The Little Death (2014) Movie Script
- It tickles.
- Want me to stop?
Yeah, can you just come up
here and fuck me, please?
OK.
No, no, no.
Not right after. Come on.
- Oh, I'm sorry, I won't.
- Don't you dare!
Take this off.
I brushed my teeth, I brushed
my teeth, I brushed my... Mmm.
- Have you set the alarm?
- Mm-hm.
- Paul?
-Hm?
- Can we talk for a sec?
- Of course, honey. What?
I want to tell you something
but I'm embarrassed.
Say it.
Well, I need you... I need you
not to judge me. OK?
It's important
that you don't judge me.
- Promise me you won't.
- Hey, sweetheart, what?
I want you to rape me.
- That's it?
- Yes.
That's what you were
embarrassed about?
Yes.
- OK.
- Really?
Of course.
You're a ten, babe.
You're a fucking
ten out of ten.
You're 20 out of ten. To me.
You're five stars.
Yeah? Come here.
Feel better?
Uh... No. Paul.
Honey, not...
Not 'rate' me.
Rape me.
- What?
- I want you to rape me.
- You want what?
- You to rape me.
- You want me to rape you?
- Yes.
- What are you talking about?
- It's a fantasy of mine.
What, getting raped?
Yeah, it's like
your foot thing.
Um, it's a bit different,
I think, hon.
- How?
" How?
How is sucking your toes
different from me raping you?
Oh, come on,
you know what I mean.
It's something
I've always wanted to try.
I just thought it might be
a nice thing
for us to talk about.
- You know, just to be honest.
- Yeah.
- I'm going to...
No? What?
- Not now, not now.
- No? When?
- Um, I don't want to know.
- OK, tomorrow, or...?
No, no, I don't want to know,
Paul.
I'm working late on Friday
if you want
to knock it on the head...
You're not listening.
I don't want to know.
I don't want to know when.
I don't want to know where.
I don't even want to know...
for sure...
- Yeah?
- ..that it's you.
Right.
Yeah, I don't know
how to take that, babe.
Honey, it's a
really common fantasy.
Yeah, I'm not 100% sure
it is, hon.
It is actually and you said
you wouldn't judge me.
No, I didn't.
I absolutely did not.
How did you expect I'd react,
Maeve?
You just told me
you had a fantasy
that doesn't involve me!
No, what? Yes, it does!
You said you want to be raped
but not by me.
No! Oh, no, no, no, darling,
that's not what I meant.
Oh, my God,
you are so fucking beautiful.
No, I want to be raped by you.
No, you don't.
Yes, you are the only man in
the world I want to rape me.
I love you
but because I love you
and because you're the only
man I want to be with,
I want you to have sex
with me.
Oh, Pauly, I adore you.
I just want for one little
second, like, to fear
what might be like
if it was somebody else.
- Does that make sense?
- Not really.
OK, go to sleep, we'll talk
about it another time.
Blowjobs.
- That's good, Daniel.
- It's Dan.
Forgive me, that's good, Dan.
Let's explore blowjobs.
There is no wrong way.
- Her blowjobs...
- Say it... to Evie.
Your blowjobs...
...aren't... very...
good.
They're not...
They're not that bad.
They are.
Well, you remember the last
time you went down on me, Dan?
- 'Cause I don't.
- OK. OK.
- Regularity's not the issue.
- Let's just... take a breath.
When was the last time
you had sex?
- Um...
- Like, um...
- It was, um, it was...
It was last month
before your fun run.
Was it?
OK. What seems to be missing
here is communication.
But you're both struggling
with that.
So as an experiment tonight...
...don't be Evie and Dan.
Instead,
be two different people
who aren't afraid to say
what they want.
Are you familiar
with role play?
Miss Redding,
sorry to keep you waiting.
- What? Why are you laughing?
- I'm sorry.
- Why is this funny?
- I'm sorry, I wasn't ready.
- Just do it again.
- Seriously?
- Go, sorry, I wasn't ready.
- Evie, don't laugh 'cause...
- You'll wreck it.
- Sorry.
Miss Redding.
Detective.
I'm going to need to ask you
a few questions,
if that's alright.
- Depends.
- On what?
On whether you're the good cop
or the bad cop.
- Which one are ya?
- Guess.
Good cop.
Guess again.
I said, guess again.
Now, Miss Redding,
are you going to cooperate?
Fuck me.
But they're watching us
behind the mirror.
Don't care. Fuck me.
- That was amazing.
- Yeah.
- You were amazing.
- So were you, E.
- Where did that come from?
- I don't know.
- You really became that guy.
- Detective Dan.
- So strong and believable.
- Really?
Yeah.
I mean it, Dan, maybe
you should have been an actor.
You have the right
to remain silent.
Everything you say... You have
the right to remain silent.
Anything you say
will be taken down
in a court of law.
You can't.
Yeah, I can. No, you can't.
Yeah, I just did it.
- Honey, you still awake?
-Yeah...
I really like
the role play thing.
Yeah, me too.
I definitely think we should
do it again sometime.
Hm.
Richard?
Richard.
Hey. I'm about to come, quick.
Quick, quick, quick.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- Yeah.
Oh, oh... Yes.
Yes.
You know
I'm not ovulating now, right?
Yeah, yeah, I just thought
it'd be a shame to waste it,
you know, just in case.
Oh, God.
- That was good timing.
- Hmm.
How was your day?
- Good. Fine. Boring.
- Yeah?
- How was yours?
- Same. Same.
- You smell good.
- Mm.
- Cup of tea?
- Yeah, thanks, hon.
Oop. Yep-
Earl Grey or Russian Caravan?
Earl Grey.
It's the same every time.
Two days before I start
ovulating, twice a day,
morning and night
in the recommended position.
And for 20 minutes afterwards,
I elevate my hips.
And it's been like that
for almost three years now
so you can't tell me that
there isn't something wrong.
There isn't something wrong.
Sometimes it just comes
down to bad luck.
Will you please just tell us
what to do?
'Cause I'll try anything.
Do you climax at the point
of ejaculation?
Mutual orgasms are said
to increase
the chances of conception.
So do you orgasm during sex?
Yeah, I mean, I have. Yeah.
While you've been trying
to conceive?
Oh, no, not since
I've been married.
How's your cervical mucus? OK?
It's good. Yeah.
Good.
And what about the doctor?
Did she say anything or...?
Actually, she, uh,
she did say one thing.
- Yeah?
- Um...
Yeah. She said that it might
help if I orgasm during sex.
You orgasm during sex
all the time.
Yeah, so...
Yeah, we just... We, uh,
keep doing what we're doing.
- Yeah.
- Knuckle down.
Hey.
If having a baby was easy,
everyone would be doing it.
I think everyone is doing it.
Yeah, but their babies suck.
Ours is going to be awesome.
- We'll be right.
I should get that.
That'll be work.
RICHARD: Hello.
You want to go outside?
Babe. What's wrong, honey?
My dad's dead.
Oh, my God.
He, uh... had a...
had a heart attack.
No.
I've never
seen you cry before.
MAN: Whoa, whoa, whoa...
Hey, the place looks great.
I am so jealous.
- Thank you.
- Well, slowly but surely...
Only one thing left to do now,
Paul.
- Yael.
- What do you mean?
I think she means marriage,
mate.
- Oh, right,
- What, it's been five years?
BOTH: Six.
- Six?
- Yeah.
- So what are you waiting for?
- OK, that's enough.
- No, it's OK, it's fine.
Uh, no, it's, like, we're not
really waiting for anything.
We're just not really marriage
kind of people, that's all.
Yeah.
What? We've talked about this.
- I know.
- We laughed about it.
We said we didn't need to go
through all that.
Yeah, I know. I know.
Um, should we do dessert?
- Yes, please!
- Let's do that.
- Great.
- Thank you.
Thanks, darling.
- You OK?
- Hmm.
- You seem a little bit...
- I'm fine, I'm fine.
Hey, can I ask you something?
Have you ever...
Have you ever raped anybody?
No. Who's been saying that?
- No-one, no, it's...
- Have you?
No.
No, I haven't and that's the
thing. I don't really want to.
Mate, that's good.
That's good.
- You don't have to.
- No.
Mate, I'm not...
No, it's not that, it's...
It's not me, it's...
It's Maeve.
She's got this, uh...
What?
I don't even know
what you call it.
- That thing, this, uh...
- Oh. Like a fantasy?
Yeah. A fantasy.
How did you know that?
OK.
Rape fantasy - very common.
No shit. That's what she said.
Yeah. Yael's got one.
Massive one.
- Really? And you've never...?
- No, can't be done.
I've tried but
it's a flawed fantasy.
- Not possible.
- Why?
Well, think about it.
The moment someone asks to
be raped, it stops being rape.
Right? It's only rape
if they don't want it.
- She wants it - not rape.
- Right.
The reason they can't get
what they want
is because they want it.
God, that doesn't seem fair.
Sucks, mate.
There's got to be something
I can do.
I just want to make her happy.
Whatever happened
to good, old-fashioned...
...run-of-the-mill sex?
- Yeah.
People have to complicate it
with all this kinky shit.
Yeah.
You don't have anything
like that, do ya?
- Hm?
- No weird fetish?
Nah. I mean, define 'weird',
you know.
Hi.
- Hi! Hi, sorry to bother you.
- That's OK.
Uh, were you in the middle
of something?
Oh, no, we're just having
some lunch. It's alright.
- Oh, I'm so sorry.
- That's fine.
I'll be quick.
Um, my name's Steve.
I've just moved in
down the road.
- Oh, we've just moved in too.
- Hey, how about that!
- Hello, welcome.
- Thank you.
Well, as I said,
I won't keep you.
- I'm doing the rounds.
- Nice.
- Visiting the neighbours.
- Good.
And I wanted
to give you these.
- Aww...
- My Way of saying hi.
Oh, my God. Golliwogs.
Also, I am required
by federal law to inform you
that I am a convicted
sex offender.
Where did you find Golliwogs?
I didn't think
they made them anymore.
- No, they don't, I do.
- Oh!
Yeah, baking
is my little hobby.
Amazing. I haven't seen these
since I was a kid.
I think they stopped
making them
on account of
the, you know, racism.
- Yeah, makes you think.
- Yeah, it does.
OK, well, I won't keep you
any longer.
- OK, thanks, Dan.
- Steve.
Steve! Sorry. Maeve.
Nice to meet you.
- Nice to meet you too.
- Thanks so much for this.
- Bye-bye.
- Thank you, bye.
