Beginners (2010) Movie Script
Okay. Is it on?
Yeah, yeah.
Okay. Okay.
This is for our friend,
Hal Fields.
Hal, we love you.
Arthur, you're coming to
live with me now, okay?
This is my car.
This is the dining room where
people come and eat sometimes.
This is the living room.
That's the bathroom.
This is 2003.
This is what
the sun looks like,
and the stars, nature...
This is the President.
And this is the sun in 1955.
And the stars,
and nature,
and cars and phones
and movies and the President.
These are what
pets looked like.
These are fireworks.
This was smoking.
This is what it looked like
when people kissed.
When they were happy.
When they were sad.
My parents got
married in 1955.
He was a museum director
and she fixed up old houses.
They had a child and they
stayed married for 44 years,
until she died in their bed,
after four months of cancer,
and eating French toast for every meal,
and watching
the Teletubbies every day,
and confusing white straws
for her cigarettes,
and skipping back
and forth through time inside her head.
Six months later,
my father told me he was gay.
He had just turned 75.
I'm gay.
I always remember him wearing a purple
sweater when he told me this,
but, actually,
he wore a robe.
I'm gay.
I'm gay.
I loved your mother, but...
...now I want to
explore this side.
I don't wanna be
just theoretically gay.
I wanna do
something about it.
I wanna do
something about it.
I wanna do
something about it.
He changed
all his clothes.
He got a boyfriend, Andy,
a physical trainer
who was also studying
for his professional
pyrotechnic license.
Since I came out to my
father, he never speaks to me.
That's why I've been always
attracted to older men.
He found an out gay priest
to guide him spiritually.
He saw a therapist
for the first time.
He joined the Prime Timers,
movie night,
Los Angeles Pride.
And then four years after he came out,
he died in this room.
Look, it's lonely out here, so you'd
better learn how to talk with me.
I know. I know.
Calm. Calm, calm breaths.
Calm.
Oliver!
Please help me
with all these ropes.
Pop, Pop,
stop, stop, stop.
You're gonna
hurt yourself.
Mr. Fields, we're gonna have
to secure your arms again, okay?
You two married?
No, Pop.
Why not? She's great.
Yeah, she's a great nurse in the
hospital, but we don't really know her.
You're very high
on drugs.
Yes, you've always had
some very good reasons,
...haven't you?
- No, Pop,
I just don't wanna be
like you and Mom.
Well...
Thank you.
Oliver?
Ollie, you can do better.
That's good.
Go and have your own
experiences with your own people.
I'll be right here.
I'm a human.
I'm not a dog.
And you're a Jack Russell
and that's a breed.
Your personality was created
by this guy, John Russell,
who was a hunting
enthusiast in the 1800s.
And he bred your ancestors for their
stamina and their courage for the hunt.
You think you're you when
you wanna chase the foxes,
but other people planted
that in you years ago.
And now,
somewhat arbitrarily,
you're considered
very cute by us humans.
And we keep breeding you not
to chase foxes, but to be cute.
And we put you in
television shows and movies,
and you're chasing
tennis balls
because they're as close to
a fox as you're gonna get.
- Hey, Liz.
- Hey.
Let's read this one.
I found a lot of books.
Yeah, all right.
Give me
the flashlight.
- Nice.
- That's nice.
Andy brought those for you.
- Oh, yeah?
- Yeah.
Who did that painting?
Well, I don't know. It's
just a painting on the wall.
And these?
They're
just photos, Pop.
But how do they relate
to the exhibit?
They're just personal
photos. They're not art.
And that's the
water sprinkler thing.
Well, it's beautiful.
What is?
Putting the Japanese Gardens
there. It's just beautiful.
Hal?
Andy!
I brought
something for you.
We made
a recording for you.
Oh, God.
This is for our friend, Hal Fields.
Oh, my God.
- Huh?
- Yeah.
Jesus, Liz. Another
band that wants portraits.
Well, at least
it pays the rent.
You do something decent once
and that's all people ever want.
Hi, Liz.
- Oliver?
- Yeah?
The pen is not
your friend.
The paper is
not your friend.
The party is your friend.
We're your friends.
Your friends
are your friends.
Okay?
I've got the skills
He's got the moves
I've got the moves.
- I've got the skills.
- I've got the skills.
Arthur, you haven't been
invited to this party.
You're gonna stay
and look after the house.
You remember when
Oliver was funny,
and he could actually, like,
talk in complete sentences?
Funny, funny...
I don't think...
Funny. Yeah.
Fun. But not funny, unless,
like, serious is funny.
Then he's fucking
hilarious. But...
Lovable. Lovable.
Yeah, very lovable.
You are very lovable.
Hey, what's up!
Step aside.
Step aside.
He is so cute!
Does he do tricks?
No.
His name is Arthur.
He doesn't do tricks.
- No?
- No.
Arthur. Sit.
Oh, my God!
Hi. Shake.
Oh, my God.
He's so cute. I want him.
Does it make you
feel powerful to order my dog around?
Maybe give you
a sense of power?
You're
being a therapist!
Freud!
Thanks, yeah.
Very good.
Bye, Arthur.
Well, I didn't ask for this.
Who would ask for this?
This color, this nose,
this cheek, this chin.
You know,
this is my life.
This isn't a story.
This isn't a joke.
Yeah.
I'm so glad
you came, Doc.
Just really good to get
this stuff off my chest.
I'm sorry.
Our time is up
for this week.
Thank you
for coming in.
Oh.
I was just...
I was gonna take
a break, actually.
Okay.
I guess we should
start with your mother.
Well, then,
your father.
I don't understand.
You can't talk?
Is it a mental problem?
Do you need analysis?
It's a physical problem.
I was doing such
a good job of hiding it.
How could you tell?
Clearly,
I'm gonna need a drink.
You?
You stay here. Yeah.
- No, it's not a natural color for a chicken.
- No.
And you see what happens when
you free yourself from the cage,
walk away
from the factory?
You just have no real color.
You're like...
Hey, can you...
Hey, there.
Uh-oh. One.
Uh-oh. Two.
Two drinks.
What does that mean...
One, two.
Well, that's two people.
- Two people. A girl and a guy?
- Hopefully.
Yeah. Wow.
Making moves.
Hello?
- Oliver?
- Yeah.
I'm not sorry I woke you.
I went to Act Bar tonight.
- You did?
- Yeah.
They had some
wonderfully loud music.
What kind of
music is that?
Probably house music.
House music. Okay.
House, house music.
Did you meet anyone?
- Did you meet anyone?
- No.
Young gay men don't go
for older gay men.
You have it easy.
Would you
like to dance?
Hello.
Can I give you
my number?
Thanks.
I feel bad dragging Arthur to
the party. I should get home.
It was really
nice meeting you.
Au revoir.
Yeah.
Hello?
Is that you?
One beep means "yes"?
I've always wanted to have a phone
call with someone who doesn't talk.
You wanna do something?
Now?
Okay, I'm parked just
right up the street.
Okay. You point,
I'll drive.
This way?
Nice place.
Oh, my mother. My mother
died five years ago.
Oh, man.
Oh, you spoke.
I'm not supposed to.
My father died two
months ago, almost three.
He was gay.
He was gay the whole
time they were married.
He came out
after my mother died,
and he was
Sorry.
Can we just sleep?
Sure. Sure.
Oliver.
How long are you here
when you get back?
A year?
A month?
Right. And then?
You're filming here.
Acting.
And after?
Just somewhere else.
Where?
Yes.
Hello, house.
Hello, Oliver.
Jesus, Pop,
you get so much mail.
Hal, it's remarkable how
well you've recovered
from being on
the ventilator.
But?
The bronchoscopy
revealed a mass
about the size of a quarter
located in your lower right lung.
I'm afraid the biopsy
showed it's cancerous.
Uh-huh. I see.
It appears
to have spread
to the large hilar lymph
nodes in your chest and liver.
With the already weakened state of
your heart and lungs,
surgery isn't possible,
given its location.
We can start
radiation treatments
and see if you're
strong enough for chemo.
You will be able
to go home.
Do you have
any questions?
No.
Thank you.
I'm sorry.
Well, let's not rush
out and tell everyone.
Andy?
No need to
get him up a tree.
Can you read me
something?
