Am I OK? (2022) Movie Script
["Can I Go On" by
Sleater-Kinney playing]
Everyone I know is tired
And everyone I
know Is wired
To machines, it's obscene
I'll just scream 'Til
it don't hurt no more
Ooh, ooh, ooh
Everyone I know is happy
But everyone I
know Is napping
Half the day thrown away
But I can't find
The thrill anymore
Ooh, ooh, ooh
Maybe I'm not sure
I wanna go on
Maybe I'm not sure
I wanna go on at all
[indistinct chatter]
You're gonna get a veggie burger
with sweet potato fries.
You don't know
what I'm gonna get.
Okay.
[waiter] You girls all set?
Yeah. Can I get the
Chinese chicken salad
- and a hot green tea, please?
- [waiter] Mmm-hmm.
And for you?
Um, can I please have...
[whispering] the
veggie burger?
I think... I can't hear you.
[whispers] Veggie burger with
sweet potato fries, please.
[waiter whispers] Okay.
- Oh, and can I also have an...
- [girls] ...iced coffee?
- Just black. Thank you.
- Black. Thank you.
You don't know me.
I do know you.
What are you doing tonight?
Um, I'm going to
have dinner with Ben.
- Lucy!
- Jane!
You have to put him
out of his misery
and eff him already.
You need to do that.
[laughing] What? I
absolutely do not!
What's the problem? He's
great, you like him.
You get to tell
your kids you met
when his toilet overflowed
into your kitchen.
- Lucy, he's in love with you.
- Hey. Hey, baby.
Hi, babe. We just ordered.
I was starving. Hello.
Oh, yeah? Well, thank you for
waiting that extra 30 seconds
I told you it would
take me to park.
Lucy's having dinner
with Ben tonight.
[laughing incredulously]
What? Is tonight the night?
Are we... [blows]
ready? [chuckles]
Why did you blow on it?
Because it's dusty, silly pants.
We're friends, you guys.
He's going to help me
install this new shelf.
[laughs] This poor bastard.
- Let me tell you something.
- What?
Before this lovely woman and
I made love to each other...
Ew, no. Don't
say it like that.
- I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
- Yeah.
Before we made love
in each other...
- [Lucy laughs]
- [Jane chuckles]
we were great friends,
and I would've installed
anything for her.
I would've built her a house.
A very small,
conveniently-sized house.
You wanna know why?
Because I knew that was
going to lead to sex.
I followed her
around like an idiot.
I got a pedicure once.
Desperately needed, but he did.
You guys, no. We're
seriously just friends.
We shake hands after
we have dinner.
[Lucy and man] Ew!
- You guys shake hands?
- Yeah.
- Why would you do...
- [softly] For God's sake.
Like... Like, he's
your accountant?
- No, it's funny.
- It's not funny.
No, I didn't laugh. I
didn't laugh one time.
[Jane] I'm telling you
this because I care.
You need to fuck
or get off the pot.
- I don't think that's how...
- Just do it.
- [man] Do it.
- [Jane] Do it.
- Do it.
- Do it!
- Do it!
- [squeals] Do it!
- [Lucy] We did it!
- [Ben] Yay.
How many paintings do
you think it can hold?
[tapping on wood]
It's sturdy.
I don't know if I'd
put anything on it.
I've never used a drill before.
- [footsteps receding]
- [bottles clinking]
["Easy to Love" by Ivan &
Alyosha playing over speakers]
Thanks.
For all your hard work.
- [chuckles]
- What is this?
It's a Stella.
It might be expired,
though, I...
Uh, I don't really
drink a lot of beer,
but it tastes like
beer. Mmm-hmm.
That's not what I meant.
- What did you mean?
- Oh.
Oh! [chuckles]
- Sorry.
- [chuckles]
- I'm gonna go.
- [sighs] No, Ben.
Why?
Because you just
catapulted off the bed
when I got close to you.
I was caught off guard.
Caught off guard is when
somebody tosses a ball at you
and you flinch, but
you still catch it.
You just slithered away
like Mr. Bean or something.
I thought we were
just staying friends.
But you're playing
all these love songs,
like, really romantic ones.
[Lucy] It's a playlist.
It's called, "All
The Feelz," with a z.
I can see how that
would be misleading.
I just liked it
because of the sadness.
I'll see you later, Lucy.
[door opens and closes]
I forget, you do like it
when I say "I told you so,"
- or you don't like that.
- [sighs deeply]
Everything was okay
until you put it out
into the universe.
Why don't you just
sleep with him?
- Because I don't want to.
- Oh, why not?
I just don't.
Hmm. May I venture a guess?
- No.
- I think
it's because you're afraid
of getting close to someone
for fear of rejection.
Or it could be a
fear of intimacy
stemming from your youth,
your parents' bad marriage
or something that happened
you can't even remember.
No.
Hi. Have you two been
in my class with before?
- [Jane] We haven't.
- [gasps] Great.
I love virgins.
Wow. Oh, my God.
You two were definitely
sisters in a past life.
But one of you
betrayed the other
and burned her at the
stake for being a witch.
That feels like a
her thing to do.
Anyways, if you need anything
during the class,
just let me know.
I do really bomb adjustments.
- "Bomb adjustments."
- Thank you all for letting me
be a part of your
practice today.
Yoga is a great way to calm
our minds and our bodies
and to become one with
ourselves and each other.
So, today's class is gonna be
a rap battle between
Fetty Wap and Lil Yachty.
- [instructor claps]
- [siren wails]
[rap song plays]
[scattered laughter]
[low indistinct chatter]
Do you really think
we were sisters?
[chuckles] I don't think
someone named Sky Jade
- would make that up.
- [chuckles]
I hope I was the cool sister.
I hope I was called Denise.
[laughing] What?
Denise?
Yeah. I've always
wanted to be Denise.
[laughing] That's so lezz.
What? Was Nonce taken?
No, but Nance was.
- Nonce was available.
- [both laughing]
Nobody's named Nonce.
[both continue laughing]
Don't you wanna have
a different name?
Yeah!
But I want it to
be something fun,
like Frederica, Taraji.
- [both laughing]
- You're Denise!
I can't wait to only call
you Denise from now on.
Can you please
drop me off at work
so I don't have
to go home first?
You got it.
[Jane] Going to the bathroom.
[Lucy sighs]
[whistling]
I stole some tampons.
- These are good ones.
- [chuckles]
Call me later, and take a shower
because that is a
tough smell right now.
[chuckles]
Good morning, Luce.
- Hi.
- Hi, my love.
You're here early.
Yeah, I was gonna
meditate with a view,
but then I started making
a mood board on Pinterest
so... [chuckles]
Hi. I'm Jane.
Hi, I'm Brittany.
Nice to meet you.
Jane is my best friend.
Brittany's a new masseuse here.
Oh, cool.
- I love your best friend.
- [Lucy chuckles]
She's a real doozy, isn't she?
[Brittany chuckles]
I'll see you later. It
was nice to meet you.
You, too.
Bye, Luce.
Or Denise. Or
whatever your name is.
[indistinct chatter]
[message tone]
[Jane chuckles]
Oh, my God.
Jane, you have a second?
Yeah, of course.
Let me just finish
this work-related text.
I want to talk to
you about something,
and I want you to
listen closely.
I've been going
through your emails
and all of your
electronic communication.
Listen...
We just googled those penises.
No one has that condition.
Ah.
I'm totally kidding.
I honestly don't care
what you email about.
- [laughs]
- [sighs]
Jane, you're from London, right?
Like, I'm sharp enough
to pick up on this twang.
Yes. I mean, I
haven't lived there
since I was, like,
16. But, yes.
Um, how would you feel about
opening up an office there?
Seriously?
Yeah, there's a
chocolate company
that wants to give Cadbury
a real run for its Bunny.
- [laughing]
- [Jane chuckles awkwardly]
Isn't that clever?
I thought of it as
I was saying it.
They want our help
with the campaign,
and I know you'd
be perfect for it.
Honestly, I think you're ready
to have a whole
division to yourself.
That's an amazing offer.
I... [chuckles]
I don't know what to say.
Well, I do. You can say yes.
[exhales deeply]
At least think
about it, all right?
We'll make it worth your while.
- Okay. Thank you so much.
- Yeah.
Yeah, sure, sure.
Get out of here.
Yeah.
Actually, you can leave it open.
Actually, shut it.
Not all the way.
- That's good right there.
- Yep.
Little more.
Perfect.
Did you get my text?
[Jane] Yes. You are
such a strange person.
- [chuckles]
- Can we get drinks later?
Um, yeah. Are you okay?
Yeah, it's just dumb work stuff.
Okay, it's not cancer?
What? No. Goodbye.
- Hey.
- Ooh.
- [cell phone clatters]
- Whoa.
- Sorry. Let me get that.
- Sorry.
[grunts]
- Hmm.
- [phone thuds]
Whoa, that's incredible.
Oh, I just like to doodle.
[laughs] It's better
than a doodle.
I love that you can do that.
- Meg?
- [Meg] Yes?
- Are you ready to head back?
- [Meg] I'm ready.
- [indistinct chatter]
- [upbeat music playing]
Sorry, I was
googling butt herpes.
- Hello, Lucy.
- I got you a tequils.
Oh, God bless you.
Mmm.
Mmm.
What a delicious beverage.
You may now tell me
what happened today.
Wait, before you
guys get into that,
I'm gonna go take a leak
while you two sync your periods.
Mmm! Nailed it. [chuckling]
- Dumb.
- Stupid.
- [Danny] Ah.
- Really stupid.
So, um...
I got called into
Stu's office today.
[chuckling] Did you get fired?
No, I kind of got a promotion.
Jane that is so awesome.
They want to transfer
me to London.
Wait, what?
He wants me to
start up an office
in London.
What did you say?
I said yes.
Wow, that's great.
- Thanks.
- Mmm-hmm.
Crazy, right?
When... When? When
does this happen?
Well, not for, like, six months.
So, it's not like
tomorrow or anything.
Awesome. That's so awesome!
This is so awesome.
Wow. Awesome.
You really deserve this.
I just feel like,
"Why not?" You know?
Like, I've never
been an adult there.
I might like it. I can
take the tube to work.
I've never taken
the tube to work.
[Lucy] Yeah.
What about Danny?
Oh, he's in.
I mean, what else
is he going to do?
He said he could find
some nerdy music blog
to write for over there.
I mean, maybe London
will inspire him
to fucking propose.
You think you're gonna get
engaged while you're there?
Well, I mean... [sighs]
No...
He'll probably wait
another eight years.
[Lucy] Mmm-hmm.
What?
I know it kinda sucks.
I'm so happy for you.
But...
Well... it's gonna
be weird, isn't it?
Not living five minutes
away from each other.
Yeah, but I mean, it's...
- That's... I'm busy, you know?
- Mmm-hmm.
There's, like, all of the
stuff that's going real well,
and all the other
really important things,
and the kids are almost
in college, so...
Uh, how many kids
do you have again?
I have 12 kids.
What are their names again?
They're all named Denise.
- That's right.
- [both chuckle]
Well, honestly, Lucy,
this might be
really good for you.
Start painting again.
Sell some shit.
I won't be here to distract you.
Yeah, totally.
Everything... Jane.
Everything is gonna
be fine, okay?
You're gonna be
fine. I'm fine.
[sobbing]
You promise you're gonna
come back all the time?
[Jane] Yes, of course.
[Lucy continues sobbing]
But do you know when?
Like, what dates?
I don't know exactly, but often.
Cool.
[sniffles]
Do you wipe front to back?
Yeah, you have to
wipe front to back.
Yeah, but some people
wipe all the way
in one motion from
front to back.
No, I do two in the front
and one in the back.
- Yeah.
- Tap-tap one. One tap two.
Yeah, that's what I do.
[sobbing] That's why...
that's why we're
best friends, Jane!
That's why, because...
[continues sobbing]
[Jane] Lucy...
Because we even
wipe the same way!
And now we won't even
be wiping in the same...
[flushing]
- country!
- Okay.
- Let... let's wash our hands.
- [sobbing]
[Lucy sniffles] I love you.
[Jane] Okay, I
have a confession.
Sometimes I blow
my nose in my shirt
when I'm working out.
Oh, okay, well, some
of those are my shirts!
I have a little
confession to make.
- Okay.
- [both laugh]
Sometimes I go
pee in the shower.
Everyone pees in the shower!
- Talk about...
- That's not a good one.
- I have a confession.
- Oh, really?
I kissed Amanda
Newman in tenth grade.
- Okay!
- Yeah.
[Danny] Thousand points
for that confession.
- [Jane] Uh-huh.
- [Danny] Wow.
Wait, what? You
never told me that.
Yeah. Tenth grade,
behind 7-Eleven.
She dared me to do
it and I did it.
How could you not tell me that?
That's a big girl if
you kissed a deal.
- [Danny] Mmm?
- [laughing] What?
I mean, it's a big kiss
if you dealt a girl.
I mean...
- The third way to say that.
- [Jane and Danny laugh]
Why don't you take a little sip
of that water right there, honey?
There you go. Good job.
- [Danny and Jane laugh]
- Yo, was she a good kisser?
- She was pretty good.
- Mmm-hmm?
[Jane] Yeah. She was.
[slurring] You never even said
this to me before, these words.
I never heard them.
Have you ever kissed
a girl before?
No.
Well, if you were
to kiss a girl...
- [Danny] Mmm-hmm.
- Who would it be?
- Who would you kiss?
- Brittany.
Brittany? That's interesting.
- Why is it... Who is...
- Yeah. Yeah.
Who is... Who's Brit-Brit?
She's who does the
massages at my job.
- Is she, uh, gay or straight?
- She's just... I don't know.
Maybe she's straight.
She wears dresses.
Oh, you... Okay. You know
lesbians wear dresses, right?
She said she loved you today.
She is very, very flirty.
She likes to touch me.
Do you know what
she calls her? Luce.
- [Danny] Mmm.
- [Jane] And she's just started working there.
You should do it.
It is not a good idea to make out
with your coworkers, you guys.
Read the news.
Right. I'm going to bed.
You always do that so abruptly.
I know when it's time.
Can we have a sleepover?
I don't... Mmm...
[Jane] You better
come and visit me.
Yeah, I'll bring
you that sandwich
that you really love from
that shitty place on Sunset.
[sighs contentedly] Thank you.
I'll put it in a cooler.
It'll stay good on the
plane for 11 hours, right?
For sure.
[sniffles]
[Lucy sobbing softly]
Are you crying?
- [voice breaking] No.
- Lucy...
I promise it's not
gonna be that different.
[continues sobbing softly]
- [sniffles]
- Don't cry.
We can FaceTime and
talk just like always.
[continues sobbing]
Whoa. What's going on?
Lucy...
