Ben Is Back (2018) Movie Script
1
[SOLEMN INSTRUMENTAL
MUSIC PLAYING]
[WATER TRICKLING]
[BIRDS CHIRPING]
[CHORAL GROUP SINGING]
Earth stood hard as iron
Water like a stone
Snow had fallen
Snow on snow
Snow on snow
[WHISPERING]
Stand up straight.
Meant to be quiet.
[CHORAL GROUP CONTINUES]
In the bleak midwinter
- Liam! Liam!
- Ba-a-a!
Long, long ago
- Ba-a-a!
- Sh-sh-sh!
- Hi!
- What are you doing?
Ba-a-a!
Ba-a-a!
Heaven cannot hold Him
Nor earth sustain
[TEACHER] OK, everyone
into your position.
I'm missing a sheep
and an angel.
Has anyone...
[TEACHER]
Oh, there you are.
Liam, Lacey.
Do you wanna
come join us?
[LACEY]
Not really.
[TEACHER]
But we need you.
[WHISPERING]
What?
Do you know how we come
to church once a year?
- Do you wanna come every Sunday?
- [BOTH KIDS] No!
Sh-sh-sh! OK.
We have to make
tonight count.
- Go make me proud.
- [LIAM] OK.
[DOG BARKS]
[DOG BARKS]
[KEYS RATTLING]
[DOG BARKING]
[DOG BARKS]
[IVY SINGING]
The holly and the ivy
When they are
both full grown
[LIAM] Quiet!
Of all the trees that
are in the wood
- [HOLLY] Come on, where's your Christmas spirit, Liam?
- Quiet!
[IVY SINGING]
The rising of the sun
[LIAM]
Quiet!
And the running
of the deer
[BIRDS CAWING]
- [KIDS SHOUTING OVER EACH OTHER]
- Hey, you guys. You guys.
Good kids...
get better gifts.
[KIDS LAUGH]
Wait a minute.
You did not just do that.
I did. You noticed
that, didn't you?
- I did it because it works.
- That's not fair.
- It worked on you for years.
- You didn't do it to me.
- Always, always.
- [KIDS CHATTERING]
Look, we're home!
[LIAM AND LACEY CHEERING]
[LACEY]
What?
[IVY] What the...
[BIRDS CHIRPING]
Oh, my God.
[KEYS RATTLING
AND DROPPING]
Mom. Mom.
No. Don't!
Oh, my God.
I can't believe it.
[BEN] Hi, Mom.
Oh, let me see you.
Is it you?
- [BEN LAUGHING]
- [LACEY] Is that Ben?
Come on. Look.
- [LIAM] It's Ben.
- [LACEY] Yeah, it is Ben.
[LACEY] Take hold of my hand.
Come on. Hurry!
Oh, my God.
I was just...
I was truly just wondering.
Just wondering what if.
[LIAM] Ben!
Don't let go.
[KIDS CHEERING]
[PHONE RINGING]
So, my roommate,
Timmy, has two years,
and is, like,
a recovery rockstar.
[BEN] And he offers me
a free ride.
And I was like,
"Yeah, I'm down."
But I'm thinkin', there's no way
my sponsor's gonna go for this.
But he did?
But he did because
that's how good I'm doing.
Wow, honey.
[BEN] So, Timmy's mom and dad and
his little brother pick us up.
I'm squeezed in the middle.
They're very Christian.
They're all super healthy.
They don't even
drink caffeine.
[DOG BARKING]
[HOLLY]
Great.
Mom, Ben is feeding Ponce.
[BEN]
Oh, yeah. Guilty.
[IVY]
Bread is bad for his teeth.
I think a little
bit is OK, honey.
[HOLLY]
OK. Go on.
OK, so we're, like,
10 minutes into the ride,
and suddenly
there's this smell
that just hangs there.
And it's a...
[BEN] And just when
it starts to clear,
another cloud of... of
stink is unleashed.
- Wait, it's human?
- [BEN] Mm-hmm.
- Oh, my God.
- It was the silent but deadly kind.
[HOLLY]
Oh, my God.
That's the worst kind.
This is great.
So great.
You know, Ponce,
all of us in
the kitchen.
You happy.
Zip me, please.
[HOLLY]
Oh, you got one on.
Good job. OK.
Leave these on.
- OK? All right.
- [LIAM] Bye!
- Be smart.
- [LIAM] Bye!
[HOLLY]
All right.
- Then what happened?
- [BEN] OK, so,
we're trapped in the back and
the farts just keep on coming.
[SECURITY SYSTEM]
Front door.
And so, I'm thinking, surely
someone is gonna say sorry.
- Or excuse me...
- Excuse me. Yes.
Or, like, maybe
crack a window.
But, no, they act like
nothing is wrong.
Oh, my God.
So, I just said,
"You know, you can
let me out here."
[IVY]
Mom?
It's not that funny.
But it is.
So, I just hiked the
rest of the way home.
You didn't!
[BANG ON WINDOW
AND HOLLY SCREAMS]
[KIDS CHEERING]
Oh, they did it again. Ugh.
- [HOLLY] Rascals.
- All right. You're gonna regret this.
Oh, go get 'em.
[HOLLY]
The big brother.
[BEN, OUTSIDE]
Aah!
[BEN AND THE KIDS
SHOUTING OUTSIDE]
[BEN GRUNTING]
[BEN GRUNTING]
[KIDS SCREAMING]
[IVY]
Mom? Mom?
Did you see? He's gained
some weight and...
he's got the sparkle
back in his eyes.
He's clearly doing better.
Then why are you
hiding everything?
[HOLLY]
You know why.
[IVY]
Sad. Having to hide.
Well, I would do
the same for you.
But you'll never have to.
Sweetie, I've got a very
good feeling about this.
Well, I don't.
Listen. This time will
be different. You'll see.
It will.
[IVY] Mom?
Why is he here anyway?
Weren't we supposed to
go visit him tomorrow?
[SECURITY ALARM RINGING]
OK, you need to
go watch him.
No.
No, he'll think
I'm spying.
No, then just, uh, film
him on your phone then.
Hmm?
Are you serious?
Yes, Ivy.
Now.
[KIDS PLAYING WITH BEN]
- [BEN] Yeah?
- [LIAM] I want hot chocolate.
[KIDS CHATTERING]
[KIDS SHOUTING]
[BEN ROARING]
[DOG BARKING]
[LACEY]
Go, go, go!
[KIDS LAUGHING]
What are you doing?
[IVY] I'm making a video
of holiday highlights.
[KIDS SCREAMING AND LAUGHING]
- [LIAM] Run!
- [LACEY] No, hurry!
[PILLS RATTLING]
- [DOG BARKING]
- [LIAM] Hurry, hurry!
[LACEY SCREAMING INAUDIBLY]
[DOG BARKING]
[DOG BARKING]
[LACEY]
Come here, boy!
[LACEY]
Come on, Ponce!
[INAUDIBLE SHOUTING]
[LIAM] Let's go!
[KIDS SCREAMING]
[INDISTINCT KID'S CHATTER]
[LACEY]
Don't do that.
[LACEY]
No...
[SQUEAKING TOY]
[SINGING]
When Ben was ten
Lacy was a baby
When Ben was ten
Liam was a maybe
[LIAM]
What about Ivy?
[KIDS' LAUGHTER]
And now we're all here
So let's go crazy
Let's go crazy!
Who's gonna help me today?
[HOLLY]
Neal?
We're going crazy
I got it under control.
[NEAL] Ivy called, texted.
Why didn't you?
Let's go crazy
Let's go crazy!
Hey, Neal.
Hey, Ben.
How about 15 extra minutes of
screen time starting right now?
[LACEY AND LIAM]
Yay!
[LACEY]
We better hurry up!
I'm... I'm confused.
I thought we had
an understanding.
The therapists.
The doctors.
Everyone, even... even
you, agreed that it's in
your best interest
not to be home yet.
I know.
There's too many
triggers for you here.
That was months ago.
And, and, and
your sponsor said...
Please, let... let Ben
tell me, please.
Please, honey.
[BEN]
OK, I know...
I know I really fucked up
last Christmas.
[IVY]
And the one before that.
It's true.
[BEN] Yeah, I know I've made
a lot of mistakes.
But...
Now, since I'm doing so good,
and... and with all the support
I'm getting and...
w-with my sponsor?
I honestly didn't
think I'd ever...
feel this good again.
[BIRDS CHIRPING]
What? You don't believe me?
Sweetie, we do.
Which is why she hid all
the meds and the jewelry.
I was just removing
the temptation.
Wow. Fuck. You're all
still scared of me.
[BEN] Which is the last thing
I wanna make any of you feel.
You should just... you
should take me back.
Mom, take me back.
[SECURITY SYSTEM]
Front door.
[DOOR SLAMS]
- [IVY] Mom?
- [NEAL] You should have known better.
Don't blame him.
It's my fault.
When he called and asked
what I wanted for Christmas,
I shouldn't have
said him home.
[NEAL]
That's what you said?
I wanted him to know
I missed him.
I didn't... I never
dreamed he would just...
show up.
Is he in the car?
Yup.
It's not like he
came home to stay.
Obviously, that can't
happen right now.
It wouldn't be
good for him.
He needs to go back.
I agree.
And if it weren't Christmas...
It's the right
thing, honey.
It is, Mom.
We hope. We don't know.
I mean, honestly...
I'm so goddamn angry at
the two of you right now.
[HOLLY] I am.
What did I do?
[HOLLY]
You gave up on him.
You both have.
[NEAL]
This is not giving up.
- [HOLLY] It is.
- It's... no, it... it's giving a shit,
which we do, about
what's best for him.
[NEAL]
And for you.
You have a problem
with him, Neal.
No, I'm rooting for him,
but I'm frustrated.
He's lucky,
and we're...
- We're playing loose with it.
- [HOLLY] OK, Neal.
If he were black,
he would be in jail by now.
Maybe this isn't the time.
We said we weren't
going to do this again.
[NEAL]
Remember?
[CLEARING THROAT]
I remember.
[HOLLY SCRIBBLING ON PAPER]
[NEAL] Holly?
Here's the list.
I don't care
who gets what.
Just get it done.
[SLAPS PAPER]
Yeah.
[DROPS KEYS]
God, damn it!
[HOLLY]
God, damn it!
We're all set.
It's okay, Mom.
It's for the best.
Seat belt, please.
Mom.
Mom!
[HOLLY SIGHS]
What?
I'm thinking.
[HOLLY AND NEAL
CHATTING INDISTINCTLY]
All right. Come on.
OK.
Here's the deal, and
it is not negotiable.
You get a day.
Are you sure?
So long as you pass the drug
test I'm about to administer.
Stay clean while you're here,
and that this time tomorrow
you are back in Sober Living.
Yeah, OK.
[HOLLY]
Now, I'm not done.
These are our terms,
and I don't give a shit
if you hate these rules.
You do not leave
my sight ever.
[HOLLY] You do not close
the door to your room,
where, by the way, I will
be sleeping on the floor,
and if you try
to sneak off,
if your bed so much
as make squeak,
I will be all over you
because, for the next 24 hours,
you are mine. All mine. Got it?
I got it.
Good.
Let's get you tested.
Mom.
Relax, I'm not going to be
looking at your privates.
OK, then.
I will be keeping
my eyes on you.
Just like I said.
This is so not cool.
Nothing about this
is cool, Ben.
Come on, pee-pee time.
Shut up.
[SIGHS]
Do you want me to
turn the faucet on?
Stop.
- Shh.
- [BEN] All right, all right, all right.
- Sometimes it helps.
- [BEN] Mm-hmm.
- [LIAM] What are you doing?
- [BEN] OK.
- There's a surprise coming.
- [LACEY] What surprise?
Do you trust me?
- [LACEY] Yes!
- [LIAM] Yes, I do.
Awesome. That's awesome.
[BEN]
Good. Good to hear.
All right.
- You close your eyes.
- [LIAM] Yeah.
- Can you see anything?
- [LACEY] No.
OK, no peaking.
[DOG BARKING]
[LIAM]
I hear something.
- When I was your age, this was my favorite.
- [IVY] It's gross.
Ivy, chill out.
Liam doesn't like crust.
There's a crust-less option
in the works.
Oh, really?
[BEN]
Are you two ready?
[LACEY]
Yes.
[SECURITY SYSTEM BEEPING]
Back door.
- [DOG BARKING]
- OK, open your eyes and feast.
[DOG BARKING]
- [LACEY AND LIAM] Yum!
- [BEN] Right?
[LACEY, GIGGLING]
It's really good.
What have you done?
I know. I know.
There's no going back.
[LIAM]
Mm-hmm. More, please!
[LACEY] But Ashley's
wings have glitter.
Well, we are going to bedazzle
these things like crazy.
Mom, seriously,
they're so good.
I don't want to brag.
Well, yeah, I do.
These are gonna be good.
[LACEY AND IVY LAUGHING]
[DING FROM TIMER]
Ben?
[DOG WHIMPERING]
[BEN]
Boy. Hey, buddy.
[BEN LAUGHING]
Hi Mama.
You knew it.
[HOLLY]
You came back for Ponce.
Busted.
Actually, no.
[DOG WHIMPERING]
OK, let's party.
[PHONE RINGING]
[BEN, OUTSIDE] You know, I really
wouldn't appreciate it if you leave me.
- [NEAL] Holly.
- Hi.
How'd the test go?
- Negative.
- [NEAL] That's great.
Yeah.
[HOLLY] And he's
helping out with chores.
- [NEAL] Really?
- [HOLLY] Mm-hmm.
[NEAL]
OK, well...
I left word with
Sober Living.
OK.
It hurts to think about
the shit I've done.
And what I'm learning in
recovery is I can't undo
what I've done, but I can
do it differently now.
I think we're good here.
One... just one sec, Ivy.
What I mean is, is
I have to be present.
I have to be present.
- It's about this log.
- [IVY] OK.
- It's about this log. It's...
- [IVY] That's enough.
It's about taking care of
this log and placing it here.
[BEN] And I have to take
it one log at a time,
- No, stop.
- [BEN] otherwise it's not gonna...
Ben, stop!
[SIGHS]
- [LOGS FALL]
- [IVY] Aah!
