Crazy on the Outside (2010) Movie Script

[Buzzer Sounds]
[Door Slides, Clicks]
['70s Folk Rock]
[Inmates Chattering]
Sunshine, go away today
I don't feel much like dancin'
Some man's gone
e's tried
o run my life
[Grunts]
He don't know what he's askin'
When he tells me
I better get in line
I can't hear what he's sayin'
When I grow up
I'm gonna make it mine
These ain't dues
I been payin'
[Mutters, Grunts]
Well, how much does it cost
I'll buy it
he time is all we've lost
I'll try it
And he can't even run
his own life
I'll be damned
if he'll run mine
Sunshine
Sunshine, go away today
I don't feel much like dancin'
[Sighs]
I can't believe you died.
Some man's gone
He's tried to run my life
He don't know what he's askin'
Zelda? ime to go.
Workin' starts
to make me wonder where
he fruits of what I do are goin'
[Arguing, Indistinct]
He says, in love and war all is fair
But he's got cards he ain't showin'
Rot in hell, butt muncher.
He must be talking to you.
[Man]
Good luck, ommy.
Thanks, J.J.
Don't leave, ommy.
I love you.
Again, that's for you.
Hey, ommy,
don't forget about Christy.
Yeah?
- ey. ey! Knock it off!
- I'll be damned if he'll run mine
Sunshine
Sunshine, come on back
another day
his is as far as I go.
Well, I'm not leaving
if you're not leaving.
[Chuckling]
his old world
she's gonna turn around
Brand-new bells will be ringin'
[Continues]
[Ends]
[Whistling Softly]
ey, man.
Where the hell's
my stupid brother?
A little late picking you up?
his guy's late at everything-
every freakin' thing.
Guy did one thing early
his whole life.
Drove off with the getaway car.
[rain Passing In Distance]
You know, not my sister.
She's a real saint.
I'm surprised
she's not here now.
One of those, huh?
My brother,
late all the time.
his guy, he would be late
for his own funeral.
I'm tellin' ya, late, late-
[Horn Honking]
ey, there he is.
[Resumes]
ey, Chooch.
Workin' starts
to make me wonder where
he fruits of what I do are goin'
[Tires Squeal]
He says, in love and war
all is fair
But he's got cards he ain't showin'
Well, how much does it cost
I'll buy it
he time is all we've lost
I'll try it
And he can't even run
his own life
I'll be damned
if he'll run mine
Sunshine
Sunshine, come on back
Another day
[Vehicle Horn Honks]
I promise you I'll be singin'
his old world
she's gonna turn around
Brand-new bells will be ringin'
[Woman]
Hi.
[Ends]
ou know how long
I was waiting out there?
ommy, it was awful.
eah, awful, waiting two
and a half hours in the hot sun.
I was held up, okay?
I mean, I stopped
at this gas station just to pee.
And they had a gun.
his happened just now?
I thought they were gonna kill me.
I keep- Sorry I'm late.
Wow. Are you all right?
I don't want to talk about it. I'm-
I'm just so happy to see you.
[Chuckles]
Yeah, me too.
- It's good to be out.
- [orn Honking]
- [ires Squealing]
- Whoa!
Dickhead.
Where'd you learn
how to do that?
Carpool.
All right, look.
I wasn't held up, okay?
I didn't stop at a gas station
to pee. I just-
I was at Cooper's soccer game.
Soccer.
Well, how did he do?
I mean, how did he play?
hey have Cooper at halfback.
What he really wants to be is a winger.
And then Emily Janison brought
these great low-fat crunch cakes,
and we all got to laughing
and lost track of time, you know.
Yes, I know how that is-
like, how about three long-ass hours
waiting outside a prison-
ou're my brother.
I love you, so I lied.
I just want everyone to be happy.
ou want a Life Saver?
I have a red one for you.
[ommy]
Listen, Vik. I just want
to go home, take a hot shower,
do whatever I can to ease
the huge amount of stress
and tension that I'm feeling, okay?
Is that too much
to ask?
Hey, Tic Tac?
[Lmpact]
[Tires Screech]
And that's not
really helping, Vik.
[ires Screech]
Vik!
Damn, Vik.
What?
- Welcome home.
- Is Ed gonna be here?
Well, he is my husband,
and it is his house.
No, I mean, is- is he all right
with me staying here?
Of course.
Why would you even ask?
Because he hates me, Vik.
What did Mom always say?
"ate is for Hitler."
Now come on.
ou are staying with us
till you're back on your feet.
Let's go.
Grammy is busting.
Is she excited
I'm finally out, huh?
Well-
"Well"?
[Mouthing Words]
"Well"?
ey, Vik.
I mean, well what?
om, we never exactly
told her you were in prison.
er heart.
We were too afraid.
I know about her heart.
So where have I been
for three years?
Welcome home from France!
Ah. Oh.
[Mutters]
[Both Chuckle]
Mmm.
[Chuckles]
Come.
Bonjour, Tom.
Hey, Ed.
Mmm. I missed you.
[Both Breathe Deeply]
[Sighs]
ey, Coop.
Good to see you, man.
- Uh- [Clears hroat]
- Alex?
Cooper, Alex, don't you have
something to say to your uncle?
What?
Bonjour, Uncle Tommy.
- Oh. B-Bon- "Bonjours," U-Uncle ommy.
- hanks. hat's really sweet.
"Benvenu eh" Encino
- "Benveenu," uh, "eh" En-ncino.
- Okay.
All right.
C-Can we go, Mom?
ey.
ey, what's with the kids?
Well, they're
a little nervous, om.
hey've never been
around anybody
who's actually been to France.
[Grandmother]
Yes, he's so international,
our Tommy.
Notre Tom.
e's a bon vivant, you know.
- No.
- Grandma's been taking
French lessons from CDs.
- Pour trois ans.
- "For three years."
out pour cette jour.
"All for this day."
She won't use headphones,
so I've gotten pretty good too.
Oh, your French
is very good.
- Ou sont tes valises?
- What?
[Snickers]
[Sighs]
She wants to know
where your bags are.
Yeah, om. I mean,
you must've brought more than
that one little box back from... France.
- France.
- We were watching Gigi.
I chose France.
er heart?
I couldn't upset her.
Upset someone once in a while.
I'm taking your car.
We're having meat loaf. 6:30.
I don't wanna wait
a whole lot longer for dinner.
e'll be back soon.
ou be nice.
Fine, fine.
Put that back.
[Sighs]
Where the hell is he?
I wanna eat.
Choo-choo ddie
needs some coal in the boiler.
e probably drove down
to that abandoned railroad bridge
where he and Christy used to go.
Has he been asking
about her?
No.
ope he doesn't. You know,
maybe just driving down there
will make him feel better.
I'm glad a lot of his favorite places
haven't changed much.
Hmm.
Well, that one has.
hey started using that bridge
again last spring.
[Yelling]
[Horn Blaring]
[Whistling]
[Whistling Ends]
ey, can I go to Justin's
after dinner?
What about homework?
I did all my math.
I have a little science,
but I can totally do it after.
[Chuckling]
Alex, less bread
and more meat, please.
[Alex]
Mom, you know I don't like-
[Viki] I know, but-
[Quietly]
Great. ake it back home-
hat's weird.
Huh?
Tommy has jet lag, and-
Allow me. ou see, kids,
many people who spend
a year or more in France
get very protective of their food,
and they often wrap it up
and take it back to their-
- Rooms.
- Rooms.
You eat it however
or wherever you want.
Nah. You know what?
Why don't I just eat it right here?
ou're right.
What am I waitin' for?
Speaking of France, Tom,
you think you'll be going back
there anytime soon?
- What do you mean?
- Well, it's just that,
statistically speaking,
people who go to France
and then get out of France...
usually end up back
in France.
- [Grandmother Screams]
- [Vehicle Approaching]
- [Horn onks, ires Screech]
- re we expecting anyone?
- [Engine Revving]
- ou stay. I'll go.
Good.
[Man, In Distance]
Hey, Tommy! Tommy!