[sighs]
You know, when I said that I
would make out with Brittany...
Yes?
I really would.
I didn't think you
were lying about that.
But, like... [sobs]
I really would.
[Lucy sobs]
Like... Like, really?
Yeah, I think so.
Oh, my God. Why didn't
you say anything?
I just felt easier to
keep it buried inside.
Fuck, Lucy. You can't
keep this inside.
- You'll explode.
- [sighs]
I hate this.
[sighs deeply]
Have you talked to
anyone about this?
How long have you felt this way?
A while.
And you never acted on it?
Like, not even in secret?
[Lucy] Oh!
I feel so stupid.
Like... [sighs] I should
have figured this out by now.
You can't look at it that way.
Yes, I can, Jane.
I'm 32 years old.
There's no timeline
to figuring it out.
People figure this out
when they're, like, nine.
Nine?
When I was nine, I
pretended I was a puppy
and I would only bark at people.
Yeah, that sounds strange
to say it out loud.
I feel so stupid.
[sobbing] And I don't
even know what I am.
I don't even know if I'm...
if I'm really that way,
and I'm just afraid to admit it,
or if I'm not, and
I just... What?
I don't ever, like, date boys.
I mean, men. I don't know.
Well, maybe you're both.
[sighs]
No. I just should've
figured it out.
When you kissed Amanda
Newman, did you like it?
Oh, God, I guess. I had a
Zima. I thought I was drunk.
But you weren't like,
"Maybe I'm gay?"
I don't know. I
wasn't gonna, like,
be with Amanda Newman.
- Why? Why not?
- 'Cause...
Well, it was just a dumb kiss.
So, when you kiss Danny,
are you thinking, like,
"I'm so straight.
I love dudes?"
Usually, I'm like, "Brush your
teeth. I can taste Subway."
Seriously.
I don't know if it's
so simple, Lucy.
How have you felt
sleeping with guys?
Weird.
Weird like you think
everything is weird
or weird like you
just didn't like it?
Weird like that must be the
reason I've barely done it.
Did you think that I was?
A vagina lover?
- [tuts and scoffs]
- It crossed my mind.
I'm not. I don't... I...
I don't love
vaginas. I'm not...
You did own a Volvo
in high school.
- You did.
- Jane, Volvos are
- the safest car.
- Okay.
[scoffs]
Shit, Lucy, I'm sorry. I'm...
I'm mad I never brought it up
if it was hurting you this much.
It's okay.
I probably would have
just lied anyway.
Well, now we know.
And now, we've got to get you
to make out with Brit-Brit.
I don't even know
if she likes girls.
Well, then we'll find
you some girls who do.
Lucy, from what I understand,
and I believe this to be true,
all lesbians know each other.
They've all slept
with each other.
So, for you to
enter into the fray,
you're gonna be the star
of the lesbian community.
I don't like that word.
I know. "Community."
[both chuckle]
I'm scared.
Of course it's scary.
But you think a lot
of things are scary.
You still scared of how
Salt-N-Pepa whisper in Push It?
[chuckles] Yes. Very.
Look, I'd be scared to
touch someone else's vagina.
[chuckles]
But I'm not leaving this
country till you do.
[inhales sharply]
- I love you.
- I love you.
[groans softly]
Luce, you okay? What's wrong?
Oh, yeah, I just had
too much tequila.
Oh, give me your hand.
Give me your hand.
I know a cure for a
hangover headache.
Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow.
What'd you do last night?
- Did you have a hot date?
- Mmm, no.
Uh, Jane told me she's
moving to London,
so I got shit-faced.
Oh, Luce, I'm sorry,
but, um, I mean,
that... that...
Well, it sucks.
It's fine. It's okay. Um...
Probably not
helping my headache.
- Is that too much?
- No, it's so nice.
Well, we can hang out more.
Unless you...
- Oh, no.
- Don't want to.
[laughs] No, no. I'd love to.
[laughs] Okay, good.
Because I'm a lot of fun.
More later?
[softly] No.
[sighs]
[scoffs]
[sighs]
[laughing]
Have you ever fucked
an Uber driver?
- No.
- That's so something
- Drew would do.
- [Jane laughs]
You know Drew.
Which one's Drew?
I've talked about him.
He's the one who only
talks on speakerphone.
He's the fucking worst.
- I'd still fuck him, though.
- [Jane and Kat laugh]
Maybe I should try to do that
- before we leave for London.
- Mmm.
Oh, you're gonna
go to London, too?
- Yeah, I told you that.
- Mmm-mmm. No, you didn't.
I can't wait to go
and be on Jane's team!
I'm so excited! Girls.
[in accented English]
Say Vegemite! "Vegemite."
That's Australian.
Love It. Storying
it. Posting it.
I'm fully going bi
when I go to London.
The girls are so
fucking hot there.
Wait. Are you,
uh, seeing anyone?
Uh, no, not right now.
Did you guys know I've only
been with seven people?
- [Jane] Really?
- Isn't that crazy?
My number's nine, including
Danny. And I feel like...
Danny needs to let
you get to ten.
- Right?
- He needs to.
How many people
have you slept with?
Um...
- Um...
- [Kat] Too many to count?
- No, no, no. I...
- I wish I was like you,
but we have the same
hair, so I'm on my way.
[laughs awkwardly]
[Kat] I love this shirt!
- Oh, really?
- Mmm-hmm.
- Thanks.
- Where'd you get it?
It's probably from the
Gap. Is it from the Gap?
Aw, the Gap.
Um, actually, I think it is.
Aw, the Gap.
[chuckles]
- J? J?
- Hmm?
You have something
in your teeth.
- Oh. Thank you.
- [Kat] Perfect. You got it.
I always tell people when they
have something in their teeth.
I think it's like the
most important thing
- you can do for a friend.
- I totally agree.
I think it's so important.
I mean, it's not like the most
important thing you can do.
I, like... I didn't see it.
I would have said
something if I saw it, J.
Will you come visit us?
Will you come to London?
Will you come?
Well, yeah, I hope
so. We'll see.
Wait, guys. I have a
friend from college
who knows a bunch of the royals.
We should follow
them on Instagram.
Jane hates Instagram.
I don't hate it. I just
don't go on it a ton.
Well, I hope you like big,
random dinner parties.
- Yeah, I love!
- What?
You absolutely hate
dinner parties.
This is different. When
you're abroad, it's different.
When you're abroad,
everything's different.
Everything is different
when you're abroad.
I can't wait to
meet Jane's family!
- [Jane] Isn't Kat the best?
- [Lucy] She's the best.
[Jane] You hate her.
I don't hate her,
but she's just a lot.
Yeah, but I like it.
You gals are gonna have
fun in London, aren't you?
Oh, I almost forgot.
I got muffins.
Ooh!
- Bluebs?
- A bluebs and a bran.
We each have half of one now
and half when we're done.
I can't have a whole one now?
No, half and half.
And then we have a snack
waiting for us when we're done.
It's the smart way to do it.
It's the controlling
way to do it.
I'm the thoughtful one
who bought muffins.
[sighs] Which one do you want?
Bran or bluebs?
Bran, obviously.
End with the bluebs.
I guess I'll have bran.
[Jane] We need to
figure out your type.
[Lucy] No, no.
Why does she touch me so much?
- You mean Brit-Brit?
- Yeah.
'Cause she wants to
have sex with you.
[Lucy] It's like way
more than normal.
Look, here's the bottom line.
You can use this chick
- as a sexual portal.
- Why?
But this isn't a
lasting relationship.
Touch her stuff, roll around.
Then we've got to
get you on those apps
so people know their
way around your area.
I do not want to do that.
Can I ask you something?
Why don't you think you have
to date like everyone else?
No one's gonna ring on
your doorbell one day,
looking for a
wishy-washy lesbian
who might want to
try some stuff.
- You don't know that for sure.
- [panting]
Come on, two at a time.
Squeeze your cheeks.
- [continues panting]
- This is different.
How is it different?
Because, what if somebody
I know is on there
and then they're like,
"What? She's gay?"
- Then what?
- Then everybody knows.
Great!
It's not like people know you
as this tried and
true heterosexual.
You never let anyone set
you up, you don't date.
People will be like,
"Oh, good. She
figured it out."
Do you think people
are thinking that?
I don't know! [laughs]
Everyone is just gonna
want you to be happy.
What if I'm not
meant to be happy?
Oh, my God.
I'm running up there, and
I am not coming back down.
Fine.
- I'm sitting here.
- [groans]
Have I ever been happy?
I don't even know
what makes me happy.
I'm nervous all the time.
And I'm scared of everything.
Lucy, these are
lame fucking excuses
so you don't have to step
outside of your comfort zone.
You're more than
capable of being happy.
Don't spew that bullshit at me.
I'm being vulnerable right
now and you're attacking me.
Squeeze. You're not even
comfortable in your comfort zone.
So, why not just
try something new?
You try 20 different
flavors of ice cream
before you settle on a
single scoop. Do that.
Ice cream is different
than a vagina.
How do you know?
You don't know.
Yeah, I do know.
Otherwise, it would be called
vagice cream. [laughing]
Am I okay?
I don't want to be this
thing that's different.
I don't want to have to tell
everybody this big thing. It's...
I know that it's fine, and
no one cares, but I care,
and I'm late.
It's so late in life.
Then don't waste any more time.
I just wish I didn't
think about her so much.
You think about her a lot?
Lucy, you're gonna be fine.
Let's go to a gay bar one
night and have a look around.
I'm sure there's a place with
some kind of lesbian jamboree.
The Womb.
You know it's called the Womb.
I've never been more
proud of you. We're going.
[chuckles] No. I'm
not ready for that.
Please, it'll be
fun. It's research.
Can I please have the other
half of my muffin now?
And do you want to mention
how much better it is
to end with bluebs?
- [sighs]
- Don't ignore me, Denise!
You gotta start shaving
above da knees, Denise.
[sighs]
[keyboard clacking]
- Hey, pretty. Whatcha doing?
- [gasps] Oh, um, just...
I was just googling things.
- Totally random.
- [sighs]
Just totally random stuff.
Oh, Luce, you are so talented.
- What?
- [chuckles]
Like, what are you
even doing here?
[chuckles]
Good question.
Actually, I paint.
That's what I like to do.
Well, I want to
see your paintings.
Oh... [chuckles]
No. I mean, I don't
have any of them here.
I didn't think you
had them with you.
- [both chuckle]
- Can you imagine?
I just pull out, like,
12 from under the table.
[both laugh]
I wanna see your paintings
because I bet they're amazing.
Yeah, maybe one day.
Well, when are we
gonna hang out?
Um...
whenever.
Okay. Tonight?
Sure, I can do tonight.
I can make that work.
Okay, well, I'll cook.
- Squee! I'm so excited.
- [both chuckle]
[breathes deeply]
[softly] Bitch.
[phone thuds]
Oh, my God. All the time.
[music playing over speakers]
- Really?
- Yes.
Like, boner after boner
after sad little boner.
Wow.
Do they ever ask you to, like...
diddle them? [chuckles]
- Some.
- [chuckles]
I've diddled.
I diddled. One time.
- You did?
- [laughing] Yes.
I mean, I had to try
it at some point.
And he was cute.
So, it was fine.
Wow. Did he tip you?
Oh, fuck, yeah.
But that was it.
That was all I did.
That's why I'm
saying. Like, really,
I wanna open a
female-only studio.
They're just...
They're better.
I bet not so many hairy backs.
- [laughs] You'd be surprised.
- [chuckles]
No, they're, um...
They're much softer.
- [Lucy and Brittany laughing]
- [Brittany] Oh, my God!
What's your longest
relationship?
I don't know. Not long.
Like, months. A
couple of months.
Have you ever been in love?
Mmm!
- Really?
- No.
Oh, I'm kinda jealous. Like,
you have something great
to look forward to.
- Have you?
- Oh, yeah.
My college boyfriend.
I was obsessed with him,
and I thought that, like,
if he broke up with
me, I would die.
Like, literally die.
What happened?
He moved to Portland,
then he broke up with me.
And then I didn't die, so...
- Cheers to that.
- [chuckles]
And then I realized
that I should probably
have sex with more people.
So...
[Lucy] Mmm-hmm. Mmm-hmm.
Do you miss him?
Mmm... No.
I mean, I see him sometimes.
I feel like he's a weirdo.
And I think that he's gay, so...
Really?
I don't know.
It's a spectrum, right?
Gay, straight, bi. What
does it even all mean?
I think in that case,
it means you're either
gay, straight or bi.
[laughing] You're funny.
- [laughing]
- You're funny.
I mean, I think everyone falls
somewhere on the spectrum.
Like, I know I'm
on the spectrum.
You're on the spectrum,
don't you think?
- Probably.
- Hmm. Love is love.
[clicks tongue]
Have you ever made
out with a girl?
You haven't?
- No.
- What?
Why do you say that?
No, I just, like... I assumed.
Because you're a
woman with the times.
- What?
- [both laughing]
What does that mean?
I don't know. I
just feel like...
everyone should try
it at some point.
Have you?
No.
Not yet.
Show me one of your paintings.
Um...
And then I'll leave
after. I promise.
You don't have to go.
Uh, I mean, you don't
have to do that.
Okay.
- Just one.
- Fine.
[Lucy sighs]
- There's...
- Ooh.
This is so cool. [chuckles]
I love that you paint.
Oh, my God.
- Lucy.
- [chuckles nervously]
They're old.
They're really old.
I haven't painted
in a long time.
This is what you
should be doing.
- I don't know.
- [chuckles]
[inhales deeply]
I should go.
This was fun.
- [Lucy] Yeah. Yeah.
- Right? [laughs]
Um, we should do it more.
- [Lucy] Totally. Yeah.
- Yeah.
Good night.
Night-night.
"Night-night?" What?
[Sky] When you let go and start
to embrace who you really are,
that's when you start to open up
your hearts and your bodies.
- [sobbing softly]
- Today, I want you to remember
to lead with hope
and not with fear.
Fear only holds you back.
I don't know. I didn't
ask her to stay.
Maybe I should have.
[Jane] I don't like this.
You have shaky voice.
No, I don't.
- Yes, you do.
- God, it's just weird.
It's all... weird. [sighs]
I'm weird. I hate this.
How close was the kiss?
Like, close.
Show me where?
Like, here.
That's pretty close.
I don't know about this bitch.
If she's fucking with you,
I'll fuck her shit up.
Do you think she's gay?
I have no idea.
But, like, if you
had to guess...
I mean, I've never kissed
a platonic girlfriend
on a mouth corner.
[Lucy sighs]
She said women have soft backs.
Ew. Jesus. What? And
you drank white wine?
Lucy, I'm genuinely alarmed.
Maybe she's more
confused than I am.
Maybe.
