Balls to the Wall (2011) Movie Script

Hi, I'm Lewis Gardner.
Ben is my best friend Camelina
since the eighth grade.
People always thought Ben
cowardly way ...
but not when
really got the bug.
Young lady, where do you go?
Come here.
WOMEN'S CLUB
What would you do for love?
Some guys buy flowers,
others buy jewelry.
Musician Tommy Lee's name tattooed
girlfriend on his instrument.
Ben?
He dances all night long.
What is very different from today
extremely boring in our work.
In Worldtec Worldwide
on the beautiful San Fernando Valley.
Eight hours a day
Hell on earth.
Find anything?
Only some spyware ...
M43 trojan program ...
some pop-ups ...
Wow!
Some pictures of the naked man's wife.
How wonderful! She is sexy as a
large piece of cottage cheese, man.
- This will work on emails.
- You did not say that.
But I will get to you.
Happy hour later?
No, I have to do some things
with Rachel.
You are excusing myself every day, man.
What is happening?
It offers snacks for 50 cents
and drink for two dollars?
Not for nothing, but I thought
on how it goes when you're married?
I will tell you, I will be the
sad and lonely guy behind the bar.
But you, you will be like a dog
on a leash, a perfect stooge.
Camelina!
Yes?
Sadie is waiting.
Okay.
Ben was a talented guy.
He had goals, dreams, desires.
But along the way, something ...
Something went wrong.
Sadie made the "geek"? He?
Break off a little.
Knead.
Sadie is leaving
eating grass again?
No, I would not,
Miss. Watson.
Good.
Now get outta here.
They say that pain and suffering
form great artists.
If this is true,
Ben would be a Picasso.
Always drawing cute things
for his girlfriend Rachel.
And your drawings?
You never drew.
I drew a thing today.
It's my boss.
Here you are.
He saw the pentagram?
Represents the third chakra and that it
my blood is dripping from her teeth.
Now a bit of family history
of Camelinas.
Ben was eight
when his father left.
His mother faced the change
very well.
Say, after wasting
ten years with that old ...
she was determined to make
for lost time.
Ben!
- This is the uncle range.
- That's right.
It rhymes with "bed".
That's where we go.
Almost every night, there appeared some new
male member of the family of Ben ...
in your home.
Had Uncle Adam.
Uncle Andy.
Uncle Arthur.
Uncle Al
Uncle Antoine.
And the bizarre pirate homeless.
His mother had to find that several figures
the father would feel better ...
about the fact of not having a father
of truth.
But what counts is the intention,
is not it?
Ben said that most of them
was pretty cool.
Although some have left the house
the smell of coconut oil body.
But none has changed the lives of Ben,
as did Uncle Sven.
You know what, Bill?
Ben.
Whatever.
Let me give you some advice.
If you want to attract the kiddies, the track
dance is the perfect place for that.
Nothing is more provocative than
a nice ass in action.
Got it?
But I'm allergic to cats, Uncle Sven.
Let it go.
You will return the panties
my mother?
Probably not.
Uncle Sven's words haunted
their dreams.
And they could not stop thinking
that bow tie.
Sven!
Okay, he did not understand right
what Uncle Sven was saying.
But that would change one day.
- Hi, love.
- Hi
I brought your favorite wine.
- And more brides porn magazines.
- Legal.
Ben, this is Clarissa, organizer
wedding of Kingsley Estates.
Hi, very pleased.
- Come, sit here.
- What did I miss?
The Clarissa was telling me the party
in the Rose Garden.
Rose Garden?
What a perfect!
It would be perfect.
Already chosen the date?
Preferably in July this year.
Unfortunately, there is no day
available for the next year.
Unless ...
Just be a cancellation!
For three months from now, actually.
What lucky.
The day is ours.
I think we should know
the first place.
Do not think it would be a good idea?
But someone may take that day
between now and the day of his visit.
You do not want this, Ben.
We do not want this, Ben.
So, you can dial.
Thank you, dear.
Well, what would it cost?
The Rose Garden takes a minimum of
two hundred guests, so ...
I hope you have many friends.
As long as suppliers, 18%
the service, taxes ...
I would say ...
49 000, $ 998.
It is possible, is not it?
It is less than 50 000.
Is not it?
Will win many miles ...
the credit card.
It is the Rose Garden.
The Rose Garden?
$ 50,000, wow!
How will you afford it, Ben?
I want to draw stories
comics.
You earn some money with it, is not it?
I'm kidding.
Would think something as important
the hands of a moron like you?
Of course I'll play the wedding.
Really?
Dad, thank you.
I do everything for my little girl e. ..
by the marriage of my little girl.
What will we play?
The marriage of Rachel.
All fifty thousand dollars.
That's it?
I easily spend twice that.
Good.
How so? What?
I said it would seek ice.
I got it.
It is on my own.
The ice does not pay, you idiot.
Why will not both?
It's funny how a person's life
can change in an instant.
That's exactly what happened to Ben
that night.
Thank you for offering to pay
marriage, Mr. Matthews.
