House for Two (1987) Movie Script
[Music]
[Music...]
[Noise of a restaurant]
So, the massage...
Come, come!
- Good.
- Go fuck yourself.
One.
So, gentlemen, who else?
End of bet. End!
C'mon.
Good. Perfect.
Ten.
Twenty.
- Thirty.
- You're the one.
Forty.
- A cigarette.
- Fifty.
- Go fuck yourself.
- Sixty.
I'll make more bet.
Seventy.
Seventy five!
I would win two hundreds at least.
Maybe three.
In a minute!
You could never do it, coward.
You asshole.
You would never do, you redneck!
Shit!
Aaaaah!
He looks bad.
Hold on a second.
Look, please.
You did this to me?
- Me?
- Who else, you coward? - C'mon.
[Music]
Hi.
[Music]
[Music]
- Where the hell are you?
- Hm.
- What?
- I overslept.
You've got the new young here.
Magda Koulova.
Whistle. [whistles]
You awful crap!
I'll destroy you.
You fucker! Fucking fucker!
Who do you swear at?
Thanks.
- Graybeard, lend me a twenty.
- What?
Be a human.
When I was as old as you,
I used to buy lollipops.
Don't think,
I will be working for you. Is that clear?
- Hello.
- Hi.
[Music]
Would you like a tea?
I dream about it nowadays.
It's in a shit.
My mom used to say that,
but it never was in a shit.
[Machine noise]
Yes, I would like that.
How it comes, you've come here?
Here or there.
I've always wanted to breed animals,
and now I ended up here.
Groovy, you say?
You know how nice it would be
to feed a chimpanzee for instance?
- Hi, girls!
- Hello.
Your hair smell nice.
What good do you have?
Ew! Wait.
- What's up?
- Only a shoe.
Hi.
Where did you pick up the chick?
Dan.
Good.
- Let's go, right?
- Is that possible?
Hardly earned money,
and you let him the whole sausage.
- Look, don't you have two hundreds?
- I don't.
[Church music in the phones]
Here, how is this
so you'll build up stairs from outside
and that'll make it
two autonomous units.
- We don't need such thing.
- I beg you.
You'll both get married,
women will quarell with each other.
You've got it better so.
Yeah, but everything
would be destroyed then here.
Do as you wish.
But I won't overbuild the bathroom
because of mom.
Bye then.
Damned.
[Music]
Thanks.
You're welcome.
- So young, what's with the case?
- Nice, ain't it? It's a memory.
Don't talk and show me.
Thanks.
Aaaah.... No!
- 180 crowns.
- Wait, that's too little, isn't it?
How you wish.
Alright then.
Sign it here.
- Good day.
- Good day.
What are you doing here?
I would like two bottles
of champaigne.
And the big chocolate-box there.
Dan, please, don't spend too much money.
Mum, happy birthday.
You're crazy.
[Music]
What's this?
He's nuts,
don't mind it.
- Let's buy some cement...
- And let's stole the rest.
- Dan.
- What?
I'm going to the army
in a while.
You can move a finger
because of your mum.
How it comes because of me?
The bathroom will be for you
in the first place.
You've always wanted to have
a nice bathroom.
I thought you want to marry someone.
You mean Boza?
I would like to see it.
Cheers.
Cheers.
[a song sounds]
I waited for this day
for so long
I've never met a hapinness before
- Mum, come to dance.
- Oh no... - Come.
Come mum.
May I?
Well...
Today was my happy day
And the whole world is smiling at me
Today I spotted you
and then I met my dream
I was abandoned before
But now I can only
remember it
Maybe you fell from heaven
and I could so meet my dream
And the sun shines still more
A scent of flowers is more clear
I've got all, I don't want more
Just a kiss from your lips
Because today was my happy day
My heart knows about it and sings
I saw you today
and then I met my dream
- Uaaah!
- [Jana is smiling]
What about the guy and flowers yesterday?
You're angry because mum had fun, aren't you?
I think she'l have fun as soon
as she knows where did you get all the money.
[Music]
Please, don't tell mum.
[Music]
Sorry, it lasted a little bit longer,
but I had to arrange it.
