Crazy Rich Asians (2018) Movie Script
1
Be careful, your fingers.
If you didn't make us walk,
we wouldn't be soaked.
May I help you?
This is the Calthorpe.
A private hotel.
I'm Mrs. Eleanor Young.
I have a reservation at the
Lancaster Suite.
We spoke on the phone
when I confirmed it yesterday.
Sorry, don't seem to
have your reservation.
Good evening,
I'm Reginald Ormsby,
hotel manager.
Is there a problem?
I'm Mrs. Eleanor Young.
My family and I would like
to be shown to our suite.
We've had a long flight.
We're fully booked, madam.
You must've made a mistake.
I'm sure you and your lovely family
can find other accommodations.
May I suggest you
explore Chinatown?
You can explore Hell.
You dog turd.
Please, may I use your
phone to call my husband?
It's the least you can do.
Mrs. Young, I must
ask you to leave
or I'll have to call the police.
Please, go right ahead.
Lord Calthorpe, my apologies
for this disturbance...
Eleanor!
I've just gone off the
phone with your husband.
Get the Lancaster
Suite ready, now.
Surely, you're joking, sir?
I assure you, I'm not.
As of this evening,
my family's long history
as custodians of the Calthorpe
is ended.
I am selling the hotel
to my dear friends,
the Young family of Singapore.
Meet the new Lady of the House,
Eleanor Young.
Join me for a toast?
We'd be delighted.
Do get a mop.
The floor's wet.
Get a mop!
I'm all in.
Fold.
Nothing?!
This whole time
you had nothing?
All right, so, how did
I beat TA Curtis
so very, very badly?
Well, I know for
a fact that Curtis
is cheap.
So he's not playing
using logic or math,
but using his psychology.
Our brains so hate
the idea of losing
something that's valuable to us
that we abandon all
rational thought
and make some really
poor decisions.
So Curtis wasn't
playing to win,
he was playing not to lose.
Here, put it towards
that haircut.
All right, that's it for today.
Don't forget, your essays
on conditional probability
are due next week.
Oh, lots of money
That's what I want
A lot of money
That's what I want
Yes!
You know what?
You can order your own.
Mmm, I'm okay
with coffee, thanks.
Yeah, well, you
always say that,
and then you end up
eating all my dessert.
I don't even know what
you're talking about, 'cause
- I had like a tiny bit.
- Uh-huh, okay.
Could we have one more
of these, please? Thank you.
So, what about us
taking an adventure East?
You want to get pork buns
in the East Village.
That's what it is, isn't it?
I was actually thinking of
further east.
Like Queens?
Like Singapore for spring break.
Colin's wedding.
We've been dating
for over a year now,
and I think it's about time people
met my beautiful girlfriend.
Come on, I'm Colin's best man.
Don't you want to see
where I grew up?
Meet my family...
My Ah Ma.
And meet up with that strange
college roommate of yours.
- Peik Lin.
- Mm-hmm.
She has been begging me
to come visit her, you know.
The universe has spoken.
It wants you over there.
Come to Singapore.
I want the whole island to
meet the brilliant Rachel Chu.
Aww.
"If then you have been
raised with Christ,
"seek the things that are above
"where Christ is seated
at the right hand of God.
"Set your minds on
things that are above,
"not on things that
are on earth."
Eleanor, is Nicky bringing
a girl to Colin's wedding?
My Amanda heard it from
her friend Francesca.
Eddie says her name
is Rachel Chu.
Oh, I thought that
Nick was coming alone.
Did you know
he had a girlfriend?
Nick dates many girls.
It's hard to keep track.
Amanda knows everyone,
and she's never heard of her.
Rachel Chu...
Or maybe she's from the
Taiwan Plastics Chu family?
If you want, I have
a private investigator.
Very discreet.
I think we should return
to the Word of God.
Alix?
Ephesians,
chapter six, verse four.
"Bring up your children
"in the discipline and
instruction of the Lord."
Oh, I do hope she's
a good Christian girl.
Well, if he's bringing her home,
it must be serious.
Exactly.
It's my mum. Do you mind?
- No, go ahead.
- All right.
- Save me some of that.
- Mmkay.
Hey, Mum. Everything okay?
Does something have to
be wrong for me to call?
Yeah, usually.
Hahaha. Very funny.
Are you bringing the girl you're
seeing to Colin's wedding?
Hmm.
We were literally
just talking about that.
How could you know?
Everybody knows.
Radio One Asia.
Move on to Corinthians.
I'll catch up.
Yes.
We're looking forward
to having you home.
And your room is all ready...
for you.
Thanks, Mum...
but Rachel and I will be
staying together.
I see.
Well, I'm having
the house redone,
and it's not ready for guests.
If Rachel comes, I think she
might be more comfortable
staying somewhere else.
All right. Sorry about that.
- I saved you a piece.
- You did, did you?
A very small piece at that.
Thank you very much.
How's your mom?
Everything okay?
Couldn't be better.
Hey, Mom, this one's kinda cute.
What do you think?
No, no, no, no!
You can't wear that
to meet Nick's Ah Ma.
Blue and white is for
Chinese funerals.
Now this, this symbolizes
good fortune and fertility.
Great!
I was really going for that
lucky baby-maker vibe.
Hey, you were the one
who asked for my help
picking out a dress
to meet Nick's family.
It's only 'cause I hardly
know anything about them.
Every time I bring them up,
Nick changes the subject.
Maybe he's embarrassed.
Maybe his parents are poor
and he has to send them money.
That's what all good
Chinese children do.
Oh, you are going to
have a wonderful time.
You've always wanted
to go to Asia.
And who knows, if all
goes well in Singapore,
you might just come
back with a souvenir.
Mom, stop!
Nick and I haven't even
talked about that.
I mean, his parents can't
not like me, right?
What was that look?
I saw that.
Nothing.
It's just Nick bringing a girl
all the way there to meet them
can mean a lot to these
overseas families.
They're different from us.
How are they different?
They're Chinese, I'm Chinese.
I'm so Chinese, I'm an
economics professor
with lactose intolerance.
Yeah, but you grew up here.
Your face is Chinese.
You speak Chinese.
But here,
and here...
You're different.
But wearing a lucky color
will make a good first impression.
Okay, game plan:
Check our bags,
get to security,
and then we could eat
one of the three
homemade Tupperware meals
my mom packed for us.
Good afternoon,
Mr. Young, Miss Chu.
We'll take your bags and get
you checked into first class.
- Great.
- Oh...
No, there's a mistake.
We're not first class.
We're economy people.
This way, please.
Just go with it.
Come on.
- What...?
- They'll be fine, just leave 'em there.
Welcome aboard,
Mr. Young, Miss Chu.
Here's the way
to your private suite.
And some champagne.
Thank you.
- Thank you very much.
- You're welcome.
After takeoff, would you like
to enjoy the lounge chairs,
or shall we convert your
suite into a bedroom?
Uh... We're good, thank you.
Enjoy.
- Nick...
- Mm?
We can't afford this.
These pajamas are fancier
than any of my real clothes.
My family has business
with the airline.
The tickets... they're a perk.
What kind of business?
Real estate, investment,
other things.
Nothing interesting.
Dim sum.
So, your family is like...
rich?
Um, we're comfortable.
That is exactly what a super
rich person would say.
It's not a big deal, obviously.
I just...
think it's kind of weird
that I had no idea.
I mean, you have
a Jamba Juice card.
You use my Netflix password.
You play basketball at that
Y that kind of smells.
I really like that place,
thank you very much.
And yes, my family
has money, but
I've always thought of it
as theirs, not mine.
I get that, but
I'm going all the way
over there to meet them.
Can't I just want to know
what I'm getting into?
I'm... you know,
they're your family.
Well, um...
My family's most
like anybody else's.
Mm-hmm.
There's half of them that
you love and respect and...
then there's the other half.
Which half am I meeting?
Well, there's my
cousin, Alistair,
based in Taiwan,
works in movies.
And cut!
He's dating Kitty Pong,
an actress.
Kitty.
You like it?
I was feeling very,
very into emotions.
You feel it?
Oh, I could feel all of you.
Get on with me.
She's terrible.
Can't we get someone else?
He's financing the whole movie.
You tell him his girlfriend sucks.
Okay, what about
your cousin Eddie?
You don't ever talk about him.
Well, Eddie's a big
finance guy in Hong Kong.
A real family man.
You know, if you move,
it would look more natural.
No. This way, you get
our optimal angles.
Ah, very well then.
Russell, thank you so much.
It's an honor to be
photographed by you.
My pleasure. People will love it
in the next Hong Kong Vogue.
Thank you, Russell.
Hong Kong Vogue?
I knew it. Your dress
is a disaster.
If you'd worn a Bottega
gown like I told you to,
we'd be in the American Vogue.
You can wear that
gown to hell, Eddie.
Then there's Astrid.
Oh, I remember Astrid.
She's like who I want to be
when I grow up.
Astrid is awesome.
And she's probably the only
one I'm actually close with.
She's really grounded
and down-to-earth
once you get to know her.
Not only did she graduate
top of her class at Oxford,
start multiple charities
and is a fashion icon,
Astrid has the biggest heart
of any of my cousins.
Mommy, see what I mean?
No, not now.
Hi, I'm Astrid.
What's your name?
Pippa.
And who's this?
Bun-bun.
Well, I think Bun-bun looks
very dashing with his bow.
- You have a good eye.
- Thank you.
Miss Teo, right this way.
Very nice to meet you, Pippa.
These are all brand new
from Antwerp.
You're the first person
I've shown it to.
What are those?
Those?
Those are very special.
Burmese pearl drop earrings.
Set with emeralds
and rare, pigeon
blood-red rubies.
They were worn by
Queen Zubriella
at her self-anointed
coronation in 1878.
How much?
Having you
wear one of my pieces
is better publicity
than I can buy.
I'll let them go at cost.
$1.2 million.
Since you have all
this family there,
why are we staying
at a hotel?
Aren't good Chinese sons
supposed to stay
with their parents?
Well...
Just, A:
I'm not that good a son.
B:
I just want you to myself.
Just for a bit.
That okay?
Okay.
Wow, I can't believe this
airport has a butterfly garden,
and a movie theater.
JFK's just salmonella
and despair.
Nick! Nick!
- Oh!
- Araminta!
- We've missed you!
- Missed you too!
- Rachel!
- Hi!
It's so nice to finally meet you.
It's so nice to meet you, too.
- Ah, Nicky-Nick!
- Too long, brother.
It has been too long.
Welcome back.
You guys didn't
have to pick us up.
Of course, we did!
We had to.
Of course I had to welcome
my best man properly.
- Hi, Rachel!
- Hello!
Oh, lovely to finally meet you.
Nice to meet you, too.
Shall we? Let me
help you with this.
- Yes. I'll grab these.
- These are for you.
Are you hungry?
I'm always hungry.
So let's eat
everything we can.
Welcome!
I am bloody starving!
Thank you.
Guys, here!
Oh, thank you.
Each of these local stalls
sells pretty much one dish
and they've been perfecting
it for generations.
You know this is one of the
only places in the world
where street food vendors
actually earned Michelin stars.
- Hey!
- Uncle.
How you doing?
Long time no see!
There you go.
Thank you very much, sir.
Look at this. Look at this.
Oh! My favorite.
Then there's beer...
Looks a little vomit-y.
- Oh!
- Yes!
I told you! I told you.
Best satay on the island,
for sure.
All right, dig in, guys.
Oh, before I forget,
I need your help tomorrow.
Uh, I need you to do
some groomsman stuff
and I don't want to do it
alone with Bernard Tai.
I still cannot believe
that you got that guy
to be your groomsman.
Thank you! Thank you.
I rest my case.
Well, it wasn't
up to me, was it?
It's not my choice.
Bernard is the human
douche nozzle
who used to steal my top shot
money when we were kids.
Until Nicky-Nick beat him up.
- Well. Hold on.
- You beat somebody up?
I threw a single punch,
I fell on the floor
and the guy sat on me, so.
It wasn't really much of a fight.
A toast, guys.
To my best man, Nick Young...
Can't fight for nuts.
But, he'll always have your back.
A toast... to married life?
- Oh!
- Oh, not yet!
Not yet. Too early.
- This time next week, guys.
- Whoo!
We gotta get over your
bachelor party first, matey.
Is that necessary?
Listen, Rachel...
I know we've only just met.
But it's my bachelorette
party this weekend
and I would love
for you to come.
That'll be amazing.
- Thank you, so much.
- Good, good.
- Why am I out of the picture?
- Thanks, man.
Yes, I've replaced
you with Bernard.
Also, I have to say,
I can't remember the last
time I saw Nick like this.
That's funny, though.
He's just happy to be home.
Oh, yeah, he's just
happy to be home...
with you.
Your dad will be
the death of you.
My dad will be the death of me.
Oh, cheers to that.
- Guys, we have to dig in 'cause
- Okay.
this crab is not gonna eat itself.
Try some of this.
Oh, thank you.
It's really spicy!
Whoo!
Nightlife Singapore!
It's good to be home.
- Is Michael here?
- Not yet, ma'am.
Also, your son woke up,
he wants to see you.
All right.
You know what to do.
Quickly.
Sorry, got stuck in a meeting.
It's okay, I get it.
Don't forget, wedding
festivities start on Wednesday
so, no emergencies
next week.
I know.
I wouldn't dream of
missing a second
with your family
and their friends.
Well, it won't be all bad.
Nick and his new
girlfriend will be there.
You'll like her.
Oh, yeah? Why?
Because she's a
commoner like me?
You know that's
not what I meant.
You know, I thought
I caught the maids
trying to shove a pair of
Jimmy Choos behind the dryer.
Yeah.
I don't know why you bother
trying to hide your
shopping from me.
You can buy
whatever you want.
I get it.
Besides,
everybody knows you wear the
money-pants in this family.
Pants are overrated.
Oh, I got you something too.
To celebrate the launch
of your startup.
I know you don't like
expensive gifts, but
you're not a captain in
the army anymore.
You're a CEO.
You should look the part.
I...
I love it.
Thank you.
You're all
I need
To get by
Mmm.
Mm, what time is it?
Good morning.
It's time for me to do
some groomsman duties.
Ahh...
Stay in bed.
You stay here. I'll get
you a breakfast tray.
You know what,
I should get up too.
I told Peik Lin I would
meet up with her today.
Ah, little college reunion.
But don't forget, dinner
at Ah Ma's tonight.
- Mm-hmm.
- My whole family's gonna be there.
- Yes.
- I can't wait to show you off.
Hubba hubba!
How can I resist?
Ooga ooga!
Put your glasses on,
won't you?
You're all
You're all I need
To get by
You're all
I need
Whoa
To get by
Yeah
New York in the house!
Dig it!
Oh, Peik Lin!
What up, bitch?! Yeah!
Oh, my God,
you look amazing.
I know. Some things
never change, right?
