
- Yes.
That's why you're
harassing her? How much is it?
- Four point eight million.
- Four point eight million?
- And ten percent interest.
- Four point eight million?
That's why why you're laying
your hands on a woman. Right?
Men like you are the reason
why man are called dogs.
Okay. Let me ask you,
do you have a sister?
- Yes, sir.
- You have a sister?
If someone does this
to your sister, will you like it?
No, sir.
Are you okay?
- Take it.
- Sir?
I said take it. Don't you want your money?
Put your account number there.
Here, sir.
Very good. Check your phone.
I can't believe it.
- You've seen it, right?
- Yes, sir.
Now listen, I don't want
to see your legs in this house anymore.
I don't want to see your legs here
or see you around this compound.
Do you understand?
Now, stand up and get out.
Get out! Hey!
You want to leave just like that?
Is that how it's done?
You just want to leave?
You don't know
what you're supposed to do, right?
Aunty, I'm sorry.
Aunty, don't be offended.
I didn't know. This brother
has explained it.
I know the right thing now. I'm sorry.
I'm not like that. I'm very sorry, ma.
Now get out. Get out! Idiot.
Ogaranya.
- Are you okay?
- Yes.
Sit down.
Funmilade.
Thank you so much.
Why are you thanking me?
First... you took care of Ben.
And now... you've taken care of Gabby.
Even when you didn't have to.
Thank you so much. You don't know
the burden that
you've lifted off my shoulders.
Not many friends will do this.
Not even a family member.
And I'm grateful.
There's no problem. See...
that's how it is in our family.
We're very kind people.
We're generous.
Looking at you, one would
never imagine that you have...
such kindness in your heart.
Especially towards women.
Ah-ah. Hold on.
See, okay. Let me explain it to you.
As for the family I come from...
I'm the only male child
my mother gave birth to.
I grew up with girls.
All of them depend on me
to save them whenever anything happens.
And I have never let them down.
Do you understand? Because
Anytime I see women,
they always look like queens.
Do you get? No man in this world
should make a woman to be scared of him.
Not to talk of beating her.
I can't be okay with it.
Except I'm not there.
What I did is a very...
normal thing I was supposed to do.
Don't worry. It's normal.
Catholic, don't worry
we're together. Ogaranya.
We're together. It's a small thing.
- Don't worry.
- Thank you.
You're welcome. Don't worry.
But, Catherine, don't be offended.
I want to ask you a question.
I've been thinking. What made you
take a loan from that kind of person?
My dad.
He was sick.
He had kidney failure.
So, we spent a lot of money.
We needed a lot of money
for his treatment.
Dialysis and all.
I sold everything I had that had value.
Then they talked about a transplant.
I needed money for the surgery and...
I had no one to go to.
Someone then introduced me to Gabby.
Gabby gave me the money but...
after the surgery...
he passed. He couldn't make it.
The one I had left,
I had to use it for the burial.
So...
I just need a little bit of time but...
well, that's it.
I'm sorry.
So, even the money that I paid
for rent here, you gave it to him?
Actually, that's why you're here.
Well, but... at least
that one is over now. He won't...
disturb you again, right?
- Sorry.
- Funmilade, thank you so much.
Stop thanking me.
You will exhaust your thanks.
I've told you not to worry.
What's wrong with you? Don't worry.
Get yourself something to eat.
Thank you.
Eh...
I was going to ask you,
I haven't seen your girlfriend in a while.
Is she okay? Did she travel?
Tega? Does Tega
look like someone that can travel?
I just told her that we should
take a break for now, please.
Why? Did she serve you breakfast?
Breakfast? Can someone serve me breakfast?
Is she crazy?
One who attended an all-night party
doesn't eat breakfast. Don't you know?
So what happened?
See, the issue is a very long one.
She was annoyed I went
to beat Ben at his house because of you.
I tried explaining to her
that this is what happened. But...
she was not ready to listen. I felt like...
she's not mature enough
for her to think like.
I can't be with that
kind of person. But that's not
why I told her to stay away.
She slapped me.
In situations like that,
you know I don't beat women.
For her to have slapped me, it's better
to break a relationship than marriage.
Do you get?
About marriage, were
you planning to marry her?
Yes.
Tega and I have been together
for a very long time.
But I didn't tell her.
If not, she will feel elated.
It's better the way I saw her true color.
Funmi, if you really loved her, are you
telling me that you couldn't forgive
an ordinary slap?
Nothing is ordinary about a slap.
Domestic violence starts from slap.
- And you don't subscribe to violence.
- Yes.
That's very shocking.
I'm sorry but your entire being
reeks of violence.
- Ah-ah.
- Well, it seems that way.
Look, what...
I'm not a violent person.
I'm a gentle guy.
Don't look at me that way.
Welcome.
Wow.
What's going on here?
Food competition.
The first person to finish their food
without a fork, knife or spoon...
will win 20,000 naira.
So how easy is it to eat without a fork?
With your mouth.
- Really?
- Yes.
- Okay.
- Are you ready?
- I'm ready. Let me see.
- Are you sure?
- I'm sure.
- Don't worry, it's complete.
What's there? Do you underestimate me?
Bring this food, let me finish it.
- Really? A posh lady like you? Sure?
- I will shock you.
Alright, there's no problem.
A flamingo acting like wild animal.
- Are we to use our mouths?
- Yes.
Okay.
- At the count of three.
- Hold on.
- Are you ready?
- I'm ready.
- I'll count one to three.
- Okay.
Alright, let's go. One!
- Two!
- Hold on.
Two and half!
- Wait, calm down. I've not said three.
- I'm trying to pack my hair.
Okay.
And...
three!
- Please.
- What do you think about my friend?
Is it Catherine? Well...
she's a good person
if she uses her medication.
Really? So you guys
can relate well now? Right?
We're trying. Both of us
are not on the same level.
We are like water and kerosene.
We can never mix.
- Her ways aren't same with mine.
- I don't believe you.
- How do you mean you don't believe me?
- I don't believe you.
Look, did she tell you anything?
No.
- Are you sure?
- When did you start speaking English?
Please, stop it. Don't I normally
speak English? Am I not educated?
Please forget it. Are you sure
she didn't say anything?
No, actually.
What did you bring for me?
Why did come empty handed?
I don't understand what's wrong with you.
What kind of bed sheet is this?
Were you told Ben Ten is coming here?
Despite the huge amount I paid.
What is this?
Oh God.
What is it?
What is the problem?
- Is your brain paining you?
- I'd have broken your head.
You'll break my head?
This is not going to work. It won't work.
So please, just get your things,
get yourself up, and leave my house.
Funmi, happy birthday to who?!
- Are you mad?
- Calm down!
God will punish you.
Alright, stop that. Are you mad?
Do you want something?
- Do you want something?
- No.
Okay.
- You go first.
- Alright.
Catherine.
See, I have plenty things to say.
But I have to let you know that...
I came to Lagos so...
I could leave this country.
But since I came into this house...
