Kids vs. Aliens (2022) Movie Script
1
[ Down-tempo music plays ]
How much longer
till we go home?
Captain decides
when we go home!
Can you go ask him?
Jesus Christ!
No one's gonna ask the captain
what time they can go home!
Got it, kid?
Jesus.
Empty.
Got to soak them again, Cap!
Gonna be a long one tonight,
boys.
[ Energy resonates ]
Mother of Jesus.
-What the fuck?
-Jesus, Mary, and Joseph.
What the fuck's that?
Get the fuck down!
Fuck!
You boys all right?
What the fuck was that?!
I don't know.
[ Dramatic music plays ]
What do you think it is?
I don't think it's a plane.
I don't think
we should be here.
Boys, we're -- we're getting
out of here.
[ Underwater bellowing ]
-MAN: Aaah!
-Bruce!
Bruce!
Bruce!
Bruce!
Bruce!
-Bruce!
-[ Water sloshes ]
Aah!
CAPTAIN: Jimmy!
Jimmy!
J-Jimmy!
J-Jimmy?
Jim?
Who's out there?!
[ Creature growling ]
[ Water splashes ]
[ Up-tempo rock music plays ]
GARY:
There's Dinos dead ahead!
Fire the laser cannon!
-Yeah!
-Yeah!
[ Coughing ]
There's Dinos dead ahead.
-Let's teach them how to die.
-You'll die this time!
This Dino spine is mine!
Aaaaah!
Let's go berserk!
Yeah!
GARY:
Your Dino treachery ends here!
No! No!
[ Grunting ]
Stop! Stop it!
Stop! Stop!
[ Electricity crackling ]
[ Grunting ]
-[ Electricity crackling ]
-[ Screaming ]
It's the Dino Sorcerer.
Prepare to die,
you human fleshbags!
-Eat him alive!
-Yeah!
[ Chain saw buzzing ]
Do a dropkick!
Aaah!
Yeah!
Ha ha!
Your space magic
doesn't scare me.
Then clearly
you don't understand
the true power
of the crystal.
Give me the crystal!
Never!
You should have stayed extinct.
DINO: Shit.
Gary, this is stupid.
GARY: What?
What are you talking about?
Yeah.
What's wrong?
This is so -- like...
I got to shoot him in the head?
That's it?
Why does he get a sword
and I don't?
GARY: Well, first of all,
you have a gun, stupid.
Guns are better than swords.
And, two, you're a girl.
You don't use swords.
Um, that's not true.
Girls totally use swords.
I kick ass with a sword.
Well, guess what.
One, I don't care.
Two, I'm the director, so that's
just how it's going to be.
And three, we need to get
the shot before it gets dark.
So come on.
Let's shoot this thing.
Okay. Action!
You should have stayed extinct.
[ Bottle shatters ]
Holy shit.
Are you okay?
Ow!
What the fuck?
Who threw a beer bottle
at me?!
BILLY: I did.
You little piss trap.
This would be a great place
to party.
Oh, fucking teenagers.
I always thought
this place was abandoned.
-It's Billy McDougal! Run!
-Holy shit.
[ Indistinct shouting ]
Guys, guys!
Are you fucking serious?
You ruined the fucking movie!
Get out of our clubhouse,
and stop smoking in here.
This place is a fucking dump.
I'm gonna put this clown
to sleep.
No, Miles, don't.
GARY:
Yeah, kick his ass!
Yeah, smile when I knock
your fucking mouth out.
GARY: Get him!
BILLY: Hey, whoa, whoa.
Oh!
Stop!
Stop it!
-MILES: Fuck off!
-SAM: Leave him alone.
MILES: [ Grunting ]
I'm serious.
Knock it off.
Fuck off, man.
I said knock it off!
Fuck, man.
MILES: Get the fuck off me!
Jesus.
Hey, please use
your brain next time.
-You good, man?
-Yeah, I'm fine.
Hey, haven't I seen you
at school before?
Oh, come on.
You have.
Yeah.
Pretty girl like you.
How could I not?
Why the fuck are you hanging out
with these losers anyway?
Um, well, he's my brother,
those are his friends,
and they're not losers.
Okay?
TRISH: Um [Chuckles]
Why don't you have friends
your own age?
I do.
I'm just babysitting them.
[ Scoffs ]
Babysitting?
You wanted to be
in our movie, didn't you?
-[ Whispering ] Stop it.
-Why are you telling me to stop?
-Please.
-You got a boyfriend, Sam?
No.
You fucking anybody?
[ Scoffs ]
Stop.
Gross.
[ Laughs ]
She's not your type, Billy.
She's still a kid.
Look at how she dresses.
Sam's way cooler than you,
you troglodytes.
What's a troglodyte?
Oh, it's like a --
like a caveman.
It's calling them, like,
underdeveloped, stupid.
-That's you guys.
-Why the fuck are we still here?
This shit is lame.
Let's dip.
GARY:
Yeah, run away.
I hope to see you around,
Sam.
They're lucky I didn't leave
them in a pile of blood.
Yeah, those guys
are assholes.
Yeah,
they weren't very nice.
GARY: Come on, Jack.
Say something meaner.
JACK:
They were dumb.
BROADCASTER: Divers are still
searching for three fishermen
whose boat was found adrift
earlier this week.
Many people reported
seeing a fiery object
fall from the sky
that same evening.
It is unknown
if the two events are related,
but police are asking for
any witnesses to come forward.
In other news, Halloween
is only two days away.
Do you know what costume
you'll be wearing?
Coming up,
we've got some great ideas.
[ Cellphone chimes ]
[ Knock on door ]
GARY: Sam, why do you always
lock your door?
Sam, I know you're in there.
Are you coming out to wrestle
or not?
Not right now.
What?
Come on. Why not?
We need you.
Because I don't
feel like it.
Come on.
We need you
for this movie.
I thought you were gonna be
my tag-team partner.
Come on.
Why not?
Gary, I have homework.
[ Cellphone chimes ]
[ Playing mid-tempo music ]
Just shoot it without me.
And don't do anything
that'll get me in trouble.
Fine.
Be like that!
You wanted me,
and I didn't see it
Now I'm so lost without you
Get off me, dummy!
GARY: Nice.
Where's Sam?
Uh, she needed
to do homework.
What the fuck?
Why would she want a main role
in the movie
if she's not gonna be in it?
Yeah, I know.
I thought the exact same thing.
It's kind of weird.
She's never ditched us before.
Jack, here are the glow sticks
you wanted.
Sweet. Thanks.
What are you even doing?
I already told you.
I'm working on the grand finale
for the movie,
and it's going to be glorious.
Sure.
Yeah, just, um, don't blow
anything up, please.
No promises.
Wait.
So she totally ditched us
for homework.
Yeah.
Well, guess what.
Sucks to be her
because she won't get to film
the best movie ever.
Let's film this fucking thing.
It's pandemonium here
as one half of the Berserkers
faces off against
the treacherous Dino Sorcerer.
A match that's been
65 million years in the making.
-Now let's rumble!
-[ Bell dings ]
DINO:
My kind was frozen in the dirt
until the souls of your
ancestors brought us back!
I can't believe it!
The Dino Sorcerer has brought
the Berserker to his knees.
[ Roars ]
[ Grunting ]
Holy smokes, folks!
We're watching history
rewrite itself.
Just because my tag-team partner
isn't willing to help me
because they have homework,
that doesn't mean
that I'm not ready
to fight anything and anyone
in this shithole universe
to protect my Planet Earth.
[ Roars ]
The Dino Sorcerer is hurt.
The fate of the planet
comes down to this very moment.
I'm unstoppable!
Oh, fuck!
[ Groaning ]
My arm!
I broke it!
Go get my sister!
Go, go!
Jack, go!
Don't be a wuss, man.
You don't be a fucking dumbass!
Get off my arm!
-[ Shrieking ]
-It's not my fault!
Fuck, fuck, fuck!
Mom and Dad are gonna piss!
I just broke my arm.
Can you stop yelling at me
for fucking second?
SAM:
I didn't want to bike
to the fucking hospital today,
you moron!
GARY: Too fucking bad!
I broke my arm!
God.
Sam, this looks so cool!
It's like glow-in-the-dark
and everything.
Why do you look like that?
Like what?
Like that.
It looks stupid.
Gary, you fell off a ladder.
At least I was doing something
for the movie.
You really picked
an inconvenient time
to break your arm, honey.
It's not like I planned it.
Well, maybe next time
you should.
Your father and I
have a flight tonight.
But you just got back.
We'll only be gone
a couple of days.
And you got your big sister
to take care of you.
No way.
No, I was gonna go out
for Halloween.
Oh, honey, you look...
different.
-Yeah. See?
-No, I don't.
-You look different.
-I literally don't.
-Yes, you do.
-DAD: I know it's important.
I'm just dealing
with some family shit.
MOM: I'm sure you'll have
a nice Halloween together.
DAD: They're there now.
Okay. Yeah.
We're on our way.
Hey, bud, we have to head off
to the airport, okay?
You're good to get home
with Sam, right?
I mean,
yeah, sure, I can bike.
Great. By Gary.
We love you.
Outside.
What?
What did I do?
You're in trouble!
-[ Metal clangs ]
-Ow!
This isn't fair.
Look, we put our trust in you
to be the responsible one.
You bought him the ring.
You were supposed to be
in charge.
I thought that meant
something to you.
No phone,
no friends over.
Is Gary allowed to have friends
over there?
Gary's punishment
is having a broken arm.
-Are you serious right now?
-We've got to go.
No, no, no. I will not be stuck
at home with Gary.
