Chaos on the Farm (2023) Movie Script

[somber music]
[crows cawing]
[dog barking]
[dog barking continues]
[Farmer exhales]
[dog barking]
[dog barking continues]
[dog whines]
- Rufus. Come here, boy.
- Rufus.
Rufus, stop playing
around. Come on here.
Oh my God.
Rufus, where you at?
Oh, Rufus.
What happened?
[Farmer gagging]
[crows cawing]
[somber music]
[Jessica sobs]
- Hey, Jessica. I thought
I'd find you here.
- Hi, Kathy. Just when I think
I'm out of tears, you know.
- It's okay.
Nobody's judging you.
I miss her too.
- You know, everybody
says it gets easier,
but I don't think that's true.
- It does, eventually.
Everybody grieves differently.
All those self-help
books you've been reading
are just ideas.
You're the one who
has to actually do it.
- So, what brings you here?
I'm sure you didn't
come to hear me
catch Mom up on current events.
- The last bit of business
from your mom's will.
- What's going on?
- The inheritance
for your Aunt Susan.
- What do you want
me to do with this?
- I haven't been able
to get ahold of her
or your Uncle
Lawrence in a while
and someone needs to
drive out to the farm.
- What? You want me to do that?
- It could be a real nice trip.
Take Sam with you.
Make a weekend of it.
- I don't know, Kathy.
I don't think I'm up for that
type of socializing right now.
Maybe you could
put it in the mail?
- Oh, no. It's too much
money to trust to the mail.
Besides, you should be
with family right now.
You know, get away
for a few days.
How long has it been since
you've seen your aunt and uncle?
- Honestly, since I was a kid.
It's hard to stay in touch.
- So, go rebuild
that connection.
Your mom may be gone, but you
still have family out there.
- When was the last
time you talked to them?
- A few months ago when
we were settling the will,
but they haven't been
answering their phone
in a little while.
You know how country folk
get about technology.
Well, anyway, I left a message
saying that you'd be coming out
for a few days with a check,
so it shouldn't be a
surprise when you get there.
- Thanks, Kathy.
I'll think about it.
I promise.
[traffic distantly roaring]
[door creaks]
Well, that's just irresponsible.
- [Sam] What is?
- Why would you ever make out
a cashier's check for that much?
[Sam whistles]
- That's a lot of zeros.
- I know, right?
- Did you know your mom was
sitting on this kind of money?
You could have hired
a nurse with that,
take some of the
strain off of you.
- Yeah, she would
have hated that,
having to let someone see her
vulnerable and struggling.
No. She took care of us.
Anyways, I got to spend
more time with her
the past few months
than I had in years.
She was my roommate.
My best friend.
- You sure you're
ready to do this?
We can take some more time.
You can try and wire
the money to them.
- This is their money, so
we need to get it to them.
- You sure? Do
they even want it?
- [Jessica] What do you mean?
- I'm not trying to be
a jerk here, okay?
I just, but think about
it. You barely know 'em.
They didn't once offer to help.
They didn't bother to
show up for the funeral,
and now, suddenly,
you're just gonna show up
and hand them a bunch of money.
- It kind of feels like a
reward for bad behavior, huh?
- Exactly like that.
Why should you give them this?
- It's what Mom wanted.
- Yeah, you're right,
and that whole other thing.
- What thing?
- You hate the country.
- I don't hate the country.
- Yes, you do.
Every time we have to drive
outside the city limits,
you start complaining
about the bad food.
- This is family.
It's not some poorly
planned camping trip
with you and your friends.
- Hey, that poorly
planned camping trip
was a milestone in
our relationship.
Besides, now we all know
what poison ivy
looks like for sure.
[both chuckles]
- But they're still family.
I'm sure they'll be happy
to see you regardless.
- You know you don't have
to come with me, right?
- I've got more vacation time
than I know what to do with.
It'll be good to get away for
a bit, get some fresh air.
Maybe drink some lemonade
on a porch swing
while somebody plays
banjo in the distance.
- Thanks, Sam. I love you.
- I love you, too.
[gentle music]
- [Podcaster] ...that were shot
and killed that day.
- [Podcaster] We appreciate you
taking time to spend with us.
- [Podcaster] Please make sure
you subscribe on the socials.
- [Sam] That was pretty good.
I mean, it could have been
shorter by a couple episodes.
Jessica.
Jessica!
- [Jessica] Sorry, what?
- I asked if you wanted to
pick the next podcast.
You okay?
- I think it's just sinking
in that we're doing this.
- [Sam] It's not too
late to turn back.
- No, we're not turning around.
I just hope they got my message.
- You still can't
get ahold of 'em?
- No. I tried again at the
gas station and still nothing.
What if they're out of town?
- I don't think
they get out much.
- It's just a lot.
I feel like I'm about to
meet 'em for the first time.
- Come on, babe. I mean,
you've told me all about 'em.
- But those are
childhood memories.
What if the people I'm
remembering are from
some commercial I
saw when I was eight,
and not actually them?
- I think you're
getting yourself
all worked up over nothing.
- Right, maybe, but it's
hard to not overthink this.
- [Sam] I'm just saying that,
until there's something
to be worried about,
there's nothing to worry about.
Just focus on rebuilding
the relationship first.
Everything else is secondary.
- I suppose you're right,
and if it gets awkward,
we can just leave.
- [Sam] Exactly.
Besides, if you want to be
worried about something,
it should be about us
getting lost out here.
The cell service is sketch.
- That's not a bad thing.
No notifications for a
few days sounds nice.
- Yeah, except, if podcasts
have taught me anything,
it's that pretty
city people like us
go missing in the country.
Years later, they find
our bones in the compost
or folded up in
the trunk of a car.
[Jessica chuckles]
[gentle music]
- [Jessica] This
must be the place.
- [Sam] At least I hope so.
- Here we go.
[door creaks]
[Susan gasps]
- Hello, little Jessica.
Oh, come here.
- Hi, Aunt Susan.
It's been awhile.
- I have missed you so much.
Oh, I am so sorry
that we could not come
down for the funeral.