Please be kidding,
- What are you doing?
- Nothing.
Well, could you brush
your teeth
if you're going to breathe
into my face like that?
I don't want to be
the bad guy here, Phil.
But you can't keep
falling asleep at work.
I mean,
you're dropping the ball.
So that's a penalty,
that's one strike.
I'm sorry,
it won't happen again.
- Alright, off you...
- I'm tired.
I didn't get that raise
that...
I told you why I couldn't
give you the raise...
...home life got
a little bit...
...times are tight,
money's tight.
I mean, we're all feeling
the pinch.
- I'm cancelling my holiday.
- Really?
- Shortening it, yeah.
- OK, I'm sorry.
It won't happen again.
Have you ever been
to Thailand?
You've never been, have you?
Remember I did my shoulder
in Bangkok?
The doctor put me on these.
Right?
These little suckers
will knock you out
a good six, eight hours.
OK, I'm not kidding
but be careful.
They're from Thailand
so they're not technically,
you know, legal.
I'm not great with pills.
I've got a really sensitive
gag reflex.
I almost choked on them
at a school camp when...
So I'll just...
I'll put them in some tea.
There you go.
Those'll do the trick.
That's the same stuff
they force-feed prisoners
when they riot.
So you want to sleep?
You're gonna sleep.
Oh... Come on, guys!
- Oi!
BOY: We were just...
You were just nothing.
Bedtime.
Monsters.
Hey.
Hey.
Hey!
Wow.
- Dad.
Uh, what are you doing up?
Off to bed, the pair of ya.
Don't make me come up there.
Good morning.
- How are you feeling?
- Fine.
Feeling better, actually.
Good. That's good.
I may be
a little late tonight.
Not too late, OK?
No? Why?
I don't know, I just thought
that we could...
What?
I don't know.
- You don't know?
- No.
You really don't know?
- I said I don't know.
- Right.
- Just not too late, OK?
- I won't be too late.
Oh, God, I am so sorry.
No, I'm sorry,
it's totally my fault.
Uh...
Golliwogs?
- Why do you have Golliwogs?
- Well, it's why I'm here.
I've just moved in
down the road.
And I thought I'd just pop in
and introduce myself.
- I'm Steve.
- Uh, Phil.
Pleasure to meet you, Phil.
Those are my little 'Howdy,
neighbour' gifts... for you.
God, this takes me back.
A simpler time.
It really was.
Also, I'm required
by federal law to inform you
that I am a convicted
sex offender.
This is so nice of you.
Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah.
Baby, you're not crying.
I don't think I have
any tears left in me.
I'm sure there's a few more
in there.
I mean, your dad
only just died.
Ooh. Baby, shush.
Sorry to keep you waiting,
Mrs Hawkins.
Actually, doctor, it's 'Miss'.
Well, Miss Hawkins,
why don't you take a seat?
You look very sexy
in that outfit, doctor.
Now, Miss Hawkins, I have
the results of your test here.
Oh, yes. Will you need
to examine me further?
Uh, no, no, it's conclusive.
And I'm afraid it's bad news.
Well, I have been
a very bad girl.
- Perhaps you need to...
- You have hepatitis.
- Sorry, what?
- Hepatitis.
Well, that's not very sexy,
is it?
No, no, it's not.
Particularly not hepatitis C.
So, I'm going to prescribe you
a course of interferon
and I'll give you the number
of a support group
in the area.
And I'll see you again
in a couple of weeks.
- Sorry, Dan, I'm confused...
- Dan?
It's 'Doctor'! Stay in it!
Now we have to start again.
No, no, we don't have
to start again.
- Just getting good too!
- How was it getting good?
Why do I have hepatitis?
Because I thought that your
character was, you know,
like, maybe got around a bit.
You know, a bit slutty.
I thought that would be sexy.
I'm not gonna want to have sex
if you've just diagnosed me
with an STD.
Just... Just make me
feel sexy.
Alright, alright, alright.
Do it again. I promise
I'll make you feel sexy, OK?
Um, go back to your spot.
I'll start here and...
- You alright?
- Just feel a bit hot.
Oh, is this part of the...?
We started?
Miss Hawkins,
I need to speak...
- Baby, you OK?
Hey. Hey, what's the matter?
Hey, you're right.
You're right.
Good thing I'm a doctor, eh?
Hello.
Nice of you to show up.
I had car trouble,
I'm so sorry.
- Ah!
- Oh, ah, sorry.
- Shh.
You're not fighting. You know.
- Keep going. Just keep going.
- How do you know?
No, no, baby. Your smell.
Just keep going.
Shit.
- My smell.
- Just keep going.
I even got these clothes
from a second-hand store.
It's still good, baby,
keep going.
- No.
- Yes, yes, yes.
No, I fucked it. I'm sorry.
Oh, come here.
- For a second, though?
- Yeah, definitely.
Yeah? I'm sorry
about the groceries.
- It's OK.
- I heard something crack.
- Eggs.
- Shit.
- The eggs?
- Yeah, it's OK.
- Really? I'll get more eggs.
- Shh.
- I'm sorry.
- Shh.
It's OK.
- Hey!
- Hey.
- Are you still working?
- Yeah.
I'm just cleaning stuff out.
It's good, actually. It's
keeping my mind off things.
You need to take a break,
baby.
You want to watch a movie
or something?
- Um... yeah, sure.
- Yeah?
I thought we could watch one
in bed?
- Alright.
- Alright.
Actually, I picked up a couple
on my way home.
What have I got?
I have got Sophie's Choice
or Philadelphia.
Any comedies?
Might be a bit heavy for me,
hon.
Oh.
Well, maybe later?
Will you come and help me
make some dinner?
Yeah, yeah, just give me
a couple of minutes.
Alright, well, I'll leave
the onions on the bench
for you to cut, OK?
Just... Onions again?
Jesus, R0, no of fence,
I'm a bit onioned out.
I feel like
we've been eating onions
every night
for the past week.
OK, alright.
OK.
- How was your day?
- It was good.
It was exhausting but good.
Oh, that's nice.
So you haven't been thinking
about your dad at all?
Well, I am now.
Why did you bring up Dad?
Well, you just haven't spoken
about him in a few days.
You must miss him.
I'm just trying not to think
about it.
Can we just talk about
something else?
Hey, you remember
when he used to leave
those ridiculously long
messages on your phone
and you wouldn't even finish
listening to them?
You'd just delete them.
You ever think about that
and wish you hadn't done that?
God...
Hey. Hey, heY-
Honey. Hey, what's wrong?
Look at me.
I just miss him so much.
Hey, it's alright, sweetheart.
It's OK.
I've got you, honey,
I've got you.
Hey, what... Are you serious?
What, I thought you wanted...
What, I wanted a handjob while
I thought about my dead dad?
No. Thanks.
Hello, girl.
You're my good girl,
aren't you?
My best girl.
I love you. I love you.
OK.
You ready for a little trip?
Just one night. I'll pick her
up again tomorrow afternoon.
- I don't know, R0.
- One night. That is all.
- Why?
- I want to take Richard out.
As a surprise and I don't want
him worrying about the dog.
You know what he's like.
- Why are you lying?
- What? I am not.
Yes, you are lying.
Your knee is twitching.
I have known you
my entire life
and you cannot tell a lie
without your knee twitching.
What's going on? R0!
Look, will you take her
or not?
Yeah, alright,
I'll take her but...
I gotta run.
I'll pick her up tomorrow.
Run away?!
How did she run away?
- L-l don't know, sweet...
- How did she get out?
L-I came home and
the side gate was open.
Why was the side gate open,
R0?
- I don't know, sweetheart.
- Jesus!
Oh, my God, you must be
feeling so emotional.
Come on, baby, come here.
It's alright.
I know how much
she meant to you.
Meant to me?! Don't say
'meant'! 'Means' to me!
Call me if she shows up!
- Miss Wickam, I beg of you!
- Mr Callum, hold your tongue.
I'm to be wed within the week.
You love him not.
If you walk away from me now,
you'll be making the biggest
mistake of my life.
I feel faint.
I used to be scared
of the idea of growing old.
Now I'm just scared
of the idea
of growing old without you.
- Baby...
- Shh.
What are you doing?
I was watching that.
No, wait,
I need to talk to you.
OK, talk to me but
can you turn the TV back on?
- No, this is important.
- What is it?
- I love you.
- How is that important?
- Give me the remote.
- No, no, wait. Listen to me.
I'm in this.
You and me, all the way.
- Are you?
- Yeah, of course.
Are you?
I mean, what if... what if
we were to take things
to the next level?
Oh, we are so
on the same page, it's scary.
Where are you going?
Is this next level enough
for you?
I need to tell you something.
Wait, wait, wait,
let me enter into it.
No, Dan, I'm not
doing this anymore, OK?
You're giving me really mixed
messages here, Evie.
I just want to tell you
something.
Well, tell me, tell me!
Just stop playing games!
- Tell me!
- Dan, I'm...
- No, leave it.
- Could be important.
I can promise you
it is not as important
as what I'm about to tell you.
I'm sorry, it's going to
annoy the shit out of me.
- Don't you dare.
- Don't I dare?
Calm down,
I'll be two seconds.
I'm asking you,
your wife is asking you
to not answer the door.
Yeah?
- Bad time?
- Uh, I don't know, maybe.
- Depends what you want.
- Good point.
My name's Steve. I've just
moved in down the street.
OK.
Just wanted
to introduce myself
and say hi to the neighbours,
that's all.
Uh, OK, yeah, in that case, it
is kind of a bad time, mate.
- Sorry.
- Yeah, of course.
I see you've
got your hands full.
Uh, look, I just wanted
to give you these
and I'll get out of your hair.
Thanks.
- They're Golliwogs.
- Yeah. Thanks.
Bet you haven't seen those
for a while.
Um, no. Suppose not.
- Uh, is that it?
- Uh... yeah.
Actually,
there is one more thing.
Yep?
I am required by federal law
to inform you
that I am a convicted
sex offender.
Yeah, that's fine.
Anything else?
No. That's everything.
OK!
Evie!
Evie, open the door.
Evie, don't do this.
Evie!
Honey, what are you doing?
Go to sleep.
No, I can't, I have to
finish these posters.
D'you think you'll be able
to put them up
around the streets tomorrow?
- Yeah, of course, honey.
- Thanks.
- I'm sorry.
- Baby, don't apologise.
It's not your fault.
I bet you anything that
when you get home tomorrow,
Roxy'll be here
waiting for you.
Run away?!
W-What do you mean?
