Coogan's Bluff (1968) Movie Script
It is urgent... repeat: urgent...
that you give the sheriff a call.
I say again, Coogan,
call the sheriff.
It is urgent... repeat: urgent...
that you call the sheriff...
Put your pants on, Chief.
Mm... Coogan.
Mm-hm.
- He still in Phoenix?
- Mm-hm.
- Expecting anyone else?
- Mm-mm.
What the hell's that?
Oh. Prisoner.
- Uh-huh? What'd he do?
- Just killed a woman.
Just his wife, that's all.
Uh-uh.
How long you been trackin' him?
Three days.
You need a bath.
- After.
- Now.
- Now?
- Uh-huh.
Hm.
Stop!
What the hell for?
Back it up!
Go on in!
- Need a bigger target?
- There ain't none in this county, baby.
When I assign a deputy to a roadblock, I
expect him to be there when I come back.
- Mornin', Sheriff.
- Millie.
Ever cross your mind I might
accidentally know what I'm doin'?
You mind handin' me the soap?
Direct disobedience to orders, dereliction
of duty, leaving an assigned post.
Those are the first
three I think of.
- The fugitive's on the porch.
- I saw him. That's just one thing more.
Get my back, will you?
That's a prisoner out there. Not
an animal to be tethered to a rail.
- My shirt's in there on the bed.
- For what?
- The badge on it comes right off.
- You wanna play the lonesome boy, fine!
You'll get a gutful. Every lousy
one-man job that comes along.
- Got one waiting for you right now.
- That so?
Be in front of my desk in one hour.
Don't bother to stand up and salute.
One hour!
Texas?
Arizona.
My home town.
- Business trip?
- You might call it that.
- Rancher?
- Deputy sheriff.
- Is that right? May I ask what you're...
- Extraditing a fugitive.
One of your cowboys step
outta line in our fair city?
No. One of your boys
stepped outta line in ours.
Head of the line, cowboy.
- That's luggage.
- What?
- That thing in your hand, that's luggage.
- So, it's luggage.
So it's 50 cents extra
for a piece of luggage.
Where to, cowboy?
177 East 104th Street.
- You from Texas?
- Arizona.
- You with the rodeo?
- Nope.
Everybody wear them
clothes in Arizona?
No. Lifeguards wear swim trunks.
Nurses wear white dresses.
What do they wear here?
That's $2.95,
including the luggage.
Tell me, how many stores are there
named Bloomingdale's in this town?
- One. Why?
- We passed it twice.
It's still $2.95
including the luggage.
Yeah.
Well, there's three dollars,
including the tip.
Oh, sure, you want him arrested.
What's gonna happen when we get
him downtown? I'll tell ya what.
You'll say it was a big mistake and swear
you fell downstairs, just like last time.
But when he's arrested,
I feel sorry.
Look, Mrs Amador...
- You want something?
- Deputy Coogan.
- Is that the whole thing?
- I'm looking for a Lieutenant McElroy.
Up the stairs.
Now, look. Mrs Amador, why
don't you just divorce the bum?
- I cannot do that!
- You got to!
How can I divorce?
We're not married.
Up there, stickin' yourself
in the arm with that poison?
Soliciting what?
Look, Officer, when a lady can't
adjust her stockings, the world's...
Hey, Slim!
Sir, Third Avenue's a public street.
We've got as much right to as anybody...
- Get "her."
- Look at all that, in two-inch heels!
Do you work out? Do you?
Come in!
We got no chance
of getting a conviction.
- I got a confession!
- Be right with you.
Look, do you read?
Do you take a morning paper?
There's such a thing as a supreme court.
Did you ever hear of it?
You can be damn sure
DiBlasio's lawyer has.
- What's your problem?
- My name's Coogan.
So?
You got a James Ringerman here
you're holding for me?
Oh, yeah. Deputy sheriff,
Texas, right?
- Arizona. I have the papers for him here.
- I'm sure you do. Leave your number...
- Should I spring DiBlasio?
- No, hold him...
Lieutenant McElroy here.
No. Hold him until I check with
the district attorney's office.
- You got it?
- Yes.
What number?
Your phone number,
hotel where you're staying.
- I'm not staying anyplace.
- Well, find yourself a place.
- Ringerman's not ready.
- Oh? Why not?
He took a little trip.
Look, I understood that you were
holding him in custody here for me.
An LSD trip. He's in the
prison ward at Bellevue.
In jail?
- Do you want a written report?
- Without the search.
Yes, sir.
How did he get this LSD in jail?
We serve it every day like
peanuts at the cocktail hour.
Lieutenant McElroy.
No.
- Because I said no, that's all.
- Uh... Lieutenant...
I want everybody to feel free to just
come bustin' in here night and day.
- It's Mrs Fowler.
- Oh, yeah.
- I wanted to talk to you.
- Look, Lieutenant...
You can't make out a rape
complaint and then just take off.
We've got an APB out for that guy.
The streets aren't
safe in this town.
Uh... Fowler. That's it. Fowler.
- When does he get out of the hospital?
- Hm? Who?
- Ringerman! Who are we talkin' about?
- When the doctor says he can get out.
- Take a few days, see the town.
- I've already seen the town.
You like orange juice? You'll love
Broadway. Ask anybody where it is.
You made another rape
complaint four months ago.
"Attempted" rape.
And I sent a detective up
to talk to you at the time.
"He" tried to rape me, too.
Did "I" ever try to rape you?
- Get her outta here!
- Lady, you need a psychiatrist.
I went to one and he
tried to rape me, too.
Out, out!
You still here?
Look, Lieutenant. Suppose, um...
Suppose I sign a receipt for the prisoner.
Then he'd be my responsibility, right?
Look, Tex, the only way you'll ever
lay your hands on James Ringerman
is if a New York State judge
renders him into your custody.
You can't think about that
until he's released from Bellevue.
- When will that be?
- A week, a month?
How the hell do I know?
I'm no doctor.
Lieutenant McElroy.
Don't call us, we'll call you.
Huh? Yeah. I got it
right here on my desk.
Sorry I'm late. I'm Julie Roth,
your sister's probation officer.
- How come you never been to the place?
- I've been there lots. You're never home.
Come up some night,
I'll show you the roof.
I've seen a roof.
Hey, that I like.
You know somethin'?
You're pretty good-looking for a cop.
Thank you.
Next you're gonna ask me if I make it
with all the good-looking fuzz here.
Well, the answer is no,
not all of them.
Nothing you say or do will shock or
upset me, so let's cut out the nonsense.
What do you know!
I can feel your heart.
OK, Joe, you've shown me.
Wow, feel that thing beat.
Joe, will you please keep
your hands to yourself.
Tick, tick, tick.
Guess you didn't hear the lady,
did you, boy?
Cool it, cowboy. There's plenty
here for both of us, huh?
Tick, tick, tick.
What the hell do you think you're
doing? And who are you, anyway?
- I'm a cop, lady, just like you are.
- I don't happen to be a cop.
- Are you all right, Joe?
- Yeah.
Let me see.
Look, I'm a stranger in town, ma'am. I'm
not from Texas. Arizona. I just thought...
There was no need for violence.
Well, yeah. I can see that now.
I'm sorry about that.
- I think you should apologise.
- OK, ma'am, I apologise.
- Not to me! To him!
- Now, wait just a minute.
No, I don't want no apologies.
Just keep that creep
away from me, huh?
Joe...