I mean, we really
wanted to come,
but it was so close
to the harvest,
and then we had an
irrigation leak,
and we had to bring
in a water truck
while the lines
were being fixed,
and then, out of
nowhere, a pipe burst,
and then it was this
whole back and forth thing
with the county.
I'm sorry, you don't
care about any of that,
and there's plenty of
time for that later.
Right now, I'm just
so glad you're here.
- [Jessica] I missed you too.
- Yeah.
- Well, what a pretty sight.
- Hey, Uncle Lawrence.
- My, my, my. You
certainly have grown up.
We don't even have a
picture of you in the house
from the last decade.
Get in here. Give me a hug.
- It's been a while.
- Yeah. Good to see you.
[Sam clears throat]
- Hi. I'm Sam,
Jessica's boyfriend.
- Hi, Sam. Lawrence.
How do you do?
- Hi, Sam. I'm
Jessica's aunt, Susan.
- It's a pleasure to meet
you two. I've heard a lot.
- Well, let's get inside
and get reacquainted.
- Yeah.
- I'll get those bags.
You gotta understand that
you guys got here a little bit
sooner than we expected,
but that's perfect.
You can unpack, freshen
up, and then we'll sit down
for some good, old-fashioned
country cooking.
- [Sam] Something smells good.
- [Susan] Well, make
yourself comfortable. Eat.
- [Jessica] Oh, you didn't
have to do all this for us.
- Oh, this? This was nothing.
- It doesn't smell like nothing.
It doesn't taste
like nothing either.
- I just, I'm blown away.
[Susan chuckle]
How'd you have time
to do all this?
- Oh, don't worry
about the food.
Feeding hungry souls
is the Lord's work.
- Amen, reverend.
- How was your ride here?
Any problems on the road?
- No, there was some
traffic this morning,
but smooth sailing otherwise.
- Yeah, once you get out
of them unholy cities,
things start to
look right decent.
- Don't start that again, dear.
- I'm just saying, cities, you
know, that's where crime is.
That's where the bad
stuff happens, you know?
I mean, you can look
that up. It's a fact.
- Oh, come on, Uncle Lawrence.
The city isn't all that bad.
- You put that many
people in a small space,
bad stuff is bound to happen.
Now, out here,
I've never had a raccoon
trying to steal my wallet.
- No, you put a little
puppy chow in that wallet,
I'm sure the raccoon
would be after it.
- No, ma'am.
Thievery is a man's invention,
not the Lord's intention.
- You've never seen
an animal steal?
- I'm just saying, there's
not a creature out here
that matches the wickedness
of a man's heart.
- Maybe we should just
wash up a bit first.
- Where are my manners?
You two must be exhausted.
Why don't you go, freshen
up, unpack a little,
and then we'll sit down
for a good, old-fashioned
country meal?
- Yeah, that's a great idea.
Unpack a little, have
a nice proper dinner.
- Thank you for the spread.
- Yeah, follow me. I'll show
you where you're sleeping.
Right this way.
We got y'all set up
here on the right.
Yup, here you are.
Deluxe accommodations.
Sammy will have to move
a couple of them boxes
off the bed there,
and the bathroom's just
down the hall here.
What? Y'all thought you
were gonna be sharing?
Uh-uh. You're not married.
- Technically, no, but--
- But nothing, young lady.
Y'all can sin under
your own roofs,
but this here is my home
and I don't tolerate no
hanky-panky under my roof.
This is a house of the Lord.
And you,
you ought to be
thanking my dear Susan,
'cause if it wasn't for
her standing up for you,
you'd be sleeping on the couch.
You hear me, mister?
- Yes, sir.
- And I don't want to see
this door closed neither.
Now, I'll see you
downstairs for dinner.
- Oh, he seems nice.
- I'm just glad he didn't ask
us to sleep in separate rooms.
- He might as well have.
- Mom always said they're
old school about sex.
- Seriously.
[birds chirping]
So, now that we're here, how
long do you want to stay?
- Are you ready
to leave already?
Grumpy ol' Uncle Lawrence
scared you that much?
- I'm not trying to leave,
certainly not before dinner.
I'm just curious is all.
- I don't know.
Is it weird to want to play
it by ear and see how it goes?
- Not at all.
- I just don't want them
to think we came here
just because of the money.
- I get that.
- I wanna live in
the moment for a minute.
- Of course.
[Jessica indistinctly talking]
[Sam indistinctly talking]
Do you have one of
those USB wall things?
- Maybe in the car.
[Sam sighs]
- I'll grab it later.
You feeling okay?
- I'm just a little anxious.
- It's gonna be just fine.
We can stay as long as you want,
as long as Lawrence
keeps cooking.
Give 'em the money when
you feel good about it.
- Thanks, babe.
[phone dings]
- Oh.
No cellphone service is
sketchy. I hope they have cable.
Otherwise, it's
gonna be a long trip.
- I don't know.
No distractions.
No appointments.
No football. Clean air.
[birds chirping]
The sound of the birds.
- And the bees?
[Jessica chuckles]
- Okay, later, Farmer John.
- No, no, no.
- It's time to eat.
[Sam sighs]
[loud clacking]
[country music]
[owl hooting]
[door creaks]
[Susan chuckles]
- Okay.
Here you go. Here, Jessie.
- Jessie. No one's called
me that since I was a girl.
- You're still a girl.
- I mean a kid.
- I'm sorry. It's
just old habits.
Jessica. Sorry. [chuckles]
- [Lawrence] Whoa, easy there.
We still gotta say our prayers.
- [Susan] Oh, I think
that's a wonderful idea.
- [Lawrence] Yeah. Don't be shy.
Heavenly Father, we pray to you
to thank you for this wonderful
meal we're about to eat,
this delicious food,
the gifts coming our way,
and our, and our family,
and, uh,
and, uh,
for all of the wonderful things
uh, in, in, in this life.
Um... [clears throat]
Uh, in your name, we pray. Amen.
- Amen, amen. [chuckles]
Let's eat.
- [Lawrence] Dig in.
- Oh, uh, yeah, can
I have another plate?
- Well, now, somebody is hungry.
- Actually, I'm a vegetarian.
- Oh, sh-
[Susan clears throat]
[table bangs]
Pardon my French. Um...
Well, how long have
you been a vegetarian?