[Revving Continues]
L-
l-I'm gonna go
take a look at that.
Excuse me for a minute.
I'll be right back.
[Viki] Get the hell out of here,
you pompous, two-bit-
[Viki, Man Continue rguing]
- s handsome as ever, Viki.
- ou stay away from my brother,
you cockroach!
[Revving Continues]
[Arguing Continues]
Slimemobile.
You're a big man, tough guy-
Hey! Hey, don't kick my car!
- [rguing Continues]
- Oh, yeah.
hat's what I'm talkin' about.
You let him take the rap
and go to prison.
ow's your bald-headed
little bastard husband?
- Get outta here before
I kick your car to pieces!
- [Man Laughs] Tommy!
[Horn onks]
[Car Departs]
[Folk Guitars Strumming]
- [Women Singing In French]
- uh.
- Grandma's little project.
- [Continues]
[Scoffs] Listen, Vik.
hat was Gray you were
talking to out front, wasn't it?
I sprayed pine in here.
Do you like it?
Viki. Viki, I can handle Gray.
I don't want him around
this house, and I don't
want him around you.
I'm out. I'm happy.
I'm not gonna do anything stupid.
I don't want
to lose you again.
You're not gonna lose me again.
I promise.
You're probably tired.
[Sighs]
Good night.
Good night.
mm.
Boy, it'd be so much easier
if you were here.
Christy?
Yeah.
I miss her. I just do.
I know, honey.
It was awful, and it was tragic.
But this is a brand-new chapter.
Listen, uh, it probably won't
come up, but you should know
that while you were in France-
an artist in residence
at the Louvre-
you got engaged.
ow nice for me.
o a beautiful young Parisian
named Simone...
who can't be with you
because she's training...
to be an astronaut
with the French space program.
- ow nice for her.
- Mom and Dad
would have loved her-
I mean, if they were alive
and she was real.
Good night.
[Man On P.A.]
Line 33, downtown L.A.
[Elevator Bell Dings]
Hey, kid.
Yeah?
Where's the probation
department?
Down the hall.
What'd you do?
How would you feel if I asked
you a question like that?
Fine.
I didn't do anything.
Whoops.
Yeah, well, whose pee
do they think it is?
homas Zelda.
Nice talking to you.
[Sighs, Chuckles]
Sorry for staring,
but you're not quite
what I expected...
when the word
"probation officer" popped up.
Oh. Well, don't even
go down that road,
'cause I'll grind your nuts
and send them back to you
in a pepper shaker.
hat's more like it.
- Hey, Mom.
- Hey, buddy.
Uh, wait for me downstairs
in the cafeteria.
Okay, Mom.
[Lmitates Gunshot Softly]
homas Zelda.
All right, let's see.
An impressive list ofjuvies,
a couple of grand theft autos,
suspended, and then-
oh, and then the big vacation:
interstate fraud and video piracy.
Yeah. Well, I gave up
fresh fruits and vegetables
for three years...
so people in China could enjoy
Lars and the Real Girl.
Um, I want to get my son home,
so let me cut to the chase.
You do what I say, we meet once
a week, keep your nose clean,
and we won't have any trouble.
You'II be able to eat
off my nose.
Go to 1222 Victory...
and see Mr. Geissman.
I've lined up a job for you.
Um,
I don't need a job.
My dad had an industrial paint business,
and I want to start that up again.
And I want to be a ballerina.
[Paper ears]
Go.
Listen. You've probably
heard this a million times,
but I'm not like the other guys
that walk in here.
I'm totally, 100%o committed
to turning my life around.
And I know just how to do it.
I have all his old contacts,
and I'll start just the way he did-
by painting houses.
Let me be
your biggest success story.
I can do this.
Arr! Uh, welcome
to Pirate Burger, matey.
You gotta get
the whole pirate thing.
Really grind the "R."
Arr-r-r!
All right.
Arr.
Yeah.
We're gonna start you
in the back,
so let me get this vest-
Step one.
Pour the frozen potatoes
into the basket.
But you can't- I repeat, you cannot
lower the baskets into the oil...
till the green light comes on.
hen what?
That's it.
e's teachin' him the fryer
on the first day.
You wanna give it a try?
Could I?
[Man #2]
Oh, this guy's
gonna get burned.
Just like you
got burned.
[Manager] Yep, yep.
[Buzzer Sounds]
Light's not gettin; any greener,
Seaman.
- [ommy Grunts]
- [Screaming]
[Man #2]
Yeah. Drop it in the fryer,
watch the bubbles-
[Indistinct]
[Both Laugh]
[Chuckles]
ere, a head of lettuce
comin' at ya.
Not everyone picks
this up so fast.
Oh, you; re
a Major League pitcher now?
- Yeah, you throw
that lettuce at me-
- You're gonna do great.
[Man #2]
Don't start. Don't-
Don't even think about it.
[Both Continue Arguing,
Indistinct]
Where the hell is he?
I wanna eat.
It's his first day on the job.
Maybe he had to work late.
Yeah, probably had
some high-level meeting
about the milk shake machine.
I changed your sister's diapers
for 11 months after the accident.
Did I complain once?
Cut him some slack.
Okay. It's all right.
We'll wait.
God, I love the way
that shirt pulls in the front.
[Man On P.A.]
Line 29, Encino.
Of course my sister
never went to France.
What?
What? Nothing.
I think you said something.
No, just, I like those pants.
Shut up,
and you won't get hurt!
Where are we going?
[Muffled Protesting]
[ommy, Muffled]
Ow! My knee!
Where are we going?
[ommy, Muffled]
Hey, let go of me!
Where are we going?
Keep moving and shut up.
[ommy]
Come on!
Take the thing off my head.
Easy. Just take this off.
I haven't got- What-
- Surprise!
- [Laughing]
- Jesus, Gray!
- [Laughs] Were you surprised?
uh? Weren't ya?
I almost crapped my pants.
Get the man some new pants.
ow are ya? Ya look good.
Welcome home, scumbag.
Ah, thanks, man.
Looks like you're doin' great.
Yeah, you should see the office.
Come on.
Wow. Wow.
hese cars here, I give 'em
to girls I break up with.
Consolation prizes.
J'ai faim.
Let me guess.
"I'm hungry."
ere's the office. Huh?
[Chuckles]
Over the top, just like you.
It's not over the top. It's nice.
What's your pleasure?
You want steak, lobster, caviar-
yeah- Cindy? That's right.
I like the hair.
Thanks.
I shouldn't be here, Gray.
I knew you were gonna say that,
that's why I had to kidnap ya.
Hey, om.
Just relax, enjoy yourself
for a few hours, okay?
Besides, if you leave,
I'm gonna have to kill ya.
[Cork Pops]
Oh, you know what?
I got a few minutes.
Maybe I'll take one of those sausages.
Ah, I knew it. I knew it!
Mitch, Mitch!
Eh?
I told ya.
Get him a sausage, okay?
nd wrap Cindy up.
e'll have her for lunch tomorrow.
[Door Opens]
You've been missed, my friend.
You've been really missed.
You've done real well.
here's six billion eyeballs in China.
hey gotta watch somethin'.
[Ringtone:
Mock Chinese Melody]
Oh, shit.
So, I'm, uh, gonna go freshen up.
You wanna come?
[Man; s Voice]
You better learn how to pick up
the soap with your feet, bitch.
[Cell Door Slamming]
Welcome back.
I don't think so.
[Gray Speaking Chinese]
ll right.
Sorry.
hese Chinese guys
in San Francisco-
they're makin' me a mint,
but they're a pain in the ass.
hey really are. hanks, baby.
You know, not a Sunday goes by
that I'm in church lightin' candles...
that I don't thank God
you didn't rat me out.
In other words,
thank you, ommy.
A toast.
I toast you, I thank you,
and I want you back.
I don't care
what your fruitcake sister says,
I'm gonna take good care of you.
Salute.
Salute.
[Door Opens, Closes]
[Footsteps]
re you out of your mind?
Jesus, Vik.
You're home one day,
and you're back
with those people?