-You've got the cats.
-We don't have any cats.
If you ever want one,
I will buy you one.
Just keep an eye
on your brother, okay?
If we die, he's all you've got.
See you when we get back.
[ Sighing ]
TRISH: What the fuck
are we doing for Halloween?
I don't know.
I haven't heard shit.
I just want to get fucked up
and do some fucked-up shit.
Billy, what are we doing?
-Billy?
-Billy.
I'm working on something.
[ Mockingly ] Working on
something.
-[ Helicopter blades whirring ]
-[ Police radio chatter ]
MAN:
Going for another pass.
Situation 14-9 confirmed.
We have the location
and remains of the fishermen.
Do we have eyes on the target?
Negative.
Orders are
to immediately detain
the suspect who was reported,
and the site is to be sealed
and cleared.
Copy.
GARY: All right.
Action!
Aaaah!
Your Dino treachery
ends here.
DINO: Surrender your
earthly flesh!
You'll never take my skin!
GARY:
And now dropkick him!
What?
I-I can't do that.
GARY: Uh, just try it.
Come on.
But Sam's
the dropkick expert.
Eh, forget Sam.
We need more dropkicks.
-Come on, do it!
-Come on, kick me!
-GARY: Yeah, screw Sam!
-All right. You're the boss.
Sorry.
I told you.
Uh, just do the line!
Give me the crystal!
Yeah, now scream it
this time!
-Give me the crystal!
-Car!
What the fuck?!
Guys!
-You guys okay?
-Yeah.
What are you doing here?!
I'm here to see your sister.
-Dude!
-What the hell?!
Guys, you know
what this means?
He's gonna make you
an uncle.
Gross.
No.
This means war.
Billy.
Hey.
Hi. I didn't know
you were coming over.
Yeah, you said
your parents were gone,
so I thought it'd be cool
to come over.
Nice place.
This place
is fucking perfect.
Yep.
This is my house.
Jeez.
Parents must be rich.
[ Chuckles ]
They should be.
I mean,
they work all the time, so...
Yeah.
So you gonna show me around,
or what?
No.
Is this your room?
Yes, but, oh, my gosh,
close your eyes.
-It's a disaster.
-No, it's not.
Whoa.
This is cool.
Kr-kr-kr.
Yeah.
Got a lot of neat stuff.
-What is this?
-Oh, my God, no.
It's just something
I was, like, working on.
I thought maybe I'd, like, wear
it for Halloween or something.
Oh.
I think it'd look
very cute on you.
Who is she?
That is Valora.
She's my favorite wrestler.
She's cool.
She stands for, like,
strength and bravery
and never surrendering
to your enemies.
Always kicking ass.
Cool.
I used to be into wrestling
when I was kid.
Think you could take me?
You?
No problem.
All right, go easy on me.
Oh!
You like my moves?
All right, yeah.
Can I show you mine?
Do you really think
I'm pretty?
I think you're beautiful.
GARY:
They're in here.
Okay.
You guys ready to make these
guys wish they were never born?
What do you think
they're doing?
Sucking and fucking,
for sure.
Well, suck time...is over.
Holy shit.
I know.
-[ Electronic music blares ]
-[ Indistinct shouting ]
This is for the beer bottle,
you creep!
[ Indistinct shouting ]
BILLY:
Aah! Fuck!
SAM: Get out!
MILES: You asshole!
Fuck you up!
You are fucking dead!
Ow!
You missed me,
you little fuck!
Oh, my God.
I'm sorry, Sam.
-[ Energy resonates ]
-[ Music stops ]
[ All groan ]
What the hell?
What was that?
-Quit breathing on me.
-Shut the fuck up!
Gary, what the fuck
did you do?
That wasn't me.
Gary, I am so sick
of being responsible
for all the stupid shit
that you do.
Grow up,
stop being such a loser,
and stay out of
my fucking life.
-And get of my room!
-Get your hands off!
[ Boys groaning ]
Fuck you, Sam!
I don't want to be
in your shit life anyway!
Stay out of mine!
No, Billy, what are you --
ow!
-Ow!
-Get the fuck out of here
before I rip
your fucking shrimp dicks off!
Well, guess what.
If you even touch our shrimp
dicks, you'll go to jail!
Fucking pervert!
Screw you, Billy.
Gone.
[ Both laugh ]
MILES:
Man, Sam's changed.
JACK: Hey, guys, what do
you think that light was?
-It really freaked me out.
-I don't know.
It sounded like a -- whaa! --
or something like that.
I don't know.
Hey, Gary, you all right?
I fucking hate that guy.
He ruins everything.
Fucking hate that guy too.
Right? He ruins everything.
He's annoying.
Hey, guys, look.
[ Energy resonating ]
GARY: That must be where
it's coming from.
Wait, guys,
we don't know what that is.
Don't be a chickenshit.
Come on.
GARY: Whoa!
Look at that.
MILES: Looks like something
out of a movie or something.
-GARY: Yeah.
-JACK: Hey, don't go near it.
-GARY: Why?
-MILES: Yeah, why?
JACK: Well, what if that light
and sound was a ship exploding,
and this is poisonous gas
from whatever blew it up?
Like napalm gas?
Yeah. Or something from space,
like aliens or something.
You're just being paranoid.
GARY:
Why'd it turn off?
Guys, we're gonna tell Sam
about this, right?
No.
Fuck Sam.
Yeah. I'd rather go
punch myself in the dick.
Anyone else hungry?
Let's go chew something.
Yeah.
There's something weird
going on around here.
Wait.
Hey, guys, wait up.
[ Creature snarling ]
[ Grunts softly ]
Crystal.
We need the crystal.
Aah!
Something's got me!
Help!
-Yaah!
-Yaah!
Billy and his prick friends
are hanging out with Sam
in my backyard.
Let's go spy on them.
-Fuck yeah! Let's go!
-Yeah!
Haven't seen your brother
and those little creeps around.
Yeah.
It's kind of nice.
Yeah, that little shit must have
finally learned his lesson.
Are we partying tonight,
or what?
I don't know yet.
Great. Another boring Halloween
in this shithole town.
Yeah, well,
whatever you're doing
is better
than what I have to do.
I have to take care
of my little brother.
Yeah.
No, thanks.
Well, shit.
We got to do something.
We should have a party.
Yeah, you guys
should totally do that.
We should party
in that old shitty barn.
BILLY: No, the place is filled
with little kids' shit.
We should have it here.
What?
Well, yeah.
That way, you can go.
[ Chuckles ] Yeah, right,
that's not happening.
Why not?
I'm sure you have a costume.
Yeah, she does.
And it is very fucking cute.
How about that?
Why not?
Um, because my parents
will kill me.
Fuck parents, man.
Who cares what they think?
You should just
do what you want.
Hold on.
What if
we just call your parents
and ask them
if we can have the party here?
Problem solved.
Think about
what you just said.
Sounds good, man.
TRISH: [ Laughing ]
Fuck you, Billy!
Fucking freezing out here!
Holy fuck!
It's just water, you pussy.
Fuck you guys!
You're fucking drenched, bud.
[ Laughs ]
Hey, we'll keep it small,
and your parents won't find out.
I promise.
Billy.
-I don't know.
-Come on.
I want to show you off
to everyone at school.
I want them to meet
my new girlfriend.
Really?
And my parents won't find out?
I swear on your life.
Okay.
Really?
Let's have a party.
We're having a party.
[ Laughter ]
Party! Whoo!
Sam.
[ Laughing ]
Ha ha!
All right, boys.
Tonight we inflict
maximum vengeance.
MILES: Come on.
GARY: Miles!
TRISH: Ahh!
[ Electronic music blaring ]
Happy fucking Halloween!
[ People cheering ]
GIRL: Sam?
Sam!
Hey! What are you doing here?
I never see you at parties.
No, my party.
This is my house.
Have you seen, Billy?
This is your house?
Holy shit!
Yeah, my parents
would kill me.
I mean, sometimes you just have
to, like, do what you want.
-You know?
-Yeah, totally.
Wouldn't be letting people paint
on my walls, though, you know?
What?
Sorry.
Excuse me.
Whoo!
Dallas,
what the hell are you doing?
What? Billy said you were
cool with it.
Would you do this
to your parents' house?
Billy, what the fuck?
People can't smoke in here.
Hey.
What's wrong?
Billy, this is seriously crazy.
You said this was gonna be
a small party.
This is out of control. You have
to help me do something.
Look, Sam, people are having
a good time.
That's what's important.
But the house
is getting destroyed.
Okay.
Your parents are very rich.
They can just fix it all.
Billy, help me.
My parents
are gonna murder me.
[ Retching ]
Okay.
-Party's over.
-Come on, just let it go.
-What do you mean, let it go?
-Just chill the fuck out.
You can't make
all these people leave now.
-It's my house.
-Yeah, well, it's my party.
Billy, is that your girlfriend
or something?
No, man. She's just
the keys to the house.
Okay, people, party's over.
Safe drive.
Actually, don't drive, please.
Bye.
-Get out.
-Sam!
What the fuck are you doing?
Billy, stop.
You're hurting me.
You said
we could have a party,
and that's what we're gonna
fucking do.
Do you understand me?
You scaring me.
Good.
Party's back on.
Let's tear this place apart!
Whoo!
Go fucking break something.
They're gonna regret
trashing my house.
Fucking teenagers.
What is that costume even
supposed to be?
Bro, what's up
with your house?
It's being destroyed.
We know you didn't get any
candy, so we got you covered.
Okay, what's the mission status,
captain?
Just hooked up the drone, and
I'm locking down on the enemy.