Joe! Joe!
Thanks.
Do you know how long
it's taken me to find that boy?
- I'll be glad to go get him for you.
- No.
- I'll be glad to bring him back, really.
- By the scruff of the neck?
And we wonder why
these kids hate cops.
Found something about New York
you like, Tex?
He just calls me that.
Really my name is Coogan.
If I fouled things up for you,
I'm sorry.
- I just thought...
- Did you? Think?
Well, yeah. I just...
We don't treat people like that
in New York, Mr Coogan.
- How do you treat 'em?
- I doubt it'd interest you.
- Try me.
- It's a long story.
I just happen to have some time.
Here.
Maybe you know a nice little place
we can have lunch and talk about it.
Sorry, Mr Coogan.
You're not my type.
How can you tell?
- The hat, maybe.
- Oh, that? That comes right off.
Are you dense, or just stubborn?
Hungry mostly.
Come on.
You know, I'm always interested
in new techniques.
Psychophysiological, hm?
It's a branch of psychology
that deals with
the fundamental relationships
between mind and body.
So it's psychophysiological
autogenesis.
Alphagenics for short.
- Alphagenic?
- Mm.
I've been experimenting
with it up at my place...
- You live near here?
- Not far.
You do this experiment
at your house, hm?
Oh, yes, it's much better there. It's
warm and informal. At the precinct...
Seems like an interesting setup.
In fact...
Thank you.
- What do you want?
- Your check, sir.
- Yeah, I saw it.
- Oh, it is getting late.
Why don't you just run along, huh?
- Yes, sir.
- Waiter, just a minute.
It's after three.
I have to be going.
- What are you doin'?
- Dutch.
- You're the girl, aren't you?
- There have been rumours to that effect.
Well, you just sit back
and act like one.
How?
Take everything you can get,
that's how.
Is that the way the
girls act in Arizona?
That's the way everybody
acts everywhere.
You too?
- Especially me.
- Thank you.
You're welcome.
Thank you.
You're welcome.
- Uh... I'll take my bag.
- That's all right. I'll carry it.
- But I have to go now.
- Fine. Where to?
You don't understand.
I have a dozen things to do.
- Good. I'll help you.
- But I'll be all day and half the night.
I've got nothing but time.
I wouldn't get too
comfortable, Mr Coogan.
Nobody calls me "Mr"
with my boots off.
I don't know your first name.
How about just Coogan,
without the "Mr"?
Julie.
I don't remember telling you mine.
Yeah, well,
that's my police trainin'.
Po-lice trainin'?
Yeah.
See, it's on your magazines here.
Name and address
of the subscription.
How are you?
I thought you wanted
to learn about alphagenics.
Oh, I do. I do.
Good.
My files.
I only handle young,
single girls.
Yeah.
Me too.
Now, briefly...
autogenesis is basically
a programme of...
self-regeneration,
- the main point of attack being the...
- What?
core of self-contempt
that is always a principal factor.
This we do by means...
of a tape recorder,
which is right here.
The programme is based on behavioural
psychological principles,
the position being that all
human and animal response...
is the result of...
conditioned reflex...
which, as you know, is simply
a particular bodily response...
to a particular...
stimulus.
- Phone.
- Forget it.
Hello?
Yes, this is she. Who?
Laura!
It's one of my girls.
Yes?
Oh, not him again.
Now, you know that the terms of your
probation specifically stated that...
Well, of course it's difficult.
I understand that
better than you think.
Well, yes, he's...
You can always say no,
can't you?
No.
All right. Fine.
I'll expect you in five minutes.
Five minutes.
Yeah.
Five minutes.
- Yeah?
- Single.
How long you gonna be staying?
No longer than I can help it.
All right. Room 304.
That'll be $7, in advance.
- The sign says five.
- Seven without luggage.
That ain't luggage.
A cab driver in this town'd
give you an argument.
- Do you want the room or not?
- No, no, I'll take it.
Excuse me, sir.
After you, sir.
- You really hit the jackpot tonight, sir.
- Yeah.
Fell right into it and came up
with a rose in your nose.
A lonesome lady
just down the hall.
I think she was stood
up on a date tonight.
And beautiful.
I mean, all the tools.
So long.
No trouble to give a
knock on the door.
So long, buddy.
Hi.
Help a lady in distress?
Wrong room.
I'm a girl who never had trouble
with a zipper in her life...
until tonight.
Be an angel man.
Up or down?
Well, let's put it this way, sport:
you're drivin'.
Out.
What's the matter?
- Are you some kind of religious fanatic?
- Come on, out.
All right, you cheap bum.
Who needs your lousy action?
Hold on a minute.
Texas faggot!
You Texas boys get up early.
It's Arizona.
And I figured I'd better get here
before the cuckoos start gatherin'.
What do you want?
Ringerman... now.
You've got a problem.
You don't listen.
Number one.
First you go down to the
district attorney's office
where they check your papers.
The affidavit of flight, request
for extradition, and so forth.
Number two.
Then you go down to the Supreme
Court of the State of New York,
where Judge Acosta renders
the fugitive into your custody.
But you can't do anything
until they release Ringerman from
the prison ward at Bellevue. OK?
- You could get him.
- I'm a busy man.
You could walk right in
and get him for me.
Tex, you're getting on my nerves. What
gives with you people? Too much sun?
Let's make it simple. Get outta my office
and don't come back until I send for you.
Coogan.
Piute County Sheriff's Office.
Lieutenant McElroy sent me up here
to pick up a James Ringerman.
Ringerman?
Yeah. Said he'd appreciate it
if you'd snap it up a little.
He's parked in the ambulance zone.
The man said he can only stay a second.
If you'd be kind enough
to open this one.
No, not without a medical release.
I understood that medical release
went through last night.
Not listed here.
It probably hasn't reached
this department yet.
If you'll open up here, I can straighten
it out with the doctor right away.
I can't let you through.
He's already got one visitor.
Oh?
- That's it, huh?
- That's it.
What's your name, Officer?
- What for?
- Well, when somebody asks me
why Judge Acosta of the New York State
Supreme Court's been kept waiting,
I gotta give 'em a name.
- Yeah. Now, just a minute...
- Do I get the name
or do I have to have Lieutenant
McElroy come and get it for me?
Just a second!
Everybody tells me
somethin' different.
Rudy!
Take him in to see Ringerman.
You'll call the doc, huh?
Call the doc.
Well, looky, looky, looky!
And they say the West
ain't wild any more!
Hey, if it ain't Hoot Gibson!
Give me a home
where the buffalo roam
And the deer and
the antelope play
Well, well, looky here.
Coogan.
Hey, Linny, say hello to the
fuzz that busted me in Arizona.
Yeah. Man-burger.
Did you come to take
me back, cowboy? Huh?
This cat's got wild vibes.
Hey, man, she's pickin' up
on your vibrations.
You wanna know the thing about me?
I got this little
green worm in my head.
And it glows in the dark.
That's the thing about me.
- I'm Coogan.
- Yes, Rollins told me.
Apparently there's been a mix-up.
- Can he travel?
- How soon were you planning to leave?
I was trying to make a helicopter
in 45 minutes at Pan Am.
- I'd hate to miss that connection.
- Yes, I understand, but...
there's always danger of residual
psychotic reaction to LSD.
He can be trouble.
So can I.
- You travelling alone?
- Just one of him and one of me.
All right, I'll release him.
Put your clothes on, Ringerman.
