Lovesick (2011) Movie Script
Love Sick
There are 6.8 billion people in the world
Of which roughly 2.7 billion are
young adults between the ages of 18 to 38
Subtract the 1.5 billion that are women
Take away the psychos,
anti-social, homosexuals, etc
And you've still got about
Out of your lifetime,
you'll probably meet about 7,500 of them
Of which you'll date
about 1% of those men
Of which you'll only
stay with about 3% of that 1%
In hopes that one day
you'll end up with just one
And during my freshman year
at Beijing University
I found... my one
Yes, that's him!
My knight in shining armor
Do you know?
When you find a fallen eyelash,
you can make a wish
Here
What would you like to wish for?
It already came true
And why did he pick me?
Because you are my girl
He said this song was written just for me
He was also the first guy
that ever held my hand
The first guy that I ever kissed
And the first...
CUT!
This is PG-13! Hello!
Besides, I'm not that kind of girl
He was the perfect man
As perfect as a man could be
We were going to build our future together
And then something happened...
He became a pop star!
How can I let you go
When my heart is like a hurricane
Tangled deep inside me
I wrote that song
For my sweet, lovely
Tina Liang
She was the first girl
whoever believed in me
Happy Graduation!
Thank you!
Aaron, your new...
Tina!
Let me explain
Aaron
She's just a girl
Let her go back to Taiwan
Encore! Aaron! Encore! Aaron!
They say that
You're only meant for one person
But what happens when you lose "the one"
Or
Worse
"The one" never loved
you in the first place
It's devastating, like nothing matters
You don't even feel pain
You're just
Numb
Everyone tries to find ways
To keep you busy
Why don't you volunteer
at Grandpa's hospital?
Or
Maybe, go help your aunties
Angry
Divorced
Women
ADW is a support group for women
who were burned by men
That's my aunt Glenda
After her third divorce
She started this group
To help the countless
divorced women out there
And he even bought
a Tiffany bracelet for that tramp
Tina
Please pass out Mr. Bastard to everyone
All right
Men are only known to do what? Lulu
Screw you!
Good
Women who've been injured and hurt,
must find ways to protect themselves
from these bastards
You have 60 seconds
Go!
These aunties were my
only grace and strength
When I had nothing left
The Lord truly understands you
Because He doesn't betray anyone's heart
And then
One day
I snapped out of it
And I swore to myself that
I would never allow anyone
To hurt me like that again!
The more gorgeous they are,
the more they are what?
An asshole!
An asshole!
Good
Now keep up with me
Rule #1
Always be on your guard
Never be vulnerable or caught off guard
By men
Assholes comes in all shapes and sizes
Hi
Let me rock your world!
Can I
Upgrade your hard drive?
My name is Casanova
Rule #2: Be your own hero!
Learn to be strong and stand up for yourself!
The Fighting Princess Chapter 89:
The Howling Trees
You're surrounded, Princess
Give it up. Give up the panties!
Let's face it
The reality is relationships are
hard work and difficult
So women need to learn
to protect themselves
Because Rule #3 tells us that
"True love" only exists in fairy tales
(5 Years Later)
From the moment I saw you
My heart
Fluttered like a butterfly
From the moment I saw you
My heart stopped
And for a moment, I thought I had died
Is this guy for real?
Honey, what are you doing?
Playing around like this?
What's bothering you?
Why do we have to come
to these boring things?
Honey, when you're working
in the real world
You're going to wish you could've attended
more of these "boring things" in your youth
Really
Here's to fading youth
Let's mourn
Cheers
Drink up
Goodbye youth
Why aren't you drinking?
Do I need to start grieving this early?
Just be supportive
We've been there for you, haven't we?
Cheers
To youth
That's my father
Next to him is my grandpa
The only two good men left in this world
Girls, let's freshen up
Yes
I have to brush my teeth
Why hello
I'm the best man, David...
...Dong
And you are...
Me?
I'm here
just to eat and drink
Look at those bleached teeth
And those manicured, midget hands
I bet he's going to ask for my number
Or out to dinner
Or
If I have a boyfriend
So I was wondering,
if you're not seeing anybody
How about we get each other's number
Go out for some dinner
Sweat a little
Have some fun
What do you think?
Greedy bastard
Well, I think
You should know that
I'm not your pussy cat!
I'll pick you up later
She said yes, she said yes
Happy Heart Day
Here's a heart for you
And some heart candies too
This is my best friend
since childhood, CoCo
She's beautiful with a smoking hot body
But I don't know if she's innocent
or simple-minded
Naive or dim-witted
And men
won't even care about her inner beauty
So I've got to protect her
Did you just say "Happy Heart Day"?
Yup!
It's something I created
I wanted to find a way
To express love
to the entire world
Let me use your computer for a sec
Of course
This Heart Day you created
It's really just a sales gimmick, right?
What gimmick?
That sounds so un-romantic
Love is big money
It's the easiest way to
make money off people
Love
It's the most romantic thing in the world
Love...
It's also the biggest scam
That's crazy expensive!
Who's gonna buy this?
I'll take it
Actually, I wanted to buy them for you
Please... call me when you have time
Please call me when you have time
I almost forgot
Your grandpa brought this
over earlier for you
Said it's some kind of
new hospital program?
And there will also be
two newcomers joining us today
A brilliant young doctor
from Peking Union Medical Hospital:
Brandon Lu
And my granddaughter:
Tina Liang
Tina!
Nurse Dorothy!
Remember, your job is
to make sure they laugh
At least 20 minutes everyday
Not just a smile
But those big, deep laughs
This is really important
even though it's not in the report
Report?
Don't worry, Miki's here to help
My god
Why did I agree to help grandpa
with this laughter program?
Okay, make them laugh
Just make them laugh
Hello everybody!
It's my liver that's bad
Not my ears
Where's Dr. Li?
Who?
We want DR. LI, DR. LI, DR. LI!
Freakin' old people
Miki do something!
Okay!
Wait! You can't just leave me like that
Don't leave me here alone
You should hurry up and follow her
Those puppets
are you going to put on a show for us?
Are you going to put on a show for us?
Can you do that song
Can you do that song
from Frankie Valli that goes...
So he likes that song
Of course not
But
If you behave
If you behave
I just might think about it
I just might think about it
Now, anyone want to help?
I do!
Me! Me!
All right
Let's do some laughing!
Keep going okay guys?
God, what's with all these
weird people in the hospital?
God, what's with all these
weird people in the hospital?
Ta da! I've got some really good candy
She's freaking scary
My candy!
My candy, my candy!
Are you okay?
"Hi, I'm Tina!"
"LET'S MAKE OUT RIGHT NOW!"
"I have to go!"
I have to go!
So recently
I've been thinking
Botox
Botox?
What's the point of women spending so much
to turn themselves from 50 to 45?
To a man, is there really a difference
between a 50 and a 45 year old?
Isn't there a difference?
Can't I
just make myself
look pretty?
It's Tina
Hello
What? Calm down - what happened?
A man pushed you?
A man!
And the guy made you look into his eyes?
NO!
I almost slipped
and he caught me
and I accidently looked into his eyes and
Oh my God
Tina
Relax
Breath in
Breath out
Remember all our training from ADW
My body feels hot, my palms are sweating,
and I can't calm down!
I bet the guy's an asshole
I mean gorgeous, isn't he?
He's pretty hot
Oh crap!
Tina, remember
you've already broken Rule #1
Did he apologize?
He didn't run into me
I accidently ran into him
Tina!
She's already defending him!
This is bad
Tina! Get a hold of yourself
Don't you remember
everything that we taught you?
Men are all what?
Assholes!
And they only want to do what?
Screw you!
Yes, so
Don't you dare go soft
Seduce him!
Right!
Seduce him
Yes, seduce the guy
It's the easiest way
To take control and expose the pig
Oh my god - he's coming
Everyone act completely normal
Tina
What kind of game are you playing
with the wall there?
This is our new doctor
in the neurosurgery department,
Dr. Brandon Lu
He also just joined us here
I still have a patient to attend to
Can you please show him to radiology?
Hi, my name is Tina
Are you okay?
You know - you almost fell back there
(Seduce Him!)
Oh, it was nothing
Not like I've fallen for anybody before
Fallen in front of... fallen in front of!
You're used to falling?
Hell no!
I mean, just, occasionally
Uh... Where're you from?
I was born in Taiwan
Moved to Beijing when I was 5.
Did my studies at Peking
Union Medical College
But you're like young
I skipped some grades
Overloaded the rest into my semesters
So I graduated early
I'm sure he got it through connections
Connect what?
Nothing, nothing
I was just saying
Wow, you're exceptional
I'm here for the new
Experimental Neurosurgical Program
How about you?
I'm doing Humor Therapy
Actually, I think it's called
Laughter Therapy
You're funny
Seriously, which department are you in?
(Major Asshole)
Uh... What I mean is
Laughter Therapy
that sounds really interesting
I just didn't know we have this therapy
I'm not a doctor
I'm just a volunteer here
Oh, you're actually not a doctor
That's right
I'm not a doctor
But I do know that
Laughter can increase
the flow of nutrients in the blood
which triggers a boost in the immune system
that can combat nasty diseases
And Laughter
can help maintain a positive attitude
Which I know how important
that is to their doctors
Take that loser!
But you already know this, right DOCTOR?
Uh... If I have any
questions on Laugh Therapy
May I ask for your help?
Sure
Thank you
We're here
He's a doctor
A neurosurgeon
But I'm sure he's just a
Self-righteous bastard
Single?
He wasn't wearing a ring
Didn't know you already checked him out
No, I just noticed by accident
What kind of shoes, what kind of watch?
Citizen watch
Calvin Klein shoes
You see
It's these type of men women go stupid over
Including you
He just holds you for a moment
And you have a panic attack
Good Lord
It's like everything we
taught you was a waste
Well look
At least the guy's rich
and comes with medical insurance
Besides he's a doctor
so there's got to be benefits
I now want Lipo, forget the Facelift
Tell me straight up
Are you into him?
Of course not!
I don't fall that easily
Well good
Then the next time you see him,
you better teach him a lesson
No problem
Here here! Girls
Let's drink to
Tina's promise
You go girl!
Oh my God! You're so good!
You could be a pop star!
And when that soft light glows
and those baby birds chirp
and that clock chimes
That's when I'll let him have it!
The wine don't lie. I knew it, this is bad
We need to figure out a
way watch out for her
Oh My God
Control yourself!
