Filthy Animals (2024) Movie Script
1
[]
[dog barking]
[Christmas music]
[camera beeps]
Hello.
My name is Jeff,
but please call me Uncle Jeffy.
That's Uncle Mikey.
We're gonna keep you safe.
We're gonna take
good care of you.
You understand?
Uncle Mikey has some
medicine for you.
-Mikey, give him
the fucking medicine.
-[camera beeps]
We put it in some yummy juice,
something in there
to help you rest.
And I got you
some cookies, too.
I got you some cookies.
And then there's
some stuff in here
that's gonna keep you
nice and strong, okay?
[munching] Mmm.
Mmm.
[scraping]
[birds chirping]
[waves crashing]
["Aim For The Heart"
by Federale]
There's a house in the town
At the end of this road
It's a den of fools,
A real mean abode
I'm gonna open the
Door and walk inside
I've got some scores I need
To settle as a point of pride
I've got some
Real bad problems
That I need you to solve
So leave your heart alone
[]
Well there's a wicked man
In a crooked house
He's won a trip down a river
And a widowed spouse
I'm gonna open the door
And walk inside
I've got some scores I need
To settle as a point of pride
I'm getting hungry
For a mean bone
He better aim
For the heart...
[grunts]
[]
[sniffing]
Yeah. You like that, huh?
[muttering]
I'm a karate man,
motherfucker!
[printer humming]
[paper rustling]
Don't work so hard, Bronson.
[man] You almost
done in there?
Yeah, buddy, roll it.
[sniffs]
[soft music]
[birds chirping]
[woman] Bella!
-[phone ringing]
-Mm...
Can you get that, please?
Oh, yeah, never mind,
I'll get it.
Just finish prepping the shop.
We have a new bride
arriving any minute!
[chuckles]
Burgundy Flowers and Gifts.
This is Rosanna speaking.
How may I help you?
Yes, we're open today
from nine AM to four PM.
And we're closed
tomorrow for Christmas.
Mm-hmm.
Yes. Okay.
Bye-bye.
[man]
Bronson, come here, boy.
[door closes]
[water pouring]
["Aim For the Heart"
by Federale]
[blender whirring]
-What's up?
-Where's it at?
Right here.
What is this wonky thing?
It's gonna hit.
Try it.
[lighter flicks]
-See?
-[exhales]
It's not bad.
It's not bad, bad.
Next one, I'll roll.
Oh, okay, yeah, 'cause
you're such the expert.
Why don't you just
roll 'em from now on?
You know, since you're back.
Yeah, sure.
[inhales]
Is it hunting time?
Yeah.
We gotta stop by the flower
shop for this next one.
-Flowers?
-Yeah.
[chuckles]
This next one loves flowers.
[car alarm chirps]
[thuds]
[woman] Nonstop.
All this planning,
it's just been, like,
I don't know.
I gotta go, bye.
Emily, our lovely bride-to-be.
-Oh, you must be Rosanna.
-Yes.
Bella!
You sit right here and relax.
[Emily] I know you.
[gasps] High school, right?
Isabella Caper.
Oh, you know Bella?
You know, I almost
didn't recognize you.
-[chuckles] Bella.
-[chuckles]
Can you believe
it's been almost ten years
since graduation?
[Bella chuckles]
[Emily] How have you been?
Oh, I've been
really good, yeah.
[Emily] Oh, you know
Brad Evans, right?
[seagulls calling]
Well, I'm gonna be
Mrs. Brad Evans.
[Rosanna] I'm gonna
let you two catch up.
I'll bring the samples.
[Emily] Oh, thanks.
Do you have social media?
Give me your phone,
I'll add you.
Uh. You know what,
um, actually my phone's
about to die.
I'll just tell it to you.
Eww, I would die
if my phone died.
[scoffs] Okay, what is it?
BellaBeYou92.
[Emily] Love it.
[Bella] Those are my paintings.
My artwork is sold
through private dealers.
Mm. Okay.
Yeah, I don't really
need this job, you know?
I just like working with flowers
and being one with nature.
Well, I'm glad
everything worked out.
Yeah. Everything is just
great with me.
[Rosanna] Here are the samples!
[Emily] Oh, I could actually
use another for tonight,
my friend's Christmas party.
[Rosanna] Of course, we'll make
something special for her.
Just come back by four
because we close early today.
Totally fine.
Wonderful.
Why don't you get started
on Emily's arrangement?
Sure.
Thanks, Bella.
[chuckles]
-[Bella chuckles]
-[door thuds]
[dogs barking]
-[groans]
-[car door closes]
-Door's locked.
-Yeah.
Gosh, do you mind giving me
some room next time?
You're just
getting too damn big.
You ever thought of that?
-[car revs]
-I like to eat.
Oh, I've noticed.
[slow music on radio]
[upbeat music on radio]
[slow music on radio]
[upbeat music on radio]
[slow music on radio]
["Backstage" by
Strawberry Fuzz]
-All right.
-[turns up volume]
As I walk through
The back door of some club
That I've never been
You came up to me
I came up to you
You had those
Red painted lips
Settle down, there's
a fucking cop behind us.
If they were only
gonna do their goddamn job,
we wouldn't have to do
this shit at all, would we?
[music continues]
All right, I'll just need
a couple hours
with Baba and we'll be good.
Cool, man,
yeah, yeah, yeah.
Wait-- what are you
guys gonna be doing?
Uh-- we're gonna
be watching a movie tonight.
-What kind?
-Just another Western.
Oh, I fucking
love Westerns, man.
Those like classic duels.
Three, two, one, drop.
God, I love that shit.
[Emily] This should cover what
we talked about on the phone.
And there's also like a little
Christmas sprinkle
in there for you.
Oh, thank you.
Oh, this is more than enough.
[Emily] Oh, I have
to go in a minute.
I have an appointment
with the doctor.
[Rosanna] Sure you can drive?
Maybe we should
call you an Uber.
No, I'm totally fine.
Okay, well,
let me get you some water.
Oh, okay.
[clears throat]
Hey guys, Emily here.
I'm here at the best
flower shop ever.
Ten percent discount
for new customers!
Ha-- making arrangements
for the best wedding ever!
#EVANSWEDDING
#EMILYBEYOU
#UNICORNLIFE
I will be back at four...
for my order. [chuckles]
Okay, see you at four.
-[Emily] Oh, love you.
-Oh. [chuckles]
Mmm. Bye.
[Rosanna] Bye.
Bella, can you put this
in the register?
Make sure you finish
that arrangement by four.
I need to do a little
last-minute Christmas shopping.
-Okay.
-Remember,
not to take a lunch break today
because we're closing early.
We need to get in as much
business as possible today.
[Bella sighs]
All set?
Okay.
[Rosanna]
Thank you, Bella. Bye.
-[door closes]
-[sighs]
[]
-[door chime ringing]
-What'd you forget--
Hello, how are you today?
-Fine.
-[tapping on window]
Can I help you with something?
I hope so, yeah.
Hey, he's gonna
break the glass.
[tapping on glass]
Something tells
me you wouldn't mind
a little glass breaking
around here, huh?
Freddy!
Get off the glass, man.
Sorry about that.
Where were we?
You needed something?
Yeah, I want your
biggest and your best.
Money is no object.
What do you got?
You can have
that one for $250.
Actually, do you got
something for like 100 bucks?
I don't wanna spend
that much on a chomo.
Sure. Is this for
like Christmas or--
More of like a...
special occasion, you know?
Okay, just
give me a minute.
Okay.
Delivery for Lester Irwin.
[chuckles]
[doll whirring]
[door chime rings]
[approaching footsteps]
-Hello.
-Hi.
[Rosanna] Bella, have you been
helping this young man?
Yeah, I literally
just made this for him.
[Rosanna]
Oh, I forgot my glasses.
I'll just let you finish up.
Thank you.
Man, she's a real pain, huh?
Why don't you just
get rid of her?
If you're not up to the task,
I could, uh--
I could help you.
We could bury her alive
and then plant flowers
on top of her grave.
-[chuckles]
-[forced chuckles]
So, who's
this Christmas gift for?
It's actually for a funeral.
-Oh, my condolences.
-Thank you.
-Would you like
a complimentary ribbon?
-She's hooking me up.
-Oh, was it a person
or an animal?
-Both.
-Oh.
But I don't wanna talk
about it, if that's okay.
Well, I found my glasses,
so I'll see you a little later.
[chuckles] Happy holidays,
young man.
And to you.
[door chime rings]
Isn't she sweet?
-[door closes]
-I would totally kill her.
Just... [gags]
I wish I didn't have to go,
but you know,
what are you gonna do?
Thank you so much again
for this, Miss, uh...
Bella.
Oh.
That's for you.
Thank you.
Happy holidays.
-Merry Christmas.
-[door chime rings]
["Norma, Act I: Casta Diva"
playing]
[singing in Italian]
[sizzling]
[song continues]
[knocking]
[doorbell ringing]
[man] Delivery!
[knocking]
[doorbell ringing]
[music turns off]
[soft clatter]
[knocking]
Delivery for Lester Irwin?
Hi, sir.
I can see you.
Do you want your flowers?
[Lester]
I didn't order flowers.
You have the wrong address.
No, it says here
I have the right address.
Who are they from?
I'm sorry, sir, I can't
give you that information.
You know, it's--
it's probably from St. Nick.
Early Christmas present and all.
Just leave them by the door.
You know, I would,
but my boss needs you
to sign this form indicating
that you received the flowers
or else I'm gonna
get in trouble.
And he'll chew me out,
yada, yada. You know?
But, um-- if you--
if you can't sign,
I'm gonna have to
just take them back.
Okay. I'll be on my way.
Merry Christmas to you.
[Lester] Okay. I'll sign.
Wonderful.
-[door opens]
-Hi, sir.
If you can just sign for me
right at the bottom right there.
Great. Here you go.
And Merry Christmas to you.
[Lester sniffs]
[door creaks]
[knocking]
So sorry to bother
you again, sir.
Can I use your bathroom?
I really need to go.
And I have a long way back.
I'd rather you not.
Please?
I mean, it's--
it's Christmas Eve.
I brought you flowers
and you won't let me
use your toilet?
Now is not a good time.
I really gotta go.
-Oh, okay.
-[unzips]
No! Please stop!
Make it quick.
Oh, thank you so much, sir.
I really appreciate that.
[Lester] The bathroom is on
your left out by the fridge.
Oh. Okay.
[Lester sniffs]
Just a quick piss.
And I'll get out of your hair.
[Lester sniffs]
Hey. You have my phone?
No, amigo.
Haven't seen it.
What company
you work for?
Burgundy Flowers.
What's your name?
[kettle whistling]
[groans]
That was perfect. Thank you.
Oh, are you making us tea?
[Lester]
I don't have time for this.
Listen,
I need you to leave now.
Well, that's just rude, Lester.
I just wanted
a cup of tea, mate.
That's it. Just a little.
-Yeah?
-I know you must have my phone.
Do you have Lapsang?
[Lester] What?
That's like
my favorite tea, you know?
You know, I get it.
I'd be upset too if some
random guy came into my house,
took a shit in my toilet,
and I didn't even know his name.
[sighs] Forgive me.
Allow me to introduce
myself, shall we?
I'm Lars Dubois.
I will not shake your hand.
I'm really very sick
and not feeling well at all.
Oh. Okay.
[Lester] Excuse me,
what are you doing now?
You need to get out
of my house.
I have guests coming
over any minute.
You have guests coming?
On, what, Christmas Eve?
Where's your tree then?
-You a Jew?
-Please go.
I'm not going anywhere.
You have to go.
Or I'll call the--
You'll call the what?
The police?
-I'll do it.
-With what? This phone?
-I'll call!
-Yeah?
Sit your fucking ass down!
[phone beeping]
[Lester] I'm sorry. I--
I didn't mean to charge you.
Can you please
put my phone down and go?
What is this?
It's your burner phone?
Where's your real phone?
That is my real phone.
-And where's your computer?
-I don't have Internet.
I don't want it.
[laughs]
Lester, Lester, Lester.