I know that I've frustrated you so much.
I know that I've disturbed you.
I'm always happy when I frustrate you.
But I don't mean it in a bad way.
But I need to let you that...
you're a good person.
Because, another person
would have kicked me out the house
with the way I disturbed you.
But you didn't throw me out.
You still tolerated me.
I need to let you know
you're a good person.
And I appreciate that.
See... I think I like you.
I like you too.
Actually, I like you a lot.
I was...
when you came to my house,
it was a disaster.
I didn't want you anywhere around.
But this... short period that
we've been together
has opened me up to a side of you
that I didn't know existed.
And... getting to know you I...
can't believe the kind of heart you have.
Doesn't look anything like your actions.
- Wait.
- I'm serious.
You've given me peace. I've never felt...
as protected as I feel right now.
You provided for me.
You're amazing.
I wouldn't want it to stop.
But you know I'm not normal.
I know.
- I know.
- You know I'm crazy.
Abnormal is the new normal so it's fine.
So you don't mind?
Do you think we should take this further?
Yes.
- Yay!
- Oh my God. This guy, stop.
Ogaranya!
Not that way. This way.
I'll deal with you tonight.
- How did it go?
- Yes.
Canada, here I come!
Oh my God!
- Funmi, they gave you?
- Yes!
- Yes! They gave me.
- Wow!
- They dare not, I swear.
- Let me see.
Check it out. They're dead.
- Canada boy!
- Wait, where is it?
Yo fam.
- Oh!
- It's here. Look at it.
Aw.
Yay!
- Ogaranya!
- Ogaranya!
- But they didn't see my boy like this.
- Oh. That's true.
No problem. I will comport myself. Yo fam.
- I'm here with my baby.
- Hello.
- I'm here with Catherine.
- No. I will change my name when I travel.
- Really?
- Yeah.
- What will you change it to?
- Uh...
I don't know.
- I will give you a name.
- No. thank you.
Let me give you the name now.
It will suit you. Like, Suliya.
Subtitle Translation by: Uchenna Ezekwere
Hello...
Catherine... sorry for your loss.
Thank you.
When am I getting my money?
Ah... Gabby, you know that...
I will pay you. It's just
that I'm still mourning.
What's my business
with your mourning, Catherine?
Did I kill your father?
If you take a loan from the bank,
will you say you're mourning
when it's time to pay back?
An agreement is an agreement.
I've given you the money, pay me back.
You want Ogun to kill you?
I don't care if you lose your family.
But I still sympathize with you.
You are supposed to keep
your side of the bargain and pay my money.
I will pay in...
- in... two...
- Catherine, two days!
Okay. Yes, two days.
If you don't pay my money in two days,
I'll destroy your face with this knife.
I'll tear your face!
You won't recognize yourself.
Don't joke with me.
Get out.
Catherine. How many days did I tell you?
- Two days.
- Warn yourself.
Next!
Good evening, Mr. Gabby.
I want a loan of 500,000
that I will pay in two months.
Babe, you know I invested
my money into everything.
- Wow.
- And business is kind of slow.
I know.
Just that I have two days.
Two days to come up with the money
and I don't know where to go.
Six million, is no joke.
Right?
Have you called Ben?
Ben?
Ben never has money.
Of what use is that guy to you anyway?
That guy is just useless as it is.
When you need him the most,
he's not even there.
What can you sell?
How do you mean what can I sell?
I have sold everything
because of this situation. You know.
I asked my mechanic
to find me a buyer for the car.
The only thing I have is this house.
My father's legacy. I can't sell it.
I can't. If I try it,
just know that I have failed in life.
I have an idea.
What if...
we get you a flatmate. I mean,
someone to share the house with you.
That will bring some money, right?
And put Gabby off you for some time.
It's not a bad idea.
I'm just saying that
it's going to take time.
I need quick cash. Quick!
Okay.
My cousin, Funmi,
wants to leave the country.
Looking for a place to stay
in Lagos till the visa is processed.
A full year's rent will be paid.
But he will only stay for six months.
If you're cool with that,
I can put a call through.
And you get your money.
You're not playing with me now, are you?
No.
- Just like that?
- Just like that.
What are we waiting for?
I mean, put the call through.
Eh, I know you,
you like your space and privacy.
It seems you don't understand
what I'm dealing with.
Is there space and privacy in the grave?
Gabby threatened to kill me.
Please, make the call.
Okay. I will put the call through then.
- Catherine!
- Boss, please, ah!
Are you mad?!
Please, don't be annoyed.
That's all I could come up with.
That's what I sent to you.
Just give me time, I will pay.
I will come up with the balance.
Catherine, I swear to God.
If I don't get my money, Catherine...
You will look for tears
and you won't see any.
Don't misbehave.
Remove this phone from ear.
Where will I get 4.8 million naira
to pay Gabby in two months?
Ah, God. I need a miracle.
Hey!
Eve. My love, I'm so sorry.
I got the alert.
The moment I got it,
I transferred it to Gabby.
I didn't have time to confirm. I got it.
Thank you so much. I don't know
what I'd have done without you.
I understand. It's fine.
By the way,
Funmi is coming over this evening.
I thought I should inform you.
Okay, great. I will just
put the room in order.
Thank you so much. God will bless you.
Thank you, thank you so much.
Anything for you, darling.
Okay.
Hello, what's up?
Sorry...
- who are you?
- Who am I?
How do you mean who am I?
Weren't you told I was coming?
Okay, for a proper introduction...
my name is Funmilade Fadegera Oguntanmu.
- Do you understand?
- Sorry.
- I was expecting a Funmilayo.
- Funmilayo?
How do you mean Funmilayo?
No, it's Ransom Kuti.
I am... look here, leave the way
let me enter, I'm your new neighbour.
- Excuse me?
- Get out of the way!
Can't you see I'm carrying bags?
What's wrong with you?
Ah-ah! Wow!
Hey! Don't touch anything!
Why?
Ah!
- What?! Floral...
- Hey!
Don't touch any... I'm not playing with you.
Ah-ah.
This is serious. Come to my aid.
Why is she being hostile
to me on my first day?
Hello? Eve.
Tell me that tout,
who just moved into my house
is not the Funmi
you've been talking about.
- He's there already?
- He?
Did you just say he?
I'm supposed to share my...
You told me a Funmi was coming.
I thought you meant Funmilayo.
Catherine, I don't have
a cousin named Funmilayo.
It's Funmilade.
Girl. You expect me
to share my house with a guy!
An agbero for that matter.
My cousin is not an agbero.
Oh. Wow. Tell me about it.
I will not share my house
with a guy. Least of all, a tout.
You know what? Just sort yourselves out.
You guys are both adults, okay?
Do what you think is right.
Fine!
Oh. Ah, dear Lord.
- Em, Mr... Funmilade, right?
- Yes.
I don't appreciate people
putting their legs on my table
so get it off.
You don't appreciate? Then you depreciate.
Hold on, I don't understand you.