- [IVY] God!
- [BEN] Come on. You got this.
- [IVY LAUGHING]
- [BEN] Come on.
Fine. Just leave it.
We don't need anymore, Ben.
Cleaning up your mess.
- [BEN] We'll do it. We're gonna do it.
- [IVY] Aah!
- [IVY] It's so heavy!
- [BEN] I got it. I got it.
- [BEN] You're good. You're good.
- [IVY] Ponce!
[IVY] Nice. OK.
["FROSTY THE SNOWMAN" PLAYING]
We're in no danger
of it burning out.
What the fuck is this?
Where did our ornaments go?
They don't share
the current aesthetic.
[HOLLY]
Is there a problem?
Ben was just asking where
our old ornaments are.
Did you throw them away?
Come with me.
Be quick and
be careful, yeah?
- [LIAM] Mommy!
- Yes, yes. OK.
[IVY]
Do you see 'em?
[IVY]
It should be right there.
[STIRRING AND MOVEMENT]
Ben?
- [BOXES FALL]
- [BEN] Fuck!
Ben?
Can you come up?
[BEN SIGHS HEAVILY]
- That's it.
- [BEN] I hate it up here.
OK, then let's go already.
[BEN]
Wait...
I need you to check.
[BEN]
I'm, uh...
I used to stash
my... my, um...
OK.
[BREATHING HEAVILY]
[IVY]
Back there?
If there's something there, then
you have to make it go away.
Nothing.
We're good.
I'll help you down.
Come on. Let's go.
- [IVY] Oh, wow. Ben.
- [LIAM CHEERING]
- [LACEY, PLAYING WITH LIAM]
- [BEN] Nice.
[LACEY] Liam, I have
a pine cone nose.
- [SQUEAKING TOYS]
- [IVY] This is better.
- [BEN] Yeah.
- [LACEY] Yeah, cotton balls.
[HOLLY] Ben, Ivy, can you
two come with me, please?
[HOLLY] I know, I went a
little overboard this year.
- [BEN] Mom?
- [HOLLY] Keep wrapping.
[PHONE RINGING]
Hello?
- [NEAL] Hey, honey.
- [HOLLY] Yeah?
They only have regular.
No.
Organic cranberries.
Mom, we don't
have to be 100%...
[HOLLY]
It's important.
- [NEAL] Got it.
- [HOLLY] OK.
Thank you.
[PHONE BEEPS OFF]
Ugh, gotta love that Neal.
Mom?
Running all my last-minute
errands so we can just...
- [HOLLY] stay here till church.
- Mom. Mom, I wanna do some shopping of my own.
Why?
I wanna get them
something from me.
Well, sweetie,
you are the present.
Something that
they can unwrap.
Well, OK. Let's just say these
are from you, then.
But they're not really from me.
I didn't pick them out.
They'll never know.
But I'll know.
All right. Well, honestly,
they have everything they need.
They really don't
need anything more.
So true.
[BEN]
OK, but...
if I didn't pick them out,
then they're not really from me,
which makes me a liar.
And the whole point of this
is to be honest.
It's no good if
I'm not honest.
[BIRDS TWEETING]
[UPBEAT CHRISTMAS TUNES]
[CHILDREN SCREAMING]
This is nice.
Getting to spend a little
quality alone time together.
What do you think
you'll wear tonight?
This is all I brought.
Oh, well, no worries.
We can pick up a sweater
or maybe even
a whole new ensemble.
Ensemble?
That way you'll... I want
you to be comfortable.
Oh, I'm okay with just...
No, come on.
It's Christmas Eve. We're
gonna be in a front pew.
[GUY]
Hey, Burns!
What's going on?
- Hey, man.
- [GUY] Wow, it's been a long time.
I thought you were dead.
What's new?
- I'm... I'm good.
- [GUY] Yeah?
Dude, it's... it's
really good to see you.
- Yeah.
- [GUY] And you look good.
Oh, thank you.
OK.
[HOLLY] He was a little full of
himself, don't you think?
He's all right.
And what's his drug of choice?
You know he has one.
- Speed? Weekend cocaine?
- Mom.
- High caffeinated energy drinks?
- Mom.
All I'm saying is you
forget how special you are.
You just don't... you don't...
Well, people look up to
you, and they love you.
You're a natural leader,
and you are so, so smart.
No, Mom, Ivy is smart.
Well, nobody wants
to be that smart.
It's not like she's having a
tremendous amount of fun, hmm?
What was my point?
You don't have a point.
I do have a point.
My point is, look,
you lick this,
and who knows
how far you can go
and what you can do.
There's so much to
look forward to.
[WOMAN LAUGHING]
[INDISTINCT CHATTERING]
[WOMAN] OK, honey, you've
barely touched your breakfast.
You've got to eat this.
Come on now.
Mrs. Crane.
Dr. Crane.
Oh, hello.
Do I know you?
Holly Burns.
Yes. Oh, yes.
He doesn't always remember.
Holly is the mother of Ivy,
whose singing we love.
She was your patient.
[DR. CRANE]
I remember.
[MRS. CRANE] You must
be so proud of her.
I am proud of all
of my children, yes.
Oh, fuck.
Oh, look, I need
to get a napkin. I...
I'll sit with him.
You're a dear.
Be right back.
So, if you remember Ivy, then
you must remember my son, Ben.
Right over there.
Who?
- I don't remember him.
- Hmm.
[HOLLY] I understand.
You had so many patients.
But when was 14,
he had a small
snowboarding injury.
And you prescribed
painkillers.
And when I asked, you told
me they weren't addictive
and kept upping his dose,
and he got hooked,
and it fucked up his life.
So, you can pretend
you don't remember,
but I won't forget.
I hope you die
a horrible death.
Merry Christmas.
[BEN]
I'm just here for a day.
OK. Yeah.
I will.
OK. Yes. I gotta go.
I gotta go.
Who was that?
Um, my... my sponsor.
I'm feeling...
I'm feeling shaky.
So, I... that's
why I called him.
He told me to
go to a meeting.
They all say that.
Whenever you feel shaky,
get to a meeting.
OK, well, let's just
get your clothes...
I gotta find a meeting. Now.
Did you hear me?
OK.
[HOLLY]
I'm so proud of you.
Knowing what you need.
I just, I think
it's so great.
Like they say, it's
working when you...
What do they say?
It works if you work it.
[WHISPERING]
It works if you work it.
Well, you are working it.
Oh, let's go in.
You're not coming in.
No, why? Of course I am.
No, Mom, I-I'm... I'm good.
It's... it's a... it's a meeting.
I'm gonna come right
out afterwards. No.
I may just tag along.
- [HOLLY] Hi!
- [BEN] Mom.
- [MAN] Hey, yo, what's up, baby?
- [HOLLY] Hello.
- [HOLLY] How are you?
- [BEN] Hey, how you doing?
Stop.
Never hurts to
be friendly.
Dial it down.
OK.
Maybe I'll just... Hi!
- [WOMAN] Hi, guys.
- [HOLLY] Hello.
Everybody seems so nice.
[INDISTINCT CHATTER]
The minute I think I have it,
the minute I think
I've got this, uh...
it's waiting, you know?
It's out there, doing
push-ups right now
while we're sitting in
these folding chairs.
So, I'm really, really grateful
to be here with all of you.
And I-I thank you
for keeping me clean.
Thank you for
letting me share.
So, uh...
- Thank you.
- [APPLAUSE]
Go on to show of hands?
I have a deep
fear of using.
I have a deep fear of going
back into those dark places.
This fellowship,
this group of people,
is what keeps me alive.
You know, I have two
new baby nieces,
and they're going to meet
me for the first time.
I'm just so grateful that
they'll never know me high.
They'll just know
me as... as me.
Hi, I'm Ben, and I,
um, I'm an addict.
[EVERYONE]
Hey, Ben.
[BEN]
I got 77 days.
[APPLAUSE]
And, uh, that's
my most ever.
So, I just want
to get to 78...
right now.
Um, so, I, uh...
I called my sponsor and...
the thing about my sponsor is
that he's a... he's a loud talker.
And, so, uh, I say,
"Hey," and he goes,
[LOUDER]
"What's up?"
And I was like, "Well,
I-I got big news.
I just bought presents that I
actually picked out for someone."
And he was like, "Oh, well,
you're feeling pretty good, huh?"
And I was like, "Yeah, you know,
I actually feel like I'm being honest."
And, well, he said,
"If you were honest, Ben,
you'd look in the mirror and
say, I'm a great big phony."
So, I was like, "OK."
"Because Ben you're
a fucking addict,
and you're the last person who
should believe his own bullshit.
So, now get to a meeting."
[BEN]
So, here I am.
77 days clean.
Some things are better now.
Like I can actually
take a shit.
[GROUP LAUGHS]
Yeah, uh, even
better than that,
I'm waking up more often
than not with an erection.
Sorry, Mom.
And my... yeah, my mom's here.
Um...
I've put her
through a lot, um...
This summer, she found me
upside down on the stairs
with, um, a needle in my arm.
And, uh...
with my dog trying
to keep me awake.
So...
The doctor said that if
it weren't for my dog,
I... I would be dead.
Um, and my mom.
Without her, I wouldn't be
here right now in this room.
Uh, the things that
I've done to myself
and others.
Uh, so, I don't...
Why am I still...
[BEN SNIFFLES]
here?
There's gotta be a reason.
Maybe it's to...
come back and... and make
this Christmas right
or maybe this
is the biggest
fucking mistake of my life.
Um, anyways,
here I am.
Still here.
So, thank you.
Thank you for...
[IN UNISON]
...grant us the serenity
to accept the things
we cannot change,
the courage to change
the things we can,
and the wisdom to
know the difference.
Keep coming back.
It works if you work it.
[INDISTINCT CHATTER]
[HOLLY]
Ben?
- Ben. Good job, sweetie.
- Thanks.
And you coming back
was not a mistake.
Someone wiser than me, your
sponsor, said you can do this.
OK.
Yeah. That's right.
I think some people
want to talk to you.
I'll just wait over here.
[BEN]
OK.
Hey, man.
Thanks for your share.
It's been a long time, yo.
- [BEN] Yeah.
- [MAN] That really hit home.
- [MAN] Thanks, man.
- [BEN] Thank you.
[WOMAN]
Hey.
I-I loved what you said.
You were... you
were very funny.
There's not enough
funny around here.
Thanks.
- You're the mom?
- Yes.
I am.
It's great you
came with him.
Aw, I hope so.
No, my mom died before
I ever got clean.
I would have given anything for
her to see me get my shit together.
I'm sure.
It was honest.
And it was you saying it.
Someone young and hot. Oh, shit.
- Oh, uh, it's... that's okay.
- Oh, I'm blushing... I'm blushing now.
That makes me nervous.
- Is it your first meeting?
- Uh, yeah.
- I'm, you know, new to it all, so...
- [BEN] Yeah?
Well, you should
get a sponsor.
Um, it should
be a woman.
It should be someone
really tough, who will
you know, call you
on your bullshit, and
it's all about, you know,
rigorous honesty.
Oh, they're just
talking program.
It's how we help
each other.
OK.
So, nothing to
worry about then.
Oh, I didn't say that.
You don't remember, do you?
You were my dealer.
Oh, fuck.
Oh, my. I'm sorry.
No, it's fine.
I'm, uh...
I'm going to rehab the
day after Christmas, so,
that's why I, um, I,
you know, I related to
so much to what
you were saying.
It was very inspiring, so...
I just want... I just want to
get high just one last time.
That's normal.
I'm not going to, though.
Good. Don't.
Unless I could
do it with you.
- [WOMAN] Hey.
- Hi.
- [WOMAN] Have a good one.
- Merry Christmas.
I think this one will work.
Or this.
And they have it
in light blue.
And everybody looks
good in light blue.
- Ben?
- What?
Which?
Yes.
Good.
OK, light blue.
Looks like she's gonna have
you try on the whole store.
[HANGERS RATTLING]
[HOLLY]
Thank you so much.
[WOMAN] You're welcome.
These will both complement
your complexion as a gift
from your mother.
You're welcome.
- Coat, please.
- OK.
Nice. I'm good.
Come on.
Pockets.
This is humiliating.
Shh.
No, this is love.
All right.
Free to go.
You didn't check my shoes.
That's not funny.
It was a joke, Mom.
[HOLLY KNOCKING]
Ben.
- Mom, it was a joke.
- It's not funny.
Excuse me?
[HOLLY] Can I get a key
to this door, please?
Unlock the door, Ben.
Right now.
Ben.
[HOLLY KNOCKING]
[HOLLY]
Open the door.
[HOLLY]
This is not funny.
Open this fucking door
right now.
Ben. God, damn it.
Open this fucking door.
What is going on?
What's going on?
Fuck. You stupid fuck.
Hey.
Where did you get this?
- I've been with you the whole time.
- [WOMAN] Excuse me.
The... the... the girl
at the meeting.
The one that
you're helping.
She was gonna use, now,
so I took it from her.
Excuse me.
I'm gonna have to
ask you two to leave.
She was gonna use.
Now she can't.
Mom, the last time I didn't
help someone they died.
Ma'am?
You think I'm an idiot.
- Can you please just exit the store?
- [HOLLY] Yes!
[BEN]
Fuck. Maybe she's a dealer.
- What?
- Maybe she played me.
- You can't trust addicts, Mom. All we do is fucking lie.
- What do I do with that?
I don't... I don't know.
I don't know.
Mind your own
fucking business.
Mom. What...?
Get out of the car.
[BEN]
What is this?
What're we doing here?
Get out of the car.
Now.
- Why are you...
- Because I'll be too angry to do it at the time.
Huh? So, where?
Where do you wanna be?
Oh.
Don't say next to grandpa.
That's prime placement.
And you don't get
that when you OD.
- I'm not gonna OD.
- [HOLLY] So, where?
The new section is nice,
or do you want to
be near a tree?
I don't know.
Well, you better
figure it out.
OK, why... why don't you
cremate me and sprinkle me over
Mrs. Blink, my second grade
teacher? She was pretty hot.
- No, you don't get to be a smart ass about this, young man.
- [BEN] Ow!
I wasn't gonna use.
