Crazy Love (1987) Movie Script
Ma?
Why'd you marry Dad?
He was one of my brother's friends;
one day he just asked me
That's it?
That's it
Nothing else happened?
Really?
No
I don't believe you.
You're leaving something out
- Like what?
- He had to fight for you
- He was a fighter, all right
- And he kidnapped you
Didn't he?
Yes
Then what happened?
Then he took me to a hut
up in the mountains
I was a prisoner there
for three days
Were you scared?
Oh, Yes.
He was so strong
Then?
Then he took me
to the top of the mountain
To show me the world
He said:
All that belongs to you and me
And then he kissed me so hard,
I can still feel it
Just like a film
Better... Much better
And the tits of Mary Cobb
have each one got a knob
To play with,
to play with...
I got a present...
From the boys at work
I got something, too
What?
Later
So?
She's still got all her clothes on
She's a princess.
They always dress in white
And the prince had to fight
for her first
Then he was allowed to marry her
You believe that crap?
Yes
Want to know
why grown-ups get married?
So they can fuck
You know what that is, fucking?
Not really
Don't know much, do you?
- That's what grown-ups do?
- If they're not fighting
Your parents do it, too
Look
That's your mother
And that's your father
And that's fucking
Like to try it?
Listen
To fuck well,
you have to learn to kiss well
I know how to kiss
With your tongue?
That's kissing...
And here's where you learn it
Don't worry.
I've scored here loads of times
You're lucky. That's Kathy,
she's the hottest of them all
Go and sit next to her,
or someone else will get her
- Look at her teeth!
- Then look at her legs
Don't tell me
you blew a chance like that!
I didn't know what to do
And now, ladies and gentlemen!
The most beautiful women in the world
Step right up! Step right up!
And let me introduce you
to Tiger Rita!
And right here the one and only
Eva Pavlova, the terror of Warsaw!
See their breasts?
They're topped with nipples
When you rub them,
they get stiff
And when they get stiff,
you know you're in business. Got it?
Here, this'll make you feel better
I never saw a woman like that before
- Beautiful...
- No, hot!
If anyone can teach you,
it's her...
What a woman!
Come on. Now you'll see
what fucking is
Mummy! Can we go?
- Play some more. Here
- No...
The ginger one is Theo.
He's in my class
Didn't know his mother was like that
- Can I come?
- Of course not...
Bloody hell!
That ginger bastard
I thought they were really
going to do it
Right in front of us
That'd have been worth seeing
Know where Ginger lives?
Yes, but I've never been there
Then it's time we went there to play
Tomorrow
You sure it's here?
Yes
What a woman
Theo?
I never saw a woman
like that before
- I'm horny as a rabbit
- Me, too
I need to cool down
That's better
I need some water too
This may be your big day, kid
I can't
Don't be scared.
She's blind drunk
She won't wake up
What shall I do?
Remember what that bloke
at the fair did to her?
Do the same as him
Go on
- She smells good
- Because she's horny
Lie down on top of her.
Lie down
I still haven't done it
I'll show you something
that'll make you feel better
Watch now
But make sure
you don't do it too often
You might get a crooked back
Or go crazy
Ma, dad didn't kidnap you, did he?
No
Why did you lie to me?
Because you're so young
Everything is ugly
No. There are many beautiful things
in life, son
Go to sleep now
- You must be nervous
- Why's that?
It's your last day at school
I can still remember
my last day at school
The school dance
The girls were sweating.
And not just from dancing...
- Do you use the cream I gave you?
- Every day, but it doesn't help much
- You must be patient
- I've been patient for two years
lt'll go away eventually
And if you don't scratch
you won't have any scars
Here, try this.
And come back next week
So what do you want to be,
later?
Not a doctor, for sure
Lisa Velani
I'll fuck her tonight
or my name's Harry Frankenstein
Harry Voss
Harry Voss
- Didn't dare show himself, huh?
- With that ugly spotty mug of his...
Dreaming again?
You think too much
lt'll give you a headache
Your diploma
Wondered if you wanted
to come to the school dance
- Why you asking me?
- Cos I don't want to go on my own
And I like to be the best looking
I don't like parties.
Too many people
- Then we'll go somewhere else
- Where?
Where there's no people
What you doing?
Let the wind carry my message.
In my soul there is a song
She's the answer to all my problems
Though her heart doesn't know it yet
- I didn't know you were a poet
- It's easy when you're in love
Know who I wrote that for?
Read the first letter of each line
I love her... I love them all,
but they aren't interested in me
So come to the dance
and you can read it to her
Are you nuts?
I can't even talk to her
It's easy when you're in love
You think this is what women
dream of?
You don't know women.
