The Perfect Kiss (2018) Movie Script
1
- I'm running late, you know?
- Incredible.
You're always late!
Mom?
You would be late
for your own funeral.
Kind of speaking
illegally here.
Tanya!
- (HORNS BLARING)
- (THUD)
Ugh, Tanya?
- Tanya?
- Yes, Ma?
Something's wrong?
The car is making
some weird noises.
Is something wrong
with the engine?
Tanya?
Ma, I'm hanging up on you now.
Bye!
(UPBEAT POP MUSIC)
No!
(UPBEAT POP MUSIC)
Oh god.
(UPBEAT POP MUSIC)
Sorry.
I wonder what she's up to.
(UPBEAT POP MUSIC)
(FLOWING INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
Call them!
I did.
We need to buy the
penthouse, not just visit
or suck on them like others.
Call them again now!
Okay.
This city is dying.
Everything is for sale
and here we are waiting
like some beggars.
Hi!
Hi, it's Brian
Demerius calling again.
Yes, the penthouse in
the Crystal Towers.
We want to see it
during the day.
Any news from the agent?
I see.
Okay.
Come here.
Hi.
Good to see you finally here.
I must see the
penthouse before dark
to decide if Mr. Demerius
will spend his money on it.
I was in a car
accident, sorry.
She must be
freshly off the boat.
Can I please
borrow your phone?
Thank you.
Oh you called my company.
(UPBEAT INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
Hi, it's Tanya Coba here.
Can you please send
somebody with another key?
The only key.
I do not believe my ears.
She lost the only keys
to my new penthouse?
My father has another
key from the car.
Where is the car?
I don't know.
Ah...
Okay, thank you, bye.
I was in the metro and
I never use the metro
so I didn't check the station.
Are you insane?
Who forgets their car?
Can I have it once again?
Hi, it's Tanya Coba again.
My father can locate the car
through my GPS in my phone.
Well this is not my phone.
It's my client's.
Oh.
Okay.
Hi.
Bye.
Yeah.
Tanya had her first big sale.
15 million dollars, penthouse!
(WOMEN LAUGHING)
Congratulations!
(WOMEN LAUGHING)
(UPBEAT INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
Washington Square?
Washington Square?
(WOMEN LAUGHING)
You cannot tell that
to this generation!
They are wireless!
They do not understand!
(LAUGHING)
It was great.
It was the golden times.
It was the most
beautiful time of my life.
To those times, Barbara.
To those times.
(WOMEN SPEAKING IN
FOREIGN LANGUAGE)
Where did (MUMBLES)?
It's gonna be just a minute.
You are late!
I had to take the metro.
Can you stop please?
Igor is here.
Igor?
I noticed.
Where is Papa?
I don't know!
Drop it now.
Stop asking me
those questions!
(WATER RUNNING)
Tanya is late because
she's working for the most
prestigious real estate
agency, Rick Sallow!
The car is fine, sweetheart.
Here you go.
Thank you.
Except for its pride.
My phone?
Here.
Thanks.
I think your boss was
trying to reach you.
No!
I'm fired.
Oh.
Tanya, come to see us.
Tanya, please come!
Igor changed!
He changed so much!
He's grown up man now!
Yes!
Zach has to go out and
Tanya will go with him.
Okay.
I'm back my love.
Welcome home.
Oh what a nice surprise!
It's been such a long time.
Let me look at you.
It's still you!
(LAUGHING)
Still working for the agency?
We're still here.
We've had to downsize a bit.
Oh really?
But still good right?
Oh yeah.
It's just that (MUMBLES)
really gets more information
for a week at least now.
(LAUGHING)
Go and help Tanya.
Hello?
(UPBEAT POP MUSIC)
Britney, can I
stay at your place?
Again?
What happened?
My mom wants me to
date some French idiot.
He cute?
Who cares?
He's a loser.
(UPBEAT POP MUSIC)
Why not just tell them
that you need to see a client
and then leave for
a couple of hours?
Hello?
Aren't real estate agents
supposed to be working
late hours anyways?
I was officially fired.
So come.
Oh thank you.
Bye.
(UPBEAT INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
(UPBEAT POP MUSIC)
Stay here and be good, okay?
I love you.
Okay.
(UPBEAT POP MUSIC)
(PEOPLE LAUGHING AND
SINGING TO DRAMATIC MUSIC)
Where is Tanya?
Igor, where is Tanya?
You managed to lose her?
Igor?
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
I have lost trust.
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
I'm sorry.
I'm really sorry.
I'm sorry, okay?
I'm sorry.
Igor!
I don't know.
Do something.
I don't know.
We have to go and find her.
I'll go check.
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
He is not normal.
Last night I didn't
even bother coming home
and he didn't care.
But where have you been?
Working.
What do you think?
We had to deliver
to a German client.
(SPEAKS IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE)
But didn't he know?
Of course he knew!
But still.
Is this good?
I love these.
Can I have?
Sure.
Any normal guy would
ask where are you honey?
Where have you been?
But not Tom!
He's so indifferent.
Was he like that when
you were dating him?
I don't remember.
It's been a long time ago.
He was just this guy
with simple needs.
He's simple.
(BABY CRYING)
Maybe you can
simply take him back.
Where's Shamu?
Who?
I wanna live.
I want to create.
I don't want this anymore.
Children are asleep.
Hi, Tanya.
Wow.
I don't want him back.
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
I don't believe it.
Put on your glasses.
(WOMAN EXCLAIMS)
My god, she's boarding
the metro again!
She's boarding the metro
for the second time today.
She's putting
her life at risk!
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
I really can't believe it.
She's doing it.
Look, look.
Yeah.
Are you sure that's her?
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
(CHILD LAUGHING)
(WOMAN EXCLAIMS)
(CHILD LAUGHING)
(PLAYFUL INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
Morning.
Coffee?
Bye!
Thank you.
Any time, sweetie.
(DOOR CLOSES)
I wanted a (MUMBLES).
Coffee?
(WOMAN EXCLAIMS)
Thank you.
Igor was a mistake.
Tanya!
Please come back home.
How did you even find me?
Seriously?
This...
Ha.
Tanya!
Wait, wait, wait!
It belongs to the agency.
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
Search!
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
We have to find it!
Yes.
Cellular!
Here, maybe here!
Yeah.
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
Where is it?
There!
Ah!
(MAN AND WOMAN LAUGHING)
(MAN AND WOMAN KISS)
(FOOTSTEPS WALKING)
I like your running outfit.
Thank you.
It's very original.
Yeah.
Hey, if you need a
breather, there's a good spot
to stretch around the bush.
No, I can't stop.
You feel better
after stretching.
Oh, thank you.
Okay.
Let me guess.
You are running from a lover.
Oh I wish.
Creditors?
Worse.
What could be worse
than death and taxes?
My parents.
They must be in
pretty good shape then.
(LAUGHS) Yeah.
You know I feel like life
is too short and beautiful
to be complaining
about our parents.
I'm not complaining.
Every woman has a complaint.
For you, it's your
parents, while most women
complain about dieting.
Oh.
You got that right.
I mean about dieting
cause if you're a woman
and you want to stay slim,
according to today's standards,
the only way how to eat is
in front of the mirror naked.
Well, as much as I would
love to see that I think
I should probably try and
ask her out on a date first.
Yeah.
(SLOW INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
This is my card.
Great.
So I'll see you tomorrow
at the breakfast place.
Okay.
Okay awesome.
