Captain Morten and the Spider Queen (2018) Movie Script
1
[OPENING THEME MUSIC PLAYING]
[WASP BUZZING]
[SEAGULLS SQUAWKING]
MORTEN: Dad,
when are you coming home?
[PIGEON COOING]
Dear Dad,
when you come home,
can you bring me a, um...
Bring me a...
[GRUNTING]
[GULPING]
[COOING]
- [GASPS]
- Dear Dad,
I'm building a little boat
just like yours.
A bit smaller.
It's got a ship's wheel,
some sails, and an anchor.
Come back soon,
little pigeon.
ELIZA: Morten?
Come on, Morten.
It's the dress rehearsal.
We've got to dance
for Mom and Dad, remember?
[GRUNTS]
[GROANING]
I'm not dancing, Elizabeth.
[SCOFFS]
And those two stuffed parrots
are your mom and dad, not mine.
What sort
of spelling is that?
You'd better fix it,
or I might have to sack you.
MAN 1: This isn't our job.
We're not sign writers.
Or people that can spell.
BOTH: We are sailors.
[ANNABELLE SCOFFS]
The only sea you've ever sailed
in is that bottle of lemonade.
MAN 2: We've got
the tattoos to prove it.
- Oh, yeah.
- Hmm.
Sailors indeed. [SPITS]
All that work for a bowl
of soup and a few donuts?
What kind of life is that?
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
[THUD]
Morten!
Oh, Morten!
[GASPING]
Morten!
[GASPING]
Morten!
[LIVELY MUSIC PLAYING]
Mm.
[EERIE MUSIC PLAYING]
- Ow!
- Leave that fish alone.
What do you mean?
I'm sailing my boat.
Don't contradict me.
Ugh! Ow!
But a Captain never
abandons his ship.
Aah!
[DOOR SLAMS]
ANNABELLE: You are no Captain,
and that's no ship.
It is a ship!
And I am a Captain!
[SIGHING]
One-Eye was one of
the most mysterious figures
in the pirate history,
some historians think he died after
being marooned on a desert island
by his mutinous crew.
Some think, along with his
gold, he lost his mind.
[grunting]
There's a storm coming!
Douse the sails!
MORTEN: In a moment of madness,
he thought his castle was his ship.
Steady! Now, my beauty!
Take me to my treasure!
- [BELL CHIMING]
- Huh?
[gasps]
[STRAINING]
[COOING, SLURPING]
ELIZA: Morten!
[SIGHING]
Huh?
Oh.
CAPTAIN VIKS: Whoo-hoo!
Dad!
Morten! [LAUGHING]
Whoa, whoa.
Huh?
[DAD WHISTLING]
Did you have
a good trip, Captain?
Oh, strange things happen
at sea, Morten.
Did I ever tell you
about the dancing whales?
As light on their tailfins
as ballerinas.
ANNABELLE: Where is Morten?
ELIZA: He's in his room.
That is so unprofessional.
What's he doing in his room?
You shoved him
in there, remember?
Don't talk back. Now...
First position.
[MUSIC BEGINS]
Up.
Higher.
[MUSIC LOOPING]
[GASPING]
How can I have an artistic
thought in my head
when there are
all these interruptions?
[DOOR OPENS]
Here I am.
[MUSIC WINDS DOWN]
Oh, Captain Viks.
Welcome back.
Make yourself at home.
Thank you.
[WHISTLING]
Hmm. How did you get out...
Such lovely curls.
So, Captain, I imagine
your trip was full
of the most
unbelievable adventures.
All believable, but fascinating.
When I was sailing
in the south seas,
I was invited to tea
by some friendly locals.
[STRAINING]
Aah!
[YELLING]
We had decks to swab
and ropes to knot.
We didn't have time
to hang around simmering
until I was tender.
So, I had to decline
their kind invitation.
- And as chance would have it...
- [SCREAMING]
we met an old friend
who took me back to the ship.
That pigeon earned
his corn always.
[GOBBLING]
[COOING]
Then it was time for me
to come back home.
Oh. How exciting
that must have been, Captain.
Incredible.
- [SLURPING] -ANNABELLE: Ah,
the best donuts in the world.
Mmm. Divine.
Light as a butterfly,
Elizabeth. Remember.
No donuts for you, dear.
- [KNOCKING ON WINDOW]
- Huh?
Time to weigh anchor.
Already?
Time and tide wait for no man.
[MORTEN GRUNTING]
[DOOR SLAMS]
MORTEN: Go away.
Aye, aye, Captain.
Anchors away.
Uh...
You miss your mother?
We do too, you know?
I wish she'd never gone
to sail with me.
It was so cold
at the South Pole that
we thought we'd never make it
back to the ship.
That's when your mother
decided to become a penguin.
We don't blame her.
Most easily, become one myself.
[CLEARS THROAT]
You know that's not true, Dad.
[KNOCKING AT DOOR]
[PIGEON WHISTLING]
Time to go.
I want to come with you.
One day, I'll take you.
In the meantime,
you might want to store the
anchor for that ship of yours.
You'll be brave now, won't you?
[SIGHING]
ANNABELLE: You needn't worry.
We are very happy to look after Morten.
We love him as if he
were our own child.
Not much to shell
from this trip.
FELIX: Hmm.
ANNABELLE: No.
Hardly dents your account.
He'll never be able to pay us
what he owes us.
Don't worry, my dear.
I have a plan.
I'll find all
the One-eye's pirate gold
if we have to pull every nail
out of its stinking hull.
[CHIRPING]
[WASPS BUZZING]
Morten?
That's beautiful.
Oh.
Huh?
[GASPS]
Be a good lad and tell you
mother Mr. Stinger is here.
She's not my mother.
Just tell her.
And say out of my way
when I visit
my Butterfly Queen.
[MAN VOCALIZING]
Wanna go to the show?
Yeah. Why not?
Come on, Killer.
Fog machine.
Unbelievemente.
Incredibile.
Maestro Cucaracha super check.
Buy a ticket. It's very cheap.
Come on. [TALKING GIBBERISH]
[SILENCE]
Woof.
[CASTING SPELL]
- Change this doggy.
- Huh?
Wait and see.
[DOG BARKING]
- Grazie. Grazie.
- That's some trick.
[SQUASH]
- [DOG WHIMPERING]
- Whoops.
STINGER: We used to queue
for hours to watch you dance.
[GLASSES CLINKING]
Oh, please.
Don't bring up
those unpleasant memories.
[CROWD CHEERING]
Aah!
[CROWD EXCLAIMING]
[SIGHING]
A most unfortunate
accident indeed.
Nowadays,
I choreograph ballets.
I call this piece
"Butterfly in Blue."
You can be first mate.
ANNABELLE:
Morten, pay attention.
Turn Killer back now.
He doesn't like being little.
And possibly, dead.
There's just
a slight technicality.
A dimensional problem.
Just give me a second.
Cucaracha Caputo.
[CUCARACHA HUFFING]
- Look. Over there! Dolphins!
- Huh?
Those are penguins, you liar.
Cheat, get him!
[CUCARACHA SCREAMING]
MAN: Come back!
Hold it right there.
[PIANO MUSIC PLAYING]
ANNABELLE: Stop that at once.
Oh!
So unprofessional.
I said stop it!
Felix, go and check.
Aha!
What have we here?
[SCREAMS]
- [SNORING]
- FELIX: A spider!
[SCREAMING]
Oh!
Bravo!
Did you like it?
Oh, the finale was just...
Astonishing!
ANNABELLE: Oh, imagine what I
could do if I had a real theater
with professional dancers.
But...
That would cost so much.
The Captain owes you money.
Make him pay up.
ANNABELLE: Captain Viks
hasn't got any money.
He'll never pay me
what he owes me
for looking after
that boy of his.
But what about the boat?
Nobody would buy
that stinky old rust bucket.
I wouldn't be so sure.
Someone might
get tricked into it.
Let me sign your guestbook
with my golden pen before I go.
Please do.
There's a place where
you can leave a comment.
About my ballet.
Oh!
MORTEN: Come on.
This is the ship's wheel.
You have to go
and hang on to it.
STINGER: Goodbye, my dear.
A real sailor wouldn't play with
a boat like that in the bath.
[LAUGHING] Salamander.
[BURPING]
Zigfred, Zackfred,
your'e wanted.
Gotcha.
[WHISTLING]
MAN: All right. We're coming.
[BRANCH CRACKING]
Uh, uh. What do you think?
Spanner?
Hacksaw? Hammer?
Eh, chewing gum?
Oh, good man.
Thanks.
Not for you, you fool!
Easy for a pair
of old sailors like us.
