Audacity (2015) Movie Script
1
Abre la puerta!
Abre la puerta!
Abre le!
Abre la puerta!
Abre la puerta!
[shrieks]
[glass breaking]
Help!
(male)
The time has come
for change.
For far too long
in this country,
too many of us have been
afraid to speak up
about the things that matter.
The time for change is now,
so we're gonna change
American football to rugby.
And, uh...
...helmets are for wimps.
[audience booing]
(male)
All right, sorry.
Joking about
the president, okay.
Joking about football,
okay, my bad.
The one that I'd love
to actually see
as the president
would be someone
like Arnold Schwarzenegger,
you know?
Imagine him trying
to fix the problem.
"You don't worry about
the Hummers," you know?
"I used to drive one, come on.
It's fantastic."
I love Arnold Schwarzenegger.
He's done a movie recently
with Sylvester Stallone.
Sylvester Stallone, "You know,
I'm wondering, you know,
would you like a cameo
in my latest movie?"
And Arnie's like,
"I'm too busy for a cameo.
But how 'bout a small part?"
We get call centers
ring us in Australia.
I don't know if it's
the same here.
This guy rang me up
the other day.
He's like, "Excuse me,
Mr. Price."
I thought it was my friend
doing King Julien.
I'm like, "Oh, the New York
Giants, oh, ha-ha!
"I like to move it, move it.
I like to move it, move it.
Ohh!"
It was one of those calls.
He said, "Are you interested
in doing a short survey?"
I said, "I'm not interested."
"Okay, question number two.
Why not?"
"I'm not interested."
"Number three,
would you ever consider--"
"No!"
"Thank you.
Come again."
If I offend some of you guys,
it's not my intention
'cause I want to offend
everybody equally,
if that's okay.
[slow clapping]
I'm here for the autograph.
Not yours.
Thank you, man.
Ahh.
Take my bag.
No, no, no.
I'm union, I'd better not.
So, I thought they were
gonna waterboard you
for the rugby thing.
Yeah, I know.
It was a risk,
a risk I was willing to take.
- Heh-heh.
- No risk, no reward, huh?
So when are you gonna get up
on stage and do something?
Me?
Uh, next week.
Oh, never, that's what I meant.
Never, yeah.
No, seriously, you've
got some good stuff.
- You should.
- Well, you laugh at anything.
Well, true, but then again,
I am just being polite, right?
Well, what do I owe you for
that inspiration, Tony Robbins?
No, look, seriously,
man, seriously.
I just wanna be the first
to throw something at you.
Well, you know
who liked that joke?
Nobody.
Nobody.
Oh, thanks.
Thank you.
(female)
So I noticed
you've been talking
with the new guy at work.
Peter, right?
Yeah.
He actually went
to high school with me.
He used to race bikes.
Motorcycles?
No, bicycles.
Like Lance Armstrong.
Oh, cool.
He must like
his job then.
He's doing bike
deliveries, right?
Yup, he's a mailman
on wheels.
[laughing]
I also noticed that he's been
hanging around the guy
that sounds like
the Crocodile Hunter.
Yeah, Ben.
He's Peter's buddy.
He grew up in Australia.
I'm actually becoming good
friends with both of them.
Because our departments
somewhat overlap,
we spend quite a bit of time
together at the office.
Ben moonlights as a comedian.
He's hilarious.
[gasps]
Oh no!
What?
Hailey, Ben's show was tonight,
and I totally forgot.
Oh, no.
He's especially been
getting on me
about going to this,
and I promised I would go.
(Hailey)
Ooh, busted.
I can't believe
I forgot.
I gotta text him
right away.
Ugh!
[speaking in Australian accent]
"I'm so sorry.
I beg your forgiveness."
[laughing]
So were you and Peter
good friends in high school?
No, not really.
We didn't even really
know each other.
He was just in one
of my classes.
He was pretty popular, kind
of known for being a partier.
He's different now,
though, there's--
Something's changed.
I don't really know what it is.
People change.
Yeah, they definitely do.
(male news announcer)
For some, the legalization
of gay marriage is good news,
while others find it
difficult to grasp.
Regardless of what anyone
thinks about the issue,
gay marriage has become
a present-day reality
that is spreading
across America.
Soon, to one degree or another,
each of us will have
to respond in our own way
to this current
cultural revolution.
Hi, Peter.
Can't believe you're still here.
What time's your first delivery?
I'm still trying
to wake up.
(Diana)
Oh, Ben's show
was last night.
No wonder you're tired.
How was it?
Oh, it was great.
He did so great.
Uh, he says
you do that too.
You're supposed
to be pretty good.
He said that?
I didn't say that.
He said that?
I wouldn't say that.
- No.
- Can you do one?
No.
No, no, no, no.
- Come on.
- No.
- Oh, come on.
- No, no, no, no.
Peter, just do like,
just a little one.
No.
Nobody's here.
Please?
Come on.
(Peter)
I'm not--I'm not very good.
That's okay.
All right.
Are you familiar
with Russell Crowe,
the crazy guy,
throws phones at people?
- Yes.
- All right.
- I can't do him.
- Oh, come on!
I can't do him, but I got
a mean Popeye.
I got a mean Popeye.
Wow.
Oh, man, I gotta go soon.
Oh, wow.
Are you gonna be
on time this time?
I better, 'cause I'm surprised
they're letting me
do this again.
Everyone makes mistakes.
[laughing]
Yeah, that's true.
How many times have you
run out of gas?
It's like three or four.
Okay.
No, shut up.
Shut up, shut up,
shut up.
It's seven?
It was eight-ish.
- No.
- It was in the eights.
- No, it was, like, once.
- Well, who's keeping count?
[laughing]
[under her breath]
You.
What are you looking at?
(Peter)
It's the Bible.
Oh.
So you're religious?
Well, I'm a Christian.
Since when?
Like, a year--year?
Yeah, a year ago.
Mm-hmm.
So you, like, believe it, like,
you know, that it's all true?
Yeah.
Yeah, every word.
So do you believe gay people
should be stoned?
Of course not.
(Diana)
Well, your book says that.
No, no.
Actually, I was reading
yesterday in--
You know what?
I don't wanna offend you,
but I have a sister who's gay.
And you don't know the struggle
she's been through
from people who are telling her
that she's gonna go to hell
for, what, loving someone?
And you have the audacity
to tell me
that she's going to hell?
Go on, say it.
Oh, man.
Um--
I'm sorry.
I gotta go.
I gotta go.
I'm sorry.
(Diana)
"So do you believe gay people
should be stoned?"
Whoa!
(Peter)
Sorry, sorry, sorry!
Oh, hold it, hold it, hold it
hold it, hold it, ooh.
[laughing]
[giggling]
You two look happy.
Oh, we're getting
our application
for our marriage license.
Can you believe that
we're actually doing this?
(female)
I know.
Oh, did you call
the florist?
You know what,
we'll just go there next.
(female)
Okay.
(female #2)
I feel like there's
so much to do,
and it's gonna be here
before you know it.
(female)
I know.
That's a really
cool bag.
Are you a bike messenger?
Yeah, yeah.
So what's your message?
No, I'm a bike delivery person.
It's a--I don't deliver bikes.
I--um...
I guess, bike messenger
sounds better
than bike delivery person.
[elevator bell dings]
(Peter)
Stamps Armstrong.
Well, have a nice day.
(Peter)
Yeah, you too.
Stamps Armstrong.
[elevator creaking, clanging]
[grunting]
(male operator)
Hello, is there
a problem?
(Peter)
Yeah, I'm stuck
in the elevator.
The doors won't open.
I'm halfway down the floor.
(operator)
Okay, there's been
a malfunction.
Yeah.
(operator)
Try pressing the door
open button.
It's not working.
It's not doing anything.
It won't open.
I mean, the doors
are open but--slightly.
(operator)
Hang on, I'm entering a code.
Okay, now try pushing
the doors open.
All right, the doors are open.
Thanks.
(operator)
Okay, now I want you
to wait there
until the repair crew arrives.
Don't let anyone in.
What?
No, no, no.
I have to go.
I have to deliver a package.
(operator)
You don't understand.
Someone could die.
I'll figure something out.
I can't wait here, okay?
(operator)
Hey, this is serious.
You need to warn people.
You cannot leave.
Hey, can anybody help me?
Is there anybody here?
All right.
What's this?
Hey! You gotta stay and watch
this elevator for me.
If anybody gets
on this elevator,
they're gonna die.
So just stay here,
make sure nobody gets on.
I'll be right back.
I'll be right back.
(female)
I still can't believe that
we're getting married.
[laughing]
I never thought that I'd be
holding this application.
Oh, there's a caf down
on the second floor.
Let's just eat there.
And then the florist
isn't too far from here.
(female #2)
Sounds good.
(female)
What do you think your
brother is going to say?
(female #2)
I don't know, but he's going
to have to say something now.
[laughing]
[screaming]
Noooo!
Noooo!
Noooo!
[screaming]
[elevator crashing]
No, no!
Ah!
(male announcer)
Ray Comfort's been talking
with people on the street
about what they
believe for years.
He's not afraid to ask some
very personal questions,
and as a result, he gets some
very interesting answers.
Watch this.
(Ray Comfort)
I noticed when I came up,
you two were kissing in public.
You are obviously gay.
Do you think homosexuals should
be allowed to be married?
Definitely, 100%.
(Ray Comfort)
Are you two married?
Um, no, we're not married.
(Ray Comfort)
Are you thinking
of getting married?
Yes.
(Ray Comfort)
What do you think
of gay marriage?
I love gay marriage.
I have a lot of gay friends.
I love the gay community,
and I think everybody
should be able to love
who they wanna love,
no matter if you love a woman
or a man, who cares?
(Ray Comfort)
What do you think
of gay marriage?
I'm not opposed to it.
Gay marriage, I think
they should be able
to do whatever they want.
I think that everyone should be
free to marry who they want.
(Ray Comfort)
Do you think it's morally
okay to be gay?
Yes, it is.
It's not a lifestyle.
It's not a choice.
It's who you are.
You can't help the fact
that you love a man,
you can't help the fact
that you love a woman.
(Ray Comfort)
Do you think
it's morally okay?
Sure.
I think it is morally okay.
It's their choice.
They have the same rights
as everyone else.
Love is love.