You're welcome.
I always thought she would marry
with Cole.
But life is full of disappointments.
There is, Ben?
- So ...
- Why do we still have that photo?
Talk about your work.
I'm still in the department of T.I.,
still in Worldtec Worldwide.
What exactly does this company?
The company's mission is to seek
opportunities for growth and profit ...
in emerging markets, explore
new paradigms financial e. ..
I think I dozed off
in the middle of boring answer, Ben.
Thirty years ago
I am a financial consultant.
Ten hours a day,
five days a week.
I only see numbers.
Figures on numbers, numbers.
So I take almost half a bottle
of whiskey every night.
You know what helps me stay
drugs in the office?
It has open bar in the meeting room?
The notion of duty.
Of responsibility.
I had a family to support,
and soon you'll have yours.
Rachel is pregnant?
For God's sake, no.
I know you're young.
Must have a lot of crazy dreams ...
and think, "I will be in this job
my rock band until it succeeds. "
- I do not have ...
- Forget it!
99.9% of Americans kill themselves
working nine to five ...
five days a week
fifty weeks a year.
Why should you be different?
It would not be.
Exactly.
I'll wait in the car. Get some
lottery tickets in the output.
Okay.
BERNIE NILES,
BEWARE OF THE OWNER
Hi, Bernie.
- It's cleaner.
- Yes
Wait, listen,
let's see if I understand it, Matthews.
You already owe me two thousand dollars.
And now you want to catch
and borrow more?
50 000.
I thought,
as I have I owe you ...
What would be 50 000, is not it?
But you know what?
Your help would be welcome now.
- I am moving in the decor ...
- This here? Right.
- Just drag here. That's it.
- Ready.
I just need to cover that here.
What do we do?
This course?
That's it. Wow that side,
the corner as well.
Opens everything right.
Great job.
Hello, Bernie!
Why are you moving
in decorating now?
My friend Louie is here.
I know that Louie?
Yes, yes ...
Say "hi" to Louie!
Bernie, Bernie!
We can solve this.
- Is it?
- Now we have a story.
Stand up. I am ashamed
for you.
Come on.
There you are.
At last arrived.
You brought your accessories, good.
Come on.
I said, are you prepared?
- Yes!
- I did not hear, are prepared?
That's right, girls. I'm Candy Lane,
and I want to introduce you to ...
the newest member
the men's room.
He is dark as chocolate.
He is.
And it's light as a feather.
- Why the clothes?
- Clothing?
- The number of "Everyman."
Good!
- Looking for Mr. Matthews.
- Who?
The Ice Man!
Go there!
Oh yes, it's the debut of the Iceman.
You'd better prepare.
Oh, it's his first time!
He does not know what to do.
He's shy.
He's shy.
This is part of the show, right?
Oh, it looks like a big baby.
Someone wants to give colinho for this baby?
Who wants to be his mama?
What are you doing here still?
Do not know how to disguise this guy silly
ever?
No, Dad, that's okay.
I found the "Ice Man"
the new guy.
He is on stage now.
Excuse me.
I'm Charlemagne.
I'm the ice man.
Sorry for the delay.
So who the hell is that idiot?
I have no idea.
He had a few bags of ice.
You want to see bags of ice?
- I'll show you a bag of ice.
- No.
- You want to see?
- Please, no!
Take it all!
It has a beautiful swing.
Yes, he has.
He will show his swagger.
Move it!
Take it all!
Move, you jerk!
Take it all!
Take it all!
Come closer!
In tennis, tennis.
Why are you crying so much?
- Strange.
- Yeah, Chad is great here. Not there.
He is good.
Yes, yes, I know.
So I brought you here.
You said you did not know.
I know, I said.
Because I did not want to influence.
Yes, I understand.
That's it!
A round of applause
for the Iceman!
Thanks for the encouragement, the owner.
My name is Maureen.
I give you $ 300 if I lick
like a lollipop.
Thank you.
Excuse me.
I came here, and I want to receive.
I'll be backstage.
Go back a little, just a little.
Thank you.
This is Ben Camelina,
My future son.
Ben volunteered
to ...
paying my debt,
doing his show for you.
- I do not know ...
- Bernie, heard the women down there?
- They loved it.
- True, they loved it.
"True, they loved it."
You will work from eight to midnight
Tuesdays to Saturdays.
Thank you, Bernie.
You can leave.
You made a great success.
They loved it.
He had one that loved it.
Hey, Ben.
So, it will be like ...
every dollar you earn,
will deposit in an account ...
an application will be an investment.
With his talent and my knowledge
Financial ...
we have $ 50,000 in no time.
- I thought you already had the money.
- I have. I have a lot of money.
But it's all invested.
In insurance, and stuff ...
but it is not accessible, and I am
struggling now.
So ...
I will not.
But it's not for me.
It is by Rachel, you know?
And the wedding.
Sure, you had agreed
to pay.
By tradition, the father plays the wedding.
But the reality is
a little different now.
This is not happening.
This visit to the club Male Locker Room
did not happen.
So let's see what we will talk
before returning home.
