Alien vs. Ninja (2010) Movie Script
Oh, come on.
What now?
Leave it to me.
I can handle them all.
Push this down.
Bring it on. All at once.
What is it?
Didn't you feel something?
No one should be following us.
Chickened out, huh?
Woman's intuition?
Can't count on it.
We thought you were as good as a man,
but now you want us men to protect you?
Cut it out.
We're almost there.
Can you make it?
Ouch!
What the hell are you doing?
- Jeez.
- Why are you hiding?
Waiting for you, of course.
Trying to attack me from
behind as I pass by?
Kill and take all the credit,
I heard this old man say.
Hey, don't say such a thing
in a nonchalant way.
Doesn't sound like a joke.
You're terrible!
You ran away leaving Yamata behind.
Who's terrible?
What? I gave Yamata a new
weapon I made, right?
You call this piece of shit a weapon?
You don't know
how long it took to make this.
How did you survive all these years,
making such stupid things?
I got more weapons, thank you.
I can handle them
without your stupid gadgets.
Don't flatter yourself.
Someone's gonna make you eat dirt.
Yeah?
I'm sure you're not the one.
I hope you guys fall
out and kill each other.
Then I take all the credit.
Hey, go easy on me!
I'm not so young any more.
Hey, did you see?
The fire in the sky?
The work of Lord Oda or Koga ninja?
No, it didn't seem like it.
So what then?
Lightning? A dragon?
Tornado, maybe?
It went toward our village.
We'd better hurry.
Yeah.
Hey, hey! Wait up!
Wait!
Yamata, Jinnai, we're home.
Grit
Sincerity
Look who's here!
I knew it!
Welcome back.
Master is waiting for you.
Us?
What have you done now?
What's with you?
I'm talking to Yamata!
Get lost, you creep!
What do you mean by "done?"
You always pick unnecessary fights
and mess up your missions.
Come again?
Like last night, for example.
All you had to do was recon.
And what else did you do?
That's why he wants to see you.
Learn the first duty of ninja.
And what is that, huh?
To flee? Or sneak about?
Did you hear that?
He doesn't know.
How come?
Oh, I get it. He's not a born ninja.
He was an outsider.
Sorry, I should've known better.
Which means, you can't get the job
done properly! Come on boys.
No way!
No need to say that.
He doesn't kill for no reason.
We kill.
We risk our lives for the job.
Unlike you guys, who do
daily chores in the village.
Oh, give me a break.
But you know, you're kind of cute.
Oh well. Go to Master.
Get going now.
And out of my sight!
Let's go, boys! He's cute, eh?
Don't let it get to you.
He's just jealous of you.
Being the best ninja
can be a pain in the ass.
How did it go?
No soldiers at the castle.
They might have
already joined the Oda army.
So there were ninja guarding the castle?
Correct, sir. But they were no good at all.
Yamata here took all of them down.
You just watched, Nezumi?
No, no, no, I just fled,
leaving Yamata behind.
That's the smartest way to stay alive, huh?
Yes, sir...
I just gave the young ones all the credit.
Then, I should assign you
a mission you can handle.
A mysterious ball of fire
fell near the village.
We saw that on our way back.
All the other ninja are out now.
I know you three just came back
and you must be tired, but...
Go and search the area with the
group who came back last night.
You think it was a tool of Oda's army?
I'm not sure.
When you find out...
Get back to me immediately.
Now go.
Yes sir.
So the others are gathering
information on warlords, huh?
The fate of us Iga ninja depends on
the warlord we side with.
Guys! Wait! Wait up!
We just need to side with
the one who ensures our survival, eh?
Oda or Tokugawa, doesn't matter.
Got big ears, huh?
Of course! I'm a ninja, too!
I can hear you guys from a distance.
Doesn't matter?
Sure, you're good at kissing ass.
We ninja work in the shadows.
That's who we are.
You always step out of the shadows.
You'll get yourself killed.
I hate staying in the shadows.
I'd prefer to take down big shots
rather than their men.
I've got the right thing for you.
The custom-made auto-ninja exterminator!
Oh, that piece of shit.
No way, this has been modified.
It will work just fine.
It's fine. I guess.
Oh, and then... Presto!
Cool stuff, huh?
A dagger?
Take a close look.
You gotta give up old weapons and
get cool stuff from foreigners.
Well, this is mine though.
Let me try.
