Fisherman's Friends: One and All (2022) Movie Script

1
(THE BONNIE SHIP
OF THE DIAMOND PLAYING)
MAN 1: (SINGING) The Diamond
is the ship, me boys
For the Davis Straits
we're bound
And the quay
it is all garnished
With bonnie lasses 'round
Cap'n Thompson
gives the orders
To sail the ocean wide
And we're bound for the land
where the sun don't set
Or darkness drear the sky
CHORUS: And it's cheer up,
me lads
Let your hearts never fail
For the Bonnie Ship
The Diamond's gone
fishing for the whale
Here's a health
to the Resolution
Likewise, the Eliza Swan
Here's a health
to the Battler of Montrose
And the Diamond, of our fame
We wears the trousers
of the white
The jackets of the blue
When we get home to Peterhead
We'll have sweethearts anew
ALL: And it's cheer up,
me lads
Let your hearts never fail
For the Bonnie Ship
-(WOMAN WHOOPS)
-The Diamond's gone fishing
For the whale
Hey!
-(CROWD CHEERING)
-(WOMEN WHOOPING)
(WHOOPS)
Thank you, Grimsby!
(CROWD CONTINUES CHEERING)
Thank you.
Thank you very much.
We are the
Fisherman's Friends.
-Yes, you are!
-MAN: Yes, we are.
You'll be relieved to know
that fame hasn't
changed us.
-No.
-(CROWD MURMURS)
No, we're still very happy
to play for common people
like you.
(CROWD EXCLAIMS)
(SCATTERED LAUGHTER)
We're going to hand over now
to Rowan here,
he's the housewife's
favourite.
(WOMEN CHEER)
Apparently, he's got a girl
in every port.
Yeah, yeah. Don't tell
his wife that, mind.
Or the only tackle he'll
have left is fishing tackle.
-(WOMEN CHEERING)
-(WOMAN WOLF-WHISTLES)
Oh, hello.
(MEN JEERING)
I told him that blondes
would have more fun!
-(CLUB MUSIC PLAYING)
-(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
(ALL LAUGHING)
MEN: (CHANTING) Down it!
Down it! Down it! Down it!
Down it! Down it!
Down it!
MEN: Aw!
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
(MAN 2 CHUCKLES)
Jim. Hi, um,
Gareth Brightwell.
Uh, A&R, Island Records.
Uh, we met at
the Cambridge Folk Festival.
We did?
Yeah, um...
Uh, when Leadville's
finished with his interview,
I was wondering
if you could have a word?
She is a really influential
music journalist.
I think I've done
enough talking
for one night, don't you?
(WOMEN CHEERING)
Yeah, well,
while I've got you,
Leah Jordan was just wondering
if you'd had any luck
finding a replacement singer.
Oh. Was she, now? Hmm?
No, no, it's just
I, um, yeah... We...
Well, the "label",
um, did notice that, um,
the band could...
could use an additional tenor.
What about...
I give you...
a tenner
to sod off and keep
your thoughts to yourself, eh?
JOURNALIST: You dirty old man!
-(WOMEN CHEER)
-How dare you?
(MEN EXCLAIMING)
Oh, my God!
What...
-What just happened?
-I don't know.
She was laughing
at all my jokes.
I thought I was in there.
Leadville, she is literally
paid to be nice to you.
What did you say?
All I said was,
does she like meat
in her pasty?
FISHERMEN'S FRIENDS:
(SINGING) For we sail
On the sloop John B
My grandpappy and me
Over the seven seas
we did roam
-Drinking all night
-Drinking all night
Got into a fight
-Well, I feel so broke up
-Oh, yeah
I wanna go home
-So hoist up the John B's sail
-Hoist up the John B's sail
-See how the mainsail sets
-See how the mainsail sets
Call for the captain ashore
Let me go home
I wanna go home
Let me go home
-And I wanna go home
-Hoist up the John B's sails
-Well, I feel so broke up
-Oh, yeah
I wanna go home
-I feel so broke up
-Oh, yeah
I want to go home
Oh, dear God.
Look at the sight of them.
I've seen dressed crabs
look more lively.
Oh, at least they're
all back safe, Mags.
MAGGIE: Apart from my son.
Looks like he's been swapped
for a stowaway.
Nice to see you too, Mother.
-Oh, my darling.
-(JIM KISSES)
-Oh, what? Aw!
-Hello, Granfer.
-Oh, love, I've missed you.
-(MAGGIE CHUCKLES)
Oh! What's all this, then?
Well, I thought
I'd try something different.
Hmm. As long as that's
the only experimenting
you've been doing.
What goes on tour
stays on tour, Sal.
No, don't listen to him.
No one's a patch on you, love.
JIM: Come on,
let's get up the hill.
Oh, I swear you've grown
over the last couple of weeks.
You carry on like this,
you're gonna be taller
than your mother
by the time she gets back.
We finally sorted out
the time zones last night.
-Oh.
-We spoke to them.
But they're okay.
And they're out to the Outback
at the end of the week.
Oh, well.
Mum said she's gonna
take some photos
of koala bears
and other endangered species.
Don't know why she had to go
halfway around the world
to do that.
She could have
just stayed here
and taken pictures
of Leadville.
(TAMSYN AND MAGGIE CHUCKLE)
(SEAGULLS CAWING)
Business still on the up, Sal?
Oh, booming.
Takings are up nearly 25%.
Danny must be pleased.
Man's sitting on a golden egg!
Hmm. What do you think's
paying for the honeymoon?
(MOBILE PHONE CHIMES)
Who's that?
Oh, it's... Uh, it's just Jim.
Wants me to pick him up
some fish bait.
No rest for the wicked.
Tamsyn seems in good spirits.
So would I be if I could still
swing my hips like that.
(MAGGIE AND JIM CHUCKLING)
The fan club's been inundated
with people
wanting to be the new
Fisherman's Friend.
No.
I don't need
any more friends, Mother.
Well, that's as may be.
But nine's an uneven number.
Doesn't sound right,
doesn't look right.
That's why your father wanted
to have ten in the band
in the first place.
You know my feelings
on the matter, Mother.
You're not the only one
who's hurting, son.
(KNOCKING AT DOOR)
Hi!
I was wondering
if it might be possible
to change to a different room?
Well, I'm afraid you've...
you've got the best room
in the house.
You know, superior double
with a sea view, as requested.
Yes, but I didn't request
the flock of seagulls
that keep waking me up at
five o'clock in the morning.
(LAUGHS)
General rule of thumb,
if you don't like seagulls,
don't come to the seaside.
General rule of thumb,
if you don't like guests,
don't run a B&B.
Oh, well, I do have
a small room at the back,
but I'm afraid
it doesn't come
with a Corby trouser press.
I think I can live
with a few creases.
Oh. That's very big of you.
I'll move me things.
What are you on, lad?
-What?
-She's a paying guest!
And a rude one.
No good morning, no thank you.
Who the hell
does she think she is?
-Miss Flynn!
-Hmm.
She's viewing properties
in the area, apparently.
Well, that's all we need,
isn't it?
Yeah, another
second homeowner.
If you're looking
for someone to blame,
you look no further
than yourself.
-Huh?
-It's your songs
that have made them
want a slice of our lives.
(HAUL AWAY JOE PLAYING)
JIM: (SINGING)
When I was just a little boy
Or so my mammy told me
Away, haul away
We'll haul away, Joe
Oh, if I never
kissed the girls
Me lips would grow a-mouldy
Away, haul away
We'll haul away, Joe
Away!
Haul away
We'll hope for better weather
Away, haul away
We'll haul away, Joe
I picked him
with a Yankee girl
JIM: (OVER SPEAKERS)
Around the corner, sonny
CHORUS: Away, haul away
We'll haul away, Joe
JIM: Oh, better I stayed
than made the grade
With the girls
from up our alley
Away, haul away
We'll haul away, Joe
-Away!
-(TURNS MUSIC OFF)
What'd you think?
They're just
so end of the pier.
Are you really telling me
that Keane, Mumford & Sons,
and Florence and the Machine
aren't ready
to deliver their new albums?
They're artists, Jez,
not Stock,
Aitken and Waterman.
They can't just
churn out hits.
Whereas,
the Fisherman's Friends
have a new album
just sitting there.
And ready to roll.
We can plug the hole
in quarter four
and build on the momentum
of their national tour.
As president of this label,
I have a duty of care to
protect its reputation, and...
Moby Dick and the Whalers
are definitely not on message.
Look, I know they're
a bit rough around the edges,
but it's all part
of their old-school charm.
Old-school?
They're prehistoric, Leah!
Nobody tries to shag the
female journalist any more.
I get it.
They're struggling a bit
since Danny Anderson
hung up his boots.
-I'll have a word.
-That's not your job.
My team can handle it.
Fine.
Listen. I can just about
tolerate them
singing songs from 1792
as long as they don't act
like they're
from the same era.
I'll be sure we drag them
into the 21st century.
(DOOR OPENS)
AUTOMATED VOICE: Please record
your name and press hash.
Leadville Trebilcock.
(KEYPAD BEEPS)
You will now be placed
into the conference.
You are the first participant
in the conference.
(WHIMSICAL MUSIC PLAYING)
(GRUNTING SOFTLY)
(BREATHES DEEPLY)
Come on, man.
Think of the ocean.
AUTOMATED VOICE: Please record
your name and press hash.
Oh. (MUTTERS) Jim!
(KEYPAD BEEPS)
You will now be placed
into the conference.
You are the tenth participant
in the conference.
Okay, is everyone on?
Yeah. We're, uh... We're still
waiting for Leadville,
I think.
Can we just start without him?
Otherwise we'll be here
forever.
Okay. This is
Leah Jordan speaking.
Managing Director
of Island Records.
-We met when you...
-(SNIFFS) Ugh!
...gate-crashed my offices
in London last year.
Yeah. Yeah, I remember.
LEAH: I'll cut straight
to the chase.
The music industry graveyard
is littered
with one-hit wonders.
It's called the curse of the
-second album, and it's real.
-(BABY COOING)
Talking of curses,
I am dealing
with a poo-nami here.
-What?
-(BABY CRYING OVER SPEAKER)
Um, what?
Ugh, I'm sorry, but Cameron's
got the runny tummy again.
(OVER SPEAKER)
Um, you were saying?
-What the flip?
-Uh...
We'd like to release
your next album,
but we have concerns.
Oh, yeah? And what
might those be, then?
You can't continue acting
like social hand grenades.