But you need someone who knows.
Two people trying to figure out
if they're lesbians together,
that might be the worst
idea I've ever heard.
That's why we're
going to the Womb.
- No.
- Yes.
- I don't want to.
- We're finding you
- a girlfriend before I leave.
- Please.
["Heart to Break" by
Kim Petras playing]
[loud chatter]
Heart to break...
I'd make a great lesbian.
That's the real
shame in all of this.
How are you doing?
Good. Great.
This girl's cute. She's
cute. She's cute, she's cute.
Hi.
I'm Jane. This is Lucy.
Hi.
Do you wanna come dance with me?
Um, I... [hesitating]
I don't... I, uh...
I, um... I have a
drink. I'm drinking it.
- So, um...
- Okay.
- Go with her.
- What?
Why did you do that to me?
Oh, my God! Because
you never do anything.
Come on, let's have some fun.
Even if it means
That I'll never
Put myself back together
Gonna give you
My heart to break
Even if I'll end
up in shatters
Baby, it doesn't matter
Gonna give you
My heart to break
I tried to fight
But I can't help it
Don't care if this
is My worst mistake
'Cause no one else
Could do it better
And that's why I give
you My heart to break
[sobbing]
[cell phone chimes]
[sighing]
[man] Right, so, I thought
we'd have a quick debrief...
[softly] He sounds
so fucking hot.
- [Jane chuckles]
- Jeremy from accounts.
Uh, there were a few...
[chimes]
- And there are...
- [Kat] Yeah.
Some responsibilities
that I'm gonna run
up the flagpole
and see if they will
fall in your lap.
Yeah, we can have
that by tomorrow.
They want us to focus on it.
So, I'm just giving you
a heads-up for that.
[Kat] Uh-huh!
- [Kat laughs] - [man continues
speaking indistinctly]
[sighs]
[man] ...we can
tie up together.
I don't think they need to
be as dispersed as they are.
But that's just
the best practice.
- Uh-huh.
- You know?
Whatcha doin'?
Oh, nothing. I'm just...
Dumb online
shopping. [chuckles]
That one's kinda cute.
Oh, I'm not really a...
hole in the shoulders
kind of girl.
[chuckles] Well, you only need
one good shoulder
for that shirt.
- And you have two.
- Oh?
- Mmm-hmm.
- Thanks.
I just had the best idea.
- Does it involve my shoulders?
- Yeah, it does.
We should have a try-on party.
What's a try-on party?
Like, try-on-my-clothes party.
I love fashion.
I should've been a stylist.
Whatever. That's not even
what we're talking about.
We'll have some wine.
You try on my clothes
that I never wear
and if you like them,
you can keep them.
- Did you just make that up?
- Mmm-mmm.
Everybody has try-on parties.
Really? I... I don't
think that's true.
It is true!
Doesn't it sound fun, though?
Do you have a lot of pants?
Lucy, this is like a...
No. It's like you need
more colors and pattern.
Introduce new
things to your life.
[Kat] And you CC'd me on that?
- Yeah.
- Okay.
Hi. They didn't
have any, um...
[gasps] Hi!
- Oh, it's so good to see you!
- [Lucy] Hi.
I love this jacket.
Thanks. Thank you.
I love your dress?
- I designed it.
- No way.
- Yeah.
- That's so nice.
- How are you?
- I'm good.
- How are you?
- I'm so good.
I'm so excited for my girl.
Get your food and eat with us.
Oh, no, no. You guys go do
your cute little
thing. [chuckles]
I can't believe you just
asked her to eat with us.
Oh, stop. I knew she wouldn't.
Well, I'm sure she'd love to be
in the middle of our
little "cute little thing."
I have so much shit
to get through.
They just asked if I
could leave earlier.
- I'm not going to.
- Good.
Can they send
Kat? Like, today?
I'll go pack her things.
All right. Enough
with that already.
All right, well, maybe
I'm just a little bit sad
that my best friend is
moving across the world.
Well, maybe you could
be happy for me.
That's what best friends
are supposed to do.
- I am happy for you.
- Then act like it.
Are you serious right now?
When am I not happy for you?
Ooh. Ooh.
I'm not doing this now.
Oh, you're not doing this now?
When would be better
for you to do this?
Since everything is
always on your schedule.
I'm at work.
I don't know what
happens at a spa,
but we're professionals here.
Oh, nice. You got a dig in.
Any other judgments
you want to share?
- Oh, please.
- What?
You want to boss me
around a little bit more?
- Boss...
- Tell me how to live my life?
Boss you around?
You're free to do whatever
the fuck you want.
Oh, well...
I know you take that to heart.
What's that supposed to mean?
You always do whatever
the fuck you want.
You feel like making out
with some girl at a club,
then you make out with
some girl at a club.
She asked if she could
kiss me, so I said yes.
Because it's more
fun to say yes.
If you wanted to, you
could've done the same thing.
Why? So you could tell
me I was doing it wrong?
Oh, my God, Lucy, do
shit however you want.
I am not your keeper.
What? You're always
controlling me.
You control everything I do.
You told me when I could
eat a fucking muffin.
Yeah, because if I didn't
tell you what to do,
you'd probably never
leave the house.
You can't make any
decisions on your own.
You don't do anything.
You can't even decide what
gender of the human race
- you want to fuck.
- Fuck you.
You probably do want to fuck me.
- What?
- Everyone thinks that.
- [shushing]
- What are you talking about?
We're not a couple, Lucy.
Nobody thinks we're a
couple. What? Are you insane?
People think we're,
like, confusing twins.
What... what the fuck
is wrong with you?
What the fuck is wrong with you?
You can't even handle the fact
that I have another friend.
Oh, what a fun friend.
[Jane] You know what? At
least Kat talks about things.
[Lucy] Yeah. It was really
thrilling to find out
that she can suck a
dick and order Postmates
- at the same time.
- That was thrilling.
And it's fun to hear
crazy fucking stories
instead of wallowing in
sorrow the whole time.
At some point you're gonna have
to pull your head
out of your own ass.
You think Kat could
teach me how to do that?
I bet you she's tried.
Real friends tell
each other shit.
I tell you everything.
Except the most important thing.
It's not about you, Jane.
I'm not saying it's about me.
Christ, if anything,
it's all about you.
The only thing you can focus on
is a lunatic who
touches you a lot,
whose job it is to touch
people for a living.
But this is what you do.
Turn everything around
into this self-pity party.
It can be really scary
to try new things.
When's the last time
you ever took a risk?
I'm moving to fucking London.
Yeah. You're moving back
to where you're from
with your boyfriend,
and on a fucking
expense account.
That's not taking a
risk. That's a whim.
It's an opportunity
to advance my career.
Do you ever think about actually
doing something for a living?
You know, it's hard
to be a painter
if you stop fucking painting.
- Fuck you!
- Fuck you!
[Lucy] You know what?
I wouldn't fuck you. If you
were the last person on Earth,
I wouldn't fuck you.
[Jane] I feel sorry for you.
Don't. You don't need to.
You obviously don't
know anything about me.
Well, it's not
because I didn't try.
Have a good trip.
- [Danny] Just call her.
- Oh, God.
When do you think the
last time I wore this was?
When you filmed The Wiz?
I don't feel joy.
How could you? It's very ugly.
This is hers.
- Whose?
- Hers.
Her name is Lucy.
She's your best friend.
What, we can't say
her name anymore?
She probably
doesn't even know...
She has, like, 4,000 of these.
[sighs]
[sighs]
[Danny] So, why don't
you just call her?
Tell her you have it. Make up.
Maybe you won't be sad.
I'm not calling
her. I'm not sad.
I'm done. She's
never happy for me.
So, what, you're just
gonna go to London
and never talk to
your best friend?
Probably.
[sighs]
Oh, I hate this stupid sweater!
Okay. All right, listen, this
is your favorite sweater.
Now I think we're just
misplacing our feelings.
I just wanted her
to move forward.
I know. But it's
not up to you.
Well, it should be.
You were saying she
called you bossy, right?
Aw, come here.
I know. I know, I know, I
know, I know. Come here.
I'm sorry, baby.
Maybe we should go earlier.
Everything is gonna be okay.
It's just a stressful
time right now.
[indistinct chatter]
[waiter] Are we
waiting on your friend?
Mmm-mmm. No, it's just me.
Oh. What can I get you?
Um, I will have a veggie burger.
Mmm-hmm. That it?
Um, and an iced coffee, please.
Mmm. Cream?
Yes, please. Oh,
no, actually...
Just... Just black.
[Lucy clears throat]
[indistinct chatter]
[people laughing]
- [Brittany] Ta-da!
- [laughs]
Try-on party!
- Oh, wow. Time to try me on.
- Ooh.
Or whatever.
- Wow.
- Here.
Put this one on. I'm
gonna go grab wine.
[whispers] Oh, my God.
[wine bottle opening]
I feel like we need music.
[music playing over speakers]
Ooh, and atmosphere.
Um...
Much better.
There we go.
Look at your cute little body.
- [Lucy] Oh, my God.
- [laughs]
Wait. Okay.
I'm gonna help you.
Um...
Is that your... Did you...
Why did you put
it over your head?
- [Lucy] I don't know.
- You could've just, like,
- stepped into it here. Ooh.
- [chuckles]
It's gonna look so good
though, once it's on.
- Oh, sorry!
- [Lucy exhales]
Oh, there's a zipper.
[laughing]
- [laughs awkwardly]
- That's so funny!
- [Lucy] That's so funny.
- Here we go.
Oh, my God. Yes, babe!
- Wow.
- You look so hot.
- What?
- I don't use that word like that.
Luce, you have no
idea how hot you are.
Like, seriously. Turn
around. Look at your ass.
You have to keep that.
I'm a genius. I know.
Where do you even wear
something like this?
Like the clurb.
Where? Is that a restaurant?
The clurb. It's, like, a
funny word for the club.
- Oh, the club? That's right.
- Yes!
- I don't...
- You're keeping that.
This one's next.
Let's take a break.
Let's take a pot break.
- Okay.
- For the anxiety.
You're right.
You know, colors
look good on you.
- [Lucy] Gray's a color.
- [both chuckle]
I can't stop thinking
about your paintings.
[scoffs] Please.
No, seriously. Did you, like,
go to fancy art
school or something?
No. [chuckles]
Why not?
[Lucy] I don't know.
Well, why don't
you be a painter?
I don't know.
Why don't you
really try fashion?
[Brittany] 'Cause it's hard.
And I'm lazy.
And it's just like a hobby.
But it's a tragedy
because I would've been,
like, a major success.
[chuckling]
But you're different.
["Etc Etc" by Roe playing]
I feel like there's
something going on here.
Yeah?
So...
Yeah.
[Lucy] What are you doing?
[Brittany] I'm gonna go pee.
[door opens]
[door closes]
[exhales]
[toilet flushing]
[door opens]
[door closes]
I should, um... I
should probably go.
Really?
[Brittany chuckles]
Yeah, I just have
a lot of errands
to run and stuff,
but thanks for having me over.
That was really fun.
Don't you want to stay
a little while longer?
- [Brittany laughs]
- Just a little.
Yeah, I do. I...
I gotta go.
Well, thanks for...
- everything.
- [both laugh]
Go back to bed.
Boop.
[door opens]
[door closes]
[Kat] I love that she thinks
we were sisters in a past life.
I've always thought
that about us.
[woman] Bye, see you guys...
[Kat] Bye!
- Fucking love that class!
- [Jane] Me, too.
[Kat and Jane continue
conversing indistinctly]
Are you sure? You
don't have to do this.
No, I'm positive.
I actually think it would be
really helpful to
get there sooner.
Great. [chuckles]
And Kat's agreed
to go early also.
Even better! [chuckles]
Anyway, let me know if
you need anything, Jane.
And in the meantime,
I'll make sure
everything is set up
for you across the lake.
Well, thank you again.
No, thank you, Jane.
You're saving me a
crapload of money.
- [chuckles]
- Start packing. Yeah?
[door opens]
Hey.
- Oh, hi.
- How are you feeling?
Good. You?
Great. Except,
whose idea was it
to drink and smoke so much?
- Yours.
- Oh, yeah. Oops.
Wrong folder.
- I'm still high.
- [both chuckle]
[Lucy] What are
you doing tonight?
[Brittany] I can't wait
for this day to be over.
Hmm?
Oh, nothing. I was, um...
[sighs] I need a nap.
[Lucy chuckles]
- Me, too.
- Yeah.
Um... Are things weird?
Between us?
Yeah.
No. Why would they be weird?
I had so much fun.
Like, I always
wanted to try that
and we did. [chuckles]
Maybe we can do it again.
Sure. I mean, yeah. I...
I'm free tonight
if you want to...
I mean, I know it's last minute.
Well, I can't tonight, but soon.
- Cool.
- Cool.
[cell phone chimes]
[sighs shakily]
Happy birthday to you
[chuckles]
Happy birthday To
my lovely and funny
And-sometimes-mad-at-me-
For-no-reason-at-all baby
[both chuckle]
Happy birthday to you
Aw! Thank you, my babe.
You're welcome. I
used to work at IHOP,
- so I know the recipe.
- [both chuckle]
You can share some
of that if you want.
- No, I can't.
- Okay.
- It's your birthday.
- Good to know.
What was I thinking?
What was I thinking?
Hmm. What if she doesn't call?
[laughs] She will!
But what if she doesn't?
Baby, she will.
Come here. Look.
[kissing] You know what?
If she doesn't call,
you always got me.
It's not the same.
- None taken.
- I didn't say, "No offense."
Yet you should have.
You know, we've never not spoken
on our birthdays for
our entire friendship.
I don't even think
we've spent one apart.
Baby...
she is going to call you.
Well, what if she's
sad and she needs me?
[hesitates] Then you both are
gonna talk about all of that
when she calls. Okay?
- Okay. Okay.
- Okay. Right.
Yeah.
- That's for me? Thank you.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- Mmm! Mmm!
- You're a monster.
[door closes]
[Brittany] What's up?
Nothing.
It's Jane's birthday today
and, I don't know, we're
still in a fight, so...
- Aw, that sucks.
- Yeah.
What are you up to tonight?
Mmm, I may have
dinner with a friend.
My dumb ex texted me
saying he was in town,
so he might stop by here.
Cool.
Where is this stuff?
Um, bottom drawer.
[drawer opening]
Thank you. You the best.
[sighs]
[line ringing]
[whispering] Please
don't pick up.
Please don't pick up.
Please don't pick up.
[over recording]
Hey, it's Jane.
Leave a message. Thank you.
Hi, um...
This is me. Uh, it's Lucy.
Um... I'm just calling to say,
uh, happy birthday to you,
and, um, many, many great days.
Uh...
I hope you're doing good.
