The Luckiest Man in America (2024) Movie Script
1
-Okay, Travis Dunn,
you're up next.
Travis Dunn?
Travis Dunn, you're up next.
Travis Dunn?
No Travis?
- All right, here we go.
-Hi.
-Welcome
to "Press Your Luck," Travis.
Oh, boy.
Oh, I can't believe
I'm finally hearing those words.
-Glad you're excited.
Tell us a little bit
about yourself, okay?
-Okay.
-Look at the camera.
- Um
Oh, oh, wait one...
What is that?
-A plate.
No Whammies, no Whammies,
no Whammies.
-Yeah, I love this.
Well, I guess that's it, Chuck.
No auditions necessary.
-No, no, he's not being serious,
okay?
Just please tell us a little bit
about yourself, okay?
Ready?
Three, two, one.
-Whew!
Hi. I'm Travis. Travis Dunn.
And I am just so darn excited
to be here.
I've never been to California.
I've actually never been
past Illinois, for that matter.
I just came off a three-day trek
from my hometown in Ohio,
a little place called Lebanon.
And I got to apologize
for my appearance.
I swear, I clean up nice.
-I mean, you must be pooped,
huh, Travis?
-Oh, no, no, not at all.
The adrenaline's
keeping me going.
I want to win the big bucks!
-What is it you do for a living?
-Yeah, I work...
I work in
air-conditioning repair.
And sometimes,
I drive an ice cream truck
during the summer
when I need to.
- Beautiful.
-So why do you want
to press your luck, Travis?
-To the camera, please.
-Honestly?
-Yes, please.
-Okay, so every morning,
I wake up to the smell of bacon
on the griddle,
eggs on the stove,
and sometimes burnt toast.
Don't tell my wife I said that.
And me, and Patricia,
and our little one,
we gather around
the breakfast table
and we watch your show
until I have to go to work.
It's our little ritual.
-In the middle of an audition.
-Oh, can -- can I just say --
I'm sorry,
Mr. Carruthers.
I just want to say
that you are --
-You're kidding me.
-You're like a hero in our home.
-Oh, stories like yours help me
know that my time's not wasted.
-Not at all. I love the show.
I've probably seen
every episode.
You know,
if presents aren't allowed,
I can take the plate back.
I didn't...
-Sylvia, can you please get
the real Travis
a couple of T-shirts
and let him know
that we'll be with him
in a second?
Hey, Jim, can you get
this guy off the lot, please?
-I'm not running.
I just...
wanted to say I'm sorry
if I caused any trouble.
-Let's go.
-This isn't even him.
Nice.
I swear,
I saw that on "60 Minutes" once.
-Stories like those are
why America loves game shows.
-Real people,
winning real money, yes.
- Huh?
I like the guy.
-Yep, 'cause he drove his ice
cream truck from Bumfuck, Ohio,
through the desert.
-All right, give it a rest,
Chuck, okay?
I'm in mourning.
-Sorry, Bill.
I get it, you know.
I'm not an idiot.
I'd cast the guy,
but he's a fucking creep.
-Oh.
-Shit, shit! Come on!
-I'm not moving until you go.
-It's broken, damn it!
Happy?
You can leave now.
Oh.
Um...
-I'll be damned.
You weren't kidding.
That's for sure.
Hm.
Um, you fucked up,
ice cream man.
-I know, I know.
I get so nervous, and I made
phone calls and sent letters,
and never heard back.
I just thought that...
-Listen.
-...maybe if I came here --
-You want
to know why I'm Chucky's boss?
It's because I can see
the future.
Tomorrow morning,
you are going to wake up,
you are going to trim
that beard and comb
that mop of yours,
and you get a decent jacket.
And then you're gonna show up
to this lot at 10:00 a.m. sharp,
and if you're late,
so help me God.
-Are you sure?
-We'll see you tomorrow.
-Okay. 10:00 a.m. sharp.
-What the hell am I thinking?
Um...
What the hell is your name, guy?
It's
Michael Larson, yeah.
-Michael Larson.
-It's gonna be $8.
Oh, you know what?
Um...
Jacket was actually damaged,
so...
-It's a thrift shop.
-Yeah, all the buttons are...
-I can give you 25%
off the jacket.
-Oh.
-You made me love you.
I wish I would have
never walked into that elevator!
I wish...
Damn it! Line!
-I wish I would have taken the?
-Stairs.
-Stairs. That's right.
-Jesus Christ,
who writes this shit?
-Okay, in we come.
Come on.
Quick, quick quick, quick,
quick, quick, quick.
Please.
-Hold for the tour.
-Oh, wow.
-That's it, in we come.
-This is pretty neat.
-So let me be the first
to introduce you
to our not-so-little home
we love to call Television City.
-Okay, let's get ready,
everyone.
-If you'd like to follow me this
way, the tour will continue.
-Okay, roll camera.
Now speed.
Action.
-Welcome to Hong Kong.
Just kidding, of course.
We are still here
in the CBS studios.
This is just one
of the nine productions
going on here at any given time.
-It's a live set.
Keep it moving, tour girl!
-Hey, boy, watch it!
-We broke ground in 1952.
-Cool!
Are those extras?
-And here is our little corner
of the neighborhood, Studio 33.
-Is this your wife?
You can stay with her.
You can -- All right, can we
send some more people down here?
I'm not going to
split up families.
We're not that kind of show.
-Sylvia, one of your sheep
have left the meadow.
-Yeah, come right around.
Hey, Charles, I think
you need about four more.
-Hey, you are not supposed to be
wandering around out here.
You have to stay
in the green room.
-We've got a lot of nice people,
a lot of good people
in the house.
-Hey, Sylvia.
Listen, I just wanted to say...
I-I apologize about yesterday.
-Oh. Well, um,
it was fine in the end.
And you're here, so...
I'm just glad
they didn't fire me.
-Me too.
-Hey, Sylvia,
ready for the next one.
-Okay.
-So...
-Yeah, we have to -- Yeah.
-Yeah.
-Today, these three players
are after big bucks!
But they'll have to avoid
the Whammies
as they play the most exciting
game of their lives!
From Television City
in Hollywood,
it's time to press your luck!
Here's your host, the star
of "Press Your Luck,"
Peter Tomarken!
-Thank you, thank you!
-Yes, thanks to you.
-Thank you, Rod,
thank you, audience,
and thank you to you viewers
at home.
And welcome to
the most Vegas game...
-And stop!
-$500 and a spin.
-Stop!
-$1,000 and a spin!
-Okay, Michael, Janie?
You're up next.
-Let's do it.
-$11,516, Ed.
That makes you
our winner today.
-Oh, my gosh,
this is so exciting.
-It's show time.
-Okay.
-Hey. No, uh, wait.
What are you doing?
-Just following orders.
-But the wife likes
the bow tie quite a bit.
-Yeah, I actually think this one
suits you a little better.
Bow ties are for chumps, anyway,
and I don't think that's you.
-Hmm.
-All right, gorgeous.
They're ready.
-Perfect. Okay, Ed,
if you'd like to follow me,
and, Janie and Michael,
just follow on afterwards.
We're gonna stick quite closely
here to this red backdrop
and take you to
the other side of the stage.
Yeah, we're on our way.
Just be careful
of these wires here.
People trip all the time.
-Really neat, isn't it?
-And careful as we
come around the corner.
The stage juts out kind of far,
and you don't want
to hit your --
-Sylvia, I thought I told you
to stop bringing in such
good-looking contestants.
I'm starting to think you're
trying to make me look bad.
Hello. I'm Peter.
Peter, Peter. Hello.
-Peter Tomarken.
-Yes, Peter Tomarken.
That is --
You are correct, sir.
Hello. Hi, Ed Long.
Long time no seeing you, buddy.
Okay, all right.
Big bucks today, okay?
-You guys are going down.
-Okay. And if you'd like to
follow me, we're ready for you.
-Next batch
coming out of the oven.
Catch this lot
airing in two weeks.
-Rod Roddy.
Oh! I'm sorry.
-Ow!
-Michael!
-Ow!
-You got me with the Whammy.
-Okay, just this way.
-Bill, you guys ready
for the next one?
Betatonic VHS tapes.
Keep your most precious memories
safe in one place forever.
-Oh, they're just throwing us
in the deep end, huh?
-Perfect. Right.
-I'm glad my wife packed me
an extra jacket.
-Hey, you sure I look okay
with the --
-Bill?
You hear that?
Da-na-na-na na-na na-na
Da da da-da-da da da-da da
-All right.
Oh, there's my boy.
-Da-da da-da da-da da
da da-da-da-da da-da
-Chuck, you want two scoops
or one?
-Listen, I'm lactose intolerant.
Thank you very much, sir.
-All right, everyone set?
All right, let's have some fun.
-Peter on his mark?
All right,
we'll begin in five, four...
-Three, two.
-You ready?
-Always.
-Big smiles! Come on!
-Today, these three players
are after big bucks,
but they'll have to avoid
the Whammy
as they play the most exciting
game of their lives.
From Television City
in Hollywood,
it's time to press your luck.
And now the star
of "Press Your Luck,"
Peter Tomarken!
-Thank you, thank you.
Thank you, Rod,
thank you, audience,
and thank you to you viewers
at home.
And welcome to
the most Vegas game in America.
-This guy.
-He's just busting our balls.
He doesn't mean anything by it.
-He's here to look pretty,
not to have opinions.
Ready three.
-Go three.
-Because today
is the final game
of our big Home Player Spin.
- Boo, boo, boo.
-Yes, yes,
it really is very sad,
but at least good old Billy
of Greenville, Kentucky,
won himself a trip...
-Ready three.
-Go three.
-...in Hawaii!
So let's meet
our three contestants vying
for the big bucks today.
11,516 buckaroos yesterday, Ed.
-Yesterday? It feels like
just 15 minutes ago, Peter.
- Well, you got
your church vans, Ed,
but let me ask you,
what are you going to do with
the rest of the money, huh?
Are you going to buy
a bunch of E-cup brassieres?
-Well, no, I definitely
won't be doing that, Peter.
I'm not sure what I'll do.
I can still hardly believe it.
-Well, believe it, baby.
Let's hope you add to that
today.
-Thank you.
-Our next contestant
is Michael Larson.
Welcome, Michael,
from Lebanon, Ohio.
-Yes, sir.
-And, uh --
And what do you do there
in Lebanon, Ohio, Michael?
-Oh, I drive an ice cream truck.
And I --
But I'm hoping
to make enough money
so that I can take
next summer off.
-And -- And -- And, uh --
And who do we have
watching at home in Lebanon
today, Michael?
-That would be my little girl,
Susie, watching.
And the most beautiful,
prettiest girl in all the world,
my wife, Patricia.
-The most beautiful woman
in the world?
Michael, you should
have warned me.
I --
-Where do you guys
find these people?
-What can I say, Arnold?
Crazies come to me.
It's a blessing and a curse.
-Yeah, I get it.
-Finally, Janie Litras...
-Rough around the edges.
-...a dental hygienist
-from San Bernardino.
-And clout.
-Clout.
-Yeah, that's right.
-Let's stop talking.
-I work for a crazy
Polish dentist who's been known
to booze with his patients
before operations
to calm down a little.
-Well, there's nothing wrong
with that.
You all know how it goes.
You buzz in with the correct
answer to the trivia question,
you get three spins.
If you agree with
the correct answer, one spin.
Incorrect answers,
well, no spins, of course.
Okay, let's get right to it,
folks.
Crow's-feet are facial lines
around the eyes
that we get from squinting.
According to a study,
at what age --
Janie?
-40?
-On average,
is it 30, 40, or 50?
Ed?
-Michael?
-40, yeah.
-That is right.
It is 40. It is 40.
Janie gets three spins.
Ed and Michael each get one.
And that's nothing that I have
to worry about at my age, right?
I mean, I'm not a day over 25,
so...
All right, next question.
You probably have
president FDR in your pocket
right now because
his likeness --
-Uh, $50 bill?
-His likeness appears on the
head side of what American coin?
-Slow your roll, buddy.
-Ed.
-Ah, he's just nervous.
-Well, I don't have
any $50 bills in my pocket
right now like Michael, Peter,
so I'm gonna say dime.
-Janie?
-Me too.
-It is the dime.
-Just have fun with it.
-I thought you told your boy
to study his trivia, Bill.
-Those who sailed
in the wooden shoe were Wynken,
Blynken, and --
Ed?
-Nod.
- Nod. Michael?
- Uh, Nod.
-Janie?
-Nod.
-Yes, it's Nod.
That is right.
What member of the wedding party
is responsible for giving
the check to the clergyman?
Michael?
-It's the best man.
-Ed, he says it's the best man.
What say you?
-A pastor really should know
this one, shouldn't he, Peter?
-He should know it.
-I'm going to say the best man.
-Janie.
-Best man.
-Yes, it's the best man.
-Whoo.
-Michael gets three spins.
We'll cozy up with you know who
and see if we can't turn
those spins into big bucks.
-Big bucks.
-Right after this.
-No Whammies.
- And we're out. Back in 60.
-60, okay. Um...
-This is fun, right?
-Yeah, real good.
Um, hey, could -- could I go
make a phone call real quick?
-Oh, phones are prohibited
during tapings.
Standards and practices.
But if you'd like
to stretch your legs or...
-This adrenaline has me itchy.
Do you think I have time
to do a lap?
-Well, you have 60 seconds.
-Todd.
-Oh, thank you.