The roads we take
and the choices we make, huh?
I don't know
what this is about.
I don't have much money,
but I can give you
whatever is in my wallet.
I don't want
your fucking money.
I don't want your money.
-[knocking at door]
-But he might.
[Freddy] Dude, door's locked.
What the fuck?
I'm sorry, I got preoccupied.
I hope you don't mind.
I brought a friend.
I didn't interrupt, did I?
[Lars] Here.
Wow, what a beautiful
place you have, Lester.
What do you want from me?
Oh, we'll get to that.
You mind if
I give myself a little tour?
I do!
-I do mind!
-You stand up again,
I will break your fucking jaw!
We all know you don't pick on
people your own
size now, don't we?
[drawer closes]
Fuck.
[sighs]
-[glass shatters]
-[Lars] Fuck.
[Lester] You animal!
That was priceless.
Oops.
Ah, fuck!
That was a pretty penny, man.
-It slipped.
-Yeah, you're getting sloppy.
You can still
get a lot of money
for the other, right?
-Just take it and--
-Sit down!
[table grating on floor]
[groans]
We're gonna play
a little game, Lester.
I don't wanna
play any games with you.
The rules are pretty simple.
My man Freddy over here is gonna
look through all of your shit,
and if we find
something... questionable,
I'm gonna hurt you.
But if we don't, we'll just go.
No problem.
But we're gonna find
something, aren't we?
'Cause today, I am your judge,
I'm your jury,
and I'm your executioner.
Seems like this game
is already rigged against me.
You won't find what
you're looking for.
Only God can judge me.
Ha! You hear that?
Did Jesus save you, Lester?
I accepted the Lord
when I was in prison.
Fifteen years I spent in there
for the mistakes I made.
I've been out for nine years.
It's been a long time
since I hurt anyone,
even with the life I led
and the horrible
things I've done.
God has forgiven me.
[snorts, laughs]
Who are you to judge?
I dealt with punks
like you in prison.
I think they dealt
with you, huh, Lester?
Have you been naughty?
Or have you been nice?
Is Freddy Cakes
gonna find something
that's gonna make
me fucking hurt you?
Look! "Not Today."
"Not Ever Again."
I made mistakes.
But I'm not a monster.
[clapping]
-Heavy.
-[Freddy sniffs]
Very, very heavy.
[Freddy] Bacon.
-What?
-I smell bacon.
[sniffs]
Bacon, but no fucking eggs?
If you're gonna
kill me, just do it.
I can barely live
with myself anyway.
Slow down.
What do you want from me?
You ever see
those stupid rich kids
point at a globe and wherever
their finger lands,
that's where they go?
That's what me and Freddy
do on that website
that you're all so famous on.
Minus the rich kid part.
[sighs] I made mistakes,
but I'm not a monster.
I live my life every day
avoiding temptation.
I keep myself like
a prisoner here.
Even on Halloween,
my lights are out.
Do I look like
I celebrate holidays?
It's not all my fault.
I was abused myself as a child.
We were all abused
in some way, Lester.
We don't all fuck kids.
Please believe me,
I have changed.
I do all I can to be good.
I go to church.
I pray.
Were you abused as a kid?
Is that why you're doing this?
Maybe.
Maybe.
Why the fuck would
you ask me that?
[crying]
You have no idea
what people like you
have done to people like me.
[crying]
Or...
I'm a vigilante!
A hero!
I seek justice on those
who hurt innocent children.
Whatever one sounded
more convincing,
you pick that one.
[Freddy munching]
No, thank you.
-[thuds]
-[doorbell rings]
-Help! Don't--
-[punch thuds]
Whoo!
[music playing on headphones]
What is Christmas?
Christmas is for caring
What is Christmas?
Bulk up.
Meat.
Mmm. I like meat.
Gains, brah.
Be like Brad.
-[sighs]
-[door chime rings]
-Hi.
-Well, hello.
I need a gift for my wife.
Do you know
her favorite flower?
Oh, one of those, uh--
you know, one of those white
ones that smells good?
-Actually, the--
-White lilies.
Yep, I'm sure
it's white lilies.
Great. Will you be paying
cash or card?
I'll pay with a card.
That's fine, but we
just prefer cash if possible.
I'm just gonna
grab you a ribbon.
It's on the house.
[camera shutter clicking]
So, do you live around
here, Mr. Whitley?
Yes, uh, we are local.
Oh, that's nice.
Would you say you're more
South Torrance or Palos Verdes?
We have a lovely home
on the hill.
Okay, I think I know
that area.
Um, 90275, right?
You have some family
or friends up there?
[scoffs] How do you know
I don't live up there?
Because I do. [laughs]
-I-- I didn't mean--
-I know, I know.
Don't even worry about it.
Merry Christmas.
["La Fiamma Del Tuo Amore"
playing]
[singing in Spanish]
[lighter flicks]
[phone beeping]
Nothing.
[spits]
[bottle clinks]
[groans]
Nothing.
I'm not feeling this, man.
Dude, how are you
not enjoying this right now?
The other ones that we did,
we knew they were fucked up.
This one's different.
Dude, it is his job
to tell you his sob story.
You can't be feeling bad
for this prick, okay?
Don't let him fool you.
Fuck that.
We've been having too much
fun at these places, man.
No, you've been having
too much fun at these places.
[bird cawing]
[sniffs]
[groans] Okay.
The next one,
we'll go in and out.
Real quick, all right?
You don't have to worry
about their feelings.
-Feelings? Yeah?
-Yeah.
That's not what
this is about, Lars.
Then what's it about, Freddy?
We need to be sure
about this.
How are you
not sure about this?
You read the article.
You heard him in there.
He's changed.
I believe in second chances.
I got one.
No, no, no, no, no, no.
You cannot compare yourself
to this filthy cunt.
You can't do that.
You can't do that.
You know, tell yourself
whatever the fuck you want.
You know this isn't right.
We need to move on.
There are plenty of guys
on the list.
Dude, you are almost
ruining my buzz.
Almost.
Everything's just
a fucking party to you.
Yeah.
Maybe you should try it.
Instead of acting
like a little bitch.
-Oh, I'm a little bitch?
-A little bit, yeah.
Who was crying
like a baby in there?
That was for the show!
Oh, was it for the show?
Yes.
-Fuck you.
-Oh, fuck you.
No, no, no, fuck you.
[bird cawing]
Hey.
He's waking up.
[sings] He's waking up.
[hums]
Hey, sleepyhead!
Did you have any good dreams?
No?
All right, I'm gonna take
the sock out of your mouth.
If you yell, you're going to
the fucking bottom.
You understand me?
Nod that you understand me.
Great.
Ah. Okay. Ugh.
Not a good feeling, huh?
What do you know about it,
you punk?
I was raped
and beaten in prison.
See?
You're not like this animal.
You don't enjoy this torture.
What did I tell you?
Master manipulator.
[Lester] I'm not a liar.
I made mistakes,
but I'm not a monster.
Why do you keep saying that?
I don't hurt anyone anymore.
I voluntarily submit
to chemical castration.
I promise
I won't say anything.
What the fuck
is chemical castration?
I get hormone
injections every month.
I can't even have sex anymore.
[Lars laughs]
Your dick don't work?
What happens if you miss
an appointment then?
You think you're heroes?
You boys watch
too many movies.
You aren't much different
from me.
I made mistakes,
but I'm not a monster.
I made mistakes,
but I'm not a monster.
[sobbing] I made mistakes,
but I'm not a monster.
-I'm not a bad person.
-Let's let him go.
I got it, all right?
You think it's easy?
You think it's easy for me?
It's not easy.
[sobbing]
Please.
Leave me alone.
Hey, let's go.
[Lars] All right.
All right. Fine.
[Lester] I won't say anything.
I-- I--
[water splashing]
[dramatic music]
[muffled screaming]
-[Freddy] Fuck you, Lars.
-[Lars] Look,
no one's gonna miss this guy.
No one.
[Lester gags]
[dramatic music continues]
-This is fucked.
-What are you worried about?
We're doing the work
of the Lord, brother.
This isn't the work
of the Lord.
This isn't why we started this.
Why are you freaking out?
You read the article.
He was bound to fuck up again.
Five kids, Freddy, five.
He-- he had pilot wings, man,
like Dida.
Look at me.
That piece of shit was
nothing
like your grandfather
and he's nothing like you.
He saw our faces, man.
What did you expect?
He was freaked.
He wouldn't have said a thing.
Okay, calm down.
-Calm down, okay?
-[Freddy sighs]
[Lars] What are we
overcoming today?
This isn't right,
and you know it.
Or maybe I'm just
smoking too much today.
Or maybe you're
not smoking enough.
Come on,
let me buy you a steak.
All right? Get your mind
off of everything.
Let me buy you a steak.
-Yeah.
-Yeah?
That'd make you happy?
-You're buying,
that's for damn sure.
-Yeah, yeah.
[Freddy] Go fucking clean up
that egg that you broke.
That was worth
a lot of fucking money.
[Lars] There's another one.
We got the other one.
[dramatic music]
[ominous music]
[water running]
[breathing heavily]
Come on, Bella.
[slaps]
[breathing heavily]
[dramatic music]
[thumping]
Come on, Bella.
Come on!
[breathing heavily]
[screams]
[breathing heavily]
-[thumping]
-[screams]
[loud clatter]
[screams]
[grunts]
[groaning]
[spits]
[breathing heavily]
[laughing]
[laughing]
And the day's worries
Are far from your head
Dream instead
For love never ends
[Emily]
Isabelle, what happened?!
It's Bella,
you stupid bitch!
I'm just here for my flowers.
I don't have
your fucking flowers!
[Emily screams]
God damm it!
[car engine revs]
[breathing heavily]
[grunts]
["No Lighter"
by Strawberry Fuzz]
I got 16 cigarettes
To my name and no lighter
I pray to God
About twice a day
I don't hear nothing
I smell like a wet cigarette
Waking up in the gutter
I found a screwdriver
In the dirt
I put it in my pocket
I don't want to catch no eyes
I don't want to have to use it
I smell like a wet cigarette
Waking up in the gutter
I've had a headache
For 16 days straight
I put cardboard on my car
Windows when it rains
I showed up to the party
And I never went in
[woman] I had them add
some extra eggs for you.
Oh, thank you, darling.
Holly, why don't you just give
my man a lap dance already?
[Holly] I am a server,
not a dancer, but thanks.
Huh, not a dancer,
but you'll take all
my money, huh?
See, dude, that is who
you should be putting
all of your energy into, man.
That girl wants
to drain your nuts.
Do you always
have to be so vulgar?
[Lars] Huh? What'd I say?
You know what you said.
I know what I said.
Look at this.
How are you not doing
anything about that?
Yeah, well,
if you keep talking like that,
I'll never get a shot.
-That's fair.
-Get the fuck outta here.
[snorts]
God, I feel fantastic.
You're gonna come down
off that shit eventually.
Yeah. That chick
at the flower shop totally
digs me, by the way.
-I'm sure she does. [scoffs]
-She does, man.
Yeah, well, I bet she's crazy
like the rest of them.
No, this one's different,
you dick.
She's great.
Black hair, good smile,
I'm telling you.
It's just--
Here's 20, here you go.
She's fantastic.
I'm gonna go visit her
after Christmas.
[blows]
[dancer] Wanna dance, Lars?
[Lars] Hmm. Hello, darling.
I'm gonna give you
a dance, girl.
How about that?
Fuck yourself.
Take me to church.
-Yes, sir.
-[clacks heels]
["Cowboy"
by Strawberry Fuzz]
-Oh, shit, we're out.
-We can't be out already.
-That's mostly on you, big guy.
-I mean, it's the only thing
I do now.
[Lars] Yeah, dude, you gotta
hit the slopes with me, huh?
[Freddy] There's nothing fun
about that, man.
[Lars]
The mystery is kinda fun.
[Freddy]
The mystery in going to jail?
I'm good.
Let's go pick up some more bud.
Ah, you wanna go
see Queen Bee, huh?
You want her to eat that butt?
-Mm.
-You want her to eat that butt?