I was... I-I'm
not gonna use.
- You just...
- I'm just... Mom.
You just told me.
I should never believe you.
Don't say another
fucking word.
Just tell me, son,
where you want
me to bury you.
I'll wait all day.
[BEN]
I'm not going to die.
That's right.
You will, and soon.
[SOFT PIANO
INSTRUMENTAL PLAYING]
Mommy's here!
[NEAL] They didn't like my
spaghetti special, for some reason.
Go figure.
Ben, they only wanted
your sandwich.
What did you put in it?
Drugs.
It's not funny.
- [IVY] It was a joke.
- [HOLLY] Still not funny.
The kids are watching TV?
Yeah, they're
watching TV.
You OK?
[HOLLY]
You come with me.
[CHILDREN'S TV SHOW PLAYING]
[HOLLY]
Hi, sweethearts.
[LIAM AND LACEY]
Hi, Mommy!
- Ben is gonna watch some TV with you.
- [LACEY] Yay!
- Mom, can I talk to you for a second?
- Sit down.
[KID'S SHOW ON TV] ...out of a canon
and now we can't find her anywhere.
[LACEY]
Come on.
Right in the middle.
Stay.
[TV SHOW] Everyone grab on to me,
and I'll swing on this tree branch
into the pond!
You fucking monster.
[NEAL]
Honey, you OK in there?
Yes, just getting changed.
How'd it go? How's
he... how's he doing?
Great. He's doing great.
How are you doing?
I am doing great.
[NEAL]
OK.
Honey, I... I better get ready.
Of course.
You get ready.
I will take care of the chores.
Thank you.
[IVY PRACTICING MUSIC SCALES]
[HOLLY]
Would you just?
No. No, not those slacks.
[HOLLY] The ones from
when you were skinny.
Skinnier.
Ivy?
What?
[HOLLY] I need your big safety pins.
There's some in the kitchen.
- It sounded great, by the way.
- [IVY] Mm-hmm.
Thank you.
[LACEY]
I'm feeding Ponce.
Oh, I'm so glad.
Thanks, honey.
- [LIAM] Mom!
- Yes, sweetie.
It itches.
- [HOLLY ] Where?
- [LIAM] Everywhere!
I wish I'd known that earlier. Mommy
can't do anything about it now.
- [PONCE BARKING]
- But it's everywhere.
Well, it's just part
of being a sheep.
Hey, buddy. The thing about
an itch is just don't scratch.
- Um...
- Shh. Ivy!
Thank you.
I beg your pardon.
[PONCE BARKING]
I'm gonna need a sweater.
[NEAL]
OK. Coming right up.
All right, everybody.
Let's get going.
We don't want to be late.
I'm so sorry.
Don't.
[HOLLY'S HEEL CLICK AWAY]
[PONCE BARKING
AND WHIMPERING]
[INDISTINCT CHATTER]
Stay put.
I'm so sorry, Beth.
This has gotta hurt.
Maggie was an angel.
We think about her.
Hold on tight.
I am.
[CHURCH ORGAN PLAYING]
What'd she say?
No one blames you.
[WOMAN] There were
shepherds out in the field
keeping watch over
their flock by night.
And an angel of the Lord
appeared to them...
[LIAM]
Ben. Hi, Ben!
[WOMAN] shone around them, and
they were filled with fear,
and the angel said to
them, "Be not afraid.
I bring you good
news of a great joy,
which will come to
all the people.
For to you is born
this day in the city
of David, a savior,
who is Christ the Lord.
You will find a babe
wrapped in swaddling clothes
and lying in a manger.
[MUSIC STARTS]
[IVY]
O, Holy night
The stars are
brightly shining
It is the night
Of our dear savoir's birth
Long lay the world
In sin and error pining
Till He appear'd and
the soul felt its worth
[CHORUS JOIN IVY]
A thrill of hope
The weary world rejoices
For yonder breaks
A new and glorious morn
Fall on your knees
And hear the angel voices
O, night divine
O, night when
Christ was born
O, night divine
O, night
O, night divine
[IVY] Hey!
[HOLLY] Ivy, by the way, that
was your best singing ever.
[NEAL] I think the
two of you were great.
[BEN] Yeah, they're completely right.
You were amazing.
- [LACEY] Yeah, you were awesome!
- [BEN] Really amazing.
- [LIAM] Yes!
- [BEN] And you, little buddy.
- [IVY] You think so?
- [LIAM] Yes.
[BEN] For a second there,
I literally thought
that you were a sheep.
[LAUGHTER]
[BEN] And, and, and you didn't
even have to pretend
because you're an angel.
[LIAM AND LACY GIGGLE]
[SECURITY SYSTEM]
Front door.
[INDISTINCT CHATTERING]
[HOLLY]
All right, kiddos.
[HOLLY] Jammies and teeth
brushed right now, please.
- [NEAL] Start jammin'.
- [HOLLY] All right. Come on.
[LACEY]
What happened?
[HOLLY]
Oh, my God.
- [HOLLY] OK, kids.
- [NEAL] Stay right here.
- [HOLLY] Shh, sit down. Sit down.
- [LIAM] Why?
- [NEAL] Don't move.
- [HOLLY] Sit down.
[HOLLY] Sit down,
sit down right here.
- [LIAM] Mom.
- [HOLLY] Sit down.
[HOLLY] It's okay.
It's okay, honey.
[NEAL]
There's broken glass.
- [HOLLY] Don't be scared. Daddy's just checking...
- [NEAL] Ben.
- [GLASS SHATTERING]
- [IVY] Be careful.
[BEN STOMPING
UP THE STAIRS]
Come on. Fuck.
Come on.
[IVY] This can't be
happening. Not again.
[NEAL] Stay right here. Don't move.
It's okay. I know. Don't move.
- [LIAM] I'm scared.
- [HOLLY] It's okay. It's okay.
Come on, motherfucker.
What?
I was at church.
Coast is clear.
[BEN]
We still got the TV,
and we got the computers,
and, most importantly,
we got the presents.
Yeah, it was probably
just neighborhood kids.
Just a practical joke.
[HOLLY]
Neal?
No, no real damage.
[HOLLY]
That's a relief.
Where's Ponce?
[BEN]
I don't know.
I'm sure he's
here somewhere.
- [LIAM] Mom? Where's Ponce?
- [IVY] You just checked the whole house.
- [LACEY] Yeah.
- [HOLLY] He's probably just hiding.
You didn't see him?
- [BEN] No.
- [LIAM] I wanna find Ponce.
- [HOLLY] You know what? It's way past our bed time.
- [IVY] Ponce!
- [HOLLY] Shh, upstairs.
- [LIAM] But mo-o-om.
[IVY]
Ponce!
- [LIAM] I wanna find Ponce.
- [HOLLY] No, shh, upstairs.
- [SECURITY SYSTEM BEEPING]
- [BEN] Fuck.
Ponce!
Come on, Poncey!
Come on, Poncey!
I bet he just...
you know, went
out exploring.
No, he didn't.
Sweetie, he is just having
a Christmas adventure.
All right?
[IVY, SHOUTING]
Come on, boy!
[IVY]
Ponce!
[HOLLY]
OK, snuggled in.
[SECURITY SYSTEM]
Front door.
[IVY] I can't find him anywhere.
And he'd never run off.
[IVY]
Someone took him.
[ORNAMENTS FALLING]
[NEAL] Who would steal our dog?
You come back, and
then this happens?
This is on you.
[SECURITY SYSTEM]
Front door.
[HOLLY] Tomorrow,
when you wake up,
it's gonna be Christmas.
With presents and Ponce.
All right. I love you.
Try to sleep, and I'll
be right back, OK?
Love you.
Leave the light on.
[HOLLY]
Of course I will.
[HOLLY]
What are you doing?
You aren't calling
the cops, are you?
[NEAL]
I am.
No, Neal.
No cops. Not yet.
Where is he?
Why wasn't
the alarm on?
Because Ben was with us.
He's the reason we got the
alarm in the first place.
[HOLLY]
Where is he?
He left.
[IVY, WHISPERING]
Go.
Holly.
Holly?
[SECURITY SYSTEM]
Left door.
[HOLLY]
Jesus. Ben!
Ben!
Every fucking thing
I do turns to shit.
- [HOLLY] No, honey...
- [BEN] No, no matter how
hard I try, everything
just turns to shit.
Please, just get in the car.
I didn't do it.
[HOLLY]
Obviously.
But I'm... I'm the reason
that somebody did.
- [DOG BARKING]
- [BEN] I put you in danger.
I put my... I put my
family in danger.
And...
And I should've
known. I'm so stupid.
No, you're not.
Please, get in the car.
[HOLLY] Jesus.
Where are you going?
Ben!
[HOLLY]
Will you stop?
I have to fix it.
I have to fix it.
I gotta find Ponce.
OK, well, just think.
[BEN] I am. God, damn it.
What?
H-How?
You don't understand.
There are so many people
that it could be.
All right, well, we'll just
take it one asshole at a time.
[HOLLY]
Well, get in the car.
Seat belt.
[BEN] No, don't turn here.
Don't turn on Elm.
Not Pleasant.
All right. Just tell
me where to turn.
Tell me where.
- [BEN] Fuck!
- [HOLLY] What?
I've... I've used there.
I robbed someone there. I...
[HOLLY]
This place?
- [BEN] Yeah.
- [HOLLY] What's here?
You cannot ask, Mom.
If we're...
If we're doing this together,
you cannot ask.
OK, I won't ask.
I'll just... OK.
No. No, Mom.
But I'm not letting
you out of my sight.
You won't have to.
Just stay here.
[DOOR BELL RINGS]
[OPERA MUSIC]
Well.
It's about time.
Come in.
[INDISTINCT CONVERSATION]
[BEN] Did you take...
did you take my dog?
No luck.
Who was that?
Mom, we had a deal.
Let's go.
- I recognize him.
- Mom.
I know I know him.
God, he looks so familiar.
Mr. Richman.
Your history teacher?
Yeah.
His mother had cancer.
Hospice.
He had lots of oxy.
Jars full, and endless supply.
We had an arrangement.
Oh, God.
Oh, my God.
[CAR HONKING]
Oh, that piece of shit.
[VOMITS]
Mom, we gotta
keep going.
[SOMBER INSTRUMENTAL
MUSIC PLAYING]
I think it's...
What's here?
Maggie's dad lives
in one of these.
Why would he
take Ponce?
Who hates me more?
It's one of these.
[BEN]
That's him.
No Ponce.
Heartbreaking, that.
Sometimes it catches.
- [HOLLY] Why don't you let me try?
- [BEN] I got it.
Just... you're being too
herky-jerky with it.
I'm not being
herky-jerky.
Sweetie, I'm not
criticizing you.
I'm just saying.
- Mom, I know how to...
- I don't... apparently not this exact seatbelt
- you know how to put on.
- Holy...!
- [BEN] Shit!
- [HOLLY] Oh, my God!
What the fuck are
you doing here?
You fucking junkie
piece of shit!
Get the fuck out!
[HOLLY] Oh, the fuck?!
[HOLLY] We are going to
have to talk about this.
I mean, I get to
ask questions.
- I get...
- [PHONE RINGING]
I'm gonna have to explain
the window to Neal.
He tried to bash in
my head, and he should.
Don't say that.
If you were him,
you'd want me dead
for what I did.
All right, well, then you're
going to have to help me here.
What did you do?
[POLICE SIRENS]
Who are we
looking for?
You'll know when I know.
[HOLLY]
Thank you.
I got Maggie hooked.
I told her how
great it was.
Did you tie her down and
stick a needle in her arm?
- No, but...
- [HOLLY] And, at that time,
didn't you think it was
the best thing ever?
[HOLLY] Then, you
told her the truth.
At that time,
that was your truth.
But it was wrong.
Didn't you just want
her to be happy?
This... this is so twisted.
[HOLLY] Well, what did
you want her to feel?
Do you hear
yourself right now?
What did you want
her to feel?
Safe.
Loved.
Alive. Whole.
Something that nobody...
not even you could ever...
make me feel.
OK.
You know what
you did wrong.
You lived,
and she didn't.
And we'll never know why.
It should've been me.
No.
You ready to order?
Um, yes, I will have
you soup of the day
and a combo, please.
[PHONE RINGING]
Hi, honey, I was
about to call you.
[NEAL] I'm going out of my mind.
Where are you?
Um, I'm... I'm with Ben.
It took me a while to find
find him, but I did, and, uh,
[HOLLY] We're just
getting a bite.
- [LIAM] Daddy.
- [NEAL] We're supposed to be a united front.
[HOLLY] We are.
You just have to trust me.
Well, you're making
that very hard.
You need to come home.
Not without Ponce.
Those kids are waking
up with their dog.
And there's no need
for cops because
we've got this,
Ben and I.
Don't we, Ben?
[NEAL] You've got this.
- You and the drug addict. You got this.
- [LACEY] Daddy?
Please...
Baby.
Here's an ideal, Neal.
Why don't you take
care of our kids?
And I'll deal with mine.
Hm?
[NEAL] I'm going to bed.
Neal.
What?
He's a bit of a dick.
Wow.
Weren't you just
complaining?
[HOLLY] No, I can think
or say about him
whatever I want because
he is my husband,
and I love him,
but you...
God, you clearly
don't get it.
You're here,
and without Neal,
you wouldn't be.
Mm, don't be so sure.
How many rehabs
is it now?
I couldn't've paid for it.
Insurance won't anymore.
The government
doesn't give a fuck.
And, heaven help you
if you're poor,
which, because of Neal,
we aren't anymore.
He took out a second mortgage on
the house to pay for you this time.
The only thing you should
say about Neal is thank you.
[WAITRESS]
No way, man.
[WAITRESS]
Go!
- Relax.
- No, I'm not relaxing. Go.
[WAITRESS]
I said get out.
[HOLLY]
What is it?
Oh, shit.
[UTENSILS FALLING]
- [GLASS SHATTERING]
- [MAN] What's going on?
[GRUNTING, GROANING]
Who'd you tell?
About what?
- That I'm back.
- Everyone knows you're back.
'Cause of you.
Where's my dog?
Who took my dog?
Oh, so you can steal other
people's shit all you want?