[LAUGHING]
Aah!
[GURGLING]
My lovely floor!
Uh. No, no problem.
No problem. We can fix it.
We can fix this.
[LAUGHING]
No problem. It's okay.
Aah!
It's a beautiful ship.
MORTEN: Just magic.
If it was a real ship,
with real sailors...
I would be... Ow!
- [MORTEN SCREAMING] -ANNABELLE:
This is all your fault.
I give you food,
an education, culture...
And you just throw it
back in my face.
You, and that father of yours
will be begging in the streets
by the time
I'm finished with you.
Dad, where are you?
- [CUCARACHA SCREAMING]
- Hmm?
[CUCARACHA SCREAMING]
[GASPS]
[MACHINE RATTLING]
Stupido machine, stop!
[STRAINING]
[CUCARACHA SCREAMING]
[GASPING]
[MORTEN GRUNTS]
[GROANING]
[FLUTTERING]
[GASPING]
[GASPING]
Ya!
[MORTEN GROANING]
Mm.
Whoa.
[SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING]
[FLOORBOARD CREAKING]
[SHIP CREAKING]
[LIVELY MUSIC PLAYING]
MORTEN: I'm a Captain.
And this is my ship.
Aye, aye, Captain Morten.
Prepare to cast off.
Aye, aye, Captain Morten.
Whoa.
Full steam ahead!
[GASPING]
- Perhaps my brother and I...
- Can be of assistance?
Yes. You hold her steady
while I check the rigging.
[LAUGHING MOCKINGLY]
Is that your idea of a joke?
Very funny. Ha ha.
Hey! What do you think
you're doing?
I'm the Captain.
[LAUGHING]
The Captain.
MORTEN: Stop it. Let me go!
Let go of me.
WASP 1: Time for a bit
of swimming practice.
But I can't swim.
Well, that's just
too bad, isn't it?
[LAUGHING] It's never
too late to learn.
Help! Somebody!
- FELIX: Gentlemen?
- [BOTH GASPING]
Can you please
refrain from shouting?
The queen is asleep.
- It was him!
- Whoa, Whoa!
- [STAMMERING] No.
- [MORTEN SCREAMING]
You're the one
that was shouting.
[MUFFLED SCREAMS]
Good gracious. Who is this
unfortunate creature?
I have no idea.
Help!
- Help!
- Hmm.
Lovely day for a swim.
Have we met before?
Help! Somebody!
Don't just stand there,
you fools.
- Rescue him.
- Oh. Right.
MORTEN: Help.
Careful with him.
He looks as if he might break.
- Whoa.
- [MORTEN STRAINING]
[COUGHING]
Parson, these sea-men are
out of control.
Lock them in the hull!
Of course. Aye, aye.
Avec plaisir. Right away.
Throw him in the hull.
He can be next.
[DOOR ROLLING]
[MORTEN SCREAMING]
[DOOR SHUTS]
[GASPING]
Is that sugar?
[STRAINING]
[GRUNTING]
- [SOBBING]
- Huh?
[SOBBING]
Hey, don't touch me!
Who's that?
Eliza.
What are you doing here?
I was just minding
my own business,
enjoying the sunshine.
Then suddenly something
picked me up,
and flung me
into this dark pit.
I tried eating my way out,
but that just made
things worse.
Whoa!
I had to plug the hole,
and I've been sitting here ever since.
Sitting, and sitting. I'll probably
go on sitting here forever and ever.
What kinda person would
do something like that?
I mean, throw me
into this dungeon.
I'm sure whoever did it
didn't mean to hurt you.
Aw!
- Oh, please stop crying.
- [CRYING]
We'll sort it out.
Hey, you up there.
Hurry.
There's a hole in the hull.
Quiet down, you idiot.
MORTEN:
What's the matter with you?
- Can't you hear me?
- What is that awful noise?
It's a surprise for you.
You'll love it.
Always looking out for me,
aren't you, Felix?
I do my best, mon amour.
Ha!
Prepare the prisoner.
I want him all in one piece.
Make way for the queen.
[FANFARE]
All kneel
for Her Majesty, the queen.
Long live her most
beautiful gorgeousness.
Huh?
ALL: Long live the queen.
Thank you,
my dear loyal subjects.
And don't worry. I shall definitely
live longer than any of you.
[ANNABELLE LAUGHING]
A guest.
A very tasty guest,
my lovely Queen.
Why isn't he kneeling?
Well, you always wanted to know
what little boys are made of.
Oh, yes. He's very little.
And so cute.
This is your Captain speaking!
There's a hole in the hull.
I repeat,
there's a hole in the hull.
Who told you that?
I saw it for myself.
I'm sure you didn't.
Yes, I did. With my own eyes.
We need to patch it up.
- Or we'll sink.
- [GRUNTING]
[BOTH EXCLAIMING]
Hmm. I think not.
[gasps]
Oh!
In case you hadn't noticed,
I'm the one in charge here.
If I say, "Bow,"
you bow.
If I say, "Jump,"
- you ask, "How, how?"
- [SCREAMING]
Most important of all,
when I say, "Dance,"
you'll dance. Felix?
Music please.
With pleasure.
[RECORD PLAYING]
Mm?
What do you think, Annabelle?
Time to eat?
Nothing like a work of art
to stimulate the appetite.
This one's very fresh.
On the other hand,
you are a good dancer.
Really?
And do we really need two wasps?
After all, they're identical.
Same tattoos, same stingers,
same personality.
What's the point of having two?
No, no, no.
We're totally different.
Nothing like each other.
Absolutely nothing in common.
Goodbye, bro.
WASP 1: Oh, I'll miss you.
No, I think not as much
as I miss you.
No, really. I'll miss you more.
I'll miss you much more.
[WASPS CONTINUE ARGUING]
Stop that at once.
We'll have no fighting.
We'll just leave it to chance.
Shall we?
Huh.
Huh?
[GROWLING]
[LAUGHING]
Aah! No. No!
Best of three. Best of three.
Please, best of three!
I don't think so.
[WHIMPERING]
Whoa!
Aah!
[WHIMPERING]
[RECORD PLAYING]
[CRYING]
[GASPING]
[CRYING]
Oh. The best donuts
in the world.
And all possible
because of the sacrifice
made by a heroic wasp.
Delicious. Mm.
Absolutely divine.
Mm!
You're so good.
[GULPING]
Oh, God, I miss you. I would've shared.
Oh, you aren't here.
But you know what I mean.
Oh, God. I'm so confused.
[MUNCHING]
Now where's
my little sweety pie.
[GASPING]
Come on! We've got
to clear the decks.
Sorry?
Get below
before it's too late.
Darling, if I didn't
like your style,
you'd be a plate
of donuts by now.
But you must realize
this is my party,
and nobody leaves
until I say so.
[ALL GASPING]
Let's go below.
[DOOR OPENS]
Oh!
WASP 2: Oh!
Fear not, my sweet.
Daddy will look after you.
[ALL WHIMPERING AND SCREAMING]
Felix, show some guts.
If... [RETCHING]
You insist. [RETCHING]
[BOTH MUNCHING]
Bit tastelessness and, uh...
Yeah, not very filling.
All it needs is some sugar...
ALL: Whoa!
Help!
Help.
Help!
[CUCARACHA SCREAMING]
Man overboard.
Cucaracha Caputo.
Help.
MORTEN: Hold on, Mr. Cucaracha.
[CUCARACHA SCREAMING]
Help!
Help.
Don't worry. Daddy's here.
We're going to drown.
Aah!
I can't keep
the water out much longer.
[WASP SCREAMING]
Calm down, everyone.
There is nothing
to be scared of.
How do you know that,
Queen Annabelle?
I mean, how do you know?
I just know, all right?
[STRAINING]
Hey, hey! We did it!
See? I told you there was
nothing to be scared of.
Right as always, my dear.
Come on now. Eat up.
ELIZA: Oh, I'm starving.
- Who said that?
- It's me. Eliza.
Just look at you, girl.
I'm tired, I'm cold.
And I'm starving.
And you're fat.
Fat as a pregnant pig.
Can I just have
one little donut, please?
[CRYING]
You know how much
I love you, don't you?
Yes, I suppose so.
That's why you can't
have any donuts.
It's for your own good.
Just one.
If I get any thinner,
the water will come in.
ANNABELLE:
The answer is still no.
One day,
you'll thank me for it.
Mm.
[ELIZA CRYING]
That was a close call.
Capitano, terrible accidente.
The magical fog machine
e distrutta.
Magic fog machine?
Is that what
made this happen?
My fog machine
can do ab-solutamente anything.