Come with me.
You scared the hell out of me,
sitting there in the dark.
Good.
What are you so ticked off about?
I'm a grown man.
Listen. It's your life.
You're darn right.
If you want to screw it up,
you can.
Where are we going?
What are we doing?
What are you gonna do,
lock me in the garage?
Dad's truck.
His first truck.
I was gonna wait
till it was waxed, but...
I don't think
there's any time.
[Chuckles]
Man, Vik.
his thing looks brand-new.
Don't lose sight of this, ommy.
Don't get seduced by Gray.
You can take Dad's old company
and make it new again.
You can do it.
I can't believe you did this.
I don't know what to say.
hanks.
hanks for everything.
I just wish Christy were here
to see all this.
If I could bring her back,
I would, okay- I mean, to-
so that you could have it all.
Uh, Christy would want you to do this.
She would want you to make it.
I'm sorry about tonight.
I know.
[Sighs]
New interior, new tire-
Everything's new. It looks great.
[Synthesizer Flute:
Sea Chantey]
Edgar, dab it.
Dab it. Don't slather.
You're an expert
all of a sudden?
Even an idiot knows a dab
from a slather.
So then why don't I just put
little dollops on it?
Now that's... a smear.
I hate this job.
ey, it's better
than slatherin' in prison.
Ex-cons? Really?
Never would've guessed.
Nice work on the Barnacle Buns,
om. Deft touch.
Thank you, Captain.
Got a little mess
on the poop deck.
Restroom. Lunch overboard.
Somebody barfed.
I need you to swab.
[Man] Can I take your order?
I'm picking up a Buccaneer Burger,
Frigate Fries and a vanilla Shipshake.
ye, matey.
Come on, Seaman om.
Swab the deck. Seaman?
- he poop deck is thataway.
It; s not smelling any fresher.
- [Tom] Just a minute.
Swabbie, when I give an order,
I expect your full attention.
Christy. Christy! Hey, Christy!
[Grunting]
She; s not dead.
uh. She's not-
[Echoing] dead!
[Whistle Blowing]
he doctor says not to worry.
he filling will pass
right through his system.
You told me she was dead!
Bye.
[Gasps]
[Man] What's goin' on?
It's all right, folks.
e's not a real pirate.
e's my brother.
Oh. It's okay.
You told me her car exploded.
Exploded!
[Knocks]
I need the room, Denise.
Well, Mr. Ballandorf
is getting his-
Denise, she needs the room!
You remember my brother.
Mm-hmm.
ello, Mr. Ballandorf.
ow are you?
Uhhh-
All right. I'm gonna tell you
something, but I really need you
to calm down first.
Okay. I'm calm.
First of all,
I love you more than anything
in the entire world.
You are my brother
and I never want to see you hurt.
hhh.
This is so hard for me.
[Moans]
Here.
[Sighs]
I want to start by saying...
I never liked Christy,
and I never thought
she was good enough for you.
Six months after you went in,
she dumped you.
No way.
She dumped you, ommy.
She wanted to screw around.
She's trash.
She wanted to tell you
it was over, and I wouldn't let her.
Why not?
I knew how hard it was for you
in prison. I didn't want her
to make it any harder.
his isn't happening.
Yeah, it is.
No, it's not.
[Mr. Ballandorf Sighs]
I have letters she wrote.
She wrote me a lot of letters.
That was me.
Excuse me?
I did it because I love you, Tommy.
I didn't want to see
you suffer anymore.
What about the sexual stuff?
Yeah, that was a little icky.
[Mr. Ballandorf Moans]
You're upset, aren't you?
[Sighs]
Why did you tell me
that she had died?
Well, Fritzi quit,
and I started working for Ed.
he kids got serious
about soccer.
It was the year we put on
the sunroom, remember?
And the letter writing was
just more than I could handle.
So I killed her.
[Moaning Continues]
Yep.
- Probably should turn the gas off.
- [Moaning]
[Gas isses]
- [Cell Phone Beeps]
- [Manager]
Sailor Tom, return the car right now,
or you will walk the plank!
hat means "fired," landlubber.
Arr, Cap'n.
[Engine Stops]
[Bicycle Bell Rings]
[Knocking]
Who is it?
It's me. ommy.
Oh, my God.
[Crowbar Clatters]
I just ate at Pirate Burger.
I know. I work there.
It's part of a probation deal.
Listen, I know you've moved on,
I know you fell in love
with somebody else, but, um-
Oh, my God.
I can't believe this is happening.
I know. My-
[Stammering]
I just- I wanted- wanted to do
is- is say that you, uh-
[Breathing Heavily] Yeah.
[Christy Moaning]
[Man On TV, Indistinct]
- [Man]
Flat panels, L.C.D. S, high-def plasmas-
- [Continues Moaning]
Rear projection Vs-
[Indistinct]
We got the largest selection
of big screens in the country.
[Laughs]
And when I say the country,
I mean the county.
So when it comes to
gettin' the best big screen,
there's no better person to see than me-
Frank Fabercini,
the Big Screen Genie.
In a recent national poll-
that I made up myself
for the purpose
of this very spot-
[ommy]
Oh, yeah. Yeah!
97% of the people agree,
size does matter.
[Springs Squeaking,
Increasing In Speed]
- Again?
- [Squeaking Resumes, Stops]
[Squeaking Resumes, Stops]
- Again?
- [Squeaking Resumes]
[Squeaking Continues, Faster]
[Furniture Rattling]
[Figurine Shatters]
[Squeaking Stops]
[Sighs]
Again?
[Operatic Soprano Vocalizing]
I thought you were dead.
Really? I thought
I was moving pretty good.
No. Viki told me
you were dead.
What?
Yeah, she thought,
while I was in prison,
it would, uh, protect me.
[Sputters]
hat is the-
You know, she never liked me.
In my head, I made
a million plans for us.
Tommy-
No. Marriage, kids, get
my own paint business going.
Slow down. Slow down. Slow down.
No, you gotta hear this.
I never stopped loving you,
even though my sister
told me you were dead.
nd I wanna start over.
I know we gotta start slow.
[Frank] Chris?
[Door Closes]
Shit.
Who's that?
Frank.
Christy?
Who's Frank?
[Whispering]
Frank. Frank is my boyfriend.
Just get in the bathroom. Get-
Christy? ey, babe.
Hi, baby.
Mmm. What are you doing here?
I was driving to work.
I got a little horny.
I thought I'd pop by
for a quick pass in the end zone.
[Laughs] That's... so sweet.
ow come you didn't answer?
You know how nervous I get
when you don't answer.
I was just about to jump
in the shower.
I probably didn't hear you
over the sound of the water.
[Water Continues Running]
his building. [Laughs]
Why don't you run,
get us a cup of coffee.
I'll be with you in five.
Okay.
[Both Chuckle]
ommy, I'm confused.
You're confused?
I wanna watch!
Aw, Jesus.
Ooh, you know I like that.
I'll be with you
in just a minute.
Okay.
Go, go, go.
Out the window.
Wait. The window?
e said he would kill any man
he ever caught me with. Go!
Whoa!
ommy-
[Crash]
[Cat Screeches]
[Dog Barking]
What is this?
hat...
is a little surprise
I got for Maui.
Okay.
[Both Chuckle]
[Bus Brakes issing]
[Man On P.A.]
Line 33, downtown L.A.
[Chattering In Distance]
[Phone Ringing]
I thought you were
Mondays at 4:00.
Who are you,
the Rain Man?
It's a movie about a freak
who remembers things.
Forget about it.
Did you ever kill anybody?
I'm thinking about it.
You're funny.
[Chuckles]
I scored the winning run.
hey gave me the game ball.
What's that, hockey?
Baseball.
I'm really not allowed
to talk to you.
He didn't talk to me.
I was talking to him.
Inside.
If I'm not out in one hour,
you call the police.
[Laughs] Okay.
Oh, my mistake.
You are the police.
A day and a half and you get fired.
What the hell's wrong with you?
I screwed up.
But I have my reasons.
You guys always have reasons.