"The Brazilian ballet star is already
known not only as a skilled partner,
"but also as a gifted
and versatile dancer
"who adeptly fields roles ranging
from the strictly classical..."
Yeah, he's fine.
He sleeps on your bed.
But is he eating?
Yeah. Yeah, he's eating.
Oh, God, I worry
so much about...
Oh. Here we are.
What have you
got in there?
A slug.
Andy, you can't bring
that kind of thing...
You cannot.
I can. Look.
Fuck you.
It's time for inspection.
- Hello, Mr. Fields.
- Hello.
I'm Andy.
Hal's boyfriend.
I'm Sophia.
You know, I have the right to
be here as much as anyone else.
Go take a walk.
Calm yourself.
What was all that?
Andy hasn't
had it easy, too.
Be nice to him.
Excuse me.
Andy,
where did you get these?
Guys, guys,
this is to us.
Cheers.
Cheers.
Drinking is not
allowed in the room.
It's not?
I'm sorry.
No, no, no.
No, no.
She's a wonderful nurse.
Here's to healthcare.
To healthcare!
What did you do with
my father? He was so polite.
Well, I invited him, but
he never returns my calls.
Two, four,
six, eight.
That's it? That's
all you're gonna tell me.
I'm gonna meet her
at her hotel again, okay?
You happy?
Yeah. I'm very happy.
Are you happy?
Here's eight.
We haven't actually had a
conversation yet, so, you know...
You're thinking
about her all the time.
And you know
that because?
Because you're not
talking about it.
I know you.
It's true.
It's embarrassing. I'm 38,
falling for a girl again.
It's like I lost
the instructions
or I never had them.
Where's Pop?
At the museum.
Is something wrong
with you guys?
What, are you
in the FBI?
No.
CIA?
No.
- KGB?
- No.
SLA? PTA?
No.
BMW?
There's nothing wrong
with me and Pop.
When you feel bad,
you go into your room
and scream as loud as you
can for a minute or two
and then it's out of you.
It's called catharsis.
I don't feel
like screaming.
You will.
What the fuck is that?
L-E-It. Elliot.
Well, that's ridiculous.
I know.
You're not
very supportive.
Well, it's just like
copying something
that someone, like, did
Well, yeah. I'm a part of a
tradition of civil disobedience.
Something bigger
than myself.
How's it work?
You have to shake it.
Shake it.
What was that?
Historical consciousness.
Something bigger than myself.
Let's do it again.
Okay, but
when you see her,
don't tell her that you painted
historical consciousness on the wall.
He's sweet.
He misses your dad.
Maybe we could just
talk for a second.
Right.
Well, my name is Anna.
You're worried
you can't trust me
because you
don't know who I am.
I get it.
That makes sense to me.
Oliver, stop it.
This music's old.
It's black.
Black music's the deepest
'cause they suffered the most.
Them and the Jews.
In my next life,
I'm gonna marry
a good hot-blooded Jew.
Someone full of emotion.
I'm Jewish, right?
You're a quarter.
I'm a half.
Your father's none.
He has the least emotions.
You'll have more
emotions than him.
But I'll have
the most emotions.
You get to play chauffeur, but
only to the bottom of the hill.
You're turning into
a wonderful driver.
Excuse me,
Mrs. Fields?
What, you're not allowed
to interact with the art?
Well, it's just that...
You too? You like
being a good citizen?
No.
Can you toss me
my camisole?
No, my camisole.
Camisole?
You don't know
what a camisole is?
I was brought up
by these animals,
and they didn't
like questions.
They were very frowned upon.
So, I had to guess.
You can ask me anything.
Anything?
What's that there?
- That's a tree.
- Yeah.
- And cars.
- Uh-huh.
Another building
like this one.
Right.
People in the building like us.
Half of them think things
will never work out.
The other half
believe in magic.
It's like a war
between them.
How do you know
so much about people?
Oh.
Well, you have to learn
how to read their faces.
For example...
Here is mad.
Happy.
Sometimes
it's just nothing.
Oh, yeah?
This is nothing.
And they are good
at looking one way
and being another way.
You don't know me.
I like that.
No, that's not true.
Oh, yeah?
Yeah, you have blonde hair that goes
down to about here.
You smoke in non-smoking rooms.
You bite sometimes.
Okay, open your eyes.
Yeah, you drive on the sidewalk.
You were raised by animals.
Sometimes you look very alone, like
you just got here.
Yeah, you see,
you don't know me at all.
Someone flashy walks into your life
and you're just gonna fall for it.
No, it doesn't work like that. There
are other steps, it's complicated.
Yeah. Me, too.
What happened
with Michelle?
I don't know. You know.
She seemed great.
She was great.
Well, maybe you should take
out a personal ad, you know,
where you can explain
your situation.
My situation?
Yeah.
I mean, you wanna be in a
relationship and you can't stay in one.
That's your fatherly
advice, personal ads?
Well...
A lot of people use them.
I did.
What?
If Andy wasn't going to be
monogamous, why should I be?
Jesus, Pop.
- Jesus yourself.
- Yeah?
You look great, Hal.
So handsome.
Hello, house.
Hello, Hal.
Hello, Hal.
Oh, God, what have you got this time?
It's a green
caterpillar.
No, no, no, you don't
have a green caterpillar.
Yeah, I do.
Oh, my God.
Gross! Oh, Jesus.
Hey, you going?
Yeah.
Michael's in town.
Oh.
Right.
I thought he was
your boyfriend.
At least I'm
the number one boyfriend.
Pop.
My stomach.
All right, come on.
Come on.
Well, let's say...
Arthur, down.
Let's say,
since you were little,
and you always dreamed
of some day getting a lion?
And you wait and you wait
and you wait and you wait,
and the lion doesn't come.
Then along
comes a giraffe.
You can be alone or you
can be with the giraffe.
I'd wait for the lion.
That's why
I worry about you.
Here.
You see, you'd like me to
be with someone like me.
I like Andy because
he isn't like me.
He's fun.
Hey, what'd you get?
Liv Ullmann.
Very serious.
And I found
this crazy book.
That's kind of
a classic American thing.
Maybe we can figure out some
classic American things to do.
Yeah.
- Like 75.
- Mmm-hmm.
Or 75 all the
way through...
Through 80.
Louise Brooks,
star of silent screen,
effectively banned from
Hollywood in the early '30s,
ended up working as a
salesgirl at Saks Fifth Avenue.
I love her.
And Veronica Lake.
Was a pin-up model
and a film star.
Success was short-lived,
a series of broken marriages.
She struggled with mental
illness and alcoholism.
She died of hepatitis
at the age of fifty-three.
All these actor
stories end sad.
I can tell you
that already.
That's not a good thing.
So. Now I want
real Mexican food.
And I want to try page
forty-six.
- No.
- Yeah.
Really?
It's really good.
What do you think?
It's so good.
- It's good.
- Mmm.
- I wasn't sure you'd like it.
- Why?
You're an actress and
staying in that fancy hotel.
I like this place.
I used to love hotels.
But now I'm always in a new apartment
or in another hotel somewhere.
How do you keep hold of
friends? Or boyfriends?
Makes it very easy
to end up alone.
To leave people.
You can stay in the same place and
still find ways to leave people.
You are like that?
It's what you do?
So, we are the same?
Yeah, I guess so.
Oh, did I wake you?
Yeah. Thank you, Maria.
And now that you're here,
would you please
put those up there?
What are you... Pop.
What...
I'm reorganizing.
Prednisone
makes you crazy.
I'm just not sleepy.
I feel great.
Pop, you should rest.
Soon as I finish these
papers. Right, papers?
Right, Hal. As
soon as you're done, you can rest.
What?
Nothing.
You're pretty.
No.
Yeah.
Jewish girls
are not pretty.
They can be interesting
or cute, but not pretty.
You're kidding, right?
That's what
my mom told me.
She did not.
No, you're right.
This girl at school
told me that,
and I went home and my mom
said, "Anna, who told you that?"
This is what it looks like when Anna
tells me about being Jewish in 2003.
And when I tell her
my mother was Jewish.
And that my father
turned in his gay badge
when my mother turned
in her Jewish badge.
And they got married
in 1955.
My mother didn't know she was Jewish
until she was thirteen.
It was 1938.
This is what
people looked like.
And lions and giraffes.
This man was
the Man of the Year.
Her father tried to hide
that they were Jewish.