Hey!
Hey, give it back!
Come on.
Okay, you win.
How about this?
Pretty powerful.
No thanks. I've always wanted to fire a gun.
Give it back to me!
I'm serious!
Watch it! Yamata, no!
Give it back! Give me!
Told you! Stop playing around!
I ain't got much ammo.
Hey, no, it wasn't me.
I didn't do this. No.
No, I didn't do...
Sorry!
I was having a good time!
It hurts.
It's your fault.
Shit, blood.
Still alive, huh?
You too.
Did you see the fire?
Yeah, on our way back.
Where did it go?
Over there.
About 20 km from here.
Wait a minute. You guys go first.
Don't be a nuisance.
Why? We returned after they did.
It's only natural.
Sure, I'll guide you.
Follow me, old man.
A young girl will guide us!
Living long isn't so bad.
Told you.
How was the mission?
Boring.
Did what you do best?
How was yours?
I could use a challenge.
Want it right here, right now?
Actually, I want it in bed.
What is it?
Bear or something.
No bears around here.
What then?
Our enemies wouldn't leave a mark like this.
Who are you?
Why don't you answer?
Talk or I'll kill you.
Stop, Yamata.
Look at him. He's so shook up.
Don't scare him.
Hungry?
Food!
Yes, ma'am.
Eat.
What happened?
Are you alone?
Where are you from?
You all right?
Come on!
Assemble!
Rin!
Get a grip! Run!
Yamata!
Let's get out of here!
I'm staying!
Forget it! It's too fast!
Go! Now!
You'll die!
That thing killed our brothers!
Yamata!
Come with us!
Yamata!
Damn!
What was that?
Anybody see anything?
Just part of it.
And the others?
So, that thing came to
our village last night...
Is it a dog or wolf sent by the Oda army?
Or a bear after all?
Too big for a dog or wolf.
Too fast for a bear.
Then what? Demon? Monster?
We got a monster in our village?
I've been many places over the years, but...
I've never heard of such a monster!
It could come from a foreign
land along with firearms.
Do we have to deal with it,
whatever it may be?
I've survived many years...
...only to be killed by a monster?
No way! No!
Now what?
- Yamata!
- What?
You...
You brought that thing!
What? Say it louder!
Kill that thing!
That killed everyone in my village.
Your village?
So you fled?
What does it want?
It's a monster, all right?
It just wants to kill us all.
Sure.
I've never fled from enemies
who killed our brothers, right?
Right?
But not this time.
But whatever that thing may be,
we are ninja.
You may be too young, but you
can't flee from the monster
without getting revenge, right?
Yes.
Keep watch.
Ouch! Oh shit! It hurts!
Why do I have to do this?
Scared me.
Serves you right!
Nezumi, get down!
It can't be!
That's exciting.
I don't think so!
No! There it is!
Sorry I took so long.
You bastard!
The Strongest
Go ahead, pick them up.
You all right?
Yeah.
You okay?
Yeah. No broken bones.
What happened to Jinnai?
Dead.
He must be.
He was taken by the monster.
Devoured already.
What were you doing when
Jinnai and Rin were attacked?
Taking a nap?
I was sent flying through the air.
You saw it.
You didn't get a scratch.
How could you give up so fast?
It hurts! I'm sorry!
At any rate...
...let's get back to the village.
We must report to Master.
Hey! I have an idea!
That's the last one.
Let's capture it.
Huh?
Release it in the Oda territory.
Let it destroy the Oda army and Koga ninja.
We can receive rewards from Grand Master.
Nonsense.
Or, we could lure it into
other villages of Iga ninja...
...and have it kill all the others.
That way, we can rule the whole
Iga clan! What do you think?
Enough!
What we must do now is save Jinnai, right?
Why? Are you nuts?
What do we get then?
You're gonna fight that
slimy monster for no reward?
He saved me when he was attacked.
And you saved him, too.
You saw it?
No, that boy told me so.
No I didn't!
Don't make a fool of me.
Where have you been?
It's dangerous.
I found a trail of blood.
That monster must be bleeding.
Let's go save him.
We can track down the monster!
I was so afraid.
But watching you guys fight...
I wanna do my part.
I wanna avenge my mother
and my people! Please!
Don't take him seriously, Yamata.
He's just a kid.
He's gonna get you killed for sure.
Yeah, I know.
What? I'm not going there.