First of all, I'm not "those guys,"
so please stop calling me "those guys."
nd secondly-
Don't tell me about those guys.
I made a career out of those guys.
I married one of those guys.
So you're familiar with those guys.
I spent the better part
of the day...
begging the captain of Pirate Burger
to give you a second chance.
God, I really appreciate that.
Oh, I know. You want to start up
your dad's business.
I mean, this isn't career day,
Mr. Zelda.
- Do you want to go back to prison?
- No.
- Do you want to go back
to Pirate Burger?
- No.
Well, let's say those were
your only two choices.
Shiver me timbers
and work the sail
[Chorus] Aye, aye, Captain
Pull on the ropes
or drink the ale
What are you doing?
I'm fryin' the Frigate Fries.
You fry the Frigate Fries
at 350.
No. he Matey Potateys are at 350
just like the Doubloon Loaf.
You don't even fry
the "Duh-bloon" Loaf.
It's baked, nose-wipe.
Oh, that really hurts my feelings.
Well, how about "bastard son
of a failed pickpocket
and a hooker"?
So that's it for you guys?
he great potato debate?
Don't you guys have any dreams,
I mean, something you want
to do with your lives?
Well, yeah, y-you know-
you know, live a nice life,
uh, no more jail,
or maybe start a family,
some shit like that.
I really like dancing. I wanna-
You know, I'm good at it.
Sailor om, delivery.
And stay on course, Sailor.
nd let's keep it
under 30 knots, Sailor.
Ah, yeah, yeah.
[Beeping]
[Line Ringing]
Pick up, Christy. Pick up.
ello?
ey, it's me. ommy.
Um, I need to see you.
ommy, uh, last night
was a mistake.
What are you talking about?
Uh, l- I'm sorry.
I'm really confused right now.
- And I can't talk.
I've gotta go to my parents'.
- Wait a minute. Christy!
Christy!
Sorry.
[Engine Stops]
Arr.
[Laughing]
Um, what are you doing here?
What are you doing here?
I live here.
I know. You're Papadopolous.
It says "Franklin, 413."
Ah.
Ethan, get out here.
Um, that's his father's last name.
e did this to get you here.
And that's why he asked me
where you were working.
Well, it's a good thing
I don't work for a car dealership.
[Chuckles]
Um-
[Slaps Thigh]
Just wait here.
Ethan,
get out here now.
[Knocking]
I am going to count to five,
young man.
One,
two-
ey, what's with the hat?
Three-
uh. You think
you could wear this any better?
Be my guest.
Four-
Oh, yeah. hat's workin'.
Do you remember what the word
"consequences" means?
[ogether]
I do.
Oh. Uh, you came in.
Yeah. I need you to cover this.
Uh, what-
Uh, what do I owe you?
ell you what.
he Mutiny on the Brownie-
that'll be my treat.
Let's say, um, 13 even.
his is coming out
of your allowance.
Why? L; ve... gotta eat.
Ethan, where-
where did he get the hat?
Boy, I didn't-
ow did he get that?
Um, sorry for the trouble.
It's no trouble.
here's enough for all of us.
Uh, finish packing.
I don't want to go
to the stinky desert
for the weekend.
- Grandma smells like corn.
- So does mine.
- All right, would you not help?
- Well, I'm just sayin'.
Pack.
[Clears hroat]
I'll, um, see you Monday.
Right.
You know, this apartment
sure could use a paint job.
Oh, well, I'll speak to my decorator.
[Ethan]
Can my room be blue?
Pack.
I'm just sayin', if my painting
business was up and running-
Uh-huh.
Yeah.
Good night, Mr. Zelda.
See you Monday.
Hold on a second.
Um,
just... don't take this the wrong way,
because you seem like an okay guy.
Yeah.
I would really appreciate it
if you wouldn't encourage my son.
e's looking for something,
and I-I don't want him
to find it in you.
See you Monday.
[Door Opens, Closes]
[Lock Clicks]
[Cell Phone Beeping]
[Line Ringing]
Pick up. Pick up. Pick up.
[Women Chattering, Laughing]
[Cell Phone Ringing]
- hank you.
- [Continues Ringing]
[Chattering, Laughing
Continues]
[Ringing Muffled]
[ires Squealing]
[Engine Stops]
[Chattering, Laughing
In Distance]
[Knocking]
I'll get it.
ey, there.
I'm here to see Christy.
Oh, my God. his is brilliant.
What's with the party?
Engagement party.
They didn't tell you?
No.
Oh, hey, she is gonna love this.
Christy, your pirate's here.
Oh, my God.
[Whispering]
Do you need music,
or do you have your own?
[Woman]
Who knew that they came
in fuchsia?
[Women Laugh]
You said "boyfriend."
You never said "fiance."
I didn't want to hurt you.
I wish somebody would hurt me,
somebody'd tell me
the damn truth!
I'm sorry.
You can't marry this guy.
What about us?
"Us" was a long time ago.
"Us" was last night.
Okay, it just kind of came
out of nowhere.
My head was spinning, and-
- [Chattering, Laughing
Continues, Muffled]
- I love Frank.
Who the hell is Frank?
Frank Fabercini.
The Big Screen Genie?
Oh, he's a great guy. He's a-
e's a little insecure at times,
but he loves me.
I love you.
[Sighs]
I love you.
I guess a part of me
is always gonna love you.
But, ommy, you were
in jail for three years.
hree year-
Look at this. Look at this.
While you were away, Frank was-
was building a business,
and he's gonna be...
the number four
Mitsubishi salesman
in the North Valley.
Oh, whoop-de-do.
I got a paint business.
It could be the biggest one on the planet.
hat's not the point.
You're marrying for money.
For stability.
Uh, for the future. L-
I wanna have a child.
his is so hard.
If things were different,
I would probably be
marrying you.
Yeah. Yeah.
I gotta get back inside.
[Laughing, Chattering
Continues]
Just wait a second,
wait a second, wait a second.
I just need a chance
to get my life back on track.
I can be the guy you need.
I think I already have
the guy I need.
[Sighs]
ommy, wait. Wait, wait, wait.
Wait a minute.
I want you
to promise me something.
Promise me that if you ever-
and I mean ever-
need a V, DVD
or any other high-end electronics,
that you will call us.
[Frank]
You can't beat that anywhere.
hat means you will be watching
your brand-spanking-new V
that very night.
"What? hat same night?"
hat's right!
Because when you buy from Frank,
I will personally deliver
your new big screen-
I'm not giving up.
I spent too much time thinking
about Christy to walk away now.
[Frank Continues, Indistinct]
You think I'm insane for being
so hung up on her, don't you?
No, I think you; re a romantic,
and you're holding on to a dream,
even though the reality is
that Christy is a cheap slut,
and you deserve better.
ere.
You have the last cookie.
[Splashes In Water]
Okay. hat was a little blunt.
I just don't understand
what you're doing with her.
You should be
with somebody nice.
She just wants someone
to provide for her.
There's nothing wrong with that.
I just need some time
to get my game on, you know?
Just feel like
I'm playing catch-up.
Ketchup?
It's two words: "catch-up."
[Kitchen Sailor]
So there's no chance
of her comin' back early.
Nah, she's in the desert
till Sunday.
[Rattling]
I almost got this.
lmost got this. lmost-
What?
e wonders
why your breath smells
like a donkey.
[Strains]
Got it. So my youth wasn't
entirely wasted.
All right. Come on.
Come on. Come on.
Oh, boy. Boy, boy. Okay.
- hese walls are gonna need
a lot of prep.
- Yeah, they are.
All right.
wo coats of flat on the walls.
Let's do gloss on all the trim.
We got some work to do, guys.
Let's get at it. Come on.
What the hell?
Come on.
Careful with
the little pottery pieces.
[Pottery Shatters]
Watch out. Okay.
You guys, get- careful
with those candlesticks.
Oh.
Candlesticks?
I didn't see any candlesticks.
ey, you know
how to use this stuff?
Yeah.
I'm going down to get primer.