How is that even possible?
Well, I think maybe she went
out the side gate
'cause the latch is broken.
- Why is the latch broken?
- It's a long story.
I'm so sorry, R0.
I-l didn't...
OK, you can never tell Richard
about this. I mean it.
What?
You can never tell him
that Roxy was here.
He will never forgive me.
Or you.
- R0...
- You gotta promise me.
- R0!
- No, promise me!
I promise, what is going on?
Oh, my God.
- Did you find Roxy?
- Not yet.
But we will. We will.
Hmm, the posters should help,
don't you think?
Definitely. Someone
will see those posters
and they'll call.
Yeah. So you put
all the posters up or...?
- Of course.
- Of course.
- Yeah.
- Hmm, that's weird.
What?
I was putting out the garbage
earlier today
and the bottom of the bag
split open.
- Oh.
- And I found these.
What the fuck, R0?
- I must have accidentally...
- Oh, must you?
That's bullshit
because you just told me
that you put up
all the posters.
Yeah, but what I meant was...
- Where's Roxy?
- I don't know.
Don't you?
Why are You lyin9 t0 me?
Why would you hurt me
like that?
I mean, do you not
want to find Roxy?
I did not hurt Roxy!
Who said anything
about you hurting Roxy?
- I didn't mean...
- What did you do to her?
If it was an accident,
just tell me. I'll understand!
- Did you kill her?
- What? No!
I did not kill the dog!
Can we help you?
I'll come back another time.
Just tell me,
what has happened?
Richard, I swear to you.
The last time I saw Roxy,
she was fine.
But there's something,
isn't there?
I know you, R0, I can see it.
There's something wrong
with me.
Um... I wanted to tell you
as soon as I felt it
and I should have but I...
I am sick, Richard.
- I'm so sick.
- Sick?
What do you mean, sick?
Sick, how?
God, I'm so afraid
to tell you.
It's not...
It's not cancer, is it?
- Baby, it's...
- It's not... cancer, is it?
It could be...
a bit of cancer, yeah.
Oh, God...
What does that mean -
'could be'?
Well, the doctor says
that the results are...
They're inconclusive.
Wait, wait, wait,
I'm confused.
It's OK, it's alright.
I've got you.
- Hey, let it out.
- No, no, no. I've got you.
- I'll be strong for you.
- Not too strong. Hey?
Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah!
Oh, my God!
Ah! Ah!
Ah! Ah! Ah!
- Just me!
Will you shut up?
The boys are asleep.
Oh, I know,
I-I'm sorry I'm late.
- I can explain...
- Stop fucking mumbling, Phil.
'Not too late.' Do you
remember saying that?
Yeah, I do remember
but I wanted to get...
I don't care.
Your dinner's in the fridge.
Want a cuppa?
If I find you sleeping
in this building again,
that's it, you're done.
Oh, will you just stop
mumbling?! I do not...
Oh...
Don't bother, mate.
Strike three.
My office.
Why don't we reschedule?
Fucking what?
Hey, honey bee!
I got a little surprise
for you today!
Hello?
What's with
the silent treatment?
Oh, Evie, talk to me.
Do you remember
what our counsellor said
about communication?
Yes, I remember
what our counsellor said
about communication.
I remember everything
our counsellor said
including the date and time of
the next fucking appointment.
Did you, Daniel? No.
Don't call me Daniel, Evelyn.
Daniel. Da-niel. Daniel,
Daniel, fucking Daniel.
Honey bee, honey bee,
I am sorry. I am so sorry.
I'm a shithead,
I completely forgot.
- Won't happen again, alright?
- Yeah, well, better not.
Got a present for you today.
Really?
- It's a video camera.
- It's for our role plays.
I thought we could tape
and watch it back.
- Dan.
- Don't you reckon?
- How much was it?
- Oh, no, it's nothing.
Couple of hundred bucks.
We should really be saving
right now.
No, no, we're fine.
Do you want to try it out?
I have costumes
and I've set up a little
something in the garage.
Let me get the light
and, uh, let me see,
press that there.
Evie, you look amazing.
This is so exciting.
- Uh, you ready?
- Yep.
And... action.
Um...
I hear you've been
misbehaving, prisoner.
Um... I always fall
for the bad boys.
What are you in here for,
stud?
Assault. Sexual assault.
I'll bet
she secretly loved it.
He.
- For fuck's sake, Dan!
- What?
You're trying to turn me on
by telling me
you have sexually assaulted
a man?!
It's called having
a back story, Evie.
- Something's burning.
Oh, shit. It's the light. Get
the door! Get the door, Evie!
- I am!
- Bloody thing.
We're fine! We're fine!
Everything's fine!
Close the door, Evie! Close
the door! Close the door!
No! Oh, fuck, Evie!
This cost $3,000!
Thank God it's working.
OK, let's go from the top.
- The top of what?
- The scene.
What scene? Dan, do you even
remember why we're doing this?
- For the sex.
- For the marriage.
You're really starting to
scare me. Look at yourself.
Don't even recognise you
anymore.
Babe, babe! Warden! Warden!
Perhaps we can have
a bit of fun before you go.
Hey.
- Where have you been?
- What do you mean? Work.
Well, I called your work
and they said that
you left hours ago.
- So where have you been?
- Just been in the car.
Don't you dare fucking mumble.
I've been in the car!
Honestly, I've just been
driving around, thinking.
Why weren't you at work?
Maureen, there's been
a bit of a reshuffle at work.
It's nothing I did.
Are you cheating on me, Phil?
What?
$500 on women's clothes.
$70 at The Body Shop.
- Interflora, David Jones...
- Show me that.
Fuck you!
We have a joint bank account,
you idiot.
- I can explain.
- Yes. Yes, this time explain.
I can... First of all,
I never did anything...
It's so complicated...
You're not going to
understand.
OK.
Yeah, I've been having
an affair.
It's over and
it will never happen again.
- Who is she?
- Someone from work.
- You don't know her.
- What's her name?
- Does it matter?
- What is she like?
- Don't do this.
- Is she younger than me?
- She's about the same.
- Prettier?
- Again, about the same.
- Is she thinner than me?
You have a lot in common.
She's not younger than me.
She's not skinnier than me.
She's not prettier than me.
Why couldn't it just be me?
Because she's softer than you.
She's quieter than you.
She doesn't yell at me.
She doesn't call me an idiot
or tell me to shut up
all the time.
She listens to me.
She's nice to me.
She doesn't make me feel like
the only thing stopping her
from being happy... is me.
Get out.
- Maureen.
- Get out, Phil.
Fuck it. Fuck.
At the tone,
record your message.
To end, press 'hash'.
PHIL: Maureen, pick up.
It's not another woman,
it's only ever been you.
I don't want anyone...
Oh, shit!
if you are satisfied
with your message, press 1.
To re-record your message,
press 2.
For more options, press 3.
- D'you make a wish?
- Yeah.
Yeah?
Are you gonna tell me
what it is?
No.
If I guess, will you tell me?
- Maybe.
- Maybe?
OK, is it a... car?
- No, it's not a car.
- OK, not a car.
Is it bigger or smaller
than a car'?
- I'm not telling.
- Alright.
Is it bigger or smaller
than... I don't know,
top of my head, say, this?
Oh, my God, if that is car
keys, I'm going to kill you.
- Paul.
- I'm not saying anything.
- No, this is not OK.
- Just open it.
Oh, wow.
- They're really beautiful.
- Yeah?
Yeah.
- Happy birthday.
- Thank you.
- Oh, what?
- No, I'm OK. I'm OK.
- Seriously?
- Yeah, I promise you.
Otherwise, we need to have
a little nap.
A nap? In the car?
While I drive?
Can you spare a dollar, mate?
No, sorry, mate,
we don't have any.
That's right,
you remember it.
Come on, man, just a dollar.
Mate, we honestly don't
have anything. I'm sorry.
Not one single dollar?
OK, you should just give them
what you've got.
- Alright.
- He doesn't have anything.
- For fuck's sake.
- That's what he said.
Alright, mate.
- Alright, that's fine.
- OK.
What?
Alright, you want phones?
They're yours.
There you go.
Oh, come on, mate.
That's enough.
You got what you wanted.
I wouldn't say that.
Aren't you
a pretty little thing?
- Alright, fuck off.
- What are you doing?
Sorry, sir, there's been
a gas leak in the garage.
- I can't let you through.
- A gas leak?
Hmm.
Paul! Paul!
Paul! Where are you...?
Is he OK?
Hey.
Hey, sweetheart.
- Where are we?
- We're in the hospital.
- Shit, are you OK?
- Am I OK?
Yeah, I'm OK. You're not OK.
You fractured your skull,
honey.
But you're going to be fine.
Oh, my God. How?
You fell and hit your head.
Really? I don't remember.
Yeah, the doctor said
you might not.
- It's OK, just rest.
- What happened?
Somebody hit you.
The car park.
Yeah. In the car park.
Did I rape you?
Shh.
That's what I was trying
to do, sweetheart.
- Shh.
- Those men, I paid them.
- I know.
- They were actors.
They were meant to hit me
with a fake bottle.
- Yeah.
- Did they use a real bottle?
- L-l don't...
- It should have been fake.
Honey, just try and rest.
Just try and relax.
- It was for your birthday.
- I know.
- As a surprise.
- I know.
Did I do it?
Maeve, tell me.
Did I rape you?
- Yeah. Baby, you raped me.
- Yeah?
Was it OK?
Yeah.
Was it what you wanted?
- Yeah.
- Thank God.
I really tried to think
of everything this time.
You know, I really put
some thought into it.
- I know.
- Yeah.
I practised.
But, you know, it was
my first rape and I...
I don't know if I'm, like,
meant to be a raper.
- Shh...
- 'Cause it was...
No, baby, it was perfect.
It was perfect.
Wait, so when
did I hit my head?
- Right after.
- Shit.
- There was more.
- No.
- There was more...
- No more, no.
I was meant to do
one more thing.
Pauly, no more, please.
Honey, no, that's enough.
Just one more thing.
Where are my clothes?
Please, just get my clothes.
MY leans.
The front pocket of my jeans.
Yeah.
You don't have to answer now.
I will be at Mum's until
you sort out your priorities.
You're my priority!
Done! Sorted!
Well, it doesn't feel like it.
You never look at me anymore.
You're late home
every night...
I'm under the pump at work,
babe.
That is bullshit. Bullshit!
I called your brother
and he told me
you've been taking
theatre lessons.
Theatre... Screen acting
classes. So what?