I'm going back.
Yeah, tell Master about it.
Somebody has to do it.
It's important.
Oh, yeah.
You're right.
I guess I'll have to go.
I'm a senior.
You bet I will.
Better now than later.
I'll go now.
See ya!
Are you sure?
We should warn the village.
That thing could go there.
Now, show us the trail.
Let's go save Jinnai.
Why did the monsters take them away alive?
Fresh meat, I guess.
Yamata!
What?
He doesn't have to know.
Why not? Nishi will join us
as ninja someday like his father.
I want Jinnai alive, too. But
ninja are inseparable from death.
We're living on the edge.
If you don't like that,
be a farmer or something.
You volunteered.
You should know that.
Why did you become a ninja, Rin?
I have no brothers. So I did my
father a favor and became one.
No choice?
No, no.
I just didn't like the fact
that my dad wanted me to be a man.
My old man was a peasant.
Killed in a war with my mother.
I was adopted.
We have to fight to live.
But I won't give up on him.
I don't expect to live long.
I'll just fight with my brothers.
Right?
Look.
They're not from Iga.
Must be Koga ninja.
They were scouting?
Out for that fire?
Killed by the monster, huh?
Where are the bodies?
I'm home.
Oh shit.
Monster...
Uh-oh.
Look!
What the hell?
Nezumi?
Yamata! Help! Help me!
What's wrong?
Everyone is...
What?
Dead! All of them!
What?
Where is it?
Let's get out of here!
It'll kill us all!
It's not here.
Where's Jinnai?
Is that Jinnai?
It's the monster thing.
Huh?
Kid, I'll teach you how to fight.
But for now, stay back.
Don't come out.
Come on! Wake up!
What's going on?
We'll have to kill them.
Jinnai, too?
Yeah, I know that!
Shut the fuck up.
Their throat!
Jinnai! Come on! Wake up!
You all right?
Ya... Yamata...
Yamata!
See to Jinnai.
Smart bastard, aren't you?
Death
Revenge is ours.
You okay?
Feel funny.
What did you do to me?
I hate reaching into your throat.
Hey.
Okay, let's go.
Nishi! Hurry up!
What are you doing?
Let's go.
Nishi!
Coming!
What now?
Leave it to me.
I can handle them all.
Push this down.
Bring it on. All at once.
What is it?
Didn't you feel something?
No one should be following us.
Chickened out, huh?
Woman's intuition?
Can't count on it.
We thought you were as good as a man,
but now you want us men to protect you?
Cut it out.
We're almost there.
Can you make it?
Ouch!
What the hell are you doing?
- Jeez.
- Why are you hiding?
Waiting for you, of course.
Trying to attack me from
behind as I pass by?
Kill and take all the credit,
I heard this old man say.
Hey, don't say such a thing
in a nonchalant way.
Doesn't sound like a joke.
You're terrible!
You ran away leaving Yamata behind.
Who's terrible?
What? I gave Yamata a new
weapon I made, right?
You call this piece of shit a weapon?
You don't know
how long it took to make this.
How did you survive all these years,
making such stupid things?
I got more weapons, thank you.
I can handle them
without your stupid gadgets.
Don't flatter yourself.
Someone's gonna make you eat dirt.
Yeah?
I'm sure you're not the one.
I hope you guys fall
out and kill each other.
Then I take all the credit.
Hey, go easy on me!
I'm not so young any more.
Hey, did you see?
The fire in the sky?
The work of Lord Oda or Koga ninja?
No, it didn't seem like it.
So what then?
Lightning? A dragon?
Tornado, maybe?
It went toward our village.
We'd better hurry.
Yeah.
Hey, hey! Wait up!
Wait!
Yamata, Jinnai, we're home.
Grit
Sincerity
Look who's here!
I knew it!
Welcome back.
Master is waiting for you.
Us?
What have you done now?
What's with you?
I'm talking to Yamata!
Get lost, you creep!
What do you mean by "done?"
You always pick unnecessary fights
and mess up your missions.
Come again?
Like last night, for example.
All you had to do was recon.
And what else did you do?
That's why he wants to see you.
Learn the first duty of ninja.
And what is that, huh?
To flee? Or sneak about?
Did you hear that?
He doesn't know.
How come?
Oh, I get it. He's not a born ninja.
He was an outsider.
Sorry, I should've known better.
