Baggage Claim (2013) Movie Script
Marriage has always been
a big deal to my mother.
She loves weddings.
Especially hers.
And hers.
And hers.
And, well...
you get the picture.
But as easy as it was for
my mom to get married...
Whee!
My relationships...
have never been
cleared for takeoff.
I fell in love again
and it happened in a minute
My eyes shot out like a fish out
of water and I'm jumpin' in it
Oh, I don't hold back
No, I don't hold back
I never stay within the lines
I don't hold back
No, I don't hold back
I'm gonna take what's mine
Oh, don't get scared for me
Just be prepared for me
'Cause I'm in love with love
In love
When it comes to love
can't get enough
I'm not gonna change, I'm not gonna
change, I'm not gonna change my ways
'Cause I'm in love with love
When it comes to love
can't get enough
Can't get enough
I always wanted to be a
flight attendant. It's a great job.
You get to travel around the world,
meet interesting people
and see exotic places.
But that hasn't left
a whole lat of time for love.
My mom says it's
because I'm too picky.
I don't think I'm picky.
I just know what I don't want.
I don't want a man
with wandering eyes.
Or one that cares
more about his work than me.
I don't want a guy with
too much attitude.
Or too little ambition.
But I also don't want
to end up alone...
living in a house
full of cats...
smelling like soup.
And I don't want to spend
my entire life...
listening to my mother tell me
how she can find five husbands...
and I can't even find one.
But she won't be able
to say that for long.
A few months ago, I met this
amazing guy on a flight to Miami.
His name is Graham.
And I think he's the one.
"I've had a change
of business plans...
"...and it looks like I'll be spending
Thanksgiving at home in Chicago."
"I know it's short notice, but..."
Give me that.
"... If you can make it, I would love
for you to join me for a weekend...
"...you'll never forget."
"Love, Graham."
Graham is...
Someone I've been dating
for a few months.
- Wow. A few months? That's a record, Mo.
- Shut up.
Ta-da!
Montana! Buongiorno!
Buongiorno, Taylor.
It's zeppole. Italian donuts.
Thank you, but I'm
watching my figure.
Okay, but if you
change your mind, there's plenty.
- Aw!
- Ciao bella.
- Ciao bella.
- I'll get you some milk.
Sounds great.
She's so sweet.
What's with the Italian?
She planned a trip to Rome
for our one-year anniversary.
William!
How do you turn your oven off?
Oh! Okay, babe, I'll be right there.
I just put in a new oven.
Of course you did.
Are you ever going to finish that place?
- William?
- Hey?
Got it.
Aw, I'm coming.
- Okay, good.
- Okay.
I got to go.
Yes, you do.
Good luck in Rome.
If it were me,
I would have chosen Paris.
Hmm.
So romantic.
Good luck in Chicago.
You think just because someone...
sends me a rose, I'm just going
to fly off to whatever town he's in?
Absolutely.
According to my mother, you're not
a lady unless you're married...
on or before your 30th birthday,
and you're not a woman
until you've had at least two kids.
If you Te not a lady
and you Te not a woman...
you're like my best friend, Gail.
Warm nuts?
Oh, I'm so sorry.
I got your nuts all messy.
Sorry about that.
That all better?
Good.
Happy Thanksgiving. Welcome.
I could have been late, too.
Remember 9F?
Boston to Cleveland?
He invited me to his cabin in Vermont.
But I couldn't go.
Why? Because I had to
be at work on time.
- Happy Thanksgiving.
- Hi.
Why are you working?
I thought you were off.
I was. And now I'm not.
Hello.
Sam.
I misplaced my badge.
Gail, could you check your cleavage?
Trolling for men again, I see.
Hi. Welcome aboard.
So check this out.
A friend of my cousin's...
bought a penthouse
on top of the Water Tower
and he's having a party tonight.
Lots of celebrities.
Oprah's supposed to be there.
And Stedman.
How often does that happen?
I have a plus one...
it has your name on it.
Don't thank me, it's no problem.
Wow, Sam.
That sounds amazing.
I'd love to... but I can't.
A person would need a hell of a
reason not to party with Oprah.
Like dying or giving birth
or getting married.
Cranberry juice.
You're getting married?
Montana is not getting married.
If she was, being her best
friend, I'd know first.
- I'm not getting married.
- See?
Not yet.
See? Does Mr. Not Yet have a name?
Graham.
Graham Jackson.
5C, Philadelphia
to Chicago Graham Jackson?
Blue Label on the rocks,
seven figures a year Graham Jackson?
He could have invited
me for any holiday.
Christmas, New Year's Eve.
But Thanksgiving?
Thanksgiving feels like... forever.
- Yes, it does.
- You think so?
There'll be more than
turkey getting stuffed.
Such a hooker.
Shut up. Does your mother know?
No, and she won't
until I have a ring on this finger,
which may be this weekend.
I just have a feeling.
I'm sorry.
Be right there with your vodka.
Montana...
when my grandmother
was very sick, she gave me this.
I couldn't understand
what she was saying...
she was in and out of
consciousness, but...
I want you to have it.
It'll help you find true love.
Aw! Thank you, Sam.
That's so sweet.
I'm about to go.
But before I do,
I want you to have these.
Cranberry flavored
for the holidays.
Go get 'em, girl.
Thanks, Gail.
These waters
Can get a little busy
But I've got experience
Don't mind trekking
through the storm
Wow.
Graham, you've talked
about this for so long.
I can't believe I finally got to see it.
It's absolutely beautiful.
This is the first
time we're together
in the city where I actually live.
I wanted this to be special.
It is.
I wanted you to see a part of
me that most people don't.
Look at that water.
It just seems like it could go
on and on, forever and ever.
That's what I felt
the day you walked into my life.
And I was hoping...
that we could go on and
on and on and on. Forever.
Really?
And ever since we first met
I knew that I,
I knew I was ready baby
To take that dive
I'll be inside when
the tides are rolling baby
You'll be at my place tonight,
all night
All night, baby
I'm not afraid to try
And knew I, don't mind
playing in the rain
And I was hoping that I'd get to
Take that dive
It's raining and I don't mind
if I get wet, baby
Lovin' made you so wet,
your legs, your thighs
And ever since we first met
I knew that I
I knew I was
ready, baby
To take that dive
Sweetie?
We're here.
I thought we were
going to your house.
We were. But I got an
emergency phone call.
I have to fly to New York.
There's tons of paperwork
I have to look over.
I have to prepare for a meeting.
I'm sorry.
I booked you in the
best suite in town.
I'll make it up to
you when I come back, I promise.
I could help you.
I could come with you.
That's sweet.
Let me just take care
of this business.
I'll be back in a couple days.
Then it's just me and you.
- All right?
- Okay.
Yes?
Are you guys doing it?
No. If we were doing it,
I would not be answering my phone.
I would. So, how was it?
None of your business.
That bad, huh?
I didn't say it was bad.
You didn't say it was good.
It was good.
- Damn good.
- Then why are you on the phone?
If you must know,
Graham had an emergency...
business call and had to
fly out for an early meeting.
Being a gentleman...
he put me up at this amazing
hotel in one of the best suites.
Girl, please.
Montana, that man did not ask
you to fly all the way...
to Chicago on
Thanksgiving to insist...
that you stay in a hotel.
I smell a rat.
I don't want to hear it.
Hear what?
That he dropped you off
so he can dip his turkey neck
in another woman's gravy?
Graham is not seeing another woman.
- Prove it.
- How?
Go to his house and
see for yourself.
Gail, I am not
going over to that man's house.
Do you know how crazy
that would make me look?
Gail, I'm here.
- Where?
- Graham's house.
He came back and picked you up.
Sort of.
You went to his house uninvited?
You told me to.
I didn't think you'd do it.
Are you kidding me?
- What are you doing now?
- Going to his front door.
Umm-umm. Do not knock
on that man's door.
You'll look like a stalker.
Right now you just look desperate.
What am I supposed to do?
Go to the back.
Oh!
Okay.
What the hell was that?
Hello?
He's at the back door.
What do I do?
Do you see a trash can?
- Yeah. Why?
- Get in it.
Are you crazy?
I'm not getting in a trash can.
If I'm wrong about Graham...
- ...and he catches you...
- Hello?
At his house,
forget any future together.
Get in the can!
What are you doing?
I'm in the trash can.
Are you nuts?
You told me to.
Hello?
Montana?
I have to go.
Yes?
What are you doing now?
Looking thru his window.
Gail... it's beautiful.
Any panties on the floor?
No.
He's preparing for his meeting,
just like he said he was.
Gail was wrong.
Graham was alone.
And I was...
right where I wanted to be.
Sipping from the same mug.
Resting on the same rug.
Just the two of us.
And the kids.
And friends.
Toasting to our wonderful life.
What was that noise?
The sound of us toasting.
No, that is the sound of
somebody coming in the house!
Duck!
Un-break my heart
Say you'll love me again
Undo this hurt you caused
Oh my God.
When you walked out the door
And walked out of my life
Un-cry these tears
Montana? You want to talk about it?
Go away.
Hey.
You've been playing
that song all day.
Let's get something to eat.
I don't want to get dressed.
Okay, you don't have
to get dressed.
But you got to get out
of this apartment.
Okay?
I don't have to get dressed?
My cooking always cheers you up.
A little wine.
- Mo, you love avocado.
- All right.
Look at that.
Hey, vegan!
We are so excited. We wanted
you to be the first to know.
I wanted you to be
the first to know.
After me.
I'm engaged!
Derrick proposed
with a two-carat diamond ring!
I didn't get my first carat
until my third marriage.
Montana, does this single rose mean
you're not single anymore?
It's nothing.
Sheree's fiance is taking us
all out to dinner tonight.
I'm borrowing those earrings
I bought you for Christmas.
Oh, yes, honey. I should
have bought them for myself!
He's on track to break
the college record
for most receptions in a season,
maybe win a Heisman.
You know I'm happy for
you, right, Sheree?
But...
you're just a
sophomore in college.
You barely
know what you want to major in...
much less, who you want to
spend the rest of your life with.
Why now?
Why not now? He's a great guy.
And I don't want
to wait until I'm all old, like...
Like me.
I didn't mean it like that.
What do you think?
Yes? Fabulous? I hate them.
Mom's letting me wear
her wedding dress.
You can pick
whichever one you want.
Only one thing that would make
this the best wedding ever.
A bridesmaid again?
I can't go to
my little sister's wedding single.
I'll be the laughingstock
of my entire family.
If you need a man,
I can get you one.
Hey!
Don't embarrass me.
It's not a man I need...
it's a husband,
or a potential husband, in a month.
Marry Gail.
If she goes a week
without waxing her moustache,
they'll think it's Steve Harvey.
I'm serious.
Why is it so hard to
find the right guy?
Tell me about it.
Tell me about it.
A girl could have everything...
an MBA, a J-O-B, but no M-A-N.
That's because
men are intimidated by strong women.
I never tell guys
that I have a degree.
That's because you
don't have a degree.
Sam, you keep missing
the damn point.
I should give this back to you.
It's hopeless with me.
You won't show up single.
Give me your phone.
Uh, uh, uh!
Hang on. Now, look.
She hasn't got time
to meet someone new.
So why not revisit somebody old?
But I don't even know...
Picky is single.
If we're lucky, one of these guys
has blossomed into Mr. Right.
Let me see.
She hasn't talked
to any of these guys in years.
If she bumped into
one of them on a plane, she might.
How would I know if
they were traveling?
It's the holiday season...
everyone's traveling.
And when someone
wants to fly, what do they do?
Book a flight.
There's Tanya in ticketing.
I'm Tanya. Welcome to
TransAlliance. May I see your I.D.?
Frankie in the Frequent
Flyer program.
Thank you for choosing
TransAlliance.
I turned them on to my hook-up
at Louis Vuitton so
they owe me biggies.
There's Calvin at
curbside check-in.
Hi, I'm Calvin at curbside.
Welcome to TransAlliance,
a flight you can afford...
where your soul and bag
can be on one accord.
And there's Cedric in security.
First name, Cedric. Last name, take
everything out of your pockets!
I need your pockets
out of your pockets!
For the next few weeks,
any ex of yours
who flies anywhere, we'll know.