Who cares who you love
as long as you're happy.
(Ray Comfort)
Are you gay?
I am.
(Ray Comfort)
Are you gay?
I am gay, yes.
(Ray Comfort)
You gay?
- Yes.
(Ray Comfort)
When did you discover
you were gay?
Last year.
(Ray Comfort)
Do you think people
are born gay?
No.
(Ray Comfort)
So it's--
they choose to be gay?
Yes, I think they
choose to be gay.
(Ray Comfort)
Are people born that way?
I believe so.
I was.
(Ray Comfort)
Do you think people
are born gay?
Yes, definitely.
(Ray Comfort)
Do you think people
are born with tendencies
to commit adultery?
Um, I don't--
No, I don't believe so.
(Ray Comfort)
What about to fornicate?
No.
(Ray Comfort)
I was born with
those tendencies.
Everyone's born with a desire
to do what we wanna do
even if, you know,
even if it's wrong.
I know adultery's wrong
and fornication's wrong,
but I still wanted to do it.
I was born like it.
Couldn't help it.
The desires overtook me.
But it doesn't make it right.
Does that make sense?
That does make sense.
(Ray Comfort)
I was born that way.
You were?
(Ray Comfort)
Yeah, right from the time
I was a little kid,
when I saw girls,
I wanted to be with one.
Most guys are like that, they
got red blood in their veins.
I mean, women are attractive.
Yeah, we are.
(Ray Comfort)
So we're kind of
born that way
in the sense we like to do
that which is wrong.
Fornicate and commit adultery,
comes naturally to us.
Does that make sense?
It does.
(Ray Comfort)
So do you think the same--it's
the same with homosexuality?
People are born with a nature
that does what they wanna do
rather than what God says?
Yes.
(Ray Comfort)
Do you think they're born
that way?
They're born that way.
(Ray Comfort)
You sure?
You think people are
born adulterers?
- Are born what?
- Adulterers.
Like, they cheat?
(Ray Comfort)
Yeah, wanting to cheat
on people.
It's in our human nature.
(Ray Comfort)
It's in our human nature?
Yeah.
(Ray Comfort)
You think people are
born fornicators?
[laughing]
Um...
(Ray Comfort)
What do you think?
Actually, it is choice.
It is choice.
(Ray Comfort)
Choice?
You've changed your mind?
Yeah, you just--yeah.
You enlightened me real fast.
Honestly, this is actually
a very good argument.
(Ray Comfort)
Does that make sense?
Yes.
- That makes sense, yeah.
- Sure, it makes sense.
(Ray Comfort)
Does that make sense?
Makes sense, yeah.
The way you're saying it,
logically, it makes sense.
(Diana)
You know, it was so inexpensive,
and it's the same as the one
we saw in the mall
the other day.
It looks so cute on you.
Thank you.
I gotta go.
I'll talk to you later.
(Peter)
That shirt looks
sooo cute on you.
(Diana)
Stop, you are such a creeper.
Huh-huh-huh.
[laughing]
Hey, this is gonna
sound strange.
Do you have a sister?
(Diana)
Mm-hmm.
Yeah, I do.
Is she gay?
No.
Why do you ask?
I had a dream last night.
(Diana)
About my sister?
She's married with kids.
I gotta ask you
another question too.
Okay.
What do you think
of gay marriage?
Well, I think that people
who love each other
should have the right
to get married.
Don't you?
I think there's more
to it than that.
I'm a Christian,
and the Bible--
The Bible says a lot
of stuff, though.
I mean, doesn't it say that God
sends gay people to hell?
You're missing
the point.
Jesus came to save
people from hell.
(Diana)
Don't get me wrong.
I believe in God.
It's just that my God
doesn't damn people to hell
just 'cause
they're different.
Let me show you something.
This is a Christian
talking to a gay couple.
(Diana)
I'd really rather not.
These people are
so condescending
and judgmental
and I just--
Why is the Bible
so against sex?
The Bible's not against sex.
The whole thing
starts with God
telling two naked people
to have sex.
They're literally
halfway home.
And I know there are
psychos out there
holding up hateful signs
about gay people,
but most Christians
aren't like that.
That's not even Christian.
Watch how it ends.
(Ray Comfort)
Anything else
you'd like to say?
- No, thank you.
- You finished?
Yep, I'm all good.
Thank you for being so, I guess,
kind and understanding
and not very
judgmental about it.
Fine.
(Ray Comfort)
Do you believe in God?
Yes, I believe in God.
(Ray Comfort)
What does God think
of homosexuality?
I think God is okay
with homosexuality.
(Ray Comfort)
So what does God think
of homosexuality?
That's a stupid question.
I think He should
just stay out of it.
(Ray Comfort)
Are you a spiritual person?
I am.
I believe in God.
(Ray Comfort)
Okay, so what does God
think of homosexuality?
He thinks it's a sin.
He thinks it's wrong.
He frowns upon it, but He still
loves me at the end of the day
since we're all sinners.
I know God wants people
to be happy.
Since I didn't choose
my sexual orientation,
so then why would He--
If He really didn't
like gay people,
why would He allow them to roam
around the earth so free?
(Ray Comfort)
Well, the same reason
He allows adulterers
and fornicators and liars
and thieves
to roam around the earth.
That's from the Christian Bible.
It's 1 Corinthians chapter 6,
verses 9 and 10.
Could you read it out loud?
It says, "Do not be deceived.
Neither fornicators,
nor idolaters, nor adulterers,
nor homosexuals, nor sodomites,
nor thieves will inherit
the kingdom of God."
(Ray Comfort)
What do you think
of that verse?
That one's really complicated.
(Ray Comfort)
It says, "Adulterers won't
inherit God's kingdom,
nor will fornicators,
nor will homosexuals."
So what do you think of that?
Um, it's a nice verse.
I'm glad you told that to me.
(Ray Comfort)
Could I give you
a Bible verse to read
and see what you think of it?
No.
(Ray Comfort)
Did you hear the second word?
It says, "idolaters."
Do you know what
that means?
I do not.
(Ray Comfort)
Well, an idolater
is somebody
who makes up a god
in their own image.
It's a violation of
the first and the second
of the Ten Commandments
where God says,
"Number one, you shall have
no other gods before Me."
And the Second Commandment says,
"Don't make yourself a graven
image," or a false god.
We tend to make a god up
in our minds
that we feel comfortable with,
a god that doesn't mind
adultery or fornication,
homosexuality, lying,
and stealing.
And we cuddle up to
that snuggly little god
we feel comfortable with,
but he's not the god
we have to face
on Judgment Day.
So according to the Bible,
will adulterers get into heaven?
No.
(Ray Comfort)
Fornicators?
No.
(Ray Comfort)
Homosexuals?
No.
(Ray Comfort)
That's the warning
of Scripture.
And if you don't receive
that warning,
then I can't do anything
for you.
I'm a Christian,
and I've got a dilemma.
If I say, "Homosexuals won't
inherit the kingdom of God,"
I'm called a hater, with
hate speech, and intolerant.
But if I say they will,
I'm lying as a Christian,
'cause I believe God's Word.
"Do not be deceived."
(Ray Comfort)
Why do you think it begins
with those words?
What do you think, Cody?
(Ray Comfort)
Why do you think the Bible
begins with those words,
"Don't be deceived"?
(male)
Do not be deceived.
I don't know.
(Ray Comfort)
'Cause people are deceived
when it comes to this issue.
Okay.
I accept Christ
into my heart,
and that's all that
I need to be able--
(Ray Comfort)
Well, no, you've got to repent,
turn from all sin.
No lying, stealing, adultery,
fornication, homosexuality.
You've gotta turn from all sin.
I can do that
on my deathbed
if I really don't believe
that I'll make it.
(Ray Comfort)
Will homosexuals inherit
the kingdom of God,
according to the Bible?
Absolutely not.
(Ray Comfort)
Thank you very much, ladies,
for talking to me.
I really appreciate it.
No worries.
(Ray Comfort)
If I care about homosexuals,
I'll warn them too.
Does that make sense?
- That makes sense, yeah.
- Sure, it makes sense.
(Ray Comfort)
Anything else
you'd like to say?
- No, thank you.
- You finished?
Yep, I'm all good.
Thank you for being so, I guess,
kind and understanding
and not very judgmental
about it.
Can I go back?
I accept Christ
into my heart.
They were Christians.
(Peter)
A lot of people make
professions of faith in Christ
and then they just continue to
live however they wanna live.
It's called self-deception
when we do that.
Hey, thanks for letting me
talk to you about this.
Yeah.
(Peter)
Oh, I gotta--oh, Ben
has a show tonight.
You should come
to the show.
Sure.
Um, before you go, I just have
a quick favor to ask.
My brother, Eric, has
really bad cancer.
He's dying and he has a wife
and three beautiful kids.
Why is this happening?
What did he do
to deserve this?
I'm so angry at God.
(Peter)
I'm really sorry that
that's happening to you.
I'll definitely
pray for you.
Thanks.
Hey, what do you think?
I think they make me look cool.
(female)
Cool?
You're trying on sunglasses
from a liquor store.
Cool is not possible.
You need to get in here?
No hurry.
You two together,
or do we have a line?
We're together.
(female)
Don't stare, but do you see
that guy standing over there?
I've been watching him
pace back and forth.
There's something really
weird about him.
Maybe he just needs
some sunglasses.
I'm serious.
I think he might have
stolen something.
You want anything?
(Ben)
I'm good.
I don't eat before a gig.
Butterflies.
You eat butterflies?
(Ben)
Yeah, I do.
[laughing]
(Peter)
Oh, I got a joke for you,
by the way.
- Yeah?
- Knock, knock.
- Really?
- Yeah.
Who's there?
Interrupting starfish.
Interrupting star--oh!
Come on.
[Peter laughs]
Do you get it?
- Yeah, I got it.
- It's a closer.
(Ben)
Right in the face.
How 'bout these?
Get on the floor now!
Get on the floor now!
Get down now, get down!
Everybody, get down.
Get on the ground.
You wanna be on the ground,
or underneath it?
Get down!
Are those cameras on?
Are they recording?
No, no.
Yes, yes.
- No, yes, which one?
- Yes, yes.
Give me the cash.
I need the cash now.
Nobody pays with
cash anymore.
Aghh!
