LaRoy, Texas (2023) Movie Script
1
Uh, everything okay?
Yeah, my truck broke down.
I wonder if you could
give me a lift.
Sure. Uh, I could do that.
Here.
Bad place to break down.
Is there a good place?
I guess not.
It's a good thing
I was passing by.
Kind of seemed like you were
just gonna keep on going.
No.
Of course now. How--
Well...
can't be too careful.
You worried I was some sort
of deranged maniac?
I...
I-I-I...
I didn't mean
anything like that.
How did you mean it?
What?
How did you mean it?
Well...
guess I didn't--
Didn't mean anything.
Maybe you should.
Should what?
Mean something.
Maybe you're right.
Oh, me, I'm...
I'm just messing with you,
buddy.
Oh, man.
You should see your face
right now.
Oh, man.
Of course,
the same goes for you.
What's that?
I could be the dangerous one,
bro, you know?
Yeah, okay.
Maybe I punched a hole
in your radiator
back at that gas station.
Well, why'd you do that?
I wouldn't.
Of course.
Just for example.
Maybe so you'd break down.
What?
Maybe so you'd break down
and I'd have to pick you up.
Why would you want
to pick me up?
I don't know. No reason.
Maybe so I could kill you.
So you could kill me?
Not really.
Just saying, you never know.
Maybe someone paid me
to kill you.
Who'd hire you to kill me?
No one. No one.
Just for example,
maybe your wife.
-My wife?
-Or ex-wife. I don't know.
Maybe she wants you dead.
Don't listen to me.
I'm just making small talk.
Maybe there's a custody battle.
Maybe she doesn't want you
anywhere near her kids.
Maybe it's cheaper
to have you killed
than to hire a lawyer.
They're very expensive.
You'd be surprised.
Just... for example.
You, uh...
You need to--
You need to stop this car.
What?
You need to stop
this fucking car.
Your face.
Yeah?
When?
Where's LaRoy?
Ray!
Ray, over here!
Skip?
Have a seat, amigo.
I didn't know
if you'd recognize me.
I used to hang
with your brother some.
Oh, yeah, right.
We played pool together.
Eight ball, corner pocket,
cutthroat.
Uh, mostly eight ball,
but good times.
He ever mention me?
I don't think so.
Hmm.
Did you send me this?
I did, yes.
Um...
I thought--
I thought it would be best
if we met somewhere discreet.
Do you want something to eat?
-Hey, come on.
-Meet about what?
Um, okay, we can just dive
right in if you want.
Um...
I don't know if you've heard...
but I'm a private
detective now.
-No, I hadn't heard.
-Yeah.
You know, I do big cases,
small cases, medium-sized cases.
And, uh, I was on a stakeout
the other day
at the, uh, Velvet Saddle.
You know it?
Can't say I do.
A little motel
out there past Brillo.
-Hmm.
-Basically a dump.
Um, but people use it
for illicit activities,
including, um...
how should I say it?
Intimate...
rendezvous...
rendezvous of the sexual nature,
if you know what I mean.
Okay, well, anyway,
so I'm on this case.
Divorce case.
Can't tell you who it is.
But...
Unless you want to know.
-No, that's okay.
-Okay.
Well, I'm on this case, and...
I saw something that,
uh, I think...
you might find interesting.
What is this?
Yeah, I was like,
"Is that Stacy-Lynn Wright?
Wait, I know that girl."
And then I was like,
"Hey, isn't she married
to Ray Jepson?"
I'm not quite sure,
because I wasn't invited
to the wedding,
but, yeah, yeah, no,
I know her.
I know what
you're going through, amigo.
I just got out of a, you know,
real serious relationship.
It's tough. At least you--
Goddamn it!
Hey! Hey!
Wait!
Oh...
What the hell, Brett?
Oh, I guess you shouldn't have
parked in a handicapped spot.
I wasn't parked
in a handicapped spot.
They don't even have
a handicapped spot!
Dick!
Assholes.
You know, just because I don't
have a badge, they think that...
I'm not a real detective.
Who was she with?
Who?
Oh, I don't know.
I don't know.
I had to leave before she--
She came out.
She was in there a while.
Why did you take these?
What do you mean?
Why did you take these pictures?
I told you, because
I'm a private detective.
-Did I hire you to take them?
-No.
Did she hire you to take them?
Did she hire me
to take pictures of herself?
No.
Did anyone hire you
to take these pictures?
No. Like I said,
I was on a stakeout.
Right. Well, maybe next time
you'll mind your own business.
How'd it go?
Uh, good.
Yeah, good.
So you think she's got a shot?
Oh, absolutely.
Does she have any other talents?
Why? You don't think
she's good?
No, mnh-mnh. It's not that.
Um, it's just...
a lot of the girls sing
for their talent.
Sometimes it's good
to stand out.
Well, none of them can sing
as good as she can.
I'm sure of that.
Uh-huh.
Oh, um, we'll work on some
interview questions next week.
Where the hell you been?
Sorry.
We're gonna be late.
What are you waiting for?
Go!
A beauty salon?
Yes, sir.
It's a lot of money.
Well, it's gonna be
cutting edge.
All the latest styles
and techniques.
We won't just be cutting hair.
We'll be changing lives.
Is that extra?
-What?
-Changing lives?
No, uh, that's included
in the price.
Do you have any experience
running a salon?
Not exactly, but I coach
young beauty contestants.
I'm a former winner myself.
Beaux County, 2008.
Huh. Is that so?
So I know a thing or two
about beauty.
Well, sure.
It's just...
It's a lot of money,
and you don't have
any business experience.
No, but Ray does.
He and his brother
run his family's store,
Jepson's Home and Hardware.
And they've been open
how long now?
What?
How long's the store
been open?
-Forty-three years.
-Forty-three years.
Now, that's got to count
for something.
Sure. Sure.
I'll never forget
the day I won my crown.
Up on that stage.
Lights all shining.
The audience cheering
as they placed it on my head.
It was the happiest moment
of my whole life.
I want to share that feeling.
I want every woman
who leaves my salon
feeling like
she was just crowned
the beauty queen of LaRoy.
That's sweet.
I like that.
You're a lot of goddamn help
back there.
Sorry.
Guess my professional ambitions
don't interest you.
-We'll get the money.
-How?
I don't know,
but we'll find a way.
What the hell's that?
-Hmm.
-Hmm.
Not bad, huh?
Twelve-inch touch display.
Electric wind block.
The wave is ridiculous.
Jeez, how much
you spend on this?
Nah, I got a deal.
Come on, everyone's out back.
Now, Ray couldn't talk to girls.
I mean, like, not at all.
He couldn't say "boo"
if there were a pair of panties
within a hundred feet.
But he had this huge crush
on Sara Fixler.
She was this, uh,
this gothy vampire chick.
So we're at this party,
and Ray asks if I wouldn't mind
talking to her for him.
So I say, "Sure."
I mean, I want to help
my baby bro out, right?
And I swear to God,
that's all I was planning
on doing.
But this girl,
she is a total freak.
And she's so grateful that
I'm just, like, talking to her.
She starts coming on to me.
Big-time.
I mean, she's all over me.
Oh, what-- What was I gonna do?
Right?
Poor Ray comes in, catches us.
And lo and behold,
suddenly he can speak!
He shouts...
You remember what you said, Ray?
It was a long time ago, Junior.
He shouts, "You were
supposed to talk to her,
not finger-bang her!"
God, Junior!
What's finger-bang?
Oh, sweetie, um...
it's kind of like a high five.
Sara wasn't a vampire.
She just liked
to dye her hair sometimes.
I'm going to bed.
Stacy-Lynn.
I'm gonna get that money.
I promise.
You know, everyone thought
Kelly Capshaw
was gonna win that crown.
She was the runner-up
the year before.
Had all the judges
tied around her finger.
But then I played
"American Girl" on the flute,
and it brought down
the goddamn house.
I knew right then
I was going places.
Chad?
I thought we were putting
the display by the register.
Junior said
it looks better here.
But I told you
to put it by the register.
Then Junior said
to put it here.
I told Chad to put the display
by the register.
Hmm, I think it's better
by the doors.
Can I talk to you
about something?
Can it wait? I got a call.
I need money.
For what?
Stacy-Lynn
wants to open a salon.
She's got it all worked out.
It's gonna be real nice.
Well, uh, what can I do
about it?
Tell me, when was the last time
we gave ourselves a raise?
A raise?
Well, we can't go around
giving ourselves raises
whenever we feel like it.
Well...
how much do you make?
I make the same as you, Ray.
We're partners, remember?
How come your house
is so much bigger than mine?
How come you can afford a boat?
I told you, I got a deal.
I'm what they call
business savvy.
That's why I work
behind the scenes
and you manage the floor.
But you're always
contradicting me.
How's anyone supposed
to respect me?
You're right.
You know, I'll go tell Chad
to move the display.
No, no, you go tell him.
Tell him I said it was okay.
It's not about the display.
I need money.
Stacy-Lynn is not happy.
I think she's...
You think she what?
She's just not happy.
Stacy-Lynn?
- Yeah?
- Brought dinner.
Where are you going?
To see a movie.
With who?
Becky.
Why are you all dressed up?
Because I want to look nice.
Is there something wrong
with that?
Do you know
when you'll be back?
Probably late.
Just...
eat your pizza.
Oh, I talked to Junior about
borrowing money from the store.
What'd he say?
It's not a good time.
Jesus.
I'm gonna be late.
I'd like to buy a gun.
Sure. What kind?
I don't know.
This is a popular one,
depending what you need it for.
Uh, excuse me.
So, what do you think?
I think I need
something shorter.
You're early.
-I am?
-So, uh...
how do we do this, man?
Do we like--
Hey, what's with
the fucking gun, man?
Oh, I was just, um...
I don't-- Excuse me.
Here.
- All right.
- Sorry.
That's half, all right?
-Half?
-You can count it if you want,
but it's all there.
Well, half of it's there.
Like I said, it's half.
Listen, man, this thing
is time-sensitive.
That's the main thing.
It's got to be done tomorrow,
or the whole thing
gets thrown off.
I don't care how you do it.
It's just got
to be done tomorrow.
How are you gonna do it?
Hmm? Are you gonna shoot him?
Hmm? Are you gonna
poison his coffee,
or are you gonna blow up
his car?
Obviously, you're not gonna
blow up his car.
Shit, man. Maybe you are, huh?
I don't know. You're the expert.
Oh, God.
You know what?
I don't fucking want to know.
Just get it done,
and get it done tomorrow.
-All right?
-Wait, wait, wait.
I can't do it tomorrow.
What?
I'm busy tomorrow.
What are you talking about?
Look, I-I... I'm...
I'm sorry.
Are you serious? Huh?
Hey, man, we had a fucking deal.
This is time-sensitive.
I'm sorry.