We just arrange your schedule
so you're on that flight.
First of all, this is the stupidest
idea ever. Secondly of all...
There's the degree.
Assuming you could find out
when these guys are flying...
which I doubt,
because it's your dumb-ass idea...
Gail!
These are all men you've dated
before, and it didn't work out.
So what is going to
make this any different?
Because this time, she's different.
Same action, same outcome.
New actions, new outcome.
Clearly, we have all
had too much to drink.
This is illegal. We can all get
fired, and we can go to jail.
Or we could come to the aid of
the sweetest...
and most romantically
deserving human being alive...
and help her find the truest
and fastest love of her life.
We have thirty days
and 30,000 miles.
To be brought up on federal charges.
To find me a husband.
I don't understand why you guys
think this is a good idea.
It's the 21st century.
You don't need a man to define you.
Everyone I know
is getting married and having kids.
So what?
I want someone to love me, too.
Someone who thinks I'm the best.
Who only sees me in the room.
I know it might sound corny
or unrealistic, but...
I know he's out there.
And I don't want to
wait any longer.
And you think you can
find him in 30 days?
Of course not!
Maybe?
Hey Sam.
- It actually worked.
- What worked?
Our plan.
He's flying from Los Angeles
to New York, connecting in Houston.
- Who?
- One of your exes.
Damon Diesel.
One second!
You've got to be kidding me.
Damon Diesel
could barely take care of himself,
much less a family.
Google him. He's produced three
number-one singles
in the last year.
And he's Essence?
"Bachelor of the Month".
He is looking for Mrs. Diesel.
Hey! I'm on the toilet!
Sam? I love you,
- but I'm not getting on that flight. Okay?
- Montana!
Oh, God, my mother
came over uninvited again.
I will jack you up!
I will jack you up hard!
I got to go.
Montana.
Honey, Mama's having a rough day.
All this planning for
your sister's wedding...
it's making me feel
like such a failure.
Mom, five marriages
doesn't make you a failure.
I wasn't talking about me.
I started thinking...
my youngest
daughter is marrying a wonderful...
handsome, athletic young man.
Yes, she is.
And I might not even be alive to
see my oldest do the same.
Anyway, we have to discuss your
sister's rehearsal dinner...
seeing you are a
maid of honor again.
I would love to talk about this,
but I have a flight to catch.
Why didn't you tell me
you had a flight to catch?
If you had called, I
would have told you.
Make sure you call me when you land.
I will call you whenever
I get to wherever I'm going.
- I love you.
- Yeah, I love you.
Sam? What's the flight number?
I fell in love again
and it happened in a minute
My eyes shot out like a fish out
of water and I'm jumpin' in it
Oh, don't get scared for me
Just be prepared for me
'Cause I'm in love with love in love
Taxi!
Taxi! Taxi!
William! William!
Sorry!
I have to get to the airport
fast... it's an emergency.
- Somebody's looking good.
- Yeah?
I almost didn't recognize you.
Some of us like to update our
image every decade or so.
This was the truck my father bought
before he started his business.
It's vintage.
I wasn't talking about the truck.
You want to get to the airport?
So what's the occasion?
Oh,
I'm meeting a friend in Houston,
then we're flying to New York.
Why fly all the way to Houston
to meet a friend
when New York is just an hour away?
He doesn't exactly know I'm meeting him.
It's a surprise.
Would this have anything to
do with Sheree's wedding?
It has nothing to do with it.
Okay, maybe it does. A little.
My parents were together
almost 40 years...
before my dad passed away.
He kept the same job.
Drove the same truck.
And stayed in love
with the same woman.
Every night at six, there was an
oven-cooked meal waiting for him.
The same one?
Poor woman.
You know, Mo...
the magic isn't
in getting married.
It's in the staying married.
Yeah.
William, I can't thank you enough.
Bye.
Wish me luck, okay?
I got my bag.
I know, I know.
- Your phone.
- I'm sorry. Bye.
Hey! Hey!
- Your earpiece.
- I'm sorry. You know me.
Okay, see you later!
- Thank you!
- Mo!
Mo! Your lipstick!
She's always forgetting something.
Cedric!
Nobody move! Back up! Nobody move!
Sorry. Excuse me, it's an emergency.
I have no life! Which gives
me all day to ruin yours!
Welcome aboard
TransAlliance flight 143.
Sam, I'm on the plane in a dress
I can barely breathe in.
But he's not here.
- Who?
- Damon Diesel. He's not on the flight.
He is.
No, he's not.
This is ridiculous.
I don't know how
you convinced me to do this,
but I'm leaving. I love you, bye.
I'd love to be the
stitches in that skirt.
Montana Moore.
Damon Diesel.
- Wassup?
- Wow. Not much.
You look great.
You're in first class?
That's the only way to ride.
Okay, I'll be sitting down.
Usually, I don't really
write about jewelry
It's foolery, But something
about the way you look on my arm
An arm on my neck
like you're my charm
So, so fresh when we
step out at midnight
Up to the spat we
chill and sit tight
How long are you in town?
Two or three days.
I have meetings and family to see.
How long are you in town?
Long enough.
Long enough for what?
Long enough for us to spend some
quality time, if I'm allowed.
You're allowed.
Great. Let's go.
Let's go.
After you.
I can't believe we
ran into each other. It's crazy.
I'm busy.
Damon Diesel.
What's up, baby?
Can I get you something to drink?
The usual.
A bottle of Chateau Margaux
'66, coming right up.
You should think way
larger than that.
- London, Dubai.
- Your check.
Thank you.
See you next time.
Damon, I should
probably get back to my hotel.
I have an early morning, and...
a girl does need
her beauty rest.
Real talk?
You could stay awake the rest of
your life and still be beautiful.
Thank you, Damon.
Being with you tonight...
you got a brother on
some till-death-do-we-part shit.
Don't laugh. Why are you laughing?
Damon. I've been
trying to reach you.
Janine, Montana. Montana, Janine.
Hi.
Janine and her
husband work with me at the label.
Can you call me when
you get a moment?
I want to wrap up a few things.
Have a good evening.
It was really nice
to meet you, Janine.
You, too.
Where were we?
To us.
So this is it.
Work hard, play hard, baby.
Clearly.
I want to show you something.
Check this out.
A little different
than the last time you saw me.
You think?
Hope you like it. Come on.
Okay, coming.
It's sexy, right?
Yeah. Wow.
Damon, you're doing big things.
I'm impressed.
I'm not getting in the hot tub.
You know you want to.
Maybe, but I'm not getting in.
Okay.
Will you stop acting silly?
Is that meant to be inviting?
Damon?
Damon! Damon, I know you hear me!
Who is that?
You said you weren't
seeing anybody.
That's Janine.
From the restaurant?
Damon!
Damon, you better open up!
It's your house.
Tell her you're busy.
- I can't.
- Why not?
This ain't my house.
It's hers. I can't afford this shit.
Damon, open this damn door!
- You can afford a Range Rover.
- Uh-uh.
You have a titanium
American Express card.
That's hers, too.
You said she's married.
She is. Sometimes she not.
I know you got that ho
from the restaurant there!
Who's she calling a ho?
Shh!
- I'm not shushing!
- You better shush.
She crazy.
I'll shoot you and that bitch,
'cause you know I'm crazy!
I told you. She crazy.
Crazy! She crazy.
Why are you doing this to me?
Open, open, open, open, open.
Open, open, open!
When she come through the door...
when she break the door
down, you don't want to be here.
Well, where should I be?
I am not getting on
that fire escape.
Damon, open this damn door!
Damon, I got something for you!
- Where is this bitch?
- Nobody's here.
Is Sam's
dumb-ass idea working?
Did he pop the question?
I'm on a fire escape!
I'll assume that's a no.
Anyway, bachelor number two...
is on the flight
in the morning from Atlanta to D.C.
You need to be at JFK in an hour
to catch the last
commuter flight out...
to make his morning
connecting flight.
You've now got...
sixty-nine...
I mean, fifty-nine minutes, honey.
You got fifty-nine minutes.
I'm looking for the bitch, too!
Bitch, where are you!
Could this get any worse?
Hey, Montana, it's your mother.
Listen.
Sheree decided to have a
bridesmaid slumber party.
We're all here in our pajamas
and we want you to come over.
All right, sweetie, I love you.
Uh-uh!
You know you don't
need that cookie. Sit down.
This is your pilot speaking.
The flight time today
to Reagan International Airport
is 1 hour, 40 minutes.
Sit back and enjoy the short flight.
Sir, may I offer you a blanket?
No, thank you.
Montana.
Langston.
Montana.
Curtis. Hi.
- Would you like a blanket?
- I'm okay.
Hey!
Two of m y exes are on the plane.
I know about Langston.
Who's the other guy?
Curtis.
He and Langston are both here.
I'll get Sam.
Curtis is here, too.
You said he got married.
I thought he did, but I don't think
he is now. No wedding ring.
None of the married guys I
date wear wedding rings.
It's tacky.
Go with Langston. He's running for
Congress, so he needs a running mate.
Curtis.
Langston.
You know Montana?
Yeah, we're old friends.
Flight attendants,
prepare the cabin for takeoff
You know, I'm running
for Congress now.
And I'm having dinner tonight
with some potentially major...
campaign contributors.
Would you know a young lady.
Gorgeous, intelligent...
that would be so
gracious as to join me?
If asked, I might.
Consider yourself asked.
Consider yourself answered.
Right over here, this is me.
Wow. Langston,
you've done very well for yourself.
Thank you. This is probably my
favorite room in the house.
I can see why.
Oh, you have a dog!
Montana, this is Juicy.
Juicy, this is Montana.
She's so cute. Can I pet her?
Juicy. Stop that, shame on you.
I'm sorry. She's jealous.
She likes to mark her territory.
- Sorry about that.
- I understand.
If you were around more,
Juicy wouldn't have these problems.
So my being around
more often would be just for Juicy?
Yes, strictly for Juicy.
I hope it's okay... I had my assistant
pick you out something to wear.
I'm assuming your
size is the same as I remember.
I hope so.
It's hanging in the bathroom.
Two doors down to the left.
Great. Okay.
Bye, Juicy. We're going to be friends.
I certainly hope so.
See you shortly.
Juicy, pee.
God, I love that Juicy.
Montana, allow me to introduce
you to Howard Donaldson...
and his beautiful wife, Estelle.
Mr. Donaldson is the owner and
founder of Donaldson Steel...
the largest contractor
in the Washington metropolitan area.
And who might this
stunning young lady be?
She is too pretty to be your date.
You got that right.
This is Montana Moore,
my very significant other...
who was gracious enough to
fly here to join us for dinner.
Well, young lady, I hope you're
prepared to withstand the heat...
which this coming
election will surely bring.
Montana comes from a long line of
flame-retardant women.
She'll be just fine.
All right. I got a
great table, let's go.
Flame retardant.
He surprised me.
How you doing, sir?
May I take your drink order?
I'll have a scotch,
single-malt, on the rocks...
and a Shirley Temple
with extra cherries for my wife.
That sounds good. I'll have
what the gentleman's having.
The lady will also have a
Shirley Temple, extra cherries.
Oh, no, actually, I'd like a...
it's okay, I got it.
A Shirley Temple, please.
Actually, would you excuse us?
Lam dying to show Montana...
the breathtaking
view of the atrium.
Excuse us.
Sweetheart, listen.
These are the kind of contributors
who want to know the candidate
they're investing in is a leader.
A take-charge type of man.
Now, if I sit there
and let you order your own drink,
then that would be
like you're leading.
Please, just bear with me.
I promise, when this
thing is over...
I'll take you anywhere and you can
order for the entire restaurant.
But can you just do me this solid?
For me?
Of course.
- I'll do it for you.
- Thank you.
You look great tonight.
Langston?
Your record in
the city council is impeccable.
Well, thank you.
If you're not elected to
Congress, it won't be because of...
insufficient financial support.
I like that sound.
Mr. Donaldson.
I can't tell you how
much this means to me. Us.
There is no reason you can't
do something for your people.
You could do something really great.
Historic, maybe.
I mean, we're talking the Obamas.
The Williams sisters.
And like Tiger Woods.