(Ray Comfort)
We aren't calling for
the stoning of gays.
We aren't calling for
the stoning of anyone.
Think of the woman caught
in the act of adultery.
They wanted to stone her to
death, but she was repentant.
She put her trust in Jesus,
and He said,
"Go your way
and sin no more."
[cell phone dings]
[exhales]
God...
...if You can hear me,
please protect Peter.
Open the safe
or I open her skull.
(Peter)
No, no, no,
no, no, man.
(female)
No, please.
No, look, if you hurt her,
then you gotta answer to God.
(thief)
What?!
What are you, Mother Teresa?
Huh?
What, am I gonna go to hell?
Hey, just leave
her alone, man.
Just hand me the gun.
Yeah?
Yeah?
You want the gun?
You want the gun?
How about I give you
my bullets instead?
(Peter)
No, no, no, no, no.
And where are these two gonna go
if I pull the trigger, huh?
(Peter)
No, no.
Look, if you're gonna shoot
somebody, shoot me.
Oh God, I don't wanna die.
I don't wanna die.
Look, just don't shoot
anybody, okay?
Aghhh!
[police sirens wailing]
(thief)
No, no, no, this
isn't happening.
This isn't happening.
Who called 'em?
Did you call the cops?
No!
Get up, get up.
Get up.
Shut up.
Get down.
Get back.
All right.
All right.
- Get back, get back.
- Help.
Shut up!
Put your gun down.
Back off!
Put it down now,
and you will not get hurt.
(male)
Let her go.
(female)
Somebody help me.
(male)
It's not worth it, man.
Let her go.
(female)
Help!
Somebody help me.
[crying]
- Back off or I'll shoot her.
- Let her go!
She's gonna die, and it's
gonna be all your fault.
(male)
Sir, put your weapon
down now.
Put your weapon down.
Put it down now
and let her go.
No one will hurt you.
(thief)
Get back!
Get back!
I will shoot her.
(male)
Go, go, go, go!
Move in.
Move in.
Hurry up.
Grab the gun.
Stay on the ground.
Stay down.
Put your hands
behind your head.
Aghh.
Aghh-hah.
Thanks, man.
[cell phone dings]
Thank you.
(Ray Comfort)
So what about you?
If you were to die today,
where would you go?
Do you believe
in an afterlife?
Oh, man, I am the guy
that believes
in infinite possibilities.
(Ray Comfort)
Do you believe
in God's existence?
I don't really have a belief
in anything, to be honest.
(Ray Comfort)
Now, do you think
you're a good person?
Absolutely.
(Ray Comfort)
Do you think you're
a good person, Kyle?
Yes.
Whoa.
The way I judge myself, yeah.
I believe I am, yeah.
I'm a fabulous person.
(Ray Comfort)
Do you think you're
a good person?
Are you gonna
make it to heaven?
I am gonna
make it to heaven.
(Ray Comfort)
Do you think you'll go to heaven
or hell when you die?
If I don't repent
of my homosexuality,
I will most definitely
go to hell.
(Ray Comfort)
You said you were
a good person.
Let's go through some
of the Ten Commandments
and see how you do.
How many lies do you think
you've told in your whole life?
Heaps.
(Ray Comfort)
What about you?
Heaps.
I think I tell two lies a day.
(Ray Comfort)
Whoa!
Have you ever stolen
something in your whole life,
even if it's small,
irrespective of its value?
Yes.
(Ray Comfort)
Have you ever stolen something,
even if it's small?
Yes, I have.
(Ray Comfort)
Now, Jesus said, "If you look
at a woman and lust for her
you commit adultery
with her in your heart."
Have you ever looked
at a woman with lust?
I've done that probably
15 times on the way here.
(Ray Comfort)
Have you ever looked
at a woman with lust?
I'm gay, so I do not ever
look at women.
(Ray Comfort)
And what about you, Kyle?
Yes, I sure have.
(Ray Comfort)
At a guy?
Of course.
(Ray Comfort)
You ever used
God's name in vain?
Yes, I have.
(Ray Comfort)
Have you ever used
God's name in vain?
Yes.
(Ray Comfort)
Okay, that's called blasphemy.
Have you done it?
Well, yeah.
[laughing]
(Ray Comfort)
Now, have you ever
used God's name in vain?
Um--
(Ray Comfort)
"Oh my G-O-D."
Oh, yeah.
(Ray Comfort)
It's called blasphemy
when you do that.
So, a little bit
of bad news here.
I'm not judging you,
but by your own admission,
you're a lying thief
and a blasphemer.
And you have to face God
on Judgment Day.
So if you face God
on Judgment Day
and He judges you by
the Ten Commandments,
are you gonna be innocent
or guilty?
I'll be guilty.
(Ray Comfort)
If He judges you by
the Ten Commandments,
bearing in mind by
your own admission,
you're a lying thief
and a blasphemer,
would you be innocent or guilty?
Innocent.
(Ray Comfort)
Why?
Because I'm living my life
He want--
like, the way He wants me to.
I'm going to school.
I'm here.
I'm not on drugs.
I don't have a baby.
I'm not married.
I don't have sex every day.
I do, I admit it, I should have
waited 'til I got married,
but I was young and dumb
and I experienced it,
and it was a great experience
of my life.
(Ray Comfort)
Let's back up here.
You've just told me
you're a lying thief,
a blasphemer,
and a fornicator.
I am.
Yes.
(Ray Comfort)
And the Bible says fornicators
won't inherit God's kingdom,
neither will liars or thieves
or blasphemers.
So you're in big trouble
on Judgment Day.
And what about you?
I'll be guilty.
(Ray Comfort)
Would you go
to heaven or hell?
I would like to think
I'd go to heaven.
(Ray Comfort)
Well, the Bible says all liars
will have their part
in the lake of fire.
By my standings and where
I'm at right now,
I will be going to hell.
But I would love
to go to heaven.
I would hope that I wouldn't
end up in hell.
That sounds like
I'm going to hell.
(Ray Comfort)
Does that concern you?
Yeah, that would concern me.
Yeah, on some level, for sure.
(Ray Comfort)
Now, what can you do to be made
right with God?
How can you be justified?
How can you have
your sins forgiven?
Do you have any idea?
I go to church.
(Ray Comfort)
Well, that won't help.
You got to do something else.
I'm here at school.
I'm living my life.
(Ray Comfort)
Yeah, but so--
I'm here on earth.
He put me here for a reason.
(Ray Comfort)
But that doesn't wash
away your sins.
You need a Savior.
Someone who can wash away
your sins, so on Judgment Day,
you won't receive justice,
you'll receive mercy.
Because the Bible says
if you die in your sins
you'll end up in hell.
I'd hate that to happen to you.
Now, do you know what God
did for guilty sinners
so we wouldn't have
to go to hell?
Any idea?
Do you know what God did
so guilty sinners wouldn't
have to go to hell?
Any idea?
No.
No, what did He do?
(Ray Comfort)
Well, 2,000 years ago,
God became a human being,
Jesus of Nazareth, and He gave
His life on the cross
to take the punishment
for the sin of the world.
You and I violated God's law,
and Jesus paid our fine.
(male)
If I die, either way,
I'm gonna be dead.
(Ray Comfort)
Well, would you go--
are you sure about that?
Well, nobody knows for sure.
(Ray Comfort)
Well, God knows.
That's very true, but we
haven't spoken to God.
(Ray Comfort)
Well, He's spoken to us
through His Word.
The Bible says very clearly,
"It is appointed to man
once to die
and after this the judgment."
If you stand before God on
Judgment Day, in your sins,
you'd be guilty and you'd end up
in hell according to the Bible.
That's why you need the Savior.
That's why you need what
Christ did on the cross.
You've got to repent of all sin
and trust in Jesus alone.
If you're in court and someone
pays your fine,
the judge can dismiss your case.
He can say, "This person's
guilty, but they're out of here
because the fine's paid."
Well, God can let you
live forever.
He can commute
your death sentence
because of what Jesus did
on the cross.
Suffering and dying
for the sin of the world
and then rising from the dead.
If you're in a court of law
and you're guilty,
the judge can say,
"Oh, this person's guilty,
but the fine's paid,
so they're out of here."
God can let you live forever
because Jesus paid
your fine on the cross,
through His life's blood,
then He rose from the dead
and defeated death.
What you've gotta do is repent
and trust alone in Him.
Turn from sin and trust in Him.
It's like you trust a parachute.
When you jump out of a plane,
you don't try and save yourself
by flapping your arms.
You can't save yourself.
Same with God.
You've gotta trust
alone in Jesus;
don't try and save yourself.
That's what the Bible says.
Does that make sense?
It does.
(Ray Comfort)
And what you have to do
is repent and trust in Him.
The minute you do that,
God'll dismiss your case.
He'll forgive your sins
and legally grant you
everlasting life.
That's the good news
of the gospel.
Does that make sense?
Yes.
(Ray Comfort)
Okay, summation.
If you were to die today,
according to the Word of God,
and God gave you justice,
you'd end up in hell.
There are two things you
have to do to be saved.
You've gotta repent
and trust alone in Jesus.
When are you gonna do that?
Starting today.
(Ray Comfort)
In the quietness
of your heart,
don't wait 'til
you go to church,
today repent
and trust in Christ.
That's what I'm saying
so that you're assured
of your sins being forgiven.
Does that make sense?
It does.
I have a question for you.
Can you tell that
I'm a lesbian?
(Ray Comfort)
No.
No.
How would I tell that?
No, I'm just saying,
do we have, like, a--
do we look like
a certain way?
Can you tell?
'Cause you've been
talking to a lesbian
for the past 20 minutes.
(Ray Comfort)
I pray that God will lead me
to the right people
and He's led me to you
and it's--
He did.
I'm glad.
(Ray Comfort)
And it's been great
to talk to you.
Trust alone in Jesus.
He's the only Savior
that God has provided.
Does this make sense?
(male)
Totally makes sense.
(male)
Hey, Peter.
Hey, did you get done
with the police report yet?
Yeah, I just finished.
You almost took a bullet
for us in there,
and, well, we wanna
buy you dinner.
I mean, just to go our separate
ways seems kind of weird.
(Peter)
Thanks, but I gotta take
my buddy to his comedy show.
He's late.
Well, is it possible for you
to just drop him off
and then come with us
for a quick bite?