This is the swim team
that asked her to leave
once they discovered
that she was Jewish.
This is what pretty
looked like in 1938.
My father realized
he was gay when he was thirteen.
It was 1938.
This is what
pretty looked like.
This is the high school
where they first met.
This is the war
they both went to.
And this man was popular
when they met again.
This is the only place my father could hide
and have sex in the '50s.
My father said if you got caught
by the vice squad,
you could lose everything.
This is everything.
My father laid down
on a couch like this
and told the psychiatrist
all his problems in 1955.
The doctor told him
that homosexuality was a mental illness,
but it could be cured.
Not everyone got cured.
This is where
my parents lived in 1955.
And this is the home
where the first gay-rights
group were secretly meeting.
While they were
reciting their vows here in this church,
Allen Ginsberg was
writing his famous poem,
Howl, blocks away
in this room.
"...who let themselves be
fucked in the ass
"by saintly motorcyclists,
"and screamed with joy,
"who blew and were blown
by those human seraphim, the sailors,
"caresses of Atlantic
and Caribbean love..."
Just do the portrait of them.
It's an album cover, right?
That's all they want. Yeah?
Yeah.
Right.
- Here, Pop.
- Oh, God.
I know, I know.
Come on.
Hey, no, no, no. That's Gay
Pride day stuff. Just leave those.
All right.
And that's gay book club.
You better leave those, too.
But what about the chair?
Is the chair gay?
The chair is not gay.
Obviously.
Pop, Pop, the cord
won't go so far.
To hell with it.
Oh, what's that?
Now that you're
out of the hospital,
you'll have to exercise,
get you back into shape.
That's a great idea.
Okay, let's try it.
I'll show you how.
Yeah, later on.
I'm gonna make
myself some tea.
Okay. I'll go clean it up.
It's a little bit...
Your mother's vase
needs some flowers.
You need to tell Andy
that you're not well.
Pop, you're just out of the
hospital. You should take it easy.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
You'll tell him,
won't you?
Me?
Please.
Hey.
You know, I tried to
have sex with women?
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
I just wanted you to know, I
tried. It just... It didn't work.
Hey, I don't have
a problem with gay guys.
Have you had
sex with a man?
No.
I heard that if a man hasn't
had sex with another man,
he's always
afraid of gay men.
You know,
they're a threat.
I don't know, Andy.
I didn't want you
to feel threatened.
I don't wanna
have sex with you.
What I do,
most people wouldn't
even call it sex anyway.
Okay.
Okay.
Hey.
I couldn't tell him.
That's okay.
No, it's not.
You can't hide this
from him. He loves you.
For someone with so much
relationship advice,
you seem awfully alone.
Just act natural.
When he's not looking,
we'll make a run for it.
Okay?
Don't, don't, don't.
It's my dad.
He's that bad?
I'm gonna
let you be me.
Okay.
Annie?
You never call me back.
I'm busy. I'm shooting all the time.
You know, I can't
stop thinking about...
You know, about it.
Doing it.
Doing what?
Killing myself.
You are the only one
I can tell that to.
You should tell Mom
about that, not me.
You are my girl.
Now I'll have
to kill you.
Just as it was
going so well.
I know. I'm sorry.
Really?
Hey, Anna.
Hey, Oliver.
How do you feel
about vandalism?
I don't know.
Pretty okay.
Oliver,
don't write any of that serious
stuff, okay? Just something funny.
Girls like funny.
- Okay?
- Okay.
You know what?
Here, give me Arthur.
We'll just stay here
and get arrested.
You know, that's good.
- Good?
- Mmm.
You okay?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
You okay?
Yeah. I'm gonna stay
here with my new friend.
Okay.
Anna?
I'm trying
to impress you.
Really?
It's working.
Arthur, Arthur.
No, no, no, no.
I'm sorry.
No problem. No problem.
What's with this card?
- Do you mind?
- No.
- Thank you.
- All right.
He looked like your dad.
Yeah.
Somewhere along the line
he stopped admitting to
himself that he was sick.
Oliver, this is Blake.
He's a wonderful man.
Look. I finally
got a tattoo.
Registration purposes,
of course.
Good for him.
We did
a lot of shopping.
Bought all these books.
Hello, Hal.
Hello.
New clothes.
He was obsessed
with Staples.
Bought a lot of plants.
A lot of parties.
Well, glad you
could make it.
I thought I was
cooking dinner.
It's movie night,
you idiot.
Hal,
you look wonderful.
I'm turning the corner
on this thing.
- Hi, Oliver.
- Hey, Oliver.
Hey.
These political
letter-writing parties.
There was an out
gay congressman he was supporting.
He hired a secretary
he would dictate to.
And one May morning...
He started telling everyone
he was getting better.
Why are you telling them
you're turning the corner?
Well...
You have
stage four cancer.
It's not as bad
as it sounds.
Pop,
there is no stage five.
That's not what it means.
Well, then what
does it mean?
It just means that it's been
through three other stages.
What movie
are we watching?
The Times of Harvey Milk,
the first openly gay politician...
Yeah, I know
who Harvey Milk is.
Good, good.
What really
counts is that a person care.
Does a person care
about his city or her city?
Is a person sensitive...
Wrote an essay
about religion.
"Eventually,
Jesus grew old.
"He could no longer walk far
"and he could no longer
preach in a loud voice.
"One day he announced to his
apostles that he was departing.
"The three disciples
prayed with him,
"gave him water,
bathed and fed him.
"After gasping for breath
for several days,
"one morning,
just as dawn came,
"Jesus passed away."
You rewrote
Jesus' death?
It was far too violent.
We need new stories.
For the first time
I saw him really in love.
He sounds amazing.
But that must have
been crazy for you.
Anna?
I couldn't sleep
and I wanted to walk around.
You've lost so much.
What if I can't
make it further?
If this is too much,
then we should
just stop.
Wait, wait.
Wait, wait, wait.
I don't wanna stop.
Oh!
- Ready?
- Yeah!
- Again!
- Again?
- Again!
- Again!
Fuck!
Fuck!
Fuck!
Fuck!
Fuck!
Fuck!
Fuck!
- Fuck!
- Fuck!
Arthur.
Arthur!
Come on,
doggie, doggie.
Arthur.
I'm gonna go this way.
I'm gonna go farther out.
Whoo!
Ah! You're awake.
Arthur says
you have to get up.
He says
it's his day off.
- He speaks to you, too.
- Yeah.
He says now. Now. Now.
Your English
is not so perfect.
And he said 10 minutes.
You okay?
You did really well.
Yeah, I can't believe
that was your first time.
It was your first time.
You watching all the humans
going around and around.
Excuse me, sir. There's
no dogs allowed in the building.
You need to remove him
from the premises, please.
If I leave him on his own,
he loses all control.
I'm sorry. There's no dogs
allowed in the building.
- Yeah, yeah, but...
- Come on, please.
If I leave him in the car, he cries,
he howls. I can't leave him in the car.
I'm sorry, no.
He needs to be removed.
I don't know what she's
saying and I don't like it.
You need to remove the dog
from the premises.
She's just talking in French. She's
saying, "It's okay, it's such a small dog."
- You're gonna call the authorities?
- All right, you know what?
- She's calling the authorities.
- Steal the skates.
Steal the skates.
- Okay?
- Okay.
- Come on, Arthur.
- Faster, faster.
Okay. Sorry.
Excuse me.
Hi.
I can't do it.
He doesn't always
call this much.
Sometimes he's fine.
Yeah, well.
He shouldn't
do this to you.
Even if we don't answer
the phone, he's still here.
I run somewhere new and...
You're leaving
here soon.
Yeah.
I think you should
come to my house.
Move in with me.
Would you want
a strange girl like me?
Yeah, a lot.
Do you cook?
Yes.
I would love that.
I'm really gonna
have to kill you now.
Mmm. Why?
Because I'm falling
in love with you.
Anna and I are
in a relationship in 2003.
This is what
the sun looks like
and the stars.
This is what it looks like when we eat.
When we tell each other
the stories in our heads.
I was born in 1965.
Anna was born in 1971.
This is what
the sun looked like.
Her pets.
Her parents.
She left home
when she was sixteen.
She lived here and here
and here and here.
She had three serious relationships.
She left all of them.
I had four serious relationships.
I left them, too.