No one eats Freddy's ass.
Freddy eats ass.
[chuckles]
Even if I let her,
I don't think
she could hold these legs up.
[Lars laughs]
Yeah, maybe not.
Big fat-ass legs.
[]
Hey, boys.
-Hey.
-What's up, Queen Bee?
What's up, Freddy?
Ooh. What is this?
What's happening there? Shit.
-Ahh.
-[grunts] Eww.
You smell like a stripper.
Hey, they're dancers,
not strippers.
I didn't see you boys
out there this morning.
Oh, we got in there early.
The waves were good.
We had some last-minute
Christmas shopping
we had to do.
What else you got in
your honey pot today, Queen Bee?
You want a dab?
-What's that?
-Wax, dude.
Hey, I'm a blunt man.
Mac Daddy Bull Wraps all day.
Mm. I think
you're gonna like it.
Is that a blowtorch?
It's a party now, Cakes.
Look at that shit.
Nah.
You won't be breaking
your rule, Freddy.
Wax is just THC.
It's just a lot stronger
than flower.
I'mma get it going
for you, okay?
Thank you, science.
Okie dokie, Smokey.
[Queen Bee] I'm gonna
set you up right here.
Sit back, relax, and hold onto
your nuts, all right?
Five,
four, three, two,
-[distorted] let's go...
-[coughing]
[distorted voices]
[continues coughing]
You boys like DMT?
No, man. We got to boogie.
-I gotta go see my Baba.
-What's your Baba?
It's my grandmother.
Come on, y'all
wanna stay and do some?
Bring your Baba.
Yeah, no thanks, man.
I got my booger sugar anyway.
We don't need any of that.
Just remember, boys.
Life is like
a roll of toilet paper.
The closer you get to the end,
the faster it goes.
So we best be
enjoying this shit.
Yeah, that's fucked up.
There you go.
-You wanna grab your stuff?
-[Freddy] Got it.
-All right.
-All right, well,
I'm gonna be at El Porto
for a Christmas sesh.
I'll be there.
-I'll be there too.
-Later.
You just wake up?
-Good morning.
-Good morning.
[laughs] Fuck those guys.
Oh, smells so good. Oh.
[vehicle approaching]
Oh, look, there she is.
Hi, Baba.
Garden's looking good, huh?
We should have got her
some white roses.
-Too soon?
-[scoffs]
-No, if it's not from her
garden, she doesn't want 'em.
-Uh, that's fair.
[Freddy] You know, you just
keep messing with that
devil's dandruff, Lars.
-You're getting sloppy.
-[Lars] Oh, okay, yeah.
You know what, you sound like
a little fucking pussy, dude.
-You wanna play that game?
-Yeah.
You're the one who's wearing
a woman's jacket right now.
Fuck you, dude.
I love this coat.
[Freddy] You haven't eaten
anything today.
[Lars] Yeah, I ate...
some fucking tequila.
You know what?
It's a holiday.
Shut the fuck up.
[sighs]
Come on, let's go inside.
We'll watch the, uh--
the Western
that you're gonna do.
Let's watch it with her.
Come on.
You're not coming
inside to watch.
Really? Come on.
You're not watching.
-Why not?
-[scoffs]
She don't like you.
That's bullshit.
You're-- she loves me.
See, look at her.
She's smiling at me.
All right, fine.
Are we still scouting later?
-You want me to pick you up?
-Oh, I forgot something.
Oh, great.
What the fuck am I supposed
to do with that, you dick?
-Let's go inside.
-[Lars] Bye, Baba.
Bye-bye.
Yeah, Freddy, yeah,
good-- good talk, man.
Yeah, I'll--
I'll pick you up later.
[Lars sighs]
[snorts, groans]
Ain't nobody gonna catch us.
We're on a mission from God.
Aren't we, girl?
Yes, sir.
[car engine starts]
-[seatbelt alarm beeping]
-[sniffles]
Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah.
["Carmen, Act I: L'amour
Est Un Oiseau Rebelle" playing]
[singing in French]
[]
[Baba] Come, eat, honey.
Dinner is ready.
I'll be right there, Baba.
Oh, smells so good.
[laughs]
Oh, honey, come on.
Look what I got.
Got you some scratchers.
Oh, thank you.
-Thank you.
-You're always welcome.
Oh, my, we gonna get
a bigger money.
If we win big,
we'll go to Croatia.
[laughs]
That's what we gonna do, huh?
-[laughs]
-Hmm.
[Baba] You gonna love Croatia,
honey.
Beautiful place to go.
Did you have a nice day today?
Yeah, beautiful day, honey.
Beautiful day, I have.
Did you work in
the garden today?
Yes, I did.
You know, roses,
I love roses.
I know,
best flowers in the city.
[laughs] Yeah.
That's my favorite, red roses.
And how are you doing?
Okay?
Yeah, it's a good day.
So far, so good.
How's-- how's Lars doing?
-Lars? [chuckles]
-He's okay?
-Oh, yeah.
-[Baba] Yeah.
Lars.
He's being Lars.
Being a pain, yeah.
-He's doing all right.
-[laughs] Yeah.
Hmm.
So goody goody.
[laughs]
More cheese?
Yeah, I gotta have the cheese.
You know, it is Western night.
-We still gonna watch a Western?
-Yeah, we will.
I was thinking maybe,
uh, The Man in Black.
Yes, that's perfect, honey.
-[laughs]
-Dida's favorite.
Yes, it is. It is.
I love it.
Mm.
I forgot to say grace.
Ah.
[speaking Croatian]
-Amen.
-Amen.
-[laughs] Beautiful.
-Mm.
-Mm.
-Mm-hmm.
It's good pasta. It's good.
-Amazing.
-[laughs]
Eat, honey, eat.
Have yourself
A merry little Christmas
Let your heart be light
[door thuds]
Jack Valentine,
what's happening, baby?
[Jack] Close that.
[Lars] All right, all right.
Shit, God.
This door weighs like a thousand
fucking pounds, by the way.
Wouldn't be so heavy
if you worked out.
[chuckles]
[tattoo gun buzzes]
What do you got
for me this time, Lars?
You ready? [grunts]
Hold on.
Look.
[clucks and sighs]
Look at that shit. See that?
Where's Freddy?
[Lars] Oh, he's at his
grandma's house.
He's being a fucking baby.
That's a big baby.
-Don't touch that.
-Sorry. Sorry.
-What's up?
-What's up, man?
What you getting?
Oh, some Viking shit.
Viking shit.
That's dope.
Cool, cool, cool,
cool, cool, cool.
So, what do you think,
like five?
-Hundred.
-Thousand!
Fuck you, Lars.
Not tonight.
Okay, fine, big guy.
Give you a thousand for it.
[sighs]
Where's the Christmas spirit?
-How about $850?
-Jack! Seriously?
Hey, man,
I'm with my client.
Be a gentleman.
Let me look at it.
Yeah, take a good look, dude.
Worked really hard for this one.
[snorts]
[sighs]
You know, Jack, you collect
a lot of weird shit in here.
[Jack chuckles]
Half of it's from you.
Yeah, I know. But it's just
like all that shit, man.
It's kinda cool.
Hey.
How much are those?
[sighs]
For you, $1,500.
Okay.
Even trade. I'll give you
the egg for those toys.
I just said $1,000
for the egg.
I can't keep doing
this shit with you, man.
Look, in about a month,
couple of months,
it's not gonna be hot anymore.
All right, you can get
five grand for that easy.
Easy, I'm not fucking kidding.
It's like a dinosaur egg, man.
Like, look at it.
It's all painted and shit.
Like, fucking rare, you know?
Okay, I'll even
throw in some coke.
All right, man,
just-- just set me up.
Better not have the pigs
coming around asking about it.
You got nothing
to worry about.
We got a deal?
-Deal.
-[claps]
Fuck yeah, man.
Load 'em up.
Freddy Cakes is
gonna love this shit.
He's gonna love this shit.
[]
They call me Johnny Gage
They say I'm...
A ghost
Left me for dead
They say I'm a devil's man
But I'm just
The man in black
The man in black
-[narrator] Johnny Gage.
-[horse whinnies]
The Man in Black.
[claps]
My cowboys, cowboys.
Beautiful, beautiful.
[laughs]
[cows mooing]
[Guillermo] Mira.
[kisses]
[mooing]
Hombres,
you eat the mama first.
Eh? [laughs]
[speaking in Spanish]
[sniffs]
[spits]
What is it, Alejandro?
What is it?
[bird screeches]
It can't be.
We should go.
[spits]
Listen here, man.
Never miss a chance.
Shut up! Eh?
Make sure the guns
are loaded this time.
[western music]
You got it, Jefe.
Don't worry, mamacita.
After we take care
of this cabron,
come and take care of you.
[kisses]
[Man in Black]
It's a good day.
Set it up!
[western music continues]
[laughs]
Okay, devil man, you wanna
take on the three of us?
Yee-haw!
-You're not even a real cow--
-[gun fires]
Ah!
Bang. Bang.
[laughs]
[dramatic music]
You want one?
[chuckling]
Drinking leads to drugging,
and drugging leads
to the graveyard.
Come on.
You like what you see?
[Lar's voice]
Drink it up, Freddy.
It's just one drop.
Slug that whiskey, boy,
that's yours.
Yeah, your pa couldn't
handle the led either.
[mic feedback]
First one's on me, boys.
Next one's on you, though.
[strumming]
Awaken ye
Awaken ye
Parcy Reed
I, um--
I see the guards aren't
starving you anymore.
You a big boy now?
They did what they could.
[chuckles]
It didn't stop me.
I just draw
whatever I was craving.
Cheeseburger.
Ribeye steak. Pizza.
[chuckles] Hell, Dida,
I even had a Taco Tuesday.
[Dida laughs]
Every time
I'd finish a drawing,
I'd just crumble it up.
-[munching]
-[Dida laughs]
[Freddy laughs]
If they be five
Then we be four
If they be five
Then we be four
Every man...
I've been looking after Baba.
Take one
I know, my unuk.
And only leave
But two for me
We miss you.
It's cowboy night.
Outlaws make the best cowboys.
O turn Johnie
When you was
just a little buck,
you could watch spaghetti
westerns all day long.
[laughs]
[singing continues]
I want you to know,
I only add to the safe now.
Parcy Reed
I was just so fucked up.
[sighs] I was so fucked up.
Hey.
You can still do right...
if in doing wrong.
[song continues]
Fight them
Parcy Reed
Ah!
Parcy Reed
Wake up, Freddy!
Wake up, motherfucker.
Wake up!
[screams]
Set it up!
I've made mistakes.
But I'm not a monster.
-[echoing voices]
-[suspenseful music playing]
[gasps]
[crickets chirping]
-Boom, boom, boom.
-Ow, ow.
[laughs]
[sighs]
-Got you. Got you.
-Yeah, you did.
[western music playing]
[sighs]
I gotta go, Baba.
-I'll see you tomorrow.
-Okay, be careful.
I love you.
See you tomorrow.
Be careful.
-[dramatic music playing]
-[police radio chatter]
[male detective]
Did you see anyone suspicious
around your shop today?
[Rosanna]
No, I wasn't even here.
Bella was all by herself.
I-- why is the security
camera covered?
Ma'am, don't touch that.
[female detective]
Excuse me, miss.
Were you the only witness
to the robbery?
Yes.
Can you tell me what happened
to your knuckles?
I did what I had to do
to survive.
They were animals.
They must be drug addicts.
Miss, can you describe
who did this to you?
-[door clicks]
-[door chime rings]
[]
Hey, Puddin' Pop.
What are you guys doing here?
-[Freddy] Where's the money?
-What?
Where's the fuckin' money?
[Bella screams] Stop!
[Lars]
Where are you going?
Where are you going?
Oh! Take this!
[Bella screams]
[mellow music]
How's that burger?
It's good.
Here.
-What is this?
-Merry Christmas.
What's gotten into you, man?
You trying to sweeten me up
with a burger and some cash?
Yeah, maybe.
Is it working?
Mm.
Good.
All right, I'm gonna roll
a perfect blunt right now.