-Careful.
Whitman.
-Thank you.
-Mm-hmm.
Bill.
-Thank you.
-You're welcome.
-Did I miss the spins?
-Oh, no, ma'am, just in time.
-Here. I remember what you like.
-Oh, thank you, honey.
-You're welcome.
-You're late.
-Don't tell Kauffman.
Some old guy
and his wife over at "Price"
snuck a newspaper
into the audience.
-Did they walk away
with anything good?
-They weren't even contestants.
-All right, team, we're back in
five, four...
-Five, four, three, two.
-Welcome back
to "Press Your Luck."
You know what time it is, folks.
I'd like to introduce you
to my much edgier costar,
the big board.
Now, the big board is filled
with money,
a couple of surprises
here and there,
including a dreamy stay
at the iconic Fairmont Resort
in Hawaii.
But be careful of the Whammies,
because they'll take you
right back down to zero.
Now, remember,
you can pass your spins
at any time during your turn.
The player with the lowest score
after the trivia round
gets to go first.
Michael, that's you.
Oh.
I think I'm ready.
- Hey!
Smile! "Big bucks! Big bucks!
No Whammies!"
- Oh. Right.
Big bucks, big bucks, come on.
Stop!
- $2,000.
Michael, now, do you want to --
you wan to pass your spins,
or do you want to keep going?
-I'll keep going, Peter.
-Okay.
-Come on.
No Whammies.
Big bucks.
Stop!
-Wow.
Another $1,500, Michael.
What do you want to do, Michael?
Do you want to --
you want to go again?
-Keep going.
-Okay, he's going to go.
Let's go, let's go.
Stop! Oh!
-Ah, the Whammy.
-Shit. Fuck.
-Whoops.
Can we say that?
Is that PG?
Can we say that?
-Fuck.
-Can we say "shit" on CBS, Bill?
-I can't fix that in post, boss.
-Okay, we gotta go again.
Let's remind our contestants
to watch their mouths.
-Travis!
-Charles, shut the fuck up.
-Who's Travis?
-Come on, guy, come on.
-All right, resetting again
to the Whammy reaction,
and let's all remember
to watch our language.
Guy? Guy in the middle?
This is daytime.
-Sorry, habit.
-Wash your kids' mouths
with dish soap...
-Taking it again.
-...for less swear words.
-Three, two.
-Tough luck there, Michael,
but you'll get them next round.
For now, you're down to zero.
Okay, Ed, it's your turn to take
on the big, beautiful board.
You ready?
-Well, I am ready for it, Peter.
-Let's go, big bucks.
-Come on,
we want to see some big bucks!
Big bucks! Yeah!
-No Whammies, no Whammies!
Stop!
-We did it last time,
and we can do it again.
And stop!
-Come on, give me big bucks!
Stop!
-Stop!
-Stop!
-And...stop!
Whoo-hoo!
-And now pull into the lead
as we head into our next trip.
Stay tuned.
-And we're out.
That's 90.
Can we get makeup, please?
Makeup for Peter.
-I don't sweat, I glow.
-Bathroom?
-What?
-Yes, I got to move.
-Me too.
This coffee really got me going.
-Yeah, same.
We should all go
to the bathroom.
-We'll be right back...
-Okay, it's right this way.
The men's are on the right,
and ladies --
-Thanks, Sylvia.
-I-I thought you had to go.
-No, I know what you said about
standards and practices and all,
but I'm an idiot,
and in all the rushing around
today and all the hoopla,
I just -- I-I forgot to call
my little girl on her birthday.
-Wow.
-Yeah.
It's 3:30 where she is,
so she must have just finished
cartoons, and, uh...
Please, I'm just kind of
freaking out.
-Oh. I really can't.
The rules, yeah, I know.
-Yeah, yeah.
-But I just --
I wouldn't even ask
if it didn't mean everything.
Imagine if your daddy didn't
call you on your special day.
-Bill found me where they find
all great game-show
personalities --
wearing a mouse costume
on Hollywood Boulevard.
Isn't that right, Rod?
Isn't that right?
-That's correct, Peter.
-See? That is correct.
-Come on, come on.
-Hello. No one is available
to take your call.
Please leave a message
after the tone.
- Uh, you know, hey!
Today's the day.
You need to pick up the phone.
So if you can be close by
the phone, I would really --
-Hey, come on.
-Shit! Fuck me!
I'm sorry. I didn't --
-Oh, um, everyone back to set.
-Nervous tic?
-Oh, I'm quitting smoking.
-Good for you.
Sorry about the Whammy.
-Huh?
-Wha-wha! The Whammy.
-All part of the game, right?
At least I get to go first
this next round.
Bigger prizes, bigger Whammies.
-Enjoy, and big bucks,
as they say.
Well, that certainly was a
sobering 90 seconds, wasn't it?
-Four, three...
-Big smile, smile, smile, smile!
Yeah.
-And we're back with round two,
folks.
Bigger prizes, bigger Whammies.
Now let's get right to it.
Now, the player
with the lowest amount of money
from round one gets to go first.
Michael, that --
-That's me.
-Yes, that is you, Michael.
- All right.
Okay. All right, now.
Let's see those big bucks.
Big bucks!
Stop!
-$4,000 and a spin!
-Gonna keep going. I'm going.
-Okay.
All right, he's gonna go,
he's gonna go.
-Stop!
-$5,000 and a spin!
-Nice.
-Uh, Michael, you want to --
you want to pass,
or you want to keep going?
-Oh, I'm going to keep going.
I'm going.
-Okay, here we go.
-Alright.
Stop!
-$4,000 and a spin!
-Wow!
-Whoo!
-Michael, you're on a roll!
-Again, let's go again.
-Michael, you're up to $13,000.
Now, do you want to --
you want to go again?
-I said again!
-Okay, he wants to go again.
-Stop!
-$16,000, Michael Larson!
What are you thinking, Michael?
That's a lot of money.
-Are we all seeing this?
-I said again.
-Quite a roll he's on.
-You should know better
than to doubt me by now.
-He's really getting up there.
-Lady Luck is on his side.
- Big bucks.
Stop! Whoo!
-I just can't believe this.
Okay, what do you want to do?
-Oh, uh, keep going.
-You -- You want to keep going?
Okay, we're going to --
we're going to keep --
we're going to keep going.
Michael wants to keep going.
-This is what we want, right?
-He's got nerves of steel,
this guy.
-Stop!
-Wow!
-Okay.
-What do you want to do?
-I want to keep going, Peter.
Stop!
-Michael Larson,
that is $19,000.
$19,000, Michael.
-$21,000 is the highest
we've had, right?
-That's if you don't hit
a Whammy.
Michael, I want you
to think about this.
-Fucking pass, man.
-I'm going to press my luck.
I want to keep going.
-Okay, he's -- he's --
he's going to go.
Michael's gonna go.
-Stop. Whoo!
-Holy shit!
-Record, record, record.
Uh, go to the thing.
-Record breaker!
-$24,000 makes you our
biggest winner to date, Michael.
-Okay, so he's a --
he's a record breaker.
-I got to ask you.
-Okay, now pass it.
-Think about this.
$24,000 is a lot of money,
Michael.
Are going to go?
What are you going to do?
Are you done, Michael Larson?
-Don't stop!
Come on, you got this!
-No, no, you're gonna go?
-What's wrong with this guy?
-Well, biggest winner,
biggest loser.
Either way,
I don't write the checks.
Don't tell Kauffman.
-Stop! Whoo!
-$4,000 and a spin.
Michael Larson,
that was terrific.
$28,000!
-Whoo!
Yes, again!
Again, again!
-He's going to go!
-Commercial in 15.
-Tell Junior to bring me Peter.
-In here?
-Where the hell else?
-We'll be right back
to watch Michael Larson
take the name of this game
to heart
right after these messages.
-Four, three, two, one,
and we're out.
That's a two.
-Wow. Hey, hot hands,
that was pretty cool.
-Hey.
Bill wants to talk to you.
-Do you know what for?
-No, I have no idea.
-Bill, is everything good
up there?
-Can you stop smiling just
so I can get in your creases?
-Oh, I'll try.
-All right.
-So dinner tonight, ladies,
on me.
Ed?
-You know, I, uh --
I don't know if our boyfriends
would be too happy about that.
-They're the jealous type,
all of them.
-But, you know,
you make it to $50,000,
I think they could
look the other way.
Yeah, well, easy, then.
Just cancel your plans, then.
-$50,000.
I bet your wife won't mind
you coming home with that, huh?
-Hmm.
-$28,000 begs to differ
with you, Mr. Carruthers.
-Well, Peter,
something is, um...
-What?
-Something's off with him.
-What, you think he's shitty?
-We don't think he's --
-No, no, he's just not playing
the fucking game right.
-He's got a loose nut
or something.
-He's not computing the risks,
Pete.
-Yeah, well, it seems
to be working out pretty
well for him so far.
Besides, what do you
want me to do about it?
I mean, I'm a little rusty,
but...
-Oh, for fuck's sake.
You've got to scare him.
-Well --
-With -- With the chances.
-All right, look, look.
We love the guy, right?
And we want him to go home
a winner, but this is enough.
-All right, can we have
all our contestants back
into places, please?
-Ah!
My shin!
Fucking jerk!
-Oh, shit.
Shit! I'm sorry.
-Three, two...
-And we're back
with an unbelievably exciting,
tense game of "Press Your Luck,"
where Michael Larson's
winnings continue to grow
despite the formidable odds
stacked against him.
Now, Michael, I have seen a lot
of lucky streaks in my day,
but no one, and I mean no one,
has ever been as dumbly brave
as you.
Now, the mathematicians
up in the booth
are giving me six-to-one odds,
Michael.
That means you push it
six more times,
one of them is bound
to be a Whammy.
Now, we'd hate to see you lose
it all, Michael, am I right?
- Go for it, Michael!
-Well, that's one man's opinion.
Michael, what do you want to do?
Do you want to spin
and risk losing it all?
It's a lot of money, Michael.
It's a lot of money.
-What the fuck is going on?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, let --
let me think about it.
Um...
You're right.
You're right, Peter.
That's a lot of money.
-It's a lot of money, Michael.
-Yeah.
I think you got to spin it
to win it.
I'm here to win it,
and I want to play,
and I say
I'm going to go again.
-I'm going to go again.
-Fantastic.
I tried to warn him.
Close your eyes, everybody.
Michael's going streaking.
-Todd.
Give me a walkie.
- Stop!
-Chuck, uh, buddy,
could you switch over to two?
-Okay, Michael,
what are you going to do?
-I'm going to spin again.
-Okay, he's gonna spin.
-Bill?
-I think I got played.
-Stop!
-I'm sorry,
can you say that again?
My volume is really low.
-Damn it, Chuck, just find out
who the fuck this guy is.
-Unfortunately, that's
above my pay grade, Bill.
-Stop!
-Well, then, uh,
we might just have to
change your title, then.
-I got to ask you
to think about this.
It's a lot of money, Michael.
Are you going to go to?
What are you going to do?
Huh, do you want to --
you want to keep going?
-Okay, Todd, I'm driving.
-Oh, I can do it.
-That wasn't meant
to be a conversation.
-Thank you for calling
the audition hotline
for "Press Your Luck."
If you would like to take our
trivia quiz, please press one.
If you would like --
-Fucker.
-And sometimes,
I drive an ice cream truck
during the summer,
when I need to.
Huh?
-Can I help you?
-Oh, Jim.
Hey, how you doing, man?
I'm just, uh...
-Can I...help you?
-Whoo! Whoo!
-Unbelievable.
-Something's wrong.
Don't spiral.
-You think
that he's working alone?
-Is anyone listening to me?
-We don't even know
that he's doing anything at all.
-I mean, m-maybe we --
we t-take a break
while we figure things out.
-Oh, no. You can't do that.
You got to let him play
without interference.
Innocent until proven guilty.
-All right.
-The law remains,
even in the studio.
-You going to go again?
-Earpiece!
-We might have an earpiece.
-Jesus, he's just itchy.
-Let's take a break for tech.
-I'm going to keep going!
Keep going, Peter.
-Yes, now.
And if I find out
that any of you are in cahoots
with this fucking guy,
I will find you.
-Big bucks, come on!
Stop!
-Unbelievable.
More of the force
that is Michael Larson
right after this short break.
-Already?
-And we're out in five,
four, three.
- 45 seconds.
-No Sweat A.C.
-Uh, is this Lyle Roberts?
-The one and only.
What can I do for you?
-Um, this is, uh...
...Bill.
And I'm a clerk
at the Justice Court of Lebanon.
-Okay.
-And, um, I'm calling
because your restraining order
came across my desk
against Michael Larson because
it's about to, um, time out.
And we were just calling to see
if you wanted to re--
renew the charge.
-Oh, already?
Uh, yeah, we just got back
on our feet
after his last Ponzi scheme.
-Sure, sure. Yeah.
We just actually have
a few questions, if that's okay?
-Okay.
-Could you let us know
if he has violated the --
the order to date?
-No, not to my knowledge.
-Okay, great.
And, um, can you, um, remind us
what the initial charge
was for again?
-What did you say
your name was again?
-I beg your pardon?
-Dude, my copy here
says we still got 16 months
that we don't have to
worry about the guy.
Michael, is that you,
you fucking loser?
If I see you again,
man, I'm going to fucking --
-You going to keep that promise,
Michael?
-Huh?
-You said dinner tonight
if you hit 50K.