You know, it's such a happy
coincidence that you're
a real estate agent.
My condo, that thing's
been up for sale for
God knows how long now.
Really?
Yeah, it feels like forever.
It doesn't surprise me
but I'm more than happy
to help you.
Great.
Awesome.
By the way, cell
phone's not valid anymore.
I will replace it tomorrow.
Okay.
I'm not that easy
to reach either.
I work in a hospital
as a brain surgeon
so I gotta keep my phone
off at all times in there.
Well I will never disturb you.
I promise.
Home address not valid either
and employer either, so...
Well I'm really glad
you gave me the card then.
Make sure not to lose it.
(LAUGHS) Well, so bye and oh.
(UPBEAT INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
Gotta go.
See you tomorrow.
(UPBEAT INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
(WOMAN LAUGHING)
Thank you.
I'm so happy to see you.
Tom left us!
No!
So sorry.
Said he'll be gone for
four days on a business trip!
Four days?
Okay.
What am I gonna do
with all this house work?
I can't clean or cook.
Who's gonna take care
of my little sweet rads?
Well, you.
Are you out of your mind?
I have to find a nanny.
Did you say that you
were out of a job?
Could you help out
maybe for a bit?
Well my situation has changed.
Has changed.
How so?
So his name is
Dr. Steve Press.
Where did you meet this guy?
When did this happen?
I was running at the park.
At the park.
This park?
Wow.
And he's the best kisser ever!
You kissed him?
In this park!
Been here 10 years,
I've never met anybody.
Wow!
Yeah I know.
You have kids, right?
So it's kind of...
You can at least come
help out for a day.
Just today.
Okay.
Okay.
(SLOW INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
You have no idea who I am.
You never understand me.
You never listen to me.
I told you many times that I
don't like French restaurant.
There's a brain here.
I'm not an animal.
Give me the key.
I'm leaving.
I'm leaving!
Give me the keys.
Why are you laughing at me?
Stop looking at me like this!
You look like a stupid robot!
I'm talking to you, Brian!
Say something!
I'm done.
What?
I'm done!
Oh you're done (LAUGHS).
Take the penthouse.
Take the car.
I'm done.
Brian?
I got the penthouse.
There it is.
Yep.
I only need a power supply
and the device should work.
What?
Power supply for the device.
What are you talking about?
What are you talking
about when our daughter
is unsupervised, not
protected somewhere
under the snow maybe crying?
(CRIES) I don't understand.
You sure you don't
wanna go to your parents?
It's been like three
days you haven't changed.
Why so much concern
about my look?
Because obviously most
people aren't blind.
Well I can't go back there.
I wish I had what you have.
What do I have
that you don't have?
Normal human family.
Ha, family.
Family is supposed to
mean so much to me.
Well, I'll give you a
piece of advice, sweetie.
Think twice before you fall
into your Mr. Perfect Kiss.
Children are overrated.
Believe me.
I know a little
something about it.
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
Where is she going now?
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
Hi.
Hi.
Mom, dad, what are
you doing here?
We found your phone.
No!
Listen, I'm 30 years old
and I've been covering
for you all my life.
You know what?
From now on, I'm not
sacrificing myself
for your stupid mission anymore.
Ha.
Hey.
Hi.
Why did you give
that guy (MUMBLES)?
You don't know what I
have to put up with here.
What was I to do?
Can't live with
my parents anymore.
You're the stupidest
man on earth!
Why don't you just give
me two or three months rent
on the condo and then
you can just live there
until you sell it?
Really?
Thank you.
You're so generous.
Here's the address.
See you there tonight.
(PHONE BEEPING)
I got an emergency
at the hospital.
It must be beautiful
to save lives.
I gotta go.
Oh, do you still have those
Excel lease contracts?
Yeah sure.
I just figured, you know,
I could use it as a template.
Oh, I must have forgotten
them at my friend's house.
I'm sorry.
No worries.
Just bring them over tonight.
I'll see you soon.
Seriously?
I can't believe you people.
Tanya, darling, please!
He's not for real!
Anybody who approaches
me is not for real
except for your Russian idiot.
You should pay
respect to your mother.
Where am I not
paying respect to her?
Don't talk to your
father like that!
Sometimes I really would
wish to get closer to you.
Just to understand how
can you go through life
with no brain whatsoever.
You know why I hate bullies?
They're so despicable.
(DOOR SHUTS)
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
Are you kidding me?
I will call the police.
(POUNDING ON DOOR)
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
My parents locked
me in my room
and Dr. Press is waiting for me.
I cannot get out
of my apartment.
Why is it that all
good things in this life
are bad for you?
Either they're perverse
or makes us gain weight.
Did you drink?
No, not yet.
I'm begging you.
Can you please
come to his place?
This is (MUMBLES)
talking for me.
He wants me to see his condo.
Just call him.
I already did.
He doesn't pick up the phone.
He must be in a surgery.
And what does all
this have to do with me?
Well I forgot the
documents at your place.
So?
Dr. Press is expecting
to get them tonight!
I get it.
Dr. Perfect Kiss.
Exactly.
Dr. Perfect Kiss.
Will you please go there?
I'm scared that if he
finds out what a loser I am
he won't deal with me anymore.
Okay I'll go.
But only if you promise to
babysit my kids every time
Tom goes away.
Thank you, thank you!
Bye.
Yes!
(FOOTSTEPS WALKING)
Hello?
Hello?
Oh.
I'm sorry.
I'm gonna go.
No.
No, no.
Yes, yes, yes.
Come in.
I insist.
No, no.
No.
Yes, yes, yes.
(PHONE RINGING)
Rex Realty, how
can I help you?
Hi, Tanya Coba please.
One moment, sir.
I'm sorry, sir, she's
no longer with us.
Oh, do you know?
(BEEP)
Hello?
Hello?
(UPBEAT ORCHESTRAL MUSIC)
(UPBEAT ORCHESTRAL MUSIC)
(UPBEAT ORCHESTRAL MUSIC)
(UPBEAT ORCHESTRAL MUSIC)
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
Why did they spit on it?
I don't know,
just for good luck.
I thought it was some
kind of new DNA code.
No, they're just coming up
with a new one while you're in.
What about eye recognition
and fingerprints?
Can't help?
No good anymore?
Apparently it's very
difficult to extract
fresh from the body.
Oh.
Hi.
Stranger danger.
I'm not a stranger.
Oh.
Brian Demerius.
Ah, I remember you.
How's your stunning beauty?
Did you buy the condo?
Actually yes.
Good for you.
Good for her.
Good for all of you.
Have a nice life!
It's cold out.
You want a ride?
I'll take you
anywhere you wanna go.
Where I wanna go or
wherever you wanna go?
Cause you know I have a date
and you're kind of in my way.
So bye.
Wait, you have a morning date?
Yes.
Well then it can't be serious.
Is there some kind of
policy that you can't have
a morning date here
that I don't know about?
Well you can't date in
the morning and be serious.
If it's a dinner date...
It wasn't supposed to be a
morning date but I was locked
in my apartment and I
couldn't get out and my...
Did you just say you were
locked in your apartment?
Anyway, it's none of
your business, okay?
Bye.
Would you just let me
give you a ride please?
I don't think so.
I'm good with metro
because now I know how
to buy the ticket.
Bye.
Hey, come on in.
Hi.
How are you?
Good.
Have a seat.
Here.
Go ahead, just have
a seat over here.
Here's the lease form.
Just sign here.
Oh it's freezing.
There.
Great.
Payment?