Should I take my legs off the table?
What did you bring to the table?
Since I got here, have you asked
if I will eat or drink some juice?
- Is that the right way to behave?
- Just stop.
This is not going to work.
It's not possible.
So please, just get your things,
get yourself, and leave my house.
- I should leave?
- Yes!
Hold on, do you know 50 leaves notebook?
Eh?
Listen, this whole thing,
was one being misunderstanding.
And I promise you,
I'll sort it out with Eve.
I just need you to leave.
We can't share the same roof. Please.
- Okay. Should I leave your house?
- Yes!
You should have said that.
You don't need to tell these stories.
You should've summarized it.
- I should leave your house?
- Yes!
It's simple. You should have told me.
Make sure you don't miss me when I'm gone.
Hey.
Thank you.
Alright.
What does this mean? Where is my money?
Did I come here for free?
Didn't I pay you?
You don't want to pay me back?
- You want to dupe me?
- That's what I'm saying.
Listen, I'll give you your money.
I just don't have it.
Just give me time. Time to sort it out.
- Okay, you don't have it?
- Yes.
- You need time to sort it out?
- Yes.
No problem. Take your time.
I will use the time you need
to sort it out, to sort out my room.
Do you understand?
I need to relax and feel at home.
Should I sleep under the bridge
after paying for an apartment?
Listen to yourself.
Have it. Help me take it upstairs.
Hey! Ogaranya.
I hope the bed sheet
in that room has flowers.
I really like flowers. Hey.
Hey!
Excuse me. Hold on.
What's the problem? I know I'm a tenant.
Hey!
- Hey! Not that, excuse me.
- Thank you.
What's wrong with this... come!
Yea! Thank you.
- There's a teddy bear.
- Have you lost it?
This is my room.
Get your dirty legs off my bed
- and get out of my room.
- Hey, Catholic or what's your name?
Why are you shouting?
Were you an assembly prefect
in secondary school?
Calm down!
Were you not told
that I'm traveling abroad?
Can't you see that this room
befits someone that's traveling abroad?
Aside from that, if anyone sees this room,
they'll know this is the room
for the man of the house.
Hmm. Man, my foot!
If you don't want to see
the other side of me, get yourself...
remove your shoes and get out of my room.
There's no problem.
Catholic or caterer, it's not my concern.
Look, let me tell you.
I like the room that I'm in right now.
Do you understand? Just tell me,
who is supposed to choose the best room
in the house between a man and a woman?
- Tell me.
- Hmm, listen...
I would rather die,
than leave this room for you!
I will go crazy!
Bro, you don't get it! Do you?
- I'm not alright. It will not happen.
- I have seen you. You are troublesome.
I only pity you.
- Ah!
- What?
What's wrong with you?
What's wrong with me, how? Calm down.
I don't like the way you shout.
I pity you because I'm traveling.
Do you understand? Someone traveling out
should watch his steps.
Do you understand?
I don't want to ruin my reputation.
That's why. There's no problem.
You know what? My bad.
I take full responsibility of my actions.
Now, show me my room.
- Animal!
- Just take me to my room.
I have begged
and you're still saying "animal."
- Nuisance!
- Hmm.
This girl, you're stressing me.
What kind of problem is this?
Ah!
You see this room?
This is where you're going to put up...
for the meantime.
Don't get comfortable. Okay?
Don't get comfortable
until I'm able to gather your money
and kick you out of this house.
Kick who out? Me?
Do I look like a football?
Get lost! I don't understand
what you're doing.
What kind of room is this? Huh?
Can you see that
there's no spring on this bed?
I don't know what is wrong with you.
What kind of bed sheet is this?
Were you told Ben Ten was coming here?
Despite the huge amount
I paid. What is this?
Oh, God! Why is there
no television in this room?
Do people always scream and shout
from the cave where you're from?
Okay. I'm shouting? No problem.
Why's there no television in this room?
- Why is there no television in this room?!
- Does this place look like a hotel?
- Ah-ah.
- Huh?
If you want any extra service,
sir, you will pay for it.
- Really?
- And until then, keep your voice down!
Okay, no problem. Waiter!
Please, if I need anything
and I want to call the reception,
which number should I call? 001?
Please, I don't understand this room.
I don't know why I'd pay
for a room without a television.
It's not a VIP room at Ikoyi prison.
What is this? Look what... what?!
Oh, that's good. The war has just began.
Hey!
Wassy's father, their mother!
Hey... ah!
Wow!
- Ah... Wow! Oh God.
- Are you mad?
What's wrong with you?
If you have no sense
and you have no respect for me,
don't you know I've neighbours?
Can't you respect them?
- Neighbours?
- What's wrong with you?
Don't you want the neighbours to prosper?
What did you do? You... Ah!
You switched off my music?
Hold on. What's your problem?
Is that how to say
good morning in your village?
Huh? Do you know who sang
the song you just switched off?
Paso! Paso Wonder. Wassy's father.
Big man! Ah! If you do
this in my village, I swear to God,
you will be laid down.
They will buy canes and
the village elders will flog your buttocks
until they get swollen.
Who wants to come
from the same bush with you? Animal!
- I'm an animal?
- Yes.
Have you agreed
you're also from a bush? George Bush!
See... Seriously? Who is the person
that is actually planning
this trip for you?
I really hope you get scammed.
Because people like you are
the ones who leave this country,
you travel abroad and disgrace Nigeria.
- Me? Bring shame to the country?
- Yes.
or this country disgraces me?
Why do you think I want to travel?
Can't you see me? Do I look like
who should be in this country?
Forget the personality.
Over there, my accent will change.
I will start saying, "Yo fam. What's up?"
- Yo. I pity you.
- I'm warning you.
- Don't try this nonsense again.
- You too, don't try this nonsense.
- Don't try it.
- If not, you will be dealt with.
What's wrong with you? This is not a park.
You stop screaming
and you stop misbehaving.
This is my house.
Everything you've said,
you don't know what you say.
This house belongs to both of us.
You cannot say it's your house.
You paid how much? Little change.
You paid little change
for one small space,
suddenly you're the landlord of the house.
- Little change?
- Can you hear yourself?
Can your entire generation
afford this house?
- No problem. Small money.
- Have you lived in a house like this?
Small money, right? Very good.
Give me my money.
- Get out of this place! Get lost!
- It's small amount, right?
- Unserious fellow.
- Radical tout.
There's no problem.
- No problem.
- God forbid.
Hey! Ogaranya.
You will experience madness.
You will see madness.
You have ruined my enjoyment.
You will see what I will do to you.
- You ruined my fun?
- What's wrong with you?
Are you from the gutter or what?
Who is this?
What have I got myself into?
Funmilade! Do you realize that I have... oh!
You know what? Turn down the music.
Turn it down! Damn it!
God damn it! Turn it down!
- Do you know I have neighbors?
- Ah!
We'll die having fun tonight!
Yeh! Okay. Aye!
Please, turn it down.
I live with people in this estate.
I beg you. Please.