Enlarge, bigger!
No - stop looking!
STOP LOOKING!
He's just too hot!
I wish he'd look over at me
Oh God! He just looked at me!
No - he was looking at me!
So adorable...
He's cute even when he's clumsy
Seriously, aren't you guys're
over doing it just a bit?
I'm gonna go do some real work
Jeez, what's her problem?
Isn't it obvious?
Totally
And where are you going?
Has everyone taken crazy pills?
He's not a freakin' celebrity!
Go away!
I don't want to laugh
I'm going to die anyway
Get help!
Now, Tom, don't be mad
We...
We're all here just trying to help
I'm sorry, it's all my fault
No, Miki, you did great
Don't worry about it
C'mon Tina think think think!
How did that song that he likes go?
You're just too good to be true
Can't take my eyes off you
You'd be like heaven to touch
I wanna hold you so much
At long last love has arrived
And I thank God I'm alive
You're just too good to be true
Can't take my eyes off you
I love you baby
And if it's quite all right
I need you baby to warm the lonely night
I love you baby
Trust in me when I say
Oh pretty baby don't bring me down I pray
Oh pretty baby now that I found you stay
And let me love you baby
Let me love you
Oh God! It's HIM!
All right, party's over.
Let's get back to work!
Dr. Lu
I didn't know you could dance so well
It's been a while, but your granddaughter
Quite a handful, isn't she?
I could barely keep up
Where's Tina?
Nurse Dorothy, where did Tina just go?
What time is it?
She probably ran off to the flower shop
Tina?
Everything's fine, it was just a dance
It's no big deal, everybody was doing it
Besides, I was just doing my job,
I'm sure he knew that
Tina?
Focus, Tina, Focus!
Right now you need to cut the stems!
Cut the stems! CUT THE STEMS!
Why can't I do anything right, right now?
Thorns!
CoCo, have I gone crazy?
I can't even cut flowers right
Don't move
Got it!
CoCo, do you know
You really should be more careful
on how you do things
What do you mean?
You just got to protect yourself
That's all I'm saying, all right?
What're we doing down here?
That guy... he's stalking me!
He's pretty cute!
Let him stalk you
CoCo! Remember the rules, the rules!
Okay, okay
So... what do we do now?
Go out there
But don't tell him I'm here
Why aren't you here?
Tell him I'm sick!
You're sick?
Tell him I died!
You died!
I've never seen you this nervous before
Do you like him?
Are you crazy! He...
He's a loser, punk
a gorgeous asshole!
And you!
You're so sexy... go out and seduce him
and he'll be drooling all over you
like a pervert!
Go! Seduce him!
But how do I do that?
Like this!
Oh God, look at those boobs!
Now go get him you sexy kitty!
Meow?
Excuse me?
That tickles
Hi! Stop, don't move!
I'm...
I said, don't move!
Not moving, not moving
I was just wondering...
Of course!
You just need to tell me
What you like and how you like it
And I'll do my best
To make you satisfied
Miss, I'm sorry
But your shirt
Sorry, I spilt some coffee on it
Is this guy homo?
Is this guy homo?
Is Tina here?
Is Tina here?
She's dead
She's dead?!
I said sick, not dead!
Oh, what I mean is
She's sick! Not dead
That's kind of a big difference
in the medical world
Tell him I have a disease!
She has a disease
A disease
What do you mean?
Like she's dying?
Can you tell me what kind of disease?
I think she got it
when she was traveling in India
Ginacuritus!
Ginacuritus?
Never heard of it?
I think monkeys sometimes get it
Well, if you see her,
can you please let her
know Brandon dropped by?
I will
Thank you
That was stressful
What's going on?
That guy
He's trying to make my life miserable
But, he doesn't seem like a bad person
You got it wrong!
And I'm not going to let ANY girl
fall into that man trap
I've got no choice
But to get rid of him
Time for some planning
The easiest way to destroy
a man
Is to make his life stink
And I don't mean just his reputation
I mean literally
make him stink
It doesn't matter
if he's dashing on the outside
Show people he's a slob on the inside
And it's bye bye pretty eyes
Dr. Lu
It's been a 36 hour shift for you
Don't you want to rest a bit?
I do
but
still got a presentation to do
Bye bye
Sorry to keep everyone waiting
Sorry, my shaver wasn't
working this morning
All right, so patient 301
needs to have his blood
checked every half hour
Dr. Lu
You showered, right?
Oh god, sorry, I think it's me
I'm really sorry
That's so yuck
Uh... I think I forgot my deodorant too
I'm sorry
I think it's coming from your shoes
No, it's definitely your pants
Hurry, we're on a tight schedule
And still have lots to do!
So the surgical program's success rates
have been very high
And this is extremely positive news
So in conclusion
I hope we can all keep building
on our good work
And become one of the most
successful neurosurgical hospitals
He's so MAN!
My Prince Charming!
He's too amazing
Thank you
And then he trashes all his clothes
Did he have a tight body?
Shut up
What the heck am I gonna do?
We're dealing with a serious guy here
He's not only survived
what you've thrown at him
But
Somehow come out even more popular from it
Right! So now
Looks like we've got no choice
Time to get serious here
You've got to go on a date with him
Go on a date with him?
Go on a date with him?
Discover what this guy's REALLY hiding
Discover what this guy's REALLY hiding
I just want him to go away
Well then quit whining
Well then quit whining
and take your game up a notch!
And take your game up a notch!
Girls
YES
Why the heck did he have to
come to this hospital?
Pizza... I smell Pizza!
Oh, I'm mixed ethnicity
Mixed? What're you a mix of?
I'm part Shandong, part Shanghainese
Miki, you're the best!
Miki Lin, Miki Lin,
please come to the Nursing Station!
No, no
I'll clean up... you go
Thanks
You sure do like falling...
And you're a hard person to track down
Well, I'm busy
Super busy
Crazy busy
I heard from your friend that
You're sick?
What're you talking about?
Oh right! I'm sick
Why'd she go tell you that
I'm sorry, I'm sorry!
But what exactly is Ginacuritus?
It's a disease that monkeys sometimes get
Don't you know that, Doctor?
I knew it!
But you're not a monkey...
All right! Then I got to go!
Wait!
...Sorry
But I just thought maybe
If you want,
we could go talk about Ginacurtitus
Over dinner
Oh thanks, but
I just ate. A lot
Gross isn't it?
Wait, how about this
If I can get you to laugh
Will you have dinner with me?
Are you kidding me dude?
Okay, here we go
There was this girl
she wanted to marry a man
that had two things:
One, he needed to be a
knight in shining armor
And two, he needed to have a chariot
So, she went to her computer
to search for a match
And it told her the answer was
Chinese chess!
You know - Chinese chess!
Because there's a knight and also a chariot
Chinese chess! Chinese...
What a retard...
I'll think about it, okay?
Hello, this is CoCo!
CoCo
What's up?
I have a date but don't
know what to wear...
Hello?
Been waiting long?
After you
How'd you hear of this place?
Oh, from your grandpa, he told me...
My grandpa?
Yes, your grandpa...
I'm sorry, sorry
It's ok, I need to go clean up really quick
What's wrong with me?
What am I gonna do?
Grandpa knows I'm on a date with Brandon
Calm down
Relax
I'm trying to relax too
Your grandpa's not the type
to tell everyone, okay?
Now what's our goal?
Take down Brandon
And get the real dirt on this dude
Very Good
Not you!
Now go have some fun
And destroy him
Okay? Don't call if it's not important
Excuse me, miss
May I need your help
You see my friend over there
He's having a hard time
getting over his last breakup
and feeling kind of down
So I was thinking
Maybe you might have the ability to
give him some extra attention?
You know, I've noticed there're
quite a lot of pretty girls here
Checking you out
Really?
Now, here's where
our hot, sexy dancers
are gonna bring out some of
you lucky people to dance!
C'mon honey, the show's about to start!
But wait!
It's show time
Song's not over yet
Pretty impressive.
I didn't know you could dance to Latin
Well I did live in Spain for a while
But that was a long time ago
Oh... for a girl?
Actually, I did residency
at a hospital in Barcelona...
Hola
You were pretty good back there
You were pretty amazing too
If you like, we could go dance in private
And what I serve is much better
than what they serve here
Ciao
Bye
Oh right, where was I?
I learned a lot in Barcelona
on surgical techniques
How did that have no effect?
And from such a sexy woman!
Is he really homo?
How about you?
How long have you been at the hospital?
Since Aar...
...A long time ago
Anyways, everyone's really good to me
whenever I volunteer
So, it makes me really happy
They are great people
And they really take care of me too
But every now
and then it still feels kinda lonely
You get lonely?
Doesn't everybody?
Thanks
Let's split it
Did you hear?
Tina went out with Dr. Lu?
I heard that she threw water in his face
No, I heard she sucker punched him
Or maybe she did both!
What're you guys doing?
Is it true?
Did you and Dr. Lu really
go out last night?
It was just dinner
Just dinner, no big deal
Where did you guys go?
Just some place called the Latin House
Well, did you guys...
Dance?
It's not like I had a choice
Brandon pulled me onto the floor
But that's not the big secret I discovered
See, the big secret is...
He already has a woman
No way!
Just check out the picture in his wallet
A doctor who's young and successful
Of course he's got a woman
But that doesn't mean
He's a good man
who doesn't cheat on her
The pig's lucky
I didn't sucker punch him in the face
Checkmate Brandon Lu
All of you shut up!
Making up all this crap
because of the way a person looks
It's all a load of BS
And you!
You got a mouth as black as your heart!
Don't you dare say his name?
Who was that?
That's Denise
Excuse me, do I know you?
Go away
You judgmental prick
Easy with the cursing okay?
What'd I ever do to you?
Stop acting like a dumbass
You know exactly what you did
Miss, you really need to learn some manners
Yeah
But at least I don't talk crap
behind people's back
Is Brandon your doctor?
Are you really retarded?
You're - you're the girl in that picture
Brandon's my brother
You don't know the first thing about him
What he's gone through
How could I have...?
I may be handicapped,
but at least my heart isn't rotten
Unlike you
You've got nothing but poison on the inside
Completely worthless
Why the long face?
Carlton, am I a horrible person?
No, don't be silly
Why would you say that?
What if I was lying to everyone
about Brandon today?
What if I was lying to everyone
about Brandon today?
