Bachchhan Paandey (2022) Movie Script

1
Load this box in the truck.
Where is everyone.
We can't find gun powder.
Cut!
Got it!
This is the last take
which is been playing right?
Sir, Myra's one-shot
idea is really working.
We'll manage to save 25 lakhs.
Sir, but have to be
the one to pitch this idea.
That director is a nutcase.
- You know--
- Verma!
Who is the director
on the bloody set?
You, sir of course.
- Myra was just rehearsing. And--
- Sir, I was just trying to help.
One minute.
Mr. Producer, what are
you paying me 25 crores for?
Why not give her 25,000
and let her make the movie?
It will make everyone's life easier.
Simple.
So you think you're a director, huh?
She?
You think you are Spielberg, huh?
Just after assisting in four movies?
Huh?
Wow!
- Your Highness!
- Sir, but I was just trying to help--
- Pack up!
- What?
Pack up!
And I mean both the shoot and you.
Okay?
I don't wanna be a part of all this.
Get out of my way!
She has ruined everything for us
Remove her.
- Excuse me, sir!
- Myra!
- Don't create a scene.
- I'm creating a scene?
Please leave.
Sir?
Papa, how many times do I have to tell
you to stop working as a spot boy?
You have me.
I'll make it work somehow.
I cannot see them
disrespecting you like this.
You know, why they don't respect me?
Because I never earned it.
They'll start respecting
me after you've earned your respect.
That's why you should
do what you want to do.
Don't back down no
matter what anyone says.
You know, like they say,
just go for it.
Myra just ruined the day.
So much mutton for the crew?
Crew will get lazy eating so much.
- Give this much only.
- Okay, I'll talk to Dipti.
- Sir?
- What?
We've got the GoPro camera
for close up shot of the tyre.
- Give it to the Demon.
- Yes, sir.
I don't want Myra ever on my set.
Is there anyone from spot team?
Myra? What now?
What the hell is your problem?
- Where's the Demon?
- Sir?
Director is in the vanity, sir.
- Thank God.
- Sir, sir.
You had said,
you'd give me a chance if I
come to you with an interesting story.
Sir, I have a fab story.
Lodha Katkar?
Not Katkar, it's Lodha Patkar.
But Lodha Patkar? Myra.
Who the hell is this woman?
Not a woman, sir. A man.
I just told you about him.
- Yeah, yeah whatever.
- He's a social activist, sir.
He was the president
of Save earth movement.
I have done a lot of
research on him and his life.
I really wanna make
a biopic on him, sir.
Enough Myra, my movie was about to
get shut because of you yesterday.
If you make a movie on
this Lodha Katkar-Chatkar,
I am sorry to say but after the release
I'll have to shut my business
and work as a spot boy
just like your father does.
Get real Myra.
Think of making
a commercial movie instead.
If you want to make a biopic
then make it on a gangster instead.
Now leave from here before
the director arrives.
So Myra, you'd asked me to
research on gangsters?
- Right.
- And I've got a few names.
Oh, that's great.
There is one, Zohar Jamshed.
- Okay.
- He's from Kashmir.
But I don't think you should
go for the terrorism angle.
Then there's one in the north.
Arjun Singh.
In his early days, he made a policeman
run for miles before killing him.
Now he is in jail, but he
doesn't want to come out at all.
Why?
He is scared of a gangster,
Bachchhan Paandey.
But forget about him.
There's one more.
- Maanav Panth!
- Hmm.
A notorious don.
You'll find more weapons in his house
than you'll find at the border.
But he was killed last month.
But I think he would
make an interesting subject.
- You can make a film about him.
- Sorry. Ma'am, who killed him?
The same guy, Bachchhan Paandey!
Bachchhan Paandey is the reason Arjun
Singh doesn't want to come out of jail.
He killed a notorious don
like Maanav Panth.
I don't think I'll find
a better subject than him.
I think I should
make a film about him.
- Where is he from?
- Don't be so stupid.
Forget about him.
He is not the right guy for you!
He's DANGEROUS! Too DANGEROUS!!!
Give me another week, I'll call you.
Keep the GST.
- But our money... 18% less.
- Hi, sir.
Myra, have I not made
my self clear to you.
I had to beg to get
him back to the set.
I cannot tell you
what all he made me do.
Sir, I have finally decided
on the subject of my biopic.
No, don't tell me.
Lodha Katkar, right?
No.
On him.
I've done my research.
Baghwa's Bachchhan Paandey!
What?!!
What's wrong?
You are from Uttar Pradesh, right?
Do you know who is
this Bachchhan Paandey?
Know him?
Ms. Myra, I breathed a sigh of relief when
I resigned from the police office in Baghwa
and joined sir's security team.
I know him quite well, sir.
Ms. Myra, he is devil.
DEVIL!
He has only one eye, but still
can see everything, everywhere.
He hates backstabbers
and ridiculers.
You know what he did
just last months ago?
Abhinav Tripathi!
I've had my eyes on you ever
since you wrote that article on me.
Good article.
The most notorious hit-man
of Baghwa - Bachchhan Paandey.
Bang on target.
Killed X people, thrashed Y people.
Your only mistake,
Mr. Blabbermouth you made a cartoon of me?
You think I fall in the category
of Scooby-doo, Mickey-mouse, and Doraemon?
My business runs on fear, mate.
And you...
You, go douse him
with the "Iraq water".
No sir! NO!!!!
- It was a mistake.
- Don't fret over this.
This is just a formality.
You are already dead.
This isn't working.
Go get the sickle from the car.
Bro? Bro?!
Not now, Virgin. Let me work.
Let me kill him.
- You want to kill him?
- Yes.
Grow a pair first.
Please, bro.
In spite of having a wife and a child,
everyone addresses me as Virgin.
That's because you're
yet to score your first kill.
Stop bugging me.
I'll lose my virginity
only if you give me a chance.
- Let us work.
- He's a noob.
- Learn how to hold a gun first.
- Please, just one chance.
- No, sir!
- Buzz off. Let us work.
- Please, bro. Please! Please, bro!
- Quiet!
No, sir...
No, no, no!
NO!!!
- Stop.
- No!!
And we have fire!
Tripathi, to maintain swag,
it is important to create fear.
- Catch!
- No! NO!!!!
'To maintain swag it is
important to create fear.'
'So you think you're a director, huh?'
'He is devil. DEVIL!'
'You should do what you want to do.'
'Just go for it.'
- Who's messaging you?
- Myra.
She has asked me
to book her ticket.
She is going to Baghwa.
Bachchhan Paandey.
Myra's message?
"This crazy one has started on a journey,"
"To search for him, with lots of love."
"This crazy one has started on a journey,"
Careful there!
"The address of his house,"
"O' air, please tell me."
That guy is getting beaten up so badly
Why are you just standing here
and watching it?
Then get me a chair.
I'll sit down and watch it.
He will die.
Someone call the police.
The one they are
hitting is the Police.
A Bottle of water, please.
Your change, maam.
Hey! My bag!
My bag!
Stop him!
Where is he?
Vishu?!
Are you mad?
You called me here all the way from
Gorakhpur to hit me with a brick?
That look on your
face was priceless.
- Why are you hitting me?
- You scared me!
What were you doing in
Gorakhpur in the first place?
I gave an audition in Mumbai
three months back.
Who do I have to run over, sir?
I was thinking...
Sorry sir, but he has
been waiting for an audition.
Can you do something
rustic like in Bihari?
Say action and I'll do it.
- Okay.
- Action.
Yo mister,
you think you are Mia Khalifa?
You are nothing but
Naalasupara's rejected supari,
Bhandup's beggar,
Mulund's Monkey man.
What, man!
I'll dip you in momo sauce and
I'll stuff your face with Banana.
What, man!
Banana will banana, Single is Alone,
Tired means tired, Dead is dead!
What, man?
You didn't use a single
Bihari word in your dialogue.
I used two, sir, what and man!
Sir? Who do I run over?
- Run over him.
- What do you think I am, a road?
What, man! Wow!
This is a school.
Where are you taking me?
This is where we are going to stay.
- What?
- Yes.
School's on summer break.
The peon who works
here is from Gorakhpur.
Shankar!
- How are you sir.
- What, man!
Are you serious?
Don't worry.
I've turned the classroom
into our temporary home.
Where do I keep my clothes?
In the refrigerator.
Refrigerator?
Trust me.
Go on.
What?
What is this?
What is this!
I am talking about
this little thing.
Oh, this?
This is a spy mike.
Fit is anywhere,
and you can hear everything by staying
within a radius of one kilometer.
This is deadly.
Listen Myra?
There's one thing
I don't understand.
What?
Why did you come
here to make your movie?
I came here because the gangster I want
to make a film on stays here, in Baghwa.
Oh.
Who's the lucky guy?
Bachchhan Paandey?
What?
You know him?
Pack your bags and leave.
What's wrong?
Are you crazy?
Have you lost your mind?
Do you even know who he is?
He is someone who undauntedly
smuggles red sandalwood.
He is a contract killer.
He is a dog! A scoundrel!