It'd mean a lot
to us, really.
All that crime fighting
has made me hungry.
Great.
Do you know where Tino's is?
It's right down
the street.
Sure, yeah, I could meet
you guys there, 45 minutes?
Cool.
All right, we'll see you then.
(male)
I still can't believe
you did that.
Can I get an iced tea please?
- Yeah.
- Thank you.
Why would you do that?
'Cause I like iced tea.
Seriously, though,
you don't even know us.
(male #2)
You tell that guy
to shoot you instead of us.
Yeah, that took
a lot of courage.
Actually, I was terrified.
But I'm a Christian, so I know
where I'll go when I die.
You're a Christian?
You know we're gay, right?
(Peter)
Yeah, I figured that when
I saw you guys holding hands
before the guy came
at you with his gun.
Yeah, but don't most Christians
pretty much hate gays?
(Peter)
No, that's not true.
We don't hate anyone.
Your table's ready.
Wonderful.
[exhales]
(male #2)
Well, this is a first.
I can't say we've
ever taken a Christian
out for dinner before.
You know, I actually have some
questions about the Bible
and what it says
about being gay.
Really?
That's weird.
I was just looking
into that.
Why?
Why would you do that?
(Peter)
I had this
crazy nightmare.
It left me thinking
that if I'm not true
to what the Bible says
about homosexuality,
it's like not warning people
about a faulty elevator
before they step onto it.
So if I really love people,
then I have to say something.
Love can't stay silent.
Okay.
Love.
Okay, so if God is love,
then why is there so much
suffering and death?
And if homosexuality
is such an abomination,
then why is the word
"abomination"
used to describe
eating shellfish?
And how come the word
"homosexuality" hasn't been
in the Bible until
a few decades ago?
Okay, one at a time.
So it is true that the word
"homosexuality" wasn't in there
because the word
hadn't been invented yet.
It was coined sometime
around 1900.
But the original Greek word
that was in there,
that's the exact equivalent
to the modern word
of "homosexuality."
I didn't know that.
Okay, what about
the shellfish?
(female)
That comes with baked potato
and glazed vegetables.
(male #2)
No, we're just
not ready to order yet.
(female)
Oh, okay.
No rush.
Could you give this
to Tino, please?
Look, here's something
that I've been reading.
One of these might
answer some questions
about why God allows suffering.
I think you'll find
both pretty useful.
(male #2)
Um, okay,
you know what?
I think we should go.
What?
We appreciate everything
you did, but we're done here.
(male)
What's your problem?
So he just gave us
some Christian stuff.
Let's go.
I'm not going anywhere.
What's your problem?
I'm not gonna sit here
and listen to this.
He saved our lives.
I really didn't mean
to offend you guys.
(male #2)
Oh, I know, I know.
You and every other homophobe
never mean to offend,
yet you still tell us that we're
going to hell unless we change,
and I've just
heard it all before
and I'm done listening.
(male)
Don't do this.
Listen, I am not going
back in the closet,
and I will not deny
my sexuality.
(male)
He didn't do anything.
(male #2)
It's fine.
Get converted.
See if I care.
Do not bring that
into our home.
(Peter)
I really didn't mean
to offend you guys.
(male)
No, you didn't do anything.
I mean, you can say
whatever you want.
I won't be offended.
No, but I understand
why he's mad.
I do.
Do you understand what
it's like to be in our shoes?
Do you have any clue, you know,
just the basic stuff
that we go through?
I know that this
is complicated,
and I don't wanna sound
like a know-it-all,
but you two saw what I was
willing to do for you today.
There are many other Christians
that would do the same thing
because they genuinely
care about you.
I don't doubt that about you,
I just--
(Peter)
The bottom line is that
I believe the Bible.
Even though I'm terrified to do
it, I have to speak the truth,
no matter what
people think of me.
It's not even about me.
It's about this
wonderful loving God
that sent His Son
to die on the cross
and rise from the dead
so that sinners
could be forgiven
and have everlasting life.
(female)
Okay, so what can I get
for you guys?
(male)
We're not ready.
But you're doing
a great job.
Here's a million dollars,
under the table.
[laughing]
Now I can quit.
More than just
some vain emotion
True love does what
others fail to do
You know that
I care about you
So I won't let
the world around us
tell me what to think
or say or do
You know it's true
So don't you know, love,
love can't stay silent
It's gotta wake the world
Oh, it's gotta
tell the truth
Oh, don't you know, love,
love can't stay silent
It's all that I can do
You know, I really love you
Love can't stay silent
(Ben)
I don't know how many people
know the Simpsons.
I've got the Homer Simpson GPS.
"You'll be driving along the 71,
we're going to take
the next exit on the left.
Wait, was it the left
or was it the right?
Hang on, think.
What are we gonna--doh!
I dunno.
Just stop here for some donuts.
Mmm, donuts.
Is there anything
they can't do?"
Who wants to come
for a drive with me?
They remade "Charlie
and the Chocolate Factory."
Johnny Depp got the role.
Robert De Niro was asked
to play the role of Willy Wonka.
Can you imagine?
Robert De Niro, Willy Wonka.
"Hey, listen to me, Charlie.
Hey, don't mess with me.
Hey, don't, don't mess--
don't mess with me.
You are good.
Yes, you--yes, you are--
yes, yes, you are.
You've gotta get--
yes, you do.
Yes, you do.
I am watching you."
Hey, thank you.
Hey.
Come on, y'all.
One more time,
give it up, come on.
[audience applauding]
All right.
[audience cheering]
Please, he wasn't that funny.
All right, consider this
a union gig.
We're gonna take
a 5-minute break.
If you're a government worker,
that's about an hour.
Everybody else, 5 minutes.
Go in back, get yourself an
overpriced, watered-down drink.
Five minutes, everybody.
Hey.
Oh, I'm so glad
you're okay.
Yeah, that was crazy,
wasn't it?
I can't believe
that happened to you.
Me neither.
I, uh, I actually prayed.
No, you didn't.
Yeah, I did.
I can't remember
the last time I did that.
Wow.
Well, thank you very much.
So I've been watching the videos
that you showed me,
like, all day today.
And I haven't told
anyone this yet,
but I'm kinda starting
to feel a little nervous
because it's starting
to all make sense.
(Peter)
Right.
You know, the whole thing
about heaven and hell and--
(Peter)
Right.
So you understand the gospel,
the main message of the Bible?
I think so.
We're sinners and Jesus
can save us?
Right.
Well, Jesus came to die on
the cross for sinners, yeah.
So when you turn away from sin
and you put your faith in Him,
then you're saved from
the punishment you deserve.
[cell phone ringing]
Oh, sorry, I have
to take this real quick.
Yeah.
Hey, Katie, what's going on?
(Katie on phone)
Eric isn't doing
good at all.
I need to take him to
the emergency room right now.
Can you watch the kids?
(Diana)
Yeah, of course.
I'm on my way.
(host)
Welcome back, everybody.
Thank you very much
for being here once again.
Can I tell you, you're a better
crowd than last night.
That's all I'm--
I don't wanna insinuate
that they weren't
very bright but--
flattery will get me
everywhere--
the crowd last night,
if the joke didn't begin
with "Knock, knock,"
it was a little rough.
I would like to introduce
our next act,
but apparently he's about
as punctual as Axl Rose.
We don't have a next act is
what I'm trying to tell you.
And I'm really not even kidding.
We, uh, we don't have
a next act.
What?
It's ridiculous.
(host)
Okay, so here's the deal.
I want my money back!
(host)
You can all be really mad,
start throwing stuff at me,
or we could keep
this party going
because we're like the NSA.
I happen to know that
there are some people
in this crowd tonight
who are actually funny.
In fact, the whole night
you've been looking up here
and going, "I could be
funnier than that guy."
[engine stalls]
Hi.
Yeah, um, I ran out of gas.
So now is your chance.
Where are our wise guys?
And just in case
you need to be bribed,
the food here, almost
better than airplane food.
We'll actually feed you
and your table
if you're willing
to come up here.
Where is our first funnyman?
[exhaling]
(voice on phone)
Hey, this is Peter.
Leave me a message.
I'll call you back.
Unless you're a telemarketer.
[beeping]
Hi, Peter.
It's Diana.
Um, sorry I had
to go earlier.
I just wanted to let you know
that I've really been thinking
about everything
we've been talking about,
and I've even been
feeling bad about my...
...sin.
[giggling]
Yeah, I said the word "sin."
Hey, uh, there's
a lot of you here.
You guys like impersonations?
Yeah.
All right, this
is Russell Crowe.
"Are you not entertained?"
[laughing]
[applauding]
And if you're not entertained,
I'll throw a phone at your face.
[audience applauding]
Abre la puerta!
Abre la puerta!
[gasps]
No!
Abre le!
Abre la puerta!
Abre la puerta!
Abre la puerta!
Abre la puerta!
[screaming]
[glass breaking]
Help!
[train horn blowing]
Rapido!
[vehicles crashing]
(voice on phone)
Hi, Peter.
It's Diana.
Sorry I had to go earlier.
I just wanted to let you know
that I've really been thinking
about everything we've been
talking about,
and I've even been
feeling bad about my...
...sin.
[Diana giggling]
Yeah, I said the word "sin."
Anyway, I've actually been
reading the Bible,
and it's really making me think.
But I'm not quite there yet.
I definitely have
some questions.
So as I've been reading,
I've noticed that God
often gives people
second chances,
and I like that because, oh,
I could use a second chance.
So I just wanted to say thanks.
I know I've been arguing
with you about God and stuff,
but you've been nice enough
to put up with me.
So, thank you for not
giving up on me.
You're a true friend.
(female news reporter)
A dramatic rescue happened
just hours ago
when a woman was almost
crushed by an oncoming train.
The rescue effort
almost turned tragic
when the victim refused
to be rescued.
I spoke with the hero's
cousin earlier.
(male)
My cousin said that when
the train was coming,
he was trying to get her
out of the car
but she just kept
screaming at him
and looking at him like
he was evil or something.
I mean, he had to break the car
window just to get her out.
She didn't understand
what he was trying to do.
I mean, she thought he
was trying to hurt her.
What she didn't realize is he
was actually trying to save her.
So there you have it,
a selfless act of courage
from an apparent enemy
who turned out to be a friend.