Right now?
Yeah.
Can I give you a check?
Sure.
No, no, don't write my name.
Don't write my name.
Just write cash, okay?
I can do that?
Yes.
I'm a doctor, okay?
I know what's best.
Cash.
Cash.
Great, thank you.
Don't worry, my sweetest.
I just have to go to
the hospital, okay?
Oh.
I'll see you soon.
Okay.
Okay.
Who's this guy?
I wonder, this Steve Press.
What?
Dr. Steve and Tanya Press.
(SINGING)
(HUMMING)
oh!
Boo, boo!
Oh.
Oh.
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
Igor!
What are you doing here?
Did my parents send you?
Do they think I'm stupid?
Oh!
I own this place.
This is my castle.
This is my home!
This is my lease!
You have no right to be here!
Show me the lease.
What?
Show me the lease.
I can't.
Here.
What's wrong with you?
Oh.
I can't believe it.
Tearing apart my stuff.
Oh you're even a bigger
loser than I thought!
What do you want?
You have no lease.
Fire the lease.
(SLOW INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
Don't touch me!
I'm sorry.
(WOMAN CRYING)
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
Watch out.
It arrived this morning.
Already open it up?
No.
You open it.
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
Comrades, the most
difficult economic situation,
much important decrease of
jobs that occurred in your area
in the past two, is that
supposed to be English?
Who cares?
Just read it.
We announce you that we are
closing your operational cell.
Decision is final
and unrevocable.
We are ordering to
immediate return
of all un-destroyed evidence.
What about my inventions?
Oh my god.
The teddy bear with the
camera inside the bow tie.
Oh my!
We are declared destitute.
With no profile station
in Paris, France.
(MAN AND WOMAN LAUGHING)
Always obey the motherland!
(MAN AND WOMAN SPEAKING
IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE)
(UPBEAT INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
So sorry for that.
Such a great dog.
Sorry for all that perfect kiss.
Such a great dog.
Oh I'm sorry for your lease.
I'm so sorry.
I'm sorry for your lease, too.
Oh you do speak English?
Good for you.
It's him.
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
Got him!
Would you get off of me?
What is this?
Who are you?
Oh you live here.
Yeah I live here.
Would you stop?
Stop it.
He lives here.
Do you have a lease?
What?
I don't need a lease.
I live here.
I'm calling the police
on you two right now.
No, don't call the police, no.
Are you insane?
Don't touch me!
You lost your minds?
No.
I know you from the pictures.
What?
You look good.
You're crazy.
No.
You're actually crazy.
(LAUGHING) No.
Dr. Steve Press.
What an asshole this guy is.
You know him?
Yeah we met in the park.
Oh me too.
He likes those big
juicy ladies like me.
You're way too skinny.
Oh!
Hey what's the matter?
I got fat!
You know what?
I should call the police.
No, no, no!
Sorry.
I hate cleaning.
Might be pregnant.
What?
Okay you can stay.
But can you clean?
Can you cook?
Okay you'll clean and you cook.
I have a shirt just like that.
Actually this is yours.
Can I keep it?
I mean I look way better
in it than you do but sure.
Thank you.
Oh don't forget that vase.
It's disgusting.
You know what?
This might work out after all.
Do you have any detergent?
How do you live in such a mess?
Don't worry about it, baby.
You know what?
Come over here.
Come see the doctor.
I'll give you a
check-up (LAUGHS).
Beautiful ladies, beautiful!
You got this.
Think about being juicy!
Come on you can do it!
Alright love it!
Perfect squats, perfect
form, loving it ladies!
Loving it!
Come on!
Yeah, get low, get
low, perfect, perfect.
Really feel it in your core
and in your gluteus
maximus, right?
No keep it going, keep it going!
You came here to get fit!
Come on, let me see it!
Let me hear it!
One!
No, I'm not hearing it ladies.
Scream it!
Two, let's go!
Three!
Three!
Feel it really hard.
Feel it in your stomach!
Five!
In your chest ladies!
Six!
In your chest!
Seven.
Let's go, woo!
That's it.
Perfect formation.
Perfect formation.
Come on.
Absolutely let's go.
Let's see what you got.
Come on.
Hit a squat.
Hit a squat.
Let's go, let's go.
Oh, you got it.
You know what you're doing.
Come on. Don't be shy.
Let's go baby.
Come on, hey.
Hey, what is this?
What is this?
I say stop?
Did I say stop?
Come on ladies.
It's cold out here.
Keep yourself warm!
Come on.
Woo!
Tanya, Tanya!
I love you!
I love you, Tanya!
We're together.
Oh no.
No.
Ah, no, no!
I don't want!
No!
Come on.
(MAN EXHALING)
Come on.
Hi.
No.
This right here?
Here, all this?
These are mine.
Just an apple.
You see it starts
with an apple.
Then it's a whole damn turkey.
I'm not having it.
Geez.
Don't call me names.
I have to find us work.
We have to eat!
What do you think
this is, a free ride?
March over to the kitchen.
Place is a mess!
Come on.
Back then when
we were younger
And I spent all of
my summers with you
In the heat of the sun
just with you my darling
Through the fields
of innocent love
We shared dreams
watched as they go
Time moved on
We belong
To an eternity
Carry this
Will you carry
this memory of me
Carry this
Will you carry
this memory of me
We've made a million steps
I wouldn't trade the
world for these moments
(MAN CRYING)
(SLOW INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
(MAN LAUGHING)
(MAN BREATHING)
What'd you want?
I need somebody.
How much?
Huh?
Well, my situation has
changed and I need money.
How much do you offer
for babysitting?
Really?
Can you come over now?
Well sure.
Thank you.
In the heat of the
sun just with you
My darling through the
fields where we felt strong
At last
Now I just want
to see your eyes
To keep a dream alive
By your side to fall in
love with you over again
Carry this
Will you carry
this memory of me
Carry this
Will you carry
this memory of me
We made a million mistakes
I wouldn't trade the
world for this moment
Carry this
Will you carry
this memory of me
Carry this
Will you carry
this memory of me
We made a million mistakes
I'd do it all again
(DOOR SHUTS)
What happened here?
Oh, oh, oh!
(MAN CRYING)
It's hard!
I'm sorry.
Britney left me.
Yeah for a
business trip right?
No, forever.
What?
(DISHES CRASHING)
Wake up the kids!
(MAN EXHALING)
Don't tell anybody about this.
(MUMBLES)
Okay.
Yep.
She's gone.
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
You know I'm still wondering
how we're gonna let Tanya
know that we've been
moving to Paris.
Don't worry.
Sharka told me she has a plan.
She used to be our best agent.
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
(MAN LAUGHING)
Sir, sir!
My train's leaving
from 7:30 to 8:30, hon.
I know.
I was thinking you're
doing so much for humanity
and you know, this is
potassium, home-made.
Thank you.
I only eat biological though.
It's organic.
Full bag of it.
Oh wow, thank you.
I am a big fan.
Is that so?
Yeah.
Arnold.
Sharka.
Nice to meet you.
Nice to meet you (LAUGHS).
Alright, see you later.
(KIDS LAUGHING)
Oh.
Yeah.
(KIDS LAUGHING)
Coffee?
No thanks.
(KIDS LAUGHING)
Can you please stop
crying already?
(MAN CRYING)
Okay, did you call her?
Yeah.
Did you call her work?
(MAN CRYING)
How can you eat?
I need energy!
I need energy!
You know what?
She told me that she's
working with some German.