Jesus fucking Christ!
They said you were some kind
of fucking badass!
They did?
Said you were
this scary fucking killer.
You don't look like
a scary killer to me.
You look like
a goddamn pushover!
I'm not.
Not what?
A pushover.
Well, which is it, then?
Which is what?
Are you a...
scary fucking badass?
Or aren't you?
Yeah.
Excuse me?
Yeah.
I am.
Good.
It's got to be done,
and it's got to be done
tomorrow.
All right?
Jesus fucking Christ.
-How was the movie?
-Jesus!
You scared the shit out of me.
What'd you see?
What?
What did you see?
I forgot the name.
I'm going to bed.
He didn't show.
Give a name?
What number did he call from?
All right.
Hi.
I'm here to pick up my car.
It's an '87 Crown Vic.
Two-eighteen.
Two dollars and eighteen cents,
or $218?
The second.
Are you kidding me?
You were parked
in a handicapped spot.
-That was a joke.
-Handicaps use those spots.
I...
Yes, I know that they use
those spots.
I wasn't parked
in a handicapped spot.
That's what I'm trying
to tell you.
The cops, they were just
messing with me.
They don't even have
a handicapped spot,
so how could I be parked
in one?
It's 218.
What...
Sign here.
Where are the tires?
Doesn't have any.
I know it doesn't have any!
I can see it doesn't have
any tires!
I'm wondering why
it doesn't have any tires!
Hey, we got ya!
-Suck a dick!
-Whoo!
I don't see what's so important
about a badge.
You know who else wears badges?
Girl Scouts.
You see them out solving crimes?
I seriously doubt it.
Hey, what'd you say
your name was again?
Hey, you made it.
Oh. Yeah. Okay, cool.
See you later!
Damn.
Hey.
Hey, amigo!
Never seen you in here before.
I felt like a drink.
Drink my ass!
You're in here for some action
after breaking up
with that cheating bitch
wife of yours.
Well, you know what?
You're in luck,
because I just happen to be
an excellent wingman.
So, let's see
what we got going on here.
We didn't break up.
And she's not a bitch.
Oh, wait. Let me guess.
she, uh, started to cry,
and then she said,
"It didn't mean anything,
I swear.
Never happen again.
Blah, blah, blah."
Actually, we haven't
talked about it yet.
Why not?
It wasn't a good time.
Well, I would argue that
it wasn't a good time for her
to go screw some other guy.
But that didn't seem
to stop her.
You know, this is none
of your business.
Factually speaking,
it is my business.
Um, although, honestly,
not partial to divorce cases.
Damn it. I gotta go.
Hey, I got you a beer!
Hey.
Who are you?
No one.
Why are you following me?
-I wasn't.
-Bullshit.
Who's she?
Give me those!
Why are you following me?
I wasn't.
Did somebody hire you?
No. No! Ah!
I wasn't gonna do it!
-Do what?
-Nothing.
What are you gonna do? Huh?
What are you gonna do?
Why are you following me?
Who hired you?
Who fucking hired you?
What the hell, Ray?
I'm sorry, Kayla.
I need to talk to Junior.
Okay, well, he's not home.
Do you know where he is?
Well, it's the middle
of the night,
so if I had to guess,
he's probably out
fucking his girlfriend.
How'd you find out?
I suspected for a while.
Have you talked to him?
What's the point? He'd just lie.
Well, how do you know that?
Because he's a fucking liar,
Ray.
Who's the girl?
Jesus. Do you really not know?
What?
It's Stacy-Lynn.
What?
My husband and your wife
are having an affair.
No. No way.
He's probably got his dick
up her ass right now.
Stacy-Lynn wouldn't do that.
What, anal?
Hmm, don't be so sure.
Junior can be very persuasive.
I mean, she wouldn't cheat on me
with my own brother.
Oh, okay, so you're saying
she's home right now?
Want to give her a call,
find out?
He used to be
so much more discreet.
Now he's just getting lazy.
You know...
...I found this in his laundry.
4311.
You're assigned
to a vandalism case.
835 Hatter, do you copy?
10-4.
No.
Why are you
being so difficult?
- I'm not.
- Just sit with us.
-I said no.
-Come on.
I can't. I have to go.
Just come here. What?
Come on. Where are you going?
-How are we doing?
-Fine.
What you got there?
Ah.
It's a police scanner.
Just a little hobby.
It's good to have hobbies.
Keeps your mind active.
I, um...
I noticed those men
were bothering you.
Oh, they get a little
rowdy sometimes.
It's just part of the job.
Why is it part of the job?
I...
I don't know. It just is.
People only see
what we let them.
Excuse me?
If we want people
to respect us,
we need to give them a reason.
Maybe you could
teach them some manners.
-You want me to hurt them?
-What?
Do you want me
to hurt those men for you?
Are you serious?
Isn't that
what you're asking?
People only get away
with what we let them.
But you have to be sure.
There's no changing
your mind on this.
Once you ask me to hurt them,
that's what I'm gonna do.
It's important to finish things
once we start them,
don't you think?
I...
I'd better get back
to the kitchen.
45 to 41,
we got a call about a body
out on Swift Creek Road.
Unidentified male,
late 40s, early 50s.
What's the address?
Unclear.
Witness is no longer at scene.
10-4, we're on our way.
Everything okay?
Yes, sir. You can't stop here.
It's a crime scene.
Gosh. What-- What kind of crime?
-Homicide.
-Sir, you gotta keep moving.
Okay. Okay.
Who's the victim?
James Barlow. You know him?
- No. How did he die?
- Sir!
Lady hit him with her car.
But most likely,
he was already dead.
-Gunshot.
-Shut the fuck up, Potter.
Sir, you gotta keep moving,
all right?
Uh, sure.
You officers have a--
Have a good night.
What the fuck's wrong with you?
What?
...about your height.
He's kind of like
a gentle-looking guy.
Oh, okay, yeah.
Ray, right?
Yeah, that sounds like Ray.
Oh, yeah, that's--
-He's probably over there.
-Is that the guy?
Where's the money?
-What money?
-The money from the safe.
I don't know
what you're talking about.
How did you find me here?
The name of this place
is on your shirt, Ray.
Oh, God.
-God!
-Don't fuck with me, Ray.
Do not fuck with me.
Okay! Okay, okay.
Tell me where the money is.
What money?
Barlow had money in the safe.
Nobody else knew about it, Ray.
I don't know about it.
I said don't fuck with me, Ray.
-Ah!
-Don't do it!
God!
Uh, Ray?
Can I take my break now?
Yeah, Chad, that's fine.
Okay.
You've got 24 hours
to give me that money,
or I make an anonymous
phone call to the police
and I tell them
who killed James Barlow.
All right, Ray?
Miss Jepson?
Yeah?
I'm Officer Stevens.
This is Officer Potter.
Okay?
Hey. Hey, what are you doing?
Get away from there.
Hey, did you hear the news?
What news?
Somebody killed James Barlow.
Who's that?
He's a lawyer.
He was actually
at the bar last night.
-Oh, really?
-Yeah.
I thought you might
find that interesting.
And why is that?
Because I saw you
follow him out.
Here she comes.
Thank you.
-I didn't mean to kill him.
-You shot him in the head.
What'd you think
was gonna happen?
No, no, no. He was attacking me.
So that was self-defense.
You were hired to kill him.
That was a mistake.
-How much did they pay you?
-Nothing.
A few thousand dollars.
I didn't do it for the money.
I wasn't even
gonna go through with it.
I just wanted to know
what it felt like.
What?
I don't know.
To not be a pushover.
That's a weird reason
to want to kill someone, Ray.
Look, this is a conundrum,
a real conundrum.
On the one hand,
the police would love
to know what I know.
They might even
give me a badge,
make me an honorary
member of the force,
I don't know.
On the other hand...
I still don't know
all the facts.
-Right.
-Right.
Guess there's only
one thing left to do.
What?
I'm taking the case.
What case?
There is no case.
Excuse me, Ray, I think I know
a case when I see one.
This guy hired you
to kill Barlow, did he not?
Can you please be quiet?
And Barlow had some money
that he thinks you stole.
-Sure.
-But somebody else must have.
I guess.
Now you have
to find the said money,
or this guy is gonna
turn you in to the police.
Right.
Um, sounds like
a case to me, Ray.
Look, I appreciate it,
but I don't think
I need any help.
Yes, you do.
Skip, please, just--
You need a professional
in this.
You're not even
a real detective.
That's what you think?
I didn't mean it like that.
You know what?
The way I see it,
you got two options.
You let me solve this.
And when I go down
to the police
and convince those assholes
that I'm a real detective,
maybe I'll leave
your name out of it.
Or...
I go down to the station
right now.
Tell them everything I know
about the last known
whereabouts of James Barlow.
Your call, amigo.
I'm looking for a guy.
He drives a rusty brown
pickup truck.
You know him?
Why you looking for him?
It's a private matter.
Sorry, can't help you.
It's important that I find him.
We don't give out customers'
personal information.
I...
Sorry.
Uh... God, this is so
embarrassing.
I was here the other night,
and I think I hit his truck.
No.
I did hit his truck.
I don't usually go
to places like this.
I... I...
I was embarrassed, and I didn't
want to have to explain.
You know,
and I just kept driving.
I felt terrible about it
the next day.
I didn't know
how to get a hold of him.
I'm just trying
to do the right thing.
Can you help me?
Name, phone number, something?
Talk to Angie.
Which one is Angie?
So, this is where he works, huh?
Yeah, I think so.
His name's on the sign.
All right, just follow my lead.
Look, I think it's better
if I just do the talking.
I'm sorry, uh, my secretary
went home for the day.
I'm afraid we had some bad news.
What can I do for you?
-Well, sir...
-Well, you see...
That's actually why we're here.
Do you mind if we ask you some
questions about James Barlow?
I'm so sorry for your loss.
Thank you. The whole thing's
been quite a shock.
Ask him where he was last night.
Did your partner have
any enemies that you know of?
Enemies? No, I--
I don't think so.
-Ask him where he was--
-Shh!
Uh, did you notice
anything unusual?
In what way?
I don't know. In any way?
Not really, no.
Ask him where he was last night.
Just let me do this. I can talk.
I-I-I'm sorry, did you say
you're from the police?
Uh, no, sir.
We're not really here
in any official capacity.
-Yes, we are. We are official.
-No, we are not.
-Why are you here?
-Where were you last night?
Okay, I'm gonna ask you
to leave.
I'm afraid we can't do that.
I'm afraid I'm gonna
have to insist,
unless you'd like me
to call the police.
Um, I understand.
But before we go,
is it okay if I use
your bathroom?
Make it quick.
What are you doing? Get off me!
Get your hands--
-Where's the money, asshole?
-What are you doing?
This guy knows something.
I can see it in his eyes.
Are you saying something?
I can't quite hear you!