Turn it down!
- Funmi!
- Yeh! Ah!
Ah! Yeh!
- Funmi.
- You!
I'm going to call the security.
I swear. I will call the security on you.
- You are just a useless person.
- Eh!
Hello. Eve.
This will not work. I don't know
where you know this guy from.
I don't know how you're related
but please, get him out of my house.
It will not work.
It can't work. It will never work.
Listen, if I let my emotions go,
one second, that guy
will leave my house in a body bag.
Please!
Alright. Get down.
Please I've been begging you.
- Get down. You don't have money to pay me.
- Please I've been begging you.
Get down.
- Please.
- Give me my money.
- Give me one minute. Wait. Calm down.
- Give me my money.
You will spoil this bag.
- Do you know how much I got this bag?
- Give me my... How much is the bag?
- Give me my money.
- Please, sir, calm down.
- Please. Just give me my bag.
- Hey! Mr. Man are you... stop that!
It's my privacy. You cannot have my bag.
- Please.
- Give it to me.
Please.
Get lost. What's wrong with you?
Mr. Man, what's your business?
Why are you beating a woman? Are you mad?
- What's your business?
- How do you mean?
Don't you know it's a woman?
- Do you know what she did?
- What did she do?
She told me she's going
to see her boyfriend
and I should take her there.
She said he's not there.
I was driving her round
the estate for almost an hour.
- Really? Aunty, is that true?
- Sir, let me explain to you.
This guy would have broken my leg.
Sir... My boyfriend said that
I should come over to his aunt's place.
I explained to him
that I don't have money.
I don't have a penny in my account.
He said I shouldn't worry,
I should book a ride.
That when I get here he'll pay.
When we got to that place...
unfortunately, no one lives there.
I called back
and he redirected me to another place.
Now his phone is switched off.
I've been calling it.
I'm trying to explain that
I've been trying to call him,
he should give me five minutes.
Maybe his number will go through.
- That's what happened.
- That's what happened? Hold on...
A man invited you
and you didn't have your own money?
You couldn't borrow
from someone? What if I wasn't here?
You will just allow this man...
- How much is it?
- It's 3000 naira.
- Three thousand?
- Yes.
Can you see you're not smart?
You're beating a woman
just because of 3000.
She's owing me.
Do you have a sister?
I'm not sure you have.
Will you be happy
if someone treats your sister like this?
Eh? In fact, have it.
- The money is not complete. This is 2000.
- I know.
I'm not blindfolded. That's 2000.
You've beaten 1000 out of her.
- Now, enter your car and go.
- You have no money.
- I'll slap you! Are you mad?!
- Useless man.
- If I slap you, you'll throw up oil.
- Useless man.
- Goat.
- Sorry.
- Thank you, sir.
- You shouldn't do that.
If anyone invites you, always have money.
- Anything can happen anywhere.
- Yes, sir.
Ah-ah.
- Take this.
- Ah, thank you.
- You're welcome. Stand up, please.
- Thank you, sir.
Ah... wow.
What's up?
Ah!
Ogaranya.
Ah!
Oh.
It seems this girl is a mixed breed.
Either her mother or father
must be from America.
This is how American ladies apologize.
If I don't eat it, she will get angry.
Eh? Wow.
The Lord has set a table before me.
No problem. She even added juice.
Hey! Ogaranya.
Hm.
Ah.
The right proportion of salt.
She didn't make mistakes.
Not too much, not too small.
Ah!
Oh boy.
It seems I'll start
dating girls with bad character.
Hm-hm.
Ah... That's a Rottweiler.
Ah.
I'm doing everything I can
to get the money, please.
Just give me a little time.
Catherine, I swear to God.
If you owe me...
you must pay with your body part.
Don't joke with me.
Guys. It's not good
to judge a book by its cover.
I never knew she could make me a meal.
Hey! What is it?
- What is the problem?
- You should have waited there.
- Is your brain paining you?
- I'd have broken your head.
Will you break my head?
Look, this violence is too much.
I don't like violence.
This is more than domestic violence.
This is wild violence.
I cannot stay in this house with you.
Pack your things, get your
useless self and get out of my house.
Am I your chef? You ate my food?
I ate your food? Sorry, Chef Chi.
Did I enter your room to take the food?
I ate the food on this dining table.
Look, let me explain. This dining table,
kitchen, this sitting room
and even the compound, we share them.
- Okay?
- And you chose to eat it?
Did I cook for you?
I'm asking you, mad man. Who raised you?
Who raised this animal that you are?
You finished the food. Are you mad?
You see this food that you ate,
you will pay for it.
I promise you. You will pay for it.
God will punish
the idiot that gave birth to you.
Eh? Mama Funmi?
God will... Look, no worries.
No problem.
I thought you were a good person.
- That's why I ate the rice.
- Useless animal.
Sorry.
Manner-less upbringing.
- Gutter child.
- That's why you wanted to hit...
- I am manner-less?
- Yes!
There's no problem.
I'm in your house now.
You can teach me manners.
I thought she has changed for good,
that's why she gave me food to eat.
I was thinking,
I even called her a mixed breed.
I don't know what breed she is.
Canada or America.
This one is definitely from Nnewi.
Yeh.
Woo. Ah. Oh boy.
Ah.
Hm.
Woo. Ah.
Ogaranya.
Yea.
- Funmi.
- Yes?
- Hm. Did you fart?
- Yes.
Yes? Did you fart in my living room?
What is wrong with you?
I didn't know you were coming.
Why do you walk like a silent killer?
That's why you had to fart here?
Don't you have sense?
Don't you have a room?
Should I fart in my room?
That small room you gave me
that looks like a cubicle?
You want me to kill myself?
You want me to suffocate?
Sorry, don't be offended.
- Ah.
- What did you eat?
- I'm asking you?
- Beans and cucumber.
Get an air freshener.
Open the windows and freshen this place.
No problem. I'll do everything.
- Get up!
- Ah-ah.
Does that look like a couch?
Guy, where are you from?
Seriously, what do you people do there?
How do you people operate?
Don't be offended.
Don't be offended.
I won't let you get under my skin.
- Pig.
- I'm a pig?
- I'll accept anything you call me.
- Animal.
Animal? No problem.
Every human is a higher animal.
- You don't know about the homosapien?
- Useless child.
I'm useless? I'll accept it. I messed up.
Sorry. The fart was bad.
It's enough reason to be called an animal.
What is it? Stop following me.
Unfollow.
Ah-ah. I can perceive the fart here too.
Is it following me?
Ah-ah. This is... ah-ah.
Oh boy.
Oh... my baby.
You are crazy.
You're not happy I sang for you.
What's up? Where are you?
Come to my place quickly.
What kind of statement is that? Come here.
Yes.
Don't worry, the landlady is out.
She left already.
It's just the both of us.
Hey! The coast is clear.
Yeah!
Funmilade, your father.
Hey!
I don't like the way you shout.
You're not in Mushin.
- Stop acting crazy.