And I will see you soon.
I mean, talk to you soon.
Happy birthday.
- [sighs]
- [Brittany laughs]
[man] You look great.
- Okay. Look at you.
- I can't believe
- how long it's been.
- You look so good.
[man speaking indistinctly]
- [Brittany] You're hilarious.
- Yeah?
[Lucy] I'm just calling to
say happy birthday to you,
and, um, many, many great days.
Uh, I hope you're doing good.
And I will see you soon.
I mean, talk to you soon.
Happy birthday.
[Lucy] Hi, um, this is me.
Uh, it's Lucy...
[Stu] Jane?
Hey, when you have a second,
can I see you in my office?
- Sure. I'll be right there.
- Okay, thanks.
You guys, she
totally fell for it.
She's coming. She fell
for it. Here she comes.
- Surprise!
- [all] Surprise!
Happy birthday! Make a
wish for London Town.
I told them no cake, so
I'm not tempted to eat any.
- But I love cake.
- [camera clicking]
Sorry. I don't want it.
Can you turn to your left?
- Happy birthday.
- [Jane] Thank you.
I have a little
something for you.
A credit
to the Tate Modern gift shop.
It's been in my wallet
for about five years.
Thank you so much, Mr. Davis.
You deserve it.
Have a safe trip.
Oh, I don't leave for
another three weeks.
- I'm gonna say goodbye now.
- Okay.
- Open it.
- Oh.
You didn't have to
get me anything.
[camera shutter clicking]
Hammock Sanctuary?
- Have you been?
- No.
Oh, my God, you're
gonna love it.
It's a mind-body
new vibes retreat.
And everything's in a hammock.
You eat in a hammock,
you sleep in a hammock,
you live in a hammock.
You could have that privilege.
Oh, my! Uh...
Wh... where is it?
In the middle of the woods,
totally off the grid.
And you're not even supposed
to bring your phone,
but I will for Insta, obviously,
'cause I'm not a
fucking psychopath.
Smile. Say, "Hammock girls."
Hammock gir... I
need to hear it.
[both] Hammock girls.
[Danny] All right,
so, is this a cult?
'Cause it sounds like a cult.
It was a gift. What
was I supposed to say?
You say, "No, thank you,
white lady. I'm good."
[laughing]
[indistinct conversation
at next table]
Lucy's not here.
I know. I'm just...
- looking at...
- What?
- Something.
- Okay.
[Jane chuckles]
I think it's nice
that she called.
Maybe you should call her back.
I think you should.
She doesn't even know
that I'm leaving earlier.
You should tell her.
- Did you already tell her?
- Me?
No! Nah. Mmm-mmm.
Mmm-mmm.
You're being weird. Why
are you being weird?
Why is everyone being
so fucking weird?
- [Danny clears throat]
- What?
I don't know. I...
don't think I could go.
That's fine. You
can come later.
Yeah.
- Fine. That's fine.
- What?
- I don't think I could go.
- [laughs]
I just said you
can come whenever.
I mean "go."
Like... at all.
- I'm sorry. I'm so sorry.
- What are you talking about?
I don't want to talk
about this right now.
Well, you're already
talking about it,
so... [stammering] can
you please continue?
My life... is here.
- I'm part of your life.
- Yes, yes. Of course.
I just mean... my job.
And my family and my friends.
You didn't even ask
me if I wanted to go.
You just assumed I would.
Ah, fuck it. I've just been
thinking about this so much.
And I love you, and I
want to be with you.
I really do, but...
I don't think I
could do it there.
Maybe, you know,
after a year I'll go.
Or maybe you'll come back,
make it work.
Have a great celebration.
[sighs]
[sighs]
[cell phone chimes]
[sighs]
[breathes shakily]
[Brittany] Hey.
- Hi.
- You got a sec?
Yeah, I sure do.
I'm here till 5:00.
[chuckles] Um...
I just wanted to talk to
you to let you know...
that I'm gonna be going
to Portland in a month.
Yeah, and I'll probably be
there for a little while.
Great.
- For the ex?
- Yeah.
I don't know if we're,
like... getting back together
or if this is the worst
idea in the world...
[laughs]
But I just... I wanted
to tell you because...
It's okay. Yeah.
Well, 'cause you...
'Cause you make the schedule.
Right.
Yeah. Mmm-hmm. Thank you.
- Are we okay?
- Mmm-hmm.
- Yeah, we're okay.
- Okay.
Cool.
Love ya.
[somber music playing]
[shuffling]
[music continues playing]
Are you serious?
[music playing
faintly over speakers]
Wow.
I wasn't expecting that.
Are you sure?
And you're just
realizing this recently?
I think I've known for a while.
Have you been with girls?
Mmm-hmm. One.
Did you like it?
I think maybe I liked it a
little bit more than she did.
[Ben] Mmm.
Do you want me to destroy her?
[chuckles]
I'm not really sure what to say.
You can say anything.
So, do you have a type?
[chuckles] No. I don't know.
I like brunettes with long hair
who are attracted to women.
- [laughs]
- It's funny,
I always felt like
you treated me
like your gay best friend.
But, uh, it turns
out you're mine.
Oh, I'm sorry.
I'm sorry that I...
[indistinct chatter]
couldn't tell you.
I'm sorry about the girl.
It's all good.
Good night, Ben.
- Come on.
- [chuckles]
["True Love Will Find You in the
End" by Priscilla Ahn playing]
True love will
find you In the end
You'll find out Just
who was your friend
Don't be sad
I know you will...
Oh, my aunt is a nurse.
That's... I don't know
how you guys do it.
I'm not cool with
needles. [chuckles]
Oh, but it's so satisfying
when you get the vein.
Right.
True love will find
you In the end...
[woman] So, what do you do?
Um, I'm...
I'm an artist.
[slurring] Bathroom.
- Whoa!
- [thudding]
I'm fine. I'm fine.
Oh, shit. [chuckles]
'Cause true love
Is searching too...
[laughs]
I would fuck Helen Mirren
and I'd kill Angelina.
You would fuck Helen Mirren?
That's crazy.
- No, I'll get it.
- No!
[both chuckle]
Uh, no, I'm gonna get it.
You can get the next one.
Okay.
We can go for a small pizza.
Wow.
That's generous of you.
But no sides, okay?
- Just tap water. That's it.
- [laughs]
True love will
find you In the end
Are you ready For the
weekend of your life?
With the hammock Come
with me to a hammock
Have a hammock
Sit in a hammock
Enjoy it Are you ready?
- Yeah.
- Yeah?
[gong sounding]
[wind chimes tinkling]
- Welcome... to the Hammock Sanctuary.
- [thunder rumbling]
Like the bosoms of
our foremothers,
the hammock cradles us.
If the trees of the
forest are our legs...
the hammock is our vulva.
Let's close our eyes
and allow ourselves
to be enveloped by
our mesh cocoons.
We are all seeds
of the universe,
and soon we will begin to bloom.
[thunder rumbling]
Let's close our eyes.
Let's close them.
- And we'll close them.
- Okay.
- Okay, close your eyes.
- I will.
Well, you're not closing them.
As we open our throat chakra,
I encourage you all
to release your voice
as ferociously as
the Vishuddha...
- [woman screams]
- will allow.
[yelling loudly]
That was nice, Kat.
[woman yelling]
Would it help if I rocked you?
[Jane] No, I'm okay, thank you.
- [instructor] Let me rock you.
- [Jane] I'm good.
It'd be best if I rocked you.
[man screaming]
You need to let it
out. It's in here.
- [people screaming]
- It's right in there.
It needs to come out.
[yelling loudly]
Okay, well... Jesus Christ.
[chuckles softly]
[cell phone vibrating]
[sighs softly]
Hi.
[indistinct chatter]
[slow song playing
over speakers]
What are you gonna get?
Um., maybe an omelet.
- That sounds good.
- Mmm.
[waiter] You girls ready?
Yeah. May I have an omelet
with tomato and spinach?
- [waiter] Mmm-hmm.
- Please. And an iced coffee.
Thank you.
I'll do the Chinese chicken
salad and a green tea. Thanks.
No more veggie burgers?
Just switching it up.
- Wild!
- [both chuckle]
So, when do you leave?
I'm going early, actually.
I leave next week.
Next... Wow, that's...
What made you want to do that?
Danny's not going anymore.
You and I were in a fight.
It's easier to leave than deal
with those things, I suppose.
Danny's not going?
Why? What happened?
He said he likes his life here.
Which is fine.
I'm sorry. Are you okay?
It's fine.
It's fine.
What have you been up to?
Well, I... I quit the spa.
Holy shit! That's amazing,
Lucy. Good for you.
Thanks. I started
painting again.
- Really?
- Mmm-hmm.
That's great!
And I've been on
some girl dates.
What? You don't
start with that?
- I'm just taking it slow.
- Wow!
Okay, you're playing it so cool.
What happened with BB Brit-Brit?
Oh, BB Brit-Brit, yes.
Um, she's straight.
Ah, I doubt that very much.
Yeah.
We had a try-on party.
- That is not a thing.
- It is a thing.
Okay, did you make out?
- [sighs]
- Did you make out?
You may ask me some questions
that I will say yes or no to.
Okay. Boobs in mouth?
Wow. Um, yes.
Did you go down on her?
- No.
- Did she go down on you?
- Yes.
- Um, did you finger-bang her?
- Oh, my God.
- Butt stuff? Any butt stuff?
What? Butt stuff?
Jane, that is hardcore.
You definitely did butt stuff.
- No.
- Yeah!
Oh, my God. We don't
need to talk about it.
[groans] I just can't
believe I missed all of this.
I'm... I'm...
I'm really sorry, Lucy.
- You don't have to apologize.
- Yes, I do.
And I really am.
I was just... I
don't know, I was...
I was frustrated.
You were so stuck, I
was just trying to help.
Yeah, I know.
I don't know why
I've always been
so set on solving your problems.
Hmm. Hmm.
- [laughs]
- May I venture a guess?
Have at it.
I think that perhaps,
I don't know,
maybe it's easier to focus
on someone else's problems
than face your own,
and perhaps there's
some control issues
from being forced to move
here when you were a teenager.
No, that's not it.
Oh, yeah, that's not it?
[both chuckle]
I took you for granted.
I don't know why it took
swinging in a dirty hammock
for me to realize that I
really fucking need you.
Oh, I hate this!
I feel like I've skipped a
whole season of your life.
What am I gonna miss
when I'm on the other
side of the world?
Probably butt stuff.
Okay, can we figure
out when you'll visit?
Yeah, I'll come when
you get settled.
In two weeks?
Jane, you're gonna be okay.
You're gonna love being there.
It's your home.
I mean, you speak the
language. That's good.
You make super-annoying
friends, like, really easily.
You're gonna find a new
me in, like, a week.
I will never find a new you.
I don't wanna miss
your first girlfriend.
Do you have a ride
to the airport?
Do you want me to take you?
No, you are a terrible driver.
I'm not. I feel that I'm actually
a really good driver. One car...
You have to see what's going
on behind you right now.
[man humming]
- Oh, my God! Wow!
- [giggling]
The whole thing? I've never
thought of doing that.
- But I will now.
- That is great.
[car horn honking repeatedly]
["Tarzan Boy" by
Baltimora playing]
Whoo! London Town!
- You sound like Kat.
- Wow.
That's actually the meanest
thing you've ever said to me.
And you've said some
really fucked-up shit.
[Jane] Oh.
Yeah.
[Lucy] Okay.
- Cheer up, buttercup.
- Oh, please. No.
Oh.
Is it still broken?
I thought you got that fixed.
[Lucy] Yeah, well, you just
have to open it from the inside.
It's not broken.
That sounds really safe.
Okay!
Here we go.
- Oh!
- Oh, Jesus! Shall we swap?
That's it.
[both laugh]
Okay.
- [Lucy] Whoo! [laughs]
- [Jane] Jesus!
[song continues playing
over car speakers]
Why are you smiling?
Um... What? Because
I'm happy for you.
This is really exciting.
- Are you okay?
- Yeah, I'm great.
I'm also... You know,
I'm happy for me, too.
Because I won't be here
to boss you around?
No, because I'm coming with you.
- What?
- I'm coming.
I'm gonna come on this
plane to London Town.
What are you talking about?
I know that you really like
to tell me what I need,
but I know what you need also.
And that is me, so I'm coming
for emotional support and
overall encouragement.
- Are you serious?
- Well, yes!
You had shaky
voice at the diner.
No, I didn't. It was the wind.
- You were trembling.
- How long are you gonna stay?
Well, I don't know.
Maybe a fortnight. That
means two weeks in England.
- Okay?
- Yeah, I know what a fortnight is.
It's just to get you
settled, you know?
This is crazy!
[chuckles] And I
brought you a muffin.
You can have half when we take
off and half over New York.
[both chuckle]
Oh, my God, oh, my
God, oh, my God!
We're going to London together.
I know. It's great. Hey, no.
I said half when we take
off and half over New York.
You're so bossy.
Yeah, well, that's who
I am now. I'm in charge.
What are you gonna
do with your car?
Oh.
Um, I'm gonna, uh, park it.
[Jane] What about
your passport?
[Lucy] I have it in my bag.
- [Jane] Has it expired?
- [Lucy] They expire?
[Jane] Do you have luggage?
[Lucy] I have a carry-on.
[Jane] You're gonna need
a warmer jacket than that.
[Lucy] No. Okay, that's
enough. No more talking.
["Los Ageless" by
St. Vincent playing]
In Los Ageless The
winter never comes
In Los Ageless The
mothers milk their young
But I can keep running
No, I can keep running
The Los Ageless
Hang out by the bar
Burn the pages Of
unwritten memoirs
But I can keep running
No, I can keep running
How can anybody have you?
How can anybody have
you And lose you?
How can anybody have
you And lose you
And not lose
Their minds, too?
How can anybody have you?
How can anybody have
you And lose you?
How can anybody have
you And lose you
And not lose
Their minds, too?
Oh
The last days Of the
sunset superstars
Girls in cages
Playing their guitars
But how can I leave?
I just follow the
hood Of my car
In Los Ageless The
waves, they never break
They build and build until
You don't have no escape
But how can I leave?
I just follow my
hood To the sea
Go to sleep
How can anybody have you?
How can anybody have
you And lose you?
How can anybody have
you And lose you
And not lose
Their minds, too?
Oh
Oh my Lord Oh, we
really did it now
I'm a monster And
you're my sacred cow
But I can keep running
No, I can keep on running
Oh, oh
Oh, oh, oh
How can anybody have you?
How can anybody have
you And lose you?
How can anybody have
you And lose you
And not lose
Their minds, too?
How can anybody have you?
How can anybody have
you And lose you?
How can anybody have
you And lose you
And not lose their minds?
