Coup! (2023) Movie Script

1


[birds chirping]

["Me and My Gal" playing
on record player]
[soft scraping]
What a beautiful day
(What a beautiful day)
For a wedding in May
(For a wedding in May)
[humming softly]
See the people all stare
At the lovable pair
(At the lovable pair)
She's a beacon of joy
(She's a beacon of joy)
He's the luckiest boy
(He's the luckiest boy)
In his wedding array
(In his wedding array)...
Old mustache would do me
a touch of class.
The bells are ringing
Mm.
For me and my gal
(I love to hear...)
Let's see how we did.
For me and my gal
(For me and my gal)
Everybody's been knowing
To a wedding they're going
And for weeks
they've been sewing
Every Susie and Sal
Not bad.
[ominous music]
It's a goddamn shame, Floyd.
The moment
you build something up,
they just come
and take it all away.
[slamming]
JAY: The war has come home,
dear readers.
[distant police whistling]
Yesterday, we lost
more Americans in our city
than soldiers overseas.
This epidemic is decimating
our nation.
The president,
fixated on the war in Europe,
now threatens to jail
any journalist
who reports
on our true killer --
the flu from Spain.
[distant siren wailing]
[boat horn bellowing]
FERRY CAPTAIN:
Next stop -- Egg Island.
[splash]
[unzipping]
[soft trickling]
As always, the real victims
are the workers.
They have been left to die
like dogs in ghettos,
while the president's
capitalist cronies
shelter in their
country mansions.
Our push for citywide business
closures can only save so many.
Mr. President, we, the forgotten
people of the United States,
demand action.
We, the poor and dispossessed,
we, the immigrants
and the outsiders,
we, the colored and voiceless,
demand nationwide closures.
Mr. President,
send the workers home.
Shut it all down.
[sighing]

[birds chirping]
MOLLY: "You know that place
between sleep and awake,
that place
where you remember dreaming?
That's where I'll always
love you, Peter Pan."
[soft applause]
That doesn't sound
like schoolwork.
It is, Papa.
Molly's Tinker Bell in the play.
Well, let's focus
on the real studies.
Long division for Tinker Bell
and grammar for Mr. Pan,
if memory serves.
-Yes, sir.
-Thank you.
No Latin for the first one up.
Come on.
[laughing]
"Disloyal, profane,
and scurrilous language
about the U.S. government."
"Scurrilous."
That's a first.
Another cease-and-desist?
President's goons now claiming
that my push for closures
is tantamount to sedition.
They're grasping at straws
to shut me up.
Won't they be surprised to
find you so obliging for once?
You did tell them you'll be
staying here until it passes?
Yeah. Of course.
Yes.
Catherine mentioned
that you brought on a new cook.
-Mm-hmm.
-A stranger.
Surely these creature comforts
aren't worth the risk.
Jules, the agency takes
every precaution imaginable.
It even requires staff
to isolate for days.
You know, Catherine said
she had to drop her coins
in the grocer's vinegar bucket
because no one will touch money.
And she said
she saw whole families
-with trunks full of supplies.
-Jules, there is no plague
on Egg Island.
Civilization is
not breaking down.
Oh-- I was gonna keep that.
[laughter]
You're trespassing.
[laughing]
No, ma'am.
I'm Floyd.
Floyd Monk.
I'm the new cook.
Papers.
[high-pitched laugh]
You were meant
to arrive yesterday.
My apologies, ma'am.
Permit didn't clear in time.
Things are pretty backed up at
City Hall, as you might imagine.
Perhaps you should
have taken that
into account
and filed sooner.
I filed the moment
I heard I got this gig.
I couldn't get here...
soon enough.
I woke up in hell,
and here I am in paradise.
Can I help you with that?
That's very gracious of you.
You'll have to manage,
Mr. Kaan.
He needs to be sanitized.
There are rules, Mr. Monk,
that all staff are required
to follow.
The house rules.
The Hortons demand
absolute isolation.
No one leaves the property for
anything other than necessities.
Groceries, supplies, the like.
This isolation will not be
a problem for you?
No, ma'am.
I feel right at home.
Which one of them rooms is mine?
None of them.
Our quarters are here.
This way.
The Hortons take supper
at 7:00 sharp.
An eggplant casserole will make
a fine first impression.
Mm.
I bet some people wonder
if what you call a muckraker...
living in a place like this
could really mean
-all he's writing.
-Mr. Horton plans
to donate the estate
to the public.
He's dedicated his life
to fighting for us workers.
That's wonderful.
I hear he exposed his own
father's meat-packing business.
His own flesh and blood.
Now, how do you not get cut
out of the will for that?
How do you know so much
about Mr. Horton?
I'm a fan.
Allow me to introduce
our new cook, Mr. Monk.
-Welcome to our home.
-What a beautiful home it is.
Truly.
I see that pool in
the other room with the water.
-JAY: Mm-hmm.
-That's for swimming?
[laughter]
-Of course.
-I seen Willie Hearst
got something like that.
Miss McMurray, I imagine,
has acquainted you
with the privileges
we offer our staff here.
You're invited to use my library
as your own and borrow greedily.
Here, we do hope
to help the staff move on
from service work,
if that's what their wish is.
My wish is to never eat old
McMurray's cooking ever again.
-Molly.
-What happened to your finger?
I just blew it off
right at the nub.
You can see right there.
We was taking
San Juan Hill in '98.
-Right there. It's clean off.
-Can I touch it?
-BOTH: No.
-Still see the bone.
We are against mechanized
mass slaughter here.
We are conscientious objectors.
In this home, we don't believe
in taking life of any kind.
Not in war,
not even for succor.
[chuckles]
All right.
Uh...
I'm curious, Mr. Monk.
Which restaurant did you say you
worked in prior to joining us?
It was just a little tavern.
You wouldn't have known.
-Try me.
-Oh, it's...
I'll tell you what, though.
We made a damn good gin rickey.
-[laughing]
-Ahh.
But we had to shut it down
with the closures.
I am very sorry
for your loss.
At least I have my health.
All right.