What about next week at night?
- At night?
- If you have time.
Isn't it too soon?
What...
I thought about overtime.
- I see.
- I you have an acquantaince,
I'll tell chef
to put you to magazines.
They don't do overtimes there.
You want to ge rid of me,
mr. Whistle? [whistles]
No. I don't care
who sits there and takes it.
Yeah?
- I would like that one.
- You'll overcome it in some time.
- Hi.
- Hi.
Would you like
to go out with me tonight?
[Music]
You should marry.
I can't take care of you
until death.
Ouch!
Boza!
Boza!
Well?
Wait mum, I'll try it.
- You know Boza likes you?
- Really?
- I can tell.
- It's fine that you understand each other.
But he has complex.
- That girls like me more.
- Which ones?
- So. Generally.
- I see.
What if I jumped 3 metres high?
- What about it?
- Would you go to cinema with me?
- I don't think so.
- I think so. - No. - Look.
- Are you hurt?
- Yes. Ouch...
- No. Why?
- You're so stupid.
- Are you seeing someone?
- What if yes?
Just so. Because of Boza.
Because of him?
Because of me, then.
Aaa! Ouch, ouch...
I'm home now.
- Would you like to invite me for coffee?
- I can't.
Would you like have a walk?
Try it.
[Music]
That's cool.
So let's go?
[Music]
What was that?
I don't know.
[Music]
- Mum was scared.
- I know, whatever.
So listen.
I won't move a finger
since now for you.
That's marvelous.
You mean that?
You're jealous.
You're still thinking
about Magda, aren't you?
You've got some books in a knapsack.
Return them tomorrow.
[Music]
- Hello.
- Hello.
- I've got something for you. Good day.
- Good day.
- What is it?
- A gift.
- Show me.
- You'll save his life.
Because Boza would eat it.
Uaaah!
How it comes you
didn't finish at least the part?
- It punches.
- No kidding.
No kidding and launch it.
- Who brought it here?
- Me.
- Where the han came from?
- That's a rooster.
[Music]
- One more beer!
- I won't give, you don't have money.
Go fuck yourself.
Dan, work something out.
I'll give a five,
if she shows me her legs.
What other would you like?
A five is too little,
legs are for twenty.
Here, but it has to be
on the table.
Well, good.
So go.
- No!
- But, Janicka...
- Beer!
- That's right, beer!
On the table!
Look, striptease.
Good.
Go on!
- Aaa!
- Great!
Don't step on my cigar end.
She steps like a ballet dancer.
Good, ay?
I'll give you a hundred,
if she shows her boobs.
Guys...
Boobs are minimally for two hundreds.
You are crazy, aren't you?
- Jana...
- No, no. Not at all...
Please! Go away!
Do it!
Come, come...
Brother.
Brother.
- What's up?
- Lend me a hundred.
- What?
- Lend me a hundred, taxi is waiting.
So go away with it.
Don't talk silly.
Brother, don't talk silly.
- You can lend me one hundred, can't you?
- Ask mum.
What?
Are you such a redneck?
Am I supposed to wake up
mum because of this?
Yeah. And when you wake up her,
you can tell her everything.
About Magda, too.
So come to pay it,
and then we can go through it.
Yeah?
- Boo!
- [laugh]
Do you want to have a drink?
Wait!
Look, money!
Come here!
Come here too me!
- Hi, and thanks.
- Hi.
Let's go.
So, start.
Put the glasses away.
Kill me then!
You will marry the girl.
You don't understand it.
I'm going to the army tomorrow.
- You'll take my suit.
- No.
- And you'll ask her for a hand.
- No.
- Here are the money for flowers.
- No.
You can't be serious.
Boza, it won't work.
I'm not into the marriage, really!
Maybe mum will excuse you,
but not me.
Shit!
[Music]
[Knocking on a door]
What's up?
- [knocking]
- C'mon. It can't be on fire something.
I'm coming.
Is that you?
Where do you have her?
I'm alone today, greybeard.
Tomorrow I'm going to the army.
The payment is the same.
Alone or with a chick.
- But you'll give me a bottle.
- Yeah, but fifty fifty.