You're going on another trip.
Give Pushie my regards, huh?
OK?
- OK.
- Yeah.
Does more for me
than a kilo of grass, huh?
Put your pants on, boy.
Will all passengers kindly
proceed to the boarding area. Thank you.
Call for passenger Coogan
on housephone 1G.
- Where are the housephones?
- Back there, sir.
- Coogan here.
- Wrong number.
- Yeah, crazy baby.
- Kill him, Jimmy. Kill him, Jimmy.
Not here! Let's blow!
Green pants, hm?
Green corduroy.
Had a red sweater.
He had a face?
I told you, he was behind me.
Beautiful.
Look, I was on my back
and that's all I saw.
All right. From the top,
let's start again.
From where you bluffed your way
into Ringerman's hospital room.
I haven't left anything out.
- Thing is, I don't know that for sure.
- I told you.
Come back in the morning.
The patient's in need of rest.
- Just a couple more minutes, Doctor.
- All right.
Look, yesterday we had
a prisoner in custody.
Today we've got a fugitive wandering
around with your gun in his pocket.
- Think about it.
- I have been.
We need your cooperation.
What you remember on the plane home
won't help us get Ringerman right now.
I'm not leaving
without that prisoner.
Didn't that whack on the head
teach you anything?
You're in a whole... another kind of
ball game. You're out of your league.
We've got 28,000 cops in the city.
Leave Ringerman to us.
Well, it's gettin' personal now.
Yeah, a man's gotta do
what a man's gotta do.
That it, Wyatt?
That's one way of puttin' it,
Lieutenant.
Well, here's another: forget it.
Understand? That's
not just me talking.
This is from the district
attorney's office.
You are not a policeman in the city
of New York. Am I getting through?
- I still carry a badge.
- In Arizona you're a deputy sheriff!
Here you're just another private
citizen... with a headache.
- I'll be back tomorrow.
- Yeah, you do that.
What do you want?
- Ringerman?
- There's no such person here.
- Police. Open up.
- I gotta see a warrant.
All right!
Will ya wait a minute?!
Upstairs, 25.
Outta the way.
Yeah?
Oh, yeah?
So it's the cops.
Well, let 'em come.
Well, well, well!
What have we got here?
Buffalo Bill with the fancy hat!
And look!
Boots with the pointy toes.
Very fancy.
I'm not impressed.
You Mrs Ringerman?
Come in. Come in, Mr Cowboy.
I got nothin' to hide. I'm not
even asking for a search warrant
cos I got nothin' whatsoever
to hide from nobody.
Welcome to my palace.
Course, the prince just
happens to be out,
but that's cos the police
are just hounding him.
Well, you're very polite,
with your fancy hat in your hand.
At least you know how
to enter a lady's home, anyway.
Where is he, Mrs Ringerman?
You outta your head? I should tell
you so you take him back to jail?
You're talkin' to his mother.
Let me show you somethin'.
Just look what I got in here.
Look at this.
Genuine sterling
silver dinnerware.
My son gave it to me.
And look at this.
Hand-painted imported oil painting.
Gifts! Gifts from a
son to his mother.
And look.
How many mothers do you know...
Just look at this.
A fur coat he got for me.
- How?
- How? He went to the store.
Was it open for business?
You try to be nice.
So what do you get?
Fancy remarks.
Maybe you've been here
long enough, Mr Cowboy.
Look, Mrs Ringerman, I just
wanna take him back for trial.
Oh, yeah?
I don't usually make
no deals with cops.
Be smart if you did.
Smart? Smartness is one thing.
Motherhood's another.
Motherhood?
That's what you're talkin' to,
Mr Cowboy: motherhood.
- He does all right, doesn't he?
- 24 hours, the phone never stops.
- A nice motorcycle.
- Bought and paid for with his own money.
You wanna see his owner's licence?
No.
- Pretty.
- Yeah. Linny Raven. That's her name.
A certified ding-dong.
Raven, huh?
OK, Mrs Ringerman.
Thank you for the visit.
Is that all?
Hey, wait a minute! You think you
can come in here, write down a name
and put on that fancy
hat and just go?
You know what you are?
Fancy.
You smart-ass cowboy cop!
I hope you break both legs!
- What's goin' on here?
- You're under arrest.
- What's the charge?
- Impersonating an officer.
I wake up stinkin' like a goat.
No bath.
Couldn't even take a shave.
Cockroaches.
- And now because of you, for what?
- You've met Sergeant Wallace.
Do you know what it means when
you've got a stakeout established
and some rockhead walks in
and blows it... Oh, damn!
Where do you come off, anyway?
This isn't the OK
Corral around here.
This is the city of New York!
We've got a system!
Not much, but we're fond of it.
We don't like it when a two-for-a-nickel
cowboy tries to bend it out of shape.
Are you chargin' me or what?
You blew a stakeout!
It involved a lot of time and trouble
and discomfort for Sergeant Wallace.
You thought Ringerman'd go there?
- It has happened.
- Not with him it wouldn't.
Where does it say you're
an expert on Ringerman?
I tracked him down for eight days. You
learn a lot about a person hunting him.
- Like what?
- Like that he's not a fool, that's what.
Then how in the hell
did "you" collar him?
If you'd asked us about Mrs Ringerman,
we'd have told you she's a nut!
There's no point in
going up there to see her.
I wanted her out so I
could look the place over.
- She wasn't going anyplace.
- There's a good chance she would have.
Why?
The same way an animal leaves a nest
in another direction... to throw you off.
Well, what do you know!
Woodcraft!
It's the one merit badge I missed.
That's too bad.
You might have learned something.
About what?
About animals. People. They don't act
much different when you're hunting 'em.
Hold it.
This came for you.
Which makes it unanimous.
I took the liberty.
You're on flight number 73, TWA.
Leaves at 4.15pm.
They'd like you there
a half-hour earlier.
I'll think about that.
Coogan.
I'm through messin'
around with you.
Obstructing justice is a
one-to-five felony. Forget Ringerman.
If I even suspect you're nosin'
around between now and plane time,
I'll throw you in the can so fast,
it'll make your nose bleed!
- What happened in there?
- Nothin' much.
Didn't you get taken off
the Ringerman case?
News travels fast
around here, doesn't it?
I was in the room
when McElroy called Arizona.
Yeah, old Sheriff McCrea must have
really enjoyed that phone call.
He doesn't like you?
Oh, he likes me some of the time.
- Most of the time not.
- Why?
He looks at me, he sees a man
who's gonna take his job some day.
I believe it.
There's the Cloisters.
Would you like to go through it?
"No, thank you, Julie.
Some other time."
I'm trying to picture
it the way it was.
Just the trees and the river, before
people came along and fouled it all up.
Thinking "He's out there
somewhere"... Ringerman, your prey?
- Right.
- Mm-hm.
Can I tell you something else?
McElroy wasn't just kidding.
He said he'd throw you in jail
and he meant it.
Well, he's just trying to protect you.
Can't you see that?
That's Ringerman's home court out there
and you don't even know the rules.
So...
do yourself a favour and...
stop thinking about him.
- I wasn't.
- Oh? What, then?
Worms.
Little green kind of ones
that glow in the dark.
- Green worms?
- Yeah. Green.
You are so enigmatic.
Enig... what?
It's a word that
keeps coming to mind.
Except it's a phoney.
It is, huh?
There has to be something
more to you besides...
What?
I dunno. Love. Compassion.