Or let them fall apart.
We didn't go to this war.
We didn't have to
hide to have sex.
Our good fortune
allowed us to feel
a sadness that our parents
didn't have time for,
and a happiness that
I never saw with them.
We didn't know how we learned
the stories in our heads,
but sometimes
they stop running
and I can really see
Anna's eyes in 2003.
Her ears.
Her feet.
This is what it looks like when she says,
"I love you," in 2003.
This is what it looks
like when she cries.
When she tells me there's
always a new empty room waiting for her.
They used to
make her feel free.
Now they make her feel
the opposite of free.
- Last one.
- Oh, Lord.
I know.
There.
This is for you. Yeah.
Now, that means
Gay Pride.
Yeah, everyone
knows that.
No, they don't.
Yeah. Everyone
knows about that.
No. Of course not.
Don't be silly.
Pop, pretty much everyone
knows that that means Gay Pride.
- Do they really?
- Yeah.
Did you know?
About me?
No.
I just thought you
and Mom weren't in love.
We loved each other.
But you were gay
the whole time.
Well, I worked
hard not to be.
For 44 years?
Yeah.
I knew I was gay, though.
I mean, at parties I'd be staring
at the husbands and not the wives.
What about sex?
Well, she didn't think
I was the greatest lover.
But we made do.
Look, I liked my life.
The museum, our house.
That's what I wanted.
And Mom.
You wanted Mom,
too, right?
Yes!
Stop that.
She proposed to me,
you know.
I said,
"Look, I love you, and we're great
buddies, but you know what I am."
And then she says,
"That doesn't matter.
"I'll fix that."
I thought,
"Oh, God.
"I'll try anything."
Sex.
Life.
Healing.
Sunlight.
Nature.
Magic.
Serenity.
Spirit.
The first Gay Pride flag was made by
a man named Gilbert Baker in 1978.
He gave a meaning
to each color.
This man was President.
This was invented.
This is what
movies looked like.
Pets.
On November 27th, 1978,
Harvey Milk was shot and killed.
One week after, my father
opened his annual museum Christmas exhibit.
He collected stuffed animals
from people in the community
and he put them on display.
My father printed a quote
from The Velveteen Rabbit
in large type on the wall.
The stuffed rabbit asked,
"What is real?"
And the rabbit asked,
"Does it hurt?"
And the horse said,
"Sometimes."
"Does it happen all at once?"
"It takes a long time.
"Generally,
by the time you are real,
"most of your hair
has been loved off,
"your eyes dropped out,
and you get loose in the joints.
"But these things
don't matter at all
"because you are real.
"You can't be ugly except to people
who don't understand. "
Andy's moving in.
Yeah?
Is that a good idea?
Just be happy
about it. Huh?
Come on.
This is the idea, is
that it's the history of sadness.
Here could be your...
This could be your...
You know, you're
gonna need a big CD box.
Four billion years ago,
Earth begins.
And the idea is that sadness
has not yet been created, but...
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry, too.
Well, that went well.
Come on, Arthur.
This is the living room.
Dining room.
There are my... I have some
boxes. They're my parents.
My mom.
Hal, Georgia, meet Anna.
Anna, Hal, Georgia.
Hi.
- These are the stairs.
- Oh, yeah?
They go up.
I emptied these for you.
I'll get your case.
Are you okay?
I couldn't sleep and I
didn't want to bother you.
I was...
I was nervous
and excited.
I kept thinking, maybe,
I'm not so lost.
Why were you
crying yesterday?
You okay?
Yeah.
You look so unhappy.
Well, are you happy?
Here?
Maybe I'm not
perfect at it.
I don't really know
what I'm doing.
But I wanna be here.
I don't know, Anna.
I don't think this is what
I'm supposed to feel like.
Okay.
I will go back
to New York then.
Hal, you don't need to come in
for any more treatments.
Is there something wrong?
It's best
you stay home.
Hospice can
help you more now.
Any more treatments
would just
cause more pain.
Yeah, I understand.
I'm sorry. I wish
we could do more.
No, no, you've, you've done
an excellent job, Dr. Long.
And thank you
for coming to the party.
You always wanted to hold my hand
when you were little.
I couldn't, you know. I was
afraid it would look funny.
I wanted to be
close, you know,
and my father certainly
was never close with me.
God, I hope
I wasn't like that.
I can barely remember you
from when I was little.
I guess I was at work.
Look at the hand
of the man in the brushwork.
It's as if you can feel the spirit
of the artist, if he's very good.
And his every gesture.
It's like a sort of
structural entity in...
I mean that in the...
Let's go home.
...largest use
of that word.
What about your father? What
will he possibly do without us?
Georgia,
are you leaving?
Yes, Mary.
It's an emergency.
Oliver's appendix
has ruptured.
Oh, dear.
He's a very composed child.
You point,
I'll drive.
Ah! The infamous left.
And?
Left again. Going in circles. I like it.
Hey, it's me.
Leave me a message.
Anna?
Where are you?
- Hey.
- Hey.
All right, here.
All right, Arthur, okay.
You're gonna
look after Elliot.
I'll be back in
a couple of days.
Good luck.
All right.
Okay? Thanks.
He remembers me.
Hey.
Hey.
Look, I'm so sorry,
but I'm at your front door.
I'm in New York.
I am in Los Angeles.
You're in LA?
You said you were
coming here.
Yeah. But I didn't leave.
Fuck. I'm in
your building.
Okay. See the window
near to the radiator?
There is
a hide-a-key behind it.
Okay, I'm inside.
Well, there's,
like, nothing here.
No.
This is my kitchen.
It's where I eat.
This is my bathroom.
It's very fancy.
Outside my window
is my neighbor's roof.
The room at the end
is my bedroom.
That's my closet.
Those are my clothes.
My pictures.
Why do you leave everyone?
Why did you let me go?
Maybe because
I don't really believe that it's gonna work.
And then I make sure
that it doesn't work.
Isn't Juan's hair
wonderful?
Thanks.
I use this
great mousse.
Well, it's terrific.
Do you wanna
try something?
Just a little bit?
I don't think so.
Come on. Just try a
little bit. It'll be fun.
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
How do you do it?
Okay. I'm gonna
show you how.
- There.
- Is that it?
How do I look?
Great.
You look great.
Oliver.
He's gone.
Once you make the call,
you have less than
an hour before two men
come and place
the body into a bag.
They charge $1,485
for a cremation
and deliver the remains
in a small, metal container
the size of a jar
of peanut butter.
You will need to get
a death certificate.
You will need to make copies
and send them to cancel every credit card,
phone account, utility, gym membership,
every insurance policy,
mortgage,
to settle their taxes.
You will have all their mail
forwarded to your address.
You will write
their obituary.
You run it with a photo
in the paper for $2 a word.
You'll wonder if it's right.
You'll throw a lot
of their stuff away.
You'll bring a lot of
their stuff to your house.
This is the photo my mother kept
in her bedroom.
When I was a kid, I thought
that was my arm giving her daisies.
Now I make a new mistake and I think
it's her arm giving me the daisies, saying,
"Here. Here is
simple and happy.
"That's what
I meant to give you. "
- Hey.
- Hey.
Arthur.
Hey.
Thank you.
Thanks.
Sure.
Come on.
It's because I'm gay.
Isn't it?
What?
You never called
or came to see me.
No.
No, it's because my father
loved you so much.
Arthur.
Hey.
Hey, how have you been?
How have you been?
- Hey.
- Hi.
Hey.
Come in, come in.
The living room.
Dining room.
Crazy picture.
Yeah.
- Can I read it?
- Sure.
"I'm looking for sex
"with the hope
it turns into
"friendship
or a relationship.
"But I don't
insist on monogamy.
"I'm an old senior guy, 78,
but I'm attractive and horny.
"I'm an art historian,
now retired.
"And in addition to art,
I like houses, gardens,
"parties and walking
with my Jack Russell.
"I'm 5'11", 160 pounds.
"I'm trim, gray hair,
blue eyes, hairy cheest."
- Chest.
- Chest?
"I like giving and..."
And what?
"I like giving
and getting rubdowns
"and then going into
the mutual soft stuff."
"I have a nice house with
food, drinks, friend and me.
"If you are willing
to try an older guy,
"let's meet and see
what happens."
He didn't give up.
What happens now?