Big, fat, tall, small,
but never what you expect.
Can I take a look at it?
Attenzione. Cucaracha Caputo.
What are you doing?
I'm steering the ship.
Well, you need to watch
where you're going.
You almost got us all killed.
No, I didn't.
I saved the ship.
[MORTEN SCREAMING]
They would have all panicked if I
hadn't shown them I was in charge.
I'll report you, er...
I'll report you
on the hour
to update...
To update you on our course.
You do that.
And no falling asleep
on the job.
Or you'll know
what'll happen to you.
[YAWNING]
[ELIZA SNORING]
You'll never get off
this terriblo ship.
I devoted my whole life
to this machine,
and what happens
when I need it most?
Kaput!
Let me look.
What's this written
on the side?
It's too dark.
I can't read it.
Attenzione!
[MUFFLED SCREAMING]
ANNABELLE: Slippers, please.
Felix?
Slippers.
Slippers. At once, my dear.
You're a bit slow on the
uptake this morning, Felix.
Awfully sorry.
Won't happen again.
It better not,
unless you want to end up
as the world's finest donut.
Don't worry, Daddy.
She's always like that.
Ignore her.
You're right, my darling.
Oh my.
Don't worry, Daddy.
It'll be all right.
What's going on out here?
What happened to the
bowing and scraping?
Long live the queen.
And you are?
- Captain...
- No, not you. You.
- Who me?
- Uh...
Exactly.
Peter, firefly extraordinaire.
And sailor of the seven seas.
I'm also a multi-talented baker.
I don't know if you know that.
Shut it. Lamps should
be seen and not heard.
I am Captain Stinger.
And this is my crew.
So, Captain Stinger,
who gave permission for you
and your crew to board my ship?
Well, it wasn't this boy.
He was tied up at the time.
[STINGER LAUGHING]
And what brings you
to my modest vessel?
I have a proposal for you,
my dear.
A proposal?
How exciting.
It could make us a lot of money.
You begin to interest me,
Captain Stinger.
More money than
we could ever spend.
Do you dance, Captain?
I thought
you'd never ask.
[RECORD PLAYING]
Mm.
[LAUGHS]
So, what do you say,
Queen Annabelle?
I'm thinking about it.
[THUD]
What you need
on this ship is a Captain.
Yes.
One who doesn't
fall asleep at the wheel.
You would never do that,
would you, Captain Stinger?
No, I have a lamp
to keep me awake.
One hundred percent
guaranteed.
Multifunctional,
water and shock-proof,
guaranteed for ten meters
below sea level,
rust-proof and I have
an excellent five-year warranty.
- Shut it, lamp.
- Ow!
Perhaps you should give me
something as a token of goodwill.
Your wish is my command.
Be brave, young man.
Yours is a heroic sacrifice.
Aye, aye, Captain.
ANNABELLE: It's a pleasure
working with you, Captain Stinger.
STINGER: Let this be the start
of a beautiful friendship.
There.
That's where the treasure is.
ANNABELLE: That's just water.
No, my dear. It's tea.
One spoon per person,
and one for pot.
Here you are, Captain.
The treasure's
on the sea bed.
Seven fathoms down.
So, how do we get it?
Just wait and see.
Oh. [BLOWS]
- [ELECTRICITY CRACKLING]
- Oh, no problem. I'm fine.
- A donut, Captain?
- Thank you.
Any good?
Delicious.
Can you give me the recipe?
Did you bring me a donut?
Trust me, you don't want
any of those donuts.
I need some food.
If I get any thinner,
the water will come in.
This will keep you going.
[GASPS]
Thanks.
Is that all you've got?
I can't go on like this forever.
Don't worry, Eliza.
I'll get us out of this.
But how are you
going to do that?
You're just a boy.
Uh...
STINGER: This is the spot.
Prepare to drop anchor.
CREW: Aye, aye, Captain.
Prepare the diver.
But how do we know
that we can trust him?
Felix, I do believe
you're jealous.
I haven't got anything
against him,
but we don't know
anything about him.
And you know what they say
about scorpions.
They can't be trusted.
You worry too much.
Captain Stinger will
make us all rich.
One day, you'll look back
on this moment and laugh.
Hmm. Perhaps,
you're right, my dear.
STINGER: How does that feel?
But I can't swim!
Just as well.
That way, you can't escape.
[LAUGHING]
Let me give you some advice.
For nothing, don't try and move.
Just stay where you are.
Do we have a choice?
Actually, no.
You see, 100%
of the treasure
sounds better
than a measly 50%.
Make sure it'll hold.
Wouldn't want anyone
to lose their balance.
Time for a swimming lesson.
Yeah. Exercise is the secret
of a healthy heart.
Don't worry, my little gooey-goo.
It'll be all right.
[RINGING]
[CHEERING]
[MORTEN BREATHING HEAVILY]
[BOTH STRAINING]
Get him out of that suit
and toss him overboard.
Thanks for your help.
Bye-bye now.
Get him!
Ooh.
Huh?
Mm!
[GASPING]
Is the ship in trouble, Morten?
[WHISPERING] Pirates, Eliza.
No time to talk.
ELIZA: Be careful.
By the way, Eliza,
I'm not just a boy.
I'm a Captain.
And this is my ship.
[GASPING]
- [GASPING]
- Yes.
[STINGER LAUGHING]
And my mother told me
there was no money in piracy.
[STINGER LAUGHING]
Mothers just want
their children to be successful.
My mother
wanted me to shine,
not as a lamp.
[GLASS SHATTERING]
[SCREAMING]
Aah!
Huh?
Oh!
Huh?
[MACHINE SHUTTING DOWN]
[GASPING]
[INDISTINCT CHATTERING]
[ALL EXCLAIMING]
- STINGER: Gotcha.
- Look out!
- MORTEN: Whoa.
- [STINGER GRUNTING]
[MORTEN WHIMPERING]
[GROWLING]
[STINGER SCREAMING]
[STINGER SCREAMING]
[SIGHING IN RELIEF]
Too bad about
your treasure, Captain.
Looks like you'll
never see it now.
[DRUM ROLL]
I couldn't let you
leave with nothing.
Just a little something
to help you back
on the straightened narrow.
[GASPING]
Queen Annabelle,
I think you should reconsider.
Yes. Perhaps,
you're right.
You're such a strong,
handsome Captain.
And we dance
so well together.
But then again, you betrayed
my trust and took over my ship.
You've got to look
at the big picture.
I kept the ship safe.
[LAUGHING NERVOUSLY]
But you see,
I already have a Captain.
- A very brave one.
- Ah!
And they say you should
never trust a scorpion
no matter how well
he can dance the tango.
STINGER: Aah. Aah.
Aah!
But I can't swim.
And I'm allergic to water.
I might even catch a cold.
Help! Peter!
At last, he got it right.
My name's Peter.
And I'm a firefly,
not a lamp.
[STINGER GROANING IN PAIN]
Whoo-hoo-hoo!
PETER:
Yay! Hurray!
I know what
you're all thinking.
Your Queen has
saved you once again.
All hail the queen.
Long may she reign.
Long live the queen.
All kneel
for Her Majesty the queen.
Stop sniveling.
What I need now is a Captain.
And I know
the perfect candidate.
- Tilda.
- What?
Who me?
- But...
- But what, Tilda?
Are you doubting my judgment?
But I have no skills.
No education, no hobbies,
no manners...
But I suppose the queen
knows what she's doing.
We need a proper Captain.
There's danger all around us.
Felix, show this boy
to the crow's nest.
Just look after that flag.
Can you do that for me,
Sweety pie?
Anna, I'll just
take a little walk.
Oh.
[GASPING]
[GASPING]
[RATTLING]
[GASPS]
[GRUNTS]
Whoa!
[RATTLING LOUDER]
Aah!
[GASPING]
Phew.
Oh. Oh, Daddy.
There there.
I told you there was
nothing to worry about.
- Parson.
- Yes?
Jump off to that mast
and untie that line.
Me?
Oh. Aye, aye, Captain.
Zig, untie the other end.
Aye, aye, Captain.
MORTEN: Tilda.
Hmm... Make yourself useful.
Aye, aye, Captain.
Just a minute.
I give the orders on this ship.
[SIGHING]
What's this?
The symbol of your power,
Your Magnificent Majesty.
The crown of crowns.
Can't turn my back for two minutes
without some sort of disaster.
Tilda, you were
responsible for the ship.
In theory,
but Zig was the one...
[STAMMERING] What?
I was doing just fine
until that boy there interfered.
- ANNABELLE: Morten!
- Hmm?
You stand accused
of the crimes of piracy
on the seven seas.