- See the staircase.
You slept under the staircase that year.
- You are crazy.
- Now you have a staircase.
Excuse me.
Look at this artwork... Funmi.
- Do you see this place?
- What is it?
Awesome!
Get outta here! You're troublesome.
What is wrong with you?
Two seconds. That's what it took God
to change your level overnight.
You're a real don. Who could block it?
- Funmi.
- What?
CCTV?
Eh! They're monitoring my...
Eh.
- What's your problem?
- Who could ever believe
your level would change?
It's a lie. You are
the chief cornerstone now.
Funmi.
- Ah, you're on a new level.
- Tega, let me tell you something.
- All you're seeing here...
- Yes.
...is a tip of the iceberg.
From this level, I am traveling abroad.
I was just waiting
for the right time to tell you.
Look at my guy. Look at the young Funmi.
The small carpenter.
A tiny-little carpenter with
a space so tiny, it feels like a needle.
- One cannot pass through.
- My level has changed.
- Is this you?
- I swear.
Eh? It was like where you were...
You know that year, in my mind,
I was seeing you like
you didn't have any glory.
Maybe your glory
was licked away like a stew.
Your own glory
will be licked instead. Bastard.
- What is wrong with you? Lunatic.
- You're crazy. Your glory will be licked.
- Lunatic. Get out.
- You're hurling words at me?
I'm not hurling words at you.
The thing is, I'm thinking about it.
You should also think about it.
What if a government contract
worth 56 million naira just meandered
its way towards you. Just like that.
- Didn't I tell you?
- It's a lie.
Tega, didn't I tell you?
I told you to believe in me.
You were looking for
an already-made Dangote. I told you
to wait 'cause my time is coming.
I know what I'm capable of.
I saw my future and it was bright.
There was a light at the end of
the tunnel, but you didn't believe it.
- You were misbehaving.
- It's a motivation.
Why are you insulting me?
You need to be calm.
- Huh?
- Is it because God picked your call?
- I borrowed you airtime. Don't forget.
- Which airtime did you borrow me?
Get out. Look,
that's how God works normally.
Even if you don't qualify and you wear
the jersey, you will play the match.
Oh God. Number 56.
Fifty six million. Have it. Their daddy.
See, as for this 56 million
you're talking about,
What is it? I've not said anything
and you're raising eye brows.
Whenever I talk about the money...
I've been noticing you.
- I'm all ears, speak.
- No, it's normal.
As a successful woman,
I have to be by your side.
Now that you've become successful,
it means I'm also successful.
As for the 56 million,
you have not told me...
Is it your gain?
Or is it your net worth?
Or the contract's total amount?
Tell me, how much is left?
Tega, wait. Why is the 56 million
the only thing on your mind?
That's what you've been talking about.
How is the 56 million your concern?
Are you my account officer? What's
your concern with the 56 million?
- It's the 56 million that...
- Let's change topic.
Ah-ah. What is it?
Is that why you want
to put your finger in my eye?
I will put my finger in eye.
Did you believe me before?
When we were... thank God I'm a good person.
If not, I wouldn't see you again, never.
- Did you believe me when I asked?
- Boss, calm down.
- Please, let's change topic.
- We can't change it.
You're talking about
traveling abroad. When you get there
you'll waste your resources
the way you wasted yourself.
- Why are you...
- Who's the waste?
I am the waste, right?
There's no cause for alarm.
Why are you feeling hot? Stop it.
- Can't I play with you?
- Don't play with me in a stupid manner.
Because I am taking this issue personal.
I can remember how
I told you to stay with me.
I know my future is bright,
what did you do? Didn't you abscond?
You were hustling on your own.
You wanted to make it alone.
You're back to me.
Thank God I'm a good person.
I wasn't supposed
to open this door for you.
Boss, take a good look at me.
If you want to insult me,
turn on your notification button.
You shouldn't misbehave
in a rich man's house. Behave yourself.
You sit properly.
You see the way I'm seated.
I didn't make any noise.
You can see the way I talk.
Talk like a rich man.
- Look here...
- I will slap your face.
- Are you insane?
- You know I'm not normal.
Look here...
What is... No! Yeh!
Don't play rough with me.
Are you mad? Useless fellow.
- Miserable being. If I hit you...
- Yea!
You see...
Funmi!
- Look here, I will injure you.
- Yeh!
- Ah. Funmilade. It's great.
- Yes?
Ah. This amala...
- I'm enjoying it.
- I swear.
It's soft. I'm enjoying it.
They don't have good amala around here.
I searched everywhere.
I don't know why they act posh here.
It's not like the one we eat over there.
They don't know
the local one is the real deal.
That's why I'm happy I found a spot.
This one hits the spot. I swear.
It hits the spot then kills the spot.
Don't let the pepper get into my head.
The thing is...
I'm feeling like a glutton now.
I'm filled already.
- Huh, you?
- I can't stop eating.
I know you well. How will you stop?
Don't you know
your stop button is damaged?
- Did you spoil it?
- You're crazy.
Open your mouth, let me give you pomo.
Don't bite my hand. What kind of...
What's wrong with you?
Why are you like this?
Do you want to scatter the wall?
You will see what Cathrine
will do to you when she returns.
Who is Catholic?
Should I slap
her father or her generation?
- Useless fellow.
- They will get it from me.
- You've not met this character. Oh boy!
- Catholic's grandmother.
Hold on. Don't get me annoyed.
Didn't you pay for the apartment?
- I paid. I paid in full.
- Very good.
It means Funmilade has his own space.
Whatever her name is,
she has her own space.
We will live like
the "shori-shori" people.
Indian people.
India? What has India got to do with this?
- How do you mean India?
- Don't you understand?
- Normally...
- Yes?
As a new wife...
You understand what
I'm saying. Boss, calm down.
As a new wife who just joined this family,
in India, their family...
It has choked me.
Watch. My thumbprint
should be on the wall.
So they would know
that there's a co-tenant already.
Housewife. The sister
or mother-in-law should be aware.
I don't understand. You know
I don't watch Indian movies.
Show me let me see what you're saying.
Watch me. I haven't
placed it well because it hasn't...
Watch.
Footprint!
Do you know that what you just did
reminded me of my secondary days.
- You did it?
- Yes. We dipped our hands in paint
and placed it on a paper.
- It's always fine.
- It's called canvas or sneakers.
Let me try mine.
Ah! Yours looks like the waka sign!
Waka!
Oh boy! Eh?
- Lunatic.
- Indian people are very artistic.
Let's do another one.
It'll make sense
if we sing an Indian as we do it.
Okay.
You should start it.
What kind of play is that?
Bros, is that you?
I... I didn't know it's you. I...
Hm.
Ogaranya.
I want this to serve as a warning.
Put it in your thick skull, boy.
Can you hear me? This is a reminder.
- Can you hear me?
- Yes.
Hear it very well. Let's go.
Funmilade!
- Funmilade!
- Yes? Catherine.
You didn't tell your co-landlord
about your birthday.
