Alice in Wonderland (1933) Movie Script
May I go out now,
Miss Simpson?
Has it stopped snowing?
Not quite.
If it has stopped
when your sister returns,
perhaps she will
take you out.
Oh, dear.
Here, kitty.
Suppose it never stops.
Suppose the man in charge of the
snow has forgotten how to stop it.
Don't you think you had better
work a while at your sampler?
No, thank you.
Oh, dear.
Hello, Sir Turtle.
You really must stop that,
Your Majesty. Stop it, I say!
Stop what?
The White Queen just
knocked over the White King.
She never does look
where she's going.
Alice, you know you are not supposed
to play with your father's chessmen.
But I wasn't playing.
She deliberately bumped into His
Majesty and knocked him off his feet.
Alice, are you sure
that that is true?
Well, I saw it.
Alice.
Yes, Miss Simpson.
At any rate, Your Majesty,
stop bumping into your husband.
And you might tidy up a bit.
A white rabbit!
All dressed up in a muffler and
overcoat and big woolly shoes.
There. It's gone into
its nice warm rabbit hole.
It looked so funny
all dressed up.
Alice, I am sure you know that
there is no such thing as a rabbit
dressed up in a muffler
and an overcoat.
You must not say
what is not true.
Well, it...
It wasn't untrue exactly.
I think you had better
finish your tea.
There is another
egg for you to eat.
I did eat both eggs, but I put one
of them all back together again.
Alice!
Yes, Miss Simpson.
The looking-glass room.
You see, Dinah,
as soon as I hold you up,
the little girl in
the looking-glass room
holds up another
cat just like you.
Oh, Dinah, wouldn't you
like to see
what the looking-glass
house is like?
You know, Dinah, there
is a looking-glass house.
First, there's the room
you can see through the glass.
That's just the same
as our sitting room,
only the things
go the other way.
You'd love living there.
But, of course, I don't know whether
looking-glass milk is good to drink.
Well, anyway, then we would
come to the hallway.
It is very like our own
hallway as far as you can see,
only it may be quite
different beyond that.
Oh, Dinah,
wouldn't it be nice
if we could get through to...
I can see all of the looking-glass
room from here, all but a bit.
I would so like to see that little
bit just behind the fireplace.
Do you think, Dinah, that
if I pressed very, very hard
and tried to look straight
down, that I might...
Why, why...
Well, I knew this part of
the room would be different.
But I do wish the looking-glass
chair had moved when I moved ours.
There seems no other way.
If I could only fall
like that all the time!
Can't be English.
Of course.
It's the looking-glass room.
Why, it's Uncle and Aunt!
I knew that if you could
really get behind a picture,
you'd see the backs of people.
Poor Uncle Gilbert.
His trousers are all patched.
My dear niece, how would
you like being framed
in one pair of trousers for
20 years without being patched?
It must be very difficult.
It is.
But after all, it's only the front
of a picture that counts, really.
Of course.
That is all.
8:00.
What did you say?
8:00.
But your hands say
20 minutes to 4:00.
I never let my left hand know
what my right hand is doing.
This side of the looking
glass has me all confused.
That's because everything
is backward on your side.
Why, I...
I never...
Mama! Mama! Mama!
Mama! Mama!
What's that?
It's the voice of my child!
Your child!
Oh, my precious lily!
My imperial kitten!
I must be
with my child.
Let me help you.
Mama! Mama!
Dear me.
There, there,
my royal pawn.
Poor thing.
Watch out for the volcano.
It blew me up! Be sure you
come up the regular way.
Don't get blown up.
You'll be hours and hours
getting to the table at that rate.
I'd far better help you.
No, no!
The King's men! Somebody
call out the King's men!
I assure you, my dear, I shall never,
never forget the horror of this moment.
Well, you will forget, unless
you make a memorandum of it.
I shall be very
happy to remind you.
We will not be
reminded by a volcano.
I'm not a volcano, and
I'm not a cyclone, either.
Then you're either
a cyclano or a volcone.
And...
Well, what time
was that?
I really haven't any idea,
but it's very late.
I must hurry or I shall have to
go back through the looking glass
before I've seen what the
rest of the house is like.
My, what a strange way
to walk about the garden.
The Duchess! The Duchess! Won't she
be savage if I've kept her waiting!
Oh, dear! Oh, dear!
I shall be too late!
My ears and whiskers,
how late it is getting!
Well, after such
a fall as this,
I shall think nothing
of tumbling downstairs.
I wish Dinah were here.
That's such pretty music.
Oh, dear.
Ouch.
Goodbye, dear feet.
Oh, will I ever get to
the beautiful garden?
Oh!
Oh, Mouse!
Do you know the way
out of this pool, oh, Mouse?
I'm very tired of
swimming about here.
Perhaps you don't
understand English.
I daresay you're
a French mouse.
That's French for,
"Where is my cat?"
I beg your pardon. I quite
forgot you didn't like cats.
Wait, oh, Mouse!
Oh, Mouse!
Not like cats?
Would you like cats
if you were me?
Don't be angry. I wish I
could show you our cat Dinah.
You'd take quite
a fancy to her.
She's such a dear, quiet thing,
and so good at catching mice.
Oh, I beg your pardon.
I hate you!
I hate cats!
My whole family hates cats.
Nasty, low, vulgar things!
Oh, dear!
Wait, oh, Mouse!
Cats! Cats!
Cats!
William the Conqueror, whose
cause was favored by the pope,
was soon submitted to by the
English, who wanted leaders,
and had been of late much accustomed
to usurpation and conquest.
Who are you, please?
I am a dodo.
How do you do?
My name is Alice.
And you are very wet.
I'm afraid I am, but there isn't
much I can do about getting dry.
History is the driest
thing I know.
Shall we dry you
with history?
I'd be much obliged
if you could.
Listen well.
Edwin and Morcar,
the earls of
Mercia and Northumbria,
found it advisable
to go with Edgar Aetheling
to meet William and
offer him the crown.
William's conduct at
first was moderate,
but the insolence
of his Normans...
How are you
getting on, my dear?
Beautifully, thank you.
Shall I put you
to sleep now?
No, thank you!
Then you'd best run along.
I'm about to
recite some dates.
Yes, sir.
Thank you. Goodbye.
1585, Shakespeare was born,
1616, Shakespeare died...
Who are you?
I hardly know, sir,
just at present.
At least, I know who I was
when I got up this morning,
but I must have changed
several times since then.
What do you mean by that?
Explain yourself.
I can't explain myself,
because I'm not myself, you see.
I don't see!
I can't put it
more clearly,
for I can't understand it
myself to begin with.
And being so many different
sizes in one day is confusing.
It isn't.
Well, when some day
you turn into a chrysalis,
and after that
into a butterfly,
you'll find it
a bit queer, won't you?
Not a bit!
Well, maybe you wouldn't, but it
would certainly feel very queer to me.
You? Who are you?
I think you ought to tell me
who you are first.
Why?
Good day, sir.
Come back. I have
something important to say.
Yes?
Keep your temper.
Is that all?
No.
So you think you've changed, do you?
I'm afraid I have, sir.
What size do you
want to be?
I should like to be a little
larger, sir, if you wouldn't mind.
Three inches is such
a horrid height to be.
I am three inches high! It's
a very good height to be!
I'm sure it must be, sir, but
you see, I'm not used to it.
You'll get used
to it in time.
One side will
make you grow taller.
The other side will
make you grow shorter.
One side of...
Of what?
The mushroom.
Which side will
make me grow larger?
The large-making side,
of course.
I'll take a little
of both to make sure.
Oh, dear, now I'm too
big again, oh, Caterpillar.
Mr. Caterpillar,
sir, where are you?
Whoever lives here, it would never
do to come upon them this size.
Why, I should frighten them
out of their wits.
For the Duchess.
An invitation from the Queen
to play croquet.
My compliments to the Queen.
My compliments
to the Duchess.
There's no sort of
use in your knocking.
Please, sir,
how am I to get in?
I shall sit here
till tomorrow.
I'm sorry you were hit,
but how am I to get in?
I shall sit here
for days and days.
But what am I to do?