I will not lie to Rachel Matthews.
Ben, you're getting married.
Better get used to it.
We arrived.
- Where is everybody?
- Thanks for forcing me to make room ...
- To its customers all night.
- We were worried sick.
Ben, what happened?
Us ..
spent in a bar ...
to celebrate.
Celebrate?
Celebrate what?
My promotion.
Have you been promoted?
So to say that you will work
is not much more now, Ben?
Will work late.
Come on, tell everything to them.
- The ice melted.
- Okay.
That's it!
A round of applause
true for the Iceman.
I know you want
heat it in winter.
He charged extra for these breasts?
Hello, men.
See who's here.
Must be the night of amateur again.
Good job there, the Iceman.
Thank you, dear.
'm Hot, do what?
You call that dancing?
To have a juggernaut moves
more graceful.
And to think I left the club Rancho
Men to work with you.
You're so over.
Chad!
- Does anyone have a pair of scissors?
- Give my hair.
The Big Chad has no effect
about people.
It is not his problem.
You-
Yeah, you.
Novato.
Guess what. I need a partner,
and I will come in five minutes.
You just enter university
of "onoma-Chad."
Think you can?
I have the answer for you.
Neither the stick.
I'm not doing that.
Ben relaxes.
Let's relax.
- Could you please stop?
- Okay.
You need to pretend to be a girl.
- Pretend that I am girl?
- At least, think like a girl.
Need to contact
with his feminine side.
Women love to dance,
know the moves.
You know how crazy men
heterosexuals and lesbians.
You need to connect
with inside your vagina.
What will you do with it?
I'm doing this for a reason.
For inspiration.
- So, smashes.
- Well, girl!
Who is ready
to participate in the show?
The time is the lucky bride,
Jessica Smith of Reseda!
You can sit.
Are you ready to be saved, dear?
And I'm not talking in church,
I'm talking on our firefighters.
Applause for Chad!
And the newest member
the men's room.
- The Common Man.
- What a delight!
Jessica, Jessica!
Never steal my attention.
You're just mad because she thought
I was a good kisser.
Shut up.
Rachel always said I was a good kisser.
Whenever ... Ouch!
It's hot here.
I'm so wet,
who is wet?
You heard the cries of them, Ben?
As we gain?
$ 159 in three minutes of work.
I feel like a crack dealer.
Thank you.
Great job, kid.
It is best to Chad careful, if you want
remain the number one here.
There is room for a "number" here,
"Common Nerd."
So it's better to learn
to count to two.
Old rascal, Big Chad does not need
to count.
Think is good enough to win
the "Strip-Luz-Pope"?
"Strip-pope" what?
Strip-pa-pa-Luz.
It's just the biggest event that there
strippers for men.
That's right.
And I already have "c" in the name of a champion.
"Chad".
Change a few letters,
I have the name of a champion.
It is, believe me.
His name also has "c" of pity.
Has it?
- $ 69,000.
- No!
Ben ...
- No!
- We would pay the whole match ...
- With the money of this award.
- It's a great idea, Matthews.
We appear on national television,
maybe you do not see Rachel.
Well, the cake will cost
two thousand dollars.
Are you kidding?
It is covered with gold
or something?
It has four floors.
Can not be reduced to two floors,
and make everyone eat less?
Jack, people today get married once,
or two. Three at most.
But we want the wedding Rachel has
perfect, at least the first.
Now, I want to listen
the band have chosen.
In fact, an orchestra is well known,
they are amazing.
Listen.
You know I love it.
You are close
my sleeping dragon.
If you wake him up, I'm not responsible
for their actions.
- Do you need help, my friend?
- I do not need, Chad.
It costs me nothing, really.
You do well in heavy lifting.
The girls love men spotted.
Great men like Chad.
You know Chad loves the Great?
Money.
And when someone takes the money that should
Chad is the Great, he gets angry.
Then, he takes revenge.
Who is your helper now?
I think someone needs
feel the weight of Chad.
Who is the assistant now?
That was good.
What was I doing?
Hi, red alert.
Are you serious?
Do not move.
Can take.
I'll be back.
My God!
Jesus!
Wait, do not move.
I'm going.
Are you okay?
Oh, there's a ...
The Chad attacked again, is not it?
Do what, do you?
Tear his balls
with a bite.
It is an option.
Not mine.
It does this with all beginners.
Up to you?
No, I asked him to
to me.
But you did not ask.
He can not stand there
you need to position themselves, defend themselves.
It's like that guy said, you should be
you want to change the world.
In fact, it makes total sense.
Does it?
I do not know what it means
That said.
So, Ben, is not soft.
Well, I need money.
Goodbye.
Change.
Do you come to this bank?
It's my first day as a cashier.
Can I make a deposit ...
or you can make a withdrawal.
Hi, girls!
I was just exercising.
How long I care
the zoo? Why do you ask?
The anaconda?
She'll be in the cage.
I'm alone and you are two.
Why not join us?
It's a baby snake now
but it grows.
Enough!
- Hi
- Hi
You came home early.