Humanity. Capacity for pity.
- Pity?
- Mm. You must have heard of it.
Yeah. What colour is it?
It's no colour!
See? You don't know
what you're talkin' about.
I don't know what "you're"
talking about, that's for sure.
Well, the colour of pity is red.
- Really? Hm.
- Oh, I've seen some once.
- Where?
- It doesn't make any difference.
Oh, I give up on you.
I'm looking for a key.
Lots of luck.
I can't even find the door.
Well...
It was a bus station
in Prescott, Arizona.
It was all over the floor, pity.
This guy felt sorry for a
prisoner he was takin' in.
He let him say
goodbye to his wife.
He ended up with
a six-inch blade in his gut.
The wife had it up her sleeve.
So much for pity.
Who was it?
Aren't we gonna have a spaghetti
dinner, or was that just talk?
It was you, wasn't it?
I'm really ready for spaghetti.
OK. And thank you.
For what?
Just... thank you.
I'll say this. Once you find
a subject that interests you,
you certainly keep after it.
Why not?
I think we better
change the subject.
All righty.
Do you know a girl
named Linny Raven?
Yes, I'm her probation
officer. Why?
I'm just curious, that's all.
That's privileged information,
Coogan. You know that.
You were the one who
wanted to change the subject.
Tell me about Arizona.
Why don't you come
see for yourself?
- Is that an invitation?
- Now, what's it sound like?
Here, I'll give you a hand.
- I just got a picture of that.
- What?
Me galloping up to the old
corral with my sleeping bag.
You might be surprised.
Hm?
At what?
At Arizona.
It's part of the Union now.
- Thank you.
- You're welcome.
Electricity, indoor plumbing, TV...
all that.
You wouldn't even have to bring a
sleeping bag. I got all the conveniences.
And girls?
Yeah, you might see a stray
one of those floatin' around.
I mean you. Girlfriends.
I never took a census. Why?
I don't know. I just judged you
to be rather busy in that area.
- You did?
- Mm.
- How about you with men?
- I don't need a census. I can count them.
You can?
How did we get back
on this subject?
It wasn't easy. Just fate.
- I think you may be right.
- Usually am.
- Are you?
- Mm-hm.
Dinner.
Still running?
A good spaghetti sauce should
simmer for about three hours.
Mmm.
Mm.
You know, if you have one decent
spark in your whole body, you'd...
Coogan?
I say love is a
pigeon-toed orange peel
Pigeon-toed orange peel
No more, no less
A pigeon-toed orange peel
Pigeon-toed orange peel
And it's real, love is real
Pigeon-toed orange peel
No more, no less
Pigeon-toed orange peel
And it's real, love is real
I say love is a
pigeon-toed orange peel
A pigeon-toed orange peel
No more, no less
A pigeon-toed orange peel
Hey, Groovy! Groovy!
Hey, Groovy! You in the hat!
Hey, hey, big man!
Ooooh!
Ooh, looking for anyone special?
Linny Raven. Is she around?
If you're willing to
settle for second best.
Nirvana City, back room.
I say love is a
pigeon-toed orange peel
A pigeon-toed orange peel
No more, no less
A pigeon-toed orange peel
Pigeon-toed orange peel
And it's real, love is real
Are you lookin' straight at me
to see a sign of love?
Are you lookin' straight at me
to hear a line of love?
Are you reachin' out to me
to see if lovin' has a feel?
Do you know the answer to
the question "Is love real?"
I say love is a
pigeon-toed orange peel...
There you go, baby.
- Linny.
- Who is your friend?
This is Wonderful Digby
and this is Omega.
I'm Coogan. Been lookin' for you.
Yeah, wild.
But we were just about to split.
Um...
- I wanna talk to you.
- Hey, Charlie.
Coogan.
Coogan.
112 Ellwood Street.
Way up on the top.
Yeah, I was already up there.
They told me you were down here.
Well, try again.
And wear your boots, cowboy.
- I'm wearin' 'em right now.
- So you are.
Hey, Charlie.
- It's still Coogan.
- It's Charlie.
As in "Goodbye, Charlie."
As in "Ladybug, ladybug,
fly away home."
Look, friends. We wanna be alone.
- Uh-uh. Go away, Charlie.
- Yeah, while your legs still work.
All right, now. I don't like violence,
Mr Wonderful... whatever your name is.
You better drop that blade or you
won't believe what happens next,
even while it's happenin'.
The blade.
It's dropped.
Would you have?
Would I have what?
With the broken bottle?
Gouged him?
Hm?
I don't know. That was up to him.
Good heavens!
How's everything in Australia?
What do you want? Hm?
Cat got your tongue?
No.
Joe Straight.
What's your bag, Joe?
Music? Hm?
No?
Grass, hm?
Dig grass? Hm?
Juice. Hm?
A drinking man.
Occasionally.
Why me, Mr Cowboy?
Cos I liked what
I saw in the hospital.
So did I.
It's what happened afterwards
that I didn't care for too much.
What are you talking about?
Something about getting sapped on
the head has a weird effect on me.
- What's sapped?
- You know.
Mm-mm.
Liar.
- I'd never lie to cowboys.
- You wouldn't, huh?
Do me a favour.
Tell me where Ringerman is.
I just wanna talk to him.
- You want Jimmy?
- Mm-hm.
I know where he is.
Later.
Come on, shoot.
You gonna take all night?
Ha-ha! Great shot!
He's looking for Jimmy Ringerman.
Pushie. He hasn't got a gun.
Looking for Jimbo, eh?
Yeah.
You lost?
Shouldn't leave your horse, cowboy.
Cool it, cool it.
Come on, come on.
Let's get out of here.
Where's Ringerman?
You bastard.
Have you any idea
of the damage you've done?
I'm talking about Linny Raven.
I just got her out of jail.
She was picked up near that pool room.
Do you know what that means?
Violation of parole.
So thanks to you, Mr Coogan,
she will finish her sentence.
And... on the way
back to her place,
she and I had a long talk.
She's a painfully
graphic little girl.
She gave me a play-by-play
description of...
how you slept with her, boots and...
You came here at four o'clock in the
morning just to tell me all this?
I...
I thought I saw
something in you. I...
Shut up down there!
All this talk about Linny Raven.
Is that really why you're so mad?
- You're takin' me to Ringerman.
- No!
Keep goin'.
I'll be right behind you.
Jimmy! Jimmy!
Jimmy!
Jimmy! Jimmy!
- What the hell are you doin' here?
- I brought him here. I had to.
You shoulda seen him!
He was gonna bust my face open!
- Who'd you bring here?
- The cowboy.
He was right behind me
and now he's gone.
What'd you bring him here for?
You stupid freak!
Ringerman!
Ringerman!
Hey! Ringerman!
Jimmy! Jimmy!
Jimmy!
Jimmy!
Jimmy!
Come on, you son of a bitch.
Come on!
You damn fool!
Hey!
Where the hell are you goin'
with my bike?
Hey!
Hey, come back with my bike!
Where are you goin'?
I'm makin' a citizen's arrest.
Take him back to Bellevue.
I'm gettin' too old for
these police cars.
When do "I" get him?
First you go to the DA's office,
then the state supreme court.
Then you don't lay a glove on him until
he's officially released by Bellevue.
Now, is that all right with you?
Yeah. That's all right
with me, Lieutenant.
Much obliged.
Come on.
Lieutenant.
- Sheriff.
- Thanks.