Mutiny and gross
dereliction of duty,
endangering the safety of
other members of the crew,
deserting your post
on the crow's nest,
in addition to which,
you stand accused
of vandalizing our cultural
heritage, and defiling the flag.
We hereby sentence
the accused, Morten Viks,
to be transformed into a plate
of the world's finest donuts.
Mm.
You may proceed.
Oui, madame. I shall proceed.
[HUMMING]
What do you think you're doing?
I'm the Captain.
Help!
- Help!
- ELIZA: I'm coming.
Help!
[GASPING]
That's beautiful.
[GROANING]
No!
[GROANING]
Oh. Ugh.
ELIZA: Hold on.
Stop!
ELIZA: Hold on tight.
BOTH: Whoa! Whoa!
[MORTEN SCREAMING]
[GASPING] Morten!
- [WATER SPLASHING]
- MORTEN: Help!
Help.
[LAUGHING] Huh?
MORTEN: Help! Help!
ELIZA: Come on.
Oh.
[GRUNTING]
What's this suitcase
doing here?
Thanks for saving me, Eliza,
but I have to go back.
You can't.
It's too dangerous.
The ship will sink.
I have to.
It's all right.
I blocked up the hole.
That's great, Eliza.
What did you block it with?
- Some of the cargo.
- [GASPING]
- Sugar?
- Yes.
Then we must go back.
Sugar dissolves in water.
- But you must...
- Oh!
[LAUGHING]
[BOTH STRAINING]
Where are we?
No place for a butterfly.
Hmm.
MORTEN: That's Dad's ship.
STINGER: Mm. Let's see.
Here we are, my beauty.
[HUMMING]
ELIZA: Help! Let me go.
Morten!
This won't hurt a bit.
Aah!
[GASPING]
[GRUNTING]
Aah!
ELIZA: Come on.
Where are you, my beauty?
[GRUNTS]
[OBJECTS CLATTERING]
Come on now.
You can't hide
from me forever.
Come on!
I see your home lacks a certain
feminine touch, Mr. Stinger.
Yes, I'm sorry
about the mess, my love.
I've been working
on my collection.
It contains some
rather interesting objects.
Like this ship's model,
for example.
STINGER: Exactly.
This model proves
once and for all
that the Salamander once belonged
to my ancestor, one-eyed pirate.
Oh. Now I understand your
interest in buying that old...
I mean...
It's a beautiful ship.
It must have
great sentimental value.
STINGER: It means as much to me as
the ballet dance to you, my queen.
There's some fine wood in that ship.
I think I'll have it dismantled.
We've got to stop him Eliza.
STINGER: And you, my dear,
can concentrate on your ballet.
Yes, he's evil.
ANNABELLE: What a kind man
you are, Mr. Stinger.
Drink.
Would he really pull apart
the Salamander?
ANNABELLE: Yes, please.
STINGER:
With the greatest pleasure.
Cheers.
What's the matter?
You're not giving up.
But what can I do.
I'm just a little boy.
No, you're not.
You're a Captain who
never abandons his ship.
- All right. Let's give it a go.
- Yes!
[MELLOW MUSIC PLAYING]
Are you sure now?
I don't have a choice.
Then I'll say goodbye.
We'll see each other again.
I'm sure.
Hmph.
Whoa!
Whoa.
If the water raises anymore,
it'll squash us
against the ceiling.
Aah! Where's Morten?
He'd know what to do.
Oh, God. Where is he?
Where is he?
ANNABELLE: Now, Felix,
show some guts.
FELIX: [RETCHING]
If you insist.
[RETCHING]
CUCARACHA: Come on.
Stupida machina.
Can't even make
a little radish talk.
MORTEN: Mr. Cucaracha.
Ah. It's you, mio amico.
Machine non-function.
Not make radish talk.
[STRAINING]
Here you go.
What's that written
on the side?
"Warning: Keep out
of reach of people
"who don't know
what they are doing."
That's strange.
Let me try.
[MACHINE HISSING]
Daddy, I'm hungry, Daddy.
It works. It works!
E un miracolo.
Machina functiona!
See, you just need to know
what you're doing.
- Give it to me.
- No, I need it.
[STRAINING]
Give it to me!
- [BOTH STRAINING]
- Give it to me!
I'm starving here.
Hello, Sweety pie.
Huh?
- Or is it, "Goodbye"?
- [GUN COCKING]
Huh?
Uh-oh. [SCREAMING]
[ANNABELLE SCREAMING]
[GROANING]
[LAUGHING]
Oh. Looks like it's just
you and me now.
Let me go. This is treason.
Get me out of here
right this instance,
or you'll all end up as donuts.
Felix!
Mm.
[RATTLING]
Huh?
[GASPING]
MORTEN: Hold on tight.
- Parson.
- Me?
Get us to the crow's nest fast.
Come on, Daddy,
show some guts.
[SIGHING]
If you insist.
Parson grasshopper Felix
at your service, Captain Morten.
[SCREAMING]
I'm starving.
I could just die
for a nice donut.
Whoa. Whoa.
Felix!
Felix! Whoa!
[SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING]
See? I told you
we'd meet again.
Sorry?
Morten.
I know. I'm sorry about before.
I didn't realize.
I've got something
to say to you.
Yes, me too.
I feel the same way.
- It's your dad. He's here.
- [GASPS]
ANNABELLE: Hmph.
You can't pay
for your son's upkeep.
You've got huge debts,
and your only asset is the ship.
And no doubt,
you've found a buyer for it.
Here's what I'm
prepared to pay you.
This is what you owe Anna,
plus a small commission
for her trouble.
See, you come out all right.
Don't take it!
He wants to take the Salamander
apart, and sell it
bit by bit.
And she's in on it.
That's it.
- You're grounded.
- CAPTAIN VIKS: Hang on.
You're after that "pirate gold."
Pirate gold?
It... It's a secret.
I am the only one
who knows.
[SCOFFS]
Do you think so?
Remember I was telling you
about One-eye, the pirate?
My great-great-granddad
was there
when the Salamander
was marooned.
One-eye was
turned into a crab.
Before he crawled under a rock,
he was able to say...
The gold is
in the ship's timber.
Great-great granddad managed
to get off the island.
He happened to meet
my great-great-grandmother,
a wonderful lady,
very rich.
She helped him buy the Salamander
from a Shanghai trader.
And they searched the ship
from bell to stern.
BOTH: And?
Nothing. There wasn't any gold.
Nice story.
We don't believe
a word of it.
Hang on a minute.
I read about One-eye
in my pirate book.
He went mad.
He thought his villa
was really his ship.
That must be it.
The gold is in...
The timbers of your house.
Must be off.
Very nice chatting with you.
Come on, Piggy wiggy.
Will the man with the
golden pen take me with him?
Yes, come on,
my butterfly queen.
We'll sell the cafe and
flutter off into the sunset.
Don't worry about us.
We're leaving.
It's over between us, Anna.
I'm going to fill you till you
burst my little piggy wiggy.
She never seems
to have enough.
Always hungry
for more and more.
We'll just have
to feed her more.
Come on, Piggy,
Let's find that treasure.
[VIKS LAUGHING]
Bunch of ticks.
There is no treasure.
But the Salamander's
a treasure.
Right you are, Captain Morten.
Right you are.
[MORTEN CHUCKLING]
[VIKS WHISTLING]
[TRAIN HORN HONKING]
Whoa.
Prepare to cast off.
Aye, aye, Captain Morten.
- Wait for me.
- Huh?
I'm coming with you.
Can she come on board?
You're the Captain, it's our ship.
We can do what we want.
We don't supposed you have
much family left.
You can join us too.
We are always in need of able
sea-men, haven't we, Captain?
[CHUCKLING]
No, we better hang...
You know, we better go.
You know, Mr. Stinger will be waiting.
Yeah. We don't wanna keep
Mr. Stinger waiting. Sorry.
Soon, you'll have
a golden hand
with diamond nails
on every finger, my darling.
Thank you, my dear.
Hey! No sleeping
on the job.
You'd better find that gold,
or you'll be sacked.
But we can't find anything.
Gold fever.
[LAUGHING]
Ticks.
[METAL CLANKING]
[COOING]
[GASPS]
[GASPS]
Oh, look.
Look, Dad. These nails
are made of gold.
Well, look at that.
So there really is a treasure.
And it's holding
the ship together.
What are we gonna do?
Put it back.
That's my boy.
Can we set sail now?
Anchors away, Captain Morten.
Full steam ahead!
[ELIZA CHEERING]
[ALL CHEERING]
MORTEN: Hoist the mainsail.