What a scrooge you are.
Greybeard, how long have you been married?
I've never been married.
Long live the army, greybeard.
They'll put you in the line.
[Music]
Is he at home?
He called that he wouldn't come.
- He dislikes saying goodbye.
- Did he say something else?
So you won't be angry.
Magda Koulova.
What will be a name of the boy?
I don't know.
What about after a daddy.
What's his name?
Does it hurt you?
It hurts.
Let's go to the surgery.
[Music]
[Cry of a baby]
When Herodes saw,
that the three kings fooled him
he got angry very much and
killed all children,
dwelling in Betlehem
and all around it,
from two years and lower
according to the time, on which
he asked the kings.
It fullfiled the word
of Jeremiah, the prophet, saying:
Voice be heard,
crying and weeping of many
[Music]
Good day, I'm Whistle.
Is Magda at home?
Come in.
Zdenicka, come here!
- So that's him.
- Good day.
- What do you say about him?
- Why don't you want to marry the girl?
- Hello.
- Hello.
- That's not him.
- What?
He's a little bit confused.
Who is he then?
Explain it to him.
Invite him inside.
Come to the next room.
It depends,
how would Magda decide.
I personally would...
Daddy, please, let us.
What do you know about her?
Do you at least whose child it is?
- It doesn't matter.
- It doesn't matter?
What if he's a rogue?
But he is, I don't doubt it.
Otherwise he would marry her.
Alright.
Boza, I mean well to you.
Where did you put your brain?
I think I would have to move.
Don't worry,
but we can't stay here.
You promised you overbuild the house.
You'll do the bathroom to me.
And you wanted to repair the chimney.
I will.
But I don't want it for you anymore.
I'll wait for Dan, you know?
You don't have to invite
me to the wedding.
It is Dan.
I didn't know he does it.
- Can I release it?
- Sure.
[Music sounds]
When Dan was attending the second class,
there was a competition in kite-flying.
He made such a horrible box
and won.
I was fifteen then,
and wanted to beat him.
Why are you saying me it?
Just so.
[Music]
[Cry of a baby]
C'mon, shhh...
We're off.
[Music]
- Your bag, sir.
- Right then.
- What's this?
- I just wanted better to watch it.
- Hello, when did you return?
- Hello, yesterday.
We could go somewhere, what?
Pardon.
Have you talked to mum?
Come in.
Sit down, I'll be back in a minute.
- Hello.
- Hello.
Dan is here.
[Child is smiling]
Hello.
Hello.
Would you like some tea?
Why not.
I'll make it.
What about the army?
Quite well.
I'm off.
Wait, don't be silly.
You can't leave like this.
[Music]
What about the bathroom?
- Will you make it too?
- Yeah, sure.
Hello.
Wait.
You're still with the children.
Let me be.
[Music]
[Cry of a baby]
[Music]
I would like only to say something to you.
Something important.
It could help you.
He wasn't your brother.
I wasn't able to bear children,
so we adopted him.
And then you were born to us.
I said to myself
that you should know.
Where are you going, Dan?
Beer!
Beer!
- You don't have money.
- Swine.
Let's drink on my brother.
Choose!
Let be.
Go, go.
[Dan sings]
In Hodonin
For a soldier, they recruited me
Dan, don't be silly and go home.
Come.
Sokol, fine.
Aaaa!
[Music]
I'm going upstairs, if they will give
me brother's machine.
I thought...
In fact, I told myslef...
- Do you need something?
- That would be from you?
- You'll need to think it through.
- And what, I beg your pardon?
- I don't need anything.
- What about...
What about you'll marry again?
And I would be the one
who would marry you.
I mean it.
I thought it all through.
Your name would be the same.
And children too.
Go away, Dan. Go away!
- Get lost.
- Magda, I will love you.
- I will love you all.
- Get lost now!
[Music]
Yes. Sure.
Of course not tonight.
- I want to speak with you.
- Wait a little.
By a tram.
Of course, by a tram.
A fan, grandpa.
You, of course.
No, not by a car.
Not at a...
It is out of the question.
[Music]
[Street noise]
[Music]
Boza!