You ready?
Mm-hmm.
Cakes.
-There's nothing in here.
-No more wraps?
Yeah, dude,
we were just there.
You didn't check?
Been stoned all day.
All right, well,
you wanna go get more?
-[sniffles]
-Let's take a ride.
-Yeah, let's go.
-How about you, Brougham?
You ready to do one more trip?
Hmm?
You want my burger?
Go on, I know you want it.
[sniffles]
Yes, sir.
[car door closes]
All right.
["Merry Christmas Baby"
by James Woods on radio]
Merry Christmas Baby
Hey!
Merry Christmas Baby
You sure been good to me
I said Merry Christmas, baby
Merry Christmas, baby
Ah you sure been good to me
Well I wanna kiss you baby
Oh, while you're standing
Under the mistletoe
Baby
Yeah
Merry Christmas, baby
Merry Christmas
Hey!
[indistinct]
Merry Christmas, baby
[Bella] No, I don't
wanna waste money on that.
My aunt's a nurse.
I'll see her tonight.
I feel so bad about this.
The least I can do
is take you to Urgent Care
and stay with you
on Christmas Eve.
I'm good. I already have plans
with my family.
Bella, isn't this
the arrangement for Emily?
Uh-- I don't know.
I don't-- oh, my God.
My head--
it just hurts really bad.
I'm sorry, Rosanna.
Oh, you poor thing.
You just focus on
letting yourself heal.
You should probably
take some time off.
Yeah, I think
I'll go somewhere.
Like the beach or something.
[Christmas music]
[Jeff laughs]
[sighs]
I made you some cookies.
You like cookies?
Eat as many of them
as you want.
That's the rule in this house,
is that if we want something,
we have as much of it
as we wanna have.
So, help yourself.
[clears throat] And...
please enjoy your juice.
It's delicious.
It's very sweet.
[camera beeps]
I just got this camera.
It's fun.
Do you like taking pictures?
I like to.
[camera shutter clicks]
Yeah.
Yeah.
Let's see.
[beeping]
Yeah.
Uh-huh.
I got it.
How do I zoom in
on this motherfucker?
[beeping]
Fuck this Chinese shit.
Mm.
Do you believe in Santa Claus?
[munching] Mm.
Me, too.
Mm.
[camera beeps]
I hope someday my beard
is as long and white as his.
[camera beeps]
Then I would put you
on my sleigh,
and I would fly you
anywhere you wanna go.
[camera shutter clicks]
Wow.
What a smile.
I've never seen
such a beautiful smile.
You mind if I take
a picture of your smile?
Hmm.
[camera shutter clicks]
Beautiful.
Beautiful.
Drink your medicine.
[mug thuds]
["Twitch"
by The Holycuts]
[camera shutter clicks]
[crickets chirping]
[Lars]
Look at this fucking clown.
That's where we'll enter
right there.
He's got no dogs.
He's just got big boy up there.
He's a thick bastard.
Yeah, man.
You think he eats
more than you?
[scoffs] I doubt it.
[Lars]
Yeah. I could take him.
[Freddy] Yeah?
[Lars] No doubt in my mind.
That's nothing.
Big tree fall hard.
[sighs]
It's gonna be a long night.
-No, it's not.
-No?
-Mm-mm.
-How's that?
I'm gonna check
the electrical box,
-and we're getting out of here.
-Oh.
Rock, paper, scissors
who goes and does it.
-I got this.
-You got this.
You sure?
Keep your eye on this
scum sucker, all right?
All right, Cakes,
watch yourself.
Just don't break anything
this time, all right?
I'm coming for you,
you big bitch.
-[crickets chirping]
-[distant barking]
[clattering]
[gasps]
-[owl hoots]
-Shit.
[wings flapping]
Fucking owls.
[whispering] Freddy?
Freddy?
-[creaks]
-[thuds]
[suspenseful music]
[camera shutter clicks]
[Jeff] I got my finger stuck
in one of these things one time.
Isn't that funny?
[sighs]
Fucking cocksucker.
[whispering] Freddy?
Freddy?
Cakes!
What's wrong?
-Hey, change of plans.
-What are you talking about?
-He's got one, man.
-He's got one what?
He's got a kid in there.
-[camera shutter clicks]
-[Jeff] That's great.
[moans]
Fuck.
What do you wanna do, bud?
We gotta take care of it.
We gotta get him out.
Let's go.
Those even work?
Yeah, like a charm.
-All right.
-Yeah.
I thought I told you to
get rid of these masks
from the Baker job.
I like 'em.
-All right, if we got 'em,
let's use 'em.
-Mm-hmm.
Hey, no hanging around.
We get in. We get out.
Hey, it's a grab and bag.
All right?
Dibs on the big boy.
I bet you 20 bucks I can
rip out his fucking throat.
Let's hunt.
["Train Song"
by Federale]
[snorting]
[coughs]
[music continues]
-[humming]
-[phone rings]
Ho, ho, ho, ho.
Merry Christmas, Dad.
Merry almost. [sniffles]
No. Why are you calling me with
this shit on Christmas Eve?
I'm making cookies.
I made like
ten pounds of dough.
[sniffles] I'm gonna be--
I'm taking them to
the battered women's shelter.
I'm volunteering.
[power switches off]
[munching]
Um...
No, no, no, no.
Let me call you back.
Let me call you back.
The-- the power just
went out or something.
I don't know, the fucking oven
blew a fuse or something.
I'll call--
I'll call you back.
I'll get Mikey, hold on.
Okay, okay, okay.
Shut-- fuck.
Jesus Christ. [sniffles]
Mikey?
Mikey?
[sighs]
Mikey!
Mikey!
Mikey, Mikey, Mikey, Mikey.
You fucking asshole.
What the fuck is this?
Where's your fucking gun,
you fat fuck?
[animals howling]
What the fuck?
-[Christmas tune plays]
-Hello.
Well, I can see that you've
been very good this year.
I'll be sure to have
something special for you
in your stocking.
Ho, ho, ho.
Merry Christmas!
[suspenseful music playing]
[metal clanging]
[Jeff] Shit!
No, no, no.
Fucking stupid.
Fucking stupid, Mikey.
Stupid piece of shit.
Fuck. Fuck.
Fuck.
[panting]
Hi.
Merry Christmas.
[suspenseful music playing]
[panting]
My name is Jeff.
What's your name?
[neck cracks]
You wanna die on
Christmas Eve?
Motherfucker! Huh?
I'll crack your skull
like a fucking walnut.
Ah, shit!
I got you.
Come on. [growling]
-[Freddy growls]
-[gasps]
[thuds]
[punches landing]
[door clicks]
[munching]
[sighs]
[gags]
-What's up with you?
-Nothing, nothing.
-How's the kid?
-He's fine.
-Okay.
-Oh, cookies.
Don't.
Okay.
[door closes]
[car trunk creaks]
Hey, Jeff. Why don't you
get out of the car?
[thuds]
That's it.
Get out of the car,
you piece of shit.
How much money did you ask
my dad to pay you?
[laughs] Money?
We're not doing this for money.
[laughs]
[Lars] We don't really
give a fuck about money.
But you're gonna love
what we got prepared for you.
This is going to be awesome.
Come on.
[Jeff]
I'll go by myself.
Fuck you.
[grunts] Hey, hey.
[Lars] Come on.
It's gonna hurt if
you make this too hard.
-[Jeff groans]
-[Lars] Stay put.
Stay put!
Lift up your arms.
Lift them up.
Set 'em up!
We're going to play
the best game.
Possibly your last game
that you'll ever get to play.
[Jeff]
What the fuck is this?
[Lars]
Oh, you're about to see.
You can mess with
a couple of things,
but you can't fuck
with kids on Christmas.
It looks good.
What do you think?
-Okay, stay right there.
-[panting]
Do not move
or I'm gonna cut your neck.
You understand me?
You can't make me do this.
[Lars] I can.
Oh, you're doing it, boy.
Don't touch that pistol.
You understand me?
Don't touch that yet.
This is a real
cowboy night, boys.
Like a real
fucking Western, huh?
Whoo!
-Rules are simple.
-[Freddy exhales]
I want you to duel.
[western music]
[exhales]
[exhales]
All right.
You gun down Freddy Cakes,
you get to walk out of here,
no questions asked.
But if you jerk that pistol
before I tell you,
I will fucking end you,
you understand me?
Fuck me.
Great.
[sighs]
See, Cakes, this is what
I'm talking about.
[exhales]
[dramatic music]
-Now from this point--
-All right, let's go,
you fucking--
[gunshots]
Ah.
[exhales]
Whoo! Feather fly
like a turkey, baby!
Yeah!
Cakes, you a real
gunslinger now, man.
Ah...
Yeah, outlaws do make
the best cowboys.
Did you just make that up?
Nah, I heard it somewhere.
I love it.
How'd that handle?
-Real smooth.
-Yeah?
-How do you feel?
-[gun clicking]
As long as it's guys
like that, I'm in.
Done. Done.
You know what?
I think I'm gonna buy you
a steak this time.
-[Lars] Oh yeah?
-[Freddy] Yeah.
Sounds like a plan.
One second, though.
Excuse me.
[Jeff gags]
These are mine.
How fucking awesome are these?
[Freddy] Yeah, Valentine
really came through.
[Lars] Oh, this is by far
my favorite one.
Enjoy hell,
you son of a bitch.
[car door closes]
[Jeff choking]
[coughing]
-Fuck, dude, that was sick!
-My fucking heart is pumping.
That was so cool.
It's like when you fucking
did that-- fuck!
Oh. I forgot the kid
was in the car.
Don't scare him, man.
He's wearing your mask.
He scared me.
Hey, bud.
[Lars] You got a place where
we can drop you off?
Like a phone number,
an address, anything?
No? Great.
Well, let's just drop him
off at the hospital
and be done with it.
We're not gonna just
drop him off at the hospital.
Why the fuck not?
You just drive up,
kick him out of the car,
doctors and police,
they're all there.
He'd be great.
It's Christmas Eve,
come on.
What the fuck does that
have to do with anything?
What, are you Santa Claus now?
You gonna give him like
a fucking present?
You need some milk and cookies,
you piece of shit?
[stutters] Fuck you, man.
Maybe I do have
a present for him.
[Lars]
Where'd you get that?
Did you get that
from Lester's house?
I had to clean up
the crime scene.
-What's in it?
-I don't know.
-Let's check it out.
-[Lars] All right.
[chimes tinkling]
Huh.
[boy] What's that?
Nothing. It's nothing.
Nice present.
You ready to take
that mask off?
We got the bad guy.
You saw, right?
Yeah.
You can take it off now.
Here.
Boop. There you go.
Rarrr!
-[boy] Rarrr!
-[laughs] Cool kid, huh?
Yeah, adorable.
What are we gonna do with him?
Oh, I got the place.
Who can take care of a kid?
Oh, that's a good idea,
Cakes, good idea.
[car engine starts]
["Lifeline" by
Clarence Greenwood]
When you're so long gone
You can't help yourself
When you're so dead wrong
Let alone no one else
Well, the children
Still dying in the streets
And babies
Still living with disease
And the cops got guns,
And the poor folks got sons
Who work for Mr. Franklin
Every week
And if you've come
Looking for hard times
Hard times
Ain't hard to find
Because we've been
Given that lifeline
Only once in a lifetime
Baby, we was born
Maybe we were born
To be sure
To endure
When the storm comes
Got them sad eyes
Got them cat eyes
Got them angels tired
From saving
His life and you
Better to contain yourself
Before you end up killed
[humming]
Romans 3:8, okay.
[sniffles]
[chuckles]
[lighter flicks]
["Run, Man, Run"
by Federale]
[Bella]
Sometimes you gotta do bad
to do good.
[seagulls calling]
[whistling in song]
[vocalizing]
Run, run, run
Run, man,
Run, run, run, run
Run, man, run, run
[vocalizing]
[vocalizing]
Run, run, run
Run, man, run, run
Run, run
Run, man, run, run
Run, run
Run, man, run, run
Run, run
Run, man, run, run
[music fades]
-[waves crashing]
-[seagulls calling]
[]
[dog barking]
[Christmas music]
[camera beeps]
Hello.