[ALL CHEERING]
[LIVELY MUSIC PLAYING]
[OPENING THEME MUSIC PLAYING]
[WASP BUZZING]
[SEAGULLS SQUAWKING]
MORTEN: Dad,
when are you coming home?
[PIGEON COOING]
Dear Dad,
when you come home,
can you bring me a, um...
Bring me a...
[GRUNTING]
[GULPING]
[COOING]
- [GASPS]
- Dear Dad,
I'm building a little boat
just like yours.
A bit smaller.
It's got a ship's wheel,
some sails, and an anchor.
Come back soon,
little pigeon.
ELIZA: Morten?
Come on, Morten.
It's the dress rehearsal.
We've got to dance
for Mom and Dad, remember?
[GRUNTS]
[GROANING]
I'm not dancing, Elizabeth.
[SCOFFS]
And those two stuffed parrots
are your mom and dad, not mine.
What sort
of spelling is that?
You'd better fix it,
or I might have to sack you.
MAN 1: This isn't our job.
We're not sign writers.
Or people that can spell.
BOTH: We are sailors.
[ANNABELLE SCOFFS]
The only sea you've ever sailed
in is that bottle of lemonade.
MAN 2: We've got
the tattoos to prove it.
- Oh, yeah.
- Hmm.
Sailors indeed. [SPITS]
All that work for a bowl
of soup and a few donuts?
What kind of life is that?
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
[THUD]
Morten!
Oh, Morten!
[GASPING]
Morten!
[GASPING]
Morten!
[LIVELY MUSIC PLAYING]
Mm.
[EERIE MUSIC PLAYING]
- Ow!
- Leave that fish alone.
What do you mean?
I'm sailing my boat.
Don't contradict me.
Ugh! Ow!
But a Captain never
abandons his ship.
Aah!
[DOOR SLAMS]
ANNABELLE: You are no Captain,
and that's no ship.
It is a ship!
And I am a Captain!
[SIGHING]
One-Eye was one of
the most mysterious figures
in the pirate history,
some historians think he died after
being marooned on a desert island
by his mutinous crew.
Some think, along with his
gold, he lost his mind.
[grunting]
There's a storm coming!
Douse the sails!
MORTEN: In a moment of madness,
he thought his castle was his ship.
Steady! Now, my beauty!
Take me to my treasure!
- [BELL CHIMING]
- Huh?
[gasps]
[STRAINING]
[COOING, SLURPING]
ELIZA: Morten!
[SIGHING]
Huh?
Oh.
CAPTAIN VIKS: Whoo-hoo!
Dad!
Morten! [LAUGHING]
Whoa, whoa.
Huh?
[DAD WHISTLING]
Did you have
a good trip, Captain?
Oh, strange things happen
at sea, Morten.
Did I ever tell you
about the dancing whales?
As light on their tailfins
as ballerinas.
ANNABELLE: Where is Morten?
ELIZA: He's in his room.
That is so unprofessional.
What's he doing in his room?
You shoved him
in there, remember?
Don't talk back. Now...
First position.
[MUSIC BEGINS]
Up.
Higher.
[MUSIC LOOPING]
[GASPING]
How can I have an artistic
thought in my head
when there are
all these interruptions?
[DOOR OPENS]
Here I am.
[MUSIC WINDS DOWN]
Oh, Captain Viks.
Welcome back.
Make yourself at home.
Thank you.
[WHISTLING]
Hmm. How did you get out...
Such lovely curls.
So, Captain, I imagine
your trip was full
of the most
unbelievable adventures.
All believable, but fascinating.
When I was sailing
in the south seas,
I was invited to tea
by some friendly locals.
[STRAINING]
Aah!
[YELLING]
We had decks to swab
and ropes to knot.
We didn't have time
to hang around simmering
until I was tender.
So, I had to decline
their kind invitation.
- And as chance would have it...
- [SCREAMING]
we met an old friend
who took me back to the ship.
That pigeon earned
his corn always.
[GOBBLING]
[COOING]
Then it was time for me
to come back home.
Oh. How exciting
that must have been, Captain.
Incredible.
- [SLURPING] -ANNABELLE: Ah,
the best donuts in the world.
Mmm. Divine.
Light as a butterfly,
Elizabeth. Remember.
No donuts for you, dear.
- [KNOCKING ON WINDOW]
- Huh?
Time to weigh anchor.
Already?
Time and tide wait for no man.
[MORTEN GRUNTING]
[DOOR SLAMS]
MORTEN: Go away.
Aye, aye, Captain.
Anchors away.
Uh...
You miss your mother?
We do too, you know?
I wish she'd never gone
to sail with me.
It was so cold
at the South Pole that
we thought we'd never make it
back to the ship.
That's when your mother
decided to become a penguin.
We don't blame her.
Most easily, become one myself.
[CLEARS THROAT]
You know that's not true, Dad.
[KNOCKING AT DOOR]
[PIGEON WHISTLING]
Time to go.
I want to come with you.
One day, I'll take you.
In the meantime,
you might want to store the
anchor for that ship of yours.
You'll be brave now, won't you?
[SIGHING]
ANNABELLE: You needn't worry.
We are very happy to look after Morten.
We love him as if he
were our own child.
Not much to shell
from this trip.
FELIX: Hmm.
ANNABELLE: No.
Hardly dents your account.
He'll never be able to pay us
what he owes us.
Don't worry, my dear.
I have a plan.
I'll find all
the One-eye's pirate gold
if we have to pull every nail
out of its stinking hull.
[CHIRPING]
[WASPS BUZZING]
Morten?
That's beautiful.
Oh.
Huh?
[GASPS]
Be a good lad and tell you
mother Mr. Stinger is here.
She's not my mother.
Just tell her.
And say out of my way
when I visit
my Butterfly Queen.
[MAN VOCALIZING]
Wanna go to the show?
Yeah. Why not?
Come on, Killer.
Fog machine.
Unbelievemente.
Incredibile.
Maestro Cucaracha super check.
Buy a ticket. It's very cheap.
Come on. [TALKING GIBBERISH]
[SILENCE]
Woof.
[CASTING SPELL]
- Change this doggy.
- Huh?
Wait and see.
[DOG BARKING]
- Grazie. Grazie.
- That's some trick.
[SQUASH]
- [DOG WHIMPERING]
- Whoops.
STINGER: We used to queue
for hours to watch you dance.
[GLASSES CLINKING]
Oh, please.
Don't bring up
those unpleasant memories.
[CROWD CHEERING]
Aah!
[CROWD EXCLAIMING]
[SIGHING]
A most unfortunate
accident indeed.
Nowadays,
I choreograph ballets.
I call this piece
"Butterfly in Blue."
You can be first mate.
ANNABELLE:
Morten, pay attention.
Turn Killer back now.
He doesn't like being little.
And possibly, dead.
There's just
a slight technicality.
A dimensional problem.
Just give me a second.
Cucaracha Caputo.
[CUCARACHA HUFFING]
- Look. Over there! Dolphins!
- Huh?
Those are penguins, you liar.
Cheat, get him!
[CUCARACHA SCREAMING]
MAN: Come back!
Hold it right there.
[PIANO MUSIC PLAYING]
ANNABELLE: Stop that at once.
Oh!
So unprofessional.
I said stop it!
Felix, go and check.
Aha!
What have we here?
[SCREAMS]
- [SNORING]
- FELIX: A spider!
[SCREAMING]
Oh!
Bravo!
Did you like it?
Oh, the finale was just...
Astonishing!
ANNABELLE: Oh, imagine what I
could do if I had a real theater
with professional dancers.
But...
That would cost so much.
The Captain owes you money.
Make him pay up.
ANNABELLE: Captain Viks
hasn't got any money.
He'll never pay me
what he owes me
for looking after
that boy of his.
But what about the boat?
Nobody would buy
that stinky old rust bucket.
I wouldn't be so sure.
Someone might
get tricked into it.
Let me sign your guestbook
with my golden pen before I go.
Please do.
There's a place where
you can leave a comment.
About my ballet.
Oh!
MORTEN: Come on.
This is the ship's wheel.
You have to go
and hang on to it.
STINGER: Goodbye, my dear.
A real sailor wouldn't play with
a boat like that in the bath.
[LAUGHING] Salamander.
[BURPING]
Zigfred, Zackfred,
your'e wanted.
Gotcha.
[WHISTLING]
MAN: All right. We're coming.
[BRANCH CRACKING]
Uh, uh. What do you think?
Spanner?
Hacksaw? Hammer?
Eh, chewing gum?
Oh, good man.
Thanks.
Not for you, you fool!
Easy for a pair
of old sailors like us.
[LAUGHING]
Aah!