Well, if, uh...
you're referring to
the American people...
then, yes, I have
every intention of
making the American
people very proud.
Well, I was thinking specifically
of your people, the black people.
Well, I live in
Georgetown, so I guess
these... these would be my people.
And Tiger Woods lives in Florida,
so those would be his people.
Are you saying that where
Tiger Woods lives...
makes him irrelevant to
people of the same skin color?
You'd first have to
determine Tiger Woods' skin color.
He's black.
Well, I think...
what would make
Tiger Woods black...
would be his
passion for things, uh, that...
are related to the
African-American race as a whole.
Which he has not yet proven to have.
What I think would make
Tiger Woods black...
is the fact he drives an Escalade
and his daddy's name is Earl.
An Escalade? Why...
A daddy named Earl?
It was a joke.
Things were getting heavy
and I was just trying to lighten them up.
Juicy, no!
This is Langston.
Good evening, sir.
Yes, she is quite the funny lady.
I'm sorry?
Of course, I accept.
Thank you again, sir.
Good night.
That was Mr. Donaldson.
He just doubled his contribution.
Apparently your little
Tiger Woods joke...
was the highlight
of his evening.
Juicy! Go pee.
Then the dinner was a success.
Langston, we should celebrate.
Okay.
Sweetheart.
You're so pretty.
There's a saying.
Behind every great man...
there is an even greater woman.
I want that for you.
I want you to be greater.
But sometimes being greater...
means being quiet.
Hmm.
I always thought the saying
was, Beside every great man...
Beside, behind, between...
it's all semantics. The point is...
that if she is
to be great, wherever she is...
she must follow.
And he must lead.
Well, when I led...
I got you twice as much money.
- It's not just about money.
- What is it about?
I'll tell you, Juicy.
I'm running for office.
Did you just call me "Juicy"?
- Did I?
- Yeah, you did.
Well, I apologize.
I don't know how I
could confuse you two,
because Juicy knows how to obey.
Juicy, come!
See that?
You know what?
"New actions, new outcome."
Same asshole, same outcome.
You haven't changed a bit.
And I'm keeping the outfit and
the shoes. I earned them.
Get off, you little rat.
Juicy.
Juicy!
Hello?
Hey, it's me.
I didn't wake Taylor, did I?
No. Her grandma got sick,
so she went out of town to see her.
I'm sorry to hear that.
I hope she feels better.
- You doing anything?
- Not anymore.
Want to watch a movie?
Sure.
Great. Can you pick me up?
You live across the hall.
I'm not at home, silly.
I'm in Georgetown.
Hello?
William?
Hello?
Hello?
Sorry. I guess we got cut off.
No, I hung up.
Yeah, sure, of course.
I guess a 25-year
friendship doesn't give
me the right to call
you or expect you...
to drive less than an
hour when I'm stranded
at midnight in the crime
capital of the world.
Wait, stop, don't! I don't have any
money, or any real friends, either!
Stop!
So cold out there.
Yeah? Comfortable?
Why didn't you get one of your
friends to pick you up?
Oh, that's right. He
lives in Chicago.
Or was it Houston?
No, no, no. New York City, right?
I know this all seems
very silly to you.
I'm sorry you had a rough night.
It has been a very rough night.
God, it's cold in here.
Does "vintage" mean you don't
have any heat in this car?
I'm so cold.
Come sit next to me.
I'll keep you warm.
Thank you for coming.
You're welcome.
You give me hope that there's
still some good men out there.
Are you ever going to
finish this place?
- It'll be finished...
- When it's finished, I know.
I can't believe you're making me
watch a movie at two A.M.
On VHS.
All righty.
Our choices.
- Enter the Dragon.
- Uh-huh.
Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon.
Or The Last Dragon. Whoo!
You have Misery?
The Last Dragon?
There you go.
Get it started. I'll make us some drinks.
Mo?
What color in
the dining room? Cherry or Espresso?
Espresso.
Yeah, that's what I was thinking.
Wait. Is this our
high school yearbook?
Yeah. My mom was cleaning
the garage and found it.
I'm surprised your photo
didn't slide off the page.
You'd be walking around
with that activator...
Funny.
You must have forgot how you looked.
There wasn't a tube of gel in a
thousand miles that was safe.
Oh, my gosh. Look at our prom.
We were gettin' down.
No, I was getting dumped.
My date got jealous and left.
It's not my fault
she couldn't dance.
What was that song
we were dancing to?
I don't love her
I tried to tell myself
But you can see it in my eyes
So don't deny
I can't fool no one else
The truth is in the tears I cry
Cause if it isn't love
Why do I feel this way
Why does she stay on my mind
And if it isn't love
Why does it hurt so bad
Why does she stay on my mind
If it isn't love
Oh, my God.
I'll get us a drink.
This is for you.
- Thank you.
- Mmm-hmm.
Here we go.
This is a toast...
to us never dancing...
or dressing...
like that ever again.
Cheers.
Know what else my mom found?
Some DVD's? A couple romantic
comedies, hopefully?
Stop talking about a
black man's mama.
Remember this?
Please don't tell me
you still have that.
Paging Dr. William Wright.
If not for this, you wouldn't have
known you had a heartbeat.
You didn't know, either,
because you were
always trying to put
it on my booty.
You saying your booty
ain't got a heartbeat?
I don't think it does.
You don't?
Let me check.
Can you check it?
Oh, my God.
I can tell, young lady,
you're of African heritage.
Thank you.
I'm starting to hear something.
Be glad you know a doctor
who makes house calls.
Is that all you can make?
William...
Montana?
William?
Montana, we're here.
We sure are.
You still up for a movie?
Mo, you forgot...
She's always
forgetting something.
Ahh!
That was quite the dream you
were having, little girl.
You were sleeping so
peacefully, I decided
to clean that nasty
little kitchen of yours.
The way a woman keeps her kitchen
is the way she keeps her man.
I ought to know.
Mom...
in the interest of
me keeping my sanity...
I think we should establish
some clear-cut boundaries.
Boundaries.
After 74-and-a-half hours in labor,
struggling to give you life.
This is how you thank me?
Well, you're welcome.
And I am leaving.
Mom?
And do me a favor, Pig-pen.
That funky little attitude you got?
Don't bring that to
your sister's wedding.
We don't need it, okay?
Uh-huh.
Maybe I want to have a
funky little attitude.
Maybe because I'll have
someone of my own.
And I'm bringing
him to the rehearsal dinner.
What do you think about that?
Really, Montana?
You told your mother what?
I had to get her
off my back. You know how she is.
She got off your back, but a
10,000-pound gorilla jumped on.
You'll see.
- I'll see?
- You will.
- Montana.
- Weisha!
It's so good to see you.
Good to see you.
This is my good friend, William.
Hello.
For bridesmaid.
Again.
Try on.
Thank you, Weisha.
For the groom.
Try on.
Um, I'm not the groom.
But you're same size as groom.
Try on.
I need measurement.
This could have been you.
I proposed to you
and your answer was, "Eaugh!"
You proposed to me in elementary
school during recess...
"because you wanted my cupcake...
and the only way to get it...
was by giving me the toy ring
from your Cracker Jack box.
At least I offered
you a ring for it.
That's more than I can say for
the men you've dated since.
Touche. If I had known the
proposals would be so infrequent...
I would have accepted.
And then we'd be married.
Mo, you look amazing.
You don't look half bad yourself.
I have to get this.
Taylor.
How's your grandmother doing?
I miss you, too.
Got one... flight 1763 headed to
Houston, sitting in seat 3A.
Houston, we got a problem!
Move, move, move!
Feet can't touch the ground
And I can't hear a sound
But you just keep on
running up your mouth, yeah
Walk, walk on over there
'Cause I'm too fly to care
Oh, yeah
He's on his way to D.C. Right
there with my President.
This boy got some Frequent Flyer miles.
He's going to Miami.
Got another one, Sam,
on his way to Detroit. Motown!
Just one second.
One minute, please.
One second.
Don't let what they say
keep you up at night
And they can't detain you
'Cause wings are made to fly
And we don't let
nobody bring us down
No matter what you
say, it won't hurt me
Don't matter if I fall from the sky
These wings are made to fly
She like light-skinned dudes?
I got Leo DiCaprio up here.
Do her husband have to be a man?
Now is not the time to get
down on yourself, Montana.
In a week, maybe.
Thank you.
Don't mention it.
Ohh!
Taylor?
Montana. What a...
Ho-ho-ho.
Surprise?
How's your grandmother?
William is better looking.
And he's a great guy.
And she's here being a two-timing...
Whore.
- Montana.
- Taylor.
I know this looks really bad.
But what you don't know is
me and William broke up.
It's a long story. I'd appreciate
it if you don't mention it.
You know how it is when you break up.
The wound's still open.
Sure, yeah.
Thank you.
Could you get me a hot tea?
Two sugars, no cream.
Ciao!
Flight 901 is headed to New Mexico.
Feliz Navidad.
Got another one, Sam, 506...
coming straight
to Los Angeles. You want him?
Do you mind if I...
Sorry, I'm really sorry.
Sorry.
No, Gail, there's
four days left before the wedding.
I'm just going to get
some rest and...
hop on the first
flight in the morning.
Thanks for trying.
Yeah. I love you, too.
Okay. Bye.
Montana Moore.
Do you know what time it is?
It's ten o'clock in L.A.
it's one A.M. in Baltimore.
I know.
I'm sorry, I just thought
maybe you might want to...
you know...
talk.
About?
Come on, William.
How long have we
known each other? You can tell me.
What are you talking about?
I'm talking about...
Montana.
Taylor.
I was thinking about you, too.
Oh, you got another call.
Taylor, don't do that.
And Merry Christmas to you, too.
Bye.
What happened to the Italian guy?
What are you working on?
Just trying to figure things out.
I like this little thing here.
Oh. Yeah?
Anybody in a holiday spirit?
Come on, it's open mike.
A cottage small is all I'm after
Not one that's spacious and wide.
A house that's filled...
What are you guys whispering about?
Hey, I'm singing right now.
Sam e people like the high life.
I like the low life.
Sounds corny and seedy,
but yes, indeed-y,
Give me the simple life
You know? Okay.
Bravo, bravo. That was amazing.
Quinton!
Montana.
Oh, I'm so embarrassed.
Oh, please. Don't be.
You were wonderful.
- Really?
- Well, no.
It's so good to see you.
You, too. I'm so pleased
you still remember me.
Of course I remember you. You
were on my route for over a year.
L.A. to New York.
Let me see if I can remember.
Columbia graduate,
top of your class, of course.
Hobbies-racquetball,
skiing and art.
I guess it's obvious how much I enjoyed
talking to you during our flights.
Luckily, there was always an empty
seat next to you so we could talk.
It wasn't luck.
I paid for both seats.
You didn't.
Of course.
Excuse me.
I have no idea
what you just said, but you don't...
Please. I insist.
Let's go have a drink.
Okay, if you insist.
So you've been a maid
of honor nine times.
I should call
the Guinness Book of World Records.
More like Ripley's
Believe It or Not.
It could have been ten, actually...
but my cousin called off her
third wedding the day before.
So it's really nine
with an asterisk.
Yeah, I know.
As you requested, Mr. Jamison.
Oh, Quinton, this is too much.
You can never have too much of a good
thing. Besides, it's on the house.
You work for the hotel?
I own the hotel.
This hotel?
Yes.
It's a lovely day for going nowhere
It's a lovely day for being in love
It's a lovely day
Feel like chasing the clouds away
To a perfect place I'm dreaming of
It's a lovely day for going nowhere
Have you ever imagined
what it would feel like...
to take off a year
and travel the world?
What woman hasn't?
But without the means or the time...
it remains just that,
a thought, a dream.
So if you were given the means...
would you find the time?
I don't know what you mean.
Oh.
You think this sunrise is beautiful?
Wait till you
see the sunrise in the Serengeti.
Or the view from the top
of the Eiffel Tower.
We could shop in Milan.
Cruise the Greek Isles
on a private yacht.
Wow, that... that sounds incredible.
Quinton, I'm so flattered.
I don't know what to say.
Say... "I accept your invitation."
You mean... your proposal?