Any negative publicity doesn't
just reflect badly on you,
it reflects badly
on the whole label.
With success
comes responsibility.
Understood.
We'll mind our P's and Q's.
-(EXHALING)
-(URINATING)
(URINATING OVER SPEAKER)
Huh?
Mmm...
(CONTINUES URINATING)
There she blows.
(LEADVILLE WHISTLING
DRUNKEN SAILOR OVER SPEAKER)
(GASPS)
-(WOMAN LAUGHS)
-MAN 1: Oh, my God.
(CONTINUES URINATING
OVER SPEAKER)
(LEADVILLE CONTINUES
WHISTLING OVER SPEAKER)
-(URINATING STOPS)
(WHISTLING STOPS)
Hello.
(OVER SPEAKER) Anyone there?
JIM: Yeah,
we're all here, Leadville.
Just waiting for you
to flush, mate.
(OVER RECORDING)
Leadville Trebilcock...
AUTOMATED VOICE:
...has left the conference.
-(MAN EXCLAIMS)
-(LINE BEEPS)
JIM: (GRUNTING) I don't think
I'm bloody cut out
for all of this.
JAGO: Cut out for what?
All that
being in the spotlight lark.
(CHUCKLES)
End of tour blues is all.
Oh, it's not just that.
I'm just not sure I wanna be
singing any more.
I don't think life's got...
any easier with all this fuss.
No, it's just got more bloody
complicated, innit?
Why don't you talk
to the boys, huh?
I'm talking to you, aren't I?
(LAUGHING) Don't you go
telling too many people.
They'll have you
in a strait-jacket
-before you can say...
-"Stargazy pie."
"Stargazy pie."
(SENTIMENTAL MUSIC PLAYING)
Oh, God.
Oh, I miss you, Father.
(SINGING) No more, I'm through
All my little life
I've been searching
for the door
Trying to put
my finger on it...
Um, you wanted to see me?
-Relax. It's not your P45.
-(SIGHS IN RELIEF)
It's a return ticket
on the Stella Express.
The, uh, Stella what?
The overnight train
from Paddington to Penzance.
Cornwall?
Oh, mate, if it means spending
any more time with those men,
I honestly think
I prefer redundancy.
Gareth, you may not be able
to grow a beard,
but if you're gonna make it
in this industry,
you are gonna
have to grow some balls.
Yes, of course. (CHUCKLES)
Uh, what is it?
Media training.
WOMAN: Okay.
Well, um, thank you all
for being here. Um...
Let's start with a volunteer.
Um...
This is a safe space,
who would...
who would like to go first?
Maybe share any...
Anything.
Okay.
My name
IS Leadville Trebilcock.
And I'm politically incorrect.
Right, welcome,
Lead... Leadville.
(SCATTERED APPLAUSE)
Now, admitting
you have a problem
is the first
and most important step
in your journey of recovery.
Let's explore the incident
you had with a female
journalist in Grimsby.
(CHUCKLES SOFTLY)
Well, to be perfectly honest,
I'd had a few jars,
so I can't actually remember
what happened, my darlin'.
Oh, can I just stop you there?
Uh, referring to me,
or indeed, any woman
as "my darling"
is inappropriate.
But it's just
a term of affection, innit?
It's also a term
that represents
centuries of male oppression.
How about "my fair maid'?
Why would you assume that
because I'm a woman
I must be a domestic servant?
No, no, no, no.
He... He means "maid"
as in "maiden". You know?
Well, that's even worse.
You don't know if I'm married
or if I've ever had
sexual intercourse.
(MEN CLEAR THROAT)
So, how should we address you?
Why don't you try using...
using my name?
All right, Pet...
ra.
Can I... Should...
Should we...
Should we get back to basics?
Yeah.
Yeah, okay. Um...
Let's try some neurolinguistic
programming.
Update the way you speak
and think.
Nope. Bugger this.
-PETRA: Um...
-Ooh, no.
-Jim, where are you going?
-I have got pots
that need pulling.
And, no,
that is not a euphemism.
(MEN CHUCKLE)
Um, yeah. Jim, so...
Sorry. Jim?
Just a quick word?
PETRA: Um, everyone,
if we all just
shut our eyes for a second
and just stroke the top
of your forehead.
A little bit.
Just take that tension out.
Everyone. Okay, brilliant.
JIM: Well, what did
they expect, eh?
(STUTTERS) When they signed
ten proud singing fishermen?
(SCOFFS) We speak this way
'cause we're Cornish.
Not 'cause we're part of
some patriarchal conspiracy.
(DOORBELL RINGS)
I'll get it!
JIM: Right, my love!
Thank you.
(SCOFFING)
And now they want to stop us
using local terms
of endearment and all.
If I ever do that,
I may as well
stop eating pasties,
drinking Tribute,
and waving the flag
of St Piran.
Yeah, I know what you mean,
son, but... (CHUCKLES)
A little awareness
of what other people
might find offensive is...
(TUTS)
Well, it can't do no harm,
can it?
Hmm, well...
What?
Well, I know that we all have
our signature crimping style,
but...
it's a crime not to brush
our pastry with egg wash.
That's 'cause I ain't
finished yet, have 1?
There's a music journalist
at the door.
Why can they not just respect
my bloody privacy, eh?
He doesn't want
to speak to you, Granfer.
He wants to speak
to Aubrey Flynn.
Huh?
(SEAGULLS CAWING)
-(JIM SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY)
-Thank you.
Is it only me
that finds it ironic?
That I'm paying you
for selling me out.
I'm sorry,
I don't know what you mean.
If you wanted
a celebrity endorsement,
you could've just asked me
for a signed photograph,
and stuck that up
on your wall.
Oh, I'm very sorry, miss.
(STUTTERS) We haven't got
the faintest idea who you are.
ROWAN: She's an Irish singer.
She had a couple of hits
in the late '90s.
-Oh, is that right, is it?
-ROWAN: Yeah.
Yeah, Sal and I,
we danced to one of them
at our wedding.
Oh, to be honest,
I don't remember much
out of my best man's speech.
Yeah, probably for the best.
Cousin Pascoe's wife's
brother-in-law's
auntie's daughter...
-What? Morwenna?
-That's the one.
She says she's been asking
about properties to rent.
Oh, yeah?
Probably to get away
from prying eyes.
I did a bit of Googling.
She got a reputation as being
a bit of a hell raiser.
Makes Stevie Nicks
-look like Shirley Temple.
-Oh.
Huh.
She's not the only one.
(PLEASANT MUSIC PLAYING)
(MEN VOCALISING)
Right. Tony.
Come in here, my dear.
Just go in there,
sit down anywhere you like.
Could put a glass eye
to sleep, that one.
Granfer! Have you
seen the queue?
-(ALL VOCALISING INDISTINCTLY)
-(SINGING) White stockings
White stockings, she wore
We've got nearly
a hundred hopefuls.
-Oh.
-But don't worry, my son.
No one's gonna be
stepping in anyone's shoes.
Good. 'Cause they're
too big to fill.
-This just doesn't feel right.
-Huh?
(ALL CONTINUE
SINGING INDISTINCTLY)
Why's there
no women auditioning?
Leadville, I think the clue
is in the name. "Fisherman"?
We don't wanna be accused
of sexual discrimination.
Eh?
Ever since our media training,
he thinks he's become
a feminist, see?
(LAUGHS)
Word of advice, my darling.
You gotta be able
to fill a bra
before you can burn one.
Come on.
Let's get this over with.
Right! Let's be having you.
Hello. What are you going
to sing for us today?
Sailing.
Rod the Mod's had
a bit of a makeover.
(SINGING) I am sailing
I am sailing!
GARETH: Ooh.
Home again!
Across the sea
I am sailing
(SOFTLY) Wailing, more like.
(SINGING) Crying cockles
and mussels alive, alive, oh!
Alive, alive-o!
Alive, alive-o!
Crying cockles and mussels,
alive, alive-o!
(SINGING) In the Navy, come on
Protect the Motherland
In the Navy, come on now
Join your fellow man!
In the Navy
Come on, girls
Give yourself a hand!
In the Navy
I said, they want you
They want you
They want you as a new recruit
They want you! They want you!
They want you
as a new recruit!
-No, we bloody don't.
-(SNICKERS)
(SINGING) For...
-I am a pirate king
-(MOUTHING ALONG)
Hurrah for the pirate king
And it is, it is
a glorious thing
-To be a pirate king
-(SINGING ALONG)
I am the pirate king!
-(CLEARS THROAT)
-And it is, it is
A glorious thing
to be a pirate king
Hurrah for the pirate king!
Hurrah for the pirate
King!
-I think he should abdicate.
-(CHUCKLES)
All right, uh, my name is,
uh, Morgan Jenkins.
Well, that's a lovely lilt
you've got there, Morgan.
Where you come from?
West Wales, a small town
called Llangrannog.
Try saying
that when you're pissed.
Try saying it
when you're sober.
(MEN LAUGH)
What will you be singing
for us today, Mr Jenkins?
Well, a song
that I know you all know.
Uh, it's a favourite shanty
of mine.
Santiana.
(LAUGHS)
In your own time, me 'and some.
(SINGING)
O! Santiana won the day
Heave away, Santiana
He won the day down
in Monte Del Rey
All along the plains of Mexico
Heave her up and away we'll go
Heave away, Santiana
(SINGING)
Heave her up and away we'll go
All along the plains of Mexico
Oh, Santiana fought for gold
Heave away, Santiana
What deeds he did
have oft been told
All along the plains of Mexico
Heave her up and away we'll go
-Heave away, Santiana
-(ALL SINGING ALONG)
Heave her up and away we'll go
All along the plains of Mexico
Where's that
golden button? (CHUCKLES)
Buzzer.
Ah.
Golden buzzer, Mother.
(IN CORNISH)
(EXCLAIMS IN CORNISH)
You speak Cornish?
When I moved down, I thought
I'd pick up a dictionary
and learn a word or two.
Well, it looks like you've
done a lot more than that.
Well, to be fair,
Cornish is a close cousin
to my mother tongue,
So, it's probably the reason
why I feel so at home here.
Would you be able
to take time off work
to fulfil touring, recording,
and promotional activities?
You bet I would. (CHUCKLES)
Absolutely, yeah!
I'm my own boss.
(RINGING TONE)
(MOBILE PHONE RINGING)
-Ooh!
-(MOBILE PHONE BEEPS)
Hi, Leah.
Gareth, where've you been?
Just doing some work.