Abre la puerta!
Abre la puerta!
Abre le!
Abre la puerta!
Abre la puerta!
[shrieks]
[glass breaking]
Help!
(male)
The time has come
for change.
For far too long
in this country,
too many of us have been
afraid to speak up
about the things that matter.
The time for change is now,
so we're gonna change
American football to rugby.
And, uh...
...helmets are for wimps.
[audience booing]
(male)
All right, sorry.
Joking about
the president, okay.
Joking about football,
okay, my bad.
The one that I'd love
to actually see
as the president
would be someone
like Arnold Schwarzenegger,
you know?
Imagine him trying
to fix the problem.
"You don't worry about
the Hummers," you know?
"I used to drive one, come on.
It's fantastic."
I love Arnold Schwarzenegger.
He's done a movie recently
with Sylvester Stallone.
Sylvester Stallone, "You know,
I'm wondering, you know,
would you like a cameo
in my latest movie?"
And Arnie's like,
"I'm too busy for a cameo.
But how 'bout a small part?"
We get call centers
ring us in Australia.
I don't know if it's
the same here.
This guy rang me up
the other day.
He's like, "Excuse me,
Mr. Price."
I thought it was my friend
doing King Julien.
I'm like, "Oh, the New York
Giants, oh, ha-ha!
"I like to move it, move it.
I like to move it, move it.
Ohh!"
It was one of those calls.
He said, "Are you interested
in doing a short survey?"
I said, "I'm not interested."
"Okay, question number two.
Why not?"
"I'm not interested."
"Number three,
would you ever consider--"
"No!"
"Thank you.
Come again."
If I offend some of you guys,
it's not my intention
'cause I want to offend
everybody equally,
if that's okay.
[slow clapping]
I'm here for the autograph.
Not yours.
Thank you, man.
Ahh.
Take my bag.
No, no, no.
I'm union, I'd better not.
So, I thought they were
gonna waterboard you
for the rugby thing.
Yeah, I know.
It was a risk,
a risk I was willing to take.
- Heh-heh.
- No risk, no reward, huh?
So when are you gonna get up
on stage and do something?
Me?
Uh, next week.
Oh, never, that's what I meant.
Never, yeah.
No, seriously, you've
got some good stuff.
- You should.
- Well, you laugh at anything.
Well, true, but then again,
I am just being polite, right?
Well, what do I owe you for
that inspiration, Tony Robbins?
No, look, seriously,
man, seriously.
I just wanna be the first
to throw something at you.
Well, you know
who liked that joke?
Nobody.
Nobody.
Oh, thanks.
Thank you.
(female)
So I noticed
you've been talking
with the new guy at work.
Peter, right?
Yeah.
He actually went
to high school with me.
He used to race bikes.
Motorcycles?
No, bicycles.
Like Lance Armstrong.
Oh, cool.
He must like
his job then.
He's doing bike
deliveries, right?
Yup, he's a mailman
on wheels.
[laughing]
I also noticed that he's been
hanging around the guy
that sounds like
the Crocodile Hunter.
Yeah, Ben.
He's Peter's buddy.
He grew up in Australia.
I'm actually becoming good
friends with both of them.
Because our departments
somewhat overlap,
we spend quite a bit of time
together at the office.
Ben moonlights as a comedian.
He's hilarious.
[gasps]
Oh no!
What?
Hailey, Ben's show was tonight,
and I totally forgot.
Oh, no.
He's especially been
getting on me
about going to this,
and I promised I would go.
(Hailey)
Ooh, busted.
I can't believe
I forgot.
I gotta text him
right away.
Ugh!
[speaking in Australian accent]
"I'm so sorry.
I beg your forgiveness."
[laughing]
So were you and Peter
good friends in high school?
No, not really.
We didn't even really
know each other.
He was just in one
of my classes.
He was pretty popular, kind
of known for being a partier.
He's different now,
though, there's--
Something's changed.
I don't really know what it is.
People change.
Yeah, they definitely do.
(male news announcer)
For some, the legalization
of gay marriage is good news,
while others find it
difficult to grasp.
Regardless of what anyone
thinks about the issue,
gay marriage has become
a present-day reality
that is spreading
across America.
Soon, to one degree or another,
each of us will have
to respond in our own way
to this current
cultural revolution.
Hi, Peter.
Can't believe you're still here.
What time's your first delivery?
I'm still trying
to wake up.
(Diana)
Oh, Ben's show
was last night.
No wonder you're tired.
How was it?
Oh, it was great.
He did so great.
Uh, he says
you do that too.
You're supposed
to be pretty good.
He said that?
I didn't say that.
He said that?
I wouldn't say that.
- No.
- Can you do one?
No.
No, no, no, no.
- Come on.
- No.
- Oh, come on.
- No, no, no, no.
Peter, just do like,
just a little one.
No.
Nobody's here.
Please?
Come on.
(Peter)
I'm not--I'm not very good.
That's okay.
All right.
Are you familiar
with Russell Crowe,
the crazy guy,
throws phones at people?
- Yes.
- All right.
- I can't do him.
- Oh, come on!
I can't do him, but I got
a mean Popeye.
I got a mean Popeye.
Wow.
Oh, man, I gotta go soon.
Oh, wow.
Are you gonna be
on time this time?
I better, 'cause I'm surprised
they're letting me
do this again.
Everyone makes mistakes.
[laughing]
Yeah, that's true.
How many times have you
run out of gas?
It's like three or four.
Okay.
No, shut up.
Shut up, shut up,
shut up.
It's seven?
It was eight-ish.
- No.
- It was in the eights.
- No, it was, like, once.
- Well, who's keeping count?
[laughing]
[under her breath]
You.
What are you looking at?
(Peter)
It's the Bible.
Oh.
So you're religious?
Well, I'm a Christian.
Since when?
Like, a year--year?
Yeah, a year ago.
Mm-hmm.
So you, like, believe it, like,
you know, that it's all true?
Yeah.
Yeah, every word.
So do you believe gay people
should be stoned?
Of course not.
(Diana)
Well, your book says that.
No, no.
Actually, I was reading
yesterday in--
You know what?
I don't wanna offend you,
but I have a sister who's gay.
And you don't know the struggle
she's been through
from people who are telling her
that she's gonna go to hell
for, what, loving someone?
And you have the audacity
to tell me
that she's going to hell?
Go on, say it.
Oh, man.
Um--
I'm sorry.
I gotta go.
I gotta go.
I'm sorry.
(Diana)
"So do you believe gay people
should be stoned?"
Whoa!
(Peter)
Sorry, sorry, sorry!
Oh, hold it, hold it, hold it
hold it, hold it, ooh.
[laughing]
[giggling]
You two look happy.
Oh, we're getting
our application
for our marriage license.
Can you believe that
we're actually doing this?
(female)
I know.
Oh, did you call
the florist?
You know what,
we'll just go there next.
(female)
Okay.
(female #2)
I feel like there's
so much to do,
and it's gonna be here
before you know it.
(female)
I know.
That's a really
cool bag.
Are you a bike messenger?
Yeah, yeah.
So what's your message?
No, I'm a bike delivery person.
It's a--I don't deliver bikes.
I--um...
I guess, bike messenger
sounds better
than bike delivery person.
[elevator bell dings]
(Peter)
Stamps Armstrong.
Well, have a nice day.
(Peter)
Yeah, you too.
Stamps Armstrong.
[elevator creaking, clanging]
[grunting]
(male operator)
Hello, is there
a problem?
(Peter)
Yeah, I'm stuck
in the elevator.
The doors won't open.
I'm halfway down the floor.
(operator)
Okay, there's been
a malfunction.
Yeah.
(operator)
Try pressing the door
open button.
It's not working.
It's not doing anything.
It won't open.
I mean, the doors
are open but--slightly.
(operator)
Hang on, I'm entering a code.
Okay, now try pushing
the doors open.
All right, the doors are open.
Thanks.
(operator)
Okay, now I want you
to wait there
until the repair crew arrives.
Don't let anyone in.
What?
No, no, no.
I have to go.
I have to deliver a package.
(operator)
You don't understand.
Someone could die.
I'll figure something out.
I can't wait here, okay?
(operator)
Hey, this is serious.
You need to warn people.
You cannot leave.
Hey, can anybody help me?
Is there anybody here?
All right.
What's this?
Hey! You gotta stay and watch
this elevator for me.
If anybody gets
on this elevator,
they're gonna die.
So just stay here,
make sure nobody gets on.
I'll be right back.
I'll be right back.
(female)
I still can't believe that
we're getting married.
[laughing]
I never thought that I'd be
holding this application.
Oh, there's a caf down
on the second floor.
Let's just eat there.
And then the florist
isn't too far from here.
(female #2)
Sounds good.
(female)
What do you think your
brother is going to say?
(female #2)
I don't know, but he's going
to have to say something now.
[laughing]
[screaming]
Noooo!
Noooo!
Noooo!
[screaming]
[elevator crashing]
No, no!
Ah!
(male announcer)
Ray Comfort's been talking
with people on the street
about what they
believe for years.
He's not afraid to ask some
very personal questions,
and as a result, he gets some
very interesting answers.
Watch this.
(Ray Comfort)
I noticed when I came up,
you two were kissing in public.
You are obviously gay.
Do you think homosexuals should
be allowed to be married?
Definitely, 100%.
(Ray Comfort)
Are you two married?
Um, no, we're not married.
(Ray Comfort)
Are you thinking
of getting married?
Yes.
(Ray Comfort)
What do you think
of gay marriage?
I love gay marriage.
I have a lot of gay friends.
I love the gay community,
and I think everybody
should be able to love
who they wanna love,
no matter if you love a woman
or a man, who cares?
(Ray Comfort)
What do you think
of gay marriage?
I'm not opposed to it.
Gay marriage, I think
they should be able
to do whatever they want.
I think that everyone should be
free to marry who they want.
(Ray Comfort)
Do you think it's morally
okay to be gay?
Yes, it is.
It's not a lifestyle.
It's not a choice.
It's who you are.
You can't help the fact
that you love a man,
you can't help the fact
that you love a woman.
(Ray Comfort)
Do you think
it's morally okay?
Sure.
I think it is morally okay.
It's their choice.
They have the same rights
as everyone else.
Love is love.