So what the fuck? Since when
did you want to be an actor'?
You're the one who said
I should get into it.
- What? When?
- Oh, God!
When we first started
this whole role play thing.
You said I could be
a famous actor. Your words.
That does not sound like
something I would say.
And that is not the point.
The point is you lied
about it.
I was embarrassed.
I mean, Jesus, Evie!
Me? An actor?
- It's crazy.
- It's ridiculous.
It's not ridiculous.
Dan. It's ridiculous.
Don't go. Evie.
Don't go.
If you walk out that door,
you'll be making the biggest
mistake of my life.
I used to be scared
of the idea of growing old.
Now I'm just scared
of the idea...
...of growing old without you.
- Ow. Fuck!
- What?
Oh, I got it in my eye.
Christ!
- Got what in your eye?
- Tiger Balm.
I got fucking Tiger Balm in my
eye. God, that really stings.
How did you get Tiger Balm
in your eye?
You're supposed to put it
near your eye.
Like, the bridge of your nose
and it makes you cry.
They showed us how to do it
in acting class this week.
You were acting?
Yeah, you couldn't tell,
though, right?
You are a psychopath.
You're not... you're not
even ready to be a husband,
let alone a...
Let alone a what?
Evie.
Let alone a what?
An actor?
You're not a fucking actor.
Wow.
What happened to you?
Where's Dan?
'Where's Dan? Where's Dan?'
Fuck Dan!
Dan is boring. He's pathetic.
Why do you keep going
on about Dan?
I can be better
than Dan, Evie.
I'm done with Dan.
Yeah.
Me too.
DOCTOR: OK, so I will see you
next time?
Have a good day.
Richard, come on in.
What's bothering you?
Um, well, I just wanted to
talk to you about Rowena.
- Where are you going?
- Uh, I don't know.
I just can't be here
right now.
Why?
I saw Dr Barnes today.
She said she hasn't seen you
in weeks.
- And you don't have cancer.
- I don't have cancer.
What the fuck is going on?
Well, I just came
from the doctor
and the results came back
and they are negative.
I don't have cancer.
We beat it.
No, it's bullshit.
Dr Barnes said she hasn't
seen you in weeks.
I never said
I went to Dr Barnes.
Yes, you did.
You said Dr Barnes.
Well, honey, if I said that,
I'm sorry.
I thought I had cancer,
I was a bit confused.
But I don't...
...have it.
- So there's no cancer.
- No.
Are you crying?
Aw...
- Sweetie, are you crying?
- Yes, I'm fucking crying!
- Ow! That hurt!
- Oh, did it? Good!
I hurt you, good!
Because I can't help but feel
that for the last few weeks,
you've been hurting me. Like,
deliberately or something.
- That is so crazy!
- Is it?
Then how come you keep putting
photos of my dad up
all around the house?
I put a couple up,
I don't keep putting...
But you do! This is
what I'm talking about!
You're not putting photos up,
except you are.
Y-You didn't throw those
posters out, except you did.
But only because you have
cancer, except you don't!
I can't trust you anymore, R0!
I still don't know where
Roxy is. My dad's dead.
I'm crying
all the fucking time.
I'm so dehydrated
and I can't help but feel
that you are somehow...
you're behind it all!
OK, firstly,
I did not kill your dad.
Boy, do I keep
picking the wrong times.
So sorry.
Richard, can you just...?
Wait, Richard!
Please, can you just stop
and talk to me?
- Honey, please don't go.
- Why?
Are you gonna actually tell me
what's going on?
Like, look in my eyes and
actually tell me the truth?
No, of course not.
All I ever wanted
was to have a family with you.
And now...
...shit, I'm almost glad
I couldn't get you pregnant.
I am pregnant.
What?
- Please come here.
- No, what did you say?
Don't fuck with me, R0,
not about this.
- What did you say?
- I said I'm pregnant.
Is that true?
Are you sure?
How can you be sure?
Just, I am, I'm sure.
You're pregnant?
That's what all this
has been about?
Why didn't you tell me?
Scared.
We're gonna have a baby?
We're gonna have a baby?
I thought
it was kicking.
It's just your knee twitching.
- Playing up again?
- Oh, no, it's fine.
It just hums sometimes.
Moni, this service
doesn't work
if the interpreter
is deaf too.
It's not quite
that bad.
- Getting worse, though?
- Please don't tell anybody.
I need this job.
- Thank you.
PHONE:
You've called Phone Fuck.
Which ones of our sluts
do you want?
- I beg your pardon?
- This is Phone Fuck.
Which girl do you want to
speak to, hon?
Can I just put you on hold
for a second?
Hello? Who do you want
to talk to?
Sorry, my name is Monica. I'm
calling from Video Relay...
I don't care, sweetie.
Just tell me
who you want to talk to
and I'll put you through, OK?
Yes, sorry, hold on.
- What are the options?
- Depends what you're into.
What have you got?
Lesbian, straight sex,
domination, blondes,
interracial, deep throat,
chubbies, trannies,
cougars, swingers, Asians,
gang bang,
big tits, small tits,
double penetration,
triple penetration,
squirting, arse to...
...midgets,
barely legal, gonzo,
bukaki, anal, you tell me,
we've got different girls
for different things.
- Straight blonde, please.
- Connecting you now.
Hey, this is Sonya.
Who's this?
Hi, this is Monica
calling from...
You sound really cute, Monica.
I don't normally do girls
but I'm so horny tonight,
I'll make an exception.
No, no, sorry, no. No.
I'm calling from Video Relay.
My name is Monica.
I have a caller on the line
that uses sign language and
I'll be interpreting the call
for both of you tonight.
What?
If you talk to me, I will
sign to the caller who's deaf
and he will sign back to me
and I will talk to you.
He's deaf?
Yes, that's right, he's deaf.
So he can't hear me?
No, he can't hear anything,
he's... deaf.
But he can see your hand signs
of everything I say?
Yes, sign language.
That's right.
I know a couple of words
in sign language.
I know 'cunt face'
and 'sunrise'.
Can he see me?
Like, what I'm doing?
No, nobody can see you.
He can see me. You're just
on a regular phone.
Right, gotcha, gotcha, gotcha.
- What does he look like?
- Um...
He's cute... I guess?
Look, can we just get started,
please?
Sorry,
what was his name again?
It'll be easier if you talk
to me as if I'm him.
What's your name?
- Sam.
- Fuck, that's slow.
Yeah, sorry,
there's going to be a lag.
What are you doing up so late,
Sam?
Just finishing some work. You?
I was waiting for you to call.
MONICA: What are you wearing?
Pink bra and panties.
What are you wearing?
- Just boxer shorts.
- Is he?
No, he's wearing a hoodie...
Why don't we take
those little shorts off?
Sorry, can you hang on
for one second?
Oh, shit.
Am I still holding?
What the fuck?
Oh, my God, yes, I'm so sorry.
Um...
Can you repeat
what you said last?
I said, why don't
you take your shorts off?
Fuckin' hell, man.
- Uh, his shorts are off.
- Are you hard?
Sorry, what do you mean
by that?
Oh, fuck! It's hard to get
a run on here.
- Ask him is his dick's hard.
- Yeah, of course. Um...
Uh, yes, yes, yes.
Sorry, yes, it is.
You want to put your
big, hard cock in my mouth?
Wow, can we just assume
he's gonna say yes to that?
Well, did he say yes?
Uh, I reckon he will
so can we just imagine
he's popped it all in there
and wrap this up?
- Just fucking ask him, mate.
- Wow. Killing me. Um...
Wow. He said yes.
Huh! What a shock.
What do you want me to do now,
lover?
Hello? What does he want me
to do now?
We're having a few technical
difficulties here.
Can I just put you on hold
again?
- Yeah, yeah. Fuckin' hell.
- Thank you.
- Hello, you there?
- Yeah, are you there?
mean, who's the guy?
What the fuck's going on?
Sorry, I'm just going to
backtrack.
Earlier, he said,
please to spit on his penis
to make it all slippery.
- OK.
Tell him I spat on it,
there's spit everywhere,
it's as slippery as fuck.
What's the problem?
He wants to... Oh, my God.
He wants to put his penis
in you... your vagina.
- Mm-hm.
- Your wet vagina.
Mmm, oh, fuck, yeah.
Oh, I'm dripping wet.
Oh, that feels good.
I want your big, hard cock
to fill me up.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, fuck. So deep, it hurts.
You have to eat it, OK?
You can spit it out as much
as you want
but you still have to eat it.
You're just gonna make
yourself dirty and sticky,
Nanna, and then I have
to clean it up.
I'm... I'm so sorry, I'm lost.
What does he have to eat?
Oh, shit! Don't tell him that.
I'm just talking to my nan.
And don't tell him that
either.
Listen, can l...?
I gotta do something.
Could you, um,
could you keep him talking
just for, like, one minute?
- Definitely not.
Can you hear that?
It's my nan, OK?
She's had a stroke.
She's fucked.
I need these calls.
I need the money.
Just for one minute.
It's easier than it looks,
honestly.
Please?
- Fine.
- Thank you, thank you.
OK, great. So just tell him
heaps of stuff
about how good his dick is
and how you want...
Hello? Hello?
Oh, Jesus Christ.
Would you like him
to fuck you hard or slow?
Why would you ask
in the first place?
He would like
to fuck you hard, actually.
SONYA: Hey, I'm back.
- Oh, God!
- Thank you, help me.
- Where are we at?
Uh, you are being fucked
from behind.
- Hard, in the arse, I think?
- Well, that was quick.
I know, that's what I said.
OK, um, can you tell me
what to say next, please?
Tell him it's the biggest dick
I've ever had.
Um, and next?
Does he want to put it
in my mouth?
It's just been in your arse.
So?
OK.
SONYA: What?
What's fucking funny?
This is a fucking prank,
isn't it?
It's really not.
- Um, he wants to hang up.
- Well, did he come?
MAN: Car trouble?
- Yeah.
Can I give you a lift
anywhere?
Um, no, it's fine. Thanks.
- Sure?
- It's fine, I'm sure.
- Thank you.
- Alright. Good luck!
Actually, wait...
Wait, please!
Thank you!
Thanks.
- Thank you.
- No problem. Don't be silly.
Thank you, though.
I really appreciate it.
My pleasure.
I need to get over the bridge,
if that's OK.
- Easy-peasy.
- Thank you.
Um...
Oh, um, actually,
I left the bonnet of
my car open, so I'll just...
No, no, stay there.
I'll get it.
Thanks.
Do you want me to get
anything else from the car?