What are you doing?
Recording it.
- Give it here.
- Hey!
He is a scoundrel, a dog, a monster,
who speaks evil
about Bachchhan Paandey.
Bachchhan Paandey is god.
Bachchhan Paandey is messiah.
- For the poor--
- What are you saying?
- Have you lost your mind?
- I speak the truth.
If Bachchhan Paandey
got hold of recording,
he'd put a bullet in my head
and suck my blood out with a straw.
Do you get me?
Pack your bags and leave.
- It will be fine.
- Leave!
- Vishu?
- Get out of here.
- So, you are not with me in this?
- No.
- You won't even help me?
- No.
So you won't even act in my movie?
Isn't that what your
father always wanted?
Not that!
Krishnakant Mhatre.
My father struggled a lot.
He wanted to be a movie star.
The closest encounter was he got
to stand in the crowd in a movie.
You know what he
told me before he died?
What?
He said, "Vishu,
you should do what I couldn't do."
"Your name should appear
on the big screen in bold letters."
"Vishwakant Mhatre!"
But that's tough to achieve
in the small roles that I do.
Your name isn't displayed like that till
you don't play a hero or a second hero.
That's what I am offering you.
Don't stare at me.
Why else did I ask you to come here?
Who else can be the
second hero of my movie?
Vishu, it's always the second hero
who over powers the main hero.
- Like Salman in Kuch Kuch Hota Hai.
- Right.
- And Vicky Kaushal in Sanju?
- Right.
And remember Circuit
in Munnabhai MBBS?
Right!!
Not everyone has a
great personality like you.
- Come on!
- No, come on.
What are you thinking?
Your speaking the truth right?
Would I ever lie to you?
Fine.
Fine, let's make a movie...
on Bachchhan Paandey.
- Yeah?
- Done!
"Here comes... Bachchhan Paandey!"
"Here comes... Bachchhan Paandey!"
"Here comes... Bachchhan Paandey!"
"Here comes..."
"Bachchhan... Paandey!"
"Here comes..."
"Bachchhan... Paandey!"
"My trip is bad,"
"Gonna make you sad,"
"Gonna put you down,"
"Gonna gotta get in the ring thinga,
I'll knock you down."
"Remember, you'll breathe your last."
"Your jaw's gonna break,
ting ting ting tinga."
"it's game over for you."
"The animal inside me has gone savage."
"Act arrogant in front of me,
and you'll face some serious damage."
"You seemed to have
worked hard on your body."
"It means nothing in front of me, sonny."
"You thought you could fight me,
you are a fool."
"I don't think before I hit,
that's my rule."
"Thank your stars coz daddy's cool."
"I won't warn you again, bro"
"You'll be beaten up."
"You'll be beaten up."
"Once I'll start hitting, I swear,"
"You'll be dead."
"You'll be beaten up."
"You'll be beaten up."
"You'll be beaten up."
"I'm fire, you'll burn."
"Everyone brings an army."
"I am one man army."
"I outshine you on your best day."
"From UP to Bihar,"
"From Jungles to Mountains,"
"I rule everywhere."
"Repeat"
"Everyone brings an army."
"I am one man army."
"I outshine you on your best day."
"From UP to Bihar,"
"From Jungles to Mountains,"
"I rule everywhere."
"I am not brother,"
"I am known as Godfather."
"You'll be beaten up."
"You'll be beaten up."
"Once I'll start hitting, I swear,"
"You'll be dead."
"You'll be beaten up."
"You'll be beaten up."
"You'll be beaten up."
"I'm fire, you'll burn."
"Bachchhan... Paandey!"
"Bachchhan... Paandey!"
"Bachchhan... Paandey!"
"Bachchhan... Paandey!"
"Boom!"
"You'll be beaten up."
I came here as soon as I heard that
they've planned an attack on you.
No one can kill you.
Take care.
And get well soon.
Soiled my car.
Now watch me play, chucklehead.
Here I go.
Vishu!
How do I write a script without
knowing Paandey's backstory?
I need to know his story, his family,
and when he started all this.
Listen!
- What?
- Should we talk to him, directly?
Mind-blowing idea!
He is dying to talk to you.
Why don't you give him a call?
He'll come over.
Listen Doofus!
This is Bachchhan sir's car.
Make this spotless.
Make it shine.
What happened? A paralysis attack?
No, boss. Just a cramp.
Take vitamin supplements.
- Don't rest your back on my car.
- Okay. Okay, boss.
New here?
Huh?
Are you deaf?
No.
No.
Where are you from?
As in?
I asked you where are you from?
From Mumbai.
Clean my car properly!
Okay, sir.
They will clean it properly.
Blood stains doesn't look
good on it, right?
Are you calling me a murderer?
No.
I mean,
it could also be betel leaf stains.
Are you saying people
spit on my car?
No. I mean...
What are you doing?
The other day I saw
you on a truck with a gun.
You are a courageous man.
I mean, not everyone has
a great personality like you.
Listen up, girl.
Bachchhan Paandey doesn't
like such cheap behavior.
Keep talking and I'll
bury you right here.
No one in Mumbai will
be able to find you.
Boss, that guy who attacked on Laalji,
we tried to kill him,
but he refuses to die.
How many times do
I have to tell you, huh?
Always go for the jugular, always!
Your car is clean, sir.
So what do I do? Put it on my head?
Why did you have to talk to him?
You know he is crazy.
You know why they provide
a trunk at the back of a car?
To keep our bags.
But Bachchhan Paandey
uses it to keep dead bodies.
You know how serious this matter is!
One day, both you and I
will end up dead in that trunk.
Did you hear me?
- You are right.
- Right.
We cannot talk to him directly.
What was I thinking!
Finally, someone sees some sense.
How about if we approach
one of his lackeys?
Pack your bags and leave.
Buzz off!
If I wanted to leave, I would
have left on the first day itself.
I have come so far.
I cannot go back now, Vishu.
I am this close to it.
- You know how hard I've worked.
- Come on!
He is a bloody killer!
He is a gangster!
Of course, he's a killer.
He is doing his job.
And I am doing my job.
So why don't you do your job?
This is no logic.
What about Krishnakant Mhatre, huh?
Who is he?
- Your father?
- My father?
My father...
Fine.
Let's get to Bachchhan
Paandey's lackeys.
This is Kaandi.
Looks like he weighs only 3 kilos.
His strongest point?
His hammer hand.
His weakest point?
His family.
Kaandi goes to the temple
every Sunday with his family.
He's a total family man.
His weakness?
B-grade cheesy movies.
'This is Bufferiya uncle.'
'Bachchhan Paandey's on
of the most trustworthy guy.'
'He owns the Baghwa Kala Theater.'
- Listen Bhaaghi 3,
- Yes, sir?
- Clean the place properly.
- Okay, sir.
He loves to tell stories.
'You know why he's
got the name Bufferiya?'
- Mom, water.
- Quick, hand me over a drink.
Food is too spicy for Pari's taste.
What do you want?
Cold drink.
Or...
Water?
Cold drink.
Mirinda?
Or...
Maaza?
What do you suggest?
Mirinda or Maaza?
- Come here.
- What?
You...
'This is Pendulum.'
'A drunkard.'
But what really gives him
a high is his girlfriend Pinky.
Say it just once. I am drinking but
I am not getting any high from it.
'You know the tensest
part of his love story?'
'Pendulum as you know
works for Bachchhan Paandey.'
'Whereas Pinky's comes
from a family of cops.'
'Seven cops.'
'She has seven brothers
and all of them are cops.'
I love you.
'As soon as her seven brothers learned
about Pinky and Pedulum's affair,'
A!
'they fixed her wedding,'
B, C, D, E.
'with SP Suryakant Mishra.'
'After that,
all the cops held a big meeting,'
'because they knew Bachchhan Paandey
would surely gatecrash their wedding.'
'But SP Suryakant Mishra,
being overconfident said...'
Sir, Pinky has agreed to marry me.
You can ask her
brothers if you want.
But what if something goes wrong?
That would be a plus for us, sir.
We'll conduct a mass encounter on
Bachchhan Paandey and his gang then and there.
'And that day finally came.'
'Unfaithful Pinky's wedding.'
'The place was swarming
with police officers'
'and Bachchhan Paandey
decided to make an entrance.'
"She once belonged to me."
"Tomorrow she will
belong to someone else."
"She broke my heart. She just..."
"She once belonged to me."
"Tomorrow she will
belong to someone else."
"She broke my heart."
"She crushed it."
"She is a two-faced girl."
"She is a gold-digger."
"She is a two-faced girl."
"She is a gold-digger."
"She has left lover stranded."
"Everyone in one voice
- She's unfaithful."
"On the top of your voice
- She's unfaithful."
"I didn't hear you
- She's unfaithful."
"Everyone in one voice!"
"Everyone in one voice
- She's unfaithful."
"On the top of your voice
- She's unfaithful."
"I didn't hear you
- She's unfaithful."
"Everyone in one voice!"
"Everyone knows your name, baby."
"God alone knows how
many have ditched like this."