Yeah. On the harbour wall
getting some, um, service.
Uh, right. Look.
I've watched
Morgan's audition.
He seems the perfect fit.
Great! Okay, great, yeah!
I'll let them know. (CHUCKLES)
Oh, Christ.
What?
The tide.
(LINE DISCONNECTS)
(LAUGHS)
Shit.
Well, one thing to sing
for us all in a church.
WOMAN: You all right?
Quite another to sing
for a bunch of rowdy fans
out on the Platt.
Didn't look like the sort
who would get stage fright.
No. My feeling is that the man
is going to be
out of his depth.
ROWAN: He's not the only one.
-Eh?
-(LAUGHING)
Have a look at this.
JIM: What's up?
(MEN LAUGHING)
(EXHALING SHARPLY)
Oi! Gareth!
Huh? Ah.
Shark!
(PEOPLE LAUGHING)
Good one!
Leah Jordan absolutely
loved Morgan's audition clip.
She thinks he'll be
a real asset to the band.
Oh, well, she does, does she?
She also said Kenny's Seafood
have been in touch.
They were just wondering
if you'd be interested in
being the face
of their new fish product.
They Cornish fish, are they?
(LAUGHS)
What? I didn't realise
fish had nationalities.
Of course they do.
How can you tell?
They have Cornish accents,
innum?
(MEN SNICKER AND LAUGH)
Oh, give him a chance,
he's such fun!
Sorry.
Yeah, the label thought
it would be
a good marketing opportunity
to sort of cross-publicise
with the album launch.
Any money in it for us?
Yeah, a couple
of thousand each.
What do we have to do for it?
Uh, Leah said something about
dressing up as fishmongers.
Oh. No.
(FOLK MUSIC PLAYING)
FISHERMAN'S FRIENDS: (SINGING)
You will have a fishy
On a little dishy
You will have a fishy
when the boat comes in
You will have a fishy
on a little dishy
You will have a fishy
when the boat comes in
Dance to your daddy
Sing to your mommy
Dance to your daddy
My bonnie lad
Dance to your daddy
Sing to your mommy
Dance to your daddy
My bonnie lad
You will have a fish
You will have a fin
You will have a mackerel
When the boat comes in
(OVER SPEAKERS)
You will have a fish
You will have a fin
You will have a mackerel
when the boat comes in
I'm losing it! I'm losing it!
I'm losing it!
Oi, oi, oi, oi, oi!
-Cut! Cut!
-(MAN CHUCKLES)
-(MEN EXCLAIM)
-Come on, what's going on?
GARETH: It's all right.
I've got it.
MORGAN: Horsey, whoa!
(LAUGHS)
This is bloody ridiculous!
How you supposed to serve fish
dressed like this?
Yeah, sorry, lads,
I must have
misheard the creative brief.
Well, there is a world
of difference, isn't there,
between a fishmonger
and a fish finger?
What the bloody hell
are you doing here, anyway?
He isn't even officially
a part of the band yet.
(STUTTERS) Leah thought he
might add some sex appeal.
And since when a fish finger's
been sexy?
-(GROUP LAUGHS)
LEADVILLE: Yeah.
GARETH: Sorry, mm...
MORGAN: Look at him...
You never were
the sharpest tool in the shed,
but I didn't think
you'd be this dumb!
-What are you talking about?
-You don't realise
you left your phone
in the pub?
Yeah. This popped up
from some slapper
in Grimsby flashing her assets
wanting to pick up
where you left off.
No, no, it was just a hen-do.
Oh, yeah, and what were you?
One more fling
before the ring?
No, nothing happened, Sal,
I promise.
Don't bother coming home
tonight. You're barred.
Sal? Sal!
-The ring, don't kick it.
-LEADVILLE: Over there!
-The flipper.
-Sal!
-Flip it on the flipper.
-I can't!
(LEADVILLE, ROWAN AND MORGAN
CHATTERING INDISTINCTLY)
Um, the director would like
to do one more take.
If he hasn't got it after 25,
then perhaps he should get
a different job, eh?
Yeah, um, okay.
Well, there's quite
a lot at stake here, Jim.
Yeah. Yeah, there is.
Families, and friendship.
And none of this is helping.
ROWAN: Put it on the thing.
Put it on the flipper.
-I'll get it. I'll get it.
-Get your flipper away!
(ROWAN, LEADVILLE AND MORGAN
CHATTERING INDISTINCTLY)
ROWAN: Get your flipper
out of the way.
(MEN ARGUING)
Right, okay, um...
Well, enjoy the view,
Miss Flynn.
This is one of
our most popular rentals.
Cheers.
What? Oh, God! Sorry. (GROANS)
Oh, The Folly, eh?
Oh, gonna be right up
your street, ain't it?
I'm sorry?
Oh, yeah, hasn't he told you?
The place was built as
a den of debauchery
some 200 years ago, so...
So?
Drinking, orgies, opium...
That was
just the tea parties, so...
I don't know
what you're getting at.
Don't listen to him,
Miss Flynn.
It's all just
old wives' tales.
Oh, he'll say anything
for a sale, he will.
Oh, I don't know
how you sleep at night, Logan.
Pricing locals out of the
housing market and whatnot?
Hey, I have known you
since you were a lad.
Where is your integrity?
Integrity, eh? Well,
you are a fine one to talk.
BOY: Excuse me?
Can I have your autograph,
please?
(SIGHS) Yes, but you should be
asking her for hers,
'cause she's the famous one
around here.
Apparently.
It was a mutiny!
There was nothing I could do!
They're a bunch
of ageing fisherman,
not Pirates of the Caribbean.
(SCOFFS) Yeah, well, okay.
Give me Blackbeard any day.
No, I can't do this any more,
Leah!
I literally cannot function
outside the M25!
Oh, stop being such a melt.
How hard can it be?
(LINE DISCONNECTS)
Gareth? Hello?
(SIGHS)
I only agreed to this
because you said you were
personally going
to take charge.
I thought he could handle it.
Time to pack
your bucket and spade.
(SIGHS)
(LEADVILLE SNORING)
Ugh! Will you get your cloven
hoof out of my face!
You can talk!
Hogging the duvet all night.
I'm surprised you need one
with all that bloody hot air
you've been leaking.
At least I didn't try
to spoon you.
(SIGHS) I thought I was
back in bed with Sal.
(SAIL AWAY LADIES PLAYING)
Ain't no use to sit and cry
Sail away, lady, sail away
You'll be an angel by and by
Sail away, lady, sail away
Don't you rock
Don't you rock on
Don't you rock on, my daddy
Don't you rock on, daddy-oh
(FOLK MUSIC PLAYING)
Afternoon, Jim.
Maggie said I'd find you here.
Oh, hello.
Head of the record label
risking getting her shoes
dirty?
Must be important.
Playing the Minack Theatre
in front of the national press
is about as important
as it gets.
What? You got us a booking
at the Minack?
Oh. Proper job.
I'm here to make sure
you're all on message
for the press junket.
Yeah? Whose message
might that be, then?
Yours or ours?
Same thing, Jim.
You ever done a junket before?
No.
Well, all you gotta do is grip
and grin.
Sounds like
a prostate examination.
Similar. Only more probing.
JOURNALIST: Tom Roberts.
What's it like
sharing a record label
with Lady Gaga?
Well, according
to our management,
she's well chuffed.
(ALL LAUGH)
David White,
BBC Radio Cornwall.
Now, lots of people say that
-you're just a novelty act.
-Oh?
But it looks
like you're here to stay,
so, what's
the secret ingredient?
Musical integrity.
Oggy, oggy, oggy!
GROUP: (CHANTS) Oi, I, oi!
ROWAN: Oggy!
GROUP: Oi!
-Oggy!
-GROUP: Oi!
ROWAN: Oggy, oggy, oggy!
GROUP: (CHANTS) Oi, oi, oi!
Karthi Gnanasegaram.
What's it like to
welcome a new member
to the band?
Morgan Jenkins, like us,
is a proud Celt
with a fine voice
who also risks his life
volunteering for the RNLI.
Are you a fisherman
by trade, too, Mr Jenkins?
Uh, no. I'm a farmer.
(GAGS AND SPUTTERS)
-(SOFTLY) Christ, here we go.
-(PEOPLE CHATTERING EXCITEDLY)
Not now, Jimmy.
-What? Did you know?
-I thought everybody did.
Grip and grin, Jim.
Um, that's enough questions.
-Thank you.
-(EXCITED CHATTER CONTINUES)
If you could just make
your way to the theatre,
you can take your seats.
ANNOUNCER: (OVER SPEAKERS)
This evening's performance
by the Fisherman's Friends
will begin
in approximately 15 minutes.
Will you please
take your seats?
MAGGIE: Come on, son.
Get over yourself.
Look where you are.
You're singing in one of the
best venues in the country.
Well, I am as open-minded
as the next man, Mother,
as you well know.
But you've gotta draw a line
in the sand somewhere,
ain't you?
Bad enough being told
what we can
and can't catch out there
but blokes like him,
he's been given subsidies
not to farm.
Right now, Father would be
spinning in his grave.
No, son. You are wrong there.
Jago was a man of the people.
Some of his oldest friends
worked the land.
(GRUMBLES)
And you can pack
that whisky in, and all.
I... I have had it way up
to here with your fussing!
ALL: She sells seashells
on the seashore.
The shells she sells
are surely...
He sells seashells!
"She", Leadville.
It's not "he".
That's the sort of
gender stereotyping
that's fuelled centuries
of female oppression.
(MEN LAUGH)
Why should we assume
it's a woman peddling
her wares?
Cheers.
-What's that say?
-Uh, it's a song list.
No, no, this.
Him opening with Little Lize?
That ain't happening.
-Why not?
-'Cause it ain't!
The audience like it,
and Morgan knows it.
Yeah, the boys thought
it'd be a good idea
to start
with something upbeat.
Put a smile on people's faces.
Oh, I ain't smiling, am I?
No, if there's gonna be
any changes,
it's gotta be put
to a vote, ain't it?
We already voted, Jim.
But you decided
that getting another drink
was more important
than having a say.
Little Lize was the first song
my father ever taught me.
Now lose it.
-(EXHALES)
-MORGAN: What was that about?
(AUDIENCE APPLAUDING
AND CHEERING)
Hey, alright?
We're Port Isaac's
Fisherman's Friends.
If the salty smell of the sea
has been overpowered by the...
by the rotten stench
of manure,
well, that's because the band
have asked
a muck-spreader
to join us here today.