Give me your phone.
Give me your phone.
If I can fool the receptionist,
she can put me through.
Is that her work?
I'll try, okay?
(SPEAKS IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE)
It's working.
(SPEAKS IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE)
I will call later.
(SPEAKS IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE)
(SLOW INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
She's not there.
Not yet.
Actually not at all.
She left me.
I'm not good enough for her.
Oh well, maybe.
You're not helping.
You're not helping.
Sorry.
(MAN CRYING)
(DOOR SQUEAKING)
What's this?
Give me that bar.
Is that my shirt?
Get out of my face.
Go.
Get out of my face.
Where is it?
Where is what?
My phone.
Well it's gone now.
What do you mean
it's gone now?
That was a gift from Tom.
Well if it was a gift from
Tom then it's even better
at the pawn shop then.
Ah, ah, ah!
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
Hey.
Hi.
How are you doing?
Fine.
Homemade for you.
Organic?
Of course.
Here.
Thank you.
Is everything alright?
Everything's perfect.
I'm making now (MUMBLES).
Yeah I can tell.
Really?
Mm hmm.
So see you tomorrow?
Absolutely.
Okay bye.
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
I made it.
Ah!
I made it.
Ah!
What happened to her?
I got the job interview.
They wanna see me.
I made it!
Congrats.
Thank you.
You gonna start paying
for your own food now?
Here I'm killing myself to
get you the best in the west
and you do nothing but gaming.
Oh, will you help me prepare?
Please, please.
Pretty please.
Maybe I'm the best
coach in this city.
I knew it.
But if we're doing this,
we're doing it my way.
Okay.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Ah!
I'm so good.
So good.
- You're punctual.
- I'm punctual.
- You're reliable.
- I'm reliable.
- You're enthusiastic.
- I'm enthusiastic.
Work well in teams.
I work well in teams.
- You're punctual.
- I'm punctual.
- You're reliable.
- I'm reliable.
You're enthusiastic.
I can't anymore!
You work well in teams.
You're not working
hard, come on.
Punctual, reliable.
Enthusiastic, work
well in teams.
Punctual, reliable.
Enthusiastic, work
well in teams.
Keep it going.
You're punctual.
I'm punctual.
- You're reliable.
- I'm reliable.
You're enthusiastic.
I have cramps!
You work well in teams!
Well in teams.
Come on, this is terrible.
Come on.
What?
This is terrible.
This sucks.
Am I right?
You're doing it right but
your legs are so skinny.
Forgot about my legs!
I have to get this job!
He's right.
Men love women's legs.
What are you doing here?
He's my stalker!
Don't talk to him like that.
He's the new owner.
Oh well, it shows
how superior we are
cause women, they don't care
about men's legs at all.
Arnold, did you
notice the new equipment
that I purchased over
there for the lower half?
Are you suggesting that my
butt isn't good enough for you?
I am merely suggesting to
Arnold that he make good use
of the new equipment.
Every time I see you I
would like to slap you!
Ha, ha, ha.
Okay?
I'm reliable.
You're what?
(UPBEAT ROCK MUSIC)
I can work under pressure.
- Yeah you can!
- I can!
- You're reliable!
- I'm reliable!
- You're punctual!
- I'm punctual!
- Work well in teams!
- I work well in teams!
- You're reliable! - I'm reliable!
- You're punctual! - I'm punctual!
- You work well in teams!
- I work well in teams!
- You got this! - I got this!
- You're good! - I'm good!
- You're punctual!
- I'm very good.
You're reliable!
She works well in teams!
I work well in teams!
You're enthusiastic!
Yeah!
- Come on!
- Come on!
You got this!
Punctual, reliable,
enthusiastic, work well in teams.
Punctual.
Punctual, reliable,
enthusiastic, work well in teams.
Punctual, reliable,
enthusiastic, work well in teams.
You're punctual!
You're reliable!
She works well in teams!
You're so good.
I think I'm ready.
- You got this.
- I got this.
- You're ready.
- Thank you.
- Yeah.
- Thank you.
Yeah.
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
Yes!
Somebody left
groceries like this!
Again.
Where is (MUMBLES)
buying all this stuff?
Is it vegetarian?
Looks amazing.
Do you know what this is?
It doesn't even
have a label on it.
Oh, this one has a label.
The cell is shut down.
The agency calls us to Paris.
Is this for you?
Paris!
No!
No?
No, no.
(SPEAKS IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE)
(SPEAKS IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE)
No, no.
Okay.
(MAN SPEAKS IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE)
Hi.
Bye!
Okay we can do it.
(MAN CRYING)
15 January, perfect.
I'm reliable.
I'm punctual.
I'm very professional.
Sorry.
(BABY CRYING)
Very professional.
(PHONE RINGING)
I'm reliable.
I'm punctual.
(BABY CRYING)
I'm very professional.
(PHONE RINGING)
Hello?
I'm reliable.
And I am a stupid, despaired
loser Britney Greenburg.
Oh Britney.
Mrs. Tanya Coba?
Yes, here.
Wait a minute.
(WOMAN CRYING)
I have your kids.
Listen.
Mrs.!
Yes, they're here.
Mrs.!
Yes.
Well I can't.
Yes, I'm coming.
(BABY CRYING)
I can't talk right now but
can we meet at one o'clock
in the breakfast place?
Yes?
Perfect!
I'm so happy.
Okay bye.
I'm reliable.
I'm punctual.
(BABY CRYING)
Hello.
Forget it.
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Let's go.
Let's go.
Listen to me.
No, you listen to me.
I don't know you.
I don't need your help.
I don't need your pity.
I don't need your nothing, okay?
Bye.
You need this job.
No, I don't need this job.
Okay?
Your ruined my day.
You ruined my dream.
You have children.
No, you've got it all wrong.
Bye.
Tanya, please.
Take it and go.
Go, go.
Tanya, please, come on.
(BABY CRYING)
Get it, go.
Go.
Ah!
No, I wanna make things right.
Okay?
I can't live without you.
I messed up.
I wasn't putting you
first and I just hope
you can forgive me.
I don't know if I can.
But after all, it is how
we repair our mistakes
that define us in
each other's eyes.
Will you re-marry me?
I will.
Yeah?
(MAN SPEAKS IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE)
Ooh
(SLOW INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
Let there be Christmas
Let there be joy
And let the light shine
On the ones you need most
Let there be Christmas
So merry and bright
Let all the children
Be in safe hands tonight
Walk among
Please and my only please
Please Mr. Santa
You don't know the
people I would need
Oh no no
Leave a message.
Tanya Coba, thank you.
(PHONE BEEPS)
Please, Tanya.
I just wanna have a conversation
where there's just peace
and quiet between us.
Please, I'll send a car tonight.
I just wanna talk to you.
(SLOW INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
Ooh
No, no, no
(VACUUM RUNNING)
Who are you?
Ah.
I...
Cleaning service.
And who are you?
Hi, cleaning services.
Oh no you're not.
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
So I fell for this
guy and he wasn't real.
And then we came here and we
didn't have anywhere else to go
and we didn't know
you were living here.
I'm so sorry.
So this is my story.
That's quite a story.
It really is.
Igor.
I'm sorry.
It's alright, darling.
Nothing could be worse
than flying in the backseat
from Miami in an
economical class.
Oh.
Anyway.
(SLOW INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
This Brian keeps calling
me and I'm exhausted.
I don't know what to do anymore.
Every time I feel this hope
it turns out to be wrong.