- Pretty much my whole life.
- Oh, really?
- It's fine, Lawrence.
I'll just grab a new plate.
[Susan clears throat]
- Oh, no, no, no, you stay
there. You're our guests.
I'll grab one.
- I'm sorry, Jessica.
It's just, it's been so long.
- It's okay. Mom and I were
always reminding people.
- [Susan] Oh, that's right.
Right, yes, yes.
Betty was a vegetarian too.
- Vegan. Mom was vegan.
- Uh, a veg--
Oh, yes, a vegan,
[chuckles]
and why are you not?
- Well, I was for a while,
but I think I'd die if I
had to give up cheese again.
[Susan chuckles]
- Well, listen, you
do not hesitate to ask
if you need me to make
you something else, okay?
- [Jessica] Oh.
- It is not a problem.
- No, there's
salad and potatoes.
I'm perfectly fine. I promise.
- Okay.
- I guess you two have
quite a bit to catch up on.
- Well, every journey starts
with a single step, right?
[Susan chuckles]
- Well, all right.
Here you go, Jessie.
- Thank you, Uncle Lawrence.
- Yeah, and as
luck would have it,
I found something that I forgot
to remember in the kitchen.
[Susan and Lawrence chuckle]
- Have a little red
with your greens.
- [Sam] I don't imagine
y'all run into many
vegetarians around here.
- No, no.
I mean, Lawrence calls
salad rabbit food.
What I have to do
just to get a little vegetable
in his diet is astounding.
- Now, hush.
I got a whole bunch
of grapes right here.
- That's fruit, honey.
- Well, all right.
Cheers to that.
[glasses clinking]
- So, how's the farm going?
It looks great.
It's so beautiful here.
- Thank you.
You are a real sweetheart
for saying that.
Yeah. I think the
best part is the view.
Yeah, you just don't
get that in the city.
- I'll say. Out our window
is just another apartment.
- [Lawrence] Sardines in a can.
- I suppose, but it's
really not that bad
if you get to know
your neighbor,
kind of build a community,
seeing people in the office,
in the parking lot.
- [Lawrence] Yeah, I don't
need to know my neighbors.
I'm fine with my neighbors
being across the street.
I like 'em as far
away as they can be.
- Doesn't the good book
say something about
know thy neighbor?
- Well, I don't mind
knowing my neighbor
as long as they're
across the street
and behind a locked
gate, you know.
- I suppose no one's gonna
be knocking on the door
asking for sugar any time soon.
- Well, it's not that
I don't like people.
I like people just fine, but
this is my house.
This is my farm.
This is my kingdom.
If I want to make plans,
if I want to see someone,
then I'll see 'em in
town or something,
but I don't want someone
coming over here,
knocking on the door,
asking for something.
- Jessica, why don't you tell us
what you remember
about this place?
It's been so long since you
were here with your mom.
- Oh, um, not much, really.
Mom had a few photos.
so I guess that's where
the memories live.
She talked about
this place a lot,
especially towards the end.
- [Susan] I'm sorry.
I really miss her,
and, you know, really,
not a day goes by
where I'm not
thinking about her,
or you.
- Oh, thank you, Aunt Susan.
That really means a lot to me.
It's not been easy,
but it's getting a tiny
bit easier each day.
- So how long have you
two been living in sin?
- [Susan] Lawrence!
- It's just a question.
- Well, that depends, I guess.
- A while then.
- I don't think that's a topic
we need to discuss
at the dinner table.
- I completely agree.
- We're abiding by your rules
while we're in your house.
- Damn straight.
- But I think maybe we should
avoid talking about politics.
- Well--
- I think that's a
wonderful idea, hm?
Yes?
I know you two just got here
and we're just from
different walks of life,
but I would really hate for that
to get in the way of us
getting to know each other.
Right, dear?
- Yeah.
- [Susan] So, let's all eat
and then we can all get a
good night's sleep, okay?
[owl hooting]
[crickets chirping]
[door creaks]
- You asleep?
- No.
- I'm sorry that
didn't go better.
- It's okay.
Honestly, it went better
than I thought it would.
Was I out of line at dinner?
- No.
Your uncle was out of
line, and he knows it.
He's just a little
rough around the edges.
He asked if eggs were
okay for breakfast.
- I love eggs. Sounds great.
- [Sam] Says he's gonna
get them fresh for you.
- Fresh eggs?
- Well, technically he said,
"Still warm from the chicken,"
but I translated
that to mean fresh.
- Gotta love the country.
Uh, what do you
think you're doing?
- Moving the stuff off
the bed so I can crash?
- No, not over
there, you're not.
- Uncle Lawrence said--
- Well, he can have his opinion.
Doesn't mean we have
to stop being us.
Besides, we're adults.
[Jessica chuckles]
- Well, heads up, my
feet are freezing.
[Jessica giggles]
- Lucky for you,
I'll warm you right up.
[Lawrence heavily breathing]
[eerie music]
[Lawrence heavily breathing]
[Lawrence grunts softly]
[crickets chirping]
[uplifting music]
[rooster crowing]
[uplifting music continues]
[door creaks]
[Jessica cooing]
[rooster crows]
- Oh! [giggles]
- Good morning.
- Well, by the way you were
looking at them trees out there,
I didn't think you were
ever gonna come back in.
- You saw that?
- Well, just while I was
out rustling the eggs.
It's beautiful, isn't it?
- Extremely.
- Coffee?
- No, thank you.
[Sam yawns]
- [Sam] There you are.
- Oh, sorry. I took a walk.
- Sam, would you mind helping
Lawrence finish up in here
so us ladies can go
outside and catch up?
- Sure. Yeah.
- This way.
- How are your kitchen skills?
- I order a mean pizza.
- That's about what I figured.
Why don't you grab me
a cup of coffee?
- That I can do.
[Susan sighs]
- Now, about last night--
- Forget about it.
Really, it's no big deal.
It just caught me by
surprise. That's all.
- Lawrence, he is
so set in his ways.
- I promise it's fine.
- Okay. Fresh start?
One day at a time, right?
- Fresh start.
One day at a time.
- On a different note.
I want to apologize
to you and Betty
for not being there for you,
in the end and after that.