Steady on, Jim.
Our first song is
A Sailor ain't a Sailor.
And ladies and gentlemen,
please give a hearty welcome
to our newest member
of the band, Morgan Jenkins.
-(ALL APPLAUDING AND CHEERING)
-(WHOOPS)
(SINGING) My father
often told me
When I was just a lad
-(FINGERS SNAP)
-The Sailor's life
Is very hard
The food was always bad
But now I've joined the Navy
aboard a Man-o-war
And now I find a sailor
ain't a sailor any more
ALL: Don't haul
on the ropes
Don't climb up the mast
If you see a sailing ship
It might be your last
(ALL EXCLAIM)
Get your civvies ready
for another run ashore
A sailor ain't a sailor
Ain't a sailor any more
The killick of our mess
-He says we've had it soft
-(FINGERS SNAP)
It wasn't like this in his day
When he was up aloft
We like our bunks
and sleeping bags
But what's a hammock for?
Swinging from the deck head
Or lying on the floor?
ALL: Don't haul
on the ropes
Don't climb up the mast
If you see a sailing ship,
it might be your last
(MEN EXCLAIM)
Get your civvies ready
for another run ashore
A sailor ain't a sailor
Ain't a sailor any more
Don't haul on the ropes
Don't climb up the mast
If you see a sailing ship,
it might be your last
Get your civvies ready
for another run ashore
A sailor ain't a sailor
Ain't a sailor any more
(AUDIENCE APPLAUDING
AND CHEERING)
Ah. Thank you. Thank you.
There we are,
our nine Fisherman's Friends
-and one sheep shagger!
-(AUDIENCE BOOS)
MAN 1: Get on with it.
WOMAN 1: Come on.
Ladies and gentlemen,
our next song
is Drunken Sailor!
Oh, go and put a sock in it
Germaine Greer,
I'm gonna decide
what we sing next.
(AUDIENCE BOOING)
-Here we go, lads.
-MAN 1: Get on with it!
MAN 2: Come on!
(AUDIENCE JEERING)
WOMAN 2: I want a refund!
WOMAN: (ON RECORDING)
I am strong.
I can make a difference.
I am strong.
I can make a difference.
WOMAN: Today I will succeed.
Today I will succeed.
WOMAN: You are not a victim.
Hey! Hi. Uh...
Um, sorry. Just, um...
WOMAN: You are not a victim.
Just going through
new artist submissions.
Mindfulness tapes,
a growing market. Huge.
WOMAN: You are not a victim.
(SHUSHES) That's better.
I'm trying to make contact
with Leah.
Any update from Cornwall?
Uh, well, no news
is good news, Jez... Boss.
Jim! Jim? Jim, you're ruining
this for everyone!
-Jim! Come on!
-Get off of me!
Come on, Jim! What happened
to "one and all"?
One and all, my arse!
Ever since
we made the top ten,
it's been every bugger
for himself around here!
Why don't you
just take it easy, Jim?
If you've got a problem
with me,
we can take it somewhere else.
Oh, sod that!
Let's have it out right here,
shall we? Eh?
All right, back off!
Hey, if you touch me
one more time,
I'm gonna punch you
so bloody hard,
you're gonna be spittin' teeth
for a bloody week!
-Jim!
-Yeah, what do you want?
What the hell is going on?
Well, why don't you ask him?
-You need to calm down!
-Oh, yeah!
Take a time out,
you're back on in ten minutes.
No. I'm not going on anywhere.
I've had enough of this crap.
No, I quit!
LEAH: Jim.
Jim!
(ROWAN SIGHS)
ROWAN: Any sign of him?
(SIGHS) Looked everywhere.
See, this wouldn't
have happened
if I hadn't have
joined the band.
Don't be daft, Morgan.
If anybody's to blame,
it's Jim.
I'm sorry, I know he's going
through a tough time
right now,
but he's not
the only one struggling.
Not as simple as that, Rowan.
You know that.
Look, this doesn't
sit right with me.
You lot have been friends
since you were
in short trousers.
And me being here is gonna
get in the way
of you boys
patching things up, so...
I reckon I should just
leave you to it.
-No, Morgan.
-No.
-Come on, man.
-Listen, listen.
I've had the best time
singing with you boys.
But this is bigger than that.
(SEAGULL CAWING)
(SOFT MUSIC PLAYING)
You made a right fool
of yourself out there.
Oh, the whole
bloody situation
has made bloody fools
out of everyone, ain't it?
All I want is for things to go
back to how they were before.
Change is inevitable, boy.
And in my experience,
it often brings
something good
if you embrace it.
Ain't nothing good coming out
of this for anyone.
No, far as I can see,
they're all just blinded by
the bloody lights, that's all.
What?
'Tis so much better sitting
by yourself in the dark.
Well, better that
than being surrounded
by people...
and feeling lonelier
than you ever have before.
Leadville?
Come on, wake up!
Wake up, you lazy so and so.
Morning, Maggie.
You made the papers.
On a scale of one to ten,
how bad is it?
Eleven.
"Fisherman's Friends
leave a sour taste."
"Shanty band
sink to new depths."
"Cornish crooners
walk the plank."
"Fans left gutted.
What'd The Daily Mail say?
(SIGHS)
"Hook, line and stinker."
No wonder Jim's laying low.
The least he could do is
look us all in the eye
and say sorry.
Well, I have never
seen him so down.
I don't know what to do to
get through to him any more.
JIM: (SINGING)
Pass around the grog, me boys
Never mind the storm
Drink the good old liquor down
Until we call for more
Sing, sing...
(AUBREY PANTING)
Well, that was steeper
than it looked on the map.
Yeah. Yeah.
-But worth it for this view.
-Yeah.
Yeah, it is.
That was some performance
you did yesterday.
Well, isn't that what
lead singers are meant to do?
Put on a show,
create a bit of a scandal.
(CHUCKLES SOFTLY)
I've definitely done some
crazy things in my time, too.
-Oh, yeah.
-Yeah.
Not quite the full
Ozzy Osbourne biting
the head off a bat
or anything, but...
Definitely stuff I regret.
Well, I don't mean to be rude,
but I'm up here
'cause I want to be alone.
Mm-hmm.
I get that.
Cheers.
Hey?
If you ever wanna chat
with somebody,
you know where I'm staying.
JIM: (ON VIDEO) Well, we're
nine Fisherman's Friends
and one sheep shagger.
LEADVILLE: And our next song
is Drunken Sailor!
JIM: Put a bloody sock in it,
will you, Germaine Greer?
JEZ: Seriously?
JIM: I'm gonna decide
what we sing next.
(SIGHS)
Yeah, Leah? It's Jez.
Time to cut them loose.
LEAH: There's no easy way
to say this.
The president of the label has
decided to drop the band.
(SIGHS) What about the album?
We can't release something
we don't represent.
There must be something
you can do.
These are hands, Rowan,
not magic wands.
So that's it, then?
Our day in the sun is over?
Some bands
don't even get there.
This isn't just any old album,
Leah, you know.
Jago sings on
a couple of the tracks,
it's dedicated to his memory.
I'm sensitive
to the situation, Maggie.
But for the label,
it's strictly business.
Well, it might be business
to you, my dear,
but it's personal to me.
Jago has a chance
to live on through song.
I'm sorry, Maggie.
I really am.
But this comes from the top.
There's nothing I can do.
(FOLK MUSIC PLAYING)
FISHERMAN'S FRIENDS: (SINGING)
Stormy's only got one eye
Blow, Captain Stormio
He'll always find you
by and by
Blow, Captain Stormio
Stormy's roarin' round the bay
Stamp and go and heave away
Stormy's here
but he can't stay
Sailors stay in port today
Stormy's watchin' with his eye
Let him pass and blow on by
He's a-lookin' at you
from the sky
Blow, Captain Stormio
Nowhere to run,
nowhere to hide
Blow, Captain Stormio
Stormy's watchin' with his eye
Let him pass and blow on by
Let him pass and blow on by
Let him pass and blow on by
(BIRDS SQUAWKING)
WOMAN: Fame is a fickle thing
that can vanish
in the blink of an eye.
Something that
notorious Irish singer
Aubrey Flynn found out
when she had a major meltdown
and turned on her fans.
Maybe you can blame
a failed album
and the pressures
of a national tour,
but throw in plenty
of alcohol, live TV
and you've got a recipe
for disaster.
AUBREY: I don't care!
-MAN: Boo!
-Up yours!
(CROWD SHOUTING INDISTINCTLY)
AUBREY: Kiss my arse!
MAN: Boo!
-(CROWD SHOUTING INDISTINCTLY)
-Get me out of here!
(AUBREY PLAYING GUITAR)
AUBREY: (SINGING)
Sorry for everything
There's a hundred roads
That I've already travelled
Got a story, ooh...
(HUMMING)
(SHE CONTINUES PLAYING GUITAR)
Baby, got to write
An ending
No!
(MUMBLING)
Are you lost?
-Eh?
-Are you lost?
No!
No, I was just checking
the condition
of the stiles and fences
along the coastal path.
Must be
a love-hate relationship.
What's that?
You and farmers?
Oh, no, no. Enough of them
buggers. No, no, no.
It was for
the lifeboat service.
More work for them if someone
takes a tumble down a cliff,
that's all.
Mm.
While you're up here,
do you fancy a cuppa?
(HESITATES) Yeah.
Yeah, all right.
(STUTTERS)
I don't suppose you got
anything stronger, have you?
I could add an extra tea bag.
Huh.
(SOFT MUSIC PLAYING)
(JIM SIGHS)
Oh, thank you.
(STUTTERS)
Now that I'm up here, um...
I'd like to apologise for...
for being grouchy with you
since you arrived in town.
I've not been
feeling myself of late.
I appreciate that.
I've... I've been told you...
you've packed in the drinking,
is that right?
I haven't had a drink
in 1,047 days.
-Mm. Yeah. Yeah.
-Ah. (CHUCKLES)
Sounds repetitive.
Each one's a victory.
Yeah, I like a...
pint or two myself,
I can stop whenever I like.
I used to say that.
And then I realised
I'd rather live my life sober
and consider myself
an alcoholic than
live my life drunk
and try and convince myself
that I'm not.
Yeah.
(SNIFFS)
AUBREY: I can't ever imagine
getting tired of this view.
JIM: Yeah.
Sometimes she's got
a nasty habit of
letting you know
how insignificant you are.
I don't need reminding
of that.
Hm.