"Everyone knows your name, baby."
"God alone knows how
many have ditched like this."
"If you don't give
your hand in mine,"
"I will die as your wedding
takes place, you can bet on this."
"I will die as your wedding
takes place, you can bet on this."
"I am your lover,
let your father know that."
"Everyone in one voice
- She's unfaithful."
"On the top of your voice
- She's unfaithful."
"I didn't hear you
- She's unfaithful."
"Everyone in one voice!"
"Everyone in one voice
- She's unfaithful."
"On the top of your voice
- She's unfaithful."
"I didn't hear you
- She's unfaithful."
"Everyone in one voice!"
"Everyone in one voice
- She's unfaithful."
"On the top of your voice
- She's unfaithful."
"I didn't hear you
- She's unfaithful."
"Everyone in one voice!"
'The song had ended,'
'but the cops didn't know'
'that even a sheep can
roar in lion's company.'
'So these are the three monkeys,
'we'll have to stick around
to get all the information.'
- That's him?
- Hmm.
He's looking right at us.
I'll be right back.
- Okay.
- Go, go, go.
Be careful.
You'll certainly lose an eye if you
don't stop staring at us.
Buzz off!
There was a girl.
- There was... a girl.
- hmmm
There was a girl.
Hmm.
Her name?
Mamta?
- Myra?
- I'll tell you.
Sushmita?
- Let me finish.
- Let you finish?
You've been at it forever.
The weather, the year, and the government
will change before you'll finish!
You take so long, man.
Your sentences never end.
Vishu, control.
Control, control.
Your sentences never end.
Uncle, listen.
Please listen to me.
We've spent days with to
find out about Bachchhan Paandey.
Give us something, anything.
You have been here
for so many years.
A few weeks back,
a reporter too, was enquiring
about him just like you two are.
I see.
- Bachchhan?
- Bachchhan burnt him alive.
He had approached you?
Hmm.
How did Bachchhan
Paandey learn about this?
I told him.
One ticket for 'Sister-in-law's youth'.
It's so hot! Why have you
wrapped a shawl around yourself?
Going for a repeat, huh, Kaandi brother?
- Hey!
- Sorry.
It's so hot, mister. Why have
you wrapped a shawl around yourself?
Oh, this is local stuff.
Want to know my collection?
German.
Korean.
Russian.
Come here, you blabbermouth.
Let me check them out.
Go, get them.
How are you doing?
- Super!
- Superb?
- Yes.
- You look good, bro.
I had asked you to leave
those German movies on my bike?
Already did, like always.
There was a bag of vegetables.
I kept it between mint
leaves and coriander leaves.
- I see.
- Yes.
What's wrong?
Why have you gone so pale?
Hey?
- Out of my way!
- Be careful.
What's wrong?
Someone's in a hurry
to watch the movie.
Someone's very horny.
"My suffering heart sighed!"
"I was punished for falling in love.
What was my mistake?"
"I was ruined."
"I was ruined in your love."
"Love is great,"
"A moment of happiness."
"My suffering heart sighed!"
"I was punished for falling in love."
"What was my mistake? I was ruined."
"I was ruined in your love."
"In search of life..."
"I came so close to death."
You watch such low-grade
disgusting movies?
One never knows where
one's lust can take him.
- Damn!
- Tell me something, boss.
It is wrong to watch porn?
What is wrong if I want some
self-gratification in the cold weather?
I am not forcing anyone.
Hmm?
As a kid, you have to
face the stress of studies.
As an adult, you have
to face the stress of a wife.
You have to face the stress
of being roughed up by your enemy.
Given the circumstances, if
someone wants to move to a corner,
and relieve his stress in
five minutes, can't he even do that?
There is no happy
ending in a goon's life.
Pinky's calling.
You eat something.
No, boss. I am not hungry.
All the thrashing killed my hunger.
Forget everything, Kaandi and just smile.
Nothing.
We are just eating,
drinking, and having a good time.
Boss, boss!
It's Pinky.
- Say something.
- Come on!
Please, brother.
Say something at least.
I love you.
Damn it!
- You got an umbrella?
- No, sir.
"The glaze of her dangling earrings
Her hair intertwined with blossom"
"The glaze of her dangling earrings
Her hair intertwined with blossom"
"Every step of her walk so harmonious"
"That just looking at her
I knew I gave my heart away"
"That just looking at her
I knew I gave my heart away"
- Hello, sir.
- Hi.
I just cleaned the first one,
sir.
Okay.
Here.
The first toilet, sir.
Okay. Got it.
"The glaze of her dangling earrings
Her hair intertwined with blossom"
"Every step of her walk so harmonious"
"That just looking at her
I knew I gave my heart away"
Hey...
Whose artwork is this?
I killed Bachchhan Paandey, Boss.
Do you want to hear
me shoot him again?
Bachchhan looks quite
different now, Boss.
What is it?
Take him away.
Go on!
"Wind, O wind,
spread the fragrance."
"Tell me,
where does she let her hair down?"
"Tell me, where can I find her?"
"Please tell me."
"I want to meet her."
"Make me meet her once"
Did he answer the call?
I keep calling the
last dialed number, boss,
but no one is answering the call.
I am sure he works
for Rana Lohia boss.
No, a Punjab song's
playing as the ringtone.
Dark goggles suit you.
I think he is one of Balli's men, boss.
You work for Balli?
You are from Bhaurahi? Tell me!
Sit.
Yes.
I have got news for you.
The attack on you was done by one of our men,
there is a mole between us.
- Kill him.
- No no sir.
I'll tell you.
I am not interested.
Kill him.
Stuff this into his mouth.
We have been at it for three hours!
You didn't say a word.
Can I kill him, boss?
Please?
Shut that trap.
Please. Sir, please.
You are just an intern. Got it?
Let me score my first kill.
- Why are you irritating us?
- Zip it.
What score?
- Please. Sir, please.
- There you go.
Please boss.
Throw the dead body
in the backyard well.
Police! Police!
Pinky's unmarried widower is here.
Shut up.
Someone was found dead in the public
toilet behind Narayani Cinema.
I learned that you were there?
Get him a cup of tea.
Get one tea.
It won't just be an
investigation this time.
Know that.
Such disrespect?
I am giving you respect,
don't I deserve some in return?
Cancel the tea.
Cancel the tea.
Department suspects
that the killer is with you.
I just killed him.
He's sitting on that swing
over there and watching television.
Turn around and have a look.
- Good one, boss.
- Look. Look.
I will wait,
for you to make one mistake.
Then you will see,
how I conduct a mass
encounter of you and your men.
Look.
This wood factory is just a front.
Remember I told you about
the smuggling of red sandalwood?
Yes, I remember.
That and all the bloodshed and
gross stuff also take place here.
Then why did you stop the bike here?
Let's go take a closer look.
Let me repeat.
All the bloodshed and gross
stuff also take place here.
Let me repeat myself as well.
Let's go take a closer look.
- Come on.
- Damn it!
Go slow, I am shooting.
Good, you keeping shooting,
if we are caught he will shoot us.
Keep your phone down.
Oh no.
Oh!
Shit!
A dead-end?
For both, the road as well as us.
He is still standing there.
Be casual, don't panic.
I told you, you took the wrong turn.
- Right. I should always listen to you.
- Hey!
- Hmm?
- Hey, wassup!
Where are you guys going?
- To a friend's place.
- To my aunt's place.
Her friend...
I'm friends with her aunt.
Her aunt is my friend.
My aunt is his friend.
Where does she stay?
- Right...
- Left...
- And then straight.
- Straight ahead.
- Can we go?
- Sorry.
Sorry, sorry.
I've seen them before.
At Bela Bar.
Bela Bar?
He is the guy who
had given me that CD.
You always wanted a solo job right?
Yes, bro.
I have a job for you.
Follow them and get
me all the information.
Copy that, bro.
You've got this all wrong,
Virgin-brother.
This is the first time
I have seen this girl.
I have nothing to do with her.
I am a student.
I came here to learn...
Awadhi language.
Awadhi?
Hmm.
Then say something in Awadhi.
What, man!
What?
Zip it.
- Ladies, your turn.
- Yes?
What man?
What man?! What is this nonsense?
What brings you here?
Well, I am a photographer.
I came here to click pictures
of nature, rivers, and mountains.
Here?
I see.
Show me what you have clicked.
Sure.
It's on my camera.
- I'll go get it.
- Get it.
Yo meatball, get me water.
Yes, sir.
We are in trouble.
- It's not called trouble.
- I know.
I don't want to say
it in front of you.
This isn't a funfair.
Why are you clicking his pictures?
- Hang on a second.
- There you go.
Why did you click my pictures?
Give me the reel.
Sorry, but you are so photogenic
and the light was just perfect.
I couldn't stop myself.
Have a look.
Wow, so handsome.
Right?
You should have been a hero.
Hmm.
I mean not everyone has
a great personality like you.
Yes.
"Aslam-brother!"
"Aslam-brother!"
"Aslam-brother!"
"Goggles from Dubai, undies from China,"
"look at you,
sipping Irani chai."