Oh
[slow music playing]
Sleater-Kinney playing]
Everyone I know is tired
And everyone I
know Is wired
To machines, it's obscene
I'll just scream 'Til
it don't hurt no more
Ooh, ooh, ooh
Everyone I know is happy
But everyone I
know Is napping
Half the day thrown away
But I can't find
The thrill anymore
Ooh, ooh, ooh
Maybe I'm not sure
I wanna go on
Maybe I'm not sure
I wanna go on at all
[indistinct chatter]
You're gonna get a veggie burger
with sweet potato fries.
You don't know
what I'm gonna get.
Okay.
[waiter] You girls all set?
Yeah. Can I get the
Chinese chicken salad
- and a hot green tea, please?
- [waiter] Mmm-hmm.
And for you?
Um, can I please have...
[whispering] the
veggie burger?
I think... I can't hear you.
[whispers] Veggie burger with
sweet potato fries, please.
[waiter whispers] Okay.
- Oh, and can I also have an...
- [girls] ...iced coffee?
- Just black. Thank you.
- Black. Thank you.
You don't know me.
I do know you.
What are you doing tonight?
Um, I'm going to
have dinner with Ben.
- Lucy!
- Jane!
You have to put him
out of his misery
and eff him already.
You need to do that.
[laughing] What? I
absolutely do not!
What's the problem? He's
great, you like him.
You get to tell
your kids you met
when his toilet overflowed
into your kitchen.
- Lucy, he's in love with you.
- Hey. Hey, baby.
Hi, babe. We just ordered.
I was starving. Hello.
Oh, yeah? Well, thank you for
waiting that extra 30 seconds
I told you it would
take me to park.
Lucy's having dinner
with Ben tonight.
[laughing incredulously]
What? Is tonight the night?
Are we... [blows]
ready? [chuckles]
Why did you blow on it?
Because it's dusty, silly pants.
We're friends, you guys.
He's going to help me
install this new shelf.
[laughs] This poor bastard.
- Let me tell you something.
- What?
Before this lovely woman and
I made love to each other...
Ew, no. Don't
say it like that.
- I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
- Yeah.
Before we made love
in each other...
- [Lucy laughs]
- [Jane chuckles]
we were great friends,
and I would've installed
anything for her.
I would've built her a house.
A very small,
conveniently-sized house.
You wanna know why?
Because I knew that was
going to lead to sex.
I followed her
around like an idiot.
I got a pedicure once.
Desperately needed, but he did.
You guys, no. We're
seriously just friends.
We shake hands after
we have dinner.
[Lucy and man] Ew!
- You guys shake hands?
- Yeah.
- Why would you do...
- [softly] For God's sake.
Like... Like, he's
your accountant?
- No, it's funny.
- It's not funny.
No, I didn't laugh. I
didn't laugh one time.
[Jane] I'm telling you
this because I care.
You need to fuck
or get off the pot.
- I don't think that's how...
- Just do it.
- [man] Do it.
- [Jane] Do it.
- Do it.
- Do it!
- Do it!
- [squeals] Do it!
- [Lucy] We did it!
- [Ben] Yay.
How many paintings do
you think it can hold?
[tapping on wood]
It's sturdy.
I don't know if I'd
put anything on it.
I've never used a drill before.
- [footsteps receding]
- [bottles clinking]
["Easy to Love" by Ivan &
Alyosha playing over speakers]
Thanks.
For all your hard work.
- [chuckles]
- What is this?
It's a Stella.
It might be expired,
though, I...
Uh, I don't really
drink a lot of beer,
but it tastes like
beer. Mmm-hmm.
That's not what I meant.
- What did you mean?
- Oh.
Oh! [chuckles]
- Sorry.
- [chuckles]
- I'm gonna go.
- [sighs] No, Ben.
Why?
Because you just
catapulted off the bed
when I got close to you.
I was caught off guard.
Caught off guard is when
somebody tosses a ball at you
and you flinch, but
you still catch it.
You just slithered away
like Mr. Bean or something.
I thought we were
just staying friends.
But you're playing
all these love songs,
like, really romantic ones.
[Lucy] It's a playlist.
It's called, "All
The Feelz," with a z.
I can see how that
would be misleading.
I just liked it
because of the sadness.
I'll see you later, Lucy.
[door opens and closes]
I forget, you do like it
when I say "I told you so,"
- or you don't like that.
- [sighs deeply]
Everything was okay
until you put it out
into the universe.
Why don't you just
sleep with him?
- Because I don't want to.
- Oh, why not?
I just don't.
Hmm. May I venture a guess?
- No.
- I think
it's because you're afraid
of getting close to someone
for fear of rejection.
Or it could be a
fear of intimacy
stemming from your youth,
your parents' bad marriage
or something that happened
you can't even remember.
No.
Hi. Have you two been
in my class with before?
- [Jane] We haven't.
- [gasps] Great.
I love virgins.
Wow. Oh, my God.
You two were definitely
sisters in a past life.
But one of you
betrayed the other
and burned her at the
stake for being a witch.
That feels like a
her thing to do.
Anyways, if you need anything
during the class,
just let me know.
I do really bomb adjustments.
- "Bomb adjustments."
- Thank you all for letting me
be a part of your
practice today.
Yoga is a great way to calm
our minds and our bodies
and to become one with
ourselves and each other.
So, today's class is gonna be
a rap battle between
Fetty Wap and Lil Yachty.
- [instructor claps]
- [siren wails]
[rap song plays]
[scattered laughter]
[low indistinct chatter]
Do you really think
we were sisters?
[chuckles] I don't think
someone named Sky Jade
- would make that up.
- [chuckles]
I hope I was the cool sister.
I hope I was called Denise.
[laughing] What?
Denise?
Yeah. I've always
wanted to be Denise.
[laughing] That's so lezz.
What? Was Nonce taken?
No, but Nance was.
- Nonce was available.
- [both laughing]
Nobody's named Nonce.
[both continue laughing]
Don't you wanna have
a different name?
Yeah!
But I want it to
be something fun,
like Frederica, Taraji.
- [both laughing]
- You're Denise!
I can't wait to only call
you Denise from now on.
Can you please
drop me off at work
so I don't have
to go home first?
You got it.
[Jane] Going to the bathroom.
[Lucy sighs]
[whistling]
I stole some tampons.
- These are good ones.
- [chuckles]
Call me later, and take a shower
because that is a
tough smell right now.
[chuckles]
Good morning, Luce.
- Hi.
- Hi, my love.
You're here early.
Yeah, I was gonna
meditate with a view,
but then I started making
a mood board on Pinterest
so... [chuckles]
Hi. I'm Jane.
Hi, I'm Brittany.
Nice to meet you.
Jane is my best friend.
Brittany's a new masseuse here.
Oh, cool.
- I love your best friend.
- [Lucy chuckles]
She's a real doozy, isn't she?
[Brittany chuckles]
I'll see you later. It
was nice to meet you.
You, too.
Bye, Luce.
Or Denise. Or
whatever your name is.
[indistinct chatter]
[message tone]
[Jane chuckles]
Oh, my God.
Jane, you have a second?
Yeah, of course.
Let me just finish
this work-related text.
I want to talk to
you about something,
and I want you to
listen closely.
I've been going
through your emails
and all of your
electronic communication.
Listen...
We just googled those penises.
No one has that condition.
Ah.
I'm totally kidding.
I honestly don't care
what you email about.
- [laughs]
- [sighs]
Jane, you're from London, right?
Like, I'm sharp enough
to pick up on this twang.
Yes. I mean, I
haven't lived there
since I was, like,
16. But, yes.
Um, how would you feel about
opening up an office there?
Seriously?
Yeah, there's a
chocolate company
that wants to give Cadbury
a real run for its Bunny.
- [laughing]
- [Jane chuckles awkwardly]
Isn't that clever?
I thought of it as
I was saying it.
They want our help
with the campaign,
and I know you'd
be perfect for it.
Honestly, I think you're ready
to have a whole
division to yourself.
That's an amazing offer.
I... [chuckles]
I don't know what to say.
Well, I do. You can say yes.
[exhales deeply]
At least think
about it, all right?
We'll make it worth your while.
- Okay. Thank you so much.
- Yeah.
Yeah, sure, sure.
Get out of here.
Yeah.
Actually, you can leave it open.
Actually, shut it.
Not all the way.
- That's good right there.
- Yep.
Little more.
Perfect.
Did you get my text?
[Jane] Yes. You are
such a strange person.
- [chuckles]
- Can we get drinks later?
Um, yeah. Are you okay?
Yeah, it's just dumb work stuff.
Okay, it's not cancer?
What? No. Goodbye.
- Hey.
- Ooh.
- [cell phone clatters]
- Whoa.
- Sorry. Let me get that.
- Sorry.
[grunts]
- Hmm.
- [phone thuds]
Whoa, that's incredible.
Oh, I just like to doodle.
[laughs] It's better
than a doodle.
I love that you can do that.
- Meg?
- [Meg] Yes?
- Are you ready to head back?
- [Meg] I'm ready.
- [indistinct chatter]
- [upbeat music playing]
Sorry, I was
googling butt herpes.
- Hello, Lucy.
- I got you a tequils.
Oh, God bless you.
Mmm.
Mmm.
What a delicious beverage.
You may now tell me
what happened today.
Wait, before you
guys get into that,
I'm gonna go take a leak
while you two sync your periods.
Mmm! Nailed it. [chuckling]
- Dumb.
- Stupid.
- [Danny] Ah.
- Really stupid.
So, um...
I got called into
Stu's office today.
[chuckling] Did you get fired?
No, I kind of got a promotion.
Jane that is so awesome.
They want to transfer
me to London.
Wait, what?
He wants me to
start up an office
in London.
What did you say?
I said yes.
Wow, that's great.
- Thanks.
- Mmm-hmm.
Crazy, right?
When... When? When
does this happen?
Well, not for, like, six months.
So, it's not like
tomorrow or anything.
Awesome. That's so awesome!
This is so awesome.
Wow. Awesome.
You really deserve this.
I just feel like,
"Why not?" You know?
Like, I've never
been an adult there.
I might like it. I can
take the tube to work.
I've never taken
the tube to work.
[Lucy] Yeah.
What about Danny?
Oh, he's in.
I mean, what else
is he going to do?
He said he could find
some nerdy music blog
to write for over there.
I mean, maybe London
will inspire him
to fucking propose.
You think you're gonna get
engaged while you're there?
Well, I mean... [sighs]
No...
He'll probably wait
another eight years.
[Lucy] Mmm-hmm.
What?
I know it kinda sucks.
I'm so happy for you.
But...
Well... it's gonna
be weird, isn't it?
Not living five minutes
away from each other.
Yeah, but I mean, it's...
- That's... I'm busy, you know?
- Mmm-hmm.
There's, like, all of the
stuff that's going real well,
and all the other
really important things,
and the kids are almost
in college, so...
Uh, how many kids
do you have again?
I have 12 kids.
What are their names again?
They're all named Denise.
- That's right.
- [both chuckle]
Well, honestly, Lucy,
this might be
really good for you.
Start painting again.
Sell some shit.
I won't be here to distract you.
Yeah, totally.
Everything... Jane.
Everything is gonna
be fine, okay?
You're gonna be
fine. I'm fine.
[sobbing]
You promise you're gonna
come back all the time?
[Jane] Yes, of course.
[Lucy continues sobbing]
But do you know when?
Like, what dates?
I don't know exactly, but often.
Cool.
[sniffles]
Do you wipe front to back?
Yeah, you have to
wipe front to back.
Yeah, but some people
wipe all the way
in one motion from
front to back.
No, I do two in the front
and one in the back.
- Yeah.
- Tap-tap one. One tap two.
Yeah, that's what I do.
[sobbing] That's why...
that's why we're
best friends, Jane!
That's why, because...
[continues sobbing]
[Jane] Lucy...
Because we even
wipe the same way!
And now we won't even
be wiping in the same...
[flushing]
- country!
- Okay.
- Let... let's wash our hands.
- [sobbing]
[Lucy sniffles] I love you.
[Jane] Okay, I
have a confession.
Sometimes I blow
my nose in my shirt
when I'm working out.
Oh, okay, well, some
of those are my shirts!
I have a little
confession to make.
- Okay.
- [both laugh]
Sometimes I go
pee in the shower.
Everyone pees in the shower!
- Talk about...
- That's not a good one.
- I have a confession.
- Oh, really?
I kissed Amanda
Newman in tenth grade.
- Okay!
- Yeah.
[Danny] Thousand points
for that confession.
- [Jane] Uh-huh.
- [Danny] Wow.
Wait, what? You
never told me that.
Yeah. Tenth grade,
behind 7-Eleven.
She dared me to do
it and I did it.
How could you not tell me that?
That's a big girl if
you kissed a deal.
- [Danny] Mmm?
- [laughing] What?
I mean, it's a big kiss
if you dealt a girl.
I mean...
- The third way to say that.
- [Jane and Danny laugh]
Why don't you take a little sip
of that water right there, honey?
There you go. Good job.
- [Danny and Jane laugh]
- Yo, was she a good kisser?
- She was pretty good.
- Mmm-hmm?
[Jane] Yeah. She was.
[slurring] You never even said
this to me before, these words.
I never heard them.
Have you ever kissed
a girl before?
No.
Well, if you were
to kiss a girl...
- [Danny] Mmm-hmm.
- Who would it be?
- Who would you kiss?
- Brittany.
Brittany? That's interesting.
- Why is it... Who is...
- Yeah. Yeah.
Who is... Who's Brit-Brit?
She's who does the
massages at my job.
- Is she, uh, gay or straight?
- She's just... I don't know.
Maybe she's straight.
She wears dresses.
Oh, you... Okay. You know
lesbians wear dresses, right?
She said she loved you today.
She is very, very flirty.
She likes to touch me.
Do you know what
she calls her? Luce.
- [Danny] Mmm.
- [Jane] And she's just started working there.
You should do it.
It is not a good idea to make out
with your coworkers, you guys.
Read the news.
Right. I'm going to bed.
You always do that so abruptly.
I know when it's time.
Can we have a sleepover?
I don't... Mmm...
[Jane] You better
come and visit me.
Yeah, I'll bring
you that sandwich
that you really love from
that shitty place on Sunset.
[sighs contentedly] Thank you.
I'll put it in a cooler.
It'll stay good on the
plane for 11 hours, right?
For sure.
[sniffles]
[Lucy sobbing softly]
Are you crying?
- [voice breaking] No.
- Lucy...
I promise it's not
gonna be that different.
[continues sobbing softly]
- [sniffles]
- Don't cry.
We can FaceTime and
talk just like always.
[continues sobbing]
Whoa. What's going on?
Lucy...