Captions by CSI Australia
- Want me to stop?
Yeah, can you just come up
here and fuck me, please?
OK.
No, no, no.
Not right after. Come on.
- Oh, I'm sorry, I won't.
- Don't you dare!
Take this off.
I brushed my teeth, I brushed
my teeth, I brushed my... Mmm.
- Have you set the alarm?
- Mm-hm.
- Paul?
-Hm?
- Can we talk for a sec?
- Of course, honey. What?
I want to tell you something
but I'm embarrassed.
Say it.
Well, I need you... I need you
not to judge me. OK?
It's important
that you don't judge me.
- Promise me you won't.
- Hey, sweetheart, what?
I want you to rape me.
- That's it?
- Yes.
That's what you were
embarrassed about?
Yes.
- OK.
- Really?
Of course.
You're a ten, babe.
You're a fucking
ten out of ten.
You're 20 out of ten. To me.
You're five stars.
Yeah? Come here.
Feel better?
Uh... No. Paul.
Honey, not...
Not 'rate' me.
Rape me.
- What?
- I want you to rape me.
- You want what?
- You to rape me.
- You want me to rape you?
- Yes.
- What are you talking about?
- It's a fantasy of mine.
What, getting raped?
Yeah, it's like
your foot thing.
Um, it's a bit different,
I think, hon.
- How?
" How?
How is sucking your toes
different from me raping you?
Oh, come on,
you know what I mean.
It's something
I've always wanted to try.
I just thought it might be
a nice thing
for us to talk about.
- You know, just to be honest.
- Yeah.
- I'm going to...
No? What?
- Not now, not now.
- No? When?
- Um, I don't want to know.
- OK, tomorrow, or...?
No, no, I don't want to know,
Paul.
I'm working late on Friday
if you want
to knock it on the head...
You're not listening.
I don't want to know.
I don't want to know when.
I don't want to know where.
I don't even want to know...
for sure...
- Yeah?
- ..that it's you.
Right.
Yeah, I don't know
how to take that, babe.
Honey, it's a
really common fantasy.
Yeah, I'm not 100% sure
it is, hon.
It is actually and you said
you wouldn't judge me.
No, I didn't.
I absolutely did not.
How did you expect I'd react,
Maeve?
You just told me
you had a fantasy
that doesn't involve me!
No, what? Yes, it does!
You said you want to be raped
but not by me.
No! Oh, no, no, no, darling,
that's not what I meant.
Oh, my God,
you are so fucking beautiful.
No, I want to be raped by you.
No, you don't.
Yes, you are the only man in
the world I want to rape me.
I love you
but because I love you
and because you're the only
man I want to be with,
I want you to have sex
with me.
Oh, Pauly, I adore you.
I just want for one little
second, like, to fear
what might be like
if it was somebody else.
- Does that make sense?
- Not really.
OK, go to sleep, we'll talk
about it another time.
Blowjobs.
- That's good, Daniel.
- It's Dan.
Forgive me, that's good, Dan.
Let's explore blowjobs.
There is no wrong way.
- Her blowjobs...
- Say it... to Evie.
Your blowjobs...
...aren't... very...
good.
They're not...
They're not that bad.
They are.
Well, you remember the last
time you went down on me, Dan?
- 'Cause I don't.
- OK. OK.
- Regularity's not the issue.
- Let's just... take a breath.
When was the last time
you had sex?
- Um...
- Like, um...
- It was, um, it was...
It was last month
before your fun run.
Was it?
OK. What seems to be missing
here is communication.
But you're both struggling
with that.
So as an experiment tonight...
...don't be Evie and Dan.
Instead,
be two different people
who aren't afraid to say
what they want.
Are you familiar
with role play?
Miss Redding,
sorry to keep you waiting.
- What? Why are you laughing?
- I'm sorry.
- Why is this funny?
- I'm sorry, I wasn't ready.
- Just do it again.
- Seriously?
- Go, sorry, I wasn't ready.
- Evie, don't laugh 'cause...
- You'll wreck it.
- Sorry.
Miss Redding.
Detective.
I'm going to need to ask you
a few questions,
if that's alright.
- Depends.
- On what?
On whether you're the good cop
or the bad cop.
- Which one are ya?
- Guess.
Good cop.
Guess again.
I said, guess again.
Now, Miss Redding,
are you going to cooperate?
Fuck me.
But they're watching us
behind the mirror.
Don't care. Fuck me.
- That was amazing.
- Yeah.
- You were amazing.
- So were you, E.
- Where did that come from?
- I don't know.
- You really became that guy.
- Detective Dan.
- So strong and believable.
- Really?
Yeah.
I mean it, Dan, maybe
you should have been an actor.
You have the right
to remain silent.
Everything you say... You have
the right to remain silent.
Anything you say
will be taken down
in a court of law.
You can't.
Yeah, I can. No, you can't.
Yeah, I just did it.
- Honey, you still awake?
-Yeah...
I really like
the role play thing.
Yeah, me too.
I definitely think we should
do it again sometime.
Hm.
Richard?
Richard.
Hey. I'm about to come, quick.
Quick, quick, quick.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- Yeah.
Oh, oh... Yes.
Yes.
You know
I'm not ovulating now, right?
Yeah, yeah, I just thought
it'd be a shame to waste it,
you know, just in case.
Oh, God.
- That was good timing.
- Hmm.
How was your day?
- Good. Fine. Boring.
- Yeah?
- How was yours?
- Same. Same.
- You smell good.
- Mm.
- Cup of tea?
- Yeah, thanks, hon.
Oop. Yep-
Earl Grey or Russian Caravan?
Earl Grey.
It's the same every time.
Two days before I start
ovulating, twice a day,
morning and night
in the recommended position.
And for 20 minutes afterwards,
I elevate my hips.
And it's been like that
for almost three years now
so you can't tell me that
there isn't something wrong.
There isn't something wrong.
Sometimes it just comes
down to bad luck.
Will you please just tell us
what to do?
'Cause I'll try anything.
Do you climax at the point
of ejaculation?
Mutual orgasms are said
to increase
the chances of conception.
So do you orgasm during sex?
Yeah, I mean, I have. Yeah.
While you've been trying
to conceive?
Oh, no, not since
I've been married.
How's your cervical mucus? OK?
It's good. Yeah.
Good.
And what about the doctor?
Did she say anything or...?
Actually, she, uh,
she did say one thing.
- Yeah?
- Um...
Yeah. She said that it might
help if I orgasm during sex.
You orgasm during sex
all the time.
Yeah, so...
Yeah, we just... We, uh,
keep doing what we're doing.
- Yeah.
- Knuckle down.
Hey.
If having a baby was easy,
everyone would be doing it.
I think everyone is doing it.
Yeah, but their babies suck.
Ours is going to be awesome.
- We'll be right.
I should get that.
That'll be work.
RICHARD: Hello.
You want to go outside?
Babe. What's wrong, honey?
My dad's dead.
Oh, my God.
He, uh... had a...
had a heart attack.
No.
I've never
seen you cry before.
MAN: Whoa, whoa, whoa...
Hey, the place looks great.
I am so jealous.
- Thank you.
- Well, slowly but surely...
Only one thing left to do now,
Paul.
- Yael.
- What do you mean?
I think she means marriage,
mate.
- Oh, right,
- What, it's been five years?
BOTH: Six.
- Six?
- Yeah.
- So what are you waiting for?
- OK, that's enough.
- No, it's OK, it's fine.
Uh, no, it's, like, we're not
really waiting for anything.
We're just not really marriage
kind of people, that's all.
Yeah.
What? We've talked about this.
- I know.
- We laughed about it.
We said we didn't need to go
through all that.
Yeah, I know. I know.
Um, should we do dessert?
- Yes, please!
- Let's do that.
- Great.
- Thank you.
Thanks, darling.
- You OK?
- Hmm.
- You seem a little bit...
- I'm fine, I'm fine.
Hey, can I ask you something?
Have you ever...
Have you ever raped anybody?
No. Who's been saying that?
- No-one, no, it's...
- Have you?
No.
No, I haven't and that's the
thing. I don't really want to.
Mate, that's good.
That's good.
- You don't have to.
- No.
Mate, I'm not...
No, it's not that, it's...
It's not me, it's...
It's Maeve.
She's got this, uh...
What?
I don't even know
what you call it.
- That thing, this, uh...
- Oh. Like a fantasy?
Yeah. A fantasy.
How did you know that?
OK.
Rape fantasy - very common.
No shit. That's what she said.
Yeah. Yael's got one.
Massive one.
- Really? And you've never...?
- No, can't be done.
I've tried but
it's a flawed fantasy.
- Not possible.
- Why?
Well, think about it.
The moment someone asks to
be raped, it stops being rape.
Right? It's only rape
if they don't want it.
- She wants it - not rape.
- Right.
The reason they can't get
what they want
is because they want it.
God, that doesn't seem fair.
Sucks, mate.
There's got to be something
I can do.
I just want to make her happy.
Whatever happened
to good, old-fashioned...
...run-of-the-mill sex?
- Yeah.
People have to complicate it
with all this kinky shit.
Yeah.
You don't have anything
like that, do ya?
- Hm?
- No weird fetish?
Nah. I mean, define 'weird',
you know.
Hi.
- Hi! Hi, sorry to bother you.
- That's OK.
Uh, were you in the middle
of something?
Oh, no, we're just having
some lunch. It's alright.
- Oh, I'm so sorry.
- That's fine.
I'll be quick.
Um, my name's Steve.
I've just moved in
down the road.
- Oh, we've just moved in too.
- Hey, how about that!
- Hello, welcome.
- Thank you.
Well, as I said,
I won't keep you.
- I'm doing the rounds.
- Nice.
- Visiting the neighbours.
- Good.
And I wanted
to give you these.
- Aww...
- My Way of saying hi.
Oh, my God. Golliwogs.
Also, I am required
by federal law to inform you
that I am a convicted
sex offender.
Where did you find Golliwogs?
I didn't think
they made them anymore.
- No, they don't, I do.
- Oh!
Yeah, baking
is my little hobby.
Amazing. I haven't seen these
since I was a kid.
I think they stopped
making them
on account of
the, you know, racism.
- Yeah, makes you think.
- Yeah, it does.
OK, well, I won't keep you
any longer.
- OK, thanks, Dan.
- Steve.
Steve! Sorry. Maeve.
Nice to meet you.
- Nice to meet you too.
- Thanks so much for this.
- Bye-bye.
- Thank you, bye.
Please be kidding,
- What are you doing?