It's not right.
- Ah! Funmi!
- Why are you shouting?
- You ate my cake?
- What...?
Happy birthday.
You didn't tell me it's your birthday.
Happy birthday?
Funmi, happy birthday to who?
- Funmi, happy birthday to who?
- Calm down.
- Yeh!
- Are you mad?
- Calm down.
- Are you mad?!
God will punish you! Ah, oh God.
God will punish you. I swear.
I swear, God will punish you.
Oh God.
Oh God, I can't handle this.
What kind of suffering is this?
You're just preaching
and this is not a church.
That guy has barely lived here six days
and it already feels like six years.
What did you say when I paid?
Didn't you say I'd use
the kitchen the way I want?
You said I could use the parlor
and bedroom the way I want.
You said I'd use
the parlor the way I want.
Even the compound.
Wasn't that what you said? Did I lie?
- Yes.
- Did I lie?
No.
Why didn't you take him to live with you?
Your house is big enough to contain him.
Why bring him to me? That guy
constitutes nuisance everywhere he goes.
You know how much
I paid for this place, Evelyn.
With the amount I paid,
she's supposed to salute me every morning
and respect me.
Whenever I wake up, she's supposed
to lay a red rug from here to the kitchen
and play music like
Iyayiya hee, iyayiya oh
Iyayiya hee, iyayiya oh-oh
Wow. You brought him
to the psychiatric home.
You're protecting everyone
from this guy except me,
and I'm supposed to be your friend.
You're my friend.
Besides, only you can handle him.
This girl has the guts
to throw me a punch.
Me? Hey.
She should thank God
I'm not one who beats women.
Because what I'd have done to her...
If I give her a punch
on her esophagus, I swear
she'll spend seven days
and nights at Igbobi hospital.
Doctors will reject her.
How are you guys related?
You're two different people.
There's no connection.
I know. Look...
My only prayer is
that he gets his visa very soon.
Okay. Ice on my neck
Ice on my wrist
You know that's how stars do
If you aren't talking money
Don't call me for a show
- That's how stars do...
- Lunatic.
I'm going out.
And there are valuables in this house.
More valuable to me... than your life.
Lock my door.
No problem, witch.
I won't be back tonight.
You hang a bone on a dog's neck, right?
No worries.
Yeh!
Ah.
Okay.
We move.
You're my baby girl
Beautiful
- Hello, babe.
- Hello.
Look, let me call you back.
I'm in a meeting with some investors now.
Yes. I will call you back.
- Alright, bye.
- Meeting?
Oh my gosh.
Oh my God.
Lizzy... my love.
From the first day I met you,
I just knew you were the one.
You've been my light,
you've been my sunshine.
And I love you from
the deepest part of my heart.
I've had other women in my life.
But no one has come close to you, Lizzy.
Will you marry me, my love?
- Yes, right?
- Yes.
- Yeah.
- Yes, I will marry you.
She said yes!
She said yes.
- Please, don't kill me.
- Lunatic.
You're mad.
But seriously, this babe is cheating you.
Are we not enjoying her room now?
We will scatter everything
before she arrives. She's insane.
When we are tired of the bed,
we'll move to the floor.
- We'll put the bed sheet on the floor.
- Don't you trust me?
See... I'm feeling really good being here.
I'm thinking that, while we're here
and everything is feeling good,
you get me pregnant after we get married.
Then we have children.
The whole situation is making me think...
about you marrying me before you travel.
Huh? How do you mean marriage?
Seems my ears were blocked
as I lay down on your thighs,
my ears weren't working well.
Marriage?
I said something serious
and you got up hurriedly.
Look here, it won't be possible.
How do you mean marriage?
What is impossible in this discussion?
Marriage is normal. What's the big deal?
How is it ordinary?
Marriage involves planning one's future.
I have no plans of
marrying two wives. What marriage?
Have you been married?
How do you mean two wives?
I'm talking about me, your real babe
who will become your wife soon.
Okay. You know we have not discussed
this topic but I will explain it to you.
See, as for me, I am a man of vision.
Do you understand me?
I have planned it from my mother's womb
that when I want
to get married, it'll be a white woman.
That's why I want to travel abroad.
To start my life afresh.
Okay. I understand.
Exactly. You understand it.
What you're trying
to say now is, you won't marry me?
It's my dream. Don't you understand?
I have a dream and I must live it.
Mr. Man, what are you saying?
Will you marry me or not?
Hold on. Do you mean it?
If I'm to marry you,
won't I propose to you first?
Or won't I put a ring on your finger?
Is this how marriage
is planned in your village?
Forget about it.
Don't kill the vibe.
What's wrong with you?
- Smile.
- Don't touch me.
Yeh! Tega. Yeh!
Do you really mean it?
You want to get married?
You're crazy.
Even Mariah Carey is not married.
Turn. Let me give another round.
Are you crazy? You have not married me.
I'll give you...
I won't laugh.
Hello, ma.
Sorry to disturb you
but we've closed for the day, ma.
We've closed for today.
- Ah!
- Yeh!
Cathrine! Are you crazy?
- What sort of rubbish is that?
- Are you insane?
Are you crazy?
You poured water on me? Jesus!
- Sorry.
- My head. Do you want to kill me?
Sorry. Wait.
I will burst... No! Leave me.
- Calm down.
- I won't take it lightly.
- Oh!
- Calm down.
- Funmilade.
- Don't worry.
Don't try to stop me.
I will start calling everybody
- in this vicinity.
- Stop shouting.
- No!
- What is wrong with you?
Do you want to pour as well? I don't care.
No human being can ever try such!
Funmi, me!
- That small girl poured water on me.
- Don't be annoyed.
No. I'm angry.
You were stopping me from attacking her.
Why will you attack her? Calm down.
There's time for everything.
Didn't you see the pain
on her face when she entered?
God will punish the pain.
Ah! Did you cause the pain?
Did I cause the pain?
- Funmi... me, Tega?
- Calm down.
You should know you don't have
to cause someone's pain
for you to feel it. You're a woman.
Don't you understand
what I'm trying to say.
You know what, you should be on your way.
- We'll talk tomorrow.
- Who'll talk to you tomorrow?
- Funmi, if you call me I won't pick up.
- You won't pick up my call?
The both of you are insane.
I almost broke my head.
- Sorry.
- Don't call my phone.
So, you won't pick my call?
- Yeah, right. You are crazy.
- I almost broke my head. God punish you.
I'll call you tomorrow. Lunatic.
- Call me and see what I'll do.
- Make sure you use medication.
Because you really fell the other time.
Lunatic.
Your spinal chord must be affected.
Make sure you rest.
What kind of problem is this?
This girl poured water on me.
It'll get dry before tomorrow.
Ah-ah. What kind of problem is this?
Eve.
Ben is engaged to that girl.
He didn't even bother to take me home.
He left me there... unconscious.
How could he do this to me?
How could he break my heart like this?
But he said she was his sister.
Hello. Eve.