If that's what you want
to call it, then yes.
What do you want me to call it?
I'm taking time off
to travel the world
and I'm asking you to join me.
Montana...
if you thought
I was talking about marriage
I've tried it, twice...
and all it did
was ruin two very good friendships.
Listen.
If marriage is what
you need, you should
find someone willing
to give you that.
But if passion and
adventure are what you want,
you'll never want it again.
I'm passing through D.C.
in a couple of days
on my way to Rome, then London...
and then to Greece.
I'll have my assistant book you
a ticket to all three places,
just in case.
Okay.
If you're going to be in D.C...
I'd really like you to come
to my sister's rehearsal dinner.
If won't be anything fancy,
like you're used to, but...
we could talk about it then.
Okay.
Now you get some rest
and think about it. Yes?
Okay.
It's been a great night.
Now I realize why it's
so hard to find the perfect guy.
Maybe he just doesn't exist.
From the first time we met
Saw a glow I can't forget
Felt the sun rise and set
In your eyes
I knew that I wanted
You near me
Is it love I feel?
Tell me, is it real?
Is it love, please tell me
Now
What you doing?
About to
get ready for the rehearsal dinner.
It's your mailman.
From your mailbox.
You didn't have to do that.
And that's from me.
Early Christmas gift.
Thanks.
It'll help get your
mother off your back.
That's no longer a problem.
Tonight at Sheree's
rehearsal dinner,
after my sister
introduces her soon-to-be husband...
I'll make an
introduction of my own.
What's so funny?
You're turning into your mother.
No. I'm just realizing that maybe
fairy tales don't come true.
We weren't all lucky enough
to have parents like you...
that ate dinner every night
together for 40 years.
I never said my
parents were perfect.
They went through
it just like any other couple.
But when they took those
vows, they meant it.
My mom loved my dad.
And my dad loved her back.
Well, my mom loved my dad.
And then she loved another man.
And another man and another man.
People get married and divorced.
That's just what people do.
You spent your life being your own
woman. Why change now?
Who said I wouldn't be my own woman?
I just would really like to
be somebody else's, too.
Somebody's? Or anybody's?
You know what? William...
why don't you save your
really great relationship advice
for someone
who really needs it? Like Taylor...
when she's kissing some
Italian dude at 30,000 feet.
Wow.
That's my cue.
Merry Christmas, Mo.
I thought you should know!
Thank you, I know.
William?
I'm sorry.
Montana, it's your mother.
I have told everybody
about your announcement...
so don't let me down!
Good evening.
As you all know,
my youngest daughter...
is marrying a
handsome young man...
from Rhoda Island.
Rocky Mountains.
What are you doing here?
Same as you, just being nosy.
This is to welcome
him to the family.
And give him a last
chance to back out.
But before I bring you
my youngest daughter...
I'd like to present my oldest...
who has an announcement
that is lovely...
and long overdue.
I give you Montana!
Montana, come up.
Come up here.
So, um...
...I have an announcement..
...as I am sure you are all aware.
The tricky thing about
announcements is...
you need to have
something to announce...
in order for it to
be an announcement.
What is she doing?
I don't know.
So, here it is.
Friends... family...
fellow Americans.
Langston.
Langston?
Montana, I was flipping
through the newspaper...
and saw the notice
for your sister's wedding.
Congratulations.
You look ravishing.
Thank you.
- Montana...
- Who is he?
I thought about what you said.
You were right.
A woman can lead.
Under the right
circumstances, of course.
One of which is a campaign brunch
next week, with a very
influential senator.
A senator.
This is to beside...
behind...
and to nothing...
coming between us.
Montana...
would you...
Oh, yes, she will!
No, I won't.
- Yes, you will.
- I won't.
- Will.
- Won't.
What's gotten into you?
What's gotten into you?
You don't even know this man.
- Hi.
- Hello. How are you?
Fine, thank you.
You're just going to marry me off
to the first person you see?
Unbelievable.
This is a man...
who I would...
never marry.
I wouldn't even vote for you.
I don't trust black
Republicans, I'm sorry.
I'm actually a Libertarian.
You know, I spent the
last thirty days...
looking for somebody, anybody...
to come here tonight.
So I could... fit in.
Be part of the club.
So all of you would say,
"We love you, Montana."
"You did it. We're so proud of you.
You're a lady."
But...
marriage doesn't
make you a lady...
any more than standing in
a garage makes you a car.
That's a weird analogy.
So, um...
where's my announcement.
I'm not getting married.
I don't even have any prospects.
No, none, zero.
I'm all alone.
But I did meet somebody...
have been really,
really needing to meet.
Me.
And it turns out...
I like me.
A lot.
With or without a husband.
And I say this, from
your older sister...
that...
if you are really in
love with Derrick...
and you can't imagine...
spending another
day without him...
then you two should
absolutely get married.
And I'm so happy for you.
But...
if you're making this
decision for any other reason...
sweetie, you're making the
biggest mistake of your life.
A really good friend once told me...
the magic...
the magic isn't
in getting married.
It's in staying married.
I don't know.
What are you saying?
You don't want to get married?
Do you?
I was just doing
this 'cause your mom said we had to.
Baby, we can wait until
after we graduate.
Maybe get to
know each other a little better.
Are you sure?
Yes. I am.
That's okay. Give me a kiss.
- I'm fine with that. I love you.
- I love you, too.
I feel so much better.
Let's get out of here.
Thank you.
I love you.
Hello. My name is Langston
Jefferson Battle Ill...
and I am running for
the United States Congress.
You met someone? You met yourself?
I had to say I was
introducing someone.
Whatever you need, we are here
for you. Right by your side.
Montana!
From way over there.
Way, way over there.
Wait for me, okay?
Not now, Mom.
Montana, wait.
Listen, Mom. I need a few
days. Weeks. Maybe even a month.
I can't give you that.
I can risk losing another
husband, but not my daughter.
I was proud of you in there.
That woman in there was the
woman I raised you to be.
Confident. Smart.
Independent.
A lady.
I'm sorry.
I was scared.
I put all that pressure
on you and your sister...
'cause I didn't want you to go
through five husbands like I did.
Do you mean that?
Of course I do.
And you know I do.
I don't know if I
ever told you this...
but your father...
was my first...
and only...
true love...
And I loved him...
until the day he died.
You're too young to
remember, Montana.
But every Sunday,
your father would let me sleep.
He'd rush downstairs...
to make pancakes.
He'd rattle his pots and pans
and carry on down there.
And then he'd yell up the stairs,
"Catherine, you come on down
here and eat these pancakes!"
I wouldn't move.
And then he'd come
and kiss me on my cheek.
So sweet.
And he'd say,
"Get up, baby. Come and eat."
That was thirty years ago, Montana.
And some Sundays...
I still close my eyes...
and I can smell those
pancakes like it was yesterday.
So, yeah.
Love does matter.
And when you find love...
and you will, baby...
No, no.
Don't ever let it go.
I love you, Mom.
I love you, too.
Mom.
Come on, let's go.
I just want to make you proud of me.
I don't think I'm
ever going to meet somebody.
Who knows? But you can have
really great sex while you look.
She can.
We get it, Gail. You like to bone.
Montana!
Did you enter the Publisher's
Clearing House Sweepstakes?
Who is that?
Montana!
Montana, I think the King of
Zamunda might be here to see you.
Oh. That's Quinton.
That is Quinton.
That's who you were supposed
to meet at the rehearsal?
That's the one that gave you...
Those diamonds are...
Those diamonds are real?
Montana!
Get ready, go down there.
No. I'm not.
What are you doing?
Gail, move.
Put the bracelet down.
Let her go.
Don't do something
we will all regret!
We can all retire off that bracelet!
Quinton!
I apologize for being late. I had an
event that ran longer than expected.
I hope I didn't ruin
anything for you.
Look. I thought
about what you said in Los Angeles.
I said a lot.
And I listened.
I want more than
extravagant trips and...
expensive gifts.
They're nice. They're really nice.
But...
I want a lifetime.
And as silly as it may sound, I'm not
going to settle for anything less.
And as silly as it sounds...
I don't think you should.
Thanks.
I can't see! I can't see!
That was super brave.
Thanks.
That was super stupid.
Uh, uh, uh!
I just...
I want a commitment. Real love.
He just wanted international
travel booty.
That man could have
intergalactic travel booty.
So who gave you this?
William.
Did William wrap that himself?
He can wrap a gift.
You going to open it?
No.
Okay, I will.
Hey, hey. She said she
doesn't want to open it.
That's why I'm opening it.
- You want it?
- Yes.
I would.
Don't you touch my...!
I'll open it!
God! I have had enough
drama for one night.
- You said you didn't want to open it.
- Stop it!
I'll open it.
Really.
Is William going through a bit
of a financial situation?
When we were seven, he proposed
to me with a toy ring...
and I laughed at him.
And he said, "Someday."
it's a plane ticket.
Is it? Hey, now.
Okay.
This is a plane ticket to France.
He wants you to marry a Frenchman.
Gail.
He was going to take his
girlfriend to Italy
for their one-year
anniversary and I said...
if it was me,
I would have chosen... France.
What date is the ticket for?
Today.
At 11:45 P.M.
Here we go, looking for a taxi!
That one!
Stop in the name of the law!
We need to get to the airport!
I'm off duty!
What are you doing?
Sir, you must!
Hey, my brother, I'm Calvin.
Let me help you with your bag.
I'm good, bro.
You can't go in there with
liquids and gels. You got any?
Cabbie, cabbie!
Stop!
Brother, you don't have
no lotion or nothing?
No, I don't.
So you out here for the
holidays just ashy?
You already dark-skinned.
Brother, we got a black President.
I am not sitting bitch!
I resent the implication!
I want the seat by the window!
Happy holidays, brother.
I couldn't hold him.
Drive, drive, drive!
How may I help you, sir?
I'm going to Paris.
I need your passport.
Here you go.
Calvin couldn't stop him.
I'll text Tanya and Cedric.
Here you go.
Actually!
These computers are always doing
something weird. Just one second.
Enjoying the holidays?
Is it snowing?
Paris sounds amazing.
Is the Eiffel Tower there?
I'm stuck here!
Where are you going?
I have to try!
Is there...?
Sorry, Mr. Wright, just one second.
Good luck! We love you!
I love you! Thanks, guys!
Text me Quinton's number!
- Really?
- Really.
Finally, I got it.
Here's your ticket.
Enjoy your trip to Paris.
Your gate is that way.
Have a safe flight, Mr. Wright!
What are you doing?
- Please, please, please!
- It's too late. I'm sorry.
William.
Montana?
William, oh, my God.
I just saw your plane leave
and I thought you were gone.
The agent entered
the wrong gate on my boarding pass.
But I thought you...
I thought you got your proposal.
I said no.
No husband?
No Taylor?
Not anymore.
The only baggage I've got is on
the way to France right now.
It's just me.
What are you trying to say
with the Cracker Jack box?
I don't understand.
Mo, listen.
I was standing alone
in my apartment.
And I realized...
why wasn't it finished?
It wasn't finished
because you weren't in it.
And I realized that little Cracker Jack
box ring wasn't gonna fit no more.
So...
I found one that would.
Montana Christina Moore...
for the second time...
and this time for all
the right reasons...
would you marry me?
Yes, yes, yes.
William.
After thirty days
and 30,000 miles
of searching the skies
for Mr. Right...
it turns out he was living
across the hall the whole time.
And with any luck,
he'll work the same job...
drive the same truck
and love the same woman...
for the rest of his life.
- We did it!
- Yes!
We did it.
I am so glad that's over.
Now I can finally get
back to my life.
Which starts this weekend.
I have a date with an
amazingly gorgeous man.
Oh!
Looks like I got a hot date, too.
Oh, Sam.
He works at the Renaissance.
Well, mine's the manager.
No.
You bitch! Why?
That's my man!
I had him first!
He's mine! I'm going to...
I fell in love again
and it happened in a minute
My eyes shot out like a fish out of
water and I'm jumpin' in it
Oh, I don't hold back
No, I don't hold back
I never stay within the lines
I don't hold back
No, I don't hold back
I'm gonna take what's mine
Oh, don't get scared for me
Just be prepared for me
'Cause I'm in love with love
In love
a big deal to my mother.