-You're gonna drown him.
-I'm not gonna drown him.
It takes two minutes
for the brain to lose any...
Do you know CPR?
One, two, three, four,
five, six, seven, eight,
nine, ten, eleven, twelve.
Ah!
You okay? You're okay.
-What was Barlow up to?
-I don't know.
Huh? Who is he
mixed up with, huh?
I have no idea!
He doesn't know anything.
We'll see. We'll see.
Where'd the money
come from, huh? Huh?
How did Barlow get the money?
You're gonna drown him again!
Will you relax?
I've got this, okay?
Goddamn it!
Oh, there you go.
Yeah. Yeah. There you go.
Get it out. You're okay.
You're okay. He's okay.
Thanks, amigo.
Who wanted Barlow dead?
I don't know.
No, no, no! Okay, okay, okay!
I know-- I know one thing.
I-I-I-- I heard him
talking to a client.
Uh, uh, something about--
about blackmail.
Okay, who was the client?
It's attorney-client privilege--
Okay! Okay!
Adam. Adam LeDoux!
The car guy?
Goddamn, we make a good team!
We should think about
partnering up full time.
What the hell was that?
What?
You can't just go around
drowning people.
I'm not "going around
drowning people."
That was one guy.
You could have killed that man.
Well, technically, I did. Twice.
But come on, man.
Everything's fine.
He's gonna be okay.
We just got our first lead.
How can you not be excited
about this?
Hello?
Excuse me, I'm here to see
my wife, Stacy-Lynn Jepson.
Come with me.
And you stay here.
Have a seat right there.
Right there.
What are you doing here?
Working the James Barlow case.
-Oh, yeah?
-That's right.
Huh.
I already got a couple leads.
Maybe sometime
we could exchange notes.
Yeah, sure.
I got a note for you.
How about you, uh, fuck off.
Leave the detective work
to the real detectives.
Hmm.
Mr. Jepson?
Where is my wife?
She's down the hall.
She's fine.
Why is she here?
Do you know a James Barlow?
No.
- Does your wife know him?
- Of course not.
Why "of course not"?
I mean, I don't know him,
so I'm sure she doesn't either.
Why? Who is he?
He's a lawyer.
He was found dead this morning.
Run over and shot in the head.
Run over?
And shot in the head.
Well...
I don't understand.
What does this have to do
with Stacy-Lynn?
That's what we're trying
to figure out.
Mr. Barlow had a photograph
of your wife
when he was found dead.
Can you think of any reason
why this man
might have a photograph
of your wife?
No.
Hmm.
What's he doing here?
Um, last I checked, uh,
I was picking your ass up
from the police station.
My car broke down.
He gave me a ride.
-Why is he dressed like that?
-You know, I'm right here.
Um, this is my uniform,
and my clients expect
a certain par excellence, so...
You look like you're going
to cowboy prom.
Am I dropping you at home,
or is there a motel
that you'd like to go to?
I'll see you later, honey.
Damn, man.
I gotta hand it to you.
Leaving your wife's photo
at the crime scene,
that is some
cold-blooded shit, man!
I didn't leave it there.
Okay, Whatever you say.
-Must have fallen out.
-Mm-hmm. Yeah.
Well, either way,
it's nice for you.
Police think she killed Barlow.
All you got to do
is let her take the blame now.
That's my wife.
Yeah.
Your lying, cheating wife.
And she didn't kill anyone.
No, but she broke your heart.
And in a lot of ways,
that's a lot worse.
I'm not framing my wife!
Okay, fine! It's just a thought.
God, you want to look
a gift horse in the mouth?
Be my guest.
-Do you like camping?
-What?
You know, like tents and shit?
'Cause I know
this great fishing place
down by Shafter,
and I was thinking
after we solve this thing,
we should, you know,
go down there for a few days.
What are you talking about?
I'm talking about camping.
You realize my wife just
got questioned by the police?
Yeah, I know,
that's why I'm saying.
You seem very stressed,
and I think you should take
a little time to yourself.
With a friend.
Just stay here, okay?
I'm not staying here.
You stay here.
This is my life.
Do you understand that?
-Yes, I understand.
-And I don't need you
screwing it up
any more than it already is.
Oh, you think you can do this
all by yourself? Go ahead!
Fishing trip off!
Oh, welcome
to LeDoux Family Auto.
How can we help you today?
I need to speak to Mr. LeDoux.
Well, he's busy at the moment.
Would you like to speak
with one of our associates?
I'll wait.
What the fuck did you do?
What are you talking about?
Who are you?
Sit.
What do you want?
You asked me to come.
What are you talking about?
The killing
doesn't take too long.
Most of the job
is driving around,
sleeping in dirty motels,
eating bad food.
So how I see it,
by the time I got here,
most of the job was done.
It was discourteous of you
not to respect that.
Who the fuck are you?
I'm gonna ask
some questions now.
Put your hand on the table.
Fuck you.
Why did you want
James Barlow killed?
I didn't...
You piece of shit!
You killed him?
No!
I swear to God!
I paid--
I paid someone to do it.
What the fuck were you thinking?
Put it back.
Fuck you!
Who killed James Barlow?
Who the fuck are you?
Thing of beauty, ain't she?
450 horsepower.
Premium leather interior.
Ultra premium sound system.
I might be able
to get you a deal.
I know the boss.
Adam LeDoux.
I'm not buying a car.
Excuse me?
I'm not here to buy a car.
Okay, then, uh,
what can I do for you?
I'm here about the blackmail.
Get out before I break
your goddamn neck.
-No, no, no, sir, please--
-Get out!
How'd it go?
He said to come back later.
Later? When later?
Can we just go talk
to someone else?
Who? We don't have
any other leads.
I don't know.
You're the detective.
Oh, now I'm the detective.
Oh, shit...
Where's my goddamn money?
Nice work, Ray.
Where the hell you been?
I've been sitting around
in my underwear like an asshole.
The police just brought me in
for questioning.
About what?
Some guy got shot last night.
-Who?
-Some lawyer.
Never met him in my life.
Someone killed him
and broke into his safe.
Well, how much did they get?
How do I know?
Whoa, what's this got
to do with you?
He was carrying around
a picture of me
when he died.
What kind of picture?
A picture me
walking into this shithole.
What? Why?
Hell if I know!
Well, what'd you tell
the police?
I didn't tell them anything.
What could I tell them?
Well, you didn't say anything
about me, did you?
A dead man is carrying around
a photograph of me,
and you're worried
about yourself?
N-No, of course not.
Come on.
Does Ray know?
I don't know.
He was acting all weird.
He didn't say nothing.
You think you can threaten me?
No, no, no, sir,
I wasn't trying to threaten you.
You think you can come
in my place of business
and threaten me?
You said not to talk.
-Where's my money?
-We don't have it.
- Well, who does?
- We don't know.
The hell you don't.
You got about three seconds
before I-I start...
Oh, goddamn it!
Is everything all right?
Everything's fine, sweetie.
We're just having
a little meeting.
-You want some coffee?
-No, no, no.
We're fine. Just go inside now.
I'll be right in.
All right.
Who are you?
And don't bullshit me.
Am I allowed to talk?
Easy!
I'm just getting my cards.
- Private detective?
- That's right.
You need security,
executive protection.
You give me a call.
You spelled "detective" wrong.
Son of a bitch.
Who do you work for?
We don't work for anyone.
Well, then, what's
your interest in this?
The police think that my wife
had something to do
with James Barlow's death.
- Did she?
- No!
She never even met him.
Look, we just want to get to
the bottom of this, that's all.
How much do you know?
We know that you were
being blackmailed,
and that James Barlow
got killed because of it.
Hell, I didn't have anything
to do with that!
Now, I've got plenty
of witnesses that can tell...
Goddamn it!
-I said no coffee.
-Well, it's for them.
Okay.
Thank you.
Mm! Thank you, ma'am.
Go back inside now, sweetie.
Let us finish our meeting.
Well, now, do you need
anything else?
We're just fine.
I'll be in in a minute.
My wife.
This whole thing's
been damn hard on her.
Look, anything you could tell us
will be helpful.
A few months ago,
I had an affair.
There was this...
woman.
She was young and attractive,
and I was stupid.
Well, I felt guilty as hell.
But when I tried to call it off,
she decided to blackmail me.
Said if I didn't pay her
$250,000,
she was gonna tell
about the affair.
- So, what'd you do?
- Well, what could I do?
I told my wife.
we thought it would be better
just to pay the money.
But if she knew
about the affair,
then why did you pay her?
People know me.
I'm a family man.
Hell, it says so
on the damn sign.
"LeDoux Family Autos."
That matters to people.
Folks come here
because they trust me.
I mean, what are they gonna say
if they think I'm some kind
of goddamn philanderer?
Well, when did
the lawyer come in?
He was supposed
to give the girl the money.
But before he could,
some asshole murdered him
and broke open his safe.
Well, who else
has the combination?
How do I know?
Hell, you're the goddamn
professionals.
You tell me.
Do you think you, uh...
You think you can find
the money?
I guess we should talk
to this girl first.
What's her name?
Angie.
At least that's what she said
her name was.
She's an exotic dancer
over at the, uh, Sunset Lounge.
Goddamn it!
Redhead? Great ass?
Yeah. You know her?
Yeah, I know her.
This is the serious
relationship?
Yep.
What happened?
Um...
I just needed
to focus on my career.
Kind of broke her heart,
I think.
And, uh, I just...
I just hope she's over it,
that's all.
Hey! What the hell, Angie?
- Who's that?
- It's me!
-Skip?
-Yes!
Don't mind the mess.
Who the hell is that?
That's Brian.
That's the guy who hired me.
Wait. "Brian" Brian?
The guy you dumped me for?
Wait, I thought you said
you broke up with her.
Ha! I went out with him one time
because I felt sorry for him.
I can't believe you ditched me
for this guy.
-He looks like an asshole.
-He was an asshole.
But at least he didn't dress
like Howdy fucking Doody.
What happened to him?
He got shot.
- I can see that. Who shot him?
- I don't know.
I was too busy getting the shit
kicked out of me.
God, I need a cigarette.
Angie, where's the money?
What money?
Cut the bullshit.
We talked to LeDoux.
He told us all about
your little blackmail scheme.
You don't know a damn thing.
Oh, I do. I think I know a lot.
Oh, yeah?
Well, how about this?
I didn't blackmail LeDoux.
He hired me.
Hired you for what?
He was a regular at the club.
I used to give him
private dances.
You were sleeping with LeDoux
while we were together?
We were never together,
first of all.
Second, I never slept
with LeDoux.
What do you mean?
Who the fuck is that?
Wait, what do you mean
you never slept with LeDoux?
I mean I never slept with him.
He had this plan
to get $250,000.
Said he'd give me 10%
if I pretended to blackmail him.