Then that probably wasn't too bright
But good men don't exist anymore
And I thought he was just like the rest
You can't believe a word they say
All their sweet whispers and promises
Just turn into a knife
that cut your heart dry
Here, take a look at this
Maybe you'll see not all guys are animals
Love: You don't have to understand it,
describe it, or define it
This. Is. Crap.
You just know when love appears
Because when you wake up
the world feels a little less scary
Tina?
Why're you stalking me?
Um... may I join you?
What a coincidence
So, I met Denise today
She curses you out?
How'd you know?
She's my sister, I know her really well
I'm sorry about that,
she's really not a bad person
The pain's just made it tough for her,
and a little erratic
Never mind, let's talk about something else
I'm starving, what's good here?
Actually... Brandon's kinda cool
And his life's a lot more interesting
than I realized
Not only does he spend his free time
speaking and presenting
He also travels to third world nations
on medical missions work
He works out, like cooking,
and at times, stays in step with dancing
But spends most of his free time
taking care of Denise
Oh yeah
He also sponsors two kids in Africa
Then he said all this medical jargon
that I couldn't understand
But one thing's for sure
It's all so he can one day be invited
to speak at medical G2
conference in Beijing
And, if this hospital gets invited to G2
And, if this hospital gets invited to G2 My
research could save thousands of more lives
My research could save
thousands of more lives
But I've got to do a great job first
Because if I mess up, it could be years
before I get another opportunity like this
What?
How about you?
How did you get into Psychoneuroimmunology?
You mean Laughter Therapy?
I thought it was kinda silly, at first
But you know what?
I really do enjoy helping out my patients
I'm sure laughter has its merits
But you don't believe laughter's can heal,
right?
Tina, if laughter was all we needed
A lot more people in the world
wouldn't be in pain
All we've got is medicine, and science
But you can't deny how much
Laughter encourages people
Laughter encourages people
gives them hope
gives them hope
But they're all just temporary
Yeah, yeah, yeah. You're the smartest
I don't wanna argue with you
Stubborn pig!
Sorry, sorry!
I really didn't mean to do that
I tell you what
How about when we're at the hospital
When you're working,
I'll go check out what you do?
And when I'm working
you can come check out what I do?
Fine
And why not
make it a competition then
A competition?
Loser has to buy the
winner an expensive gift
Okay, let's do it then
(AUNT GLENDA)
(AUNT BING)
(AUNT LULU)
Genius!
Quite impressive, doctor
Your sock puppet wasn't too bad either
Want to grab something to eat?
I'm starving
I know this place with
really great Peking duck
Dr. Lu, we have an emergency in room 219
You should hurry
I'll just go pickup the food for us
Okay, thanks!
(Peking Duck)
Here, here I got you
Didn't anyone tell you to knock first?
I got it
Sorry!
You're slipping
I said I got it! Would you let go?
Jeez, let go!
Stop it you STINKING GUAVA!
You're a STINKING DURIAN!
Well, please let this Durian help, okay
All right!
I sincerely apologize to you
Your brother... is a really great ma...
Nice person
I was wrong
Do you like him or something?
No way
Why not?
Everyone does
I feel so hungry all of a sudden
If there was only some Peking duck
But I got this for Brandon
I knew you liked him!
Faker
Oh, relax
My brother's already married - to his work
I won't tell him nothing
Oh, don't worry about this
He'd do anything for me
Sometimes I get really pissed about that
Pissed?
Because he thinks this is all his fault
But it's really not...
Whatever
I never liked heels anyway
Denise
Can you tell me what happened?
Denise was actually brilliantly talented
Admired at school,
with a bright future ahead of her
Don't you know
that's a limited edition basketball?
Go get it already
Hurry up!
Denise was rushed to the hospital
For emergency surgery
But she suffered major blood loss
and damage to her spinal cord
In the end, the doctors
couldn't do anything
Brandon blamed himself for it all
And swore he'd help Denise walk again
So he spent all his time
and energy to be a doctor
So he spent all his time
and energy to be a doctor
Brandon says this is
the only G2 union hospital that
may be granted a surgical program
to cure my legs
So all these years of hard work
It was for you
To go to Beijing? To go to G2?
Well duh!
It sucks always living
in a stupid ass hospital
And you
You're actually all right
But you sure do say the ugliest things
So what you're saying is
We're actually quite alike
I'm tired
Don't forget your blanket
and catch a cold now
You really should stop
sleeping on the job now
Looks like you really are tired...
What's wrong with me?
And you...
Did I fall asleep...?
You know
When you're not all feisty,
you're really pretty
Why're you looking at me like that?
Never seen anyone drool before?
What are you thinking?
And what're you doing?
Should I run... or maybe I should just...
Wait! Why should I let you...
But... I don't...
it's been so long since...
So long...
DAMN!
Tina! Why haven't you been picking up?
You've got some explaining to do!
YES!
See! Not every girl falls for your tricks!
YES!
I told you seducing him would work!
Yes! Yes!
Please, let this be a dream!
Please! This can't be real,
I have to be dreaming!
Tina! Where are you going?
Come back! Come...
Will this make you feel better?
Sometimes I think
I'm a pretty horrible person
Nonsense
You're one of the sweetest girls I know
Sweet?
Would someone sweet punch a guy like that
His nose was even bleeding
You were just scared
because he got close to you
Have a bite
You've never tried this one before
Why would he scare me?
Because you care that
he'll see into your heart
So you punched Mr. Perfect
If he's Mr. Perfect, he'll forgive you
Please, there's no such
thing as Mr. Perfect
If something like this happened to me
I wouldn't even forgive myself
It's not like Mr. Perfect isn't human
He'll still get upset
And feel sadness
But if he can cherish you,
the real you, all of you
Then he's your Mr. Perfect
But what if I'm not his Mrs. Perfect?
That's okay
You can still apologize and be good friends
Dr. Lu, I just want to apologize for...
Sorry, I must have the wrong office
No, no, you're right
This is his office,
he's just not in yet
Oh! That's okay, I'll
come back later then...
I'm so sorry! I'm so sorry!
You all right there?
Be more careful, or you'll make a mess
Are you...
Tina Liang?
How do you know me?
I've heard so much about you
Hi. I'm Lisa
Didn't think I'd run into you so soon
You've been running my
Laughter Therapy program, haven't you?
YOU'RE DR. LI?
But, you're
(Gorgeous)
(Perfect)
(A Bitch)
Supposed to be out of the country?
But I just returned
And
I've already heard about what you did
How you punched Brandon?
Don't worry
Brandon's a man, he won't
hold it against you
But
if you really want to make it up to him
my suggestion is you
leave him alone for now
he still has a sister to take care of
And really doesn't have time
to babysit little girls
Tina? There you are! I've been...
Brandon!
Lisa?
Aren't you supposed to be in...
Wait, does this mean?
Yes!
Really? How'd you do it!
Tina! Lisa and I...
Brandon, I found this great
research while in Beijing
I got to show you, come on!
Hurry!
Okay
I'm glad I punched him
Helps me remember
That I'm not even the right type for him
Tina
You don't have to change yourself
for other people
You are your own type
I hate my type
If you're always focused on yourself
You'll never find
the clarity to see other people
As perfect as he may be
He still doesn't know
what you're thinking inside
It's true there're lots
of bad guys out there
But there're still some good ones
that'll always take care
and protect the girl
they hold close to their heart
and protect the girl they hold close to their
heart Do you think Brandon's that type?
Do you think Brandon's that type?
Do you think Brandon's that type?
Beats me
Well, at first, I swore
He was just another gorgeous asshole
But in the end,
all I see is his heart and determination
It's good you can see that in him
Yeah, but I don't have
any of those things in me
I can't even compete with that Dr. Li
I wish I could just be like you CoCo?
So pretty with a hot body
You don't have to envy anyone
It's a miracle that you
actually met someone
that your heart both feels and hurts for
Do you know how many women
wish they could have that?
Because that's how you know
what you really feel deep down
And it makes your love story a real one
That's some deep stuff
I've never even asked you
How many boyfriend have you had?
Including last week?
To be exact, I believe it's...
Zero
Then how can you still believe in true love
when you've never even met your Mr. Perfect
Just because I haven't doesn't mean I won't
But with that face,
those boobs, and those legs
You always have guys lining up for you!
Thank you!
What I'm saying is you ain't right!
Tina
It doesn't matter when
we'll meet our true love
We just have to keep believing we will
Why can't this all just be easy?
Why does love have to be so complicated?
Because you're just lovesick
And everyone's waiting
For that someone who can help cure us of it
What's with the long face?
Something bad happen?
Nothing
I just... really successfully
Screwed everything up
Hey, as long as you can laugh about it
You're going to be all right
Thanks
I feel even worse now
All right
I want you to know
That you've really helped us here
Even our medicine
tastes better now
To be honest, we're grateful for you
C'mon
Give me a nice, big, happy smile
Tina
Your grandpa wants to see you in 10 minutes
Crap
What's the psycho witch doing here?
I'm sorry about earlier
I feel like we got off on the wrong foot
I heard you've been doing
such a great job with my program
I was actually a little... jealous
Jealous?
For real?
Thank you Tina
For being there for my patients
when I was away
It was the right thing to do
Did I really misunderstand her?
Can you forgive me?
It's no big deal Dr. Li
Please, call me Lisa
You know, she's actually kinda all right
Looks like you two have already met
Tina
I have absolutely wonderful news for you
In these last few months,
you've been doing such a great job
That you've been recommended to be
the next supervisor to take over
the laughter program
Are you for real?
Of course I'm for real
And this wouldn't have happened without
Dr. Li's recommendation on your behalf
Lisa... you?
Congratulations Tina
Will you take it?
I promise I won't let you guys down!
But what about you, Lisa?
Dr. Li will be leaving us, unfortunately
This week actually
Oh yeah!
Oh, that's horrible
Dr. Li will be leaving
to represent our hospital
at the G2 Medical Conference in Beijing
And she'll be going with Dr. Brandon Lu
The people at G2 are very interested
in Brandon's research
And if all goes well
Together, they'll be speaking in Beijing
and then all over the world
over the next 4 years
And pioneering the future of
Neurosurgery with Laughter Therapy
Oh that's... that's great news
I knew you'd be happy for us
In fact
we were going to throw a big party
to congratulate your promotion
And I guess
We can make it a farewell party
for Brandon and I also
I know
what Brandon needs is
a mature and capable woman
And once we're in Beijing
I'll make sure we have a good life together
But I want to thank you
For being such a good sister to him
Tina
Where've you been?