[Mutters]
Don't mind me
if I watch for a minute.
Oh, you can watch.
Good. Very good.
[Farts]
[Scoffs, Stammering]
Aw!
You spilled the paint?
You look like y-you need
a little activator.
Put it back.
hanks for makin' us
a part of this, ommy.
ey, you guys did me the favor,
and I won't forget this.
Beats bein' a freakin' pirate.
I'm gonna pay you back
for this someday, om-
somethin' big.
[Chuckles]
Like what?
ow the hell should I know?
Just thought of it.
[Sighing]
[Gasps]
Oh, my God.
We've been painted.
You wanna know a secret?
Sure.
I lost my virginity
in this truck.
Oh, my God.
hat is so weird.
So did I.
[Chuckles]
It gets weirder.
So did Mom.
[Chuckles]
Say, it does get weirder.
[Vehicle pproaching]
[Engine Stops]
- Angela.
- What the hell were you thinking?
re you out of your mind?
I just wanted you to know
how good I was.
At what? I mean,
breaking and entering-
I could have you arrested.
I love my blue room.
- uh.
- II right. Just go back to the car.
And if you do this again,
I will have you arrested.
[Engine Starts]
Your probation officer.
Yeah.
You broke into her apartment.
Yeah.
[Car Departs]
Bold.
[Vehicle pproaching]
ey! Come on. Get in.
I think he means me.
ommy, you drive.
[Engine Revving]
[ires Screeching]
[Gray]
You like this car, huh?
Yeah. his is beautiful.
[Engine Revving]
- Come on. ake it, take it. Don't be afraid.
- h, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Come on. If you see a cop,
just floor it. We; ll be in Mexico
before he can flip on the siren.
[Gray]
his isn't a golf cart. Drive it.
- [Engine Revs]
- I'm on probation.
Forgive me if I'm a little nervous
about doing 125 in a 25.
[ires Screech]
God, this thing's nice.
Good mileage too, right?
[Gray Laughing]
[ires Screech]
[ommy Chuckling]
[Gray Laughs]
Oh! Oh!
[Sighs]
Whoo!
You love doing that, don't ya?
Yeah.
You love this car too.
I love this car.
You want it?
Don't do this to me, Gray.
ommy, I want you back.
I need you to come back.
I need someone
I can trust to take this
thing to the next level.
I just got out of prison.
And how's that goin' for you?
You having any fun?
Any money?
Big future, huh?
Well, nobody ever went
to prison painting a house.
You're not gonna go away.
It; s not cans and film
and videotape anymore, Tommy.
We stream the master
to China broadband.
All right? Nobody here
even gets their hands dirty.
ommy, it could have
been me who went away.
It was you. All right?
I owe you.
Let me-
Let me give you this.
he take's 12 million.
alf of it's yours.
Six for you, six for me.
You gotta do me a favor.
You gotta stop asking.
[Elevator Bell Dings]
[Footsteps Approaching]
Sorry I'm late.
ey. re you seeing
another ex-con?
I mean,
is it over between us?
I stopped home
to check on Ethan.
[Exhales Sharply]
e was up all night
with an earache.
Is the kid okay?
Not that I'm taking any special
interest in your kid or his ear.
No, the- the kid is fine.
hank you.
Good.
Uh, we really do
have to move this along.
I'm late for the office.
I mean, it's my job to scrape
onion debris out of the fryer.
I really wanna knock
their socks off.
Well, this will
just take a second.
What you did yesterday
was incredibly stupid.
In retrospect, perhaps.
I mean, you really pissed me off.
But I do know what
you were trying to do.
Doesn't make it any less stupid,
just more understandable.
You're a really good painter.
hank you. What changed?
What do you mean?
Why the change of heart?
Oh, I don't know. A little-
A little voice just
kept saying over and over,
"Don't be so mad. Don't be so mad."
he kid.
Yep.
I spoke to a judge I know
who does a lot of work with ex-cons.
e said he needed
some painting done,
and I told him about you.
Call him.
Wow.
[Chuckles]
Remember, nothing changes.
Nah, l- But-
No, you keep the day job
and paint in your spare time.
Um, I don't know what to say.
Say you won't screw it up.
I won't screw it up.
[Rings]
[On Machine]
i. It's Christy.
You know what to do.
[Machine Beeps]
Christy, it's ommy.
You know I never give up.
Got my first painting gig.
You're engaged,
but you're not married yet.
his may sound crazy,
but we're gonna work
this out somehow.
You know why?
You know why, babe?
Because I want you.
You hear that? I want you.
[Line Disconnects]
[Machine Beeps]
[Grunting]
ey, ommy,
you look pretty chipper
cleaning that fryer.
Well, that's 'cause
I got us another paintin' gig.
[Grunts]
Feels like there's
a dead body in here.
You'd know.
Oh, my goodness.
Look at her.
ommy, come check this out.
Oh, man.
I would love to bang her.
Oh, I'd bang her
till she forgot her name.
er name is Christy.
hat's Christy?
Perhaps we were
a bit indelicate.
I figured this whole thing out,
and I am so thrilled,
I had to come down.
Okay.
I have to marry Frank.
I just do.
L-I'm in it too far,
and there's a band.
We're going to Maui.
And I love him.
Oh.
But I love you too.
Huh?
So, here's what we're gonna do.
It's a little different,
but it's the only way.
I am gonna marry Frank.
But you and I
are gonna see each other
whenever we can.
What?
Oh, hear me out.
e travels and he works late.
e's in the rmy Reserve. I know.
It's wrong. We're all Catholic.
But I think in the end,
we're all gonna get what we want.
- I don't wanna do that.
- Oh, come on, honey. hink about it.
[Kissing]
Mm-mm-mmm!
It grows on you.
Mmm!
God, I wanna make love
to you right now.
I really wanna make love to you.
But unfortunately I have
to go taste wedding cakes
with Frank. Love you.
[Man]
Arr! Can I take your order, please?
Mmm!
[Door Opens]
[Door Closes]
- Screw her.
- Screw Frank "Frabocini," too,
while we're at it.
I mean,
has she lost her mind?
Who- Who goes into a marriage
planning on cheating?
What woman anyway?
You know what you tell her?
You tell her,
"Dump Frank or forget it."
De-e-livery.
Wow, ommy.
hat is one saucy wench
you've got. Arr!
Shiver me timbers.
What am I doin'?
She's got the rich guy now
and a big fat diamond.
If I were smart-
If I were smart, I'd just walk away.
You know what?
I don't care what he says.
e's still not over her.
I really wanna do
something for that guy.
Something big.
What the hell you gonna do?
ow should I know?
I'm just- It's a gesture.
Poor guy. She's turning
his whole life upside down.
Do you think...
she'd do me on the side?
Oh, good.
he convicts are here.
Ka-ching, ka-ching.
[Engine Stops]
Bada-bing.
Brown-chickee brown cow
I should have been a judge.
Well, you stood up
in front of enough of 'em.
Listen, guys. Let's go in,
check out the situation,
be courteous
and act like professionals.
here's a magazine
just about hotels.
ow's it going, guys?
ey, good.
Beautiful house, sir.
Oh, yeah. Beautiful house.
If I gotta take a dump,
I'm taking it home with me.
Is that right?
We've met before,
haven't we?
Uh, I don't think so.
[Snaps Fingers]
Edgar.
Cover it and let's move on.
Man, I am hungry.
Yeah. Mm-hmm.
We keep moving at this pace,
we'II be out of here
by early afternoon.
Perfect.
Huh.
- Oh, my God.
- What? rat?
No. My sister.
[Chuckles]
Look what she made.
Zelda and Son Painting.
homas Zelda.
Wow, that's nice, ommy.
hat's-
God, she make one
with our names on it?
Probably in
tomorrow's lunch.
- Which one of you is ommy?
- Right here.
Oh, thank you. Hey, there.
Nice work.
What are you,
checking up on me?
[Scoffs]
A little. Ethan had
a game just nearby,
and I thought it might not
be a bad idea to come by
and see how it was going.
Well, it's, uh, actually
going really, really good.