What do you think
he's going to do?
Something stupid.
How do you know?
Because it's Billy.
He's bound to do something
stupid.
What a stupid idiot.
Move.
Get the fuck out of my way.
Get the fuck out of my way.
Nice costume, bitch.
Get the fuck out.
I need to piss.
Come on, my dick's full!
TRISH: Hey, Billy.
There's a better bathroom
in here.
God is good.
Holy shit.
Is that Sam's room?
I can't hear
what they're saying.
Shh.
Be quiet and you listen.
Take it out, Billy.
Trish, I got to piss.
Then do it.
If you'll let me hold it.
You are so fucking weird,
Trish.
Is that suck time?
That's not suck time.
Boys, we just hit
the mother lode.
TRISH: [ Laughing ]
Sorry, Jack, you shouldn't
be seeing this.
Fuck my life.
JACK: Listen up, all you
scumbags and scumballs.
Now, pay attention to the TV.
Hit 'em, Gary.
When I was a kid,
I thought I had
the coolest sister
in the world.
God, Gary,
what are you doing?
But I was wrong.
I mean, what happened
to you, Samantha?
You could have been tough.
You could have kicked ass
in the ring,
and you could have been
a legend.
But then you walked away.
You abandoned the ring...
Let's go!
You get that shit, Gary?!
Yeah!
...the fans, Jack, Miles.
You abandoned me
and all the respect you earned
for someone
who treats you like shit.
[ Laughing ]
Oh, my God, Trish,
Sam is such a fucking idiot.
We throw the best party
of the fucking year,
and then she tries
to kick everybody out.
She's such a fucking moron,
dude.
What did you expect?
She's not cool.
She hangs out
with little boys.
Yo, Billy.
Can't you see
I'm doing someone -- something?
Sam's little brother's
on TV talking shit
about you out there.
Come on, let's go.
Get the fuck up.
Get your clothes on. Let's go.
BILLY: Look, she fucking plays
with action figures
and is into wrestling.
It was so fucking hard
not to laugh
in her fucking face
when I found out.
TRISH:
Oh, my God.
Did you see
her costume tonight?
She looks like
a fucking child.
[ Laughter ]
Take it out, Billy.
BILLY:
Trish, I got to piss.
TRISH:
Then do it.
If you'll let me hold it.
BILLY: You are so fucking weird,
Trish.
TRISH: Oh!
[ Laughs ]
-BILLY: Get it everywhere.
-TRISH: I know! [ Laughs ]
Oh, my God.
GARY: That's the respect
you deserve
when you betray
your teammates.
Your boyfriend's pissing
all over your room.
This dumb little fucker
is still in this house.
You're the one with no life,
and you're the one
who's a gutless loser!
Just like you
and your stupid new friends!
You good?
That was a bit harsh
at the end there.
I really deserved it.
So, yeah, fuck you,
Billy and Daryl --
-Billy's here!
-JACK: Let go of him!
GARY: Get your pissy hands
off me!
Get off of me!
BILLY: Move!
[ Laughs ]
GARY: What is this?
Ritual murder?
MILES: Looks like
a circle jerk to me.
BILLY: No, I'm not gonna
murder you, kid.
Just gonna break
all the other bones
in your shitty little body.
Sam, help us.
Yeah, Sam.
Have a heart.
We're so sorry.
You boys like to wrestle,
huh?
-[ Cracking ]
-Ow, my arm!
Let him go!
Don't worry. It's not real.
It's just wrestling.
Let go of us!
Sam, he's gonna break my fucking
arm. Help me out here!
You liked my moves,
didn't you, Sam?
You fucking asshole.
Hey, who wants to see Dallas
break this kid's fucking arm?
-CROWD: Yeah!
-No, no!
No, you don't.
Are you joking, man?
Come on!
No, man,
I'm not fucking doing that.
[ Chanting ] Dallas!
Dallas! Dallas!
GARY:
Stop! Stop! No.
-Stop!
-[ Chanting ] Dallas! Dallas!
No!
I'm not fucking doing that.
-Stop!
-You fucking coward!
I'll do it myself!
No, Billy, wait!
[ Energy resonates ]
Is that a-a fucking...
[ Energy resonates ]
Are you fucking kidding me?
Why are you acting like a bunch
of scared little kids?
It's just one of their stupid
fucking pranks!
No reason
to break up the party.
[ Creature growling ]
Aaah!
It's aliens!
[ Growling ]
Let's go!
[ Indistinct shouting
and screaming ]
Where's Sam?!
Sam!
Gary!
[ Screams ]
[ Growling ]
[ Screaming ]
[ Creature snarls ]
Fucking arms off me,
you alien fuck!
Shit!
Help!
Sam, help!
Sam!
Get off!
[ Indistinct shouting ]
Sam!
No!
Please stop!
Sam!
-[ Creature growling ]
-[ Screaming ]
Please go away!
[ Indistinct shouting ]
Gary.
[ Dramatic music plays ]
Gary?
Gary?
Gary!
Hey, do you know where
they took my brother?
Please, help me.
Please, we have to do something.
[ Retching ]
They took them to the water.
God damn it.
I'm coming for you guys.
[ Dramatic music plays ]
[ Gasping ]
[ Grunting ]
Gary.
Gary?
[ Creature growling ]
Gary?!
Gary?!
[ Creature growling ]
[ Creature growling ]
Gary?!
Gary?
[ Gasps ]
[ Creatures growling ]
[ Gasps ]
[ Blade sings ]
TRISH: Help me!
Billy, please, help me!
[ Screaming ]
[ Creatures growling ]
Billy, help me!
Help, Billy!
Billy, please, help me!
[ Screaming ]
Please, Billy, help me!
-What do you want me to do?!
-I'm scared!
Just get a fucking grip, man!
You got to fucking do something!
Get the fuck off
and stop fucking talking!
I don't want to die!
[ Screaming and crying ]
[ Creatures roaring ]
[ Screaming ]
[ Muffled screaming ]
Trish.
-[ Roars ]
-No, no!
What the fuck are you doing?!
Fuck you!
I fucking always had your back!
Son of a bitch!
No!
What the fuck?!
Get the fuck off of me!
Where are you taking me?!
Guys!
Come on, this is our chance!
-Not happening!
-Get off him!
[ Creature roaring ]
Gary.
MILES: Gary!
GARY:
Your hands taste like shit!
Ow!
Guys, guys, guys!
BILLY: Bye, loser!
Can't wait to watch you die!
Guys, guys, guys!
Help!
Guys, help!
I'm not ready to die yet!
Please, help!
[ Roars ]
No!
No! What the fuck?!
What is this shit?!
Billy, you fucking piece
of shit!
Where the fuck am I?
What are you gonna do to me?
Who the fuck are you?
What do you want from me?
Fuck.
Just let me go.
Somebody help me!
Holy shit!
You're sick, man!
Listen, my dad's a doctor, okay?
I'll take you to him.
He can help you.
All right? Just let me go.
No.
Don't put that shit on me.
Fuck off. No.
Get that shit away.
No! No!
No!
No!
Get it off me!
[ Groans ]
[ Cracking ]
[ Roars ]
GARY: Guys, I can't move.
Help!
You've got garbage breath!
Watch your friend die.
Watch your fucking friend die.
No!
Billy, let go of them,
you fucking asshole!
-BILLY: Say it!
-MILES: I'm so sorry!
BILLY: Say it!
Say you're sorry!
No, stop!
Sam!
Shh. Shh.
[ Growls ]
Sam, hurry!
-Yeah!
-Holy shit!
GARY:
Get the fuck off me!
-[ Roars ]
-Sam, look out!
Fuck yeah!
You fucking murderized
them all.
Where did you get
the crazy sword?
I stole it off a dead body.
Whoa. Sick.
Where's Billy?
Shit.
I can't see a fucking thing.
Fuck do I get out of here?
[ Growling ]
Dallas?
Dallas?
Holy fuck, buddy,
is that you?
Dallas?
What the fuck
did they do to you?
-[ Roars ]
-Aah!
-Fuck!
-[ Roars ]
[ Creatures growling ]
Holy shit!
Go that way!
That way!
Go!
[ Dramatic music playing ]
Billy?
Hey, no, that's my gear!
See you, fuckers.
I hope a shark bites out your
fucking throat, you coward!
[ Creatures growling ]
Guys, we need to go.
Take this. Swim as fast
as you can. Don't turn back.
Guys, I don't think
I can do this.
It doesn't matter.
We have to.
[ Roars ]
Where's Jack?!
I don't know.
Where's Sam?
Where are you guys?
[ Creature growls ]
[ Muffled screaming ]
Sam!
Sam!
Sam!
Get to the dock.
Quickly.
MILES: Okay.
Come on, Gary!
Come on.
Oh, my God.
Come on, I have to go back!
We can't. Those fucking aliens
will get us.
But she went out there
to save us.
Listen, if we go back,
we're screwed.
But it's my fault
that they're dead anyways!
I was such a dick!
Listen, man,
we were just kids being kids.
We're allowed to be
pieces of shit sometimes.
My parents were never there
for me, but Sam always was.
And now my best friend and my
only sister are fucking dead!
We have to go back.
I'm coming with you.
All right.
Count of three.
Three, two...
I got him!
Sam!
Sam, you're okay!
MILES: Jack!
We got to fucking go!
They're coming!
He's not breathing!
Flashlight.
GARY: Sam.
Sam, he's not breathing.
I know that, Gary.
I know that.
-GARY: Come on.
-MILES: Oh, my God.
Is he dead?
-Fuck, fuck, fuck.
-GARY: Come on.