I've been looking for
you these last few days
I just, wanted to talk about
what happened that night
Right...
Sorry for punching you that night
What's going on?
Nothing
Nothing's going on
Stop acting like nothing's up
You're gonna leave anyways
what else is there to talk about
Just 4 years, right?
Actually, 5
You should go celebrate
It's something you've
been working so hard for
I know
It's just... I don't know why...
And Lisa... she's been so good to me
Yeah, unlike me
She understands you
She knows what's best for you
What are you talking about?
Congratulations
You won
Here
That was our deal
Loser buys winner a prize
I...
Did I do something wrong?
Why do you just feel so distant right now
Once you're in Beijing
It'll feel further
What the hell!
Definitely excited I'll be returning
to Taiwan to kick off the tour
Then it'll be China and
a lot of other stops
I'm looking forward to
showing everyone a brand new Aaron
Stop hiding
What is it?
It's a love letter from Jin He
And then, he slowly held my hand
And I was so surprised
My heart felt like
it was going burst out of my chest
Tina
You know all those rules you told me about
I don't want them
And I don't need them
What do you mean?
I just want to tell Jin
That I love him already!
NO!
He just held your hand
Aren't you afraid you're going to get hurt?
Rule #3
True love doesn't exist
No!
Your rules suck!
So you do, love him?
What if he doesn't love you back?
But if I don't tell him,
I'll regret it for sure
I'd rather try to love,
than be scared all my life
It's just giving yourself a chance
I hate never knowing and living in fear
And all those crazy rules of yours
To be honest
They're all just excuses
because you're afraid
So...
He means that much to you?
He means that much to me too...
That much to me...
Miki, what time is it?!
Are you ok?
No, not okay!
Where to?
The airport!
Can you please hurry!
Oh my god!
Sir, I'm so sorry
But I forgot my wallet
But I really need to tell someone
that I love him!
But I really need to tell someone that I love him!
I've seen folks like you before
I've seen folks like you before
Especially from the
Ximending (party) district
Get out if you can't pay!
I'm not like that at all!
I'm Tina Liang
I work at that hospital back there
Please! I promise I'll pay you back
I just need to make that 9 o'clock flight
Because this is the first time,
I want to believe in...
Love
Love!
All right
Hang on now!
Which airport are we going to?
Oh crap! I don't know
Wait! Wait!
Hello?
I'm in the middle of retrieving my youth,
I don't have time for your crap
Tina Liang
I hope you know what you're doing
Girls
Pull out your smart phones,
we've got work to do!
Okay!
Hey! You big STUPID GUAVA!
Open your eyes!
I hope you rot and rot and rot!
Hurry up and tell me which airline!
Oh damn
Mandarin Airlines and Eva Airlines
both have a 9 o'clock flights
Calm down
Is there any smart person around
that you can ask?
Freak, freak, watch the freakin' road
watch the freakin' road!
Freakin' road!
Um... Sir
do you think it's Mandarin Airlines
Or Eva Airlines?
Mandarin!
It has to be Mandarin Airlines!
I took their flight when I went to Beijing
for my Wushu competition
(Donnie Yen)
Their flight attendants are so pretty
It's Mandarin Airlines!
Donnie Yen says it's Mandarin Airlines!
D- D- Donnie Yen is in the car with you?!
Stop joking around!
I'm telling you
Mandarin Airlines is in the first terminal
Hurry up
Hello, I'd like to check...
I found it!
Mandarin Airlines 9: 05
direct flight to Beijing Boarding gate B7
You hear that
B7, GO!
I told you it's Mandarin Airlines!
All right - rocket fire!
My taxi is a god damn rocket!
We're here
Here? Thank you!
Go get him back!
Sorry! Sorry!
Miss!
Sorry ma'am but you can't cut in line
Please just hear me out
My name is Tina Liang
And you have a passenger
named Brandon Lu, who's...
I'm sorry ma'am
But I can't help you unless
you show your passport and ticket
Molly
Your name is Molly, right?
Molly, have you ever made a mistake
One that you truly regretted
Have you ever genuinely loved someone?
Have you ever genuinely loved someone?
But because you were scared of getting hurt
But because you were scared of getting hurt
You pushed him away
Pushed away your happiness
Have you ever said dumb
things you didn't mean
And only when you wanted to
finally tell him how you felt
He already left your world
Molly, please, I'm begging you to help me
I have to let him know how I feel
And we're SO close
Please, please help me
Miss!
Get out of here!
You're causing trouble for us all
And there're people still waiting
Take it
It's my ID card
Just take it!
Hurry! Go!
Stop! Stop right there!
But I have this! I have this!
STOP RIGHT THERE! STOP! STOP!
Brandon! Brandon!
Tina?
Tina!
Brandon!
Brandon!
Tina, what're you doing here?
I don't know
I mean I do know!
I- I gotta to tell you something
Something horrible
Something really bad
But I really have to tell you
I... I...
What's happened?
Brandon, I've screw up a lot of things
I...
I'm really pathetic
And I'm horrible!
I've acted like a monkey,
a crazy diseased monkey
What am I saying?
I'm trying to say that
Today, I spoke with a girl
She...
She was afraid
But she knew one thing
She didn't have much courage
But she knew this one thing was
really important to her
And that's why I'm here
And I don't have courage either
And I'm all out of time
But I really have to tell you that...
I don't know why you're
always so good to me!
Because I love you
I don't know why but
I get all nervous when I see you
I really don't understand why
I know you're kinda crazy
Sometimes mean
You hit hard like a man
I think there's something wrong with me
And I'm a doctor and I don't get it
But I do know one thing
And that is, I love you
Do you...
Can you can tell me
If you want me to stay
Then I'll stay
I do I do, please don't leave me
I don't want to pretend anymore
Please don't hurt me
I'm so tired
Tina!
What're you doing here?
Brandon
The whole flight's waiting because of you
Let them wait!
You don't have to tell me how you feel
I can understand
But if you tell me to stay
I'll stay
But, if he stays
What'll happen to all
those years of research?
And what about Denise?
I can't be this selfish
Because of you
I can finally walk away from my past
And feel love again
But, I can't do this to you
Because if I do
I'll just be like
all the other wretches out there
And I'll never forgive myself for it
Hey! What're you doing? Let her go!
Sorry sir, but this lady needs to leave,
and you need to board the plane now
Go
What?
Go. And don't ever look back
Is this what you really want?
Go! And don't come back
Say something
Say something!
Don't forget me...
Hi everyone
Honey
Everything's gonna be all right
I'm good
Oh, it's no big deal, really
I'm really glad he left
Just like that
You guys want to know
what he said to me?
He actually said if I told him to stay
Then he would stay
Such a liar
I did it
I finally...
I finally got rid of him
I'm so happy that he's gone
So happy...
Aaron?
Tina?
It's really you!
It's you...
It's been such a long time
The last time I saw you was...
How have you been?
All these years
I should actually ask YOU
How do think a girl that
got broken would feel?
Do you have any idea
how hard these years have been?
Rule #1
Always be on guard against men
Rule #2
Learn to be your own hero
Rule #3
True love doesn't exist
You taught me that
Until the day I met him
Who made me forget all those god damn rules
But all I could do was watch him leave
Are you happy now?
Now that I've got nothing
But I still want you to know
Even if I'll never see him again
I still want to say
I love Brandon Lu
I love him, I love him
I love him, I love him, I love him
I love Brandon Lu, can you hear me!
Did you hear what I said?
Me?
You!
It's all because of you!
Tina
I'm really sorry
Poke him in the eyes!
Doctor! Doctor!
How is she?
Trauma to the head, blood
pressure is normal
Brandon
Are you okay?
How about I get you something to drink?
That girl is a crazy lunatic!
I can't believe she punched Aaron
I heard Aaron even had to cancel his tour
All because of her
(Aaron attacked by crazy fan!)
Something wrong?
Nothing
Let's go
And not be late for...
I love Brandon Lu
I love him, I love him
Brandon!
I love Brandon Lu, I love Brandon Lu
Can you hear me! Can you hear me!
I love him, I love him, I love him
I love Brandon Lu! Can you hear me!
Can you hear me!
Brandon
This girl's really not worth it
It took you so much time just to get here
Are you really going to throw it all away?
There're still a lot of people
who need your help
Especially your sister Denise
Brandon
Congratulations Lisa
You just got promoted
I don't understand
Why are you such an idiot?
What is it that she has that I don't
My heart
Lisa
That girl has my heart
Brandon?
My sweet Princess!
You're finally awake
You had us all scared out of our minds
I'm sorry, Grandpa
I didn't mean to scare you
It's all right
I know you're a fighting princess
How do you feel now?
Like I just got the beat down
I'm kinda tired
And kinda sad
Because of Brandon?
But I guess it's all too late
It's not too late
Sleeping on the job are you?
Still asleep?
Not afraid I'll punch you again?
I'm sorry
You're here
I'm here
You hope you meet that person one day
Who loves you for you. The real you
And that if you were down
and out and lost it all
Somehow, you'll still have a place
In their heart
Maybe this type of love is asking too much
in modern relationships these days
But if you can just keep
believing in true love
Then maybe lovesick people like us
Can finally find our cure
Of course
You can choose not to believe in love
Then I can recommend you to join ADW
I'm hungry
My aunties will happily welcome you in
My aunties will happily welcome you in
They'll even give you a
membership discount!
Hello, are you still there? Hello?
That, yes yes yes
Ariel, you didn't...
Damn, that surprised me
I'm the best man, David. D - A...
I'm the best man, David... Tao
I'm Korean
Korean? When did you come to Taiwan?
Because I'm mixed
What're you a mix of?
Shandon and Shanghainese
Shandon and Shanghainese
That has nothing to do with Korea
With that beautiful face,
plastic doll breasts... sorry!
Because there's a knight and a chariot!
Here! We're here!
We're here
Where the hell are you looking!
Go get him back!
Wing Chun!
Snake!
Tiger!
Eagle!
You can do it!
I need to find... I found it...
Brandon! Brandon!
She was too fast!
Did you feel the electricity?
I'm so pretty! I'm a pretty man! Yeah!
Brandon Lu
Do you take this beautiful
lady as your wife?
I do
Tina Liang, Do you take this...
Don't ever ask me if I love you
Even if one day
I lose my memory and forget my own name
I promise I'll never forget you
Because you
made me believe
that anything's possible
Well, let's not wait any longer
I now pronounce you husband and wife
Brandon, you may...