Which means, you can't get the job
done properly! Come on boys.
No way!
No need to say that.
He doesn't kill for no reason.
We kill.
We risk our lives for the job.
Unlike you guys, who do
daily chores in the village.
Oh, give me a break.
But you know, you're kind of cute.
Oh well. Go to Master.
Get going now.
And out of my sight!
Let's go, boys! He's cute, eh?
Don't let it get to you.
He's just jealous of you.
Being the best ninja
can be a pain in the ass.
How did it go?
No soldiers at the castle.
They might have
already joined the Oda army.
So there were ninja guarding the castle?
Correct, sir. But they were no good at all.
Yamata here took all of them down.
You just watched, Nezumi?
No, no, no, I just fled,
leaving Yamata behind.
That's the smartest way to stay alive, huh?
Yes, sir...
I just gave the young ones all the credit.
Then, I should assign you
a mission you can handle.
A mysterious ball of fire
fell near the village.
We saw that on our way back.
All the other ninja are out now.
I know you three just came back
and you must be tired, but...
Go and search the area with the
group who came back last night.
You think it was a tool of Oda's army?
I'm not sure.
When you find out...
Get back to me immediately.
Now go.
Yes sir.
So the others are gathering
information on warlords, huh?
The fate of us Iga ninja depends on
the warlord we side with.
Guys! Wait! Wait up!
We just need to side with
the one who ensures our survival, eh?
Oda or Tokugawa, doesn't matter.
Got big ears, huh?
Of course! I'm a ninja, too!
I can hear you guys from a distance.
Doesn't matter?
Sure, you're good at kissing ass.
We ninja work in the shadows.
That's who we are.
You always step out of the shadows.
You'll get yourself killed.
I hate staying in the shadows.
I'd prefer to take down big shots
rather than their men.
I've got the right thing for you.
The custom-made auto-ninja exterminator!
Oh, that piece of shit.
No way, this has been modified.
It will work just fine.
It's fine. I guess.
Oh, and then... Presto!
Cool stuff, huh?
A dagger?
Take a close look.
You gotta give up old weapons and
get cool stuff from foreigners.
Well, this is mine though.
Let me try.
Hey!
Hey, give it back!
Come on.
Okay, you win.
How about this?
Pretty powerful.
No thanks. I've always wanted to fire a gun.
Give it back to me!
I'm serious!
Watch it! Yamata, no!
Give it back! Give me!
Told you! Stop playing around!
I ain't got much ammo.
Hey, no, it wasn't me.
I didn't do this. No.
No, I didn't do...
Sorry!
I was having a good time!
It hurts.
It's your fault.
Shit, blood.
Still alive, huh?
You too.
Did you see the fire?
Yeah, on our way back.
Where did it go?
Over there.
About 20 km from here.
Wait a minute. You guys go first.
Don't be a nuisance.
Why? We returned after they did.
It's only natural.
Sure, I'll guide you.
Follow me, old man.
A young girl will guide us!
Living long isn't so bad.
Told you.
How was the mission?
Boring.
Did what you do best?
How was yours?
I could use a challenge.
Want it right here, right now?
Actually, I want it in bed.
What is it?
Bear or something.
No bears around here.
What then?
Our enemies wouldn't leave a mark like this.
Who are you?
Why don't you answer?
Talk or I'll kill you.
Stop, Yamata.
Look at him. He's so shook up.
Don't scare him.
Hungry?
Food!
Yes, ma'am.
Eat.
What happened?
Are you alone?
Where are you from?
You all right?
Come on!
Assemble!
Rin!
Get a grip! Run!
Yamata!
Let's get out of here!
I'm staying!
Forget it! It's too fast!
Go! Now!
You'll die!
That thing killed our brothers!
Yamata!
Come with us!
Yamata!
Damn!
What was that?
Anybody see anything?
Just part of it.
And the others?
So, that thing came to
our village last night...
Is it a dog or wolf sent by the Oda army?
Or a bear after all?
Too big for a dog or wolf.
Too fast for a bear.
Then what? Demon? Monster?
We got a monster in our village?
I've been many places over the years, but...
I've never heard of such a monster!
It could come from a foreign
land along with firearms.
Do we have to deal with it,
whatever it may be?
I've survived many years...
...only to be killed by a monster?
No way! No!
Now what?
- Yamata!
- What?
You...
You brought that thing!