- It-- it--
- Aunt Susan--
- No, I really want to say this.
Betty and I...
[Susan sighs]
Betty and I drifted apart.
I don't think either of
us intended it to happen.
I loved her. I love her.
But, you know,
relationships take work,
and I stopped
putting in the work,
and then it just became
easier to keep our distance,
and then it started to
seem like work to rebuild,
and so that became
a wall between us,
and you're the only
family I have left,
and I don't want something
like that to keep us apart.
- I'd like that.
- It's okay.
You are always welcome here.
- Thank you.
- You always have a
place here with us.
- That sounds wonderful.
I could really use some
extra family time right now.
- Yeah.
It just goes to show you,
you never know
what's gonna happen.
- Don't you start crying too.
- Oh, God. I'm sorry.
- [Lawrence] Well, sweetie,
don't make the young lady
cry at the breakfast table.
- [Susan] I know.
I didn't mean to have
an emotional breakfast.
- Well, speaking of emotions,
I, uh...
I'm sorry about last night.
I can be a bit
adversarial sometimes.
- No need to apologize.
I could have handled that
situation a lot better.
- Really, Lawrence?
[Lawrence chuckles]
- What?
I didn't see you on
your hands and legs,
crawling around
the chicken coop,
grabbing huevos this morning.
- So, how long have you
two had the farm anyway?
[Lawrence sighs]
- Well, I couldn't
really tell you exactly.
It's been a while.
What would you say, Susan?
- [Susan] What do I say?
- [Lawrence] Yeah.
- I'd say that the days are
long but the years are short.
Now, I want to
hear about you two.
Now, how long have
you two been dating?
I mean, it must be serious
for you to drive
up here together.
- Yeah, I noticed one of you
didn't make their
bed this morning.
- Oh, Lawrence, relax a little.
I swear, the second men
retire, they get insufferable.
[Susan and Jessica chuckle]
I don't have enough work for
him and he becomes nosier
than a nun in someone
else's confession.
- You hear that, baby?
You don't get to quit working.
He's nosy enough already.
- [Sam] I am not.
- Oh, you most certainly are.
The other day, I saw him going
through our neighbor's trash.
- Ooh.
- They did not separate
their recyclables.
[Jessica and Susan chuckle]
Look, on a completely
different topic.
I heard a story the other day
about how farms are
becoming less profitable
due to water licenses.
- Oh.
- Well...
you need water for farming.
- [Sam] I think it's
mostly an issue
is what crops are
historically grown,
where coupled with the
cultural expectations of
those same communities and
the industrial processes
that have become entrenched
surrounding them.
- Oh, yeah. Mm-hm.
- [Susan] Yes, mm-hm.
- Yup.
- [Jessica] Babe, that's
really insightful.
- I mean, it's from a podcast.
I find agriculture fascinating.
- [Lawrence] Huh.
- We don't do much
farming anymore.
We're kind of retired, you know.
- I didn't figure the
two of you for retiring.
Mom said you loved
working with your hands.
- Well, I mean, you know,
it gets to the point where
you don't work
if you don't have to.
[Lawrence chuckles]
- I get that.
- Sam, now, what
do you do for work,
and how are you gonna
support our niece?
- Aunt Susan.
- Yes, give us
some little grand nieces
and nephews running around.
- I think we're getting a
little ahead of ourselves.
- Yeah. That is a far way off.
- Well, I wouldn't exactly
say that after last night.
- Really, Lawrence?
[Jessica chuckles]
[Susan sighs]
[crows cawing]
[pensive music]
- You need to stop
wandering off.
- [Jessica] I can't help it.
It's so nice to be able
to just walk around
and not worry about
anyone or anything.
- [Sam] It's nice not to hear
helicopters every night.
- [Jessica] Yeah, and
that dumpster smell.
- [Sam inhales deeply] Hm.
Well, maybe there's a little
bit of that city smell here.
- It's different.
There's supposed to be crap
on the ground out here.
- [Sam] Well, either way,
all that sex talk at
breakfast got me thinking.
- Gross. That made me
think the exact opposite!
- [Sam] Come here! Come here!
[birds chirping]
[door creaks]
- [Sam] Good news, bad news.
The bad news is
the only place that gets
any sort of cell service
is the sort of top left
corner in the living room.
- The top left?
- Yeah, by the
couch, by the window.
Well, the upside
is no distractions,
so the whole focus
is still on you.
- Is there a downside?
- Now, a downside is
there's nothing stopping
your aunt and uncle
from keeping on me
about kids and marriage.
- Everything's certainly
simpler out here.
Nothing to worry about
except what you can see.
No pressure. No bosses.
[phone buzzes]
- Oh, crap. I got a bar.
It's the clinic.
Oh, come on. Just
a little bit more.
- Go use the phone inside
if it's so important.
[Sam sighs]
[Jessica sighs]
[car rumbles]
[rock music]
- [Jessica] Hi. Can I help you?
- [Kurt] Now, who are you?
- I'm Jessica. Who are you?
- Jessica.
That's a new one.
Yeah, you must be
new to the crew.
Fresh blood is
always good, I guess.
- Oh, sorry. I don't work here.
- Yeah. No one works here.
- Perks of retirement.
- Retirement? What the
hell are you talking about?
- They're retired. They don't
work on the farm anymore.
- Hold up.
Just what do you
think this place is?
- My aunt and uncle's farm.
- Aunt and uncle?
- Yeah, I'm just visiting.
- Family.
Wow.
[Kurt scoffs]
Yeah, I never saw
that one in the cards.
So, which one of these
are you related to, huh?
- Both of them.
- By blood?
- Oh, no, my aunt.
My mom's sister.
- Julie.
- Susan.
- Who the hell is Susan?
- Hey, buddy! What
are you doing here?
- There he is.
Hey, I was just having
a real interesting conversation
with your niece over there.
- [Lawrence] Oh, are you?
Yeah, she's staying with
us for a couple days.
- [Kurt] Do not
start that with me.
- There you are. I've been
looking all over for you.
Now, come on.
- What was that about?
- You said I could lay low here.
- Yeah, I know what I said,
but I also said I needed you
to cut out your usual crap.