Enjoy your succor.
Mr. Monk is
an interesting fellow.
-FAMILY: Ooh!
-JAY: Oh.
But maybe a good cook.
Boss wants to eat leaves.
That's his right.
I just don't see
why we can't eat meat.
When you have
an estate of your own,
you can stuff your face with
all the meat your heart desires.
You worked here a while, huh?
Delivered Mr. Horton
into this world.
Bless you.
What about you, Sheikh?
What's a guy like you
doing in this country
at a time like this?
I make music back home
in Istanbul.
I come to America
for Tin Pan Alley.
I hear the streets are
paved with gold.
When I get here,
I learn two things.
One, streets are not
paved with gold.
And two, I was expected
to pave them.
-[chuckling]
-You just count your luckies
my Jerome ain't burying you
in a trench.
369th, Harlem Hellfighter,
my Jerome.
When he returns from the front,
he's gonna be putting me
though medical school.
Mr. Horton is writing
a letter of recommendation.
Though it's doubtful
any school will accept her.
She's a dreamer.
She's hasn't learned
the one law of the land.
Either you have servants,
or you are one.
FLOYD: All right.
Where y'all keep the hooch?
Staff has never permitted
to consume alcohol.
House rules.
I saw Mr. Horton nursing
a glass of scotch at supper.
You will abide by our rules,
or you will be on the first
ferry back to the city.
Do you understand?
Yes, ma'am.
The National Woman's Party
called off our drive.
I feel myself
getting idle already.
I know what you're gonna say,
you're gonna say
that I should work
on the biography, but...
I think
it's a bit of a mess.
-I was thinking...
-Damn it.
...why don't I try my hand
at fiction again?
Jay?
I'm sorry.
Today, after my story broke,
the president's goons
ransacked our office.
-Was anyone hurt?
-No.
No, but Harry's convinced
the APL is tailing him.
Well, what about us?
Are we safe?
Of course.
Of course.
No one knows we're out here.
But Harry's refusing
to cover the influenza,
and so is everyone else.
You did all you could.
JAY:
Violent riots broke out
in cities
across our nation
over the president's handling
of the influenza.
This morning, I joined
the protesters at City Hall.
It was peaceful
until bloodthirsty soldiers
arrived on the scene.

[distant thud]
[distant thudding]

FLOYD: Hey, diddle-diddle.
Queen's in the middle.
Five will get you ten.
Ten will get you twenty.
Got eyes on the little lady?
-Give me the card.
-You dirty cheat.
Mr. Monk, what is this?
Just some things
I gathered for lunch.
This will all make you sick
as a parrot.
But this-- this will put
the devil in you.
Is that right?
Mr. Kaan,
dispose of this immediately.
And this is not
a riverboat casino.
Keep yourself to the kitchen
while you're inside this house.
Come on, Mr. Kaan.
Let's get ahead
of the morning crowds.
Boss is sure fighting
the good fight, hm?
Come up.
To your studies.
BOTH: Aww.
[grandfather clock chiming]
If schools remain closed,
someone will have
to tutor the children.
Mrs. Tidwell is
perfectly capable.
-But I...
-Or perhaps...
perhaps I could.
[chuckling]
No, Jules,
Jules, you...
you are a writer.
And you have more raw talent
in this fingernail
than I could ever hope for.
You have the power
to change the way people...
Thank you.
Bravo.
[laughing]
Bravo.
Ah.
[chuckling]
It is not every day
you meet someone
on the front page
of the papers.
-Mm-hmm.
-If I may.
If you could just indulge me.
"I saw the horror
in my comrades' eyes
as the president's men
landed their billy clubs
on the immigrants
and the colored,
whose blood clings to my shirt
even as I write."
"Even as I write."
You really stick it
to them fat-cat politicians.
Mm-hmm.
That's the power
of your writing.
So much respect for you.
Thank you.
It does feel like
you were really there.
-Was there even a protest?
-Of course.
Paper has a junior reporter
taking notes on the ground.
And I'll be
putting them together
in my own prose from here.
Is that not deceiving
your readers?
Woodrow Wilson is deceiving
the American people every day,
and his deceptions are
costing lives.
I am saving them.
Let me help you.
No, I'll be fine.
-What happened? Christ.
-No need to make a scene.
I'll survive.
There is panic at the market.
They're cleaning out the shops,
hoarding food,
fighting like rabid dogs.
Miss McMurray was attacked?
It was the Elway maid.
She stole our potatoes.
-Whore.
-JULES: Elway maid?
Well, why on earth
would she do such a thing?
The plague's come
to Egg Island.
They say a dozen cases
today alone.
The locals are blaming
the summer crowds.
I saw a farmer
set a Cadillac on fire.
Mr. Monk, you will
accompany Mr. Kaan to town
from here on out.
Now fetch a first aid kit.
Make it quick.
Why don't you kiss
my ass, nancy boy?
I beg your pardon.
What did you say?
Uh, why don't we get
some sassafras for the boy?
Kaan and I,
next time we're in town.
Fetch the kit.
[harmonica and guitar playing]
How many rooms do you reckon
there are up there?
Eight? Nine?
-A dozen, I believe.
-Mm-hmm.
There's plenty of room
for all of us.
We should just go on
and pack up and move in.
There ain't nothing
stopping us.
Nothing at all.
[sighing]
That's Mr. Horton's
single-malt.
-Mm-hmm.
-Put that back
where you found it, or you're
gonna get us all canned.
I bet you'd like to pull
from it, warm up a little bit.
We need this job, Floyd.
The Hortons can't replace us
not with people are dropping
like mayflies all over town.
All we got to do is ask.
We can ask for anything.
Our wish is their command.
You want to put
the screws on them?
Look, we got
a good thing going here.
Mr. Horton treats us right.
Better than most would.
We're risking our lives
every time we go shopping
for this family.
We deserve more.
Hmm?
Pay could be better.
A lot of things
could be better, Kaan.
New rules.
It's fair and due.
It's fair and due.
-Hell, yeah.
-Mm!
-That a girl.
-[coughing]
[laughter]
Mm.