But someone steals
yours you get all holy?
OK, was it Tommy?
No.
Was it Bumgarner?
Jail.
Was it Clayton?
Who's that?
My mom.
Oh, oh, hey, Mrs. B.
Long time.
Spencer?
I... I go by Spider now, Mrs. B.
Feels more like me.
You look terrible.
You always say it
like it is, Mrs. B.
Oh, my God.
I'm sorry, Mrs. B.
[BEN PANTING IN PAIN]
[HOLLY]
Oh, God, that little shit.
It's okay.
Let me just help.
- It's not helping.
- [HOLLY] OK.
I know who has Ponce.
- Well, that's great. That's something.
- [BEN] No, no.
It's the person I
hoped it wouldn't be.
It's gonna take more.
That's my daily limit.
I can write a check, but...
these aren't check
people, are they?
No.
Take this.
It's worth a lot.
It's just a thing.
I'm sorry.
I never liked it.
[BEN]
Turn your lights off.
[HOLLY] All right. Let's...
You know what?
Let's just... let's just
turn right around
because Ponce was a rescue,
and we had a good run.
You did not
just say that.
Yes, I did.
Ponce is just a dog.
I love five people,
and Ponce is two of them.
OK, well, he is
a pee in the house,
crap on the carpet dog,
and you are
so much more.
Fuck, what are we doing?
This is madness.
No. No, this is manageable.
It's Clayton.
We go way back.
I'll pay up,
and maybe we'll
have a good laugh.
You don't believe that.
[BEN]
If I don't deal with this,
then it could be worse next
time for you and the family.
OK, you go in,
pay the man,
get Ponce, and get
right back out.
[INDISTINCT RAP MUSIC
BLASTING FROM THE HOUSE]
You're coming out.
Yeah, I'm coming out.
Be careful.
Lock the door.
Lock the door.
[SIGHS]
Just be calm.
I can't be calm.
I'll just go in.
[BEN] Mom.
Mom, what are you doing?
Oh, my God.
Get over here.
What happened?
Where's Ponce?
All right, I got in,
and I got out.
And that's the good news.
What's the bad?
I just need you
to drive, OK?
Let me do the thinking.
OK.
[HOLLY]
Oh, Jesus.
Oh, my God.
Easy. Easy, Mom.
You're trying too hard.
OK, of course I am.
It's what I do.
Stop. Stop, you're
flooding the engine.
You've gotta
give it a rest.
Oh, sorry.
Clayton doesn't deal
out of here anymore.
He's gone up the chain,
and he's not happy with me.
Oh, my God.
But I got a plan,
so I need you to listen to me.
I can't help but think if
I hadn't left your dad...
He left us, so just
please listen to me.
[HOLLY] You took it so
hard you blamed yourself.
OK, just stop.
It was something
that... it changed you.
[BEN] Just move... move over.
A boy needs a dad.
A boy needs a dad.
Mom.
No, it... that's
what you needed.
Not that dad.
Fuck, we need gas.
[HOLLY] You tried so hard
to keep me happy.
And what kid wouldn't crack
under the weight of that.
Mom.
What?
What is it?
You need to go home.
Not without you.
You cannot go
where I'm going.
It's not safe.
Then I'm definitely going.
No. No.
Go home.
I'll be there soon.
No, I don't believe you.
OK, so now you
don't believe me.
No, I don't.
Mom, you don't know
what you're doing.
- I do.
- You don't know what you're doing.
I'm not worth it.
If you really knew me,
you'd be done with me.
No, honey, I wouldn't.
- And I know you...
- No.
- I know you.
- You don't, Mom. You don't know me.
You don't.
My sponsor told me
not to come back.
He said it was
a shit idea.
That I was not ready.
That's not true.
Yes, it is.
It is true.
And I didn't get the
drugs from the girl.
They were in the attic
above Liam and
Lacey's room.
And within an hour
of coming home,
they were in my pocket.
I told you not
to believe me,
and you didn't
fucking listen.
Do you... I mean, I could...
I could... I could go on.
Do you want
me to go on?
There's so much more.
I killed Maggie.
- It's not working.
- I killed Maggie!
It's not working.
Please, go home!
You have to go
home, please.
Please. I'm not
worth it, please.
Please, go home.
I will not leave you.
[UPBEAT CHRISTMAS
SONG PLAYING]
Get whatever you want.
Oh, and I know
you are not open,
so you have
a Merry Christmas!
[STORE CLERK]
You, too.
Can you get me that
blue drink I really like?
Yeah.
Mom, you're the best.
[BEN] So, its just these
two and one more.
Honey, which one is it?
Because there is more
than one choice.
Ben?
[DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING]
[VOICEMAIL] Hey, it's Ben.
You know what to do.
[BEEPS]
No. No, I don't, Ben.
I don't know what to do.
Get fucking back
here right now.
No!
[DOOR BELL RINGING]
[DOOR UNLOCKS]
I'm sorry.
I... I... I didn't know
where else to go.
He took my car.
And he's gone somewhere
and I don't know what to do.
Come... come in.
I can't tell my husband.
He'll call the cops.
Someone took our dog,
and Ben's just out
trying to find our dog.
Come on, Holly.
He's an addict.
And he's out there.
[CLOCK TICKING]
Stay put.
Holly, you'll need
to listen closely.
He has a shelf-life
of 18 to 24 months,
and it's been over
two years, but...
It should be strong enough
if it's the only kit available.
I'm such a smug bitch.
I'd never thought
I'd need this.
First you pull off
the yellow caps.
You screw in the
applicator tip.
You take off this cap,
and insert it here.
Half a dose in
each nostril.
I c... I can't. I don't
know what I'm doing.
I'd... If you couldn't
save Maggie...
We can't save them.
But you'll hate yourself
if you don't try.
[CLOSING AND ZIPPING THE BAG]
Go find him.
[OMINOUS MUSIC PLAYING]
Now's starting to
feel like Christmas.
Here.
This is my mom's.
And it's worth a lot.
I'm good for the rest,
and I'll make it right.
Yeah, well...
It's not just about
the money, Burns.
I mean, I had big plans
for you. You were my guy.
I know.
[DOG BARKING]
Look, just give
me my dog back,
and leave my family
out of this because
they didn't do anything.
I wish it were that easy.
It can be.
[DOG BARKS]
Fuck it. It's Christmas, right?
All right. Come on.
Take this.
All I need is for you to do
me just one more little favor.
What's that?
Merry Christmas.
How can I help you?
So, I have this, and it's expired.
I need it replaced.
[PHONE PINGS]
[PHARMACIST]
Excuse me, ma'am.
Ma'am.
We don't carry this.
What do you mean
you don't carry it?
You need to try
another pharmacy.
No, you're the
only one open.
What do you mean
you don't carry it?
It's our policy not to encourage
irresponsible behavior.
All right, well, then why don't
you discontinue the oxys,
the perk 30s, and the...
the... the benzo cheerios
or whatever you call them.
If you'd like to file a
complaint, there is a...
I'm fucking filing one!
God, fucking damn it.
[TEXT MESSAGE PINGS]
[CELL PHONE RINGS]
[RINGING CONTINUES]
[RINGING CONTINUES]
[GUY]
Yo. Yo, yo, yo.
[TRAIN SOUNDS HORN]
[INDISTINCT VOICES]
Spare some change?
Mrs. B. Mrs. B, I'm... I'm...
I'm... I'm not gonna hurt you.
I'm not gonna hurt you.
I-I-I'm t-too sick.
Spencer.
Get in the car.
[SPENCER GROANS]
Where is he?
I'm sorry, Mrs. B.
I-I-I'm not...
I'm not doing
my best thinking.
I need... I need to get well.
You mean get high.
Fuck, there's
no high anymore.
I just don't want...
I just don't wanna be sick.
Help me. H-Help me.
I just... I just... I just need
a little... a little money.
OK, I will help you,
but you have to help me.
Where can I find him?
He used to run for Clayton.
You don't... you don't
leave Clayton.
That's where Ben went.
Shit.
- I j... I just snitched.
- [HOLLY] No, I-I-I...
I need more. Tell me
everything you know.
I can't.
[HOLLY]
You can.
- Where is he?
- [SPENCER] OK.
Go to the pawn shop
across the bridge.
It's in Yonkers.
Ask around.
And that's all I could... I
could tell you Mrs. B.
Anything else,
and they'll kill me.
[SPENCER SNIFFLING]
OK?
You said you'd
help me get well.
Your mother and
I were friends
when you and
Ben were babies.
I changed your diaper.
This is so fucked.
Yeah, Mrs. B. It is.
Call you mother, and tell
her that you're not dead.
[TENSE EERIE MUSIC PLAYS]
[PHONE RINGS]
Honey, are you OK?
Just... Just tell
me you're OK.
[HOLLY]
You need to be calm.
[NEAL]
I'm calm. Are you OK?
Yup, we are on it.
Just totally safe,
and closing in.
OK. OK.
Is that my mom?
Where are you? Because
I'm coming to get you.
No, Neal.
- Is that my mom?
- OK. Yes, it is.
[HOLLY] Can I please
talk to her?
Yes, you may.
Hold on one second.
Mommy?
[HOLLY]
You need to be in bed.
Ben and I have this
this under control,
and we will see you
in the morning.
Why are you lying?
[HOLLY]
I'm not.
Mom, I'm the one who set up
the phones for everybody.
You're not with Ben.
Ben is in a whole
other town.
[IVY] And I've been calling
you and texting you
and you won't pick up.
And I didn't tell Neal
because he'll call the cops,
but now I'm freaking out
because you lied to me.
We split up to cover
more ground.
I don't believe you.
[NEAL KNOCKING]
Ivy?
What am I... what am
I supposed to do?
All right, sweetheart.
You need to be
calm and hang up.
Deal with Neal.
Call me back as
soon as you can
from your own phone.
All right?
Yeah?
[NEAL KNOCKING]
Ivy?
OK.
[OMINOUS, TENSE
MUSIC INTENSIFIES]
[PHONE RINGING]
[HOLLY] Hi, honey.
[IVY] Hi, Mom.
OK, I want you to help me
find your brother, yeah?
Keep going, and, um, if
you turn left on Millwood.
Keep going straight...
and turn right
on 23rd street.
[IVY] Do you see that?
This is 23rd street,
right? OK.
OK, and, um...
just keep going
straight for a bit.
[HOLLY]
You're doing great, Ivy.
You're getting really close.
OK, turn before
the intersection.
Mom, turn now.
You're really close.
Do you see him?
Mom?
He should be right there.
I'm gonna call his phone.
OK, good idea.
[PHONE RINGS]
[IVY]
OK, it's ringing.
[PHONE RINGING]
Do you hear it?
[PHONE RINGING]
I'll call you right back.
Don't hang up.
No. Mom?
[PHONE RINGING]
[PHONE RINGING]
[HOLLY]
I got him.
OK, God.
So, so, so, we're
good, sweetie.
Can I just talk to
him really quick?
We gotta keep moving.
We're going to be home
so soon with Ponce.
Let me talk to Ben.
No, we gotta keep
moving, honey.
No, Mom.
Sweetie, listen, I just... I
need you to go to sleep.
I can tell there's
something wrong.
Everything's going to
be OK. Just trust me.
[IVY, CYRING] Mom.
OK, sweetie.
OK, I'll see you.
[AMBULANCE SIRENS]
Excuse me.
Excuse me.
I'm looking for my son.
His name is Ben.
I know he was just here.
Over by the river.
That's where
they all end up.
[WATER LAPPING]
[MAN]
Hey! Get up!
[TRAIN PASSES BY]
[COUGHING]
Ben?
Ben.
Mmm, you did good.
Hey, he did good, right?
You made a lot of
people happy today.
For all your hard work.
Just give me my dog, man.
[TRAIN CHUGS ALONG]
[SEAGULLS CAWING]
[WATER LAPPING]
[PHONE RINGS]
Holly.
Holly?
[HOLLY]
I lost him.
What?
I didn't want to
tell you I've been...
lying to you.
I've looked everywhere,
and I-I-I can't find him.
But I tried.
I know you did.
I lost him a long
time ago. I just...
I don't know where to
look, and I'm so tired.
And I don't know
what to do.
Tell me where you are.
I'm coming to get you.
And we'll find
him together.
No, I'm co... I'm
coming home.
I'm just gonna
come home.
- Hey, boy. Hey, boy.
- [COLLAR CLINKS]
[PONCE WHIMPERS]
[HOPEFUL VIOLIN
INSTRUMENTAL PLAYS]
[SLAMS CAR]
[PHARMACIST]
Anything else?
Here, bud.
[POLICE RADIO CHATTER]
Excuse me.
Excuse me. I'm sorry.
I need help, please.
Ma'am, need to
wait your turn.
No, I can't... I can't wait my turn because
my son, who's... he's not a bad kid.
No, no, no, no, I can't. There's
not time for that right now.
He stole my car.
[HOLLY]
Please.
Excuse me, sir.
- [PHONE RINGING]
- Ma'am, hold on a second.
- Can you find...?
- Hello. Hold on one second.
Ma'am, standing there
- won't help you...
- I just need you to
please find my son
and arrest him!
I'm begging you!
[Ponce barking
If you just wanna calm down and
have a seat, I'll start the form.
Thank you.
I'm sorry.
[PHONE RINGING
AND CHATTERING]
[HOLLY'S CELL
PHONE RINGING]
Hello?
[PONCE WHIMPERING]
[PONCE BARKING]
Good boy.
Good boy.
Oh, my God.
Honey?
Wake up, Ben.
Wake up, honey.
Come on.
OK.
All right.
We've got this. OK.
All right.
[PONCE WHIMPERS]
Come on.
Come on. Hang in there.
Come back to me.
Come on.
Fuck.
[PONCE BARKS]
Just stay with me.
OK. OK.
OK. Ready?
OK.
Wake up.
- Wake up.
- [PONCE BARKS]
Please.
Please. Please, come back.
Come back.
Please, come back.
Please.
Oh, my boy.
Please.
Please. I know
you can do this.
[PONCE BARKS]
Ben.
My boy. Please.