Wait, blackmail himself?
That doesn't make any sense.
It does if it's not his money.
Which it wasn't.
He likes to pretend
he's all important,
but his wife's the rich one.
Some kind of heiress
or something.
I was supposed to pretend
like I was blackmailing him,
and when she paid, I was
supposed to give it to him.
So, what happened?
Dipshit over there
is what happened.
He decided 10% wasn't enough,
so he found someone
to kill the dude's lawyer,
take the whole damn thing
for himself.
But then he goes
and hires the wrong guy.
Gives the payment
to some fucking imbecile
from the hardware store.
Next thing I know,
real killer shows up at my door.
Guy's some kind
of goddamn maniac.
What did he want?
He wants the money.
All of it.
Says he's owed for his troubles.
Hey, whoa, whoa, whoa.
Wait, where are you going?
-To find Stacy-Lynn.
-What? Now?
Did you not see inside there?
This guy's a maniac.
Yeah, who cares? All we have
to do is find the money first.
I don't care about the money.
I only care about my wife.
What do you think it means?
I think Ray had something to do
with him getting killed.
Come on. Ray?
He's got the man's name
and address
along with a pile of cash
shoved in his underwear drawer.
You got a better explanation?
Maybe he's holding it
for a friend.
No, Ray doesn't have
any friends.
Well, yeah.
But how much is it?
A few thousand.
You think it's the money
from the safe?
Maybe some of it.
It just doesn't seem like enough
to kill somebody over.
Well, where's the rest?
Stacy-Lynn!
Stacy-Lynn!
Stacy!
She's not here.
- I'm sure she's fine!
- I have to find her.
I have to get her out of town
before something happens to her.
How do you know
she'll go with you?
- What?
- You're leaving town?
How do you know that Stacy-Lynn
will go with you?
She's my wife.
Exactly.
She hasn't been
the most loyal person.
What are you gonna do?
You just tell her what happened,
she's gonna drop everything
and run away with you?
I should have just
killed myself.
Man, you got to stop it
with these sad mopey routine.
Chicks don't like it.
How do you know what they like?
Well, I know they like
a man who's assertive.
I know they don't like
some sad sack
who goes around talking about
his ex-wife all the time.
She's not my ex-wife.
Whatever.
Look, you know what?
I think this is the best thing
to ever happen to you.
Mm-hmm. Okay, did you
accidentally shoot a man?
Yes. Did you do a terrible job
at trying to hide the body?
Also, yes.
But if you hadn't,
we wouldn't have teamed up
and had this
kick-ass adventure together.
Come on, man!
We're, like, finding clues
and solving crimes
and making memories.
Why does Junior
get whatever he wants?
Why can't I just get one thing?
Let me tell you something
about your brother.
He's an asshole.
He's always been an asshole.
You're twice the man he is.
Yeah!
Look, I know what it's like
to not be taken seriously, okay?
I know people laugh at me.
Don't respect what I do.
But that's about to change
for the both of us.
When we find that money,
we're gonna be heroes.
LeDoux might even
throw in a reward.
Stacy-Lynn, she's gonna
crawl back to you
and beg for forgiveness.
Trust me, man.
Now I'm gonna go take a piss.
And when I'm done,
we're gonna go out
and solve this thing
because we're this close.
I can feel it! Come on! Yeah!
Yes!
What'd you do?
I don't know!
Wait, who are they?
They work for Mrs. LeDoux.
She wants to talk to us.
Okay. Sorry. My bad.
Sorry.
Sit.
Oh, do you have
anything to drink?
-Sit the fuck down.
-Right.
Oh, thank you for coming.
Can I get you
something to drink?
Yeah, I would, actually...
They're fine.
Elijah, what happened
to your head?
Oh, um, there was a slight
misunderstanding.
Oh! Well, what kind
of misunderstanding?
Well, ma'am,
Elijah here thought
that he wasn't a little bitch,
and I thought he was.
I understand you're working
with my husband.
We... have similar interests.
And have you found
anything interesting?
We haven't
found your money,
if that's what you're asking.
We're still trying to figure out
who broke into Barlow's safe.
That was me.
Excuse me?
I'm the one that broke
into the safe.
That's why I asked you here,
'cause I thought
that might help
with your investigation.
Oh, so you have the money?
Oh, no.
Uh, the safe was empty,
unfortunately.
Well-- Well,
I don't understand.
My husband has certain...
weaknesses.
In his case,
it's women and, uh, gambling.
I've, uh--
I've paid off his debt
more times than I can count.
My daddy left me
a large inheritance.
But there's a limit, and...
well, finally, I...
I had to cut him off.
So he concocted this ridiculous
blackmailing scheme.
So you knew
he wasn't having an affair?
Well, not at first,
but eventually.
And I didn't want
another fight, so...
I tried to take
the money back myself.
I-I asked Elijah and Felix
to break
into Mr. Barlow's house.
But like I said before,
the money wasn't there.
Well, where was it?
I wish I knew.
I-- I would appreciate it
if you could keep
this all discreet.
Oh, ma'am, we--
We're known for our discretion.
Why do you put up with it?
I beg your pardon?
Why do you let him
make you look like a fool?
Don't you get sick of that?
Hey, mind your own business!
No, it's okay.
Of course I do.
But he's my husband.
Eventually, he's gonna
tire himself out
and come back to me
like he always does.
And I'll be here.
Don't you ever think
that you deserve better?
What's deserve
got to do with it?
I'm just trying to get whatever
scrap of happiness I can
in this life.
I stopped believing
in fairy tales a long time ago.
So LeDoux hires Angie
to fake like
she's blackmailing him.
But Angie's asshole boyfriend,
he wants to keep the ransom
all to himself.
So he hires you to kill Barlow
so he can keep the money.
Meanwhile, Mrs. LeDoux
has already broken
into Barlow's safe,
and the money isn't there, so...
who has the money?
Maybe no one.
I know where the money is.
This is where he parked.
[Skip Yeah, so what?
So he had a briefcase,
but he didn't take it
into the bar.
What, you're telling me
he had, like, $250,000
he just left in his car?
I'm telling you,
I think that he knew
I was following him.
Yeah, okay, well,
it's not here now, so...
I got to take a leak.
Oh, shit!
What?
Coming?
That's it.
You got it?
Yeah, I got it.
-Do you got it?
-Yeah, I got it.
Ass!
What are you doing?
Where are you going?
No!
Yeah!
Hoo!
Are you kidding me?
Who's the detective now,
Brett, huh?
Who's the goddamn detective now?
Whoo-hoo-hoo-hoo!
Yeah!
What are you doing?
We can't turn it in.
Yeah, of course we can.
We found it first.
It's the only way.
Way for what?
That she'll go with me.
Stacy-Lynn?
Wait, you're gonna screw me over
for that bitch?
-Don't call her that!
-Hey, you know what?
It's time you heard
the hard truth, amigo.
Stacy-Lynn doesn't love you.
She probably never did.
And 250,000 cash
is not gonna change that.
-You don't even know her.
-Oh, I do.
I-I see people like her
every day.
I'm probably an expert.
And you know what?
You're better off without her.
You don't know anything.
You only date strippers,
and even that
you have to lie about.
You wouldn't even be out here
if it wasn't for me.
You think you could have
found this all by yourself?
Huh? You're not even
a detective.
Neither are you!
You take dirty pictures!
You think that makes you
a detective?
It doesn't.
It makes you a joke.
Well...
Man...
I thought we were friends.
We're not.
I never asked you
for your help.
She was a beauty queen.
She could've had anyone,
but she chose me.
Why? Hmm?
Ever ask yourself that?
Why'd she choose you?
Ray?
Where are you?
Where are you?
I got the money.
What?
For the salon.
I got the money.
I told you I'd get it, didn't I?
Ray, where are you?
Baby, I have so much
I have to tell you,
but I can't do it
over the phone.
Where can we meet?
At the house.
Yeah.
All right.
I'm heading there now.
I'll see you soon.
I love you.
Why is he here?
I was worried about you,
baby bro.
I don't need you
to worry about me.
Ray, we're both worried.
I found this.
I was gonna tell you about that.
- We just want to help.
- No, I don't need your help!
Stay out of this!
I got the money for us.
I got the money.
I love you.
I love you, Stacy-Lynn.
I love you too.
Okay? And...
We did this for you.
Did what?
Did what, Stacy-Lynn?
Stay strong, honey!
41 to 45.
Go ahead.
Got the suspect in custody.
We're on our way in.
I know who killed James Barlow.
Have a seat. Someone will be
with you to take your statement.
I don't want
to make a statement.
I solved the case.
What is this guy doing?
Like, is he serious?
Oh, come on! Jesus!
Are you kidding me?
-You got this?
-Yeah, I got this.
I got an officer down.
Hey, what's going on?
Driving a white sedan
with Nebraska plates.
14-11, 14-11.
Road needs to be closed
at 264...
Oh, hell, yeah.
There's some goddamn
detective work right there.
Junior!
Junior! Where is he, Kayla?
He's gone.
-Gone? Gone where?
-"Gone" Gone.
He left me.
-What?
-Didn't you hear?
He and Stacy-Lynn,
they're in love.
They're running away together.
Running? Running where?
I mean, what about Olive?
What about you guys?
What about--
What about the store?
Store's done.
What are you talking about?
Jesus, Ray, how stupid are you?
Junior's been stealing
from the store for years.
How do you think he can afford
this house, huh?
How do you think he bought
a goddamn boat?
Skip?
Do you have the money?
Where's Skip?
He's here.
Do you have the money?
I can get it.
All right.
That's right.
How's that? Yeah!
Whoo!
You like that?
Yeah!
There's more
where that came from.
- Whoo!
- Yeah, there is.
Whoo!
- Jesus!
- Ah!
-Ray?
-Ray? How'd you--
Hey, take a deep breath, okay?
You sure you know
how to use that thing?
Ray!
Ray, please, no.
I want a divorce.
Can I ask you something?
Okay.
Why'd you marry me?
I don't know.
I think I just stopped
believing in myself.
Yeah, stop the car.
Is that it?
Yep.
Bring it over.
Let him go first.
Go on.
You okay?
Yeah, I'm great.
Sorry.
Whatever.
Bring it over.
No.
Give it to me.
What are you doing?
Give it to him.
No.
He's not leaving here
with this money.
You are.
-Ah!
-Ray!
Ray, come on, come on, come on.
Climb out.
You go.
No. We got to get you
to a hospital.
I'll be fine.
I'm not going without you.
You're bleeding out.
I'm sorry I said
we weren't friends.
I don't care about that.
You're a great detective.
Give the money to the police.
Tell them everything.
Ray.
I'll be okay.
I'm okay.
He's still breathing.
Where's the cowboy?
Gone.
Does he have the money?
If I let you go,
will you leave town?
Why?
Because it's important to finish
things once we start them.