Who cares who you love
as long as you're happy.
(Ray Comfort)
Are you gay?
I am.
(Ray Comfort)
Are you gay?
I am gay, yes.
(Ray Comfort)
You gay?
- Yes.
(Ray Comfort)
When did you discover
you were gay?
Last year.
(Ray Comfort)
Do you think people
are born gay?
No.
(Ray Comfort)
So it's--
they choose to be gay?
Yes, I think they
choose to be gay.
(Ray Comfort)
Are people born that way?
I believe so.
I was.
(Ray Comfort)
Do you think people
are born gay?
Yes, definitely.
(Ray Comfort)
Do you think people
are born with tendencies
to commit adultery?
Um, I don't--
No, I don't believe so.
(Ray Comfort)
What about to fornicate?
No.
(Ray Comfort)
I was born with
those tendencies.
Everyone's born with a desire
to do what we wanna do
even if, you know,
even if it's wrong.
I know adultery's wrong
and fornication's wrong,
but I still wanted to do it.
I was born like it.
Couldn't help it.
The desires overtook me.
But it doesn't make it right.
Does that make sense?
That does make sense.
(Ray Comfort)
I was born that way.
You were?
(Ray Comfort)
Yeah, right from the time
I was a little kid,
when I saw girls,
I wanted to be with one.
Most guys are like that, they
got red blood in their veins.
I mean, women are attractive.
Yeah, we are.
(Ray Comfort)
So we're kind of
born that way
in the sense we like to do
that which is wrong.
Fornicate and commit adultery,
comes naturally to us.
Does that make sense?
It does.
(Ray Comfort)
So do you think the same--it's
the same with homosexuality?
People are born with a nature
that does what they wanna do
rather than what God says?
Yes.
(Ray Comfort)
Do you think they're born
that way?
They're born that way.
(Ray Comfort)
You sure?
You think people are
born adulterers?
- Are born what?
- Adulterers.
Like, they cheat?
(Ray Comfort)
Yeah, wanting to cheat
on people.
It's in our human nature.
(Ray Comfort)
It's in our human nature?
Yeah.
(Ray Comfort)
You think people are
born fornicators?
[laughing]
Um...
(Ray Comfort)
What do you think?
Actually, it is choice.
It is choice.
(Ray Comfort)
Choice?
You've changed your mind?
Yeah, you just--yeah.
You enlightened me real fast.
Honestly, this is actually
a very good argument.
(Ray Comfort)
Does that make sense?
Yes.
- That makes sense, yeah.
- Sure, it makes sense.
(Ray Comfort)
Does that make sense?
Makes sense, yeah.
The way you're saying it,
logically, it makes sense.
(Diana)
You know, it was so inexpensive,
and it's the same as the one
we saw in the mall
the other day.
It looks so cute on you.
Thank you.
I gotta go.
I'll talk to you later.
(Peter)
That shirt looks
sooo cute on you.
(Diana)
Stop, you are such a creeper.
Huh-huh-huh.
[laughing]
Hey, this is gonna
sound strange.
Do you have a sister?
(Diana)
Mm-hmm.
Yeah, I do.
Is she gay?
No.
Why do you ask?
I had a dream last night.
(Diana)
About my sister?
She's married with kids.
I gotta ask you
another question too.
Okay.
What do you think
of gay marriage?
Well, I think that people
who love each other
should have the right
to get married.
Don't you?
I think there's more
to it than that.
I'm a Christian,
and the Bible--
The Bible says a lot
of stuff, though.
I mean, doesn't it say that God
sends gay people to hell?
You're missing
the point.
Jesus came to save
people from hell.
(Diana)
Don't get me wrong.
I believe in God.
It's just that my God
doesn't damn people to hell
just 'cause
they're different.
Let me show you something.
This is a Christian
talking to a gay couple.
(Diana)
I'd really rather not.
These people are
so condescending
and judgmental
and I just--
Why is the Bible
so against sex?
The Bible's not against sex.
The whole thing
starts with God
telling two naked people
to have sex.
They're literally
halfway home.
And I know there are
psychos out there
holding up hateful signs
about gay people,
but most Christians
aren't like that.
That's not even Christian.
Watch how it ends.
(Ray Comfort)
Anything else
you'd like to say?
- No, thank you.
- You finished?
Yep, I'm all good.
Thank you for being so, I guess,
kind and understanding
and not very
judgmental about it.
Fine.
(Ray Comfort)
Do you believe in God?
Yes, I believe in God.
(Ray Comfort)
What does God think
of homosexuality?
I think God is okay
with homosexuality.
(Ray Comfort)
So what does God think
of homosexuality?
That's a stupid question.
I think He should
just stay out of it.
(Ray Comfort)
Are you a spiritual person?
I am.
I believe in God.
(Ray Comfort)
Okay, so what does God
think of homosexuality?
He thinks it's a sin.
He thinks it's wrong.
He frowns upon it, but He still
loves me at the end of the day
since we're all sinners.
I know God wants people
to be happy.
Since I didn't choose
my sexual orientation,
so then why would He--
If He really didn't
like gay people,
why would He allow them to roam
around the earth so free?
(Ray Comfort)
Well, the same reason
He allows adulterers
and fornicators and liars
and thieves
to roam around the earth.
That's from the Christian Bible.
It's 1 Corinthians chapter 6,
verses 9 and 10.
Could you read it out loud?
It says, "Do not be deceived.
Neither fornicators,
nor idolaters, nor adulterers,
nor homosexuals, nor sodomites,
nor thieves will inherit
the kingdom of God."
(Ray Comfort)
What do you think
of that verse?
That one's really complicated.
(Ray Comfort)
It says, "Adulterers won't
inherit God's kingdom,
nor will fornicators,
nor will homosexuals."
So what do you think of that?
Um, it's a nice verse.
I'm glad you told that to me.
(Ray Comfort)
Could I give you
a Bible verse to read
and see what you think of it?
No.
(Ray Comfort)
Did you hear the second word?
It says, "idolaters."
Do you know what
that means?
I do not.
(Ray Comfort)
Well, an idolater
is somebody
who makes up a god
in their own image.
It's a violation of
the first and the second
of the Ten Commandments
where God says,
"Number one, you shall have
no other gods before Me."
And the Second Commandment says,
"Don't make yourself a graven
image," or a false god.
We tend to make a god up
in our minds
that we feel comfortable with,
a god that doesn't mind
adultery or fornication,
homosexuality, lying,
and stealing.
And we cuddle up to
that snuggly little god
we feel comfortable with,
but he's not the god
we have to face
on Judgment Day.
So according to the Bible,
will adulterers get into heaven?
No.
(Ray Comfort)
Fornicators?
No.
(Ray Comfort)
Homosexuals?
No.
(Ray Comfort)
That's the warning
of Scripture.
And if you don't receive
that warning,
then I can't do anything
for you.
I'm a Christian,
and I've got a dilemma.
If I say, "Homosexuals won't
inherit the kingdom of God,"
I'm called a hater, with
hate speech, and intolerant.
But if I say they will,
I'm lying as a Christian,
'cause I believe God's Word.
"Do not be deceived."
(Ray Comfort)
Why do you think it begins
with those words?
What do you think, Cody?
(Ray Comfort)
Why do you think the Bible
begins with those words,
"Don't be deceived"?
(male)
Do not be deceived.
I don't know.
(Ray Comfort)
'Cause people are deceived
when it comes to this issue.
Okay.
I accept Christ
into my heart,
and that's all that
I need to be able--
(Ray Comfort)
Well, no, you've got to repent,
turn from all sin.
No lying, stealing, adultery,
fornication, homosexuality.
You've gotta turn from all sin.
I can do that
on my deathbed
if I really don't believe
that I'll make it.
(Ray Comfort)
Will homosexuals inherit
the kingdom of God,
according to the Bible?
Absolutely not.
(Ray Comfort)
Thank you very much, ladies,
for talking to me.
I really appreciate it.
No worries.
(Ray Comfort)
If I care about homosexuals,
I'll warn them too.
Does that make sense?
- That makes sense, yeah.
- Sure, it makes sense.
(Ray Comfort)
Anything else
you'd like to say?
- No, thank you.
- You finished?
Yep, I'm all good.
Thank you for being so, I guess,
kind and understanding
and not very judgmental
about it.
Can I go back?
I accept Christ
into my heart.
They were Christians.
(Peter)
A lot of people make
professions of faith in Christ
and then they just continue to
live however they wanna live.
It's called self-deception
when we do that.
Hey, thanks for letting me
talk to you about this.
Yeah.
(Peter)
Oh, I gotta--oh, Ben
has a show tonight.
You should come
to the show.
Sure.
Um, before you go, I just have
a quick favor to ask.
My brother, Eric, has
really bad cancer.
He's dying and he has a wife
and three beautiful kids.
Why is this happening?
What did he do
to deserve this?
I'm so angry at God.
(Peter)
I'm really sorry that
that's happening to you.
I'll definitely
pray for you.
Thanks.
Hey, what do you think?
I think they make me look cool.
(female)
Cool?
You're trying on sunglasses
from a liquor store.
Cool is not possible.
You need to get in here?
No hurry.
You two together,
or do we have a line?
We're together.
(female)
Don't stare, but do you see
that guy standing over there?
I've been watching him
pace back and forth.
There's something really
weird about him.
Maybe he just needs
some sunglasses.
I'm serious.
I think he might have
stolen something.
You want anything?
(Ben)
I'm good.
I don't eat before a gig.
Butterflies.
You eat butterflies?
(Ben)
Yeah, I do.
[laughing]
(Peter)
Oh, I got a joke for you,
by the way.
- Yeah?
- Knock, knock.
- Really?
- Yeah.
Who's there?
Interrupting starfish.
Interrupting star--oh!
Come on.
[Peter laughs]
Do you get it?
- Yeah, I got it.
- It's a closer.
(Ben)
Right in the face.
How 'bout these?
Get on the floor now!
Get on the floor now!
Get down now, get down!
Everybody, get down.
Get on the ground.
You wanna be on the ground,
or underneath it?
Get down!
Are those cameras on?
Are they recording?
No, no.
Yes, yes.
- No, yes, which one?
- Yes, yes.
Give me the cash.
I need the cash now.
Nobody pays with
cash anymore.
Aghh!