[BEN BREATHES]
[HOPEFUL INSTRUMENTAL
MUSIC PLAYS]
[SOLEMN INSTRUMENTAL
MUSIC PLAYING]
[WATER TRICKLING]
[BIRDS CHIRPING]
[CHORAL GROUP SINGING]
Earth stood hard as iron
Water like a stone
Snow had fallen
Snow on snow
Snow on snow
[WHISPERING]
Stand up straight.
Meant to be quiet.
[CHORAL GROUP CONTINUES]
In the bleak midwinter
- Liam! Liam!
- Ba-a-a!
Long, long ago
- Ba-a-a!
- Sh-sh-sh!
- Hi!
- What are you doing?
Ba-a-a!
Ba-a-a!
Heaven cannot hold Him
Nor earth sustain
[TEACHER] OK, everyone
into your position.
I'm missing a sheep
and an angel.
Has anyone...
[TEACHER]
Oh, there you are.
Liam, Lacey.
Do you wanna
come join us?
[LACEY]
Not really.
[TEACHER]
But we need you.
[WHISPERING]
What?
Do you know how we come
to church once a year?
- Do you wanna come every Sunday?
- [BOTH KIDS] No!
Sh-sh-sh! OK.
We have to make
tonight count.
- Go make me proud.
- [LIAM] OK.
[DOG BARKS]
[DOG BARKS]
[KEYS RATTLING]
[DOG BARKING]
[DOG BARKS]
[IVY SINGING]
The holly and the ivy
When they are
both full grown
[LIAM] Quiet!
Of all the trees that
are in the wood
- [HOLLY] Come on, where's your Christmas spirit, Liam?
- Quiet!
[IVY SINGING]
The rising of the sun
[LIAM]
Quiet!
And the running
of the deer
[BIRDS CAWING]
- [KIDS SHOUTING OVER EACH OTHER]
- Hey, you guys. You guys.
Good kids...
get better gifts.
[KIDS LAUGH]
Wait a minute.
You did not just do that.
I did. You noticed
that, didn't you?
- I did it because it works.
- That's not fair.
- It worked on you for years.
- You didn't do it to me.
- Always, always.
- [KIDS CHATTERING]
Look, we're home!
[LIAM AND LACEY CHEERING]
[LACEY]
What?
[IVY] What the...
[BIRDS CHIRPING]
Oh, my God.
[KEYS RATTLING
AND DROPPING]
Mom. Mom.
No. Don't!
Oh, my God.
I can't believe it.
[BEN] Hi, Mom.
Oh, let me see you.
Is it you?
- [BEN LAUGHING]
- [LACEY] Is that Ben?
Come on. Look.
- [LIAM] It's Ben.
- [LACEY] Yeah, it is Ben.
[LACEY] Take hold of my hand.
Come on. Hurry!
Oh, my God.
I was just...
I was truly just wondering.
Just wondering what if.
[LIAM] Ben!
Don't let go.
[KIDS CHEERING]
[PHONE RINGING]
So, my roommate,
Timmy, has two years,
and is, like,
a recovery rockstar.
[BEN] And he offers me
a free ride.
And I was like,
"Yeah, I'm down."
But I'm thinkin', there's no way
my sponsor's gonna go for this.
But he did?
But he did because
that's how good I'm doing.
Wow, honey.
[BEN] So, Timmy's mom and dad and
his little brother pick us up.
I'm squeezed in the middle.
They're very Christian.
They're all super healthy.
They don't even
drink caffeine.
[DOG BARKING]
[HOLLY]
Great.
Mom, Ben is feeding Ponce.
[BEN]
Oh, yeah. Guilty.
[IVY]
Bread is bad for his teeth.
I think a little
bit is OK, honey.
[HOLLY]
OK. Go on.
OK, so we're, like,
10 minutes into the ride,
and suddenly
there's this smell
that just hangs there.
And it's a...
[BEN] And just when
it starts to clear,
another cloud of... of
stink is unleashed.
- Wait, it's human?
- [BEN] Mm-hmm.
- Oh, my God.
- It was the silent but deadly kind.
[HOLLY]
Oh, my God.
That's the worst kind.
This is great.
So great.
You know, Ponce,
all of us in
the kitchen.
You happy.
Zip me, please.
[HOLLY]
Oh, you got one on.
Good job. OK.
Leave these on.
- OK? All right.
- [LIAM] Bye!
- Be smart.
- [LIAM] Bye!
[HOLLY]
All right.
- Then what happened?
- [BEN] OK, so,
we're trapped in the back and
the farts just keep on coming.
[SECURITY SYSTEM]
Front door.
And so, I'm thinking, surely
someone is gonna say sorry.
- Or excuse me...
- Excuse me. Yes.
Or, like, maybe
crack a window.
But, no, they act like
nothing is wrong.
Oh, my God.
So, I just said,
"You know, you can
let me out here."
[IVY]
Mom?
It's not that funny.
But it is.
So, I just hiked the
rest of the way home.
You didn't!
[BANG ON WINDOW
AND HOLLY SCREAMS]
[KIDS CHEERING]
Oh, they did it again. Ugh.
- [HOLLY] Rascals.
- All right. You're gonna regret this.
Oh, go get 'em.
[HOLLY]
The big brother.
[BEN, OUTSIDE]
Aah!
[BEN AND THE KIDS
SHOUTING OUTSIDE]
[BEN GRUNTING]
[BEN GRUNTING]
[KIDS SCREAMING]
[IVY]
Mom? Mom?
Did you see? He's gained
some weight and...
he's got the sparkle
back in his eyes.
He's clearly doing better.
Then why are you
hiding everything?
[HOLLY]
You know why.
[IVY]
Sad. Having to hide.
Well, I would do
the same for you.
But you'll never have to.
Sweetie, I've got a very
good feeling about this.
Well, I don't.
Listen. This time will
be different. You'll see.
It will.
[IVY] Mom?
Why is he here anyway?
Weren't we supposed to
go visit him tomorrow?
[SECURITY ALARM RINGING]
OK, you need to
go watch him.
No.
No, he'll think
I'm spying.
No, then just, uh, film
him on your phone then.
Hmm?
Are you serious?
Yes, Ivy.
Now.
[KIDS PLAYING WITH BEN]
- [BEN] Yeah?
- [LIAM] I want hot chocolate.
[KIDS CHATTERING]
[KIDS SHOUTING]
[BEN ROARING]
[DOG BARKING]
[LACEY]
Go, go, go!
[KIDS LAUGHING]
What are you doing?
[IVY] I'm making a video
of holiday highlights.
[KIDS SCREAMING AND LAUGHING]
- [LIAM] Run!
- [LACEY] No, hurry!
[PILLS RATTLING]
- [DOG BARKING]
- [LIAM] Hurry, hurry!
[LACEY SCREAMING INAUDIBLY]
[DOG BARKING]
[DOG BARKING]
[LACEY]
Come here, boy!
[LACEY]
Come on, Ponce!
[INAUDIBLE SHOUTING]
[LIAM] Let's go!
[KIDS SCREAMING]
[INDISTINCT KID'S CHATTER]
[LACEY]
Don't do that.
[LACEY]
No...
[SQUEAKING TOY]
[SINGING]
When Ben was ten
Lacy was a baby
When Ben was ten
Liam was a maybe
[LIAM]
What about Ivy?
[KIDS' LAUGHTER]
And now we're all here
So let's go crazy
Let's go crazy!
Who's gonna help me today?
[HOLLY]
Neal?
We're going crazy
I got it under control.
[NEAL] Ivy called, texted.
Why didn't you?
Let's go crazy
Let's go crazy!
Hey, Neal.
Hey, Ben.
How about 15 extra minutes of
screen time starting right now?
[LACEY AND LIAM]
Yay!
[LACEY]
We better hurry up!
I'm... I'm confused.
I thought we had
an understanding.
The therapists.
The doctors.
Everyone, even... even
you, agreed that it's in
your best interest
not to be home yet.
I know.
There's too many
triggers for you here.
That was months ago.
And, and, and
your sponsor said...
Please, let... let Ben
tell me, please.
Please, honey.
[BEN]
OK, I know...
I know I really fucked up
last Christmas.
[IVY]
And the one before that.
It's true.
[BEN] Yeah, I know I've made
a lot of mistakes.
But...
Now, since I'm doing so good,
and... and with all the support
I'm getting and...
w-with my sponsor?
I honestly didn't
think I'd ever...
feel this good again.
[BIRDS CHIRPING]
What? You don't believe me?
Sweetie, we do.
Which is why she hid all
the meds and the jewelry.
I was just removing
the temptation.
Wow. Fuck. You're all
still scared of me.
[BEN] Which is the last thing
I wanna make any of you feel.
You should just... you
should take me back.
Mom, take me back.
[SECURITY SYSTEM]
Front door.
[DOOR SLAMS]
- [IVY] Mom?
- [NEAL] You should have known better.
Don't blame him.
It's my fault.
When he called and asked
what I wanted for Christmas,
I shouldn't have
said him home.
[NEAL]
That's what you said?
I wanted him to know
I missed him.
I didn't... I never
dreamed he would just...
show up.
Is he in the car?
Yup.
It's not like he
came home to stay.
Obviously, that can't
happen right now.
It wouldn't be
good for him.
He needs to go back.
I agree.
And if it weren't Christmas...
It's the right
thing, honey.
It is, Mom.
We hope. We don't know.
I mean, honestly...
I'm so goddamn angry at
the two of you right now.
[HOLLY] I am.
What did I do?
[HOLLY]
You gave up on him.
You both have.
[NEAL]
This is not giving up.
- [HOLLY] It is.
- It's... no, it... it's giving a shit,
which we do, about
what's best for him.
[NEAL]
And for you.
You have a problem
with him, Neal.
No, I'm rooting for him,
but I'm frustrated.
He's lucky,
and we're...
- We're playing loose with it.
- [HOLLY] OK, Neal.
If he were black,
he would be in jail by now.
Maybe this isn't the time.
We said we weren't
going to do this again.
[NEAL]
Remember?
[CLEARING THROAT]
I remember.
[HOLLY SCRIBBLING ON PAPER]
[NEAL] Holly?
Here's the list.
I don't care
who gets what.
Just get it done.
[SLAPS PAPER]
Yeah.
[DROPS KEYS]
God, damn it!
[HOLLY]
God, damn it!
We're all set.
It's okay, Mom.
It's for the best.
Seat belt, please.
Mom.
Mom!
[HOLLY SIGHS]
What?
I'm thinking.
[HOLLY AND NEAL
CHATTING INDISTINCTLY]
All right. Come on.
OK.
Here's the deal, and
it is not negotiable.
You get a day.
Are you sure?
So long as you pass the drug
test I'm about to administer.
Stay clean while you're here,
and that this time tomorrow
you are back in Sober Living.
Yeah, OK.
[HOLLY]
Now, I'm not done.
These are our terms,
and I don't give a shit
if you hate these rules.
You do not leave
my sight ever.
[HOLLY] You do not close
the door to your room,
where, by the way, I will
be sleeping on the floor,
and if you try
to sneak off,
if your bed so much
as make squeak,
I will be all over you
because, for the next 24 hours,
you are mine. All mine. Got it?
I got it.
Good.
Let's get you tested.
Mom.
Relax, I'm not going to be
looking at your privates.
OK, then.
I will be keeping
my eyes on you.
Just like I said.
This is so not cool.
Nothing about this
is cool, Ben.
Come on, pee-pee time.
Shut up.
[SIGHS]
Do you want me to
turn the faucet on?
Stop.
- Shh.
- [BEN] All right, all right, all right.
- Sometimes it helps.
- [BEN] Mm-hmm.
- [LIAM] What are you doing?
- [BEN] OK.
- There's a surprise coming.
- [LACEY] What surprise?
Do you trust me?
- [LACEY] Yes!
- [LIAM] Yes, I do.
Awesome. That's awesome.
[BEN]
Good. Good to hear.
All right.
- You close your eyes.
- [LIAM] Yeah.
- Can you see anything?
- [LACEY] No.
OK, no peaking.
[DOG BARKING]
[LIAM]
I hear something.
- When I was your age, this was my favorite.
- [IVY] It's gross.
Ivy, chill out.
Liam doesn't like crust.
There's a crust-less option
in the works.
Oh, really?
[BEN]
Are you two ready?
[LACEY]
Yes.
[SECURITY SYSTEM BEEPING]
Back door.
- [DOG BARKING]
- OK, open your eyes and feast.
[DOG BARKING]
- [LACEY AND LIAM] Yum!
- [BEN] Right?
[LACEY, GIGGLING]
It's really good.
What have you done?
I know. I know.
There's no going back.
[LIAM]
Mm-hmm. More, please!
[LACEY] But Ashley's
wings have glitter.
Well, we are going to bedazzle
these things like crazy.
Mom, seriously,
they're so good.
I don't want to brag.
Well, yeah, I do.
These are gonna be good.
[LACEY AND IVY LAUGHING]
[DING FROM TIMER]
Ben?
[DOG WHIMPERING]
[BEN]
Boy. Hey, buddy.
[BEN LAUGHING]
Hi Mama.
You knew it.
[HOLLY]
You came back for Ponce.
Busted.
Actually, no.
[DOG WHIMPERING]
OK, let's party.
[PHONE RINGING]
[BEN, OUTSIDE] You know, I really
wouldn't appreciate it if you leave me.
- [NEAL] Holly.
- Hi.
How'd the test go?
- Negative.
- [NEAL] That's great.
Yeah.
[HOLLY] And he's
helping out with chores.
- [NEAL] Really?
- [HOLLY] Mm-hmm.
[NEAL]
OK, well...
I left word with
Sober Living.
OK.
It hurts to think about
the shit I've done.
And what I'm learning in
recovery is I can't undo
what I've done, but I can
do it differently now.
I think we're good here.
One... just one sec, Ivy.
What I mean is, is
I have to be present.
I have to be present.
- It's about this log.
- [IVY] OK.
- It's about this log. It's...
- [IVY] That's enough.
It's about taking care of
this log and placing it here.
[BEN] And I have to take
it one log at a time,
- No, stop.
- [BEN] otherwise it's not gonna...
Ben, stop!
[SIGHS]
- [LOGS FALL]
- [IVY] Aah!