(SLOW INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
I think my mom is right.
I'm pathetic.
Should go back home
to my parents' house.
Don't do that.
That sounds like the
worst idea in the world!
Believe an old lady, darling.
You know sometimes we make
mistakes in this life.
But that shouldn't stop
us from living our lives,
from being brave and following
our hopes and our dreams.
So go!
Go get ready!
Follow this man.
He sounds really
nice, doesn't he?
So you think I should...
Call him?
I think you should
take a chance.
(UPBEAT INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
If you don't take a chance,
you don't know what you'll
have missed, so go.
Go and get your nice
dress on and let's see you
all partied up.
Yes and you can finish
the dusting please.
The place is a mess!
(UPBEAT INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
I'm tongue tied
by your loose
By it feels right
I don't need no excuse
Cause I know you're mine
Say that you will stay
That you haven't
ever felt this way
Looking in your direction
I know you're feeling
something between us
You are my obsession
I'm in too deep
lost in a dream
Looking in your direction
I know you're feeling
something between us
You are my obsession
I'm in too deep
lost in a dream
Perfect date
Perfect lips
Falling into perfect bliss
Looking in your direction
I know you're feeling
something between us
You are my obsession
I'm in too deep
lost in a dream
Looking in your direction
I know you're feeling
something between us
You are my obsession
I'm in too deep
lost in a dream
(FOOTSTEPS WALKING)
Did Mr. Demari
move in recently?
Yes, Madame.
Well, no, Madame.
Actually it's because the other
madame recently moved out.
To the penthouse?
Yes, I've heard
something like that.
Yeah.
Oh by the way, dinner
will be slightly delayed.
We have new staff but they're
very highly recommended.
Okay.
(SLOW INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
(SLOW INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
Sorry.
Absolutely beautiful.
Just like you.
Listen I asked you here...
Brian, I have to
tell you something.
No, just let me finish please.
Otherwise I'll never get
the courage to tell you.
(SLOW INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
From the moment that
I laid eyes on you,
I knew that you were different,
that you were special.
You mean awkward.
(LAUGHS) Maybe a
little bit of that, too.
But I couldn't stop
thinking about you
and I can't stop
thinking about you.
And yes, I am a successful man
but success doesn't
necessarily mean happiness.
(SLOW INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
Tanya, the feeling that
I have when I am with you
makes me the happiest
man on the planet
and I never, ever, ever
wanna stop feeling that.
(SLOW INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
And I know that you have
children and a boyfriend.
Well, there's been a
huge misunderstanding here.
What sort of misunderstanding?
You see, I don't
have children.
And I don't have a boyfriend.
You don't?
No.
Really?
Yes.
That really makes me the
happiest man on the planet.
So it would be
okay if I did this?
(FLOWING ORCHESTRAL MUSIC)
That would be really
absolutely okay.
Let's do it again.
(UPBEAT INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
I'm hungry.
Hungry?
(UPBEAT INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
I got new kitchen staff, so...
(UPBEAT INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
(UPBEAT INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
(SLOW INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
Ah!
(UPBEAT POP MUSIC)
(UPBEAT POP MUSIC)
(UPBEAT POP MUSIC)
- I'm running late, you know?
- Incredible.
You're always late!
Mom?
You would be late
for your own funeral.
Kind of speaking
illegally here.
Tanya!
- (HORNS BLARING)
- (THUD)
Ugh, Tanya?
- Tanya?
- Yes, Ma?
Something's wrong?
The car is making
some weird noises.
Is something wrong
with the engine?
Tanya?
Ma, I'm hanging up on you now.
Bye!
(UPBEAT POP MUSIC)
No!
(UPBEAT POP MUSIC)
Oh god.
(UPBEAT POP MUSIC)
Sorry.
I wonder what she's up to.
(UPBEAT POP MUSIC)
(FLOWING INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
Call them!
I did.
We need to buy the
penthouse, not just visit
or suck on them like others.
Call them again now!
Okay.
This city is dying.
Everything is for sale
and here we are waiting
like some beggars.
Hi!
Hi, it's Brian
Demerius calling again.
Yes, the penthouse in
the Crystal Towers.
We want to see it
during the day.
Any news from the agent?
I see.
Okay.
Come here.
Hi.
Good to see you finally here.
I must see the
penthouse before dark
to decide if Mr. Demerius
will spend his money on it.
I was in a car
accident, sorry.
She must be
freshly off the boat.
Can I please
borrow your phone?
Thank you.
Oh you called my company.
(UPBEAT INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
Hi, it's Tanya Coba here.
Can you please send
somebody with another key?
The only key.
I do not believe my ears.
She lost the only keys
to my new penthouse?
My father has another
key from the car.
Where is the car?
I don't know.
Ah...
Okay, thank you, bye.
I was in the metro and
I never use the metro
so I didn't check the station.
Are you insane?
Who forgets their car?
Can I have it once again?
Hi, it's Tanya Coba again.
My father can locate the car
through my GPS in my phone.
Well this is not my phone.
It's my client's.
Oh.
Okay.
Hi.
Bye.
Yeah.
Tanya had her first big sale.
15 million dollars, penthouse!
(WOMEN LAUGHING)
Congratulations!
(WOMEN LAUGHING)
(UPBEAT INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
Washington Square?
Washington Square?
(WOMEN LAUGHING)
You cannot tell that
to this generation!
They are wireless!
They do not understand!
(LAUGHING)
It was great.
It was the golden times.
It was the most
beautiful time of my life.
To those times, Barbara.
To those times.
(WOMEN SPEAKING IN
FOREIGN LANGUAGE)
Where did (MUMBLES)?
It's gonna be just a minute.
You are late!
I had to take the metro.
Can you stop please?
Igor is here.
Igor?
I noticed.
Where is Papa?
I don't know!
Drop it now.
Stop asking me
those questions!
(WATER RUNNING)
Tanya is late because
she's working for the most
prestigious real estate
agency, Rick Sallow!
The car is fine, sweetheart.
Here you go.
Thank you.
Except for its pride.
My phone?
Here.
Thanks.
I think your boss was
trying to reach you.
No!
I'm fired.
Oh.
Tanya, come to see us.
Tanya, please come!
Igor changed!
He changed so much!
He's grown up man now!
Yes!
Zach has to go out and
Tanya will go with him.
Okay.
I'm back my love.
Welcome home.
Oh what a nice surprise!
It's been such a long time.
Let me look at you.
It's still you!
(LAUGHING)
Still working for the agency?
We're still here.
We've had to downsize a bit.
Oh really?
But still good right?
Oh yeah.
It's just that (MUMBLES)
really gets more information
for a week at least now.
(LAUGHING)
Go and help Tanya.
Hello?
(UPBEAT POP MUSIC)
Britney, can I
stay at your place?
Again?
What happened?
My mom wants me to
date some French idiot.
He cute?
Who cares?
He's a loser.
(UPBEAT POP MUSIC)
Why not just tell them
that you need to see a client
and then leave for
a couple of hours?
Hello?
Aren't real estate agents
supposed to be working
late hours anyways?
I was officially fired.
So come.
Oh thank you.
Bye.
(UPBEAT INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
(UPBEAT POP MUSIC)
Stay here and be good, okay?
I love you.
Okay.
(UPBEAT POP MUSIC)
(PEOPLE LAUGHING AND
SINGING TO DRAMATIC MUSIC)
Where is Tanya?
Igor, where is Tanya?
You managed to lose her?