What are you doing?
I was doing ...
yoga.
Good.
Have you noticed that your ass
is eating your underwear?
Yes, that happens whenever I do
The Downward-Facing Dog.
Okay.
I saw you on stage soon. Want to go out
me when you finish your shift?
I can not.
I am committed.
- I'm sorry.
- Big deal, me too.
Let's not be afraid.
What is the problem?
I'm just doing it to pay
my marriage.
I promised my bride
the wedding of her dreams, so ...
- But that cute.
- Love makes us do these things.
What cute.
Thank you.
Not bad.
Not take their clothes off for that.
I do not understand, man.
Why me?
Excuse me, miss.
You arrived on time to help with a
dilemma, we're having here.
Can you explain what attracts him?
In fact, you remind me
My favorite nephew.
Except when you swing
your documents in my face, of course.
These cowboys want to give
a ride.
But there's no bull.
Receive the Great Chad!
Hi, cowboy!
Let me pull the trigger!
You need to take off some money.
Need a lot of money.
Why did Chad earn all that money,
do not you?
He is muscular,
up to his nipples are firm.
His brain is the size
of a peanut, but has self-esteem.
He knows who he is.
He believes in himself,
and it shows.
You need to be more
as Chad.
He is an outlaw.
Applause!
How about a ride to the barn?
Do not feel good?
Now, for every woman who ever wanted
see a man looking at her thighs ...
Trevor and Oleg!
The first thing they look at
is our thigh. Is not it?
Wow!
Yes, yes.
Heck, he's big thing.
I already know.
I know!
It's called "search for the signs."
When I was your age ...
was in doubt what to do in life,
and a great friend of mine said ...
"Go into the wilderness,
let the land speak to you ...
learn his teachings
and meet. "
It seems like the dumbest idea
I've heard.
That's right.
I am inside.
Thousand dollars on the horse winning.
The Lucky Jones fifth.
Thank you.
And then ...
The land is already talking to you, Ben?
No.
At least here is beautiful.
We tend to forget
of problems.
We see that we are a speck
insignificant next to mother nature.
Do you know?
Matthews?
Matthews?
Where are you going?
Come back here!
Go back!
Damn!
The earth is speaking to me.
And you know what she is saying?
"Ben, his future father-
is a son of a callous and selfish. "
No just kidding.
You can go back and pick me up?
Please?
Damn.
Matthews ...
Who are you?
My name is Belthagor.
Here, it is best to take something,
compadre. Need to stay hydrated here.
Do you know what your problem is, Ben?
The fact that you know my name?
This business is very good.
What is it?
Blue agave tequila home.
It distorts reality.
It is.
The problem is that you're just
a silly coward.
Are you a slave system,
and too afraid to break free.
You need to break
currents, man.
It's like I used to say
when I was in the Air Force.
Honor your balls, man.
- Honor your balls.
- Honor your balls.
You've been in the Air Force?
They let you fly a plane?
Man ...
Yes.
And I'll tell you ... I think ...
have someone in that trailer
would love to have a conversation with you.
Ben?
Hi
Hi, you are ...
I, but ...
child.
No.
You are me, but old.
- This is weird.
- I know.
We need to talk
about some things.
What kind of things?
This bid dance.
You need to relax, man.
If you release.
The sphincter relaxes a little.
How?
You're too tense. Very concerned
in making an idiot of myself.
Who cares?
People already think you a fool yourself.
- Really?
- You need to go ahead.
Work as if you did not need
money ...
love as if it never hurt and if
dance like nobody's watching.
- Maybe you're right ...
- Of course I'm right.
Rachel is betting on you, man.
It is betting on people.
And I do not even like girls.
I'd do anything for Rachel.
I know I would.
She is everything to me.
You saw the samurai sword?
It's so cool.
Of course you saw.
No one knows exactly what happened
that day in the desert.
If it was a dream, it was real ...
And does it matter?
The important thing is that Ben was another man.
Matthews was right.
Ben met.
Although not all shave the bag
after meeting ...
but Ben was a man with a mission.
Turbine and their motors
because it is a very bad boy.
Exclusively in Male Locker Room,
the Common Man.
I love you.
Look here.
Thank you.
I love the Common Man.
- Great, let's applaud the Common Man.
- Thank you.
Yeah, he's like our neighbor,
he wants to mow your grass.
- I think I've created a monster.
- I do not know it was capable of it.
Give up fear.
- What did you think?
- My God, just like Chad.
Good boy.
Matthews, that is.
Thanks, kid.
COMMON MAN
Everyone is looking around ...
trying to figure out
what is happening.
And then, a nun, looks at his shoe,
and says "holy shit".
Sure, you do not understand
this kind of joke, forget it.
Okay, not everyone understands ...
Man, that too. They are looking
blatantly to me.
I'm being eaten with the eyes
for these girls.
Girls, and so good?
We know you.
You are the Common Man.
Can you give us an autograph?
In this place?
That's what's chest.
One more.
- Down there.
- It is.
Oh my gosh.
I also autograph?