- [IVY] God!
- [BEN] Come on. You got this.
- [IVY LAUGHING]
- [BEN] Come on.
Fine. Just leave it.
We don't need anymore, Ben.
Cleaning up your mess.
- [BEN] We'll do it. We're gonna do it.
- [IVY] Aah!
- [IVY] It's so heavy!
- [BEN] I got it. I got it.
- [BEN] You're good. You're good.
- [IVY] Ponce!
[IVY] Nice. OK.
["FROSTY THE SNOWMAN" PLAYING]
We're in no danger
of it burning out.
What the fuck is this?
Where did our ornaments go?
They don't share
the current aesthetic.
[HOLLY]
Is there a problem?
Ben was just asking where
our old ornaments are.
Did you throw them away?
Come with me.
Be quick and
be careful, yeah?
- [LIAM] Mommy!
- Yes, yes. OK.
[IVY]
Do you see 'em?
[IVY]
It should be right there.
[STIRRING AND MOVEMENT]
Ben?
- [BOXES FALL]
- [BEN] Fuck!
Ben?
Can you come up?
[BEN SIGHS HEAVILY]
- That's it.
- [BEN] I hate it up here.
OK, then let's go already.
[BEN]
Wait...
I need you to check.
[BEN]
I'm, uh...
I used to stash
my... my, um...
OK.
[BREATHING HEAVILY]
[IVY]
Back there?
If there's something there, then
you have to make it go away.
Nothing.
We're good.
I'll help you down.
Come on. Let's go.
- [IVY] Oh, wow. Ben.
- [LIAM CHEERING]
- [LACEY, PLAYING WITH LIAM]
- [BEN] Nice.
[LACEY] Liam, I have
a pine cone nose.
- [SQUEAKING TOYS]
- [IVY] This is better.
- [BEN] Yeah.
- [LACEY] Yeah, cotton balls.
[HOLLY] Ben, Ivy, can you
two come with me, please?
[HOLLY] I know, I went a
little overboard this year.
- [BEN] Mom?
- [HOLLY] Keep wrapping.
[PHONE RINGING]
Hello?
- [NEAL] Hey, honey.
- [HOLLY] Yeah?
They only have regular.
No.
Organic cranberries.
Mom, we don't
have to be 100%...
[HOLLY]
It's important.
- [NEAL] Got it.
- [HOLLY] OK.
Thank you.
[PHONE BEEPS OFF]
Ugh, gotta love that Neal.
Mom?
Running all my last-minute
errands so we can just...
- [HOLLY] stay here till church.
- Mom. Mom, I wanna do some shopping of my own.
Why?
I wanna get them
something from me.
Well, sweetie,
you are the present.
Something that
they can unwrap.
Well, OK. Let's just say these
are from you, then.
But they're not really from me.
I didn't pick them out.
They'll never know.
But I'll know.
All right. Well, honestly,
they have everything they need.
They really don't
need anything more.
So true.
[BEN]
OK, but...
if I didn't pick them out,
then they're not really from me,
which makes me a liar.
And the whole point of this
is to be honest.
It's no good if
I'm not honest.
[BIRDS TWEETING]
[UPBEAT CHRISTMAS TUNES]
[CHILDREN SCREAMING]
This is nice.
Getting to spend a little
quality alone time together.
What do you think
you'll wear tonight?
This is all I brought.
Oh, well, no worries.
We can pick up a sweater
or maybe even
a whole new ensemble.
Ensemble?
That way you'll... I want
you to be comfortable.
Oh, I'm okay with just...
No, come on.
It's Christmas Eve. We're
gonna be in a front pew.
[GUY]
Hey, Burns!
What's going on?
- Hey, man.
- [GUY] Wow, it's been a long time.
I thought you were dead.
What's new?
- I'm... I'm good.
- [GUY] Yeah?
Dude, it's... it's
really good to see you.
- Yeah.
- [GUY] And you look good.
Oh, thank you.
OK.
[HOLLY] He was a little full of
himself, don't you think?
He's all right.
And what's his drug of choice?
You know he has one.
- Speed? Weekend cocaine?
- Mom.
- High caffeinated energy drinks?
- Mom.
All I'm saying is you
forget how special you are.
You just don't... you don't...
Well, people look up to
you, and they love you.
You're a natural leader,
and you are so, so smart.
No, Mom, Ivy is smart.
Well, nobody wants
to be that smart.
It's not like she's having a
tremendous amount of fun, hmm?
What was my point?
You don't have a point.
I do have a point.
My point is, look,
you lick this,
and who knows
how far you can go
and what you can do.
There's so much to
look forward to.
[WOMAN LAUGHING]
[INDISTINCT CHATTERING]
[WOMAN] OK, honey, you've
barely touched your breakfast.
You've got to eat this.
Come on now.
Mrs. Crane.
Dr. Crane.
Oh, hello.
Do I know you?
Holly Burns.
Yes. Oh, yes.
He doesn't always remember.
Holly is the mother of Ivy,
whose singing we love.
She was your patient.
[DR. CRANE]
I remember.
[MRS. CRANE] You must
be so proud of her.
I am proud of all
of my children, yes.
Oh, fuck.
Oh, look, I need
to get a napkin. I...
I'll sit with him.
You're a dear.
Be right back.
So, if you remember Ivy, then
you must remember my son, Ben.
Right over there.
Who?
- I don't remember him.
- Hmm.
[HOLLY] I understand.
You had so many patients.
But when was 14,
he had a small
snowboarding injury.
And you prescribed
painkillers.
And when I asked, you told
me they weren't addictive
and kept upping his dose,
and he got hooked,
and it fucked up his life.
So, you can pretend
you don't remember,
but I won't forget.
I hope you die
a horrible death.
Merry Christmas.
[BEN]
I'm just here for a day.
OK. Yeah.
I will.
OK. Yes. I gotta go.
I gotta go.
Who was that?
Um, my... my sponsor.
I'm feeling...
I'm feeling shaky.
So, I... that's
why I called him.
He told me to
go to a meeting.
They all say that.
Whenever you feel shaky,
get to a meeting.
OK, well, let's just
get your clothes...
I gotta find a meeting. Now.
Did you hear me?
OK.
[HOLLY]
I'm so proud of you.
Knowing what you need.
I just, I think
it's so great.
Like they say, it's
working when you...
What do they say?
It works if you work it.
[WHISPERING]
It works if you work it.
Well, you are working it.
Oh, let's go in.
You're not coming in.
No, why? Of course I am.
No, Mom, I-I'm... I'm good.
It's... it's a... it's a meeting.
I'm gonna come right
out afterwards. No.
I may just tag along.
- [HOLLY] Hi!
- [BEN] Mom.
- [MAN] Hey, yo, what's up, baby?
- [HOLLY] Hello.
- [HOLLY] How are you?
- [BEN] Hey, how you doing?
Stop.
Never hurts to
be friendly.
Dial it down.
OK.
Maybe I'll just... Hi!
- [WOMAN] Hi, guys.
- [HOLLY] Hello.
Everybody seems so nice.
[INDISTINCT CHATTER]
The minute I think I have it,
the minute I think
I've got this, uh...
it's waiting, you know?
It's out there, doing
push-ups right now
while we're sitting in
these folding chairs.
So, I'm really, really grateful
to be here with all of you.
And I-I thank you
for keeping me clean.
Thank you for
letting me share.
So, uh...
- Thank you.
- [APPLAUSE]
Go on to show of hands?
I have a deep
fear of using.
I have a deep fear of going
back into those dark places.
This fellowship,
this group of people,
is what keeps me alive.
You know, I have two
new baby nieces,
and they're going to meet
me for the first time.
I'm just so grateful that
they'll never know me high.
They'll just know
me as... as me.
Hi, I'm Ben, and I,
um, I'm an addict.
[EVERYONE]
Hey, Ben.
[BEN]
I got 77 days.
[APPLAUSE]
And, uh, that's
my most ever.
So, I just want
to get to 78...
right now.
Um, so, I, uh...
I called my sponsor and...
the thing about my sponsor is
that he's a... he's a loud talker.
And, so, uh, I say,
"Hey," and he goes,
[LOUDER]
"What's up?"
And I was like, "Well,
I-I got big news.
I just bought presents that I
actually picked out for someone."
And he was like, "Oh, well,
you're feeling pretty good, huh?"
And I was like, "Yeah, you know,
I actually feel like I'm being honest."
And, well, he said,
"If you were honest, Ben,
you'd look in the mirror and
say, I'm a great big phony."
So, I was like, "OK."
"Because Ben you're
a fucking addict,
and you're the last person who
should believe his own bullshit.
So, now get to a meeting."
[BEN]
So, here I am.
77 days clean.
Some things are better now.
Like I can actually
take a shit.
[GROUP LAUGHS]
Yeah, uh, even
better than that,
I'm waking up more often
than not with an erection.
Sorry, Mom.
And my... yeah, my mom's here.
Um...
I've put her
through a lot, um...
This summer, she found me
upside down on the stairs
with, um, a needle in my arm.
And, uh...
with my dog trying
to keep me awake.
So...
The doctor said that if
it weren't for my dog,
I... I would be dead.
Um, and my mom.
Without her, I wouldn't be
here right now in this room.
Uh, the things that
I've done to myself
and others.
Uh, so, I don't...
Why am I still...
[BEN SNIFFLES]
here?
There's gotta be a reason.
Maybe it's to...
come back and... and make
this Christmas right
or maybe this
is the biggest
fucking mistake of my life.
Um, anyways,
here I am.
Still here.
So, thank you.
Thank you for...
[IN UNISON]
...grant us the serenity
to accept the things
we cannot change,
the courage to change
the things we can,
and the wisdom to
know the difference.
Keep coming back.
It works if you work it.
[INDISTINCT CHATTER]
[HOLLY]
Ben?
- Ben. Good job, sweetie.
- Thanks.
And you coming back
was not a mistake.
Someone wiser than me, your
sponsor, said you can do this.
OK.
Yeah. That's right.
I think some people
want to talk to you.
I'll just wait over here.
[BEN]
OK.
Hey, man.
Thanks for your share.
It's been a long time, yo.
- [BEN] Yeah.
- [MAN] That really hit home.
- [MAN] Thanks, man.
- [BEN] Thank you.
[WOMAN]
Hey.
I-I loved what you said.
You were... you
were very funny.
There's not enough
funny around here.
Thanks.
- You're the mom?
- Yes.
I am.
It's great you
came with him.
Aw, I hope so.
No, my mom died before
I ever got clean.
I would have given anything for
her to see me get my shit together.
I'm sure.
It was honest.
And it was you saying it.
Someone young and hot. Oh, shit.
- Oh, uh, it's... that's okay.
- Oh, I'm blushing... I'm blushing now.
That makes me nervous.
- Is it your first meeting?
- Uh, yeah.
- I'm, you know, new to it all, so...
- [BEN] Yeah?
Well, you should
get a sponsor.
Um, it should
be a woman.
It should be someone
really tough, who will
you know, call you
on your bullshit, and
it's all about, you know,
rigorous honesty.
Oh, they're just
talking program.
It's how we help
each other.
OK.
So, nothing to
worry about then.
Oh, I didn't say that.
You don't remember, do you?
You were my dealer.
Oh, fuck.
Oh, my. I'm sorry.
No, it's fine.
I'm, uh...
I'm going to rehab the
day after Christmas, so,
that's why I, um, I,
you know, I related to
so much to what
you were saying.
It was very inspiring, so...
I just want... I just want to
get high just one last time.
That's normal.
I'm not going to, though.
Good. Don't.
Unless I could
do it with you.
- [WOMAN] Hey.
- Hi.
- [WOMAN] Have a good one.
- Merry Christmas.
I think this one will work.
Or this.
And they have it
in light blue.
And everybody looks
good in light blue.
- Ben?
- What?
Which?
Yes.
Good.
OK, light blue.
Looks like she's gonna have
you try on the whole store.
[HANGERS RATTLING]
[HOLLY]
Thank you so much.
[WOMAN] You're welcome.
These will both complement
your complexion as a gift
from your mother.
You're welcome.
- Coat, please.
- OK.
Nice. I'm good.
Come on.
Pockets.
This is humiliating.
Shh.
No, this is love.
All right.
Free to go.
You didn't check my shoes.
That's not funny.
It was a joke, Mom.
[HOLLY KNOCKING]
Ben.
- Mom, it was a joke.
- It's not funny.
Excuse me?
[HOLLY] Can I get a key
to this door, please?
Unlock the door, Ben.
Right now.
Ben.
[HOLLY KNOCKING]
[HOLLY]
Open the door.
[HOLLY]
This is not funny.
Open this fucking door
right now.
Ben. God, damn it.
Open this fucking door.
What is going on?
What's going on?
Fuck. You stupid fuck.
Hey.
Where did you get this?
- I've been with you the whole time.
- [WOMAN] Excuse me.
The... the... the girl
at the meeting.
The one that
you're helping.
She was gonna use, now,
so I took it from her.
Excuse me.
I'm gonna have to
ask you two to leave.
She was gonna use.
Now she can't.
Mom, the last time I didn't
help someone they died.
Ma'am?
You think I'm an idiot.
- Can you please just exit the store?
- [HOLLY] Yes!
[BEN]
Fuck. Maybe she's a dealer.
- What?
- Maybe she played me.
- You can't trust addicts, Mom. All we do is fucking lie.
- What do I do with that?
I don't... I don't know.
I don't know.
Mind your own
fucking business.
Mom. What...?
Get out of the car.
[BEN]
What is this?
What're we doing here?
Get out of the car.
Now.
- Why are you...
- Because I'll be too angry to do it at the time.
Huh? So, where?
Where do you wanna be?
Oh.
Don't say next to grandpa.
That's prime placement.
And you don't get
that when you OD.
- I'm not gonna OD.
- [HOLLY] So, where?
The new section is nice,
or do you want to
be near a tree?
I don't know.
Well, you better
figure it out.
OK, why... why don't you
cremate me and sprinkle me over
Mrs. Blink, my second grade
teacher? She was pretty hot.
- No, you don't get to be a smart ass about this, young man.
- [BEN] Ow!
I wasn't gonna use.
I was... I-I'm
not gonna use.