It's all right.
Uh, everything okay?
Yeah, my truck broke down.
I wonder if you could
give me a lift.
Sure. Uh, I could do that.
Here.
Bad place to break down.
Is there a good place?
I guess not.
It's a good thing
I was passing by.
Kind of seemed like you were
just gonna keep on going.
No.
Of course now. How--
Well...
can't be too careful.
You worried I was some sort
of deranged maniac?
I...
I-I-I...
I didn't mean
anything like that.
How did you mean it?
What?
How did you mean it?
Well...
guess I didn't--
Didn't mean anything.
Maybe you should.
Should what?
Mean something.
Maybe you're right.
Oh, me, I'm...
I'm just messing with you,
buddy.
Oh, man.
You should see your face
right now.
Oh, man.
Of course,
the same goes for you.
What's that?
I could be the dangerous one,
bro, you know?
Yeah, okay.
Maybe I punched a hole
in your radiator
back at that gas station.
Well, why'd you do that?
I wouldn't.
Of course.
Just for example.
Maybe so you'd break down.
What?
Maybe so you'd break down
and I'd have to pick you up.
Why would you want
to pick me up?
I don't know. No reason.
Maybe so I could kill you.
So you could kill me?
Not really.
Just saying, you never know.
Maybe someone paid me
to kill you.
Who'd hire you to kill me?
No one. No one.
Just for example,
maybe your wife.
-My wife?
-Or ex-wife. I don't know.
Maybe she wants you dead.
Don't listen to me.
I'm just making small talk.
Maybe there's a custody battle.
Maybe she doesn't want you
anywhere near her kids.
Maybe it's cheaper
to have you killed
than to hire a lawyer.
They're very expensive.
You'd be surprised.
Just... for example.
You, uh...
You need to--
You need to stop this car.
What?
You need to stop
this fucking car.
Your face.
Yeah?
When?
Where's LaRoy?
Ray!
Ray, over here!
Skip?
Have a seat, amigo.
I didn't know
if you'd recognize me.
I used to hang
with your brother some.
Oh, yeah, right.
We played pool together.
Eight ball, corner pocket,
cutthroat.
Uh, mostly eight ball,
but good times.
He ever mention me?
I don't think so.
Hmm.
Did you send me this?
I did, yes.
Um...
I thought--
I thought it would be best
if we met somewhere discreet.
Do you want something to eat?
-Hey, come on.
-Meet about what?
Um, okay, we can just dive
right in if you want.
Um...
I don't know if you've heard...
but I'm a private
detective now.
-No, I hadn't heard.
-Yeah.
You know, I do big cases,
small cases, medium-sized cases.
And, uh, I was on a stakeout
the other day
at the, uh, Velvet Saddle.
You know it?
Can't say I do.
A little motel
out there past Brillo.
-Hmm.
-Basically a dump.
Um, but people use it
for illicit activities,
including, um...
how should I say it?
Intimate...
rendezvous...
rendezvous of the sexual nature,
if you know what I mean.
Okay, well, anyway,
so I'm on this case.
Divorce case.
Can't tell you who it is.
But...
Unless you want to know.
-No, that's okay.
-Okay.
Well, I'm on this case, and...
I saw something that,
uh, I think...
you might find interesting.
What is this?
Yeah, I was like,
"Is that Stacy-Lynn Wright?
Wait, I know that girl."
And then I was like,
"Hey, isn't she married
to Ray Jepson?"
I'm not quite sure,
because I wasn't invited
to the wedding,
but, yeah, yeah, no,
I know her.
I know what
you're going through, amigo.
I just got out of a, you know,
real serious relationship.
It's tough. At least you--
Goddamn it!
Hey! Hey!
Wait!
Oh...
What the hell, Brett?
Oh, I guess you shouldn't have
parked in a handicapped spot.
I wasn't parked
in a handicapped spot.
They don't even have
a handicapped spot!
Dick!
Assholes.
You know, just because I don't
have a badge, they think that...
I'm not a real detective.
Who was she with?
Who?
Oh, I don't know.
I don't know.
I had to leave before she--
She came out.
She was in there a while.
Why did you take these?
What do you mean?
Why did you take these pictures?
I told you, because
I'm a private detective.
-Did I hire you to take them?
-No.
Did she hire you to take them?
Did she hire me
to take pictures of herself?
No.
Did anyone hire you
to take these pictures?
No. Like I said,
I was on a stakeout.
Right. Well, maybe next time
you'll mind your own business.
How'd it go?
Uh, good.
Yeah, good.
So you think she's got a shot?
Oh, absolutely.
Does she have any other talents?
Why? You don't think
she's good?
No, mnh-mnh. It's not that.
Um, it's just...
a lot of the girls sing
for their talent.
Sometimes it's good
to stand out.
Well, none of them can sing
as good as she can.
I'm sure of that.
Uh-huh.
Oh, um, we'll work on some
interview questions next week.
Where the hell you been?
Sorry.
We're gonna be late.
What are you waiting for?
Go!
A beauty salon?
Yes, sir.
It's a lot of money.
Well, it's gonna be
cutting edge.
All the latest styles
and techniques.
We won't just be cutting hair.
We'll be changing lives.
Is that extra?
-What?
-Changing lives?
No, uh, that's included
in the price.
Do you have any experience
running a salon?
Not exactly, but I coach
young beauty contestants.
I'm a former winner myself.
Beaux County, 2008.
Huh. Is that so?
So I know a thing or two
about beauty.
Well, sure.
It's just...
It's a lot of money,
and you don't have
any business experience.
No, but Ray does.
He and his brother
run his family's store,
Jepson's Home and Hardware.
And they've been open
how long now?
What?
How long's the store
been open?
-Forty-three years.
-Forty-three years.
Now, that's got to count
for something.
Sure. Sure.
I'll never forget
the day I won my crown.
Up on that stage.
Lights all shining.
The audience cheering
as they placed it on my head.
It was the happiest moment
of my whole life.
I want to share that feeling.
I want every woman
who leaves my salon
feeling like
she was just crowned
the beauty queen of LaRoy.
That's sweet.
I like that.
You're a lot of goddamn help
back there.
Sorry.
Guess my professional ambitions
don't interest you.
-We'll get the money.
-How?
I don't know,
but we'll find a way.
What the hell's that?
-Hmm.
-Hmm.
Not bad, huh?
Twelve-inch touch display.
Electric wind block.
The wave is ridiculous.
Jeez, how much
you spend on this?
Nah, I got a deal.
Come on, everyone's out back.
Now, Ray couldn't talk to girls.
I mean, like, not at all.
He couldn't say "boo"
if there were a pair of panties
within a hundred feet.
But he had this huge crush
on Sara Fixler.
She was this, uh,
this gothy vampire chick.
So we're at this party,
and Ray asks if I wouldn't mind
talking to her for him.
So I say, "Sure."
I mean, I want to help
my baby bro out, right?
And I swear to God,
that's all I was planning
on doing.
But this girl,
she is a total freak.
And she's so grateful that
I'm just, like, talking to her.
She starts coming on to me.
Big-time.
I mean, she's all over me.
Oh, what-- What was I gonna do?
Right?
Poor Ray comes in, catches us.
And lo and behold,
suddenly he can speak!
He shouts...
You remember what you said, Ray?
It was a long time ago, Junior.
He shouts, "You were
supposed to talk to her,
not finger-bang her!"
God, Junior!
What's finger-bang?
Oh, sweetie, um...
it's kind of like a high five.
Sara wasn't a vampire.
She just liked
to dye her hair sometimes.
I'm going to bed.
Stacy-Lynn.
I'm gonna get that money.
I promise.
You know, everyone thought
Kelly Capshaw
was gonna win that crown.
She was the runner-up
the year before.
Had all the judges
tied around her finger.
But then I played
"American Girl" on the flute,
and it brought down
the goddamn house.
I knew right then
I was going places.
Chad?
I thought we were putting
the display by the register.
Junior said
it looks better here.
But I told you
to put it by the register.
Then Junior said
to put it here.
I told Chad to put the display
by the register.
Hmm, I think it's better
by the doors.
Can I talk to you
about something?
Can it wait? I got a call.
I need money.
For what?
Stacy-Lynn
wants to open a salon.
She's got it all worked out.
It's gonna be real nice.
Well, uh, what can I do
about it?
Tell me, when was the last time
we gave ourselves a raise?
A raise?
Well, we can't go around
giving ourselves raises
whenever we feel like it.
Well...
how much do you make?
I make the same as you, Ray.
We're partners, remember?
How come your house
is so much bigger than mine?
How come you can afford a boat?
I told you, I got a deal.
I'm what they call
business savvy.
That's why I work
behind the scenes
and you manage the floor.
But you're always
contradicting me.
How's anyone supposed
to respect me?
You're right.
You know, I'll go tell Chad
to move the display.
No, no, you go tell him.
Tell him I said it was okay.
It's not about the display.
I need money.
Stacy-Lynn is not happy.
I think she's...
You think she what?
She's just not happy.
Stacy-Lynn?
- Yeah?
- Brought dinner.
Where are you going?
To see a movie.
With who?
Becky.
Why are you all dressed up?
Because I want to look nice.
Is there something wrong
with that?
Do you know
when you'll be back?
Probably late.
Just...
eat your pizza.
Oh, I talked to Junior about
borrowing money from the store.
What'd he say?
It's not a good time.
Jesus.
I'm gonna be late.
I'd like to buy a gun.
Sure. What kind?
I don't know.
This is a popular one,
depending what you need it for.
Uh, excuse me.
So, what do you think?
I think I need
something shorter.
You're early.
-I am?
-So, uh...
how do we do this, man?
Do we like--
Hey, what's with
the fucking gun, man?
Oh, I was just, um...
I don't-- Excuse me.
Here.
- All right.
- Sorry.
That's half, all right?
-Half?
-You can count it if you want,
but it's all there.
Well, half of it's there.
Like I said, it's half.
Listen, man, this thing
is time-sensitive.
That's the main thing.
It's got to be done tomorrow,
or the whole thing
gets thrown off.
I don't care how you do it.
It's just got
to be done tomorrow.
How are you gonna do it?
Hmm? Are you gonna shoot him?
Hmm? Are you gonna
poison his coffee,
or are you gonna blow up
his car?
Obviously, you're not gonna
blow up his car.
Shit, man. Maybe you are, huh?
I don't know. You're the expert.
Oh, God.
You know what?
I don't fucking want to know.
Just get it done,
and get it done tomorrow.
-All right?
-Wait, wait, wait.
I can't do it tomorrow.
What?
I'm busy tomorrow.
What are you talking about?
Look, I-I... I'm...
I'm sorry.
Are you serious? Huh?
Hey, man, we had a fucking deal.
This is time-sensitive.
I'm sorry.
Jesus fucking Christ!