-Oh, yeah, uh-huh, yeah.
Um, you seem nice, but I don't
know why I said that earlier.
My wife would kill me.
-Don't worry about it,
sweetheart.
You take it all home to her,
hmm.
-Do I need any makeup?
-What's the use?
He's the only one being seen
on-screen.
-He's just a bit of a sweater.
-Do I look like I'm sweating?
Am I sweating now?
- Mnh-mnh.
-All right, please keep it
together, everyone.
-All right, my little bunny.
Come on, smile!
-My mom says hi
and have a good first day.
-Hey, you got your ice cream?
Yeah!
-No, Mom, it's different
this time.
-Patricia!
I'm gonna get your mommy here.
-Ice cream for breakfast?
-Okay.
-You're living the dream.
-All right, here we go.
-...one of my favorite songs
by Waylon Jennings.
-What the fuck?
-Amanda, light up my life.
Okay, Amanda,
what do you want to do?
You're at $4,500.
You have --
-Lily is a veterinarian
from Sherman Oaks.
-That's right.
-Wow, that's an interesting
job, isn't it?
Uh, what's the most
unruly animal
you've ever had in your office?
Cecilia, you're at $750.
You have three spins.
What do you want to do?
-Again.
-Okay.
Oh, Cecilia,
don't go breaking my heart.
Don't break my heart.
No Whammies, no Whammies!
-Stop!
-$3,000 and a spin!
$3,000 and a spin.
$68,500.
How does it feel
to own a network, Michael?
-It feels good.
Another spin would feel
even better.
-Okay, all right.
-Stop!
-You going to go again?
What are you going to do?
-I'm going to go again!
I'm going to press my luck!
Stop!
-T-shirts, really?
-Uh, yeah. First count's full.
We're heading on to
the second episode.
Um, hey, do you think
I could talk to you
about something for a second?
-Later.
-We're out in three, two...
-How much time's left?
-Oh, there you are.
What the fuck you find?
-Watch.
-Do not wander off.
-What? What the fuck?
-Watch, watch.
Hey, Whitman, can you rewind
to the last three spins, please?
-Is this overtime?
-Will you just, please?
I said please.
All right,
go to Michael Larson's close-up.
Now watch his eyes.
Now watch the board.
-Stop! Whoo!
-Okay, next spin.
Slow it down.
Watch his eyes.
Now watch the board.
Watch his eyes.
Celebrating a little
prematurely, don't you think?
And stop.
-Chuck, what the hell
am I seeing here?
-Um...
he's memorized Bill's patterns.
-Memorized the patterns?
-Yes.
-Aren't they random?
-There are five.
-Five?
-Who gives a fuck about
how many patterns --
-More than five, at least!
Bill, what the fuck?
-Whoa, whoa.
Enough. Enough.
The good news is,
is that he's cheating.
Well, he's cheating.
-He's cheating?
-Yeah.
-Yeah.
-Oh, Chuck,
you are one smart cookie.
And that is why
I keep you around.
-I told you he was
a fucking creep.
-Yes, yes, you did.
-You guys,
I'm so sorry about this.
It's just the nature
and the reality of game shows.
Here we are. Have a T-shirt.
For you.
-You got to be kidding me.
I lost my Saturday for this.
-No, thank you.
-Jack.
-Another one.
-Hazel.
-I can wear it to bed, I guess.
-Perfect.
-Keep it.
Hey, blow him up
with a fucking Whammy.
-Yeah, if only
I had the chance.
-Sorry again about that.
-Yeah.
-Say, "No Whammies!"
-No Whammies.
-So lucky.
-Lucky? Well...
Yeah, my take on luck
is that luck
is just a good excuse
to do nothing
and then hope that
an opportunity comes a-knocking.
If you open your eyes
and keep your mind wondering,
you'll find that the best
opportunities just sprout up
in places
that people aren't looking.
Oh, and here's a tip, too.
Stop giving your money
to that place.
What you do is you go to a bank,
you sign up, you cash out,
close down.
-Sign up, cash out, close out.
Bright kids.
I'm going to grab a snack.
I'm burning a lot of calories
up there.
Ed, do you want something?
-No, thanks.
-Sit tight, everyone.
-Thank you.
-The big guys upstairs say the
next episode will begin shortly.
Has anyone seen my Pepto?
-I have not.
-Yeah. It's good.
-...to see it.
-Yeah, it's my favorite.
They have these carne asada
tacos that are extraordinary.
-Oh.
-Yeah, yeah.
So what -- what are -- what are
you doing this weekend?
-I thought you were going to
pick me up on the Bronco.
-Am I going to pick you up?
Yeah, yeah.
-Oh, come on.
-Hello?
-Hey, um, you picked up.
Hey, where the heck is --
-No, I didn't realize you'd
invited the entire, whole class,
um, but it's her birthday,
Patricia.
I should be able to call her.
-No, no. Just, uh...
Well, I've been busy
out of town.
Yeah, you know what, Trish?
I'm actually closing
a big deal right now.
I'm right smack-dab
in the middle of it.
It's going to change everything.
It could change everything
for us.
If you give me --
-No, I know.
-No.
-Susie, phone!
-Oh, baby, Susie!
Oh, my Susie baby!
Sue.
What kind of cake?
Oh, no. You don't like
chocolate, do you?
-I like it now!
It's my favorite!
-No. Oh, well, happy birthday,
my sweet girl.
Oh, you sound so big.
-Hey, I'm not done!
I'm still eating that!
-I miss you.
-I miss you, too, Daddy.
I'll save some cake.
Are you coming over?
-Yeah, no, I, um...
Hey, you know what?
Can you put Mommy back on?
-No, that's mine! Give it back!
-Just for --
Hey, Trish? Hey, baby?
-Moving to places!
-Ah, shit!
-Oh! Oh.
- You scared me.
My gal's a worrier.
-Hmm.
-She, uh, you know,
likes me to check in on her.
-Mi-Michael, where have you --
-Hey, there, Ed.
Hey, Janie.
-Keep heads turning with Timex.
We'll be watching you.
-Ed, have you seen
my grip master?
-No.
-Janie, have you seen it?
Janie?
-What?
-Have you seen my --
Your -- Your what?
-Grip master.
-I'm glad it's gone.
-No, no, no.
I refuse to believe it.
-I don't know what to tell you,
Bill.
He's not cheating.
-He's counting cards.
-It's not blackjack, Chuck.
Anybody could have memorized
five patterns.
-We're back in one.
-So -- So what can we do?
-You ride it out.
It's Michael's show now,
unless he gives up or slips up,
whichever comes first,
then get more patterns.
Who in God's name
said five was enough?
-Well, we -- we didn't have
the budget.
-Might have cost you
less than $65,000.
- Arnie.
-What are you doing?
-Time to call Kauffman.
-No. Are you fucking kidding?
No more calls in or out until
we can get ahead of this thing.
-Can I go to the ladies' room
at least, Bill?
-I don't know.
Can you?
-Whitman, hold.
I'll be right back.
-All right, everyone,
we're gonna hold --
-Okay, um, ideas.
-Well, he slipped up before.
Maybe he'll slip up again.
-Hey, Bill,
Peter wants to talk to you.
-Tell him to go sit on a duck.
-Fresh out of ducks, Billiam.
But I just want to say
thank you for forgetting
the Home Spin today.
If you guys really don't need
me, I can go home for the day.
-Right.
-Let's play.
-Okay, you heard it.
Let's play.
-They say there's a first time
for everything.
Well, this game
is no exception.
This is the first time in the
history of "Press Your Luck"
we won't be finishing
in our allotted time.
This is Hurricane Michael,
an ordinary man from Ohio.
He has, until now,
put the network out of $69,500
with no end in sight.
Now, let's pick up
where we left off,
with Michael winning
and the rest of us wondering
if we'll be working for him
by the end of the day.
-What can I say, Peter?
I'm feeling really good.
-You've still got two spins,
Michael.
You couldn't give
those spins away.
What -- What are you
going to do?
-Again!
-Of course, he's going to go.
Okay.
-Come on, big bucks!
Stop!
-Oh, my...
-Let's go! Let's go! Let's go!
Let's go! Let's go! Let's go!
-He's going, he's going.
He's going.
-What's -- What's wrong?
-That sound means it's time
for our final Home Player Spin.
Now, our lucky home player,
and, Michael,
they are indeed lucky
to be paired with you,
will get whatever amount
you land on.
Now, Michael, why don't you
pick up that card
right there in front of you and
tell us who you're playing for?
-Hmm.
-Who's the lucky guy or gal?
Michael?
-Lyle Roberts from...
Cleveland, Ohio.
-From Ohio!
A couple of Buckeyes!
From one Ohioan to another.
Well, you wouldn't happen to
know Lyle, would you, Michael?
You guys hang out together?
-Ohio is a very big state,
Peter.
-Touch.
Well, Lyle Roberts,
this one is for you.
Okay, let's get it.
-Stop!
-A trip to the five-star luxury
Fairmont Resort, Hawaii.
Lyle Roberts, you will
receive the equivalent of that.
Okay, Michael,
you still got this one spin.
What are you gonna do with it?
-Oh, wait, wait.
-Holding.
-Did somebody move the light?
-The light?
What -- What light?
-There's a light directly
in my eyes.
-No, no.
-Do you see that?
In the middle there.
-Did somebody move the light?
-Nobody moved the light.
The lights are fixed.
-I'm going to take a lap.
-Nobody is leaving.
-This is just about ridiculous.
-We'll get someone
to look at the light.
Nobody move.
-Just get somebody
to look at the light, all right?
-We're not wasting
any more time. Janie!
-What the fuck did he say?
-The light?
-What light?
-Someone get eyes on that.
I just want to get today
over with.
-What did I say?
-Sorry, D,
but I-I've got a crew
who would like to get some sleep
before coming back
to the studio tomorrow.
-That's assuming you all have
jobs to come back to, right?
-Ron!
-It has gone to the dogs.
-I'm, uh -- I'm sorry
she pulled you away
from whatever you were --
-$70,000.
That's like two salaries,
isn't it?
Well, so we got a fucking dud.
Well, I guess that's
the first time
in all the time
we've worked together.
-I guess it only takes one dud
to find a flaw in the system.
Five patterns, Bill?
-Hey, it's not my game,
it's this fucking guy.
-I don't know what to tell you.
Heads are going to roll
for this.
Who let him in?
-Um...
Well, he, uh --
Uh...
-Captain going down
with the ship?
-No, Chuck Turner.
-Oh.
-Chuck, yeah, he -- he -- he's
the one who handles casting.
-Chuck, that's right.
Chuck.
Let's get Chuck up here.
-Right.
-Um, can you, uh...
-You have to go back.
-No sorry. Why?
Because he has nothing
to be sorry for.
-Hey, guys,
I just need it quiet, okay?
We're about a half-hour past
where we should be.
-Who the hell is this guy,
anyway?
You guys are giving him
special treatment.
No, no, we're not.
I bet Junior would love to find
out you let him use the phone.
-Junior, you know what?
I'm out with Janie.
-Whatever.
-What's going on?
-They're fucking with me.
Lyle Roberts.
-Well, who is it?
-Somebody who...
was a real ass to me.
-I'm sure it's just
a coincidence.
-No.
No, it's not.
-Are you doing something wrong?
Just take a deep breath.
-Yeah.
-Most times when I feel
like someone's watching me,
turns out to be my own shadow.
-I don't have eyes on Chuck.
No, we can look for him.
-Junior!
-Does anyone have eyes on Chuck?
-Well...
Oh, I'm gonna do what you said.
I'm gonna take a breath.
-Thank you for your patience,
folks.
Please sit tight
and don't wander off.
-Michael!
-I said please sit tight.
-The phone was taken in
for maintenance.
You must have
a real nice VCR, huh?
Man, but you forgot about
the consequences, Michael.
Careful.
Is this the example that you
want to set for your daughter?
It'd be a real pity if you
got held up here in L.A.
Hmm.
Tell me, Michael.
Who the fuck were you calling,
anyways?
Drive safe, Michael!
Ah.
-Oh, excuse me, sir.
Sir?
Hey!
My truck!
Somebody broke in.
What in the --
Oh, hi.
Sorry to bother you.
Have you been here all day?
-No, I just got called in.
They needed backup.
-Hey.
-Well, my truck --
-You got the call, too?
-Yeah, they sounded
pretty desperate.
-Must be a big scene.
-Yeah.
-Kind of quiet.
-Suspect --
-Suspect --
-Suspect is approaching.
-Suspect is approaching.
-Suspect is approaching.
-Suspect is approaching.
-Kind of quiet.
-Hey, hey, buddy!
Right behind you!
-Hey!
-Remember it all with Iomax,
iodine supplements for memory.
Memorize the patterns
for your favorite game show.
And now your host, Leon Hart.
-All right, folks, we have
a great show for you tonight.
I want to --
Well, hello.
-Oh, shit.
I-I think I got turned around.
-Yet you are right
where you're supposed to be.
Funny how that happens, huh?
Your seat's right there.
-Hello.
-Oh, come on, people.
It's okay.
He doesn't bite.
I think.
Do I know you from somewhere,
Michael?
Not "America's Most Wanted,"
right?
-Boy, I hope not.
-Where you coming in from?
-Uh, Lebanon.
It's a little city in Ohio.
-Capital O-H...
-I-O.
That's right.
-That's a good long ways away
to land here,
gracing our humble stage
tonight,
but no one ever comes
to Hollywood by mistake,
and no one ever calls
from Vegas just to say hello.