And this is... quite a place.
Astor! Vanderbilt!
Rockefeller!
Naughty, naughty boys,
stop barking!
Hey, Rachel!
Hi!
Singapore's so hot.
Come in, enjoy the air-con.
Come, come on!
The whole family
waiting to meet you.
Very excited.
Rachel!
Welcome, welcome!
Wow! Oh, my gosh!
Your house is amazing,
Mrs. Goh.
You're such a sweet talker.
Call me Auntie.
Auntie Neenah.
Sorry. Auntie Neenah.
We were inspired by
the Hall of Mirrors in Versailles.
And Donald Trump's bathroom.
- Really?
- Yeah.
You like it or not?
Oh, yes!
The gold is very...
brilliant.
Uh, uh, Rachel Chu,
we are so... uh, grateful for
all the help you
have given my, uh...
Peik Lin
back in her uni days.
W-Without you, uh, she
would be a hot mess.
Oh, my God, no.
Actually, if it wasn't for her,
I'd be a big mess.
She was a huge help
to me in college.
Nice to meet you, Mr. Goh.
Nice to meet you, too, Chu.
Coo coo... ca Chu?
You...
poo poo?
I'm just kiddin'.
I don't have an accent.
I'm just messin' with you.
No, no, I-I studied
in the States, too.
Yeah, Cal-State Fullerton.
Yeah, I majored in thought.
Mmm.
Don't stand on ceremony, Rachel.
This is simple food, lah.
Ha, cha-cha-cha.
Don't be shy!
- Oh.
- You're not a model.
- No, definitely not.
- No, you're not.
Not at all. Far from it.
Make sure you eat it all.
'Cause I'm watching you.
- Okay.
- Thank you.
Apa, can we go trampoline?
Uh, you haven't finished
your nuggets yet, sweetie.
Okay, there's a lot of children
starving in America. Right?
I mean, take a look at
her, she's American.
Huh? Really skinny.
You wanna look like that?
No!
Then eat our nuggets!
So, Rachel, what
you do in America?
Um, I'm an economics professor.
Whoa.
Very impressive!
Econ professor, eh?
Wow, you must be very smart.
Good for you!
Let me get this straight.
You both went to
the same school.
Yet someone came back
with a degree that's useful.
And the other one came
back as Asian Ellen.
Psst, P.T.!
Look at her.
She's a hottie.
This is the kind of girl
you should date.
Smart, beautiful.
Not those like, K-pop
skanks with like, no brain,
big eyes,
and small back sides.
She has an amazing
back side.
This is gold standard.
Don't be shy.
Just talk to her.
I love you.
Pa, she's here with her boyfriend.
I don't see
no ring on her finger.
Uh, my boyfriend's
actually from Singapore.
And that's why we're here.
We're here to go to his
best friend's wedding
where he's gonna
be the best man.
Hmm.
What's his name?
This is a very small island.
Maybe we know his family.
His name is Nick Young.
The Nick you're dating
is Nick Young?
His best friend...
You're invited to Colin
Khoo's wedding, eh?
Yeah, you guys know
them, or something?
Hellz yeah!
The Khoos, the Youngs,
I mean, who doesn't
know who they are?
They're just the
biggest developers
in all of Singapore!
And Malaysia, Thailand,
Brunei, New Mexico...
She gets it.
Colin and Araminta's
wedding is like
Singapore's event
of the century.
The Youngs are like royalty.
Did you not know?
Did she not know?
Why you never say before?
Do tell, what are they like?
I don't really know what...
I mean, I haven't met them yet.
I'm gonna meet them tonight.
I'm going to Nick's
grandma's house.
You're going to Nick's
grandma's house wearin' this?
Wearin' that?
Great. Great.
I thought red was
a lucky color, right?
Yeah, if you're an envelope.
Zing!
Nailed it.
Zing!
Rachel, these people
aren't just rich.
Okay? They're crazy rich.
Look.
There's new money
all over Asia.
You got the Beijing billionaires,
the Taiwan tycoons...
but the Young family,
they're old-money rich.
They had money
when they left China
in the 1800s.
And they went
all the way down here.
Not there... here.
They came to Singapore
when there was nothing but
jungle and pig farmers.
And there was a snake
here eating an apple.
You know what I mean?
And they built all of this.
Now, they're the landlords of the
most expensive city in the world.
Here you go.
These people are so
posh and snobby...
they're snoshy.
Here you go.
Yeah, but Nick's not like that.
Even if he isn't,
I guarantee you, the family is.
That's why tonight,
you need to not look like
Sebastian of The Little Mermaid.
You know the little crab guy?
Look at this guy,
he's sleeping!
Come on!
This isn't your grandma's road.
Goddammit.
Thank you for driving me.
Duh, this is like, my one chance
to see the Young family mansion.
In the next intersection,
make a u-turn.
Make a u-turn.
Are uh, are you sure
you gave me the right address?
The GPS says there's, like,
nothing here.
Like, literally nothing.
I mean, I copied and pasted
the exact address.
You copied and you pasted it?
Yeah.
Did you just copy
and paste "jungle"
and just kinda
threw it in there?
No, it's just the same...
You actually used the...
Okay!
All right, that's uh... Hi!
So, we'll just...
Hello, sir, how are you?
We're here for
the party, and... we're...
We come in peace.
Do you know where the
Young family house is?
Nicholas Young?
I'm-I'm Rachel Chu.
I'm here to...
Uh, Rachel Chu for the west.
There's a west.
He's on the phone.
He's on the phone.
Is that a gun knife?
It's a knife gun.
It's a... okay!
And there's a friend.
Hi! Very nice.
We can go though?
We're going through? Okay.
Don't stab the car.
Thank you, bye!
Oh, my God, it's beautiful.
Beautiful? 200 mil
worth of real estate.
Spectacular.
Damn, Rachel.
He's like the Asian Bachelor.
Hi, gorgeous.
Wow.
I think I've just fallen in
love with you all over again.
Mhrm-Hrrhm...
Rachel!
Missed you too.
What you've been up to?
Psst, Rachel!
Oh, uh, this is my friend,
Peik Lin.
- Hey, there.
- Howdy!
Thank you very much
for bringing Rachel.
Oh, no worries.
Do you wanna stop by
for some dinner?
- Oh, no, I couldn't impose.
- No, it's not a problem.
- I had some dinner plans.
- Seriously.
Yeah, I'd fuckin' love to.
Nope.
You have a cocktail dress
in your trunk?
I'm not an animal, Rachel.
I thought this was
just a family thing.
Grandmother's invited some of
her friends over tonight.
The tan huas are blooming.
It's a whole thing.
You ready for this?
Oh, damn, Nick.
This is a party though. Okay.
The good bathrooms
are up the stairs
and you can get
changed in there.
Okay, got it.
I'll find it, thank you.
You know when you said
you grew up in your
grandma's house?
I wasn't expecting this.
Thank you.
Oh, no, no, no!
Those are for your fingers.
Thank you very much.
A little bit much, I know.
This place is gorgeous.
I mean, the rolling green hills.
I mean, there are armed
guards out there.
And a giant tiger.
Okay.
That... is Mr. Harima.
Uh, my great grandfather
actually shot him
when he ran into the house.
Astrid and I used to
find cigarettes in his paws.
Do you want to head in?
Actually, I wanted to bring
you over to my mum first.
Come on.
Mum.
You need a haircut.
So unkempt.
And you look tired
from your trip.
I'm going to ask the cook
to make you some herbal soup.
I'll send it to the hotel later.
Mum, this is Rachel Chu.
Oh, my gosh, I...
I'm so happy
to meet you, Mrs. Young.
Or uh... Auntie... Right?
I'm just learning the thing...
I'm very glad
to finally meet you, too.
And I'm sorry Nick's
father couldn't be here.
He was called to
business in Shanghai.
I told Rachel, when duty calls,
Dad answers.
As it should be.
Nick tells me
you're a professor, too.
What do you teach?
Um, I teach economics.
And she's brilliant.
NYU's youngest faculty member.
So, economics.
Sounds challenging.
Are your parents
academics as well?
Uh, no.
Well, my dad actually
died before I was born.
And my mom didn't even
go to college.
She actually hardly
spoke any English
when she immigrated
to the United States.
But she worked really hard.
And she studied and she
earned her real estate license
while she was waiting tables,
supporting us.
Now, she likes
to say that she's
Flushing's top
real estate broker.
A self-made woman.
She must be
so proud of you.
Well, she knows that I'm
passionate about what I do,
and she's always
wanted that for me.
Pursuing one's passions.
How American.
Well, you mother's
very open-minded.
Not like here,
where parents are obsessed
with shaping the lives
of their children.
That's dinner.
Go ahead.
I'll be out in a minute.
Rachel, it was lovely
meeting you.
Thank you, you too.
Okay, she hates me.
Takes a little minute
to warm up to her.
- You'll get there.
- A whole minute?
- Nicky!
- Astrid.
Rachel!
Good to see you.
I'm so glad you could make it.
- Michael.
- Nick.
It's so good to see
your face, finally.
This is my husband, Michael.
Nice to meet you. I've
heard so much about you.
Nice to meet you, Michael.
Hey, the golden boy's
back! Nick!
And you must be Rachel.
I'm Edison Cheng.
This is my wife.
- Hi.
- Her name is Fiona.
So I see you've already
met Princess Astrid.
And her little soldier
toy-boy, Mikey.
You know Mikey's a big
shot tech startup guy.
So if you uh, forget your
password, he's your man.
So you're from the Taiwan
Plastics Chus, right?
Wanna punch him in the face.
Just once.
Take a number.
I'll be in there for sure.
- Champagne?
- Thank you.
So, have you prepped
Rachel to face the wolves?
Rachel is a New Yorker.
She lectures millennials
for a living.
I think she'll manage
our family.
You've been away too long.
Okay, sorry, time out.
So you're not from
the Taiwan Chu family?
Nope.
Hong Kong Telecom Chus?
No.
Malaysian packing peanut Chus?
Is that really a thing?
Yeah, it's everywhere...
I'm gonna stop you there.
because I'm gonna
take her on the rounds.
- We'll be back.
- No, wait, hang on!
China instant noodle Chus?
Rachel...
Chu are you?
This is Auntie Alix
and Auntie Felicity.
Hi, it's so nice to meet you.
I've never been to a
tan hua party before.
We love any excuse
to throw a soiree.
Do your parents
like to entertain?
Oh, I'm sorry.
Your mother's single.
Yup.
Auntie Jacqueline, one of
my parents' oldest friends.
I actually met Nick's
father at Cambridge.
So, what line of work
is your father in?
Uh, my father died
before I was born.
But he was a factory
worker in China.
Nicki, is this your girlfriend?
You should hurry up
and get married!
Ah Ma,
thank you for inviting me
to your home.
It is very beautiful.
This is Ling Cheh.
My former nanny.
Look, now's the time we
need all hands on deck.
Please, please, just
do me this favor.
Thank you. Buh-bye.
They started clearing
away dinner.
Your favorites.
Thank you.
You know, if you need
bodies at the office,
I could always come in
and help out.
The glamorous Astrid Leong
working as an assistant?
Mm-hmm.
Wait...
Isn't Araminta's
bachelorette party tomorrow?
And this would be the perfect
excuse to get out of it.
Thank you. Really.
But I've got
everything covered.
Okay.
I forgot to get you a fork.
It's okay, you stay.
I'll go get it.
Michael, I think it's the office.
Oh, my God, Nick, I can't
believe I just did that.
It's fine. I don't think
anybody even noticed.
I freaked out, Nick.
Oh, my God.
- I'm so sorry!
- It's fine, don't worry about it.
Can I have a tissue, please?
Here, go, go. Get changed.
I'll keep Rachel company.
Thank you, Ollie.
You're in good hands.
Give me two minutes.
I'll change.
Okay.
Hi, I'm Rachel.
Oh, I know.
- Rachel! Rachel!
- What?
I heard you thought
Ah Ma was the cook.
Ah!
On the bright side,
you're the talk of the party.
People like your dress.
Oh, I did that.
- Oh!
- I know.
- Chic '70s goddess.
- I know!
It's very disco Cleopatra,
but in a good way.
That's exactly what
I was going for.
Oh, well.
Oliver. I like your shoes.
Oh, thank you.
I'm Peik Lin. Yeah.
- Cheers.
- Yeah.
These are lovely.
They're clip-ons.
Are they?
So, Oliver, are you
a cousin, too?
Mm, well, I'm one of
the poorer Asians.
The rainbow sheep
of the family.
But I make myself useful.
Whatever the Youngs want,
I procure.
Golden Koi fish...
Huanghauli furniture...
A rare Cambodian gong.
Why would they want to buy
a rare Cambodian gong?
Because they can.
Ah Ma insists
all your clothes
be washed and pressed
every two weeks.
This... Hm?
Everything is exactly
as I left it.
Looking for your cigars?
I had them thrown out
years ago.
Never could get anything
past you, can I?
I keep telling Ah Ma
to put your things away.
But she says this room makes
her feel like you're still here.
Well, I got an earful
when you didn't
move back last year.
Your father and I
were really looking forward
to having you home.
He's not getting any younger.
With you on board,
maybe he'll take a day off
once in a while.
I know, Mum.
I'm just not ready yet.
There's things in New York
that I want to see through.
Well, I'm happy
I finally met Rachel.
She is very impressive.
I think so, too.
I thought you
might be excited
that the first girl
that I bring home
is a Chinese professor.
Chinese-American.
You know,
bringing her home,
introducing her
at a large family gathering,
some people may say...
When... there's something
to say about Rachel and me,
you'll be first to hear.
Some things...
I need to figure out
on my own.
Is that an American accent
I'm hearing?
How do I look?
Perfect.
Everyone, everyone!
The tan hua plants
very rarely bloom.
And even then, only at night.
Their beauty is spectacular
but fleeting.
By dawn, they'll be gone.
So come, come.
Oh, someone forgot
to wear a bra.
Kitty Pong. Cousin Alistair's
latest flame.
An actress. Rumor is
she was in a porno.
Two girls,
one Cup O' Noodles.
You know, I thought I would
like that more than I did.
- The book was much better.
- Mm-hmm.
Is it just me or are people like,
staring at me?
Eh, they're just jealous.
You nabbed the crown prince.
Nicky is Ah Ma's favorite.
In line to inherit everything.
No surprise there when
that's the competition.
Oh, speaking of
the grande dame...
There you are.
Been looking all over for you.
Are you ready to meet
my grandmother?
Ah Ma...
Nicki, you're home!
Not coming to see your Grandma
for so long.
I'm glad I'm still alive.
Did you eat yet?
You've become too skinny.
That's because
I miss your cooking.
Ah Ma,
this is my good friend,
Rachel Chu.
Ah Ma,
thank you for inviting
me to your home.
Nick always talks about you.
He says no one in the world
makes better dumplings.
It's nothing.
I can show you
how to make them, too.