You feel it even more
when you're out there, mind.
I tell you what...
I'll let you know
next time I'm going out.
Maybe tag along?
If you fancy.
Hm.
(GROANS)
What have you done
to your hair?
You look like Kermit the Frog!
Trying to get back
to my natural colour.
Where's your bloody
washing machine?
We haven't got one.
If you wanna wash
your grundies,
you're gonna have to do it
the old-fashioned way.
Hot water, soap,
plenty of elbow grease.
(SIGHS)
You'll have to wash
the dishes first, mind.
(ROWAN SIGHS)
Right. I'm off to liberate
a brown trout.
-(SIGHS)
-(PHONE RINGING)
-Rowan speaking.
-It's me.
Is everything all right?
Is Kenwyn okay?
He's fine.
I spoke to that girl
from Grimsby.
She said she took advantage
of you being so hammered
and hassled you into
giving her your number.
I'm so, so sorry, Sal.
I've been a right fool.
But... (SIGHS)
Listen, if we're gonna
get past this then
I need to be totally honest
with you, all right?
I kind of enjoyed
the attention.
Made me feel wanted again.
What do you mean "wanted"?
Since we've had Kenwyn,
you've barely looked my way
or laid a finger on me.
It's not that
I don't want you any more.
It's just... I don't have
any time to be me.
I'm either a mom
or a landlady or a housewife.
None of those things
make me feel very attractive.
Got ourselves into
a right muddle, didn't we?
-(CHUCKLES)
-I swear on Kenwyn's life
that I will never look at
another woman ever again.
(SCOFFS) Fat lot of good
you're gonna be
behind the bar.
Ker-ching!
(HUMMING)
What are you so
cock-a-hoop about?
Sally's taking me back.
Thank God for that.
So if it took Mum and Danny
23 hours to fly to Sydney...
-JIM: Yeah?
-...how long would it
have taken
great-great-great-
great-Uncle Jack
to sail there?
Hm, four months he was at sea.
Along with some of the best
tenors in the county.
All lookin'
to make their fortunes
in the great copper mines of
South Australia, they were.
-Did he become rich?
-Uh, no.
No, but he did find happiness.
Yeah.
He found and married his
true love out there, he did.
Aw.
As it happens, turns out
she were born in Padstow.
(CHUCKLING)
A man can't have it all
though, can he, eh?
Can we go and visit
the old tin mine
you used to work near here?
Yeah, maybe next week.
But I wanna get on with
my school history project
on it.
Yeah, well, I'm a bit busy
this week, Tam.
Monday, after school.
Make that a date, eh?
I've got to get this lot off,
so I'll see you later,
my darlin'.
(CAR DOOR CLOSES)
(ENGINE STARTS)
(PLEASANT MUSIC PLAYING)
(SEAGULLS CAWING)
I can see why
you like it out here.
Away from everyone.
All I ever wanted to be
was a fisherman.
Like my father.
He used to say,
"If you can find a job
you love, son,
"you won't have to do
"a hard day's work
in your life."
Wise words.
I suppose you were born
with sea legs.
No! (CHUCKLING)
No, no, no, far from it.
No.
I suffered from seasickness
so badly when I was a lad,
the others
used to call me Jonah.
-Jonah?
-As in Jonah and the Whale.
(BOTH CHUCKLING)
Someone who's bad luck.
Yeah.
Clergymen and redheads.
Also unwelcome on board.
As are women, but I expect
that's for a different reason.
I'm honoured
you've taken the risk.
You should be.
So, how'd you get over it?
Well, my father was a stubborn
bastard, that's how.
(CHUCKLING)
He'd have me out here every
day, no matter the weather.
No matter how often he
had to hose the deck down.
He tried all the old wives'
tales on me, he did.
Had me sitting
on a brown paper bag,
chewing ginger,
dabbing fresh water
behind my ears.
None of it worked, mind, no.
No, the only real cure
for seasickness
is to go and sit under a tree.
(LAUGHS) Yeah.
No, eventually, yeah,
I expect my body just adapted,
that's all.
It's amazing
what we can overcome
once we put our minds to it.
Hm. Yeah.
We should press on, we, uh...
We've still got
ten string of pods to pull
before we head back in.
(SOFT MUSIC PLAYING)
She's like a siren...
luring him onto the rocks.
What's a siren?
Similar to a mermaid,
only more dangerous.
JIM: You have chosen
your eight songs?
AUBREY: Mm-hmm.
JIM: You've got your luxury
item, you've got your book.
AUBREY: Yep.
JIM: Now, if you gotta choose
one of those songs,
Aubrey Flynn...
They always do that,
don't they?
-Uh, yeah. (LAUGHS)
-They always throw in a name.
Which one's it gonna be?
AUBREY: Can I phone a friend?
JIM: No, this is not
Who Wants To Be A Millionaire?
-This is Desert Island Discs.
-(AUBREY LAUGHING)
JIM: Which one are you
gonna choose?
AUBREY: Final answer?
JIM: Yeah, final answer.
AUBREY: Fleetwood Mac,
Landslide.
JIM: Fleetwood Mac,
Landslide it is.
Thank you very, very much
for joining us.
-(JIM HUMMING)
-(AUBREY LAUGHING)
JIM: How was that?
Was that all right?
-That was delicious.
-Good.
It's been a long time
since I've had the luxury
of actually cooking
for someone.
It's been a long time
since I've been cooked for.
JIM: Hm.
Well, I noticed you've got
your guitar here.
Mm-hmm.
Does that mean you've been
working on something?
Yeah. Yeah, always.
-Go. Go on, then.
-No. Oh, no, no. No, no.
-I couldn't.
-Go on.
I only sing for myself
these days.
All right.
All right, what if I hide
behind that chair
and then you can pretend
I'm not here?
(LAUGHING) No.
Go on. A verse.
All right, just a chorus.
-I'm too shy.
-Four bars.
-Two bars. First line.
-Sold.
Since you asked
so beautifully.
(AUBREY CLEARS THROAT)
(SINGING)
There's a hundred roads
That I've already travelled
Got a story for every day
of the year
But, baby, gotta write
us an ending
To stop my heart from
hearing words I cannot bear
Babe, I gotta let you go
We both know it
We know
Maybe I'm a complicated soul
But I can't say that
I don't wanna see you again
Ooh, babe, I gotta let you go
We both know it, yeah
We know
-That's as far as I go.
-That was beautiful.
Thank you.
JIM: Wow.
What's it all about, now,
that one?
(INHALES)
-My divorce.
-Oh.
That's a bloody eloquent
response, if I may say so.
(CHUCKLES)
My marriage ended...
and best I could come up with
was a string of four-letter
expletives, so...
I've said my fair share
of those, too.
Yeah, I'm sure.
The first I found out
about my husband's affair...
was when the tabloids
turned up
on my doorstep
with photographs.
-Oh, Christ.
-Looking for comment.
What about you?
Oh, no. You don't wanna
hear about all that.
Oh, I have aired
my dirty laundry.
Fair is fair.
Oh, yeah,
well, it was a, uh...
It was a lee shore wind
that first exposed
my wife's infidelity.
We'd been called out
to a stricken yacht
that had run aground,
was taking on water.
When we got there,
I found the captain
was bailing the water out
with his first mate...
(SMACKS LIPS)
...who happened to be my wife.
Wow. Seriously?
Yeah, it turns out they'd been
having an affair
for a couple of years.
Wow.
And old muggins here...
(CHUCKLES)
Thought she'd taken up
sea rowing.
-(BOTH CHUCKLE)
-Oh, yeah.
What did you say to her?
Well, let's just say
the trip back to the port
was something
of a choppy venture.
-(BOTH LAUGH)
-I bet it was.
At least you can
laugh about it now.
Yeah.
Yeah, that seems to be
coming a little easier,
the more time
I spend with you.
(SOFT MUSIC PLAYING)
LEADVILLE: Don't know why
we couldn't have just driven.
MAGGIE: We mustn't give them
any warning.
It's all about the element
of surprise.
Lord knows
what's going on up there.
How are you so sure
he's up there, anyway?
Call it mother's instinct.
(SEAGULLS CAWING)
But he's a grown man.
If he's decided to take
a walk on the wild side,
what can we do about it?
Stage an intervention.
I lost one man I love,
I'm not gonna lose another.
Certainly not to drink
and drugs.
-These look lovely.
-Yeah.
JIM: Here, hold up.
Now, this could be the end
of a beautiful friendship.
What could?
Ah.
There are two types
of people in this world.
There are those who
put their jam on first...
and then those poor lost souls
who reach for the cream.
There are rules
for eating scones?
Ones we live and die by.
See, if you are unfortunate
enough to be born in Devon,
then you put
the cream on first.
AUBREY: Hm.
But on this side
of the border,
we like to do things
properly, see?
Big dollop of cream
on the jam.
AUBREY: Hm.
-Thank you.
-You're welcome.
-You first.
-All right.
(GASPS)
-Oh, my God!
-(LAUGHS)
I can't believe
you've just done that.
(LAUGHING)
So, would you like me to lick
the cream off first?
Or the jam?
(STUTTERS) I don't think
we've got a rule for that.
(LAUGHS)
(KNOCKING AT DOOR)
Oh! Hello.
Is my son in there?
Oh, my God!
What has she done to you, son?
Oh. What you lot
doing up here, then?
It's all right, Jim.
We're here to help.
-Help with what?
-I told you he was in denial.
What are you banging on about?
There's no easy way
to say this, Jim,
but we've come
to take you to rehab.
Rehab? What? (SCOFFS)
(LAUGHS) Jim hasn't had
a drink in a week.
Well, I knew she'd say that.
That's what they always do, innit?
Addicts.
Cover up for each other.
I've been sober
for almost three years.
You have? Oh.
JIM: Yeah,
she's been helping me out
of the muddle
I got myself into.
And thanks to her,
the black cloud
is starting to lift. See?
Does that mean you'll be
joining the band again?
No. No, Rowan, no.
When father died,
the band died with him.
But together it's up to us
to keep them both alive!
-I'll leave you guys to it.
-JIM: Yeah.
All right.
I've spoken to Leah Jordan.
If we can come up with
a memorable marketing angle,
we are in with
a gambler's chance
of the label taking us back!
Oh, well. Good luck
with that, eh, Mother.
Tell you what,
you give me a call
when you've booked us
a nice slot
on the Pyramid Stage
at Glastonbury. Right?
I'm teaching her
how to bake a scone.
I'll see you later, all right?