[Music]
What are you doing here?
[Music...]
[Noise of a restaurant]
So, the massage...
Come, come!
- Good.
- Go fuck yourself.
One.
So, gentlemen, who else?
End of bet. End!
C'mon.
Good. Perfect.
Ten.
Twenty.
- Thirty.
- You're the one.
Forty.
- A cigarette.
- Fifty.
- Go fuck yourself.
- Sixty.
I'll make more bet.
Seventy.
Seventy five!
I would win two hundreds at least.
Maybe three.
In a minute!
You could never do it, coward.
You asshole.
You would never do, you redneck!
Shit!
Aaaaah!
He looks bad.
Hold on a second.
Look, please.
You did this to me?
- Me?
- Who else, you coward? - C'mon.
[Music]
Hi.
[Music]
[Music]
- Where the hell are you?
- Hm.
- What?
- I overslept.
You've got the new young here.
Magda Koulova.
Whistle. [whistles]
You awful crap!
I'll destroy you.
You fucker! Fucking fucker!
Who do you swear at?
Thanks.
- Graybeard, lend me a twenty.
- What?
Be a human.
When I was as old as you,
I used to buy lollipops.
Don't think,
I will be working for you. Is that clear?
- Hello.
- Hi.
[Music]
Would you like a tea?
I dream about it nowadays.
It's in a shit.
My mom used to say that,
but it never was in a shit.
[Machine noise]
Yes, I would like that.
How it comes, you've come here?
Here or there.
I've always wanted to breed animals,
and now I ended up here.
Groovy, you say?
You know how nice it would be
to feed a chimpanzee for instance?
- Hi, girls!
- Hello.
Your hair smell nice.
What good do you have?
Ew! Wait.
- What's up?
- Only a shoe.
Hi.
Where did you pick up the chick?
Dan.
Good.
- Let's go, right?
- Is that possible?
Hardly earned money,
and you let him the whole sausage.
- Look, don't you have two hundreds?
- I don't.
[Church music in the phones]
Here, how is this
so you'll build up stairs from outside
and that'll make it
two autonomous units.
- We don't need such thing.
- I beg you.
You'll both get married,
women will quarell with each other.
You've got it better so.
Yeah, but everything
would be destroyed then here.
Do as you wish.
But I won't overbuild the bathroom
because of mom.
Bye then.
Damned.
[Music]
Thanks.
You're welcome.
- So young, what's with the case?
- Nice, ain't it? It's a memory.
Don't talk and show me.
Thanks.
Aaaah.... No!
- 180 crowns.
- Wait, that's too little, isn't it?
How you wish.
Alright then.
Sign it here.
- Good day.
- Good day.
What are you doing here?
I would like two bottles
of champaigne.
And the big chocolate-box there.
Dan, please, don't spend too much money.
Mum, happy birthday.
You're crazy.
[Music]
What's this?
He's nuts,
don't mind it.
- Let's buy some cement...
- And let's stole the rest.
- Dan.
- What?
I'm going to the army
in a while.
You can move a finger
because of your mum.
How it comes because of me?
The bathroom will be for you
in the first place.
You've always wanted to have
a nice bathroom.
I thought you want to marry someone.
You mean Boza?
I would like to see it.
Cheers.
Cheers.
[a song sounds]
I waited for this day
for so long
I've never met a hapinness before
- Mum, come to dance.
- Oh no... - Come.
Come mum.
May I?
Well...
Today was my happy day
And the whole world is smiling at me
Today I spotted you
and then I met my dream
I was abandoned before
But now I can only
remember it
Maybe you fell from heaven
and I could so meet my dream
And the sun shines still more
A scent of flowers is more clear
I've got all, I don't want more
Just a kiss from your lips
Because today was my happy day
My heart knows about it and sings
I saw you today
and then I met my dream
- Uaaah!
- [Jana is smiling]
What about the guy and flowers yesterday?
You're angry because mum had fun, aren't you?
I think she'l have fun as soon
as she knows where did you get all the money.
[Music]
Please, don't tell mum.
[Music]
Sorry, it lasted a little bit longer,
but I had to arrange it.
What about next week at night?