- Nothing.
Well, could you brush
your teeth
if you're going to breathe
into my face like that?
I don't want to be
the bad guy here, Phil.
But you can't keep
falling asleep at work.
I mean,
you're dropping the ball.
So that's a penalty,
that's one strike.
I'm sorry,
it won't happen again.
- Alright, off you...
- I'm tired.
I didn't get that raise
that...
I told you why I couldn't
give you the raise...
...home life got
a little bit...
...times are tight,
money's tight.
I mean, we're all feeling
the pinch.
- I'm cancelling my holiday.
- Really?
- Shortening it, yeah.
- OK, I'm sorry.
It won't happen again.
Have you ever been
to Thailand?
You've never been, have you?
Remember I did my shoulder
in Bangkok?
The doctor put me on these.
Right?
These little suckers
will knock you out
a good six, eight hours.
OK, I'm not kidding
but be careful.
They're from Thailand
so they're not technically,
you know, legal.
I'm not great with pills.
I've got a really sensitive
gag reflex.
I almost choked on them
at a school camp when...
So I'll just...
I'll put them in some tea.
There you go.
Those'll do the trick.
That's the same stuff
they force-feed prisoners
when they riot.
So you want to sleep?
You're gonna sleep.
Oh... Come on, guys!
- Oi!
BOY: We were just...
You were just nothing.
Bedtime.
Monsters.
Hey.
Hey.
Hey!
Wow.
- Dad.
Uh, what are you doing up?
Off to bed, the pair of ya.
Don't make me come up there.
Good morning.
- How are you feeling?
- Fine.
Feeling better, actually.
Good. That's good.
I may be
a little late tonight.
Not too late, OK?
No? Why?
I don't know, I just thought
that we could...
What?
I don't know.
- You don't know?
- No.
You really don't know?
- I said I don't know.
- Right.
- Just not too late, OK?
- I won't be too late.
Oh, God, I am so sorry.
No, I'm sorry,
it's totally my fault.
Uh...
Golliwogs?
- Why do you have Golliwogs?
- Well, it's why I'm here.
I've just moved in
down the road.
And I thought I'd just pop in
and introduce myself.
- I'm Steve.
- Uh, Phil.
Pleasure to meet you, Phil.
Those are my little 'Howdy,
neighbour' gifts... for you.
God, this takes me back.
A simpler time.
It really was.
Also, I'm required
by federal law to inform you
that I am a convicted
sex offender.
This is so nice of you.
Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah.
Baby, you're not crying.
I don't think I have
any tears left in me.
I'm sure there's a few more
in there.
I mean, your dad
only just died.
Ooh. Baby, shush.
Sorry to keep you waiting,
Mrs Hawkins.
Actually, doctor, it's 'Miss'.
Well, Miss Hawkins,
why don't you take a seat?
You look very sexy
in that outfit, doctor.
Now, Miss Hawkins, I have
the results of your test here.
Oh, yes. Will you need
to examine me further?
Uh, no, no, it's conclusive.
And I'm afraid it's bad news.
Well, I have been
a very bad girl.
- Perhaps you need to...
- You have hepatitis.
- Sorry, what?
- Hepatitis.
Well, that's not very sexy,
is it?
No, no, it's not.
Particularly not hepatitis C.
So, I'm going to prescribe you
a course of interferon
and I'll give you the number
of a support group
in the area.
And I'll see you again
in a couple of weeks.
- Sorry, Dan, I'm confused...
- Dan?
It's 'Doctor'! Stay in it!
Now we have to start again.
No, no, we don't have
to start again.
- Just getting good too!
- How was it getting good?
Why do I have hepatitis?
Because I thought that your
character was, you know,
like, maybe got around a bit.
You know, a bit slutty.
I thought that would be sexy.
I'm not gonna want to have sex
if you've just diagnosed me
with an STD.
Just... Just make me
feel sexy.
Alright, alright, alright.
Do it again. I promise
I'll make you feel sexy, OK?
Um, go back to your spot.
I'll start here and...
- You alright?
- Just feel a bit hot.
Oh, is this part of the...?
We started?
Miss Hawkins,
I need to speak...
- Baby, you OK?
Hey. Hey, what's the matter?
Hey, you're right.
You're right.
Good thing I'm a doctor, eh?
Hello.
Nice of you to show up.
I had car trouble,
I'm so sorry.
- Ah!
- Oh, ah, sorry.
- Shh.
You're not fighting. You know.
- Keep going. Just keep going.
- How do you know?
No, no, baby. Your smell.
Just keep going.
Shit.
- My smell.
- Just keep going.
I even got these clothes
from a second-hand store.
It's still good, baby,
keep going.
- No.
- Yes, yes, yes.
No, I fucked it. I'm sorry.
Oh, come here.
- For a second, though?
- Yeah, definitely.
Yeah? I'm sorry
about the groceries.
- It's OK.
- I heard something crack.
- Eggs.
- Shit.
- The eggs?
- Yeah, it's OK.
- Really? I'll get more eggs.
- Shh.
- I'm sorry.
- Shh.
It's OK.
- Hey!
- Hey.
- Are you still working?
- Yeah.
I'm just cleaning stuff out.
It's good, actually. It's
keeping my mind off things.
You need to take a break,
baby.
You want to watch a movie
or something?
- Um... yeah, sure.
- Yeah?
I thought we could watch one
in bed?
- Alright.
- Alright.
Actually, I picked up a couple
on my way home.
What have I got?
I have got Sophie's Choice
or Philadelphia.
Any comedies?
Might be a bit heavy for me,
hon.
Oh.
Well, maybe later?
Will you come and help me
make some dinner?
Yeah, yeah, just give me
a couple of minutes.
Alright, well, I'll leave
the onions on the bench
for you to cut, OK?
Just... Onions again?
Jesus, R0, no of fence,
I'm a bit onioned out.
I feel like
we've been eating onions
every night
for the past week.
OK, alright.
OK.
- How was your day?
- It was good.
It was exhausting but good.
Oh, that's nice.
So you haven't been thinking
about your dad at all?
Well, I am now.
Why did you bring up Dad?
Well, you just haven't spoken
about him in a few days.
You must miss him.
I'm just trying not to think
about it.
Can we just talk about
something else?
Hey, you remember
when he used to leave
those ridiculously long
messages on your phone
and you wouldn't even finish
listening to them?
You'd just delete them.
You ever think about that
and wish you hadn't done that?
God...
Hey. Hey, heY-
Honey. Hey, what's wrong?
Look at me.
I just miss him so much.
Hey, it's alright, sweetheart.
It's OK.
I've got you, honey,
I've got you.
Hey, what... Are you serious?
What, I thought you wanted...
What, I wanted a handjob while
I thought about my dead dad?
No. Thanks.
Hello, girl.
You're my good girl,
aren't you?
My best girl.
I love you. I love you.
OK.
You ready for a little trip?
Just one night. I'll pick her
up again tomorrow afternoon.
- I don't know, R0.
- One night. That is all.
- Why?
- I want to take Richard out.
As a surprise and I don't want
him worrying about the dog.
You know what he's like.
- Why are you lying?
- What? I am not.
Yes, you are lying.
Your knee is twitching.
I have known you
my entire life
and you cannot tell a lie
without your knee twitching.
What's going on? R0!
Look, will you take her
or not?
Yeah, alright,
I'll take her but...
I gotta run.
I'll pick her up tomorrow.
Run away?!
How did she run away?
- L-l don't know, sweet...
- How did she get out?
L-I came home and
the side gate was open.
Why was the side gate open,
R0?
- I don't know, sweetheart.
- Jesus!
Oh, my God, you must be
feeling so emotional.
Come on, baby, come here.
It's alright.
I know how much
she meant to you.
Meant to me?! Don't say
'meant'! 'Means' to me!
Call me if she shows up!
- Miss Wickam, I beg of you!
- Mr Callum, hold your tongue.
I'm to be wed within the week.
You love him not.
If you walk away from me now,
you'll be making the biggest
mistake of my life.
I feel faint.
I used to be scared
of the idea of growing old.
Now I'm just scared
of the idea
of growing old without you.
- Baby...
- Shh.
What are you doing?
I was watching that.
No, wait,
I need to talk to you.
OK, talk to me but
can you turn the TV back on?
- No, this is important.
- What is it?
- I love you.
- How is that important?
- Give me the remote.
- No, no, wait. Listen to me.
I'm in this.
You and me, all the way.
- Are you?
- Yeah, of course.
Are you?
I mean, what if... what if
we were to take things
to the next level?
Oh, we are so
on the same page, it's scary.
Where are you going?
Is this next level enough
for you?
I need to tell you something.
Wait, wait, wait,
let me enter into it.
No, Dan, I'm not
doing this anymore, OK?
You're giving me really mixed
messages here, Evie.
I just want to tell you
something.
Well, tell me, tell me!
Just stop playing games!
- Tell me!
- Dan, I'm...
- No, leave it.
- Could be important.
I can promise you
it is not as important
as what I'm about to tell you.
I'm sorry, it's going to
annoy the shit out of me.
- Don't you dare.
- Don't I dare?
Calm down,
I'll be two seconds.
I'm asking you,
your wife is asking you
to not answer the door.
Yeah?
- Bad time?
- Uh, I don't know, maybe.
- Depends what you want.
- Good point.
My name's Steve. I've just
moved in down the street.
OK.
Just wanted
to introduce myself
and say hi to the neighbours,
that's all.
Uh, OK, yeah, in that case, it
is kind of a bad time, mate.
- Sorry.
- Yeah, of course.
I see you've
got your hands full.
Uh, look, I just wanted
to give you these
and I'll get out of your hair.
Thanks.
- They're Golliwogs.
- Yeah. Thanks.
Bet you haven't seen those
for a while.
Um, no. Suppose not.
- Uh, is that it?
- Uh... yeah.
Actually,
there is one more thing.
Yep?
I am required by federal law
to inform you
that I am a convicted
sex offender.
Yeah, that's fine.
Anything else?
No. That's everything.
OK!
Evie!
Evie, open the door.
Evie, don't do this.
Evie!
Honey, what are you doing?
Go to sleep.
No, I can't, I have to
finish these posters.
D'you think you'll be able
to put them up
around the streets tomorrow?
- Yeah, of course, honey.
- Thanks.
- I'm sorry.
- Baby, don't apologise.
It's not your fault.
I bet you anything that
when you get home tomorrow,
Roxy'll be here
waiting for you.
Run away?!
W-What do you mean?
How is that even possible?