Anything you like.
Please watch
out for the baby!
She nearly killed
the poor little thing.
If everybody minded
their own business,
the world would go round
much faster than it does.
Speak roughly to your little
boy And beat him when he sneezes
He only does it to annoy
Because he knows it teases
Wow! Wow! Wow!
Wow!
Wow!
Wow!
He only does it to annoy
Because he knows it teases
Here, you can nurse
it a bit if you like.
Now, I must go and get ready
to play croquet with the Queen.
Don't grunt. That's not at all a
proper way of expressing yourself.
What am I going to do with this
creature when I get it home?
If you're going to
turn into a pig, my dear,
I'll have nothing more
to do with you. Mind now!
There's no mistake about
you now. You're a pig!
You would have grown up to
be a dreadfully ugly child,
but you do make a handsome pig, I think.
Why do you grin, oh, cat?
Because I'm a Cheshire Cat, that's why.
Well, then,
Cheshire puss,
would you tell me, please, which
way I ought to go from here?
That depends a good deal
on where you want to get to.
I don't care much where.
Then it doesn't matter
which way you go.
So long as
I get somewhere.
You're sure to do that,
if you only walk long enough.
Do you play croquet
with the Queen today?
I should like it very much,
but I haven't been invited yet.
You'll see me there.
Must you go so soon?
By the by, what became
of the baby?
I'd nearly forgotten to ask.
It turned into a pig.
I thought it would.
Did you say pig or fig?
I said pig
and I wish you wouldn't keep
appearing and vanishing so suddenly.
You make one quite giddy.
All right.
Don't you wish
you could do this?
Well, I've often seen a cat without
a grin, but a grin without a cat?
No room! No room!
No room! No room!
There's plenty of room!
Have some wine?
I don't see any wine.
There isn't any.
It wasn't very civil
of you to offer it.
Your hair needs cutting.
You should not make personal
remarks. It's very rude.
Why is a raven
like a writing desk?
I believe I can
answer that.
Do you mean you can
find the answer to it?
Exactly so.
You should say
what you mean.
What day of
the month is it?
Fourth.
Ah! Two days wrong.
I told you that butter
wouldn't suit the works.
Oh!
Some crumbs must
have got in it as well.
Hmm. I put it in
with a bread knife.
It was the best butter,
you know.
What a funny watch! It
tells the days of the month,
but doesn't tell
what "o'clock" it is.
Have you guessed
the riddle yet?
Why... Why, no. I give it up.
What is the answer?
I haven't the slightest idea!
Nor I!
I think you might do
something better with time
than wasting it asking a lot
of riddles that have no answers.
Don't you speak about Time. I daresay
you've never even spoken to him.
Perhaps not.
Time and I quarreled
last March,
just before he went
mad, you know.
It was at a great concert
given by the Queen of Hearts,
and I had to sing, "Twinkle, twinkle,
little bat How I wonder what you're at"
You know the song,
perhaps?
I've heard
something like it.
It goes on,
you know, like this.
Twinkle, twinkle, little bat
How I wonder what you're at
Up above the world you fly
Like a tea tray in the sky
Up above the world you fly
Like a tea tray in the sky
Twinkle, twinkle, twinkle...
Twinkle, twinkle, little bat
How I wonder what you're at
Up above the world you fly
Like a tea tray in the sky
Up above the world you fly
Like a tea tray in the sky
Twinkle, twinkle,
twinkle, twinkle
Twinkle, twinkle...
Well, I'd hardly finished the
first verse when the Queen bawled,
"He's murdering the Time!
Off with his head!"
And ever since that,
he won't do a thing I ask.
It's always 6:00 now.
Is that why all the
tea things are out here?
Yes, that's it.
It's always teatime,
and we have no time
to wash the tea
things in between.
Take some more tea.
I haven't had any yet,
so I can't take more.
You mean you can't take less. It is
very easy to take more than nothing.
I want a clean cup.
It's the stupidest tea party
I ever was at in all my life!
Very curious!
Would you please tell me why
are you painting those roses?
I...
Well, as a matter
of fact, Miss,
this tree should have
been a red rose tree
and we put in
a white one by mistake,
and if the Queen
should find out,
we'll all have
our heads cut off.
So, you see, Miss,
we're doing our best
before she comes
back to paint...
The Queen!
The Queen!
The Queen!
Come, come, get up!
Her Majesty,
the Queen of Hearts.
Her Majesty,
the Queen!
Off with his head!
Off with his head!
What is your name, child?
My name is Alice,
so please Your Majesty.
Off with her head!
Off with her head!
Nonsense!
Off with her head!
Off with her head!
Consider, my dear.
She's only a child.
Off with her head!
Off with her head!
And besides, this is
the executioners' day off.
It is, is it? Well, they shall
lose their heads for this!
Can you play croquet?
Yes.
Then let the game
begin at once.
Hurry! Hurry! Hurry! Hurry!
Must I behead you all?
Here, take it. Play.
Off with some heads.
You're pointing
the wrong way for a mallet!
Pardon me. My back hurts.
Well!
Don't look at me.
I'm as mixed up as you are!
This game's slowing up.
Off with some heads!
Where are my victims?
Search the hedges.
Thrash the bushes.
Shake the trees!
How glad I am to see you
again, you dear old thing.
How did you like
your game?
Well, it was very exciting.
Of course it is.
And the moral of that is,
"Be what you
would like to be."
Or, to put it more simply, "Never
imagine yourself not to be otherwise
"than what it might appear to others
that what you were or might have been
"wasn't otherwise
than what you had been
"would have appeared
to them to be otherwise."
I should understand that
better if it were written down.
I can't quite follow it
as you say it.
That's nothing to what
I could say, if I chose.
And the moral
of that is...
It's a fine day,
Your Majesty.
I give you fair warning. Either you
or your head must be off at once!
Please, Your Majesty,
could you make it go away?
Queen! Queen!
Where are you, Queen?
What fun!
What is the fun?
The Queen.
They never really execute
anybody she condemns, you know.
The King...
The King pardons everybody.
I'm very happy to
know that, I'm sure.
Have you seen
the Mock Turtle yet?
Why... Why, no. I don't even
know what a Mock Turtle is.
It's what mock turtle
soup's made from.
Come here, will you,
Mock Turtle, old thing?
What is his sorrow?
It's all his fancy.
He hasn't got no sorrow.
No sorrow, indeed.
Mine are the sorrows
of a sorrowful sorrow.
Mine are the woes
of a woeful woe.
Mine are the...
This here young lady,
she wants for to know
your history, she do.
I'll tell it her.
Sit down, both of you, and don't
speak a word till I've finished.
Once I was a real turtle.
Oh, dear!
Oh, dear!
When we were little,
we went to school in the sea.
The master was an old turtle.
We used to call him Tortoise.
Why did you call him
Tortoise if he wasn't one?
We called him Tortoise
because he taught us.
You ought to be ashamed of yourself
for asking such a simple question.
We went to school in the sea,
though you mayn't believe it.
I never said I didn't. You did.
Hold your tongue!
We had the best
of educations.
In fact, we went to
school every day.
I've been to
a day school, too.
We learned
French and music.
I only took
the regular course.
What was that?
Reeling and writhing
to begin with.
And then the different
branches of arithmetic,
ambition, distraction,
uglification and derision.
And how many hours a day
did you do lessons?
Ten hours the first day
and nine the next and so on.
That's why
they're called lessons,
because they lessen
from day to day.
Then the 11th day
must have been a holiday.
Of course.
And how did you
manage on the 12th day?
Well, that's enough
about lessons.
Shall we play games,
or shall the Mock Turtle sing?
Oh, a song, please, if the
Mock Turtle would be so kind.
No accounting for tastes.
Sing her Turtle Soup,
will you, old fellow?
In a moment.
Beautiful soup
Who cares for fish
Game, or any other dish?
Who would not give
all else for two
Pennyworth only
of beautiful soup?
Pennyworth only
of beautiful soup
Beautiful soup,
beautiful soup
Soup of the evening
Beautiful soup, beautiful...
Faster! Faster!
Faster! Faster!
Faster! Much faster!
Are we nearly there?