In your dreams, crazy.
He is so hairy.
What the hell was that, man?
I think I missed something here.
What are you doing tonight?
Let's go skinny-dipping
with the Common Man!
Thank you.
My goodness!
We need to chill
this pool.
Stop it!
Come on. He is a good one.
Are you wet?
I am. Come on baby.
Now another girl on stage that will
want to pull her panties because ...
the Common Man.
Because he also delivers pizza
with extra pepperoni.
Good evening.
Damn!
Exit the car, Maureen.
$ 500 for you to spank me
like a schoolgirl.
This is against the rules of the house.
We are no longer in the house,
loverboy.
Thousand dollars and I ride on you
as a pogo stick.
Good evening, Maureen.
At least
let me stay with it.
Do not touch that.
This is very important to me.
Do not touch.
Get out.
Get out.
Thank you.
Good evening, Maureen.
Someone is bravinho today.
I'll stick with that.
Mad.
Hi, love.
Hi
How was your day?
Mine was over.
I love you.
Are you sure?
I love you.
Take off my socks?
Common Man, I was thinking.
What do you think of taking
to headline the Friday night?
I do not know, Mr. Niles.
Are you kidding?
On Friday rolls a lot of money.
Hey, better work when
women are more drunk,
and believe me, they are never
more drunk than on Friday.
But the Chad?
It is not his shift?
Yeah, yeah, Chad ...
The Chad is great ...
but his presentations are
outdated.
You know, nobody can be number one
forever, is not it?
Is not it?
It is not, man?
You're Justin Timberlake,
and it is the Village People.
- Yeah, Niles?
- Great Chad!
You can pick up your Friday,
and shove it.
Wait, wait. Please, Chad.
Listen. I'm sorry.
You'll have a bath in the mud and you were
the chosen friend.
Remember what I said.
Ben was bright, successful,
beautiful ... I almost wanted to sleep with him.
The problem is that he was still
feeling the pressure of marriage.
You like them?
Sample wedding invitation.
- Why you got so much alike?
- I'm trying to do everything right.
I am struggling and no one is
seeing the stress that I'm passing.
And why, why are you covering
nipples with a towel?
It was cold in the bathroom.
And Rachel is smart.
She was beginning to suspect something.
A problem, dear?
Yes, it's Ben.
There's something going on,
and I do not know what it is.
He walks too far lately.
You know, we do not talk more.
We do not ...
You do not?
No, we do not ...
Welcome to my world.
I thought he was happy, you know?
I'm happy.
Nobody ever made me feel the way
that makes me Ben.
And that other guy?
You know that your father wanted
as a man.
Cole?
Are you kidding?
Cole looked cool, but he never
made me laugh the way Ben does.
Why have you done with it?
Why did he betray me
with my best friend.
It is.
Maybe you should call him.
The case between the two
might be over.
I do not want Cole, mother.
I want Ben.
And if he no longer want to marry?
I can not force him to marry me.
Yes you can. Sure you can.
That's what therapists.
And my friend Grace by chance
has a great therapist.
This is not the problem.
Well, things have improved.
Our wedding will be
in less than a month.
We have felt the stress, a little
but it has some other problem with Ben ...
he walks too far,
but he did not tell me what you think.
So here I am.
There is, Ben?
I'd like to talk to each
separately.
Do you mind, Rachel?
You can leave a little, please?
- No, no problem.
- I think I could stay here ...
Rachel, do not ...
My God.
Sure, Ben, there is a kind
abandonment here.
- Maureen, what are you doing?
- I think we need to talk ...
about it face to face.
This is not necessary, Maureen.
Seriously.
What?
I'm not attractive enough?
You are very attractive, is that ...
- My ass is too soft?
- No, it's pretty stiff, you can see.
And my breasts?
They are not big enough
for you?
Please.
What is it?
What did you say, Ben?
It hurts, it hurts.
Enough, Maureen, Maureen.
- Can you imagine what you can do to me?
- I do not want to imagine.
- Come on, Ben!
- I do not want to imagine.
That's it.
My God!
Ben!
Are you ready?
Come on.
We'll be fine.
Camelina already prepared everything for the
power point presentation ...
the meeting with the executives?
We're trying,
but it seems that the projector ...
So be faster. The meeting
is in ten minutes. Not eleven, ten.
Jesus, what a nightmare.
Ben, I looked for you everywhere.
- But what?
- So this is where the magic happens.
What are you doing here?
We need to talk.
Have a second?
I do not ...
I do not.
You can handle it?
What was, what happened?
You need to quit her job here.
Why do that?
Why are you a machine
to make money, my friend.
We need to think big,
and take care of your marketing.
We need to create brand
the Common Man.
You know, you need to get out of nightclubs, go
to birthday parties, bat mitzvahs to.
Wait, why are you talking about "we"?
Well, we're partners.
Are not we?
Matthews, something happened and
you are hiding.
Okay, okay.
Promise you will not freak out?
Sure.
Right.
I've lost all our money, Ben.
Are you serious?
As you do this, Matthews?