Well, I think maybe she went
out the side gate
'cause the latch is broken.
- Why is the latch broken?
- It's a long story.
I'm so sorry, R0.
I-l didn't...
OK, you can never tell Richard
about this. I mean it.
What?
You can never tell him
that Roxy was here.
He will never forgive me.
Or you.
- R0...
- You gotta promise me.
- R0!
- No, promise me!
I promise, what is going on?
Oh, my God.
- Did you find Roxy?
- Not yet.
But we will. We will.
Hmm, the posters should help,
don't you think?
Definitely. Someone
will see those posters
and they'll call.
Yeah. So you put
all the posters up or...?
- Of course.
- Of course.
- Yeah.
- Hmm, that's weird.
What?
I was putting out the garbage
earlier today
and the bottom of the bag
split open.
- Oh.
- And I found these.
What the fuck, R0?
- I must have accidentally...
- Oh, must you?
That's bullshit
because you just told me
that you put up
all the posters.
Yeah, but what I meant was...
- Where's Roxy?
- I don't know.
Don't you?
Why are You lyin9 t0 me?
Why would you hurt me
like that?
I mean, do you not
want to find Roxy?
I did not hurt Roxy!
Who said anything
about you hurting Roxy?
- I didn't mean...
- What did you do to her?
If it was an accident,
just tell me. I'll understand!
- Did you kill her?
- What? No!
I did not kill the dog!
Can we help you?
I'll come back another time.
Just tell me,
what has happened?
Richard, I swear to you.
The last time I saw Roxy,
she was fine.
But there's something,
isn't there?
I know you, R0, I can see it.
There's something wrong
with me.
Um... I wanted to tell you
as soon as I felt it
and I should have but I...
I am sick, Richard.
- I'm so sick.
- Sick?
What do you mean, sick?
Sick, how?
God, I'm so afraid
to tell you.
It's not...
It's not cancer, is it?
- Baby, it's...
- It's not... cancer, is it?
It could be...
a bit of cancer, yeah.
Oh, God...
What does that mean -
'could be'?
Well, the doctor says
that the results are...
They're inconclusive.
Wait, wait, wait,
I'm confused.
It's OK, it's alright.
I've got you.
- Hey, let it out.
- No, no, no. I've got you.
- I'll be strong for you.
- Not too strong. Hey?
Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah!
Oh, my God!
Ah! Ah!
Ah! Ah! Ah!
- Just me!
Will you shut up?
The boys are asleep.
Oh, I know,
I-I'm sorry I'm late.
- I can explain...
- Stop fucking mumbling, Phil.
'Not too late.' Do you
remember saying that?
Yeah, I do remember
but I wanted to get...
I don't care.
Your dinner's in the fridge.
Want a cuppa?
If I find you sleeping
in this building again,
that's it, you're done.
Oh, will you just stop
mumbling?! I do not...
Oh...
Don't bother, mate.
Strike three.
My office.
Why don't we reschedule?
Fucking what?
Hey, honey bee!
I got a little surprise
for you today!
Hello?
What's with
the silent treatment?
Oh, Evie, talk to me.
Do you remember
what our counsellor said
about communication?
Yes, I remember
what our counsellor said
about communication.
I remember everything
our counsellor said
including the date and time of
the next fucking appointment.
Did you, Daniel? No.
Don't call me Daniel, Evelyn.
Daniel. Da-niel. Daniel,
Daniel, fucking Daniel.
Honey bee, honey bee,
I am sorry. I am so sorry.
I'm a shithead,
I completely forgot.
- Won't happen again, alright?
- Yeah, well, better not.
Got a present for you today.
Really?
- It's a video camera.
- It's for our role plays.
I thought we could tape
and watch it back.
- Dan.
- Don't you reckon?
- How much was it?
- Oh, no, it's nothing.
Couple of hundred bucks.
We should really be saving
right now.
No, no, we're fine.
Do you want to try it out?
I have costumes
and I've set up a little
something in the garage.
Let me get the light
and, uh, let me see,
press that there.
Evie, you look amazing.
This is so exciting.
- Uh, you ready?
- Yep.
And... action.
Um...
I hear you've been
misbehaving, prisoner.
Um... I always fall
for the bad boys.
What are you in here for,
stud?
Assault. Sexual assault.
I'll bet
she secretly loved it.
He.
- For fuck's sake, Dan!
- What?
You're trying to turn me on
by telling me
you have sexually assaulted
a man?!
It's called having
a back story, Evie.
- Something's burning.
Oh, shit. It's the light. Get
the door! Get the door, Evie!
- I am!
- Bloody thing.
We're fine! We're fine!
Everything's fine!
Close the door, Evie! Close
the door! Close the door!
No! Oh, fuck, Evie!
This cost $3,000!
Thank God it's working.
OK, let's go from the top.
- The top of what?
- The scene.
What scene? Dan, do you even
remember why we're doing this?
- For the sex.
- For the marriage.
You're really starting to
scare me. Look at yourself.
Don't even recognise you
anymore.
Babe, babe! Warden! Warden!
Perhaps we can have
a bit of fun before you go.
Hey.
- Where have you been?
- What do you mean? Work.
Well, I called your work
and they said that
you left hours ago.
- So where have you been?
- Just been in the car.
Don't you dare fucking mumble.
I've been in the car!
Honestly, I've just been
driving around, thinking.
Why weren't you at work?
Maureen, there's been
a bit of a reshuffle at work.
It's nothing I did.
Are you cheating on me, Phil?
What?
$500 on women's clothes.
$70 at The Body Shop.
- Interflora, David Jones...
- Show me that.
Fuck you!
We have a joint bank account,
you idiot.
- I can explain.
- Yes. Yes, this time explain.
I can... First of all,
I never did anything...
It's so complicated...
You're not going to
understand.
OK.
Yeah, I've been having
an affair.
It's over and
it will never happen again.
- Who is she?
- Someone from work.
- You don't know her.
- What's her name?
- Does it matter?
- What is she like?
- Don't do this.
- Is she younger than me?
- She's about the same.
- Prettier?
- Again, about the same.
- Is she thinner than me?
You have a lot in common.
She's not younger than me.
She's not skinnier than me.
She's not prettier than me.
Why couldn't it just be me?
Because she's softer than you.
She's quieter than you.
She doesn't yell at me.
She doesn't call me an idiot
or tell me to shut up
all the time.
She listens to me.
She's nice to me.
She doesn't make me feel like
the only thing stopping her
from being happy... is me.
Get out.
- Maureen.
- Get out, Phil.
Fuck it. Fuck.
At the tone,
record your message.
To end, press 'hash'.
PHIL: Maureen, pick up.
It's not another woman,
it's only ever been you.
I don't want anyone...
Oh, shit!
if you are satisfied
with your message, press 1.
To re-record your message,
press 2.
For more options, press 3.
- D'you make a wish?
- Yeah.
Yeah?
Are you gonna tell me
what it is?
No.
If I guess, will you tell me?
- Maybe.
- Maybe?
OK, is it a... car?
- No, it's not a car.
- OK, not a car.
Is it bigger or smaller
than a car'?
- I'm not telling.
- Alright.
Is it bigger or smaller
than... I don't know,
top of my head, say, this?
Oh, my God, if that is car
keys, I'm going to kill you.
- Paul.
- I'm not saying anything.
- No, this is not OK.
- Just open it.
Oh, wow.
- They're really beautiful.
- Yeah?
Yeah.
- Happy birthday.
- Thank you.
- Oh, what?
- No, I'm OK. I'm OK.
- Seriously?
- Yeah, I promise you.
Otherwise, we need to have
a little nap.
A nap? In the car?
While I drive?
Can you spare a dollar, mate?
No, sorry, mate,
we don't have any.
That's right,
you remember it.
Come on, man, just a dollar.
Mate, we honestly don't
have anything. I'm sorry.
Not one single dollar?
OK, you should just give them
what you've got.
- Alright.
- He doesn't have anything.
- For fuck's sake.
- That's what he said.
Alright, mate.
- Alright, that's fine.
- OK.
What?
Alright, you want phones?
They're yours.
There you go.
Oh, come on, mate.
That's enough.
You got what you wanted.
I wouldn't say that.
Aren't you
a pretty little thing?
- Alright, fuck off.
- What are you doing?
Sorry, sir, there's been
a gas leak in the garage.
- I can't let you through.
- A gas leak?
Hmm.
Paul! Paul!
Paul! Where are you...?
Is he OK?
Hey.
Hey, sweetheart.
- Where are we?
- We're in the hospital.
- Shit, are you OK?
- Am I OK?
Yeah, I'm OK. You're not OK.
You fractured your skull,
honey.
But you're going to be fine.
Oh, my God. How?
You fell and hit your head.
Really? I don't remember.
Yeah, the doctor said
you might not.
- It's OK, just rest.
- What happened?
Somebody hit you.
The car park.
Yeah. In the car park.
Did I rape you?
Shh.
That's what I was trying
to do, sweetheart.
- Shh.
- Those men, I paid them.
- I know.
- They were actors.
They were meant to hit me
with a fake bottle.
- Yeah.
- Did they use a real bottle?
- L-l don't...
- It should have been fake.
Honey, just try and rest.
Just try and relax.
- It was for your birthday.
- I know.
- As a surprise.
- I know.
Did I do it?
Maeve, tell me.
Did I rape you?
- Yeah. Baby, you raped me.
- Yeah?
Was it OK?
Yeah.
Was it what you wanted?
- Yeah.
- Thank God.
I really tried to think
of everything this time.
You know, I really put
some thought into it.
- I know.
- Yeah.
I practised.
But, you know, it was
my first rape and I...
I don't know if I'm, like,
meant to be a raper.
- Shh...
- 'Cause it was...
No, baby, it was perfect.
It was perfect.
Wait, so when
did I hit my head?
- Right after.
- Shit.
- There was more.
- No.
- There was more...
- No more, no.
I was meant to do
one more thing.
Pauly, no more, please.
Honey, no, that's enough.
Just one more thing.
Where are my clothes?
Please, just get my clothes.
MY leans.
The front pocket of my jeans.
Yeah.
You don't have to answer now.
I will be at Mum's until
you sort out your priorities.
You're my priority!
Done! Sorted!
Well, it doesn't feel like it.
You never look at me anymore.
You're late home
every night...
I'm under the pump at work,
babe.
That is bullshit. Bullshit!
I called your brother
and he told me
you've been taking
theatre lessons.
Theatre... Screen acting
classes. So what?
So what the fuck? Since when
did you want to be an actor'?