She loves weddings.
Especially hers.
And hers.
And hers.
And, well...
you get the picture.
But as easy as it was for
my mom to get married...
Whee!
My relationships...
have never been
cleared for takeoff.
I fell in love again
and it happened in a minute
My eyes shot out like a fish out
of water and I'm jumpin' in it
Oh, I don't hold back
No, I don't hold back
I never stay within the lines
I don't hold back
No, I don't hold back
I'm gonna take what's mine
Oh, don't get scared for me
Just be prepared for me
'Cause I'm in love with love
In love
When it comes to love
can't get enough
I'm not gonna change, I'm not gonna
change, I'm not gonna change my ways
'Cause I'm in love with love
When it comes to love
can't get enough
Can't get enough
I always wanted to be a
flight attendant. It's a great job.
You get to travel around the world,
meet interesting people
and see exotic places.
But that hasn't left
a whole lat of time for love.
My mom says it's
because I'm too picky.
I don't think I'm picky.
I just know what I don't want.
I don't want a man
with wandering eyes.
Or one that cares
more about his work than me.
I don't want a guy with
too much attitude.
Or too little ambition.
But I also don't want
to end up alone...
living in a house
full of cats...
smelling like soup.
And I don't want to spend
my entire life...
listening to my mother tell me
how she can find five husbands...
and I can't even find one.
But she won't be able
to say that for long.
A few months ago, I met this
amazing guy on a flight to Miami.
His name is Graham.
And I think he's the one.
"I've had a change
of business plans...
"...and it looks like I'll be spending
Thanksgiving at home in Chicago."
"I know it's short notice, but..."
Give me that.
"... If you can make it, I would love
for you to join me for a weekend...
"...you'll never forget."
"Love, Graham."
Graham is...
Someone I've been dating
for a few months.
- Wow. A few months? That's a record, Mo.
- Shut up.
Ta-da!
Montana! Buongiorno!
Buongiorno, Taylor.
It's zeppole. Italian donuts.
Thank you, but I'm
watching my figure.
Okay, but if you
change your mind, there's plenty.
- Aw!
- Ciao bella.
- Ciao bella.
- I'll get you some milk.
Sounds great.
She's so sweet.
What's with the Italian?
She planned a trip to Rome
for our one-year anniversary.
William!
How do you turn your oven off?
Oh! Okay, babe, I'll be right there.
I just put in a new oven.
Of course you did.
Are you ever going to finish that place?
- William?
- Hey?
Got it.
Aw, I'm coming.
- Okay, good.
- Okay.
I got to go.
Yes, you do.
Good luck in Rome.
If it were me,
I would have chosen Paris.
Hmm.
So romantic.
Good luck in Chicago.
You think just because someone...
sends me a rose, I'm just going
to fly off to whatever town he's in?
Absolutely.
According to my mother, you're not
a lady unless you're married...
on or before your 30th birthday,
and you're not a woman
until you've had at least two kids.
If you Te not a lady
and you Te not a woman...
you're like my best friend, Gail.
Warm nuts?
Oh, I'm so sorry.
I got your nuts all messy.
Sorry about that.
That all better?
Good.
Happy Thanksgiving. Welcome.
I could have been late, too.
Remember 9F?
Boston to Cleveland?
He invited me to his cabin in Vermont.
But I couldn't go.
Why? Because I had to
be at work on time.
- Happy Thanksgiving.
- Hi.
Why are you working?
I thought you were off.
I was. And now I'm not.
Hello.
Sam.
I misplaced my badge.
Gail, could you check your cleavage?
Trolling for men again, I see.
Hi. Welcome aboard.
So check this out.
A friend of my cousin's...
bought a penthouse
on top of the Water Tower
and he's having a party tonight.
Lots of celebrities.
Oprah's supposed to be there.
And Stedman.
How often does that happen?
I have a plus one...
it has your name on it.
Don't thank me, it's no problem.
Wow, Sam.
That sounds amazing.
I'd love to... but I can't.
A person would need a hell of a
reason not to party with Oprah.
Like dying or giving birth
or getting married.
Cranberry juice.
You're getting married?
Montana is not getting married.
If she was, being her best
friend, I'd know first.
- I'm not getting married.
- See?
Not yet.
See? Does Mr. Not Yet have a name?
Graham.
Graham Jackson.
5C, Philadelphia
to Chicago Graham Jackson?
Blue Label on the rocks,
seven figures a year Graham Jackson?
He could have invited
me for any holiday.
Christmas, New Year's Eve.
But Thanksgiving?
Thanksgiving feels like... forever.
- Yes, it does.
- You think so?
There'll be more than
turkey getting stuffed.
Such a hooker.
Shut up. Does your mother know?
No, and she won't
until I have a ring on this finger,
which may be this weekend.
I just have a feeling.
I'm sorry.
Be right there with your vodka.
Montana...
when my grandmother
was very sick, she gave me this.
I couldn't understand
what she was saying...
she was in and out of
consciousness, but...
I want you to have it.
It'll help you find true love.
Aw! Thank you, Sam.
That's so sweet.
I'm about to go.
But before I do,
I want you to have these.
Cranberry flavored
for the holidays.
Go get 'em, girl.
Thanks, Gail.
These waters
Can get a little busy
But I've got experience
Don't mind trekking
through the storm
Wow.
Graham, you've talked
about this for so long.
I can't believe I finally got to see it.
It's absolutely beautiful.
This is the first
time we're together
in the city where I actually live.
I wanted this to be special.
It is.
I wanted you to see a part of
me that most people don't.
Look at that water.
It just seems like it could go
on and on, forever and ever.
That's what I felt
the day you walked into my life.
And I was hoping...
that we could go on and
on and on and on. Forever.
Really?
And ever since we first met
I knew that I,
I knew I was ready baby
To take that dive
I'll be inside when
the tides are rolling baby
You'll be at my place tonight,
all night
All night, baby
I'm not afraid to try
And knew I, don't mind
playing in the rain
And I was hoping that I'd get to
Take that dive
It's raining and I don't mind
if I get wet, baby
Lovin' made you so wet,
your legs, your thighs
And ever since we first met
I knew that I
I knew I was
ready, baby
To take that dive
Sweetie?
We're here.
I thought we were
going to your house.
We were. But I got an
emergency phone call.
I have to fly to New York.
There's tons of paperwork
I have to look over.
I have to prepare for a meeting.
I'm sorry.
I booked you in the
best suite in town.
I'll make it up to
you when I come back, I promise.
I could help you.
I could come with you.
That's sweet.
Let me just take care
of this business.
I'll be back in a couple days.
Then it's just me and you.
- All right?
- Okay.
Yes?
Are you guys doing it?
No. If we were doing it,
I would not be answering my phone.
I would. So, how was it?
None of your business.
That bad, huh?
I didn't say it was bad.
You didn't say it was good.
It was good.
- Damn good.
- Then why are you on the phone?
If you must know,
Graham had an emergency...
business call and had to
fly out for an early meeting.
Being a gentleman...
he put me up at this amazing
hotel in one of the best suites.
Girl, please.
Montana, that man did not ask
you to fly all the way...
to Chicago on
Thanksgiving to insist...
that you stay in a hotel.
I smell a rat.
I don't want to hear it.
Hear what?
That he dropped you off
so he can dip his turkey neck
in another woman's gravy?
Graham is not seeing another woman.
- Prove it.
- How?
Go to his house and
see for yourself.
Gail, I am not
going over to that man's house.
Do you know how crazy
that would make me look?
Gail, I'm here.
- Where?
- Graham's house.
He came back and picked you up.
Sort of.
You went to his house uninvited?
You told me to.
I didn't think you'd do it.
Are you kidding me?
- What are you doing now?
- Going to his front door.
Umm-umm. Do not knock
on that man's door.
You'll look like a stalker.
Right now you just look desperate.
What am I supposed to do?
Go to the back.
Oh!
Okay.
What the hell was that?
Hello?
He's at the back door.
What do I do?
Do you see a trash can?
- Yeah. Why?
- Get in it.
Are you crazy?
I'm not getting in a trash can.
If I'm wrong about Graham...
- ...and he catches you...
- Hello?
At his house,
forget any future together.
Get in the can!
What are you doing?
I'm in the trash can.
Are you nuts?
You told me to.
Hello?
Montana?
I have to go.
Yes?
What are you doing now?
Looking thru his window.
Gail... it's beautiful.
Any panties on the floor?
No.
He's preparing for his meeting,
just like he said he was.
Gail was wrong.
Graham was alone.
And I was...
right where I wanted to be.
Sipping from the same mug.
Resting on the same rug.
Just the two of us.
And the kids.
And friends.
Toasting to our wonderful life.
What was that noise?
The sound of us toasting.
No, that is the sound of
somebody coming in the house!
Duck!
Un-break my heart
Say you'll love me again
Undo this hurt you caused
Oh my God.
When you walked out the door
And walked out of my life
Un-cry these tears
Montana? You want to talk about it?
Go away.
Hey.
You've been playing
that song all day.
Let's get something to eat.
I don't want to get dressed.
Okay, you don't have
to get dressed.
But you got to get out
of this apartment.
Okay?
I don't have to get dressed?
My cooking always cheers you up.
A little wine.
- Mo, you love avocado.
- All right.
Look at that.
Hey, vegan!
We are so excited. We wanted
you to be the first to know.
I wanted you to be
the first to know.
After me.
I'm engaged!
Derrick proposed
with a two-carat diamond ring!
I didn't get my first carat
until my third marriage.
Montana, does this single rose mean
you're not single anymore?
It's nothing.
Sheree's fiance is taking us
all out to dinner tonight.
I'm borrowing those earrings
I bought you for Christmas.
Oh, yes, honey. I should
have bought them for myself!
He's on track to break
the college record
for most receptions in a season,
maybe win a Heisman.
You know I'm happy for
you, right, Sheree?
But...
you're just a
sophomore in college.
You barely
know what you want to major in...
much less, who you want to
spend the rest of your life with.
Why now?
Why not now? He's a great guy.
And I don't want
to wait until I'm all old, like...
Like me.
I didn't mean it like that.
What do you think?
Yes? Fabulous? I hate them.
Mom's letting me wear
her wedding dress.
You can pick
whichever one you want.
Only one thing that would make
this the best wedding ever.
A bridesmaid again?
I can't go to
my little sister's wedding single.
I'll be the laughingstock
of my entire family.
If you need a man,
I can get you one.
Hey!
Don't embarrass me.
It's not a man I need...
it's a husband,
or a potential husband, in a month.
Marry Gail.
If she goes a week
without waxing her moustache,
they'll think it's Steve Harvey.
I'm serious.
Why is it so hard to
find the right guy?
Tell me about it.
Tell me about it.
A girl could have everything...
an MBA, a J-O-B, but no M-A-N.
That's because
men are intimidated by strong women.
I never tell guys
that I have a degree.
That's because you
don't have a degree.
Sam, you keep missing
the damn point.
I should give this back to you.
It's hopeless with me.
You won't show up single.
Give me your phone.
Uh, uh, uh!
Hang on. Now, look.
She hasn't got time
to meet someone new.
So why not revisit somebody old?
But I don't even know...
Picky is single.
If we're lucky, one of these guys
has blossomed into Mr. Right.
Let me see.
She hasn't talked
to any of these guys in years.
If she bumped into
one of them on a plane, she might.
How would I know if
they were traveling?
It's the holiday season...
everyone's traveling.
And when someone
wants to fly, what do they do?
Book a flight.
There's Tanya in ticketing.
I'm Tanya. Welcome to
TransAlliance. May I see your I.D.?
Frankie in the Frequent
Flyer program.
Thank you for choosing
TransAlliance.
I turned them on to my hook-up
at Louis Vuitton so
they owe me biggies.
There's Calvin at
curbside check-in.
Hi, I'm Calvin at curbside.
Welcome to TransAlliance,
a flight you can afford...
where your soul and bag
can be on one accord.
And there's Cedric in security.
First name, Cedric. Last name, take
everything out of your pockets!
I need your pockets
out of your pockets!
For the next few weeks,
any ex of yours
who flies anywhere, we'll know.