[sighing]
[chuckling]
You're dreaming
if you think you're gonna
get McMurray on board.

"Dear Mr. Horton --
With the keenest of admiration,
I have been following
your lone defiance
of the president's
censorship regime.
McClure's Magazine wishes
to run a feature on you
and our fight
for a free press.
Penned by yours truly,
-Upton Sinclair."
-Upton Sinclair.
[heavy breathing]
Who is Upton Sinclair?
Only the second greatest
muckraker of our time.
And McClure's has more readers
than any other publication
in the entire country.
Are you gonna be famous
like Charlie Chaplin?
[laughing]
Is it not unusual
for a journalist
to be featured so prominently?
I imagine McClure's wishes
to get a sense
of who I am as a man.
Upton, of course, has become
somewhat of a kingmaker
to the Progressive Party.
So you've decided
you're going to run?
I've been chosen, Jules.
JULES: Oh!
Oh, how creative. Mr. Monk.
-Honey, look.
-JAY: This is the moment
we've been waiting for, Jules.
If I have Upton behind me,
I'm a shoo-in.
If I can get his endorsement,
the workers of this world
will get a governor
who gives a damn.
The power of Christ
compels you.
-Yes.
-The power of Christ
compels you.
[retches]
[all screaming]
FLOYD: She got
that flu from Spain.
KAAN: Must have got it
at the market.
FLOYD: Most likely.
There's a thickness to it.
Guy at my tavern had
the same bile.
Burn her sheets
and deep-clean the house.
Oh, Catherine!
Catherine, can you hear me?
I chartered you a boat
to take you to the finest doctor
-in the city.
-It's not influenza.
-What is she saying?
-I have no idea.
-It's just gibberish.
-I will be fine.
Let-- Let me out.
Oh, no can do.
House rules.
You.
You.
Him. Yes.
Yes, it's him.
-I think it's gone to her brain.
-Absolutely. Yes.
-Godspeed, Catherine.
-[Catherine whimpering]
Yes.
Thank you.
[engine rattling]
I see...

Is Miss McMurray gonna die?
Oh, of course not, honey.
Miss McMurray
will be right as rain
and back before you know it.
Let's get you both in the bath.
I-- I want
Mrs. Tidwell to do it.
Of course.
Come on, then.
KAAN: He's never
in good spirits after a nap.
-Yeah.
-We should wait.
No.
We're gonna do it now.
Stop-- Stop, Floyd--
Floyd-- Floyd, no!
You awake, boss?
Hey, boss, you awake?
[groaning]
We're done with the cleaning.
Thank you.
Yes... You may
get supper started.
That's good. Yes.
Thank you.
Man up, Kaan.
Sir, we have been talking
amongst ourselves,
and we have been putting
our lives at risk, you see.
-And...
-Mm-hm.
We feel that,
in order to continue...
additional compensation
is only fair.
You beat me to it.
Yes, Mr. Kaan.
With Miss McMurray's
tragic departure, yes,
you will be all taking on
additional chores,
and a raise is only fair.
Double?
[cough]
Double? You want me
to double your wages?
Mr. Kaan, if I refuse,
are you saying you will quit
and leave my family stranded
in the midst of a plague?
-I will double your wages.
-Thank you, sir.
-Thank-- Thank you, sir.
-That's awfully generous, sir.
-That's-- That's so kind.
-Thank you.
There is another small matter
that we should discuss.
-That's the servants' quarters.
-Staff.
Here, we call it
the staff quarters.
Well, it's no longer
satisfactory.
Did you not disinfect them
yourself?
It's not safe.
And what do you propose,
Mr. Monk?
[soft chatter]
JAY: There is something off
about that man.
Well, I wouldn't feel safe
in the staff quarters either.
FLOYD: Hell, yeah.
FLOYD: I tell you.
I don't think it had
anything to do with safety.
Then what?
Whoo.
The French ambassador
stayed here once.
-Mm-hm.
-Hope he kept it warm for me.
All right.
Oh.
One less road to pave,
huh, Genghis?
[groaning]
KAAN: You are
a crazy bastard, Floyd Monk.
[sighing]
KAAN: You can hear
the girls declare
He must be a billionaire
You can hear them sigh
and wish to die
You can see them wink
the other eye
At the man who broke
the bank at Monte Carlo
[humming loudly]
Mr. Kaan,
I must bathe in the pool now
because your bath
emptied the tank.
The staff will bathe
in the afternoon.
-Understood?
-Yes, sir.
Whoo!
[laughing]
Hey, Genghis,
now all we need
is a couple pieces
of hun tail.
Mr. Monk, the pool is never
to be used by staff.
I thought we was
all bunking together.
-But the pool is different.
-Why?
-Because it is.
-Why?
Your-- Your rooms
may have changed,
but the rules of this house
still remain the same.
-Mr. Horton.
-What?
Telephone for you, sir.
A Mr. Sinclair.
Get out... now.
Out.
What are you trying
to pull, Floyd?
We have it made now.
What more
could you possibly want?
Mm-- okay.
Count.
I'm not counting.
I'm not counting.
Upton! Upton, old sport.
How are you?
UPTON:
Horton, my dear dauphin.
[laughing] You do me--
you do me too much credit.
Perhaps you do
yourself too little.
-[laughing]
-Your writing,
your defiance
of the president
has many calling you
this generation's
penultimate muckraker.
And some are even convinced
the Progressive Party
has found its heir apparent.
You flatter me now.
Others are
calling your work
rank opportunism.
That is why I wanted to hear
from you directly.
What was it that motivated
your decision?
Upton,
I would say in a...
in a word, it would be...
...outrage.
Moral outrage
against the president's
censorship of the press.
Horton, I was referring to your
decision to remain in the city.
I mean, it's no secret you
could have sheltered in comfort,
like many other men
of your means.
And yet you remained
in the eye of the storm.
Why did you decide
to put your life on the line?
[rising dramatic strings]
I wouldn't--
I can't call it a decision.
I'm fighting a war here
with nothing
but my words as a weapon.