Well, it was a card game.
Card game?
What happened to the application,
and that great investment?
And "I have a plan."
What happened?
I thought this would be a
secure investment in the short term.
I had the best cards
the deck.
You know how likely
for the other guy got better cards?
It was one in a million.
Very rare.
I should not have bet everything
I'm sorry.
But I can change everything
in a pinch.
Man!
A helper is well!
Wait, Ben.
I also lost my car.
I know, I'm not a good day.
And I took a taxi here ...
was expensive, and I have no money
enough ...
What is this? A bus?
What madness. A bus.
Faster, Camelina.
Here you go.
I tried to distract them,
but are not messing around.
Okay, it might work.
Damn.
See? What did I say?
You are a slave to the system.
You are a disgrace, Camelina.
Camelina?
- Camelina!
- What?
- What is it?
- Never talk to me like that.
In fact, I never talk to me,
only I say. Do you understand?
He can answer that,
or is it worth now?
You shut up.
You're a nothing, Camelina.
You say the guy from T. I?
But I'll tell you what
his "T.I." means.
"Totally Stupid".
My grandmother had more courage
than you.
I have news for you,
Miss. Entojo.
See it!
Camelina! Come down.
I do not want.
- Do something.
- He's doing well.
Monday to Friday, Monday through Friday!
Security!
Camelina!
Down, down!
I'm going down, love.
I'm going down!
It is time for the conference!
Listen to Miss. Entojo, folks.
By the way, shut up!
You will not stop me.
I am a free man.
You can not fire me,
I ask because the bills ...
- I'm outta here.
- Come on.
I'll take the Chinese to me, dammit!
Get off me!
Must admit,
it was absolutely too much.
But I found?
What is it?
Chad, we can dance with you
Strip-the Pope-Luz?
You are joking, right?
You are a complement,
an accessory.
The Strip-pope-Luz is a serious thing.
And the amazing Chad goes alone.
That was not like?
Well, too bad.
Now, outside,
are scaring me.
Hi, all right, smack balls?
Know that we will find
Strip-in-Luza Pope tomorrow.
Happy?
Yes, I'm happy.
No, actually,
I'm not.
That's right, Ben.
I love men with self-confidence.
You can stop, I know silly.
That check for $ 69,000
already has a name, Chad is great. This is fact.
Common Man, go to the cabin,
is a bachelorette party.
STRIP-TO-Luca, TOMORROW.
GRAND PRIX OF 69 THOUSAND DOLLARS
Check out the stuff!
Who is this?
One second.
Maureen, what you want now?
I can not stop thinking
you.
You are in my dreams,
in my fantasies.
You understand me?
You ruined my life.
I tried to be polite.
Do you know?
Now I want you to stay
away from me.
I do not want you,
and would never want to ...
pursued even if your spit money
as an ATM.
Persecuted?
I'll be back, ladies.
Do not touch that.
I mean, so?
- Maureen!
- Hello, nice.
How kind of you,
thank you. Congratulations and all that.
- Thank you.
- Maureen! Girls, I'll be back.
Maureen, your crazy nymphomaniac.
Give it here!
Returns!
Hi, want a ride?
Yes, thank you.
Follow that insect there.
What is turning right.
Why do we have to follow that car?
You have been stolen?
It is, as you know?
It always happens.
Should get a lot of girls
this car is not it?
Actually, no.
What are you doing?
She is going away.
We will miss it.
Why are you stopping?
- What are you doing?
- You are giving a hard, horny that.
No! Stop it!
Let me out of here.
Not funny, unlock the door.
Kiss me.
Let me out of here,
its crazy.
Young lady, where do you go?
Come here.
Stopped!
I said stop!
We have a fugitive.
Get up, get up!
Stand up.
Place your hands on the head.
And separate the fingers.
- Already are.
- Are you facing me?
- No.
- Take two steps back.
Come on.
Stop it.
Move your feet.
Move more.
Cross your feet.
- Let us cross.
- Cross your feet.
Place hands on hips.
Hold your breath.
I changed my mind, move your feet.
Place your hands on the head.
Stop it.
Lower.
Tap your feet, man.
- Wow.
- No, you can get up, get up!
Turn around.
- I'm sorry, I did not see the lights.
- Right, right ...
Seriously, I never ...
It is silent.
Is tight.
Wow!
Let me see your wrist.
Love, hi, me again.
Where are you?
I'm starting to get worried.
Call me when you hear the message,
okay?
I love you.
No sound here.
We can create one.
- We show for it.
- Yes
- Let's see?
- Want to be a pervert or a prostitute?
I will be weighed.
Come on.
How much do you charge per hour, precious?
$ 50.
Discount for seniors.
This ...
This ...
No, no.
No!
- I can not.
- It's too big for my mouth.
Wow, was very good.
And it was fast.
See?
Quiet.
- It's not funny.
- I know.
So how about this test?
He offered me a ride.
- You're disgusting.
- It is.
- And why the silver floss?
- Not what you're thinking.
- Is not it?
- So what is it?
- Look, if you ...