There are 6.8 billion people in the world
Of which roughly 2.7 billion are
young adults between the ages of 18 to 38
Subtract the 1.5 billion that are women
Take away the psychos,
anti-social, homosexuals, etc
And you've still got about
Out of your lifetime,
you'll probably meet about 7,500 of them
Of which you'll date
about 1% of those men
Of which you'll only
stay with about 3% of that 1%
In hopes that one day
you'll end up with just one
And during my freshman year
at Beijing University
I found... my one
Yes, that's him!
My knight in shining armor
Do you know?
When you find a fallen eyelash,
you can make a wish
Here
What would you like to wish for?
It already came true
And why did he pick me?
Because you are my girl
He said this song was written just for me
He was also the first guy
that ever held my hand
The first guy that I ever kissed
And the first...
CUT!
This is PG-13! Hello!
Besides, I'm not that kind of girl
He was the perfect man
As perfect as a man could be
We were going to build our future together
And then something happened...
He became a pop star!
How can I let you go
When my heart is like a hurricane
Tangled deep inside me
I wrote that song
For my sweet, lovely
Tina Liang
She was the first girl
whoever believed in me
Happy Graduation!
Thank you!
Aaron, your new...
Tina!
Let me explain
Aaron
She's just a girl
Let her go back to Taiwan
Encore! Aaron! Encore! Aaron!
They say that
You're only meant for one person
But what happens when you lose "the one"
Or
Worse
"The one" never loved
you in the first place
It's devastating, like nothing matters
You don't even feel pain
You're just
Numb
Everyone tries to find ways
To keep you busy
Why don't you volunteer
at Grandpa's hospital?
Or
Maybe, go help your aunties
Angry
Divorced
Women
ADW is a support group for women
who were burned by men
That's my aunt Glenda
After her third divorce
She started this group
To help the countless
divorced women out there
And he even bought
a Tiffany bracelet for that tramp
Tina
Please pass out Mr. Bastard to everyone
All right
Men are only known to do what? Lulu
Screw you!
Good
Women who've been injured and hurt,
must find ways to protect themselves
from these bastards
You have 60 seconds
Go!
These aunties were my
only grace and strength
When I had nothing left
The Lord truly understands you
Because He doesn't betray anyone's heart
And then
One day
I snapped out of it
And I swore to myself that
I would never allow anyone
To hurt me like that again!
The more gorgeous they are,
the more they are what?
An asshole!
An asshole!
Good
Now keep up with me
Rule #1
Always be on your guard
Never be vulnerable or caught off guard
By men
Assholes comes in all shapes and sizes
Hi
Let me rock your world!
Can I
Upgrade your hard drive?
My name is Casanova
Rule #2: Be your own hero!
Learn to be strong and stand up for yourself!
The Fighting Princess Chapter 89:
The Howling Trees
You're surrounded, Princess
Give it up. Give up the panties!
Let's face it
The reality is relationships are
hard work and difficult
So women need to learn
to protect themselves
Because Rule #3 tells us that
"True love" only exists in fairy tales
(5 Years Later)
From the moment I saw you
My heart
Fluttered like a butterfly
From the moment I saw you
My heart stopped
And for a moment, I thought I had died
Is this guy for real?
Honey, what are you doing?
Playing around like this?
What's bothering you?
Why do we have to come
to these boring things?
Honey, when you're working
in the real world
You're going to wish you could've attended
more of these "boring things" in your youth
Really
Here's to fading youth
Let's mourn
Cheers
Drink up
Goodbye youth
Why aren't you drinking?
Do I need to start grieving this early?
Just be supportive
We've been there for you, haven't we?
Cheers
To youth
That's my father
Next to him is my grandpa
The only two good men left in this world
Girls, let's freshen up
Yes
I have to brush my teeth
Why hello
I'm the best man, David...
...Dong
And you are...
Me?
I'm here
just to eat and drink
Look at those bleached teeth
And those manicured, midget hands
I bet he's going to ask for my number
Or out to dinner
Or
If I have a boyfriend
So I was wondering,
if you're not seeing anybody
How about we get each other's number
Go out for some dinner
Sweat a little
Have some fun
What do you think?
Greedy bastard
Well, I think
You should know that
I'm not your pussy cat!
I'll pick you up later
She said yes, she said yes
Happy Heart Day
Here's a heart for you
And some heart candies too
This is my best friend
since childhood, CoCo
She's beautiful with a smoking hot body
But I don't know if she's innocent
or simple-minded
Naive or dim-witted
And men
won't even care about her inner beauty
So I've got to protect her
Did you just say "Happy Heart Day"?
Yup!
It's something I created
I wanted to find a way
To express love
to the entire world
Let me use your computer for a sec
Of course
This Heart Day you created
It's really just a sales gimmick, right?
What gimmick?
That sounds so un-romantic
Love is big money
It's the easiest way to
make money off people
Love
It's the most romantic thing in the world
Love...
It's also the biggest scam
That's crazy expensive!
Who's gonna buy this?
I'll take it
Actually, I wanted to buy them for you
Please... call me when you have time
Please call me when you have time
I almost forgot
Your grandpa brought this
over earlier for you
Said it's some kind of
new hospital program?
And there will also be
two newcomers joining us today
A brilliant young doctor
from Peking Union Medical Hospital:
Brandon Lu
And my granddaughter:
Tina Liang
Tina!
Nurse Dorothy!
Remember, your job is
to make sure they laugh
At least 20 minutes everyday
Not just a smile
But those big, deep laughs
This is really important
even though it's not in the report
Report?
Don't worry, Miki's here to help
My god
Why did I agree to help grandpa
with this laughter program?
Okay, make them laugh
Just make them laugh
Hello everybody!
It's my liver that's bad
Not my ears
Where's Dr. Li?
Who?
We want DR. LI, DR. LI, DR. LI!
Freakin' old people
Miki do something!
Okay!
Wait! You can't just leave me like that
Don't leave me here alone
You should hurry up and follow her
Those puppets
are you going to put on a show for us?
Are you going to put on a show for us?
Can you do that song
Can you do that song
from Frankie Valli that goes...
So he likes that song
Of course not
But
If you behave
If you behave
I just might think about it
I just might think about it
Now, anyone want to help?
I do!
Me! Me!
All right
Let's do some laughing!
Keep going okay guys?
God, what's with all these
weird people in the hospital?
God, what's with all these
weird people in the hospital?
Ta da! I've got some really good candy
She's freaking scary
My candy!
My candy, my candy!
Are you okay?
"Hi, I'm Tina!"
"LET'S MAKE OUT RIGHT NOW!"
"I have to go!"
I have to go!
So recently
I've been thinking
Botox
Botox?
What's the point of women spending so much
to turn themselves from 50 to 45?
To a man, is there really a difference
between a 50 and a 45 year old?
Isn't there a difference?
Can't I
just make myself
look pretty?
It's Tina
Hello
What? Calm down - what happened?
A man pushed you?
A man!
And the guy made you look into his eyes?
NO!
I almost slipped
and he caught me
and I accidently looked into his eyes and
Oh my God
Tina
Relax
Breath in
Breath out
Remember all our training from ADW
My body feels hot, my palms are sweating,
and I can't calm down!
I bet the guy's an asshole
I mean gorgeous, isn't he?
He's pretty hot
Oh crap!
Tina, remember
you've already broken Rule #1
Did he apologize?
He didn't run into me
I accidently ran into him
Tina!
She's already defending him!
This is bad
Tina! Get a hold of yourself
Don't you remember
everything that we taught you?
Men are all what?
Assholes!
And they only want to do what?
Screw you!
Yes, so
Don't you dare go soft
Seduce him!
Right!
Seduce him
Yes, seduce the guy
It's the easiest way
To take control and expose the pig
Oh my god - he's coming
Everyone act completely normal
Tina
What kind of game are you playing
with the wall there?
This is our new doctor
in the neurosurgery department,
Dr. Brandon Lu
He also just joined us here
I still have a patient to attend to
Can you please show him to radiology?
Hi, my name is Tina
Are you okay?
You know - you almost fell back there
(Seduce Him!)
Oh, it was nothing
Not like I've fallen for anybody before
Fallen in front of... fallen in front of!
You're used to falling?
Hell no!
I mean, just, occasionally
Uh... Where're you from?
I was born in Taiwan
Moved to Beijing when I was 5.
Did my studies at Peking
Union Medical College
But you're like young
I skipped some grades
Overloaded the rest into my semesters
So I graduated early
I'm sure he got it through connections
Connect what?
Nothing, nothing
I was just saying
Wow, you're exceptional
I'm here for the new
Experimental Neurosurgical Program
How about you?
I'm doing Humor Therapy
Actually, I think it's called
Laughter Therapy
You're funny
Seriously, which department are you in?
(Major Asshole)
Uh... What I mean is
Laughter Therapy
that sounds really interesting
I just didn't know we have this therapy
I'm not a doctor
I'm just a volunteer here
Oh, you're actually not a doctor
That's right
I'm not a doctor
But I do know that
Laughter can increase
the flow of nutrients in the blood
which triggers a boost in the immune system
that can combat nasty diseases
And Laughter
can help maintain a positive attitude
Which I know how important
that is to their doctors
Take that loser!
But you already know this, right DOCTOR?
Uh... If I have any
questions on Laugh Therapy
May I ask for your help?
Sure
Thank you
We're here
He's a doctor
A neurosurgeon
But I'm sure he's just a
Self-righteous bastard
Single?
He wasn't wearing a ring
Didn't know you already checked him out
No, I just noticed by accident
What kind of shoes, what kind of watch?
Citizen watch
Calvin Klein shoes
You see
It's these type of men women go stupid over
Including you
He just holds you for a moment
And you have a panic attack
Good Lord
It's like everything we
taught you was a waste
Well look
At least the guy's rich
and comes with medical insurance
Besides he's a doctor
so there's got to be benefits
I now want Lipo, forget the Facelift
Tell me straight up
Are you into him?
Of course not!
I don't fall that easily
Well good
Then the next time you see him,
you better teach him a lesson
No problem
Here here! Girls
Let's drink to
Tina's promise
You go girl!
Oh my God! You're so good!
You could be a pop star!
And when that soft light glows
and those baby birds chirp
and that clock chimes
That's when I'll let him have it!
The wine don't lie. I knew it, this is bad
We need to figure out a
way watch out for her
Oh My God
Control yourself!
Enlarge, bigger!