What's got you running
from Ohio?
-Uh, well, you know, it's, uh...
It's funny.
Uh...
All I want to do is
have breakfast with my family,
but the only way
that I can do that is if...
I'm on their television set,
if it's tuned to the right
channel, at the right time,
on the right day.
I don't know.
Maybe this time
I've pushed it too far.
I went 3,000 miles away
to get closer to my little girl,
but now it's --
now I'm just 3,000 miles away.
Maybe that's for the best.
The mess I've made.
All these months of hard work,
though,
they -- they were for her.
Trying.
In the only way
this brain knows how to work...
I'm trying.
I think I may have needed
a bit more luck
in this town than I thought.
-You must be doing
something right, son,
because no one ends up
in my chair for no reason.
-My, um -- My Patricia, she --
she just goes gaga over you.
-Well, your Patricia
has got excellent taste.
You know, I --
-Michael!
-Well, if I didn't lose
my job yesterday,
I'm sure as hell going to lose
it today, so thank you for that.
-Suspect is on red leather.
-Sylvia, you found him?
-Yeah. No, I have him.
Um, yeah,
he turned right around.
We're -- We're on our way
back now. Thanks.
Just please, please,
please, for me,
just stay in your seat
until the end of the episode.
-We want Michael!
We want Michael!
- Wow!
Bravo, bravo!
-Chuck's a sucker
for these kind of things.
-Jack is back.
-You're crazy about this guy.
-Hell no.
-They love you, Michael.
They love you.
-Can you turn
the applause light off?
-I'm not pressing the button.
-Just fucking mute it.
-Okay.
-I thought you ran
a tighter ship than this, Bill.
-Well, I thought we took care of
our little ice cream man problem
organically,
but I guess we weren't so lucky.
Ron, welcome to the party, sir.
-Chuck, I'm surprised
you're still with us.
-Bill, what's he talking about?
-Uh, Chuck, we have a problem.
Um, somebody
didn't vet this guy.
Um...
-It's a shame.
-Charles.
I'm -- I'm sorry.
-You guys want to hear
the fucking truth, huh?
-Wait, are we being
fucking idiots?
I mean, this -- this guy's
about to be a national hero.
The little guy who comes
and takes down the man.
I mean, that --
that's a narrative
we should embrace in a big,
fat bear hug.
I mean, if Michael's
making money off us,
we should do the same.
Yeah, we'll --
we'll do it better.
You know, we lean in,
promote the hell
out of this show.
Michael Larson,
the luckiest man in America.
-Yeah, CBS makes
Michael's dreams come true.
-Exactly.
-Oh, you're thinking
like an executive.
-I mean, that -- that's
the American dream, right?
I mean, that's
why people watch game shows.
-Better watch your back, Bill.
Todd's coming for your job.
-Well, after all, I-I taught him
everything he knows.
-Yeah, get me Carl Johnson
at GGT.
Tell him that we are
going to have
bigger ad space
than the Olympics.
-You may have saved my skin
with that one.
-Yeah, now.
-Whoo!
Oh, big bucks.
Stop!
Let's go! Let's go! Let's go!
Let's go, let's go, let's go!
Let's go!
-He's going!
He's going, he's going.
-This is Lyle.
-Sorry, I have the wrong number.
-One second.
Cut that down, Patricia.
Cut that down, please.
Hello?
Patricia.
-Patricia?
-Cut that down, please.
-Wahoo!
-$97,750!
-Michael, do I even need to ask?
-Let's go, baby, let's go.
- Okay.
-Stop!
-Again!
-You just made it all the way
to $100,000, Michael,
more than anyone
in the history of game shows.
-Peter, I never would
have believed --
-Well, believe it, believe it.
Now, Michael, we have
someone special on the phone
who I would imagine is very,
very proud of you.
-Hello?
-Uh, h-hello!
-Hello?
-Yes, am I speaking to
the most beautiful woman
in the world?
-What?
-Patricia, it's -- it's Peter.
-Who?
It's -- It's Peter Tomarken.
-Who?
-Uh, from "Press Your Luck."
-What the fuck?
-Calling you from CBS...
-What is this?
-...in Los Angeles.
-Uh...
-I'm here with -- I'm here with
your husband, Patricia.
-Michael,
what's he talking about?
-Trish, I'm -- I'm on the show.
I'm finally doing it.
I'm winning.
-He's winning. Not only
is he winning, Patricia --
-Jesus, Michael,
what is wrong with you?
You've got to stop.
You're making me
absolutely crazy.
-Let me, uh,
call you back later, Trish.
We can -- We can talk --
-I don't want a TV character.
I want normal.
Sign the papers and move on,
Michael.
You really just don't know
when to stop, do you?
-It seems that we've
lost connection.
Um...
I'm -- I'm sorry.
I-I don't -- I don't --
I don't know what to say.
Um...
Come on, Michael.
Mike.
Michael.
-Fuck you, Peter!
-Yeah, fuck you!
-Excuse me.
Excuse me just a second.
-Hey! Please.
Please sit down.
Sir!
- Fuck you, too!
-Bill, if you're going to use me
as a scapegoat,
I'd like a little warning.
-You should have run that by me.
You're jeopardizing
all your jobs.
-This does not come from me.
I have no idea who would --
You?
-Me? Me?
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
I did exactly what
Junior told me to do.
-Junior, who authorized
that patch?
-I got a fucking note, Bill.
I thought it was you.
-See?
-Fucking circus.
-Okay, okay. It doesn't fucking
matter who made the call.
Let's fix it.
Pretend it never happened.
Sylvia, I need you
to get Michael some water
and back on set.
Are we ordering dinner?
-Uh, don't worry.
-Okay.
You copy?
-Todd, uh, we have a problem.
He's not coming out.
-I want a phone now!
-I'll go get the pastor.
-Todd.
-Uh, no, no, no, no.
This is my show.
I'll deal with him.
-Mike, I know it's been
a hard day for you.
I don't think any of us
could really know the depth
of what you're going through.
- Okay.
Cynthia, what's the word?
-Um, it's Sylvia.
Uh, he's locked himself inside.
-But -- But knowing you,
Michael,
you'll be able to get out
of this one, too.
-I'm a fuck-up.
-Michael, it's Mr. Carruthers.
You are anything but a fuck-up,
my friend.
-I'm here, Mike.
-I thought I could change
for her,
but my worst idea yet.
Should have never come here.
The whole place is a lie.
-Hey, you're doing the best
you can with what you got,
and it seems pretty darn good
to me.
-Ed, you heard her.
She just wanted normal.
-When she fell for you, she
fell for anything but normal.
-Okay.
Michael Larson.
-Hi.
-Oh, boy, you fucked me,
Michael.
No, I guess you know by now
that we know what you're doing.
-Well, what am I doing, then?
- Michael.
-What?
-You memorized the fucking game,
Michael.
-Is that cheating?
Oh, well,
I would just rather get my money
and get on the road, you know?
-Oh, no, I-I understand that.
But, uh, Michael --
Um...
Michael, have a seat.
Um, Michael, there --
there is no money
without finishing the show.
I mean, you must know that.
Listen, you had us squirming
there for a minute or 20,
but, um -- but now we, me, CBS,
we want you to win,
because you're a star.
Oh, yeah, I saw it yesterday,
but I didn't --
I didn't know
it was going to strike me
like a fucking truck today.
But you are a star,
and you're about to be seen
on every television screen
in America.
National hero.
I mean,
they're talking T-shirts,
coffee cups, talk shows.
Michael Larson,
luckiest man in America.
My friend,
you are about to take off,
and -- and we want to be
the wind beneath your wings.
And it all starts with you going
back out there and winning.
-T-shirts?
-Yeah, T-shirts, you name it.
So, Michael, you just
go out there and you push it
until we say stop.
-Mike, is everything okay
in there?
-Um...yeah, I'm just --
we figured it out.
I do want to, um,
talk to her first.
-Of course.
Just take your time.
Get yourself ready,
and we'll see you back onstage.
-Bill.
-Charles.
-Some people are using this
for personal calls.
Here.
-Are you coming up?
-After you.
-Hey, what the hell is this,
gentlemen, Shangri-la?
Fucking television studio.
Let's go, let's go.
We almost got in a little bit
of trouble there, didn't we?
We sure did.
We sure did.
Motherfucker.
-Huh.
-11:00 a.m., here we come.
Okay, uh,
let's get into our places.
It's, uh, time
to make some money.
-That's my cue.
-Be good to our boy out there.
Todd, you want to drive?
-Uh...
-All right.
Make me a drink?
-Guys, the ice cream man
is back.
-Why ice cream man?
-It's because he's
an ice cream man, Ron.
He's a fucking ice cream man.
-Fantastic.
-You got this, Michael!
-We love you, Michael!
- We love you, Michael.
-All right, cozy in, boys.
-Everyone quiet!
-This could be
a profitable night.
-Five, four, three.
-Michael Larson,
the man who cannot be contained.
Well, Michael, here we are.
I think I know the answer,
but I have to ask.
With one spin still on the
board, what are you going to do?
You know what?
I think I'm --
I think that I'm going to
pass my turn to my --
to my good friend Ed Long.
Wow.
-No.
-What?
I thought you -- I thought you
took care of this, Carruthers.
-Son of a bitch!
-Ed, uh, you're up next.
If Michael can do it,
you can do it.
-Well, I'm ready for it, Peter.
-Big bucks, no Whammies!
Big bucks.
And...
-Oh! That's okay.
Janie, you're up.
-Come on, give me big bucks,
big bucks!
No Whammies!
And stop.
-$750. $750 and a spin.
-Whoo!
-Okay, you going to go again,
Janie?
-I'm going to go again, Peter.
-Let's go again.
-It's giving big bucks.
-Michael Larson back in command.
Michael? Janie just passed
her last spin to you, Michael.
You have to spin it
one final time.
- Don't fuck it up, jerk.
Do we have to air it?
-Just once.
-Just once.
-All right, just once.
And then it's dead
and buried for good.
-Okay, let's see
if Michael knows
how to jump off
this speeding train.
Michael, I'm going to
close my eyes.
But you,
please don't close yours!
-Stop!
-Well, yesterday feels like
just 15 minutes ago, Peter.
-Well, you got your church
vans, Ed, but let me ask you,
what are you going to do
with the rest of the money?
Are you going to buy
a bunch of E-cup brassieres?
-Uh, no, I definitely
won't be doing that, Peter.
I'm not sure what I'll do.
I can still hardly believe it.
-Well, believe it, baby.
Let's hope you add to that
today.
Now, our second contestant
is Michael Larson.
Welcome, Michael,
from Lebanon...
-Oh, my goodness.
Who is that?
-Daddy.
-Yeah.
-Oh...
-Come here.
-...I drive an ice cream truck,
but I'm hoping
to make enough money here
so I can take next summer off.
-And who do we have
watching at home
today in Lebanon, Ohio,
Michael?
-That's right, I got
my daughter, Susie, watching.
And --
-Seriously, Trish?
You ready for school?
-I want to watch Daddy.
-I know.
-No, no. We're late.
-You're late for school.
-Let's go.
-Come on.
-Go ahead.
-No fair.
I'm sick, Mom!
-Love you, sweetie.
Have a good day at school.
...to calm down.
Well, everyone needs a drink
before they have
dental surgery.
Wouldn't you agree?
Yes.
Uh, okay, folks,
you know how it goes.
Buzz in with the correct answer
to the trivia question,
you get three spins.
You agree with
the correct answer, one spin.
Incorrect answers,
well, no spins, of course.
All right,
let's get right to it.
What member
of the wedding party
is responsible for giving
the check to the clergyman?
-The best man.
-Michael?
-That's the best man.
-Uh, Ed, he says the best man.
What say you?
-A pastor should know this one,
shouldn't he, Peter?
-Yes, he should know this, Ed.
-I'm going to say best man.
-Janie, is it the best man?
-Yes.
-Yes, it's the best man!
Michael gets three spins.
-Stop!
-$16,000, Michael!
-Whoo!
-$16,000. What are you --
What are you going to --
-Again, again! Come on, now!
-Gonna go.
-All right!
-Listen to me,
I hate to throw you
off your rhythm,
but this is your sixth spin,
Michael.
Now, the people in the booth
are telling me
the forecast is looking Whammy.
-Come on, Michael.
-Stop!
-Oh, my...
Okay, Michael.
Here we go.
Michael, I'm going to
close my eyes,
but you,
please don't close yours!
Stop!
-That is the game!
A washer and dryer
valued at $800.
The unrefuted,
luckiest man in America.
What are you going to do,
Michael?
-I don't know.
I don't know. We'll see.
-We all hope and wish the best
of luck for you, Michael,
you and your --
and your family.
-I understand that yesterday
was your daughter's birthday.
-Yes.
-What happened?
-I didn't have any money
really to buy her anything.
She's -- She'll get
something now, very nice.
-Like perhaps the state
of Tennessee.
And what did you used to do,
Michael?
What kind of work?
-I've been an air-condition--
whoa --
air-conditioning mechanic,
and I drove an ice cream truck
for about 10, 12 years.
But I'm not this summer.
No way!
-Evidently not!
But you have won
at least I think three times
more than anybody's ever won
on this show.
Congratulations.
Spend it wisely.
And get your daughter
a lovely birthday gift.
-Okay, thank you.
-It's been a real treat.
