All You Can Eat Buddha (2017) Movie Script

Welcome to the Hotel Palacio.
You're here to have
a most excellent holiday.
Please feel welcome.
Ladies and gentlemen,
I wish you a wonderful stay.
Welcome...
Welcome to the Hotel Palacio.
Ladies and gentlemen,
welcome to the Hotel Palacio.
I wish you a wonderful stay.
Welcome to the Hotel Palacio.
I wish you a wonderful stay.
You assholes!
Welcome, everyone!
Welcome to El Palacio, sir.
Welcome, lady.
You made it.
My sole mission is to satisfy
your every wish.
Your pleasure is our pleasure.
Welcome, sir.
Welcome, madame!
Welcome to...
At your service.
Welcome to the Hotel Palacio.
Mr...?
Mike.
Hello, Mike.
My name is Valentino and...
I'm here to help you.
Giant!
Dear guest...
Your room is ready.
I hope you will find it to your liking.
Welcome to the Hotel Palacio.
We wish you a wonderful stay.
Here is your key.
Make the most of it.
Your chamber maid, Esmeralda.
My name is
Jean-Pierre Villeneuve,
alias JP Newtown.
Move your hips! 1, 2, 3...
One,
two,
three,
five,
six,
seven...
What are you still doing up?
Waddayou stilldoingup?
Santiago!
Come on!
Good night.
Goonite.
Tonight, we promise you an evening
of fun and games.
Is anyone here from France?
France, rise up!
Nobody from France.
And last but not least,
anyone from Qubec?
Would you look at that!
Vive le Qubec libre !
Ladies and gentlemen...
Forget the world of sadness and haste.
Forget yourselves and rediscover pleasure,
light and love.
Here your dreams become reality. The...
I'm sorry, Mike.
Are you headed to the airport?
If so, I must sadly inform you
that your bus has left.
I can hail you a cab,
you'll arrive before the bus.
Is it possible to stay on a bit?
Everything's possible, Mike.
Any idea how much longer
you'd like to stay?
I don't know yet.
An adventurer!
No, just the opposite.
Dear guest,
I'm delighted to hear
you're extending your stay.
Please feel completely free
to ask me for anything you want.
Your chamber maid, Esmeralda.
Hi!
Thank you,
human.
From the bottom of my souls,
thank you!
Creature both strange,
and limited,
your destiny is linked to mine.
May your voice
be heard.
May your gaze captivate.
May your heart discover reason.
May your mind be moved.
May your manhood rise.
May I ask your name?
Mike.
Very pleased to meet you, Mike.
I'm Burt.
Are you OK?
Yeah.
Are you training for an event
or a competition?
You were watching me eat?
Yes.
Did you enjoy it?
You seemed so...
intimate with your food.
I was enthralled.
Who's she?
My daughter, Claire.
Unfortunately,
shes lost all desire.
She has no appetite.
She hasn't eaten anything solid for...
six months.
I don't know how much longer
she can go on.
Hamburger.
French fries.
Ice cream.
Mango.
Meatball.
Eggs.
Chicken.
Tortilla.
Hot dog.
Rock and roll!
Yes! Sensual and suave.
Dear guest,
Your pain saddens me deeply.
Here's an aloe plant
to help treat your sunburn.
Your chamber maid,
Esmeralda
Need some help?
A good sunburn is essential
for a uniform tan.
Momentary pain
in the name of greater beauty.
And your skin seems to have known
its share of pain, right?
You brought my daughter back to life.
Don't exaggerate.
I'll tell the whole world
about you, Mike.
Do me a favor, forget me.
Look after your daughter.
I will look after my daughter, Mike.
I know I neglected her.
But forget you?
Impossible.
Claire?
I sincerely hope you won't be mad
at me or your chamber maid, but...
we couldn't help noticing that
you seem to have used up
your supply of medicine.
I know it may seem disrespectful
of your privacy
and I'll understand
if you're angry, but...
we were very worried about your health.
We were truly saddened
when we noticed.
We would be distraught
if you became sick.
Our resources
are limited for the moment.
Stop crying! Stop crying!
Stop it! Stop it!
Leave my boy alone.
A boy without authority
isn't a man.
- It's not your problem!
- It's my problem when it happens here.
I told you, you bastard!
You're not his dad!
Bastard?
Ladies and gentlemen,
please give a warm hand...
Direct from Los Angeles, California...
The real...
Michael...
Johnson!
They were a beautiful couple.
Esmeralda.
- Hi
- Hi.
Can I help you with something?
No, thank you.
It would be a pleasure.
You do your job, I'll do mine.
As you want.
That's what I want.
Oh savior,
come with me.
Feel this cruel love...
distant,
sweet and tragic.
Oh, morbid temptations...
Oh, infinite spirals...
Oh, agony.
May I join you?
Sure.
Have a drink?
With pleasure.
You seem to like it here, right?
Frankly, I don't understand
why you like it so much.
You don't swim, you don't party.
I can't say that you dance either.