Jack, please.
Wake up.
Wake the fuck up, man!
Come on, Jack.
Jack, okay, don't die on us.
[ Creatures growling ]
GARY: Jack, they're coming!
Here they come!
Fuck.
Come on.
GARY: Come on,
they're here!
MILES:
Fuck, don't stop!
Come on, fuck!
Wake up, Jack!
Breathe!
Fucking breathe!
SAM:
Fucking breathe!
Come on, Jack!
[ Coughing ]
Jack, you're alive!
-Jack, you're alive.
-I'm alive?
-Go! Run!
-Oh, fuck! Go!
-Go!
-Run, run!
Come on, we got to go!
Come on, open the door!
It's not opening!
It's locked!
Sam, why is the door locked?
Fucking right, it's locked.
Everything is locked.
None of you fucks
are getting in.
Open the fucking door!
It's our house!
It's mine now.
Billy, why are you
doing this to us?
Because you guys are a bunch
of fucking losers,
and no one's gonna give a fuck
if you guys disappear.
Fuck you, Billy!
You're a piece
of fucking garbage,
and you're the one who has
the shrimp dick!
[ Dallas roaring ]
Guys?
You guys remember Dallas.
Ooh, he's looking
pretty sharp.
[ Snarling ]
-[ Roars ]
-Go!
Go!
Fuck!
Fuck off, Dallas!
[ Roaring ]
[ Panting ]
SAM: Come on!
Get to the woods!
Come on!
-Go!
-Right behind you!
[ Energy resonates ]
Fuck! Fuck.
Fuck.
-[ Roars ]
-Fuck!
[ Screaming ]
Fuck! Fuck!
What the fuck?!
My fucking car!
What the fuck?!
[ Roaring ]
You always were
such a fucking idiot!
[ Roaring ]
Fuck!
[ Roars ]
They're following us!
Don't let them catch you!
Bike faster!
I don't think
we can outbike this.
Follow me!
[ Creatures growling ]
Follow me!
[ All panting ]
Get down, get down.
[ Panting ]
Shh!
Guys, stay quiet.
[ Growling continues ]
[ Dramatic music playing ]
[ Growling fades ]
What?
Where'd they go?
I don't know.
Did they finally leave?
MILES:
I hope so.
You guys okay?
I've never been this cold
in my life.
Whoa, whoa.
Miles, deep breaths, okay?
We're gonna be all right.
I think the aliens
were using human skin
to fuel their spaceship.
I don't want my body
to be alien fuel.
I'm never gonna see
my mom again, am I?
We're gonna get through this
together. All right, buddy?
Uh, Sam...
I'm sorry for being such a piece
of shit to you all this time.
You were always there for me,
even when
our own parents weren't.
And I just didn't
want you to leave.
Hey, Gary.
Gary.
I'm your sister.
I'm not going anywhere.
-I love you, okay?
-I love you too.
Okay.
So, what do we do now?
I mean, someone must have seen
what just happened here.
Just stay put
and wait for help.
-[ Energy resonates ]
-[ All screaming ]
-[ Creatures growling ]
-GARY: Go!
Go! Run!
Run to the barn!
-[ Blade plunges ]
-[ Roars ]
What do you want?!
Stay the fuck away from us!
[ Energy resonates ]
You want to dance?
Let's go!
[ Shrieking ]
Aah!
Enjoy the view.
GARY: Sam!
Sam, come on!
[ All panting ]
Close the door.
-Did we lose them?
-I fucking hope so.
Okay, let's just
find a place to hide.
Let's go.
Hey!
Hey, let go of her!
Get the fuck
out of my hiding spot.
What's your problem, Billy?
Let her go.
JACK:
Yeah, let her go.
GARY: Billy, get your hands
off my sister.
She saved all of our lives,
including yours.
She saved me?
No.
I saved her.
Gave her a chance
to be popular.
Treated her like a queen,
and what did she do?
She threw the worst party ever,
and now we're all going to die!
Billy, I swear to fucking God,
let her go!
Billy, don't.
Shut up!
This is
your last fucking chance.
Let her go now!
Be quiet.
He'll hear you.
Who?
So your best friend
is still trying to kill you?
Okay.
How about this?
You let her go right now,
maybe I won't scream so loud
that Dallas will be here
in a couple seconds!
-Shut your mouth!
-No!
You shut
your shitty-ass mouth!
Yeah, I'm tired of hearing
and smelling shit
coming out of your face hole!
What?
-You heard me!
-Yeah!
Fine, fine, fine.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'll just kill
your fucking sister!
You're a psycho, Billy!
Night-night, Billy.
Yeah!
Die, Billy!
Suck crystal!
-MILES: Go, Jack!
-GARY: Fuck you!
Let's feed him to Dallas!
Oh!
[ Coughing ]
Aah!
-[ Grunts ]
-[ Blade plunges ]
No!
Oh, fuck.
Jack!
You fucking monster!
Jack!
You.
Billy, what did you do?
It's not my fault, Sam.
You made me do this.
I didn't make you do this.
I didn't make you do anything!
You did this!
I said shut the fuck up
or he'll hear you!
[ Energy resonates ]
[ Growling ]
[ Growling ] Billy.
Billy.
Oh, shit, it's Dallas.
[ Roaring ] Billy!
Let's go!
Go, go, go, go, go!
-Come on!
-No, where the fuck you going?
Slow the fuck down!
The attic.
Let's go.
-Okay.
-I'm gonna fucking kill you!
Fuck you,
you fucking maniac.
[ Coughs ]
Ah!
Broke my fucking nose.
[ Roars ]
[ Creatures growling ]
Holy shit!
Go, go, go!
Gary, they're coming!
GARY: Why won't these fucking
aliens leave us alone?!
[ Gasps ]
Dallas.
Look, I fucked up.
I was scared.
I know you're still
in there, bro.
I know you're still my buddy.
So fucking fight it, man.
Fucking fight it!
-[ Roars ]
-Aaaaaah!
[ Snarling ]
[ Dramatic music playing ]
Hurry the fuck up!
What the fuck?
Oh, my God.
Oh, Jack.
[ Roaring ]
Oh, my God!
Gary, look out!
Hey, Dallas.
[ Screams ]
Come on, I never did anything
to you.
Please, I'm sorry!
Please!
-[ Blade slices ]
-[ Roars ]
Holy shit!
Sam, be careful!
Watch out!
Oh, fuck.
Dropkick.
Sam, do the dropkick!
Sorry, Dallas.
Aah!
-Aah!
-Gary!
[ Grunting ]
Don't let go, Gary!
I'm holding on!
Hold on, Gary!
I'm slipping!
I'm slipping!
No, you're fucking not!
Hold on to my hand!
Aaah!
No!
No, Gary!
Gary, hold on!
Hold on!
Sam, help!
Sam!
Help!
Somebody help us!
Please, help!
Help us!
Please!
Holy shit!
What are we gonna do?
[ Weakly ] Grand finale.
What?
The grand finale.
Send those aliens to hell,
and tell them Jack sent them.
You're a fucking genius, buddy.
Don't die on me!
[ Music continues ]
[ Engine starts ]
Fuck space.
Holy shit!
Aaah!
Help!
Help us!
Please!
Grand finale.
Holy shit!
You did it, Jack.
Sam, catch!
I told you I kick ass
with a sword.
Whoa!
Jack!
-Jack, are you okay?
-Is he all right?
MILES: Barely.
SAM: Hey, Jack.
Hey, buddy.
Hey, Jack.
Jack, hey.
What happened?
Where am I?
There was just
a little accident.
But you're in our clubhouse.
You're gonna be fine.
We're gonna get you some help,
okay?
What happened to the aliens?
Blew them up.
It was fucking awesome.
Come on.
Help me get him up.
Come on, Jack.
Stay with us, Jack.
-Sam...
-Stop, stop.
Hey, Jack, what is it?
Will you protect the crystal?
With my life, buddy.
You're the coolest.
Jack, Jack.
Wake up.
Come on!
Stay with us, Jack.
Come on.
GARY:
Jack. Jack, Jack!
MILES: Come on, Jack.
Stay with us.
Jack, come on.
Come on, Jack.
Come on.
Jack.
Jack.
Come on, Jack.
Come on!
Come on, Jack.
[ Creatures growling ]
Shit, shit, shit!
Shit, why now?!
Give us
a fucking break already!
[ Guns cocking ]
[ Gunfire ]
We got kids.
Bag them.
They're fucking here.
Our friend is dying.
You got to help us.
Please help --
[ Screaming ]
Sam, no!
Get it off me!
[ Ominous music plays ]
Take it away.
[ Up-tempo music plays ]
[ Electronic music blaring ]
[ Music fades ]
[ Door rattles ]
[ Glass shatters ]
[ Footsteps ]
[ Growls ]
DAD: Oh, my God.
Family portrait is ruined.
I mean, what happened here?
MOM: Did they have
a party here?
DAD:
You got to be kidding me.
They turned our house
into a shithole?
MOM: Sam, how could you
let this happen?
DAD: This is gonna cost
a fortune to fix!
MOM:
Where's Gary?
-DAD: I'm so...
-[ Knocking on door ]
-MOM: Samantha!
-DAD: ...angry!
I don't even know where --
I can't believe
we trusted them!
You're the one who wanted
to have them! Ohh!
-Is that thing on?
-You've got to be kidding me!
I mean, our place is fucked!
Gary, if this has
something to do with your movie,
I'm gonna ground you
and your sister
for the rest of your lives.
These damn kids don't deserve
parents like us.
-[ Growling ]
-[ Screaming ]
DAD:
What's happening?!