I would be honored.
You must come back soon then,
when there are not so many
craning necks around.
Look, they're in full bloom!
It's so nice having
Nick back home.
But he seems... different.
When children are away
from home too long,
they forget who they are.
What's up, lot? Yeah!
Oh! Rachel!
So happy you're here.
Oh!
Oh, my God, your Gap look...
brilliant.
Thanks.
She's coming with me.
Ah, hold on. Kiss.
36 hours, back.
- Mintzy, one piece, please?
- Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Not listening at all.
So, I'm gonna introduce
you to my posse.
We're flying to my mum's
resort in Sumatra.
She's closed down
the whole place
just for us.
We're gonna have
so much fun!
Come on, meet the girls.
Girls, this is Rachel.
- Hi.
- Hi, nice to meet you.
You let Bernard Tai
organize all of this?
Yeah.
- Bernard.
- Hey.
This is for you, asshole.
Tina, Kimmy!
The twins are in the house!
It's easy to make
a killer entrance
when you come
as a matching set.
Hi, we haven't met.
I'm Amanda Ling.
Hi, I'm Rachel Chu.
Oh, you're Nick Young's friend.
- Yeah.
- Word gets around fast here.
You're a professor
at NYU, right?
Yes. Um, what about you?
Oh, I'm a lawyer.
General counsel at the Young
family corporation, actually.
That's very impressive.
Nah, just good,
old-fashioned nepotism.
I grew up with Nick and Colin,
we're family friends.
It's nice to meet you,
Rachel Chu.
Ladies, come on!
Let's go start this party!
Ready?
Let's go.
All I wanted was a weekend
away with my boys...
and some beer.
Maybe some rugby.
Don't worry.
It's gonna be great
whatever happens.
Let's make some babies!
No.
I don't think it will be.
Any asshole can plan
a normal stag party.
Hookers, drugs, dog fighting.
That's minor league shit.
To organize a party
this massive...
Takes a massive asshole.
Takes a goddamn mastermind.
Where exactly is this party?
It's right there.
Bloody hell.
Whoo!
Yes!
Oh, my God, Nick.
What are you worried about?
You don't have to
keep Rachel happy.
She's lucky to be here.
Nice, Eddie.
Oh, what?
So, we'll pretend
that's not the truth?
Are we in some kind of fairytale
story that I don't know about?
Did you find a shoe at midnight
and jump in a pumpkin?
Yo, I got so much shit
about marrying Fiona,
and her parents
own the biggest
shipping company
in Hong Kong.
Hey, Araminta's adorable.
But you think your
dad would be
spending millions
on this wedding
if her parents didn't own
a billion dollar resort chain?
What's Rachel
bringing to the table?
Oh, small tits!
Oh!
Hey, hey, hey.
It's not worth it, man.
They're drunk.
Hey, guys! This is boring.
Massage time.
For you, the bachelor!
You're gonna get one
before this weekend is over.
Or we're gonna tie you up
and shave your ku ku jiao!
Ku ku jiao! Ku ku jiao!
Hey, try this.
We have to get off this ship.
Welcome to paradise.
This is Samsara Island.
This weekend
is about sisterhood
and connecting with the divine
in all of us.
So, I hope you'll all
find your bliss...
starting with...
an all-paid shopping spree
at the fashion boutique!
Rachel! Come on!
Bitch, I saw this first!
You have little tits!
What about you?
Little bitch!
No!
One more minute!
Keep on working
and hurry!
One more minute!
Keep on working
and hurry!
Yup. No one loves free stuff
more than rich people.
Just the one dress for you?
I don't want to lose an arm.
Ooh, well, in that case...
One last touch.
Well, isn't Nick a lucky guy?
Time's up. Next stop...
Spa!
You're a genius, Nicky.
What's a best man for?
I guess that pilot's license
came in handy after all.
- There you go, champ.
- Oh, thank you, sir.
Mmm, I think that is the
best beer I've ever had.
I'm gonna have to
agree with you on that.
You know,
if it wasn't for Araminta,
I'd ask you to marry me.
Although,
there is a little something
that might get in the way of that.
Mm.
- No.
- Yeah.
- Is that real?
- Yes.
- What? Yes!
- Yes.
Yes, man, congratulations!
That is frickin' amazing!
- I'm ready.
- You're ready. You're doing it.
Nick, I'm really
happy for you, man.
Thanks, dude.
Mmm.
I think my masseuse
just got me pregnant.
I can see why Nick put off
coming back to Singapore.
What do you mean?
You know...
He was supposed
to come back last year.
Take over the family business.
His parents freaked out
when he didn't.
But now that he's back,
I'm sure all is forgiven.
But he's not back for good,
I mean, we're just here
for a wedding.
Wow.
But?
No, I'm really happy for you.
Colin, I've known you since
you were in nappies.
I know when there's
something on your mind.
Well, it wasn't that long ago
that you were sure you
were moving back home.
And I mean,
Rachel loves her job
in New York.
Yeah, we're gonna
figure that out.
You're going
to figure it out.
Right.
Rachel, I get it.
It's hard knowing
where you stand
with someone like
Nicholas Young.
He has all that
pressure from his family.
Not just in business, but
in who he's dating.
It's like...
you just never know
what's quite going on
in that gorgeous head of his.
Nick told you that
we were together, right?
It's ancient history now.
All of our families,
particularly his mother,
always wanting us
to get married.
I guess we weren't ready then.
Dude, ever since
primary school,
you were always going to be
the next chairman
of the Young Corporation,
your family's shining heir.
You really think your
family's gonna accept
anything less than that?
I mean, unless you...
No.
Are you thinking
of walking out?
Leaving everything to bloody
Alistair and Eddie?
I'm not walking out
on anything.
I met a girl, I fell in love,
and I want to marry her.
It can't just be one thing
or the other.
Uh, no, no, no, no.
It's not that simple.
You know that.
I really admire you.
It takes guts
coming all the way over here
facing Nick's family.
Especially when Eleanor
isn't exactly in your corner.
Okay, your family aside,
you ever thought about what
your relationship
with Rachel will be like
if you got married?
I mean, okay, y-you're
Nicholas Young.
You're untouchable,
you always have been.
But Rachel's not.
And if she becomes
Mrs. Nicholas Young,
every day for her
is going to be a struggle.
I heard she told Tina that
Nick is a good catch.
So typical.
She's not even that pretty.
It's like, she's never heard
of plastic surgery.
Oh, shit.
Sorry.
You sure she's ready for that?
Rachel?
It's okay. Let's just
forget about those girls.
Camp out here
and order room service.
I'll call security.
No.
I'm not gonna make a scene.
I'm not gonna give 'em
the satisfaction.
I mean,
it was supposed to be
mani-pedis,
cocktails, surf
and pineapples.
This definitely
wasn't on the menu.
Why would Araminta
even have friends like that?
It's just mean.
Well, you grow up
your whole lives together,
you make excuses for people.
Especially the morons.
I mean, I don't like
having to deal with
catty, fish-killing sociopaths.
How did you two
get through all this?
Well, I didn't have it
quite this bad, but
it wasn't pretty.
Well, at least tell me
it gets better.
Of course, it does.
You okay?
Yeah.
Actually...
No.
You could talk to me.
Michael is
having an affair.
I'm really sorry, Astrid.
I thought I was here
to meet your family...
go to your
best friend's wedding...
eat some good food.
Instead, I feel like I'm a
villain in a soap opera
who's plotting to steal
your family fortune.
What happened?
I mean, I met Amanda.
She told me that
everyone here thinks
that I'm the evil person that
prevented you from moving
back to Singapore last year
when I didn't even know
you were supposed to come home.
You have every reason
to be upset.
I'm not done yet.
There's also this
gutted, bloody fish
that Araminta's friends
left for me
at my hotel room
on my bed,
next to the words,
"Catch this,
you gold-digging bitch."
Written in big, fat,
serial-killer letters.
Is that all that happened?
I mean, please tell me
that's all that happened.
You know what? I don't even
care about those stupid girls
with their stupid little designer
handbags and sunglasses.
I don't care about that.
I don't care that your ex-girlfriend
told me all this crap.
It's that you didn't tell me
any of it!
I screwed up.
- Why?
- I really messed up.
Were you trying to test me?
Why would you do that?
I made a mistake.
When we first met,
you had no idea who I was.
Who my family were.
You didn't care.
Yeah, I don't care
about that stupid stuff.
Well, exactly.
You are so different
from all of the women
that I grew up with.
And I love
who I am around you.
And I don't want that to change.
- And that's selfish, I know.
- Mm-hmm.
I'm sorry that you had to
deal with that on your own.
But I'm here now.
And whatever happens,
we'll get through it together.
Dead fish and all.
All right?
It was so gross.
But I buried it.
You dealt with it.
Come here.
You know what? We need
to do something tonight.
We need to do something
that's just you and me. Okay?
- A hundred percent agree.
- Yes.
But...
we do have to go
make some dumplings first.
Okay?
Can we eat them?
You can eat
as many as you like.
Okay, fine.
This is too much.
We're hosting
a rehearsal dinner
not feeding an army.
Better too many than have
people say we're stingy.
So, right.
You put the baby in bed...
You tuck, tuck, tuck...
Same on the other side...
and you give him
a kiss goodnight.
That's so cute.
Then you eat the baby.
You eat the baby.
You gotta make sure
he's cooked.
Did your Ah Ma
teach you that?
She did.
I, on the other hand, was
taught by Grand Auntie Mabel.
You put the Botox
in the face...
and then you
pinch, pinch, pinch
then voila.
You guys all learned
when you were kids?
We didn't have a choice.
We taught you so you'd know
the blood, sweat and tears
it took to raise and
feed you monkeys.
Not like most,
microwaving macaroni and
cheese for their own children.
No wonder they
put their parents
in the old folks home
when they are grown up.
I know.
Ah Ma says if we don't pass
traditions down like this,
they'll disappear.
God forbid we lose the
ancient Chinese tradition of
guilting your children.
It's totally worth it.
Mother used to wait for
me after school with a
nice basket of these.
Lucky you.
Hey, I never got
after-school dumplings.
Well, that's because
Auntie Felicity was doing
after-school migrant
immigration.
Smart-ass.
If your grandfather was alive,
he'd kick you into next week.
Hey, this is Dolce!
Do you speak Cantonese?
No, I don't.
It's just great seeing
you guys all like this.
When I was growing up,
it was just me and my mom.
Which I loved.
Uh, but we didn't really have
a big family like this.
It's really nice.
That's so lovely of
you to say, Rachel.
We are all very lucky
to have each other.
That's a beautiful ring,
Auntie Eleanor.
I've never seen
anything like it.
Nick's father had it made
when he proposed to me.
It's very romantic.
How did you guys meet?
She met him at Cambridge.
Both studying law together.
Oh, I didn't know
you were a lawyer.
I wasn't.
I withdrew from university
when we got married.
I chose to help my
husband run a business,
and to raise a family.
For me, it was a privilege.
But for you, you may think
it's old-fashioned.
It's nice you
appreciate this house,
and us being here together
wrapping dumplings.
But all this
doesn't just happen.
It's because we know
to put family first
instead of chasing
one's passion.
Ah, everyone's here!
Ah Ma.
Ah Ma.
Thank you.
Oh, Nick.
Come and sit.
Oh, Nicki.
You brought Rachel. Good.
I can see you
more clearly in the day.
The shape or your nose
is auspicious.
Let me have a look,
come closer.
Very nice looking.
Sit, sit.
You made those dumplings?
They don't look very good.
You lost your touch.
Oh, hi.
I think I'm a little lost.
This house is pretty big.
I'm glad I found you.
I'm afraid that I've been unfair.
Oh, no. You know what?
I'm sorry I made an assumption.
I didn't mean to offend you.
Not at all.
You asked about my ring.
The truth is, Nick's
father had it made
when he wanted
to propose to me
because Ah Ma wouldn't
give him the family ring.
I wasn't her first choice.
Honestly, I wasn't her second.
Gosh, I'm so sorry.
I had no idea.
I didn't come
from the right family.
Have the right connections.
And Ah Ma thought
I would not make
an adequate wife to her son.
But she came around,
obviously.
It took many years.
And she had good reason
to be concerned.
Because I had no idea
of the work
and the sacrifice it would take.
There were many days
when I wondered
if I would ever measure up.
But having been
through it all,
I know this much:
You will never be enough.
We should head back.
I wouldn't want Nick to worry.
You all right?
Yeah.
I know my mum
can be tough at times, but
there isn't anything
she wouldn't do for me.
And there is a reason why
I lived with Ah Ma growing up.
It's because my mother knew
she wasn't the favorite.
So she let her raise me
so I would be.
You were just a kid?
Yeah.
Well...
It's hard to understand
from the outside.
But she did what she thought
was best for the family.
For everyone involved.
Anyway...
I think I've had
enough with dumplings
for the rest of my life.
What should we do?
Sushi? Movies?
Anything you like, really.
Wait, what? Was she like...
"You will never be good
enough for my son."
Or was it like, "You...
"You... will never be good
enough for my son."
- It's like the second one.
- Oh.
Except for in a way that
made me wanna like,
cry and puke
at the same time.
God, she's a badass.
You know, I bet if you told her
you'd leave Nick
for like, a million dollars,
she would write that check.
They do that around here.
She looked at me like
I was nothing.
Like a 10 million dollar check,
I feel like she would do that.
I don't even know
what I should do.
I mean, I can't even tell Nick
because he like, worships her.
Yeah. Chinese sons think their
moms fart Chanel No. 5.
What about the Ah Ma?
She hate your face, too?
Okay, nobody said
they hated my face.
And Ah Ma, she liked my face.
She said I had a lucky nose.
That's great!
You know, Eleanor can
hate you all day long,
but she can't be 2,000 years
of Chinese filial piety.
I feel like I shouldn't even
go to the wedding.
You know, it's Colin
and Araminta's day.
I don't wanna cause
any drama there.
I feel like I should just...
sit it out.
You know? Tell Nick I had
food poisoning, or something.
What?
That's bullshit.
- You're just scared.
- No, I'm not.
Okay, here's what you need
to understand, all right?
It's not about getting
Eleanor to like you.
It's about getting her to
respect you.
All right? Right now, she
just thinks you're some like,
undeserving, clueless,
gold-digging,
Yeah, I got it.
trashy, unrefined banana.
Yellow on the outside,
and white on the inside.
I know what a banana is.
When in reality, you're like a
super sophisticated, smart
professor of freaking
game theory.
Show her that side of you,
you know?
- You're right.
- Damn straight, I'm right.
It's Peik Lin. I'm always right.
Yeah, she's like trying to play
a game of chicken with me.
Where she's like,
coming at me and like,
thinking I'm gonna
swerve like a chicken.
But you can't swerve!
I'm not gonna swerve,
not for her.
No, chickens are bitches, dude.
And I'm not a chicken.
You're not a chicken.