My regards to Tex... uh...
Arizona.
that you give the sheriff a call.
I say again, Coogan,
call the sheriff.
It is urgent... repeat: urgent...
that you call the sheriff...
Put your pants on, Chief.
Mm... Coogan.
Mm-hm.
- He still in Phoenix?
- Mm-hm.
- Expecting anyone else?
- Mm-mm.
What the hell's that?
Oh. Prisoner.
- Uh-huh? What'd he do?
- Just killed a woman.
Just his wife, that's all.
Uh-uh.
How long you been trackin' him?
Three days.
You need a bath.
- After.
- Now.
- Now?
- Uh-huh.
Hm.
Stop!
What the hell for?
Back it up!
Go on in!
- Need a bigger target?
- There ain't none in this county, baby.
When I assign a deputy to a roadblock, I
expect him to be there when I come back.
- Mornin', Sheriff.
- Millie.
Ever cross your mind I might
accidentally know what I'm doin'?
You mind handin' me the soap?
Direct disobedience to orders, dereliction
of duty, leaving an assigned post.
Those are the first
three I think of.
- The fugitive's on the porch.
- I saw him. That's just one thing more.
Get my back, will you?
That's a prisoner out there. Not
an animal to be tethered to a rail.
- My shirt's in there on the bed.
- For what?
- The badge on it comes right off.
- You wanna play the lonesome boy, fine!
You'll get a gutful. Every lousy
one-man job that comes along.
- Got one waiting for you right now.
- That so?
Be in front of my desk in one hour.
Don't bother to stand up and salute.
One hour!
Texas?
Arizona.
My home town.
- Business trip?
- You might call it that.
- Rancher?
- Deputy sheriff.
- Is that right? May I ask what you're...
- Extraditing a fugitive.
One of your cowboys step
outta line in our fair city?
No. One of your boys
stepped outta line in ours.
Head of the line, cowboy.
- That's luggage.
- What?
- That thing in your hand, that's luggage.
- So, it's luggage.
So it's 50 cents extra
for a piece of luggage.
Where to, cowboy?
177 East 104th Street.
- You from Texas?
- Arizona.
- You with the rodeo?
- Nope.
Everybody wear them
clothes in Arizona?
No. Lifeguards wear swim trunks.
Nurses wear white dresses.
What do they wear here?
That's $2.95,
including the luggage.
Tell me, how many stores are there
named Bloomingdale's in this town?
- One. Why?
- We passed it twice.
It's still $2.95
including the luggage.
Yeah.
Well, there's three dollars,
including the tip.
Oh, sure, you want him arrested.
What's gonna happen when we get
him downtown? I'll tell ya what.
You'll say it was a big mistake and swear
you fell downstairs, just like last time.
But when he's arrested,
I feel sorry.
Look, Mrs Amador...
- You want something?
- Deputy Coogan.
- Is that the whole thing?
- I'm looking for a Lieutenant McElroy.
Up the stairs.
Now, look. Mrs Amador, why
don't you just divorce the bum?
- I cannot do that!
- You got to!
How can I divorce?
We're not married.
Up there, stickin' yourself
in the arm with that poison?
Soliciting what?
Look, Officer, when a lady can't
adjust her stockings, the world's...
Hey, Slim!
Sir, Third Avenue's a public street.
We've got as much right to as anybody...
- Get "her."
- Look at all that, in two-inch heels!
Do you work out? Do you?
Come in!
We got no chance
of getting a conviction.
- I got a confession!
- Be right with you.
Look, do you read?
Do you take a morning paper?
There's such a thing as a supreme court.
Did you ever hear of it?
You can be damn sure
DiBlasio's lawyer has.
- What's your problem?
- My name's Coogan.
So?
You got a James Ringerman here
you're holding for me?
Oh, yeah. Deputy sheriff,
Texas, right?
- Arizona. I have the papers for him here.
- I'm sure you do. Leave your number...
- Should I spring DiBlasio?
- No, hold him...
Lieutenant McElroy here.
No. Hold him until I check with
the district attorney's office.
- You got it?
- Yes.
What number?
Your phone number,
hotel where you're staying.
- I'm not staying anyplace.
- Well, find yourself a place.
- Ringerman's not ready.
- Oh? Why not?
He took a little trip.
Look, I understood that you were
holding him in custody here for me.
An LSD trip. He's in the
prison ward at Bellevue.
In jail?
- Do you want a written report?
- Without the search.
Yes, sir.
How did he get this LSD in jail?
We serve it every day like
peanuts at the cocktail hour.
Lieutenant McElroy.
No.
- Because I said no, that's all.
- Uh... Lieutenant...
I want everybody to feel free to just
come bustin' in here night and day.
- It's Mrs Fowler.
- Oh, yeah.
- I wanted to talk to you.
- Look, Lieutenant...
You can't make out a rape
complaint and then just take off.
We've got an APB out for that guy.
The streets aren't
safe in this town.
Uh... Fowler. That's it. Fowler.
- When does he get out of the hospital?
- Hm? Who?
- Ringerman! Who are we talkin' about?
- When the doctor says he can get out.
- Take a few days, see the town.
- I've already seen the town.
You like orange juice? You'll love
Broadway. Ask anybody where it is.
You made another rape
complaint four months ago.
"Attempted" rape.
And I sent a detective up
to talk to you at the time.
"He" tried to rape me, too.
Did "I" ever try to rape you?
- Get her outta here!
- Lady, you need a psychiatrist.
I went to one and he
tried to rape me, too.
Out, out!
You still here?
Look, Lieutenant. Suppose, um...
Suppose I sign a receipt for the prisoner.
Then he'd be my responsibility, right?
Look, Tex, the only way you'll ever
lay your hands on James Ringerman
is if a New York State judge
renders him into your custody.
You can't think about that
until he's released from Bellevue.
- When will that be?
- A week, a month?
How the hell do I know?
I'm no doctor.
Lieutenant McElroy.
Don't call us, we'll call you.
Huh? Yeah. I got it
right here on my desk.
Sorry I'm late. I'm Julie Roth,
your sister's probation officer.
- How come you never been to the place?
- I've been there lots. You're never home.
Come up some night,
I'll show you the roof.
I've seen a roof.
Hey, that I like.
You know somethin'?
You're pretty good-looking for a cop.
Thank you.
Next you're gonna ask me if I make it
with all the good-looking fuzz here.
Well, the answer is no,
not all of them.
Nothing you say or do will shock or
upset me, so let's cut out the nonsense.
What do you know!
I can feel your heart.
OK, Joe, you've shown me.
Wow, feel that thing beat.
Joe, will you please keep
your hands to yourself.
Tick, tick, tick.
Guess you didn't hear the lady,
did you, boy?
Cool it, cowboy. There's plenty
here for both of us, huh?
Tick, tick, tick.
What the hell do you think you're
doing? And who are you, anyway?
- I'm a cop, lady, just like you are.
- I don't happen to be a cop.
- Are you all right, Joe?
- Yeah.
Let me see.
Look, I'm a stranger in town, ma'am. I'm
not from Texas. Arizona. I just thought...
There was no need for violence.
Well, yeah. I can see that now.
I'm sorry about that.
- I think you should apologise.
- OK, ma'am, I apologise.
- Not to me! To him!
- Now, wait just a minute.
No, I don't want no apologies.
Just keep that creep
away from me, huh?
Joe...
Joe! Joe!
Thanks.