Thank you so much.
I saw the food you prepared.
And you cleaned up the whole place.
You should've woken me up, you know.
Me? I have not been to your house.
I don't know what you're talking about.
If you've not been to my house...
and you didn't
cook the food then... who did?
I don't know. Maybe Funmi did.
- Funmi?
- Yes.
He called me this morning
asking for some information.
But the funny this is,
he never mentioned cooking to me.
Information about what?
Ben.
Where are you coming from?
What sort of question is that?
What do you mean?
What's your business
with where I'm coming from?
I don't understand. Are you a vigilante?
Part of the Amotekun team?
- Please, excuse me. Let me pass.
- Hold on.
I didn't mean it that way.
Did you make the food?
Did I make the food?
Ah-ah.
Are you pulling my legs?
How do you mean, did I make food?
Why will I make food?
Do I look like a caterer?
Instead of me to make food.
I'll rather put on the gas
and set this house ablaze.
I'll burn down the entire place.
Please, excuse me. Why will I make food?
Me? Just imagine this girl.
Are you pulling my legs?
You better get a chef to make you a meal.
Yes?
Catherine. So you sent your thug
of a flatmate to come beat me up, right?
Don't worry.
For his actions,
this relationship is over.
O-v-e-r, over!
So, after everything that happened
you still think
that we have a relationship?
Ben, you need to see a doctor.
What?!
Mr. Bernard... well done.
You need to buy these drugs.
It'll help with the pains.
Okay, Doctor. Thank you.
Alright. See you later.
Oh, you're still on the phone. Catherine.
You will regret this.
I'm telling you, you will regret this.
This your bad character,
you'll never find a man to marry you.
Nonsense.
Get off my phone.
You'll regret this, you'll see.
Arrant nonsense!
I'm talking to you as your babe.
And your future wife.
Listen to me. Do you understand?
Cos what you're saying
does not make sense.
You don't have any entanglement,
alignment or connection with this babe.
Yet, you went to her boyfriend's house
to beat him mercilessly.
You beat him up. And you're here
trying to make me understand it.
Yes. Because he deserves it.
He doesn't have any right
to treat the woman like that.
What sort of rubbish is that?
No. you tell me. If you
don't like someone, you tell them.
Tell them and end
the relationship. That's all!
He shouldn't have treated her
that way. What if she died there?
- Sorry.
- What if she died? He left her there.
- Does it make sense?
- How is it any of your business?
One who fights on people's behalf.
Is it your business?
She is not your wife.
Can you hear me? What're you saying?
Why did you go there?
- Tega. Listen... let me tell you.
- I'm not listening to you, please.
She doesn't have to be
anything for me to defend her.
Do you understand?
Because this issue has to do with women.
You should even understand it better.
You shouldn't be saying this.
Because you're saying is nonsense.
You talk like a senseless person.
Because if you, a woman, are defending
what that guy did, then you're mad.
Funmilade, you're the lunatic.
You're crazy. Are you insane?
What is wrong with?
Are you talking to me in that manner?
- You slapped me?
- I will slap and deal with you
if you say any nonsense again.
Tega, see. Just thank God
that I'm not a woman beater.
Otherwise... if you try this rubbish
that you did just now again,
I swear, you won't be able
to use that hand anymore.
You what, just get out.
Leave here! Go away. Get out of here.
Before I get cross
with you, get out of here.
Get out! Is something wrong with you?
Are you alright? Get out of here.
Ah.
Ah.
Eh...
I haven't seen that crazy cousin of yours.
Whenever he's home, he always
locks himself in the room.
I hope everything is okay with him.
Are you for real?
You're asking after Funmi?
The very same one you find irritating.
Yes. Because he's my...
housemate and it's normal
for me to worry about him.
- Really?
- Yes.
Are you sure?
- Yes.
- Or maybe, you miss his noise and drama?
Or maybe you're missing
his drama and noise.
No.
Actually, yes. This house is too quiet.
Okay.
Well, he's had several... appointments
at the embassy so, he's quite busy.
But, he'll soon be done.
Okay.
You know that your cousin is very
mischievous. One has to be careful.
Okay.
Let's go!
- Ah-ah.
- Ah.
What is wrong with this one?
Ah.
You're playing Gabby.
This bastard! You're misbehaving.
- No!
- Isn't it?
Hey! Get down. Are you crazy?
Are you mad? If you do... hey!
What are you trying to do?
Where are you going? Are you mad?
Are you crazy? You're shameless.
- Are you harassing a woman?
- No, sir.
No? Now listen.
Real men fight men. They don't go
after helpless women.
What is wrong with you?
Who are you? You're trying
to form street, right?
No problem. Let me introduce myself.
My name is Funmilade Fadegera
Oguntamu, the great urchin of Mushin.
Mushin Olosa!
If you misbehave, I'll deal with you.
I will cut your neck. Are you mad?
What do you want?
I said, what do you want?
I don't want any problem.
I'm just here to collect my money.
She owes me.
- You came to collect your money.
- Yes.
That's why you're
harassing her? How much is it?
- Four point eight million.
- Four point eight million?
- And ten percent interest.
- Four point eight million?
That's why why you're laying
your hands on a woman. Right?
Men like you are the reason
why man are called dogs.
Okay. Let me ask you,
do you have a sister?
- Yes, sir.
- You have a sister?
If someone does this
to your sister, will you like it?
No, sir.
Are you okay?
- Take it.
- Sir?
I said take it. Don't you want your money?
Put your account number there.
Here, sir.
Very good. Check your phone.
I can't believe it.
- You've seen it, right?
- Yes, sir.
Now listen, I don't want
to see your legs in this house anymore.
I don't want to see your legs here
or see you around this compound.
Do you understand?
Now, stand up and get out.
Get out! Hey!
You want to leave just like that?
Is that how it's done?
You just want to leave?
You don't know
what you're supposed to do, right?
Aunty, I'm sorry.
Aunty, don't be offended.
I didn't know. This brother
has explained it.
I know the right thing now. I'm sorry.
I'm not like that. I'm very sorry, ma.
Now get out. Get out! Idiot.
Ogaranya.
- Are you okay?
- Yes.
Sit down.
Funmilade.
Thank you so much.
Why are you thanking me?
First... you took care of Ben.
And now... you've taken care of Gabby.
Even when you didn't have to.
Thank you so much. You don't know
the burden that
you've lifted off my shoulders.
Not many friends will do this.
Not even a family member.
And I'm grateful.
There's no problem. See...
that's how it is in our family.
We're very kind people.
We're generous.
Looking at you, one would
never imagine that you have...
such kindness in your heart.
Especially towards women.
Ah-ah. Hold on.
See, okay. Let me explain it to you.
As for the family I come from...
I'm the only male child
my mother gave birth to.
I grew up with girls.
All of them depend on me
to save them whenever anything happens.
And I have never let them down.
Do you understand? Because
Anytime I see women,
they always look like queens.
Do you get? No man in this world
should make a woman to be scared of him.