(Ray Comfort)
We aren't calling for
the stoning of gays.
We aren't calling for
the stoning of anyone.
Think of the woman caught
in the act of adultery.
They wanted to stone her to
death, but she was repentant.
She put her trust in Jesus,
and He said,
"Go your way
and sin no more."
[cell phone dings]
[exhales]
God...
...if You can hear me,
please protect Peter.
Open the safe
or I open her skull.
(Peter)
No, no, no,
no, no, man.
(female)
No, please.
No, look, if you hurt her,
then you gotta answer to God.
(thief)
What?!
What are you, Mother Teresa?
Huh?
What, am I gonna go to hell?
Hey, just leave
her alone, man.
Just hand me the gun.
Yeah?
Yeah?
You want the gun?
You want the gun?
How about I give you
my bullets instead?
(Peter)
No, no, no, no, no.
And where are these two gonna go
if I pull the trigger, huh?
(Peter)
No, no.
Look, if you're gonna shoot
somebody, shoot me.
Oh God, I don't wanna die.
I don't wanna die.
Look, just don't shoot
anybody, okay?
Aghhh!
[police sirens wailing]
(thief)
No, no, no, this
isn't happening.
This isn't happening.
Who called 'em?
Did you call the cops?
No!
Get up, get up.
Get up.
Shut up.
Get down.
Get back.
All right.
All right.
- Get back, get back.
- Help.
Shut up!
Put your gun down.
Back off!
Put it down now,
and you will not get hurt.
(male)
Let her go.
(female)
Somebody help me.
(male)
It's not worth it, man.
Let her go.
(female)
Help!
Somebody help me.
[crying]
- Back off or I'll shoot her.
- Let her go!
She's gonna die, and it's
gonna be all your fault.
(male)
Sir, put your weapon
down now.
Put your weapon down.
Put it down now
and let her go.
No one will hurt you.
(thief)
Get back!
Get back!
I will shoot her.
(male)
Go, go, go, go!
Move in.
Move in.
Hurry up.
Grab the gun.
Stay on the ground.
Stay down.
Put your hands
behind your head.
Aghh.
Aghh-hah.
Thanks, man.
[cell phone dings]
Thank you.
(Ray Comfort)
So what about you?
If you were to die today,
where would you go?
Do you believe
in an afterlife?
Oh, man, I am the guy
that believes
in infinite possibilities.
(Ray Comfort)
Do you believe
in God's existence?
I don't really have a belief
in anything, to be honest.
(Ray Comfort)
Now, do you think
you're a good person?
Absolutely.
(Ray Comfort)
Do you think you're
a good person, Kyle?
Yes.
Whoa.
The way I judge myself, yeah.
I believe I am, yeah.
I'm a fabulous person.
(Ray Comfort)
Do you think you're
a good person?
Are you gonna
make it to heaven?
I am gonna
make it to heaven.
(Ray Comfort)
Do you think you'll go to heaven
or hell when you die?
If I don't repent
of my homosexuality,
I will most definitely
go to hell.
(Ray Comfort)
You said you were
a good person.
Let's go through some
of the Ten Commandments
and see how you do.
How many lies do you think
you've told in your whole life?
Heaps.
(Ray Comfort)
What about you?
Heaps.
I think I tell two lies a day.
(Ray Comfort)
Whoa!
Have you ever stolen
something in your whole life,
even if it's small,
irrespective of its value?
Yes.
(Ray Comfort)
Have you ever stolen something,
even if it's small?
Yes, I have.
(Ray Comfort)
Now, Jesus said, "If you look
at a woman and lust for her
you commit adultery
with her in your heart."
Have you ever looked
at a woman with lust?
I've done that probably
15 times on the way here.
(Ray Comfort)
Have you ever looked
at a woman with lust?
I'm gay, so I do not ever
look at women.
(Ray Comfort)
And what about you, Kyle?
Yes, I sure have.
(Ray Comfort)
At a guy?
Of course.
(Ray Comfort)
You ever used
God's name in vain?
Yes, I have.
(Ray Comfort)
Have you ever used
God's name in vain?
Yes.
(Ray Comfort)
Okay, that's called blasphemy.
Have you done it?
Well, yeah.
[laughing]
(Ray Comfort)
Now, have you ever
used God's name in vain?
Um--
(Ray Comfort)
"Oh my G-O-D."
Oh, yeah.
(Ray Comfort)
It's called blasphemy
when you do that.
So, a little bit
of bad news here.
I'm not judging you,
but by your own admission,
you're a lying thief
and a blasphemer.
And you have to face God
on Judgment Day.
So if you face God
on Judgment Day
and He judges you by
the Ten Commandments,
are you gonna be innocent
or guilty?
I'll be guilty.
(Ray Comfort)
If He judges you by
the Ten Commandments,
bearing in mind by
your own admission,
you're a lying thief
and a blasphemer,
would you be innocent or guilty?
Innocent.
(Ray Comfort)
Why?
Because I'm living my life
He want--
like, the way He wants me to.
I'm going to school.
I'm here.
I'm not on drugs.
I don't have a baby.
I'm not married.
I don't have sex every day.
I do, I admit it, I should have
waited 'til I got married,
but I was young and dumb
and I experienced it,
and it was a great experience
of my life.
(Ray Comfort)
Let's back up here.
You've just told me
you're a lying thief,
a blasphemer,
and a fornicator.
I am.
Yes.
(Ray Comfort)
And the Bible says fornicators
won't inherit God's kingdom,
neither will liars or thieves
or blasphemers.
So you're in big trouble
on Judgment Day.
And what about you?
I'll be guilty.
(Ray Comfort)
Would you go
to heaven or hell?
I would like to think
I'd go to heaven.
(Ray Comfort)
Well, the Bible says all liars
will have their part
in the lake of fire.
By my standings and where
I'm at right now,
I will be going to hell.
But I would love
to go to heaven.
I would hope that I wouldn't
end up in hell.
That sounds like
I'm going to hell.
(Ray Comfort)
Does that concern you?
Yeah, that would concern me.
Yeah, on some level, for sure.
(Ray Comfort)
Now, what can you do to be made
right with God?
How can you be justified?
How can you have
your sins forgiven?
Do you have any idea?
I go to church.
(Ray Comfort)
Well, that won't help.
You got to do something else.
I'm here at school.
I'm living my life.
(Ray Comfort)
Yeah, but so--
I'm here on earth.
He put me here for a reason.
(Ray Comfort)
But that doesn't wash
away your sins.
You need a Savior.
Someone who can wash away
your sins, so on Judgment Day,
you won't receive justice,
you'll receive mercy.
Because the Bible says
if you die in your sins
you'll end up in hell.
I'd hate that to happen to you.
Now, do you know what God
did for guilty sinners
so we wouldn't have
to go to hell?
Any idea?
Do you know what God did
so guilty sinners wouldn't
have to go to hell?
Any idea?
No.
No, what did He do?
(Ray Comfort)
Well, 2,000 years ago,
God became a human being,
Jesus of Nazareth, and He gave
His life on the cross
to take the punishment
for the sin of the world.
You and I violated God's law,
and Jesus paid our fine.
(male)
If I die, either way,
I'm gonna be dead.
(Ray Comfort)
Well, would you go--
are you sure about that?
Well, nobody knows for sure.
(Ray Comfort)
Well, God knows.
That's very true, but we
haven't spoken to God.
(Ray Comfort)
Well, He's spoken to us
through His Word.
The Bible says very clearly,
"It is appointed to man
once to die
and after this the judgment."
If you stand before God on
Judgment Day, in your sins,
you'd be guilty and you'd end up
in hell according to the Bible.
That's why you need the Savior.
That's why you need what
Christ did on the cross.
You've got to repent of all sin
and trust in Jesus alone.
If you're in court and someone
pays your fine,
the judge can dismiss your case.
He can say, "This person's
guilty, but they're out of here
because the fine's paid."
Well, God can let you
live forever.
He can commute
your death sentence
because of what Jesus did
on the cross.
Suffering and dying
for the sin of the world
and then rising from the dead.
If you're in a court of law
and you're guilty,
the judge can say,
"Oh, this person's guilty,
but the fine's paid,
so they're out of here."
God can let you live forever
because Jesus paid
your fine on the cross,
through His life's blood,
then He rose from the dead
and defeated death.
What you've gotta do is repent
and trust alone in Him.
Turn from sin and trust in Him.
It's like you trust a parachute.
When you jump out of a plane,
you don't try and save yourself
by flapping your arms.
You can't save yourself.
Same with God.
You've gotta trust
alone in Jesus;
don't try and save yourself.
That's what the Bible says.
Does that make sense?
It does.
(Ray Comfort)
And what you have to do
is repent and trust in Him.
The minute you do that,
God'll dismiss your case.
He'll forgive your sins
and legally grant you
everlasting life.
That's the good news
of the gospel.
Does that make sense?
Yes.
(Ray Comfort)
Okay, summation.
If you were to die today,
according to the Word of God,
and God gave you justice,
you'd end up in hell.
There are two things you
have to do to be saved.
You've gotta repent
and trust alone in Jesus.
When are you gonna do that?
Starting today.
(Ray Comfort)
In the quietness
of your heart,
don't wait 'til
you go to church,
today repent
and trust in Christ.
That's what I'm saying
so that you're assured
of your sins being forgiven.
Does that make sense?
It does.
I have a question for you.
Can you tell that
I'm a lesbian?
(Ray Comfort)
No.
No.
How would I tell that?
No, I'm just saying,
do we have, like, a--
do we look like
a certain way?
Can you tell?
'Cause you've been
talking to a lesbian
for the past 20 minutes.
(Ray Comfort)
I pray that God will lead me
to the right people
and He's led me to you
and it's--
He did.
I'm glad.
(Ray Comfort)
And it's been great
to talk to you.
Trust alone in Jesus.
He's the only Savior
that God has provided.
Does this make sense?
(male)
Totally makes sense.
(male)
Hey, Peter.
Hey, did you get done
with the police report yet?
Yeah, I just finished.
You almost took a bullet
for us in there,
and, well, we wanna
buy you dinner.
I mean, just to go our separate
ways seems kind of weird.
(Peter)
Thanks, but I gotta take
my buddy to his comedy show.
He's late.
Well, is it possible for you
to just drop him off
and then come with us
for a quick bite?