You gon' roll up to that wedding
you gon' be like,
bok-bok, bitch.
Bok-bok, bitch.
Chickens are bitches!
Sorry, Uncle.
What are you doing tonight?
Ah, I was gonna go to
FedEx or somethin'.
Why?
Oh!
I have been waiting to do
this properly for so long!
I'm thinkin' eyebrow triage,
root crimps, maybe
some eyelid tape.
What do you think?
Ugh, all of it.
And I would throw in
a Korean snail face mask.
Sweetie, your skin is so dry,
it's hurting my face.
Thank you.
You know, it's about time
someone stood up
to Auntie Eleanor.
Well, you, not me. Oh, God.
She can't know
I was over here.
- Oh, no.
- Right. Well.
Okay, let's get to work.
Cappuccinos.
Pull the plum Balenciaga,
the peach Cleary,
the Jean Baptiste,
all the Bottegas.
And a case of bubbly
to keep us tucked and ruffled.
And a sandwich for Peik Lin.
Oh, okay. All right.
I'm not sure if it's working
or if she looks like
a clown's tampon.
On a heavy day.
You look like a flower.
Like a sad, lonely flower
no one wants to be around.
Ah!
I mean, it's the
wedding of the century
so, of course, we're here.
- Hmm.
- Ow.
It's not that... bad...
It's holding you up.
A hands-on dress,
you know what I mean?
Incoming.
Taipei Tiger 2 is going
to redefine the genre.
She's a star.
She's a star.
Oh!
I'm blinded by the light.
This is why disco died.
You kinda look like a slutty
Ebola virus.
Like a bag of Skittles.
"Taste the rainbow."
I just think if you could just,
maybe just
tell her this is coming from you.
She probably doesn't
wanna hear it from a guy.
Okay.
Okay, remember,
optimal angles.
Everyone about,
Rachel Chu of New York!
Rachel Chu of New York!
Rachel! Rachel, please!
Okay, ladies, looking good.
Looking good.
Out of the way, please.
Out of the way.
- You look gorgeous!
- Thank you.
Over there.
Ladies.
- Amanda.
- Hmm.
You're in my way.
Our Chinese investors
are getting nervous.
I have to fly into
Shenzhen on Monday
to try and talk them down.
It's Cassian's birthday.
Yeah, I know.
I hate to miss it.
But this is important.
Don't you think your son's
birthday's important?
Let someone else handle it.
Unless...
there's another reason
you're out of town.
What are you saying?
I know you're having an affair.
Jesus, Astrid.
Let's just...
get through the wedding
and we'll deal with it after.
I don't want to make a scene.
You find out I'm having an
affair with another woman
and you're worried
about making a scene?
You'd rather
I scream and carry on?
Yes.
Honestly, I wish you would.
It would show
you care about more
than what people thought
of you and your family.
Don't try and turn this on me.
I'm not the one
who screwed up.
Of course not.
You're always the prettiest,
richest, most perfect
girl in the room
while I'm just this lucky bastard
who'll never measure up.
Don't say that!
I know what you're
thinking, Astrid.
That's why
you hide your shoes,
the jewelry you buy.
As if every minute of my life
I'm not reminded of it.
I'm just tired.
I'm tired of having
nothing I do matter.
Including having that affair.
Of course
what you do matters.
God, how can you say that?
Hmm.
Is this a church
or a paddy field?
They spent $40 million
on the wedding.
Really? That's too much.
We're Methodist.
$20 million is our limit.
I know.
Princess Intan.
Vicious woman.
I heard she demanded
a whole row to herself
so she wouldn't be
bothered by anyone.
Really?
Who is that?
Aunties.
Rachel.
How lovely to see you.
The pleasure's all mine.
I'm sorry.
Our row is full.
I love it.
Bok-bok.
Okay.
Princess Intan.
Rachel Chu.
I read your great article
about micro loans
in the Asian Economics Journal.
I received so much criticism
about that article.
Well, you know what?
I think your critics
missed the point.
'Cause your micro loans
help women.
And women lift up economies.
What is your name again?
Rachel Chu.
It's a pleasure to meet you.
Now what brings you here?
I followed a boy...
Ah Ma is here.
She never comes
to these things.
Thank you, Grandma.
Family never says thank you.
How you feeling?
- Good.
- Don't be nervous.
- I'm not nervous.
- You look great.
Thank you.
Hey, man, Rachel's
not sitting with your family.
Yeah. I don't blame her.
Mother hasn't exactly
been the most welcoming.
But I'm sure she'll be out
back somewhere, laying low.
Mm, she's right at the front.
Take a look.
I think you've got a fighter.
Guys, it's time.
Hey, make sure she
doesn't take your balls.
Oh!
Just joking!
Thanks for dressing up.
Hey, it's not about me.
Come on. Thanks, Bernard.
It's not about me.
Wise men say
Only fools rush in
But I can't help
Falling in love
With you
Shall I stay?
Would it be a sin?
For I can't help
Falling in love
With you
Like a river flows
Surely to a sea
Darling, so it goes
Some things
Are meant to be
So take my hand
Take my whole life, too
For I can't help
Falling in love
With you
For I
Can't help
Falling in love
With
You
You look spectacular,
you know that?
It's the double Spanx.
I can't breathe.
It's not the clothes.
It's you.
Uh, excuse me.
Suppose using you
to dance us out, come on!
- Come on, Nicky-Nick.
- All right.
- Oliver.
- Hmm. Yes, Auntie.
Be a dear
and take care of that.
As you wish.
You know, you should
wear a tux more often.
Like all the time?
Yeah.
You know, when you're
playing basketball at the Y.
Shaving.
Brushing your teeth.
Alistair, your father's
looking for you.
Something about an overdrawn
discretionary account.
Oh, my God.
Baby!
Oh, hi.
- So?
- Hmm?
How do you like the wedding?
Oh, my gosh, it's so glamorous!
When it's Alistair's and my wedding,
I want it just like this.
No, no. I want it big!
Bigger! Better!
Sweetie.
You'd be lucky if Alistair's
parents give you a tea ceremony.
You know Alistair's
only the fourth son
of a penny-pinching
family, don't you?
He'll get next to nothing.
You want a wedding like this,
you should fall in love
with an only child.
Someone like...
Bernard Tai.
Master Nicholas.
Your grandmother would like to
speak to you and Miss Rachel.
Okay.
- Sick party.
- Yeah.
Hold that.
Ah Ma, Mum.
What's all this about?
Rachel.
I've only know you a short time,
but it's clear
you're a very smart woman.
But, I will not permit you to ruin
my grandson with your ambition.
Ah Ma!
I'm sorry to tell you, but
Rachel has been lying to us
about her family
and her mother.
What-What are you
talking about?
I hired a private investigator
- Mom, you didn't.
- to look into her past.
She said her father
passed away
- in China.
- Mum!
But that's not true.
Your mother's husband
is very much alive.
During her marriage,
she cheated on him
and became pregnant with
another man's child.
And before he found out,
she ran away to America.
- It's all in here.
- You had no right!
- We had every right.
- You did not!
- You're lying.
- Do you have any idea
the scandal this
would have caused?
For Rachel to hide
something like this?
She wouldn't have.
We cannot be linked
to this sort of family.
I don't want
any part of your family.
Rachel!
Don't chase after her and
degrade yourself.
I forbid it.
If you go with her,
- you can't come back!
- Let me go.
- Rachel!
- Nick!
This is your fault.
You let this happen
by allowing him
to stay away so long.
Now, look!
Hey, Cinderella, what's wrong?
You gotta return the
dress before midnight?
Oliver...
Rachel, have you seen Rachel?
Rachel?
Come and eat breakfast.
You need to eat.
Or...
use the bathroom or...
maybe a shower.
It's there if you need it.
Rachel, this is your dinner.
I'll stop by again tonight.
Rachel, please, just
give me a call.
Anytime.
Please.
Rachel, someone's
here to see ya.
I don't want to see him.
It's not Nick.
Mom!
Drink more.
Dong quai and the ginseng
will give you more energy.
Thanks.
Your spirit has always
been so strong.
Ever since young.
You will get through this.
Why didn't you tell me
about my father?
My husband
wasn't a good man.
He hurt me.
But an old schoolmate of mine
helped me through things.
And we fell in love.
And I got pregnant
with his baby.
That's you.
I was so afraid my
husband would find out
and kill us both, so
I just took you and I ran
to America.
Did you ever
I don't know, think about
trying to talk to him?
I mean, do you think about him?
Every day.
When we first came to America,
all I can think about was
reaching out for him, but...
I was so afraid my
husband would find us.
And now, I...
I just don't want to
cause any trouble.
Then I'm really sorry.
Oh, don't be sorry.
You listen to me.
Everything that happened
in my past life,
is the reason why I got you.
My brave and clever girl.
I really thought he was the one.
Now I just wanna go home.
You know...
Nick was the one who called
me and brought me out here.
Before we go,
I think you should
go and talk to him.
I'll email the photo later.
P.T., how long you've
been standing there?
Just a short while.
I'm so sorry about
everything.
What my mother did to you
is unforgivable.
- It's not your fault.
- It is.
Ever since I can remember,
my family has been my whole life.
And I am done
making excuses for them.
Nick.
Marry me.
Marry me and we'll start a new
life together in New York.
Just you and me.
I'll leave all of this behind.
Thanks for meeting me here.
Don't worry about them.
They're half-deaf and
they only speak Hokkien.
Mmm.
My mom taught me
how to play.
She told me mahjong
would teach me
important life skills.
Negotiation, strategy,
cooperation.
You asked me here...
I assume it's not for
a mahjong lesson.
Pong.
My mother taught me, too.
I know Nick told you
the truth about my mom.
But you didn't like me
the second I got here.
Why is that?
There is a Hokkien phrase,
"Gar gee nang".
It means, our own
kind of people.
And you're not our own kind.
Because I'm not rich?
'Cause I didn't go to a
British boarding school,
or I wasn't born into
a wealthy family?
You're a foreigner.
American.
And all Americans think about
is their own happiness.
Don't you want
Nick to be happy?
It's an illusion.
We understand how to build
things that last.
Something you know
nothing about.
You don't know me.
I know you're
not what Nick needs.
Well, he proposed
to me yesterday.
He said he'd walk
away from his family
and from you for good.
Don't worry,
I turned him down.
Only a fool folds
a winning hand.
There's no winning.
You made sure of that.
Because if Nick chose me,
he would lose his family.
And if he chose his family,
he might spend the rest
of his life resenting you.
So you chose for him.
I'm not leaving
'cause I'm scared.
Or because I think
I'm not enough.
Because maybe for
the first time in my life...
I know I am.
I just love Nick so much.
I don't want him
to lose his mom again.
So, I just wanted you
to know that one day,
when he marries another lucky
girl who is enough for you...
and you're playing
with your grandkids
while the tan huas are blooming
and the birds are chirping...
that it was because of me...
a poor,
raised-by-a-single-mother,
low-class,
immigrant
nobody.
Hey.
I'm gonna send someone
for the rest of my stuff.
But I wanna talk to you about my
visitation rights with Cassian.
Stop talking.
What?
Don't worry about
packing your things.
You bought this apartment,
you keep it.
We're leaving.
What do you mean
you're leaving?
Where you gonna go?
I have 14 apartment
buildings that I own,
so, probably one of those.
And you'll see Cassian
when it's good for him
not when it's good for you.
Hey, look.
You know it's not just my fault
that things didn't work out.
You're right.
I shouldn't have
kept things from you.
Hidden my shoes.
Turned down jobs,
charity work.
Worrying that it might
make you feel lesser than.
But let's be clear.
The problem with our marriage
isn't my family's money.
It's that you're a coward.
You gave up on us.
But I just realized
it's not my job
to make you feel like a man.
I can't make you
something you're not.
Good for you!
Walkin' away from
Nick and his family's
badass property portfolio.
You have no one. No network.
But you have integrity.
That's why I respect you.
Thank you for everything.
- Bye, Mrs. Chu.
- Goodbye. And thank you.
You sure I can't
get you to stay?
You know my brother P.T.'s
still single.
All right.
Rachel!
Rachel!
Stay there!
I'm gonna go look for
some extra blankets.
Hello?
Sorry, just one second.
Nick, what are you doing here?
I'm flying back to
New York with you.
Don't make this harder
than it already is.
I always imagined what me
proposing to you would be like.
You know what?
I had it all planned out.
Right behind you.
Don't mind me.
I bring you to my
favorite spot on the island.
There's a hidden trail
that I used to go to as a child.
And there's a cove there that
opens up to this beautiful
lake.
Sorry, dude.
Give me a second,
coming through.
When the sun hits the horizon,
I get down on one knee.
And the rest of the world
would fall away.
Because it would just be you
and...
Because it's just you...
Sorry, I can help you with that.
Right, stay there.
Yeah. You too?
Watch your fingers.
Everybody okay?
'Cause I just need
30 seconds with this woman.
Thank you.
Coming through. Sorry.
I know this is a far throw
from a hidden paradise.
But wherever you are
in the world,
that's where I belong.
But I...
Rachel Chu...
Will you marry me?
And make me the happiest
man in this world?
Yes! Yes!
She will marry you!
Yes!
- I love you.
- I love you, too.
This is gonna be some
flight back to New York.
Well, I was actually thinking
about staying one more night.
Yo, I'd vote for a good time
I've got that feeling
The feeling too easy
As long as I'm breathin'
I've gotta vote for a good time
Tag your name across the sky
Breathe it in and we can fly
Love for love and love for life
Yeah, so let's vote
Like you just got paid
Spend it all on Mary Jane
It's a celebration
Yeah, so I vote
Oh, and everything's changing
It's got me feeling strange but
We can stand together
Yeah, so just vote
Summer nights
that we were wild
Make the choice
that makes you proud
Make the choice
that makes you proud
Yeah, and vote for a good time
Good time, good time
Yeah, yeah
Oh, I vote
Good time, all right
Good time, good time
La la la, La la la, La la la
O-o-oh
Vote for a good time
Oh-oh-oh, Oh
Yeah, yeah, yeah
Good time, good time
La la la, La la la, La la la
O-o-oh, Oh
Oh, a good time
Good time, good time
Yeah
Oh, I vote
Good time, all right
Good time, good time
La la la, La la la, La la la
Yeah, all right
Vote for a good time
Oh
Vote for a good time
Good time, good time
Oh-oh-oh
Good time, yeah
Yeah, yeah, huh
Good time, good time
La la la, La la la, La la la
O-o-oh, all right
Vote for a good time
So much beauty into nothin'
Sometimes life is ugly
We're all searchin' for somethin'
So let's vote
Late night, don't wait
Make the choice
that sets you free now
Emancipate your mind
You'll be fine
if you just vote
Tag your name across the sky
Breathe it in and we can fly
Love for love and love for life
Good time
For the moments we remember
And the people that we treasure
We can keep it all together, oh
Vote for a good time
subs by enwansix
Be careful, your fingers.