[sighs]
You know, when I said that I
would make out with Brittany...
Yes?
I really would.
I didn't think you
were lying about that.
But, like... [sobs]
I really would.
[Lucy sobs]
Like... Like, really?
Yeah, I think so.
Oh, my God. Why didn't
you say anything?
I just felt easier to
keep it buried inside.
Fuck, Lucy. You can't
keep this inside.
- You'll explode.
- [sighs]
I hate this.
[sighs deeply]
Have you talked to
anyone about this?
How long have you felt this way?
A while.
And you never acted on it?
Like, not even in secret?
[Lucy] Oh!
I feel so stupid.
Like... [sighs] I should
have figured this out by now.
You can't look at it that way.
Yes, I can, Jane.
I'm 32 years old.
There's no timeline
to figuring it out.
People figure this out
when they're, like, nine.
Nine?
When I was nine, I
pretended I was a puppy
and I would only bark at people.
Yeah, that sounds strange
to say it out loud.
I feel so stupid.
[sobbing] And I don't
even know what I am.
I don't even know if I'm...
if I'm really that way,
and I'm just afraid to admit it,
or if I'm not, and
I just... What?
I don't ever, like, date boys.
I mean, men. I don't know.
Well, maybe you're both.
[sighs]
No. I just should've
figured it out.
When you kissed Amanda
Newman, did you like it?
Oh, God, I guess. I had a
Zima. I thought I was drunk.
But you weren't like,
"Maybe I'm gay?"
I don't know. I
wasn't gonna, like,
be with Amanda Newman.
- Why? Why not?
- 'Cause...
Well, it was just a dumb kiss.
So, when you kiss Danny,
are you thinking, like,
"I'm so straight.
I love dudes?"
Usually, I'm like, "Brush your
teeth. I can taste Subway."
Seriously.
I don't know if it's
so simple, Lucy.
How have you felt
sleeping with guys?
Weird.
Weird like you think
everything is weird
or weird like you
just didn't like it?
Weird like that must be the
reason I've barely done it.
Did you think that I was?
A vagina lover?
- [tuts and scoffs]
- It crossed my mind.
I'm not. I don't... I...
I don't love
vaginas. I'm not...
You did own a Volvo
in high school.
- You did.
- Jane, Volvos are
- the safest car.
- Okay.
[scoffs]
Shit, Lucy, I'm sorry. I'm...
I'm mad I never brought it up
if it was hurting you this much.
It's okay.
I probably would have
just lied anyway.
Well, now we know.
And now, we've got to get you
to make out with Brit-Brit.
I don't even know
if she likes girls.
Well, then we'll find
you some girls who do.
Lucy, from what I understand,
and I believe this to be true,
all lesbians know each other.
They've all slept
with each other.
So, for you to
enter into the fray,
you're gonna be the star
of the lesbian community.
I don't like that word.
I know. "Community."
[both chuckle]
I'm scared.
Of course it's scary.
But you think a lot
of things are scary.
You still scared of how
Salt-N-Pepa whisper in Push It?
[chuckles] Yes. Very.
Look, I'd be scared to
touch someone else's vagina.
[chuckles]
But I'm not leaving this
country till you do.
[inhales sharply]
- I love you.
- I love you.
[groans softly]
Luce, you okay? What's wrong?
Oh, yeah, I just had
too much tequila.
Oh, give me your hand.
Give me your hand.
I know a cure for a
hangover headache.
Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow.
What'd you do last night?
- Did you have a hot date?
- Mmm, no.
Uh, Jane told me she's
moving to London,
so I got shit-faced.
Oh, Luce, I'm sorry,
but, um, I mean,
that... that...
Well, it sucks.
It's fine. It's okay. Um...
Probably not
helping my headache.
- Is that too much?
- No, it's so nice.
Well, we can hang out more.
Unless you...
- Oh, no.
- Don't want to.
[laughs] No, no. I'd love to.
[laughs] Okay, good.
Because I'm a lot of fun.
More later?
[softly] No.
[sighs]
[scoffs]
[sighs]
[laughing]
Have you ever fucked
an Uber driver?
- No.
- That's so something
- Drew would do.
- [Jane laughs]
You know Drew.
Which one's Drew?
I've talked about him.
He's the one who only
talks on speakerphone.
He's the fucking worst.
- I'd still fuck him, though.
- [Jane and Kat laugh]
Maybe I should try to do that
- before we leave for London.
- Mmm.
Oh, you're gonna
go to London, too?
- Yeah, I told you that.
- Mmm-mmm. No, you didn't.
I can't wait to go
and be on Jane's team!
I'm so excited! Girls.
[in accented English]
Say Vegemite! "Vegemite."
That's Australian.
Love It. Storying
it. Posting it.
I'm fully going bi
when I go to London.
The girls are so
fucking hot there.
Wait. Are you,
uh, seeing anyone?
Uh, no, not right now.
Did you guys know I've only
been with seven people?
- [Jane] Really?
- Isn't that crazy?
My number's nine, including
Danny. And I feel like...
Danny needs to let
you get to ten.
- Right?
- He needs to.
How many people
have you slept with?
Um...
- Um...
- [Kat] Too many to count?
- No, no, no. I...
- I wish I was like you,
but we have the same
hair, so I'm on my way.
[laughs awkwardly]
[Kat] I love this shirt!
- Oh, really?
- Mmm-hmm.
- Thanks.
- Where'd you get it?
It's probably from the
Gap. Is it from the Gap?
Aw, the Gap.
Um, actually, I think it is.
Aw, the Gap.
[chuckles]
- J? J?
- Hmm?
You have something
in your teeth.
- Oh. Thank you.
- [Kat] Perfect. You got it.
I always tell people when they
have something in their teeth.
I think it's like the
most important thing
- you can do for a friend.
- I totally agree.
I think it's so important.
I mean, it's not like the most
important thing you can do.
I, like... I didn't see it.
I would have said
something if I saw it, J.
Will you come visit us?
Will you come to London?
Will you come?
Well, yeah, I hope
so. We'll see.
Wait, guys. I have a
friend from college
who knows a bunch of the royals.
We should follow
them on Instagram.
Jane hates Instagram.
I don't hate it. I just
don't go on it a ton.
Well, I hope you like big,
random dinner parties.
- Yeah, I love!
- What?
You absolutely hate
dinner parties.
This is different. When
you're abroad, it's different.
When you're abroad,
everything's different.
Everything is different
when you're abroad.
I can't wait to
meet Jane's family!
- [Jane] Isn't Kat the best?
- [Lucy] She's the best.
[Jane] You hate her.
I don't hate her,
but she's just a lot.
Yeah, but I like it.
You gals are gonna have
fun in London, aren't you?
Oh, I almost forgot.
I got muffins.
Ooh!
- Bluebs?
- A bluebs and a bran.
We each have half of one now
and half when we're done.
I can't have a whole one now?
No, half and half.
And then we have a snack
waiting for us when we're done.
It's the smart way to do it.
It's the controlling
way to do it.
I'm the thoughtful one
who bought muffins.
[sighs] Which one do you want?
Bran or bluebs?
Bran, obviously.
End with the bluebs.
I guess I'll have bran.
[Jane] We need to
figure out your type.
[Lucy] No, no.
Why does she touch me so much?
- You mean Brit-Brit?
- Yeah.
'Cause she wants to
have sex with you.
[Lucy] It's like way
more than normal.
Look, here's the bottom line.
You can use this chick
- as a sexual portal.
- Why?
But this isn't a
lasting relationship.
Touch her stuff, roll around.
Then we've got to
get you on those apps
so people know their
way around your area.
I do not want to do that.
Can I ask you something?
Why don't you think you have
to date like everyone else?
No one's gonna ring on
your doorbell one day,
looking for a
wishy-washy lesbian
who might want to
try some stuff.
- You don't know that for sure.
- [panting]
Come on, two at a time.
Squeeze your cheeks.
- [continues panting]
- This is different.
How is it different?
Because, what if somebody
I know is on there
and then they're like,
"What? She's gay?"
- Then what?
- Then everybody knows.
Great!
It's not like people know you
as this tried and
true heterosexual.
You never let anyone set
you up, you don't date.
People will be like,
"Oh, good. She
figured it out."
Do you think people
are thinking that?
I don't know! [laughs]
Everyone is just gonna
want you to be happy.
What if I'm not
meant to be happy?
Oh, my God.
I'm running up there, and
I am not coming back down.
Fine.
- I'm sitting here.
- [groans]
Have I ever been happy?
I don't even know
what makes me happy.
I'm nervous all the time.
And I'm scared of everything.
Lucy, these are
lame fucking excuses
so you don't have to step
outside of your comfort zone.
You're more than
capable of being happy.
Don't spew that bullshit at me.
I'm being vulnerable right
now and you're attacking me.
Squeeze. You're not even
comfortable in your comfort zone.
So, why not just
try something new?
You try 20 different
flavors of ice cream
before you settle on a
single scoop. Do that.
Ice cream is different
than a vagina.
How do you know?
You don't know.
Yeah, I do know.
Otherwise, it would be called
vagice cream. [laughing]
Am I okay?
I don't want to be this
thing that's different.
I don't want to have to tell
everybody this big thing. It's...
I know that it's fine, and
no one cares, but I care,
and I'm late.
It's so late in life.
Then don't waste any more time.
I just wish I didn't
think about her so much.
You think about her a lot?
Lucy, you're gonna be fine.
Let's go to a gay bar one
night and have a look around.
I'm sure there's a place with
some kind of lesbian jamboree.
The Womb.
You know it's called the Womb.
I've never been more
proud of you. We're going.
[chuckles] No. I'm
not ready for that.
Please, it'll be
fun. It's research.
Can I please have the other
half of my muffin now?
And do you want to mention
how much better it is
to end with bluebs?
- [sighs]
- Don't ignore me, Denise!
You gotta start shaving
above da knees, Denise.
[sighs]
[keyboard clacking]
- Hey, pretty. Whatcha doing?
- [gasps] Oh, um, just...
I was just googling things.
- Totally random.
- [sighs]
Just totally random stuff.
Oh, Luce, you are so talented.
- What?
- [chuckles]
Like, what are you
even doing here?
[chuckles]
Good question.
Actually, I paint.
That's what I like to do.
Well, I want to
see your paintings.
Oh... [chuckles]
No. I mean, I don't
have any of them here.
I didn't think you
had them with you.
- [both chuckle]
- Can you imagine?
I just pull out, like,
12 from under the table.
[both laugh]
I wanna see your paintings
because I bet they're amazing.
Yeah, maybe one day.
Well, when are we
gonna hang out?
Um...
whenever.
Okay. Tonight?
Sure, I can do tonight.
I can make that work.
Okay, well, I'll cook.
- Squee! I'm so excited.
- [both chuckle]
[breathes deeply]
[softly] Bitch.
[phone thuds]
Oh, my God. All the time.
[music playing over speakers]
- Really?
- Yes.
Like, boner after boner
after sad little boner.
Wow.
Do they ever ask you to, like...
diddle them? [chuckles]
- Some.
- [chuckles]
I've diddled.
I diddled. One time.
- You did?
- [laughing] Yes.
I mean, I had to try
it at some point.
And he was cute.
So, it was fine.
Wow. Did he tip you?
Oh, fuck, yeah.
But that was it.
That was all I did.
That's why I'm
saying. Like, really,
I wanna open a
female-only studio.
They're just...
They're better.
I bet not so many hairy backs.
- [laughs] You'd be surprised.
- [chuckles]
No, they're, um...
They're much softer.
- [Lucy and Brittany laughing]
- [Brittany] Oh, my God!
What's your longest
relationship?
I don't know. Not long.
Like, months. A
couple of months.
Have you ever been in love?
Mmm!
- Really?
- No.
Oh, I'm kinda jealous. Like,
you have something great
to look forward to.
- Have you?
- Oh, yeah.
My college boyfriend.
I was obsessed with him,
and I thought that, like,
if he broke up with
me, I would die.
Like, literally die.
What happened?
He moved to Portland,
then he broke up with me.
And then I didn't die, so...
- Cheers to that.
- [chuckles]
And then I realized
that I should probably
have sex with more people.
So...
[Lucy] Mmm-hmm. Mmm-hmm.
Do you miss him?
Mmm... No.
I mean, I see him sometimes.
I feel like he's a weirdo.
And I think that he's gay, so...
Really?
I don't know.
It's a spectrum, right?
Gay, straight, bi. What
does it even all mean?
I think in that case,
it means you're either
gay, straight or bi.
[laughing] You're funny.
- [laughing]
- You're funny.
I mean, I think everyone falls
somewhere on the spectrum.
Like, I know I'm
on the spectrum.
You're on the spectrum,
don't you think?
- Probably.
- Hmm. Love is love.
[clicks tongue]
Have you ever made
out with a girl?
You haven't?
- No.
- What?
Why do you say that?
No, I just, like... I assumed.
Because you're a
woman with the times.
- What?
- [both laughing]
What does that mean?
I don't know. I
just feel like...
everyone should try
it at some point.
Have you?
No.
Not yet.
Show me one of your paintings.
Um...
And then I'll leave
after. I promise.
You don't have to go.
Uh, I mean, you don't
have to do that.
Okay.
- Just one.
- Fine.
[Lucy sighs]
- There's...
- Ooh.
This is so cool. [chuckles]
I love that you paint.
Oh, my God.
- Lucy.
- [chuckles nervously]
They're old.
They're really old.
I haven't painted
in a long time.
This is what you
should be doing.
- I don't know.
- [chuckles]
[inhales deeply]
I should go.
This was fun.
- [Lucy] Yeah. Yeah.
- Right? [laughs]
Um, we should do it more.
- [Lucy] Totally. Yeah.
- Yeah.
Good night.
Night-night.
"Night-night?" What?
[Sky] When you let go and start
to embrace who you really are,
that's when you start to open up
your hearts and your bodies.
- [sobbing softly]
- Today, I want you to remember
to lead with hope
and not with fear.
Fear only holds you back.
I don't know. I didn't
ask her to stay.
Maybe I should have.
[Jane] I don't like this.
You have shaky voice.
No, I don't.
- Yes, you do.
- God, it's just weird.
It's all... weird. [sighs]
I'm weird. I hate this.
How close was the kiss?
Like, close.
Show me where?
Like, here.
That's pretty close.
I don't know about this bitch.
If she's fucking with you,
I'll fuck her shit up.
Do you think she's gay?
I have no idea.
But, like, if you
had to guess...
I mean, I've never kissed
a platonic girlfriend
on a mouth corner.
[Lucy sighs]
She said women have soft backs.
Ew. Jesus. What? And
you drank white wine?
Lucy, I'm genuinely alarmed.
Maybe she's more
confused than I am.
Maybe.
But you need someone who knows.