My name is Jeff,
but please call me Uncle Jeffy.
That's Uncle Mikey.
We're gonna keep you safe.
We're gonna take
good care of you.
You understand?
Uncle Mikey has some
medicine for you.
-Mikey, give him
the fucking medicine.
-[camera beeps]
We put it in some yummy juice,
something in there
to help you rest.
And I got you
some cookies, too.
I got you some cookies.
And then there's
some stuff in here
that's gonna keep you
nice and strong, okay?
[munching] Mmm.
Mmm.
[scraping]
[birds chirping]
[waves crashing]
["Aim For The Heart"
by Federale]
There's a house in the town
At the end of this road
It's a den of fools,
A real mean abode
I'm gonna open the
Door and walk inside
I've got some scores I need
To settle as a point of pride
I've got some
Real bad problems
That I need you to solve
So leave your heart alone
[]
Well there's a wicked man
In a crooked house
He's won a trip down a river
And a widowed spouse
I'm gonna open the door
And walk inside
I've got some scores I need
To settle as a point of pride
I'm getting hungry
For a mean bone
He better aim
For the heart...
[grunts]
[]
[sniffing]
Yeah. You like that, huh?
[muttering]
I'm a karate man,
motherfucker!
[printer humming]
[paper rustling]
Don't work so hard, Bronson.
[man] You almost
done in there?
Yeah, buddy, roll it.
[sniffs]
[soft music]
[birds chirping]
[woman] Bella!
-[phone ringing]
-Mm...
Can you get that, please?
Oh, yeah, never mind,
I'll get it.
Just finish prepping the shop.
We have a new bride
arriving any minute!
[chuckles]
Burgundy Flowers and Gifts.
This is Rosanna speaking.
How may I help you?
Yes, we're open today
from nine AM to four PM.
And we're closed
tomorrow for Christmas.
Mm-hmm.
Yes. Okay.
Bye-bye.
[man]
Bronson, come here, boy.
[door closes]
[water pouring]
["Aim For the Heart"
by Federale]
[blender whirring]
-What's up?
-Where's it at?
Right here.
What is this wonky thing?
It's gonna hit.
Try it.
[lighter flicks]
-See?
-[exhales]
It's not bad.
It's not bad, bad.
Next one, I'll roll.
Oh, okay, yeah, 'cause
you're such the expert.
Why don't you just
roll 'em from now on?
You know, since you're back.
Yeah, sure.
[inhales]
Is it hunting time?
Yeah.
We gotta stop by the flower
shop for this next one.
-Flowers?
-Yeah.
[chuckles]
This next one loves flowers.
[car alarm chirps]
[thuds]
[woman] Nonstop.
All this planning,
it's just been, like,
I don't know.
I gotta go, bye.
Emily, our lovely bride-to-be.
-Oh, you must be Rosanna.
-Yes.
Bella!
You sit right here and relax.
[Emily] I know you.
[gasps] High school, right?
Isabella Caper.
Oh, you know Bella?
You know, I almost
didn't recognize you.
-[chuckles] Bella.
-[chuckles]
Can you believe
it's been almost ten years
since graduation?
[Bella chuckles]
[Emily] How have you been?
Oh, I've been
really good, yeah.
[Emily] Oh, you know
Brad Evans, right?
[seagulls calling]
Well, I'm gonna be
Mrs. Brad Evans.
[Rosanna] I'm gonna
let you two catch up.
I'll bring the samples.
[Emily] Oh, thanks.
Do you have social media?
Give me your phone,
I'll add you.
Uh. You know what,
um, actually my phone's
about to die.
I'll just tell it to you.
Eww, I would die
if my phone died.
[scoffs] Okay, what is it?
BellaBeYou92.
[Emily] Love it.
[Bella] Those are my paintings.
My artwork is sold
through private dealers.
Mm. Okay.
Yeah, I don't really
need this job, you know?
I just like working with flowers
and being one with nature.
Well, I'm glad
everything worked out.
Yeah. Everything is just
great with me.
[Rosanna] Here are the samples!
[Emily] Oh, I could actually
use another for tonight,
my friend's Christmas party.
[Rosanna] Of course, we'll make
something special for her.
Just come back by four
because we close early today.
Totally fine.
Wonderful.
Why don't you get started
on Emily's arrangement?
Sure.
Thanks, Bella.
[chuckles]
-[Bella chuckles]
-[door thuds]
[dogs barking]
-[groans]
-[car door closes]
-Door's locked.
-Yeah.
Gosh, do you mind giving me
some room next time?
You're just
getting too damn big.
You ever thought of that?
-[car revs]
-I like to eat.
Oh, I've noticed.
[slow music on radio]
[upbeat music on radio]
[slow music on radio]
[upbeat music on radio]
[slow music on radio]
["Backstage" by
Strawberry Fuzz]
-All right.
-[turns up volume]
As I walk through
The back door of some club
That I've never been
You came up to me
I came up to you
You had those
Red painted lips
Settle down, there's
a fucking cop behind us.
If they were only
gonna do their goddamn job,
we wouldn't have to do
this shit at all, would we?
[music continues]
All right, I'll just need
a couple hours
with Baba and we'll be good.
Cool, man,
yeah, yeah, yeah.
Wait-- what are you
guys gonna be doing?
Uh-- we're gonna
be watching a movie tonight.
-What kind?
-Just another Western.
Oh, I fucking
love Westerns, man.
Those like classic duels.
Three, two, one, drop.
God, I love that shit.
[Emily] This should cover what
we talked about on the phone.
And there's also like a little
Christmas sprinkle
in there for you.
Oh, thank you.
Oh, this is more than enough.
[Emily] Oh, I have
to go in a minute.
I have an appointment
with the doctor.
[Rosanna] Sure you can drive?
Maybe we should
call you an Uber.
No, I'm totally fine.
Okay, well,
let me get you some water.
Oh, okay.
[clears throat]
Hey guys, Emily here.
I'm here at the best
flower shop ever.
Ten percent discount
for new customers!
Ha-- making arrangements
for the best wedding ever!
#EVANSWEDDING
#EMILYBEYOU
#UNICORNLIFE
I will be back at four...
for my order. [chuckles]
Okay, see you at four.
-[Emily] Oh, love you.
-Oh. [chuckles]
Mmm. Bye.
[Rosanna] Bye.
Bella, can you put this
in the register?
Make sure you finish
that arrangement by four.
I need to do a little
last-minute Christmas shopping.
-Okay.
-Remember,
not to take a lunch break today
because we're closing early.
We need to get in as much
business as possible today.
[Bella sighs]
All set?
Okay.
[Rosanna]
Thank you, Bella. Bye.
-[door closes]
-[sighs]
[]
-[door chime ringing]
-What'd you forget--
Hello, how are you today?
-Fine.
-[tapping on window]
Can I help you with something?
I hope so, yeah.
Hey, he's gonna
break the glass.
[tapping on glass]
Something tells
me you wouldn't mind
a little glass breaking
around here, huh?
Freddy!
Get off the glass, man.
Sorry about that.
Where were we?
You needed something?
Yeah, I want your
biggest and your best.
Money is no object.
What do you got?
You can have
that one for $250.
Actually, do you got
something for like 100 bucks?
I don't wanna spend
that much on a chomo.
Sure. Is this for
like Christmas or--
More of like a...
special occasion, you know?
Okay, just
give me a minute.
Okay.
Delivery for Lester Irwin.
[chuckles]
[doll whirring]
[door chime rings]
[approaching footsteps]
-Hello.
-Hi.
[Rosanna] Bella, have you been
helping this young man?
Yeah, I literally
just made this for him.
[Rosanna]
Oh, I forgot my glasses.
I'll just let you finish up.
Thank you.
Man, she's a real pain, huh?
Why don't you just
get rid of her?
If you're not up to the task,
I could, uh--
I could help you.
We could bury her alive
and then plant flowers
on top of her grave.
-[chuckles]
-[forced chuckles]
So, who's
this Christmas gift for?
It's actually for a funeral.
-Oh, my condolences.
-Thank you.
-Would you like
a complimentary ribbon?
-She's hooking me up.
-Oh, was it a person
or an animal?
-Both.
-Oh.
But I don't wanna talk
about it, if that's okay.
Well, I found my glasses,
so I'll see you a little later.
[chuckles] Happy holidays,
young man.
And to you.
[door chime rings]
Isn't she sweet?
-[door closes]
-I would totally kill her.
Just... [gags]
I wish I didn't have to go,
but you know,
what are you gonna do?
Thank you so much again
for this, Miss, uh...
Bella.
Oh.
That's for you.
Thank you.
Happy holidays.
-Merry Christmas.
-[door chime rings]
["Norma, Act I: Casta Diva"
playing]
[singing in Italian]
[sizzling]
[song continues]
[knocking]
[doorbell ringing]
[man] Delivery!
[knocking]
[doorbell ringing]
[music turns off]
[soft clatter]
[knocking]
Delivery for Lester Irwin?
Hi, sir.
I can see you.
Do you want your flowers?
[Lester]
I didn't order flowers.
You have the wrong address.
No, it says here
I have the right address.
Who are they from?
I'm sorry, sir, I can't
give you that information.
You know, it's--
it's probably from St. Nick.
Early Christmas present and all.
Just leave them by the door.
You know, I would,
but my boss needs you
to sign this form indicating
that you received the flowers
or else I'm gonna
get in trouble.
And he'll chew me out,
yada, yada. You know?
But, um-- if you--
if you can't sign,
I'm gonna have to
just take them back.
Okay. I'll be on my way.
Merry Christmas to you.
[Lester] Okay. I'll sign.
Wonderful.
-[door opens]
-Hi, sir.
If you can just sign for me
right at the bottom right there.
Great. Here you go.
And Merry Christmas to you.
[Lester sniffs]
[door creaks]
[knocking]
So sorry to bother
you again, sir.
Can I use your bathroom?
I really need to go.
And I have a long way back.
I'd rather you not.
Please?
I mean, it's--
it's Christmas Eve.
I brought you flowers
and you won't let me
use your toilet?
Now is not a good time.
I really gotta go.
-Oh, okay.
-[unzips]
No! Please stop!
Make it quick.
Oh, thank you so much, sir.
I really appreciate that.
[Lester] The bathroom is on
your left out by the fridge.
Oh. Okay.
[Lester sniffs]
Just a quick piss.
And I'll get out of your hair.
[Lester sniffs]
Hey. You have my phone?
No, amigo.
Haven't seen it.
What company
you work for?
Burgundy Flowers.
What's your name?
[kettle whistling]
[groans]
That was perfect. Thank you.
Oh, are you making us tea?
[Lester]
I don't have time for this.
Listen,
I need you to leave now.
Well, that's just rude, Lester.
I just wanted
a cup of tea, mate.
That's it. Just a little.
-Yeah?
-I know you must have my phone.
Do you have Lapsang?
[Lester] What?
That's like
my favorite tea, you know?
You know, I get it.
I'd be upset too if some
random guy came into my house,
took a shit in my toilet,
and I didn't even know his name.
[sighs] Forgive me.
Allow me to introduce
myself, shall we?
I'm Lars Dubois.
I will not shake your hand.
I'm really very sick
and not feeling well at all.
Oh. Okay.
[Lester] Excuse me,
what are you doing now?
You need to get out
of my house.
I have guests coming
over any minute.
You have guests coming?
On, what, Christmas Eve?
Where's your tree then?
-You a Jew?
-Please go.
I'm not going anywhere.
You have to go.
Or I'll call the--
You'll call the what?
The police?
-I'll do it.
-With what? This phone?
-I'll call!
-Yeah?
Sit your fucking ass down!
[phone beeping]
[Lester] I'm sorry. I--
I didn't mean to charge you.
Can you please
put my phone down and go?
What is this?
It's your burner phone?
Where's your real phone?
That is my real phone.
-And where's your computer?
-I don't have Internet.
I don't want it.
[laughs]
Lester, Lester, Lester.
The roads we take
and the choices we make, huh?