Nearly there?
Why, we passed it
10 minutes ago. Faster!
It's all marked out
like a chessboard.
Of course
it's a chessboard,
and life is a chessboard,
and you are a Queen's pawn.
You will go immediately
to the fourth square,
which you should reach
in exactly no time.
Did you remark something?
I didn't know I had
to make one just then.
You should have told me how kind
it is of me to tell you all this.
No questions? Very well, then, no answers.
Open your mouth wide when you
speak, and always speak in French
if you can't think of
the English for something.
Turn out your
toes as you walk
and always say "Your
Majesty," and so forth.
If you think we're waxworks,
you ought to pay, you know.
Waxworks weren't made to be
looked at for nothing, nohow.
Contrary-wise, if you think
we're alive, you ought to speak.
I'm sure I'm very sorry.
I was wondering which is the
best way out of this wood.
Would you tell me, please?
You've begun wrong.
The first thing in
a visit is to say,
"How do you do?"
And shake hands.
I hope you're
not much tired.
Why, nohow, but thank you
very much for asking.
So much obliged.
You like poetry?
Yes, pretty well.
Some poetry.
But would you tell me first
which road leads out of the woods?
What shall I repeat to her?
The Walrus and the
Carpenter is the longest.
"The sun was shining on the
sea Shining with all his might
"He did his very best to make
The billows smooth and bright
"And this was odd because it
was The middle of the night
"The Walrus and the Carpenter
Were walking close at hand
"They wept like anything to
see Such quantities of sand
"'lf this were only cleared away'
They said, 'it would be grand'
"'lf seven maids with seven
mops Swept it for half a year
"'Do you suppose,'
the Walrus said
"'That they could
get it clear?"'
"'I doubt it,' said the
Carpenter And shed a bitter tear"
"'Oh, oyster, come and walk
with us, ' The Walrus did beseech
"'A pleasant walk, a pleasant
talk Along the briny beach'
"They could not do with more
than four To give a hand to each
"The eldest oyster looked at
him But never a word he said
"The eldest oyster winked his
eye And shook his heavy head
"Meaning to say he did not
choose To leave the oyster bed
"But younger oysters hurried
up All eager for the treat
"Their coats were brushed
Their faces washed
"Their shoes
were clean and neat
"And this was odd because,
you know They hadn't any feet
"'The time has come,' the Walrus
said 'To talk of many things
"'Of shoes and ships and sealing
wax Of cabbages and kings"
"'And why the sea is boiling
hot And whether pigs have wings"'
"'A loaf of bread,' the Walrus
said 'ls what we chiefly need
"'Pepper and vinegar besides
Are very good indeed
"'Now, if you're ready, oysters
dear We can begin to feed'
"'But not on us, ' the oysters
cried Turning a little blue
"'After such kindness that
would be A dismal thing to do!'
"'The night is fine,' the Walrus
said 'Do you admire the view?'
"'I weep for you,' the Walrus
said 'I deeply sympathize'
"With sobs and tears he sorted
out Those of the largest size
"Holding his pocket handkerchief
Before his streaming eyes
"'Oh, oyster,' said the Carpenter
'You've had a pleasant run
"'Shall we be trotting home
again?' But answer came there none
"And this was scarcely odd
because They'd eaten every one"
Well, they were both
very unpleasant characters.
But at any rate, I'd
better be leaving the wood
because it's really getting
very dark. Well, goodbye.
Look!
Do you see that?
It's only a rattle.
Only an old rattle,
quite old and broken.
I knew it was.
It's spoiled, of course.
My nice new rattle.
Of course, you agree
to have a battle?
I suppose so.
Only she must help us
to dress up, you know.
Of course!
"Tweedledee and Tweedledum
Agreed to have a battle
"For Tweedledee
said Tweedledum
"Had spoiled his
nice new rattle
"Just then down flew a monstrous
crow As black as a tar barrel
"Which frightened
both the heroes so
"They quite
forgot their quarrel"
I hope you're good at
pinning and tying string.
All this has got to
go on somehow or other.
This is to keep my head
from being cut off.
You know, one of the most serious
things that can happen to one in a battle
is to get one's head cut off.
Do I look very pale?
Well, yes, a little.
I'm very brave generally,
only today I happen
to have a headache.
Well, I've got a toothache.
I'm far worse than you.
Then you'd both
better not fight today.
We must have
a bit of a fight.
Let's fight till 6:00
and then have dinner.
There's only one sword, but you
can have the umbrella. It's sharper.
Only we must begin quick.
It's getting very, very dark.
And darker and darker.
What a thick black cloud that
is, and how fast it comes!
Why, I do believe
it's got wings.
It's the crow!
The crow!
May I put your
shawl straight for you?
I don't know what's
the matter with it.
It's out of temper, I think.
I've pinned it here and I've pinned
it there, but there's no pleasing it.
It can't go on
straight, you know,
if you put all
the pins on one side.
And dear me, what a state your hair is in!
Oh, the brush has got
entangled in it.
And I lost
the comb yesterday.
There, now you
look better.
My finger's bleeding.
What's the matter?
Have you pricked your finger?
I haven't pricked it yet,
but I soon shall.
When do you expect
to do it?
When I fasten my shawl again,
the broach will come undone.
Watch out, you're holding it all wrong.
Now you understand
the way things happen here.
But why don't you
scream now?
Why, I've done all
the screaming already.
Now, what would be the good
of doing it all over again?
I suppose so.
Well, it's a bit lighter now.
I'm glad that crow is gone.
I hope your
finger's better now.
Much better. Better, better,
better.
What is it
you want to buy?
I should like to
buy an egg, please.
I never put things
into people's hands.
That would never do.
You must get it
for yourself.
What a strange egg!
It keeps growing much faster than
it should! Curiouser and curiouser!
It's bigger
than a chicken!
Why, it's...
It's Humpty-Dumpty!
Don't stand there staring
at me as if I were an egg.
Tell me your name
and your business.
My name is Alice.
It's a stupid enough name.
What does it mean?
Must a name
mean something?
Of course it must.
My name means the shape I am,
and a right handsome
shape it is.
With your name,
you might be any shape.
Why do you sit
out here all alone?
Because there's
nobody with me.
Did you think
I couldn't answer that?
Ask another.
Don't you think you'd
be safer on the ground?
That wall is
so very narrow.
Of course I don't think so.
Why, if I ever did fall off,
which there's no
chance of, but if I did...
If I did fall,
the King has promised me...
To send all his horses
and all his men.
Ah, so, you know. All his
horses and all his men.
They'd pick me up again
in a minute, they would.
However, this conversation
is going on a little too fast.
Let's go back to
the last remark but one.
I'm afraid I can't
quite remember it.
In that case,
we start afresh,
and it's my turn
to choose a subject.
How old did you
say you were?
Twelve years
and four months.
Wrong. You never
said a word like it.
I thought you meant,
"How old are you?"
If I'd meant that,
I'd have said that.
Twelve years and four months.
An uncomfortable sort of age.
Now, my advice would have been to
leave off at 12, but it's too late now.
What a beautiful belt!
Or is it a beautiful collar?
It is a most provoking thing when a
person doesn't know a collar from a belt.
I know it's very
ignorant of me.
It's a collar, child, and
a beautiful one, as you say.
It's a present from
the White King and Queen.
Is it really?
They gave it to me
for an un-birthday present.
I beg your pardon?
I am not offended, and it
isn't respectable to beg.
I mean, what is
an un-birthday present?
A present given when it isn't
your birthday, of course.
I like birthday
presents best.
You don't know what
you're talking about.
How many days are
there in a year?
Three hundred
and sixty-five.
And how many
birthdays have you?
One.
And if you take that
from 365, what remains?
Three hundred and
sixty-four, of course.
Well then, there are 364 days when
you might get un-birthday presents.
Certainly.
And only one for
birthday presents.
That's glory for you!
I don't know what
you mean by glory.
Of course you don't,
till I tell you.
I meant there's a nice
knock-down argument for you.
But glory doesn't
mean that.
When I use a word, it means
what I choose it to mean,
neither more or less.
The question is whether you can
make words mean different things.