If you didn't make us walk,
we wouldn't be soaked.
May I help you?
This is the Calthorpe.
A private hotel.
I'm Mrs. Eleanor Young.
I have a reservation at the
Lancaster Suite.
We spoke on the phone
when I confirmed it yesterday.
Sorry, don't seem to
have your reservation.
Good evening,
I'm Reginald Ormsby,
hotel manager.
Is there a problem?
I'm Mrs. Eleanor Young.
My family and I would like
to be shown to our suite.
We've had a long flight.
We're fully booked, madam.
You must've made a mistake.
I'm sure you and your lovely family
can find other accommodations.
May I suggest you
explore Chinatown?
You can explore Hell.
You dog turd.
Please, may I use your
phone to call my husband?
It's the least you can do.
Mrs. Young, I must
ask you to leave
or I'll have to call the police.
Please, go right ahead.
Lord Calthorpe, my apologies
for this disturbance...
Eleanor!
I've just gone off the
phone with your husband.
Get the Lancaster
Suite ready, now.
Surely, you're joking, sir?
I assure you, I'm not.
As of this evening,
my family's long history
as custodians of the Calthorpe
is ended.
I am selling the hotel
to my dear friends,
the Young family of Singapore.
Meet the new Lady of the House,
Eleanor Young.
Join me for a toast?
We'd be delighted.
Do get a mop.
The floor's wet.
Get a mop!
I'm all in.
Fold.
Nothing?!
This whole time
you had nothing?
All right, so, how did
I beat TA Curtis
so very, very badly?
Well, I know for
a fact that Curtis
is cheap.
So he's not playing
using logic or math,
but using his psychology.
Our brains so hate
the idea of losing
something that's valuable to us
that we abandon all
rational thought
and make some really
poor decisions.
So Curtis wasn't
playing to win,
he was playing not to lose.
Here, put it towards
that haircut.
All right, that's it for today.
Don't forget, your essays
on conditional probability
are due next week.
Oh, lots of money
That's what I want
A lot of money
That's what I want
Yes!
You know what?
You can order your own.
Mmm, I'm okay
with coffee, thanks.
Yeah, well, you
always say that,
and then you end up
eating all my dessert.
I don't even know what
you're talking about, 'cause
- I had like a tiny bit.
- Uh-huh, okay.
Could we have one more
of these, please? Thank you.
So, what about us
taking an adventure East?
You want to get pork buns
in the East Village.
That's what it is, isn't it?
I was actually thinking of
further east.
Like Queens?
Like Singapore for spring break.
Colin's wedding.
We've been dating
for over a year now,
and I think it's about time people
met my beautiful girlfriend.
Come on, I'm Colin's best man.
Don't you want to see
where I grew up?
Meet my family...
My Ah Ma.
And meet up with that strange
college roommate of yours.
- Peik Lin.
- Mm-hmm.
She has been begging me
to come visit her, you know.
The universe has spoken.
It wants you over there.
Come to Singapore.
I want the whole island to
meet the brilliant Rachel Chu.
Aww.
"If then you have been
raised with Christ,
"seek the things that are above
"where Christ is seated
at the right hand of God.
"Set your minds on
things that are above,
"not on things that
are on earth."
Eleanor, is Nicky bringing
a girl to Colin's wedding?
My Amanda heard it from
her friend Francesca.
Eddie says her name
is Rachel Chu.
Oh, I thought that
Nick was coming alone.
Did you know
he had a girlfriend?
Nick dates many girls.
It's hard to keep track.
Amanda knows everyone,
and she's never heard of her.
Rachel Chu...
Or maybe she's from the
Taiwan Plastics Chu family?
If you want, I have
a private investigator.
Very discreet.
I think we should return
to the Word of God.
Alix?
Ephesians,
chapter six, verse four.
"Bring up your children
"in the discipline and
instruction of the Lord."
Oh, I do hope she's
a good Christian girl.
Well, if he's bringing her home,
it must be serious.
Exactly.
It's my mum. Do you mind?
- No, go ahead.
- All right.
- Save me some of that.
- Mmkay.
Hey, Mum. Everything okay?
Does something have to
be wrong for me to call?
Yeah, usually.
Hahaha. Very funny.
Are you bringing the girl you're
seeing to Colin's wedding?
Hmm.
We were literally
just talking about that.
How could you know?
Everybody knows.
Radio One Asia.
Move on to Corinthians.
I'll catch up.
Yes.
We're looking forward
to having you home.
And your room is all ready...
for you.
Thanks, Mum...
but Rachel and I will be
staying together.
I see.
Well, I'm having
the house redone,
and it's not ready for guests.
If Rachel comes, I think she
might be more comfortable
staying somewhere else.
All right. Sorry about that.
- I saved you a piece.
- You did, did you?
A very small piece at that.
Thank you very much.
How's your mom?
Everything okay?
Couldn't be better.
Hey, Mom, this one's kinda cute.
What do you think?
No, no, no, no!
You can't wear that
to meet Nick's Ah Ma.
Blue and white is for
Chinese funerals.
Now this, this symbolizes
good fortune and fertility.
Great!
I was really going for that
lucky baby-maker vibe.
Hey, you were the one
who asked for my help
picking out a dress
to meet Nick's family.
It's only 'cause I hardly
know anything about them.
Every time I bring them up,
Nick changes the subject.
Maybe he's embarrassed.
Maybe his parents are poor
and he has to send them money.
That's what all good
Chinese children do.
Oh, you are going to
have a wonderful time.
You've always wanted
to go to Asia.
And who knows, if all
goes well in Singapore,
you might just come
back with a souvenir.
Mom, stop!
Nick and I haven't even
talked about that.
I mean, his parents can't
not like me, right?
What was that look?
I saw that.
Nothing.
It's just Nick bringing a girl
all the way there to meet them
can mean a lot to these
overseas families.
They're different from us.
How are they different?
They're Chinese, I'm Chinese.
I'm so Chinese, I'm an
economics professor
with lactose intolerance.
Yeah, but you grew up here.
Your face is Chinese.
You speak Chinese.
But here,
and here...
You're different.
But wearing a lucky color
will make a good first impression.
Okay, game plan:
Check our bags,
get to security,
and then we could eat
one of the three
homemade Tupperware meals
my mom packed for us.
Good afternoon,
Mr. Young, Miss Chu.
We'll take your bags and get
you checked into first class.
- Great.
- Oh...
No, there's a mistake.
We're not first class.
We're economy people.
This way, please.
Just go with it.
Come on.
- What...?
- They'll be fine, just leave 'em there.
Welcome aboard,
Mr. Young, Miss Chu.
Here's the way
to your private suite.
And some champagne.
Thank you.
- Thank you very much.
- You're welcome.
After takeoff, would you like
to enjoy the lounge chairs,
or shall we convert your
suite into a bedroom?
Uh... We're good, thank you.
Enjoy.
- Nick...
- Mm?
We can't afford this.
These pajamas are fancier
than any of my real clothes.
My family has business
with the airline.
The tickets... they're a perk.
What kind of business?
Real estate, investment,
other things.
Nothing interesting.
Dim sum.
So, your family is like...
rich?
Um, we're comfortable.
That is exactly what a super
rich person would say.
It's not a big deal, obviously.
I just...
think it's kind of weird
that I had no idea.
I mean, you have
a Jamba Juice card.
You use my Netflix password.
You play basketball at that
Y that kind of smells.
I really like that place,
thank you very much.
And yes, my family
has money, but
I've always thought of it
as theirs, not mine.
I get that, but
I'm going all the way
over there to meet them.
Can't I just want to know
what I'm getting into?
I'm... you know,
they're your family.
Well, um...
My family's most
like anybody else's.
Mm-hmm.
There's half of them that
you love and respect and...
then there's the other half.
Which half am I meeting?
Well, there's my
cousin, Alistair,
based in Taiwan,
works in movies.
And cut!
He's dating Kitty Pong,
an actress.
Kitty.
You like it?
I was feeling very,
very into emotions.
You feel it?
Oh, I could feel all of you.
Get on with me.
She's terrible.
Can't we get someone else?
He's financing the whole movie.
You tell him his girlfriend sucks.
Okay, what about
your cousin Eddie?
You don't ever talk about him.
Well, Eddie's a big
finance guy in Hong Kong.
A real family man.
You know, if you move,
it would look more natural.
No. This way, you get
our optimal angles.
Ah, very well then.
Russell, thank you so much.
It's an honor to be
photographed by you.
My pleasure. People will love it
in the next Hong Kong Vogue.
Thank you, Russell.
Hong Kong Vogue?
I knew it. Your dress
is a disaster.
If you'd worn a Bottega
gown like I told you to,
we'd be in the American Vogue.
You can wear that
gown to hell, Eddie.
Then there's Astrid.
Oh, I remember Astrid.
She's like who I want to be
when I grow up.
Astrid is awesome.
And she's probably the only
one I'm actually close with.
She's really grounded
and down-to-earth
once you get to know her.
Not only did she graduate
top of her class at Oxford,
start multiple charities
and is a fashion icon,
Astrid has the biggest heart
of any of my cousins.
Mommy, see what I mean?
No, not now.
Hi, I'm Astrid.
What's your name?
Pippa.
And who's this?
Bun-bun.
Well, I think Bun-bun looks
very dashing with his bow.
- You have a good eye.
- Thank you.
Miss Teo, right this way.
Very nice to meet you, Pippa.
These are all brand new
from Antwerp.
You're the first person
I've shown it to.
What are those?
Those?
Those are very special.
Burmese pearl drop earrings.
Set with emeralds
and rare, pigeon
blood-red rubies.
They were worn by
Queen Zubriella
at her self-anointed
coronation in 1878.
How much?
Having you
wear one of my pieces
is better publicity
than I can buy.
I'll let them go at cost.
$1.2 million.
Since you have all
this family there,
why are we staying
at a hotel?
Aren't good Chinese sons
supposed to stay
with their parents?
Well...
Just, A:
I'm not that good a son.
B:
I just want you to myself.
Just for a bit.
That okay?
Okay.
Wow, I can't believe this
airport has a butterfly garden,
and a movie theater.
JFK's just salmonella
and despair.
Nick! Nick!
- Oh!
- Araminta!
- We've missed you!
- Missed you too!
- Rachel!
- Hi!
It's so nice to finally meet you.
It's so nice to meet you, too.
- Ah, Nicky-Nick!
- Too long, brother.
It has been too long.
Welcome back.
You guys didn't
have to pick us up.
Of course, we did!
We had to.
Of course I had to welcome
my best man properly.
- Hi, Rachel!
- Hello!
Oh, lovely to finally meet you.
Nice to meet you, too.
Shall we? Let me
help you with this.
- Yes. I'll grab these.
- These are for you.
Are you hungry?
I'm always hungry.
So let's eat
everything we can.
Welcome!
I am bloody starving!
Thank you.
Guys, here!
Oh, thank you.
Each of these local stalls
sells pretty much one dish
and they've been perfecting
it for generations.
You know this is one of the
only places in the world
where street food vendors
actually earned Michelin stars.
- Hey!
- Uncle.
How you doing?
Long time no see!
There you go.
Thank you very much, sir.
Look at this. Look at this.
Oh! My favorite.
Then there's beer...
Looks a little vomit-y.
- Oh!
- Yes!
I told you! I told you.
Best satay on the island,
for sure.
All right, dig in, guys.
Oh, before I forget,
I need your help tomorrow.
Uh, I need you to do
some groomsman stuff
and I don't want to do it
alone with Bernard Tai.
I still cannot believe
that you got that guy
to be your groomsman.
Thank you! Thank you.
I rest my case.
Well, it wasn't
up to me, was it?
It's not my choice.
Bernard is the human
douche nozzle
who used to steal my top shot
money when we were kids.
Until Nicky-Nick beat him up.
- Well. Hold on.
- You beat somebody up?
I threw a single punch,
I fell on the floor
and the guy sat on me, so.
It wasn't really much of a fight.
A toast, guys.
To my best man, Nick Young...
Can't fight for nuts.
But, he'll always have your back.
A toast... to married life?
- Oh!
- Oh, not yet!
Not yet. Too early.
- This time next week, guys.
- Whoo!
We gotta get over your
bachelor party first, matey.
Is that necessary?
Listen, Rachel...
I know we've only just met.
But it's my bachelorette
party this weekend
and I would love
for you to come.
That'll be amazing.
- Thank you, so much.
- Good, good.
- Why am I out of the picture?
- Thanks, man.
Yes, I've replaced
you with Bernard.
Also, I have to say,
I can't remember the last
time I saw Nick like this.
That's funny, though.
He's just happy to be home.
Oh, yeah, he's just
happy to be home...
with you.
Your dad will be
the death of you.
My dad will be the death of me.
Oh, cheers to that.
- Guys, we have to dig in 'cause
- Okay.
this crab is not gonna eat itself.
Try some of this.
Oh, thank you.
It's really spicy!
Whoo!
Nightlife Singapore!
It's good to be home.
- Is Michael here?
- Not yet, ma'am.
Also, your son woke up,
he wants to see you.
All right.
You know what to do.
Quickly.
Sorry, got stuck in a meeting.
It's okay, I get it.
Don't forget, wedding
festivities start on Wednesday
so, no emergencies
next week.
I know.
I wouldn't dream of
missing a second
with your family
and their friends.
Well, it won't be all bad.
Nick and his new
girlfriend will be there.
You'll like her.
Oh, yeah? Why?
Because she's a
commoner like me?
You know that's
not what I meant.
You know, I thought
I caught the maids
trying to shove a pair of
Jimmy Choos behind the dryer.
Yeah.
I don't know why you bother
trying to hide your
shopping from me.
You can buy
whatever you want.
I get it.
Besides,
everybody knows you wear the
money-pants in this family.
Pants are overrated.
Oh, I got you something too.
To celebrate the launch
of your startup.
I know you don't like
expensive gifts, but
you're not a captain in
the army anymore.
You're a CEO.
You should look the part.
I...
I love it.
Thank you.
You're all
I need
To get by
Mmm.
Mm, what time is it?
Good morning.
It's time for me to do
some groomsman duties.
Ahh...
Stay in bed.
You stay here. I'll get
you a breakfast tray.
You know what,
I should get up too.
I told Peik Lin I would
meet up with her today.
Ah, little college reunion.
But don't forget, dinner
at Ah Ma's tonight.
- Mm-hmm.
- My whole family's gonna be there.
- Yes.
- I can't wait to show you off.
Hubba hubba!
How can I resist?
Ooga ooga!
Put your glasses on,
won't you?
You're all
You're all I need
To get by
You're all
I need
Whoa
To get by
Yeah
New York in the house!
Dig it!
Oh, Peik Lin!
What up, bitch?! Yeah!
Oh, my God,
you look amazing.
I know. Some things
never change, right?
And this is... quite a place.