Two people trying to figure out
if they're lesbians together,
that might be the worst
idea I've ever heard.
That's why we're
going to the Womb.
- No.
- Yes.
- I don't want to.
- We're finding you
- a girlfriend before I leave.
- Please.
["Heart to Break" by
Kim Petras playing]
[loud chatter]
Heart to break...
I'd make a great lesbian.
That's the real
shame in all of this.
How are you doing?
Good. Great.
This girl's cute. She's
cute. She's cute, she's cute.
Hi.
I'm Jane. This is Lucy.
Hi.
Do you wanna come dance with me?
Um, I... [hesitating]
I don't... I, uh...
I, um... I have a
drink. I'm drinking it.
- So, um...
- Okay.
- Go with her.
- What?
Why did you do that to me?
Oh, my God! Because
you never do anything.
Come on, let's have some fun.
Even if it means
That I'll never
Put myself back together
Gonna give you
My heart to break
Even if I'll end
up in shatters
Baby, it doesn't matter
Gonna give you
My heart to break
I tried to fight
But I can't help it
Don't care if this
is My worst mistake
'Cause no one else
Could do it better
And that's why I give
you My heart to break
[sobbing]
[cell phone chimes]
[sighing]
[man] Right, so, I thought
we'd have a quick debrief...
[softly] He sounds
so fucking hot.
- [Jane chuckles]
- Jeremy from accounts.
Uh, there were a few...
[chimes]
- And there are...
- [Kat] Yeah.
Some responsibilities
that I'm gonna run
up the flagpole
and see if they will
fall in your lap.
Yeah, we can have
that by tomorrow.
They want us to focus on it.
So, I'm just giving you
a heads-up for that.
[Kat] Uh-huh!
- [Kat laughs] - [man continues
speaking indistinctly]
[sighs]
[man] ...we can
tie up together.
I don't think they need to
be as dispersed as they are.
But that's just
the best practice.
- Uh-huh.
- You know?
Whatcha doin'?
Oh, nothing. I'm just...
Dumb online
shopping. [chuckles]
That one's kinda cute.
Oh, I'm not really a...
hole in the shoulders
kind of girl.
[chuckles] Well, you only need
one good shoulder
for that shirt.
- And you have two.
- Oh?
- Mmm-hmm.
- Thanks.
I just had the best idea.
- Does it involve my shoulders?
- Yeah, it does.
We should have a try-on party.
What's a try-on party?
Like, try-on-my-clothes party.
I love fashion.
I should've been a stylist.
Whatever. That's not even
what we're talking about.
We'll have some wine.
You try on my clothes
that I never wear
and if you like them,
you can keep them.
- Did you just make that up?
- Mmm-mmm.
Everybody has try-on parties.
Really? I... I don't
think that's true.
It is true!
Doesn't it sound fun, though?
Do you have a lot of pants?
Lucy, this is like a...
No. It's like you need
more colors and pattern.
Introduce new
things to your life.
[Kat] And you CC'd me on that?
- Yeah.
- Okay.
Hi. They didn't
have any, um...
[gasps] Hi!
- Oh, it's so good to see you!
- [Lucy] Hi.
I love this jacket.
Thanks. Thank you.
I love your dress?
- I designed it.
- No way.
- Yeah.
- That's so nice.
- How are you?
- I'm good.
- How are you?
- I'm so good.
I'm so excited for my girl.
Get your food and eat with us.
Oh, no, no. You guys go do
your cute little
thing. [chuckles]
I can't believe you just
asked her to eat with us.
Oh, stop. I knew she wouldn't.
Well, I'm sure she'd love to be
in the middle of our
little "cute little thing."
I have so much shit
to get through.
They just asked if I
could leave earlier.
- I'm not going to.
- Good.
Can they send
Kat? Like, today?
I'll go pack her things.
All right. Enough
with that already.
All right, well, maybe
I'm just a little bit sad
that my best friend is
moving across the world.
Well, maybe you could
be happy for me.
That's what best friends
are supposed to do.
- I am happy for you.
- Then act like it.
Are you serious right now?
When am I not happy for you?
Ooh. Ooh.
I'm not doing this now.
Oh, you're not doing this now?
When would be better
for you to do this?
Since everything is
always on your schedule.
I'm at work.
I don't know what
happens at a spa,
but we're professionals here.
Oh, nice. You got a dig in.
Any other judgments
you want to share?
- Oh, please.
- What?
You want to boss me
around a little bit more?
- Boss...
- Tell me how to live my life?
Boss you around?
You're free to do whatever
the fuck you want.
Oh, well...
I know you take that to heart.
What's that supposed to mean?
You always do whatever
the fuck you want.
You feel like making out
with some girl at a club,
then you make out with
some girl at a club.
She asked if she could
kiss me, so I said yes.
Because it's more
fun to say yes.
If you wanted to, you
could've done the same thing.
Why? So you could tell
me I was doing it wrong?
Oh, my God, Lucy, do
shit however you want.
I am not your keeper.
What? You're always
controlling me.
You control everything I do.
You told me when I could
eat a fucking muffin.
Yeah, because if I didn't
tell you what to do,
you'd probably never
leave the house.
You can't make any
decisions on your own.
You don't do anything.
You can't even decide what
gender of the human race
- you want to fuck.
- Fuck you.
You probably do want to fuck me.
- What?
- Everyone thinks that.
- [shushing]
- What are you talking about?
We're not a couple, Lucy.
Nobody thinks we're a
couple. What? Are you insane?
People think we're,
like, confusing twins.
What... what the fuck
is wrong with you?
What the fuck is wrong with you?
You can't even handle the fact
that I have another friend.
Oh, what a fun friend.
[Jane] You know what? At
least Kat talks about things.
[Lucy] Yeah. It was really
thrilling to find out
that she can suck a
dick and order Postmates
- at the same time.
- That was thrilling.
And it's fun to hear
crazy fucking stories
instead of wallowing in
sorrow the whole time.
At some point you're gonna have
to pull your head
out of your own ass.
You think Kat could
teach me how to do that?
I bet you she's tried.
Real friends tell
each other shit.
I tell you everything.
Except the most important thing.
It's not about you, Jane.
I'm not saying it's about me.
Christ, if anything,
it's all about you.
The only thing you can focus on
is a lunatic who
touches you a lot,
whose job it is to touch
people for a living.
But this is what you do.
Turn everything around
into this self-pity party.
It can be really scary
to try new things.
When's the last time
you ever took a risk?
I'm moving to fucking London.
Yeah. You're moving back
to where you're from
with your boyfriend,
and on a fucking
expense account.
That's not taking a
risk. That's a whim.
It's an opportunity
to advance my career.
Do you ever think about actually
doing something for a living?
You know, it's hard
to be a painter
if you stop fucking painting.
- Fuck you!
- Fuck you!
[Lucy] You know what?
I wouldn't fuck you. If you
were the last person on Earth,
I wouldn't fuck you.
[Jane] I feel sorry for you.
Don't. You don't need to.
You obviously don't
know anything about me.
Well, it's not
because I didn't try.
Have a good trip.
- [Danny] Just call her.
- Oh, God.
When do you think the
last time I wore this was?
When you filmed The Wiz?
I don't feel joy.
How could you? It's very ugly.
This is hers.
- Whose?
- Hers.
Her name is Lucy.
She's your best friend.
What, we can't say
her name anymore?
She probably
doesn't even know...
She has, like, 4,000 of these.
[sighs]
[sighs]
[Danny] So, why don't
you just call her?
Tell her you have it. Make up.
Maybe you won't be sad.
I'm not calling
her. I'm not sad.
I'm done. She's
never happy for me.
So, what, you're just
gonna go to London
and never talk to
your best friend?
Probably.
[sighs]
Oh, I hate this stupid sweater!
Okay. All right, listen, this
is your favorite sweater.
Now I think we're just
misplacing our feelings.
I just wanted her
to move forward.
I know. But it's
not up to you.
Well, it should be.
You were saying she
called you bossy, right?
Aw, come here.
I know. I know, I know, I
know, I know. Come here.
I'm sorry, baby.
Maybe we should go earlier.
Everything is gonna be okay.
It's just a stressful
time right now.
[indistinct chatter]
[waiter] Are we
waiting on your friend?
Mmm-mmm. No, it's just me.
Oh. What can I get you?
Um, I will have a veggie burger.
Mmm-hmm. That it?
Um, and an iced coffee, please.
Mmm. Cream?
Yes, please. Oh,
no, actually...
Just... Just black.
[Lucy clears throat]
[indistinct chatter]
[people laughing]
- [Brittany] Ta-da!
- [laughs]
Try-on party!
- Oh, wow. Time to try me on.
- Ooh.
Or whatever.
- Wow.
- Here.
Put this one on. I'm
gonna go grab wine.
[whispers] Oh, my God.
[wine bottle opening]
I feel like we need music.
[music playing over speakers]
Ooh, and atmosphere.
Um...
Much better.
There we go.
Look at your cute little body.
- [Lucy] Oh, my God.
- [laughs]
Wait. Okay.
I'm gonna help you.
Um...
Is that your... Did you...
Why did you put
it over your head?
- [Lucy] I don't know.
- You could've just, like,
- stepped into it here. Ooh.
- [chuckles]
It's gonna look so good
though, once it's on.
- Oh, sorry!
- [Lucy exhales]
Oh, there's a zipper.
[laughing]
- [laughs awkwardly]
- That's so funny!
- [Lucy] That's so funny.
- Here we go.
Oh, my God. Yes, babe!
- Wow.
- You look so hot.
- What?
- I don't use that word like that.
Luce, you have no
idea how hot you are.
Like, seriously. Turn
around. Look at your ass.
You have to keep that.
I'm a genius. I know.
Where do you even wear
something like this?
Like the clurb.
Where? Is that a restaurant?
The clurb. It's, like, a
funny word for the club.
- Oh, the club? That's right.
- Yes!
- I don't...
- You're keeping that.
This one's next.
Let's take a break.
Let's take a pot break.
- Okay.
- For the anxiety.
You're right.
You know, colors
look good on you.
- [Lucy] Gray's a color.
- [both chuckle]
I can't stop thinking
about your paintings.
[scoffs] Please.
No, seriously. Did you, like,
go to fancy art
school or something?
No. [chuckles]
Why not?
[Lucy] I don't know.
Well, why don't
you be a painter?
I don't know.
Why don't you
really try fashion?
[Brittany] 'Cause it's hard.
And I'm lazy.
And it's just like a hobby.
But it's a tragedy
because I would've been,
like, a major success.
[chuckling]
But you're different.
["Etc Etc" by Roe playing]
I feel like there's
something going on here.
Yeah?
So...
Yeah.
[Lucy] What are you doing?
[Brittany] I'm gonna go pee.
[door opens]
[door closes]
[exhales]
[toilet flushing]
[door opens]
[door closes]
I should, um... I
should probably go.
Really?
[Brittany chuckles]
Yeah, I just have
a lot of errands
to run and stuff,
but thanks for having me over.
That was really fun.
Don't you want to stay
a little while longer?
- [Brittany laughs]
- Just a little.
Yeah, I do. I...
I gotta go.
Well, thanks for...
- everything.
- [both laugh]
Go back to bed.
Boop.
[door opens]
[door closes]
[Kat] I love that she thinks
we were sisters in a past life.
I've always thought
that about us.
[woman] Bye, see you guys...
[Kat] Bye!
- Fucking love that class!
- [Jane] Me, too.
[Kat and Jane continue
conversing indistinctly]
Are you sure? You
don't have to do this.
No, I'm positive.
I actually think it would be
really helpful to
get there sooner.
Great. [chuckles]
And Kat's agreed
to go early also.
Even better! [chuckles]
Anyway, let me know if
you need anything, Jane.
And in the meantime,
I'll make sure
everything is set up
for you across the lake.
Well, thank you again.
No, thank you, Jane.
You're saving me a
crapload of money.
- [chuckles]
- Start packing. Yeah?
[door opens]
Hey.
- Oh, hi.
- How are you feeling?
Good. You?
Great. Except,
whose idea was it
to drink and smoke so much?
- Yours.
- Oh, yeah. Oops.
Wrong folder.
- I'm still high.
- [both chuckle]
[Lucy] What are
you doing tonight?
[Brittany] I can't wait
for this day to be over.
Hmm?
Oh, nothing. I was, um...
[sighs] I need a nap.
[Lucy chuckles]
- Me, too.
- Yeah.
Um... Are things weird?
Between us?
Yeah.
No. Why would they be weird?
I had so much fun.
Like, I always
wanted to try that
and we did. [chuckles]
Maybe we can do it again.
Sure. I mean, yeah. I...
I'm free tonight
if you want to...
I mean, I know it's last minute.
Well, I can't tonight, but soon.
- Cool.
- Cool.
[cell phone chimes]
[sighs shakily]
Happy birthday to you
[chuckles]
Happy birthday To
my lovely and funny
And-sometimes-mad-at-me-
For-no-reason-at-all baby
[both chuckle]
Happy birthday to you
Aw! Thank you, my babe.
You're welcome. I
used to work at IHOP,
- so I know the recipe.
- [both chuckle]
You can share some
of that if you want.
- No, I can't.
- Okay.
- It's your birthday.
- Good to know.
What was I thinking?
What was I thinking?
Hmm. What if she doesn't call?
[laughs] She will!
But what if she doesn't?
Baby, she will.
Come here. Look.
[kissing] You know what?
If she doesn't call,
you always got me.
It's not the same.
- None taken.
- I didn't say, "No offense."
Yet you should have.
You know, we've never not spoken
on our birthdays for
our entire friendship.
I don't even think
we've spent one apart.
Baby...
she is going to call you.
Well, what if she's
sad and she needs me?
[hesitates] Then you both are
gonna talk about all of that
when she calls. Okay?
- Okay. Okay.
- Okay. Right.
Yeah.
- That's for me? Thank you.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- Mmm! Mmm!
- You're a monster.
[door closes]
[Brittany] What's up?
Nothing.
It's Jane's birthday today
and, I don't know, we're
still in a fight, so...
- Aw, that sucks.
- Yeah.
What are you up to tonight?
Mmm, I may have
dinner with a friend.
My dumb ex texted me
saying he was in town,
so he might stop by here.
Cool.
Where is this stuff?
Um, bottom drawer.
[drawer opening]
Thank you. You the best.
[sighs]
[line ringing]
[whispering] Please
don't pick up.
Please don't pick up.
Please don't pick up.
[over recording]
Hey, it's Jane.
Leave a message. Thank you.
Hi, um...
This is me. Uh, it's Lucy.
Um... I'm just calling to say,
uh, happy birthday to you,
and, um, many, many great days.
Uh...
I hope you're doing good.
And I will see you soon.