BOTH: Scone?
Sorry about that.
They care.
That's nothing
to apologise for.
Hm.
(UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING)
JEZ AND FEMALE SINGER:
(SINGING) I want my love back
It's over, that is that
-This is the final act
-(JEZ LAUGHS)
I want my love back
I want my love back
Ah. This has got number one
written all over it.
(BOTH MOUTHING)
Just wait until we get her
on the chat shows.
You're not seriously
gonna let her speak?
She's fun.
She's thick.
Success is measured in record
sales, Leah, not brain cells.
Jez, she thought
Rio Ferdinand
was the capital of Brazil.
-Uh...
-(DOOR OPENS)
Hello! Um, I've got Maggie
on the phone.
(INHALES SHARPLY)
Mad Maggie?
From Cornwall. Do you want me
to tell her you're busy?
Uh, no. No. I'll take it.
-Thanks.
-(MOUTHING)
Maggie, what can I do for you?
Hello, Leah.
I got one word to say to you.
Glastonbury.
Uh, what about it?
Would the label
take the boys back
if they sang there this year?
(LEAH LAUGHS OVER SPEAKER)
Maggie,
Glastonbury is the biggest
music festival in the world.
Every A-list artist dreams
of performing there.
Only a handful
get to realise that dream.
Well, that's probably because
they don't have the special
connection we have.
LEAH: What connection?
Joseph of Arimathea.
Joseph who?
You know, Jesus's uncle,
the tinner.
He sailed from Galilee
to Saint Michael's Mount
to buy tin,
and he brought Jesus with him.
(LAUGHS)
The Son of God
came to Penzance?
We are the chosen people,
Leah.
(LAUGHS)
You may laugh, my dear...
(CHUCKLING)
But where'd you think
we got the saffron from
for the saffron buns?
Maggie, you're losing me here.
What has any of this
got to do with Glastonbury?
Well, before they went home,
Jesus and Joseph stopped off
in the Mendip Hills
to buy lead.
And Uncle Joseph
planted his staff
on the mount
above Glastonbury,
which grew into the famous
Glastonbury Thorn,
which blooms every year
at Christmas.
You know, the one the Queen
has a sprig of
on her breakfast table
before she gives the corgis
their sherry?
Sounds like you're the one
who's been
on the sherry, Maggie.
It's true.
William Blake wrote about it
in the song Jerusalem.
(SINGING) And did those feet
in ancient time
Walk upon England's
mountains green
Uh... (SIGHS)
Look, um, Maggie,
even if this
holy connection paid off,
you don't have a lead singer.
Well, if you're talking
about Jim,
he's had a change of heart.
We're all one big
happy family again.
-We are?
-You are?
He's always wanted
to play Glastonbury.
Ever since Jago took him there
in 1982 to see Van Morrison.
Okay, but what about the beef
between him and Morgan?
Wouldn't it be
a wonderful way to celebrate
them all getting back
together again?
Okay, yeah.
Keep me posted
and if anything comes of it,
I'll take it to my boss.
Okay? Good.
Thank you, take care.
And good luck!
(LAUGHS) That woman
has seriously lost the plot.
-Yeah. A tinner?
-(LAUGHS)
MAGGIE: Come on,
let's have a look.
-ROWAN: There you are.
-Oh, hello, my darlings.
Off you go.
ROWAN: Thank you.
MAGGIE: Oh.
Here.
Michael and Emily Eavis,
Worthy Farm, Glastonbury.
That's the one.
I hate to be a naysayer,
Maggie,
but how do you know
Michael Eavis
even likes lobster?
Well, it's just a little
sweetener, you know,
while he listens to the album
and reads my letter reminding
him of our holy connection.
If we manage to pull this off,
it'll be up there with
changing water into wine.
(ALL LAUGHING)
Come on, my darling.
Let's go for that walk
on the headland.
Well, have fun. We'll see you
later at lunchtime.
TAMSYN: Will do.
AUBREY: As much as I love
having you to myself,
you can't stay up here hiding
away from the world forever.
JIM: No, the trouble is
I'm not sure the world
is the same
without my father in it.
AUBREY: I know.
Why is it
the little things that...
that I miss the most?
Like the way
he'd tell a story.
Same story a hundred times,
but you'd always
wanna hear the end.
AUBREY: Hm.
JIM: And how he'd get up
every morning of his life,
before the sun,
no matter what time he'd gone
to bed the night before.
(SENTIMENTAL MUSIC PLAYING)
And his hands. (CHUCKLES)
I can't stop thinking
about his bloody hands.
He'd pull out pod
after pod after pod,
no matter what
the weather was like.
I don't know
how he managed it.
They were always so warm.
He'd pick me up
and he'd put me on his lap,
and let me take the wheel
all the way back to port.
He'd put them on my cheeks.
I was half frozen to death.
(MOBILE PHONE RINGING)
Sorry. (SNIFFLES)
-Oh, God.
-What?
Mother and Tamsyn
have gone missing.
AUBREY: Tams yn!
JIM: Tams yn!
Tam!
AUBREY: Tamsyn!
(BREATHING HEAVILY)
If anything's
happened to her,
I won't forgive myself.
ROWAN: You can't
think like that, Jim.
ROWAN: Tamsyn! Tamsyn!
-Mother!
-ROWAN: Maggie!
Tam!
Hey! Anything?
We came up from the village,
checked Blubber Point,
nothing.
-Right.
-Jim.
MORGAN: I'm here to help.
Where the hell are they?
Oh, Christ, no.
She wouldn't, would she?
What?
The mine.
(JIM BREATHING HEAVILY)
Tamsyn! Mother!
-Tamsyn!
-Maggie! Maggie!
-AUBREY: Tamsyn!
-Keep going.
Tamsyn!
(JIM PANTING)
Just stop a minute and listen!
TAMSYN: Help!
MORGAN: I heard something.
JIM: Where?
MORGAN: Over there.
Down on the ridge.
TAMSYN: Help!
Oh, Christ.
TAMSYN: Help!
JIM: Tamsyn!
TAMSYN: We're down here!
-Oh!
-Granfer!
All right, stay there!
Coastguard!
Coming, Tam.
You just stay calm, all right?
Pull this away.
One, two, three!
JIM: Mind the dust, Tam.
-Right.
-Coastguard, please!
-An emergency!
-LEADVILLE: Got you, Jim!
-You all right, Tam?
-I'm scared and cold.
-Mother! Mother!
-TAMSYN: She's not waking up.
-Is she breathing?
-She's gone to sleep.
Stay there!
Do not move an inch!
Hurry up!
-Good girl!
-TAMSYN: Don't leave!
-Coastguard's on its way, Jim.
-Tam's hurt her arm.
Looks like it could be broken.
Mother's unconscious.
Don't know about her injuries.
I'm gonna want to
get down there.
We haven't got time
to wait for the Coastguard.
We have to, Jim.
They are on a ledge,
15 foot down.
If that one gives way,
they ain't coming out.
So, you're gonna
have to lower me down
and haul us all out!
COASTGUARD: (ON RADIO)
Request for
immediate Coastguard
Rescue and helicopter assistance
to Port Isaac mine.
That's it. That's it.
Nice. Yeah. (GRUNTS)
MORGAN: Slow, slow,
slow, slow.
I'm sorry,
it was my fault, Granfer.
I begged her to take me here.
Don't you worry about a thing,
my love.
-Come on, give me more!
-JIM: Just slow, now.
I wanna make sure
this ledge can take me!
-Easy, easy, easy!
-Let it out, let it out.
Wait!
-(MORGAN GRUNTS)
TAMSYN: Watch out, Granfer!
-MORGAN: All right, Jim?
-Yeah.
-All right!
-MORGAN: Hold.
Now, the only thing
that matters
is getting you out of here,
all right, my precious?
All right.
What we're gonna do...
Let me just check
Grandma's pulse.
TAMSYN:
Is she gonna be all right?
Yeah. Yeah, of course,
she's gonna be all right.
She's strong as an ox,
like you, eh?
-JIM: All right, haul away.
-Pull!
Haul away. Up. Up.
(GRUNTING)
MORGAN: I got you!
I got you. I got you.
(JIM GRUNTS)
MORGAN: Hey, Jim! Jim!
TAMSYN: Granfer!
MORGAN: Are you all right?
ROWAN: Jim!
I'm okay.
(SIRENS WAILING)
(INAUDIBLE)
(SOLEMN MUSIC PLAYING)
Thank you.
-(SPEAKING WELSH)
-Aye?
One and all, Jim.
One and all, mate.
DOCTOR: She's got
a broken collarbone
and the ECG's
still showing signs
of an erratic heart rhythm,
which isn't unusual for
a hypothermic incident.
No, I mean, she's gonna be
all right, though, isn't she?
Obviously,
her age is a factor.
So, the next 24 hours
will be critical.
You should go home
and get some rest.
We'll call you
if anything changes.
(JIM EXHALES)
It's all right, Mother.
I'm not leaving you.
Tamsyn needs you now.
I'll stay with her.
(SOFT MUSIC PLAYING)
Thought we might
find you lot here.
Oh, hello, lads.
-Hi.
-All right?
-Yeah, yeah.
-Hi, Aubrey.
Hey.
-Hi, Tam. How's your arm?
-A bit better, thanks.
How is she?
Oh, doctor's just saying,
just gotta wait.
And hope.
(SINGING) I stood on
Cape Cornwall
In the sun's evening glow
On Chywoone Hill at Newlyn
To watch the fishing fleets go
Watched the sheave wheels
at Geevor
As they spun around
And heard the men singing
As they go underground
ALL: (SINGING)
And no one will ever
Move me from this land
Until the Lord calls me
To sit at his hand
For this is my Eden
And I'm not alone
For this is my Cornwall
And this is my home
First thing in the morning
On Chapel Carn Brea
To gaze at the Scillies
In the blue far away
For this is my Cornwall
And I'll tell you why
Because I was born here
And here I shall die
And no one will ever
Move me from this land
Until the Lord calls me
To sit at his hand
For this is my Eden
And I'm not alone
For this is my Cornwall
And this is my home
For this is my Cornwall
And this is my home
-AUBREY: A...
-(TAMSYN STRUMS GUITAR)
-AUBREY: ...to E.
-(TAMSYN STRUMS GUITAR)
AUBREY: Mm-hmm. Very good.
E, yeah. A.
Mm-hmm.
D.
It's almost a song.
(PHONE RINGING)
Jim.
-Answer the phone.