Not to talk of beating her.
I can't be okay with it.
Except I'm not there.
What I did is a very...
normal thing I was supposed to do.
Don't worry. It's normal.
Catholic, don't worry
we're together. Ogaranya.
We're together. It's a small thing.
- Don't worry.
- Thank you.
You're welcome. Don't worry.
But, Catherine, don't be offended.
I want to ask you a question.
I've been thinking. What made you
take a loan from that kind of person?
My dad.
He was sick.
He had kidney failure.
So, we spent a lot of money.
We needed a lot of money
for his treatment.
Dialysis and all.
I sold everything I had that had value.
Then they talked about a transplant.
I needed money for the surgery and...
I had no one to go to.
Someone then introduced me to Gabby.
Gabby gave me the money but...
after the surgery...
he passed. He couldn't make it.
The one I had left,
I had to use it for the burial.
So...
I just need a little bit of time but...
well, that's it.
I'm sorry.
So, even the money that I paid
for rent here, you gave it to him?
Actually, that's why you're here.
Well, but... at least
that one is over now. He won't...
disturb you again, right?
- Sorry.
- Funmilade, thank you so much.
Stop thanking me.
You will exhaust your thanks.
I've told you not to worry.
What's wrong with you? Don't worry.
Get yourself something to eat.
Thank you.
Eh...
I was going to ask you,
I haven't seen your girlfriend in a while.
Is she okay? Did she travel?
Tega? Does Tega
look like someone that can travel?
I just told her that we should
take a break for now, please.
Why? Did she serve you breakfast?
Breakfast? Can someone serve me breakfast?
Is she crazy?
One who attended an all-night party
doesn't eat breakfast. Don't you know?
So what happened?
See, the issue is a very long one.
She was annoyed I went
to beat Ben at his house because of you.
I tried explaining to her
that this is what happened. But...
she was not ready to listen. I felt like...
she's not mature enough
for her to think like.
I can't be with that
kind of person. But that's not
why I told her to stay away.
She slapped me.
In situations like that,
you know I don't beat women.
For her to have slapped me, it's better
to break a relationship than marriage.
Do you get?
About marriage, were
you planning to marry her?
Yes.
Tega and I have been together
for a very long time.
But I didn't tell her.
If not, she will feel elated.
It's better the way I saw her true color.
Funmi, if you really loved her, are you
telling me that you couldn't forgive
an ordinary slap?
Nothing is ordinary about a slap.
Domestic violence starts from slap.
- And you don't subscribe to violence.
- Yes.
That's very shocking.
I'm sorry but your entire being
reeks of violence.
- Ah-ah.
- Well, it seems that way.
Look, what...
I'm not a violent person.
I'm a gentle guy.
Don't look at me that way.
Welcome.
Wow.
What's going on here?
Food competition.
The first person to finish their food
without a fork, knife or spoon...
will win 20,000 naira.
So how easy is it to eat without a fork?
With your mouth.
- Really?
- Yes.
- Okay.
- Are you ready?
- I'm ready. Let me see.
- Are you sure?
- I'm sure.
- Don't worry, it's complete.
What's there? Do you underestimate me?
Bring this food, let me finish it.
- Really? A posh lady like you? Sure?
- I will shock you.
Alright, there's no problem.
A flamingo acting like wild animal.
- Are we to use our mouths?
- Yes.
Okay.
- At the count of three.
- Hold on.
- Are you ready?
- I'm ready.
- I'll count one to three.
- Okay.
Alright, let's go. One!
- Two!
- Hold on.
Two and half!
- Wait, calm down. I've not said three.
- I'm trying to pack my hair.
Okay.
And...
three!
- Please.
- What do you think about my friend?
Is it Catherine? Well...
she's a good person
if she uses her medication.
Really? So you guys
can relate well now? Right?
We're trying. Both of us
are not on the same level.
We are like water and kerosene.
We can never mix.
- Her ways aren't same with mine.
- I don't believe you.
- How do you mean you don't believe me?
- I don't believe you.
Look, did she tell you anything?
No.
- Are you sure?
- When did you start speaking English?
Please, stop it. Don't I normally
speak English? Am I not educated?
Please forget it. Are you sure
she didn't say anything?
No, actually.
What did you bring for me?
Why did come empty handed?
I don't understand what's wrong with you.
What kind of bed sheet is this?
Were you told Ben Ten is coming here?
Despite the huge amount I paid.
What is this?
Oh God.
What is it?
What is the problem?
- Is your brain paining you?
- I'd have broken your head.
You'll break my head?
This is not going to work. It won't work.
So please, just get your things,
get yourself up, and leave my house.
Funmi, happy birthday to who?!
- Are you mad?
- Calm down!
God will punish you.
Alright, stop that. Are you mad?
Do you want something?
- Do you want something?
- No.
Okay.
- You go first.
- Alright.
Catherine.
See, I have plenty things to say.
But I have to let you know that...
I came to Lagos so...
I could leave this country.
But since I came into this house...
I know that I've frustrated you so much.
I know that I've disturbed you.
I'm always happy when I frustrate you.
But I don't mean it in a bad way.
But I need to let you that...
you're a good person.
Because, another person
would have kicked me out the house
with the way I disturbed you.
But you didn't throw me out.
You still tolerated me.
I need to let you know
you're a good person.
And I appreciate that.
See... I think I like you.
I like you too.
Actually, I like you a lot.
I was...
when you came to my house,
it was a disaster.
I didn't want you anywhere around.
But this... short period that
we've been together
has opened me up to a side of you
that I didn't know existed.
And... getting to know you I...
can't believe the kind of heart you have.
Doesn't look anything like your actions.
- Wait.
- I'm serious.
You've given me peace. I've never felt...
as protected as I feel right now.
You provided for me.
You're amazing.
I wouldn't want it to stop.
But you know I'm not normal.
I know.
- I know.
- You know I'm crazy.
Abnormal is the new normal so it's fine.
So you don't mind?
Do you think we should take this further?
Yes.
- Yay!
- Oh my God. This guy, stop.
Ogaranya!
Not that way. This way.
I'll deal with you tonight.
- How did it go?
- Yes.
Canada, here I come!
Oh my God!
- Funmi, they gave you?
- Yes!
- Yes! They gave me.
- Wow!
- They dare not, I swear.
- Let me see.
Check it out. They're dead.
- Canada boy!
- Wait, where is it?
Yo fam.
- Oh!
- It's here. Look at it.
Aw.
Yay!
- Ogaranya!
- Ogaranya!
- But they didn't see my boy like this.
- Oh. That's true.
No problem. I will comport myself. Yo fam.
- I'm here with my baby.
- Hello.
- I'm here with Catherine.
- No. I will change my name when I travel.
- Really?
- Yeah.
- What will you change it to?
- Uh...
I don't know.
- I will give you a name.
- No. thank you.
Let me give you the name now.
It will suit you. Like, Suliya.
Subtitle Translation by: Uchenna Ezekwere