You're the one who said
I should get into it.
- What? When?
- Oh, God!
When we first started
this whole role play thing.
You said I could be
a famous actor. Your words.
That does not sound like
something I would say.
And that is not the point.
The point is you lied
about it.
I was embarrassed.
I mean, Jesus, Evie!
Me? An actor?
- It's crazy.
- It's ridiculous.
It's not ridiculous.
Dan. It's ridiculous.
Don't go. Evie.
Don't go.
If you walk out that door,
you'll be making the biggest
mistake of my life.
I used to be scared
of the idea of growing old.
Now I'm just scared
of the idea...
...of growing old without you.
- Ow. Fuck!
- What?
Oh, I got it in my eye.
Christ!
- Got what in your eye?
- Tiger Balm.
I got fucking Tiger Balm in my
eye. God, that really stings.
How did you get Tiger Balm
in your eye?
You're supposed to put it
near your eye.
Like, the bridge of your nose
and it makes you cry.
They showed us how to do it
in acting class this week.
You were acting?
Yeah, you couldn't tell,
though, right?
You are a psychopath.
You're not... you're not
even ready to be a husband,
let alone a...
Let alone a what?
Evie.
Let alone a what?
An actor?
You're not a fucking actor.
Wow.
What happened to you?
Where's Dan?
'Where's Dan? Where's Dan?'
Fuck Dan!
Dan is boring. He's pathetic.
Why do you keep going
on about Dan?
I can be better
than Dan, Evie.
I'm done with Dan.
Yeah.
Me too.
DOCTOR: OK, so I will see you
next time?
Have a good day.
Richard, come on in.
What's bothering you?
Um, well, I just wanted to
talk to you about Rowena.
- Where are you going?
- Uh, I don't know.
I just can't be here
right now.
Why?
I saw Dr Barnes today.
She said she hasn't seen you
in weeks.
- And you don't have cancer.
- I don't have cancer.
What the fuck is going on?
Well, I just came
from the doctor
and the results came back
and they are negative.
I don't have cancer.
We beat it.
No, it's bullshit.
Dr Barnes said she hasn't
seen you in weeks.
I never said
I went to Dr Barnes.
Yes, you did.
You said Dr Barnes.
Well, honey, if I said that,
I'm sorry.
I thought I had cancer,
I was a bit confused.
But I don't...
...have it.
- So there's no cancer.
- No.
Are you crying?
Aw...
- Sweetie, are you crying?
- Yes, I'm fucking crying!
- Ow! That hurt!
- Oh, did it? Good!
I hurt you, good!
Because I can't help but feel
that for the last few weeks,
you've been hurting me. Like,
deliberately or something.
- That is so crazy!
- Is it?
Then how come you keep putting
photos of my dad up
all around the house?
I put a couple up,
I don't keep putting...
But you do! This is
what I'm talking about!
You're not putting photos up,
except you are.
Y-You didn't throw those
posters out, except you did.
But only because you have
cancer, except you don't!
I can't trust you anymore, R0!
I still don't know where
Roxy is. My dad's dead.
I'm crying
all the fucking time.
I'm so dehydrated
and I can't help but feel
that you are somehow...
you're behind it all!
OK, firstly,
I did not kill your dad.
Boy, do I keep
picking the wrong times.
So sorry.
Richard, can you just...?
Wait, Richard!
Please, can you just stop
and talk to me?
- Honey, please don't go.
- Why?
Are you gonna actually tell me
what's going on?
Like, look in my eyes and
actually tell me the truth?
No, of course not.
All I ever wanted
was to have a family with you.
And now...
...shit, I'm almost glad
I couldn't get you pregnant.
I am pregnant.
What?
- Please come here.
- No, what did you say?
Don't fuck with me, R0,
not about this.
- What did you say?
- I said I'm pregnant.
Is that true?
Are you sure?
How can you be sure?
Just, I am, I'm sure.
You're pregnant?
That's what all this
has been about?
Why didn't you tell me?
Scared.
We're gonna have a baby?
We're gonna have a baby?
I thought
it was kicking.
It's just your knee twitching.
- Playing up again?
- Oh, no, it's fine.
It just hums sometimes.
Moni, this service
doesn't work
if the interpreter
is deaf too.
It's not quite
that bad.
- Getting worse, though?
- Please don't tell anybody.
I need this job.
- Thank you.
PHONE:
You've called Phone Fuck.
Which ones of our sluts
do you want?
- I beg your pardon?
- This is Phone Fuck.
Which girl do you want to
speak to, hon?
Can I just put you on hold
for a second?
Hello? Who do you want
to talk to?
Sorry, my name is Monica. I'm
calling from Video Relay...
I don't care, sweetie.
Just tell me
who you want to talk to
and I'll put you through, OK?
Yes, sorry, hold on.
- What are the options?
- Depends what you're into.
What have you got?
Lesbian, straight sex,
domination, blondes,
interracial, deep throat,
chubbies, trannies,
cougars, swingers, Asians,
gang bang,
big tits, small tits,
double penetration,
triple penetration,
squirting, arse to...
...midgets,
barely legal, gonzo,
bukaki, anal, you tell me,
we've got different girls
for different things.
- Straight blonde, please.
- Connecting you now.
Hey, this is Sonya.
Who's this?
Hi, this is Monica
calling from...
You sound really cute, Monica.
I don't normally do girls
but I'm so horny tonight,
I'll make an exception.
No, no, sorry, no. No.
I'm calling from Video Relay.
My name is Monica.
I have a caller on the line
that uses sign language and
I'll be interpreting the call
for both of you tonight.
What?
If you talk to me, I will
sign to the caller who's deaf
and he will sign back to me
and I will talk to you.
He's deaf?
Yes, that's right, he's deaf.
So he can't hear me?
No, he can't hear anything,
he's... deaf.
But he can see your hand signs
of everything I say?
Yes, sign language.
That's right.
I know a couple of words
in sign language.
I know 'cunt face'
and 'sunrise'.
Can he see me?
Like, what I'm doing?
No, nobody can see you.
He can see me. You're just
on a regular phone.
Right, gotcha, gotcha, gotcha.
- What does he look like?
- Um...
He's cute... I guess?
Look, can we just get started,
please?
Sorry,
what was his name again?
It'll be easier if you talk
to me as if I'm him.
What's your name?
- Sam.
- Fuck, that's slow.
Yeah, sorry,
there's going to be a lag.
What are you doing up so late,
Sam?
Just finishing some work. You?
I was waiting for you to call.
MONICA: What are you wearing?
Pink bra and panties.
What are you wearing?
- Just boxer shorts.
- Is he?
No, he's wearing a hoodie...
Why don't we take
those little shorts off?
Sorry, can you hang on
for one second?
Oh, shit.
Am I still holding?
What the fuck?
Oh, my God, yes, I'm so sorry.
Um...
Can you repeat
what you said last?
I said, why don't
you take your shorts off?
Fuckin' hell, man.
- Uh, his shorts are off.
- Are you hard?
Sorry, what do you mean
by that?
Oh, fuck! It's hard to get
a run on here.
- Ask him is his dick's hard.
- Yeah, of course. Um...
Uh, yes, yes, yes.
Sorry, yes, it is.
You want to put your
big, hard cock in my mouth?
Wow, can we just assume
he's gonna say yes to that?
Well, did he say yes?
Uh, I reckon he will
so can we just imagine
he's popped it all in there
and wrap this up?
- Just fucking ask him, mate.
- Wow. Killing me. Um...
Wow. He said yes.
Huh! What a shock.
What do you want me to do now,
lover?
Hello? What does he want me
to do now?
We're having a few technical
difficulties here.
Can I just put you on hold
again?
- Yeah, yeah. Fuckin' hell.
- Thank you.
- Hello, you there?
- Yeah, are you there?
mean, who's the guy?
What the fuck's going on?
Sorry, I'm just going to
backtrack.
Earlier, he said,
please to spit on his penis
to make it all slippery.
- OK.
Tell him I spat on it,
there's spit everywhere,
it's as slippery as fuck.
What's the problem?
He wants to... Oh, my God.
He wants to put his penis
in you... your vagina.
- Mm-hm.
- Your wet vagina.
Mmm, oh, fuck, yeah.
Oh, I'm dripping wet.
Oh, that feels good.
I want your big, hard cock
to fill me up.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, fuck. So deep, it hurts.
You have to eat it, OK?
You can spit it out as much
as you want
but you still have to eat it.
You're just gonna make
yourself dirty and sticky,
Nanna, and then I have
to clean it up.
I'm... I'm so sorry, I'm lost.
What does he have to eat?
Oh, shit! Don't tell him that.
I'm just talking to my nan.
And don't tell him that
either.
Listen, can l...?
I gotta do something.
Could you, um,
could you keep him talking
just for, like, one minute?
- Definitely not.
Can you hear that?
It's my nan, OK?
She's had a stroke.
She's fucked.
I need these calls.
I need the money.
Just for one minute.
It's easier than it looks,
honestly.
Please?
- Fine.
- Thank you, thank you.
OK, great. So just tell him
heaps of stuff
about how good his dick is
and how you want...
Hello? Hello?
Oh, Jesus Christ.
Would you like him
to fuck you hard or slow?
Why would you ask
in the first place?
He would like
to fuck you hard, actually.
SONYA: Hey, I'm back.
- Oh, God!
- Thank you, help me.
- Where are we at?
Uh, you are being fucked
from behind.
- Hard, in the arse, I think?
- Well, that was quick.
I know, that's what I said.
OK, um, can you tell me
what to say next, please?
Tell him it's the biggest dick
I've ever had.
Um, and next?
Does he want to put it
in my mouth?
It's just been in your arse.
So?
OK.
SONYA: What?
What's fucking funny?
This is a fucking prank,
isn't it?
It's really not.
- Um, he wants to hang up.
- Well, did he come?
MAN: Car trouble?
- Yeah.
Can I give you a lift
anywhere?
Um, no, it's fine. Thanks.
- Sure?
- It's fine, I'm sure.
- Thank you.
- Alright. Good luck!
Actually, wait...
Wait, please!
Thank you!
Thanks.
- Thank you.
- No problem. Don't be silly.
Thank you, though.
I really appreciate it.
My pleasure.
I need to get over the bridge,
if that's OK.
- Easy-peasy.
- Thank you.
Um...
Oh, um, actually,
I left the bonnet of
my car open, so I'll just...
No, no, stay there.
I'll get it.
Thanks.
Do you want me to get
anything else from the car?
Captions by CSI Australia