-If I may so borrow your words.
-[chuckling]
This plague is
decimating our city.
And if it were not
for the journalist
in times like these,
who's left to hold
the feet of the powerful
to the fire?
Skipping town was
never an option.
Quotable as always, Horton.
Mm.
Um... Upton,
if I may ask you
a question,
and I-- forgive me
for being too direct--
Don't pussyfoot with me.
You're itching to run.
You need McClure's to win.
I would, of course,
need to run any endorsement
by the editorial board.
Of course.
I'll see what I can do.
Well, thank you.
[birds chirping]
Excuse me.
-Hello.
-Hi, cutie pie.
-Hi--
-Sorry for being late.
Please don't say nothing to Leo.
He can be a real hothead.
No-- Leo? I'm sorry.
Who is Leo and who are you?
No one phoned ahead?
Owner's giving away this beaut.
Must have gone funny
in the head.
Ahh, um...
I am the owner.
Oh, how do you do?
-County clerk's office sent me.
-I'm fine, thank you.
I... they want to look
for their new park.
Wow.
Very presumptuous of them.
Oh, don't tell me
you're having cold feet.
You do plan on
donating the estate.
Yes.
Yes. Of course.
It's just we're in early stages.
And frankly,
this is not a good time.
You see, my family and I are
trying to isolate.
Don't be such a worrywart.
[laughter]
Don't worry.
I won't say nothing to Leo
about you getting
cold feet...
-cutie pie.
-Mm, ahh.
[ragtime recording playing]
You got to pony up
if you want to play a game.
-[slams down stack]
-[laughing]
-Genghis.
-Come on.
I've got nothing to lose.
Only dirty paper.
I'll chip in for you.
You pay me back
next payday?
-Deal.
-'Cause I love you.
He definitely said
we could use this room?
Anytime we want.
Did I shuffle the cards?
-Here, give me the cards.
-KAAN: She can do it.
[laughter]
-[slams down cards]
-Here we go.
Ahem.
I'll pretend
I didn't see anything
on one condition.
Deal me in.
[laughter]
-Give her some cards. Come on.
-What do we got? Hold 'em?
-Hm? Stud.
-Well, that's disappointing.
Because stud is to hold 'em
what checkers is chess.
Wow.
So you know a thing or two.
A life has many chapters,
Mr. Monk.
Mine have not always
been so ladylike.
[laughter]
[phone ringing]
Yes.
Catherine?
Oh, what a relief.
Yes-- Jules, it's Cath...
[laughter]
I was writing a play a week,
and I was getting drunk
every night...
You like it there.
You were Parisian.
Yeah, I did.
But when Jay proposed,
I had to come home.
KAAN: Next time you write,
I will do your music.
How about we leave
these kids, pack up,
and we all go to Paris,
the four of us?
-[laughter]
-Okay.
-I will drive.
-[laughter]
[ominous strings]
[ominous strings continue]
Jay!
I gave them permission.
Oh, honey, we all just
needed to unwind.
Miss McMurray telephoned.
She will be here tomorrow.
She's fit again.
-Whoo!
-Wonderful.
It wasn't the influenza.
Her illness was a result
of something she ate.
I want him gone.
-Who?
-You know who.
Catherine's convinced
he compromised her food.
-Intentionally?
-Yes, intentionally.
That's ridiculous.
Catherine's always
suspicious of the staff,
and she's allergic
to everything.
Do you remember
those hives in London?
It has nothing to do with...
I understand
you don't like Mr. Monk,
so go ahead and fire him.
Just don't pretend it's for
any other reason than that.
I'm not pretending...
Don't turn...
Good night.
Poor shot.
Good morning, ladies.
Have you, by chance,
seen the paper?
It wasn't delivered today.
Mail didn't come neither.
That is odd.
Where is Mr. Monk?
I would like to speak with him.
Oh, he went to the market
with Mr. Kaan.
They're meant
to pick up Catherine
at the ferry depot as well.
Must say, I've never
been this excited
to see that dour Irish mug.
You and me both.
Have him come see me
when they return.
-Yes, sir.
-[distant gunshot]
FLOYD: Whoo!
[giggling]
You put a little whip cut
at the neck,
and you let it drain
for, like, two days.
Where's Catherine?
The ferry shut down.
They closed the harbor,
the market, the post office.
They closed everything.
We're just prisoners
in paradise.
[gunshot]
It's all right.
Come on, now.
They lifted
the hunting restriction
to make sure
no one goes hungry.
They can't expect us
to kill our own food.
Well, your neighbor just pulled
a buck across the road.
Must have been...
well, it was
200, 250 pounds.
Big old thing.
Absurd.
JULES:
Were are you going?
JAY:
To phone the mayor.
There's been 52 cases
on the island, with 11 deaths.
They're only using private
vessels to transport the sick.
Jay, please.
We don't need
to shelter them, Jules.
[stammering]
Hey, don't worry, kids.
The mayor acted early.
And they're gonna
have this thing
stomped out in no time.
-You can't fire him now.
-Fire who?
-No one.
-Monk.
He has no way
of leaving the island.
The hotel is closed.
Where would he go?
His whereabouts will no longer
be of concern to us.
That's cruel.
Fine.
He's on the first
running ferry out.
[humming]
It's breakfast.
I want oatmeal.
Sorry about that,
Your Majesties.
The market's closed.
I'm just working
with what I got.
You know, we only got
a couple of days' produce left
in that garden.
I do think we should consider
following your neighbor's lead.
[anxious chuckling]
The answer is no.
You wouldn't have to dirty
your own hands.
You just leave the killing
and the carving to me.
There will be no killing,
there will be no carving,
and there will be
no guns in this house.
How about fishing?
I always wanted to learn
how to fish.
-I can show you how to fish.
-I'm sorry. Was I unclear?
There will be no taking
of any life in this house.
He's only trying to help.
Thank you.
That is enough, Mr. Monk.
Eat.
[insects chirping]
[distant clatter, shattering]
[distant laughter]
[laughter nearing]
Jay
Jay, someone's
on the property.
What?
These ones are nice and ripe.
