The Least Untrue (2022) Movie Script
- Answer your phone,
I was downstairs tex...
Hmm... texting.
Mmhh...
Well, that was fast.
Why didn't you text ?
- Who are you ?
- Uhh... ohhh...
- Who am I ? Who the fuck are you ?
- Uhm... Where is Ben ?
- Oh, he's up...
Wait, wait. What...
How do you know Ben ?
- Where's Ben ?
- Who are you exactly ?
- Does Ben know you're here ?
- Does Ben know you're here ?
- How did you get in ?
- There's a key, under the mat.
[911 on line, what do you...]
- Oh no, no, no. Wait, wait, wait.
I'm Ben's boyfriend.
He left a note... in there.
I'm just waiting.
He went out to get dinner.
Hi.
I'm sorry I startled you.
I''m Caleb.
- [Hello, hello]
- Hi.
- [Hello... sir...]
- I'm Ben's husband
- [Are you all right ? Hello ?
Are you are you still there ?
Sir !?]
- Four months.
- Two and a half years.
- Shit...
- Yep.
- So I...
Yes, you live here ?
- Yes.
- Oh, that...
that's why you have...
the keys.
- That is why I have... the keys.
Yes.
- I'm not in love with him.
I mean it was, it was headed there,
but... not...
... takes me a while...
- Where's the note ?
- In the kitchen.
- I was supposed to be in Stockholm.
Did he tell you I was a pilot ?
- I... hmm...
He never mentioned you.
- It's a surprise,
two extra days off.
- Hmm... Should I go ?
I... I should... probably go.
- I was just about to ask if I should...
- No. I, I... I should go.
I mean, please. You have... hmm...
sen... seniority.
Ehm...
Hmm... I'm sorry. That came out weird.
I'm nervous.
- Where did you meet ?
- Grindr.
- Ah... !
Yes
- Why not ?
Well, isn't that where everyone meets ?
- We met at Kagosha.
It's a gallery.
- Art ?
- Yes.
- I... hmm...
I didn't know Ben was into art
- He's not really.
- Did you text him ?
- No.
No. He's picking up dinner,
Tandoori probably, eh !
Maybe it's not his favorite.
- Hmm... I can text him.
- What would you even say ?
- I don't know,
maybe calling him an asshole
would be a good place to start.
- Do you want him still ?
- Don't be weird.
- Ugh... !
Aaahhh...
When he gets here,
I'm gonna pick up this paperweight.
He got it in Mexico City
as a present for me,
but I've always hated it.
I mean who buys this ?
What kind of Indiana
farm boy tourist are you ?
I'm gonna break it across his skull
and watch his brain spill out
and his blood
splatter across the wall
that we painted last spring.
Weird enough for you ?
Thirsty ?
Hmm...
Have you met his mother ?
- Ugh...
I haven't met any of his friends.
It's been...
dinners, movies, concerts,
casual
- And fucking.
It's okay.
- Yes.
- He does have a nice dick, doesn't he ?
- Hmm... I'm gonna go.
- Sorry.
- No really, you, you're upset.
- Leaving won't fix that.
Staying won't either.
Do whatever you wanna do.
Oh, his mother
is third generation's bane on New Jersey
answers the door in
her house coat,
feeds the cat off her
plate the whole dine
Edna Turnblad
He's embarrassed,
but she's fabulous in a horrible trashy way.
If she were a drag queen,
she'd win a Guggenheim.
- What do you want from me ?
- I want you to...
disappear ?
And to never have existed.
Too late, uh...
So...
I'll settle for you staying with me
in my living room,
waiting
to confront the bastard when he...
shows up with dinner
for two.
I wonder who he'll pick ?
- Tse...
he's yours.
- You're adorable
like it's easy,
you're cuter than I am.
You're like
closeted movie star hot.
- You're handsome too
and smart.
- Can you kiss ?
It's, ehmm...
his secret ?
Kryptonite
Pretty boys are like...
subway rats in this town,
everywhere. But...
a good kisser,
that's rare,
rarer than diamonds.
- I mean, I do okay.
- Four months ?
You have to do better than okay.
Do you want to kiss me ?
- Yes.
No.
- Me too.
Show me.
Pull the trigger.
Consent is given.
Go.
[Music]
- He's yours if you want him
- He'll be back any minute.
- I can't, I can't. Not right now, hmm...
I need air.
I need a bartender
to pour me a drink,
I need to... uhh...
I need to kiss like you kiss.
- Well, I'm not staying here either.
Fuck that !
- Don't you want him ?
- Hmm... I...
I'm not someone's weekend bitch.
It's not what I want.
Where are you going
for that drink again ?
- There's a hole in the wall
around the corner.