Astor! Vanderbilt!
Rockefeller!
Naughty, naughty boys,
stop barking!
Hey, Rachel!
Hi!
Singapore's so hot.
Come in, enjoy the air-con.
Come, come on!
The whole family
waiting to meet you.
Very excited.
Rachel!
Welcome, welcome!
Wow! Oh, my gosh!
Your house is amazing,
Mrs. Goh.
You're such a sweet talker.
Call me Auntie.
Auntie Neenah.
Sorry. Auntie Neenah.
We were inspired by
the Hall of Mirrors in Versailles.
And Donald Trump's bathroom.
- Really?
- Yeah.
You like it or not?
Oh, yes!
The gold is very...
brilliant.
Uh, uh, Rachel Chu,
we are so... uh, grateful for
all the help you
have given my, uh...
Peik Lin
back in her uni days.
W-Without you, uh, she
would be a hot mess.
Oh, my God, no.
Actually, if it wasn't for her,
I'd be a big mess.
She was a huge help
to me in college.
Nice to meet you, Mr. Goh.
Nice to meet you, too, Chu.
Coo coo... ca Chu?
You...
poo poo?
I'm just kiddin'.
I don't have an accent.
I'm just messin' with you.
No, no, I-I studied
in the States, too.
Yeah, Cal-State Fullerton.
Yeah, I majored in thought.
Mmm.
Don't stand on ceremony, Rachel.
This is simple food, lah.
Ha, cha-cha-cha.
Don't be shy!
- Oh.
- You're not a model.
- No, definitely not.
- No, you're not.
Not at all. Far from it.
Make sure you eat it all.
'Cause I'm watching you.
- Okay.
- Thank you.
Apa, can we go trampoline?
Uh, you haven't finished
your nuggets yet, sweetie.
Okay, there's a lot of children
starving in America. Right?
I mean, take a look at
her, she's American.
Huh? Really skinny.
You wanna look like that?
No!
Then eat our nuggets!
So, Rachel, what
you do in America?
Um, I'm an economics professor.
Whoa.
Very impressive!
Econ professor, eh?
Wow, you must be very smart.
Good for you!
Let me get this straight.
You both went to
the same school.
Yet someone came back
with a degree that's useful.
And the other one came
back as Asian Ellen.
Psst, P.T.!
Look at her.
She's a hottie.
This is the kind of girl
you should date.
Smart, beautiful.
Not those like, K-pop
skanks with like, no brain,
big eyes,
and small back sides.
She has an amazing
back side.
This is gold standard.
Don't be shy.
Just talk to her.
I love you.
Pa, she's here with her boyfriend.
I don't see
no ring on her finger.
Uh, my boyfriend's
actually from Singapore.
And that's why we're here.
We're here to go to his
best friend's wedding
where he's gonna
be the best man.
Hmm.
What's his name?
This is a very small island.
Maybe we know his family.
His name is Nick Young.
The Nick you're dating
is Nick Young?
His best friend...
You're invited to Colin
Khoo's wedding, eh?
Yeah, you guys know
them, or something?
Hellz yeah!
The Khoos, the Youngs,
I mean, who doesn't
know who they are?
They're just the
biggest developers
in all of Singapore!
And Malaysia, Thailand,
Brunei, New Mexico...
She gets it.
Colin and Araminta's
wedding is like
Singapore's event
of the century.
The Youngs are like royalty.
Did you not know?
Did she not know?
Why you never say before?
Do tell, what are they like?
I don't really know what...
I mean, I haven't met them yet.
I'm gonna meet them tonight.
I'm going to Nick's
grandma's house.
You're going to Nick's
grandma's house wearin' this?
Wearin' that?
Great. Great.
I thought red was
a lucky color, right?
Yeah, if you're an envelope.
Zing!
Nailed it.
Zing!
Rachel, these people
aren't just rich.
Okay? They're crazy rich.
Look.
There's new money
all over Asia.
You got the Beijing billionaires,
the Taiwan tycoons...
but the Young family,
they're old-money rich.
They had money
when they left China
in the 1800s.
And they went
all the way down here.
Not there... here.
They came to Singapore
when there was nothing but
jungle and pig farmers.
And there was a snake
here eating an apple.
You know what I mean?
And they built all of this.
Now, they're the landlords of the
most expensive city in the world.
Here you go.
These people are so
posh and snobby...
they're snoshy.
Here you go.
Yeah, but Nick's not like that.
Even if he isn't,
I guarantee you, the family is.
That's why tonight,
you need to not look like
Sebastian of The Little Mermaid.
You know the little crab guy?
Look at this guy,
he's sleeping!
Come on!
This isn't your grandma's road.
Goddammit.
Thank you for driving me.
Duh, this is like, my one chance
to see the Young family mansion.
In the next intersection,
make a u-turn.
Make a u-turn.
Are uh, are you sure
you gave me the right address?
The GPS says there's, like,
nothing here.
Like, literally nothing.
I mean, I copied and pasted
the exact address.
You copied and you pasted it?
Yeah.
Did you just copy
and paste "jungle"
and just kinda
threw it in there?
No, it's just the same...
You actually used the...
Okay!
All right, that's uh... Hi!
So, we'll just...
Hello, sir, how are you?
We're here for
the party, and... we're...
We come in peace.
Do you know where the
Young family house is?
Nicholas Young?
I'm-I'm Rachel Chu.
I'm here to...
Uh, Rachel Chu for the west.
There's a west.
He's on the phone.
He's on the phone.
Is that a gun knife?
It's a knife gun.
It's a... okay!
And there's a friend.
Hi! Very nice.
We can go though?
We're going through? Okay.
Don't stab the car.
Thank you, bye!
Oh, my God, it's beautiful.
Beautiful? 200 mil
worth of real estate.
Spectacular.
Damn, Rachel.
He's like the Asian Bachelor.
Hi, gorgeous.
Wow.
I think I've just fallen in
love with you all over again.
Mhrm-Hrrhm...
Rachel!
Missed you too.
What you've been up to?
Psst, Rachel!
Oh, uh, this is my friend,
Peik Lin.
- Hey, there.
- Howdy!
Thank you very much
for bringing Rachel.
Oh, no worries.
Do you wanna stop by
for some dinner?
- Oh, no, I couldn't impose.
- No, it's not a problem.
- I had some dinner plans.
- Seriously.
Yeah, I'd fuckin' love to.
Nope.
You have a cocktail dress
in your trunk?
I'm not an animal, Rachel.
I thought this was
just a family thing.
Grandmother's invited some of
her friends over tonight.
The tan huas are blooming.
It's a whole thing.
You ready for this?
Oh, damn, Nick.
This is a party though. Okay.
The good bathrooms
are up the stairs
and you can get
changed in there.
Okay, got it.
I'll find it, thank you.
You know when you said
you grew up in your
grandma's house?
I wasn't expecting this.
Thank you.
Oh, no, no, no!
Those are for your fingers.
Thank you very much.
A little bit much, I know.
This place is gorgeous.
I mean, the rolling green hills.
I mean, there are armed
guards out there.
And a giant tiger.
Okay.
That... is Mr. Harima.
Uh, my great grandfather
actually shot him
when he ran into the house.
Astrid and I used to
find cigarettes in his paws.
Do you want to head in?
Actually, I wanted to bring
you over to my mum first.
Come on.
Mum.
You need a haircut.
So unkempt.
And you look tired
from your trip.
I'm going to ask the cook
to make you some herbal soup.
I'll send it to the hotel later.
Mum, this is Rachel Chu.
Oh, my gosh, I...
I'm so happy
to meet you, Mrs. Young.
Or uh... Auntie... Right?
I'm just learning the thing...
I'm very glad
to finally meet you, too.
And I'm sorry Nick's
father couldn't be here.
He was called to
business in Shanghai.
I told Rachel, when duty calls,
Dad answers.
As it should be.
Nick tells me
you're a professor, too.
What do you teach?
Um, I teach economics.
And she's brilliant.
NYU's youngest faculty member.
So, economics.
Sounds challenging.
Are your parents
academics as well?
Uh, no.
Well, my dad actually
died before I was born.
And my mom didn't even
go to college.
She actually hardly
spoke any English
when she immigrated
to the United States.
But she worked really hard.
And she studied and she
earned her real estate license
while she was waiting tables,
supporting us.
Now, she likes
to say that she's
Flushing's top
real estate broker.
A self-made woman.
She must be
so proud of you.
Well, she knows that I'm
passionate about what I do,
and she's always
wanted that for me.
Pursuing one's passions.
How American.
Well, you mother's
very open-minded.
Not like here,
where parents are obsessed
with shaping the lives
of their children.
That's dinner.
Go ahead.
I'll be out in a minute.
Rachel, it was lovely
meeting you.
Thank you, you too.
Okay, she hates me.
Takes a little minute
to warm up to her.
- You'll get there.
- A whole minute?
- Nicky!
- Astrid.
Rachel!
Good to see you.
I'm so glad you could make it.
- Michael.
- Nick.
It's so good to see
your face, finally.
This is my husband, Michael.
Nice to meet you. I've
heard so much about you.
Nice to meet you, Michael.
Hey, the golden boy's
back! Nick!
And you must be Rachel.
I'm Edison Cheng.
This is my wife.
- Hi.
- Her name is Fiona.
So I see you've already
met Princess Astrid.
And her little soldier
toy-boy, Mikey.
You know Mikey's a big
shot tech startup guy.
So if you uh, forget your
password, he's your man.
So you're from the Taiwan
Plastics Chus, right?
Wanna punch him in the face.
Just once.
Take a number.
I'll be in there for sure.
- Champagne?
- Thank you.
So, have you prepped
Rachel to face the wolves?
Rachel is a New Yorker.
She lectures millennials
for a living.
I think she'll manage
our family.
You've been away too long.
Okay, sorry, time out.
So you're not from
the Taiwan Chu family?
Nope.
Hong Kong Telecom Chus?
No.
Malaysian packing peanut Chus?
Is that really a thing?
Yeah, it's everywhere...
I'm gonna stop you there.
because I'm gonna
take her on the rounds.
- We'll be back.
- No, wait, hang on!
China instant noodle Chus?
Rachel...
Chu are you?
This is Auntie Alix
and Auntie Felicity.
Hi, it's so nice to meet you.
I've never been to a
tan hua party before.
We love any excuse
to throw a soiree.
Do your parents
like to entertain?
Oh, I'm sorry.
Your mother's single.
Yup.
Auntie Jacqueline, one of
my parents' oldest friends.
I actually met Nick's
father at Cambridge.
So, what line of work
is your father in?
Uh, my father died
before I was born.
But he was a factory
worker in China.
Nicki, is this your girlfriend?
You should hurry up
and get married!
Ah Ma,
thank you for inviting me
to your home.
It is very beautiful.
This is Ling Cheh.
My former nanny.
Look, now's the time we
need all hands on deck.
Please, please, just
do me this favor.
Thank you. Buh-bye.
They started clearing
away dinner.
Your favorites.
Thank you.
You know, if you need
bodies at the office,
I could always come in
and help out.
The glamorous Astrid Leong
working as an assistant?
Mm-hmm.
Wait...
Isn't Araminta's
bachelorette party tomorrow?
And this would be the perfect
excuse to get out of it.
Thank you. Really.
But I've got
everything covered.
Okay.
I forgot to get you a fork.
It's okay, you stay.
I'll go get it.
Michael, I think it's the office.
Oh, my God, Nick, I can't
believe I just did that.
It's fine. I don't think
anybody even noticed.
I freaked out, Nick.
Oh, my God.
- I'm so sorry!
- It's fine, don't worry about it.
Can I have a tissue, please?
Here, go, go. Get changed.
I'll keep Rachel company.
Thank you, Ollie.
You're in good hands.
Give me two minutes.
I'll change.
Okay.
Hi, I'm Rachel.
Oh, I know.
- Rachel! Rachel!
- What?
I heard you thought
Ah Ma was the cook.
Ah!
On the bright side,
you're the talk of the party.
People like your dress.
Oh, I did that.
- Oh!
- I know.
- Chic '70s goddess.
- I know!
It's very disco Cleopatra,
but in a good way.
That's exactly what
I was going for.
Oh, well.
Oliver. I like your shoes.
Oh, thank you.
I'm Peik Lin. Yeah.
- Cheers.
- Yeah.
These are lovely.
They're clip-ons.
Are they?
So, Oliver, are you
a cousin, too?
Mm, well, I'm one of
the poorer Asians.
The rainbow sheep
of the family.
But I make myself useful.
Whatever the Youngs want,
I procure.
Golden Koi fish...
Huanghauli furniture...
A rare Cambodian gong.
Why would they want to buy
a rare Cambodian gong?
Because they can.
Ah Ma insists
all your clothes
be washed and pressed
every two weeks.
This... Hm?
Everything is exactly
as I left it.
Looking for your cigars?
I had them thrown out
years ago.
Never could get anything
past you, can I?
I keep telling Ah Ma
to put your things away.
But she says this room makes
her feel like you're still here.
Well, I got an earful
when you didn't
move back last year.
Your father and I
were really looking forward
to having you home.
He's not getting any younger.
With you on board,
maybe he'll take a day off
once in a while.
I know, Mum.
I'm just not ready yet.
There's things in New York
that I want to see through.
Well, I'm happy
I finally met Rachel.
She is very impressive.
I think so, too.
I thought you
might be excited
that the first girl
that I bring home
is a Chinese professor.
Chinese-American.
You know,
bringing her home,
introducing her
at a large family gathering,
some people may say...
When... there's something
to say about Rachel and me,
you'll be first to hear.
Some things...
I need to figure out
on my own.
Is that an American accent
I'm hearing?
How do I look?
Perfect.
Everyone, everyone!
The tan hua plants
very rarely bloom.
And even then, only at night.
Their beauty is spectacular
but fleeting.
By dawn, they'll be gone.
So come, come.
Oh, someone forgot
to wear a bra.
Kitty Pong. Cousin Alistair's
latest flame.
An actress. Rumor is
she was in a porno.
Two girls,
one Cup O' Noodles.
You know, I thought I would
like that more than I did.
- The book was much better.
- Mm-hmm.
Is it just me or are people like,
staring at me?
Eh, they're just jealous.
You nabbed the crown prince.
Nicky is Ah Ma's favorite.
In line to inherit everything.
No surprise there when
that's the competition.
Oh, speaking of
the grande dame...
There you are.
Been looking all over for you.
Are you ready to meet
my grandmother?
Ah Ma...
Nicki, you're home!
Not coming to see your Grandma
for so long.
I'm glad I'm still alive.
Did you eat yet?
You've become too skinny.
That's because
I miss your cooking.
Ah Ma,
this is my good friend,
Rachel Chu.
Ah Ma,
thank you for inviting
me to your home.
Nick always talks about you.
He says no one in the world
makes better dumplings.
It's nothing.
I can show you
how to make them, too.
I would be honored.