- Sitting.
Okay.
It is they turn the image,
will see that I was trying ...
- Trying to what?
- Unlock the door.
With this thong?
I know it seems, but I can assure
things that did not happen.
He had oral sex.
He touched me ...
Can we start again?
You want to hear again?
Okay, let's go.
- No, the tape ...
- Let us again. Whether you again?
- I want to be a prostitute now.
- A whore?
- I want!
- Okay, let's get back.
- OK.
- You have sex with singles?
I accept meal vouchers also
I am a cheap whore.
- Return the money because I'm ugly.
- Whore cheap.
Something terrible has happened.
Honey, stop worrying.
He is an adult. Should be fine.
He never did it before, he, he ...
He never stayed out so late,
much less without binding.
It is Ben. Ben, where are you?
We spent a sleepless night.
Arrested?
Why?
You said "male prostitution"?
Seriously, Spiderman ...
I'm flattered to have found
My pretty mouth. Seriously.
I can make you very happy.
I guess I could think straight.
VALLEY POLICE DEPARTMEN I think I owe you an explanation.
Please, do not be so.
Rachel, I love you.
Love? Do not talk to me about love,
our love is really a farce.
What are you talking about?
I do not know, maybe you're on the street,
selling her body in the middle of the night.
- You may have to do with it.
- Not what you're thinking.
Well, you were not collecting donations
for the church.
Mother, please.
This is not your account.
None of my account?
In the last six weeks, I am
killing me to help organize ...
marriage for you,
and Mister Universe.
Of course none of my business.
The marriage will not happen again,
for sure.
Rachel ...
You do not know what I'm doing.
I'm doing it for you ...
I do not want to hear.
I do not want to hear any more and you arrive.
I loved you, Ben.
I trusted you.
That's what I deserve for being
so stupid.
- Yeah, yeah.
- Be quiet, mother!
Stop the car.
Now.
That sounds good.
Let's stop and calm down.
Get out of here.
What?
Rachel.
Sai you.
This car is my mother.
Okay. I go out.
I came here to pay bail
Ben Camelina.
This name is familiar to me.
The deep throat.
You can not.
He already was.
It was?
He kicked the bucket?
What did you say?
If he "kicked the bucket"?
I do not hear this from
the seventies.
No one kicked the bucket,
it kicks the bucket, close the jacket.
Someone has posted bail for him.
Now out of here.
Thank you.
- And no running in the lobby.
- OK.
Where's Ben?
What does it matter?
He must have told everything.
The face is what is happening.
Honey, I'm sorry.
It's all my fault.
What?
As well, it's all your fault?
I forced to do so.
I know it was a bad idea,
but what can I say?
Ben was good.
- He was good?
- Actually, he was great.
How do you know?
Well, I watched him every night.
I'm going to vomit.
It was not that bad.
I even learned some things.
Ben has been innovating and getting
better and better. It was something incredible.
And so, one needed
managing money.
My God, and we were winning
money like mad.
Wait, you were the pimp him?
No, I prefer the name
"Administrator of business."
This story is getting worse.
Look, dear, do not know if that
makes a difference to you, but ...
he had
especially for women.
Mostly?
Well, sometimes he had gay men.
Good. I'm glad he did
more sex with strange women ...
than with men.
Who mentioned the word "sex"?
Sex tends to be a very
important in prostitution, is not it?
Okay, let's recap this conversation.
And when the going gets tough,
for whom you care?
For your best buddy in the world.
What will you do now?
The bags, I think.
Over?
Really?
I think being arrested for prostitution
male ends up with anything.
Find another woman.
Come on, it's okay.
He's living a dream.
You are the "common man".
The girls are coming,
asking to autograph her breasts ...
and elsewhere.
Not sure why I feel sorry for you,
of truth. Not supposed to be, you know?
Yeah.
Thank you for me, Lewis.
Company you want, man?
Dancer in the night?
Yeah, I wanted to marry
a lawyer, but ...
How to let it go, Jack?
How can you lie to us?
I did not lie to you.
I just omit the truth.
Why did you would
become a stripper?
This is a good question.
It is best to prepare for response.
I can not find my vitamins.
The tablets are in the drawer.
How do I say this delicately?
We are broken.
- What?
- Wait, what broke?
No, dear, we're broke.
Broken?
I mean, no money?
Not a penny. But at least
we have each other, right?
We had a trick up his sleeve.
Ben would win the Strip-pope-Luz, e. ..
would pay for the wedding.
Everything was out in the end.
Strip-Pope what?
It is the biggest competition of male strippers
the country's e. ..
good, an event is transmitted
live on TV.
Ben would be naked on TV?
No, Ben was going to be dental floss
on television.
My God.
Honey, do not blame Ben for it.
Please.
It was all my fault.
And he was doing it for you.
All he wanted was to give
the wedding of your dreams. E. ..
I do too.
Ben would do it for me?
Yes, he would.
Now that I know well,
I think I would do almost anything for you.
He loves you, Rachel.
I could not expect anything else
a son in law.
What time would he have?