I don't know
what this is about.
I don't have much money,
but I can give you
whatever is in my wallet.
I don't want
your fucking money.
I don't want your money.
-[knocking at door]
-But he might.
[Freddy] Dude, door's locked.
What the fuck?
I'm sorry, I got preoccupied.
I hope you don't mind.
I brought a friend.
I didn't interrupt, did I?
[Lars] Here.
Wow, what a beautiful
place you have, Lester.
What do you want from me?
Oh, we'll get to that.
You mind if
I give myself a little tour?
I do!
-I do mind!
-You stand up again,
I will break your fucking jaw!
We all know you don't pick on
people your own
size now, don't we?
[drawer closes]
Fuck.
[sighs]
-[glass shatters]
-[Lars] Fuck.
[Lester] You animal!
That was priceless.
Oops.
Ah, fuck!
That was a pretty penny, man.
-It slipped.
-Yeah, you're getting sloppy.
You can still
get a lot of money
for the other, right?
-Just take it and--
-Sit down!
[table grating on floor]
[groans]
We're gonna play
a little game, Lester.
I don't wanna
play any games with you.
The rules are pretty simple.
My man Freddy over here is gonna
look through all of your shit,
and if we find
something... questionable,
I'm gonna hurt you.
But if we don't, we'll just go.
No problem.
But we're gonna find
something, aren't we?
'Cause today, I am your judge,
I'm your jury,
and I'm your executioner.
Seems like this game
is already rigged against me.
You won't find what
you're looking for.
Only God can judge me.
Ha! You hear that?
Did Jesus save you, Lester?
I accepted the Lord
when I was in prison.
Fifteen years I spent in there
for the mistakes I made.
I've been out for nine years.
It's been a long time
since I hurt anyone,
even with the life I led
and the horrible
things I've done.
God has forgiven me.
[snorts, laughs]
Who are you to judge?
I dealt with punks
like you in prison.
I think they dealt
with you, huh, Lester?
Have you been naughty?
Or have you been nice?
Is Freddy Cakes
gonna find something
that's gonna make
me fucking hurt you?
Look! "Not Today."
"Not Ever Again."
I made mistakes.
But I'm not a monster.
[clapping]
-Heavy.
-[Freddy sniffs]
Very, very heavy.
[Freddy] Bacon.
-What?
-I smell bacon.
[sniffs]
Bacon, but no fucking eggs?
If you're gonna
kill me, just do it.
I can barely live
with myself anyway.
Slow down.
What do you want from me?
You ever see
those stupid rich kids
point at a globe and wherever
their finger lands,
that's where they go?
That's what me and Freddy
do on that website
that you're all so famous on.
Minus the rich kid part.
[sighs] I made mistakes,
but I'm not a monster.
I live my life every day
avoiding temptation.
I keep myself like
a prisoner here.
Even on Halloween,
my lights are out.
Do I look like
I celebrate holidays?
It's not all my fault.
I was abused myself as a child.
We were all abused
in some way, Lester.
We don't all fuck kids.
Please believe me,
I have changed.
I do all I can to be good.
I go to church.
I pray.
Were you abused as a kid?
Is that why you're doing this?
Maybe.
Maybe.
Why the fuck would
you ask me that?
[crying]
You have no idea
what people like you
have done to people like me.
[crying]
Or...
I'm a vigilante!
A hero!
I seek justice on those
who hurt innocent children.
Whatever one sounded
more convincing,
you pick that one.
[Freddy munching]
No, thank you.
-[thuds]
-[doorbell rings]
-Help! Don't--
-[punch thuds]
Whoo!
[music playing on headphones]
What is Christmas?
Christmas is for caring
What is Christmas?
Bulk up.
Meat.
Mmm. I like meat.
Gains, brah.
Be like Brad.
-[sighs]
-[door chime rings]
-Hi.
-Well, hello.
I need a gift for my wife.
Do you know
her favorite flower?
Oh, one of those, uh--
you know, one of those white
ones that smells good?
-Actually, the--
-White lilies.
Yep, I'm sure
it's white lilies.
Great. Will you be paying
cash or card?
I'll pay with a card.
That's fine, but we
just prefer cash if possible.
I'm just gonna
grab you a ribbon.
It's on the house.
[camera shutter clicking]
So, do you live around
here, Mr. Whitley?
Yes, uh, we are local.
Oh, that's nice.
Would you say you're more
South Torrance or Palos Verdes?
We have a lovely home
on the hill.
Okay, I think I know
that area.
Um, 90275, right?
You have some family
or friends up there?
[scoffs] How do you know
I don't live up there?
Because I do. [laughs]
-I-- I didn't mean--
-I know, I know.
Don't even worry about it.
Merry Christmas.
["La Fiamma Del Tuo Amore"
playing]
[singing in Spanish]
[lighter flicks]
[phone beeping]
Nothing.
[spits]
[bottle clinks]
[groans]
Nothing.
I'm not feeling this, man.
Dude, how are you
not enjoying this right now?
The other ones that we did,
we knew they were fucked up.
This one's different.
Dude, it is his job
to tell you his sob story.
You can't be feeling bad
for this prick, okay?
Don't let him fool you.
Fuck that.
We've been having too much
fun at these places, man.
No, you've been having
too much fun at these places.
[bird cawing]
[sniffs]
[groans] Okay.
The next one,
we'll go in and out.
Real quick, all right?
You don't have to worry
about their feelings.
-Feelings? Yeah?
-Yeah.
That's not what
this is about, Lars.
Then what's it about, Freddy?
We need to be sure
about this.
How are you
not sure about this?
You read the article.
You heard him in there.
He's changed.
I believe in second chances.
I got one.
No, no, no, no, no, no.
You cannot compare yourself
to this filthy cunt.
You can't do that.
You can't do that.
You know, tell yourself
whatever the fuck you want.
You know this isn't right.
We need to move on.
There are plenty of guys
on the list.
Dude, you are almost
ruining my buzz.
Almost.
Everything's just
a fucking party to you.
Yeah.
Maybe you should try it.
Instead of acting
like a little bitch.
-Oh, I'm a little bitch?
-A little bit, yeah.
Who was crying
like a baby in there?
That was for the show!
Oh, was it for the show?
Yes.
-Fuck you.
-Oh, fuck you.
No, no, no, fuck you.
[bird cawing]
Hey.
He's waking up.
[sings] He's waking up.
[hums]
Hey, sleepyhead!
Did you have any good dreams?
No?
All right, I'm gonna take
the sock out of your mouth.
If you yell, you're going to
the fucking bottom.
You understand me?
Nod that you understand me.
Great.
Ah. Okay. Ugh.
Not a good feeling, huh?
What do you know about it,
you punk?
I was raped
and beaten in prison.
See?
You're not like this animal.
You don't enjoy this torture.
What did I tell you?
Master manipulator.
[Lester] I'm not a liar.
I made mistakes,
but I'm not a monster.
Why do you keep saying that?
I don't hurt anyone anymore.
I voluntarily submit
to chemical castration.
I promise
I won't say anything.
What the fuck
is chemical castration?
I get hormone
injections every month.
I can't even have sex anymore.
[Lars laughs]
Your dick don't work?
What happens if you miss
an appointment then?
You think you're heroes?
You boys watch
too many movies.
You aren't much different
from me.
I made mistakes,
but I'm not a monster.
I made mistakes,
but I'm not a monster.
[sobbing] I made mistakes,
but I'm not a monster.
-I'm not a bad person.
-Let's let him go.
I got it, all right?
You think it's easy?
You think it's easy for me?
It's not easy.
[sobbing]
Please.
Leave me alone.
Hey, let's go.
[Lars] All right.
All right. Fine.
[Lester] I won't say anything.
I-- I--
[water splashing]
[dramatic music]
[muffled screaming]
-[Freddy] Fuck you, Lars.
-[Lars] Look,
no one's gonna miss this guy.
No one.
[Lester gags]
[dramatic music continues]
-This is fucked.
-What are you worried about?
We're doing the work
of the Lord, brother.
This isn't the work
of the Lord.
This isn't why we started this.
Why are you freaking out?
You read the article.
He was bound to fuck up again.
Five kids, Freddy, five.
He-- he had pilot wings, man,
like Dida.
Look at me.
That piece of shit was
nothing
like your grandfather
and he's nothing like you.
He saw our faces, man.
What did you expect?
He was freaked.
He wouldn't have said a thing.
Okay, calm down.
-Calm down, okay?
-[Freddy sighs]
[Lars] What are we
overcoming today?
This isn't right,
and you know it.
Or maybe I'm just
smoking too much today.
Or maybe you're
not smoking enough.
Come on,
let me buy you a steak.
All right? Get your mind
off of everything.
Let me buy you a steak.
-Yeah.
-Yeah?
That'd make you happy?
-You're buying,
that's for damn sure.
-Yeah, yeah.
[Freddy] Go fucking clean up
that egg that you broke.
That was worth
a lot of fucking money.
[Lars] There's another one.
We got the other one.
[dramatic music]
[ominous music]
[water running]
[breathing heavily]
Come on, Bella.
[slaps]
[breathing heavily]
[dramatic music]
[thumping]
Come on, Bella.
Come on!
[breathing heavily]
[screams]
[breathing heavily]
-[thumping]
-[screams]
[loud clatter]
[screams]
[grunts]
[groaning]
[spits]
[breathing heavily]
[laughing]
[laughing]
And the day's worries
Are far from your head
Dream instead
For love never ends
[Emily]
Isabelle, what happened?!
It's Bella,
you stupid bitch!
I'm just here for my flowers.
I don't have
your fucking flowers!
[Emily screams]
God damm it!
[car engine revs]
[breathing heavily]
[grunts]
["No Lighter"
by Strawberry Fuzz]
I got 16 cigarettes
To my name and no lighter
I pray to God
About twice a day
I don't hear nothing
I smell like a wet cigarette
Waking up in the gutter
I found a screwdriver
In the dirt
I put it in my pocket
I don't want to catch no eyes
I don't want to have to use it
I smell like a wet cigarette
Waking up in the gutter
I've had a headache
For 16 days straight
I put cardboard on my car
Windows when it rains
I showed up to the party
And I never went in
[woman] I had them add
some extra eggs for you.
Oh, thank you, darling.
Holly, why don't you just give
my man a lap dance already?
[Holly] I am a server,
not a dancer, but thanks.
Huh, not a dancer,
but you'll take all
my money, huh?
See, dude, that is who
you should be putting
all of your energy into, man.
That girl wants
to drain your nuts.
Do you always
have to be so vulgar?
[Lars] Huh? What'd I say?
You know what you said.
I know what I said.
Look at this.
How are you not doing
anything about that?
Yeah, well,
if you keep talking like that,
I'll never get a shot.
-That's fair.
-Get the fuck outta here.
[snorts]
God, I feel fantastic.
You're gonna come down
off that shit eventually.
Yeah. That chick
at the flower shop totally
digs me, by the way.
-I'm sure she does. [scoffs]
-She does, man.
Yeah, well, I bet she's crazy
like the rest of them.
No, this one's different,
you dick.
She's great.
Black hair, good smile,
I'm telling you.
It's just--
Here's 20, here you go.
She's fantastic.
I'm gonna go visit her
after Christmas.
[blows]
[dancer] Wanna dance, Lars?
[Lars] Hmm. Hello, darling.
I'm gonna give you
a dance, girl.
How about that?
Fuck yourself.
Take me to church.
-Yes, sir.
-[clacks heels]
["Cowboy"
by Strawberry Fuzz]
-Oh, shit, we're out.
-We can't be out already.
-That's mostly on you, big guy.
-I mean, it's the only thing
I do now.
[Lars] Yeah, dude, you gotta
hit the slopes with me, huh?
[Freddy] There's nothing fun
about that, man.
[Lars]
The mystery is kinda fun.
[Freddy]
The mystery in going to jail?
I'm good.
Let's go pick up some more bud.
Ah, you wanna go
see Queen Bee, huh?
You want her to eat that butt?
-Mm.
-You want her to eat that butt?
No one eats Freddy's ass.