"Aslam-brother!"
Virgin-brother, could you
move towards the left a little?
A little more.
Go, go, go.
A little more towards your left.
A little more.
Perfect!
Mind-blowing clicks.
You look awesome.
Just like Maya in the
movie Shootout at Lokhandwala.
Like Sultan Mirza in
the movie Once Upon A Time.
Like Raghu in the movie Vastav.
Well, I got into this
profession for a reason.
- Correct.
- By the way,
Bachchhan Paandey must have worked
very hard to be where he is now.
You don't call that hard work,
you call that murder.
I too want to make money like
Bachchhan sir, in fast-forward mode.
Hmm.
But I got married, had a daughter.
Then I had to think about them as well.
Hmm.
My wife,
Smita, and my daughter, Pari.
By the ways,
does Bachchhanji have a wife? Kids?
A girlfriend? Or a love story?
I am sure he must have one at least.
According to the sources,
Bachchhan sir once had a whirlwind romance.
Her name: Sophie.
Sophie?
Sophie.
Then?
They had an argument one day,
and Bachchhan sir killed her.
Hello?
Yes, sir.
Okay, sir.
I'll be right there.
There you go.
Speak of the devil
and Bachchhan Paandey calls.
He has a long life.
Hmm.
There is going to
be a big killing tonight.
He's asked me to be there.
I'll get going.
- You don't want your pictures?
- My pictures?
I'll transfer them to your phone.
Smita will love them.
Copy that.
Are you enjoying his company or what?
- He was leaving.
- Quiet.
I'm placing the
spy mike in his phone
so that we can hear whatever
he does with Bachchhan
if we stay within its
radius of one kilometer.
How's that?
He killed his girlfriend.
You cannot even imagine
what he'll do to us.
Check, check.
- Virgin?
- Yes?
Copy that, done.
Thanks.
Thank you.
Let me know Smita's
reaction to these pictures.
Okay, done.
- I'll get going.
- Okay. Bye.
Vishu, I have a strong gut feeling,
I am going to get a great
scene for my script today.
There he is.
Come here, Virgin.
You always wanted to witness
a big showdown, didn't you?
Yes, bro.
Today you'll get to witness a
showdown that'll blow your mind out!
Just wait till boss's
meeting with Laalji ends.
Who's funeral is
scheduled for today, bro?
Rana Lohia!
Rana Lohia?
- Bachchhan's rival?
- Right. The same guy.
Bachchhan has found out that
Rana Lohia was behind that attack.
And I just found out that
Rana Lohia is having an affair
with a girl in the SS colony.
He goes there every
Saturday to meet her without any security.
- But this time he ain't going...
- Back!
What is the plan?
The plan? We have already
placed three men at her place.
Jumbo has punctured his car's tires.
You go and refuel
Bachchhan sir's car.
- Go.
- Okay, bro.
He is going to leave.
Let's go, let's go, let's go.
Let's go.
Stop. Stop.
Why did he stop here?
- Yes, Virgin?
- Ranaji?
Bachchhan is planning
to kill you tonight.
He will be there in half an hour.
He is talking to Rana Lohia.
What connection
does he have with him?
You are at SS Colony, right?
There are three boys outside,
keeping a watch on you.
They have punctured
the tires of your car well.
Someone's guarding
the back road as well.
So you can't take that route either.
He leaked the entire plan!
Sir, you do one thing.
Keep the lights on
and get out of there.
You only have 15 minutes.
Virgin is double-crossing them.
- He is leaving.
- Go, go, go.
Brain and nerves of semi-coma
patients like him remain active,
but we can never say when
they will regain consciousness.
That's Bachchhan's car.
He is coming this way.
Let's leave through this lane.
I've lost the signal.
- It's back.
- That's the house.
Here.
Check in there.
Some of you go upstairs and check.
In there!
Go find him!
Find him!
Two of you go in there.
Rana got away, sir.
Rana ran away.
We were watching this place.
We didn't see anyone leave.
Expect for an ambulance.
Did you check it?
No, I thought there
must have been an emergency.
Rana is a genius.
He managed to leave from
right under Bachchhan's nose.
Heed my advice. Drop the
idea of making a movie on Bachchhan.
Make a movie on Rana instead
with me as your lead hero.
Keep quiet.
Let me hear what he is saying.
That bloody Rana Lohia
managed to bluff us and get away.
He managed to bluff
Bachchhan Paandey and get away.
What say, Virgin? What do you think?
Yes, sir.
Why are they laughing?
Come here, come here, come here.
- Go on.
- Someone give him a stool.
Sit.
Sit down.
How far do you think
Rana must have reached by now?
Boss,
we can still catch that ambulance.
I know that, kiddo.
Come to the point.
We didn't plan this
to get to Rana Lohia.
We planned this to get to you,
smartypants.
- I'll be damned!
- They planned this to trap Virgin?
Who's the genius now?
Even my stone-eye was
keeping an eye on you.
Bufferiya had already warned me that
we have a mole in our gang.
I wondered who could it be.
I looked around and my
eyes narrowed down to you.
Even with a meager salary of 40,000
you manage to celebrate your
daughter's birthday in a five-star hotel.
Right.
You wear branded clothes and shoes.
Kalidas, huh?
And his watch?
Lado!
Remember when you asked us to stuff
a cloth into the Public toilet killer?
He just jumped at that opportunity!
Please forgive me sir.
Boss...
- As they say, one bad apple can spoil the bunch.
- Please, sir. Please forgive me.
- Please forgive me, boss.
- Sir! Sir! Look!
I found Rana!
They managed to get Rana as well!
Please, boss.
Bachchhan, I had planted
Virgin to protect myself.
- I didn't plan to--
- Kill me?
Is that what you want to say?
Hmm?
You are dying to get
rid of your virginity, right?
Sir, please.
It was a mistake.
Please forgive me.
- Here.
- Boss.
Kill him.
- Virgin?
- Get rid of your virginity.
- Please, boss.
- Kill him.
- Shoot, kiddo.
- Boss, please.
- Shoot him.
- How, sir...
- Be the first one to kill!
- Boss!
- Come on! Shoot!
- Boss!
SHOOT HIM!!!
Rana's dead.
The traitor is dead.
He killed Virgin as well.
Oh God, Vishu, not even a writer can
come up with such a brilliant scene.
What is this device in his phone,
boss?
What is that?
Pick it up.
What is it?
It's a mike, boss.
Rana must have planted it there.
No, give it to me.
No, Rana didn't plant this.
If he had planted it,
he would have already gotten
all the information through Virgin.
They are talking about us.
Cops and media personnel
use this kind of device.
It is a close-range device, boss.
This means there is someone
close by, listening everything.
I'd told you! I'd told you so!
Let's get out of here, now!
Hey...
Listen carefully, whoever you are.
You have dared to
spy on Bachchhan Paandey.
I will get you.
I will get and then let go...
I will let go of the trigger
and you will let go of your life.
Shit! Shit! Let's go!
Pack everything, quick!
- Everything! My hard drive?
- You never listen to me!
He will kill us, Vishu!
Stop crying! I've been warning
you ever since you came here.
These people are crazy.
- Here. Take this as well.
- Enough now!
- Where is my hard drive?
- To hell with the hard drive!
What is this? What is this?
Put it in the bag!
Let's go, let's go, let's go!
Get the bag!
- Hurry up!
- Let's go, hurry!
Run!
Shit!
NO!!!
"If I knew, falling in love hurts so bad,"
"I'd tell the entire town,
not to fall in love."
"If I knew, falling in love hurts so bad,"
"I'd tell the entire town,
not to fall in love."
"If I knew, falling in love hurts so bad,"
"I'd tell the entire town,
not to fall in love."
Good thing you didn't killed them.
We first need to find out whether they
are working for cops or our enemies.
It is not what it looks like.
Please.
Who they work for doesn't matter.
They are anyway bound to die.
"My eyes are tired in search for you"
"I keep remembering you everytime"
"My mind is always sad remembering you,
when will it get better for me"
I just came here to make
a movie based on your life!
What did you say?
I just came here to make
a movie based on your life.
- She is telling the truth.
- The truth.
A movie based on my life?
Yes. That's why we kept
following you and your men.
We had no hidden agenda behind it.
An autobiographical movie about me?
- Yes.
- Yes.
The vicissitudes of
fortune leads us to hope.
When one door closes, another opens.
That's it?
It's over already?
What was this? A Tiktok video?
No, a short film. A short duration film.
- A short duration film?
- Yes.
A tall girl made a short film?
You plan to make a short
film about me as well?
No, I will make a proper feature film.
Two and half hours long.
A full film.
Like Scarface, Goodfellas, you know?
- What's that?
- Hmm?
Like Satya,
Sarkar, Gangs of Wassepur.
- Bachchhan Paandey in those lines.
- Yes, in those lines.
You should have
asked me about myself.
I would have told you everything.
Why opt for this
"hide and seek" game?
I heard that you set
a journalist on fire.
That idiot had made a cartoon of me.
People had stopped fearing me.