[ Roaring ]
[ Down-tempo music plays ]
How much longer
till we go home?
Captain decides
when we go home!
Can you go ask him?
Jesus Christ!
No one's gonna ask the captain
what time they can go home!
Got it, kid?
Jesus.
Empty.
Got to soak them again, Cap!
Gonna be a long one tonight,
boys.
[ Energy resonates ]
Mother of Jesus.
-What the fuck?
-Jesus, Mary, and Joseph.
What the fuck's that?
Get the fuck down!
Fuck!
You boys all right?
What the fuck was that?!
I don't know.
[ Dramatic music plays ]
What do you think it is?
I don't think it's a plane.
I don't think
we should be here.
Boys, we're -- we're getting
out of here.
[ Underwater bellowing ]
-MAN: Aaah!
-Bruce!
Bruce!
Bruce!
Bruce!
Bruce!
-Bruce!
-[ Water sloshes ]
Aah!
CAPTAIN: Jimmy!
Jimmy!
J-Jimmy!
J-Jimmy?
Jim?
Who's out there?!
[ Creature growling ]
[ Water splashes ]
[ Up-tempo rock music plays ]
GARY:
There's Dinos dead ahead!
Fire the laser cannon!
-Yeah!
-Yeah!
[ Coughing ]
There's Dinos dead ahead.
-Let's teach them how to die.
-You'll die this time!
This Dino spine is mine!
Aaaaah!
Let's go berserk!
Yeah!
GARY:
Your Dino treachery ends here!
No! No!
[ Grunting ]
Stop! Stop it!
Stop! Stop!
[ Electricity crackling ]
[ Grunting ]
-[ Electricity crackling ]
-[ Screaming ]
It's the Dino Sorcerer.
Prepare to die,
you human fleshbags!
-Eat him alive!
-Yeah!
[ Chain saw buzzing ]
Do a dropkick!
Aaah!
Yeah!
Ha ha!
Your space magic
doesn't scare me.
Then clearly
you don't understand
the true power
of the crystal.
Give me the crystal!
Never!
You should have stayed extinct.
DINO: Shit.
Gary, this is stupid.
GARY: What?
What are you talking about?
Yeah.
What's wrong?
This is so -- like...
I got to shoot him in the head?
That's it?
Why does he get a sword
and I don't?
GARY: Well, first of all,
you have a gun, stupid.
Guns are better than swords.
And, two, you're a girl.
You don't use swords.
Um, that's not true.
Girls totally use swords.
I kick ass with a sword.
Well, guess what.
One, I don't care.
Two, I'm the director, so that's
just how it's going to be.
And three, we need to get
the shot before it gets dark.
So come on.
Let's shoot this thing.
Okay. Action!
You should have stayed extinct.
[ Bottle shatters ]
Holy shit.
Are you okay?
Ow!
What the fuck?
Who threw a beer bottle
at me?!
BILLY: I did.
You little piss trap.
This would be a great place
to party.
Oh, fucking teenagers.
I always thought
this place was abandoned.
-It's Billy McDougal! Run!
-Holy shit.
[ Indistinct shouting ]
Guys, guys!
Are you fucking serious?
You ruined the fucking movie!
Get out of our clubhouse,
and stop smoking in here.
This place is a fucking dump.
I'm gonna put this clown
to sleep.
No, Miles, don't.
GARY:
Yeah, kick his ass!
Yeah, smile when I knock
your fucking mouth out.
GARY: Get him!
BILLY: Hey, whoa, whoa.
Oh!
Stop!
Stop it!
-MILES: Fuck off!
-SAM: Leave him alone.
MILES: [ Grunting ]
I'm serious.
Knock it off.
Fuck off, man.
I said knock it off!
Fuck, man.
MILES: Get the fuck off me!
Jesus.
Hey, please use
your brain next time.
-You good, man?
-Yeah, I'm fine.
Hey, haven't I seen you
at school before?
Oh, come on.
You have.
Yeah.
Pretty girl like you.
How could I not?
Why the fuck are you hanging out
with these losers anyway?
Um, well, he's my brother,
those are his friends,
and they're not losers.
Okay?
TRISH: Um [Chuckles]
Why don't you have friends
your own age?
I do.
I'm just babysitting them.
[ Scoffs ]
Babysitting?
You wanted to be
in our movie, didn't you?
-[ Whispering ] Stop it.
-Why are you telling me to stop?
-Please.
-You got a boyfriend, Sam?
No.
You fucking anybody?
[ Scoffs ]
Stop.
Gross.
[ Laughs ]
She's not your type, Billy.
She's still a kid.
Look at how she dresses.
Sam's way cooler than you,
you troglodytes.
What's a troglodyte?
Oh, it's like a --
like a caveman.
It's calling them, like,
underdeveloped, stupid.
-That's you guys.
-Why the fuck are we still here?
This shit is lame.
Let's dip.
GARY:
Yeah, run away.
I hope to see you around,
Sam.
They're lucky I didn't leave
them in a pile of blood.
Yeah, those guys
are assholes.
Yeah,
they weren't very nice.
GARY: Come on, Jack.
Say something meaner.
JACK:
They were dumb.
BROADCASTER: Divers are still
searching for three fishermen
whose boat was found adrift
earlier this week.
Many people reported
seeing a fiery object
fall from the sky
that same evening.
It is unknown
if the two events are related,
but police are asking for
any witnesses to come forward.
In other news, Halloween
is only two days away.
Do you know what costume
you'll be wearing?
Coming up,
we've got some great ideas.
[ Cellphone chimes ]
[ Knock on door ]
GARY: Sam, why do you always
lock your door?
Sam, I know you're in there.
Are you coming out to wrestle
or not?
Not right now.
What?
Come on. Why not?
We need you.
Because I don't
feel like it.
Come on.
We need you
for this movie.
I thought you were gonna be
my tag-team partner.
Come on.
Why not?
Gary, I have homework.
[ Cellphone chimes ]
[ Playing mid-tempo music ]
Just shoot it without me.
And don't do anything
that'll get me in trouble.
Fine.
Be like that!
You wanted me,
and I didn't see it
Now I'm so lost without you
Get off me, dummy!
GARY: Nice.
Where's Sam?
Uh, she needed
to do homework.
What the fuck?
Why would she want a main role
in the movie
if she's not gonna be in it?
Yeah, I know.
I thought the exact same thing.
It's kind of weird.
She's never ditched us before.
Jack, here are the glow sticks
you wanted.
Sweet. Thanks.
What are you even doing?
I already told you.
I'm working on the grand finale
for the movie,
and it's going to be glorious.
Sure.
Yeah, just, um, don't blow
anything up, please.
No promises.
Wait.
So she totally ditched us
for homework.
Yeah.
Well, guess what.
Sucks to be her
because she won't get to film
the best movie ever.
Let's film this fucking thing.
It's pandemonium here
as one half of the Berserkers
faces off against
the treacherous Dino Sorcerer.
A match that's been
65 million years in the making.
-Now let's rumble!
-[ Bell dings ]
DINO:
My kind was frozen in the dirt
until the souls of your
ancestors brought us back!
I can't believe it!
The Dino Sorcerer has brought
the Berserker to his knees.
[ Roars ]
[ Grunting ]
Holy smokes, folks!
We're watching history
rewrite itself.
Just because my tag-team partner
isn't willing to help me
because they have homework,
that doesn't mean
that I'm not ready
to fight anything and anyone
in this shithole universe
to protect my Planet Earth.
[ Roars ]
The Dino Sorcerer is hurt.
The fate of the planet
comes down to this very moment.
I'm unstoppable!
Oh, fuck!
[ Groaning ]
My arm!
I broke it!
Go get my sister!
Go, go!
Jack, go!
Don't be a wuss, man.
You don't be a fucking dumbass!
Get off my arm!
-[ Shrieking ]
-It's not my fault!
Fuck, fuck, fuck!
Mom and Dad are gonna piss!
I just broke my arm.
Can you stop yelling at me
for fucking second?
SAM:
I didn't want to bike
to the fucking hospital today,
you moron!
GARY: Too fucking bad!
I broke my arm!
God.
Sam, this looks so cool!
It's like glow-in-the-dark
and everything.
Why do you look like that?
Like what?
Like that.
It looks stupid.
Gary, you fell off a ladder.
At least I was doing something
for the movie.
You really picked
an inconvenient time
to break your arm, honey.
It's not like I planned it.
Well, maybe next time
you should.
Your father and I
have a flight tonight.
But you just got back.
We'll only be gone
a couple of days.
And you got your big sister
to take care of you.
No way.
No, I was gonna go out
for Halloween.
Oh, honey, you look...
different.
-Yeah. See?
-No, I don't.
-You look different.
-I literally don't.
-Yes, you do.
-DAD: I know it's important.
I'm just dealing
with some family shit.
MOM: I'm sure you'll have
a nice Halloween together.
DAD: They're there now.
Okay. Yeah.
We're on our way.
Hey, bud, we have to head off
to the airport, okay?
You're good to get home
with Sam, right?
I mean,
yeah, sure, I can bike.
Great. By Gary.
We love you.
Outside.
What?
What did I do?
You're in trouble!
-[ Metal clangs ]
-Ow!
This isn't fair.
Look, we put our trust in you
to be the responsible one.
You bought him the ring.
You were supposed to be
in charge.
I thought that meant
something to you.
No phone,
no friends over.
Is Gary allowed to have friends
over there?
Gary's punishment
is having a broken arm.
-Are you serious right now?
-We've got to go.
No, no, no. I will not be stuck
at home with Gary.
-You've got the cats.