We just arrange your schedule
so you're on that flight.
First of all, this is the stupidest
idea ever. Secondly of all...
There's the degree.
Assuming you could find out
when these guys are flying...
which I doubt,
because it's your dumb-ass idea...
Gail!
These are all men you've dated
before, and it didn't work out.
So what is going to
make this any different?
Because this time, she's different.
Same action, same outcome.
New actions, new outcome.
Clearly, we have all
had too much to drink.
This is illegal. We can all get
fired, and we can go to jail.
Or we could come to the aid of
the sweetest...
and most romantically
deserving human being alive...
and help her find the truest
and fastest love of her life.
We have thirty days
and 30,000 miles.
To be brought up on federal charges.
To find me a husband.
I don't understand why you guys
think this is a good idea.
It's the 21st century.
You don't need a man to define you.
Everyone I know
is getting married and having kids.
So what?
I want someone to love me, too.
Someone who thinks I'm the best.
Who only sees me in the room.
I know it might sound corny
or unrealistic, but...
I know he's out there.
And I don't want to
wait any longer.
And you think you can
find him in 30 days?
Of course not!
Maybe?
Hey Sam.
- It actually worked.
- What worked?
Our plan.
He's flying from Los Angeles
to New York, connecting in Houston.
- Who?
- One of your exes.
Damon Diesel.
One second!
You've got to be kidding me.
Damon Diesel
could barely take care of himself,
much less a family.
Google him. He's produced three
number-one singles
in the last year.
And he's Essence?
"Bachelor of the Month".
He is looking for Mrs. Diesel.
Hey! I'm on the toilet!
Sam? I love you,
- but I'm not getting on that flight. Okay?
- Montana!
Oh, God, my mother
came over uninvited again.
I will jack you up!
I will jack you up hard!
I got to go.
Montana.
Honey, Mama's having a rough day.
All this planning for
your sister's wedding...
it's making me feel
like such a failure.
Mom, five marriages
doesn't make you a failure.
I wasn't talking about me.
I started thinking...
my youngest
daughter is marrying a wonderful...
handsome, athletic young man.
Yes, she is.
And I might not even be alive to
see my oldest do the same.
Anyway, we have to discuss your
sister's rehearsal dinner...
seeing you are a
maid of honor again.
I would love to talk about this,
but I have a flight to catch.
Why didn't you tell me
you had a flight to catch?
If you had called, I
would have told you.
Make sure you call me when you land.
I will call you whenever
I get to wherever I'm going.
- I love you.
- Yeah, I love you.
Sam? What's the flight number?
I fell in love again
and it happened in a minute
My eyes shot out like a fish out
of water and I'm jumpin' in it
Oh, don't get scared for me
Just be prepared for me
'Cause I'm in love with love in love
Taxi!
Taxi! Taxi!
William! William!
Sorry!
I have to get to the airport
fast... it's an emergency.
- Somebody's looking good.
- Yeah?
I almost didn't recognize you.
Some of us like to update our
image every decade or so.
This was the truck my father bought
before he started his business.
It's vintage.
I wasn't talking about the truck.
You want to get to the airport?
So what's the occasion?
Oh,
I'm meeting a friend in Houston,
then we're flying to New York.
Why fly all the way to Houston
to meet a friend
when New York is just an hour away?
He doesn't exactly know I'm meeting him.
It's a surprise.
Would this have anything to
do with Sheree's wedding?
It has nothing to do with it.
Okay, maybe it does. A little.
My parents were together
almost 40 years...
before my dad passed away.
He kept the same job.
Drove the same truck.
And stayed in love
with the same woman.
Every night at six, there was an
oven-cooked meal waiting for him.
The same one?
Poor woman.
You know, Mo...
the magic isn't
in getting married.
It's in the staying married.
Yeah.
William, I can't thank you enough.
Bye.
Wish me luck, okay?
I got my bag.
I know, I know.
- Your phone.
- I'm sorry. Bye.
Hey! Hey!
- Your earpiece.
- I'm sorry. You know me.
Okay, see you later!
- Thank you!
- Mo!
Mo! Your lipstick!
She's always forgetting something.
Cedric!
Nobody move! Back up! Nobody move!
Sorry. Excuse me, it's an emergency.
I have no life! Which gives
me all day to ruin yours!
Welcome aboard
TransAlliance flight 143.
Sam, I'm on the plane in a dress
I can barely breathe in.
But he's not here.
- Who?
- Damon Diesel. He's not on the flight.
He is.
No, he's not.
This is ridiculous.
I don't know how
you convinced me to do this,
but I'm leaving. I love you, bye.
I'd love to be the
stitches in that skirt.
Montana Moore.
Damon Diesel.
- Wassup?
- Wow. Not much.
You look great.
You're in first class?
That's the only way to ride.
Okay, I'll be sitting down.
Usually, I don't really
write about jewelry
It's foolery, But something
about the way you look on my arm
An arm on my neck
like you're my charm
So, so fresh when we
step out at midnight
Up to the spat we
chill and sit tight
How long are you in town?
Two or three days.
I have meetings and family to see.
How long are you in town?
Long enough.
Long enough for what?
Long enough for us to spend some
quality time, if I'm allowed.
You're allowed.
Great. Let's go.
Let's go.
After you.
I can't believe we
ran into each other. It's crazy.
I'm busy.
Damon Diesel.
What's up, baby?
Can I get you something to drink?
The usual.
A bottle of Chateau Margaux
'66, coming right up.
You should think way
larger than that.
- London, Dubai.
- Your check.
Thank you.
See you next time.
Damon, I should
probably get back to my hotel.
I have an early morning, and...
a girl does need
her beauty rest.
Real talk?
You could stay awake the rest of
your life and still be beautiful.
Thank you, Damon.
Being with you tonight...
you got a brother on
some till-death-do-we-part shit.
Don't laugh. Why are you laughing?
Damon. I've been
trying to reach you.
Janine, Montana. Montana, Janine.
Hi.
Janine and her
husband work with me at the label.
Can you call me when
you get a moment?
I want to wrap up a few things.
Have a good evening.
It was really nice
to meet you, Janine.
You, too.
Where were we?
To us.
So this is it.
Work hard, play hard, baby.
Clearly.
I want to show you something.
Check this out.
A little different
than the last time you saw me.
You think?
Hope you like it. Come on.
Okay, coming.
It's sexy, right?
Yeah. Wow.
Damon, you're doing big things.
I'm impressed.
I'm not getting in the hot tub.
You know you want to.
Maybe, but I'm not getting in.
Okay.
Will you stop acting silly?
Is that meant to be inviting?
Damon?
Damon! Damon, I know you hear me!
Who is that?
You said you weren't
seeing anybody.
That's Janine.
From the restaurant?
Damon!
Damon, you better open up!
It's your house.
Tell her you're busy.
- I can't.
- Why not?
This ain't my house.
It's hers. I can't afford this shit.
Damon, open this damn door!
- You can afford a Range Rover.
- Uh-uh.
You have a titanium
American Express card.
That's hers, too.
You said she's married.
She is. Sometimes she not.
I know you got that ho
from the restaurant there!
Who's she calling a ho?
Shh!
- I'm not shushing!
- You better shush.
She crazy.
I'll shoot you and that bitch,
'cause you know I'm crazy!
I told you. She crazy.
Crazy! She crazy.
Why are you doing this to me?
Open, open, open, open, open.
Open, open, open!
When she come through the door...
when she break the door
down, you don't want to be here.
Well, where should I be?
I am not getting on
that fire escape.
Damon, open this damn door!
Damon, I got something for you!
- Where is this bitch?
- Nobody's here.
Is Sam's
dumb-ass idea working?
Did he pop the question?
I'm on a fire escape!
I'll assume that's a no.
Anyway, bachelor number two...
is on the flight
in the morning from Atlanta to D.C.
You need to be at JFK in an hour
to catch the last
commuter flight out...
to make his morning
connecting flight.
You've now got...
sixty-nine...
I mean, fifty-nine minutes, honey.
You got fifty-nine minutes.
I'm looking for the bitch, too!
Bitch, where are you!
Could this get any worse?
Hey, Montana, it's your mother.
Listen.
Sheree decided to have a
bridesmaid slumber party.
We're all here in our pajamas
and we want you to come over.
All right, sweetie, I love you.
Uh-uh!
You know you don't
need that cookie. Sit down.
This is your pilot speaking.
The flight time today
to Reagan International Airport
is 1 hour, 40 minutes.
Sit back and enjoy the short flight.
Sir, may I offer you a blanket?
No, thank you.
Montana.
Langston.
Montana.
Curtis. Hi.
- Would you like a blanket?
- I'm okay.
Hey!
Two of m y exes are on the plane.
I know about Langston.
Who's the other guy?
Curtis.
He and Langston are both here.
I'll get Sam.
Curtis is here, too.
You said he got married.
I thought he did, but I don't think
he is now. No wedding ring.
None of the married guys I
date wear wedding rings.
It's tacky.
Go with Langston. He's running for
Congress, so he needs a running mate.
Curtis.
Langston.
You know Montana?
Yeah, we're old friends.
Flight attendants,
prepare the cabin for takeoff
You know, I'm running
for Congress now.
And I'm having dinner tonight
with some potentially major...
campaign contributors.
Would you know a young lady.
Gorgeous, intelligent...
that would be so
gracious as to join me?
If asked, I might.
Consider yourself asked.
Consider yourself answered.
Right over here, this is me.
Wow. Langston,
you've done very well for yourself.
Thank you. This is probably my
favorite room in the house.
I can see why.
Oh, you have a dog!
Montana, this is Juicy.
Juicy, this is Montana.
She's so cute. Can I pet her?
Juicy. Stop that, shame on you.
I'm sorry. She's jealous.
She likes to mark her territory.
- Sorry about that.
- I understand.
If you were around more,
Juicy wouldn't have these problems.
So my being around
more often would be just for Juicy?
Yes, strictly for Juicy.
I hope it's okay... I had my assistant
pick you out something to wear.
I'm assuming your
size is the same as I remember.
I hope so.
It's hanging in the bathroom.
Two doors down to the left.
Great. Okay.
Bye, Juicy. We're going to be friends.
I certainly hope so.
See you shortly.
Juicy, pee.
God, I love that Juicy.
Montana, allow me to introduce
you to Howard Donaldson...
and his beautiful wife, Estelle.
Mr. Donaldson is the owner and
founder of Donaldson Steel...
the largest contractor
in the Washington metropolitan area.
And who might this
stunning young lady be?
She is too pretty to be your date.
You got that right.
This is Montana Moore,
my very significant other...
who was gracious enough to
fly here to join us for dinner.
Well, young lady, I hope you're
prepared to withstand the heat...
which this coming
election will surely bring.
Montana comes from a long line of
flame-retardant women.
She'll be just fine.
All right. I got a
great table, let's go.
Flame retardant.
He surprised me.
How you doing, sir?
May I take your drink order?
I'll have a scotch,
single-malt, on the rocks...
and a Shirley Temple
with extra cherries for my wife.
That sounds good. I'll have
what the gentleman's having.
The lady will also have a
Shirley Temple, extra cherries.
Oh, no, actually, I'd like a...
it's okay, I got it.
A Shirley Temple, please.
Actually, would you excuse us?
Lam dying to show Montana...
the breathtaking
view of the atrium.
Excuse us.
Sweetheart, listen.
These are the kind of contributors
who want to know the candidate
they're investing in is a leader.
A take-charge type of man.
Now, if I sit there
and let you order your own drink,
then that would be
like you're leading.
Please, just bear with me.
I promise, when this
thing is over...
I'll take you anywhere and you can
order for the entire restaurant.
But can you just do me this solid?
For me?
Of course.
- I'll do it for you.
- Thank you.
You look great tonight.
Langston?
Your record in
the city council is impeccable.
Well, thank you.
If you're not elected to
Congress, it won't be because of...
insufficient financial support.
I like that sound.
Mr. Donaldson.
I can't tell you how
much this means to me. Us.
There is no reason you can't
do something for your people.
You could do something really great.
Historic, maybe.
I mean, we're talking the Obamas.
The Williams sisters.
And like Tiger Woods.