They can look right through men
When Lisa looks at you,
she won't see your spots...
she'll see the poet in your eyes
If you don't do it tonight
you never will
Congratulations!
The Future Beckons
See her anywhere?
- Hello Marina
- Hello, handsome
- Will you dance with me later?
- Of course
Don't forget, eh?
Friend of mine
Hey, she's on her own
- What should I do?
- Ask her to dance
- She doesn't dance
- Of course she dances. Go on
- OK, it's fixed
- What is?
You'll see. Come on
- There she is
- Who is?
Marina.
I made a date with her
I'll go first. Then we'll swap
- But I don't know her
- That doesn't matter
But I don't feel anything for her
That won't stop you doing it
She won't want me
She's not like Lisa.
Marina likes doing it... with everyone
She knows you're part of the deal
- Really?
- Yes. I'll be quick, OK?
I'll need some more soon
You can have more right now
Have you taken a pill?
No, but I've got a friend.
He's waiting outside
Do I know him?
He's a sensitive boy. A poet
A poet?
- All right?
- Well, if you can't do it
Your turn
- You sure she wants me?
- Yes, she's ready for you
Come on, little poet.
I'm getting cold
Sorry
Finished already?
Look, Frankenstein.
If you're trying to be funny...
- Incredible! You did it
- Yes, with shit paper
Any whisky left?
- In the car
- Take me home
Here, let me
Go on
Drive on!
I live right there
But I can't make it
Can't you carry me in?
I really can't make it
Is that yours?
It's my poem
Where did you get it?
On a train
You can keep it.
I don't need it anymore
Have a heart,
carry me indoors
I can hear it beating...
So you have got one
- Bill!
- Harry!
- Where have you been?
- Vacation
For how long?
Three months in prison,
eight months in jail...
And how are you?
I'm thirsty... and broke
Silence.
Hospital
I'm tired
I live nearby.
I'm looking after someone's house
Someone?
Who I don't know
and who doesn't know me
- Dare we?
- For old times' sake
- We never dared before
- You never dared!
Let me do it
Nice place
So we did it
It weighed less than I thought
It was mellow
He's still warm
She's dead
But she's alive
No Harry...
I wouldn't do that
Best woman I ever had
You only ever meet one like that
We'd better bury her
or we'll get into trouble
She's too beautiful to bury
Where are we going?
To a wedding
And do you take
as your lawful wedded husband
Harry Voss
For better and for worse
Until...
...death do you part
Until death do you part
Why'd you marry Dad?
He was one of my brother's friends;
one day he just asked me
That's it?
That's it
Nothing else happened?
Really?
No
I don't believe you.
You're leaving something out
- Like what?
- He had to fight for you
- He was a fighter, all right
- And he kidnapped you
Didn't he?
Yes
Then what happened?
Then he took me to a hut
up in the mountains
I was a prisoner there
for three days
Were you scared?
Oh, Yes.
He was so strong
Then?
Then he took me
to the top of the mountain
To show me the world
He said:
All that belongs to you and me
And then he kissed me so hard,
I can still feel it
Just like a film
Better... Much better
And the tits of Mary Cobb
have each one got a knob
To play with,
to play with...
I got a present...
From the boys at work
I got something, too
What?
Later
So?
She's still got all her clothes on
She's a princess.
They always dress in white
And the prince had to fight
for her first
Then he was allowed to marry her
You believe that crap?
Yes
Want to know
why grown-ups get married?
So they can fuck
You know what that is, fucking?
Not really
Don't know much, do you?
- That's what grown-ups do?
- If they're not fighting
Your parents do it, too
Look
That's your mother
And that's your father
And that's fucking
Like to try it?
Listen
To fuck well,
you have to learn to kiss well
I know how to kiss
With your tongue?
That's kissing...
And here's where you learn it
Don't worry.
I've scored here loads of times
You're lucky. That's Kathy,
she's the hottest of them all
Go and sit next to her,
or someone else will get her
- Look at her teeth!
- Then look at her legs
Don't tell me
you blew a chance like that!
I didn't know what to do
And now, ladies and gentlemen!
The most beautiful women in the world
Step right up! Step right up!
And let me introduce you
to Tiger Rita!
And right here the one and only
Eva Pavlova, the terror of Warsaw!
See their breasts?
They're topped with nipples
When you rub them,
they get stiff
And when they get stiff,
you know you're in business. Got it?
Here, this'll make you feel better
I never saw a woman like that before
- Beautiful...
- No, hot!
If anyone can teach you,
it's her...
What a woman!
Come on. Now you'll see
what fucking is
Mummy! Can we go?
- Play some more. Here
- No...
The ginger one is Theo.
He's in my class
Didn't know his mother was like that
- Can I come?
- Of course not...
Bloody hell!