-We don't have any cats.
If you ever want one,
I will buy you one.
Just keep an eye
on your brother, okay?
If we die, he's all you've got.
See you when we get back.
[ Sighing ]
TRISH: What the fuck
are we doing for Halloween?
I don't know.
I haven't heard shit.
I just want to get fucked up
and do some fucked-up shit.
Billy, what are we doing?
-Billy?
-Billy.
I'm working on something.
[ Mockingly ] Working on
something.
-[ Helicopter blades whirring ]
-[ Police radio chatter ]
MAN:
Going for another pass.
Situation 14-9 confirmed.
We have the location
and remains of the fishermen.
Do we have eyes on the target?
Negative.
Orders are
to immediately detain
the suspect who was reported,
and the site is to be sealed
and cleared.
Copy.
GARY: All right.
Action!
Aaaah!
Your Dino treachery
ends here.
DINO: Surrender your
earthly flesh!
You'll never take my skin!
GARY:
And now dropkick him!
What?
I-I can't do that.
GARY: Uh, just try it.
Come on.
But Sam's
the dropkick expert.
Eh, forget Sam.
We need more dropkicks.
-Come on, do it!
-Come on, kick me!
-GARY: Yeah, screw Sam!
-All right. You're the boss.
Sorry.
I told you.
Uh, just do the line!
Give me the crystal!
Yeah, now scream it
this time!
-Give me the crystal!
-Car!
What the fuck?!
Guys!
-You guys okay?
-Yeah.
What are you doing here?!
I'm here to see your sister.
-Dude!
-What the hell?!
Guys, you know
what this means?
He's gonna make you
an uncle.
Gross.
No.
This means war.
Billy.
Hey.
Hi. I didn't know
you were coming over.
Yeah, you said
your parents were gone,
so I thought it'd be cool
to come over.
Nice place.
This place
is fucking perfect.
Yep.
This is my house.
Jeez.
Parents must be rich.
[ Chuckles ]
They should be.
I mean,
they work all the time, so...
Yeah.
So you gonna show me around,
or what?
No.
Is this your room?
Yes, but, oh, my gosh,
close your eyes.
-It's a disaster.
-No, it's not.
Whoa.
This is cool.
Kr-kr-kr.
Yeah.
Got a lot of neat stuff.
-What is this?
-Oh, my God, no.
It's just something
I was, like, working on.
I thought maybe I'd, like, wear
it for Halloween or something.
Oh.
I think it'd look
very cute on you.
Who is she?
That is Valora.
She's my favorite wrestler.
She's cool.
She stands for, like,
strength and bravery
and never surrendering
to your enemies.
Always kicking ass.
Cool.
I used to be into wrestling
when I was kid.
Think you could take me?
You?
No problem.
All right, go easy on me.
Oh!
You like my moves?
All right, yeah.
Can I show you mine?
Do you really think
I'm pretty?
I think you're beautiful.
GARY:
They're in here.
Okay.
You guys ready to make these
guys wish they were never born?
What do you think
they're doing?
Sucking and fucking,
for sure.
Well, suck time...is over.
Holy shit.
I know.
-[ Electronic music blares ]
-[ Indistinct shouting ]
This is for the beer bottle,
you creep!
[ Indistinct shouting ]
BILLY:
Aah! Fuck!
SAM: Get out!
MILES: You asshole!
Fuck you up!
You are fucking dead!
Ow!
You missed me,
you little fuck!
Oh, my God.
I'm sorry, Sam.
-[ Energy resonates ]
-[ Music stops ]
[ All groan ]
What the hell?
What was that?
-Quit breathing on me.
-Shut the fuck up!
Gary, what the fuck
did you do?
That wasn't me.
Gary, I am so sick
of being responsible
for all the stupid shit
that you do.
Grow up,
stop being such a loser,
and stay out of
my fucking life.
-And get of my room!
-Get your hands off!
[ Boys groaning ]
Fuck you, Sam!
I don't want to be
in your shit life anyway!
Stay out of mine!
No, Billy, what are you --
ow!
-Ow!
-Get the fuck out of here
before I rip
your fucking shrimp dicks off!
Well, guess what.
If you even touch our shrimp
dicks, you'll go to jail!
Fucking pervert!
Screw you, Billy.
Gone.
[ Both laugh ]
MILES:
Man, Sam's changed.
JACK: Hey, guys, what do
you think that light was?
-It really freaked me out.
-I don't know.
It sounded like a -- whaa! --
or something like that.
I don't know.
Hey, Gary, you all right?
I fucking hate that guy.
He ruins everything.
Fucking hate that guy too.
Right? He ruins everything.
He's annoying.
Hey, guys, look.
[ Energy resonating ]
GARY: That must be where
it's coming from.
Wait, guys,
we don't know what that is.
Don't be a chickenshit.
Come on.
GARY: Whoa!
Look at that.
MILES: Looks like something
out of a movie or something.
-GARY: Yeah.
-JACK: Hey, don't go near it.
-GARY: Why?
-MILES: Yeah, why?
JACK: Well, what if that light
and sound was a ship exploding,
and this is poisonous gas
from whatever blew it up?
Like napalm gas?
Yeah. Or something from space,
like aliens or something.
You're just being paranoid.
GARY:
Why'd it turn off?
Guys, we're gonna tell Sam
about this, right?
No.
Fuck Sam.
Yeah. I'd rather go
punch myself in the dick.
Anyone else hungry?
Let's go chew something.
Yeah.
There's something weird
going on around here.
Wait.
Hey, guys, wait up.
[ Creature snarling ]
[ Grunts softly ]
Crystal.
We need the crystal.
Aah!
Something's got me!
Help!
-Yaah!
-Yaah!
Billy and his prick friends
are hanging out with Sam
in my backyard.
Let's go spy on them.
-Fuck yeah! Let's go!
-Yeah!
Haven't seen your brother
and those little creeps around.
Yeah.
It's kind of nice.
Yeah, that little shit must have
finally learned his lesson.
Are we partying tonight,
or what?
I don't know yet.
Great. Another boring Halloween
in this shithole town.
Yeah, well,
whatever you're doing
is better
than what I have to do.
I have to take care
of my little brother.
Yeah.
No, thanks.
Well, shit.
We got to do something.
We should have a party.
Yeah, you guys
should totally do that.
We should party
in that old shitty barn.
BILLY: No, the place is filled
with little kids' shit.
We should have it here.
What?
Well, yeah.
That way, you can go.
[ Chuckles ] Yeah, right,
that's not happening.
Why not?
I'm sure you have a costume.
Yeah, she does.
And it is very fucking cute.
How about that?
Why not?
Um, because my parents
will kill me.
Fuck parents, man.
Who cares what they think?
You should just
do what you want.
Hold on.
What if
we just call your parents
and ask them
if we can have the party here?
Problem solved.
Think about
what you just said.
Sounds good, man.
TRISH: [ Laughing ]
Fuck you, Billy!
Fucking freezing out here!
Holy fuck!
It's just water, you pussy.
Fuck you guys!
You're fucking drenched, bud.
[ Laughs ]
Hey, we'll keep it small,
and your parents won't find out.
I promise.
Billy.
-I don't know.
-Come on.
I want to show you off
to everyone at school.
I want them to meet
my new girlfriend.
Really?
And my parents won't find out?
I swear on your life.
Okay.
Really?
Let's have a party.
We're having a party.
[ Laughter ]
Party! Whoo!
Sam.
[ Laughing ]
Ha ha!
All right, boys.
Tonight we inflict
maximum vengeance.
MILES: Come on.
GARY: Miles!
TRISH: Ahh!
[ Electronic music blaring ]
Happy fucking Halloween!
[ People cheering ]
GIRL: Sam?
Sam!
Hey! What are you doing here?
I never see you at parties.
No, my party.
This is my house.
Have you seen, Billy?
This is your house?
Holy shit!
Yeah, my parents
would kill me.
I mean, sometimes you just have
to, like, do what you want.
-You know?
-Yeah, totally.
Wouldn't be letting people paint
on my walls, though, you know?
What?
Sorry.
Excuse me.
Whoo!
Dallas,
what the hell are you doing?
What? Billy said you were
cool with it.
Would you do this
to your parents' house?
Billy, what the fuck?
People can't smoke in here.
Hey.
What's wrong?
Billy, this is seriously crazy.
You said this was gonna be
a small party.
This is out of control. You have
to help me do something.
Look, Sam, people are having
a good time.
That's what's important.
But the house
is getting destroyed.
Okay.
Your parents are very rich.
They can just fix it all.
Billy, help me.
My parents
are gonna murder me.
[ Retching ]
Okay.
-Party's over.
-Come on, just let it go.
-What do you mean, let it go?
-Just chill the fuck out.
You can't make
all these people leave now.
-It's my house.
-Yeah, well, it's my party.
Billy, is that your girlfriend
or something?
No, man. She's just
the keys to the house.
Okay, people, party's over.
Safe drive.
Actually, don't drive, please.
Bye.
-Get out.
-Sam!
What the fuck are you doing?
Billy, stop.
You're hurting me.
You said
we could have a party,
and that's what we're gonna
fucking do.
Do you understand me?
You scaring me.
Good.
Party's back on.
Let's tear this place apart!
Whoo!
Go fucking break something.
They're gonna regret
trashing my house.
Fucking teenagers.
What is that costume even
supposed to be?
Bro, what's up
with your house?
It's being destroyed.
We know you didn't get any
candy, so we got you covered.
Okay, what's the mission status,
captain?
Just hooked up the drone, and
I'm locking down on the enemy.
What do you think
he's going to do?