Well, if, uh...
you're referring to
the American people...
then, yes, I have
every intention of
making the American
people very proud.
Well, I was thinking specifically
of your people, the black people.
Well, I live in
Georgetown, so I guess
these... these would be my people.
And Tiger Woods lives in Florida,
so those would be his people.
Are you saying that where
Tiger Woods lives...
makes him irrelevant to
people of the same skin color?
You'd first have to
determine Tiger Woods' skin color.
He's black.
Well, I think...
what would make
Tiger Woods black...
would be his
passion for things, uh, that...
are related to the
African-American race as a whole.
Which he has not yet proven to have.
What I think would make
Tiger Woods black...
is the fact he drives an Escalade
and his daddy's name is Earl.
An Escalade? Why...
A daddy named Earl?
It was a joke.
Things were getting heavy
and I was just trying to lighten them up.
Juicy, no!
This is Langston.
Good evening, sir.
Yes, she is quite the funny lady.
I'm sorry?
Of course, I accept.
Thank you again, sir.
Good night.
That was Mr. Donaldson.
He just doubled his contribution.
Apparently your little
Tiger Woods joke...
was the highlight
of his evening.
Juicy! Go pee.
Then the dinner was a success.
Langston, we should celebrate.
Okay.
Sweetheart.
You're so pretty.
There's a saying.
Behind every great man...
there is an even greater woman.
I want that for you.
I want you to be greater.
But sometimes being greater...
means being quiet.
Hmm.
I always thought the saying
was, Beside every great man...
Beside, behind, between...
it's all semantics. The point is...
that if she is
to be great, wherever she is...
she must follow.
And he must lead.
Well, when I led...
I got you twice as much money.
- It's not just about money.
- What is it about?
I'll tell you, Juicy.
I'm running for office.
Did you just call me "Juicy"?
- Did I?
- Yeah, you did.
Well, I apologize.
I don't know how I
could confuse you two,
because Juicy knows how to obey.
Juicy, come!
See that?
You know what?
"New actions, new outcome."
Same asshole, same outcome.
You haven't changed a bit.
And I'm keeping the outfit and
the shoes. I earned them.
Get off, you little rat.
Juicy.
Juicy!
Hello?
Hey, it's me.
I didn't wake Taylor, did I?
No. Her grandma got sick,
so she went out of town to see her.
I'm sorry to hear that.
I hope she feels better.
- You doing anything?
- Not anymore.
Want to watch a movie?
Sure.
Great. Can you pick me up?
You live across the hall.
I'm not at home, silly.
I'm in Georgetown.
Hello?
William?
Hello?
Hello?
Sorry. I guess we got cut off.
No, I hung up.
Yeah, sure, of course.
I guess a 25-year
friendship doesn't give
me the right to call
you or expect you...
to drive less than an
hour when I'm stranded
at midnight in the crime
capital of the world.
Wait, stop, don't! I don't have any
money, or any real friends, either!
Stop!
So cold out there.
Yeah? Comfortable?
Why didn't you get one of your
friends to pick you up?
Oh, that's right. He
lives in Chicago.
Or was it Houston?
No, no, no. New York City, right?
I know this all seems
very silly to you.
I'm sorry you had a rough night.
It has been a very rough night.
God, it's cold in here.
Does "vintage" mean you don't
have any heat in this car?
I'm so cold.
Come sit next to me.
I'll keep you warm.
Thank you for coming.
You're welcome.
You give me hope that there's
still some good men out there.
Are you ever going to
finish this place?
- It'll be finished...
- When it's finished, I know.
I can't believe you're making me
watch a movie at two A.M.
On VHS.
All righty.
Our choices.
- Enter the Dragon.
- Uh-huh.
Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon.
Or The Last Dragon. Whoo!
You have Misery?
The Last Dragon?
There you go.
Get it started. I'll make us some drinks.
Mo?
What color in
the dining room? Cherry or Espresso?
Espresso.
Yeah, that's what I was thinking.
Wait. Is this our
high school yearbook?
Yeah. My mom was cleaning
the garage and found it.
I'm surprised your photo
didn't slide off the page.
You'd be walking around
with that activator...
Funny.
You must have forgot how you looked.
There wasn't a tube of gel in a
thousand miles that was safe.
Oh, my gosh. Look at our prom.
We were gettin' down.
No, I was getting dumped.
My date got jealous and left.
It's not my fault
she couldn't dance.
What was that song
we were dancing to?
I don't love her
I tried to tell myself
But you can see it in my eyes
So don't deny
I can't fool no one else
The truth is in the tears I cry
Cause if it isn't love
Why do I feel this way
Why does she stay on my mind
And if it isn't love
Why does it hurt so bad
Why does she stay on my mind
If it isn't love
Oh, my God.
I'll get us a drink.
This is for you.
- Thank you.
- Mmm-hmm.
Here we go.
This is a toast...
to us never dancing...
or dressing...
like that ever again.
Cheers.
Know what else my mom found?
Some DVD's? A couple romantic
comedies, hopefully?
Stop talking about a
black man's mama.
Remember this?
Please don't tell me
you still have that.
Paging Dr. William Wright.
If not for this, you wouldn't have
known you had a heartbeat.
You didn't know, either,
because you were
always trying to put
it on my booty.
You saying your booty
ain't got a heartbeat?
I don't think it does.
You don't?
Let me check.
Can you check it?
Oh, my God.
I can tell, young lady,
you're of African heritage.
Thank you.
I'm starting to hear something.
Be glad you know a doctor
who makes house calls.
Is that all you can make?
William...
Montana?
William?
Montana, we're here.
We sure are.
You still up for a movie?
Mo, you forgot...
She's always
forgetting something.
Ahh!
That was quite the dream you
were having, little girl.
You were sleeping so
peacefully, I decided
to clean that nasty
little kitchen of yours.
The way a woman keeps her kitchen
is the way she keeps her man.
I ought to know.
Mom...
in the interest of
me keeping my sanity...
I think we should establish
some clear-cut boundaries.
Boundaries.
After 74-and-a-half hours in labor,
struggling to give you life.
This is how you thank me?
Well, you're welcome.
And I am leaving.
Mom?
And do me a favor, Pig-pen.
That funky little attitude you got?
Don't bring that to
your sister's wedding.
We don't need it, okay?
Uh-huh.
Maybe I want to have a
funky little attitude.
Maybe because I'll have
someone of my own.
And I'm bringing
him to the rehearsal dinner.
What do you think about that?
Really, Montana?
You told your mother what?
I had to get her
off my back. You know how she is.
She got off your back, but a
10,000-pound gorilla jumped on.
You'll see.
- I'll see?
- You will.
- Montana.
- Weisha!
It's so good to see you.
Good to see you.
This is my good friend, William.
Hello.
For bridesmaid.
Again.
Try on.
Thank you, Weisha.
For the groom.
Try on.
Um, I'm not the groom.
But you're same size as groom.
Try on.
I need measurement.
This could have been you.
I proposed to you
and your answer was, "Eaugh!"
You proposed to me in elementary
school during recess...
"because you wanted my cupcake...
and the only way to get it...
was by giving me the toy ring
from your Cracker Jack box.
At least I offered
you a ring for it.
That's more than I can say for
the men you've dated since.
Touche. If I had known the
proposals would be so infrequent...
I would have accepted.
And then we'd be married.
Mo, you look amazing.
You don't look half bad yourself.
I have to get this.
Taylor.
How's your grandmother doing?
I miss you, too.
Got one... flight 1763 headed to
Houston, sitting in seat 3A.
Houston, we got a problem!
Move, move, move!
Feet can't touch the ground
And I can't hear a sound
But you just keep on
running up your mouth, yeah
Walk, walk on over there
'Cause I'm too fly to care
Oh, yeah
He's on his way to D.C. Right
there with my President.
This boy got some Frequent Flyer miles.
He's going to Miami.
Got another one, Sam,
on his way to Detroit. Motown!
Just one second.
One minute, please.
One second.
Don't let what they say
keep you up at night
And they can't detain you
'Cause wings are made to fly
And we don't let
nobody bring us down
No matter what you
say, it won't hurt me
Don't matter if I fall from the sky
These wings are made to fly
She like light-skinned dudes?
I got Leo DiCaprio up here.
Do her husband have to be a man?
Now is not the time to get
down on yourself, Montana.
In a week, maybe.
Thank you.
Don't mention it.
Ohh!
Taylor?
Montana. What a...
Ho-ho-ho.
Surprise?
How's your grandmother?
William is better looking.
And he's a great guy.
And she's here being a two-timing...
Whore.
- Montana.
- Taylor.
I know this looks really bad.
But what you don't know is
me and William broke up.
It's a long story. I'd appreciate
it if you don't mention it.
You know how it is when you break up.
The wound's still open.
Sure, yeah.
Thank you.
Could you get me a hot tea?
Two sugars, no cream.
Ciao!
Flight 901 is headed to New Mexico.
Feliz Navidad.
Got another one, Sam, 506...
coming straight
to Los Angeles. You want him?
Do you mind if I...
Sorry, I'm really sorry.
Sorry.
No, Gail, there's
four days left before the wedding.
I'm just going to get
some rest and...
hop on the first
flight in the morning.
Thanks for trying.
Yeah. I love you, too.
Okay. Bye.
Montana Moore.
Do you know what time it is?
It's ten o'clock in L.A.
it's one A.M. in Baltimore.
I know.
I'm sorry, I just thought
maybe you might want to...
you know...
talk.
About?
Come on, William.
How long have we
known each other? You can tell me.
What are you talking about?
I'm talking about...
Montana.
Taylor.
I was thinking about you, too.
Oh, you got another call.
Taylor, don't do that.
And Merry Christmas to you, too.
Bye.
What happened to the Italian guy?
What are you working on?
Just trying to figure things out.
I like this little thing here.
Oh. Yeah?
Anybody in a holiday spirit?
Come on, it's open mike.
A cottage small is all I'm after
Not one that's spacious and wide.
A house that's filled...
What are you guys whispering about?
Hey, I'm singing right now.
Sam e people like the high life.
I like the low life.
Sounds corny and seedy,
but yes, indeed-y,
Give me the simple life
You know? Okay.
Bravo, bravo. That was amazing.
Quinton!
Montana.
Oh, I'm so embarrassed.
Oh, please. Don't be.
You were wonderful.
- Really?
- Well, no.
It's so good to see you.
You, too. I'm so pleased
you still remember me.
Of course I remember you. You
were on my route for over a year.
L.A. to New York.
Let me see if I can remember.
Columbia graduate,
top of your class, of course.
Hobbies-racquetball,
skiing and art.
I guess it's obvious how much I enjoyed
talking to you during our flights.
Luckily, there was always an empty
seat next to you so we could talk.
It wasn't luck.
I paid for both seats.
You didn't.
Of course.
Excuse me.
I have no idea
what you just said, but you don't...
Please. I insist.
Let's go have a drink.
Okay, if you insist.
So you've been a maid
of honor nine times.
I should call
the Guinness Book of World Records.
More like Ripley's
Believe It or Not.
It could have been ten, actually...
but my cousin called off her
third wedding the day before.
So it's really nine
with an asterisk.
Yeah, I know.
As you requested, Mr. Jamison.
Oh, Quinton, this is too much.
You can never have too much of a good
thing. Besides, it's on the house.
You work for the hotel?
I own the hotel.
This hotel?
Yes.
It's a lovely day for going nowhere
It's a lovely day for being in love
It's a lovely day
Feel like chasing the clouds away
To a perfect place I'm dreaming of
It's a lovely day for going nowhere
Have you ever imagined
what it would feel like...
to take off a year
and travel the world?
What woman hasn't?
But without the means or the time...
it remains just that,
a thought, a dream.
So if you were given the means...
would you find the time?
I don't know what you mean.
Oh.
You think this sunrise is beautiful?
Wait till you
see the sunrise in the Serengeti.
Or the view from the top
of the Eiffel Tower.
We could shop in Milan.
Cruise the Greek Isles
on a private yacht.
Wow, that... that sounds incredible.
Quinton, I'm so flattered.
I don't know what to say.
Say... "I accept your invitation."
You mean... your proposal?
If that's what you want
to call it, then yes.