I want you to make
a good movie about me.
I want people to go
back to fear me again.
- What say, boys?
- Well said, Boss.
How does that saying go?
Monday to Sunday,
Fear...
Bachchhan Paandey!
Can we start the interview?
And...
Ready?
Bachchhanji,
let's skip those glasses?
Let's keep it natural, huh?
Please?
Right.
Good.
And action!
My father was suffering from cancer,
the last stage,
and the pharmacy guy refused to give
me the medicines if I didn't pay,
so I had no option left
but to resort to violence.
My sister's in-laws forcefully
hanged her to death,
so I had no option left
but to resort to violence.
They cut off my little brother's limbs
and made him beg on the streets,
so I had no option left
but to resort to violence.
There is no reason behind it at all.
So no sob story in my case.
I just want to do something daring.
Killing people gave me pleasure.
The more people I killed,
the more pleasure I got.
Um, what about your
near and dear ones?
I mean, your family,
someone you call your own?
There she is, my mother.
The news of my killings
reached her eventually.
Neighbors started talking,
police started questioning.
I could not stop
everyone from talking.
So, my mother stopped talking to me.
She hasn't spoken
to me for 10 years now.
She hasn't said a single word to me.
I am dying to hear her voice.
Any other questions?
Yes.
How many people have
you killed so far?
I mean... Approximately?
What's the count?
Your's 38, Boss.
No, you had stabbed
four boys in Degha.
Right, right.
42 kills for you.
8 for me.
That's 50.
- What's your count, Kaandi?
- 10.
- That makes it 60.
- Yours?
What about you two?
One each.
Shame on you guys.
70 in total, Boss.
It would have been 72
if we had killed them as well.
His name is Bullet.
He has 31 scars on his body.
From fight wounds, stab wounds, and
bullet wounds. 31 scars in total.
We can see 30 right now.
Where's the 31st one?
Show it.
Come on, brother.
Come on, don't feel shy.
Oh shit!
- Hold it.
- No, no, no!
- How about you, madam?
- Try it. Use it.
- Mummy! Mummy!
- Try it. It is fun.
It is really fun.
I turned classroom into a house
and you guys made it a torture chamber.
No...
Wait!
The battery's dead.
- What?
- Sorry.
So he keeps hanging upside
down till she charges the battery?
He will die.
So what?
We'll just stuff his body in a bag full
of salt and dump him in the lake.
It will melt his bones as well.
Guys, ready.
What have I gotten myself into?
Five empty chambers and
one loaded with a bullet.
Excuse me, but this is
no way to threaten someone.
Watch me.
You get five chances
to live and one chance to die.
- Try.
- You get... five chances to lives,
- and one chance to die.
- and one chance to die.
- Shit!
- What the hell!
- What have you done!
- Have you lost your mind?
- Bachchhan Boss told us not to kill him.
- He is dead!
- We were only supposed to threaten him.
- Run!
What will I tell
Bachchhan Boss, huh?
Boss held Salim Chamda by
his neck, slowly took his blade out
and swiftly moved
it across his neck.
His blood splattered on everything
in a radius of three feet.
- Damn!
- Three feet?
You're going overboard now.
Three feet, really?
Did he use a water gun to do that?
Next, you'll claim that if
Bachchhan spits on a wall, it breaks.
That isn't possible.
You don't believe me...
- No, I do.
- If you don't believe me...
- No, I believe you.
- Do you want me to demonstrate?
- No, no, no.
- No, no, no!
- He is just kidding.
- I believe you. - Watch watch...
- No, no, no. - Watch watch...
- Bachchhanji, please!
- No, no, no!
- It's done! It's done!
Help!
I am alive. I am still alive.
I wonder sometime that my father
wants me to be an actor
or does he wants me to join him up there?
Blood! Blood! Blood!
It's just ketchup.
You have lost your mind.
Ketchup.
Don't worry.
You won't get such
nightmares anymore, because...
I have completed my script.
- Oh, God.
- It is a mind-blowing script, Vishu.
All the characters
in it are amazing.
Everyone will get an award for it.
I am so happy.
'You won't help me making my film?'
'No.'
'So you won't even act in my movie?'
'Isn't that what your
father always dreamt off?'
Where's my entry scene?
Am I not a part of the movie?
One scene?
Just two scenes in the entire movie?
'You are speaking the truth right?'
'Would I ever lie to you?'
Shit!
Boss wants to meet both of you.
Ms. Myra, tell us,
who will play the lead role?
Let me tell you!
There is just one person
fit for this! Sanjay Dutt!
The perfect villain.
No!
Shah Rukh Khan, the Don!
You tell us.
You are from Mumbai, right?
This movie is based
on Bachchhan Paandey,
so I think he should be
the one to play the lead role.
You are joking, right?
Have you lost your mind?
Are you making fun of Bachchhan sir?
I am not making fun of him.
In fact,
all of you are making fun of him.
Who knows Bachchhan Paandey's
story better than him, huh?
Isn't it obvious that
he should be the hero in it?
Bachchhan, as a hero! Bachchhan Paandey.
Stop it!
What's so funny, huh?
- What did you say?
- I mean,
everyone knows Sanjay
Dutt and Shah Rukh Khan.
But no one knows Bachchhan Paandey.
If Bachchhan Paandey
portrays Bachchhan Paandey,
then everyone in the
world will know of him.
People will fear Bachchhan
Paandey even more.
You could join
politics in the future.
You could do anything after that.
I think Bachchhan Paandey's role
should be played by Bachchhan Paandey.
Right, Myra?
Myra is a very honest director.
She never reduces anyone's role.
Right?
What say?
Hmm.
I never thought of that.
Listen director?
Have another drink.
You found yourself
the hero of your film.
Don't take him seriously.
He is sloshed.
You need to know
acting to be a hero.
It is not child's play.
That's what I just said.
This is not a child's play,
this is Bachchhan's playground.
What are you saying?
This is not done.
Hey, Ms. Know-It-All! You spent a few days
with us and you stopped fearing us, huh?
Get this straight, girl,
I film,
I hero.
Okay?
Okay.
Music!
Myra? Myra?!
Who goes first? You or me?
- Sorry.
- Sorry.
Found the scoundrels.
They were running away! Cowards!
Look...
No, no, no.
We aren't here to stop you.
Don't be mistaken.
But you, get this straight.
Bachchhan doesn't need you.
Do whatever you want.
It won't make any difference to him.
Let's go, Kaandi.
- This girl spells doom anyway.
- Wait.
I want to have a word with them.
You two are leaving because you think
Bachchhan sir cannot be the hero of your film?
Bachchhan sir was,
is, and will always be our hero,
because of the story
you are not even aware of.
Drop it. Don't blabber.
- Let's go from here.
- What story are you talking about, huh?
His love story?
I know everything.
Virgin had told me everything,
how your 'Hero' murdered
his own girlfriend.
You know nothing.
I know everything,
because I was with him back then.
'Some years ago, Bachchhan Bhaiya
used to work for Laalji Bhagat.'
'He was given a contract by a politician,'
'to kidnap a local reporter.'
There was just one person fit to do
such kinds of jobs for Laalji Bhagat.
Three glasses of juice, please.
We are about to fight.
When will the fight happened?
When you will ask for money.
Ouch!
What!
Hey, you couldn't help me?
What you staring at?
You know what! Stop smoking!
Ms. Sophie!
Ms. Sophie!
I've fulfilled one
wish from your bucket list.
- Thank you!
- You did well.
Hey!
How about fulfilling
my wish as well, huh?
Don't look over there.
They are rowdy hooligans.
It's okay.
Let's go fulfill the next wish.
You here for that girl?
You don't know me?
You are making a big mistake, bro.
Don't you know both foreigners
and perfumes have a short shelf life.
So, you don't lose
your heart to them.
You just enjoy them
as long as it lasts.
Hey!
- You want us to beat him up, brother?
- Don't bother. He's nobody.
That crazy man...
Hi.
Thank you.
Thank you very much.
Mister?
Bachchhan Paandey.
Bachchhan Paandey.
It's nice to meet you.
Yes, yes.
Oh wait, let me try this in Hindi.
It's a pleasure to fight me.
Not fight,
it's a pleasure to meet you.
Oh yeah!
Fight...
- Fight you.
- Meaty.
- Meet you.
- Okay.
Alright.
See you.
Bye.
What is it, brother?
Nothing.
She makes me want to do something.
What does she make
you want to do, brother?
The titanic pose.
The one they did inside the car?
Not the one they did
inside the car, doofus.
The one where they
spread their arms wide.
How much for these?
Two for five bucks.
You are selling lifeless and
flaccid at such a high rate?
They are meant to be
enjoyed as food, bonehead.
Brother, the reporter
is standing right behind you.
As you can see,
the fair has had a splendid beginning.
People from far and
wide have come to attend it.
Who's up? Start again...
As you can see,
the fair has had a splendid beginning.
- Hey you, what the hell?
- Weren't we supposed to kidnap him?
Program change.
- Yes, I will be there.
- Let's go.
Where did I go wrong?
Oh.