Something stupid.
How do you know?
Because it's Billy.
He's bound to do something
stupid.
What a stupid idiot.
Move.
Get the fuck out of my way.
Get the fuck out of my way.
Nice costume, bitch.
Get the fuck out.
I need to piss.
Come on, my dick's full!
TRISH: Hey, Billy.
There's a better bathroom
in here.
God is good.
Holy shit.
Is that Sam's room?
I can't hear
what they're saying.
Shh.
Be quiet and you listen.
Take it out, Billy.
Trish, I got to piss.
Then do it.
If you'll let me hold it.
You are so fucking weird,
Trish.
Is that suck time?
That's not suck time.
Boys, we just hit
the mother lode.
TRISH: [ Laughing ]
Sorry, Jack, you shouldn't
be seeing this.
Fuck my life.
JACK: Listen up, all you
scumbags and scumballs.
Now, pay attention to the TV.
Hit 'em, Gary.
When I was a kid,
I thought I had
the coolest sister
in the world.
God, Gary,
what are you doing?
But I was wrong.
I mean, what happened
to you, Samantha?
You could have been tough.
You could have kicked ass
in the ring,
and you could have been
a legend.
But then you walked away.
You abandoned the ring...
Let's go!
You get that shit, Gary?!
Yeah!
...the fans, Jack, Miles.
You abandoned me
and all the respect you earned
for someone
who treats you like shit.
[ Laughing ]
Oh, my God, Trish,
Sam is such a fucking idiot.
We throw the best party
of the fucking year,
and then she tries
to kick everybody out.
She's such a fucking moron,
dude.
What did you expect?
She's not cool.
She hangs out
with little boys.
Yo, Billy.
Can't you see
I'm doing someone -- something?
Sam's little brother's
on TV talking shit
about you out there.
Come on, let's go.
Get the fuck up.
Get your clothes on. Let's go.
BILLY: Look, she fucking plays
with action figures
and is into wrestling.
It was so fucking hard
not to laugh
in her fucking face
when I found out.
TRISH:
Oh, my God.
Did you see
her costume tonight?
She looks like
a fucking child.
[ Laughter ]
Take it out, Billy.
BILLY:
Trish, I got to piss.
TRISH:
Then do it.
If you'll let me hold it.
BILLY: You are so fucking weird,
Trish.
TRISH: Oh!
[ Laughs ]
-BILLY: Get it everywhere.
-TRISH: I know! [ Laughs ]
Oh, my God.
GARY: That's the respect
you deserve
when you betray
your teammates.
Your boyfriend's pissing
all over your room.
This dumb little fucker
is still in this house.
You're the one with no life,
and you're the one
who's a gutless loser!
Just like you
and your stupid new friends!
You good?
That was a bit harsh
at the end there.
I really deserved it.
So, yeah, fuck you,
Billy and Daryl --
-Billy's here!
-JACK: Let go of him!
GARY: Get your pissy hands
off me!
Get off of me!
BILLY: Move!
[ Laughs ]
GARY: What is this?
Ritual murder?
MILES: Looks like
a circle jerk to me.
BILLY: No, I'm not gonna
murder you, kid.
Just gonna break
all the other bones
in your shitty little body.
Sam, help us.
Yeah, Sam.
Have a heart.
We're so sorry.
You boys like to wrestle,
huh?
-[ Cracking ]
-Ow, my arm!
Let him go!
Don't worry. It's not real.
It's just wrestling.
Let go of us!
Sam, he's gonna break my fucking
arm. Help me out here!
You liked my moves,
didn't you, Sam?
You fucking asshole.
Hey, who wants to see Dallas
break this kid's fucking arm?
-CROWD: Yeah!
-No, no!
No, you don't.
Are you joking, man?
Come on!
No, man,
I'm not fucking doing that.
[ Chanting ] Dallas!
Dallas! Dallas!
GARY:
Stop! Stop! No.
-Stop!
-[ Chanting ] Dallas! Dallas!
No!
I'm not fucking doing that.
-Stop!
-You fucking coward!
I'll do it myself!
No, Billy, wait!
[ Energy resonates ]
Is that a-a fucking...
[ Energy resonates ]
Are you fucking kidding me?
Why are you acting like a bunch
of scared little kids?
It's just one of their stupid
fucking pranks!
No reason
to break up the party.
[ Creature growling ]
Aaah!
It's aliens!
[ Growling ]
Let's go!
[ Indistinct shouting
and screaming ]
Where's Sam?!
Sam!
Gary!
[ Screams ]
[ Growling ]
[ Screaming ]
[ Creature snarls ]
Fucking arms off me,
you alien fuck!
Shit!
Help!
Sam, help!
Sam!
Get off!
[ Indistinct shouting ]
Sam!
No!
Please stop!
Sam!
-[ Creature growling ]
-[ Screaming ]
Please go away!
[ Indistinct shouting ]
Gary.
[ Dramatic music plays ]
Gary?
Gary?
Gary!
Hey, do you know where
they took my brother?
Please, help me.
Please, we have to do something.
[ Retching ]
They took them to the water.
God damn it.
I'm coming for you guys.
[ Dramatic music plays ]
[ Gasping ]
[ Grunting ]
Gary.
Gary?
[ Creature growling ]
Gary?!
Gary?!
[ Creature growling ]
[ Creature growling ]
Gary?!
Gary?
[ Gasps ]
[ Creatures growling ]
[ Gasps ]
[ Blade sings ]
TRISH: Help me!
Billy, please, help me!
[ Screaming ]
[ Creatures growling ]
Billy, help me!
Help, Billy!
Billy, please, help me!
[ Screaming ]
Please, Billy, help me!
-What do you want me to do?!
-I'm scared!
Just get a fucking grip, man!
You got to fucking do something!
Get the fuck off
and stop fucking talking!
I don't want to die!
[ Screaming and crying ]
[ Creatures roaring ]
[ Screaming ]
[ Muffled screaming ]
Trish.
-[ Roars ]
-No, no!
What the fuck are you doing?!
Fuck you!
I fucking always had your back!
Son of a bitch!
No!
What the fuck?!
Get the fuck off of me!
Where are you taking me?!
Guys!
Come on, this is our chance!
-Not happening!
-Get off him!
[ Creature roaring ]
Gary.
MILES: Gary!
GARY:
Your hands taste like shit!
Ow!
Guys, guys, guys!
BILLY: Bye, loser!
Can't wait to watch you die!
Guys, guys, guys!
Help!
Guys, help!
I'm not ready to die yet!
Please, help!
[ Roars ]
No!
No! What the fuck?!
What is this shit?!
Billy, you fucking piece
of shit!
Where the fuck am I?
What are you gonna do to me?
Who the fuck are you?
What do you want from me?
Fuck.
Just let me go.
Somebody help me!
Holy shit!
You're sick, man!
Listen, my dad's a doctor, okay?
I'll take you to him.
He can help you.
All right? Just let me go.
No.
Don't put that shit on me.
Fuck off. No.
Get that shit away.
No! No!
No!
No!
Get it off me!
[ Groans ]
[ Cracking ]
[ Roars ]
GARY: Guys, I can't move.
Help!
You've got garbage breath!
Watch your friend die.
Watch your fucking friend die.
No!
Billy, let go of them,
you fucking asshole!
-BILLY: Say it!
-MILES: I'm so sorry!
BILLY: Say it!
Say you're sorry!
No, stop!
Sam!
Shh. Shh.
[ Growls ]
Sam, hurry!
-Yeah!
-Holy shit!
GARY:
Get the fuck off me!
-[ Roars ]
-Sam, look out!
Fuck yeah!
You fucking murderized
them all.
Where did you get
the crazy sword?
I stole it off a dead body.
Whoa. Sick.
Where's Billy?
Shit.
I can't see a fucking thing.
Fuck do I get out of here?
[ Growling ]
Dallas?
Dallas?
Holy fuck, buddy,
is that you?
Dallas?
What the fuck
did they do to you?
-[ Roars ]
-Aah!
-Fuck!
-[ Roars ]
[ Creatures growling ]
Holy shit!
Go that way!
That way!
Go!
[ Dramatic music playing ]
Billy?
Hey, no, that's my gear!
See you, fuckers.
I hope a shark bites out your
fucking throat, you coward!
[ Creatures growling ]
Guys, we need to go.
Take this. Swim as fast
as you can. Don't turn back.
Guys, I don't think
I can do this.
It doesn't matter.
We have to.
[ Roars ]
Where's Jack?!
I don't know.
Where's Sam?
Where are you guys?
[ Creature growls ]
[ Muffled screaming ]
Sam!
Sam!
Sam!
Get to the dock.
Quickly.
MILES: Okay.
Come on, Gary!
Come on.
Oh, my God.
Come on, I have to go back!
We can't. Those fucking aliens
will get us.
But she went out there
to save us.
Listen, if we go back,
we're screwed.
But it's my fault
that they're dead anyways!
I was such a dick!
Listen, man,
we were just kids being kids.
We're allowed to be
pieces of shit sometimes.
My parents were never there
for me, but Sam always was.
And now my best friend and my
only sister are fucking dead!
We have to go back.
I'm coming with you.
All right.
Count of three.
Three, two...
I got him!
Sam!
Sam, you're okay!
MILES: Jack!
We got to fucking go!
They're coming!
He's not breathing!
Flashlight.
GARY: Sam.
Sam, he's not breathing.
I know that, Gary.
I know that.
-GARY: Come on.
-MILES: Oh, my God.
Is he dead?
-Fuck, fuck, fuck.
-GARY: Come on.
Jack, please.
Wake up.