- You just...
- I'm just... Mom.
You just told me.
I should never believe you.
Don't say another
fucking word.
Just tell me, son,
where you want
me to bury you.
I'll wait all day.
[BEN]
I'm not going to die.
That's right.
You will, and soon.
[SOFT PIANO
INSTRUMENTAL PLAYING]
Mommy's here!
[NEAL] They didn't like my
spaghetti special, for some reason.
Go figure.
Ben, they only wanted
your sandwich.
What did you put in it?
Drugs.
It's not funny.
- [IVY] It was a joke.
- [HOLLY] Still not funny.
The kids are watching TV?
Yeah, they're
watching TV.
You OK?
[HOLLY]
You come with me.
[CHILDREN'S TV SHOW PLAYING]
[HOLLY]
Hi, sweethearts.
[LIAM AND LACEY]
Hi, Mommy!
- Ben is gonna watch some TV with you.
- [LACEY] Yay!
- Mom, can I talk to you for a second?
- Sit down.
[KID'S SHOW ON TV] ...out of a canon
and now we can't find her anywhere.
[LACEY]
Come on.
Right in the middle.
Stay.
[TV SHOW] Everyone grab on to me,
and I'll swing on this tree branch
into the pond!
You fucking monster.
[NEAL]
Honey, you OK in there?
Yes, just getting changed.
How'd it go? How's
he... how's he doing?
Great. He's doing great.
How are you doing?
I am doing great.
[NEAL]
OK.
Honey, I... I better get ready.
Of course.
You get ready.
I will take care of the chores.
Thank you.
[IVY PRACTICING MUSIC SCALES]
[HOLLY]
Would you just?
No. No, not those slacks.
[HOLLY] The ones from
when you were skinny.
Skinnier.
Ivy?
What?
[HOLLY] I need your big safety pins.
There's some in the kitchen.
- It sounded great, by the way.
- [IVY] Mm-hmm.
Thank you.
[LACEY]
I'm feeding Ponce.
Oh, I'm so glad.
Thanks, honey.
- [LIAM] Mom!
- Yes, sweetie.
It itches.
- [HOLLY ] Where?
- [LIAM] Everywhere!
I wish I'd known that earlier. Mommy
can't do anything about it now.
- [PONCE BARKING]
- But it's everywhere.
Well, it's just part
of being a sheep.
Hey, buddy. The thing about
an itch is just don't scratch.
- Um...
- Shh. Ivy!
Thank you.
I beg your pardon.
[PONCE BARKING]
I'm gonna need a sweater.
[NEAL]
OK. Coming right up.
All right, everybody.
Let's get going.
We don't want to be late.
I'm so sorry.
Don't.
[HOLLY'S HEEL CLICK AWAY]
[PONCE BARKING
AND WHIMPERING]
[INDISTINCT CHATTER]
Stay put.
I'm so sorry, Beth.
This has gotta hurt.
Maggie was an angel.
We think about her.
Hold on tight.
I am.
[CHURCH ORGAN PLAYING]
What'd she say?
No one blames you.
[WOMAN] There were
shepherds out in the field
keeping watch over
their flock by night.
And an angel of the Lord
appeared to them...
[LIAM]
Ben. Hi, Ben!
[WOMAN] shone around them, and
they were filled with fear,
and the angel said to
them, "Be not afraid.
I bring you good
news of a great joy,
which will come to
all the people.
For to you is born
this day in the city
of David, a savior,
who is Christ the Lord.
You will find a babe
wrapped in swaddling clothes
and lying in a manger.
[MUSIC STARTS]
[IVY]
O, Holy night
The stars are
brightly shining
It is the night
Of our dear savoir's birth
Long lay the world
In sin and error pining
Till He appear'd and
the soul felt its worth
[CHORUS JOIN IVY]
A thrill of hope
The weary world rejoices
For yonder breaks
A new and glorious morn
Fall on your knees
And hear the angel voices
O, night divine
O, night when
Christ was born
O, night divine
O, night
O, night divine
[IVY] Hey!
[HOLLY] Ivy, by the way, that
was your best singing ever.
[NEAL] I think the
two of you were great.
[BEN] Yeah, they're completely right.
You were amazing.
- [LACEY] Yeah, you were awesome!
- [BEN] Really amazing.
- [LIAM] Yes!
- [BEN] And you, little buddy.
- [IVY] You think so?
- [LIAM] Yes.
[BEN] For a second there,
I literally thought
that you were a sheep.
[LAUGHTER]
[BEN] And, and, and you didn't
even have to pretend
because you're an angel.
[LIAM AND LACY GIGGLE]
[SECURITY SYSTEM]
Front door.
[INDISTINCT CHATTERING]
[HOLLY]
All right, kiddos.
[HOLLY] Jammies and teeth
brushed right now, please.
- [NEAL] Start jammin'.
- [HOLLY] All right. Come on.
[LACEY]
What happened?
[HOLLY]
Oh, my God.
- [HOLLY] OK, kids.
- [NEAL] Stay right here.
- [HOLLY] Shh, sit down. Sit down.
- [LIAM] Why?
- [NEAL] Don't move.
- [HOLLY] Sit down.
[HOLLY] Sit down,
sit down right here.
- [LIAM] Mom.
- [HOLLY] Sit down.
[HOLLY] It's okay.
It's okay, honey.
[NEAL]
There's broken glass.
- [HOLLY] Don't be scared. Daddy's just checking...
- [NEAL] Ben.
- [GLASS SHATTERING]
- [IVY] Be careful.
[BEN STOMPING
UP THE STAIRS]
Come on. Fuck.
Come on.
[IVY] This can't be
happening. Not again.
[NEAL] Stay right here. Don't move.
It's okay. I know. Don't move.
- [LIAM] I'm scared.
- [HOLLY] It's okay. It's okay.
Come on, motherfucker.
What?
I was at church.
Coast is clear.
[BEN]
We still got the TV,
and we got the computers,
and, most importantly,
we got the presents.
Yeah, it was probably
just neighborhood kids.
Just a practical joke.
[HOLLY]
Neal?
No, no real damage.
[HOLLY]
That's a relief.
Where's Ponce?
[BEN]
I don't know.
I'm sure he's
here somewhere.
- [LIAM] Mom? Where's Ponce?
- [IVY] You just checked the whole house.
- [LACEY] Yeah.
- [HOLLY] He's probably just hiding.
You didn't see him?
- [BEN] No.
- [LIAM] I wanna find Ponce.
- [HOLLY] You know what? It's way past our bed time.
- [IVY] Ponce!
- [HOLLY] Shh, upstairs.
- [LIAM] But mo-o-om.
[IVY]
Ponce!
- [LIAM] I wanna find Ponce.
- [HOLLY] No, shh, upstairs.
- [SECURITY SYSTEM BEEPING]
- [BEN] Fuck.
Ponce!
Come on, Poncey!
Come on, Poncey!
I bet he just...
you know, went
out exploring.
No, he didn't.
Sweetie, he is just having
a Christmas adventure.
All right?
[IVY, SHOUTING]
Come on, boy!
[IVY]
Ponce!
[HOLLY]
OK, snuggled in.
[SECURITY SYSTEM]
Front door.
[IVY] I can't find him anywhere.
And he'd never run off.
[IVY]
Someone took him.
[ORNAMENTS FALLING]
[NEAL] Who would steal our dog?
You come back, and
then this happens?
This is on you.
[SECURITY SYSTEM]
Front door.
[HOLLY] Tomorrow,
when you wake up,
it's gonna be Christmas.
With presents and Ponce.
All right. I love you.
Try to sleep, and I'll
be right back, OK?
Love you.
Leave the light on.
[HOLLY]
Of course I will.
[HOLLY]
What are you doing?
You aren't calling
the cops, are you?
[NEAL]
I am.
No, Neal.
No cops. Not yet.
Where is he?
Why wasn't
the alarm on?
Because Ben was with us.
He's the reason we got the
alarm in the first place.
[HOLLY]
Where is he?
He left.
[IVY, WHISPERING]
Go.
Holly.
Holly?
[SECURITY SYSTEM]
Left door.
[HOLLY]
Jesus. Ben!
Ben!
Every fucking thing
I do turns to shit.
- [HOLLY] No, honey...
- [BEN] No, no matter how
hard I try, everything
just turns to shit.
Please, just get in the car.
I didn't do it.
[HOLLY]
Obviously.
But I'm... I'm the reason
that somebody did.
- [DOG BARKING]
- [BEN] I put you in danger.
I put my... I put my
family in danger.
And...
And I should've
known. I'm so stupid.
No, you're not.
Please, get in the car.
[HOLLY] Jesus.
Where are you going?
Ben!
[HOLLY]
Will you stop?
I have to fix it.
I have to fix it.
I gotta find Ponce.
OK, well, just think.
[BEN] I am. God, damn it.
What?
H-How?
You don't understand.
There are so many people
that it could be.
All right, well, we'll just
take it one asshole at a time.
[HOLLY]
Well, get in the car.
Seat belt.
[BEN] No, don't turn here.
Don't turn on Elm.
Not Pleasant.
All right. Just tell
me where to turn.
Tell me where.
- [BEN] Fuck!
- [HOLLY] What?
I've... I've used there.
I robbed someone there. I...
[HOLLY]
This place?
- [BEN] Yeah.
- [HOLLY] What's here?
You cannot ask, Mom.
If we're...
If we're doing this together,
you cannot ask.
OK, I won't ask.
I'll just... OK.
No. No, Mom.
But I'm not letting
you out of my sight.
You won't have to.
Just stay here.
[DOOR BELL RINGS]
[OPERA MUSIC]
Well.
It's about time.
Come in.
[INDISTINCT CONVERSATION]
[BEN] Did you take...
did you take my dog?
No luck.
Who was that?
Mom, we had a deal.
Let's go.
- I recognize him.
- Mom.
I know I know him.
God, he looks so familiar.
Mr. Richman.
Your history teacher?
Yeah.
His mother had cancer.
Hospice.
He had lots of oxy.
Jars full, and endless supply.
We had an arrangement.
Oh, God.
Oh, my God.
[CAR HONKING]
Oh, that piece of shit.
[VOMITS]
Mom, we gotta
keep going.
[SOMBER INSTRUMENTAL
MUSIC PLAYING]
I think it's...
What's here?
Maggie's dad lives
in one of these.
Why would he
take Ponce?
Who hates me more?
It's one of these.
[BEN]
That's him.
No Ponce.
Heartbreaking, that.
Sometimes it catches.
- [HOLLY] Why don't you let me try?
- [BEN] I got it.
Just... you're being too
herky-jerky with it.
I'm not being
herky-jerky.
Sweetie, I'm not
criticizing you.
I'm just saying.
- Mom, I know how to...
- I don't... apparently not this exact seatbelt
- you know how to put on.
- Holy...!
- [BEN] Shit!
- [HOLLY] Oh, my God!
What the fuck are
you doing here?
You fucking junkie
piece of shit!
Get the fuck out!
[HOLLY] Oh, the fuck?!
[HOLLY] We are going to
have to talk about this.
I mean, I get to
ask questions.
- I get...
- [PHONE RINGING]
I'm gonna have to explain
the window to Neal.
He tried to bash in
my head, and he should.
Don't say that.
If you were him,
you'd want me dead
for what I did.
All right, well, then you're
going to have to help me here.
What did you do?
[POLICE SIRENS]
Who are we
looking for?
You'll know when I know.
[HOLLY]
Thank you.
I got Maggie hooked.
I told her how
great it was.
Did you tie her down and
stick a needle in her arm?
- No, but...
- [HOLLY] And, at that time,
didn't you think it was
the best thing ever?
[HOLLY] Then, you
told her the truth.
At that time,
that was your truth.
But it was wrong.
Didn't you just want
her to be happy?
This... this is so twisted.
[HOLLY] Well, what did
you want her to feel?
Do you hear
yourself right now?
What did you want
her to feel?
Safe.
Loved.
Alive. Whole.
Something that nobody...
not even you could ever...
make me feel.
OK.
You know what
you did wrong.
You lived,
and she didn't.
And we'll never know why.
It should've been me.
No.
You ready to order?
Um, yes, I will have
you soup of the day
and a combo, please.
[PHONE RINGING]
Hi, honey, I was
about to call you.
[NEAL] I'm going out of my mind.
Where are you?
Um, I'm... I'm with Ben.
It took me a while to find
find him, but I did, and, uh,
[HOLLY] We're just
getting a bite.
- [LIAM] Daddy.
- [NEAL] We're supposed to be a united front.
[HOLLY] We are.
You just have to trust me.
Well, you're making
that very hard.
You need to come home.
Not without Ponce.
Those kids are waking
up with their dog.
And there's no need
for cops because
we've got this,
Ben and I.
Don't we, Ben?
[NEAL] You've got this.
- You and the drug addict. You got this.
- [LACEY] Daddy?
Please...
Baby.
Here's an ideal, Neal.
Why don't you take
care of our kids?
And I'll deal with mine.
Hm?
[NEAL] I'm going to bed.
Neal.
What?
He's a bit of a dick.
Wow.
Weren't you just
complaining?
[HOLLY] No, I can think
or say about him
whatever I want because
he is my husband,
and I love him,
but you...
God, you clearly
don't get it.
You're here,
and without Neal,
you wouldn't be.
Mm, don't be so sure.
How many rehabs
is it now?
I couldn't've paid for it.
Insurance won't anymore.
The government
doesn't give a fuck.
And, heaven help you
if you're poor,
which, because of Neal,
we aren't anymore.
He took out a second mortgage on
the house to pay for you this time.
The only thing you should
say about Neal is thank you.
[WAITRESS]
No way, man.
[WAITRESS]
Go!
- Relax.
- No, I'm not relaxing. Go.
[WAITRESS]
I said get out.
[HOLLY]
What is it?
Oh, shit.
[UTENSILS FALLING]
- [GLASS SHATTERING]
- [MAN] What's going on?
[GRUNTING, GROANING]
Who'd you tell?
About what?
- That I'm back.
- Everyone knows you're back.
'Cause of you.
Where's my dog?
Who took my dog?
Oh, so you can steal other
people's shit all you want?