- At night?
- If you have time.
Isn't it too soon?
What...
I thought about overtime.
- I see.
- I you have an acquantaince,
I'll tell chef
to put you to magazines.
They don't do overtimes there.
You want to ge rid of me,
mr. Whistle? [whistles]
No. I don't care
who sits there and takes it.
Yeah?
- I would like that one.
- You'll overcome it in some time.
- Hi.
- Hi.
Would you like
to go out with me tonight?
[Music]
You should marry.
I can't take care of you
until death.
Ouch!
Boza!
Boza!
Well?
Wait mum, I'll try it.
- You know Boza likes you?
- Really?
- I can tell.
- It's fine that you understand each other.
But he has complex.
- That girls like me more.
- Which ones?
- So. Generally.
- I see.
What if I jumped 3 metres high?
- What about it?
- Would you go to cinema with me?
- I don't think so.
- I think so. - No. - Look.
- Are you hurt?
- Yes. Ouch...
- No. Why?
- You're so stupid.
- Are you seeing someone?
- What if yes?
Just so. Because of Boza.
Because of him?
Because of me, then.
Aaa! Ouch, ouch...
I'm home now.
- Would you like to invite me for coffee?
- I can't.
Would you like have a walk?
Try it.
[Music]
That's cool.
So let's go?
[Music]
What was that?
I don't know.
[Music]
- Mum was scared.
- I know, whatever.
So listen.
I won't move a finger
since now for you.
That's marvelous.
You mean that?
You're jealous.
You're still thinking
about Magda, aren't you?
You've got some books in a knapsack.
Return them tomorrow.
[Music]
- Hello.
- Hello.
- I've got something for you. Good day.
- Good day.
- What is it?
- A gift.
- Show me.
- You'll save his life.
Because Boza would eat it.
Uaaah!
How it comes you
didn't finish at least the part?
- It punches.
- No kidding.
No kidding and launch it.
- Who brought it here?
- Me.
- Where the han came from?
- That's a rooster.
[Music]
- One more beer!
- I won't give, you don't have money.
Go fuck yourself.
Dan, work something out.
I'll give a five,
if she shows me her legs.
What other would you like?
A five is too little,
legs are for twenty.
Here, but it has to be
on the table.
Well, good.
So go.
- No!
- But, Janicka...
- Beer!
- That's right, beer!
On the table!
Look, striptease.
Good.
Go on!
- Aaa!
- Great!
Don't step on my cigar end.
She steps like a ballet dancer.
Good, ay?
I'll give you a hundred,
if she shows her boobs.
Guys...
Boobs are minimally for two hundreds.
You are crazy, aren't you?
- Jana...
- No, no. Not at all...
Please! Go away!
Do it!
Come, come...
Brother.
Brother.
- What's up?
- Lend me a hundred.
- What?
- Lend me a hundred, taxi is waiting.
So go away with it.
Don't talk silly.
Brother, don't talk silly.
- You can lend me one hundred, can't you?
- Ask mum.
What?
Are you such a redneck?
Am I supposed to wake up
mum because of this?
Yeah. And when you wake up her,
you can tell her everything.
About Magda, too.
So come to pay it,
and then we can go through it.
Yeah?
- Boo!
- [laugh]
Do you want to have a drink?
Wait!
Look, money!
Come here!
Come here too me!
- Hi, and thanks.
- Hi.
Let's go.
So, start.
Put the glasses away.
Kill me then!
You will marry the girl.
You don't understand it.
I'm going to the army tomorrow.
- You'll take my suit.
- No.
- And you'll ask her for a hand.
- No.
- Here are the money for flowers.
- No.
You can't be serious.
Boza, it won't work.
I'm not into the marriage, really!
Maybe mum will excuse you,
but not me.
Shit!
[Music]
[Knocking on a door]
What's up?
- [knocking]
- C'mon. It can't be on fire something.
I'm coming.
Is that you?
Where do you have her?
I'm alone today, greybeard.
Tomorrow I'm going to the army.
The payment is the same.
Alone or with a chick.
- But you'll give me a bottle.
- Yeah, but fifty fifty.
What a scrooge you are.