It'd mean a lot
to us, really.
All that crime fighting
has made me hungry.
Great.
Do you know where Tino's is?
It's right down
the street.
Sure, yeah, I could meet
you guys there, 45 minutes?
Cool.
All right, we'll see you then.
(male)
I still can't believe
you did that.
Can I get an iced tea please?
- Yeah.
- Thank you.
Why would you do that?
'Cause I like iced tea.
Seriously, though,
you don't even know us.
(male #2)
You tell that guy
to shoot you instead of us.
Yeah, that took
a lot of courage.
Actually, I was terrified.
But I'm a Christian, so I know
where I'll go when I die.
You're a Christian?
You know we're gay, right?
(Peter)
Yeah, I figured that when
I saw you guys holding hands
before the guy came
at you with his gun.
Yeah, but don't most Christians
pretty much hate gays?
(Peter)
No, that's not true.
We don't hate anyone.
Your table's ready.
Wonderful.
[exhales]
(male #2)
Well, this is a first.
I can't say we've
ever taken a Christian
out for dinner before.
You know, I actually have some
questions about the Bible
and what it says
about being gay.
Really?
That's weird.
I was just looking
into that.
Why?
Why would you do that?
(Peter)
I had this
crazy nightmare.
It left me thinking
that if I'm not true
to what the Bible says
about homosexuality,
it's like not warning people
about a faulty elevator
before they step onto it.
So if I really love people,
then I have to say something.
Love can't stay silent.
Okay.
Love.
Okay, so if God is love,
then why is there so much
suffering and death?
And if homosexuality
is such an abomination,
then why is the word
"abomination"
used to describe
eating shellfish?
And how come the word
"homosexuality" hasn't been
in the Bible until
a few decades ago?
Okay, one at a time.
So it is true that the word
"homosexuality" wasn't in there
because the word
hadn't been invented yet.
It was coined sometime
around 1900.
But the original Greek word
that was in there,
that's the exact equivalent
to the modern word
of "homosexuality."
I didn't know that.
Okay, what about
the shellfish?
(female)
That comes with baked potato
and glazed vegetables.
(male #2)
No, we're just
not ready to order yet.
(female)
Oh, okay.
No rush.
Could you give this
to Tino, please?
Look, here's something
that I've been reading.
One of these might
answer some questions
about why God allows suffering.
I think you'll find
both pretty useful.
(male #2)
Um, okay,
you know what?
I think we should go.
What?
We appreciate everything
you did, but we're done here.
(male)
What's your problem?
So he just gave us
some Christian stuff.
Let's go.
I'm not going anywhere.
What's your problem?
I'm not gonna sit here
and listen to this.
He saved our lives.
I really didn't mean
to offend you guys.
(male #2)
Oh, I know, I know.
You and every other homophobe
never mean to offend,
yet you still tell us that we're
going to hell unless we change,
and I've just
heard it all before
and I'm done listening.
(male)
Don't do this.
Listen, I am not going
back in the closet,
and I will not deny
my sexuality.
(male)
He didn't do anything.
(male #2)
It's fine.
Get converted.
See if I care.
Do not bring that
into our home.
(Peter)
I really didn't mean
to offend you guys.
(male)
No, you didn't do anything.
I mean, you can say
whatever you want.
I won't be offended.
No, but I understand
why he's mad.
I do.
Do you understand what
it's like to be in our shoes?
Do you have any clue, you know,
just the basic stuff
that we go through?
I know that this
is complicated,
and I don't wanna sound
like a know-it-all,
but you two saw what I was
willing to do for you today.
There are many other Christians
that would do the same thing
because they genuinely
care about you.
I don't doubt that about you,
I just--
(Peter)
The bottom line is that
I believe the Bible.
Even though I'm terrified to do
it, I have to speak the truth,
no matter what
people think of me.
It's not even about me.
It's about this
wonderful loving God
that sent His Son
to die on the cross
and rise from the dead
so that sinners
could be forgiven
and have everlasting life.
(female)
Okay, so what can I get
for you guys?
(male)
We're not ready.
But you're doing
a great job.
Here's a million dollars,
under the table.
[laughing]
Now I can quit.
More than just
some vain emotion
True love does what
others fail to do
You know that
I care about you
So I won't let
the world around us
tell me what to think
or say or do
You know it's true
So don't you know, love,
love can't stay silent
It's gotta wake the world
Oh, it's gotta
tell the truth
Oh, don't you know, love,
love can't stay silent
It's all that I can do
You know, I really love you
Love can't stay silent
(Ben)
I don't know how many people
know the Simpsons.
I've got the Homer Simpson GPS.
"You'll be driving along the 71,
we're going to take
the next exit on the left.
Wait, was it the left
or was it the right?
Hang on, think.
What are we gonna--doh!
I dunno.
Just stop here for some donuts.
Mmm, donuts.
Is there anything
they can't do?"
Who wants to come
for a drive with me?
They remade "Charlie
and the Chocolate Factory."
Johnny Depp got the role.
Robert De Niro was asked
to play the role of Willy Wonka.
Can you imagine?
Robert De Niro, Willy Wonka.
"Hey, listen to me, Charlie.
Hey, don't mess with me.
Hey, don't, don't mess--
don't mess with me.
You are good.
Yes, you--yes, you are--
yes, yes, you are.
You've gotta get--
yes, you do.
Yes, you do.
I am watching you."
Hey, thank you.
Hey.
Come on, y'all.
One more time,
give it up, come on.
[audience applauding]
All right.
[audience cheering]
Please, he wasn't that funny.
All right, consider this
a union gig.
We're gonna take
a 5-minute break.
If you're a government worker,
that's about an hour.
Everybody else, 5 minutes.
Go in back, get yourself an
overpriced, watered-down drink.
Five minutes, everybody.
Hey.
Oh, I'm so glad
you're okay.
Yeah, that was crazy,
wasn't it?
I can't believe
that happened to you.
Me neither.
I, uh, I actually prayed.
No, you didn't.
Yeah, I did.
I can't remember
the last time I did that.
Wow.
Well, thank you very much.
So I've been watching the videos
that you showed me,
like, all day today.
And I haven't told
anyone this yet,
but I'm kinda starting
to feel a little nervous
because it's starting
to all make sense.
(Peter)
Right.
You know, the whole thing
about heaven and hell and--
(Peter)
Right.
So you understand the gospel,
the main message of the Bible?
I think so.
We're sinners and Jesus
can save us?
Right.
Well, Jesus came to die on
the cross for sinners, yeah.
So when you turn away from sin
and you put your faith in Him,
then you're saved from
the punishment you deserve.
[cell phone ringing]
Oh, sorry, I have
to take this real quick.
Yeah.
Hey, Katie, what's going on?
(Katie on phone)
Eric isn't doing
good at all.
I need to take him to
the emergency room right now.
Can you watch the kids?
(Diana)
Yeah, of course.
I'm on my way.
(host)
Welcome back, everybody.
Thank you very much
for being here once again.
Can I tell you, you're a better
crowd than last night.
That's all I'm--
I don't wanna insinuate
that they weren't
very bright but--
flattery will get me
everywhere--
the crowd last night,
if the joke didn't begin
with "Knock, knock,"
it was a little rough.
I would like to introduce
our next act,
but apparently he's about
as punctual as Axl Rose.
We don't have a next act is
what I'm trying to tell you.
And I'm really not even kidding.
We, uh, we don't have
a next act.
What?
It's ridiculous.
(host)
Okay, so here's the deal.
I want my money back!
(host)
You can all be really mad,
start throwing stuff at me,
or we could keep
this party going
because we're like the NSA.
I happen to know that
there are some people
in this crowd tonight
who are actually funny.
In fact, the whole night
you've been looking up here
and going, "I could be
funnier than that guy."
[engine stalls]
Hi.
Yeah, um, I ran out of gas.
So now is your chance.
Where are our wise guys?
And just in case
you need to be bribed,
the food here, almost
better than airplane food.
We'll actually feed you
and your table
if you're willing
to come up here.
Where is our first funnyman?
[exhaling]
(voice on phone)
Hey, this is Peter.
Leave me a message.
I'll call you back.
Unless you're a telemarketer.
[beeping]
Hi, Peter.
It's Diana.
Um, sorry I had
to go earlier.
I just wanted to let you know
that I've really been thinking
about everything
we've been talking about,
and I've even been
feeling bad about my...
...sin.
[giggling]
Yeah, I said the word "sin."
Hey, uh, there's
a lot of you here.
You guys like impersonations?
Yeah.
All right, this
is Russell Crowe.
"Are you not entertained?"
[laughing]
[applauding]
And if you're not entertained,
I'll throw a phone at your face.
[audience applauding]
Abre la puerta!
Abre la puerta!
[gasps]
No!
Abre le!
Abre la puerta!
Abre la puerta!
Abre la puerta!
Abre la puerta!
[screaming]
[glass breaking]
Help!
[train horn blowing]
Rapido!
[vehicles crashing]
(voice on phone)
Hi, Peter.
It's Diana.
Sorry I had to go earlier.
I just wanted to let you know
that I've really been thinking
about everything we've been
talking about,
and I've even been
feeling bad about my...
...sin.
[Diana giggling]
Yeah, I said the word "sin."
Anyway, I've actually been
reading the Bible,
and it's really making me think.
But I'm not quite there yet.
I definitely have
some questions.
So as I've been reading,
I've noticed that God
often gives people
second chances,
and I like that because, oh,
I could use a second chance.
So I just wanted to say thanks.
I know I've been arguing
with you about God and stuff,
but you've been nice enough
to put up with me.
So, thank you for not
giving up on me.
You're a true friend.
(female news reporter)
A dramatic rescue happened
just hours ago
when a woman was almost
crushed by an oncoming train.
The rescue effort
almost turned tragic
when the victim refused
to be rescued.
I spoke with the hero's
cousin earlier.
(male)
My cousin said that when
the train was coming,
he was trying to get her
out of the car
but she just kept
screaming at him
and looking at him like
he was evil or something.
I mean, he had to break the car
window just to get her out.
She didn't understand
what he was trying to do.
I mean, she thought he
was trying to hurt her.
What she didn't realize is he
was actually trying to save her.
So there you have it,
a selfless act of courage
from an apparent enemy
who turned out to be a friend.