But someone steals
yours you get all holy?
OK, was it Tommy?
No.
Was it Bumgarner?
Jail.
Was it Clayton?
Who's that?
My mom.
Oh, oh, hey, Mrs. B.
Long time.
Spencer?
I... I go by Spider now, Mrs. B.
Feels more like me.
You look terrible.
You always say it
like it is, Mrs. B.
Oh, my God.
I'm sorry, Mrs. B.
[BEN PANTING IN PAIN]
[HOLLY]
Oh, God, that little shit.
It's okay.
Let me just help.
- It's not helping.
- [HOLLY] OK.
I know who has Ponce.
- Well, that's great. That's something.
- [BEN] No, no.
It's the person I
hoped it wouldn't be.
It's gonna take more.
That's my daily limit.
I can write a check, but...
these aren't check
people, are they?
No.
Take this.
It's worth a lot.
It's just a thing.
I'm sorry.
I never liked it.
[BEN]
Turn your lights off.
[HOLLY] All right. Let's...
You know what?
Let's just... let's just
turn right around
because Ponce was a rescue,
and we had a good run.
You did not
just say that.
Yes, I did.
Ponce is just a dog.
I love five people,
and Ponce is two of them.
OK, well, he is
a pee in the house,
crap on the carpet dog,
and you are
so much more.
Fuck, what are we doing?
This is madness.
No. No, this is manageable.
It's Clayton.
We go way back.
I'll pay up,
and maybe we'll
have a good laugh.
You don't believe that.
[BEN]
If I don't deal with this,
then it could be worse next
time for you and the family.
OK, you go in,
pay the man,
get Ponce, and get
right back out.
[INDISTINCT RAP MUSIC
BLASTING FROM THE HOUSE]
You're coming out.
Yeah, I'm coming out.
Be careful.
Lock the door.
Lock the door.
[SIGHS]
Just be calm.
I can't be calm.
I'll just go in.
[BEN] Mom.
Mom, what are you doing?
Oh, my God.
Get over here.
What happened?
Where's Ponce?
All right, I got in,
and I got out.
And that's the good news.
What's the bad?
I just need you
to drive, OK?
Let me do the thinking.
OK.
[HOLLY]
Oh, Jesus.
Oh, my God.
Easy. Easy, Mom.
You're trying too hard.
OK, of course I am.
It's what I do.
Stop. Stop, you're
flooding the engine.
You've gotta
give it a rest.
Oh, sorry.
Clayton doesn't deal
out of here anymore.
He's gone up the chain,
and he's not happy with me.
Oh, my God.
But I got a plan,
so I need you to listen to me.
I can't help but think if
I hadn't left your dad...
He left us, so just
please listen to me.
[HOLLY] You took it so
hard you blamed yourself.
OK, just stop.
It was something
that... it changed you.
[BEN] Just move... move over.
A boy needs a dad.
A boy needs a dad.
Mom.
No, it... that's
what you needed.
Not that dad.
Fuck, we need gas.
[HOLLY] You tried so hard
to keep me happy.
And what kid wouldn't crack
under the weight of that.
Mom.
What?
What is it?
You need to go home.
Not without you.
You cannot go
where I'm going.
It's not safe.
Then I'm definitely going.
No. No.
Go home.
I'll be there soon.
No, I don't believe you.
OK, so now you
don't believe me.
No, I don't.
Mom, you don't know
what you're doing.
- I do.
- You don't know what you're doing.
I'm not worth it.
If you really knew me,
you'd be done with me.
No, honey, I wouldn't.
- And I know you...
- No.
- I know you.
- You don't, Mom. You don't know me.
You don't.
My sponsor told me
not to come back.
He said it was
a shit idea.
That I was not ready.
That's not true.
Yes, it is.
It is true.
And I didn't get the
drugs from the girl.
They were in the attic
above Liam and
Lacey's room.
And within an hour
of coming home,
they were in my pocket.
I told you not
to believe me,
and you didn't
fucking listen.
Do you... I mean, I could...
I could... I could go on.
Do you want
me to go on?
There's so much more.
I killed Maggie.
- It's not working.
- I killed Maggie!
It's not working.
Please, go home!
You have to go
home, please.
Please. I'm not
worth it, please.
Please, go home.
I will not leave you.
[UPBEAT CHRISTMAS
SONG PLAYING]
Get whatever you want.
Oh, and I know
you are not open,
so you have
a Merry Christmas!
[STORE CLERK]
You, too.
Can you get me that
blue drink I really like?
Yeah.
Mom, you're the best.
[BEN] So, its just these
two and one more.
Honey, which one is it?
Because there is more
than one choice.
Ben?
[DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING]
[VOICEMAIL] Hey, it's Ben.
You know what to do.
[BEEPS]
No. No, I don't, Ben.
I don't know what to do.
Get fucking back
here right now.
No!
[DOOR BELL RINGING]
[DOOR UNLOCKS]
I'm sorry.
I... I... I didn't know
where else to go.
He took my car.
And he's gone somewhere
and I don't know what to do.
Come... come in.
I can't tell my husband.
He'll call the cops.
Someone took our dog,
and Ben's just out
trying to find our dog.
Come on, Holly.
He's an addict.
And he's out there.
[CLOCK TICKING]
Stay put.
Holly, you'll need
to listen closely.
He has a shelf-life
of 18 to 24 months,
and it's been over
two years, but...
It should be strong enough
if it's the only kit available.
I'm such a smug bitch.
I'd never thought
I'd need this.
First you pull off
the yellow caps.
You screw in the
applicator tip.
You take off this cap,
and insert it here.
Half a dose in
each nostril.
I c... I can't. I don't
know what I'm doing.
I'd... If you couldn't
save Maggie...
We can't save them.
But you'll hate yourself
if you don't try.
[CLOSING AND ZIPPING THE BAG]
Go find him.
[OMINOUS MUSIC PLAYING]
Now's starting to
feel like Christmas.
Here.
This is my mom's.
And it's worth a lot.
I'm good for the rest,
and I'll make it right.
Yeah, well...
It's not just about
the money, Burns.
I mean, I had big plans
for you. You were my guy.
I know.
[DOG BARKING]
Look, just give
me my dog back,
and leave my family
out of this because
they didn't do anything.
I wish it were that easy.
It can be.
[DOG BARKS]
Fuck it. It's Christmas, right?
All right. Come on.
Take this.
All I need is for you to do
me just one more little favor.
What's that?
Merry Christmas.
How can I help you?
So, I have this, and it's expired.
I need it replaced.
[PHONE PINGS]
[PHARMACIST]
Excuse me, ma'am.
Ma'am.
We don't carry this.
What do you mean
you don't carry it?
You need to try
another pharmacy.
No, you're the
only one open.
What do you mean
you don't carry it?
It's our policy not to encourage
irresponsible behavior.
All right, well, then why don't
you discontinue the oxys,
the perk 30s, and the...
the... the benzo cheerios
or whatever you call them.
If you'd like to file a
complaint, there is a...
I'm fucking filing one!
God, fucking damn it.
[TEXT MESSAGE PINGS]
[CELL PHONE RINGS]
[RINGING CONTINUES]
[RINGING CONTINUES]
[GUY]
Yo. Yo, yo, yo.
[TRAIN SOUNDS HORN]
[INDISTINCT VOICES]
Spare some change?
Mrs. B. Mrs. B, I'm... I'm...
I'm... I'm not gonna hurt you.
I'm not gonna hurt you.
I-I-I'm t-too sick.
Spencer.
Get in the car.
[SPENCER GROANS]
Where is he?
I'm sorry, Mrs. B.
I-I-I'm not...
I'm not doing
my best thinking.
I need... I need to get well.
You mean get high.
Fuck, there's
no high anymore.
I just don't want...
I just don't wanna be sick.
Help me. H-Help me.
I just... I just... I just need
a little... a little money.
OK, I will help you,
but you have to help me.
Where can I find him?
He used to run for Clayton.
You don't... you don't
leave Clayton.
That's where Ben went.
Shit.
- I j... I just snitched.
- [HOLLY] No, I-I-I...
I need more. Tell me
everything you know.
I can't.
[HOLLY]
You can.
- Where is he?
- [SPENCER] OK.
Go to the pawn shop
across the bridge.
It's in Yonkers.
Ask around.
And that's all I could... I
could tell you Mrs. B.
Anything else,
and they'll kill me.
[SPENCER SNIFFLING]
OK?
You said you'd
help me get well.
Your mother and
I were friends
when you and
Ben were babies.
I changed your diaper.
This is so fucked.
Yeah, Mrs. B. It is.
Call you mother, and tell
her that you're not dead.
[TENSE EERIE MUSIC PLAYS]
[PHONE RINGS]
Honey, are you OK?
Just... Just tell
me you're OK.
[HOLLY]
You need to be calm.
[NEAL]
I'm calm. Are you OK?
Yup, we are on it.
Just totally safe,
and closing in.
OK. OK.
Is that my mom?
Where are you? Because
I'm coming to get you.
No, Neal.
- Is that my mom?
- OK. Yes, it is.
[HOLLY] Can I please
talk to her?
Yes, you may.
Hold on one second.
Mommy?
[HOLLY]
You need to be in bed.
Ben and I have this
this under control,
and we will see you
in the morning.
Why are you lying?
[HOLLY]
I'm not.
Mom, I'm the one who set up
the phones for everybody.
You're not with Ben.
Ben is in a whole
other town.
[IVY] And I've been calling
you and texting you
and you won't pick up.
And I didn't tell Neal
because he'll call the cops,
but now I'm freaking out
because you lied to me.
We split up to cover
more ground.
I don't believe you.
[NEAL KNOCKING]
Ivy?
What am I... what am
I supposed to do?
All right, sweetheart.
You need to be
calm and hang up.
Deal with Neal.
Call me back as
soon as you can
from your own phone.
All right?
Yeah?
[NEAL KNOCKING]
Ivy?
OK.
[OMINOUS, TENSE
MUSIC INTENSIFIES]
[PHONE RINGING]
[HOLLY] Hi, honey.
[IVY] Hi, Mom.
OK, I want you to help me
find your brother, yeah?
Keep going, and, um, if
you turn left on Millwood.
Keep going straight...
and turn right
on 23rd street.
[IVY] Do you see that?
This is 23rd street,
right? OK.
OK, and, um...
just keep going
straight for a bit.
[HOLLY]
You're doing great, Ivy.
You're getting really close.
OK, turn before
the intersection.
Mom, turn now.
You're really close.
Do you see him?
Mom?
He should be right there.
I'm gonna call his phone.
OK, good idea.
[PHONE RINGS]
[IVY]
OK, it's ringing.
[PHONE RINGING]
Do you hear it?
[PHONE RINGING]
I'll call you right back.
Don't hang up.
No. Mom?
[PHONE RINGING]
[PHONE RINGING]
[HOLLY]
I got him.
OK, God.
So, so, so, we're
good, sweetie.
Can I just talk to
him really quick?
We gotta keep moving.
We're going to be home
so soon with Ponce.
Let me talk to Ben.
No, we gotta keep
moving, honey.
No, Mom.
Sweetie, listen, I just... I
need you to go to sleep.
I can tell there's
something wrong.
Everything's going to
be OK. Just trust me.
[IVY, CYRING] Mom.
OK, sweetie.
OK, I'll see you.
[AMBULANCE SIRENS]
Excuse me.
Excuse me.
I'm looking for my son.
His name is Ben.
I know he was just here.
Over by the river.
That's where
they all end up.
[WATER LAPPING]
[MAN]
Hey! Get up!
[TRAIN PASSES BY]
[COUGHING]
Ben?
Ben.
Mmm, you did good.
Hey, he did good, right?
You made a lot of
people happy today.
For all your hard work.
Just give me my dog, man.
[TRAIN CHUGS ALONG]
[SEAGULLS CAWING]
[WATER LAPPING]
[PHONE RINGS]
Holly.
Holly?
[HOLLY]
I lost him.
What?
I didn't want to
tell you I've been...
lying to you.
I've looked everywhere,
and I-I-I can't find him.
But I tried.
I know you did.
I lost him a long
time ago. I just...
I don't know where to
look, and I'm so tired.
And I don't know
what to do.
Tell me where you are.
I'm coming to get you.
And we'll find
him together.
No, I'm co... I'm
coming home.
I'm just gonna
come home.
- Hey, boy. Hey, boy.
- [COLLAR CLINKS]
[PONCE WHIMPERS]
[HOPEFUL VIOLIN
INSTRUMENTAL PLAYS]
[SLAMS CAR]
[PHARMACIST]
Anything else?
Here, bud.
[POLICE RADIO CHATTER]
Excuse me.
Excuse me. I'm sorry.
I need help, please.
Ma'am, need to
wait your turn.
No, I can't... I can't wait my turn because
my son, who's... he's not a bad kid.
No, no, no, no, I can't. There's
not time for that right now.
He stole my car.
[HOLLY]
Please.
Excuse me, sir.
- [PHONE RINGING]
- Ma'am, hold on a second.
- Can you find...?
- Hello. Hold on one second.
Ma'am, standing there
- won't help you...
- I just need you to
please find my son
and arrest him!
I'm begging you!
[Ponce barking
If you just wanna calm down and
have a seat, I'll start the form.
Thank you.
I'm sorry.
[PHONE RINGING
AND CHATTERING]
[HOLLY'S CELL
PHONE RINGING]
Hello?
[PONCE WHIMPERING]
[PONCE BARKING]
Good boy.
Good boy.
Oh, my God.
Honey?
Wake up, Ben.
Wake up, honey.
Come on.
OK.
All right.
We've got this. OK.
All right.
[PONCE WHIMPERS]
Come on.
Come on. Hang in there.
Come back to me.
Come on.
Fuck.
[PONCE BARKS]
Just stay with me.
OK. OK.
OK. Ready?
OK.
Wake up.
- Wake up.
- [PONCE BARKS]
Please.
Please. Please, come back.
Come back.
Please, come back.
Please.
Oh, my boy.
Please.
Please. I know
you can do this.
[PONCE BARKS]
Ben.
My boy. Please.
[BEN BREATHES]
[HOPEFUL INSTRUMENTAL
MUSIC PLAYS]