Terrific.
It's great to hear.
Where's the judge?
In small pieces
in the basement.
I'm afraid we had a little tiff
over the price, and I overreacted.
[Laughs]
ey, there.
What's happenin'?
Hit a triple.
Must be pretty exciting
for a basketball player.
I mean, triples and all that.
If you actually
went to a baseball game,
maybe you could learn something.
Yeah, don't get asked
that much but, uh, thanks.
You know, busy guy.
Um, honey,
can you give us a second?
Mom.
One, two-
hree, four.
That's really quite impressive.
Just out of curiosity,
what happens when you get to five?
Oh. Well, you do not
wanna know.
Well, I'm- I was not
encouraging him just now.
I just wanted to say hello.
No, I know. I know,
and l- I appreciate it.
I do my best to be unappealing,
but, man, it's a losing battle.
[Laughs]
ey. Um, do you wanna come
to his game tomorrow?
I don't wanna do anything
to encourage him.
No, l-I'm saying it's okay.
I just-
Do you wanna come
to the baseball game?
You said-
No, I'm just-
Just answer me.
I will answer you.
I just wanna know-
Yeah, one, two-
Yeah. Yes. hat would be nice.
hank you for asking.
See?
Okay.
Okay.
Get back to work.
Okay.
uh. Yeah. Yeah.
I could do that.
[Chattering, Clapping]
[Cheering]
Oh!
So, the- the idea...
is to catch it.
Yeah.
[Whistles]
Good job!
[Cheering]
- [Angela] Go, go, go, go!
- You're out!
[Whistling]
hat's a double play.
hat's a double play!
he kid's good.
[Laughs]
Oh. Look,
he's showing off.
Oh, he's not like that
when it's just me. But-
[Umpire]
Play ball.
Go, Bulldogs!
[Chattering]
Whoo!
Nice.
Nice.
ow long has it
just been you?
Mmm.
Would it be okay if we just
kept it about baseball?
Sure.
- Bulldogs!
- [Groans]
You know, it's-
it's always been just me.
Ethan's dad left nine years ago,
so since then
it's always been just me.
No. Correction.
he night Ethan was conceived,
it was the two of us.
But since then
it's been just me.
You meet him at work?
Baseball, right.
I'm not much of
a team-sport guy myself.
I tried drag racing.
Mostly other people's cars.
Yeah, I'm okay.
[Umpire]
Play ball!
Well, Ethan's father was,
um, an incredibly sexy...
and incredibly charming
con man.
e called me his angel.
[Laughs]
ey.
Sorry. Just-
No. Well, he said it
so many times, I believed him.
And then one day
he emptied my bank account
and took my car and disappeared.
So- I mean, l-I had this fantasy
that I could save him.
[Bat Strikes Ball]
[Moans]
[Cheering]
What an idiot.
I don't think you're an idiot
for caring about someone.
No, I meant him.
I had this whole picture,
but none of it was true.
It's just amazing
what we can talk ourselves into.
[Boy]
Come on, guys. Let's get a run!
[Exhales Sharply]
[Person Whistling]
Strike one.
Go, Ethan! Focus.
[People Cheering]
Good job! Go, Bulldogs.
m I loud?
Yeah.
Yeah. Sorry.
Hey.
Hey!
ey. hat was great today, kid.
I'm beginning to like
this football.
[Chuckles] Baseball.
hanks for coming.
Hey, it was a lot of fun.
It was a lot of fun.
hanks for asking me.
Yeah. Oh, great.
I guess I'll see you Monday?
Yes.
Um, uh, wait a minute.
Um, uh-
Back at the game
when I was talking about myself,
I don't usually do
personal real well.
I haven't done it at all
in a long time. nd-
Listen. You don't owe me
an explanation. Let's just
keep this about baseball.
No, I wanna say something.
his- his job makes you tough,
it makes you put up
a lot of brick walls,
and, well, it felt good to be
a little less tough today.
So, thank you. hank you.
ey. ow was your day?
Great. What are you doing
sitting out here?
Oh, just relaxing.
It was nice of her
to ask you.
- Yes, it was.
- I like that ngela.
I know you do.
Don't go in. Sit next to me.
You want a beer?
[Pats Bench]
- Yeah, let me go pee first.
- Oh, pee in the azaleas.
he kids do.
I think Grandma does too.
And then come sit down.
Stay out here with me.
It's such a beautiful day.
[Chuckles]
Little brother.
All right.
Okay. All right.
I'm just gonna-
Is there some reason
you don't want me going
into the house?
Don't be ridiculous.
Why wouldn't I want you
to go in the house?
She's up. She wants you.
She's not the only one.
Ah-
- Oops.
- What's going on?
[Scoffs]
[Grandma]
Viki!
I'II be right there.
Viki!
What's going on?
Nothing. She's fine. She fainted.
- She fainted.
- Yeah. Apparently she got
some upsetting news.
Vik?
When I got home, she was
on the phone with Air France.
She was gonna
take us all to Paris
to see Simone's launch.
Your fiancee.
he French astronaut.
Vik, I know who
the heck Simone is!
Hey, hey, come on.
God, ommy. She was
reading out the last three digits
of her MasterCard.
I had to stop her.
I told her there was
a practice launch today...
and the whole rocket blew up.
Bad fuel mix, faulty wiring.
Simone didn't make it.
What are you guys, on crack?
She didn't make it?
Yeah.
She didn't exist!
Grammy. Grammy, it's me.
Are you okay?
Guys, let me handle this
for a minute here.
ey, I heard you fainted.
Are you okay?
Oh, my poor ommy.
I'm so sorry.
I'm gonna be okay.
Such a tragedy.
Such a waste.
Will you bring the body here?
Is there a body?
[Moans]
Je suis tres triste.
What are you saying?
What's she saying?
"I am very sad."
Mon coeur. Mon coeur.
La douleur.
er heart. er heart.
he pain.
Christ, boy!
Didn't you pick up any French?
[Clears hroat]
[Exhales]
[Birds Twittering]
- Beautiful!
- [Gasps]
Fuck!
I beg your pardon?
Edgar?
I'm sorry about
the language, ma'am,
but you scared the shit
right out of my ass.
[Sighs]
Mrs. Pierce,
uh, we're just about finished.
You guys have done
a really great job.
I appreciate that.
We all appreciate that.
ow would you feel
about doing the upstairs?
Um, I think we'd feel fine
about that.
Well, great.
We'll finish up in here,
and I'll give you an estimate.
Wonderful. Thank you.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah. Yeah.
Pow!
[Rings]
ello.
ey, ngela. It's me, ommy.
Did I catch you at a bad time?
Oh. No. Hi.
Uh, no, we're just on our way
to a birthday party.
[Ethan]
I don't even like that kid!
Uh, what's up?
Great news.
Mrs. Pierce asked us
to paint the upstairs.
hat is great.
Well, I just wanted you
to be the first to know.
[Hands Slapping Hands]
Uh, uh, bye.
[Hands Slapping Face]
Hey, fellas!
Hey.
Oh. Not bad.
She just wants a color change.
Gotta prep these walls.
I'll run down
and get some primer.
ey, ommy,
thanks for making us
a part of this.
A couple of mutts like us
with real jobs. Sure beats workin'
at the prison paint shop.
- ey, you're welcome, man.
- Yeah, I'm never gonna
forget this, Tommy.
Some day I'm gonna do
something to pay you back.
Something big.
hanks, Edgar. You can start
by moving the dresser.
I'll be right back.
Come on.
What do you mean, "Come on"?
I'm comin'.
So what's this big thing?
What big thing?
his big thing
you're gonna do for ommy.
How the hell should I know?
Would you get off
my back already?
I mean, what are you gonna do?
You gonna show him
how nice you can dance?
You gonna dance for him, Edgar?
ey, you know something?
Why do you got a problem
with every frickin' thing I do?
Friggin'?
Frickin'. Yeah. Frickin'.
Damn.
[Engine Stops]
i.
i. What are you doing here?