No - stop looking!
STOP LOOKING!
He's just too hot!
I wish he'd look over at me
Oh God! He just looked at me!
No - he was looking at me!
So adorable...
He's cute even when he's clumsy
Seriously, aren't you guys're
over doing it just a bit?
I'm gonna go do some real work
Jeez, what's her problem?
Isn't it obvious?
Totally
And where are you going?
Has everyone taken crazy pills?
He's not a freakin' celebrity!
Go away!
I don't want to laugh
I'm going to die anyway
Get help!
Now, Tom, don't be mad
We...
We're all here just trying to help
I'm sorry, it's all my fault
No, Miki, you did great
Don't worry about it
C'mon Tina think think think!
How did that song that he likes go?
You're just too good to be true
Can't take my eyes off you
You'd be like heaven to touch
I wanna hold you so much
At long last love has arrived
And I thank God I'm alive
You're just too good to be true
Can't take my eyes off you
I love you baby
And if it's quite all right
I need you baby to warm the lonely night
I love you baby
Trust in me when I say
Oh pretty baby don't bring me down I pray
Oh pretty baby now that I found you stay
And let me love you baby
Let me love you
Oh God! It's HIM!
All right, party's over.
Let's get back to work!
Dr. Lu
I didn't know you could dance so well
It's been a while, but your granddaughter
Quite a handful, isn't she?
I could barely keep up
Where's Tina?
Nurse Dorothy, where did Tina just go?
What time is it?
She probably ran off to the flower shop
Tina?
Everything's fine, it was just a dance
It's no big deal, everybody was doing it
Besides, I was just doing my job,
I'm sure he knew that
Tina?
Focus, Tina, Focus!
Right now you need to cut the stems!
Cut the stems! CUT THE STEMS!
Why can't I do anything right, right now?
Thorns!
CoCo, have I gone crazy?
I can't even cut flowers right
Don't move
Got it!
CoCo, do you know
You really should be more careful
on how you do things
What do you mean?
You just got to protect yourself
That's all I'm saying, all right?
What're we doing down here?
That guy... he's stalking me!
He's pretty cute!
Let him stalk you
CoCo! Remember the rules, the rules!
Okay, okay
So... what do we do now?
Go out there
But don't tell him I'm here
Why aren't you here?
Tell him I'm sick!
You're sick?
Tell him I died!
You died!
I've never seen you this nervous before
Do you like him?
Are you crazy! He...
He's a loser, punk
a gorgeous asshole!
And you!
You're so sexy... go out and seduce him
and he'll be drooling all over you
like a pervert!
Go! Seduce him!
But how do I do that?
Like this!
Oh God, look at those boobs!
Now go get him you sexy kitty!
Meow?
Excuse me?
That tickles
Hi! Stop, don't move!
I'm...
I said, don't move!
Not moving, not moving
I was just wondering...
Of course!
You just need to tell me
What you like and how you like it
And I'll do my best
To make you satisfied
Miss, I'm sorry
But your shirt
Sorry, I spilt some coffee on it
Is this guy homo?
Is this guy homo?
Is Tina here?
Is Tina here?
She's dead
She's dead?!
I said sick, not dead!
Oh, what I mean is
She's sick! Not dead
That's kind of a big difference
in the medical world
Tell him I have a disease!
She has a disease
A disease
What do you mean?
Like she's dying?
Can you tell me what kind of disease?
I think she got it
when she was traveling in India
Ginacuritus!
Ginacuritus?
Never heard of it?
I think monkeys sometimes get it
Well, if you see her,
can you please let her
know Brandon dropped by?
I will
Thank you
That was stressful
What's going on?
That guy
He's trying to make my life miserable
But, he doesn't seem like a bad person
You got it wrong!
And I'm not going to let ANY girl
fall into that man trap
I've got no choice
But to get rid of him
Time for some planning
The easiest way to destroy
a man
Is to make his life stink
And I don't mean just his reputation
I mean literally
make him stink
It doesn't matter
if he's dashing on the outside
Show people he's a slob on the inside
And it's bye bye pretty eyes
Dr. Lu
It's been a 36 hour shift for you
Don't you want to rest a bit?
I do
but
still got a presentation to do
Bye bye
Sorry to keep everyone waiting
Sorry, my shaver wasn't
working this morning
All right, so patient 301
needs to have his blood
checked every half hour
Dr. Lu
You showered, right?
Oh god, sorry, I think it's me
I'm really sorry
That's so yuck
Uh... I think I forgot my deodorant too
I'm sorry
I think it's coming from your shoes
No, it's definitely your pants
Hurry, we're on a tight schedule
And still have lots to do!
So the surgical program's success rates
have been very high
And this is extremely positive news
So in conclusion
I hope we can all keep building
on our good work
And become one of the most
successful neurosurgical hospitals
He's so MAN!
My Prince Charming!
He's too amazing
Thank you
And then he trashes all his clothes
Did he have a tight body?
Shut up
What the heck am I gonna do?
We're dealing with a serious guy here
He's not only survived
what you've thrown at him
But
Somehow come out even more popular from it
Right! So now
Looks like we've got no choice
Time to get serious here
You've got to go on a date with him
Go on a date with him?
Go on a date with him?
Discover what this guy's REALLY hiding
Discover what this guy's REALLY hiding
I just want him to go away
Well then quit whining
Well then quit whining
and take your game up a notch!
And take your game up a notch!
Girls
YES
Why the heck did he have to
come to this hospital?
Pizza... I smell Pizza!
Oh, I'm mixed ethnicity
Mixed? What're you a mix of?
I'm part Shandong, part Shanghainese
Miki, you're the best!
Miki Lin, Miki Lin,
please come to the Nursing Station!
No, no
I'll clean up... you go
Thanks
You sure do like falling...
And you're a hard person to track down
Well, I'm busy
Super busy
Crazy busy
I heard from your friend that
You're sick?
What're you talking about?
Oh right! I'm sick
Why'd she go tell you that
I'm sorry, I'm sorry!
But what exactly is Ginacuritus?
It's a disease that monkeys sometimes get
Don't you know that, Doctor?
I knew it!
But you're not a monkey...
All right! Then I got to go!
Wait!
...Sorry
But I just thought maybe
If you want,
we could go talk about Ginacurtitus
Over dinner
Oh thanks, but
I just ate. A lot
Gross isn't it?
Wait, how about this
If I can get you to laugh
Will you have dinner with me?
Are you kidding me dude?
Okay, here we go
There was this girl
she wanted to marry a man
that had two things:
One, he needed to be a
knight in shining armor
And two, he needed to have a chariot
So, she went to her computer
to search for a match
And it told her the answer was
Chinese chess!
You know - Chinese chess!
Because there's a knight and also a chariot
Chinese chess! Chinese...
What a retard...
I'll think about it, okay?
Hello, this is CoCo!
CoCo
What's up?
I have a date but don't
know what to wear...
Hello?
Been waiting long?
After you
How'd you hear of this place?
Oh, from your grandpa, he told me...
My grandpa?
Yes, your grandpa...
I'm sorry, sorry
It's ok, I need to go clean up really quick
What's wrong with me?
What am I gonna do?
Grandpa knows I'm on a date with Brandon
Calm down
Relax
I'm trying to relax too
Your grandpa's not the type
to tell everyone, okay?
Now what's our goal?
Take down Brandon
And get the real dirt on this dude
Very Good
Not you!
Now go have some fun
And destroy him
Okay? Don't call if it's not important
Excuse me, miss
May I need your help
You see my friend over there
He's having a hard time
getting over his last breakup
and feeling kind of down
So I was thinking
Maybe you might have the ability to
give him some extra attention?
You know, I've noticed there're
quite a lot of pretty girls here
Checking you out
Really?
Now, here's where
our hot, sexy dancers
are gonna bring out some of
you lucky people to dance!
C'mon honey, the show's about to start!
But wait!
It's show time
Song's not over yet
Pretty impressive.
I didn't know you could dance to Latin
Well I did live in Spain for a while
But that was a long time ago
Oh... for a girl?
Actually, I did residency
at a hospital in Barcelona...
Hola
You were pretty good back there
You were pretty amazing too
If you like, we could go dance in private
And what I serve is much better
than what they serve here
Ciao
Bye
Oh right, where was I?
I learned a lot in Barcelona
on surgical techniques
How did that have no effect?
And from such a sexy woman!
Is he really homo?
How about you?
How long have you been at the hospital?
Since Aar...
...A long time ago
Anyways, everyone's really good to me
whenever I volunteer
So, it makes me really happy
They are great people
And they really take care of me too
But every now
and then it still feels kinda lonely
You get lonely?
Doesn't everybody?
Thanks
Let's split it
Did you hear?
Tina went out with Dr. Lu?
I heard that she threw water in his face
No, I heard she sucker punched him
Or maybe she did both!
What're you guys doing?
Is it true?
Did you and Dr. Lu really
go out last night?
It was just dinner
Just dinner, no big deal
Where did you guys go?
Just some place called the Latin House
Well, did you guys...
Dance?
It's not like I had a choice
Brandon pulled me onto the floor
But that's not the big secret I discovered
See, the big secret is...
He already has a woman
No way!
Just check out the picture in his wallet
A doctor who's young and successful
Of course he's got a woman
But that doesn't mean
He's a good man
who doesn't cheat on her
The pig's lucky
I didn't sucker punch him in the face
Checkmate Brandon Lu
All of you shut up!
Making up all this crap
because of the way a person looks
It's all a load of BS
And you!
You got a mouth as black as your heart!
Don't you dare say his name?
Who was that?
That's Denise
Excuse me, do I know you?
Go away
You judgmental prick
Easy with the cursing okay?
What'd I ever do to you?
Stop acting like a dumbass
You know exactly what you did
Miss, you really need to learn some manners
Yeah
But at least I don't talk crap
behind people's back
Is Brandon your doctor?
Are you really retarded?
You're - you're the girl in that picture
Brandon's my brother
You don't know the first thing about him
What he's gone through
How could I have...?
I may be handicapped,
but at least my heart isn't rotten
Unlike you
You've got nothing but poison on the inside
Completely worthless
Why the long face?
Carlton, am I a horrible person?
No, don't be silly
Why would you say that?
What if I was lying to everyone
about Brandon today?
What if I was lying to everyone
about Brandon today?