Do you know how long
it's taken me to find that boy?
- I'll be glad to go get him for you.
- No.
- I'll be glad to bring him back, really.
- By the scruff of the neck?
And we wonder why
these kids hate cops.
Found something about New York
you like, Tex?
He just calls me that.
Really my name is Coogan.
If I fouled things up for you,
I'm sorry.
- I just thought...
- Did you? Think?
Well, yeah. I just...
We don't treat people like that
in New York, Mr Coogan.
- How do you treat 'em?
- I doubt it'd interest you.
- Try me.
- It's a long story.
I just happen to have some time.
Here.
Maybe you know a nice little place
we can have lunch and talk about it.
Sorry, Mr Coogan.
You're not my type.
How can you tell?
- The hat, maybe.
- Oh, that? That comes right off.
Are you dense, or just stubborn?
Hungry mostly.
Come on.
You know, I'm always interested
in new techniques.
Psychophysiological, hm?
It's a branch of psychology
that deals with
the fundamental relationships
between mind and body.
So it's psychophysiological
autogenesis.
Alphagenics for short.
- Alphagenic?
- Mm.
I've been experimenting
with it up at my place...
- You live near here?
- Not far.
You do this experiment
at your house, hm?
Oh, yes, it's much better there. It's
warm and informal. At the precinct...
Seems like an interesting setup.
In fact...
Thank you.
- What do you want?
- Your check, sir.
- Yeah, I saw it.
- Oh, it is getting late.
Why don't you just run along, huh?
- Yes, sir.
- Waiter, just a minute.
It's after three.
I have to be going.
- What are you doin'?
- Dutch.
- You're the girl, aren't you?
- There have been rumours to that effect.
Well, you just sit back
and act like one.
How?
Take everything you can get,
that's how.
Is that the way the
girls act in Arizona?
That's the way everybody
acts everywhere.
You too?
- Especially me.
- Thank you.
You're welcome.
Thank you.
You're welcome.
- Uh... I'll take my bag.
- That's all right. I'll carry it.
- But I have to go now.
- Fine. Where to?
You don't understand.
I have a dozen things to do.
- Good. I'll help you.
- But I'll be all day and half the night.
I've got nothing but time.
I wouldn't get too
comfortable, Mr Coogan.
Nobody calls me "Mr"
with my boots off.
I don't know your first name.
How about just Coogan,
without the "Mr"?
Julie.
I don't remember telling you mine.
Yeah, well,
that's my police trainin'.
Po-lice trainin'?
Yeah.
See, it's on your magazines here.
Name and address
of the subscription.
How are you?
I thought you wanted
to learn about alphagenics.
Oh, I do. I do.
Good.
My files.
I only handle young,
single girls.
Yeah.
Me too.
Now, briefly...
autogenesis is basically
a programme of...
self-regeneration,
- the main point of attack being the...
- What?
core of self-contempt
that is always a principal factor.
This we do by means...
of a tape recorder,
which is right here.
The programme is based on behavioural
psychological principles,
the position being that all
human and animal response...
is the result of...
conditioned reflex...
which, as you know, is simply
a particular bodily response...
to a particular...
stimulus.
- Phone.
- Forget it.
Hello?
Yes, this is she. Who?
Laura!
It's one of my girls.
Yes?
Oh, not him again.
Now, you know that the terms of your
probation specifically stated that...
Well, of course it's difficult.
I understand that
better than you think.
Well, yes, he's...
You can always say no,
can't you?
No.
All right. Fine.
I'll expect you in five minutes.
Five minutes.
Yeah.
Five minutes.
- Yeah?
- Single.
How long you gonna be staying?
No longer than I can help it.
All right. Room 304.
That'll be $7, in advance.
- The sign says five.
- Seven without luggage.
That ain't luggage.
A cab driver in this town'd
give you an argument.
- Do you want the room or not?
- No, no, I'll take it.
Excuse me, sir.
After you, sir.
- You really hit the jackpot tonight, sir.
- Yeah.
Fell right into it and came up
with a rose in your nose.
A lonesome lady
just down the hall.
I think she was stood
up on a date tonight.
And beautiful.
I mean, all the tools.
So long.
No trouble to give a
knock on the door.
So long, buddy.
Hi.
Help a lady in distress?
Wrong room.
I'm a girl who never had trouble
with a zipper in her life...
until tonight.
Be an angel man.
Up or down?
Well, let's put it this way, sport:
you're drivin'.
Out.
What's the matter?
- Are you some kind of religious fanatic?
- Come on, out.
All right, you cheap bum.
Who needs your lousy action?
Hold on a minute.
Texas faggot!
You Texas boys get up early.
It's Arizona.
And I figured I'd better get here
before the cuckoos start gatherin'.
What do you want?
Ringerman... now.
You've got a problem.
You don't listen.
Number one.
First you go down to the
district attorney's office
where they check your papers.
The affidavit of flight, request
for extradition, and so forth.
Number two.
Then you go down to the Supreme
Court of the State of New York,
where Judge Acosta renders
the fugitive into your custody.
But you can't do anything
until they release Ringerman from
the prison ward at Bellevue. OK?
- You could get him.
- I'm a busy man.
You could walk right in
and get him for me.
Tex, you're getting on my nerves. What
gives with you people? Too much sun?
Let's make it simple. Get outta my office
and don't come back until I send for you.
Coogan.
Piute County Sheriff's Office.
Lieutenant McElroy sent me up here
to pick up a James Ringerman.
Ringerman?
Yeah. Said he'd appreciate it
if you'd snap it up a little.
He's parked in the ambulance zone.
The man said he can only stay a second.
If you'd be kind enough
to open this one.
No, not without a medical release.
I understood that medical release
went through last night.
Not listed here.
It probably hasn't reached
this department yet.
If you'll open up here, I can straighten
it out with the doctor right away.
I can't let you through.
He's already got one visitor.
Oh?
- That's it, huh?
- That's it.
What's your name, Officer?
- What for?
- Well, when somebody asks me
why Judge Acosta of the New York State
Supreme Court's been kept waiting,
I gotta give 'em a name.
- Yeah. Now, just a minute...
- Do I get the name
or do I have to have Lieutenant
McElroy come and get it for me?
Just a second!
Everybody tells me
somethin' different.
Rudy!
Take him in to see Ringerman.
You'll call the doc, huh?
Call the doc.
Well, looky, looky, looky!
And they say the West
ain't wild any more!
Hey, if it ain't Hoot Gibson!
Give me a home
where the buffalo roam
And the deer and
the antelope play
Well, well, looky here.
Coogan.
Hey, Linny, say hello to the
fuzz that busted me in Arizona.
Yeah. Man-burger.
Did you come to take
me back, cowboy? Huh?
This cat's got wild vibes.
Hey, man, she's pickin' up
on your vibrations.
You wanna know the thing about me?
I got this little
green worm in my head.
And it glows in the dark.
That's the thing about me.
- I'm Coogan.
- Yes, Rollins told me.
Apparently there's been a mix-up.
- Can he travel?
- How soon were you planning to leave?
I was trying to make a helicopter
in 45 minutes at Pan Am.
- I'd hate to miss that connection.
- Yes, I understand, but...
there's always danger of residual
psychotic reaction to LSD.
He can be trouble.
So can I.
- You travelling alone?
- Just one of him and one of me.
All right, I'll release him.
Put your clothes on, Ringerman.
You're going on another trip.
Give Pushie my regards, huh?