[soft chatter]
-I'll call the sheriff.
-There's no time.
That's all the food we have.
-I'll get the staff.
-No, no.
I'll take care of it.
[laughter]
Make sure you get
all them cabbages there.
-The purple ones behind you.
-Yeah.
Every last vegetable.
Would you look at these?
Always wanted to squeeze
Mrs. Horton's turnips.
-Honk-honk.
-[laughter]
Get off my property.
The police have been called.
Piss off, summer man.
Y'all come down
in the offseason,
bring the damn plague with you,
suck us dry.
I sympathize with your plight.
I sincerely do.
But I am appealing
to your civility. Please.
How about this for civility,
summer man?
My family and I,
we are vegetarian.
You two can hunt
for all the food you need.
What about
our hors d'oeuvres?
[flashbulb booms]
You.
You...
Please.
No!
No.
Give me-- please!
No!
WOMAN:
Ciao, cutie pie.
SHERIFF: They sure
socked you right good,
huh, Mr. Horton?
[imitating gunshots]
Thomas!
We're all here, Sheriff.
I'm the only one who got
a clear look at the thieves.
One was here last week,
canvassing.
Plotting,
I can only assume.
We have your statement,
Mr. Horton.
We'll do what we can.
Actually, I came to discuss
another matter,
one I've been seeing all
the homes on the island about.
Some unpleasant business,
I'm afraid.
Have a seat.
Now, please brace yourselves.
RUTH: Oh...
We haven't been able
to I.D. him,
but we have reason
to believe his killer
fled to Egg Island.
A hobo saw
a fella dump the body
and then trailed him
to the ferry depot.
Described a derelict of a man
in moccasin boots
and a coyote hat.
Any of you note any miscreants
like that lurking around?
-KAAN: No, sir.
-SHERIFF: Nobody out of place?
JAY: No one.
No one suspicious. No.
SHERIFF: Well,
this hobo should be able
to put a face
on our killer for us
as soon as
the ferry's running.
JULES: One bag of rice?
That's it?
That's all
they had left, madam.
-[sighing]
-This is from the Dodsons.
No one would part
with anything else.
How many homes were you able
to visit, Mr. Kaan?
All of them, sir.
All of them, uh...
very good.
Very good.
We'll ration this
and continue our search.
[grandfather clock chiming]
Mama, Molly stole my piece.
Here.
I will get us more food.
I promise.
You said that the last time.
How about a nice, juicy steak
for madame and monsieur?
My God, man!
Get those guns out of the house.
-I ain't gonna use them inside.
-Get them out of here.
Well, Mrs. Horton...
This was your idea?
Our children need to eat.
We all do.
Sir, ain't no one
expecting you to hunt.
You're the ideas man.
All right?
You leave the bloody business
of putting food
on the table to me.
Hm?
I will feed my own family.
JULES:
Jay, don't be absurd.
Oh... rats.
[gentle music]
[gentle music continues]
[gunshot]
[dramatic music]
Your papa, he scouted out
the bedding area,
and he went downwind to that.
Now, why did he go downwind?
So they couldn't smell him.
When the buck come down,
they had this moment.
They locked eyes,
your papa and that buck.
And he took him.
-You did it!
-You saved us!
Our harvest maker.
-Papa.
-Yes?
Tell us how you ran
the buck down the valley.
Ran the buck
down the valley?
You shot the buck
and got us food.
-I didn't...
-Yes, you did.
Don't be modest.
I only did
what had to be done.
That's right.
FLOYD: Aww.
-[anxious chuckle]
-FLOYD: Hey, hey.
Surely we can...
all eat together tonight.
Sweet Lord.
Tastes like
a big mushroom.
But juicier.
Sir, the good Lord's
looking down.
I know He's gonna forgive you
satisfying yourself
in such times of need.
RUTH: He's right.
You ought to try it.
You're gonna
run out of rice soon.
FLOYD: I just want to say
also it feels so good
to be able to rely
upon this man
-to provide for us.
-RUTH: Mm.
I'd like to thank you for
bringing me this meal tonight.
All of us.
We are all thankful.
JULES: I know what a sacrifice
this was for you,
and I'm so grateful.
FLOYD: To our leader...
and our provider.
[clinking]
[triumphant music playing]
Jay... Jay.
[distant splashing]
Do you hear that?
-What?
-[distant whistling]
You don't hear that?
Stop.
Someone's in my pool.
[sighing]
[whistling]
Get the hell out of my pool.
Or what?
You gonna fire me?
If I go, the rest of your staff
is gonna walk with me.
And then what, you'll just be
doing your own laundry
and your own dishes,
watching your own children,
putting your own food
on the table?
Fire me?
Seems to me
you're the ones fired.
You're fired, Jay.
You're fired.
[cigarette sizzles]
How dare you speak to me
like that?
Hey!
Look, there ain't
but one rule in this house,
and that's just stay out
of my hair.
You got that, nancy boy?
[laughing]
Your staffing agency placed
an insurrectionist into my home
where my family sleeps.
Yes. He is corrupting
my entire staff.
No.
Yes, yes.
One governess,
one chauffeur, one cook,
and one Mr. Mahler
on the damn phone now!
[woman speaking indistinctly]
You...
then you'll send
the replacements
once the ferries are
up and running
and you find Mr. Mahler.
His... His cook is
attempting some...
some sort of coup.
[woman speaking indistinctly]
Well, very well.
I'll expect it presently.
[relieved sigh]
Where are you off to?
Oh, honey, the children
and I were hoping
to accompany you
on your hunt.
-We want to see you in action.
-Please, Papa.
-Absolutely not. No.
-Please, Papa.
No.
Taking life of any kind
is never something
to be proud of.
I never swam
in a pool before.
Where are your uniforms?
Off to bag another trophy,
are you, boss?
[phone ringing]
No, you will not be
accompanying me.
-Excuse me.
-[phone ringing]
Hello?
Upton?
Yes. Patch him through.
Upton Sinclair.
-Upton Sinclair?
-Upton Sinclair.
Ssh, ssh.
Yeah.