You must come back soon then,
when there are not so many
craning necks around.
Look, they're in full bloom!
It's so nice having
Nick back home.
But he seems... different.
When children are away
from home too long,
they forget who they are.
What's up, lot? Yeah!
Oh! Rachel!
So happy you're here.
Oh!
Oh, my God, your Gap look...
brilliant.
Thanks.
She's coming with me.
Ah, hold on. Kiss.
36 hours, back.
- Mintzy, one piece, please?
- Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Not listening at all.
So, I'm gonna introduce
you to my posse.
We're flying to my mum's
resort in Sumatra.
She's closed down
the whole place
just for us.
We're gonna have
so much fun!
Come on, meet the girls.
Girls, this is Rachel.
- Hi.
- Hi, nice to meet you.
You let Bernard Tai
organize all of this?
Yeah.
- Bernard.
- Hey.
This is for you, asshole.
Tina, Kimmy!
The twins are in the house!
It's easy to make
a killer entrance
when you come
as a matching set.
Hi, we haven't met.
I'm Amanda Ling.
Hi, I'm Rachel Chu.
Oh, you're Nick Young's friend.
- Yeah.
- Word gets around fast here.
You're a professor
at NYU, right?
Yes. Um, what about you?
Oh, I'm a lawyer.
General counsel at the Young
family corporation, actually.
That's very impressive.
Nah, just good,
old-fashioned nepotism.
I grew up with Nick and Colin,
we're family friends.
It's nice to meet you,
Rachel Chu.
Ladies, come on!
Let's go start this party!
Ready?
Let's go.
All I wanted was a weekend
away with my boys...
and some beer.
Maybe some rugby.
Don't worry.
It's gonna be great
whatever happens.
Let's make some babies!
No.
I don't think it will be.
Any asshole can plan
a normal stag party.
Hookers, drugs, dog fighting.
That's minor league shit.
To organize a party
this massive...
Takes a massive asshole.
Takes a goddamn mastermind.
Where exactly is this party?
It's right there.
Bloody hell.
Whoo!
Yes!
Oh, my God, Nick.
What are you worried about?
You don't have to
keep Rachel happy.
She's lucky to be here.
Nice, Eddie.
Oh, what?
So, we'll pretend
that's not the truth?
Are we in some kind of fairytale
story that I don't know about?
Did you find a shoe at midnight
and jump in a pumpkin?
Yo, I got so much shit
about marrying Fiona,
and her parents
own the biggest
shipping company
in Hong Kong.
Hey, Araminta's adorable.
But you think your
dad would be
spending millions
on this wedding
if her parents didn't own
a billion dollar resort chain?
What's Rachel
bringing to the table?
Oh, small tits!
Oh!
Hey, hey, hey.
It's not worth it, man.
They're drunk.
Hey, guys! This is boring.
Massage time.
For you, the bachelor!
You're gonna get one
before this weekend is over.
Or we're gonna tie you up
and shave your ku ku jiao!
Ku ku jiao! Ku ku jiao!
Hey, try this.
We have to get off this ship.
Welcome to paradise.
This is Samsara Island.
This weekend
is about sisterhood
and connecting with the divine
in all of us.
So, I hope you'll all
find your bliss...
starting with...
an all-paid shopping spree
at the fashion boutique!
Rachel! Come on!
Bitch, I saw this first!
You have little tits!
What about you?
Little bitch!
No!
One more minute!
Keep on working
and hurry!
One more minute!
Keep on working
and hurry!
Yup. No one loves free stuff
more than rich people.
Just the one dress for you?
I don't want to lose an arm.
Ooh, well, in that case...
One last touch.
Well, isn't Nick a lucky guy?
Time's up. Next stop...
Spa!
You're a genius, Nicky.
What's a best man for?
I guess that pilot's license
came in handy after all.
- There you go, champ.
- Oh, thank you, sir.
Mmm, I think that is the
best beer I've ever had.
I'm gonna have to
agree with you on that.
You know,
if it wasn't for Araminta,
I'd ask you to marry me.
Although,
there is a little something
that might get in the way of that.
Mm.
- No.
- Yeah.
- Is that real?
- Yes.
- What? Yes!
- Yes.
Yes, man, congratulations!
That is frickin' amazing!
- I'm ready.
- You're ready. You're doing it.
Nick, I'm really
happy for you, man.
Thanks, dude.
Mmm.
I think my masseuse
just got me pregnant.
I can see why Nick put off
coming back to Singapore.
What do you mean?
You know...
He was supposed
to come back last year.
Take over the family business.
His parents freaked out
when he didn't.
But now that he's back,
I'm sure all is forgiven.
But he's not back for good,
I mean, we're just here
for a wedding.
Wow.
But?
No, I'm really happy for you.
Colin, I've known you since
you were in nappies.
I know when there's
something on your mind.
Well, it wasn't that long ago
that you were sure you
were moving back home.
And I mean,
Rachel loves her job
in New York.
Yeah, we're gonna
figure that out.
You're going
to figure it out.
Right.
Rachel, I get it.
It's hard knowing
where you stand
with someone like
Nicholas Young.
He has all that
pressure from his family.
Not just in business, but
in who he's dating.
It's like...
you just never know
what's quite going on
in that gorgeous head of his.
Nick told you that
we were together, right?
It's ancient history now.
All of our families,
particularly his mother,
always wanting us
to get married.
I guess we weren't ready then.
Dude, ever since
primary school,
you were always going to be
the next chairman
of the Young Corporation,
your family's shining heir.
You really think your
family's gonna accept
anything less than that?
I mean, unless you...
No.
Are you thinking
of walking out?
Leaving everything to bloody
Alistair and Eddie?
I'm not walking out
on anything.
I met a girl, I fell in love,
and I want to marry her.
It can't just be one thing
or the other.
Uh, no, no, no, no.
It's not that simple.
You know that.
I really admire you.
It takes guts
coming all the way over here
facing Nick's family.
Especially when Eleanor
isn't exactly in your corner.
Okay, your family aside,
you ever thought about what
your relationship
with Rachel will be like
if you got married?
I mean, okay, y-you're
Nicholas Young.
You're untouchable,
you always have been.
But Rachel's not.
And if she becomes
Mrs. Nicholas Young,
every day for her
is going to be a struggle.
I heard she told Tina that
Nick is a good catch.
So typical.
She's not even that pretty.
It's like, she's never heard
of plastic surgery.
Oh, shit.
Sorry.
You sure she's ready for that?
Rachel?
It's okay. Let's just
forget about those girls.
Camp out here
and order room service.
I'll call security.
No.
I'm not gonna make a scene.
I'm not gonna give 'em
the satisfaction.
I mean,
it was supposed to be
mani-pedis,
cocktails, surf
and pineapples.
This definitely
wasn't on the menu.
Why would Araminta
even have friends like that?
It's just mean.
Well, you grow up
your whole lives together,
you make excuses for people.
Especially the morons.
I mean, I don't like
having to deal with
catty, fish-killing sociopaths.
How did you two
get through all this?
Well, I didn't have it
quite this bad, but
it wasn't pretty.
Well, at least tell me
it gets better.
Of course, it does.
You okay?
Yeah.
Actually...
No.
You could talk to me.
Michael is
having an affair.
I'm really sorry, Astrid.
I thought I was here
to meet your family...
go to your
best friend's wedding...
eat some good food.
Instead, I feel like I'm a
villain in a soap opera
who's plotting to steal
your family fortune.
What happened?
I mean, I met Amanda.
She told me that
everyone here thinks
that I'm the evil person that
prevented you from moving
back to Singapore last year
when I didn't even know
you were supposed to come home.
You have every reason
to be upset.
I'm not done yet.
There's also this
gutted, bloody fish
that Araminta's friends
left for me
at my hotel room
on my bed,
next to the words,
"Catch this,
you gold-digging bitch."
Written in big, fat,
serial-killer letters.
Is that all that happened?
I mean, please tell me
that's all that happened.
You know what? I don't even
care about those stupid girls
with their stupid little designer
handbags and sunglasses.
I don't care about that.
I don't care that your ex-girlfriend
told me all this crap.
It's that you didn't tell me
any of it!
I screwed up.
- Why?
- I really messed up.
Were you trying to test me?
Why would you do that?
I made a mistake.
When we first met,
you had no idea who I was.
Who my family were.
You didn't care.
Yeah, I don't care
about that stupid stuff.
Well, exactly.
You are so different
from all of the women
that I grew up with.
And I love
who I am around you.
And I don't want that to change.
- And that's selfish, I know.
- Mm-hmm.
I'm sorry that you had to
deal with that on your own.
But I'm here now.
And whatever happens,
we'll get through it together.
Dead fish and all.
All right?
It was so gross.
But I buried it.
You dealt with it.
Come here.
You know what? We need
to do something tonight.
We need to do something
that's just you and me. Okay?
- A hundred percent agree.
- Yes.
But...
we do have to go
make some dumplings first.
Okay?
Can we eat them?
You can eat
as many as you like.
Okay, fine.
This is too much.
We're hosting
a rehearsal dinner
not feeding an army.
Better too many than have
people say we're stingy.
So, right.
You put the baby in bed...
You tuck, tuck, tuck...
Same on the other side...
and you give him
a kiss goodnight.
That's so cute.
Then you eat the baby.
You eat the baby.
You gotta make sure
he's cooked.
Did your Ah Ma
teach you that?
She did.
I, on the other hand, was
taught by Grand Auntie Mabel.
You put the Botox
in the face...
and then you
pinch, pinch, pinch
then voila.
You guys all learned
when you were kids?
We didn't have a choice.
We taught you so you'd know
the blood, sweat and tears
it took to raise and
feed you monkeys.
Not like most,
microwaving macaroni and
cheese for their own children.
No wonder they
put their parents
in the old folks home
when they are grown up.
I know.
Ah Ma says if we don't pass
traditions down like this,
they'll disappear.
God forbid we lose the
ancient Chinese tradition of
guilting your children.
It's totally worth it.
Mother used to wait for
me after school with a
nice basket of these.
Lucky you.
Hey, I never got
after-school dumplings.
Well, that's because
Auntie Felicity was doing
after-school migrant
immigration.
Smart-ass.
If your grandfather was alive,
he'd kick you into next week.
Hey, this is Dolce!
Do you speak Cantonese?
No, I don't.
It's just great seeing
you guys all like this.
When I was growing up,
it was just me and my mom.
Which I loved.
Uh, but we didn't really have
a big family like this.
It's really nice.
That's so lovely of
you to say, Rachel.
We are all very lucky
to have each other.
That's a beautiful ring,
Auntie Eleanor.
I've never seen
anything like it.
Nick's father had it made
when he proposed to me.
It's very romantic.
How did you guys meet?
She met him at Cambridge.
Both studying law together.
Oh, I didn't know
you were a lawyer.
I wasn't.
I withdrew from university
when we got married.
I chose to help my
husband run a business,
and to raise a family.
For me, it was a privilege.
But for you, you may think
it's old-fashioned.
It's nice you
appreciate this house,
and us being here together
wrapping dumplings.
But all this
doesn't just happen.
It's because we know
to put family first
instead of chasing
one's passion.
Ah, everyone's here!
Ah Ma.
Ah Ma.
Thank you.
Oh, Nick.
Come and sit.
Oh, Nicki.
You brought Rachel. Good.
I can see you
more clearly in the day.
The shape or your nose
is auspicious.
Let me have a look,
come closer.
Very nice looking.
Sit, sit.
You made those dumplings?
They don't look very good.
You lost your touch.
Oh, hi.
I think I'm a little lost.
This house is pretty big.
I'm glad I found you.
I'm afraid that I've been unfair.
Oh, no. You know what?
I'm sorry I made an assumption.
I didn't mean to offend you.
Not at all.
You asked about my ring.
The truth is, Nick's
father had it made
when he wanted
to propose to me
because Ah Ma wouldn't
give him the family ring.
I wasn't her first choice.
Honestly, I wasn't her second.
Gosh, I'm so sorry.
I had no idea.
I didn't come
from the right family.
Have the right connections.
And Ah Ma thought
I would not make
an adequate wife to her son.
But she came around,
obviously.
It took many years.
And she had good reason
to be concerned.
Because I had no idea
of the work
and the sacrifice it would take.
There were many days
when I wondered
if I would ever measure up.
But having been
through it all,
I know this much:
You will never be enough.
We should head back.
I wouldn't want Nick to worry.
You all right?
Yeah.
I know my mum
can be tough at times, but
there isn't anything
she wouldn't do for me.
And there is a reason why
I lived with Ah Ma growing up.
It's because my mother knew
she wasn't the favorite.
So she let her raise me
so I would be.
You were just a kid?
Yeah.
Well...
It's hard to understand
from the outside.
But she did what she thought
was best for the family.
For everyone involved.
Anyway...
I think I've had
enough with dumplings
for the rest of my life.
What should we do?
Sushi? Movies?
Anything you like, really.
Wait, what? Was she like...
"You will never be good
enough for my son."
Or was it like, "You...
"You... will never be good
enough for my son."
- It's like the second one.
- Oh.
Except for in a way that
made me wanna like,
cry and puke
at the same time.
God, she's a badass.
You know, I bet if you told her
you'd leave Nick
for like, a million dollars,
she would write that check.
They do that around here.
She looked at me like
I was nothing.
Like a 10 million dollar check,
I feel like she would do that.
I don't even know
what I should do.
I mean, I can't even tell Nick
because he like, worships her.
Yeah. Chinese sons think their
moms fart Chanel No. 5.
What about the Ah Ma?
She hate your face, too?
Okay, nobody said
they hated my face.
And Ah Ma, she liked my face.
She said I had a lucky nose.
That's great!
You know, Eleanor can
hate you all day long,
but she can't be 2,000 years
of Chinese filial piety.
I feel like I shouldn't even
go to the wedding.
You know, it's Colin
and Araminta's day.
I don't wanna cause
any drama there.
I feel like I should just...
sit it out.
You know? Tell Nick I had
food poisoning, or something.
What?
That's bullshit.
- You're just scared.
- No, I'm not.
Okay, here's what you need
to understand, all right?
It's not about getting
Eleanor to like you.
It's about getting her to
respect you.
All right? Right now, she
just thinks you're some like,
undeserving, clueless,
gold-digging,
Yeah, I got it.
trashy, unrefined banana.
Yellow on the outside,
and white on the inside.
I know what a banana is.
When in reality, you're like a
super sophisticated, smart
professor of freaking
game theory.
Show her that side of you,
you know?
- You're right.
- Damn straight, I'm right.
It's Peik Lin. I'm always right.
Yeah, she's like trying to play
a game of chicken with me.
Where she's like,
coming at me and like,
thinking I'm gonna
swerve like a chicken.
But you can't swerve!
I'm not gonna swerve,
not for her.
No, chickens are bitches, dude.
And I'm not a chicken.
You're not a chicken.