The question is, which is to be the
master, you or the word? That's all.
However, I can manage
the whole lot.
Impenetrability,
that's what I say.
Would you tell me,
please, what that means?
I meant by impenetrability that
we've had enough of the subject,
and it would be
just as well
if you would mention what
you mean to do next,
as I suppose you don't mean to
stop here all the rest of your life.
Fancy it meaning all that.
You seem very clever at
explaining words, sir.
Would you kindly tell me the
meaning of a poem called Jabberwocky?
I read it a long time ago.
I can, but I won't.
That's all. Goodbye.
Goodbye,
till we meet again.
I shouldn't know you
if we did meet.
You're so exactly
like other people.
The face is what
one generally goes by.
That's just it. Your face
is the same as everybody's.
The two eyes, so.
Nose in the middle,
mouth under.
Now, if your two eyes were
on the same side of your nose,
or your mouth on the top,
that would be some help.
It wouldn't look nice.
Wait till you've tried.
Watch out!
Help! Help! I'm falling!
Tell the King!
Tell him to bring
his horses and his men!
Help!
What happened?
We ran into each other,
Your Majesty.
Good. I rather fancied
something like that had happened.
Oh, Your Majesty,
Humpty-Dumpty fell off the wall!
I know, I know.
Four-thousand, two-hundred and
seven of my soldiers are on the way.
Two without horses.
If all this King's
horses and men
can't put him back
together again, nobody can.
I'm glad Humpty will be
all right. I was worried.
Well, don't be.
Look along the road
and tell me
if you can see either of
my three messengers.
I see nobody on the road.
Oh, I only wish
I had such eyes!
To be able to see nobody,
and at that distance!
Oh!
It's too, too bad!
Can I help you, sir?
On or off?
You are on.
In a short time
I shall be off again.
I'm so sorry. Are you the King's messenger?
I am the White Knight.
I see you're admiring
my little box.
It's my own invention, to
keep clothes and sandwiches in.
You see, I carry it upside
down so the rain can't come in.
But the things can get out.
Do you know the lid is open?
Then if all the things
have fallen out,
the box is no use
without them.
Can you guess
why I did that?
I can't imagine.
In hopes some bees may make a nest
in it. Then I should get the honey.
But you've got a beehive, or something
like one, fastened to the saddle.
It's a very good beehive, too.
One of the best kind,
but not a single bee
has come near it yet.
That other thing's
a mousetrap.
I suppose the mice
keep the bees out
or the bees keep the mice
out. I don't know which.
It isn't very likely there would
be any mice on a horse's back.
Not very likely, perhaps,
but I don't choose to have
them running all about.
You see, I'm well
provided for everything.
That's the reason the horse has
those anklets around his feet.
What are they for?
To guard against the bites of
sharks. It's my own invention.
But let's go on. I'll go with
you to the edge of the wood.
I hope you've got your
hair well-fastened on.
Only the usual way.
That's hardly enough. You see,
the wind is so strong here.
It's strong as soup.
Have you invented
a plan for keeping
the hair from
being blown off?
Not yet,
but I have a plan for keeping
the hair from falling off.
I should like to
hear it very much.
First, you take
an upright stick,
then you make your hair
creep up it like a vine.
Now, the reason hair falls off
is because it hangs down.
Things never fall upward, you
know. It's my own invention.
You may try it if you like.
I'm a great hand
at inventing things.
Now, I daresay you noticed
the last time you picked me up,
I was looking
rather thoughtful.
You were a little grave.
Well, just then I was inventing
a new way of getting over a gate.
Would you like to hear it?
Very much, indeed.
Well, I'll tell you how I came
to think of it. I said to myself,
"The only difficulty
is with the feet.
"The head's high
enough already."
Now, first I put my head on top of
the gate, then my head's high enough,
then I stand on my head,
then my feet are high enough.
Then I'm over.
Sir Knight!
If there were only
a gate down here,
I'd be in excellent
position to cross it.
How can you go on talking so
quietly with your head in a ditch?
What does it matter
where my body happens to be?
My mind goes on
working all the same.
In fact, I once invented a new
pudding during the meat course.
In time to have it cooked
for the next course? Hmm.
That was quick work.
Well, not the next course.
In fact, I don't believe
that pudding ever was cooked.
What did you mean
it to be made of?
Well, it began
with blotting paper.
That wouldn't be
very nice, I'm afraid.
Not very nice alone, but
imagine how good it would be
mixed with other things, such
as gunpowder and sealing wax.
And here I must leave you.
This is the end of the wood.
You've only
a few yards to go.
Down the hill, across that little
brook, and then you'll be a queen.
At last!
But you'll stay
and see me off first?
I shan't be long.
You'll wait?
Of course I'll wait.
I think it'll encourage me.
Thank you very much for
coming so far out of your way.
For that, I shall expect you
to cry a good deal as I go.
The poor, dear Knight.
He's the nicest person yet.
Well, here I am.
What's this?
A crown! A golden crown!
I'm a queen!
I'm a queen!
How dare you say
that you're a queen.
What right have you
to call yourself so?
You can't be a queen,
you know,
till you've passed
the proper examination,
and the sooner we begin
it, the better. Be seated.
Yes, Your Majesty.
I'm ready, Your Majesties.
Can you do addition?
Now what's one and one and one and
one and one and one, one and one?
I don't know.
I lost count.
She can't do addition.
Can you answer any useful
questions? How is bread made?
I know that.
You take some flour...
Where do you pick the flower,
in a garden or in the hedges?
It isn't picked at all,
it's ground.
But how many
acres of ground?
I wish you wouldn't leave out
so many things!
Oh, dear.
You know any languages?
What's the French
for "fiddle-de-dee"?
Fiddle-de-dee's
not English.
Whoever said it was?
Well, if you'll tell me what
language fiddle-de-dee is,
I'll tell you
the French for it.
Queens never
make bargains!
I'm so sleepy.
She's tired,
poor thing.
So, smooth her hair,
lend her your nightcap and
sing her a soothing lullaby.
I haven't any nightcap, and I
don't know any soothing lullabies.
I'll have to
do it myself.
Hush-a-bye lady
in Alice's lap
When the feast's ready
we've time for a nap
When the feast's over
we'll go to the ball
Red Queen and White Queen
and Alice and all
Now that you know the words, sing
it through to me. I'm sleepy, too.
Now what am I to do?
Do wake up.
To the looking-glass world
It was Alice that said
"I've a scepter in hand
"I've a crown on my head"
No admittance
until week after next.
Why... Why, how dare you!
Fill up the glasses
as quick as you can
And sprinkle the table
With buttons and bran
Put cats in the coffee
and mice in the tea
And welcome Queen Alice
with 30 times three
Put cats in the coffee
and mice in the tea
And welcome Queen Alice
With 30 times three
Then put in the glasses,
molasses and ink
And anything else
that is pleasant to drink
Mix sand with the cider
And wool with the wine
And welcome Queen Alice
With 90 times nine
Mix sand with the cider
And wool with the wine
And welcome Queen Alice
With 90 times 90 times
90 times nine
You've missed the soup
and fish! Serve the roast!
You seem a little shy. Let me
introduce you to that leg of mutton.
Alice, Leg of Mutton.
Leg of Mutton, Alice.
How do you do?
May I give you a slice?
Certainly not!
It isn't etiquette to cut
somebody you've been introduced to.
Remove the roast!
Will you, won't you, will you,
won't you...
Please don't introduce
the Pudding,
or we shall get
no dinner at all.
May I give you some?
Pudding, Alice.
Alice, Pudding.
What impertinence!
How would you like it if I were to
cut a slice out of you, you creature?
Make a remark.
It's ridiculous to leave all
the conversation to the Pudding.
Well...
You'd better prepare.
We're about to drink to your
health. Queen Alice's health!
Queen Alice's health!
Queen Alice!
Queen Alice!
She ought to make a speech. A speech!
So she ought!
A speech! A speech!
A speech!
A speech!
Speech!
Speech!
I rise to return thanks.
Take care! Something's going to
happen! Something's going to happen!
Here I am!
There was a looking-glass room,
and you were the Red Queen.