That ginger bastard
I thought they were really
going to do it
Right in front of us
That'd have been worth seeing
Know where Ginger lives?
Yes, but I've never been there
Then it's time we went there to play
Tomorrow
You sure it's here?
Yes
What a woman
Theo?
I never saw a woman
like that before
- I'm horny as a rabbit
- Me, too
I need to cool down
That's better
I need some water too
This may be your big day, kid
I can't
Don't be scared.
She's blind drunk
She won't wake up
What shall I do?
Remember what that bloke
at the fair did to her?
Do the same as him
Go on
- She smells good
- Because she's horny
Lie down on top of her.
Lie down
I still haven't done it
I'll show you something
that'll make you feel better
Watch now
But make sure
you don't do it too often
You might get a crooked back
Or go crazy
Ma, dad didn't kidnap you, did he?
No
Why did you lie to me?
Because you're so young
Everything is ugly
No. There are many beautiful things
in life, son
Go to sleep now
- You must be nervous
- Why's that?
It's your last day at school
I can still remember
my last day at school
The school dance
The girls were sweating.
And not just from dancing...
- Do you use the cream I gave you?
- Every day, but it doesn't help much
- You must be patient
- I've been patient for two years
lt'll go away eventually
And if you don't scratch
you won't have any scars
Here, try this.
And come back next week
So what do you want to be,
later?
Not a doctor, for sure
Lisa Velani
I'll fuck her tonight
or my name's Harry Frankenstein
Harry Voss
Harry Voss
- Didn't dare show himself, huh?
- With that ugly spotty mug of his...
Dreaming again?
You think too much
lt'll give you a headache
Your diploma
Wondered if you wanted
to come to the school dance
- Why you asking me?
- Cos I don't want to go on my own
And I like to be the best looking
I don't like parties.
Too many people
- Then we'll go somewhere else
- Where?
Where there's no people
What you doing?
Let the wind carry my message.
In my soul there is a song
She's the answer to all my problems
Though her heart doesn't know it yet
- I didn't know you were a poet
- It's easy when you're in love
Know who I wrote that for?
Read the first letter of each line
I love her... I love them all,
but they aren't interested in me
So come to the dance
and you can read it to her
Are you nuts?
I can't even talk to her
It's easy when you're in love
You think this is what women
dream of?
You don't know women.
They can look right through men
When Lisa looks at you,
she won't see your spots...
she'll see the poet in your eyes
If you don't do it tonight
you never will
Congratulations!
The Future Beckons
See her anywhere?
- Hello Marina
- Hello, handsome
- Will you dance with me later?
- Of course
Don't forget, eh?
Friend of mine
Hey, she's on her own
- What should I do?
- Ask her to dance
- She doesn't dance
- Of course she dances. Go on
- OK, it's fixed
- What is?
You'll see. Come on
- There she is
- Who is?
Marina.
I made a date with her
I'll go first. Then we'll swap
- But I don't know her
- That doesn't matter
But I don't feel anything for her
That won't stop you doing it
She won't want me
She's not like Lisa.
Marina likes doing it... with everyone
She knows you're part of the deal
- Really?
- Yes. I'll be quick, OK?
I'll need some more soon
You can have more right now
Have you taken a pill?
No, but I've got a friend.
He's waiting outside
Do I know him?
He's a sensitive boy. A poet
A poet?
- All right?
- Well, if you can't do it
Your turn
- You sure she wants me?
- Yes, she's ready for you
Come on, little poet.
I'm getting cold
Sorry
Finished already?
Look, Frankenstein.
If you're trying to be funny...
- Incredible! You did it
- Yes, with shit paper
Any whisky left?
- In the car
- Take me home
Here, let me
Go on
Drive on!
I live right there
But I can't make it
Can't you carry me in?
I really can't make it
Is that yours?
It's my poem
Where did you get it?
On a train
You can keep it.
I don't need it anymore
Have a heart,
carry me indoors
I can hear it beating...
So you have got one
- Bill!
- Harry!
- Where have you been?
- Vacation
For how long?
Three months in prison,
eight months in jail...
And how are you?
I'm thirsty... and broke
Silence.
Hospital
I'm tired
I live nearby.
I'm looking after someone's house
Someone?
Who I don't know
and who doesn't know me
- Dare we?
- For old times' sake
- We never dared before
- You never dared!
Let me do it
Nice place
So we did it
It weighed less than I thought
It was mellow
He's still warm
She's dead
But she's alive
No Harry...
I wouldn't do that
Best woman I ever had
You only ever meet one like that
We'd better bury her
or we'll get into trouble
She's too beautiful to bury
Where are we going?
To a wedding
And do you take
as your lawful wedded husband
Harry Voss
For better and for worse
Until...
...death do you part
Until death do you part