I don't know.
How does that work?
Yeah, yeah.
Okay. Okay.
This is for our friend,
Hal Fields.
Hal, we love you.
Arthur, you're coming to
live with me now, okay?
This is my car.
This is the dining room where
people come and eat sometimes.
This is the living room.
That's the bathroom.
This is 2003.
This is what
the sun looks like,
and the stars, nature...
This is the President.
And this is the sun in 1955.
And the stars,
and nature,
and cars and phones
and movies and the President.
These are what
pets looked like.
These are fireworks.
This was smoking.
This is what it looked like
when people kissed.
When they were happy.
When they were sad.
My parents got
married in 1955.
He was a museum director
and she fixed up old houses.
They had a child and they
stayed married for 44 years,
until she died in their bed,
after four months of cancer,
and eating French toast for every meal,
and watching
the Teletubbies every day,
and confusing white straws
for her cigarettes,
and skipping back
and forth through time inside her head.
Six months later,
my father told me he was gay.
He had just turned 75.
I'm gay.
I always remember him wearing a purple
sweater when he told me this,
but, actually,
he wore a robe.
I'm gay.
I'm gay.
I loved your mother, but...
...now I want to
explore this side.
I don't wanna be
just theoretically gay.
I wanna do
something about it.
I wanna do
something about it.
I wanna do
something about it.
He changed
all his clothes.
He got a boyfriend, Andy,
a physical trainer
who was also studying
for his professional
pyrotechnic license.
Since I came out to my
father, he never speaks to me.
That's why I've been always
attracted to older men.
He found an out gay priest
to guide him spiritually.
He saw a therapist
for the first time.
He joined the Prime Timers,
movie night,
Los Angeles Pride.
And then four years after he came out,
he died in this room.
Look, it's lonely out here, so you'd
better learn how to talk with me.
I know. I know.
Calm. Calm, calm breaths.
Calm.
Oliver!
Please help me
with all these ropes.
Pop, Pop,
stop, stop, stop.
You're gonna
hurt yourself.
Mr. Fields, we're gonna have
to secure your arms again, okay?
You two married?
No, Pop.
Why not? She's great.
Yeah, she's a great nurse in the
hospital, but we don't really know her.
You're very high
on drugs.
Yes, you've always had
some very good reasons,
...haven't you?
- No, Pop,
I just don't wanna be
like you and Mom.
Well...
Thank you.
Oliver?
Ollie, you can do better.
That's good.
Go and have your own
experiences with your own people.
I'll be right here.
I'm a human.
I'm not a dog.
And you're a Jack Russell
and that's a breed.
Your personality was created
by this guy, John Russell,
who was a hunting
enthusiast in the 1800s.
And he bred your ancestors for their
stamina and their courage for the hunt.
You think you're you when
you wanna chase the foxes,
but other people planted
that in you years ago.
And now,
somewhat arbitrarily,
you're considered
very cute by us humans.
And we keep breeding you not
to chase foxes, but to be cute.
And we put you in
television shows and movies,
and you're chasing
tennis balls
because they're as close to
a fox as you're gonna get.
- Hey, Liz.
- Hey.
Let's read this one.
I found a lot of books.
Yeah, all right.
Give me
the flashlight.
- Nice.
- That's nice.
Andy brought those for you.
- Oh, yeah?
- Yeah.
Who did that painting?
Well, I don't know. It's
just a painting on the wall.
And these?
They're
just photos, Pop.
But how do they relate
to the exhibit?
They're just personal
photos. They're not art.
And that's the
water sprinkler thing.
Well, it's beautiful.
What is?
Putting the Japanese Gardens
there. It's just beautiful.
Hal?
Andy!
I brought
something for you.
We made
a recording for you.
Oh, God.
This is for our friend, Hal Fields.
Oh, my God.
- Huh?
- Yeah.
Jesus, Liz. Another
band that wants portraits.
Well, at least
it pays the rent.
You do something decent once
and that's all people ever want.
Hi, Liz.
- Oliver?
- Yeah?
The pen is not
your friend.
The paper is
not your friend.
The party is your friend.
We're your friends.
Your friends
are your friends.
Okay?
I've got the skills
He's got the moves
I've got the moves.
- I've got the skills.
- I've got the skills.
Arthur, you haven't been
invited to this party.
You're gonna stay
and look after the house.
You remember when
Oliver was funny,
and he could actually, like,
talk in complete sentences?
Funny, funny...
I don't think...
Funny. Yeah.
Fun. But not funny, unless,
like, serious is funny.
Then he's fucking
hilarious. But...
Lovable. Lovable.
Yeah, very lovable.
You are very lovable.
Hey, what's up!
Step aside.
Step aside.
He is so cute!
Does he do tricks?
No.
His name is Arthur.
He doesn't do tricks.
- No?
- No.
Arthur. Sit.
Oh, my God!
Hi. Shake.
Oh, my God.
He's so cute. I want him.
Does it make you
feel powerful to order my dog around?
Maybe give you
a sense of power?
You're
being a therapist!
Freud!
Thanks, yeah.
Very good.
Bye, Arthur.
Well, I didn't ask for this.
Who would ask for this?
This color, this nose,
this cheek, this chin.
You know,
this is my life.
This isn't a story.
This isn't a joke.
Yeah.
I'm so glad
you came, Doc.
Just really good to get
this stuff off my chest.
I'm sorry.
Our time is up
for this week.
Thank you
for coming in.
Oh.
I was just...
I was gonna take
a break, actually.
Okay.
I guess we should
start with your mother.
Well, then,
your father.
I don't understand.
You can't talk?
Is it a mental problem?
Do you need analysis?
It's a physical problem.
I was doing such
a good job of hiding it.
How could you tell?
Clearly,
I'm gonna need a drink.
You?
You stay here. Yeah.
- No, it's not a natural color for a chicken.
- No.
And you see what happens when
you free yourself from the cage,
walk away
from the factory?
You just have no real color.
You're like...
Hey, can you...
Hey, there.
Uh-oh. One.
Uh-oh. Two.
Two drinks.
What does that mean...
One, two.
Well, that's two people.
- Two people. A girl and a guy?
- Hopefully.
Yeah. Wow.
Making moves.
Hello?
- Oliver?
- Yeah.
I'm not sorry I woke you.
I went to Act Bar tonight.
- You did?
- Yeah.
They had some
wonderfully loud music.
What kind of
music is that?
Probably house music.
House music. Okay.
House, house music.
Did you meet anyone?
- Did you meet anyone?
- No.
Young gay men don't go
for older gay men.
You have it easy.
Would you
like to dance?
Hello.
Can I give you
my number?
Thanks.
I feel bad dragging Arthur to
the party. I should get home.
It was really
nice meeting you.
Au revoir.
Yeah.
Hello?
Is that you?
One beep means "yes"?
I've always wanted to have a phone
call with someone who doesn't talk.
You wanna do something?
Now?
Okay, I'm parked just
right up the street.
Okay. You point,
I'll drive.
This way?
Nice place.
Oh, my mother. My mother
died five years ago.
Oh, man.
Oh, you spoke.
I'm not supposed to.
My father died two
months ago, almost three.
He was gay.
He was gay the whole
time they were married.
He came out
after my mother died,
and he was
Sorry.
Can we just sleep?
Sure. Sure.
Oliver.
How long are you here
when you get back?
A year?
A month?
Right. And then?
You're filming here.
Acting.
And after?
Just somewhere else.
Where?
Yes.
Hello, house.
Hello, Oliver.
Jesus, Pop,
you get so much mail.
Hal, it's remarkable how
well you've recovered
from being on
the ventilator.
But?
The bronchoscopy
revealed a mass
about the size of a quarter
located in your lower right lung.
I'm afraid the biopsy
showed it's cancerous.
Uh-huh. I see.
It appears
to have spread
to the large hilar lymph
nodes in your chest and liver.
With the already weakened state of
your heart and lungs,
surgery isn't possible,
given its location.
We can start
radiation treatments
and see if you're
strong enough for chemo.
You will be able
to go home.
Do you have
any questions?
No.
Thank you.
I'm sorry.
Well, let's not rush
out and tell everyone.
Andy?
No need to
get him up a tree.
Can you read me
something?
"The Brazilian ballet star is already
known not only as a skilled partner,
"but also as a gifted
and versatile dancer
"who adeptly fields roles ranging
from the strictly classical..."