Ed, you're leaving
with $11,516 --
-Okay, Travis Dunn,
you're up next.
Travis Dunn?
Travis Dunn, you're up next.
Travis Dunn?
No Travis?
- All right, here we go.
-Hi.
-Welcome
to "Press Your Luck," Travis.
Oh, boy.
Oh, I can't believe
I'm finally hearing those words.
-Glad you're excited.
Tell us a little bit
about yourself, okay?
-Okay.
-Look at the camera.
- Um
Oh, oh, wait one...
What is that?
-A plate.
No Whammies, no Whammies,
no Whammies.
-Yeah, I love this.
Well, I guess that's it, Chuck.
No auditions necessary.
-No, no, he's not being serious,
okay?
Just please tell us a little bit
about yourself, okay?
Ready?
Three, two, one.
-Whew!
Hi. I'm Travis. Travis Dunn.
And I am just so darn excited
to be here.
I've never been to California.
I've actually never been
past Illinois, for that matter.
I just came off a three-day trek
from my hometown in Ohio,
a little place called Lebanon.
And I got to apologize
for my appearance.
I swear, I clean up nice.
-I mean, you must be pooped,
huh, Travis?
-Oh, no, no, not at all.
The adrenaline's
keeping me going.
I want to win the big bucks!
-What is it you do for a living?
-Yeah, I work...
I work in
air-conditioning repair.
And sometimes,
I drive an ice cream truck
during the summer
when I need to.
- Beautiful.
-So why do you want
to press your luck, Travis?
-To the camera, please.
-Honestly?
-Yes, please.
-Okay, so every morning,
I wake up to the smell of bacon
on the griddle,
eggs on the stove,
and sometimes burnt toast.
Don't tell my wife I said that.
And me, and Patricia,
and our little one,
we gather around
the breakfast table
and we watch your show
until I have to go to work.
It's our little ritual.
-In the middle of an audition.
-Oh, can -- can I just say --
I'm sorry,
Mr. Carruthers.
I just want to say
that you are --
-You're kidding me.
-You're like a hero in our home.
-Oh, stories like yours help me
know that my time's not wasted.
-Not at all. I love the show.
I've probably seen
every episode.
You know,
if presents aren't allowed,
I can take the plate back.
I didn't...
-Sylvia, can you please get
the real Travis
a couple of T-shirts
and let him know
that we'll be with him
in a second?
Hey, Jim, can you get
this guy off the lot, please?
-I'm not running.
I just...
wanted to say I'm sorry
if I caused any trouble.
-Let's go.
-This isn't even him.
Nice.
I swear,
I saw that on "60 Minutes" once.
-Stories like those are
why America loves game shows.
-Real people,
winning real money, yes.
- Huh?
I like the guy.
-Yep, 'cause he drove his ice
cream truck from Bumfuck, Ohio,
through the desert.
-All right, give it a rest,
Chuck, okay?
I'm in mourning.
-Sorry, Bill.
I get it, you know.
I'm not an idiot.
I'd cast the guy,
but he's a fucking creep.
-Oh.
-Shit, shit! Come on!
-I'm not moving until you go.
-It's broken, damn it!
Happy?
You can leave now.
Oh.
Um...
-I'll be damned.
You weren't kidding.
That's for sure.
Hm.
Um, you fucked up,
ice cream man.
-I know, I know.
I get so nervous, and I made
phone calls and sent letters,
and never heard back.
I just thought that...
-Listen.
-...maybe if I came here --
-You want
to know why I'm Chucky's boss?
It's because I can see
the future.
Tomorrow morning,
you are going to wake up,
you are going to trim
that beard and comb
that mop of yours,
and you get a decent jacket.
And then you're gonna show up
to this lot at 10:00 a.m. sharp,
and if you're late,
so help me God.
-Are you sure?
-We'll see you tomorrow.
-Okay. 10:00 a.m. sharp.
-What the hell am I thinking?
Um...
What the hell is your name, guy?
It's
Michael Larson, yeah.
-Michael Larson.
-It's gonna be $8.
Oh, you know what?
Um...
Jacket was actually damaged,
so...
-It's a thrift shop.
-Yeah, all the buttons are...
-I can give you 25%
off the jacket.
-Oh.
-You made me love you.
I wish I would have
never walked into that elevator!
I wish...
Damn it! Line!
-I wish I would have taken the?
-Stairs.
-Stairs. That's right.
-Jesus Christ,
who writes this shit?
-Okay, in we come.
Come on.
Quick, quick quick, quick,
quick, quick, quick.
Please.
-Hold for the tour.
-Oh, wow.
-That's it, in we come.
-This is pretty neat.
-So let me be the first
to introduce you
to our not-so-little home
we love to call Television City.
-Okay, let's get ready,
everyone.
-If you'd like to follow me this
way, the tour will continue.
-Okay, roll camera.
Now speed.
Action.
-Welcome to Hong Kong.
Just kidding, of course.
We are still here
in the CBS studios.
This is just one
of the nine productions
going on here at any given time.
-It's a live set.
Keep it moving, tour girl!
-Hey, boy, watch it!
-We broke ground in 1952.
-Cool!
Are those extras?
-And here is our little corner
of the neighborhood, Studio 33.
-Is this your wife?
You can stay with her.
You can -- All right, can we
send some more people down here?
I'm not going to
split up families.
We're not that kind of show.
-Sylvia, one of your sheep
have left the meadow.
-Yeah, come right around.
Hey, Charles, I think
you need about four more.
-Hey, you are not supposed to be
wandering around out here.
You have to stay
in the green room.
-We've got a lot of nice people,
a lot of good people
in the house.
-Hey, Sylvia.
Listen, I just wanted to say...
I-I apologize about yesterday.
-Oh. Well, um,
it was fine in the end.
And you're here, so...
I'm just glad
they didn't fire me.
-Me too.
-Hey, Sylvia,
ready for the next one.
-Okay.
-So...
-Yeah, we have to -- Yeah.
-Yeah.
-Today, these three players
are after big bucks!
But they'll have to avoid
the Whammies
as they play the most exciting
game of their lives!
From Television City
in Hollywood,
it's time to press your luck!
Here's your host, the star
of "Press Your Luck,"
Peter Tomarken!
-Thank you, thank you!
-Yes, thanks to you.
-Thank you, Rod,
thank you, audience,
and thank you to you viewers
at home.
And welcome to
the most Vegas game...
-And stop!
-$500 and a spin.
-Stop!
-$1,000 and a spin!
-Okay, Michael, Janie?
You're up next.
-Let's do it.
-$11,516, Ed.
That makes you
our winner today.
-Oh, my gosh,
this is so exciting.
-It's show time.
-Okay.
-Hey. No, uh, wait.
What are you doing?
-Just following orders.
-But the wife likes
the bow tie quite a bit.
-Yeah, I actually think this one
suits you a little better.
Bow ties are for chumps, anyway,
and I don't think that's you.
-Hmm.
-All right, gorgeous.
They're ready.
-Perfect. Okay, Ed,
if you'd like to follow me,
and, Janie and Michael,
just follow on afterwards.
We're gonna stick quite closely
here to this red backdrop
and take you to
the other side of the stage.
Yeah, we're on our way.
Just be careful
of these wires here.
People trip all the time.
-Really neat, isn't it?
-And careful as we
come around the corner.
The stage juts out kind of far,
and you don't want
to hit your --
-Sylvia, I thought I told you
to stop bringing in such
good-looking contestants.
I'm starting to think you're
trying to make me look bad.
Hello. I'm Peter.
Peter, Peter. Hello.
-Peter Tomarken.
-Yes, Peter Tomarken.
That is --
You are correct, sir.
Hello. Hi, Ed Long.
Long time no seeing you, buddy.
Okay, all right.
Big bucks today, okay?
-You guys are going down.
-Okay. And if you'd like to
follow me, we're ready for you.
-Next batch
coming out of the oven.
Catch this lot
airing in two weeks.
-Rod Roddy.
Oh! I'm sorry.
-Ow!
-Michael!
-Ow!
-You got me with the Whammy.
-Okay, just this way.
-Bill, you guys ready
for the next one?
Betatonic VHS tapes.
Keep your most precious memories
safe in one place forever.
-Oh, they're just throwing us
in the deep end, huh?
-Perfect. Right.
-I'm glad my wife packed me
an extra jacket.
-Hey, you sure I look okay
with the --
-Bill?
You hear that?
Da-na-na-na na-na na-na
Da da da-da-da da da-da da
-All right.
Oh, there's my boy.
-Da-da da-da da-da da
da da-da-da-da da-da
-Chuck, you want two scoops
or one?
-Listen, I'm lactose intolerant.
Thank you very much, sir.
-All right, everyone set?
All right, let's have some fun.
-Peter on his mark?
All right,
we'll begin in five, four...
-Three, two.
-You ready?
-Always.
-Big smiles! Come on!
-Today, these three players
are after big bucks,
but they'll have to avoid
the Whammy
as they play the most exciting
game of their lives.
From Television City
in Hollywood,
it's time to press your luck.
And now the star
of "Press Your Luck,"
Peter Tomarken!
-Thank you, thank you.
Thank you, Rod,
thank you, audience,
and thank you to you viewers
at home.
And welcome to
the most Vegas game in America.
-This guy.
-He's just busting our balls.
He doesn't mean anything by it.
-He's here to look pretty,
not to have opinions.
Ready three.
-Go three.
-Because today
is the final game
of our big Home Player Spin.
- Boo, boo, boo.
-Yes, yes,
it really is very sad,
but at least good old Billy
of Greenville, Kentucky,
won himself a trip...
-Ready three.
-Go three.
-...in Hawaii!
So let's meet
our three contestants vying
for the big bucks today.
11,516 buckaroos yesterday, Ed.
-Yesterday? It feels like
just 15 minutes ago, Peter.
- Well, you got
your church vans, Ed,
but let me ask you,
what are you going to do with
the rest of the money, huh?
Are you going to buy
a bunch of E-cup brassieres?
-Well, no, I definitely
won't be doing that, Peter.
I'm not sure what I'll do.
I can still hardly believe it.
-Well, believe it, baby.
Let's hope you add to that
today.
-Thank you.
-Our next contestant
is Michael Larson.
Welcome, Michael,
from Lebanon, Ohio.
-Yes, sir.
-And, uh --
And what do you do there
in Lebanon, Ohio, Michael?
-Oh, I drive an ice cream truck.
And I --
But I'm hoping
to make enough money
so that I can take
next summer off.
-And -- And -- And, uh --
And who do we have
watching at home in Lebanon
today, Michael?
-That would be my little girl,
Susie, watching.
And the most beautiful,
prettiest girl in all the world,
my wife, Patricia.
-The most beautiful woman
in the world?
Michael, you should
have warned me.
I --
-Where do you guys
find these people?
-What can I say, Arnold?
Crazies come to me.
It's a blessing and a curse.
-Yeah, I get it.
-Finally, Janie Litras...
-Rough around the edges.
-...a dental hygienist
-from San Bernardino.
-And clout.
-Clout.
-Yeah, that's right.
-Let's stop talking.
-I work for a crazy
Polish dentist who's been known
to booze with his patients
before operations
to calm down a little.
-Well, there's nothing wrong
with that.
You all know how it goes.
You buzz in with the correct
answer to the trivia question,
you get three spins.
If you agree with
the correct answer, one spin.
Incorrect answers,
well, no spins, of course.
Okay, let's get right to it,
folks.
Crow's-feet are facial lines
around the eyes
that we get from squinting.
According to a study,
at what age --
Janie?
-40?
-On average,
is it 30, 40, or 50?
Ed?
-Michael?
-40, yeah.
-That is right.
It is 40. It is 40.
Janie gets three spins.
Ed and Michael each get one.
And that's nothing that I have
to worry about at my age, right?
I mean, I'm not a day over 25,
so...
All right, next question.
You probably have
president FDR in your pocket
right now because
his likeness --
-Uh, $50 bill?
-His likeness appears on the
head side of what American coin?
-Slow your roll, buddy.
-Ed.
-Ah, he's just nervous.
-Well, I don't have
any $50 bills in my pocket
right now like Michael, Peter,
so I'm gonna say dime.
-Janie?
-Me too.
-It is the dime.
-Just have fun with it.
-I thought you told your boy
to study his trivia, Bill.
-Those who sailed
in the wooden shoe were Wynken,
Blynken, and --
Ed?
-Nod.
- Nod. Michael?
- Uh, Nod.
-Janie?
-Nod.
-Yes, it's Nod.
That is right.
What member of the wedding party
is responsible for giving
the check to the clergyman?
Michael?
-It's the best man.
-Ed, he says it's the best man.
What say you?
-A pastor really should know
this one, shouldn't he, Peter?
-He should know it.
-I'm going to say the best man.
-Janie.
-Best man.
-Yes, it's the best man.
-Whoo.
-Michael gets three spins.
We'll cozy up with you know who
and see if we can't turn
those spins into big bucks.
-Big bucks.
-Right after this.
-No Whammies.
- And we're out. Back in 60.
-60, okay. Um...
-This is fun, right?
-Yeah, real good.
Um, hey, could -- could I go
make a phone call real quick?
-Oh, phones are prohibited
during tapings.
Standards and practices.
But if you'd like
to stretch your legs or...
-This adrenaline has me itchy.
Do you think I have time
to do a lap?
-Well, you have 60 seconds.
-Todd.
-Oh, thank you.
-Careful.
Whitman.