[GURGLING]
My lovely floor!
Uh. No, no problem.
No problem. We can fix it.
We can fix this.
[LAUGHING]
No problem. It's okay.
Aah!
It's a beautiful ship.
MORTEN: Just magic.
If it was a real ship,
with real sailors...
I would be... Ow!
- [MORTEN SCREAMING] -ANNABELLE:
This is all your fault.
I give you food,
an education, culture...
And you just throw it
back in my face.
You, and that father of yours
will be begging in the streets
by the time
I'm finished with you.
Dad, where are you?
- [CUCARACHA SCREAMING]
- Hmm?
[CUCARACHA SCREAMING]
[GASPS]
[MACHINE RATTLING]
Stupido machine, stop!
[STRAINING]
[CUCARACHA SCREAMING]
[GASPING]
[MORTEN GRUNTS]
[GROANING]
[FLUTTERING]
[GASPING]
[GASPING]
Ya!
[MORTEN GROANING]
Mm.
Whoa.
[SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING]
[FLOORBOARD CREAKING]
[SHIP CREAKING]
[LIVELY MUSIC PLAYING]
MORTEN: I'm a Captain.
And this is my ship.
Aye, aye, Captain Morten.
Prepare to cast off.
Aye, aye, Captain Morten.
Whoa.
Full steam ahead!
[GASPING]
- Perhaps my brother and I...
- Can be of assistance?
Yes. You hold her steady
while I check the rigging.
[LAUGHING MOCKINGLY]
Is that your idea of a joke?
Very funny. Ha ha.
Hey! What do you think
you're doing?
I'm the Captain.
[LAUGHING]
The Captain.
MORTEN: Stop it. Let me go!
Let go of me.
WASP 1: Time for a bit
of swimming practice.
But I can't swim.
Well, that's just
too bad, isn't it?
[LAUGHING] It's never
too late to learn.
Help! Somebody!
- FELIX: Gentlemen?
- [BOTH GASPING]
Can you please
refrain from shouting?
The queen is asleep.
- It was him!
- Whoa, Whoa!
- [STAMMERING] No.
- [MORTEN SCREAMING]
You're the one
that was shouting.
[MUFFLED SCREAMS]
Good gracious. Who is this
unfortunate creature?
I have no idea.
Help!
- Help!
- Hmm.
Lovely day for a swim.
Have we met before?
Help! Somebody!
Don't just stand there,
you fools.
- Rescue him.
- Oh. Right.
MORTEN: Help.
Careful with him.
He looks as if he might break.
- Whoa.
- [MORTEN STRAINING]
[COUGHING]
Parson, these sea-men are
out of control.
Lock them in the hull!
Of course. Aye, aye.
Avec plaisir. Right away.
Throw him in the hull.
He can be next.
[DOOR ROLLING]
[MORTEN SCREAMING]
[DOOR SHUTS]
[GASPING]
Is that sugar?
[STRAINING]
[GRUNTING]
- [SOBBING]
- Huh?
[SOBBING]
Hey, don't touch me!
Who's that?
Eliza.
What are you doing here?
I was just minding
my own business,
enjoying the sunshine.
Then suddenly something
picked me up,
and flung me
into this dark pit.
I tried eating my way out,
but that just made
things worse.
Whoa!
I had to plug the hole,
and I've been sitting here ever since.
Sitting, and sitting. I'll probably
go on sitting here forever and ever.
What kinda person would
do something like that?
I mean, throw me
into this dungeon.
I'm sure whoever did it
didn't mean to hurt you.
Aw!
- Oh, please stop crying.
- [CRYING]
We'll sort it out.
Hey, you up there.
Hurry.
There's a hole in the hull.
Quiet down, you idiot.
MORTEN:
What's the matter with you?
- Can't you hear me?
- What is that awful noise?
It's a surprise for you.
You'll love it.
Always looking out for me,
aren't you, Felix?
I do my best, mon amour.
Ha!
Prepare the prisoner.
I want him all in one piece.
Make way for the queen.
[FANFARE]
All kneel
for Her Majesty, the queen.
Long live her most
beautiful gorgeousness.
Huh?
ALL: Long live the queen.
Thank you,
my dear loyal subjects.
And don't worry. I shall definitely
live longer than any of you.
[ANNABELLE LAUGHING]
A guest.
A very tasty guest,
my lovely Queen.
Why isn't he kneeling?
Well, you always wanted to know
what little boys are made of.
Oh, yes. He's very little.
And so cute.
This is your Captain speaking!
There's a hole in the hull.
I repeat,
there's a hole in the hull.
Who told you that?
I saw it for myself.
I'm sure you didn't.
Yes, I did. With my own eyes.
We need to patch it up.
- Or we'll sink.
- [GRUNTING]
[BOTH EXCLAIMING]
Hmm. I think not.
[gasps]
Oh!
In case you hadn't noticed,
I'm the one in charge here.
If I say, "Bow,"
you bow.
If I say, "Jump,"
- you ask, "How, how?"
- [SCREAMING]
Most important of all,
when I say, "Dance,"
you'll dance. Felix?
Music please.
With pleasure.
[RECORD PLAYING]
Mm?
What do you think, Annabelle?
Time to eat?
Nothing like a work of art
to stimulate the appetite.
This one's very fresh.
On the other hand,
you are a good dancer.
Really?
And do we really need two wasps?
After all, they're identical.
Same tattoos, same stingers,
same personality.
What's the point of having two?
No, no, no.
We're totally different.
Nothing like each other.
Absolutely nothing in common.
Goodbye, bro.
WASP 1: Oh, I'll miss you.
No, I think not as much
as I miss you.
No, really. I'll miss you more.
I'll miss you much more.
[WASPS CONTINUE ARGUING]
Stop that at once.
We'll have no fighting.
We'll just leave it to chance.
Shall we?
Huh.
Huh?
[GROWLING]
[LAUGHING]
Aah! No. No!
Best of three. Best of three.
Please, best of three!
I don't think so.
[WHIMPERING]
Whoa!
Aah!
[WHIMPERING]
[RECORD PLAYING]
[CRYING]
[GASPING]
[CRYING]
Oh. The best donuts
in the world.
And all possible
because of the sacrifice
made by a heroic wasp.
Delicious. Mm.
Absolutely divine.
Mm!
You're so good.
[GULPING]
Oh, God, I miss you. I would've shared.
Oh, you aren't here.
But you know what I mean.
Oh, God. I'm so confused.
[MUNCHING]
Now where's
my little sweety pie.
[GASPING]
Come on! We've got
to clear the decks.
Sorry?
Get below
before it's too late.
Darling, if I didn't
like your style,
you'd be a plate
of donuts by now.
But you must realize
this is my party,
and nobody leaves
until I say so.
[ALL GASPING]
Let's go below.
[DOOR OPENS]
Oh!
WASP 2: Oh!
Fear not, my sweet.
Daddy will look after you.
[ALL WHIMPERING AND SCREAMING]
Felix, show some guts.
If... [RETCHING]
You insist. [RETCHING]
[BOTH MUNCHING]
Bit tastelessness and, uh...
Yeah, not very filling.
All it needs is some sugar...
ALL: Whoa!
Help!
Help.
Help!
[CUCARACHA SCREAMING]
Man overboard.
Cucaracha Caputo.
Help.
MORTEN: Hold on, Mr. Cucaracha.
[CUCARACHA SCREAMING]
Help!
Help.
Don't worry. Daddy's here.
We're going to drown.
Aah!
I can't keep
the water out much longer.
[WASP SCREAMING]
Calm down, everyone.
There is nothing
to be scared of.
How do you know that,
Queen Annabelle?
I mean, how do you know?
I just know, all right?
[STRAINING]
Hey, hey! We did it!
See? I told you there was
nothing to be scared of.
Right as always, my dear.
Come on now. Eat up.
ELIZA: Oh, I'm starving.
- Who said that?
- It's me. Eliza.
Just look at you, girl.
I'm tired, I'm cold.
And I'm starving.
And you're fat.
Fat as a pregnant pig.
Can I just have
one little donut, please?
[CRYING]
You know how much
I love you, don't you?
Yes, I suppose so.
That's why you can't
have any donuts.
It's for your own good.
Just one.
If I get any thinner,
the water will come in.
ANNABELLE:
The answer is still no.
One day,
you'll thank me for it.
Mm.
[ELIZA CRYING]
That was a close call.
Capitano, terrible accidente.
The magical fog machine
e distrutta.
Magic fog machine?
Is that what
made this happen?
My fog machine
can do ab-solutamente anything.
Big, fat, tall, small,
but never what you expect.