-(PHONE RINGING)
-Jim.
-Yeah.
Harbour View.
This is Jim speaking.
Hey.
Thank you. Thanks for
letting me know. Good.
Yeah. Yeah,
she's gonna be all right.
Oh, my God.
She's gonna be
all right, come here.
(EXHALES SHAKILY)
All right.
Here.
Here we are.
-Just put this down there.
-Yeah, yeah.
-Then I'm all right.
-All right, yeah, yeah.
-Careful, steady.
-I'll be all right now.
Oh. (LAUGHS)
There we go.
-Ooh.
-(BOTH CHUCKLE)
-Oh.
-Yeah. All right?
Oh.
Oh, I can't tell you how glad
I am to see this view again.
Come on. Let's get you in,
all right?
Yeah.
-JIM: Mind those steps.
-Oh.
All right. All right.
All right. All right.
(ALL CHEERING)
Steady on. Careful.
You give Long John Silver
a run for his money.
All you need is a parrot
on your shoulder.
Yeah, I gave you the
black spot and all.
(ALL EXCLAIM)
-Hello, Aubrey.
-How you feeling?
I'm grateful to be
alive, really. (LAUGHS)
And I'm even more grateful
that I've got
a great, big strong son
like I've got.
-(LAUGHS)
-JIM: There.
Hewn from that
Cornish granite just like
five generations of
fishermen before him.
That's enough now. (LAUGHS)
From what I can see,
the women are hewn
from the same rock.
Oh. (LAUGHS)
Come on,
let's get you in that seat.
Let's sit you down over here,
all right?
Don't fuss, my love.
Thank you, don't.
-Some things never change.
-(ALL LAUGH)
Thank you for looking out
for my boy.
-He's a lovely fella.
-(CHUCKLES)
-(PHONE RINGING)
-Oh.
MORGAN: Lovely to see you
up and about, Maggie.
Harbour View
Bed and Breakfast.
(INDISTINCT CONVERSATION
AND LAUGHTER)
-Granfer, it's for you.
-Yeah?
He says his name is
Michael Eavis.
Michael? Michael Eavis?
Hello? Hello?
LEADVILLE: It's him.
ROWAN: It's not him.
Oh, yeah. (CHUCKLES)
Yeah, well, you're welcome.
Oh, thank you.
No, we'd be very happy to.
Yes, yes, Michael.
Yes, yes, yes.
One more thing, yeah, yeah.
You're a silly arse
and I know what you're up to.
(JIM LAUGHS)
Oh! Danny, eh? (LAUGHS)
Oh, messing around,
putting on a dodgy
West Country accent and all.
-(LAUGHS)
-Well, but, Jim, it's, uh,
it's nearly four o'clock in
the morning in Australia.
Yeah, well, he's still getting
used to the jetlag, isn't he?
-After all this time?
-Eh?
Well, what did he say, anyway?
He said he was grateful for
the lobster we sent him,
he loved the album,
and then he invited us
to play at Glasto this year.
(ALL LAUGHING)
I think you should call
1471, love.
Oh, Mother,
why would Michael Eavis
be calling us here, eh?
How would he get hold
of our number?
I think you should check,
you know? Just in case.
ROWAN: Go on, Jim! Check!
LEADVILLE: Go on, Jim. Yeah.
ROWAN: Go on, just ring him.
(KEYPAD BEEPING)
Well...
Oh, it's ringing.
It's ringing.
Bugger me.
It is him and all.
-(ALL EXCLAIM)
-Oh, my God! Oh, my God!
(ALL LAUGHING)
What have you been up to,
Mother?
Nothing.
Just pulling a few strings.
(EXASPERATED SIGH)
Sorry, Mr Eavis.
We'd be honoured
to sing on your farm.
JIM: It would mean
the world to me
if you'd come along
to support us.
AUBREY: I'm thrilled for you.
I'm thrilled
for all of you, but...
I made a promise to myself
to never go back
to that world.
Oh. Oh.
It won't be the same
without you, you know.
That world doesn't change,
Jim.
No, people do.
You have.
And I'd be there
with you this time.
Oi! Sid and Nancy!
Hey, no. No, no, no, come on,
mate. Leave us alone.
Back on the booze again,
is it, Aubrey?
-Whoa, whoa, whoa. Oh.
-Piss off! Go on, piss off!
What do you want me to do?
Kick your bloody arse?
-Oh, Jim, no.
-(JIM SHOUTING INDISTINCTLY)
No, Jim, don't, don't! Don't!
That's what he wants!
Go on! Get out of here!
Get you nicked for that, mate.
Get you breathalysed, too!
-That's exactly what he wants.
-Thank you very much!
-God! (GROANS)
-Hey! Hey, it's all right!
What the hell
were you thinking?
No, it's over.
-It's gone!
-It's not over!
Those pictures
are gonna be everywhere!
-So what, who cares?
-I care!
Why? What? Are you...
What, are you...
Are you embarrassed to be seen
with me or something?
No! It's not about you, Jim.
You've made the papers, yes,
but you don't know
what this is like.
You have no idea
what it's like to be followed,
to be judged,
to be commented on.
You have no idea!
I came here
to get away from all that.
I came here
for a simpler life,
not a more complicated one.
No, I'm sorry about that,
but this doesn't have
to be complicated. It's...
I can't do this, I'm so sorry.
I'm so sorry.
Aubrey!
Aubrey!
(PENSIVE MUSIC PLAYING)
But they are booked
to play Glastonbury!
How much more convincing
can a man want?
Glastonbury is the issue.
(OVER SPEAKER)
The boys screwed up the Minack
in front of
The National Press.
-Shh.
-He doesn't want to risk them
humiliating the label again
on a global stage.
But I can rein 'em in.
It's not just their behaviour,
Maggie.
It's their voices.
Hello, Leah. Jim here.
What was that about voices?
There's no easy way
to say this.
The president doesn't think
you can cut it live.
Bloody cheek!
(FOLK MUSIC PLAYING)
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
GARETH: Uh-oh.
Nothing to do with me.
Oh, Christ,
what are they doing?
Ladies and gentlemen,
can I have your attention?
Please do not be alarmed,
this is not a robbery.
No need to stand up
or curtsy, for that matter.
-Have you taken a wrong turn?
-JIM: Huh?
Billingsgate Market's
that way.
Uh, we're not here to
sell you fish, Mr Chandra.
JEZ: Really?
That's right, we're here
to sing for our supper.
Well, this is lunch, actually.
Yes, and we'd like to be left
alone in peace to enjoy it
as I'm sure everybody else
here would, too.
Well, why don't we let them
be the judge of that, eh?
A sing-a-long never spoiled
anybody's appetite.
It depends who's singing it.
Well, that's the thing,
Mr Chandra.
Apparently you think that
we can't cut it.
But you've never even
seen us perform.
No, it's like sending
your food back
-before you've tasted it.
-(MORGAN CHUCKLING)
Rowan? Take it away.
(SINGING)
I've been a Wild Rover
For many a year
And I spent all my monies
on whiskey and beer
But now I'm returning
with gold in great store
And I never will play
the Wild Rover no more
MEN: (SINGING)
And it's no, nay, never
No, nay, never no more
will I play the Wild Rover
No, never, no more
I went to an alehouse
I used to frequent
And I told the landlady
my money was spent
I asked her for credit,
she answered me, nay
Such a custom as yours
I can have any day
MEN: (SINGING)
And it's no, nay, never
No, nay, never, no more
Will I play the Wild Rover
No, never, no more
I went to my parents
-Confessed what I'd done
-Yes, he did
And I asked them to pardon
their prodigal son
And when they caress me
as oft times before
I never will play
the Wild Rover no more
ALL: (SINGING)
And it's no, nay, never
No, nay, never, no more
Will I play the Wild Rover
No, never, no more
Come on, one more time!
And it's no, nay, never
No, nay, never, no more
Will I play the Wild Rover
No, never, no more
(CHEERING AND APPLAUDING)
Thank you.
Well, they do say
the customer's always right.
Well?
(INHALES SHARPLY)
You've got yourselves
a new record deal.
(ALL CHEERING)
Yes! Yes!
Get in there!
GARETH: All right.
Oh.
Proper job.
Thank you.
CHRIS EVANS: (ON RADIO)
Good morning, everybody!
If you're just tuning in,
I am joined by Port Isaac's
Fisherman's Friends.
-(ALL CHEERING)
-Come on.
You are the world's
oldest boy band, right?
With a combined age of, uh...
What's it? 643?
-That's just Leadville.
-(ALL LAUGHING)
CHRIS: How do you feel about
having being asked to sing
at Glastonbury this year?
As long as we don't forget
to put our teeth in
we'll be fine, eh?
(ALL LAUGHING)
Now, all big bands
throughout the years
have had their ups and downs
and you are no exception.
ROWAN: Well,
it'd have been a bit boring
if we hadn't weathered
a few storms.
Quite right,
but I do actually think
people listening
would like to know
what you guys fell out over.
Was it... Was it more
song list than shellfish?
It was my behaviour,
actually, Chris, I, erm...
Yeah, well, my father had
passed away, you know.
I was drowning my sorrows
and behaved
like a complete arse.
That's a big thing
to admit to.
Oh, actually, what was
bigger is, the lads here,
they supported me,
and for the most part, anyway,
they, uh... (LAUGHS)
They forgave me, too.
Well, that's a sign of
true friendship.
Yeah.
Yeah, it is.
Do you have any advice for
people listening
going through similar?
Yeah. Yeah, I do.
I know, it's been said
a thousand times before,
but it's worth repeating.
It really is okay...
not to be okay.
Well, I think
there's a lot of...
a lot of blokes out there who
find it hard to talk about
their feelings and such.
Probably starts out when
they're boys, being told to...
to man up and be strong
and, you know, "Don't cry like
a girl," that kind of thing.
And then it ends up with men
feeling embarrassed
and ashamed
when they can't cope.
Now, I learned
the hard way, see?
It's not weak to ask for help.
You know, they say that
boys don't cry, well...
This man does.
Well, I can certainly
identify with that.
Uh, for anyone just tuning in,
I am joined by Port Isaac's
Fisherman's Friends
whose brand-new album is out
at the end of June.
And if you've got a ticket
to Glastonbury,
do not miss this
old bunch of pirates
who are supporting Beyonc.
I mean,
actual factual Beyonc!