Well, I wa- I was driving home
and I knew what time you got off.
nd I'm not stalking you
or anything.
[Laughs]
So, anyway,
I just timed it out
and I guess-
Oh, okay, I guess
I am stalking you.
[Exhales]
You wanna come in?
Oh, uh, no.
Ethan's- I can't.
Ethan's asleep in the car.
Yeah, yeah.
Just crack the window
and lock the door.
No. L-I just came
to say something,
and I wanted
to say it in person.
All right.
So, here we are in person,
and here it is.
You are different.
I don't know
how much different,
but you are.
No, you are.
And I know
he likes you, and-and-
and that's very important,
but he's never been
burned romantically
by someone like you.
I mean-
I don't mean to call you-
I'm sorry. No, no,
I don't mean to call you
"someone like you,"
because you're nothing
like something like
someone like you.
And l-I don't even know
if "romantic" is the-
I'm not even sure
that "romantic"
is the right word.
And, uh, right now
I'm not even sure that-
I don't even know
what the hell
I'm doing here. I'm-
I wish that cleared
things up. I'm still-
Do you- Do you-
Do you wanna come over
for dinner tomorrow night?
Are-Are you sure
you wanna do this?
No.
I'll be there at 8:00.
Great.
Okay.
Great.
[Sighs]
[Engine Starts]
[Clears Throat]
[No Audible Dialogue]
[Car Departing]
[ommy]
I can't work tonight.
And why not?
[ommy]
Because I have a date.
Dear, would you
get me that nice syrup
I like in my coffee...
that makes it taste so good?
Oh. hank you, dear.
Uh-uh-uh.
So good on a cold evening.
It's August.
All right, fine.
his helps. It just does.
I'm upset about Simone
and what it's done to ommy.
senseless tragedy.
wo shattered lives.
Yeah. Love is easy
when you're this pretty.
ow do I look? Huh?
You're going out?
Grief counselor, Grammy.
e's going to see
his grief counselor.
Oh.
For my grief.
['60s Pop]
[Man]
here's a kind of hush
All over the world tonight
All over the world
You can hear the sounds
of lovers in love
You know what I mean
[Knocks]
Just the two of us
And nobody else in sight
[Ends]
You son of a bitch!
I go out on a limb for you,
and this is how you pay me back?
ey, hey, hey, hey.
What are you talking about?
Oh! Oh, don't bullshit me.
Where's the ring?
What ring?
Judge Pierce just called.
is wife's diamond ring is gone.
So, give it back.
I didn't take it.
Oh, brilliant. Just brilliant.
Believe me, this had
nothing to do with me.
All right, just get it back,
ommy, tonight,
or the judge will call the police.
[Voice Cracking]
I bought you a couple of hours.
God knows why.
his has nothing
to do with me.
I didn't do this.
I am such an idiot!
[Exhales]
[Chattering]
[Manager]
Cancel all orders for
the Octo-pounder with cheese.
No more. None.
Oh, thank God you're here.
Your two friends are gone.
What?
hey abandoned ship.
Grab your uniform.
- Figures.
- Wait!
Arr! Welcome
to Pirate Burger.
May I take your order?
Yeah. Frigate Fries.
Wonderful choice.
ey. ey, Rick.
ey, ommy. It's ommy.
ey, ommy, we've been
waiting for your phone call.
Listen, remember
that big thing that we said
we was gonna do for you?
We? hat was my-
All right. hat Edgar said
he was gonna do for you?
- Well, it's all done, man.
- [Both Arguing]
- Just tell me where that ring is.
- Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
So you haven't got it yet?
Just tell me
where that ring is.
Oh, you're gonna love this.
[Muttering]
[Engine Not urning Over]
Great. Come on. Come on!
[Gasps]
[orn Honking]
[ires Screech]
[Horn Honking]
We have got to order
from them.
[Horn Honking]
So who's ommy?
What the hell is going on?
I am sorry, honey.
It's complicated.
I can explain.
My God. Look at
the size of that thing.
[Knocking]
Is that him?
I didn't hear anything.
e's here? e's here?
his asshole's here?
Is that what you're telling me?
- Son of a- Son of a bitch!
- Christy. Christy.
I've gotta get that ring back.
Hey! Hey!
All right, stop, stop, stop.
Don't. No, no, don't.
L- I love him.
What?
Well, I love both of you.
Yeah, but, um, I don't love you.
Oh. Well, in that case
maybe I just love Frank.
hat's it. You come-
No, stop, stop, stop, stop.
What about the ring?
It was stolen.
I don't care.
It was magnificent.
Enough. Come here.
No, no.
Oh!
[Groaning]
Listen. I'm sorry.
I didn't mean to do that.
I wasn't gonna hit you.
o be honest, Frank, there's no way
I could have known that.
[Labored Speech]
hat's a good point. Ice.
Get him some ice.
Here, right here.
Thanks.
Or a bag of frozen vegetables
are even better.
[Groaning]
ry to breathe through it.
Breathe through it. Breathe.
Breathe. Just breathe.
Look, put the peas
on his nuts.
[Gasps]
Okay, I'm so confused.
No, you're not confused.
You love this guy.
I'm just a complication
from your past. Frank, you have
nothing to worry about with me.
I'm gonna get out of your lives.
Because Christy,
she's crazy about you.
Christy?
It's true. It's true, Frank.
I do love you and only you.
I know that now.
- Baby.
- Listen, guys.
I hate to interrupt, but I gotta go.
- ommy?
- [Moans]
[Whispering]
What about the weekend thing?
[Whispering]
I don't think so, but thanks anyway.
[Gasps]
[Mouthing Words]
[Sighs]
Angela.
[Knocks]
Angela.
I got it back.
All right. I'll call the judge.
Good night, ommy.
ey. Wait a minute.
No, please.
It's been a long day.
Angela.
his had nothing to do with me.
You gotta know that.
Okay. It wasn't you.
I've gotta go.
Wait a second.
I hired those two idiots.
hat's my fault. hat's it.
- ey.
- II right, Ethan, get back in bed.
- Now!
- [Grunts]
Okay. I screwed up.
I'm sorry. I'm really sorry.
I just want things to be
whatever we were gonna be.
I can't. I thought I could.
I wanted to. But I can't.
Why not?
I can't get even a little bit close
to someone like you.
I mean, the ring, those guys.
here'll always
be trouble in your life,
and I don't need anymore.
L-I just have enough of my own.
This isn't right, Angela.
Please, ommy.
If you care about us,
leave us alone.
I thought when
somebody says they're sorry,
you're supposed to forgive them.
- Well, this is different.
- ow? e said he was sorry.
e's not coming
around anymore, is he?
[Crying]
You know how
I'm always busting your chops
about your dumb ideas...
and all the big things
you wanna do for ommy?
Yeah. Yeah,
it really hurts sometimes.
[Dance Pop]
Well, this time you were right.
Jacking that ring was
the most thoughtful thing
you've ever done.
You see, I just want people
to be happy.
Well, he and Christy
are gonna be real happy.
You think they're gonna
invite us to the wedding?
Without question.
We'll be the best man.
I'm telling you, Edgar.
What you did for ommy...
is gonna turn everything
around for him.
[Siren Wails]
[Man On P.A.]
Pull the vehicle
to the side of the road.
[Grunts]
I was bringing it back.
Who would steal this piece of shit?
[Camera Shutter Clicks]
[Camera Shutter Clicking]
[Camera Shutter Clicks]
[Rings]
ello?
[Beeps]
[Line Ringing]
ey. I think I might need
a little help.
Zelda.
[Doors Open]
[Door Slides, Clicks]
[Buzzer Sounds]
Let's get outta here.
[Vehicle Doors Closing]
[Vehicle Engine Revving]
What am I supposed to tell
my probation officer?
I am so screwed.
You won't tell her anything.
It never happened.
Yeah?
No record.
No paper. No trace.
he desk sergeant owes me.
For real?
For real.
Aren't you the man.
hanks. I mean it. hanks.
And I'm back in.
Really?
Yeah, I'm back in.