Can I take a look at it?
Attenzione. Cucaracha Caputo.
What are you doing?
I'm steering the ship.
Well, you need to watch
where you're going.
You almost got us all killed.
No, I didn't.
I saved the ship.
[MORTEN SCREAMING]
They would have all panicked if I
hadn't shown them I was in charge.
I'll report you, er...
I'll report you
on the hour
to update...
To update you on our course.
You do that.
And no falling asleep
on the job.
Or you'll know
what'll happen to you.
[YAWNING]
[ELIZA SNORING]
You'll never get off
this terriblo ship.
I devoted my whole life
to this machine,
and what happens
when I need it most?
Kaput!
Let me look.
What's this written
on the side?
It's too dark.
I can't read it.
Attenzione!
[MUFFLED SCREAMING]
ANNABELLE: Slippers, please.
Felix?
Slippers.
Slippers. At once, my dear.
You're a bit slow on the
uptake this morning, Felix.
Awfully sorry.
Won't happen again.
It better not,
unless you want to end up
as the world's finest donut.
Don't worry, Daddy.
She's always like that.
Ignore her.
You're right, my darling.
Oh my.
Don't worry, Daddy.
It'll be all right.
What's going on out here?
What happened to the
bowing and scraping?
Long live the queen.
And you are?
- Captain...
- No, not you. You.
- Who me?
- Uh...
Exactly.
Peter, firefly extraordinaire.
And sailor of the seven seas.
I'm also a multi-talented baker.
I don't know if you know that.
Shut it. Lamps should
be seen and not heard.
I am Captain Stinger.
And this is my crew.
So, Captain Stinger,
who gave permission for you
and your crew to board my ship?
Well, it wasn't this boy.
He was tied up at the time.
[STINGER LAUGHING]
And what brings you
to my modest vessel?
I have a proposal for you,
my dear.
A proposal?
How exciting.
It could make us a lot of money.
You begin to interest me,
Captain Stinger.
More money than
we could ever spend.
Do you dance, Captain?
I thought
you'd never ask.
[RECORD PLAYING]
Mm.
[LAUGHS]
So, what do you say,
Queen Annabelle?
I'm thinking about it.
[THUD]
What you need
on this ship is a Captain.
Yes.
One who doesn't
fall asleep at the wheel.
You would never do that,
would you, Captain Stinger?
No, I have a lamp
to keep me awake.
One hundred percent
guaranteed.
Multifunctional,
water and shock-proof,
guaranteed for ten meters
below sea level,
rust-proof and I have
an excellent five-year warranty.
- Shut it, lamp.
- Ow!
Perhaps you should give me
something as a token of goodwill.
Your wish is my command.
Be brave, young man.
Yours is a heroic sacrifice.
Aye, aye, Captain.
ANNABELLE: It's a pleasure
working with you, Captain Stinger.
STINGER: Let this be the start
of a beautiful friendship.
There.
That's where the treasure is.
ANNABELLE: That's just water.
No, my dear. It's tea.
One spoon per person,
and one for pot.
Here you are, Captain.
The treasure's
on the sea bed.
Seven fathoms down.
So, how do we get it?
Just wait and see.
Oh. [BLOWS]
- [ELECTRICITY CRACKLING]
- Oh, no problem. I'm fine.
- A donut, Captain?
- Thank you.
Any good?
Delicious.
Can you give me the recipe?
Did you bring me a donut?
Trust me, you don't want
any of those donuts.
I need some food.
If I get any thinner,
the water will come in.
This will keep you going.
[GASPS]
Thanks.
Is that all you've got?
I can't go on like this forever.
Don't worry, Eliza.
I'll get us out of this.
But how are you
going to do that?
You're just a boy.
Uh...
STINGER: This is the spot.
Prepare to drop anchor.
CREW: Aye, aye, Captain.
Prepare the diver.
But how do we know
that we can trust him?
Felix, I do believe
you're jealous.
I haven't got anything
against him,
but we don't know
anything about him.
And you know what they say
about scorpions.
They can't be trusted.
You worry too much.
Captain Stinger will
make us all rich.
One day, you'll look back
on this moment and laugh.
Hmm. Perhaps,
you're right, my dear.
STINGER: How does that feel?
But I can't swim!
Just as well.
That way, you can't escape.
[LAUGHING]
Let me give you some advice.
For nothing, don't try and move.
Just stay where you are.
Do we have a choice?
Actually, no.
You see, 100%
of the treasure
sounds better
than a measly 50%.
Make sure it'll hold.
Wouldn't want anyone
to lose their balance.
Time for a swimming lesson.
Yeah. Exercise is the secret
of a healthy heart.
Don't worry, my little gooey-goo.
It'll be all right.
[RINGING]
[CHEERING]
[MORTEN BREATHING HEAVILY]
[BOTH STRAINING]
Get him out of that suit
and toss him overboard.
Thanks for your help.
Bye-bye now.
Get him!
Ooh.
Huh?
Mm!
[GASPING]
Is the ship in trouble, Morten?
[WHISPERING] Pirates, Eliza.
No time to talk.
ELIZA: Be careful.
By the way, Eliza,
I'm not just a boy.
I'm a Captain.
And this is my ship.
[GASPING]
- [GASPING]
- Yes.
[STINGER LAUGHING]
And my mother told me
there was no money in piracy.
[STINGER LAUGHING]
Mothers just want
their children to be successful.
My mother
wanted me to shine,
not as a lamp.
[GLASS SHATTERING]
[SCREAMING]
Aah!
Huh?
Oh!
Huh?
[MACHINE SHUTTING DOWN]
[GASPING]
[INDISTINCT CHATTERING]
[ALL EXCLAIMING]
- STINGER: Gotcha.
- Look out!
- MORTEN: Whoa.
- [STINGER GRUNTING]
[MORTEN WHIMPERING]
[GROWLING]
[STINGER SCREAMING]
[STINGER SCREAMING]
[SIGHING IN RELIEF]
Too bad about
your treasure, Captain.
Looks like you'll
never see it now.
[DRUM ROLL]
I couldn't let you
leave with nothing.
Just a little something
to help you back
on the straightened narrow.
[GASPING]
Queen Annabelle,
I think you should reconsider.
Yes. Perhaps,
you're right.
You're such a strong,
handsome Captain.
And we dance
so well together.
But then again, you betrayed
my trust and took over my ship.
You've got to look
at the big picture.
I kept the ship safe.
[LAUGHING NERVOUSLY]
But you see,
I already have a Captain.
- A very brave one.
- Ah!
And they say you should
never trust a scorpion
no matter how well
he can dance the tango.
STINGER: Aah. Aah.
Aah!
But I can't swim.
And I'm allergic to water.
I might even catch a cold.
Help! Peter!
At last, he got it right.
My name's Peter.
And I'm a firefly,
not a lamp.
[STINGER GROANING IN PAIN]
Whoo-hoo-hoo!
PETER:
Yay! Hurray!
I know what
you're all thinking.
Your Queen has
saved you once again.
All hail the queen.
Long may she reign.
Long live the queen.
All kneel
for Her Majesty the queen.
Stop sniveling.
What I need now is a Captain.
And I know
the perfect candidate.
- Tilda.
- What?
Who me?
- But...
- But what, Tilda?
Are you doubting my judgment?
But I have no skills.
No education, no hobbies,
no manners...
But I suppose the queen
knows what she's doing.
We need a proper Captain.
There's danger all around us.
Felix, show this boy
to the crow's nest.
Just look after that flag.
Can you do that for me,
Sweety pie?
Anna, I'll just
take a little walk.
Oh.
[GASPING]
[GASPING]
[RATTLING]
[GASPS]
[GRUNTS]
Whoa!
[RATTLING LOUDER]
Aah!
[GASPING]
Phew.
Oh. Oh, Daddy.
There there.
I told you there was
nothing to worry about.
- Parson.
- Yes?
Jump off to that mast
and untie that line.
Me?
Oh. Aye, aye, Captain.
Zig, untie the other end.
Aye, aye, Captain.
MORTEN: Tilda.
Hmm... Make yourself useful.
Aye, aye, Captain.
Just a minute.
I give the orders on this ship.
[SIGHING]
What's this?
The symbol of your power,
Your Magnificent Majesty.
The crown of crowns.
Can't turn my back for two minutes
without some sort of disaster.
Tilda, you were
responsible for the ship.
In theory,
but Zig was the one...
[STAMMERING] What?
I was doing just fine
until that boy there interfered.
- ANNABELLE: Morten!
- Hmm?
You stand accused
of the crimes of piracy
on the seven seas.