There was a whole
looking-glass country.
Miss Simpson?
Has it stopped snowing?
Not quite.
If it has stopped
when your sister returns,
perhaps she will
take you out.
Oh, dear.
Here, kitty.
Suppose it never stops.
Suppose the man in charge of the
snow has forgotten how to stop it.
Don't you think you had better
work a while at your sampler?
No, thank you.
Oh, dear.
Hello, Sir Turtle.
You really must stop that,
Your Majesty. Stop it, I say!
Stop what?
The White Queen just
knocked over the White King.
She never does look
where she's going.
Alice, you know you are not supposed
to play with your father's chessmen.
But I wasn't playing.
She deliberately bumped into His
Majesty and knocked him off his feet.
Alice, are you sure
that that is true?
Well, I saw it.
Alice.
Yes, Miss Simpson.
At any rate, Your Majesty,
stop bumping into your husband.
And you might tidy up a bit.
A white rabbit!
All dressed up in a muffler and
overcoat and big woolly shoes.
There. It's gone into
its nice warm rabbit hole.
It looked so funny
all dressed up.
Alice, I am sure you know that
there is no such thing as a rabbit
dressed up in a muffler
and an overcoat.
You must not say
what is not true.
Well, it...
It wasn't untrue exactly.
I think you had better
finish your tea.
There is another
egg for you to eat.
I did eat both eggs, but I put one
of them all back together again.
Alice!
Yes, Miss Simpson.
The looking-glass room.
You see, Dinah,
as soon as I hold you up,
the little girl in
the looking-glass room
holds up another
cat just like you.
Oh, Dinah, wouldn't you
like to see
what the looking-glass
house is like?
You know, Dinah, there
is a looking-glass house.
First, there's the room
you can see through the glass.
That's just the same
as our sitting room,
only the things
go the other way.
You'd love living there.
But, of course, I don't know whether
looking-glass milk is good to drink.
Well, anyway, then we would
come to the hallway.
It is very like our own
hallway as far as you can see,
only it may be quite
different beyond that.
Oh, Dinah,
wouldn't it be nice
if we could get through to...
I can see all of the looking-glass
room from here, all but a bit.
I would so like to see that little
bit just behind the fireplace.
Do you think, Dinah, that
if I pressed very, very hard
and tried to look straight
down, that I might...
Why, why...
Well, I knew this part of
the room would be different.
But I do wish the looking-glass
chair had moved when I moved ours.
There seems no other way.
If I could only fall
like that all the time!
Can't be English.
Of course.
It's the looking-glass room.
Why, it's Uncle and Aunt!
I knew that if you could
really get behind a picture,
you'd see the backs of people.
Poor Uncle Gilbert.
His trousers are all patched.
My dear niece, how would
you like being framed
in one pair of trousers for
20 years without being patched?
It must be very difficult.
It is.
But after all, it's only the front
of a picture that counts, really.
Of course.
That is all.
8:00.
What did you say?
8:00.
But your hands say
20 minutes to 4:00.
I never let my left hand know
what my right hand is doing.
This side of the looking
glass has me all confused.
That's because everything
is backward on your side.
Why, I...
I never...
Mama! Mama! Mama!
Mama! Mama!
What's that?
It's the voice of my child!
Your child!
Oh, my precious lily!
My imperial kitten!
I must be
with my child.
Let me help you.
Mama! Mama!
Dear me.
There, there,
my royal pawn.
Poor thing.
Watch out for the volcano.
It blew me up! Be sure you
come up the regular way.
Don't get blown up.
You'll be hours and hours
getting to the table at that rate.
I'd far better help you.
No, no!
The King's men! Somebody
call out the King's men!
I assure you, my dear, I shall never,
never forget the horror of this moment.
Well, you will forget, unless
you make a memorandum of it.
I shall be very
happy to remind you.
We will not be
reminded by a volcano.
I'm not a volcano, and
I'm not a cyclone, either.
Then you're either
a cyclano or a volcone.
And...
Well, what time
was that?
I really haven't any idea,
but it's very late.
I must hurry or I shall have to
go back through the looking glass
before I've seen what the
rest of the house is like.
My, what a strange way
to walk about the garden.
The Duchess! The Duchess! Won't she
be savage if I've kept her waiting!
Oh, dear! Oh, dear!
I shall be too late!
My ears and whiskers,
how late it is getting!
Well, after such
a fall as this,
I shall think nothing
of tumbling downstairs.
I wish Dinah were here.
That's such pretty music.
Oh, dear.
Ouch.
Goodbye, dear feet.
Oh, will I ever get to
the beautiful garden?
Oh!
Oh, Mouse!
Do you know the way
out of this pool, oh, Mouse?
I'm very tired of
swimming about here.
Perhaps you don't
understand English.
I daresay you're
a French mouse.
That's French for,
"Where is my cat?"
I beg your pardon. I quite
forgot you didn't like cats.
Wait, oh, Mouse!
Oh, Mouse!
Not like cats?
Would you like cats
if you were me?
Don't be angry. I wish I
could show you our cat Dinah.
You'd take quite
a fancy to her.
She's such a dear, quiet thing,
and so good at catching mice.
Oh, I beg your pardon.
I hate you!
I hate cats!
My whole family hates cats.
Nasty, low, vulgar things!
Oh, dear!
Wait, oh, Mouse!
Cats! Cats!
Cats!
William the Conqueror, whose
cause was favored by the pope,
was soon submitted to by the
English, who wanted leaders,
and had been of late much accustomed
to usurpation and conquest.
Who are you, please?
I am a dodo.
How do you do?
My name is Alice.
And you are very wet.
I'm afraid I am, but there isn't
much I can do about getting dry.
History is the driest
thing I know.
Shall we dry you
with history?
I'd be much obliged
if you could.
Listen well.
Edwin and Morcar,
the earls of
Mercia and Northumbria,
found it advisable
to go with Edgar Aetheling
to meet William and
offer him the crown.
William's conduct at
first was moderate,
but the insolence
of his Normans...
How are you
getting on, my dear?
Beautifully, thank you.
Shall I put you
to sleep now?
No, thank you!
Then you'd best run along.
I'm about to
recite some dates.
Yes, sir.
Thank you. Goodbye.
1585, Shakespeare was born,
1616, Shakespeare died...
Who are you?
I hardly know, sir,
just at present.
At least, I know who I was
when I got up this morning,
but I must have changed
several times since then.
What do you mean by that?
Explain yourself.
I can't explain myself,
because I'm not myself, you see.
I don't see!
I can't put it
more clearly,
for I can't understand it
myself to begin with.
And being so many different
sizes in one day is confusing.
It isn't.
Well, when some day
you turn into a chrysalis,
and after that
into a butterfly,
you'll find it
a bit queer, won't you?
Not a bit!
Well, maybe you wouldn't, but it
would certainly feel very queer to me.
You? Who are you?
I think you ought to tell me
who you are first.
Why?
Good day, sir.
Come back. I have
something important to say.
Yes?
Keep your temper.
Is that all?
No.
So you think you've changed, do you?
I'm afraid I have, sir.
What size do you
want to be?
I should like to be a little
larger, sir, if you wouldn't mind.
Three inches is such
a horrid height to be.
I am three inches high! It's
a very good height to be!
I'm sure it must be, sir, but
you see, I'm not used to it.
You'll get used
to it in time.
One side will
make you grow taller.
The other side will
make you grow shorter.
One side of...
Of what?
The mushroom.
Which side will
make me grow larger?
The large-making side,
of course.
I'll take a little
of both to make sure.
Oh, dear, now I'm too
big again, oh, Caterpillar.
Mr. Caterpillar,
sir, where are you?
Whoever lives here, it would never
do to come upon them this size.
Why, I should frighten them
out of their wits.
For the Duchess.
An invitation from the Queen
to play croquet.
My compliments to the Queen.
My compliments
to the Duchess.
There's no sort of
use in your knocking.
Please, sir,
how am I to get in?
I shall sit here
till tomorrow.
I'm sorry you were hit,
but how am I to get in?
I shall sit here
for days and days.
But what am I to do?
Anything you like.
Please watch
out for the baby!