Then that probably wasn't too bright
But good men don't exist anymore
And I thought he was just like the rest
You can't believe a word they say
All their sweet whispers and promises
Just turn into a knife
that cut your heart dry
Here, take a look at this
Maybe you'll see not all guys are animals
Love: You don't have to understand it,
describe it, or define it
This. Is. Crap.
You just know when love appears
Because when you wake up
the world feels a little less scary
Tina?
Why're you stalking me?
Um... may I join you?
What a coincidence
So, I met Denise today
She curses you out?
How'd you know?
She's my sister, I know her really well
I'm sorry about that,
she's really not a bad person
The pain's just made it tough for her,
and a little erratic
Never mind, let's talk about something else
I'm starving, what's good here?
Actually... Brandon's kinda cool
And his life's a lot more interesting
than I realized
Not only does he spend his free time
speaking and presenting
He also travels to third world nations
on medical missions work
He works out, like cooking,
and at times, stays in step with dancing
But spends most of his free time
taking care of Denise
Oh yeah
He also sponsors two kids in Africa
Then he said all this medical jargon
that I couldn't understand
But one thing's for sure
It's all so he can one day be invited
to speak at medical G2
conference in Beijing
And, if this hospital gets invited to G2
And, if this hospital gets invited to G2 My
research could save thousands of more lives
My research could save
thousands of more lives
But I've got to do a great job first
Because if I mess up, it could be years
before I get another opportunity like this
What?
How about you?
How did you get into Psychoneuroimmunology?
You mean Laughter Therapy?
I thought it was kinda silly, at first
But you know what?
I really do enjoy helping out my patients
I'm sure laughter has its merits
But you don't believe laughter's can heal,
right?
Tina, if laughter was all we needed
A lot more people in the world
wouldn't be in pain
All we've got is medicine, and science
But you can't deny how much
Laughter encourages people
Laughter encourages people
gives them hope
gives them hope
But they're all just temporary
Yeah, yeah, yeah. You're the smartest
I don't wanna argue with you
Stubborn pig!
Sorry, sorry!
I really didn't mean to do that
I tell you what
How about when we're at the hospital
When you're working,
I'll go check out what you do?
And when I'm working
you can come check out what I do?
Fine
And why not
make it a competition then
A competition?
Loser has to buy the
winner an expensive gift
Okay, let's do it then
(AUNT GLENDA)
(AUNT BING)
(AUNT LULU)
Genius!
Quite impressive, doctor
Your sock puppet wasn't too bad either
Want to grab something to eat?
I'm starving
I know this place with
really great Peking duck
Dr. Lu, we have an emergency in room 219
You should hurry
I'll just go pickup the food for us
Okay, thanks!
(Peking Duck)
Here, here I got you
Didn't anyone tell you to knock first?
I got it
Sorry!
You're slipping
I said I got it! Would you let go?
Jeez, let go!
Stop it you STINKING GUAVA!
You're a STINKING DURIAN!
Well, please let this Durian help, okay
All right!
I sincerely apologize to you
Your brother... is a really great ma...
Nice person
I was wrong
Do you like him or something?
No way
Why not?
Everyone does
I feel so hungry all of a sudden
If there was only some Peking duck
But I got this for Brandon
I knew you liked him!
Faker
Oh, relax
My brother's already married - to his work
I won't tell him nothing
Oh, don't worry about this
He'd do anything for me
Sometimes I get really pissed about that
Pissed?
Because he thinks this is all his fault
But it's really not...
Whatever
I never liked heels anyway
Denise
Can you tell me what happened?
Denise was actually brilliantly talented
Admired at school,
with a bright future ahead of her
Don't you know
that's a limited edition basketball?
Go get it already
Hurry up!
Denise was rushed to the hospital
For emergency surgery
But she suffered major blood loss
and damage to her spinal cord
In the end, the doctors
couldn't do anything
Brandon blamed himself for it all
And swore he'd help Denise walk again
So he spent all his time
and energy to be a doctor
So he spent all his time
and energy to be a doctor
Brandon says this is
the only G2 union hospital that
may be granted a surgical program
to cure my legs
So all these years of hard work
It was for you
To go to Beijing? To go to G2?
Well duh!
It sucks always living
in a stupid ass hospital
And you
You're actually all right
But you sure do say the ugliest things
So what you're saying is
We're actually quite alike
I'm tired
Don't forget your blanket
and catch a cold now
You really should stop
sleeping on the job now
Looks like you really are tired...
What's wrong with me?
And you...
Did I fall asleep...?
You know
When you're not all feisty,
you're really pretty
Why're you looking at me like that?
Never seen anyone drool before?
What are you thinking?
And what're you doing?
Should I run... or maybe I should just...
Wait! Why should I let you...
But... I don't...
it's been so long since...
So long...
DAMN!
Tina! Why haven't you been picking up?
You've got some explaining to do!
YES!
See! Not every girl falls for your tricks!
YES!
I told you seducing him would work!
Yes! Yes!
Please, let this be a dream!
Please! This can't be real,
I have to be dreaming!
Tina! Where are you going?
Come back! Come...
Will this make you feel better?
Sometimes I think
I'm a pretty horrible person
Nonsense
You're one of the sweetest girls I know
Sweet?
Would someone sweet punch a guy like that
His nose was even bleeding
You were just scared
because he got close to you
Have a bite
You've never tried this one before
Why would he scare me?
Because you care that
he'll see into your heart
So you punched Mr. Perfect
If he's Mr. Perfect, he'll forgive you
Please, there's no such
thing as Mr. Perfect
If something like this happened to me
I wouldn't even forgive myself
It's not like Mr. Perfect isn't human
He'll still get upset
And feel sadness
But if he can cherish you,
the real you, all of you
Then he's your Mr. Perfect
But what if I'm not his Mrs. Perfect?
That's okay
You can still apologize and be good friends
Dr. Lu, I just want to apologize for...
Sorry, I must have the wrong office
No, no, you're right
This is his office,
he's just not in yet
Oh! That's okay, I'll
come back later then...
I'm so sorry! I'm so sorry!
You all right there?
Be more careful, or you'll make a mess
Are you...
Tina Liang?
How do you know me?
I've heard so much about you
Hi. I'm Lisa
Didn't think I'd run into you so soon
You've been running my
Laughter Therapy program, haven't you?
YOU'RE DR. LI?
But, you're
(Gorgeous)
(Perfect)
(A Bitch)
Supposed to be out of the country?
But I just returned
And
I've already heard about what you did
How you punched Brandon?
Don't worry
Brandon's a man, he won't
hold it against you
But
if you really want to make it up to him
my suggestion is you
leave him alone for now
he still has a sister to take care of
And really doesn't have time
to babysit little girls
Tina? There you are! I've been...
Brandon!
Lisa?
Aren't you supposed to be in...
Wait, does this mean?
Yes!
Really? How'd you do it!
Tina! Lisa and I...
Brandon, I found this great
research while in Beijing
I got to show you, come on!
Hurry!
Okay
I'm glad I punched him
Helps me remember
That I'm not even the right type for him
Tina
You don't have to change yourself
for other people
You are your own type
I hate my type
If you're always focused on yourself
You'll never find
the clarity to see other people
As perfect as he may be
He still doesn't know
what you're thinking inside
It's true there're lots
of bad guys out there
But there're still some good ones
that'll always take care
and protect the girl
they hold close to their heart
and protect the girl they hold close to their
heart Do you think Brandon's that type?
Do you think Brandon's that type?
Do you think Brandon's that type?
Beats me
Well, at first, I swore
He was just another gorgeous asshole
But in the end,
all I see is his heart and determination
It's good you can see that in him
Yeah, but I don't have
any of those things in me
I can't even compete with that Dr. Li
I wish I could just be like you CoCo?
So pretty with a hot body
You don't have to envy anyone
It's a miracle that you
actually met someone
that your heart both feels and hurts for
Do you know how many women
wish they could have that?
Because that's how you know
what you really feel deep down
And it makes your love story a real one
That's some deep stuff
I've never even asked you
How many boyfriend have you had?
Including last week?
To be exact, I believe it's...
Zero
Then how can you still believe in true love
when you've never even met your Mr. Perfect
Just because I haven't doesn't mean I won't
But with that face,
those boobs, and those legs
You always have guys lining up for you!
Thank you!
What I'm saying is you ain't right!
Tina
It doesn't matter when
we'll meet our true love
We just have to keep believing we will
Why can't this all just be easy?
Why does love have to be so complicated?
Because you're just lovesick
And everyone's waiting
For that someone who can help cure us of it
What's with the long face?
Something bad happen?
Nothing
I just... really successfully
Screwed everything up
Hey, as long as you can laugh about it
You're going to be all right
Thanks
I feel even worse now
All right
I want you to know
That you've really helped us here
Even our medicine
tastes better now
To be honest, we're grateful for you
C'mon
Give me a nice, big, happy smile
Tina
Your grandpa wants to see you in 10 minutes
Crap
What's the psycho witch doing here?
I'm sorry about earlier
I feel like we got off on the wrong foot
I heard you've been doing
such a great job with my program
I was actually a little... jealous
Jealous?
For real?
Thank you Tina
For being there for my patients
when I was away
It was the right thing to do
Did I really misunderstand her?
Can you forgive me?
It's no big deal Dr. Li
Please, call me Lisa
You know, she's actually kinda all right
Looks like you two have already met
Tina
I have absolutely wonderful news for you
In these last few months,
you've been doing such a great job
That you've been recommended to be
the next supervisor to take over
the laughter program
Are you for real?
Of course I'm for real
And this wouldn't have happened without
Dr. Li's recommendation on your behalf
Lisa... you?
Congratulations Tina
Will you take it?
I promise I won't let you guys down!
But what about you, Lisa?
Dr. Li will be leaving us, unfortunately
This week actually
Oh yeah!
Oh, that's horrible
Dr. Li will be leaving
to represent our hospital
at the G2 Medical Conference in Beijing
And she'll be going with Dr. Brandon Lu
The people at G2 are very interested
in Brandon's research
And if all goes well
Together, they'll be speaking in Beijing
and then all over the world
over the next 4 years
And pioneering the future of
Neurosurgery with Laughter Therapy
Oh that's... that's great news
I knew you'd be happy for us
In fact
we were going to throw a big party
to congratulate your promotion
And I guess
We can make it a farewell party
for Brandon and I also
I know
what Brandon needs is
a mature and capable woman
And once we're in Beijing
I'll make sure we have a good life together
But I want to thank you
For being such a good sister to him
Tina
Where've you been?