They said you were some kind
of fucking badass!
They did?
Said you were
this scary fucking killer.
You don't look like
a scary killer to me.
You look like
a goddamn pushover!
I'm not.
Not what?
A pushover.
Well, which is it, then?
Which is what?
Are you a...
scary fucking badass?
Or aren't you?
Yeah.
Excuse me?
Yeah.
I am.
Good.
It's got to be done,
and it's got to be done
tomorrow.
All right?
Jesus fucking Christ.
-How was the movie?
-Jesus!
You scared the shit out of me.
What'd you see?
What?
What did you see?
I forgot the name.
I'm going to bed.
He didn't show.
Give a name?
What number did he call from?
All right.
Hi.
I'm here to pick up my car.
It's an '87 Crown Vic.
Two-eighteen.
Two dollars and eighteen cents,
or $218?
The second.
Are you kidding me?
You were parked
in a handicapped spot.
-That was a joke.
-Handicaps use those spots.
I...
Yes, I know that they use
those spots.
I wasn't parked
in a handicapped spot.
That's what I'm trying
to tell you.
The cops, they were just
messing with me.
They don't even have
a handicapped spot,
so how could I be parked
in one?
It's 218.
What...
Sign here.
Where are the tires?
Doesn't have any.
I know it doesn't have any!
I can see it doesn't have
any tires!
I'm wondering why
it doesn't have any tires!
Hey, we got ya!
-Suck a dick!
-Whoo!
I don't see what's so important
about a badge.
You know who else wears badges?
Girl Scouts.
You see them out solving crimes?
I seriously doubt it.
Hey, what'd you say
your name was again?
Hey, you made it.
Oh. Yeah. Okay, cool.
See you later!
Damn.
Hey.
Hey, amigo!
Never seen you in here before.
I felt like a drink.
Drink my ass!
You're in here for some action
after breaking up
with that cheating bitch
wife of yours.
Well, you know what?
You're in luck,
because I just happen to be
an excellent wingman.
So, let's see
what we got going on here.
We didn't break up.
And she's not a bitch.
Oh, wait. Let me guess.
she, uh, started to cry,
and then she said,
"It didn't mean anything,
I swear.
Never happen again.
Blah, blah, blah."
Actually, we haven't
talked about it yet.
Why not?
It wasn't a good time.
Well, I would argue that
it wasn't a good time for her
to go screw some other guy.
But that didn't seem
to stop her.
You know, this is none
of your business.
Factually speaking,
it is my business.
Um, although, honestly,
not partial to divorce cases.
Damn it. I gotta go.
Hey, I got you a beer!
Hey.
Who are you?
No one.
Why are you following me?
-I wasn't.
-Bullshit.
Who's she?
Give me those!
Why are you following me?
I wasn't.
Did somebody hire you?
No. No! Ah!
I wasn't gonna do it!
-Do what?
-Nothing.
What are you gonna do? Huh?
What are you gonna do?
Why are you following me?
Who hired you?
Who fucking hired you?
What the hell, Ray?
I'm sorry, Kayla.
I need to talk to Junior.
Okay, well, he's not home.
Do you know where he is?
Well, it's the middle
of the night,
so if I had to guess,
he's probably out
fucking his girlfriend.
How'd you find out?
I suspected for a while.
Have you talked to him?
What's the point? He'd just lie.
Well, how do you know that?
Because he's a fucking liar,
Ray.
Who's the girl?
Jesus. Do you really not know?
What?
It's Stacy-Lynn.
What?
My husband and your wife
are having an affair.
No. No way.
He's probably got his dick
up her ass right now.
Stacy-Lynn wouldn't do that.
What, anal?
Hmm, don't be so sure.
Junior can be very persuasive.
I mean, she wouldn't cheat on me
with my own brother.
Oh, okay, so you're saying
she's home right now?
Want to give her a call,
find out?
He used to be
so much more discreet.
Now he's just getting lazy.
You know...
...I found this in his laundry.
4311.
You're assigned
to a vandalism case.
835 Hatter, do you copy?
10-4.
No.
Why are you
being so difficult?
- I'm not.
- Just sit with us.
-I said no.
-Come on.
I can't. I have to go.
Just come here. What?
Come on. Where are you going?
-How are we doing?
-Fine.
What you got there?
Ah.
It's a police scanner.
Just a little hobby.
It's good to have hobbies.
Keeps your mind active.
I, um...
I noticed those men
were bothering you.
Oh, they get a little
rowdy sometimes.
It's just part of the job.
Why is it part of the job?
I...
I don't know. It just is.
People only see
what we let them.
Excuse me?
If we want people
to respect us,
we need to give them a reason.
Maybe you could
teach them some manners.
-You want me to hurt them?
-What?
Do you want me
to hurt those men for you?
Are you serious?
Isn't that
what you're asking?
People only get away
with what we let them.
But you have to be sure.
There's no changing
your mind on this.
Once you ask me to hurt them,
that's what I'm gonna do.
It's important to finish things
once we start them,
don't you think?
I...
I'd better get back
to the kitchen.
45 to 41,
we got a call about a body
out on Swift Creek Road.
Unidentified male,
late 40s, early 50s.
What's the address?
Unclear.
Witness is no longer at scene.
10-4, we're on our way.
Everything okay?
Yes, sir. You can't stop here.
It's a crime scene.
Gosh. What-- What kind of crime?
-Homicide.
-Sir, you gotta keep moving.
Okay. Okay.
Who's the victim?
James Barlow. You know him?
- No. How did he die?
- Sir!
Lady hit him with her car.
But most likely,
he was already dead.
-Gunshot.
-Shut the fuck up, Potter.
Sir, you gotta keep moving,
all right?
Uh, sure.
You officers have a--
Have a good night.
What the fuck's wrong with you?
What?
...about your height.
He's kind of like
a gentle-looking guy.
Oh, okay, yeah.
Ray, right?
Yeah, that sounds like Ray.
Oh, yeah, that's--
-He's probably over there.
-Is that the guy?
Where's the money?
-What money?
-The money from the safe.
I don't know
what you're talking about.
How did you find me here?
The name of this place
is on your shirt, Ray.
Oh, God.
-God!
-Don't fuck with me, Ray.
Do not fuck with me.
Okay! Okay, okay.
Tell me where the money is.
What money?
Barlow had money in the safe.
Nobody else knew about it, Ray.
I don't know about it.
I said don't fuck with me, Ray.
-Ah!
-Don't do it!
God!
Uh, Ray?
Can I take my break now?
Yeah, Chad, that's fine.
Okay.
You've got 24 hours
to give me that money,
or I make an anonymous
phone call to the police
and I tell them
who killed James Barlow.
All right, Ray?
Miss Jepson?
Yeah?
I'm Officer Stevens.
This is Officer Potter.
Okay?
Hey. Hey, what are you doing?
Get away from there.
Hey, did you hear the news?
What news?
Somebody killed James Barlow.
Who's that?
He's a lawyer.
He was actually
at the bar last night.
-Oh, really?
-Yeah.
I thought you might
find that interesting.
And why is that?
Because I saw you
follow him out.
Here she comes.
Thank you.
-I didn't mean to kill him.
-You shot him in the head.
What'd you think
was gonna happen?
No, no, no. He was attacking me.
So that was self-defense.
You were hired to kill him.
That was a mistake.
-How much did they pay you?
-Nothing.
A few thousand dollars.
I didn't do it for the money.
I wasn't even
gonna go through with it.
I just wanted to know
what it felt like.
What?
I don't know.
To not be a pushover.
That's a weird reason
to want to kill someone, Ray.
Look, this is a conundrum,
a real conundrum.
On the one hand,
the police would love
to know what I know.
They might even
give me a badge,
make me an honorary
member of the force,
I don't know.
On the other hand...
I still don't know
all the facts.
-Right.
-Right.
Guess there's only
one thing left to do.
What?
I'm taking the case.
What case?
There is no case.
Excuse me, Ray, I think I know
a case when I see one.
This guy hired you
to kill Barlow, did he not?
Can you please be quiet?
And Barlow had some money
that he thinks you stole.
-Sure.
-But somebody else must have.
I guess.
Now you have
to find the said money,
or this guy is gonna
turn you in to the police.
Right.
Um, sounds like
a case to me, Ray.
Look, I appreciate it,
but I don't think
I need any help.
Yes, you do.
Skip, please, just--
You need a professional
in this.
You're not even
a real detective.
That's what you think?
I didn't mean it like that.
You know what?
The way I see it,
you got two options.
You let me solve this.
And when I go down
to the police
and convince those assholes
that I'm a real detective,
maybe I'll leave
your name out of it.
Or...
I go down to the station
right now.
Tell them everything I know
about the last known
whereabouts of James Barlow.
Your call, amigo.
I'm looking for a guy.
He drives a rusty brown
pickup truck.
You know him?
Why you looking for him?
It's a private matter.
Sorry, can't help you.
It's important that I find him.
We don't give out customers'
personal information.
I...
Sorry.
Uh... God, this is so
embarrassing.
I was here the other night,
and I think I hit his truck.
No.
I did hit his truck.
I don't usually go
to places like this.
I... I...
I was embarrassed, and I didn't
want to have to explain.
You know,
and I just kept driving.
I felt terrible about it
the next day.
I didn't know
how to get a hold of him.
I'm just trying
to do the right thing.
Can you help me?
Name, phone number, something?
Talk to Angie.
Which one is Angie?
So, this is where he works, huh?
Yeah, I think so.
His name's on the sign.
All right, just follow my lead.
Look, I think it's better
if I just do the talking.
I'm sorry, uh, my secretary
went home for the day.
I'm afraid we had some bad news.
What can I do for you?
-Well, sir...
-Well, you see...
That's actually why we're here.
Do you mind if we ask you some
questions about James Barlow?
I'm so sorry for your loss.
Thank you. The whole thing's
been quite a shock.
Ask him where he was last night.
Did your partner have
any enemies that you know of?
Enemies? No, I--
I don't think so.
-Ask him where he was--
-Shh!
Uh, did you notice
anything unusual?
In what way?
I don't know. In any way?
Not really, no.
Ask him where he was last night.
Just let me do this. I can talk.
I-I-I'm sorry, did you say
you're from the police?
Uh, no, sir.
We're not really here
in any official capacity.
-Yes, we are. We are official.
-No, we are not.
-Why are you here?
-Where were you last night?
Okay, I'm gonna ask you
to leave.
I'm afraid we can't do that.
I'm afraid I'm gonna
have to insist,
unless you'd like me
to call the police.
Um, I understand.
But before we go,
is it okay if I use
your bathroom?
Make it quick.
What are you doing? Get off me!
Get your hands--
-Where's the money, asshole?
-What are you doing?
This guy knows something.
I can see it in his eyes.
Are you saying something?
I can't quite hear you!
-You're gonna drown him.