What do you want me to call it?
I'm taking time off
to travel the world
and I'm asking you to join me.
Montana...
if you thought
I was talking about marriage
I've tried it, twice...
and all it did
was ruin two very good friendships.
Listen.
If marriage is what
you need, you should
find someone willing
to give you that.
But if passion and
adventure are what you want,
you'll never want it again.
I'm passing through D.C.
in a couple of days
on my way to Rome, then London...
and then to Greece.
I'll have my assistant book you
a ticket to all three places,
just in case.
Okay.
If you're going to be in D.C...
I'd really like you to come
to my sister's rehearsal dinner.
If won't be anything fancy,
like you're used to, but...
we could talk about it then.
Okay.
Now you get some rest
and think about it. Yes?
Okay.
It's been a great night.
Now I realize why it's
so hard to find the perfect guy.
Maybe he just doesn't exist.
From the first time we met
Saw a glow I can't forget
Felt the sun rise and set
In your eyes
I knew that I wanted
You near me
Is it love I feel?
Tell me, is it real?
Is it love, please tell me
Now
What you doing?
About to
get ready for the rehearsal dinner.
It's your mailman.
From your mailbox.
You didn't have to do that.
And that's from me.
Early Christmas gift.
Thanks.
It'll help get your
mother off your back.
That's no longer a problem.
Tonight at Sheree's
rehearsal dinner,
after my sister
introduces her soon-to-be husband...
I'll make an
introduction of my own.
What's so funny?
You're turning into your mother.
No. I'm just realizing that maybe
fairy tales don't come true.
We weren't all lucky enough
to have parents like you...
that ate dinner every night
together for 40 years.
I never said my
parents were perfect.
They went through
it just like any other couple.
But when they took those
vows, they meant it.
My mom loved my dad.
And my dad loved her back.
Well, my mom loved my dad.
And then she loved another man.
And another man and another man.
People get married and divorced.
That's just what people do.
You spent your life being your own
woman. Why change now?
Who said I wouldn't be my own woman?
I just would really like to
be somebody else's, too.
Somebody's? Or anybody's?
You know what? William...
why don't you save your
really great relationship advice
for someone
who really needs it? Like Taylor...
when she's kissing some
Italian dude at 30,000 feet.
Wow.
That's my cue.
Merry Christmas, Mo.
I thought you should know!
Thank you, I know.
William?
I'm sorry.
Montana, it's your mother.
I have told everybody
about your announcement...
so don't let me down!
Good evening.
As you all know,
my youngest daughter...
is marrying a
handsome young man...
from Rhoda Island.
Rocky Mountains.
What are you doing here?
Same as you, just being nosy.
This is to welcome
him to the family.
And give him a last
chance to back out.
But before I bring you
my youngest daughter...
I'd like to present my oldest...
who has an announcement
that is lovely...
and long overdue.
I give you Montana!
Montana, come up.
Come up here.
So, um...
...I have an announcement..
...as I am sure you are all aware.
The tricky thing about
announcements is...
you need to have
something to announce...
in order for it to
be an announcement.
What is she doing?
I don't know.
So, here it is.
Friends... family...
fellow Americans.
Langston.
Langston?
Montana, I was flipping
through the newspaper...
and saw the notice
for your sister's wedding.
Congratulations.
You look ravishing.
Thank you.
- Montana...
- Who is he?
I thought about what you said.
You were right.
A woman can lead.
Under the right
circumstances, of course.
One of which is a campaign brunch
next week, with a very
influential senator.
A senator.
This is to beside...
behind...
and to nothing...
coming between us.
Montana...
would you...
Oh, yes, she will!
No, I won't.
- Yes, you will.
- I won't.
- Will.
- Won't.
What's gotten into you?
What's gotten into you?
You don't even know this man.
- Hi.
- Hello. How are you?
Fine, thank you.
You're just going to marry me off
to the first person you see?
Unbelievable.
This is a man...
who I would...
never marry.
I wouldn't even vote for you.
I don't trust black
Republicans, I'm sorry.
I'm actually a Libertarian.
You know, I spent the
last thirty days...
looking for somebody, anybody...
to come here tonight.
So I could... fit in.
Be part of the club.
So all of you would say,
"We love you, Montana."
"You did it. We're so proud of you.
You're a lady."
But...
marriage doesn't
make you a lady...
any more than standing in
a garage makes you a car.
That's a weird analogy.
So, um...
where's my announcement.
I'm not getting married.
I don't even have any prospects.
No, none, zero.
I'm all alone.
But I did meet somebody...
have been really,
really needing to meet.
Me.
And it turns out...
I like me.
A lot.
With or without a husband.
And I say this, from
your older sister...
that...
if you are really in
love with Derrick...
and you can't imagine...
spending another
day without him...
then you two should
absolutely get married.
And I'm so happy for you.
But...
if you're making this
decision for any other reason...
sweetie, you're making the
biggest mistake of your life.
A really good friend once told me...
the magic...
the magic isn't
in getting married.
It's in staying married.
I don't know.
What are you saying?
You don't want to get married?
Do you?
I was just doing
this 'cause your mom said we had to.
Baby, we can wait until
after we graduate.
Maybe get to
know each other a little better.
Are you sure?
Yes. I am.
That's okay. Give me a kiss.
- I'm fine with that. I love you.
- I love you, too.
I feel so much better.
Let's get out of here.
Thank you.
I love you.
Hello. My name is Langston
Jefferson Battle Ill...
and I am running for
the United States Congress.
You met someone? You met yourself?
I had to say I was
introducing someone.
Whatever you need, we are here
for you. Right by your side.
Montana!
From way over there.
Way, way over there.
Wait for me, okay?
Not now, Mom.
Montana, wait.
Listen, Mom. I need a few
days. Weeks. Maybe even a month.
I can't give you that.
I can risk losing another
husband, but not my daughter.
I was proud of you in there.
That woman in there was the
woman I raised you to be.
Confident. Smart.
Independent.
A lady.
I'm sorry.
I was scared.
I put all that pressure
on you and your sister...
'cause I didn't want you to go
through five husbands like I did.
Do you mean that?
Of course I do.
And you know I do.
I don't know if I
ever told you this...
but your father...
was my first...
and only...
true love...
And I loved him...
until the day he died.
You're too young to
remember, Montana.
But every Sunday,
your father would let me sleep.
He'd rush downstairs...
to make pancakes.
He'd rattle his pots and pans
and carry on down there.
And then he'd yell up the stairs,
"Catherine, you come on down
here and eat these pancakes!"
I wouldn't move.
And then he'd come
and kiss me on my cheek.
So sweet.
And he'd say,
"Get up, baby. Come and eat."
That was thirty years ago, Montana.
And some Sundays...
I still close my eyes...
and I can smell those
pancakes like it was yesterday.
So, yeah.
Love does matter.
And when you find love...
and you will, baby...
No, no.
Don't ever let it go.
I love you, Mom.
I love you, too.
Mom.
Come on, let's go.
I just want to make you proud of me.
I don't think I'm
ever going to meet somebody.
Who knows? But you can have
really great sex while you look.
She can.
We get it, Gail. You like to bone.
Montana!
Did you enter the Publisher's
Clearing House Sweepstakes?
Who is that?
Montana!
Montana, I think the King of
Zamunda might be here to see you.
Oh. That's Quinton.
That is Quinton.
That's who you were supposed
to meet at the rehearsal?
That's the one that gave you...
Those diamonds are...
Those diamonds are real?
Montana!
Get ready, go down there.
No. I'm not.
What are you doing?
Gail, move.
Put the bracelet down.
Let her go.
Don't do something
we will all regret!
We can all retire off that bracelet!
Quinton!
I apologize for being late. I had an
event that ran longer than expected.
I hope I didn't ruin
anything for you.
Look. I thought
about what you said in Los Angeles.
I said a lot.
And I listened.
I want more than
extravagant trips and...
expensive gifts.
They're nice. They're really nice.
But...
I want a lifetime.
And as silly as it may sound, I'm not
going to settle for anything less.
And as silly as it sounds...
I don't think you should.
Thanks.
I can't see! I can't see!
That was super brave.
Thanks.
That was super stupid.
Uh, uh, uh!
I just...
I want a commitment. Real love.
He just wanted international
travel booty.
That man could have
intergalactic travel booty.
So who gave you this?
William.
Did William wrap that himself?
He can wrap a gift.
You going to open it?
No.
Okay, I will.
Hey, hey. She said she
doesn't want to open it.
That's why I'm opening it.
- You want it?
- Yes.
I would.
Don't you touch my...!
I'll open it!
God! I have had enough
drama for one night.
- You said you didn't want to open it.
- Stop it!
I'll open it.
Really.
Is William going through a bit
of a financial situation?
When we were seven, he proposed
to me with a toy ring...
and I laughed at him.
And he said, "Someday."
it's a plane ticket.
Is it? Hey, now.
Okay.
This is a plane ticket to France.
He wants you to marry a Frenchman.
Gail.
He was going to take his
girlfriend to Italy
for their one-year
anniversary and I said...
if it was me,
I would have chosen... France.
What date is the ticket for?
Today.
At 11:45 P.M.
Here we go, looking for a taxi!
That one!
Stop in the name of the law!
We need to get to the airport!
I'm off duty!
What are you doing?
Sir, you must!
Hey, my brother, I'm Calvin.
Let me help you with your bag.
I'm good, bro.
You can't go in there with
liquids and gels. You got any?
Cabbie, cabbie!
Stop!
Brother, you don't have
no lotion or nothing?
No, I don't.
So you out here for the
holidays just ashy?
You already dark-skinned.
Brother, we got a black President.
I am not sitting bitch!
I resent the implication!
I want the seat by the window!
Happy holidays, brother.
I couldn't hold him.
Drive, drive, drive!
How may I help you, sir?
I'm going to Paris.
I need your passport.
Here you go.
Calvin couldn't stop him.
I'll text Tanya and Cedric.
Here you go.
Actually!
These computers are always doing
something weird. Just one second.
Enjoying the holidays?
Is it snowing?
Paris sounds amazing.
Is the Eiffel Tower there?
I'm stuck here!
Where are you going?
I have to try!
Is there...?
Sorry, Mr. Wright, just one second.
Good luck! We love you!
I love you! Thanks, guys!
Text me Quinton's number!
- Really?
- Really.
Finally, I got it.
Here's your ticket.
Enjoy your trip to Paris.
Your gate is that way.
Have a safe flight, Mr. Wright!
What are you doing?
- Please, please, please!
- It's too late. I'm sorry.
William.
Montana?
William, oh, my God.
I just saw your plane leave
and I thought you were gone.
The agent entered
the wrong gate on my boarding pass.
But I thought you...
I thought you got your proposal.
I said no.
No husband?
No Taylor?
Not anymore.
The only baggage I've got is on
the way to France right now.
It's just me.
What are you trying to say
with the Cracker Jack box?
I don't understand.
Mo, listen.
I was standing alone
in my apartment.
And I realized...
why wasn't it finished?
It wasn't finished
because you weren't in it.
And I realized that little Cracker Jack
box ring wasn't gonna fit no more.
So...
I found one that would.
Montana Christina Moore...
for the second time...
and this time for all
the right reasons...
would you marry me?
Yes, yes, yes.
William.
After thirty days
and 30,000 miles
of searching the skies
for Mr. Right...
it turns out he was living
across the hall the whole time.
And with any luck,
he'll work the same job...
drive the same truck
and love the same woman...
for the rest of his life.
- We did it!
- Yes!
We did it.
I am so glad that's over.
Now I can finally get
back to my life.
Which starts this weekend.
I have a date with an
amazingly gorgeous man.
Oh!
Looks like I got a hot date, too.
Oh, Sam.
He works at the Renaissance.
Well, mine's the manager.
No.
You bitch! Why?
That's my man!
I had him first!
He's mine! I'm going to...
I fell in love again
and it happened in a minute
My eyes shot out like a fish out of
water and I'm jumpin' in it
Oh, I don't hold back
No, I don't hold back
I never stay within the lines
I don't hold back
No, I don't hold back
I'm gonna take what's mine
Oh, don't get scared for me
Just be prepared for me
'Cause I'm in love with love
In love