I've been looking for
you these last few days
I just, wanted to talk about
what happened that night
Right...
Sorry for punching you that night
What's going on?
Nothing
Nothing's going on
Stop acting like nothing's up
You're gonna leave anyways
what else is there to talk about
Just 4 years, right?
Actually, 5
You should go celebrate
It's something you've
been working so hard for
I know
It's just... I don't know why...
And Lisa... she's been so good to me
Yeah, unlike me
She understands you
She knows what's best for you
What are you talking about?
Congratulations
You won
Here
That was our deal
Loser buys winner a prize
I...
Did I do something wrong?
Why do you just feel so distant right now
Once you're in Beijing
It'll feel further
What the hell!
Definitely excited I'll be returning
to Taiwan to kick off the tour
Then it'll be China and
a lot of other stops
I'm looking forward to
showing everyone a brand new Aaron
Stop hiding
What is it?
It's a love letter from Jin He
And then, he slowly held my hand
And I was so surprised
My heart felt like
it was going burst out of my chest
Tina
You know all those rules you told me about
I don't want them
And I don't need them
What do you mean?
I just want to tell Jin
That I love him already!
NO!
He just held your hand
Aren't you afraid you're going to get hurt?
Rule #3
True love doesn't exist
No!
Your rules suck!
So you do, love him?
What if he doesn't love you back?
But if I don't tell him,
I'll regret it for sure
I'd rather try to love,
than be scared all my life
It's just giving yourself a chance
I hate never knowing and living in fear
And all those crazy rules of yours
To be honest
They're all just excuses
because you're afraid
So...
He means that much to you?
He means that much to me too...
That much to me...
Miki, what time is it?!
Are you ok?
No, not okay!
Where to?
The airport!
Can you please hurry!
Oh my god!
Sir, I'm so sorry
But I forgot my wallet
But I really need to tell someone
that I love him!
But I really need to tell someone that I love him!
I've seen folks like you before
I've seen folks like you before
Especially from the
Ximending (party) district
Get out if you can't pay!
I'm not like that at all!
I'm Tina Liang
I work at that hospital back there
Please! I promise I'll pay you back
I just need to make that 9 o'clock flight
Because this is the first time,
I want to believe in...
Love
Love!
All right
Hang on now!
Which airport are we going to?
Oh crap! I don't know
Wait! Wait!
Hello?
I'm in the middle of retrieving my youth,
I don't have time for your crap
Tina Liang
I hope you know what you're doing
Girls
Pull out your smart phones,
we've got work to do!
Okay!
Hey! You big STUPID GUAVA!
Open your eyes!
I hope you rot and rot and rot!
Hurry up and tell me which airline!
Oh damn
Mandarin Airlines and Eva Airlines
both have a 9 o'clock flights
Calm down
Is there any smart person around
that you can ask?
Freak, freak, watch the freakin' road
watch the freakin' road!
Freakin' road!
Um... Sir
do you think it's Mandarin Airlines
Or Eva Airlines?
Mandarin!
It has to be Mandarin Airlines!
I took their flight when I went to Beijing
for my Wushu competition
(Donnie Yen)
Their flight attendants are so pretty
It's Mandarin Airlines!
Donnie Yen says it's Mandarin Airlines!
D- D- Donnie Yen is in the car with you?!
Stop joking around!
I'm telling you
Mandarin Airlines is in the first terminal
Hurry up
Hello, I'd like to check...
I found it!
Mandarin Airlines 9: 05
direct flight to Beijing Boarding gate B7
You hear that
B7, GO!
I told you it's Mandarin Airlines!
All right - rocket fire!
My taxi is a god damn rocket!
We're here
Here? Thank you!
Go get him back!
Sorry! Sorry!
Miss!
Sorry ma'am but you can't cut in line
Please just hear me out
My name is Tina Liang
And you have a passenger
named Brandon Lu, who's...
I'm sorry ma'am
But I can't help you unless
you show your passport and ticket
Molly
Your name is Molly, right?
Molly, have you ever made a mistake
One that you truly regretted
Have you ever genuinely loved someone?
Have you ever genuinely loved someone?
But because you were scared of getting hurt
But because you were scared of getting hurt
You pushed him away
Pushed away your happiness
Have you ever said dumb
things you didn't mean
And only when you wanted to
finally tell him how you felt
He already left your world
Molly, please, I'm begging you to help me
I have to let him know how I feel
And we're SO close
Please, please help me
Miss!
Get out of here!
You're causing trouble for us all
And there're people still waiting
Take it
It's my ID card
Just take it!
Hurry! Go!
Stop! Stop right there!
But I have this! I have this!
STOP RIGHT THERE! STOP! STOP!
Brandon! Brandon!
Tina?
Tina!
Brandon!
Brandon!
Tina, what're you doing here?
I don't know
I mean I do know!
I- I gotta to tell you something
Something horrible
Something really bad
But I really have to tell you
I... I...
What's happened?
Brandon, I've screw up a lot of things
I...
I'm really pathetic
And I'm horrible!
I've acted like a monkey,
a crazy diseased monkey
What am I saying?
I'm trying to say that
Today, I spoke with a girl
She...
She was afraid
But she knew one thing
She didn't have much courage
But she knew this one thing was
really important to her
And that's why I'm here
And I don't have courage either
And I'm all out of time
But I really have to tell you that...
I don't know why you're
always so good to me!
Because I love you
I don't know why but
I get all nervous when I see you
I really don't understand why
I know you're kinda crazy
Sometimes mean
You hit hard like a man
I think there's something wrong with me
And I'm a doctor and I don't get it
But I do know one thing
And that is, I love you
Do you...
Can you can tell me
If you want me to stay
Then I'll stay
I do I do, please don't leave me
I don't want to pretend anymore
Please don't hurt me
I'm so tired
Tina!
What're you doing here?
Brandon
The whole flight's waiting because of you
Let them wait!
You don't have to tell me how you feel
I can understand
But if you tell me to stay
I'll stay
But, if he stays
What'll happen to all
those years of research?
And what about Denise?
I can't be this selfish
Because of you
I can finally walk away from my past
And feel love again
But, I can't do this to you
Because if I do
I'll just be like
all the other wretches out there
And I'll never forgive myself for it
Hey! What're you doing? Let her go!
Sorry sir, but this lady needs to leave,
and you need to board the plane now
Go
What?
Go. And don't ever look back
Is this what you really want?
Go! And don't come back
Say something
Say something!
Don't forget me...
Hi everyone
Honey
Everything's gonna be all right
I'm good
Oh, it's no big deal, really
I'm really glad he left
Just like that
You guys want to know
what he said to me?
He actually said if I told him to stay
Then he would stay
Such a liar
I did it
I finally...
I finally got rid of him
I'm so happy that he's gone
So happy...
Aaron?
Tina?
It's really you!
It's you...
It's been such a long time
The last time I saw you was...
How have you been?
All these years
I should actually ask YOU
How do think a girl that
got broken would feel?
Do you have any idea
how hard these years have been?
Rule #1
Always be on guard against men
Rule #2
Learn to be your own hero
Rule #3
True love doesn't exist
You taught me that
Until the day I met him
Who made me forget all those god damn rules
But all I could do was watch him leave
Are you happy now?
Now that I've got nothing
But I still want you to know
Even if I'll never see him again
I still want to say
I love Brandon Lu
I love him, I love him
I love him, I love him, I love him
I love Brandon Lu, can you hear me!
Did you hear what I said?
Me?
You!
It's all because of you!
Tina
I'm really sorry
Poke him in the eyes!
Doctor! Doctor!
How is she?
Trauma to the head, blood
pressure is normal
Brandon
Are you okay?
How about I get you something to drink?
That girl is a crazy lunatic!
I can't believe she punched Aaron
I heard Aaron even had to cancel his tour
All because of her
(Aaron attacked by crazy fan!)
Something wrong?
Nothing
Let's go
And not be late for...
I love Brandon Lu
I love him, I love him
Brandon!
I love Brandon Lu, I love Brandon Lu
Can you hear me! Can you hear me!
I love him, I love him, I love him
I love Brandon Lu! Can you hear me!
Can you hear me!
Brandon
This girl's really not worth it
It took you so much time just to get here
Are you really going to throw it all away?
There're still a lot of people
who need your help
Especially your sister Denise
Brandon
Congratulations Lisa
You just got promoted
I don't understand
Why are you such an idiot?
What is it that she has that I don't
My heart
Lisa
That girl has my heart
Brandon?
My sweet Princess!
You're finally awake
You had us all scared out of our minds
I'm sorry, Grandpa
I didn't mean to scare you
It's all right
I know you're a fighting princess
How do you feel now?
Like I just got the beat down
I'm kinda tired
And kinda sad
Because of Brandon?
But I guess it's all too late
It's not too late
Sleeping on the job are you?
Still asleep?
Not afraid I'll punch you again?
I'm sorry
You're here
I'm here
You hope you meet that person one day
Who loves you for you. The real you
And that if you were down
and out and lost it all
Somehow, you'll still have a place
In their heart
Maybe this type of love is asking too much
in modern relationships these days
But if you can just keep
believing in true love
Then maybe lovesick people like us
Can finally find our cure
Of course
You can choose not to believe in love
Then I can recommend you to join ADW
I'm hungry
My aunties will happily welcome you in
My aunties will happily welcome you in
They'll even give you a
membership discount!
Hello, are you still there? Hello?
That, yes yes yes
Ariel, you didn't...
Damn, that surprised me
I'm the best man, David. D - A...
I'm the best man, David... Tao
I'm Korean
Korean? When did you come to Taiwan?
Because I'm mixed
What're you a mix of?
Shandon and Shanghainese
Shandon and Shanghainese
That has nothing to do with Korea
With that beautiful face,
plastic doll breasts... sorry!
Because there's a knight and a chariot!
Here! We're here!
We're here
Where the hell are you looking!
Go get him back!
Wing Chun!
Snake!
Tiger!
Eagle!
You can do it!
I need to find... I found it...
Brandon! Brandon!
She was too fast!
Did you feel the electricity?
I'm so pretty! I'm a pretty man! Yeah!
Brandon Lu
Do you take this beautiful
lady as your wife?
I do
Tina Liang, Do you take this...
Don't ever ask me if I love you
Even if one day
I lose my memory and forget my own name
I promise I'll never forget you
Because you
made me believe
that anything's possible
Well, let's not wait any longer
I now pronounce you husband and wife
Brandon, you may...