OK?
- OK.
- Yeah.
Does more for me
than a kilo of grass, huh?
Put your pants on, boy.
Will all passengers kindly
proceed to the boarding area. Thank you.
Call for passenger Coogan
on housephone 1G.
- Where are the housephones?
- Back there, sir.
- Coogan here.
- Wrong number.
- Yeah, crazy baby.
- Kill him, Jimmy. Kill him, Jimmy.
Not here! Let's blow!
Green pants, hm?
Green corduroy.
Had a red sweater.
He had a face?
I told you, he was behind me.
Beautiful.
Look, I was on my back
and that's all I saw.
All right. From the top,
let's start again.
From where you bluffed your way
into Ringerman's hospital room.
I haven't left anything out.
- Thing is, I don't know that for sure.
- I told you.
Come back in the morning.
The patient's in need of rest.
- Just a couple more minutes, Doctor.
- All right.
Look, yesterday we had
a prisoner in custody.
Today we've got a fugitive wandering
around with your gun in his pocket.
- Think about it.
- I have been.
We need your cooperation.
What you remember on the plane home
won't help us get Ringerman right now.
I'm not leaving
without that prisoner.
Didn't that whack on the head
teach you anything?
You're in a whole... another kind of
ball game. You're out of your league.
We've got 28,000 cops in the city.
Leave Ringerman to us.
Well, it's gettin' personal now.
Yeah, a man's gotta do
what a man's gotta do.
That it, Wyatt?
That's one way of puttin' it,
Lieutenant.
Well, here's another: forget it.
Understand? That's
not just me talking.
This is from the district
attorney's office.
You are not a policeman in the city
of New York. Am I getting through?
- I still carry a badge.
- In Arizona you're a deputy sheriff!
Here you're just another private
citizen... with a headache.
- I'll be back tomorrow.
- Yeah, you do that.
What do you want?
- Ringerman?
- There's no such person here.
- Police. Open up.
- I gotta see a warrant.
All right!
Will ya wait a minute?!
Upstairs, 25.
Outta the way.
Yeah?
Oh, yeah?
So it's the cops.
Well, let 'em come.
Well, well, well!
What have we got here?
Buffalo Bill with the fancy hat!
And look!
Boots with the pointy toes.
Very fancy.
I'm not impressed.
You Mrs Ringerman?
Come in. Come in, Mr Cowboy.
I got nothin' to hide. I'm not
even asking for a search warrant
cos I got nothin' whatsoever
to hide from nobody.
Welcome to my palace.
Course, the prince just
happens to be out,
but that's cos the police
are just hounding him.
Well, you're very polite,
with your fancy hat in your hand.
At least you know how
to enter a lady's home, anyway.
Where is he, Mrs Ringerman?
You outta your head? I should tell
you so you take him back to jail?
You're talkin' to his mother.
Let me show you somethin'.
Just look what I got in here.
Look at this.
Genuine sterling
silver dinnerware.
My son gave it to me.
And look at this.
Hand-painted imported oil painting.
Gifts! Gifts from a
son to his mother.
And look.
How many mothers do you know...
Just look at this.
A fur coat he got for me.
- How?
- How? He went to the store.
Was it open for business?
You try to be nice.
So what do you get?
Fancy remarks.
Maybe you've been here
long enough, Mr Cowboy.
Look, Mrs Ringerman, I just
wanna take him back for trial.
Oh, yeah?
I don't usually make
no deals with cops.
Be smart if you did.
Smart? Smartness is one thing.
Motherhood's another.
Motherhood?
That's what you're talkin' to,
Mr Cowboy: motherhood.
- He does all right, doesn't he?
- 24 hours, the phone never stops.
- A nice motorcycle.
- Bought and paid for with his own money.
You wanna see his owner's licence?
No.
- Pretty.
- Yeah. Linny Raven. That's her name.
A certified ding-dong.
Raven, huh?
OK, Mrs Ringerman.
Thank you for the visit.
Is that all?
Hey, wait a minute! You think you
can come in here, write down a name
and put on that fancy
hat and just go?
You know what you are?
Fancy.
You smart-ass cowboy cop!
I hope you break both legs!
- What's goin' on here?
- You're under arrest.
- What's the charge?
- Impersonating an officer.
I wake up stinkin' like a goat.
No bath.
Couldn't even take a shave.
Cockroaches.
- And now because of you, for what?
- You've met Sergeant Wallace.
Do you know what it means when
you've got a stakeout established
and some rockhead walks in
and blows it... Oh, damn!
Where do you come off, anyway?
This isn't the OK
Corral around here.
This is the city of New York!
We've got a system!
Not much, but we're fond of it.
We don't like it when a two-for-a-nickel
cowboy tries to bend it out of shape.
Are you chargin' me or what?
You blew a stakeout!
It involved a lot of time and trouble
and discomfort for Sergeant Wallace.
You thought Ringerman'd go there?
- It has happened.
- Not with him it wouldn't.
Where does it say you're
an expert on Ringerman?
I tracked him down for eight days. You
learn a lot about a person hunting him.
- Like what?
- Like that he's not a fool, that's what.
Then how in the hell
did "you" collar him?
If you'd asked us about Mrs Ringerman,
we'd have told you she's a nut!
There's no point in
going up there to see her.
I wanted her out so I
could look the place over.
- She wasn't going anyplace.
- There's a good chance she would have.
Why?
The same way an animal leaves a nest
in another direction... to throw you off.
Well, what do you know!
Woodcraft!
It's the one merit badge I missed.
That's too bad.
You might have learned something.
About what?
About animals. People. They don't act
much different when you're hunting 'em.
Hold it.
This came for you.
Which makes it unanimous.
I took the liberty.
You're on flight number 73, TWA.
Leaves at 4.15pm.
They'd like you there
a half-hour earlier.
I'll think about that.
Coogan.
I'm through messin'
around with you.
Obstructing justice is a
one-to-five felony. Forget Ringerman.
If I even suspect you're nosin'
around between now and plane time,
I'll throw you in the can so fast,
it'll make your nose bleed!
- What happened in there?
- Nothin' much.
Didn't you get taken off
the Ringerman case?
News travels fast
around here, doesn't it?
I was in the room
when McElroy called Arizona.
Yeah, old Sheriff McCrea must have
really enjoyed that phone call.
He doesn't like you?
Oh, he likes me some of the time.
- Most of the time not.
- Why?
He looks at me, he sees a man
who's gonna take his job some day.
I believe it.
There's the Cloisters.
Would you like to go through it?
"No, thank you, Julie.
Some other time."
I'm trying to picture
it the way it was.
Just the trees and the river, before
people came along and fouled it all up.
Thinking "He's out there
somewhere"... Ringerman, your prey?
- Right.
- Mm-hm.
Can I tell you something else?
McElroy wasn't just kidding.
He said he'd throw you in jail
and he meant it.
Well, he's just trying to protect you.
Can't you see that?
That's Ringerman's home court out there
and you don't even know the rules.
So...
do yourself a favour and...
stop thinking about him.
- I wasn't.
- Oh? What, then?
Worms.
Little green kind of ones
that glow in the dark.
- Green worms?
- Yeah. Green.
You are so enigmatic.
Enig... what?
It's a word that
keeps coming to mind.
Except it's a phoney.
It is, huh?
There has to be something
more to you besides...
What?
I dunno. Love. Compassion.
Humanity. Capacity for pity.
- Pity?