Give me a break.
You expect me to believe
that you bought all this stuff?
- Will you relax, pops?
Besides, when did you
have a cute little niece?
I mean, she is cute.
- All right, stop it.
Just cut it out.
I need you to listen
to me right now.
You need to leave, okay?
- Hell, I mean, I just got here.
So I guess I'm staying.
[Lawrence sighs]
- All right. Fine.
Park the car around the
side with the other ones
so you're not out here
in front like a jackass.
- Jackass.
Yes, sir.
Jackass.
[Kurt laughs]
[car roars]
[rock music]
- Jerk.
[phone dings]
- [Sam] Oh, come on.
Oh, come on.
Come on.
Almost.
[logs clatter]
Geez. Well, that was graceful.
[Sam sighs]
Oh, I didn't know these
things still exist.
[answering machine beeps]
- [Kathy] Hi, Susan.
My name is Kathy Simpson.
Well, as you know, we
read the will today,
and Betty left quite a bit
to you and your husband.
Call me back so we can
coordinate the transfer.
I wish you could have
come down for it.
- [Jessica] What are you doing?
- Huh? What?
Nothing. Not doing anything.
- Stop snooping around.
- I'm just surprised
these things still exist.
Besides, anyway,
this confirms now
there's a phone
around here somewhere.
- Who wants pie?
- Oh, pie sounds wonderful.
Sam, give the phone a rest,
okay? Come have some pie.
[Sam sighs]
- Pie sounds nice.
[birds chirping]
- Yes, it's about to get
much, much cooler, so...
- Really?
- It's a good time for
y'all to come visit.
- [Sam] Hm.
[Lawrence panting]
- [Lawrence] Ah.
I see you broke out
with the pie already.
- A little afternoon snack.
- Seriously, though. Where did
you learn to bake so well?
[Susan chuckles]
- I worked in a kitchen
up north 100 years ago.
- Up north?
- Yeah, yeah.
Practically Oregon.
- Is your friend joining us?
- Who, Kurt? No, he took off.
Yeah, he crashes with
us when he's on the outs
with whatever little filly
he's been horsing around with,
but, I'll tell ya,
he's better off alone.
- [Jessica] Well, I hope he
didn't leave because of us.
We wouldn't mind more company.
- Oh, no, trust me, no.
He's not good company
when he's like this.
- I just don't want him
stumbling back here later.
- I made it very clear.
- You better have.
- Very.
[phone dings]
- Low battery.
Excuse me. I just gotta grab
the charger out of the car.
- Jessica, would you mind
joining me for a moment?
I've got something
I want to show you.
- Sure, Aunt Susan.
[police radio
indistinctly chattering]
- [Dispatch] Hey,
Hank, we got a call
that the general store on Mill
was robbed a little while ago.
- And here I was trying
to enjoy my coffee.
Who's the closest unit?
- [Dispatch] That
would be you, boss.
- Crap.
Anybody hurt?
- [Dispatch] No, but he
sounds pretty shook up.
- All right.
I'll go check it out.
Another day.
[police siren wails]
- What?
Great.
I guess it's better
than nothing.
[car beeping]
Super.
[Sam sighs]
[ominous music]
[Sam sighs]
[rooster crowing]
[music intensifies]
- [Susan] Okay, come on. I
know it's a lot of stairs.
All right, now, I believe
it is somewhere over here.
[Susan] Oh, yes.
There it is.
Now, I remember your mother
used to pester my
mother, your grandmother,
about this all the time
when she was a little girl.
- Mom was stubborn.
- Oh, yes, she was. [chuckles]
We used to sit on the front
porch and watch the sunset
and she would say the twilight
would get caught in here
and make it sparkle forever.
I only thought of it when I
saw you on the porch earlier.
Betty loved this necklace,
and I would love
for you to have it.
See, the older you get,
the more you gotta look at
what you've done in the past
and what you're gonna
do in the future.
- What do you mean?
- Well, I guess I mean that
I don't want to look back
at this moment in a year
and have any regrets.
I can't change the fact that
I wasn't there for Betty.
That's something I'm
gonna have to live with
for the rest of my life, but...
you taking that necklace
sure does make it
a little less bad.
- [Jessica] Well, Aunt Susan,
relationships are
two-way streets.
It wasn't all your fault.
[Susan sighs]
- I guess it didn't
feel that way.
- Well, I'm right here.
I'm not going anywhere.
- Oh, look at me,
getting all emotional again.
- Oh, I get it. I felt the same.
I mean, I love my mom,
and it was so hard
seeing her like that.
- Cancer sucks.
- Cancer sucks.
- I also know what
it feels like,
to feel like you don't
have anyone to depend on.
I don't want you
to feel that way.
We're here for you,
your uncle and I,
no matter what.
- Thank you.
- Oh.
[Susan sighs]
[tense music]
- [Lawrence] Dead men
don't open doors.
- Hey, it's okay, kid.
Everything's fine now.
- It's not fine.
The store was robbed.
- But all that he got was the
money in the drawer, right?
$273.18.
Your father is not
going to beat you over
$273.18, yeah?
- Easy for you to say.
It's probably coming
out of my check.
[Hank chuckles]
- You know, if that's
the worst that happens,
it's no big deal.
- Not a big deal?
Hank, he pointed a gun at me!
- [Hank] Whoa.
Calm down.
All I'm saying is it could
have been a lot worse.
You get to go home,
safe and sound.
- I guess.
- You guess? Guess what else?
It's gonna be a pretty good
story to tell the ladies, huh?
Huh?
- Yeah, I suppose it is.
- Jessica.
Jessica!
Jessica?
[phone dial tone]
Oh, thank God.
[phone rings]
- [Dispatch] 911,
sheriff's station.
- He killed someone.
I need help.
- [Dispatch] Sir,
are you in danger?
- Yes. There's a killer here.
- [Dispatch] Okay.
It's important to remain calm.
- No, no. Calm people always
die in the podcast.
The panicked people, they
live and they get the cops!
- [Dispatch] Can you
tell me where you are?
- Yes, I'm at the farm!
- [Dispatch] The farm?
- Don't you have
GPS? It's a farm!