[Music till the end]
I was downstairs tex...
Hmm... texting.
Mmhh...
Well, that was fast.
Why didn't you text ?
- Who are you ?
- Uhh... ohhh...
- Who am I ? Who the fuck are you ?
- Uhm... Where is Ben ?
- Oh, he's up...
Wait, wait. What...
How do you know Ben ?
- Where's Ben ?
- Who are you exactly ?
- Does Ben know you're here ?
- Does Ben know you're here ?
- How did you get in ?
- There's a key, under the mat.
[911 on line, what do you...]
- Oh no, no, no. Wait, wait, wait.
I'm Ben's boyfriend.
He left a note... in there.
I'm just waiting.
He went out to get dinner.
Hi.
I'm sorry I startled you.
I''m Caleb.
- [Hello, hello]
- Hi.
- [Hello... sir...]
- I'm Ben's husband
- [Are you all right ? Hello ?
Are you are you still there ?
Sir !?]
- Four months.
- Two and a half years.
- Shit...
- Yep.
- So I...
Yes, you live here ?
- Yes.
- Oh, that...
that's why you have...
the keys.
- That is why I have... the keys.
Yes.
- I'm not in love with him.
I mean it was, it was headed there,
but... not...
... takes me a while...
- Where's the note ?
- In the kitchen.
- I was supposed to be in Stockholm.
Did he tell you I was a pilot ?
- I... hmm...
He never mentioned you.
- It's a surprise,
two extra days off.
- Hmm... Should I go ?
I... I should... probably go.
- I was just about to ask if I should...
- No. I, I... I should go.
I mean, please. You have... hmm...
sen... seniority.
Ehm...
Hmm... I'm sorry. That came out weird.
I'm nervous.
- Where did you meet ?
- Grindr.
- Ah... !
Yes
- Why not ?
Well, isn't that where everyone meets ?
- We met at Kagosha.
It's a gallery.
- Art ?
- Yes.
- I... hmm...
I didn't know Ben was into art
- He's not really.
- Did you text him ?
- No.
No. He's picking up dinner,
Tandoori probably, eh !
Maybe it's not his favorite.
- Hmm... I can text him.
- What would you even say ?
- I don't know,
maybe calling him an asshole
would be a good place to start.
- Do you want him still ?
- Don't be weird.
- Ugh... !
Aaahhh...
When he gets here,
I'm gonna pick up this paperweight.
He got it in Mexico City
as a present for me,
but I've always hated it.
I mean who buys this ?
What kind of Indiana
farm boy tourist are you ?
I'm gonna break it across his skull
and watch his brain spill out
and his blood
splatter across the wall
that we painted last spring.
Weird enough for you ?
Thirsty ?
Hmm...
Have you met his mother ?
- Ugh...
I haven't met any of his friends.
It's been...
dinners, movies, concerts,
casual
- And fucking.
It's okay.
- Yes.
- He does have a nice dick, doesn't he ?
- Hmm... I'm gonna go.
- Sorry.
- No really, you, you're upset.
- Leaving won't fix that.
Staying won't either.
Do whatever you wanna do.
Oh, his mother
is third generation's bane on New Jersey
answers the door in
her house coat,
feeds the cat off her
plate the whole dine
Edna Turnblad
He's embarrassed,
but she's fabulous in a horrible trashy way.
If she were a drag queen,
she'd win a Guggenheim.
- What do you want from me ?
- I want you to...
disappear ?
And to never have existed.
Too late, uh...
So...
I'll settle for you staying with me
in my living room,
waiting
to confront the bastard when he...
shows up with dinner
for two.
I wonder who he'll pick ?
- Tse...
he's yours.
- You're adorable
like it's easy,
you're cuter than I am.
You're like
closeted movie star hot.
- You're handsome too
and smart.
- Can you kiss ?
It's, ehmm...
his secret ?
Kryptonite
Pretty boys are like...
subway rats in this town,
everywhere. But...
a good kisser,
that's rare,
rarer than diamonds.
- I mean, I do okay.
- Four months ?
You have to do better than okay.
Do you want to kiss me ?
- Yes.
No.
- Me too.
Show me.
Pull the trigger.
Consent is given.
Go.
[Music]
- He's yours if you want him
- He'll be back any minute.
- I can't, I can't. Not right now, hmm...
I need air.
I need a bartender
to pour me a drink,
I need to... uhh...
I need to kiss like you kiss.
- Well, I'm not staying here either.
Fuck that !
- Don't you want him ?
- Hmm... I...
I'm not someone's weekend bitch.
It's not what I want.
Where are you going
for that drink again ?
- There's a hole in the wall
around the corner.
[Music till the end]