Yeah, he's fine.
He sleeps on your bed.
But is he eating?
Yeah. Yeah, he's eating.
Oh, God, I worry
so much about...
Oh. Here we are.
What have you
got in there?
A slug.
Andy, you can't bring
that kind of thing...
You cannot.
I can. Look.
Fuck you.
It's time for inspection.
- Hello, Mr. Fields.
- Hello.
I'm Andy.
Hal's boyfriend.
I'm Sophia.
You know, I have the right to
be here as much as anyone else.
Go take a walk.
Calm yourself.
What was all that?
Andy hasn't
had it easy, too.
Be nice to him.
Excuse me.
Andy,
where did you get these?
Guys, guys,
this is to us.
Cheers.
Cheers.
Drinking is not
allowed in the room.
It's not?
I'm sorry.
No, no, no.
No, no.
She's a wonderful nurse.
Here's to healthcare.
To healthcare!
What did you do with
my father? He was so polite.
Well, I invited him, but
he never returns my calls.
Two, four,
six, eight.
That's it? That's
all you're gonna tell me.
I'm gonna meet her
at her hotel again, okay?
You happy?
Yeah. I'm very happy.
Are you happy?
Here's eight.
We haven't actually had a
conversation yet, so, you know...
You're thinking
about her all the time.
And you know
that because?
Because you're not
talking about it.
I know you.
It's true.
It's embarrassing. I'm 38,
falling for a girl again.
It's like I lost
the instructions
or I never had them.
Where's Pop?
At the museum.
Is something wrong
with you guys?
What, are you
in the FBI?
No.
CIA?
No.
- KGB?
- No.
SLA? PTA?
No.
BMW?
There's nothing wrong
with me and Pop.
When you feel bad,
you go into your room
and scream as loud as you
can for a minute or two
and then it's out of you.
It's called catharsis.
I don't feel
like screaming.
You will.
What the fuck is that?
L-E-It. Elliot.
Well, that's ridiculous.
I know.
You're not
very supportive.
Well, it's just like
copying something
that someone, like, did
Well, yeah. I'm a part of a
tradition of civil disobedience.
Something bigger
than myself.
How's it work?
You have to shake it.
Shake it.
What was that?
Historical consciousness.
Something bigger than myself.
Let's do it again.
Okay, but
when you see her,
don't tell her that you painted
historical consciousness on the wall.
He's sweet.
He misses your dad.
Maybe we could just
talk for a second.
Right.
Well, my name is Anna.
You're worried
you can't trust me
because you
don't know who I am.
I get it.
That makes sense to me.
Oliver, stop it.
This music's old.
It's black.
Black music's the deepest
'cause they suffered the most.
Them and the Jews.
In my next life,
I'm gonna marry
a good hot-blooded Jew.
Someone full of emotion.
I'm Jewish, right?
You're a quarter.
I'm a half.
Your father's none.
He has the least emotions.
You'll have more
emotions than him.
But I'll have
the most emotions.
You get to play chauffeur, but
only to the bottom of the hill.
You're turning into
a wonderful driver.
Excuse me,
Mrs. Fields?
What, you're not allowed
to interact with the art?
Well, it's just that...
You too? You like
being a good citizen?
No.
Can you toss me
my camisole?
No, my camisole.
Camisole?
You don't know
what a camisole is?
I was brought up
by these animals,
and they didn't
like questions.
They were very frowned upon.
So, I had to guess.
You can ask me anything.
Anything?
What's that there?
- That's a tree.
- Yeah.
- And cars.
- Uh-huh.
Another building
like this one.
Right.
People in the building like us.
Half of them think things
will never work out.
The other half
believe in magic.
It's like a war
between them.
How do you know
so much about people?
Oh.
Well, you have to learn
how to read their faces.
For example...
Here is mad.
Happy.
Sometimes
it's just nothing.
Oh, yeah?
This is nothing.
And they are good
at looking one way
and being another way.
You don't know me.
I like that.
No, that's not true.
Oh, yeah?
Yeah, you have blonde hair that goes
down to about here.
You smoke in non-smoking rooms.
You bite sometimes.
Okay, open your eyes.
Yeah, you drive on the sidewalk.
You were raised by animals.
Sometimes you look very alone, like
you just got here.
Yeah, you see,
you don't know me at all.
Someone flashy walks into your life
and you're just gonna fall for it.
No, it doesn't work like that. There
are other steps, it's complicated.
Yeah. Me, too.
What happened
with Michelle?
I don't know. You know.
She seemed great.
She was great.
Well, maybe you should take
out a personal ad, you know,
where you can explain
your situation.
My situation?
Yeah.
I mean, you wanna be in a
relationship and you can't stay in one.
That's your fatherly
advice, personal ads?
Well...
A lot of people use them.
I did.
What?
If Andy wasn't going to be
monogamous, why should I be?
Jesus, Pop.
- Jesus yourself.
- Yeah?
You look great, Hal.
So handsome.
Hello, house.
Hello, Hal.
Hello, Hal.
Oh, God, what have you got this time?
It's a green
caterpillar.
No, no, no, you don't
have a green caterpillar.
Yeah, I do.
Oh, my God.
Gross! Oh, Jesus.
Hey, you going?
Yeah.
Michael's in town.
Oh.
Right.
I thought he was
your boyfriend.
At least I'm
the number one boyfriend.
Pop.
My stomach.
All right, come on.
Come on.
Well, let's say...
Arthur, down.
Let's say,
since you were little,
and you always dreamed
of some day getting a lion?
And you wait and you wait
and you wait and you wait,
and the lion doesn't come.
Then along
comes a giraffe.
You can be alone or you
can be with the giraffe.
I'd wait for the lion.
That's why
I worry about you.
Here.
You see, you'd like me to
be with someone like me.
I like Andy because
he isn't like me.
He's fun.
Hey, what'd you get?
Liv Ullmann.
Very serious.
And I found
this crazy book.
That's kind of
a classic American thing.
Maybe we can figure out some
classic American things to do.
Yeah.
- Like 75.
- Mmm-hmm.
Or 75 all the
way through...
Through 80.
Louise Brooks,
star of silent screen,
effectively banned from
Hollywood in the early '30s,
ended up working as a
salesgirl at Saks Fifth Avenue.
I love her.
And Veronica Lake.
Was a pin-up model
and a film star.
Success was short-lived,
a series of broken marriages.
She struggled with mental
illness and alcoholism.
She died of hepatitis
at the age of fifty-three.
All these actor
stories end sad.
I can tell you
that already.
That's not a good thing.
So. Now I want
real Mexican food.
And I want to try page
forty-six.
- No.
- Yeah.
Really?
It's really good.
What do you think?
It's so good.
- It's good.
- Mmm.
- I wasn't sure you'd like it.
- Why?
You're an actress and
staying in that fancy hotel.
I like this place.
I used to love hotels.
But now I'm always in a new apartment
or in another hotel somewhere.
How do you keep hold of
friends? Or boyfriends?
Makes it very easy
to end up alone.
To leave people.
You can stay in the same place and
still find ways to leave people.
You are like that?
It's what you do?
So, we are the same?
Yeah, I guess so.
Oh, did I wake you?
Yeah. Thank you, Maria.
And now that you're here,
would you please
put those up there?
What are you... Pop.
What...
I'm reorganizing.
Prednisone
makes you crazy.
I'm just not sleepy.
I feel great.
Pop, you should rest.
Soon as I finish these
papers. Right, papers?
Right, Hal. As
soon as you're done, you can rest.
What?
Nothing.
You're pretty.
No.
Yeah.
Jewish girls
are not pretty.
They can be interesting
or cute, but not pretty.
You're kidding, right?
That's what
my mom told me.
She did not.
No, you're right.
This girl at school
told me that,
and I went home and my mom
said, "Anna, who told you that?"
This is what it looks like when Anna
tells me about being Jewish in 2003.
And when I tell her
my mother was Jewish.
And that my father
turned in his gay badge
when my mother turned
in her Jewish badge.
And they got married
in 1955.
My mother didn't know she was Jewish
until she was thirteen.
It was 1938.
This is what
people looked like.
And lions and giraffes.
This man was
the Man of the Year.
Her father tried to hide
that they were Jewish.