She nearly killed
the poor little thing.
If everybody minded
their own business,
the world would go round
much faster than it does.
Speak roughly to your little
boy And beat him when he sneezes
He only does it to annoy
Because he knows it teases
Wow! Wow! Wow!
Wow!
Wow!
Wow!
He only does it to annoy
Because he knows it teases
Here, you can nurse
it a bit if you like.
Now, I must go and get ready
to play croquet with the Queen.
Don't grunt. That's not at all a
proper way of expressing yourself.
What am I going to do with this
creature when I get it home?
If you're going to
turn into a pig, my dear,
I'll have nothing more
to do with you. Mind now!
There's no mistake about
you now. You're a pig!
You would have grown up to
be a dreadfully ugly child,
but you do make a handsome pig, I think.
Why do you grin, oh, cat?
Because I'm a Cheshire Cat, that's why.
Well, then,
Cheshire puss,
would you tell me, please, which
way I ought to go from here?
That depends a good deal
on where you want to get to.
I don't care much where.
Then it doesn't matter
which way you go.
So long as
I get somewhere.
You're sure to do that,
if you only walk long enough.
Do you play croquet
with the Queen today?
I should like it very much,
but I haven't been invited yet.
You'll see me there.
Must you go so soon?
By the by, what became
of the baby?
I'd nearly forgotten to ask.
It turned into a pig.
I thought it would.
Did you say pig or fig?
I said pig
and I wish you wouldn't keep
appearing and vanishing so suddenly.
You make one quite giddy.
All right.
Don't you wish
you could do this?
Well, I've often seen a cat without
a grin, but a grin without a cat?
No room! No room!
No room! No room!
There's plenty of room!
Have some wine?
I don't see any wine.
There isn't any.
It wasn't very civil
of you to offer it.
Your hair needs cutting.
You should not make personal
remarks. It's very rude.
Why is a raven
like a writing desk?
I believe I can
answer that.
Do you mean you can
find the answer to it?
Exactly so.
You should say
what you mean.
What day of
the month is it?
Fourth.
Ah! Two days wrong.
I told you that butter
wouldn't suit the works.
Oh!
Some crumbs must
have got in it as well.
Hmm. I put it in
with a bread knife.
It was the best butter,
you know.
What a funny watch! It
tells the days of the month,
but doesn't tell
what "o'clock" it is.
Have you guessed
the riddle yet?
Why... Why, no. I give it up.
What is the answer?
I haven't the slightest idea!
Nor I!
I think you might do
something better with time
than wasting it asking a lot
of riddles that have no answers.
Don't you speak about Time. I daresay
you've never even spoken to him.
Perhaps not.
Time and I quarreled
last March,
just before he went
mad, you know.
It was at a great concert
given by the Queen of Hearts,
and I had to sing, "Twinkle, twinkle,
little bat How I wonder what you're at"
You know the song,
perhaps?
I've heard
something like it.
It goes on,
you know, like this.
Twinkle, twinkle, little bat
How I wonder what you're at
Up above the world you fly
Like a tea tray in the sky
Up above the world you fly
Like a tea tray in the sky
Twinkle, twinkle, twinkle...
Twinkle, twinkle, little bat
How I wonder what you're at
Up above the world you fly
Like a tea tray in the sky
Up above the world you fly
Like a tea tray in the sky
Twinkle, twinkle,
twinkle, twinkle
Twinkle, twinkle...
Well, I'd hardly finished the
first verse when the Queen bawled,
"He's murdering the Time!
Off with his head!"
And ever since that,
he won't do a thing I ask.
It's always 6:00 now.
Is that why all the
tea things are out here?
Yes, that's it.
It's always teatime,
and we have no time
to wash the tea
things in between.
Take some more tea.
I haven't had any yet,
so I can't take more.
You mean you can't take less. It is
very easy to take more than nothing.
I want a clean cup.
It's the stupidest tea party
I ever was at in all my life!
Very curious!
Would you please tell me why
are you painting those roses?
I...
Well, as a matter
of fact, Miss,
this tree should have
been a red rose tree
and we put in
a white one by mistake,
and if the Queen
should find out,
we'll all have
our heads cut off.
So, you see, Miss,
we're doing our best
before she comes
back to paint...
The Queen!
The Queen!
The Queen!
Come, come, get up!
Her Majesty,
the Queen of Hearts.
Her Majesty,
the Queen!
Off with his head!
Off with his head!
What is your name, child?
My name is Alice,
so please Your Majesty.
Off with her head!
Off with her head!
Nonsense!
Off with her head!
Off with her head!
Consider, my dear.
She's only a child.
Off with her head!
Off with her head!
And besides, this is
the executioners' day off.
It is, is it? Well, they shall
lose their heads for this!
Can you play croquet?
Yes.
Then let the game
begin at once.
Hurry! Hurry! Hurry! Hurry!
Must I behead you all?
Here, take it. Play.
Off with some heads.
You're pointing
the wrong way for a mallet!
Pardon me. My back hurts.
Well!
Don't look at me.
I'm as mixed up as you are!
This game's slowing up.
Off with some heads!
Where are my victims?
Search the hedges.
Thrash the bushes.
Shake the trees!
How glad I am to see you
again, you dear old thing.
How did you like
your game?
Well, it was very exciting.
Of course it is.
And the moral of that is,
"Be what you
would like to be."
Or, to put it more simply, "Never
imagine yourself not to be otherwise
"than what it might appear to others
that what you were or might have been
"wasn't otherwise
than what you had been
"would have appeared
to them to be otherwise."
I should understand that
better if it were written down.
I can't quite follow it
as you say it.
That's nothing to what
I could say, if I chose.
And the moral
of that is...
It's a fine day,
Your Majesty.
I give you fair warning. Either you
or your head must be off at once!
Please, Your Majesty,
could you make it go away?
Queen! Queen!
Where are you, Queen?
What fun!
What is the fun?
The Queen.
They never really execute
anybody she condemns, you know.
The King...
The King pardons everybody.
I'm very happy to
know that, I'm sure.
Have you seen
the Mock Turtle yet?
Why... Why, no. I don't even
know what a Mock Turtle is.
It's what mock turtle
soup's made from.
Come here, will you,
Mock Turtle, old thing?
What is his sorrow?
It's all his fancy.
He hasn't got no sorrow.
No sorrow, indeed.
Mine are the sorrows
of a sorrowful sorrow.
Mine are the woes
of a woeful woe.
Mine are the...
This here young lady,
she wants for to know
your history, she do.
I'll tell it her.
Sit down, both of you, and don't
speak a word till I've finished.
Once I was a real turtle.
Oh, dear!
Oh, dear!
When we were little,
we went to school in the sea.
The master was an old turtle.
We used to call him Tortoise.
Why did you call him
Tortoise if he wasn't one?
We called him Tortoise
because he taught us.
You ought to be ashamed of yourself
for asking such a simple question.
We went to school in the sea,
though you mayn't believe it.
I never said I didn't. You did.
Hold your tongue!
We had the best
of educations.
In fact, we went to
school every day.
I've been to
a day school, too.
We learned
French and music.
I only took
the regular course.
What was that?
Reeling and writhing
to begin with.
And then the different
branches of arithmetic,
ambition, distraction,
uglification and derision.
And how many hours a day
did you do lessons?
Ten hours the first day
and nine the next and so on.
That's why
they're called lessons,
because they lessen
from day to day.
Then the 11th day
must have been a holiday.
Of course.
And how did you
manage on the 12th day?
Well, that's enough
about lessons.
Shall we play games,
or shall the Mock Turtle sing?
Oh, a song, please, if the
Mock Turtle would be so kind.
No accounting for tastes.
Sing her Turtle Soup,
will you, old fellow?
In a moment.
Beautiful soup
Who cares for fish
Game, or any other dish?
Who would not give
all else for two
Pennyworth only
of beautiful soup?
Pennyworth only
of beautiful soup
Beautiful soup,
beautiful soup
Soup of the evening
Beautiful soup, beautiful...
Faster! Faster!
Faster! Faster!
Faster! Much faster!
Are we nearly there?
Nearly there?