Tomorrow's cover?
How about I take you
all fishing?
There's quite a lot
of real estate, actually.
We would be delighted
to join you, Mr. Monk.
Shall we go fishing?
-BOTH: Yeah.
-All right.
MOLLY: Are you
a good fisherman?
FLOYD: Good excuse
as any to day-drink.
JAY: Looking forward to it.
Thank you. Bye.
Greatest news.
Got to bend your knees.
You ever throw a ball?
That's the way.
You just haul back
and then you crack your body
like a whip.
I think the fish are too cold
to be hungry, Floyd.
That's not it.
You got to bend your knees...
and whip it.
"There's a bell..."
It's all backwards.
No one believes me.
-JULES: Thomas.
-I can't feel my toes,
and the story's dumb.
Then you can choose another one.
FLOYD:
I got a story for you.
It's about a knight
and a wizard.
Couple of elves get stranded
on this deserted island.
How did they get there?
They can't just appear.
Uh...
A great storm
and terrible shipwreck.
You see, the wizard
brought down the storm
when he said
the magic word.
-"Tempest"?
-Yes.
The elves, they were stranded,
and they didn't know
how to fend for themselves.
They couldn't even make a fire,
not even the elf king.
Then how did he get
to be the king?
-They voted.
-[laughter]
Yes.
I'm humbled to accept
your nomination.
[gunshot]
JULES: And do you want to know
what happened next?
The elf king fed his subjects
to the monster
who kept watch
over the terrified princess.
And also the most beautiful
princess in all the land.
Yes.
To protect her,
the wizard transformed himself
into the swiftest
of all the steeds.
But who will ride him?
Only the bravest
of all the knights.
Look!
Miss, I've got one!
Floyd, I don't know what to do.
Don't panic.
JAY: How thoughtful of you,
Mr. Monk.
[grunting]
[typewriter keys clacking]
[humming "Hail to the Chief"]
What?
This package came
this morning.
It has no postmark on it,
or address or anything.
I'm pretty sure it's a magazine.
I think it said "MacClure."
Sir, your editor's on the line.
I'm sure he wants
to congratulate you.
Ha-hah!
["Stabat Mater"
by Pergolesi playing]
MOLLY: Hey, diddle-diddle.
Queen's in the middle.
Five will get you ten.
Ten will get you 20.
All you got to do is keep
your eye on the little lady.
[laughing]
Here.
Nuh-uh, pay up.
I'll fix us
a couple of gin rickeys,
slip into the evening.
-Don't look at my cards.
-Mm-hm.
Good morning, everyone.
[shattering]
Jay?
Fear not.
I am unscathed.
-[gasping]
-Oh, my God.
-Oh, Jay!
-Papa!
-Mr. Horton.
-Are you okay?
[gasps]
Aah!
FLOYD:
Don't come over here.
Um...
Yeah, this is kind of bad.
Honey, come out of the pool.
Oh, God.
The board demanded
my resignation.
I promise...
you'll find your way back.
I'll never publish again.
Wilson.
He set me up.
Woodrow Wilson?
The APL probably had eyes on me
from the start.
Tipped off McClure's
that I'm out here.
No one knows you're here
but the people in this house.
And none of us would
want you to lose your job.
FLOYD: Come here. I just
have something to tell you.
Come here.
You're fired.
[laughing]
[echoing laughter]
-Jay? Jay.
-[gasping]
-Um...
-What is it?
Nothing, no, nothing--
It's nothing.
I-I... I need
to sort some things out.
FLOYD: Mm!
[grunt]
JULES: Oh, Mr. Monk.
You're hurt.
-Yeah.
-Here. Please.
Let me help.
-May I?
-Yeah.
Don't touch it.
Don't touch it.
Oh, my.
We're gonna have
to get this cleaned up.
Oh, just leave it.
I don't mind the idea
of fine china in my body.
-Makes me feel rich.
-[laughing]
You better have a sip.
This is gonna hurt.
You go first.
-JULES: Phew.
-FLOYD: Is it good?
JULES: Mm-hm.
FLOYD:
You know what you're doing?
Oh, yeah.
That's how I ended up in Paris.
Red Cross training.
I thought
you was writing plays.
I was.
How do you think I convinced
my parents to let me go?
You ready?
I guess so.
[groaning]
I really miss that time.
All we did was drink
and smoke and talk nonsense.
Oh, that's living.
You know, there's nothing
I want more than...
wake up in a strange place
with a nasty hangover
and an empty wallet,
staring into the eyes
of an absolute stranger.
You're a hedonist, Mr. Monk.
-Hm?
-A hedonist.
-Hedonist?
-Mm-hm.
I don't know, maybe.
You ever get lonely
living like that?
I'm king of my own castle.
That's not what I asked.
[chuckling]
Yeah, I get lonely sometimes.
I feel just awful
about all this.
My husband is not
handling himself very well.
Yeah, well, times like this,
it seems to me that...
nature just has
a way of creeping
into the modern world...
and...
brings out the beast in some
and the beauty in others.

[harmonica playing]
[harmonica playing]
[harmonica playing]
[harmonica playing]
[sighing]
[harmonica playing]
MOLLY: Papa?
Am I in trouble?
[gasps]
Jesus, Jay!
He's not a cook.
He set me up.
-Mr. Monk?
-His name...
-Oh, Mr. Monk again?
-...is not Floyd Monk.
Just listen, he--
look at this.
Look what I found
in his room.
You went
through his belongings?
Yes, yes-- yes, I did!
And open it. Look at it.
The only thing
that I see is an old,
degraded photograph
of somebody who looks
-a lot like our cook.
-It is not him.
It is not him.
He-- they sent him here.
They've been keeping tabs
on my every move.
And once I announced
my candidacy, they--
-they made their move.
-Who's "they"?
The APL! The APL!
So you think that
Mr. Monk is an agent
-sent by the president?
-Yes-- sent here to ruin me.
-Think about it.
-No, you think about it.
-I am!
-If he was sent by the president
to ruin you,
why is he still here?
His job is done.
Can you put this back?