-Thank you.
-Mm-hmm.
Bill.
-Thank you.
-You're welcome.
-Did I miss the spins?
-Oh, no, ma'am, just in time.
-Here. I remember what you like.
-Oh, thank you, honey.
-You're welcome.
-You're late.
-Don't tell Kauffman.
Some old guy
and his wife over at "Price"
snuck a newspaper
into the audience.
-Did they walk away
with anything good?
-They weren't even contestants.
-All right, team, we're back in
five, four...
-Five, four, three, two.
-Welcome back
to "Press Your Luck."
You know what time it is, folks.
I'd like to introduce you
to my much edgier costar,
the big board.
Now, the big board is filled
with money,
a couple of surprises
here and there,
including a dreamy stay
at the iconic Fairmont Resort
in Hawaii.
But be careful of the Whammies,
because they'll take you
right back down to zero.
Now, remember,
you can pass your spins
at any time during your turn.
The player with the lowest score
after the trivia round
gets to go first.
Michael, that's you.
Oh.
I think I'm ready.
- Hey!
Smile! "Big bucks! Big bucks!
No Whammies!"
- Oh. Right.
Big bucks, big bucks, come on.
Stop!
- $2,000.
Michael, now, do you want to --
you wan to pass your spins,
or do you want to keep going?
-I'll keep going, Peter.
-Okay.
-Come on.
No Whammies.
Big bucks.
Stop!
-Wow.
Another $1,500, Michael.
What do you want to do, Michael?
Do you want to --
you want to go again?
-Keep going.
-Okay, he's going to go.
Let's go, let's go.
Stop! Oh!
-Ah, the Whammy.
-Shit. Fuck.
-Whoops.
Can we say that?
Is that PG?
Can we say that?
-Fuck.
-Can we say "shit" on CBS, Bill?
-I can't fix that in post, boss.
-Okay, we gotta go again.
Let's remind our contestants
to watch their mouths.
-Travis!
-Charles, shut the fuck up.
-Who's Travis?
-Come on, guy, come on.
-All right, resetting again
to the Whammy reaction,
and let's all remember
to watch our language.
Guy? Guy in the middle?
This is daytime.
-Sorry, habit.
-Wash your kids' mouths
with dish soap...
-Taking it again.
-...for less swear words.
-Three, two.
-Tough luck there, Michael,
but you'll get them next round.
For now, you're down to zero.
Okay, Ed, it's your turn to take
on the big, beautiful board.
You ready?
-Well, I am ready for it, Peter.
-Let's go, big bucks.
-Come on,
we want to see some big bucks!
Big bucks! Yeah!
-No Whammies, no Whammies!
Stop!
-We did it last time,
and we can do it again.
And stop!
-Come on, give me big bucks!
Stop!
-Stop!
-Stop!
-And...stop!
Whoo-hoo!
-And now pull into the lead
as we head into our next trip.
Stay tuned.
-And we're out.
That's 90.
Can we get makeup, please?
Makeup for Peter.
-I don't sweat, I glow.
-Bathroom?
-What?
-Yes, I got to move.
-Me too.
This coffee really got me going.
-Yeah, same.
We should all go
to the bathroom.
-We'll be right back...
-Okay, it's right this way.
The men's are on the right,
and ladies --
-Thanks, Sylvia.
-I-I thought you had to go.
-No, I know what you said about
standards and practices and all,
but I'm an idiot,
and in all the rushing around
today and all the hoopla,
I just -- I-I forgot to call
my little girl on her birthday.
-Wow.
-Yeah.
It's 3:30 where she is,
so she must have just finished
cartoons, and, uh...
Please, I'm just kind of
freaking out.
-Oh. I really can't.
The rules, yeah, I know.
-Yeah, yeah.
-But I just --
I wouldn't even ask
if it didn't mean everything.
Imagine if your daddy didn't
call you on your special day.
-Bill found me where they find
all great game-show
personalities --
wearing a mouse costume
on Hollywood Boulevard.
Isn't that right, Rod?
Isn't that right?
-That's correct, Peter.
-See? That is correct.
-Come on, come on.
-Hello. No one is available
to take your call.
Please leave a message
after the tone.
- Uh, you know, hey!
Today's the day.
You need to pick up the phone.
So if you can be close by
the phone, I would really --
-Hey, come on.
-Shit! Fuck me!
I'm sorry. I didn't --
-Oh, um, everyone back to set.
-Nervous tic?
-Oh, I'm quitting smoking.
-Good for you.
Sorry about the Whammy.
-Huh?
-Wha-wha! The Whammy.
-All part of the game, right?
At least I get to go first
this next round.
Bigger prizes, bigger Whammies.
-Enjoy, and big bucks,
as they say.
Well, that certainly was a
sobering 90 seconds, wasn't it?
-Four, three...
-Big smile, smile, smile, smile!
Yeah.
-And we're back with round two,
folks.
Bigger prizes, bigger Whammies.
Now let's get right to it.
Now, the player
with the lowest amount of money
from round one gets to go first.
Michael, that --
-That's me.
-Yes, that is you, Michael.
- All right.
Okay. All right, now.
Let's see those big bucks.
Big bucks!
Stop!
-$4,000 and a spin!
-Gonna keep going. I'm going.
-Okay.
All right, he's gonna go,
he's gonna go.
-Stop!
-$5,000 and a spin!
-Nice.
-Uh, Michael, you want to --
you want to pass,
or you want to keep going?
-Oh, I'm going to keep going.
I'm going.
-Okay, here we go.
-Alright.
Stop!
-$4,000 and a spin!
-Wow!
-Whoo!
-Michael, you're on a roll!
-Again, let's go again.
-Michael, you're up to $13,000.
Now, do you want to --
you want to go again?
-I said again!
-Okay, he wants to go again.
-Stop!
-$16,000, Michael Larson!
What are you thinking, Michael?
That's a lot of money.
-Are we all seeing this?
-I said again.
-Quite a roll he's on.
-You should know better
than to doubt me by now.
-He's really getting up there.
-Lady Luck is on his side.
- Big bucks.
Stop! Whoo!
-I just can't believe this.
Okay, what do you want to do?
-Oh, uh, keep going.
-You -- You want to keep going?
Okay, we're going to --
we're going to keep --
we're going to keep going.
Michael wants to keep going.
-This is what we want, right?
-He's got nerves of steel,
this guy.
-Stop!
-Wow!
-Okay.
-What do you want to do?
-I want to keep going, Peter.
Stop!
-Michael Larson,
that is $19,000.
$19,000, Michael.
-$21,000 is the highest
we've had, right?
-That's if you don't hit
a Whammy.
Michael, I want you
to think about this.
-Fucking pass, man.
-I'm going to press my luck.
I want to keep going.
-Okay, he's -- he's --
he's going to go.
Michael's gonna go.
-Stop. Whoo!
-Holy shit!
-Record, record, record.
Uh, go to the thing.
-Record breaker!
-$24,000 makes you our
biggest winner to date, Michael.
-Okay, so he's a --
he's a record breaker.
-I got to ask you.
-Okay, now pass it.
-Think about this.
$24,000 is a lot of money,
Michael.
Are going to go?
What are you going to do?
Are you done, Michael Larson?
-Don't stop!
Come on, you got this!
-No, no, you're gonna go?
-What's wrong with this guy?
-Well, biggest winner,
biggest loser.
Either way,
I don't write the checks.
Don't tell Kauffman.
-Stop! Whoo!
-$4,000 and a spin.
Michael Larson,
that was terrific.
$28,000!
-Whoo!
Yes, again!
Again, again!
-He's going to go!
-Commercial in 15.
-Tell Junior to bring me Peter.
-In here?
-Where the hell else?
-We'll be right back
to watch Michael Larson
take the name of this game
to heart
right after these messages.
-Four, three, two, one,
and we're out.
That's a two.
-Wow. Hey, hot hands,
that was pretty cool.
-Hey.
Bill wants to talk to you.
-Do you know what for?
-No, I have no idea.
-Bill, is everything good
up there?
-Can you stop smiling just
so I can get in your creases?
-Oh, I'll try.
-All right.
-So dinner tonight, ladies,
on me.
Ed?
-You know, I, uh --
I don't know if our boyfriends
would be too happy about that.
-They're the jealous type,
all of them.
-But, you know,
you make it to $50,000,
I think they could
look the other way.
Yeah, well, easy, then.
Just cancel your plans, then.
-$50,000.
I bet your wife won't mind
you coming home with that, huh?
-Hmm.
-$28,000 begs to differ
with you, Mr. Carruthers.
-Well, Peter,
something is, um...
-What?
-Something's off with him.
-What, you think he's shitty?
-We don't think he's --
-No, no, he's just not playing
the fucking game right.
-He's got a loose nut
or something.
-He's not computing the risks,
Pete.
-Yeah, well, it seems
to be working out pretty
well for him so far.
Besides, what do you
want me to do about it?
I mean, I'm a little rusty,
but...
-Oh, for fuck's sake.
You've got to scare him.
-Well --
-With -- With the chances.
-All right, look, look.
We love the guy, right?
And we want him to go home
a winner, but this is enough.
-All right, can we have
all our contestants back
into places, please?
-Ah!
My shin!
Fucking jerk!
-Oh, shit.
Shit! I'm sorry.
-Three, two...
-And we're back
with an unbelievably exciting,
tense game of "Press Your Luck,"
where Michael Larson's
winnings continue to grow
despite the formidable odds
stacked against him.
Now, Michael, I have seen a lot
of lucky streaks in my day,
but no one, and I mean no one,
has ever been as dumbly brave
as you.
Now, the mathematicians
up in the booth
are giving me six-to-one odds,
Michael.
That means you push it
six more times,
one of them is bound
to be a Whammy.
Now, we'd hate to see you lose
it all, Michael, am I right?
- Go for it, Michael!
-Well, that's one man's opinion.
Michael, what do you want to do?
Do you want to spin
and risk losing it all?
It's a lot of money, Michael.
It's a lot of money.
-What the fuck is going on?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, let --
let me think about it.
Um...
You're right.
You're right, Peter.
That's a lot of money.
-It's a lot of money, Michael.
-Yeah.
I think you got to spin it
to win it.
I'm here to win it,
and I want to play,
and I say
I'm going to go again.
-I'm going to go again.
-Fantastic.
I tried to warn him.
Close your eyes, everybody.
Michael's going streaking.
-Todd.
Give me a walkie.
- Stop!
-Chuck, uh, buddy,
could you switch over to two?
-Okay, Michael,
what are you going to do?
-I'm going to spin again.
-Okay, he's gonna spin.
-Bill?
-I think I got played.
-Stop!
-I'm sorry,
can you say that again?
My volume is really low.
-Damn it, Chuck, just find out
who the fuck this guy is.
-Unfortunately, that's
above my pay grade, Bill.
-Stop!
-Well, then, uh,
we might just have to
change your title, then.
-I got to ask you
to think about this.
It's a lot of money, Michael.
Are you going to go to?
What are you going to do?
Huh, do you want to --
you want to keep going?
-Okay, Todd, I'm driving.
-Oh, I can do it.
-That wasn't meant
to be a conversation.
-Thank you for calling
the audition hotline
for "Press Your Luck."
If you would like to take our
trivia quiz, please press one.
If you would like --
-Fucker.
-And sometimes,
I drive an ice cream truck
during the summer,
when I need to.
Huh?
-Can I help you?
-Oh, Jim.
Hey, how you doing, man?
I'm just, uh...
-Can I...help you?
-Whoo! Whoo!
-Unbelievable.
-Something's wrong.
Don't spiral.
-You think
that he's working alone?
-Is anyone listening to me?
-We don't even know
that he's doing anything at all.
-I mean, m-maybe we --
we t-take a break
while we figure things out.
-Oh, no. You can't do that.
You got to let him play
without interference.
Innocent until proven guilty.
-All right.
-The law remains,
even in the studio.
-You going to go again?
-Earpiece!
-We might have an earpiece.
-Jesus, he's just itchy.
-Let's take a break for tech.
-I'm going to keep going!
Keep going, Peter.
-Yes, now.
And if I find out
that any of you are in cahoots
with this fucking guy,
I will find you.
-Big bucks, come on!
Stop!
-Unbelievable.
More of the force
that is Michael Larson
right after this short break.
-Already?
-And we're out in five,
four, three.
- 45 seconds.
-No Sweat A.C.
-Uh, is this Lyle Roberts?
-The one and only.
What can I do for you?
-Um, this is, uh...
...Bill.
And I'm a clerk
at the Justice Court of Lebanon.
-Okay.
-And, um, I'm calling
because your restraining order
came across my desk
against Michael Larson because
it's about to, um, time out.
And we were just calling to see
if you wanted to re--
renew the charge.
-Oh, already?
Uh, yeah, we just got back
on our feet
after his last Ponzi scheme.
-Sure, sure. Yeah.
We just actually have
a few questions, if that's okay?
-Okay.
-Could you let us know
if he has violated the --
the order to date?
-No, not to my knowledge.
-Okay, great.
And, um, can you, um, remind us
what the initial charge
was for again?
-What did you say
your name was again?
-I beg your pardon?
-Dude, my copy here
says we still got 16 months
that we don't have to
worry about the guy.
Michael, is that you,
you fucking loser?
If I see you again,
man, I'm going to fucking --
-You going to keep that promise,
Michael?
-Huh?
-You said dinner tonight
if you hit 50K.
-Oh, yeah, uh-huh, yeah.