-I'm not gonna drown him.
It takes two minutes
for the brain to lose any...
Do you know CPR?
One, two, three, four,
five, six, seven, eight,
nine, ten, eleven, twelve.
Ah!
You okay? You're okay.
-What was Barlow up to?
-I don't know.
Huh? Who is he
mixed up with, huh?
I have no idea!
He doesn't know anything.
We'll see. We'll see.
Where'd the money
come from, huh? Huh?
How did Barlow get the money?
You're gonna drown him again!
Will you relax?
I've got this, okay?
Goddamn it!
Oh, there you go.
Yeah. Yeah. There you go.
Get it out. You're okay.
You're okay. He's okay.
Thanks, amigo.
Who wanted Barlow dead?
I don't know.
No, no, no! Okay, okay, okay!
I know-- I know one thing.
I-I-I-- I heard him
talking to a client.
Uh, uh, something about--
about blackmail.
Okay, who was the client?
It's attorney-client privilege--
Okay! Okay!
Adam. Adam LeDoux!
The car guy?
Goddamn, we make a good team!
We should think about
partnering up full time.
What the hell was that?
What?
You can't just go around
drowning people.
I'm not "going around
drowning people."
That was one guy.
You could have killed that man.
Well, technically, I did. Twice.
But come on, man.
Everything's fine.
He's gonna be okay.
We just got our first lead.
How can you not be excited
about this?
Hello?
Excuse me, I'm here to see
my wife, Stacy-Lynn Jepson.
Come with me.
And you stay here.
Have a seat right there.
Right there.
What are you doing here?
Working the James Barlow case.
-Oh, yeah?
-That's right.
Huh.
I already got a couple leads.
Maybe sometime
we could exchange notes.
Yeah, sure.
I got a note for you.
How about you, uh, fuck off.
Leave the detective work
to the real detectives.
Hmm.
Mr. Jepson?
Where is my wife?
She's down the hall.
She's fine.
Why is she here?
Do you know a James Barlow?
No.
- Does your wife know him?
- Of course not.
Why "of course not"?
I mean, I don't know him,
so I'm sure she doesn't either.
Why? Who is he?
He's a lawyer.
He was found dead this morning.
Run over and shot in the head.
Run over?
And shot in the head.
Well...
I don't understand.
What does this have to do
with Stacy-Lynn?
That's what we're trying
to figure out.
Mr. Barlow had a photograph
of your wife
when he was found dead.
Can you think of any reason
why this man
might have a photograph
of your wife?
No.
Hmm.
What's he doing here?
Um, last I checked, uh,
I was picking your ass up
from the police station.
My car broke down.
He gave me a ride.
-Why is he dressed like that?
-You know, I'm right here.
Um, this is my uniform,
and my clients expect
a certain par excellence, so...
You look like you're going
to cowboy prom.
Am I dropping you at home,
or is there a motel
that you'd like to go to?
I'll see you later, honey.
Damn, man.
I gotta hand it to you.
Leaving your wife's photo
at the crime scene,
that is some
cold-blooded shit, man!
I didn't leave it there.
Okay, Whatever you say.
-Must have fallen out.
-Mm-hmm. Yeah.
Well, either way,
it's nice for you.
Police think she killed Barlow.
All you got to do
is let her take the blame now.
That's my wife.
Yeah.
Your lying, cheating wife.
And she didn't kill anyone.
No, but she broke your heart.
And in a lot of ways,
that's a lot worse.
I'm not framing my wife!
Okay, fine! It's just a thought.
God, you want to look
a gift horse in the mouth?
Be my guest.
-Do you like camping?
-What?
You know, like tents and shit?
'Cause I know
this great fishing place
down by Shafter,
and I was thinking
after we solve this thing,
we should, you know,
go down there for a few days.
What are you talking about?
I'm talking about camping.
You realize my wife just
got questioned by the police?
Yeah, I know,
that's why I'm saying.
You seem very stressed,
and I think you should take
a little time to yourself.
With a friend.
Just stay here, okay?
I'm not staying here.
You stay here.
This is my life.
Do you understand that?
-Yes, I understand.
-And I don't need you
screwing it up
any more than it already is.
Oh, you think you can do this
all by yourself? Go ahead!
Fishing trip off!
Oh, welcome
to LeDoux Family Auto.
How can we help you today?
I need to speak to Mr. LeDoux.
Well, he's busy at the moment.
Would you like to speak
with one of our associates?
I'll wait.
What the fuck did you do?
What are you talking about?
Who are you?
Sit.
What do you want?
You asked me to come.
What are you talking about?
The killing
doesn't take too long.
Most of the job
is driving around,
sleeping in dirty motels,
eating bad food.
So how I see it,
by the time I got here,
most of the job was done.
It was discourteous of you
not to respect that.
Who the fuck are you?
I'm gonna ask
some questions now.
Put your hand on the table.
Fuck you.
Why did you want
James Barlow killed?
I didn't...
You piece of shit!
You killed him?
No!
I swear to God!
I paid--
I paid someone to do it.
What the fuck were you thinking?
Put it back.
Fuck you!
Who killed James Barlow?
Who the fuck are you?
Thing of beauty, ain't she?
450 horsepower.
Premium leather interior.
Ultra premium sound system.
I might be able
to get you a deal.
I know the boss.
Adam LeDoux.
I'm not buying a car.
Excuse me?
I'm not here to buy a car.
Okay, then, uh,
what can I do for you?
I'm here about the blackmail.
Get out before I break
your goddamn neck.
-No, no, no, sir, please--
-Get out!
How'd it go?
He said to come back later.
Later? When later?
Can we just go talk
to someone else?
Who? We don't have
any other leads.
I don't know.
You're the detective.
Oh, now I'm the detective.
Oh, shit...
Where's my goddamn money?
Nice work, Ray.
Where the hell you been?
I've been sitting around
in my underwear like an asshole.
The police just brought me in
for questioning.
About what?
Some guy got shot last night.
-Who?
-Some lawyer.
Never met him in my life.
Someone killed him
and broke into his safe.
Well, how much did they get?
How do I know?
Whoa, what's this got
to do with you?
He was carrying around
a picture of me
when he died.
What kind of picture?
A picture me
walking into this shithole.
What? Why?
Hell if I know!
Well, what'd you tell
the police?
I didn't tell them anything.
What could I tell them?
Well, you didn't say anything
about me, did you?
A dead man is carrying around
a photograph of me,
and you're worried
about yourself?
N-No, of course not.
Come on.
Does Ray know?
I don't know.
He was acting all weird.
He didn't say nothing.
You think you can threaten me?
No, no, no, sir,
I wasn't trying to threaten you.
You think you can come
in my place of business
and threaten me?
You said not to talk.
-Where's my money?
-We don't have it.
- Well, who does?
- We don't know.
The hell you don't.
You got about three seconds
before I-I start...
Oh, goddamn it!
Is everything all right?
Everything's fine, sweetie.
We're just having
a little meeting.
-You want some coffee?
-No, no, no.
We're fine. Just go inside now.
I'll be right in.
All right.
Who are you?
And don't bullshit me.
Am I allowed to talk?
Easy!
I'm just getting my cards.
- Private detective?
- That's right.
You need security,
executive protection.
You give me a call.
You spelled "detective" wrong.
Son of a bitch.
Who do you work for?
We don't work for anyone.
Well, then, what's
your interest in this?
The police think that my wife
had something to do
with James Barlow's death.
- Did she?
- No!
She never even met him.
Look, we just want to get to
the bottom of this, that's all.
How much do you know?
We know that you were
being blackmailed,
and that James Barlow
got killed because of it.
Hell, I didn't have anything
to do with that!
Now, I've got plenty
of witnesses that can tell...
Goddamn it!
-I said no coffee.
-Well, it's for them.
Okay.
Thank you.
Mm! Thank you, ma'am.
Go back inside now, sweetie.
Let us finish our meeting.
Well, now, do you need
anything else?
We're just fine.
I'll be in in a minute.
My wife.
This whole thing's
been damn hard on her.
Look, anything you could tell us
will be helpful.
A few months ago,
I had an affair.
There was this...
woman.
She was young and attractive,
and I was stupid.
Well, I felt guilty as hell.
But when I tried to call it off,
she decided to blackmail me.
Said if I didn't pay her
$250,000,
she was gonna tell
about the affair.
- So, what'd you do?
- Well, what could I do?
I told my wife.
we thought it would be better
just to pay the money.
But if she knew
about the affair,
then why did you pay her?
People know me.
I'm a family man.
Hell, it says so
on the damn sign.
"LeDoux Family Autos."
That matters to people.
Folks come here
because they trust me.
I mean, what are they gonna say
if they think I'm some kind
of goddamn philanderer?
Well, when did
the lawyer come in?
He was supposed
to give the girl the money.
But before he could,
some asshole murdered him
and broke open his safe.
Well, who else
has the combination?
How do I know?
Hell, you're the goddamn
professionals.
You tell me.
Do you think you, uh...
You think you can find
the money?
I guess we should talk
to this girl first.
What's her name?
Angie.
At least that's what she said
her name was.
She's an exotic dancer
over at the, uh, Sunset Lounge.
Goddamn it!
Redhead? Great ass?
Yeah. You know her?
Yeah, I know her.
This is the serious
relationship?
Yep.
What happened?
Um...
I just needed
to focus on my career.
Kind of broke her heart,
I think.
And, uh, I just...
I just hope she's over it,
that's all.
Hey! What the hell, Angie?
- Who's that?
- It's me!
-Skip?
-Yes!
Don't mind the mess.
Who the hell is that?
That's Brian.
That's the guy who hired me.
Wait. "Brian" Brian?
The guy you dumped me for?
Wait, I thought you said
you broke up with her.
Ha! I went out with him one time
because I felt sorry for him.
I can't believe you ditched me
for this guy.
-He looks like an asshole.
-He was an asshole.
But at least he didn't dress
like Howdy fucking Doody.
What happened to him?
He got shot.
- I can see that. Who shot him?
- I don't know.
I was too busy getting the shit
kicked out of me.
God, I need a cigarette.
Angie, where's the money?
What money?
Cut the bullshit.
We talked to LeDoux.
He told us all about
your little blackmail scheme.
You don't know a damn thing.
Oh, I do. I think I know a lot.
Oh, yeah?
Well, how about this?
I didn't blackmail LeDoux.
He hired me.
Hired you for what?
He was a regular at the club.
I used to give him
private dances.
You were sleeping with LeDoux
while we were together?
We were never together,
first of all.
Second, I never slept
with LeDoux.
What do you mean?
Who the fuck is that?
Wait, what do you mean
you never slept with LeDoux?
I mean I never slept with him.
He had this plan
to get $250,000.
Said he'd give me 10%
if I pretended to blackmail him.
Wait, blackmail himself?