You gon' roll up to that wedding
you gon' be like,
bok-bok, bitch.
Bok-bok, bitch.
Chickens are bitches!
Sorry, Uncle.
What are you doing tonight?
Ah, I was gonna go to
FedEx or somethin'.
Why?
Oh!
I have been waiting to do
this properly for so long!
I'm thinkin' eyebrow triage,
root crimps, maybe
some eyelid tape.
What do you think?
Ugh, all of it.
And I would throw in
a Korean snail face mask.
Sweetie, your skin is so dry,
it's hurting my face.
Thank you.
You know, it's about time
someone stood up
to Auntie Eleanor.
Well, you, not me. Oh, God.
She can't know
I was over here.
- Oh, no.
- Right. Well.
Okay, let's get to work.
Cappuccinos.
Pull the plum Balenciaga,
the peach Cleary,
the Jean Baptiste,
all the Bottegas.
And a case of bubbly
to keep us tucked and ruffled.
And a sandwich for Peik Lin.
Oh, okay. All right.
I'm not sure if it's working
or if she looks like
a clown's tampon.
On a heavy day.
You look like a flower.
Like a sad, lonely flower
no one wants to be around.
Ah!
I mean, it's the
wedding of the century
so, of course, we're here.
- Hmm.
- Ow.
It's not that... bad...
It's holding you up.
A hands-on dress,
you know what I mean?
Incoming.
Taipei Tiger 2 is going
to redefine the genre.
She's a star.
She's a star.
Oh!
I'm blinded by the light.
This is why disco died.
You kinda look like a slutty
Ebola virus.
Like a bag of Skittles.
"Taste the rainbow."
I just think if you could just,
maybe just
tell her this is coming from you.
She probably doesn't
wanna hear it from a guy.
Okay.
Okay, remember,
optimal angles.
Everyone about,
Rachel Chu of New York!
Rachel Chu of New York!
Rachel! Rachel, please!
Okay, ladies, looking good.
Looking good.
Out of the way, please.
Out of the way.
- You look gorgeous!
- Thank you.
Over there.
Ladies.
- Amanda.
- Hmm.
You're in my way.
Our Chinese investors
are getting nervous.
I have to fly into
Shenzhen on Monday
to try and talk them down.
It's Cassian's birthday.
Yeah, I know.
I hate to miss it.
But this is important.
Don't you think your son's
birthday's important?
Let someone else handle it.
Unless...
there's another reason
you're out of town.
What are you saying?
I know you're having an affair.
Jesus, Astrid.
Let's just...
get through the wedding
and we'll deal with it after.
I don't want to make a scene.
You find out I'm having an
affair with another woman
and you're worried
about making a scene?
You'd rather
I scream and carry on?
Yes.
Honestly, I wish you would.
It would show
you care about more
than what people thought
of you and your family.
Don't try and turn this on me.
I'm not the one
who screwed up.
Of course not.
You're always the prettiest,
richest, most perfect
girl in the room
while I'm just this lucky bastard
who'll never measure up.
Don't say that!
I know what you're
thinking, Astrid.
That's why
you hide your shoes,
the jewelry you buy.
As if every minute of my life
I'm not reminded of it.
I'm just tired.
I'm tired of having
nothing I do matter.
Including having that affair.
Of course
what you do matters.
God, how can you say that?
Hmm.
Is this a church
or a paddy field?
They spent $40 million
on the wedding.
Really? That's too much.
We're Methodist.
$20 million is our limit.
I know.
Princess Intan.
Vicious woman.
I heard she demanded
a whole row to herself
so she wouldn't be
bothered by anyone.
Really?
Who is that?
Aunties.
Rachel.
How lovely to see you.
The pleasure's all mine.
I'm sorry.
Our row is full.
I love it.
Bok-bok.
Okay.
Princess Intan.
Rachel Chu.
I read your great article
about micro loans
in the Asian Economics Journal.
I received so much criticism
about that article.
Well, you know what?
I think your critics
missed the point.
'Cause your micro loans
help women.
And women lift up economies.
What is your name again?
Rachel Chu.
It's a pleasure to meet you.
Now what brings you here?
I followed a boy...
Ah Ma is here.
She never comes
to these things.
Thank you, Grandma.
Family never says thank you.
How you feeling?
- Good.
- Don't be nervous.
- I'm not nervous.
- You look great.
Thank you.
Hey, man, Rachel's
not sitting with your family.
Yeah. I don't blame her.
Mother hasn't exactly
been the most welcoming.
But I'm sure she'll be out
back somewhere, laying low.
Mm, she's right at the front.
Take a look.
I think you've got a fighter.
Guys, it's time.
Hey, make sure she
doesn't take your balls.
Oh!
Just joking!
Thanks for dressing up.
Hey, it's not about me.
Come on. Thanks, Bernard.
It's not about me.
Wise men say
Only fools rush in
But I can't help
Falling in love
With you
Shall I stay?
Would it be a sin?
For I can't help
Falling in love
With you
Like a river flows
Surely to a sea
Darling, so it goes
Some things
Are meant to be
So take my hand
Take my whole life, too
For I can't help
Falling in love
With you
For I
Can't help
Falling in love
With
You
You look spectacular,
you know that?
It's the double Spanx.
I can't breathe.
It's not the clothes.
It's you.
Uh, excuse me.
Suppose using you
to dance us out, come on!
- Come on, Nicky-Nick.
- All right.
- Oliver.
- Hmm. Yes, Auntie.
Be a dear
and take care of that.
As you wish.
You know, you should
wear a tux more often.
Like all the time?
Yeah.
You know, when you're
playing basketball at the Y.
Shaving.
Brushing your teeth.
Alistair, your father's
looking for you.
Something about an overdrawn
discretionary account.
Oh, my God.
Baby!
Oh, hi.
- So?
- Hmm?
How do you like the wedding?
Oh, my gosh, it's so glamorous!
When it's Alistair's and my wedding,
I want it just like this.
No, no. I want it big!
Bigger! Better!
Sweetie.
You'd be lucky if Alistair's
parents give you a tea ceremony.
You know Alistair's
only the fourth son
of a penny-pinching
family, don't you?
He'll get next to nothing.
You want a wedding like this,
you should fall in love
with an only child.
Someone like...
Bernard Tai.
Master Nicholas.
Your grandmother would like to
speak to you and Miss Rachel.
Okay.
- Sick party.
- Yeah.
Hold that.
Ah Ma, Mum.
What's all this about?
Rachel.
I've only know you a short time,
but it's clear
you're a very smart woman.
But, I will not permit you to ruin
my grandson with your ambition.
Ah Ma!
I'm sorry to tell you, but
Rachel has been lying to us
about her family
and her mother.
What-What are you
talking about?
I hired a private investigator
- Mom, you didn't.
- to look into her past.
She said her father
passed away
- in China.
- Mum!
But that's not true.
Your mother's husband
is very much alive.
During her marriage,
she cheated on him
and became pregnant with
another man's child.
And before he found out,
she ran away to America.
- It's all in here.
- You had no right!
- We had every right.
- You did not!
- You're lying.
- Do you have any idea
the scandal this
would have caused?
For Rachel to hide
something like this?
She wouldn't have.
We cannot be linked
to this sort of family.
I don't want
any part of your family.
Rachel!
Don't chase after her and
degrade yourself.
I forbid it.
If you go with her,
- you can't come back!
- Let me go.
- Rachel!
- Nick!
This is your fault.
You let this happen
by allowing him
to stay away so long.
Now, look!
Hey, Cinderella, what's wrong?
You gotta return the
dress before midnight?
Oliver...
Rachel, have you seen Rachel?
Rachel?
Come and eat breakfast.
You need to eat.
Or...
use the bathroom or...
maybe a shower.
It's there if you need it.
Rachel, this is your dinner.
I'll stop by again tonight.
Rachel, please, just
give me a call.
Anytime.
Please.
Rachel, someone's
here to see ya.
I don't want to see him.
It's not Nick.
Mom!
Drink more.
Dong quai and the ginseng
will give you more energy.
Thanks.
Your spirit has always
been so strong.
Ever since young.
You will get through this.
Why didn't you tell me
about my father?
My husband
wasn't a good man.
He hurt me.
But an old schoolmate of mine
helped me through things.
And we fell in love.
And I got pregnant
with his baby.
That's you.
I was so afraid my
husband would find out
and kill us both, so
I just took you and I ran
to America.
Did you ever
I don't know, think about
trying to talk to him?
I mean, do you think about him?
Every day.
When we first came to America,
all I can think about was
reaching out for him, but...
I was so afraid my
husband would find us.
And now, I...
I just don't want to
cause any trouble.
Then I'm really sorry.
Oh, don't be sorry.
You listen to me.
Everything that happened
in my past life,
is the reason why I got you.
My brave and clever girl.
I really thought he was the one.
Now I just wanna go home.
You know...
Nick was the one who called
me and brought me out here.
Before we go,
I think you should
go and talk to him.
I'll email the photo later.
P.T., how long you've
been standing there?
Just a short while.
I'm so sorry about
everything.
What my mother did to you
is unforgivable.
- It's not your fault.
- It is.
Ever since I can remember,
my family has been my whole life.
And I am done
making excuses for them.
Nick.
Marry me.
Marry me and we'll start a new
life together in New York.
Just you and me.
I'll leave all of this behind.
Thanks for meeting me here.
Don't worry about them.
They're half-deaf and
they only speak Hokkien.
Mmm.
My mom taught me
how to play.
She told me mahjong
would teach me
important life skills.
Negotiation, strategy,
cooperation.
You asked me here...
I assume it's not for
a mahjong lesson.
Pong.
My mother taught me, too.
I know Nick told you
the truth about my mom.
But you didn't like me
the second I got here.
Why is that?
There is a Hokkien phrase,
"Gar gee nang".
It means, our own
kind of people.
And you're not our own kind.
Because I'm not rich?
'Cause I didn't go to a
British boarding school,
or I wasn't born into
a wealthy family?
You're a foreigner.
American.
And all Americans think about
is their own happiness.
Don't you want
Nick to be happy?
It's an illusion.
We understand how to build
things that last.
Something you know
nothing about.
You don't know me.
I know you're
not what Nick needs.
Well, he proposed
to me yesterday.
He said he'd walk
away from his family
and from you for good.
Don't worry,
I turned him down.
Only a fool folds
a winning hand.
There's no winning.
You made sure of that.
Because if Nick chose me,
he would lose his family.
And if he chose his family,
he might spend the rest
of his life resenting you.
So you chose for him.
I'm not leaving
'cause I'm scared.
Or because I think
I'm not enough.
Because maybe for
the first time in my life...
I know I am.
I just love Nick so much.
I don't want him
to lose his mom again.
So, I just wanted you
to know that one day,
when he marries another lucky
girl who is enough for you...
and you're playing
with your grandkids
while the tan huas are blooming
and the birds are chirping...
that it was because of me...
a poor,
raised-by-a-single-mother,
low-class,
immigrant
nobody.
Hey.
I'm gonna send someone
for the rest of my stuff.
But I wanna talk to you about my
visitation rights with Cassian.
Stop talking.
What?
Don't worry about
packing your things.
You bought this apartment,
you keep it.
We're leaving.
What do you mean
you're leaving?
Where you gonna go?
I have 14 apartment
buildings that I own,
so, probably one of those.
And you'll see Cassian
when it's good for him
not when it's good for you.
Hey, look.
You know it's not just my fault
that things didn't work out.
You're right.
I shouldn't have
kept things from you.
Hidden my shoes.
Turned down jobs,
charity work.
Worrying that it might
make you feel lesser than.
But let's be clear.
The problem with our marriage
isn't my family's money.
It's that you're a coward.
You gave up on us.
But I just realized
it's not my job
to make you feel like a man.
I can't make you
something you're not.
Good for you!
Walkin' away from
Nick and his family's
badass property portfolio.
You have no one. No network.
But you have integrity.
That's why I respect you.
Thank you for everything.
- Bye, Mrs. Chu.
- Goodbye. And thank you.
You sure I can't
get you to stay?
You know my brother P.T.'s
still single.
All right.
Rachel!
Rachel!
Stay there!
I'm gonna go look for
some extra blankets.
Hello?
Sorry, just one second.
Nick, what are you doing here?
I'm flying back to
New York with you.
Don't make this harder
than it already is.
I always imagined what me
proposing to you would be like.
You know what?
I had it all planned out.
Right behind you.
Don't mind me.
I bring you to my
favorite spot on the island.
There's a hidden trail
that I used to go to as a child.
And there's a cove there that
opens up to this beautiful
lake.
Sorry, dude.
Give me a second,
coming through.
When the sun hits the horizon,
I get down on one knee.
And the rest of the world
would fall away.
Because it would just be you
and...
Because it's just you...
Sorry, I can help you with that.
Right, stay there.
Yeah. You too?
Watch your fingers.
Everybody okay?
'Cause I just need
30 seconds with this woman.
Thank you.
Coming through. Sorry.
I know this is a far throw
from a hidden paradise.
But wherever you are
in the world,
that's where I belong.
But I...
Rachel Chu...
Will you marry me?
And make me the happiest
man in this world?
Yes! Yes!
She will marry you!
Yes!
- I love you.
- I love you, too.
This is gonna be some
flight back to New York.
Well, I was actually thinking
about staying one more night.
Yo, I'd vote for a good time
I've got that feeling
The feeling too easy
As long as I'm breathin'
I've gotta vote for a good time
Tag your name across the sky
Breathe it in and we can fly
Love for love and love for life
Yeah, so let's vote
Like you just got paid
Spend it all on Mary Jane
It's a celebration
Yeah, so I vote
Oh, and everything's changing
It's got me feeling strange but
We can stand together
Yeah, so just vote
Summer nights
that we were wild
Make the choice
that makes you proud
Make the choice
that makes you proud
Yeah, and vote for a good time
Good time, good time
Yeah, yeah
Oh, I vote
Good time, all right
Good time, good time
La la la, La la la, La la la
O-o-oh
Vote for a good time
Oh-oh-oh, Oh
Yeah, yeah, yeah
Good time, good time
La la la, La la la, La la la
O-o-oh, Oh
Oh, a good time
Good time, good time
Yeah
Oh, I vote
Good time, all right
Good time, good time
La la la, La la la, La la la
Yeah, all right
Vote for a good time
Oh
Vote for a good time
Good time, good time
Oh-oh-oh
Good time, yeah
Yeah, yeah, huh
Good time, good time
La la la, La la la, La la la
O-o-oh, all right
Vote for a good time
So much beauty into nothin'
Sometimes life is ugly
We're all searchin' for somethin'
So let's vote
Late night, don't wait
Make the choice
that sets you free now
Emancipate your mind
You'll be fine
if you just vote
Tag your name across the sky
Breathe it in and we can fly
Love for love and love for life
Good time
For the moments we remember
And the people that we treasure
We can keep it all together, oh
Vote for a good time
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