This is the swim team
that asked her to leave
once they discovered
that she was Jewish.
This is what pretty
looked like in 1938.
My father realized
he was gay when he was thirteen.
It was 1938.
This is what
pretty looked like.
This is the high school
where they first met.
This is the war
they both went to.
And this man was popular
when they met again.
This is the only place my father could hide
and have sex in the '50s.
My father said if you got caught
by the vice squad,
you could lose everything.
This is everything.
My father laid down
on a couch like this
and told the psychiatrist
all his problems in 1955.
The doctor told him
that homosexuality was a mental illness,
but it could be cured.
Not everyone got cured.
This is where
my parents lived in 1955.
And this is the home
where the first gay-rights
group were secretly meeting.
While they were
reciting their vows here in this church,
Allen Ginsberg was
writing his famous poem,
Howl, blocks away
in this room.
"...who let themselves be
fucked in the ass
"by saintly motorcyclists,
"and screamed with joy,
"who blew and were blown
by those human seraphim, the sailors,
"caresses of Atlantic
and Caribbean love..."
Just do the portrait of them.
It's an album cover, right?
That's all they want. Yeah?
Yeah.
Right.
- Here, Pop.
- Oh, God.
I know, I know.
Come on.
Hey, no, no, no. That's Gay
Pride day stuff. Just leave those.
All right.
And that's gay book club.
You better leave those, too.
But what about the chair?
Is the chair gay?
The chair is not gay.
Obviously.
Pop, Pop, the cord
won't go so far.
To hell with it.
Oh, what's that?
Now that you're
out of the hospital,
you'll have to exercise,
get you back into shape.
That's a great idea.
Okay, let's try it.
I'll show you how.
Yeah, later on.
I'm gonna make
myself some tea.
Okay. I'll go clean it up.
It's a little bit...
Your mother's vase
needs some flowers.
You need to tell Andy
that you're not well.
Pop, you're just out of the
hospital. You should take it easy.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
You'll tell him,
won't you?
Me?
Please.
Hey.
You know, I tried to
have sex with women?
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
I just wanted you to know, I
tried. It just... It didn't work.
Hey, I don't have
a problem with gay guys.
Have you had
sex with a man?
No.
I heard that if a man hasn't
had sex with another man,
he's always
afraid of gay men.
You know,
they're a threat.
I don't know, Andy.
I didn't want you
to feel threatened.
I don't wanna
have sex with you.
What I do,
most people wouldn't
even call it sex anyway.
Okay.
Okay.
Hey.
I couldn't tell him.
That's okay.
No, it's not.
You can't hide this
from him. He loves you.
For someone with so much
relationship advice,
you seem awfully alone.
Just act natural.
When he's not looking,
we'll make a run for it.
Okay?
Don't, don't, don't.
It's my dad.
He's that bad?
I'm gonna
let you be me.
Okay.
Annie?
You never call me back.
I'm busy. I'm shooting all the time.
You know, I can't
stop thinking about...
You know, about it.
Doing it.
Doing what?
Killing myself.
You are the only one
I can tell that to.
You should tell Mom
about that, not me.
You are my girl.
Now I'll have
to kill you.
Just as it was
going so well.
I know. I'm sorry.
Really?
Hey, Anna.
Hey, Oliver.
How do you feel
about vandalism?
I don't know.
Pretty okay.
Oliver,
don't write any of that serious
stuff, okay? Just something funny.
Girls like funny.
- Okay?
- Okay.
You know what?
Here, give me Arthur.
We'll just stay here
and get arrested.
You know, that's good.
- Good?
- Mmm.
You okay?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
You okay?
Yeah. I'm gonna stay
here with my new friend.
Okay.
Anna?
I'm trying
to impress you.
Really?
It's working.
Arthur, Arthur.
No, no, no, no.
I'm sorry.
No problem. No problem.
What's with this card?
- Do you mind?
- No.
- Thank you.
- All right.
He looked like your dad.
Yeah.
Somewhere along the line
he stopped admitting to
himself that he was sick.
Oliver, this is Blake.
He's a wonderful man.
Look. I finally
got a tattoo.
Registration purposes,
of course.
Good for him.
We did
a lot of shopping.
Bought all these books.
Hello, Hal.
Hello.
New clothes.
He was obsessed
with Staples.
Bought a lot of plants.
A lot of parties.
Well, glad you
could make it.
I thought I was
cooking dinner.
It's movie night,
you idiot.
Hal,
you look wonderful.
I'm turning the corner
on this thing.
- Hi, Oliver.
- Hey, Oliver.
Hey.
These political
letter-writing parties.
There was an out
gay congressman he was supporting.
He hired a secretary
he would dictate to.
And one May morning...
He started telling everyone
he was getting better.
Why are you telling them
you're turning the corner?
Well...
You have
stage four cancer.
It's not as bad
as it sounds.
Pop,
there is no stage five.
That's not what it means.
Well, then what
does it mean?
It just means that it's been
through three other stages.
What movie
are we watching?
The Times of Harvey Milk,
the first openly gay politician...
Yeah, I know
who Harvey Milk is.
Good, good.
What really
counts is that a person care.
Does a person care
about his city or her city?
Is a person sensitive...
Wrote an essay
about religion.
"Eventually,
Jesus grew old.
"He could no longer walk far
"and he could no longer
preach in a loud voice.
"One day he announced to his
apostles that he was departing.
"The three disciples
prayed with him,
"gave him water,
bathed and fed him.
"After gasping for breath
for several days,
"one morning,
just as dawn came,
"Jesus passed away."
You rewrote
Jesus' death?
It was far too violent.
We need new stories.
For the first time
I saw him really in love.
He sounds amazing.
But that must have
been crazy for you.
Anna?
I couldn't sleep
and I wanted to walk around.
You've lost so much.
What if I can't
make it further?
If this is too much,
then we should
just stop.
Wait, wait.
Wait, wait, wait.
I don't wanna stop.
Oh!
- Ready?
- Yeah!
- Again!
- Again?
- Again!
- Again!
Fuck!
Fuck!
Fuck!
Fuck!
Fuck!
Fuck!
Fuck!
- Fuck!
- Fuck!
Arthur.
Arthur!
Come on,
doggie, doggie.
Arthur.
I'm gonna go this way.
I'm gonna go farther out.
Whoo!
Ah! You're awake.
Arthur says
you have to get up.
He says
it's his day off.
- He speaks to you, too.
- Yeah.
He says now. Now. Now.
Your English
is not so perfect.
And he said 10 minutes.
You okay?
You did really well.
Yeah, I can't believe
that was your first time.
It was your first time.
You watching all the humans
going around and around.
Excuse me, sir. There's
no dogs allowed in the building.
You need to remove him
from the premises, please.
If I leave him on his own,
he loses all control.
I'm sorry. There's no dogs
allowed in the building.
- Yeah, yeah, but...
- Come on, please.
If I leave him in the car, he cries,
he howls. I can't leave him in the car.
I'm sorry, no.
He needs to be removed.
I don't know what she's
saying and I don't like it.
You need to remove the dog
from the premises.
She's just talking in French. She's
saying, "It's okay, it's such a small dog."
- You're gonna call the authorities?
- All right, you know what?
- She's calling the authorities.
- Steal the skates.
Steal the skates.
- Okay?
- Okay.
- Come on, Arthur.
- Faster, faster.
Okay. Sorry.
Excuse me.
Hi.
I can't do it.
He doesn't always
call this much.
Sometimes he's fine.
Yeah, well.
He shouldn't
do this to you.
Even if we don't answer
the phone, he's still here.
I run somewhere new and...
You're leaving
here soon.
Yeah.
I think you should
come to my house.
Move in with me.
Would you want
a strange girl like me?
Yeah, a lot.
Do you cook?
Yes.
I would love that.
I'm really gonna
have to kill you now.
Mmm. Why?
Because I'm falling
in love with you.
Anna and I are
in a relationship in 2003.
This is what
the sun looks like
and the stars.
This is what it looks like when we eat.
When we tell each other
the stories in our heads.
I was born in 1965.
Anna was born in 1971.
This is what
the sun looked like.
Her pets.
Her parents.
She left home
when she was sixteen.
She lived here and here
and here and here.
She had three serious relationships.
She left all of them.
I had four serious relationships.
I left them, too.
Or let them fall apart.