Stop it?
Whose side are you on?
The McClure's hippies.
Them raping our garden.
Why are you so blind
to this, Jules?
The only blind one is you.
That hit piece reported
what you always promised to --
the truth, but you lied
because you wanted
to be the hero.
And you're blaming everyone,
but the only person
you should actually blame
is yourself!
Put that back in his room.
[closing drawers]
Mr. Monk!
Mr. Monk!
Mr. Monk!
Yeah.
I thought you was a deer.
Where's your rifle?
Are you gonna tell them
you killed it
with your bare hands?
What are you after?
-Deer.
-Stop the charade.
I know it was you.
Our garden.
McClure's.
I know, I know,
I know it was you.
You're not in your right mind.
You know, if you asked me,
I'd say it was
one of those angry townies
that done it.
Let's end this.
Let's just end it.
You keep quiet,
you pack your things,
and you disappear
from my house now.
You're the man of the house.
JULES: The elf king
and his monster feasted
on the helpless elves.
But they didn't know
that the wizard had
disguised himself
as a steed,
and he'd found himself
a knight brave enough
to ride him.
Is Papa angry because
of something Tom and me did?
No.
No, of course not, darling.
[thunder rumbling]
MOLLY: How does it all end?
JULES: Well, you'll have
to wait until tomorrow,
when we act it out
in costumes and everything.
[squealing]
-Mm!
-Pair of queens?
Look at that-- hah!
[laughing]
Jay!
I'm glad you're all here.
I...
I would like to apologize
for how out of sorts
I've been.
But those dark days are
past me now.
So...
[tired chuckling]
...to the exorcism
and the new, bright light.
Oh, my gosh.
FLOYD:
Mr. Horton, if I may, sir...
Um...
I know I told you
I'd be going, but...
but...
um, and ordinarily,
the wishes of my employer
are... are the most
important thing to me.
But...
right now I'm thinking about
the welfare of this family.
And I think they need to know
the truth is that
you and I have had a kind of...
what is it, like
a kind of agreement, right?
Where I do the hunting,
and you take credit for it.
-It's-- right?
-Is that true?
-But--
-He's lying!
-And he asked me to leave.
-Get out of my house!
This family has come to mean
a lot to me, and he...
Hey! Oh-- yeah, okay.
He offered me $20
to just disappear.
Only 20 bucks?
Get out of my house!
Let's take a vote.
You want me to leave?
-Take a vote.
-Get out of my house!
-Let's just take a vote.
-This is not a democracy!
-This is my home!
-Jay-- Jay!
-Jay, this is my house, too.
-Get out!
And Mr. Monk stays.
Stay...
[groaning]
[groaning]
[muttering gibberish]
[sighing]
No hard feelings, right?
Come on.
-[roaring]
-Oh, oh!
KAAN:
Mr. Horton!
FLOYD:
Hey, hey-hey-hey-hey, hey!
Whoa!
[overlapping shouts]
I have him!
[groaning]
You need to sober up.
And eat something!
Get some sleep!
["Liebestraum No. 3"
by Liszt playing]
[thunder crashing, rumbling]

[thunder rumbling]
[gagging]
[phone ringing]
Hello?
Mr. Mahler.
No.
No, Mr. Mahler,
there was no mistake. Yes.
Your so-called chef
most certainly arrived
to my house and has
been tormenting me ever since.
He...
Floyd Monk is dead?
Then who is this man
at my house?
He killed him.
I'm getting the sheriff now.
-[tapping phone]
-[thunder crashes]
[panting]
[distant engine rumbling]
[hollering indistinctly]
[car horn honking]
MAN: Get out of the road.
[crows cawing]
Monk...
[coughing]
JULES: Jay, you need to rest.
He killed--
He's not Floyd Monk.
He murdered him.
He murdered...
FLOYD: I wouldn't get
too close, ma'am.
[groaning]
Jay, you may have
been exposed.
There's no more rice left.
There's only meat.
Now, you need to eat,
or we could lose you.
[Jules gasping]
Oh, my goodness-- Jay!
He's lost his mind.
You need to take care
of your mind, all right?
-Aah!
-We should get him to the bed.
I will.
You don't worry, okay?
No-- Julie!
[door opens, closes]
I hear you've been
asking around about me.
What you want
to know, boy? Hm?
Monk.
You killed Floyd Monk.
No, no, no, I beg you.
-Please, please.
-Okay, that's...
I was just kidding around.
I'm just kidding you.
Hey, hey, I'm just kidding you.
[sobbing]
What? Why?
Look at me.
I was just messing around
with you.
I didn't kill anybody.
But Monk is dead.
Well, bless him--
bless him, he is.
But I didn't kill him.
You did.
Let me tell you.
So, he come over here
from Dublin on a ship
with nothing
but the boots on his feet.
Ten years worked
the Bowery in a mess hall
just to buy a small sliver
of that bar.
When them closures come along,
your closures,
they took it all away.
It broke his spirit.
[gunshot]
You were...
You were his partner?
Yeah, so when
this gig come along,
I figure
I could take his place.
But I ain't no bogeyman.
I'm just another fella
you put out of work.
And so you come...
and try to take
everything away from me --
my family, my home,
my livelihood.
I just come here for a job.
Couple of weeks ago, I was
just a sorry son of a bitch.
And here I am, working for you,
of all people.
Sometimes I think
that this plague...
I think it was sent
from the Lord above,
just to level
the playing field.
'Cause ain't none of this
belongs to you.
That swimming pool.
You know what's underneath
that swimming pool?
An entire civilization.
And you know
what's underneath that?
Another one. And you know
what's underneath that?
A saber-toothed tiger.
So, ain't none of this
belongs to anyone.
[chuckle]
None of this is going to last.
You understand that, right?
These lights will
snap back on.
The ferries will run again.
Stores will reopen.
Civilization will return.
This fantasy will end.
And then where will you be?
[fake sobbing]
Oh...
[chuckling]
Okay.
[spits]
Allow me to show you
to your new quarters, boss.
Oh!
You better hope civilization
comes back soon.