Hello?
Guleria?
Guleria has contracted
malaria, madam.
- What?
- This is his doctor speaking.
Guleria said that he's
sending you another guide.
Another guide?
Who?
- Bachchhan Paandey?
- Yes, your new cicerone.
- Cicerone?
- Yes. Guide. Let's go.
Let's go, let's go, let's go.
Okay, that's great, Bachchhan,
but how are you gonna
help me with my bucket list?
I really need to
fulfill all my wishes.
What are they so important?
This is where my parents met for the first time,
the great Pushkar fair of Rajasthan.
Okay?
Mom was from London,
Dad was a local.
They fell in love.
They fell in love.
Smart, Bachchhan.
Okay, now listen
to me very carefully.
Listen carefully.
I just wanna very thing that they did.
All the crazy, lovely things in Rajasthan
that made them fall in love.
Like tightrope walking,
parasailing.
You too want to fall in love?
Huh?
Nothing.
Come with me and I'll
fulfill all your wishes.
Just keep telling them to me,
one by one.
- Okay.
- Okay? Let's go.
Thanks.
- They are camels?
- No, they are donkeys.
How much more will you make me walk?
I have been walking
for three days now.
"You can let go of
my hand a million times."
"You can break my
heart a million times."
"But I will never leave you."
"You have the right,"
"To look away from me."
"My eyes don't have that right."
"You are the only one I care about."
"The rest of the world
can go to hell, for all I care."
"I just seek your company."
"I don't care how this world works."
"Be my Juliet."
"I want to be your Romeo."
"I just seek your company."
"I don't care how this world works."
"Be my Juliet."
"I want to be your Romeo."
"I have a right over both,
your anger and your love."
"I will give you my life and not just give
my heart, all you need to do is just ask."
"I already have everything."
"But if I can have you,"
"I can ignore not the
world but God as well."
"This life will have no meaning
if I have to live without you."
"I just seek your company."
"I don't care how this world works."
"Be my Juliet."
"I want to be your Romeo."
"I just seek your company."
"I don't care how this world works."
"Be my Juliet."
"I want to be your Romeo."
"Be my Juliet."
"I want to be your Romeo."
"You can let go of
my hand a million times."
"You can break my
heart a million times."
"But I will never leave you."
Laaji sir,
I have been your slave for 32 years.
I have fulfilled all your wishes.
Now I have a wish
that I want to fulfill.
I want to be free.
I am done breaking bones.
Now I want to form a relationship.
I am done buying arms
and ammunition for you.
Now I want to buy
groceries for my wife.
I have lived like an animal so far.
Now I want to live as a human being.
Wow!
What makes Bachchhan
happy makes Laalji happy.
Thank you. Thank you so much.
Just tell me when
you want to get married.
- Go, go, go.
- "I just seek your company."
- Enjoy your life.
- "I don't care how this world works." - Thank you.
"Be my Juliet."
"I want to be your Romeo."
"I just seek your company."
"I don't care how this world works."
"Be my Juliet."
- "I want to be your Romeo."
- Hello?
I want to share something with you.
Can we meet?
I also want to show you something.
Can we meet where we
met for the first time?
But the fair is
closed for the night.
Zip it, blabbermouth.
Don't be such a dufus.
You want me to find
your mother another husband?
I've asked you to
meet me at the fair
because I know no one will be there,
you bonehead.
OH, MY GOD!!!
Well said!
I understand what you are saying!
Oh, smart Bachchhan.
"I want you to be my destiny."
"My crazy heart is being stubborn."
"It wants to make you mine."
"I worship you."
"You are my god."
"If you'll accept me,"
"I'll always thank you."
"On my heart I engraved,"
"Just your name."
"I just seek your company."
"I don't care how this world works."
"Be my Juliet."
"I want to be your Romeo."
"I just seek your company."
"I don't care--"
Sophie!
Please, stop it!
Bachchhan!
Bachchhan!
Stop!
Bachchhan!
Bachchhan! Please stop!
Sophie!
Bachchhan...
Bachchhan, no...
Bachchhan sir wasn't
always like this.
After Sophie's death,
his eye and his heart both are of stone.
But he still feels for his people.
He has emotions.
Otherwise,
he wouldn't get me married to Pinky.
He knows what is love.
And he knows what its true worth is.
That's why he is our hero.
Got it... Director?
Now quietly leave for Mumbai.
Look, your bus is here.
Go.
Enjoy your ride.
Mumbai... Mumbai...
Bachchhanji, are you ready?
- Should we begin?
- Yes.
And action!
Ashok!!!!!
They heard you, Bachchhan.
Time to move on.
- My mother,
- My mother,
My father,
My... Just a minute, madam.
My father,
My father,
- My father,
- My mother has my father...
You remember any of Amitabh
Bachchan's dialogues?
Just say them.
Sometimes I think...
That I still don't pick
up money thrown on the ground.
Because where I stand...
But the truth is that police
of 12 countries are looking for Don.
But it is not just
difficult to catch Don...
It is impossible.
Because I am your father.
And my name is... Ashok!!!!
Did you get the parcel from Mumbai?
Yes, boss.
Myraji, you didn't say
anything about my acting.
Bachchhanji, sorry, but honestly
acting isn't your cup of tea.
You burp while saying
your dialogues.
I didn't fart, did I? So?
How do I do it?
You don't get it.
My producer wouldn't agree.
- He won't give money.
- Yo blabbermouth!
Open the trunk.
Open it, Kaandi.
Do you want a pillow and a blanket?
You will enjoy sleeping here.
Come on out.
Look over there.
Sir!
You...
- Like this?
- I brought him here.
Hey!
You are making a movie about me.
My toothpick!
Tooth?
Biopic.
listen producer?
Tell her.
We'll surely make
a big-budget film, Myra.
I am very happy to launch Mr.
Bachchhan Paandey.
No compromise from
the production side.
Well done.
Come, let's get you a nice lunch.
Bachchhanji,
you want to be a hero, right?
Then you will have
to take acting classes.
Okay?
Bachchhanji, your whiskey.
Listen director?
I am sure there must be roles for
his friends as well in his movie?
We too will take the acting class.
- Right.
- You too want to act?
Who else will play
his friends in not us?
This is not how it is done.
You cannot just...
Stay within your limit.
- Have you lost your mind?
- No, no, no.
You can learn how to act.
All of you can.
Right, Myra?
- Yes, yes, yes.
- Yes, you can. You can all learn.
Just one thing.
The teacher shouldn't
learn that all of you are...
you know goons?
Right.
No one will raise
his hand in front of him.
No one will fight,
hit, or kill anyone.
No violence.
Okay?
Because he is not
an ordinary teacher.
"I am not mad, I am not mad at all."
"I am not mad, I am not mad at all."
Bachchhanji,
just like you are Baghwa's Don,
he is the Don of the acting field.
Bhavesh Bhoplo from Bhavnagar.
Okay.
Sorrow.
Beauty.
Courage.
Anger.
Fear.
Disgust.
Surprise.
Laughter.
Everyone, laugh.
Silence!
You must at awe looking
at my talent, right?
It is what is it.
- It's there.
- Yes. Right.
But I have never
been too proud about it.
I can turn you all into
actors in just one minute.
With just a touch.
Then why does he need to teach?
He should just touch them and leave.
Right?
Just a touch, hmm?
Like this.
Actor! Actor! Actor!
Star! Star! Star!
Be it Marlon Brando or a Crazy Fool!
You there, you find it funny, huh?
You find it funny, huh?
Stand up. Stand up.
Attitude, look.
That makeup on your face!
On your eyes and your nose...
Bhavesh sir will do it in reality!
What do you think
a teacher's job is, huh?
Someone who punishes his
students and bears the consequences.
Well said boss.
He has no matters, sir. Ignore him.
Come here, come here.
- Sir, sir, this is his first time.
- Come here.
- Let him go.
- No, no, no.
Come here. Come.
I have come across many
such actors in my life.
You find it funny, huh?
Step back, step back.
Back, back, back.
Bhavesh sir teaches laughter.
He is not a joke.
Hey!
How dare he raise his hand
on Bachchhan Boss! I'll not spare him!
- One second, one second, one second.
- Wait, wait, wait.
- He raised his hands on Boss!
- Let him go.
We won't be able to make
this movie without this teacher.
Then we won't be able
to make people fear you more.
You just need to tolerate
him for a few days.
I'll give you his address later.
Personally.
He stays in Gujarat.
You can then do whatever
you want to do with him.
But you really need
to calm down now.
Please, Bachchhanji.
For me?
Sorry.
Let me make myself
louder and clearer.
Huh?
None of the actors under
me have ever done a shitty job.
Got it?
We are doing a gangster movie and
you don't even know how to hold a gun.
This is how you hold a gun.
Like this.
It will be fun to sculpt
these stones, Myra.
Whitestone, black stone, granite.
Let's do a workshop.
There should be no
negativity inside an artist.
Negativity out exercise.
- Sir?
- No, sorry.
All of you will repeat it.
Very good, very good.
What is wrong?
