Meet the Khumalos (2025) Movie Script

1
Oh, wow.
In my day, we'd send
over sensible gifts, you know.
Like chicken! Do you know a live chicken?
Yes, or a sheep's head.
Not like these
kasi-rolls that you all make.
Make it snappy, girls.
Fold that thing nicely.
-Wow, Dad! You're exploiting us.
-Wow. Wow.
How's it going?
My love.
You walked here?
I just wanted to feel
-KwaMashu one last time.
-Hm? Yes.
Mom, in the trash?
Do you know what
that billboard did for you?
How do you think
your school fees were paid?
-We are so sorry!
-You've been telling us this story.
-Lu, you be quiet!
-You know what?
What do you think
was feeding you all these years?
-Sorry then.
-Okay.
And what's with the dirt in the house?
This is not just dirt.
It's Mavis Miracle Mud,
if you didn't know.
-Dismiss that thought.
-Morning, morn
Mrs Steinberg says
our neighbours are politicians.
Mrs Steinberg thinks every Black person
So cute!
-Let's go! Let's get them!
-Let's get them!
-Yeah, yeah!
-My love!
You don't think we should invite
the neighbours for your memulo?
After all, white people love those things.
No, Mom. It's Memulo.
The Sitholes! The Jobes.
Here we come.
-Leaving. We're leaving, Ma.
-Go! Go!
Go back to whatever
sewerage you came out of!
The only sewerage is you.
Get back inside the house!
Get back in the house!
Didn't you hear me?!
Back in the house!
You're right on time.
I don't want to judge you,
but you look like a crazy woman.
Hello!
-Okay, let me go.
-Let's go, let's go.
She thinks she can invade my privacy?
You Satan!
You know, someone is going to die today!
I'm going to kill someone today.
-I'm from KwaMashu!
-Mom, what's wrong?
Me! I'm Bongi Goodmore Sithole.
Over my dead body!
Get her, Goodmore wakwaMashu!
Stop it.
Your move, you Satan.
Grace, come quickly.
Run so we can watch Sizwe!
-Hurry up, man!
-I'm coming!
I was busy out there
-with that crazy Bongi.
-Turn it on, turn it on!
-children's futures, they share this,
-My grandson!
-I'm telling you.
-then it's the parent who should
It will make you look beautiful.
Keep it on
for 20 minutes before you rinse.
I think that's enough. Hm. It looks good.
Just a little more.
Let me just put a bit more here.
No, my sister.
I tell you, fire!
you need to stop monitoring those cameras.
I'm out.
Oh, you're leaving already?
You look beautiful.
-Thank you.
-Have I told you how proud I am of you?
Yeah, when will you be back?
Is that Satan's son?
My friend Nandi from campus.
The day I get my hands
on that demon of yours--
-Amandala!
-Is ours! Ours, ours!
Oh, I can't scream,
but your son can kidnap
Oh, my father
-must be turning in his grave.
-No, I saw them leave in the car together.
-and leave me alone.
-Hey, you!
-What? What?
-Hey you!
-Don't you dare talk to me like that!
-What will you do about it?
-Gracious! Gracious!
-What do you want from me?
Hey, you Satan! You second-hand!
Oh, wow! Chiefs, the Boys
of Peace and Tranquility.
My brother! So you come here too?
You know, this is my hometown.
Des, tell me,
-did you watch the game last night?
-Don't even mention it!
It just causes me heartburn.
No, no, no.
You know, my friend,
I feel like I'm in a toxic relationship.
-What are you doing here?
-I know where the kids are.
-We.
-Me and you?
I saw the booking, okay?
-Just let me sit in the front seat.
-No, no, no, no, no.
Hey, how's the planning for umemulo going?
Armani? Oh wow! My oreo.
Okay, green, green! Here.
Okay.
Where are you going?
-My friend
-Yes.
You brought a whole restaurant with you?
Grace doesn't approve
of me eating just anything, and anywhere.
No, man.
I can't let you
do that to yourself! Never.
Have some.
-Okay.
-Have some.
Yes! Yes.
It's just that
What will Grace say?
You know
There's things Grace should never know.
Have some.
Have some.
So get lost!
-I try.
-Wow.
This I like.
Stop annoying me! You irritant!
-You can just get lost!
-Just shut up!
That's right!
It's called burnt meat.
My Des-des.
-Ah, mama.
-Listen, listen.
Let me tell you something.
-I've got an idea for a skincare business.
-That's good news, ma'am.
Good for you! It's just that my wife is--
Listen, this thing
is imported from Maropeng--
I'm pretty sure
it's just clay from the taxi rank.
Business man, listen,
-you're going to promote it.
-Goodness! Me?
Because I see you
sneaking around with Vusi.