Mutiny and gross
dereliction of duty,
endangering the safety of
other members of the crew,
deserting your post
on the crow's nest,
in addition to which,
you stand accused
of vandalizing our cultural
heritage, and defiling the flag.
We hereby sentence
the accused, Morten Viks,
to be transformed into a plate
of the world's finest donuts.
Mm.
You may proceed.
Oui, madame. I shall proceed.
[HUMMING]
What do you think you're doing?
I'm the Captain.
Help!
- Help!
- ELIZA: I'm coming.
Help!
[GASPING]
That's beautiful.
[GROANING]
No!
[GROANING]
Oh. Ugh.
ELIZA: Hold on.
Stop!
ELIZA: Hold on tight.
BOTH: Whoa! Whoa!
[MORTEN SCREAMING]
[GASPING] Morten!
- [WATER SPLASHING]
- MORTEN: Help!
Help.
[LAUGHING] Huh?
MORTEN: Help! Help!
ELIZA: Come on.
Oh.
[GRUNTING]
What's this suitcase
doing here?
Thanks for saving me, Eliza,
but I have to go back.
You can't.
It's too dangerous.
The ship will sink.
I have to.
It's all right.
I blocked up the hole.
That's great, Eliza.
What did you block it with?
- Some of the cargo.
- [GASPING]
- Sugar?
- Yes.
Then we must go back.
Sugar dissolves in water.
- But you must...
- Oh!
[LAUGHING]
[BOTH STRAINING]
Where are we?
No place for a butterfly.
Hmm.
MORTEN: That's Dad's ship.
STINGER: Mm. Let's see.
Here we are, my beauty.
[HUMMING]
ELIZA: Help! Let me go.
Morten!
This won't hurt a bit.
Aah!
[GASPING]
[GRUNTING]
Aah!
ELIZA: Come on.
Where are you, my beauty?
[GRUNTS]
[OBJECTS CLATTERING]
Come on now.
You can't hide
from me forever.
Come on!
I see your home lacks a certain
feminine touch, Mr. Stinger.
Yes, I'm sorry
about the mess, my love.
I've been working
on my collection.
It contains some
rather interesting objects.
Like this ship's model,
for example.
STINGER: Exactly.
This model proves
once and for all
that the Salamander once belonged
to my ancestor, one-eyed pirate.
Oh. Now I understand your
interest in buying that old...
I mean...
It's a beautiful ship.
It must have
great sentimental value.
STINGER: It means as much to me as
the ballet dance to you, my queen.
There's some fine wood in that ship.
I think I'll have it dismantled.
We've got to stop him Eliza.
STINGER: And you, my dear,
can concentrate on your ballet.
Yes, he's evil.
ANNABELLE: What a kind man
you are, Mr. Stinger.
Drink.
Would he really pull apart
the Salamander?
ANNABELLE: Yes, please.
STINGER:
With the greatest pleasure.
Cheers.
What's the matter?
You're not giving up.
But what can I do.
I'm just a little boy.
No, you're not.
You're a Captain who
never abandons his ship.
- All right. Let's give it a go.
- Yes!
[MELLOW MUSIC PLAYING]
Are you sure now?
I don't have a choice.
Then I'll say goodbye.
We'll see each other again.
I'm sure.
Hmph.
Whoa!
Whoa.
If the water raises anymore,
it'll squash us
against the ceiling.
Aah! Where's Morten?
He'd know what to do.
Oh, God. Where is he?
Where is he?
ANNABELLE: Now, Felix,
show some guts.
FELIX: [RETCHING]
If you insist.
[RETCHING]
CUCARACHA: Come on.
Stupida machina.
Can't even make
a little radish talk.
MORTEN: Mr. Cucaracha.
Ah. It's you, mio amico.
Machine non-function.
Not make radish talk.
[STRAINING]
Here you go.
What's that written
on the side?
"Warning: Keep out
of reach of people
"who don't know
what they are doing."
That's strange.
Let me try.
[MACHINE HISSING]
Daddy, I'm hungry, Daddy.
It works. It works!
E un miracolo.
Machina functiona!
See, you just need to know
what you're doing.
- Give it to me.
- No, I need it.
[STRAINING]
Give it to me!
- [BOTH STRAINING]
- Give it to me!
I'm starving here.
Hello, Sweety pie.
Huh?
- Or is it, "Goodbye"?
- [GUN COCKING]
Huh?
Uh-oh. [SCREAMING]
[ANNABELLE SCREAMING]
[GROANING]
[LAUGHING]
Oh. Looks like it's just
you and me now.
Let me go. This is treason.
Get me out of here
right this instance,
or you'll all end up as donuts.
Felix!
Mm.
[RATTLING]
Huh?
[GASPING]
MORTEN: Hold on tight.
- Parson.
- Me?
Get us to the crow's nest fast.
Come on, Daddy,
show some guts.
[SIGHING]
If you insist.
Parson grasshopper Felix
at your service, Captain Morten.
[SCREAMING]
I'm starving.
I could just die
for a nice donut.
Whoa. Whoa.
Felix!
Felix! Whoa!
[SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING]
See? I told you
we'd meet again.
Sorry?
Morten.
I know. I'm sorry about before.
I didn't realize.
I've got something
to say to you.
Yes, me too.
I feel the same way.
- It's your dad. He's here.
- [GASPS]
ANNABELLE: Hmph.
You can't pay
for your son's upkeep.
You've got huge debts,
and your only asset is the ship.
And no doubt,
you've found a buyer for it.
Here's what I'm
prepared to pay you.
This is what you owe Anna,
plus a small commission
for her trouble.
See, you come out all right.
Don't take it!
He wants to take the Salamander
apart, and sell it
bit by bit.
And she's in on it.
That's it.
- You're grounded.
- CAPTAIN VIKS: Hang on.
You're after that "pirate gold."
Pirate gold?
It... It's a secret.
I am the only one
who knows.
[SCOFFS]
Do you think so?
Remember I was telling you
about One-eye, the pirate?
My great-great-granddad
was there
when the Salamander
was marooned.
One-eye was
turned into a crab.
Before he crawled under a rock,
he was able to say...
The gold is
in the ship's timber.
Great-great granddad managed
to get off the island.
He happened to meet
my great-great-grandmother,
a wonderful lady,
very rich.
She helped him buy the Salamander
from a Shanghai trader.
And they searched the ship
from bell to stern.
BOTH: And?
Nothing. There wasn't any gold.
Nice story.
We don't believe
a word of it.
Hang on a minute.
I read about One-eye
in my pirate book.
He went mad.
He thought his villa
was really his ship.
That must be it.
The gold is in...
The timbers of your house.
Must be off.
Very nice chatting with you.
Come on, Piggy wiggy.
Will the man with the
golden pen take me with him?
Yes, come on,
my butterfly queen.
We'll sell the cafe and
flutter off into the sunset.
Don't worry about us.
We're leaving.
It's over between us, Anna.
I'm going to fill you till you
burst my little piggy wiggy.
She never seems
to have enough.
Always hungry
for more and more.
We'll just have
to feed her more.
Come on, Piggy,
Let's find that treasure.
[VIKS LAUGHING]
Bunch of ticks.
There is no treasure.
But the Salamander's
a treasure.
Right you are, Captain Morten.
Right you are.
[MORTEN CHUCKLING]
[VIKS WHISTLING]
[TRAIN HORN HONKING]
Whoa.
Prepare to cast off.
Aye, aye, Captain Morten.
- Wait for me.
- Huh?
I'm coming with you.
Can she come on board?
You're the Captain, it's our ship.
We can do what we want.
We don't supposed you have
much family left.
You can join us too.
We are always in need of able
sea-men, haven't we, Captain?
[CHUCKLING]
No, we better hang...
You know, we better go.
You know, Mr. Stinger will be waiting.
Yeah. We don't wanna keep
Mr. Stinger waiting. Sorry.
Soon, you'll have
a golden hand
with diamond nails
on every finger, my darling.
Thank you, my dear.
Hey! No sleeping
on the job.
You'd better find that gold,
or you'll be sacked.
But we can't find anything.
Gold fever.
[LAUGHING]
Ticks.
[METAL CLANKING]
[COOING]
[GASPS]
[GASPS]
Oh, look.
Look, Dad. These nails
are made of gold.
Well, look at that.
So there really is a treasure.
And it's holding
the ship together.
What are we gonna do?
Put it back.
That's my boy.
Can we set sail now?
Anchors away, Captain Morten.
Full steam ahead!
[ELIZA CHEERING]
[ALL CHEERING]
MORTEN: Hoist the mainsail.
[ALL CHEERING]
[LIVELY MUSIC PLAYING]