Igor?
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
I have lost trust.
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
I'm sorry.
I'm really sorry.
I'm sorry, okay?
I'm sorry.
Igor!
I don't know.
Do something.
I don't know.
We have to go and find her.
I'll go check.
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
He is not normal.
Last night I didn't
even bother coming home
and he didn't care.
But where have you been?
Working.
What do you think?
We had to deliver
to a German client.
(SPEAKS IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE)
But didn't he know?
Of course he knew!
But still.
Is this good?
I love these.
Can I have?
Sure.
Any normal guy would
ask where are you honey?
Where have you been?
But not Tom!
He's so indifferent.
Was he like that when
you were dating him?
I don't remember.
It's been a long time ago.
He was just this guy
with simple needs.
He's simple.
(BABY CRYING)
Maybe you can
simply take him back.
Where's Shamu?
Who?
I wanna live.
I want to create.
I don't want this anymore.
Children are asleep.
Hi, Tanya.
Wow.
I don't want him back.
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
I don't believe it.
Put on your glasses.
(WOMAN EXCLAIMS)
My god, she's boarding
the metro again!
She's boarding the metro
for the second time today.
She's putting
her life at risk!
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
I really can't believe it.
She's doing it.
Look, look.
Yeah.
Are you sure that's her?
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
(CHILD LAUGHING)
(WOMAN EXCLAIMS)
(CHILD LAUGHING)
(PLAYFUL INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
Morning.
Coffee?
Bye!
Thank you.
Any time, sweetie.
(DOOR CLOSES)
I wanted a (MUMBLES).
Coffee?
(WOMAN EXCLAIMS)
Thank you.
Igor was a mistake.
Tanya!
Please come back home.
How did you even find me?
Seriously?
This...
Ha.
Tanya!
Wait, wait, wait!
It belongs to the agency.
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
Search!
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
We have to find it!
Yes.
Cellular!
Here, maybe here!
Yeah.
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
Where is it?
There!
Ah!
(MAN AND WOMAN LAUGHING)
(MAN AND WOMAN KISS)
(FOOTSTEPS WALKING)
I like your running outfit.
Thank you.
It's very original.
Yeah.
Hey, if you need a
breather, there's a good spot
to stretch around the bush.
No, I can't stop.
You feel better
after stretching.
Oh, thank you.
Okay.
Let me guess.
You are running from a lover.
Oh I wish.
Creditors?
Worse.
What could be worse
than death and taxes?
My parents.
They must be in
pretty good shape then.
(LAUGHS) Yeah.
You know I feel like life
is too short and beautiful
to be complaining
about our parents.
I'm not complaining.
Every woman has a complaint.
For you, it's your
parents, while most women
complain about dieting.
Oh.
You got that right.
I mean about dieting
cause if you're a woman
and you want to stay slim,
according to today's standards,
the only way how to eat is
in front of the mirror naked.
Well, as much as I would
love to see that I think
I should probably try and
ask her out on a date first.
Yeah.
(SLOW INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
This is my card.
Great.
So I'll see you tomorrow
at the breakfast place.
Okay.
Okay awesome.
You know, it's such a happy
coincidence that you're
a real estate agent.
My condo, that thing's
been up for sale for
God knows how long now.
Really?
Yeah, it feels like forever.
It doesn't surprise me
but I'm more than happy
to help you.
Great.
Awesome.
By the way, cell
phone's not valid anymore.
I will replace it tomorrow.
Okay.
I'm not that easy
to reach either.
I work in a hospital
as a brain surgeon
so I gotta keep my phone
off at all times in there.
Well I will never disturb you.
I promise.
Home address not valid either
and employer either, so...
Well I'm really glad
you gave me the card then.
Make sure not to lose it.
(LAUGHS) Well, so bye and oh.
(UPBEAT INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
Gotta go.
See you tomorrow.
(UPBEAT INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
(WOMAN LAUGHING)
Thank you.
I'm so happy to see you.
Tom left us!
No!
So sorry.
Said he'll be gone for
four days on a business trip!
Four days?
Okay.
What am I gonna do
with all this house work?
I can't clean or cook.
Who's gonna take care
of my little sweet rads?
Well, you.
Are you out of your mind?
I have to find a nanny.
Did you say that you
were out of a job?
Could you help out
maybe for a bit?
Well my situation has changed.
Has changed.
How so?
So his name is
Dr. Steve Press.
Where did you meet this guy?
When did this happen?
I was running at the park.
At the park.
This park?
Wow.
And he's the best kisser ever!
You kissed him?
In this park!
Been here 10 years,
I've never met anybody.
Wow!
Yeah I know.
You have kids, right?
So it's kind of...
You can at least come
help out for a day.
Just today.
Okay.
Okay.
(SLOW INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
You have no idea who I am.
You never understand me.
You never listen to me.
I told you many times that I
don't like French restaurant.
There's a brain here.
I'm not an animal.
Give me the key.
I'm leaving.
I'm leaving!
Give me the keys.
Why are you laughing at me?
Stop looking at me like this!
You look like a stupid robot!
I'm talking to you, Brian!
Say something!
I'm done.
What?
I'm done!
Oh you're done (LAUGHS).
Take the penthouse.
Take the car.
I'm done.
Brian?
I got the penthouse.
There it is.
Yep.
I only need a power supply
and the device should work.
What?
Power supply for the device.
What are you talking about?
What are you talking
about when our daughter
is unsupervised, not
protected somewhere
under the snow maybe crying?
(CRIES) I don't understand.
You sure you don't
wanna go to your parents?
It's been like three
days you haven't changed.
Why so much concern
about my look?
Because obviously most
people aren't blind.
Well I can't go back there.
I wish I had what you have.
What do I have
that you don't have?
Normal human family.
Ha, family.
Family is supposed to
mean so much to me.
Well, I'll give you a
piece of advice, sweetie.
Think twice before you fall
into your Mr. Perfect Kiss.
Children are overrated.
Believe me.
I know a little
something about it.
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
Where is she going now?
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
Hi.
Hi.
Mom, dad, what are
you doing here?
We found your phone.
No!
Listen, I'm 30 years old
and I've been covering
for you all my life.
You know what?
From now on, I'm not
sacrificing myself
for your stupid mission anymore.
Ha.
Hey.
Hi.
Why did you give
that guy (MUMBLES)?
You don't know what I
have to put up with here.
What was I to do?
Can't live with
my parents anymore.
You're the stupidest
man on earth!
Why don't you just give
me two or three months rent
on the condo and then
you can just live there
until you sell it?
Really?
Thank you.
You're so generous.
Here's the address.
See you there tonight.
(PHONE BEEPING)
I got an emergency
at the hospital.
It must be beautiful
to save lives.
I gotta go.
Oh, do you still have those
Excel lease contracts?
Yeah sure.
I just figured, you know,
I could use it as a template.
Oh, I must have forgotten
them at my friend's house.
I'm sorry.
No worries.
Just bring them over tonight.
I'll see you soon.
Seriously?
I can't believe you people.
Tanya, darling, please!
He's not for real!
Anybody who approaches
me is not for real
except for your Russian idiot.
You should pay
respect to your mother.
Where am I not
paying respect to her?
Don't talk to your
father like that!
Sometimes I really would
wish to get closer to you.
Just to understand how
can you go through life
with no brain whatsoever.
You know why I hate bullies?
They're so despicable.
(DOOR SHUTS)
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
Are you kidding me?
I will call the police.