Why, we passed it
10 minutes ago. Faster!
It's all marked out
like a chessboard.
Of course
it's a chessboard,
and life is a chessboard,
and you are a Queen's pawn.
You will go immediately
to the fourth square,
which you should reach
in exactly no time.
Did you remark something?
I didn't know I had
to make one just then.
You should have told me how kind
it is of me to tell you all this.
No questions? Very well, then, no answers.
Open your mouth wide when you
speak, and always speak in French
if you can't think of
the English for something.
Turn out your
toes as you walk
and always say "Your
Majesty," and so forth.
If you think we're waxworks,
you ought to pay, you know.
Waxworks weren't made to be
looked at for nothing, nohow.
Contrary-wise, if you think
we're alive, you ought to speak.
I'm sure I'm very sorry.
I was wondering which is the
best way out of this wood.
Would you tell me, please?
You've begun wrong.
The first thing in
a visit is to say,
"How do you do?"
And shake hands.
I hope you're
not much tired.
Why, nohow, but thank you
very much for asking.
So much obliged.
You like poetry?
Yes, pretty well.
Some poetry.
But would you tell me first
which road leads out of the woods?
What shall I repeat to her?
The Walrus and the
Carpenter is the longest.
"The sun was shining on the
sea Shining with all his might
"He did his very best to make
The billows smooth and bright
"And this was odd because it
was The middle of the night
"The Walrus and the Carpenter
Were walking close at hand
"They wept like anything to
see Such quantities of sand
"'lf this were only cleared away'
They said, 'it would be grand'
"'lf seven maids with seven
mops Swept it for half a year
"'Do you suppose,'
the Walrus said
"'That they could
get it clear?"'
"'I doubt it,' said the
Carpenter And shed a bitter tear"
"'Oh, oyster, come and walk
with us, ' The Walrus did beseech
"'A pleasant walk, a pleasant
talk Along the briny beach'
"They could not do with more
than four To give a hand to each
"The eldest oyster looked at
him But never a word he said
"The eldest oyster winked his
eye And shook his heavy head
"Meaning to say he did not
choose To leave the oyster bed
"But younger oysters hurried
up All eager for the treat
"Their coats were brushed
Their faces washed
"Their shoes
were clean and neat
"And this was odd because,
you know They hadn't any feet
"'The time has come,' the Walrus
said 'To talk of many things
"'Of shoes and ships and sealing
wax Of cabbages and kings"
"'And why the sea is boiling
hot And whether pigs have wings"'
"'A loaf of bread,' the Walrus
said 'ls what we chiefly need
"'Pepper and vinegar besides
Are very good indeed
"'Now, if you're ready, oysters
dear We can begin to feed'
"'But not on us, ' the oysters
cried Turning a little blue
"'After such kindness that
would be A dismal thing to do!'
"'The night is fine,' the Walrus
said 'Do you admire the view?'
"'I weep for you,' the Walrus
said 'I deeply sympathize'
"With sobs and tears he sorted
out Those of the largest size
"Holding his pocket handkerchief
Before his streaming eyes
"'Oh, oyster,' said the Carpenter
'You've had a pleasant run
"'Shall we be trotting home
again?' But answer came there none
"And this was scarcely odd
because They'd eaten every one"
Well, they were both
very unpleasant characters.
But at any rate, I'd
better be leaving the wood
because it's really getting
very dark. Well, goodbye.
Look!
Do you see that?
It's only a rattle.
Only an old rattle,
quite old and broken.
I knew it was.
It's spoiled, of course.
My nice new rattle.
Of course, you agree
to have a battle?
I suppose so.
Only she must help us
to dress up, you know.
Of course!
"Tweedledee and Tweedledum
Agreed to have a battle
"For Tweedledee
said Tweedledum
"Had spoiled his
nice new rattle
"Just then down flew a monstrous
crow As black as a tar barrel
"Which frightened
both the heroes so
"They quite
forgot their quarrel"
I hope you're good at
pinning and tying string.
All this has got to
go on somehow or other.
This is to keep my head
from being cut off.
You know, one of the most serious
things that can happen to one in a battle
is to get one's head cut off.
Do I look very pale?
Well, yes, a little.
I'm very brave generally,
only today I happen
to have a headache.
Well, I've got a toothache.
I'm far worse than you.
Then you'd both
better not fight today.
We must have
a bit of a fight.
Let's fight till 6:00
and then have dinner.
There's only one sword, but you
can have the umbrella. It's sharper.
Only we must begin quick.
It's getting very, very dark.
And darker and darker.
What a thick black cloud that
is, and how fast it comes!
Why, I do believe
it's got wings.
It's the crow!
The crow!
May I put your
shawl straight for you?
I don't know what's
the matter with it.
It's out of temper, I think.
I've pinned it here and I've pinned
it there, but there's no pleasing it.
It can't go on
straight, you know,
if you put all
the pins on one side.
And dear me, what a state your hair is in!
Oh, the brush has got
entangled in it.
And I lost
the comb yesterday.
There, now you
look better.
My finger's bleeding.
What's the matter?
Have you pricked your finger?
I haven't pricked it yet,
but I soon shall.
When do you expect
to do it?
When I fasten my shawl again,
the broach will come undone.
Watch out, you're holding it all wrong.
Now you understand
the way things happen here.
But why don't you
scream now?
Why, I've done all
the screaming already.
Now, what would be the good
of doing it all over again?
I suppose so.
Well, it's a bit lighter now.
I'm glad that crow is gone.
I hope your
finger's better now.
Much better. Better, better,
better.
What is it
you want to buy?
I should like to
buy an egg, please.
I never put things
into people's hands.
That would never do.
You must get it
for yourself.
What a strange egg!
It keeps growing much faster than
it should! Curiouser and curiouser!
It's bigger
than a chicken!
Why, it's...
It's Humpty-Dumpty!
Don't stand there staring
at me as if I were an egg.
Tell me your name
and your business.
My name is Alice.
It's a stupid enough name.
What does it mean?
Must a name
mean something?
Of course it must.
My name means the shape I am,
and a right handsome
shape it is.
With your name,
you might be any shape.
Why do you sit
out here all alone?
Because there's
nobody with me.
Did you think
I couldn't answer that?
Ask another.
Don't you think you'd
be safer on the ground?
That wall is
so very narrow.
Of course I don't think so.
Why, if I ever did fall off,
which there's no
chance of, but if I did...
If I did fall,
the King has promised me...
To send all his horses
and all his men.
Ah, so, you know. All his
horses and all his men.
They'd pick me up again
in a minute, they would.
However, this conversation
is going on a little too fast.
Let's go back to
the last remark but one.
I'm afraid I can't
quite remember it.
In that case,
we start afresh,
and it's my turn
to choose a subject.
How old did you
say you were?
Twelve years
and four months.
Wrong. You never
said a word like it.
I thought you meant,
"How old are you?"
If I'd meant that,
I'd have said that.
Twelve years and four months.
An uncomfortable sort of age.
Now, my advice would have been to
leave off at 12, but it's too late now.
What a beautiful belt!
Or is it a beautiful collar?
It is a most provoking thing when a
person doesn't know a collar from a belt.
I know it's very
ignorant of me.
It's a collar, child, and
a beautiful one, as you say.
It's a present from
the White King and Queen.
Is it really?
They gave it to me
for an un-birthday present.
I beg your pardon?
I am not offended, and it
isn't respectable to beg.
I mean, what is
an un-birthday present?
A present given when it isn't
your birthday, of course.
I like birthday
presents best.
You don't know what
you're talking about.
How many days are
there in a year?
Three hundred
and sixty-five.
And how many
birthdays have you?
One.
And if you take that
from 365, what remains?
Three hundred and
sixty-four, of course.
Well then, there are 364 days when
you might get un-birthday presents.
Certainly.
And only one for
birthday presents.
That's glory for you!
I don't know what
you mean by glory.
Of course you don't,
till I tell you.
I meant there's a nice
knock-down argument for you.
But glory doesn't
mean that.
When I use a word, it means
what I choose it to mean,
neither more or less.
The question is whether you can
make words mean different things.
The question is, which is to be the
master, you or the word? That's all.