In just over an hour.
STRIP-PAPA-Luz
Twenty years, five hundred cans of hairspray ...
four thousand gallons of depilatory wax ...
and millions of horny women
around the world.
The National Association of strippers
male ...
proudly presents
Strip-the-pope Luza number twenty.
Ben, my father told me everything.
About money, striptease, everything.
I'm sorry, okay I. ..
Ben, for.
Being in night,
by stripping to make money ...
for marriage
doing this for me ...
It makes me the luckiest woman
the world.
Really?
I love you so much, Ben camelish.
I love you, Rachel Matthews.
Camelina.
Well, I think it's time
Lewis Gardner fall out ...
before rolling the sex of reconciliation.
Not yet.
Ben comes in 20 minutes, not
I will miss the chance to see him dancing ...
in front of a lot of women
hysterical.
Are you sure?
You'll flip when you see my little steps.
I'm like a ninja on stage.
- Come on.
- Thank you.
And now, the man who has never seen a mirror
without falling in love, Chad!
Okay, where the hell are they?
Putting the matter in a day coffee?
And onstage, coming there from Australia,
here it is, kangaroo jumping Jack!
It'll be nice.
I'll use that fancy?
Use what you're wearing,
you will get it.
That's what I like.
Common Man, you're next.
Excuse me, sir.
Yes?
The Common Man has not arrived yet.
Could you wait
few minutes for him?
Why do not you go on stage
and speaks to a studio full ...
of excited women,
we stop the show ...
because of an idiot who does not know
read the time. That's great.
To talk like that?
The wave of love coming from Tokyo.
Please receive ...
the great Tsunami!
Jack, do something.
- Need to act, to buy time for them.
- And how do I do this?
I do ask.
You are the king of lies.
This is not my problem.
It's your problem, yes. This whole situation
is a ridiculous problem of its own, Jack.
Stop taking the body out.
Be a man.
You are right.
Hope you're not running away,
Jack Matthews.
- What are you doing?
- Man, I'd use it tomorrow.
Improvising.
Pay attention to the road.
Ladies, there was a change in the program.
But you will love.
Receive the "99 cents".
And there, DJ?
Passing.
Go, go, go.
And that, ladies?
Uncle Sven?
Bill?
It is Ben.
You will not perform, are you?
No, I created the strip-pope-Luz.
And I was rich.
Remember my mother, is not it?
How do I forget? She taught me
things that I did not know existed.
She has already shown the videos
we did together?
I saw your performance unwittingly
you were great.
Thank you.
What are you doing here?
Introducing myself.
Wonder.
Thanks!
I just wanted to say you always made me
feel as if I had a father.
Okay.
Interval, called the range.
It's my husband.
Cut, cut!
Ladies, please.
Thank you, girls.
And now, I want lots of applause ...
for the sole and exclusive Common Man!
I love you.
My goodness!
Ladies, control yourself!
Let me go, let me go!
Stay connected.
After the break ...
we'll announce the winner
vigzimo the Strip-Pope-Luz.
Thank you, guys.
Please, thank you.
I want to thank all competitors,
for this beautiful night we had, is not it?
Applause to them.
Yeah, they were phenomenal.
And now we will announce
our winner.
Come on.
The Ice Man and Gelinhos.
That's it!
That's it.
Congratulations.
Very well.
Congratulations.
Personal, applause!
Love, you were amazing.
I know. Not amazing enough
to win, but he deserved it.
That's life.
Ben did not win the money ...
but more importantly, he won
Rachel's heart.
But look at the situation ...
she will marry a guy
what was once a stripper.
He will shake the very bedroom.
I do not want a fancy wedding.
I was delighted with the magazines,
and TV shows ...
and believe all the crap I read
about having a perfect marriage.
Ben, Ben. I think not.
It's not fair.
Can not believe he won.
These people should be prosecuted.
- It was really stolen.
- Jack, relax.
I do not want to have a heart attack
and die ...
I will now that I find attractive
for the first time in ten years.
Really?
How did this happen?
Was it the robot as well?
- Enough, can we go?
- Yes
- Come on.
- Come on.
Thanks for everything, Matthews.
It is Mr. Matthews.
Just kidding,
call me "father."
There is not much to talk about now.
Mr. Matthews decided to pursue their
dreams ...
and retired from
financial advisor.
Now he is a professional player.
The table is mine.
Damn!
Miss. Watson was fired
after a day of drinking ...
they sent an email to
company-wide ...
with a naked photo of our President
annexed.
This is my story,
and I'll keep it until the end.
And you must be wondering ...
what happened to that man manly
named Lewis Gardner and sexy.
And Ben Camelina ...
He began to devote
their drawings.
There are many people behind him
because of a comic book ...
he wrote called "Everyman."
They are even talking about doing a movie
about it. As Hollywood is ridiculous.
And by the way, Ben and Rachel found
a way of paying for the wedding.
So the power vested in me
the state of California ...
Dressing the Male
and the guy upstairs ...
I now pronounce you husband and wife.
You may kiss the bride, lucky asshole