You ain't cut out
for this here world.
Enjoy your succor.
[orchestral music]
[imitating horse nickering]
[soft laughter]
The knight and his steed
came upon
the monster's lair.
It was here
where the evil elf king
kept the princess
as prisoner.
Help me! Help me!
I'm behind bars!
The monster saw that the knight
was fearless, and he fled.
[death gurgle]
With the monster slain,
the evil elf king's
evil reign had ended!
[all cheering]
And the noble steed
revealed himself
as the great wizard
he truly was.
Uncle Floyd, we won!
We're free!
[all cheering]
We're free!
Ha-ha!
-[whooping]
-[cheering]
We're free!
-[whooping]
-[cheering]
[distant cheering]
We're free!
[distant cheering]
TOM: Uncle Floyd!
MOLLY: We did it!
-TOM: Uncle Floyd!
-[whimpering]
[harmonica playing]
Ssh, ssh.
[harmonica playing]
[chuckling]
Whew.
[chuckling]
[straining]
It's a...
[stirring strings playing]
[straining]
[thud]
[opera singer crooning]


[grunting]
[laughter]
[groaning, soft chatter]
[laughing]
[lights buzz]
[doorbell ringing]
Who's there?
Didn't mean to startle you,
Mrs. Horton.
-Sheriff?
-With the phone lines out,
I'm Egg Island's
new town crier.
-Oh.
-Well, I'm happy to report
that tomorrow morning,
some town stores will be
permitted to reopen.
Main dock and ferry, too.
JULES: Is it safe?
SHERIFF: The island hasn't seen
a new case for days.
Matters also improving
in the city.
I reckon the worst of this thing
has moved past our parts.
JULES: That's wonderful news.
Sheriff, my husband,
he's malnourished.
He needs to see a doctor.
SHERIFF: I'll be glad
to give him a lift.
Just wait right there.
I'll be down in a moment.
[soft chuckle]
I guess I'll pack my things.
[sighing]
JULES: He's been
in the servants' quarters.
SHERIFF: Won't he be glad
to learn we caught up
with those garden thieves.
Couple of locals
acting out some vendetta
against the summer folks.
[harmonica playing]
[chuckling]
-Well...
-[gunshot]
[groaning]
[gunshot]
[thud]
[dramatic orchestra]
[distant screams]
TOM: Mama!
JULES:
Get the children and go.
SHERIFF: Mr. Horton, lay down
the weapon and surrender.
Mr. Horton!
Mr. Horton,
you need to come out now,
or I will need to come in.
Know that I am armed.
Good evening, Sheriff.
I am deeply relieved
to see you.
That is the man you're after.
He murdered a cook
named Floyd Monk,
stole his identity,
invaded my home,
and tried to kill me.
[birds chirping]
These have been
the most trying of times
not only for the people
of this nation,
but also for my family.
They may as well have
spit in our faces,
expecting us
to keep working here.
And for old wages, no less.
After all we've been
through together.
And have done for him.
Domos!
I guess you were right,
Genghis.
You either have servants,
or you are one.
JAY: As we, the people,
warred against
the scourge from Spain,
I was fighting a plague
native to our own shores --
this administration
and their party of deceit.
These elitist politicians
will stoop to any depth
to suppress the rights
of women and immigrants,
seeking only their fair share
of the American pie.
They even sent
one of their thugs into my home
to destroy me.
But I defended my land,
just as you defended yours.
Together, your voices
will be heard.
The chorus of the working man
will deliver us a victory.
I, J.C. Horton,
am running for governor
of this great state.
[distant cheering and applause]
What are you hiding?
It's a card
me and my classmates
-made for you...
-Oh...
...to say thanks
for the services you did.
Thank you so much, my dear.
Thank you.
You're famouser
than Charlie Chaplin!
No saying how many more lives
that terrorist would have taken
had it not been
for your bravery, sir.
Some types are simply
beyond saving.
Well, the important thing is
that we're all here
together and safe.
Ma'am.
Sorry to disturb, but I found
something in his old room.
Thank you.
[gunshot]
Don't tell me the National
Woman's Party canceled again.
He was innocent.
There was nothing innocent
about that man.
What was his crime?
[paper rustling]
We are back.
Everything... is back.
What does that say?
"Grateful."
TOM: My favorite.
We're back.
[orchestral music]





["Me and My Gal" playing
on record player]
What a beautiful day
(What a beautiful day)
For a wedding in May
(For a wedding in May)
See the people all stare
(Just see them stare)
At the lovable pair
(At the lovable pair)
She's a beacon of joy
(She's a beacon of joy)
He's the luckiest boy
(He's the luckiest boy)
In his wedding array
(In his wedding array)
Hear him smilingly say
(What does he say?)
The bells are ringing
For me and my gal
(I love to hear...)
The birds are singing
For me and my gal
(For me and my gal)
Everybody's been knowing
To a wedding they're going
And for weeks
they've been sewing
Every Susie and Sal
They're congregating
(At the gate, at the gate)
For me and my gal
(Here comes the bride)
The parson's waiting
(At the gate, at the gate)
For me and my gal
And sometime I'm gonna
build a little home or two
For three or four or more
In Loveland
For me and my gal
See the relatives there
(See the relatives there)
Looking over the pair
(Looking over the pair)
They can tell at a glance
(They can tell at a glance)
It's a loving romance
(It's a loving romance)
It's a wonderful sight
(It's a wonderful sight)
As the families unite
(As the families unite)
Gee, it makes the boy proud
(That boy feels proud)
As he says to the crowd
(Says to the crowd)
The bells are ringing
For me and my gal
(I love to hear...)
The birds are singing
For me and my gal
(For me and my gal)
Everybody's been knowing
To a wedding
they're going
And for weeks
they've been sewing
Every Susie and Sal
They're congregating
(At the gate, at the gate)
For me and my gal
(Here comes the bride)
The parson's waiting
(Have him wait, have him wait)
For me and my gal
And sometime I'm gonna
build a little home or two
For three or four or more
In Loveland
For me and my gal
[record player fuzz]