Greybeard, how long have you been married?
I've never been married.
Long live the army, greybeard.
They'll put you in the line.
[Music]
Is he at home?
He called that he wouldn't come.
- He dislikes saying goodbye.
- Did he say something else?
So you won't be angry.
Magda Koulova.
What will be a name of the boy?
I don't know.
What about after a daddy.
What's his name?
Does it hurt you?
It hurts.
Let's go to the surgery.
[Music]
[Cry of a baby]
When Herodes saw,
that the three kings fooled him
he got angry very much and
killed all children,
dwelling in Betlehem
and all around it,
from two years and lower
according to the time, on which
he asked the kings.
It fullfiled the word
of Jeremiah, the prophet, saying:
Voice be heard,
crying and weeping of many
[Music]
Good day, I'm Whistle.
Is Magda at home?
Come in.
Zdenicka, come here!
- So that's him.
- Good day.
- What do you say about him?
- Why don't you want to marry the girl?
- Hello.
- Hello.
- That's not him.
- What?
He's a little bit confused.
Who is he then?
Explain it to him.
Invite him inside.
Come to the next room.
It depends,
how would Magda decide.
I personally would...
Daddy, please, let us.
What do you know about her?
Do you at least whose child it is?
- It doesn't matter.
- It doesn't matter?
What if he's a rogue?
But he is, I don't doubt it.
Otherwise he would marry her.
Alright.
Boza, I mean well to you.
Where did you put your brain?
I think I would have to move.
Don't worry,
but we can't stay here.
You promised you overbuild the house.
You'll do the bathroom to me.
And you wanted to repair the chimney.
I will.
But I don't want it for you anymore.
I'll wait for Dan, you know?
You don't have to invite
me to the wedding.
It is Dan.
I didn't know he does it.
- Can I release it?
- Sure.
[Music sounds]
When Dan was attending the second class,
there was a competition in kite-flying.
He made such a horrible box
and won.
I was fifteen then,
and wanted to beat him.
Why are you saying me it?
Just so.
[Music]
[Cry of a baby]
C'mon, shhh...
We're off.
[Music]
- Your bag, sir.
- Right then.
- What's this?
- I just wanted better to watch it.
- Hello, when did you return?
- Hello, yesterday.
We could go somewhere, what?
Pardon.
Have you talked to mum?
Come in.
Sit down, I'll be back in a minute.
- Hello.
- Hello.
Dan is here.
[Child is smiling]
Hello.
Hello.
Would you like some tea?
Why not.
I'll make it.
What about the army?
Quite well.
I'm off.
Wait, don't be silly.
You can't leave like this.
[Music]
What about the bathroom?
- Will you make it too?
- Yeah, sure.
Hello.
Wait.
You're still with the children.
Let me be.
[Music]
[Cry of a baby]
[Music]
I would like only to say something to you.
Something important.
It could help you.
He wasn't your brother.
I wasn't able to bear children,
so we adopted him.
And then you were born to us.
I said to myself
that you should know.
Where are you going, Dan?
Beer!
Beer!
- You don't have money.
- Swine.
Let's drink on my brother.
Choose!
Let be.
Go, go.
[Dan sings]
In Hodonin
For a soldier, they recruited me
Dan, don't be silly and go home.
Come.
Sokol, fine.
Aaaa!
[Music]
I'm going upstairs, if they will give
me brother's machine.
I thought...
In fact, I told myslef...
- Do you need something?
- That would be from you?
- You'll need to think it through.
- And what, I beg your pardon?
- I don't need anything.
- What about...
What about you'll marry again?
And I would be the one
who would marry you.
I mean it.
I thought it all through.
Your name would be the same.
And children too.
Go away, Dan. Go away!
- Get lost.
- Magda, I will love you.
- I will love you all.
- Get lost now!
[Music]
Yes. Sure.
Of course not tonight.
- I want to speak with you.
- Wait a little.
By a tram.
Of course, by a tram.
A fan, grandpa.
You, of course.
No, not by a car.
Not at a...
It is out of the question.
[Music]
[Street noise]
[Music]
Boza!
[Music]
What are you doing here?