(POUNDING ON DOOR)
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
My parents locked
me in my room
and Dr. Press is waiting for me.
I cannot get out
of my apartment.
Why is it that all
good things in this life
are bad for you?
Either they're perverse
or makes us gain weight.
Did you drink?
No, not yet.
I'm begging you.
Can you please
come to his place?
This is (MUMBLES)
talking for me.
He wants me to see his condo.
Just call him.
I already did.
He doesn't pick up the phone.
He must be in a surgery.
And what does all
this have to do with me?
Well I forgot the
documents at your place.
So?
Dr. Press is expecting
to get them tonight!
I get it.
Dr. Perfect Kiss.
Exactly.
Dr. Perfect Kiss.
Will you please go there?
I'm scared that if he
finds out what a loser I am
he won't deal with me anymore.
Okay I'll go.
But only if you promise to
babysit my kids every time
Tom goes away.
Thank you, thank you!
Bye.
Yes!
(FOOTSTEPS WALKING)
Hello?
Hello?
Oh.
I'm sorry.
I'm gonna go.
No.
No, no.
Yes, yes, yes.
Come in.
I insist.
No, no.
No.
Yes, yes, yes.
(PHONE RINGING)
Rex Realty, how
can I help you?
Hi, Tanya Coba please.
One moment, sir.
I'm sorry, sir, she's
no longer with us.
Oh, do you know?
(BEEP)
Hello?
Hello?
(UPBEAT ORCHESTRAL MUSIC)
(UPBEAT ORCHESTRAL MUSIC)
(UPBEAT ORCHESTRAL MUSIC)
(UPBEAT ORCHESTRAL MUSIC)
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
Why did they spit on it?
I don't know,
just for good luck.
I thought it was some
kind of new DNA code.
No, they're just coming up
with a new one while you're in.
What about eye recognition
and fingerprints?
Can't help?
No good anymore?
Apparently it's very
difficult to extract
fresh from the body.
Oh.
Hi.
Stranger danger.
I'm not a stranger.
Oh.
Brian Demerius.
Ah, I remember you.
How's your stunning beauty?
Did you buy the condo?
Actually yes.
Good for you.
Good for her.
Good for all of you.
Have a nice life!
It's cold out.
You want a ride?
I'll take you
anywhere you wanna go.
Where I wanna go or
wherever you wanna go?
Cause you know I have a date
and you're kind of in my way.
So bye.
Wait, you have a morning date?
Yes.
Well then it can't be serious.
Is there some kind of
policy that you can't have
a morning date here
that I don't know about?
Well you can't date in
the morning and be serious.
If it's a dinner date...
It wasn't supposed to be a
morning date but I was locked
in my apartment and I
couldn't get out and my...
Did you just say you were
locked in your apartment?
Anyway, it's none of
your business, okay?
Bye.
Would you just let me
give you a ride please?
I don't think so.
I'm good with metro
because now I know how
to buy the ticket.
Bye.
Hey, come on in.
Hi.
How are you?
Good.
Have a seat.
Here.
Go ahead, just have
a seat over here.
Here's the lease form.
Just sign here.
Oh it's freezing.
There.
Great.
Payment?
Right now?
Yeah.
Can I give you a check?
Sure.
No, no, don't write my name.
Don't write my name.
Just write cash, okay?
I can do that?
Yes.
I'm a doctor, okay?
I know what's best.
Cash.
Cash.
Great, thank you.
Don't worry, my sweetest.
I just have to go to
the hospital, okay?
Oh.
I'll see you soon.
Okay.
Okay.
Who's this guy?
I wonder, this Steve Press.
What?
Dr. Steve and Tanya Press.
(SINGING)
(HUMMING)
oh!
Boo, boo!
Oh.
Oh.
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
Igor!
What are you doing here?
Did my parents send you?
Do they think I'm stupid?
Oh!
I own this place.
This is my castle.
This is my home!
This is my lease!
You have no right to be here!
Show me the lease.
What?
Show me the lease.
I can't.
Here.
What's wrong with you?
Oh.
I can't believe it.
Tearing apart my stuff.
Oh you're even a bigger
loser than I thought!
What do you want?
You have no lease.
Fire the lease.
(SLOW INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
Don't touch me!
I'm sorry.
(WOMAN CRYING)
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
Watch out.
It arrived this morning.
Already open it up?
No.
You open it.
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
Comrades, the most
difficult economic situation,
much important decrease of
jobs that occurred in your area
in the past two, is that
supposed to be English?
Who cares?
Just read it.
We announce you that we are
closing your operational cell.
Decision is final
and unrevocable.
We are ordering to
immediate return
of all un-destroyed evidence.
What about my inventions?
Oh my god.
The teddy bear with the
camera inside the bow tie.
Oh my!
We are declared destitute.
With no profile station
in Paris, France.
(MAN AND WOMAN LAUGHING)
Always obey the motherland!
(MAN AND WOMAN SPEAKING
IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE)
(UPBEAT INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
So sorry for that.
Such a great dog.
Sorry for all that perfect kiss.
Such a great dog.
Oh I'm sorry for your lease.
I'm so sorry.
I'm sorry for your lease, too.
Oh you do speak English?
Good for you.
It's him.
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
Got him!
Would you get off of me?
What is this?
Who are you?
Oh you live here.
Yeah I live here.
Would you stop?
Stop it.
He lives here.
Do you have a lease?
What?
I don't need a lease.
I live here.
I'm calling the police
on you two right now.
No, don't call the police, no.
Are you insane?
Don't touch me!
You lost your minds?
No.
I know you from the pictures.
What?
You look good.
You're crazy.
No.
You're actually crazy.
(LAUGHING) No.
Dr. Steve Press.
What an asshole this guy is.
You know him?
Yeah we met in the park.
Oh me too.
He likes those big
juicy ladies like me.
You're way too skinny.
Oh!
Hey what's the matter?
I got fat!
You know what?
I should call the police.
No, no, no!
Sorry.
I hate cleaning.
Might be pregnant.
What?
Okay you can stay.
But can you clean?
Can you cook?
Okay you'll clean and you cook.
I have a shirt just like that.
Actually this is yours.
Can I keep it?
I mean I look way better
in it than you do but sure.
Thank you.
Oh don't forget that vase.
It's disgusting.
You know what?
This might work out after all.
Do you have any detergent?
How do you live in such a mess?
Don't worry about it, baby.
You know what?
Come over here.
Come see the doctor.
I'll give you a
check-up (LAUGHS).
Beautiful ladies, beautiful!
You got this.
Think about being juicy!
Come on you can do it!
Alright love it!
Perfect squats, perfect
form, loving it ladies!
Loving it!
Come on!
Yeah, get low, get
low, perfect, perfect.
Really feel it in your core
and in your gluteus
maximus, right?
No keep it going, keep it going!
You came here to get fit!
Come on, let me see it!
Let me hear it!
One!
No, I'm not hearing it ladies.
Scream it!
Two, let's go!
Three!
Three!
Feel it really hard.
Feel it in your stomach!
Five!
In your chest ladies!
Six!
In your chest!
Seven.
Let's go, woo!
That's it.
Perfect formation.
Perfect formation.
Come on.
Absolutely let's go.
Let's see what you got.
Come on.
Hit a squat.
Hit a squat.
Let's go, let's go.
Oh, you got it.
You know what you're doing.
Come on. Don't be shy.
Let's go baby.
Come on, hey.
Hey, what is this?
What is this?
I say stop?
Did I say stop?
Come on ladies.