- [Dispatch] That's
not how it works.
- It's a farm.
It's just off the 16.
There's a lot of trees.
Old general store, a beat-up
old general store nearby.
[tense music]
[Lawrence sighs]
[metal clank]
- Hello?
Hello?
Jessica! Jessica!
[Susan chuckles]
- [Jessica] I was so
nervous coming up here.
- What were you nervous about?
- Well, I mean, we hadn't
seen each other in so long.
I didn't know if you
were a different person,
if I was a different person,
if we would get along.
I'm just so relieved
you two are still here.
- Oh, yeah. [chuckles]
We're still here.
[both chuckles]
- I've been going
to Mom's grave,
telling her about all the
gossip and the current events.
I was just scared,
you know, going on
without anyone in my life.
- Well, you have Sam.
- No, I mean, like
family, like real family.
- Well, we got you, Jessie.
Come on. [chuckles]
- Actually, I have
something to give you.
- [Sam] Jessica!
Jessica!
Oh, Jessica. Thank
God you're okay.
- Sam, what happened?
- Look, we gotta go right now.
- What are you talking about?
- No, we gotta go right now!
- Sam, you're scaring me.
- Look, it's Lawrence.
He killed that guy,
the guy in the car.
- No, no,
you got that wrong.
- How would you know?
Did you notice he didn't mention
anything about God or faith
when he came back in for pie?
That's because his brain was
too full of murder thoughts!
Look, we gotta go,
like right now!
- Okay.
- Susan, do you have
the keys to your car?
- The keys are in the kitchen.
- Look, we can take ours.
- No, no, no. The
battery's dead.
- Since when?
- We gotta go! Come on!
- [Susan] Wait up! Come on.
- Sam!
- Sam!
- Go, go, go!
Oh, God! Come on! Come on!
- What?
- Go, go!
[door thudding]
Is there any other
way out of here?
- I don't know.
- [Jessica] Baby, you're
scaring me. What is happening?
- I saw a dead body, okay?
And Lawrence was trying
to destroy the evidence
with a bottle of bleach!
- Okay, don't jump to
conclusions about my husband,
but, you know, if
Kurt did hurt someone,
then we should call the police.
- The phone's dead.
- Look, Lawrence is uncouth,
but he would never kill anybody.
- Honey, I need you
to trust me on this
before we become the opening
on next month's episode of
"Farm Towns and Body Dumps!"
- [Susan] Sam, I think you're
under a lot of stress.
- [Sam] And I think you are
far too calm right now.
- And I think you
are far too panicked.
[Susan nervously chuckles]
So let's just come back
here and calm down.
Then we can find Lawrence and
figure out what's going on.
- Sh, sh, sh, sh, sh.
- [Hank] Now, tell me again.
What happened?
- It's not much, really.
He came in, grabbed a case of
beer and a pair of sunglasses.
I thought he was
going for his wallet.
He pointed that gun at me.
I don't remember
much after that.
I must have emptied
the drawer for him.
Really, I was just
relieved that he left.
I came down here and
hid by the scratchers
until you got here.
- Damn, Ben. That sounds
all kinds of harrowing.
- You know, stuff like this
isn't supposed to
happen out here.
- Yeah, you're right.
It's crazy what's going
on in the world today.
It's not supposed to happen.
Now, listen, can you
describe him for me?
- Yeah, he had light brown hair,
and it was short on
the sides, you know?
His goatee was going
gray at the bottom.
- Yeah. It always
starts at the chin.
[Hank chuckles]
- He was thin.
He had a real angry feel about
him, like a coiled up snake.
- [Dispatch] Hank,
you out there?
- God, it never ends.
Go for Hank.
- [Dispatch] We got a call,
a potential homicide.
- Murder?
[Hank chuckles]
Are you sure it's not just
some kids playing a prank?
- [Dispatch] Not sure, but first
the robbery and then this?
Seems like an
unusually busy day.
- You can say that again.
- [Dispatch] The call dropped
before I got a location.
The caller ID'd
an old farm off the 16
near the general
store that got robbed.
Hold that thought for
a minute, Darlene, okay?
Just calm down.
I guarantee you he isn't
coming back here anymore.
- [Ben] Thanks, Hank.
- Now, work on that
story for me, all right?
Those ladies are gonna love it.
- I'll try.
- [Hank] Ha! Look at you.
All right. Thank you.
- Yeah.
- Huh.
Hey, Darlene, it sounds
like the Freeman farm to me.
I'm gonna go check it out.
Listen, you better call
the rest of the boys,
and if this thing
gets any bigger,
we could use the help.
- [Dispatch] Copy
that. I'll get on it.
[Dispatch] Oh, and,
Hank, be careful.
- [Susan] So, why don't
we all just calm down
and we can find Lawrence
and figure out what
this is all about?
- Sh, sh, sh, sh, sh.
- Sh, sh, sh, sh, sh.
I don't hear him anymore.
- [Susan] Sam, this
is ridiculous.
- Aunt Susan?
- Yeah, that's nothing.
- [Sam] He's coming.
- [Susan] Sam, wait!
- Sam!
[ears ringing]
- Damn it, Brandon.
What took you so long?
I was having trouble stalling.
- [Lawrence] Well, you
got what we need.
- [Lawrence] He knew we were
working something here.
Unless you suddenly
wanted to cut him in,
I had to make a choice.
- Oh, yeah, so you and
your quick thinking
you ruined the best dang thing
we had going.
- [Lawrence] Well, we've been
sitting around here forever.
I mean, you know, I was
getting kind of antsy.
- Oh, you were getting antsy,
so you blew the biggest
score we had in years?
You're an idiot.
- I'm not an idiot, and
we still have the score.
- [Susan] And enough bodies
for a football team,
and don't forget what we
had to do to get this place.
We've been dodging the
authorities for months.
- [Lawrence] Oh,
look who's awake.
- Oh! Hello, Jessica. Hello.
How are you?
Are you feeling good?
Okay, great, so everything's
gonna be just fine.
- Hey, Aunt Susan.
What's going on?
- Well, we know you got a
big pile of money for us,
so why don't you just
tell us where it is?
- I already told you
two we didn't bring it!
It was supposed to
be wired to you!