Freddy eats ass.
[chuckles]
Even if I let her,
I don't think
she could hold these legs up.
[Lars laughs]
Yeah, maybe not.
Big fat-ass legs.
[]
Hey, boys.
-Hey.
-What's up, Queen Bee?
What's up, Freddy?
Ooh. What is this?
What's happening there? Shit.
-Ahh.
-[grunts] Eww.
You smell like a stripper.
Hey, they're dancers,
not strippers.
I didn't see you boys
out there this morning.
Oh, we got in there early.
The waves were good.
We had some last-minute
Christmas shopping
we had to do.
What else you got in
your honey pot today, Queen Bee?
You want a dab?
-What's that?
-Wax, dude.
Hey, I'm a blunt man.
Mac Daddy Bull Wraps all day.
Mm. I think
you're gonna like it.
Is that a blowtorch?
It's a party now, Cakes.
Look at that shit.
Nah.
You won't be breaking
your rule, Freddy.
Wax is just THC.
It's just a lot stronger
than flower.
I'mma get it going
for you, okay?
Thank you, science.
Okie dokie, Smokey.
[Queen Bee] I'm gonna
set you up right here.
Sit back, relax, and hold onto
your nuts, all right?
Five,
four, three, two,
-[distorted] let's go...
-[coughing]
[distorted voices]
[continues coughing]
You boys like DMT?
No, man. We got to boogie.
-I gotta go see my Baba.
-What's your Baba?
It's my grandmother.
Come on, y'all
wanna stay and do some?
Bring your Baba.
Yeah, no thanks, man.
I got my booger sugar anyway.
We don't need any of that.
Just remember, boys.
Life is like
a roll of toilet paper.
The closer you get to the end,
the faster it goes.
So we best be
enjoying this shit.
Yeah, that's fucked up.
There you go.
-You wanna grab your stuff?
-[Freddy] Got it.
-All right.
-All right, well,
I'm gonna be at El Porto
for a Christmas sesh.
I'll be there.
-I'll be there too.
-Later.
You just wake up?
-Good morning.
-Good morning.
[laughs] Fuck those guys.
Oh, smells so good. Oh.
[vehicle approaching]
Oh, look, there she is.
Hi, Baba.
Garden's looking good, huh?
We should have got her
some white roses.
-Too soon?
-[scoffs]
-No, if it's not from her
garden, she doesn't want 'em.
-Uh, that's fair.
[Freddy] You know, you just
keep messing with that
devil's dandruff, Lars.
-You're getting sloppy.
-[Lars] Oh, okay, yeah.
You know what, you sound like
a little fucking pussy, dude.
-You wanna play that game?
-Yeah.
You're the one who's wearing
a woman's jacket right now.
Fuck you, dude.
I love this coat.
[Freddy] You haven't eaten
anything today.
[Lars] Yeah, I ate...
some fucking tequila.
You know what?
It's a holiday.
Shut the fuck up.
[sighs]
Come on, let's go inside.
We'll watch the, uh--
the Western
that you're gonna do.
Let's watch it with her.
Come on.
You're not coming
inside to watch.
Really? Come on.
You're not watching.
-Why not?
-[scoffs]
She don't like you.
That's bullshit.
You're-- she loves me.
See, look at her.
She's smiling at me.
All right, fine.
Are we still scouting later?
-You want me to pick you up?
-Oh, I forgot something.
Oh, great.
What the fuck am I supposed
to do with that, you dick?
-Let's go inside.
-[Lars] Bye, Baba.
Bye-bye.
Yeah, Freddy, yeah,
good-- good talk, man.
Yeah, I'll--
I'll pick you up later.
[Lars sighs]
[snorts, groans]
Ain't nobody gonna catch us.
We're on a mission from God.
Aren't we, girl?
Yes, sir.
[car engine starts]
-[seatbelt alarm beeping]
-[sniffles]
Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah.
["Carmen, Act I: L'amour
Est Un Oiseau Rebelle" playing]
[singing in French]
[]
[Baba] Come, eat, honey.
Dinner is ready.
I'll be right there, Baba.
Oh, smells so good.
[laughs]
Oh, honey, come on.
Look what I got.
Got you some scratchers.
Oh, thank you.
-Thank you.
-You're always welcome.
Oh, my, we gonna get
a bigger money.
If we win big,
we'll go to Croatia.
[laughs]
That's what we gonna do, huh?
-[laughs]
-Hmm.
[Baba] You gonna love Croatia,
honey.
Beautiful place to go.
Did you have a nice day today?
Yeah, beautiful day, honey.
Beautiful day, I have.
Did you work in
the garden today?
Yes, I did.
You know, roses,
I love roses.
I know,
best flowers in the city.
[laughs] Yeah.
That's my favorite, red roses.
And how are you doing?
Okay?
Yeah, it's a good day.
So far, so good.
How's-- how's Lars doing?
-Lars? [chuckles]
-He's okay?
-Oh, yeah.
-[Baba] Yeah.
Lars.
He's being Lars.
Being a pain, yeah.
-He's doing all right.
-[laughs] Yeah.
Hmm.
So goody goody.
[laughs]
More cheese?
Yeah, I gotta have the cheese.
You know, it is Western night.
-We still gonna watch a Western?
-Yeah, we will.
I was thinking maybe,
uh, The Man in Black.
Yes, that's perfect, honey.
-[laughs]
-Dida's favorite.
Yes, it is. It is.
I love it.
Mm.
I forgot to say grace.
Ah.
[speaking Croatian]
-Amen.
-Amen.
-[laughs] Beautiful.
-Mm.
-Mm.
-Mm-hmm.
It's good pasta. It's good.
-Amazing.
-[laughs]
Eat, honey, eat.
Have yourself
A merry little Christmas
Let your heart be light
[door thuds]
Jack Valentine,
what's happening, baby?
[Jack] Close that.
[Lars] All right, all right.
Shit, God.
This door weighs like a thousand
fucking pounds, by the way.
Wouldn't be so heavy
if you worked out.
[chuckles]
[tattoo gun buzzes]
What do you got
for me this time, Lars?
You ready? [grunts]
Hold on.
Look.
[clucks and sighs]
Look at that shit. See that?
Where's Freddy?
[Lars] Oh, he's at his
grandma's house.
He's being a fucking baby.
That's a big baby.
-Don't touch that.
-Sorry. Sorry.
-What's up?
-What's up, man?
What you getting?
Oh, some Viking shit.
Viking shit.
That's dope.
Cool, cool, cool,
cool, cool, cool.
So, what do you think,
like five?
-Hundred.
-Thousand!
Fuck you, Lars.
Not tonight.
Okay, fine, big guy.
Give you a thousand for it.
[sighs]
Where's the Christmas spirit?
-How about $850?
-Jack! Seriously?
Hey, man,
I'm with my client.
Be a gentleman.
Let me look at it.
Yeah, take a good look, dude.
Worked really hard for this one.
[snorts]
[sighs]
You know, Jack, you collect
a lot of weird shit in here.
[Jack chuckles]
Half of it's from you.
Yeah, I know. But it's just
like all that shit, man.
It's kinda cool.
Hey.
How much are those?
[sighs]
For you, $1,500.
Okay.
Even trade. I'll give you
the egg for those toys.
I just said $1,000
for the egg.
I can't keep doing
this shit with you, man.
Look, in about a month,
couple of months,
it's not gonna be hot anymore.
All right, you can get
five grand for that easy.
Easy, I'm not fucking kidding.
It's like a dinosaur egg, man.
Like, look at it.
It's all painted and shit.
Like, fucking rare, you know?
Okay, I'll even
throw in some coke.
All right, man,
just-- just set me up.
Better not have the pigs
coming around asking about it.
You got nothing
to worry about.
We got a deal?
-Deal.
-[claps]
Fuck yeah, man.
Load 'em up.
Freddy Cakes is
gonna love this shit.
He's gonna love this shit.
[]
They call me Johnny Gage
They say I'm...
A ghost
Left me for dead
They say I'm a devil's man
But I'm just
The man in black
The man in black
-[narrator] Johnny Gage.
-[horse whinnies]
The Man in Black.
[claps]
My cowboys, cowboys.
Beautiful, beautiful.
[laughs]
[cows mooing]
[Guillermo] Mira.
[kisses]
[mooing]
Hombres,
you eat the mama first.
Eh? [laughs]
[speaking in Spanish]
[sniffs]
[spits]
What is it, Alejandro?
What is it?
[bird screeches]
It can't be.
We should go.
[spits]
Listen here, man.
Never miss a chance.
Shut up! Eh?
Make sure the guns
are loaded this time.
[western music]
You got it, Jefe.
Don't worry, mamacita.
After we take care
of this cabron,
come and take care of you.
[kisses]
[Man in Black]
It's a good day.
Set it up!
[western music continues]
[laughs]
Okay, devil man, you wanna
take on the three of us?
Yee-haw!
-You're not even a real cow--
-[gun fires]
Ah!
Bang. Bang.
[laughs]
[dramatic music]
You want one?
[chuckling]
Drinking leads to drugging,
and drugging leads
to the graveyard.
Come on.
You like what you see?
[Lar's voice]
Drink it up, Freddy.
It's just one drop.
Slug that whiskey, boy,
that's yours.
Yeah, your pa couldn't
handle the led either.
[mic feedback]
First one's on me, boys.
Next one's on you, though.
[strumming]
Awaken ye
Awaken ye
Parcy Reed
I, um--
I see the guards aren't
starving you anymore.
You a big boy now?
They did what they could.
[chuckles]
It didn't stop me.
I just draw
whatever I was craving.
Cheeseburger.
Ribeye steak. Pizza.
[chuckles] Hell, Dida,
I even had a Taco Tuesday.
[Dida laughs]
Every time
I'd finish a drawing,
I'd just crumble it up.
-[munching]
-[Dida laughs]
[Freddy laughs]
If they be five
Then we be four
If they be five
Then we be four
Every man...
I've been looking after Baba.
Take one
I know, my unuk.
And only leave
But two for me
We miss you.
It's cowboy night.
Outlaws make the best cowboys.
O turn Johnie
When you was
just a little buck,
you could watch spaghetti
westerns all day long.
[laughs]
[singing continues]
I want you to know,
I only add to the safe now.
Parcy Reed
I was just so fucked up.
[sighs] I was so fucked up.
Hey.
You can still do right...
if in doing wrong.
[song continues]
Fight them
Parcy Reed
Ah!
Parcy Reed
Wake up, Freddy!
Wake up, motherfucker.
Wake up!
[screams]
Set it up!
I've made mistakes.
But I'm not a monster.
-[echoing voices]
-[suspenseful music playing]
[gasps]
[crickets chirping]
-Boom, boom, boom.
-Ow, ow.
[laughs]
[sighs]
-Got you. Got you.
-Yeah, you did.
[western music playing]
[sighs]
I gotta go, Baba.
-I'll see you tomorrow.
-Okay, be careful.
I love you.
See you tomorrow.
Be careful.
-[dramatic music playing]
-[police radio chatter]
[male detective]
Did you see anyone suspicious
around your shop today?
[Rosanna]
No, I wasn't even here.
Bella was all by herself.
I-- why is the security
camera covered?
Ma'am, don't touch that.
[female detective]
Excuse me, miss.
Were you the only witness
to the robbery?
Yes.
Can you tell me what happened
to your knuckles?
I did what I had to do
to survive.
They were animals.
They must be drug addicts.
Miss, can you describe
who did this to you?
-[door clicks]
-[door chime rings]
[]
Hey, Puddin' Pop.
What are you guys doing here?
-[Freddy] Where's the money?
-What?
Where's the fuckin' money?
[Bella screams] Stop!
[Lars]
Where are you going?
Where are you going?
Oh! Take this!
[Bella screams]
[mellow music]
How's that burger?
It's good.
Here.
-What is this?
-Merry Christmas.
What's gotten into you, man?
You trying to sweeten me up
with a burger and some cash?
Yeah, maybe.
Is it working?
Mm.
Good.
All right, I'm gonna roll
a perfect blunt right now.
You ready?
Mm-hmm.