That doesn't make any sense.
It does if it's not his money.
Which it wasn't.
He likes to pretend
he's all important,
but his wife's the rich one.
Some kind of heiress
or something.
I was supposed to pretend
like I was blackmailing him,
and when she paid, I was
supposed to give it to him.
So, what happened?
Dipshit over there
is what happened.
He decided 10% wasn't enough,
so he found someone
to kill the dude's lawyer,
take the whole damn thing
for himself.
But then he goes
and hires the wrong guy.
Gives the payment
to some fucking imbecile
from the hardware store.
Next thing I know,
real killer shows up at my door.
Guy's some kind
of goddamn maniac.
What did he want?
He wants the money.
All of it.
Says he's owed for his troubles.
Hey, whoa, whoa, whoa.
Wait, where are you going?
-To find Stacy-Lynn.
-What? Now?
Did you not see inside there?
This guy's a maniac.
Yeah, who cares? All we have
to do is find the money first.
I don't care about the money.
I only care about my wife.
What do you think it means?
I think Ray had something to do
with him getting killed.
Come on. Ray?
He's got the man's name
and address
along with a pile of cash
shoved in his underwear drawer.
You got a better explanation?
Maybe he's holding it
for a friend.
No, Ray doesn't have
any friends.
Well, yeah.
But how much is it?
A few thousand.
You think it's the money
from the safe?
Maybe some of it.
It just doesn't seem like enough
to kill somebody over.
Well, where's the rest?
Stacy-Lynn!
Stacy-Lynn!
Stacy!
She's not here.
- I'm sure she's fine!
- I have to find her.
I have to get her out of town
before something happens to her.
How do you know
she'll go with you?
- What?
- You're leaving town?
How do you know that Stacy-Lynn
will go with you?
She's my wife.
Exactly.
She hasn't been
the most loyal person.
What are you gonna do?
You just tell her what happened,
she's gonna drop everything
and run away with you?
I should have just
killed myself.
Man, you got to stop it
with these sad mopey routine.
Chicks don't like it.
How do you know what they like?
Well, I know they like
a man who's assertive.
I know they don't like
some sad sack
who goes around talking about
his ex-wife all the time.
She's not my ex-wife.
Whatever.
Look, you know what?
I think this is the best thing
to ever happen to you.
Mm-hmm. Okay, did you
accidentally shoot a man?
Yes. Did you do a terrible job
at trying to hide the body?
Also, yes.
But if you hadn't,
we wouldn't have teamed up
and had this
kick-ass adventure together.
Come on, man!
We're, like, finding clues
and solving crimes
and making memories.
Why does Junior
get whatever he wants?
Why can't I just get one thing?
Let me tell you something
about your brother.
He's an asshole.
He's always been an asshole.
You're twice the man he is.
Yeah!
Look, I know what it's like
to not be taken seriously, okay?
I know people laugh at me.
Don't respect what I do.
But that's about to change
for the both of us.
When we find that money,
we're gonna be heroes.
LeDoux might even
throw in a reward.
Stacy-Lynn, she's gonna
crawl back to you
and beg for forgiveness.
Trust me, man.
Now I'm gonna go take a piss.
And when I'm done,
we're gonna go out
and solve this thing
because we're this close.
I can feel it! Come on! Yeah!
Yes!
What'd you do?
I don't know!
Wait, who are they?
They work for Mrs. LeDoux.
She wants to talk to us.
Okay. Sorry. My bad.
Sorry.
Sit.
Oh, do you have
anything to drink?
-Sit the fuck down.
-Right.
Oh, thank you for coming.
Can I get you
something to drink?
Yeah, I would, actually...
They're fine.
Elijah, what happened
to your head?
Oh, um, there was a slight
misunderstanding.
Oh! Well, what kind
of misunderstanding?
Well, ma'am,
Elijah here thought
that he wasn't a little bitch,
and I thought he was.
I understand you're working
with my husband.
We... have similar interests.
And have you found
anything interesting?
We haven't
found your money,
if that's what you're asking.
We're still trying to figure out
who broke into Barlow's safe.
That was me.
Excuse me?
I'm the one that broke
into the safe.
That's why I asked you here,
'cause I thought
that might help
with your investigation.
Oh, so you have the money?
Oh, no.
Uh, the safe was empty,
unfortunately.
Well-- Well,
I don't understand.
My husband has certain...
weaknesses.
In his case,
it's women and, uh, gambling.
I've, uh--
I've paid off his debt
more times than I can count.
My daddy left me
a large inheritance.
But there's a limit, and...
well, finally, I...
I had to cut him off.
So he concocted this ridiculous
blackmailing scheme.
So you knew
he wasn't having an affair?
Well, not at first,
but eventually.
And I didn't want
another fight, so...
I tried to take
the money back myself.
I-I asked Elijah and Felix
to break
into Mr. Barlow's house.
But like I said before,
the money wasn't there.
Well, where was it?
I wish I knew.
I-- I would appreciate it
if you could keep
this all discreet.
Oh, ma'am, we--
We're known for our discretion.
Why do you put up with it?
I beg your pardon?
Why do you let him
make you look like a fool?
Don't you get sick of that?
Hey, mind your own business!
No, it's okay.
Of course I do.
But he's my husband.
Eventually, he's gonna
tire himself out
and come back to me
like he always does.
And I'll be here.
Don't you ever think
that you deserve better?
What's deserve
got to do with it?
I'm just trying to get whatever
scrap of happiness I can
in this life.
I stopped believing
in fairy tales a long time ago.
So LeDoux hires Angie
to fake like
she's blackmailing him.
But Angie's asshole boyfriend,
he wants to keep the ransom
all to himself.
So he hires you to kill Barlow
so he can keep the money.
Meanwhile, Mrs. LeDoux
has already broken
into Barlow's safe,
and the money isn't there, so...
who has the money?
Maybe no one.
I know where the money is.
This is where he parked.
[Skip Yeah, so what?
So he had a briefcase,
but he didn't take it
into the bar.
What, you're telling me
he had, like, $250,000
he just left in his car?
I'm telling you,
I think that he knew
I was following him.
Yeah, okay, well,
it's not here now, so...
I got to take a leak.
Oh, shit!
What?
Coming?
That's it.
You got it?
Yeah, I got it.
-Do you got it?
-Yeah, I got it.
Ass!
What are you doing?
Where are you going?
No!
Yeah!
Hoo!
Are you kidding me?
Who's the detective now,
Brett, huh?
Who's the goddamn detective now?
Whoo-hoo-hoo-hoo!
Yeah!
What are you doing?
We can't turn it in.
Yeah, of course we can.
We found it first.
It's the only way.
Way for what?
That she'll go with me.
Stacy-Lynn?
Wait, you're gonna screw me over
for that bitch?
-Don't call her that!
-Hey, you know what?
It's time you heard
the hard truth, amigo.
Stacy-Lynn doesn't love you.
She probably never did.
And 250,000 cash
is not gonna change that.
-You don't even know her.
-Oh, I do.
I-I see people like her
every day.
I'm probably an expert.
And you know what?
You're better off without her.
You don't know anything.
You only date strippers,
and even that
you have to lie about.
You wouldn't even be out here
if it wasn't for me.
You think you could have
found this all by yourself?
Huh? You're not even
a detective.
Neither are you!
You take dirty pictures!
You think that makes you
a detective?
It doesn't.
It makes you a joke.
Well...
Man...
I thought we were friends.
We're not.
I never asked you
for your help.
She was a beauty queen.
She could've had anyone,
but she chose me.
Why? Hmm?
Ever ask yourself that?
Why'd she choose you?
Ray?
Where are you?
Where are you?
I got the money.
What?
For the salon.
I got the money.
I told you I'd get it, didn't I?
Ray, where are you?
Baby, I have so much
I have to tell you,
but I can't do it
over the phone.
Where can we meet?
At the house.
Yeah.
All right.
I'm heading there now.
I'll see you soon.
I love you.
Why is he here?
I was worried about you,
baby bro.
I don't need you
to worry about me.
Ray, we're both worried.
I found this.
I was gonna tell you about that.
- We just want to help.
- No, I don't need your help!
Stay out of this!
I got the money for us.
I got the money.
I love you.
I love you, Stacy-Lynn.
I love you too.
Okay? And...
We did this for you.
Did what?
Did what, Stacy-Lynn?
Stay strong, honey!
41 to 45.
Go ahead.
Got the suspect in custody.
We're on our way in.
I know who killed James Barlow.
Have a seat. Someone will be
with you to take your statement.
I don't want
to make a statement.
I solved the case.
What is this guy doing?
Like, is he serious?
Oh, come on! Jesus!
Are you kidding me?
-You got this?
-Yeah, I got this.
I got an officer down.
Hey, what's going on?
Driving a white sedan
with Nebraska plates.
14-11, 14-11.
Road needs to be closed
at 264...
Oh, hell, yeah.
There's some goddamn
detective work right there.
Junior!
Junior! Where is he, Kayla?
He's gone.
-Gone? Gone where?
-"Gone" Gone.
He left me.
-What?
-Didn't you hear?
He and Stacy-Lynn,
they're in love.
They're running away together.
Running? Running where?
I mean, what about Olive?
What about you guys?
What about--
What about the store?
Store's done.
What are you talking about?
Jesus, Ray, how stupid are you?
Junior's been stealing
from the store for years.
How do you think he can afford
this house, huh?
How do you think he bought
a goddamn boat?
Skip?
Do you have the money?
Where's Skip?
He's here.
Do you have the money?
I can get it.
All right.
That's right.
How's that? Yeah!
Whoo!
You like that?
Yeah!
There's more
where that came from.
- Whoo!
- Yeah, there is.
Whoo!
- Jesus!
- Ah!
-Ray?
-Ray? How'd you--
Hey, take a deep breath, okay?
You sure you know
how to use that thing?
Ray!
Ray, please, no.
I want a divorce.
Can I ask you something?
Okay.
Why'd you marry me?
I don't know.
I think I just stopped
believing in myself.
Yeah, stop the car.
Is that it?
Yep.
Bring it over.
Let him go first.
Go on.
You okay?
Yeah, I'm great.
Sorry.
Whatever.
Bring it over.
No.
Give it to me.
What are you doing?
Give it to him.
No.
He's not leaving here
with this money.
You are.
-Ah!
-Ray!
Ray, come on, come on, come on.
Climb out.
You go.
No. We got to get you
to a hospital.
I'll be fine.
I'm not going without you.
You're bleeding out.
I'm sorry I said
we weren't friends.
I don't care about that.
You're a great detective.
Give the money to the police.
Tell them everything.
Ray.
I'll be okay.
I'm okay.
He's still breathing.
Where's the cowboy?
Gone.
Does he have the money?
If I let you go,
will you leave town?
Why?
Because it's important to finish
things once we start them.
It's all right.