You spend the whole day
staring at the ocean.
And you watching me.
Want me to tell you the truth?
To talk man to man?
Youre completely neglecting your body.
Can't argue with that.
You're literally letting yourself die.
So why do women fall all over you?
Why do they all love you, desperately?
And me,
they completely ignore.
That's what's eating at you?
It's torture.
The days of good rum are numbered.
But you mustn't spit
in your neighbor's bottle.
This came in the mail for you.
One never truly appreciates a treasure
until it's gone.
That was true of my daughter's pride
and even more
of your luminous presence...
My companions and I
are infinitely grateful to you
and eternally devoted.
With each day the number of us
in the four corners of the country
who worship your light multiplies.
With deep affection,
your humble and devoted friend, Burt.
Welcome, everybody.
Welcome, sir. Welcome to El Palacio.
My name's Mike.
Great.
And you?
Sasha.
A pleasure, Sasha.
What do you want from me?
Nothing.
Unless there's something you'd like.
I don't need anything.
Need and want...
two different things.
Look, I'm really sorry
for the other night.
I don't know what it was.
I'm really not myself these days.
I don't know what's wrong, it's like...
like my stomach was
constantly grumbling.
Does yours do that?
It's like...
Im numb.
Slower.
Like Im paralyzed.
Like my bodys no longer mine.
Can't be easy
when your body's not yours.
No.
Santiago!
Don't jump in the puddle, you'll fall.
Beat it.
See you.
May I sit next to you?
Be my guest.
I'm Esmeralda.
I know.
I'm Mike.
I know.
Ladies and gentlemen, Mike...
First, let me thank you for coming.
The staff and I are sincerely grateful.
However, it is my duty to inform you
that a storm is coming.
A big storm, we're told.
Rest assured, we'll compensate
for the inconvenience
with an even more
explosive show tonight.
We will drown out the storm
with our fireworks!
Enjoy your evening
and remember that our entire team
is here for you,
whatever you may wish.
Storms wash everything clean,
you'll see.
I don't like storms.
I love them.
Nothing scares me,
except gathering clouds.
Nothing scares me,
except sharing secrets.
Mike? Forgive me, Mike.
We miss you.
We all miss you.
I tell everyone about you.
About you and your miracles.
I think I've understood
something about you, Mike.
You eat because
you know another dish is on its way.
And another one after that one.
And the promise of a new dish
is like the promise of a new start.
You're delirious, Burt.
There's no new dish,
no beginning or end.
There's not even appetite.
It's magnificent!
Seriously, Burt,
I'd like to be left alone.
I know. Only a false prophet
would demand attention.
- You done?
- For now, yes.
But we'll come pay tribute to you
as soon as possible.
You can count on us.
I never counted on anyone.
I won't start now.
My one and only desire is
to be left alone.
What is it, Val?
I know how it may look, Mike,
but I swear
that we're working tirelessly
to bring back a menu
that's more gastronomical,
more inspired,
more varied.
I shouldn't tell you,
but big changes are in the offing.
A mutiny?
A change of administration,
most probably.
Will this change of administration
happen soon?
As soon as possible, naturally.
But when the sea is rough,
a captain mustn't ask
when he'll reach port,
but rather focus on
the mighty waves that swell
with every blast of the gale.
Are you expecting another bus?
There are no transfers scheduled.
The change of administration?
Exactly, Mike.
The ship maintains its course,
with strength and conviction.
You have neither dignity nor pride.
I should have left long ago.
That's it, I'll leave.
Was I asleep long?
Very long, Mike.
May I be totally honest with you?
Of course.
You're crazy, Mike.
I've known that a long time.
And you should have left here
a long time ago.
You need to rest, Mike.
I need to eat, Val.
Dear Mike,
the hotel is going through
a difficult period.
Tourists are becoming rarer.
The employees are tired,
and I'm coping as best I can.
We are proud, and want to stay strong.
But if fatigue inadvertently
reveals our flaws more than usual,
know that you are the ray of light
in our darkness.
It is an honor to have you with us.
Esmeralda.
Giant.
It's the end of the world!
Do you hear me, Giant?
Don't be a coward!
I'm hungry.
There's nothing left, Mike.
That's impossible.
There's always something.
We looked everywhere,
searched all our pantries.
The island...
has nothing left to offer.
The sea,
a blue prison,
deep and dark.
But he need simply carry me
to where the murky depths hold me fast.
Pure melancholy!
Oh heavenly light.
The night shimmers,
embraces infinity.
A torrent inside me
of colors,
emotions,
wanton intoxication...
Ecstasy!
Oh love,
your divine flesh,
your lifeblood and mine.
Take me.
Dear Mike,
the struggle has borne fruit.
The change of administration
has taken place.
How I wish I could have
shown you the hotel.
It's a miracle.
Everything is different.
Everything is as before.
All that's missing is you.
Come back, Mike.
We all miss you.
Today,
yesterday,
tomorrow,
now,
and forever.
Esmeralda.