Cakes.
-There's nothing in here.
-No more wraps?
Yeah, dude,
we were just there.
You didn't check?
Been stoned all day.
All right, well,
you wanna go get more?
-[sniffles]
-Let's take a ride.
-Yeah, let's go.
-How about you, Brougham?
You ready to do one more trip?
Hmm?
You want my burger?
Go on, I know you want it.
[sniffles]
Yes, sir.
[car door closes]
All right.
["Merry Christmas Baby"
by James Woods on radio]
Merry Christmas Baby
Hey!
Merry Christmas Baby
You sure been good to me
I said Merry Christmas, baby
Merry Christmas, baby
Ah you sure been good to me
Well I wanna kiss you baby
Oh, while you're standing
Under the mistletoe
Baby
Yeah
Merry Christmas, baby
Merry Christmas
Hey!
[indistinct]
Merry Christmas, baby
[Bella] No, I don't
wanna waste money on that.
My aunt's a nurse.
I'll see her tonight.
I feel so bad about this.
The least I can do
is take you to Urgent Care
and stay with you
on Christmas Eve.
I'm good. I already have plans
with my family.
Bella, isn't this
the arrangement for Emily?
Uh-- I don't know.
I don't-- oh, my God.
My head--
it just hurts really bad.
I'm sorry, Rosanna.
Oh, you poor thing.
You just focus on
letting yourself heal.
You should probably
take some time off.
Yeah, I think
I'll go somewhere.
Like the beach or something.
[Christmas music]
[Jeff laughs]
[sighs]
I made you some cookies.
You like cookies?
Eat as many of them
as you want.
That's the rule in this house,
is that if we want something,
we have as much of it
as we wanna have.
So, help yourself.
[clears throat] And...
please enjoy your juice.
It's delicious.
It's very sweet.
[camera beeps]
I just got this camera.
It's fun.
Do you like taking pictures?
I like to.
[camera shutter clicks]
Yeah.
Yeah.
Let's see.
[beeping]
Yeah.
Uh-huh.
I got it.
How do I zoom in
on this motherfucker?
[beeping]
Fuck this Chinese shit.
Mm.
Do you believe in Santa Claus?
[munching] Mm.
Me, too.
Mm.
[camera beeps]
I hope someday my beard
is as long and white as his.
[camera beeps]
Then I would put you
on my sleigh,
and I would fly you
anywhere you wanna go.
[camera shutter clicks]
Wow.
What a smile.
I've never seen
such a beautiful smile.
You mind if I take
a picture of your smile?
Hmm.
[camera shutter clicks]
Beautiful.
Beautiful.
Drink your medicine.
[mug thuds]
["Twitch"
by The Holycuts]
[camera shutter clicks]
[crickets chirping]
[Lars]
Look at this fucking clown.
That's where we'll enter
right there.
He's got no dogs.
He's just got big boy up there.
He's a thick bastard.
Yeah, man.
You think he eats
more than you?
[scoffs] I doubt it.
[Lars]
Yeah. I could take him.
[Freddy] Yeah?
[Lars] No doubt in my mind.
That's nothing.
Big tree fall hard.
[sighs]
It's gonna be a long night.
-No, it's not.
-No?
-Mm-mm.
-How's that?
I'm gonna check
the electrical box,
-and we're getting out of here.
-Oh.
Rock, paper, scissors
who goes and does it.
-I got this.
-You got this.
You sure?
Keep your eye on this
scum sucker, all right?
All right, Cakes,
watch yourself.
Just don't break anything
this time, all right?
I'm coming for you,
you big bitch.
-[crickets chirping]
-[distant barking]
[clattering]
[gasps]
-[owl hoots]
-Shit.
[wings flapping]
Fucking owls.
[whispering] Freddy?
Freddy?
-[creaks]
-[thuds]
[suspenseful music]
[camera shutter clicks]
[Jeff] I got my finger stuck
in one of these things one time.
Isn't that funny?
[sighs]
Fucking cocksucker.
[whispering] Freddy?
Freddy?
Cakes!
What's wrong?
-Hey, change of plans.
-What are you talking about?
-He's got one, man.
-He's got one what?
He's got a kid in there.
-[camera shutter clicks]
-[Jeff] That's great.
[moans]
Fuck.
What do you wanna do, bud?
We gotta take care of it.
We gotta get him out.
Let's go.
Those even work?
Yeah, like a charm.
-All right.
-Yeah.
I thought I told you to
get rid of these masks
from the Baker job.
I like 'em.
-All right, if we got 'em,
let's use 'em.
-Mm-hmm.
Hey, no hanging around.
We get in. We get out.
Hey, it's a grab and bag.
All right?
Dibs on the big boy.
I bet you 20 bucks I can
rip out his fucking throat.
Let's hunt.
["Train Song"
by Federale]
[snorting]
[coughs]
[music continues]
-[humming]
-[phone rings]
Ho, ho, ho, ho.
Merry Christmas, Dad.
Merry almost. [sniffles]
No. Why are you calling me with
this shit on Christmas Eve?
I'm making cookies.
I made like
ten pounds of dough.
[sniffles] I'm gonna be--
I'm taking them to
the battered women's shelter.
I'm volunteering.
[power switches off]
[munching]
Um...
No, no, no, no.
Let me call you back.
Let me call you back.
The-- the power just
went out or something.
I don't know, the fucking oven
blew a fuse or something.
I'll call--
I'll call you back.
I'll get Mikey, hold on.
Okay, okay, okay.
Shut-- fuck.
Jesus Christ. [sniffles]
Mikey?
Mikey?
[sighs]
Mikey!
Mikey!
Mikey, Mikey, Mikey, Mikey.
You fucking asshole.
What the fuck is this?
Where's your fucking gun,
you fat fuck?
[animals howling]
What the fuck?
-[Christmas tune plays]
-Hello.
Well, I can see that you've
been very good this year.
I'll be sure to have
something special for you
in your stocking.
Ho, ho, ho.
Merry Christmas!
[suspenseful music playing]
[metal clanging]
[Jeff] Shit!
No, no, no.
Fucking stupid.
Fucking stupid, Mikey.
Stupid piece of shit.
Fuck. Fuck.
Fuck.
[panting]
Hi.
Merry Christmas.
[suspenseful music playing]
[panting]
My name is Jeff.
What's your name?
[neck cracks]
You wanna die on
Christmas Eve?
Motherfucker! Huh?
I'll crack your skull
like a fucking walnut.
Ah, shit!
I got you.
Come on. [growling]
-[Freddy growls]
-[gasps]
[thuds]
[punches landing]
[door clicks]
[munching]
[sighs]
[gags]
-What's up with you?
-Nothing, nothing.
-How's the kid?
-He's fine.
-Okay.
-Oh, cookies.
Don't.
Okay.
[door closes]
[car trunk creaks]
Hey, Jeff. Why don't you
get out of the car?
[thuds]
That's it.
Get out of the car,
you piece of shit.
How much money did you ask
my dad to pay you?
[laughs] Money?
We're not doing this for money.
[laughs]
[Lars] We don't really
give a fuck about money.
But you're gonna love
what we got prepared for you.
This is going to be awesome.
Come on.
[Jeff]
I'll go by myself.
Fuck you.
[grunts] Hey, hey.
[Lars] Come on.
It's gonna hurt if
you make this too hard.
-[Jeff groans]
-[Lars] Stay put.
Stay put!
Lift up your arms.
Lift them up.
Set 'em up!
We're going to play
the best game.
Possibly your last game
that you'll ever get to play.
[Jeff]
What the fuck is this?
[Lars]
Oh, you're about to see.
You can mess with
a couple of things,
but you can't fuck
with kids on Christmas.
It looks good.
What do you think?
-Okay, stay right there.
-[panting]
Do not move
or I'm gonna cut your neck.
You understand me?
You can't make me do this.
[Lars] I can.
Oh, you're doing it, boy.
Don't touch that pistol.
You understand me?
Don't touch that yet.
This is a real
cowboy night, boys.
Like a real
fucking Western, huh?
Whoo!
-Rules are simple.
-[Freddy exhales]
I want you to duel.
[western music]
[exhales]
[exhales]
All right.
You gun down Freddy Cakes,
you get to walk out of here,
no questions asked.
But if you jerk that pistol
before I tell you,
I will fucking end you,
you understand me?
Fuck me.
Great.
[sighs]
See, Cakes, this is what
I'm talking about.
[exhales]
[dramatic music]
-Now from this point--
-All right, let's go,
you fucking--
[gunshots]
Ah.
[exhales]
Whoo! Feather fly
like a turkey, baby!
Yeah!
Cakes, you a real
gunslinger now, man.
Ah...
Yeah, outlaws do make
the best cowboys.
Did you just make that up?
Nah, I heard it somewhere.
I love it.
How'd that handle?
-Real smooth.
-Yeah?
-How do you feel?
-[gun clicking]
As long as it's guys
like that, I'm in.
Done. Done.
You know what?
I think I'm gonna buy you
a steak this time.
-[Lars] Oh yeah?
-[Freddy] Yeah.
Sounds like a plan.
One second, though.
Excuse me.
[Jeff gags]
These are mine.
How fucking awesome are these?
[Freddy] Yeah, Valentine
really came through.
[Lars] Oh, this is by far
my favorite one.
Enjoy hell,
you son of a bitch.
[car door closes]
[Jeff choking]
[coughing]
-Fuck, dude, that was sick!
-My fucking heart is pumping.
That was so cool.
It's like when you fucking
did that-- fuck!
Oh. I forgot the kid
was in the car.
Don't scare him, man.
He's wearing your mask.
He scared me.
Hey, bud.
[Lars] You got a place where
we can drop you off?
Like a phone number,
an address, anything?
No? Great.
Well, let's just drop him
off at the hospital
and be done with it.
We're not gonna just
drop him off at the hospital.
Why the fuck not?
You just drive up,
kick him out of the car,
doctors and police,
they're all there.
He'd be great.
It's Christmas Eve,
come on.
What the fuck does that
have to do with anything?
What, are you Santa Claus now?
You gonna give him like
a fucking present?
You need some milk and cookies,
you piece of shit?
[stutters] Fuck you, man.
Maybe I do have
a present for him.
[Lars]
Where'd you get that?
Did you get that
from Lester's house?
I had to clean up
the crime scene.
-What's in it?
-I don't know.
-Let's check it out.
-[Lars] All right.
[chimes tinkling]
Huh.
[boy] What's that?
Nothing. It's nothing.
Nice present.
You ready to take
that mask off?
We got the bad guy.
You saw, right?
Yeah.
You can take it off now.
Here.
Boop. There you go.
Rarrr!
-[boy] Rarrr!
-[laughs] Cool kid, huh?
Yeah, adorable.
What are we gonna do with him?
Oh, I got the place.
Who can take care of a kid?
Oh, that's a good idea,
Cakes, good idea.
[car engine starts]
["Lifeline" by
Clarence Greenwood]
When you're so long gone
You can't help yourself
When you're so dead wrong
Let alone no one else
Well, the children
Still dying in the streets
And babies
Still living with disease
And the cops got guns,
And the poor folks got sons
Who work for Mr. Franklin
Every week
And if you've come
Looking for hard times
Hard times
Ain't hard to find
Because we've been
Given that lifeline
Only once in a lifetime
Baby, we was born
Maybe we were born
To be sure
To endure
When the storm comes
Got them sad eyes
Got them cat eyes
Got them angels tired
From saving
His life and you
Better to contain yourself
Before you end up killed
[humming]
Romans 3:8, okay.
[sniffles]
[chuckles]
[lighter flicks]
["Run, Man, Run"
by Federale]
[Bella]
Sometimes you gotta do bad
to do good.
[seagulls calling]
[whistling in song]
[vocalizing]
Run, run, run
Run, man,
Run, run, run, run
Run, man, run, run
[vocalizing]
[vocalizing]
Run, run, run
Run, man, run, run
Run, run
Run, man, run, run
Run, run
Run, man, run, run
Run, run
Run, man, run, run
[music fades]
-[waves crashing]
-[seagulls calling]