Do you I look like
a dumpster to you?
No, no, no, no, no!
No.
You have negativity inside you.
Take it out.
Only you.
What do I do?
It's hot now.
Tomorrow morning Bhavesh
sir will conduct his first class.
5:00 am.
Five o'clock.
No, I cannot wake up at five.
Fatso, you'll shower
and show up at four.
Does anyone else
have a problem with it?
Bhavesh sir will see
you tomorrow morning.
- Myra?
- Okay.
Just a touch.
The most important thing you need to learn
is switching from laughing to crying.
And switching from
crying to laughing.
You only need to do what
Bhavesh sir tells you to do.
You cry, the audience will cry.
You laugh, the audience will laugh.
Come on now, get on with it.
Get your sorrows out.
If someone hits you,
think about that and cry.
Vipul Patel has slapped me.
Damyanti sister had hit
me with her sandals.
I am thinking about it.
It is coming.
Look, it is here.
It is here.
It's free-flowing.
Got it.
Bhavesh sir can cry a bucket full.
A bucket full of tears.
Bachchhan...
Bachchhan, cry.
Bachchhan...
Bachchhan, cry.
Cry, Bachchhan! Bachchhan...
Come on, Bachchhan, cry.
An actor needs to
have a hunger to perform.
Let me prove my point.
We have a female mouse here
and a hungry male mouse here.
Put a bread here.
Release the mouse.
He won't go move towards the female.
He will run towards the bread.
Now replace the bread with a cake.
Release the mouse and he will run
towards the cake and not the female.
Replace the cake with a biscuit.
Release the mouse,
and he will run towards
the biscuit and not the female.
What does this prove?
Hunger is a very powerful weapon.
Teacher?
You keep changing the food item.
Yeah.
What not change the female once?
In my 20 years of a teaching career,
this is the first I have interacted
with such uncouth, stupid idiots.
You are the worst actors
I have come across.
You are like cow dung.
- Myra?
- Yes, sir?
Crowd.
And you?
Come here.
Come here, come.
Won't you take your
teacher's blessings?
Just a touch.
Myra, click.
Is this how you seek blessings?
How is this my fault?
You only said, "just a touch".
Decent touch.
Not like this.
Listen, you idiot,
today, is the first day of shooting.
We often spit while
reciting our dialogues.
It's natural.
Like I pity you.
Say it.
Repeat.
I pity you.
[Chant]
Bachchhanji, drop your cigarette
and stand on the mark.
Right. Good.
Now point the gun.
I don't have a gun.
Where's the gun guy!
Just point whatever
you have in your hand.
Right.
Tell me or I'll break your jaw.
Speak up!
- Gautam Buddha...
- Cut! Cut!
Who is he?
Bachchhanji,
tell him what the dialogue is.
Gautam Buddha told Angulimaar...
Got it?
This is how it is done.
Hey, I have become a teacher now.
Come on.
Where is Bachchhan?
We are loosing light.
Don't make me hit you.
Go get him.
Bachchhan?
Bachchhan?
Why are you practicing
the action scene now?
Shot is ready.
Bloody moron.
Let's go.
He insults you a lot, Boss.
He makes me very angry.
I will kill him one day.
No let it be.
I am not doing anything
because of Myra.
Let us complete the film first.
Then we will make teach
him a lesson, our style.
Myra, Bachchhanji
is standing on the mark.
The shot is ready.
Yeah.
Let me see the shot.
Ready?
Roll sound.
- Scene 15c, Shot 1.
- Camera.
Action.
Cut. It's okay.
One more. One more.
Take two.
I have left everything
to be with you, Sophie.
Cut, cut, cut.
One more.
Cut, cut, cut, cut.
Take 18.
I have left everything, Sophie.
Now I will...
Now...
Cut.
- What do we do?
- Do one thing.
It's a back shot.
You do it.
- Two minutes, sorry.
- Okay.
It's okay.
It's okay.
Forget everything.
Assume that no one is here.
This is your story.
Your love story.
Sophie and your story.
Close your eyes.
Now open your eyes and
try to assume that I am Sophie.
Mr. Beards, start rolling.
Sophie.
I have left everything
to be with you.
I cannot live without you, Sophie.
I will fulfill all your wishes, Sophie.
I have just one request.
Never leave me and go, Myra.
"Call and I will be there, my love."
"I will die for you if I have to,
my love."
"Love is the only religion I follow,
my love."
"Love is the only religion I follow,
my love."
"I will never forget you, my love."
"Call and I will be there, my love."
"I belong to you."
"I am yours."
"I am all yours."
Sorry.
- "I cannot sleep at all."
- It was a good shot!
"I belong to you."
"Love is the only religion I follow,
my love."
"Love is the only religion I follow,
my love."
"You keep my passion alive."
"You are my peace."
- "I cannot survive a single day without you."
- Cute!
"My blood is very shameless
in this case, my love."
"Love is the only religion I follow,
my love."
"You can cut my tongue
if I ever question you."
"I can stop breathing for you,
my love."
"Call and I will be there, my love."
And action!
"I belong to you."
"I am yours."
"I am all yours."
"I cannot sleep."
"I cannot sleep at all."
"I belong to you."
Cut it!
"Love is the only religion I follow,
my love."
Good job!
- "This world will feel empty without you."
- You did well.
- "I'll make you experience heaven on earth, my love."
- She wanted to give a high-five. I know.
High five!
"Call and I will be there, my love."
Today we pack up our film and
celebrate the Producer's birthday.
- Excellent. Happy birthday, sir.
- Thank you very much.
We will sing the birthday
hymn for the Producer.
- A hymn?
- Yes.
- "Time and again, this day comes..."
- A flower.
- "Time and again, this day comes..."
- It's a flower.
Look, a flower.
Hey, why did you move it?
He was taking a lot of to say it,
so I had to show it to him.
- Let me keep it back.
- Are you crazy?
What do I do?
He was asking me about the flower.
Shoot is over Kaandi,
now we will make Guruji's life miserable.
Hey, hey, hey!
Stop it, you idiots!
Stop it, you idiots! I am naked!
You...
Oh my god, Guruji.
What have you done to yourself?
This... Paandey?
I don't know whether your touch
will turn them into actors or not,
but their touch has certainly
turned you into a patient.
- No, no, no.
- No?
- Didn't Bhavesh sir say that he
will make them act like real goons? - Yes.
- And he done it.
- Hmm.
One touch and they became actors.
Did you touch them
or did they touch you?
They touched me.
- I can see that.
- They didn't just touch me.
- I see.
- They caught me.
- They grabbed me. They threw me.
- Oh.
They beat the daylights out of me.
Not even real goons
would hit that hard.
I see.
But my pain, their gain.
They all become actors,
just with one touch.
Just a touch.
- Careful! Be careful.
"I am not mad,"
- Should I?
- Help me?
- Sure. - "I am not mad at all."
- You too will become an actor,
- with just a touch.
- Let's go.
- "I am not mad,"
- Just a touch.
- "I am not mad at all."
- Let me give you a push.
So now...
So now?
So now, you are not
going to come back?
Not immediately.
I need to edit the
film and promote it.
Right.
I have a lot of
work to do in Mumbai.
Actually,
what's really stressing me out is
what if you don't like
the movie I have made?
I am certainly never going
to come back here if you don't.
Come on, stop this sham!
There is no way I won't like your movie.
I am confident that you
will make an excellent film.
A mind-blowing film.
Oh, I left you behind.
Yes...
What are you thinking, Ms. Myra?
Will you miss me?
Bachchhan brother?
Why are you not answering
your phone? We have good news.
Bhagat boss has come back to life.
He is taking your name.
He said, "call Bachchhan."
Year after year, day and night...
You took such good care of me,
Bachchhan.
Doctors told me everything.
You were the one who saved
me when they attacked me.
Sit.
Sit down.
I told you, no one can kill you.
Except me.
Why did you kill Sophie, huh?
I had killed Bhima,
and I found the same bundled cash
with him that I had given to you.
Laaji!
All the crops get the same
amount of water from the well,
yet bitter gourd turns out to be bitter,
sugarcane turns out to be sweet
whereas tamarind
turns out to be sour.
Water is not to be blamed here,
but the seed is.
And you are that
bad seed in my life.
That's why I immediately
left from there to slit your throat,
but look at my bad luck,
you went into coma.
I could have easily killed
you on this hospital bed.
But the one who is dying
should know why he is dying.
I was waiting for you to regain
consciousness so that I can kill you.
Why did you kill Sophie?
Why did you kill Sophie, huh?
Why did you kill Sophie?
Boss, I didn't understood one thing,
why is the Director
name this film B.P.?
She should have kept
it Bachchhan Paandey, instead.
Just like Kolar Gold
Fields is known as K.G.F.,
Bachchhan Paandey in
short is known as B.P.
Awesome!
Good one, brother. Good one.
Amazing.
This means this movie won't just
be a hit, it will be a super hit.
Coming soon in a theatre
near you this Friday...!
B.P.!!!
3:00 pm, 6:00 pm,
and 9:00 pm are the showing timings.