- Stop using that line.
We know you're full of it.
- [Sam] It's the truth!
- You keep trying to play hero,
that truth is gonna
get yourself hurt.
- [Susan] Hey, look at
me. I said look at me!
- Leave her alone!
- Hey!
Just tell me where the money
is and then we'll be gone.
We don't give a damn
about this farm.
You will never
hear from us again,
and nobody else is gonna
get hurt, so where is it?
- Where are they?
- Who?
- [Jessica] My aunt and uncle.
[Susan laughs]
- I think you're worried
about the wrong people.
- What did you do to them?
[Susan snaps]
- Brandon.
- [Lawrence] Mm-hm.
- [Susan] Do it.
- [Lawrence] Yeah.
- No! No!
- [Sam] Don't touch her!
- [Sam] Leave her alone!
[Susan chuckles]
- [Lawrence] Yeah,
these oughta work.
These are good.
- [Susan] Mm-hm.
- Simple.
- Stay with me, okay?
[Lawrence chuckles]
- Look at those man hands.
- Get off me! Get off me!
- Yeah, looks like somebody
gets himself a mani-pedi
at the old salon.
Why don't we save you some
money next time around?
- No, no, wait, wait!
- Stop!
- Stop?
- [Susan] Yeah, we got company.
- Just stay with me, okay?
Stay with me.
[tense music]
- [Lawrence] Ah, they found us.
- No, listen, we
don't know that.
Get out there and handle it.
- [Lawrence] Fine.
- And, you guys, we're gonna
play the quiet game, okay?
Or else things are gonna
get real messy in here.
Shh!
Shh!
- Howdy.
I'm looking for
Lawrence Freeman.
Do you know where
I can find him?
- At your service.
- [Hank] Mm.
There any trouble around
here recently, Mr. Freeman?
- Well, if you count
the lack of rain.
[both chuckle]
- The heat does bring
out the crazies.
- [Lawrence] Yeah.
- [Hank] The reason
I'm coming around is
we got a call from someone
saying they might need
a little assistance.
- Huh, well, it's been
quiet as a church on
Monday around here.
- Understood.
Just the same, you mind
if I take a look around?
- Oh, not at all. Be my guest.
[Sam indistinct mutter]
- I told you to be quiet,
okay? Isn't that what I said?
[Susan screams]
[Hank and Lawrence grunting]
- Jessica, run!
Get out of here!
[Susan grunts]
[Hank and Lawrence grunting]
[Lawrence panting]
[Jessica gasps]
- [Lawrence] Where you going?
[suspenseful music]
[Jessica breathing heavily]
[Jessica groans]
[Jessica whimpers]
- Where are you going
in such a hurry?
Don't you want some of this?
You couldn't just
play nice, could you?
- Don't move, Freeman.
- Sheriff.
You are tougher than you look.
- Yeah, I get that a lot.
- [Jessica] Oh, thank God.
- You all right, missy?
- [Jessica] I am now.
- I'm gonna need you
to put the weapon down.
Put your hand on your head.
- Weapon?
Oh, my farm implement.
- Best get up and get
over to the house.
- Sheriff, there's
another one in there.
[Hank groaning]
[Lawrence grunts]
[Hank groaning]
[gunshots]
[Jessica whimpering]
[Lawrence growls]
[gunshot]
[Jessica panting]
[truck door rattles]
[birds squawking]
[Jessica shakily breathing]
[Jessica shakily breathing]
[Jessica muffled whimper]
[Sam screaming]
[Sam groaning]
[Sam screaming]
[Sam screaming]
- Yeah.
I don't know why you're
doing this to yourself.
It's not like it's
your money anyway.
- It's not your money either.
- I think you're
misunderstanding your situation.
I don't care about you.
I don't care about this house.
Stop it!
The only thing I care
about is that money,
and the longer you
take to give it to me,
the more upset I get.
The more upset I get,
the more terrible things
I'm gonna do to you.
- Where's Jessica?
[Susan chuckles]
- Playing outside with Brandon.
- If you hurt her...
If you would just give me
the money, then we could go!
- [Sam groans] - [Susan] Huh?
Stop that.
Stop it.
- What is with all the noise?
- [Susan] You're
complaining about this?
I'm hearing gunshots out there.
- [Sam] Let me go!
Did you hurt her?
- Nah, Chipmunk's fine. You
that's in a world of hurt.
- Yeah, he seems to think
there's something chivalrous
about keeping the money from us.
- Oh, that's stupid.
- Screw you!
If I give you the
money, you'll kill us.
- [chuckles] You watch
too many movies.
You give us the
money, we disappear,
or you can not
give us the money,
we beat you very badly,
and then we disappear.
I mean, that seems like
an easy choice to me.
[ominous music]
[Jessica breathes shakily]
[flies buzzing]
[flies buzzing]
[Jessica muffled yelp]
[Jessica gasping]
[Jessica sobs]
[Jessica panting]
- Aunt Susan.
[Jessica crying softly]
- Just let me go.
Just let me go.
- Would you just be quiet?
- [Lawrence] Okay.
- [Susan] No.
- [Lawrence] Shall we begin?
[Lawrence sighs]
Let's have a little
conversation, shall we?
Samuel Richards.
[Lawrence chuckles]
I bet money that you'd be
one of those candy-asses
that went by Sammy or something,
but, my baby, she had you
pegged as a Sam from the get.
That's why she's the
brains of the operation.
I'm just the good looks.
So, let's see here.
You graduated in 2016.
You're a registered nurse.
Wow, congratulations.
That is impressive, Samuel.
And look at this.
Here's the answer to the
million-dollar question.
You've been dating
for a year and a half.
Hm.
Couldn't even share that
with us at the dinner table.
All right.
Mom, dad, brothers.
Okay, so your whole
family lives in San Diego.
You have a cat named Montgomery.
What is it with kids these days?
- All right, come on, baby.
Come on. Stay on task.
- [Sam] No, no, no.
- [Lawrence] Alright.
So...
here's how it goes.
I'm gonna ask you
a series of questions.
For every question you
answer incorrectly,
you will lose a finger,
and when you run out of
fingers, things will get nasty.
- Please don't.