- Mm. You must have heard of it.
Yeah. What colour is it?
It's no colour!
See? You don't know
what you're talkin' about.
I don't know what "you're"
talking about, that's for sure.
Well, the colour of pity is red.
- Really? Hm.
- Oh, I've seen some once.
- Where?
- It doesn't make any difference.
Oh, I give up on you.
I'm looking for a key.
Lots of luck.
I can't even find the door.
Well...
It was a bus station
in Prescott, Arizona.
It was all over the floor, pity.
This guy felt sorry for a
prisoner he was takin' in.
He let him say
goodbye to his wife.
He ended up with
a six-inch blade in his gut.
The wife had it up her sleeve.
So much for pity.
Who was it?
Aren't we gonna have a spaghetti
dinner, or was that just talk?
It was you, wasn't it?
I'm really ready for spaghetti.
OK. And thank you.
For what?
Just... thank you.
I'll say this. Once you find
a subject that interests you,
you certainly keep after it.
Why not?
I think we better
change the subject.
All righty.
Do you know a girl
named Linny Raven?
Yes, I'm her probation
officer. Why?
I'm just curious, that's all.
That's privileged information,
Coogan. You know that.
You were the one who
wanted to change the subject.
Tell me about Arizona.
Why don't you come
see for yourself?
- Is that an invitation?
- Now, what's it sound like?
Here, I'll give you a hand.
- I just got a picture of that.
- What?
Me galloping up to the old
corral with my sleeping bag.
You might be surprised.
Hm?
At what?
At Arizona.
It's part of the Union now.
- Thank you.
- You're welcome.
Electricity, indoor plumbing, TV...
all that.
You wouldn't even have to bring a
sleeping bag. I got all the conveniences.
And girls?
Yeah, you might see a stray
one of those floatin' around.
I mean you. Girlfriends.
I never took a census. Why?
I don't know. I just judged you
to be rather busy in that area.
- You did?
- Mm.
- How about you with men?
- I don't need a census. I can count them.
You can?
How did we get back
on this subject?
It wasn't easy. Just fate.
- I think you may be right.
- Usually am.
- Are you?
- Mm-hm.
Dinner.
Still running?
A good spaghetti sauce should
simmer for about three hours.
Mmm.
Mm.
You know, if you have one decent
spark in your whole body, you'd...
Coogan?
I say love is a
pigeon-toed orange peel
Pigeon-toed orange peel
No more, no less
A pigeon-toed orange peel
Pigeon-toed orange peel
And it's real, love is real
Pigeon-toed orange peel
No more, no less
Pigeon-toed orange peel
And it's real, love is real
I say love is a
pigeon-toed orange peel
A pigeon-toed orange peel
No more, no less
A pigeon-toed orange peel
Hey, Groovy! Groovy!
Hey, Groovy! You in the hat!
Hey, hey, big man!
Ooooh!
Ooh, looking for anyone special?
Linny Raven. Is she around?
If you're willing to
settle for second best.
Nirvana City, back room.
I say love is a
pigeon-toed orange peel
A pigeon-toed orange peel
No more, no less
A pigeon-toed orange peel
Pigeon-toed orange peel
And it's real, love is real
Are you lookin' straight at me
to see a sign of love?
Are you lookin' straight at me
to hear a line of love?
Are you reachin' out to me
to see if lovin' has a feel?
Do you know the answer to
the question "Is love real?"
I say love is a
pigeon-toed orange peel...
There you go, baby.
- Linny.
- Who is your friend?
This is Wonderful Digby
and this is Omega.
I'm Coogan. Been lookin' for you.
Yeah, wild.
But we were just about to split.
Um...
- I wanna talk to you.
- Hey, Charlie.
Coogan.
Coogan.
112 Ellwood Street.
Way up on the top.
Yeah, I was already up there.
They told me you were down here.
Well, try again.
And wear your boots, cowboy.
- I'm wearin' 'em right now.
- So you are.
Hey, Charlie.
- It's still Coogan.
- It's Charlie.
As in "Goodbye, Charlie."
As in "Ladybug, ladybug,
fly away home."
Look, friends. We wanna be alone.
- Uh-uh. Go away, Charlie.
- Yeah, while your legs still work.
All right, now. I don't like violence,
Mr Wonderful... whatever your name is.
You better drop that blade or you
won't believe what happens next,
even while it's happenin'.
The blade.
It's dropped.
Would you have?
Would I have what?
With the broken bottle?
Gouged him?
Hm?
I don't know. That was up to him.
Good heavens!
How's everything in Australia?
What do you want? Hm?
Cat got your tongue?
No.
Joe Straight.
What's your bag, Joe?
Music? Hm?
No?
Grass, hm?
Dig grass? Hm?
Juice. Hm?
A drinking man.
Occasionally.
Why me, Mr Cowboy?
Cos I liked what
I saw in the hospital.
So did I.
It's what happened afterwards
that I didn't care for too much.
What are you talking about?
Something about getting sapped on
the head has a weird effect on me.
- What's sapped?
- You know.
Mm-mm.
Liar.
- I'd never lie to cowboys.
- You wouldn't, huh?
Do me a favour.
Tell me where Ringerman is.
I just wanna talk to him.
- You want Jimmy?
- Mm-hm.
I know where he is.
Later.
Come on, shoot.
You gonna take all night?
Ha-ha! Great shot!
He's looking for Jimmy Ringerman.
Pushie. He hasn't got a gun.
Looking for Jimbo, eh?
Yeah.
You lost?
Shouldn't leave your horse, cowboy.
Cool it, cool it.
Come on, come on.
Let's get out of here.
Where's Ringerman?
You bastard.
Have you any idea
of the damage you've done?
I'm talking about Linny Raven.
I just got her out of jail.
She was picked up near that pool room.
Do you know what that means?
Violation of parole.
So thanks to you, Mr Coogan,
she will finish her sentence.
And... on the way
back to her place,
she and I had a long talk.
She's a painfully
graphic little girl.
She gave me a play-by-play
description of...
how you slept with her, boots and...
You came here at four o'clock in the
morning just to tell me all this?
I...
I thought I saw
something in you. I...
Shut up down there!
All this talk about Linny Raven.
Is that really why you're so mad?
- You're takin' me to Ringerman.
- No!
Keep goin'.
I'll be right behind you.
Jimmy! Jimmy!
Jimmy!
Jimmy! Jimmy!
- What the hell are you doin' here?
- I brought him here. I had to.
You shoulda seen him!
He was gonna bust my face open!
- Who'd you bring here?
- The cowboy.
He was right behind me
and now he's gone.
What'd you bring him here for?
You stupid freak!
Ringerman!
Ringerman!
Hey! Ringerman!
Jimmy! Jimmy!
Jimmy!
Jimmy!
Jimmy!
Come on, you son of a bitch.
Come on!
You damn fool!
Hey!
Where the hell are you goin'
with my bike?
Hey!
Hey, come back with my bike!
Where are you goin'?
I'm makin' a citizen's arrest.
Take him back to Bellevue.
I'm gettin' too old for
these police cars.
When do "I" get him?
First you go to the DA's office,
then the state supreme court.
Then you don't lay a glove on him until
he's officially released by Bellevue.
Now, is that all right with you?
Yeah. That's all right
with me, Lieutenant.
Much obliged.
Come on.
Lieutenant.
- Sheriff.
- Thanks.
My regards to Tex... uh...
Arizona.