If you don't come,
you are surely dying.
Everyone in one voice
say - Long live B.P.!
Start the movie!
Yay!
"Here comes... Bhola Pandey!"
"Bhola... Pandey!"
Hey, full form of B.P.
is Bhola Pandey?
Why not Bachchhan Paandey?
Ignore it.
The title doesn't matter.
A movie about the real Bachchhan
Paandey is about to begin now!
Yay!
"Here comes... Bhola Pandey!"
"Bhola... Pandey!"
Wasn't Boss holding
that rose during the rehearsals?
Yes.
Where's the gun?
Roll rehearsal?
Point the gun now.
- I don't have a gun.
- Where's the gun?
Just point whatever
you have in your hand.
Speak up, I'll break your jaw.
Gautam Buddha once said to Angulimaar,
"Go and pluck a few
leaves from that tree."
Angulimaar went, plucked
a few leaves, and brought them back.
After that Buddha said,
"Now go back fix those
leaves back on the tree."
He couldn't do that.
What do we learn from that?
We learn that we have no
right to break things we cannot fix.
Weren't you explaining that
dialogue to the other actor, Boss?
Bachchhan, can you please
show him how to do it?
Come here.
Okay, brother.
Grab me.
This movie is completely
the opposite of what she shot.
Bachchhan wanted to be the Devil
and she portrayed him as a Saint.
"Oh my, you just killed me."
"Squeeze me in your arms, oh my love."
When did you dance like that,
Boss?
"Oh my, you just killed me."
"Oh my king, come
and take place in my heart."
"Pick me up in your arm,
it will be so much fun."
"Oh my king,"
She completely changed
the lyrics of the song.
"Pick me up in your arm,
it will be so much fun."
"Oh my, you just killed me."
"Squeeze me in your arms, oh my love."
- Yes, yes!
- "Oh my, you just killed me."
"Squeeze me in your arms, oh my love."
"Oh my, you just killed me."
"Oh my king,
come and take place in my heart."
"Pick me up in your arm,
it will be so much fun."
But it is not just
difficult to catch Don...
"Oh my, you just killed me."
"Oh my king,
come and take place in my heart."
I am certainly never going to come back here
if you don't like the movie I have made.
You are such a funny clown, Bachchhan!
Let him go, Boss! You won't
gain anything by hitting him.
- Let him go.
- You think I am funny, huh?
- Boss! Let him go.
- Leave me.
- Let him go.
- Let's go.
She made a fool of us.
This is definitely
the most comedy film of the year.
I am totally impressed.
What a comedy movie!
Myraji this film really cracked me out.
- Thank you maam.
- Outstanding picture.
- Thanks.
- Outstanding comedy!
Thank you, thank you.
'They'll start respecting me
after you've earned your respect.'
Please wait or call again later.
She played me.
She deceived me.
She was playing with us all along.
And we, the ostrich that we are,
couldn't understand her game plan.
Boss,
shall we move to the other theatre?
Drive straight home!
I am not trying to
justify his actions, sir.
What is wrong is obviously wrong.
But every coin has two sides.
A good side and a bad side.
So, I showed the side that I saw.
'Myra ma'am, how was the shooting
experience with Bachchhan!
You weren't scared
of Bachchhan Paandey?
No.
In fact, no one will fear Bachchhan
Paandey after watching this film.
'In fact,
they'll see a different side to him.'
You know, as to why he is the way he--
I always ensured
that people fear me,
and that girl ruined
it all in just one day.
I'll burn her alive!
Yes?
- We need to leave.
- Hi.
- Got it?
- Myra?
I am very curious to know,
how did you convince Bachchhan
Paandey with this script?
Actually ma'am, I didn't convince him.
I used hidden cameras.
This is how I had made a
short film on my father as well.
Myra, that was your father.
Okay? This is Bachchhan Paandey.
He's everyone's father.
Where are you Vishu!
- Check there. Back there.
- Where are you? Come on out.
- Where is that Vishu?
- He has been calling you nonstop since morning.
Your movie is a hit.
Everyone will watch it.
We will have to go
underground for a while.
He is right.
Why do we have to underground?
He will kill both of us.
Do you understand?
Ask your father to
leave for his hometown.
We will go and hide in Kota.
My uncle has a house there.
- Trust me. I am serious.
- Are you serious?
I am serious.
Bye-bye.
Nice meeting you.
I have already peed 16 times.
Just shut up and pee.
We'll be fine.
I think we should go back to Mumbai.
Get down!
Please, don't!
Do you know what happened
before I came here?
Jagga brother died
in a gang war with Balli.
Why are there so less people in here?
He is a very famous
don of this area.
Everyone respected him.
What you call respect
is actually fear.
Jagga sir is dead?
I heard that his dog died.
His dog is alive.
Jagga brother is dead.
- Bye.
- Where are you going?
Pay your respect before you leave.
Why bother?
I'd have offered my condolences
to Jagga sir if his dog has died.
Now that Jagga sir is dead,
who do I offer my condolences to?
His dog?
The name of god is the truth.
The name of god is the truth.
- Brother?
- The name of god is the truth.
The name of god is the truth.
Who is she?
Virgin's wife and his daughter.
Please forgive me.
Hello.
I saw your movie.
I liked it.
I never stepped out of
the house after his death.
Your men forcefully made
us watch the movie.
My daughter laughed
after a long time.
She has become a fan of yours.
She wants to watch your movie again.
Didn't you want to
say something to brother?
Tell him.
Tell him, dear.
Uncle is a busy man.
Tell him.
Uncle, uncle,
you were superb in the movie.
I thoroughly enjoyed your dance.
Are you done?
Shall we go now?
We'll get going now.
Does she know that I
am the one who killed Virgin?
No, Boss.
She thinks Rana Lohia killed
Virgin and we killed Rana Lohia.
She is coming back.
Well... she wants to
shake hands with you.
You want to, right?
Go ahead.
Stop, stop, stop.
Go back.
Naresh.
Remove the House Full board.
I didn't put it there, Boss.
Theatres are indeed running full.
Son?
Son listen.
Come here.
I watched your film.
You did?
It's very nice.
I saw it twice.
Hmm.
People were laughing
out of their seats.
They were clapping and whistling!
I really loved it.
I am going to watch
it again this evening.
That girl?
Your director?
She made us see a side of you
that even I had never seen before.
I swear.
My Bhola Pandey...
O' my Bhola Pandey...
Mother.
In life,
always do things that make
people respect you and not fear you.
They should love you.
My son.
Breaking a hand doesn't
help you earn respect.
You earn respect when you fold
your hands and show respect to others.
You are the one who
made me realize that.
Everyone feared me,
and yet I couldn't get
my mother to talk to me.
Today, because of you,
my mother addressed me as "son".
Fear, swag, Bachchhan Paandey have
no value before a mother.
You have given me the
biggest gift of my life.
I am indebted to you.
He is behind.
Run!
So, Sangram sent you here?
You got that right.
Your game is over now.
Cut it.
How was the shot?
Good?
Did I do well?
Good. Good shot.
Well done.
Thank you.
Hey thank you.
Oh sorry, sorry, sorry.
Sorry, sir. Shot?
You did well, my boy.
You did very well.
Thank you so much. Thank you, thank you.
Thank you, thank you.
'Only those who desire to
touch the moon can reach the stars.'
'Bachchhan Paandey touched
me and became a star.'
'Just a touch.'
'Not that's not the
only thing that's changed.'
'Bela Bar became a cow-shed.
'You know the song
Pendulum sings these days?'
'I need to milk four
bottles every day.'
'Kaandi too spitted out the negativity
he used to get from porn films.'
This way, please.
'This was like,
stepping into another shoe.'
'He only plays religious
movies in the theatre these days.'
'And Vishu?'
'He finally got the lead role.
Like this.'
'I am happy to have
you as my lead hero.'
- Thank you!
- Okay.
'And what happened in this year's award'
And the best debutant
director goes to...
Myra Devekar!
Yay!
- Congratulations, Myra.
- Thank you, thank you.
And the next award is
for the best debutant actor.
And this award goes to...
Myra, please do the honors...
Bhand Chand Bhatawade.
Bhand Chand Bhatawade!
Here he is!
And the next award is for
the best actor in a comic role.
Myra, can you please do the needful?
Bachchhan Paandey.
For the film, Bhola Pandey!!!
Brother yes!
- He got it for comedy role.
- Me? Comedy!
At least he got and award.
No, brother. Not from there
take the stairs.
- Give it here.
- Over here.
- Oh.
- Congratulations.
Did you miss me?
Huh?
Are you deaf?
- No.
- You didn't miss me?
No, I did, I did.
I missed you a lot.
Missed you a lot, Ms. Myra.
So beautiful.
Thank you friends,
We will be waiting for the..
And I, Bhavesh Bhoplo,
I became international acting teacher,
teaching art in conflicted zone.
Is this how you hold it?
Is this how you hold a grenade?
Hold it like this,
remove the pin, and done.
Good reaction. Good reaction.
We have time. We have time.
Negativity out.