Um, you seem nice, but I don't
know why I said that earlier.
My wife would kill me.
-Don't worry about it,
sweetheart.
You take it all home to her,
hmm.
-Do I need any makeup?
-What's the use?
He's the only one being seen
on-screen.
-He's just a bit of a sweater.
-Do I look like I'm sweating?
Am I sweating now?
- Mnh-mnh.
-All right, please keep it
together, everyone.
-All right, my little bunny.
Come on, smile!
-My mom says hi
and have a good first day.
-Hey, you got your ice cream?
Yeah!
-No, Mom, it's different
this time.
-Patricia!
I'm gonna get your mommy here.
-Ice cream for breakfast?
-Okay.
-You're living the dream.
-All right, here we go.
-...one of my favorite songs
by Waylon Jennings.
-What the fuck?
-Amanda, light up my life.
Okay, Amanda,
what do you want to do?
You're at $4,500.
You have --
-Lily is a veterinarian
from Sherman Oaks.
-That's right.
-Wow, that's an interesting
job, isn't it?
Uh, what's the most
unruly animal
you've ever had in your office?
Cecilia, you're at $750.
You have three spins.
What do you want to do?
-Again.
-Okay.
Oh, Cecilia,
don't go breaking my heart.
Don't break my heart.
No Whammies, no Whammies!
-Stop!
-$3,000 and a spin!
$3,000 and a spin.
$68,500.
How does it feel
to own a network, Michael?
-It feels good.
Another spin would feel
even better.
-Okay, all right.
-Stop!
-You going to go again?
What are you going to do?
-I'm going to go again!
I'm going to press my luck!
Stop!
-T-shirts, really?
-Uh, yeah. First count's full.
We're heading on to
the second episode.
Um, hey, do you think
I could talk to you
about something for a second?
-Later.
-We're out in three, two...
-How much time's left?
-Oh, there you are.
What the fuck you find?
-Watch.
-Do not wander off.
-What? What the fuck?
-Watch, watch.
Hey, Whitman, can you rewind
to the last three spins, please?
-Is this overtime?
-Will you just, please?
I said please.
All right,
go to Michael Larson's close-up.
Now watch his eyes.
Now watch the board.
-Stop! Whoo!
-Okay, next spin.
Slow it down.
Watch his eyes.
Now watch the board.
Watch his eyes.
Celebrating a little
prematurely, don't you think?
And stop.
-Chuck, what the hell
am I seeing here?
-Um...
he's memorized Bill's patterns.
-Memorized the patterns?
-Yes.
-Aren't they random?
-There are five.
-Five?
-Who gives a fuck about
how many patterns --
-More than five, at least!
Bill, what the fuck?
-Whoa, whoa.
Enough. Enough.
The good news is,
is that he's cheating.
Well, he's cheating.
-He's cheating?
-Yeah.
-Yeah.
-Oh, Chuck,
you are one smart cookie.
And that is why
I keep you around.
-I told you he was
a fucking creep.
-Yes, yes, you did.
-You guys,
I'm so sorry about this.
It's just the nature
and the reality of game shows.
Here we are. Have a T-shirt.
For you.
-You got to be kidding me.
I lost my Saturday for this.
-No, thank you.
-Jack.
-Another one.
-Hazel.
-I can wear it to bed, I guess.
-Perfect.
-Keep it.
Hey, blow him up
with a fucking Whammy.
-Yeah, if only
I had the chance.
-Sorry again about that.
-Yeah.
-Say, "No Whammies!"
-No Whammies.
-So lucky.
-Lucky? Well...
Yeah, my take on luck
is that luck
is just a good excuse
to do nothing
and then hope that
an opportunity comes a-knocking.
If you open your eyes
and keep your mind wondering,
you'll find that the best
opportunities just sprout up
in places
that people aren't looking.
Oh, and here's a tip, too.
Stop giving your money
to that place.
What you do is you go to a bank,
you sign up, you cash out,
close down.
-Sign up, cash out, close out.
Bright kids.
I'm going to grab a snack.
I'm burning a lot of calories
up there.
Ed, do you want something?
-No, thanks.
-Sit tight, everyone.
-Thank you.
-The big guys upstairs say the
next episode will begin shortly.
Has anyone seen my Pepto?
-I have not.
-Yeah. It's good.
-...to see it.
-Yeah, it's my favorite.
They have these carne asada
tacos that are extraordinary.
-Oh.
-Yeah, yeah.
So what -- what are -- what are
you doing this weekend?
-I thought you were going to
pick me up on the Bronco.
-Am I going to pick you up?
Yeah, yeah.
-Oh, come on.
-Hello?
-Hey, um, you picked up.
Hey, where the heck is --
-No, I didn't realize you'd
invited the entire, whole class,
um, but it's her birthday,
Patricia.
I should be able to call her.
-No, no. Just, uh...
Well, I've been busy
out of town.
Yeah, you know what, Trish?
I'm actually closing
a big deal right now.
I'm right smack-dab
in the middle of it.
It's going to change everything.
It could change everything
for us.
If you give me --
-No, I know.
-No.
-Susie, phone!
-Oh, baby, Susie!
Oh, my Susie baby!
Sue.
What kind of cake?
Oh, no. You don't like
chocolate, do you?
-I like it now!
It's my favorite!
-No. Oh, well, happy birthday,
my sweet girl.
Oh, you sound so big.
-Hey, I'm not done!
I'm still eating that!
-I miss you.
-I miss you, too, Daddy.
I'll save some cake.
Are you coming over?
-Yeah, no, I, um...
Hey, you know what?
Can you put Mommy back on?
-No, that's mine! Give it back!
-Just for --
Hey, Trish? Hey, baby?
-Moving to places!
-Ah, shit!
-Oh! Oh.
- You scared me.
My gal's a worrier.
-Hmm.
-She, uh, you know,
likes me to check in on her.
-Mi-Michael, where have you --
-Hey, there, Ed.
Hey, Janie.
-Keep heads turning with Timex.
We'll be watching you.
-Ed, have you seen
my grip master?
-No.
-Janie, have you seen it?
Janie?
-What?
-Have you seen my --
Your -- Your what?
-Grip master.
-I'm glad it's gone.
-No, no, no.
I refuse to believe it.
-I don't know what to tell you,
Bill.
He's not cheating.
-He's counting cards.
-It's not blackjack, Chuck.
Anybody could have memorized
five patterns.
-We're back in one.
-So -- So what can we do?
-You ride it out.
It's Michael's show now,
unless he gives up or slips up,
whichever comes first,
then get more patterns.
Who in God's name
said five was enough?
-Well, we -- we didn't have
the budget.
-Might have cost you
less than $65,000.
- Arnie.
-What are you doing?
-Time to call Kauffman.
-No. Are you fucking kidding?
No more calls in or out until
we can get ahead of this thing.
-Can I go to the ladies' room
at least, Bill?
-I don't know.
Can you?
-Whitman, hold.
I'll be right back.
-All right, everyone,
we're gonna hold --
-Okay, um, ideas.
-Well, he slipped up before.
Maybe he'll slip up again.
-Hey, Bill,
Peter wants to talk to you.
-Tell him to go sit on a duck.
-Fresh out of ducks, Billiam.
But I just want to say
thank you for forgetting
the Home Spin today.
If you guys really don't need
me, I can go home for the day.
-Right.
-Let's play.
-Okay, you heard it.
Let's play.
-They say there's a first time
for everything.
Well, this game
is no exception.
This is the first time in the
history of "Press Your Luck"
we won't be finishing
in our allotted time.
This is Hurricane Michael,
an ordinary man from Ohio.
He has, until now,
put the network out of $69,500
with no end in sight.
Now, let's pick up
where we left off,
with Michael winning
and the rest of us wondering
if we'll be working for him
by the end of the day.
-What can I say, Peter?
I'm feeling really good.
-You've still got two spins,
Michael.
You couldn't give
those spins away.
What -- What are you
going to do?
-Again!
-Of course, he's going to go.
Okay.
-Come on, big bucks!
Stop!
-Oh, my...
-Let's go! Let's go! Let's go!
Let's go! Let's go! Let's go!
-He's going, he's going.
He's going.
-What's -- What's wrong?
-That sound means it's time
for our final Home Player Spin.
Now, our lucky home player,
and, Michael,
they are indeed lucky
to be paired with you,
will get whatever amount
you land on.
Now, Michael, why don't you
pick up that card
right there in front of you and
tell us who you're playing for?
-Hmm.
-Who's the lucky guy or gal?
Michael?
-Lyle Roberts from...
Cleveland, Ohio.
-From Ohio!
A couple of Buckeyes!
From one Ohioan to another.
Well, you wouldn't happen to
know Lyle, would you, Michael?
You guys hang out together?
-Ohio is a very big state,
Peter.
-Touch.
Well, Lyle Roberts,
this one is for you.
Okay, let's get it.
-Stop!
-A trip to the five-star luxury
Fairmont Resort, Hawaii.
Lyle Roberts, you will
receive the equivalent of that.
Okay, Michael,
you still got this one spin.
What are you gonna do with it?
-Oh, wait, wait.
-Holding.
-Did somebody move the light?
-The light?
What -- What light?
-There's a light directly
in my eyes.
-No, no.
-Do you see that?
In the middle there.
-Did somebody move the light?
-Nobody moved the light.
The lights are fixed.
-I'm going to take a lap.
-Nobody is leaving.
-This is just about ridiculous.
-We'll get someone
to look at the light.
Nobody move.
-Just get somebody
to look at the light, all right?
-We're not wasting
any more time. Janie!
-What the fuck did he say?
-The light?
-What light?
-Someone get eyes on that.
I just want to get today
over with.
-What did I say?
-Sorry, D,
but I-I've got a crew
who would like to get some sleep
before coming back
to the studio tomorrow.
-That's assuming you all have
jobs to come back to, right?
-Ron!
-It has gone to the dogs.
-I'm, uh -- I'm sorry
she pulled you away
from whatever you were --
-$70,000.
That's like two salaries,
isn't it?
Well, so we got a fucking dud.
Well, I guess that's
the first time
in all the time
we've worked together.
-I guess it only takes one dud
to find a flaw in the system.
Five patterns, Bill?
-Hey, it's not my game,
it's this fucking guy.
-I don't know what to tell you.
Heads are going to roll
for this.
Who let him in?
-Um...
Well, he, uh --
Uh...
-Captain going down
with the ship?
-No, Chuck Turner.
-Oh.
-Chuck, yeah, he -- he -- he's
the one who handles casting.
-Chuck, that's right.
Chuck.
Let's get Chuck up here.
-Right.
-Um, can you, uh...
-You have to go back.
-No sorry. Why?
Because he has nothing
to be sorry for.
-Hey, guys,
I just need it quiet, okay?
We're about a half-hour past
where we should be.
-Who the hell is this guy,
anyway?
You guys are giving him
special treatment.
No, no, we're not.
I bet Junior would love to find
out you let him use the phone.
-Junior, you know what?
I'm out with Janie.
-Whatever.
-What's going on?
-They're fucking with me.
Lyle Roberts.
-Well, who is it?
-Somebody who...
was a real ass to me.
-I'm sure it's just
a coincidence.
-No.
No, it's not.
-Are you doing something wrong?
Just take a deep breath.
-Yeah.
-Most times when I feel
like someone's watching me,
turns out to be my own shadow.
-I don't have eyes on Chuck.
No, we can look for him.
-Junior!
-Does anyone have eyes on Chuck?
-Well...
Oh, I'm gonna do what you said.
I'm gonna take a breath.
-Thank you for your patience,
folks.
Please sit tight
and don't wander off.
-Michael!
-I said please sit tight.
-The phone was taken in
for maintenance.
You must have
a real nice VCR, huh?
Man, but you forgot about
the consequences, Michael.
Careful.
Is this the example that you
want to set for your daughter?
It'd be a real pity if you
got held up here in L.A.
Hmm.
Tell me, Michael.
Who the fuck were you calling,
anyways?
Drive safe, Michael!
Ah.
-Oh, excuse me, sir.
Sir?
Hey!
My truck!
Somebody broke in.
What in the --
Oh, hi.
Sorry to bother you.
Have you been here all day?
-No, I just got called in.
They needed backup.
-Hey.
-Well, my truck --
-You got the call, too?
-Yeah, they sounded
pretty desperate.
-Must be a big scene.
-Yeah.
-Kind of quiet.
-Suspect --
-Suspect --
-Suspect is approaching.
-Suspect is approaching.
-Suspect is approaching.
-Suspect is approaching.
-Kind of quiet.
-Hey, hey, buddy!
Right behind you!
-Hey!
-Remember it all with Iomax,
iodine supplements for memory.
Memorize the patterns
for your favorite game show.
And now your host, Leon Hart.
-All right, folks, we have
a great show for you tonight.
I want to --
Well, hello.
-Oh, shit.
I-I think I got turned around.
-Yet you are right
where you're supposed to be.
Funny how that happens, huh?
Your seat's right there.
-Hello.
-Oh, come on, people.
It's okay.
He doesn't bite.
I think.
Do I know you from somewhere,
Michael?
Not "America's Most Wanted,"
right?
-Boy, I hope not.
-Where you coming in from?
-Uh, Lebanon.
It's a little city in Ohio.
-Capital O-H...
-I-O.
That's right.
-That's a good long ways away
to land here,
gracing our humble stage
tonight,
but no one ever comes
to Hollywood by mistake,
and no one ever calls
from Vegas just to say hello.