I see you.
I've got my eye on you.
Where have you been?
My sister, people are hustling out there.
I was also hustling.
Oh, are you referring
to Mavis Miracle Mud?
Here you go.
What? Are you starving?
My dad would turn in his grave.
They're just adolescents, you understand?
Gross.
-back to that little township of yours.
-It's Sphe.
For Siphesihle, as you well know, Grace.
Whoa, don't you dare insult me.
All I'm asking is for you
to take some responsibility
for your memulo.
-After all, it's your memulo.
-But you're on top of it though.
things around the house,
you guys, your father,
Oh, shame.
I'm so sorry, I can't help you much.
My neck is just so
Where is that massage gun of yours?
-I think it's in the kitchen cupboard.
-Okay.
-No way.
-Phe-phe, get that for me, please.
-Thanks for coming, I made tripe.
-Hello.
So, Zakhele, Tell me.
-What are you up to these days?
-Yes.
-Are you working?
-I do work, sir. I um
I have no clue what he means.
In other words, Dad, he's a rapper.
You see, guys,
on my last beat, I got 300 views.
Summer, Ibiza.
-Ibiza?
-On me.
-Memulo planning.
-You got a mems coming up?
I need you to do some work for me.
-Phe-Phe is going to need a driver.
-Uh, Ma,
You see? Ah then. It's settled.
Okay then, Zakhele.
-You'll start tomorrow.
-Yo, that's sick.
Wow, you have such a lovely face.
Such smooth skin.
Man, you would be perfect for my brand.
Here, take this, um
Have your friends call me.
Miracle Mud, my sister.
a photoshoot with that face
would do your brand wonders.
So, my man,
who's this hottie?
-No!
-No.
Gosh.
it is because I am made new, brethren.
-Where did you find that?
-But as I stand before
-In the kitchen, like you said.
-you today, it is because I have prayed
-from inside of me, brethren.
-Hallelujah!
-and vileful spirit I have inside of me
-But it really works! I'll tell you that.
-Stop judging me.
-Yes! Amen, brethren.
It's for Gran's business.
-Please.
-We're all doing this for Gran.
So, did you speak to the council?
Oh, I'll add it to my very long list.
-Thank you, my child! Thank you.
-Thank you, ma'am.
Alright, bet! Plus I got
that new tune for your mom.
Mtungwa! The Khumalos are so smart.
So, tell me. Where should we set up?
Grace, my sister.
I'm watching you.
-Oh, with these two?
-No, I see you.
You are busy trying to wangle your way in.
You are trying
to get a piece of the action.
-Wha-- Mud action? No!
-Back off, sister.
This is my empire
that I'm trying to build.
You're not a part of it
and you're irritating my board.
Do you have a tax number?
What's that?
How was KwaMashu?
It was nice.
You think you've hit the jackpot with me?
We'll talk.
-Mrs Dunga, how much is this bag of taro?
-Fifty rand.
You are so costly!
No, no, no.
-Hey, sir.
-Okay, call Satan.
How much is this, my brother?
Well, that's 500 rand.
Five hundred?
-Five hundred.
-Goodness.
-Okay, I'll take it.
-Five hundred, right?
Listen, bro.
Des, isn't that
My friend.
We saw nothing.
We know nothing, we say nothing.
You know what?
I don't even know
what we were talking about.
Exactly.
Goodness!
Oh, Mrs. Mavis.
Tell me, aren't you
that friend that Grace hates?
Well, let me tell you something.
Any enemy of hers is a friend of mine.
Oh, Mrs Mavis! She can't be that bad.
-Oh, you don't know her.
-Why don't you get her something
nice like taro or cow's head?
What? Cow's head?
That white person?
Since that the meat truck
is here, let me just grab a cow's head.
Oh, no, no, no.
-This is not the best meat, Ma.
-But I know this man.
He sells really good meat.
-Okay, okay, then let me get it for you.
-Alright, thank you, my child.
Cow's head.
She wants a cow's head.
-You're looking so gorgeous.
-Yes, Ma.
You have a good character.
-Goodness, bring it.
-You're respectful and hospitable.
-Yes, Ma.
-You're not like your friend.
-Yes, Ma! Thank you, Ma.
-Yes, nothing at all.
-Shh! It's coming.
-I like you.
Give me that plastic!
-Are you cooking that cow's head?
-Yeah, Bongiwe, give me a second.
These taxis are going to leave me.
-Here you go! Okay, Ma.
-Thank you! I like you so much.
-Thank you, my child.
-Alright.
-Okay then! Alright.
-Yes, Ma.
But you know what?
-I also want cow's head.
-Alright.
-Okay, thank you.
-I'll pay it for you.
-There she is.