We didn't go to this war.
We didn't have to
hide to have sex.
Our good fortune
allowed us to feel
a sadness that our parents
didn't have time for,
and a happiness that
I never saw with them.
We didn't know how we learned
the stories in our heads,
but sometimes
they stop running
and I can really see
Anna's eyes in 2003.
Her ears.
Her feet.
This is what it looks like when she says,
"I love you," in 2003.
This is what it looks
like when she cries.
When she tells me there's
always a new empty room waiting for her.
They used to
make her feel free.
Now they make her feel
the opposite of free.
- Last one.
- Oh, Lord.
I know.
There.
This is for you. Yeah.
Now, that means
Gay Pride.
Yeah, everyone
knows that.
No, they don't.
Yeah. Everyone
knows about that.
No. Of course not.
Don't be silly.
Pop, pretty much everyone
knows that that means Gay Pride.
- Do they really?
- Yeah.
Did you know?
About me?
No.
I just thought you
and Mom weren't in love.
We loved each other.
But you were gay
the whole time.
Well, I worked
hard not to be.
For 44 years?
Yeah.
I knew I was gay, though.
I mean, at parties I'd be staring
at the husbands and not the wives.
What about sex?
Well, she didn't think
I was the greatest lover.
But we made do.
Look, I liked my life.
The museum, our house.
That's what I wanted.
And Mom.
You wanted Mom,
too, right?
Yes!
Stop that.
She proposed to me,
you know.
I said,
"Look, I love you, and we're great
buddies, but you know what I am."
And then she says,
"That doesn't matter.
"I'll fix that."
I thought,
"Oh, God.
"I'll try anything."
Sex.
Life.
Healing.
Sunlight.
Nature.
Magic.
Serenity.
Spirit.
The first Gay Pride flag was made by
a man named Gilbert Baker in 1978.
He gave a meaning
to each color.
This man was President.
This was invented.
This is what
movies looked like.
Pets.
On November 27th, 1978,
Harvey Milk was shot and killed.
One week after, my father
opened his annual museum Christmas exhibit.
He collected stuffed animals
from people in the community
and he put them on display.
My father printed a quote
from The Velveteen Rabbit
in large type on the wall.
The stuffed rabbit asked,
"What is real?"
And the rabbit asked,
"Does it hurt?"
And the horse said,
"Sometimes."
"Does it happen all at once?"
"It takes a long time.
"Generally,
by the time you are real,
"most of your hair
has been loved off,
"your eyes dropped out,
and you get loose in the joints.
"But these things
don't matter at all
"because you are real.
"You can't be ugly except to people
who don't understand. "
Andy's moving in.
Yeah?
Is that a good idea?
Just be happy
about it. Huh?
Come on.
This is the idea, is
that it's the history of sadness.
Here could be your...
This could be your...
You know, you're
gonna need a big CD box.
Four billion years ago,
Earth begins.
And the idea is that sadness
has not yet been created, but...
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry, too.
Well, that went well.
Come on, Arthur.
This is the living room.
Dining room.
There are my... I have some
boxes. They're my parents.
My mom.
Hal, Georgia, meet Anna.
Anna, Hal, Georgia.
Hi.
- These are the stairs.
- Oh, yeah?
They go up.
I emptied these for you.
I'll get your case.
Are you okay?
I couldn't sleep and I
didn't want to bother you.
I was...
I was nervous
and excited.
I kept thinking, maybe,
I'm not so lost.
Why were you
crying yesterday?
You okay?
Yeah.
You look so unhappy.
Well, are you happy?
Here?
Maybe I'm not
perfect at it.
I don't really know
what I'm doing.
But I wanna be here.
I don't know, Anna.
I don't think this is what
I'm supposed to feel like.
Okay.
I will go back
to New York then.
Hal, you don't need to come in
for any more treatments.
Is there something wrong?
It's best
you stay home.
Hospice can
help you more now.
Any more treatments
would just
cause more pain.
Yeah, I understand.
I'm sorry. I wish
we could do more.
No, no, you've, you've done
an excellent job, Dr. Long.
And thank you
for coming to the party.
You always wanted to hold my hand
when you were little.
I couldn't, you know. I was
afraid it would look funny.
I wanted to be
close, you know,
and my father certainly
was never close with me.
God, I hope
I wasn't like that.
I can barely remember you
from when I was little.
I guess I was at work.
Look at the hand
of the man in the brushwork.
It's as if you can feel the spirit
of the artist, if he's very good.
And his every gesture.
It's like a sort of
structural entity in...
I mean that in the...
Let's go home.
...largest use
of that word.
What about your father? What
will he possibly do without us?
Georgia,
are you leaving?
Yes, Mary.
It's an emergency.
Oliver's appendix
has ruptured.
Oh, dear.
He's a very composed child.
You point,
I'll drive.
Ah! The infamous left.
And?
Left again. Going in circles. I like it.
Hey, it's me.
Leave me a message.
Anna?
Where are you?
- Hey.
- Hey.
All right, here.
All right, Arthur, okay.
You're gonna
look after Elliot.
I'll be back in
a couple of days.
Good luck.
All right.
Okay? Thanks.
He remembers me.
Hey.
Hey.
Look, I'm so sorry,
but I'm at your front door.
I'm in New York.
I am in Los Angeles.
You're in LA?
You said you were
coming here.
Yeah. But I didn't leave.
Fuck. I'm in
your building.
Okay. See the window
near to the radiator?
There is
a hide-a-key behind it.
Okay, I'm inside.
Well, there's,
like, nothing here.
No.
This is my kitchen.
It's where I eat.
This is my bathroom.
It's very fancy.
Outside my window
is my neighbor's roof.
The room at the end
is my bedroom.
That's my closet.
Those are my clothes.
My pictures.
Why do you leave everyone?
Why did you let me go?
Maybe because
I don't really believe that it's gonna work.
And then I make sure
that it doesn't work.
Isn't Juan's hair
wonderful?
Thanks.
I use this
great mousse.
Well, it's terrific.
Do you wanna
try something?
Just a little bit?
I don't think so.
Come on. Just try a
little bit. It'll be fun.
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
How do you do it?
Okay. I'm gonna
show you how.
- There.
- Is that it?
How do I look?
Great.
You look great.
Oliver.
He's gone.
Once you make the call,
you have less than
an hour before two men
come and place
the body into a bag.
They charge $1,485
for a cremation
and deliver the remains
in a small, metal container
the size of a jar
of peanut butter.
You will need to get
a death certificate.
You will need to make copies
and send them to cancel every credit card,
phone account, utility, gym membership,
every insurance policy,
mortgage,
to settle their taxes.
You will have all their mail
forwarded to your address.
You will write
their obituary.
You run it with a photo
in the paper for $2 a word.
You'll wonder if it's right.
You'll throw a lot
of their stuff away.
You'll bring a lot of
their stuff to your house.
This is the photo my mother kept
in her bedroom.
When I was a kid, I thought
that was my arm giving her daisies.
Now I make a new mistake and I think
it's her arm giving me the daisies, saying,
"Here. Here is
simple and happy.
"That's what
I meant to give you. "
- Hey.
- Hey.
Arthur.
Hey.
Thank you.
Thanks.
Sure.
Come on.
It's because I'm gay.
Isn't it?
What?
You never called
or came to see me.
No.
No, it's because my father
loved you so much.
Arthur.
Hey.
Hey, how have you been?
How have you been?
- Hey.
- Hi.
Hey.
Come in, come in.
The living room.
Dining room.
Crazy picture.
Yeah.
- Can I read it?
- Sure.
"I'm looking for sex
"with the hope
it turns into
"friendship
or a relationship.
"But I don't
insist on monogamy.
"I'm an old senior guy, 78,
but I'm attractive and horny.
"I'm an art historian,
now retired.
"And in addition to art,
I like houses, gardens,
"parties and walking
with my Jack Russell.
"I'm 5'11", 160 pounds.
"I'm trim, gray hair,
blue eyes, hairy cheest."
- Chest.
- Chest?
"I like giving and..."
And what?
"I like giving
and getting rubdowns
"and then going into
the mutual soft stuff."
"I have a nice house with
food, drinks, friend and me.
"If you are willing
to try an older guy,
"let's meet and see
what happens."
He didn't give up.
What happens now?
I don't know.
How does that work?