I mean, talk to you soon.
Happy birthday.
- [sighs]
- [Brittany laughs]
[man] You look great.
- Okay. Look at you.
- I can't believe
- how long it's been.
- You look so good.
[man speaking indistinctly]
- [Brittany] You're hilarious.
- Yeah?
[Lucy] I'm just calling to
say happy birthday to you,
and, um, many, many great days.
Uh, I hope you're doing good.
And I will see you soon.
I mean, talk to you soon.
Happy birthday.
[Lucy] Hi, um, this is me.
Uh, it's Lucy...
[Stu] Jane?
Hey, when you have a second,
can I see you in my office?
- Sure. I'll be right there.
- Okay, thanks.
You guys, she
totally fell for it.
She's coming. She fell
for it. Here she comes.
- Surprise!
- [all] Surprise!
Happy birthday! Make a
wish for London Town.
I told them no cake, so
I'm not tempted to eat any.
- But I love cake.
- [camera clicking]
Sorry. I don't want it.
Can you turn to your left?
- Happy birthday.
- [Jane] Thank you.
I have a little
something for you.
A credit
to the Tate Modern gift shop.
It's been in my wallet
for about five years.
Thank you so much, Mr. Davis.
You deserve it.
Have a safe trip.
Oh, I don't leave for
another three weeks.
- I'm gonna say goodbye now.
- Okay.
- Open it.
- Oh.
You didn't have to
get me anything.
[camera shutter clicking]
Hammock Sanctuary?
- Have you been?
- No.
Oh, my God, you're
gonna love it.
It's a mind-body
new vibes retreat.
And everything's in a hammock.
You eat in a hammock,
you sleep in a hammock,
you live in a hammock.
You could have that privilege.
Oh, my! Uh...
Wh... where is it?
In the middle of the woods,
totally off the grid.
And you're not even supposed
to bring your phone,
but I will for Insta, obviously,
'cause I'm not a
fucking psychopath.
Smile. Say, "Hammock girls."
Hammock gir... I
need to hear it.
[both] Hammock girls.
[Danny] All right,
so, is this a cult?
'Cause it sounds like a cult.
It was a gift. What
was I supposed to say?
You say, "No, thank you,
white lady. I'm good."
[laughing]
[indistinct conversation
at next table]
Lucy's not here.
I know. I'm just...
- looking at...
- What?
- Something.
- Okay.
[Jane chuckles]
I think it's nice
that she called.
Maybe you should call her back.
I think you should.
She doesn't even know
that I'm leaving earlier.
You should tell her.
- Did you already tell her?
- Me?
No! Nah. Mmm-mmm.
Mmm-mmm.
You're being weird. Why
are you being weird?
Why is everyone being
so fucking weird?
- [Danny clears throat]
- What?
I don't know. I...
don't think I could go.
That's fine. You
can come later.
Yeah.
- Fine. That's fine.
- What?
- I don't think I could go.
- [laughs]
I just said you
can come whenever.
I mean "go."
Like... at all.
- I'm sorry. I'm so sorry.
- What are you talking about?
I don't want to talk
about this right now.
Well, you're already
talking about it,
so... [stammering] can
you please continue?
My life... is here.
- I'm part of your life.
- Yes, yes. Of course.
I just mean... my job.
And my family and my friends.
You didn't even ask
me if I wanted to go.
You just assumed I would.
Ah, fuck it. I've just been
thinking about this so much.
And I love you, and I
want to be with you.
I really do, but...
I don't think I
could do it there.
Maybe, you know,
after a year I'll go.
Or maybe you'll come back,
make it work.
Have a great celebration.
[sighs]
[sighs]
[cell phone chimes]
[sighs]
[breathes shakily]
[Brittany] Hey.
- Hi.
- You got a sec?
Yeah, I sure do.
I'm here till 5:00.
[chuckles] Um...
I just wanted to talk to
you to let you know...
that I'm gonna be going
to Portland in a month.
Yeah, and I'll probably be
there for a little while.
Great.
- For the ex?
- Yeah.
I don't know if we're,
like... getting back together
or if this is the worst
idea in the world...
[laughs]
But I just... I wanted
to tell you because...
It's okay. Yeah.
Well, 'cause you...
'Cause you make the schedule.
Right.
Yeah. Mmm-hmm. Thank you.
- Are we okay?
- Mmm-hmm.
- Yeah, we're okay.
- Okay.
Cool.
Love ya.
[somber music playing]
[shuffling]
[music continues playing]
Are you serious?
[music playing
faintly over speakers]
Wow.
I wasn't expecting that.
Are you sure?
And you're just
realizing this recently?
I think I've known for a while.
Have you been with girls?
Mmm-hmm. One.
Did you like it?
I think maybe I liked it a
little bit more than she did.
[Ben] Mmm.
Do you want me to destroy her?
[chuckles]
I'm not really sure what to say.
You can say anything.
So, do you have a type?
[chuckles] No. I don't know.
I like brunettes with long hair
who are attracted to women.
- [laughs]
- It's funny,
I always felt like
you treated me
like your gay best friend.
But, uh, it turns
out you're mine.
Oh, I'm sorry.
I'm sorry that I...
[indistinct chatter]
couldn't tell you.
I'm sorry about the girl.
It's all good.
Good night, Ben.
- Come on.
- [chuckles]
["True Love Will Find You in the
End" by Priscilla Ahn playing]
True love will
find you In the end
You'll find out Just
who was your friend
Don't be sad
I know you will...
Oh, my aunt is a nurse.
That's... I don't know
how you guys do it.
I'm not cool with
needles. [chuckles]
Oh, but it's so satisfying
when you get the vein.
Right.
True love will find
you In the end...
[woman] So, what do you do?
Um, I'm...
I'm an artist.
[slurring] Bathroom.
- Whoa!
- [thudding]
I'm fine. I'm fine.
Oh, shit. [chuckles]
'Cause true love
Is searching too...
[laughs]
I would fuck Helen Mirren
and I'd kill Angelina.
You would fuck Helen Mirren?
That's crazy.
- No, I'll get it.
- No!
[both chuckle]
Uh, no, I'm gonna get it.
You can get the next one.
Okay.
We can go for a small pizza.
Wow.
That's generous of you.
But no sides, okay?
- Just tap water. That's it.
- [laughs]
True love will
find you In the end
Are you ready For the
weekend of your life?
With the hammock Come
with me to a hammock
Have a hammock
Sit in a hammock
Enjoy it Are you ready?
- Yeah.
- Yeah?
[gong sounding]
[wind chimes tinkling]
- Welcome... to the Hammock Sanctuary.
- [thunder rumbling]
Like the bosoms of
our foremothers,
the hammock cradles us.
If the trees of the
forest are our legs...
the hammock is our vulva.
Let's close our eyes
and allow ourselves
to be enveloped by
our mesh cocoons.
We are all seeds
of the universe,
and soon we will begin to bloom.
[thunder rumbling]
Let's close our eyes.
Let's close them.
- And we'll close them.
- Okay.
- Okay, close your eyes.
- I will.
Well, you're not closing them.
As we open our throat chakra,
I encourage you all
to release your voice
as ferociously as
the Vishuddha...
- [woman screams]
- will allow.
[yelling loudly]
That was nice, Kat.
[woman yelling]
Would it help if I rocked you?
[Jane] No, I'm okay, thank you.
- [instructor] Let me rock you.
- [Jane] I'm good.
It'd be best if I rocked you.
[man screaming]
You need to let it
out. It's in here.
- [people screaming]
- It's right in there.
It needs to come out.
[yelling loudly]
Okay, well... Jesus Christ.
[chuckles softly]
[cell phone vibrating]
[sighs softly]
Hi.
[indistinct chatter]
[slow song playing
over speakers]
What are you gonna get?
Um., maybe an omelet.
- That sounds good.
- Mmm.
[waiter] You girls ready?
Yeah. May I have an omelet
with tomato and spinach?
- [waiter] Mmm-hmm.
- Please. And an iced coffee.
Thank you.
I'll do the Chinese chicken
salad and a green tea. Thanks.
No more veggie burgers?
Just switching it up.
- Wild!
- [both chuckle]
So, when do you leave?
I'm going early, actually.
I leave next week.
Next... Wow, that's...
What made you want to do that?
Danny's not going anymore.
You and I were in a fight.
It's easier to leave than deal
with those things, I suppose.
Danny's not going?
Why? What happened?
He said he likes his life here.
Which is fine.
I'm sorry. Are you okay?
It's fine.
It's fine.
What have you been up to?
Well, I... I quit the spa.
Holy shit! That's amazing,
Lucy. Good for you.
Thanks. I started
painting again.
- Really?
- Mmm-hmm.
That's great!
And I've been on
some girl dates.
What? You don't
start with that?
- I'm just taking it slow.
- Wow!
Okay, you're playing it so cool.
What happened with BB Brit-Brit?
Oh, BB Brit-Brit, yes.
Um, she's straight.
Ah, I doubt that very much.
Yeah.
We had a try-on party.
- That is not a thing.
- It is a thing.
Okay, did you make out?
- [sighs]
- Did you make out?
You may ask me some questions
that I will say yes or no to.
Okay. Boobs in mouth?
Wow. Um, yes.
Did you go down on her?
- No.
- Did she go down on you?
- Yes.
- Um, did you finger-bang her?
- Oh, my God.
- Butt stuff? Any butt stuff?
What? Butt stuff?
Jane, that is hardcore.
You definitely did butt stuff.
- No.
- Yeah!
Oh, my God. We don't
need to talk about it.
[groans] I just can't
believe I missed all of this.
I'm... I'm...
I'm really sorry, Lucy.
- You don't have to apologize.
- Yes, I do.
And I really am.
I was just... I
don't know, I was...
I was frustrated.
You were so stuck, I
was just trying to help.
Yeah, I know.
I don't know why
I've always been
so set on solving your problems.
Hmm. Hmm.
- [laughs]
- May I venture a guess?
Have at it.
I think that perhaps,
I don't know,
maybe it's easier to focus
on someone else's problems
than face your own,
and perhaps there's
some control issues
from being forced to move
here when you were a teenager.
No, that's not it.
Oh, yeah, that's not it?
[both chuckle]
I took you for granted.
I don't know why it took
swinging in a dirty hammock
for me to realize that I
really fucking need you.
Oh, I hate this!
I feel like I've skipped a
whole season of your life.
What am I gonna miss
when I'm on the other
side of the world?
Probably butt stuff.
Okay, can we figure
out when you'll visit?
Yeah, I'll come when
you get settled.
In two weeks?
Jane, you're gonna be okay.
You're gonna love being there.
It's your home.
I mean, you speak the
language. That's good.
You make super-annoying
friends, like, really easily.
You're gonna find a new
me in, like, a week.
I will never find a new you.
I don't wanna miss
your first girlfriend.
Do you have a ride
to the airport?
Do you want me to take you?
No, you are a terrible driver.
I'm not. I feel that I'm actually
a really good driver. One car...
You have to see what's going
on behind you right now.
[man humming]
- Oh, my God! Wow!
- [giggling]
The whole thing? I've never
thought of doing that.
- But I will now.
- That is great.
[car horn honking repeatedly]
["Tarzan Boy" by
Baltimora playing]
Whoo! London Town!
- You sound like Kat.
- Wow.
That's actually the meanest
thing you've ever said to me.
And you've said some
really fucked-up shit.
[Jane] Oh.
Yeah.
[Lucy] Okay.
- Cheer up, buttercup.
- Oh, please. No.
Oh.
Is it still broken?
I thought you got that fixed.
[Lucy] Yeah, well, you just
have to open it from the inside.
It's not broken.
That sounds really safe.
Okay!
Here we go.
- Oh!
- Oh, Jesus! Shall we swap?
That's it.
[both laugh]
Okay.
- [Lucy] Whoo! [laughs]
- [Jane] Jesus!
[song continues playing
over car speakers]
Why are you smiling?
Um... What? Because
I'm happy for you.
This is really exciting.
- Are you okay?
- Yeah, I'm great.
I'm also... You know,
I'm happy for me, too.
Because I won't be here
to boss you around?
No, because I'm coming with you.
- What?
- I'm coming.
I'm gonna come on this
plane to London Town.
What are you talking about?
I know that you really like
to tell me what I need,
but I know what you need also.
And that is me, so I'm coming
for emotional support and
overall encouragement.
- Are you serious?
- Well, yes!
You had shaky
voice at the diner.
No, I didn't. It was the wind.
- You were trembling.
- How long are you gonna stay?
Well, I don't know.
Maybe a fortnight. That
means two weeks in England.
- Okay?
- Yeah, I know what a fortnight is.
It's just to get you
settled, you know?
This is crazy!
[chuckles] And I
brought you a muffin.
You can have half when we take
off and half over New York.
[both chuckle]
Oh, my God, oh, my
God, oh, my God!
We're going to London together.
I know. It's great. Hey, no.
I said half when we take
off and half over New York.
You're so bossy.
Yeah, well, that's who
I am now. I'm in charge.
What are you gonna
do with your car?
Oh.
Um, I'm gonna, uh, park it.
[Jane] What about
your passport?
[Lucy] I have it in my bag.
- [Jane] Has it expired?
- [Lucy] They expire?
[Jane] Do you have luggage?
[Lucy] I have a carry-on.
[Jane] You're gonna need
a warmer jacket than that.
[Lucy] No. Okay, that's
enough. No more talking.
["Los Ageless" by
St. Vincent playing]
In Los Ageless The
winter never comes
In Los Ageless The
mothers milk their young
But I can keep running
No, I can keep running
The Los Ageless
Hang out by the bar
Burn the pages Of
unwritten memoirs
But I can keep running
No, I can keep running
How can anybody have you?
How can anybody have
you And lose you?
How can anybody have
you And lose you
And not lose
Their minds, too?
How can anybody have you?
How can anybody have
you And lose you?
How can anybody have
you And lose you
And not lose
Their minds, too?
Oh
The last days Of the
sunset superstars
Girls in cages
Playing their guitars
But how can I leave?
I just follow the
hood Of my car
In Los Ageless The
waves, they never break
They build and build until
You don't have no escape
But how can I leave?
I just follow my
hood To the sea
Go to sleep
How can anybody have you?
How can anybody have
you And lose you?
How can anybody have
you And lose you
And not lose
Their minds, too?
Oh
Oh my Lord Oh, we
really did it now
I'm a monster And
you're my sacred cow
But I can keep running
No, I can keep on running
Oh, oh
Oh, oh, oh
How can anybody have you?
How can anybody have
you And lose you?
How can anybody have
you And lose you
And not lose
Their minds, too?
How can anybody have you?
How can anybody have
you And lose you?
How can anybody have
you And lose you
And not lose their minds?
Oh
[slow music playing]