What? Say it louder!
Kill that thing!
That killed everyone in my village.
Your village?
So you fled?
What does it want?
It's a monster, all right?
It just wants to kill us all.
Sure.
I've never fled from enemies
who killed our brothers, right?
Right?
But not this time.
But whatever that thing may be,
we are ninja.
You may be too young, but you
can't flee from the monster
without getting revenge, right?
Yes.
Keep watch.
Ouch! Oh shit! It hurts!
Why do I have to do this?
Scared me.
Serves you right!
Nezumi, get down!
It can't be!
That's exciting.
I don't think so!
No! There it is!
Sorry I took so long.
You bastard!
The Strongest
Go ahead, pick them up.
You all right?
Yeah.
You okay?
Yeah. No broken bones.
What happened to Jinnai?
Dead.
He must be.
He was taken by the monster.
Devoured already.
What were you doing when
Jinnai and Rin were attacked?
Taking a nap?
I was sent flying through the air.
You saw it.
You didn't get a scratch.
How could you give up so fast?
It hurts! I'm sorry!
At any rate...
...let's get back to the village.
We must report to Master.
Hey! I have an idea!
That's the last one.
Let's capture it.
Huh?
Release it in the Oda territory.
Let it destroy the Oda army and Koga ninja.
We can receive rewards from Grand Master.
Nonsense.
Or, we could lure it into
other villages of Iga ninja...
...and have it kill all the others.
That way, we can rule the whole
Iga clan! What do you think?
Enough!
What we must do now is save Jinnai, right?
Why? Are you nuts?
What do we get then?
You're gonna fight that
slimy monster for no reward?
He saved me when he was attacked.
And you saved him, too.
You saw it?
No, that boy told me so.
No I didn't!
Don't make a fool of me.
Where have you been?
It's dangerous.
I found a trail of blood.
That monster must be bleeding.
Let's go save him.
We can track down the monster!
I was so afraid.
But watching you guys fight...
I wanna do my part.
I wanna avenge my mother
and my people! Please!
Don't take him seriously, Yamata.
He's just a kid.
He's gonna get you killed for sure.
Yeah, I know.
What? I'm not going there.
I'm going back.
Yeah, tell Master about it.
Somebody has to do it.
It's important.
Oh, yeah.
You're right.
I guess I'll have to go.
I'm a senior.
You bet I will.
Better now than later.
I'll go now.
See ya!
Are you sure?
We should warn the village.
That thing could go there.
Now, show us the trail.
Let's go save Jinnai.
Why did the monsters take them away alive?
Fresh meat, I guess.
Yamata!
What?
He doesn't have to know.
Why not? Nishi will join us
as ninja someday like his father.
I want Jinnai alive, too. But
ninja are inseparable from death.
We're living on the edge.
If you don't like that,
be a farmer or something.
You volunteered.
You should know that.
Why did you become a ninja, Rin?
I have no brothers. So I did my
father a favor and became one.
No choice?
No, no.
I just didn't like the fact
that my dad wanted me to be a man.
My old man was a peasant.
Killed in a war with my mother.
I was adopted.
We have to fight to live.
But I won't give up on him.
I don't expect to live long.
I'll just fight with my brothers.
Right?
Look.
They're not from Iga.
Must be Koga ninja.
They were scouting?
Out for that fire?
Killed by the monster, huh?
Where are the bodies?
I'm home.
Oh shit.
Monster...
Uh-oh.
Look!
What the hell?
Nezumi?
Yamata! Help! Help me!
What's wrong?
Everyone is...
What?
Dead! All of them!
What?
Where is it?
Let's get out of here!
It'll kill us all!
It's not here.
Where's Jinnai?
Is that Jinnai?
It's the monster thing.
Huh?
Kid, I'll teach you how to fight.
But for now, stay back.
Don't come out.
Come on! Wake up!
What's going on?
We'll have to kill them.
Jinnai, too?
Yeah, I know that!
Shut the fuck up.
Their throat!
Jinnai! Come on! Wake up!
You all right?
Ya... Yamata...
Yamata!
See to Jinnai.
Smart bastard, aren't you?
Death
Revenge is ours.
You okay?
Feel funny.
What did you do to me?
I hate reaching into your throat.
Hey.
Okay, let's go.
Nishi! Hurry up!
What are you doing?
Let's go.
Nishi!
Coming!