Please don't, no.
No, no!
[Jessica whimpers
and breathes shakily]
[Sam whimpering]
[Sam breathes shakily]
- It's here. It's here.
The cashier's check
is in Jessica's bag.
- Sam, that wasn't
so hard now, was it?
- Yes.
[Lawrence laughs]
[chickens clucking]
[wolf howing]
- All right.
- Yes.
- Oh, shoot.
Little Miss Emotional is
going for the cruiser.
- I'll get her.
- No, Brandon, just leave her.
We can take the check and
we could be outta here.
- Oh, to hell with the check.
I'm gonna go stick
that chipmunk.
- Damn it!
[ominous music]
[keys clattering]
- Car trouble?
[Jessica screams]
- Screw you!
- Oh, with pleasure.
- Where is it?
Oh, God. Okay.
- Why are you doing this, huh?
I know that you killed
my aunt and uncle.
For what? For some
dumb inheritance money?
- Oh, they were dead
long before we knew about
the inheritance money.
We needed a place to lay
low and we found this house.
Nice and secluded,
off the main road.
A couple of people who
didn't have many friends.
The inheritance money,
well, that was just...
that was just a happy accident.
- A happy accident?
You're monsters!
- It's not my fault
the youngsters
don't check in on their
elders anymore these days.
[Sam grunting]
- Come on. Come on.
[Sam grunting]
[Sam grunting]
[Susan chuckles]
- I'm gonna make
you a deal, Sammy, okay?
I don't want to kill you.
I mean, more bodies,
more problems, honestly,
so I'm just gonna leave
you tied to this chair.
I figure it's gonna
take the police
like four or five
hours to get here,
and then, when they come in,
I want you to just have amnesia
about my appearance, okay?
- Deal?
- What's the point?
Even if you don't
want to kill me,
do you think Lawrence
is gonna let me live?
- I'm about to go grab him
and we're gonna hop in the car
and we're gonna be
like dust in the wind,
or I could just take
care of this right now.
- [Sam] No, no, Jessica
won't go along with it.
- Why don't you forget
about her for a second?
- Where is she?
- She is being
tended to by Brandon.
- What do you mean?
- It means that I need you
to make a choice right now!
- Jessica!
- Oh!
Wrong choice.
- [Lawrence] So, what's
the plan, sweetheart?
Are you gonna stay
in the car all night?
Why don't we just
get this over with?
I promise I'll be quick.
- Screw you!
- Ooh, still feisty, I see.
I like that.
This oughta be fun.
- [Dispatch] Come in,
sheriff. You out there?
- Help, help! - [Dispatch]
Hank, you out there?
- [Jessica] Please,
please, please!
- Someone help me!
- [Dispatch] Hank?
- Someone please help me!
[radio whirs]
No, help. No, no,
no, no, no. [crying]
What's fricking happening?
[Lawrence grunts]
[glass clatters]
[Jessica screams]
[Lawrence grunting]
- [Lawrence] You
know you love me.
[Lawrence grunts]
- You two, you couldn't do
it the easy way, could you?
You just couldn't
eat and get out.
- You gonna shoot me, hm?
- If I wanted to shoot
you, I already would have.
- Then what are we doing here?
- Well, I'm gonna
take the money and go.
I don't care what you do.
[Susan chuckles]
[gunshot]
[Sam grunts]
[ears ringing]
You little idiot.
I was gonna let you live, huh?
[gunshot]
[Susan laughs]
Come out.
[gunshot]
[ominous music]
[gunshots]
- You're running out of bullets,
Suze, if that's your name!
They're gonna find you.
- Oh, Sammy boy.
[gunshot]
Why don't you stay back there
and think about
what you've done?
[gunshot]
[door creaks]
- Jessica.
[hinges creaking]
[Jessica shakily breathing]
[Jessica softly sobbing]
[Jessica softly sobbing]
[Jessica sobbing]
- Knock, knock.
- Jessica. Jessica.
- [Jessica] Don't come near me.
- Why? What are
you gonna do to me?
- Don't try me.
- That's all I want to do.
You know, I really
oughta thank you.
You are just so much more
fun than your aunt was.
- You're an evil pig.
- Is that supposed
to hurt my feelings?
- You killed an innocent
couple who did nothing.
It was the only family I had
left. You have no feelings.
- Oh, but I do.
Come here. Let me show you.
[Jessica whimpering]
[Jessica gasping]
[heartbeats]
[Jessica gasping]
[Lawrence grunts]
[wood splintering]
[Lawrence grunting]
[Lawrence gasping]
[Lawrence choking]
[bone snapping]
[Jessica shakily breathing]
[footsteps]
[Sam breathing heavily]
- What's with the scotch?
- It's, you know,
for whacking stuff.
Oh my God. I thought
you were dead.
- Thanks for not
giving up on me.
- Never.
[emotional music]
[police sirens wailing]
[police radio chatters]
[rooster crowing]
Looks like help
is finally coming.
- I'm not sure what
there's left to help with.
- Well, maybe they caught Susan,
or whoever she was.
- Maybe.
- You're sure about your
aunt and your uncle?
- They're gone.
- I'm sorry, babe.
- It's okay.
I don't think I have any
tears left to cry today.
- You sure you're okay?
- I will be.
- I love you.
- I love you too.
[sirens distantly wailing]
- Um... [chuckles]
How long do you
think it's gonna take
to figure out what
actually happened here?
- I imagine this place will
be a crime scene for a while.
- So much for the farm.
- You disappointed?
- Absolutely not.
You?
- I think we're
definitely gonna end up
on a podcast about this.
[Jesssica sighs]
[police sirens wailing]
[ominous music]
[police radio chattering]
- [Policeman 1] Copy 22,
this is 10-6 on 187.
- [Policeman 2] 22, be advised
your 10-15 came back wanted
in multiple states
under multiple aliases.
- [Policeman 1] 22, copy.
Any additional information
you can provide?
- [Policeman 2] 22, it appears
she's wanted out of Idaho
on multiple murders.
Oregon on attempted kidnapping,
and California on
identity theft. Copy.
- [Policeman 1] 22, copy.
I need code 8, additional units.
- [Policeman 2] 10-4.