-No, man! Who--
-I was assaulted! I didn't even see Sizwe.
-Here she comes! Here she comes.
Yes, yes, yes!
-I love it.
-Give it more, um
-Yes I love it! I love it.
-I'm thinking Diana Ross in the Supremes.
-Okay.
-Hold off on Diana.
Do a Mzansi pose, my child.
Do you know Mabrrr?
Do a Mabrrr pose! Brenda Fassie! Brrr.
Okay, imagine God
or angels bringing
you something beautiful.
Stretch out your hands
-and receive it.
-No, think about touching the sky,
-as if you're just touching finesse.
-You won't reach the sky.
She won't reach the sky.
Imagine a woman who owes you
a lot of money.
No, I'm thinking
-give it more graceful
-Look at her like a lion.
-walkway.
-Look at her like you will bite her.
-Like you're going to say "Haaa!"
-Like walkway.
-Like you're going to bite her.
-Walk.
-No, no. Not anger, not anger.
-Yes, hold it like that.
Like you're flying.
Yes, there you go.
-I like that one too.
-How are you?
-Look who's here! Hi!
-Yes.
So Zakes Wabantu
is asking if we can play his rap song
-No, don't worry about me.
-Sizwe, get comfortable, my boy.
-Strong, masculine! Yes.
-Dig in, dig in.
-Rub it in nicely.
-Yes. Okay.
Start from the bottom
-and go up with it.
-Alright, and then Siz, can you just take
-her thigh and put it on your waist?
-No, man! Why is her thigh in this?
-You'll see, Mavis.
-Yes?
-Go all the way up
-Siz in her-- Yes.
-with it.
-Okay.
-No man, why are they looking
-Okay.
into each other's eyes when we
still need them to apply the chilli one.
No, Phe-phe.
-We're still busy.
-One second, Mama, come on.
Phe-phe, what's wrong?
Do you need any more?
Are we done?
My love, listen.
I need you at Phe-phe's rehearsal.
-Des, aren't you my ride, brother?
-We'll celebrate with Sphesile
We'll celebrate her purity
We'll celebrate
We'll celebrate with Sphesihle
We'll celebrate her purity
We'll celebrate
Thank you, my children.
What's going to happen now is
-we're going to talk about the importance
-Maybe you can talk
about common decency
because one of your ladies here
And who is this now?
Someone with no respect, Ma.
-I didn't send that. It's not--
-Let me see.
-planned this whole thing, we--
-Wait, wait.
You are also involved in this?
Excuse me?
Betraying you again?
We were supposed
to leave KwaMashu and go to
-They're not good.
-Hey, no, no, no.
-No, don't talk! Don't you dare talk
-Oh, she didn't
-about my family like this.
-tell you?
-Back off, Des.
-You didn't tell him?
No, no! Talk to your wife.
I wanted you to have this.
It's a picture of my mother and father.
-It's for you.
-That woman is made of stone.
A stone!
-It's enough!
-She just says what she wants
-and she even doesn't think.
-Um, Bongi, I don't think
-Look, I didn't--
-No, Ma. Please.
Please give my friend and I some space.
-You'll strangle me.
-Can you just for two minutes
What are you doing?
Lu, what are you doing?
There Somewhere there.
Thank you my parents
-Oh, Mom and Dad you raised me
-You raised me under hardship
Because you can now
see the fruits of your labour
-Thank you Mom and Dad
-Thank you parents
-Oh, Mom and Dad you raised me
-You raised me under hardship
I want to tell you
something from the bottom of my heart.
-Tell them.
-No, tell them.
No, you tell them first.
No, you go first.
We have an announcement for our families.
Me
and Vusi
We've had enough.
-Yeah, no.
-We don't need your permission anymore.
-We've had enough.
-They're drunk.
We're good.
But
please.
You look beautiful.
Take these plates.
Oh, Mom.
I have a surprise.
Your photoshoot with Charlotte.
It's for your campaign.
It's so beautiful! It's so beautiful.
-Oh, I love it.
-So, Ma, if you agree,
we'll print them, put them on pamphlets,
-and start marketing.
-Thank you.
-Grace, my child.
-Yes, Mom.
I see how much you care about this family.
I looked into my heart
and I realised I need to be more kind.
Are you alright?
I'm trying-- I'm trying
to be kind and heal internally.
Okay, thank you, but
it's funny.
-Let's not do this again.
-Let's not do it again.
But I need a favour.
Mom, please move the mud out of my garage.
No.
Girl, you're stepping on my toes now.
Mavis, please pass the kasi-roll.
Oh, now you're getting along?
What veg is this? It's delicious, hey.
This.
That's sheep's head, my girl.
Subtitle translation by: Anu Akiyode