Wake the fuck up, man!
Come on, Jack.
Jack, okay, don't die on us.
[ Creatures growling ]
GARY: Jack, they're coming!
Here they come!
Fuck.
Come on.
GARY: Come on,
they're here!
MILES:
Fuck, don't stop!
Come on, fuck!
Wake up, Jack!
Breathe!
Fucking breathe!
SAM:
Fucking breathe!
Come on, Jack!
[ Coughing ]
Jack, you're alive!
-Jack, you're alive.
-I'm alive?
-Go! Run!
-Oh, fuck! Go!
-Go!
-Run, run!
Come on, we got to go!
Come on, open the door!
It's not opening!
It's locked!
Sam, why is the door locked?
Fucking right, it's locked.
Everything is locked.
None of you fucks
are getting in.
Open the fucking door!
It's our house!
It's mine now.
Billy, why are you
doing this to us?
Because you guys are a bunch
of fucking losers,
and no one's gonna give a fuck
if you guys disappear.
Fuck you, Billy!
You're a piece
of fucking garbage,
and you're the one who has
the shrimp dick!
[ Dallas roaring ]
Guys?
You guys remember Dallas.
Ooh, he's looking
pretty sharp.
[ Snarling ]
-[ Roars ]
-Go!
Go!
Fuck!
Fuck off, Dallas!
[ Roaring ]
[ Panting ]
SAM: Come on!
Get to the woods!
Come on!
-Go!
-Right behind you!
[ Energy resonates ]
Fuck! Fuck.
Fuck.
-[ Roars ]
-Fuck!
[ Screaming ]
Fuck! Fuck!
What the fuck?!
My fucking car!
What the fuck?!
[ Roaring ]
You always were
such a fucking idiot!
[ Roaring ]
Fuck!
[ Roars ]
They're following us!
Don't let them catch you!
Bike faster!
I don't think
we can outbike this.
Follow me!
[ Creatures growling ]
Follow me!
[ All panting ]
Get down, get down.
[ Panting ]
Shh!
Guys, stay quiet.
[ Growling continues ]
[ Dramatic music playing ]
[ Growling fades ]
What?
Where'd they go?
I don't know.
Did they finally leave?
MILES:
I hope so.
You guys okay?
I've never been this cold
in my life.
Whoa, whoa.
Miles, deep breaths, okay?
We're gonna be all right.
I think the aliens
were using human skin
to fuel their spaceship.
I don't want my body
to be alien fuel.
I'm never gonna see
my mom again, am I?
We're gonna get through this
together. All right, buddy?
Uh, Sam...
I'm sorry for being such a piece
of shit to you all this time.
You were always there for me,
even when
our own parents weren't.
And I just didn't
want you to leave.
Hey, Gary.
Gary.
I'm your sister.
I'm not going anywhere.
-I love you, okay?
-I love you too.
Okay.
So, what do we do now?
I mean, someone must have seen
what just happened here.
Just stay put
and wait for help.
-[ Energy resonates ]
-[ All screaming ]
-[ Creatures growling ]
-GARY: Go!
Go! Run!
Run to the barn!
-[ Blade plunges ]
-[ Roars ]
What do you want?!
Stay the fuck away from us!
[ Energy resonates ]
You want to dance?
Let's go!
[ Shrieking ]
Aah!
Enjoy the view.
GARY: Sam!
Sam, come on!
[ All panting ]
Close the door.
-Did we lose them?
-I fucking hope so.
Okay, let's just
find a place to hide.
Let's go.
Hey!
Hey, let go of her!
Get the fuck
out of my hiding spot.
What's your problem, Billy?
Let her go.
JACK:
Yeah, let her go.
GARY: Billy, get your hands
off my sister.
She saved all of our lives,
including yours.
She saved me?
No.
I saved her.
Gave her a chance
to be popular.
Treated her like a queen,
and what did she do?
She threw the worst party ever,
and now we're all going to die!
Billy, I swear to fucking God,
let her go!
Billy, don't.
Shut up!
This is
your last fucking chance.
Let her go now!
Be quiet.
He'll hear you.
Who?
So your best friend
is still trying to kill you?
Okay.
How about this?
You let her go right now,
maybe I won't scream so loud
that Dallas will be here
in a couple seconds!
-Shut your mouth!
-No!
You shut
your shitty-ass mouth!
Yeah, I'm tired of hearing
and smelling shit
coming out of your face hole!
What?
-You heard me!
-Yeah!
Fine, fine, fine.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'll just kill
your fucking sister!
You're a psycho, Billy!
Night-night, Billy.
Yeah!
Die, Billy!
Suck crystal!
-MILES: Go, Jack!
-GARY: Fuck you!
Let's feed him to Dallas!
Oh!
[ Coughing ]
Aah!
-[ Grunts ]
-[ Blade plunges ]
No!
Oh, fuck.
Jack!
You fucking monster!
Jack!
You.
Billy, what did you do?
It's not my fault, Sam.
You made me do this.
I didn't make you do this.
I didn't make you do anything!
You did this!
I said shut the fuck up
or he'll hear you!
[ Energy resonates ]
[ Growling ]
[ Growling ] Billy.
Billy.
Oh, shit, it's Dallas.
[ Roaring ] Billy!
Let's go!
Go, go, go, go, go!
-Come on!
-No, where the fuck you going?
Slow the fuck down!
The attic.
Let's go.
-Okay.
-I'm gonna fucking kill you!
Fuck you,
you fucking maniac.
[ Coughs ]
Ah!
Broke my fucking nose.
[ Roars ]
[ Creatures growling ]
Holy shit!
Go, go, go!
Gary, they're coming!
GARY: Why won't these fucking
aliens leave us alone?!
[ Gasps ]
Dallas.
Look, I fucked up.
I was scared.
I know you're still
in there, bro.
I know you're still my buddy.
So fucking fight it, man.
Fucking fight it!
-[ Roars ]
-Aaaaaah!
[ Snarling ]
[ Dramatic music playing ]
Hurry the fuck up!
What the fuck?
Oh, my God.
Oh, Jack.
[ Roaring ]
Oh, my God!
Gary, look out!
Hey, Dallas.
[ Screams ]
Come on, I never did anything
to you.
Please, I'm sorry!
Please!
-[ Blade slices ]
-[ Roars ]
Holy shit!
Sam, be careful!
Watch out!
Oh, fuck.
Dropkick.
Sam, do the dropkick!
Sorry, Dallas.
Aah!
-Aah!
-Gary!
[ Grunting ]
Don't let go, Gary!
I'm holding on!
Hold on, Gary!
I'm slipping!
I'm slipping!
No, you're fucking not!
Hold on to my hand!
Aaah!
No!
No, Gary!
Gary, hold on!
Hold on!
Sam, help!
Sam!
Help!
Somebody help us!
Please, help!
Help us!
Please!
Holy shit!
What are we gonna do?
[ Weakly ] Grand finale.
What?
The grand finale.
Send those aliens to hell,
and tell them Jack sent them.
You're a fucking genius, buddy.
Don't die on me!
[ Music continues ]
[ Engine starts ]
Fuck space.
Holy shit!
Aaah!
Help!
Help us!
Please!
Grand finale.
Holy shit!
You did it, Jack.
Sam, catch!
I told you I kick ass
with a sword.
Whoa!
Jack!
-Jack, are you okay?
-Is he all right?
MILES: Barely.
SAM: Hey, Jack.
Hey, buddy.
Hey, Jack.
Jack, hey.
What happened?
Where am I?
There was just
a little accident.
But you're in our clubhouse.
You're gonna be fine.
We're gonna get you some help,
okay?
What happened to the aliens?
Blew them up.
It was fucking awesome.
Come on.
Help me get him up.
Come on, Jack.
Stay with us, Jack.
-Sam...
-Stop, stop.
Hey, Jack, what is it?
Will you protect the crystal?
With my life, buddy.
You're the coolest.
Jack, Jack.
Wake up.
Come on!
Stay with us, Jack.
Come on.
GARY:
Jack. Jack, Jack!
MILES: Come on, Jack.
Stay with us.
Jack, come on.
Come on, Jack.
Come on.
Jack.
Jack.
Come on, Jack.
Come on!
Come on, Jack.
[ Creatures growling ]
Shit, shit, shit!
Shit, why now?!
Give us
a fucking break already!
[ Guns cocking ]
[ Gunfire ]
We got kids.
Bag them.
They're fucking here.
Our friend is dying.
You got to help us.
Please help --
[ Screaming ]
Sam, no!
Get it off me!
[ Ominous music plays ]
Take it away.
[ Up-tempo music plays ]
[ Electronic music blaring ]
[ Music fades ]
[ Door rattles ]
[ Glass shatters ]
[ Footsteps ]
[ Growls ]
DAD: Oh, my God.
Family portrait is ruined.
I mean, what happened here?
MOM: Did they have
a party here?
DAD:
You got to be kidding me.
They turned our house
into a shithole?
MOM: Sam, how could you
let this happen?
DAD: This is gonna cost
a fortune to fix!
MOM:
Where's Gary?
-DAD: I'm so...
-[ Knocking on door ]
-MOM: Samantha!
-DAD: ...angry!
I don't even know where --
I can't believe
we trusted them!
You're the one who wanted
to have them! Ohh!
-Is that thing on?
-You've got to be kidding me!
I mean, our place is fucked!
Gary, if this has
something to do with your movie,
I'm gonna ground you
and your sister
for the rest of your lives.
These damn kids don't deserve
parents like us.
-[ Growling ]
-[ Screaming ]
DAD:
What's happening?!
[ Roaring ]