[Chuckles]
[Engine Stops]
ommy. ommy,
as soon as I can set it up,
we gotta go to San Francisco.
I need you to meet my Chinese guys,
'cause pretty soon they're gonna be
your Chinese guys.
ere.
Jesus, Gray.
That's a signing bonus.
Later.
I'm glad you're back.
[Engine Revving]
What the hell
was he doing here?
Where were you?
I gotta get some sleep.
What were you doing with him?
Listen, I had a real shitty night,
and I just wanna go to bed.
You're working for him,
aren't you?
Stupid asshole.
You're gonna end up back in jail.
hanks for the opinion,
but I know what I'm doin'.
If you're with him,
I don't want you
back in this house.
Okay. Okay.
[Sobbing]
[Engine Stops]
[Door Closes]
[Vehicle Doors Close]
[Engine Starts]
[Knocks]
i, I'm Ethan Papadopolous.
- ello.
- Is ommy home?
No, ommy's not home.
Will he be home soon?
I don't know.
I don't think so.
Does your mom know
you rode all the way over here?
No. Please don't tell her.
I just wanted to talk to ommy.
Okay. I'll tell him you came by.
Are you gonna be able
to get home before dark?
Yeah.
[Media File Rewinding]
[Gray]
We'll make the trip
a couple times together,
and then once the Chinamen
get to know you,
you'll make the trip by yourself.
[Beeping]
Who you callin'?
My sister.
Your sister?
Come on. You're such a goon.
You know what I'm wearing.
[Phone Beeps]
I have to take this.
ommy? Where are you?
ey, Viki, I just wanted to call you,
and I want you to know
that I'm okay.
- Come home.
- I can't come home right now.
I'm leaving town
for a couple of days on business.
I'll call you when I get back.
You can't leave town.
You'll break probation.
Don't do this.
I know what I'm doing,
all right? Just, uh-
[Woman] Tail number?
[Gray] 484 ango Lima.
[Woman]
Welcome to Santa Monica Airport.
[ires Screech]
[orn Honks]
ommy, what are you doing
with this guy?
ey, Vik. As soon
as I get back, I'm gonna-
ey, sis, it's Gray here.
ow you doin'?
ow's your bald-headed
little bastard husband?
- What's the matter with you?
- [Gray] Come on. What's the matter?
[orn Honks]
Come on!
ommy, once we get on the plane,
they, uh- they give me a pilot's hat.
[Laughs]
No, no, no, don't laugh.
Don't laugh. Don't laugh.
It just makes me feel good.
No, I'm just foolin' with ya.
[ires Screech]
If I wanted a pilot's hat,
they'd give me one.
You know that, don't ya?
ommy!
Christ.
ey, Vik,
you gotta go back home.
Ethan's missing!
Since when?
Who the heck is Ethan?
Angela called right after you did.
e didn't come home last night.
Um- l-I gotta go.
I gotta go.
What?
I gotta go find that kid.
ommy, get on the plane.
Come on!
e came by the house
yesterday looking for you.
ommy, I'm not messing around.
Get on the plane, or else you're done.
Don't go with him.
Listen to me.
Tommy, I'm not messing around.
Look for him on milk cartons.
Hey, hey!
Hey!
Are you all right?
Yeah.
Come on.
I'm all right.
Come on. Let's go.
Yeah.
[ires Screech]
Excuse me.
ey, ngela. Angela, look.
I know you don't want me here,
but I'm just here to help.
- What can I do to help find him?
- [Ethan] Hey.
elp you find the kid.
[Panting]
You found him.
Well, I was worried.
I was really worried.
Where'd you go last night?
Sizzler.
You ran away to a buffet?
Wait, nobody ran away.
e didn't run away
and just come back?
No.
- Didn't you call my sister
and say he ran away?
- No.
- I was held up.
- You got engaged.
- If I could bring her back, I would.
- She dumped you, ommy.
- Simone didn't make it.
- Letter writing was just more
than I could handle.
- So I killed her.
- Ethan's missing!
uh. My sister.
My sister-
[Laughs]
Should be hospitalized.
Viki told me Ethan had run away
so that I would come back here.
Why?
Why? Maybe she eats
too much bran.
Well, because she's insane.
And she probably
should be locked up.
I was worried.
I'm glad you're safe.
And I should go.
I'm sorry to bother you.
hank you.
If we hurry
I can make Cooper's
soccer game.
I knew you wouldn't
go with Gray.
Yeah?
You wanna know how I knew?
'Cause you're a good guy.
I hate you.
It'll pass.
I have to go back up there.
You knew that too,
didn't you?
See if they wanna
come for meat loaf.
[Knocking]
ey. Can I talk to you
for a minute?
Mm-hmm.
[Door Closes]
Um, listen. I know
you're scared, ngela.
nd-
I'm not the guy
that went into prison.
I'm the man that came out.
here's-
A bad man doesn't go
to a Little League baseball game...
or feel the way I felt
when I thought something
was wrong here.
here's nothing bad
about how I feel about you.
Well, you're
a good man, om.
But maybe that's
what I'm afraid of.
[Sighs]
[ommy]
Hey, Viki, we're here.
Everyone,
Ethan and Angela.
Hi. I'm Viki.
Oh! So glad you're here.
Me too.
Come in. Come in.
Hey, you.
You like meat loaf?
Oh, yeah.
Yo. Cooper.
Ethan.
ow do you do?
I'm Ed, Ethan.
Nice to meet you. Hi.
- i. ngela.
- hat's our daughter, lex.
Nice to meet you.
Hi. Nice to meet you.
I'm Cooper.
Nice to meet you.
Hi, Cooper.
Uh, I can take that.
Oh, great.
- And this is Grandma.
- [Grandma]
Oh, lovely to meet you.
[Ed]
I'm goin' back to work.
Well, this all worked out.
You see how a little white lie
can be good?
[Grandma]
You're Angela.
[Kissing]
Oh, you have been
so wonderful to ommy.
I don't know how
he could do without you.
Oh, well, thank you,
but he's done all the hard work.
And you should be
very proud of your mommy.
I don't know how someone decides
to become a grief counselor,
but thank you.
Oh. Grief counselor?
Oh, enough about grief.
Grief, schmief.
I say, good grief, let's eat.
Well, I think you must have me
confused with someone else.
I'm ommy's probation officer.
Mm-hmm.
But-
Well, he had to see me
when he got out ofjail.
ommy was in jail?
[Guitar Intro]
[Soul]
Come here, Mama
and dig this crazy scene
hanks again for everything, ommy.
You've been real good to us.
Anybody else might have hit us
in the head with a shovel.
Oh, yeah.
e's doing that big thing...
for you... right now.
Not a good idea. I'm tired.
[Clapping]
ey, get back in line.
Get back in line.
Big hands, Edgar.
Big hands.
Big jazz hands.
here you go, two-steppin'.
Yeah, yeah.
Get your ears into it.
You're kickin', yeah.
Oh, the spin. here you go.
ey, get back
on your toes.
I like that move.
here you- Oh.
Yeah, the-
the wiggle-waggle.
I like that too.
here you go.
[Laughs]
Yeah, hump it out.
here you go.
Hump it out. Hump it out.
[Man]
Papa's got a brand-new bag
Oh, Papa
He's doing the Jerk
Papa
He's doing the Jerk
e's doing the Twist
just like this
He's doing the Fly
every day and every night
he thing's
Like the Boomerang
Hey
Come on
ey, hey
Come on
ey, hey
Says he's uptight
Outta sight
Come on
See what you know
Come on
[Ends]
[Synthesizer Dance Pop]
[Woman]
Please don't start to wonder why
You know I love you
Would I lie to you
I don't know what I'm gonna do
Should I put all my faith in you
Believe what you say is true
Cross my heart and hope to die
I'm just lookin'
here's nothing cookin'
Please don't start to wonder why
You know I love you
You know I love you
Cross my heart and hope to die
I'm just lookin'
here's nothing cookin'
Please don't start to wonder why
You know I love you
Would I lie to you
[Ends]
English - US - PSD