What's got you running
from Ohio?
-Uh, well, you know, it's, uh...
It's funny.
Uh...
All I want to do is
have breakfast with my family,
but the only way
that I can do that is if...
I'm on their television set,
if it's tuned to the right
channel, at the right time,
on the right day.
I don't know.
Maybe this time
I've pushed it too far.
I went 3,000 miles away
to get closer to my little girl,
but now it's --
now I'm just 3,000 miles away.
Maybe that's for the best.
The mess I've made.
All these months of hard work,
though,
they -- they were for her.
Trying.
In the only way
this brain knows how to work...
I'm trying.
I think I may have needed
a bit more luck
in this town than I thought.
-You must be doing
something right, son,
because no one ends up
in my chair for no reason.
-My, um -- My Patricia, she --
she just goes gaga over you.
-Well, your Patricia
has got excellent taste.
You know, I --
-Michael!
-Well, if I didn't lose
my job yesterday,
I'm sure as hell going to lose
it today, so thank you for that.
-Suspect is on red leather.
-Sylvia, you found him?
-Yeah. No, I have him.
Um, yeah,
he turned right around.
We're -- We're on our way
back now. Thanks.
Just please, please,
please, for me,
just stay in your seat
until the end of the episode.
-We want Michael!
We want Michael!
- Wow!
Bravo, bravo!
-Chuck's a sucker
for these kind of things.
-Jack is back.
-You're crazy about this guy.
-Hell no.
-They love you, Michael.
They love you.
-Can you turn
the applause light off?
-I'm not pressing the button.
-Just fucking mute it.
-Okay.
-I thought you ran
a tighter ship than this, Bill.
-Well, I thought we took care of
our little ice cream man problem
organically,
but I guess we weren't so lucky.
Ron, welcome to the party, sir.
-Chuck, I'm surprised
you're still with us.
-Bill, what's he talking about?
-Uh, Chuck, we have a problem.
Um, somebody
didn't vet this guy.
Um...
-It's a shame.
-Charles.
I'm -- I'm sorry.
-You guys want to hear
the fucking truth, huh?
-Wait, are we being
fucking idiots?
I mean, this -- this guy's
about to be a national hero.
The little guy who comes
and takes down the man.
I mean, that --
that's a narrative
we should embrace in a big,
fat bear hug.
I mean, if Michael's
making money off us,
we should do the same.
Yeah, we'll --
we'll do it better.
You know, we lean in,
promote the hell
out of this show.
Michael Larson,
the luckiest man in America.
-Yeah, CBS makes
Michael's dreams come true.
-Exactly.
-Oh, you're thinking
like an executive.
-I mean, that -- that's
the American dream, right?
I mean, that's
why people watch game shows.
-Better watch your back, Bill.
Todd's coming for your job.
-Well, after all, I-I taught him
everything he knows.
-Yeah, get me Carl Johnson
at GGT.
Tell him that we are
going to have
bigger ad space
than the Olympics.
-You may have saved my skin
with that one.
-Yeah, now.
-Whoo!
Oh, big bucks.
Stop!
Let's go! Let's go! Let's go!
Let's go, let's go, let's go!
Let's go!
-He's going!
He's going, he's going.
-This is Lyle.
-Sorry, I have the wrong number.
-One second.
Cut that down, Patricia.
Cut that down, please.
Hello?
Patricia.
-Patricia?
-Cut that down, please.
-Wahoo!
-$97,750!
-Michael, do I even need to ask?
-Let's go, baby, let's go.
- Okay.
-Stop!
-Again!
-You just made it all the way
to $100,000, Michael,
more than anyone
in the history of game shows.
-Peter, I never would
have believed --
-Well, believe it, believe it.
Now, Michael, we have
someone special on the phone
who I would imagine is very,
very proud of you.
-Hello?
-Uh, h-hello!
-Hello?
-Yes, am I speaking to
the most beautiful woman
in the world?
-What?
-Patricia, it's -- it's Peter.
-Who?
It's -- It's Peter Tomarken.
-Who?
-Uh, from "Press Your Luck."
-What the fuck?
-Calling you from CBS...
-What is this?
-...in Los Angeles.
-Uh...
-I'm here with -- I'm here with
your husband, Patricia.
-Michael,
what's he talking about?
-Trish, I'm -- I'm on the show.
I'm finally doing it.
I'm winning.
-He's winning. Not only
is he winning, Patricia --
-Jesus, Michael,
what is wrong with you?
You've got to stop.
You're making me
absolutely crazy.
-Let me, uh,
call you back later, Trish.
We can -- We can talk --
-I don't want a TV character.
I want normal.
Sign the papers and move on,
Michael.
You really just don't know
when to stop, do you?
-It seems that we've
lost connection.
Um...
I'm -- I'm sorry.
I-I don't -- I don't --
I don't know what to say.
Um...
Come on, Michael.
Mike.
Michael.
-Fuck you, Peter!
-Yeah, fuck you!
-Excuse me.
Excuse me just a second.
-Hey! Please.
Please sit down.
Sir!
- Fuck you, too!
-Bill, if you're going to use me
as a scapegoat,
I'd like a little warning.
-You should have run that by me.
You're jeopardizing
all your jobs.
-This does not come from me.
I have no idea who would --
You?
-Me? Me?
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
I did exactly what
Junior told me to do.
-Junior, who authorized
that patch?
-I got a fucking note, Bill.
I thought it was you.
-See?
-Fucking circus.
-Okay, okay. It doesn't fucking
matter who made the call.
Let's fix it.
Pretend it never happened.
Sylvia, I need you
to get Michael some water
and back on set.
Are we ordering dinner?
-Uh, don't worry.
-Okay.
You copy?
-Todd, uh, we have a problem.
He's not coming out.
-I want a phone now!
-I'll go get the pastor.
-Todd.
-Uh, no, no, no, no.
This is my show.
I'll deal with him.
-Mike, I know it's been
a hard day for you.
I don't think any of us
could really know the depth
of what you're going through.
- Okay.
Cynthia, what's the word?
-Um, it's Sylvia.
Uh, he's locked himself inside.
-But -- But knowing you,
Michael,
you'll be able to get out
of this one, too.
-I'm a fuck-up.
-Michael, it's Mr. Carruthers.
You are anything but a fuck-up,
my friend.
-I'm here, Mike.
-I thought I could change
for her,
but my worst idea yet.
Should have never come here.
The whole place is a lie.
-Hey, you're doing the best
you can with what you got,
and it seems pretty darn good
to me.
-Ed, you heard her.
She just wanted normal.
-When she fell for you, she
fell for anything but normal.
-Okay.
Michael Larson.
-Hi.
-Oh, boy, you fucked me,
Michael.
No, I guess you know by now
that we know what you're doing.
-Well, what am I doing, then?
- Michael.
-What?
-You memorized the fucking game,
Michael.
-Is that cheating?
Oh, well,
I would just rather get my money
and get on the road, you know?
-Oh, no, I-I understand that.
But, uh, Michael --
Um...
Michael, have a seat.
Um, Michael, there --
there is no money
without finishing the show.
I mean, you must know that.
Listen, you had us squirming
there for a minute or 20,
but, um -- but now we, me, CBS,
we want you to win,
because you're a star.
Oh, yeah, I saw it yesterday,
but I didn't --
I didn't know
it was going to strike me
like a fucking truck today.
But you are a star,
and you're about to be seen
on every television screen
in America.
National hero.
I mean,
they're talking T-shirts,
coffee cups, talk shows.
Michael Larson,
luckiest man in America.
My friend,
you are about to take off,
and -- and we want to be
the wind beneath your wings.
And it all starts with you going
back out there and winning.
-T-shirts?
-Yeah, T-shirts, you name it.
So, Michael, you just
go out there and you push it
until we say stop.
-Mike, is everything okay
in there?
-Um...yeah, I'm just --
we figured it out.
I do want to, um,
talk to her first.
-Of course.
Just take your time.
Get yourself ready,
and we'll see you back onstage.
-Bill.
-Charles.
-Some people are using this
for personal calls.
Here.
-Are you coming up?
-After you.
-Hey, what the hell is this,
gentlemen, Shangri-la?
Fucking television studio.
Let's go, let's go.
We almost got in a little bit
of trouble there, didn't we?
We sure did.
We sure did.
Motherfucker.
-Huh.
-11:00 a.m., here we come.
Okay, uh,
let's get into our places.
It's, uh, time
to make some money.
-That's my cue.
-Be good to our boy out there.
Todd, you want to drive?
-Uh...
-All right.
Make me a drink?
-Guys, the ice cream man
is back.
-Why ice cream man?
-It's because he's
an ice cream man, Ron.
He's a fucking ice cream man.
-Fantastic.
-You got this, Michael!
-We love you, Michael!
- We love you, Michael.
-All right, cozy in, boys.
-Everyone quiet!
-This could be
a profitable night.
-Five, four, three.
-Michael Larson,
the man who cannot be contained.
Well, Michael, here we are.
I think I know the answer,
but I have to ask.
With one spin still on the
board, what are you going to do?
You know what?
I think I'm --
I think that I'm going to
pass my turn to my --
to my good friend Ed Long.
Wow.
-No.
-What?
I thought you -- I thought you
took care of this, Carruthers.
-Son of a bitch!
-Ed, uh, you're up next.
If Michael can do it,
you can do it.
-Well, I'm ready for it, Peter.
-Big bucks, no Whammies!
Big bucks.
And...
-Oh! That's okay.
Janie, you're up.
-Come on, give me big bucks,
big bucks!
No Whammies!
And stop.
-$750. $750 and a spin.
-Whoo!
-Okay, you going to go again,
Janie?
-I'm going to go again, Peter.
-Let's go again.
-It's giving big bucks.
-Michael Larson back in command.
Michael? Janie just passed
her last spin to you, Michael.
You have to spin it
one final time.
- Don't fuck it up, jerk.
Do we have to air it?
-Just once.
-Just once.
-All right, just once.
And then it's dead
and buried for good.
-Okay, let's see
if Michael knows
how to jump off
this speeding train.
Michael, I'm going to
close my eyes.
But you,
please don't close yours!
-Stop!
-Well, yesterday feels like
just 15 minutes ago, Peter.
-Well, you got your church
vans, Ed, but let me ask you,
what are you going to do
with the rest of the money?
Are you going to buy
a bunch of E-cup brassieres?
-Uh, no, I definitely
won't be doing that, Peter.
I'm not sure what I'll do.
I can still hardly believe it.
-Well, believe it, baby.
Let's hope you add to that
today.
Now, our second contestant
is Michael Larson.
Welcome, Michael,
from Lebanon...
-Oh, my goodness.
Who is that?
-Daddy.
-Yeah.
-Oh...
-Come here.
-...I drive an ice cream truck,
but I'm hoping
to make enough money here
so I can take next summer off.
-And who do we have
watching at home
today in Lebanon, Ohio,
Michael?
-That's right, I got
my daughter, Susie, watching.
And --
-Seriously, Trish?
You ready for school?
-I want to watch Daddy.
-I know.
-No, no. We're late.
-You're late for school.
-Let's go.
-Come on.
-Go ahead.
-No fair.
I'm sick, Mom!
-Love you, sweetie.
Have a good day at school.
...to calm down.
Well, everyone needs a drink
before they have
dental surgery.
Wouldn't you agree?
Yes.
Uh, okay, folks,
you know how it goes.
Buzz in with the correct answer
to the trivia question,
you get three spins.
You agree with
the correct answer, one spin.
Incorrect answers,
well, no spins, of course.
All right,
let's get right to it.
What member
of the wedding party
is responsible for giving
the check to the clergyman?
-The best man.
-Michael?
-That's the best man.
-Uh, Ed, he says the best man.
What say you?
-A pastor should know this one,
shouldn't he, Peter?
-Yes, he should know this, Ed.
-I'm going to say best man.
-Janie, is it the best man?
-Yes.
-Yes, it's the best man!
Michael gets three spins.
-Stop!
-$16,000, Michael!
-Whoo!
-$16,000. What are you --
What are you going to --
-Again, again! Come on, now!
-Gonna go.
-All right!
-Listen to me,
I hate to throw you
off your rhythm,
but this is your sixth spin,
Michael.
Now, the people in the booth
are telling me
the forecast is looking Whammy.
-Come on, Michael.
-Stop!
-Oh, my...
Okay, Michael.
Here we go.
Michael, I'm going to
close my eyes,
but you,
please don't close yours!
Stop!
-That is the game!
A washer and dryer
valued at $800.
The unrefuted,
luckiest man in America.
What are you going to do,
Michael?
-I don't know.
I don't know. We'll see.
-We all hope and wish the best
of luck for you, Michael,
you and your --
and your family.
-I understand that yesterday
was your daughter's birthday.
-Yes.
-What happened?
-I didn't have any money
really to buy her anything.
She's -- She'll get
something now, very nice.
-Like perhaps the state
of Tennessee.
And what did you used to do,
Michael?
What kind of work?
-I've been an air-condition--
whoa --
air-conditioning mechanic,
and I drove an ice cream truck
for about 10, 12 years.
But I'm not this summer.
No way!
-Evidently not!
But you have won
at least I think three times
more than anybody's ever won
on this show.
Congratulations.
Spend it wisely.
And get your daughter
a lovely birthday gift.
-Okay, thank you.
-It's been a real treat.
Ed, you're leaving
with $11,516 --