However, I can manage
the whole lot.
Impenetrability,
that's what I say.
Would you tell me,
please, what that means?
I meant by impenetrability that
we've had enough of the subject,
and it would be
just as well
if you would mention what
you mean to do next,
as I suppose you don't mean to
stop here all the rest of your life.
Fancy it meaning all that.
You seem very clever at
explaining words, sir.
Would you kindly tell me the
meaning of a poem called Jabberwocky?
I read it a long time ago.
I can, but I won't.
That's all. Goodbye.
Goodbye,
till we meet again.
I shouldn't know you
if we did meet.
You're so exactly
like other people.
The face is what
one generally goes by.
That's just it. Your face
is the same as everybody's.
The two eyes, so.
Nose in the middle,
mouth under.
Now, if your two eyes were
on the same side of your nose,
or your mouth on the top,
that would be some help.
It wouldn't look nice.
Wait till you've tried.
Watch out!
Help! Help! I'm falling!
Tell the King!
Tell him to bring
his horses and his men!
Help!
What happened?
We ran into each other,
Your Majesty.
Good. I rather fancied
something like that had happened.
Oh, Your Majesty,
Humpty-Dumpty fell off the wall!
I know, I know.
Four-thousand, two-hundred and
seven of my soldiers are on the way.
Two without horses.
If all this King's
horses and men
can't put him back
together again, nobody can.
I'm glad Humpty will be
all right. I was worried.
Well, don't be.
Look along the road
and tell me
if you can see either of
my three messengers.
I see nobody on the road.
Oh, I only wish
I had such eyes!
To be able to see nobody,
and at that distance!
Oh!
It's too, too bad!
Can I help you, sir?
On or off?
You are on.
In a short time
I shall be off again.
I'm so sorry. Are you the King's messenger?
I am the White Knight.
I see you're admiring
my little box.
It's my own invention, to
keep clothes and sandwiches in.
You see, I carry it upside
down so the rain can't come in.
But the things can get out.
Do you know the lid is open?
Then if all the things
have fallen out,
the box is no use
without them.
Can you guess
why I did that?
I can't imagine.
In hopes some bees may make a nest
in it. Then I should get the honey.
But you've got a beehive, or something
like one, fastened to the saddle.
It's a very good beehive, too.
One of the best kind,
but not a single bee
has come near it yet.
That other thing's
a mousetrap.
I suppose the mice
keep the bees out
or the bees keep the mice
out. I don't know which.
It isn't very likely there would
be any mice on a horse's back.
Not very likely, perhaps,
but I don't choose to have
them running all about.
You see, I'm well
provided for everything.
That's the reason the horse has
those anklets around his feet.
What are they for?
To guard against the bites of
sharks. It's my own invention.
But let's go on. I'll go with
you to the edge of the wood.
I hope you've got your
hair well-fastened on.
Only the usual way.
That's hardly enough. You see,
the wind is so strong here.
It's strong as soup.
Have you invented
a plan for keeping
the hair from
being blown off?
Not yet,
but I have a plan for keeping
the hair from falling off.
I should like to
hear it very much.
First, you take
an upright stick,
then you make your hair
creep up it like a vine.
Now, the reason hair falls off
is because it hangs down.
Things never fall upward, you
know. It's my own invention.
You may try it if you like.
I'm a great hand
at inventing things.
Now, I daresay you noticed
the last time you picked me up,
I was looking
rather thoughtful.
You were a little grave.
Well, just then I was inventing
a new way of getting over a gate.
Would you like to hear it?
Very much, indeed.
Well, I'll tell you how I came
to think of it. I said to myself,
"The only difficulty
is with the feet.
"The head's high
enough already."
Now, first I put my head on top of
the gate, then my head's high enough,
then I stand on my head,
then my feet are high enough.
Then I'm over.
Sir Knight!
If there were only
a gate down here,
I'd be in excellent
position to cross it.
How can you go on talking so
quietly with your head in a ditch?
What does it matter
where my body happens to be?
My mind goes on
working all the same.
In fact, I once invented a new
pudding during the meat course.
In time to have it cooked
for the next course? Hmm.
That was quick work.
Well, not the next course.
In fact, I don't believe
that pudding ever was cooked.
What did you mean
it to be made of?
Well, it began
with blotting paper.
That wouldn't be
very nice, I'm afraid.
Not very nice alone, but
imagine how good it would be
mixed with other things, such
as gunpowder and sealing wax.
And here I must leave you.
This is the end of the wood.
You've only
a few yards to go.
Down the hill, across that little
brook, and then you'll be a queen.
At last!
But you'll stay
and see me off first?
I shan't be long.
You'll wait?
Of course I'll wait.
I think it'll encourage me.
Thank you very much for
coming so far out of your way.
For that, I shall expect you
to cry a good deal as I go.
The poor, dear Knight.
He's the nicest person yet.
Well, here I am.
What's this?
A crown! A golden crown!
I'm a queen!
I'm a queen!
How dare you say
that you're a queen.
What right have you
to call yourself so?
You can't be a queen,
you know,
till you've passed
the proper examination,
and the sooner we begin
it, the better. Be seated.
Yes, Your Majesty.
I'm ready, Your Majesties.
Can you do addition?
Now what's one and one and one and
one and one and one, one and one?
I don't know.
I lost count.
She can't do addition.
Can you answer any useful
questions? How is bread made?
I know that.
You take some flour...
Where do you pick the flower,
in a garden or in the hedges?
It isn't picked at all,
it's ground.
But how many
acres of ground?
I wish you wouldn't leave out
so many things!
Oh, dear.
You know any languages?
What's the French
for "fiddle-de-dee"?
Fiddle-de-dee's
not English.
Whoever said it was?
Well, if you'll tell me what
language fiddle-de-dee is,
I'll tell you
the French for it.
Queens never
make bargains!
I'm so sleepy.
She's tired,
poor thing.
So, smooth her hair,
lend her your nightcap and
sing her a soothing lullaby.
I haven't any nightcap, and I
don't know any soothing lullabies.
I'll have to
do it myself.
Hush-a-bye lady
in Alice's lap
When the feast's ready
we've time for a nap
When the feast's over
we'll go to the ball
Red Queen and White Queen
and Alice and all
Now that you know the words, sing
it through to me. I'm sleepy, too.
Now what am I to do?
Do wake up.
To the looking-glass world
It was Alice that said
"I've a scepter in hand
"I've a crown on my head"
No admittance
until week after next.
Why... Why, how dare you!
Fill up the glasses
as quick as you can
And sprinkle the table
With buttons and bran
Put cats in the coffee
and mice in the tea
And welcome Queen Alice
with 30 times three
Put cats in the coffee
and mice in the tea
And welcome Queen Alice
With 30 times three
Then put in the glasses,
molasses and ink
And anything else
that is pleasant to drink
Mix sand with the cider
And wool with the wine
And welcome Queen Alice
With 90 times nine
Mix sand with the cider
And wool with the wine
And welcome Queen Alice
With 90 times 90 times
90 times nine
You've missed the soup
and fish! Serve the roast!
You seem a little shy. Let me
introduce you to that leg of mutton.
Alice, Leg of Mutton.
Leg of Mutton, Alice.
How do you do?
May I give you a slice?
Certainly not!
It isn't etiquette to cut
somebody you've been introduced to.
Remove the roast!
Will you, won't you, will you,
won't you...
Please don't introduce
the Pudding,
or we shall get
no dinner at all.
May I give you some?
Pudding, Alice.
Alice, Pudding.
What impertinence!
How would you like it if I were to
cut a slice out of you, you creature?
Make a remark.
It's ridiculous to leave all
the conversation to the Pudding.
Well...
You'd better prepare.
We're about to drink to your
health. Queen Alice's health!
Queen Alice's health!
Queen Alice!
Queen Alice!
She ought to make a speech. A speech!
So she ought!
A speech! A speech!
A speech!
A speech!
Speech!
Speech!
I rise to return thanks.
Take care! Something's going to
happen! Something's going to happen!
Here I am!
There was a looking-glass room,
and you were the Red Queen.
There was a whole
looking-glass country.