-(ALL CHEERING)
-(UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING)
FEMALE SINGER:
You're everywhere
And nowhere, baby
That's where you're at
Saying everything is groovy
When your tyres are flat
And it's hi, ho, silver lining
And away you go now, baby
I see your sun is shining
But I won't make a fuss
And it's hi, ho, silver lining
And away you go now, baby
I see your sun is shining
But I won't make a fuss
Hello! I'm here to pick up
15 Access All Areas passes
for the Fisherman's Friends.
Uh, all the food, beverage
and catering passes
are allocated
at the trader's entrance,
uh, gate G.
Oh, wait, no.
Fisherman's Friends
are a band.
(INDISTINCT RADIO CHATTER)
Yeah, they're playing
the Pyramid Stage
this afternoon, so...
-(CHUCKLES)
-(CHUCKLES) Uh, sorry.
I thought you were talking
about the cough sweets.
No, they're a band. (CHUCKLES)
(SINGING) What shall we do
with a drunken sailor?
What shall we do
with a drunken sailor?
Early in the morning!
Hooray, and up she rises...
This is supposed
to be the VIP area,
can't they just behave?
It's who they are.
Just got to grip and grin,
I suppose.
(CONTINUES SINGING)
...the morning!
(ALL CHEERING)
Black coffee, please.
Hello, Jim.
Well, it's a strange place
to come,
if you're gonna stay
under the radar.
Some things are worth
breaking cover for.
-Oh, yeah? Like what?
-Mm.
Supporting someone
I care about.
-I heard you on the radio.
-Oh. Waffling on.
No.
Saying important things that
some people needed to hear.
I shouldn't have walked away.
I shouldn't have let you.
Oh, I have missed you.
(KISSES)
Here's Mother.
Hello, Aubrey.
-Nice to see you again.
-Nice to see you, too, Maggie.
-Hi, Sally.
-Hi.
If you're thinking of,
you know,
hanging around a bit, uh,
Sally and I were wondering
if you would like to
join a rather exclusive club.
What kind of club?
The FWAGs.
FWAGs?
"Fisherman's Wives
and Girlfriends."
-Oh, Christ. Oh, Mother.
-(ALL LAUGH)
-I'd be honoured.
-Oh, good!
(MEN LAUGHING)
LEAH: Lads,
what are you doing here?
We've been looking
everywhere for you.
-Jim?
-Yeah?
Jim, what are you playing at?
You know.
It's not like we're stalking
her or anything.
"Dear Beyonc, we're happy
to share our dressing room,
"just don't go nicking
any of our songs.
"Biggest and best,
"Port Isaac's
Fisherman's Friends."
Lads, you're gonna
get us thrown out.
No, we won't.
Listen, I just been chewin'
the fat with her husband.
He's a really top bloke,
that Jay-Zed, isn't he?
It's Jay-Z, you pillock.
-(LAUGHING)
-Come on!
ROWAN: Yes!
Jay-Z since forever.
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
(MUSIC PLAYING FAINTLY
IN DISTANCE)
(EXHALING)
Fancy one last song, then?
One last song.
(CROWD CHEERING)
Oh, come on.
Oh, my God.
LEADVILLE: Here we go!
MORGAN:
Bloody hell! Look at that!
(CROWD CHEERING)
We are the Fisherman's Friends
from Port Isaac in Cornwall.
(ALL CHEERING)
Thank you, yeah.
Now we are the men
who've done for singing
what Long John Silver
did for tap dancing.
(MEN LAUGHING)
There's been
an awful lot of things
going on in the world
at the moment
that's dragging people apart.
So I'm grateful
that we're all here
in this field
at Worthy Farm today,
about to have
a good sing-song.
And that's 'cause
we all believe.
We've got much more in common
than we have which divides us.
BAND MEMBER: That's right.
And out first song
is a celebration of that.
And it's called
The Union of Different Kinds.
(CROWD CHEERING)
(SINGING)
For all the small people
And the tall people
For the dispossessed
And the observers
For all the broken-hearted
And the recently departed
For the unwashed
And the unheard
ALL: (SINGING) Mother Nature
don't draw straight lines
We're broken moulds
in a grand design
We look a mess
but we're doin' fine
We're card-carrying
lifelong members
Of the union
of different kinds
For all the lonely faces
In those empty spaces
For the unloved
And the denied
For the little wheel
Turning bigger deal
For the dreams that bloom
And those that die
ALL: (SINGING) Mother Nature
don't draw straight lines
We're broken moulds
in a grand design
We look a mess
but we're doin' fine
We're card-carrying
lifelong members
Of the union
of different kinds
-Whoo!
-(LAUGHING)
We made it. (LAUGHS)
And if you ever fancy
a change of scenery,
I think the label could use
a fixer like you.
(LAUGHS)
You're never gonna believe it!
I've just bumped into
a movie producer.
He says he wants to make
a film about the band!
Well, that's definitely
never gonna happen.
(SINGING) And the river finds
its end in the sea
Yes, it does
ALL: (SINGING) Mother Nature
don't draw straight lines
We're broken moulds
in a grand design
We look a mess
but we're doin' fine
We're card-carrying
lifelong members
Of the union
of different kinds
Come on, Glastonbury!
ALL: (SINGING) Mother Nature
don't draw straight lines
We're broken moulds
in a grand design
Let's stand up
for one last time
We're card-carrying
lifelong members
Of the union
of different kinds
(ALL CHEERING)
(CHEERING CONTINUES)
FISHERMAN'S FRIENDS: (SINGING)
There once was a ship
That put to sea
The name of the ship
was the Billy of The winds blew up,
her bow dipped down
Oh, blow, my bully boys,
blow, hey!
Soon may the Wellerman come
To bring us sugar
and tea and rum
One day,
when the tonguing is done
We'll take our leave and go
When we first got picked up,
this was the plan.
We thought, "If we get to
Glastonbury, that's it.
"We've made it."
(SINGING) The captain ordered
all hands and swore
He'd take that whale
in tow, ho!
It's a huge,
mega deal for us!
We're just hoping someone's
prepared to get up
that early in the morning
to come and see us.
(SINGING)
Take our leave and go
Before the boat
had hit the water
The whale's tail came up
and caught her...
MAN: We got through
about ten checkpoints,
-we had to strip naked...
-(ALL LAUGH)
We're finally in.
MAN 2: Well,
you didn't have to, Trev.
I didn't have to, but one
or two chose to do that.
(SINGING CONTINUES) One day,
when the tonguing is done
We'll take our leave and go
No line was cut,
no whale was freed
These songs were just evolved
by ordinary people,
and so, people can still
relate to them now,
you know,
they are the people's songs.
And we're the people
championing them.
(SINGING CONTINUES) To bring
us sugar and tea and rum
One day,
when the tonguing is done
We'll take our leave and go
-It's very muddy out there.
-It did look muddy.
It's not so bad, though,
is it?
There's nothing like
the real thing now, is there?
(SINGING CONTINUES)
Boats were lost
There were only four
But still that whale
did go, ho!
Soon may the Wellerman come
Wake up and smell the bacon.
It's the Fisherman's Friends.
(SINGING CONTINUES)
Take our leave and go
For 40 days or even more
The line went slack
then tight once more
Cornish flags. Very important.
"One and all", Cornish motto.
(SINGING CONTINUES)
Still that whale did go, ho!
Soon may the Wellerman come
To bring us sugar
and tea and rum
One day,
when the tonguing is done
Yeah, very important,
Cornish flags.
Makes us feel as though
we're at home.
(SINGING CONTINUES)
As far as I've heard
The fight's still on
The line's not cut,
the whale's not gone
The Wellerman
makes his regular call
We're feeling up for it,
aren't we? Come on, boys.
(SINGING CONTINUES)
Soon may the Wellerman come
To bring us sugar
and tea and rum
One day,
when the tonguing is done
We'll take our leave and go
Soon may the Wellerman come...
Here we go, guys.
To bring us sugar
and tea and rum
One day,
when the tonguing is done
We'll take our leave and go
(FOLK MUSIC PLAYING)
FISHERMAN'S FRIENDS:
(SINGING) What shall we do
With a drunken sailor?
What shall we do
with a drunken sailor?
What shall we do
with a drunken sailor?
Early in the morning!
Hooray, and up she rises
Hooray, and up she rises
Hooray, and up she rises
Early in the morning!
Have you seen
the captain's daughter?
Have you seen
the captain's daughter?
Have you seen
the captain's daughter?
Early in the morning!
Hooray, and up she rises
Hooray, and up she rises
Hooray, and up she rises
Early in the morning!
Keel-haul him, keel-haul him
Keel-haul him, keel-haul him
Keel-haul him, keel-haul him
Early in the morning!
Hooray, and up she rises
Hooray, and up she rises
Hooray, and up she rises
Early in the morning!
(FOLK MUSIC PLAYING)
There was a time when Cornish
men were always underground
Our techniques
and technologies
Were known the world around
But when the mines
were sleeping
There was hardship,
there was strife
And we had to travel overseas
to find a better life
On the shore
True love will wait
for evermore
So here's to tomorrow
Whatever's gone before
Cornwall lies waiting
on the shore
Oh, this is not a song
for sadness
Though that's the way it seems
We'll always have
our roots, boys
We'll always have our dreams
In every corner of the world
You'll always hear the call
Get on, boy, with our song
On with her, one and all
On the shore
Your true love will wait
for evermore
So here's to tomorrow
Whatever's gone before
Cornwall lies waiting
on the shore
On the shore
Your true love will wait
for evermore
So here's to tomorrow
Whatever's gone before
Cornwall lies waiting
on the shore
Oh, Cornwall lies waiting
on the shore
Oh, Cornwall lies waiting
on the shore
(FOLK MUSIC PLAYING)
Down, down and down he dived
John in the barrel
went over the side
Will he ever
come back up alive?
Haul him up for air, boys
Down, down and down he dived
John in the barrel
went over the side
Hold your breath
and enjoy the ride
You're gonna be
a millionaire, boy
Seventeen children
make you poor
The price of wool
right through the floor
Plenty of money to be made
Sixty feet below the waves
Down, down and down he dived
John in the barrel
went over the side
Will he ever
come back up alive?
Haul him up for air, boys
Down, down and down he dived
John in the barrel
went over the side
Hold your breath
and enjoy the ride
You're gonna be
a millionaire, boy
Viking blood
and nerves of steel
How close to heaven
do you feel?
Many stories he could tell
Down, down and down he dived
John in the barrel
went over the side
Hold your breath
and enjoy the ride
You're gonna be
a millionaire, boy