It's cold out here.
Keep yourself warm!
Come on.
Woo!
Tanya, Tanya!
I love you!
I love you, Tanya!
We're together.
Oh no.
No.
Ah, no, no!
I don't want!
No!
Come on.
(MAN EXHALING)
Come on.
Hi.
No.
This right here?
Here, all this?
These are mine.
Just an apple.
You see it starts
with an apple.
Then it's a whole damn turkey.
I'm not having it.
Geez.
Don't call me names.
I have to find us work.
We have to eat!
What do you think
this is, a free ride?
March over to the kitchen.
Place is a mess!
Come on.
Back then when
we were younger
And I spent all of
my summers with you
In the heat of the sun
just with you my darling
Through the fields
of innocent love
We shared dreams
watched as they go
Time moved on
We belong
To an eternity
Carry this
Will you carry
this memory of me
Carry this
Will you carry
this memory of me
We've made a million steps
I wouldn't trade the
world for these moments
(MAN CRYING)
(SLOW INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
(MAN LAUGHING)
(MAN BREATHING)
What'd you want?
I need somebody.
How much?
Huh?
Well, my situation has
changed and I need money.
How much do you offer
for babysitting?
Really?
Can you come over now?
Well sure.
Thank you.
In the heat of the
sun just with you
My darling through the
fields where we felt strong
At last
Now I just want
to see your eyes
To keep a dream alive
By your side to fall in
love with you over again
Carry this
Will you carry
this memory of me
Carry this
Will you carry
this memory of me
We made a million mistakes
I wouldn't trade the
world for this moment
Carry this
Will you carry
this memory of me
Carry this
Will you carry
this memory of me
We made a million mistakes
I'd do it all again
(DOOR SHUTS)
What happened here?
Oh, oh, oh!
(MAN CRYING)
It's hard!
I'm sorry.
Britney left me.
Yeah for a
business trip right?
No, forever.
What?
(DISHES CRASHING)
Wake up the kids!
(MAN EXHALING)
Don't tell anybody about this.
(MUMBLES)
Okay.
Yep.
She's gone.
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
You know I'm still wondering
how we're gonna let Tanya
know that we've been
moving to Paris.
Don't worry.
Sharka told me she has a plan.
She used to be our best agent.
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
(MAN LAUGHING)
Sir, sir!
My train's leaving
from 7:30 to 8:30, hon.
I know.
I was thinking you're
doing so much for humanity
and you know, this is
potassium, home-made.
Thank you.
I only eat biological though.
It's organic.
Full bag of it.
Oh wow, thank you.
I am a big fan.
Is that so?
Yeah.
Arnold.
Sharka.
Nice to meet you.
Nice to meet you (LAUGHS).
Alright, see you later.
(KIDS LAUGHING)
Oh.
Yeah.
(KIDS LAUGHING)
Coffee?
No thanks.
(KIDS LAUGHING)
Can you please stop
crying already?
(MAN CRYING)
Okay, did you call her?
Yeah.
Did you call her work?
(MAN CRYING)
How can you eat?
I need energy!
I need energy!
You know what?
She told me that she's
working with some German.
Give me your phone.
Give me your phone.
If I can fool the receptionist,
she can put me through.
Is that her work?
I'll try, okay?
(SPEAKS IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE)
It's working.
(SPEAKS IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE)
I will call later.
(SPEAKS IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE)
(SLOW INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
She's not there.
Not yet.
Actually not at all.
She left me.
I'm not good enough for her.
Oh well, maybe.
You're not helping.
You're not helping.
Sorry.
(MAN CRYING)
(DOOR SQUEAKING)
What's this?
Give me that bar.
Is that my shirt?
Get out of my face.
Go.
Get out of my face.
Where is it?
Where is what?
My phone.
Well it's gone now.
What do you mean
it's gone now?
That was a gift from Tom.
Well if it was a gift from
Tom then it's even better
at the pawn shop then.
Ah, ah, ah!
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
Hey.
Hi.
How are you doing?
Fine.
Homemade for you.
Organic?
Of course.
Here.
Thank you.
Is everything alright?
Everything's perfect.
I'm making now (MUMBLES).
Yeah I can tell.
Really?
Mm hmm.
So see you tomorrow?
Absolutely.
Okay bye.
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
I made it.
Ah!
I made it.
Ah!
What happened to her?
I got the job interview.
They wanna see me.
I made it!
Congrats.
Thank you.
You gonna start paying
for your own food now?
Here I'm killing myself to
get you the best in the west
and you do nothing but gaming.
Oh, will you help me prepare?
Please, please.
Pretty please.
Maybe I'm the best
coach in this city.
I knew it.
But if we're doing this,
we're doing it my way.
Okay.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Ah!
I'm so good.
So good.
- You're punctual.
- I'm punctual.
- You're reliable.
- I'm reliable.
- You're enthusiastic.
- I'm enthusiastic.
Work well in teams.
I work well in teams.
- You're punctual.
- I'm punctual.
- You're reliable.
- I'm reliable.
You're enthusiastic.
I can't anymore!
You work well in teams.
You're not working
hard, come on.
Punctual, reliable.
Enthusiastic, work
well in teams.
Punctual, reliable.
Enthusiastic, work
well in teams.
Keep it going.
You're punctual.
I'm punctual.
- You're reliable.
- I'm reliable.
You're enthusiastic.
I have cramps!
You work well in teams!
Well in teams.
Come on, this is terrible.
Come on.
What?
This is terrible.
This sucks.
Am I right?
You're doing it right but
your legs are so skinny.
Forgot about my legs!
I have to get this job!
He's right.
Men love women's legs.
What are you doing here?
He's my stalker!
Don't talk to him like that.
He's the new owner.
Oh well, it shows
how superior we are
cause women, they don't care
about men's legs at all.
Arnold, did you
notice the new equipment
that I purchased over
there for the lower half?
Are you suggesting that my
butt isn't good enough for you?
I am merely suggesting to
Arnold that he make good use
of the new equipment.
Every time I see you I
would like to slap you!
Ha, ha, ha.
Okay?
I'm reliable.
You're what?
(UPBEAT ROCK MUSIC)
I can work under pressure.
- Yeah you can!
- I can!
- You're reliable!
- I'm reliable!
- You're punctual!
- I'm punctual!
- Work well in teams!
- I work well in teams!
- You're reliable! - I'm reliable!
- You're punctual! - I'm punctual!
- You work well in teams!
- I work well in teams!
- You got this! - I got this!
- You're good! - I'm good!
- You're punctual!
- I'm very good.
You're reliable!
She works well in teams!
I work well in teams!
You're enthusiastic!
Yeah!
- Come on!
- Come on!
You got this!
Punctual, reliable,
enthusiastic, work well in teams.
Punctual.
Punctual, reliable,
enthusiastic, work well in teams.
Punctual, reliable,
enthusiastic, work well in teams.
You're punctual!
You're reliable!
She works well in teams!
You're so good.
I think I'm ready.
- You got this.
- I got this.
- You're ready.
- Thank you.
- Yeah.
- Thank you.
Yeah.
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
Yes!
Somebody left
groceries like this!
Again.
Where is (MUMBLES)
buying all this stuff?
Is it vegetarian?
Looks amazing.
Do you know what this is?
It doesn't even
have a label on it.
Oh, this one has a label.
The cell is shut down.
The agency calls us to Paris.
Is this for you?
Paris!
No!
No?
No, no.
(SPEAKS IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE)
(SPEAKS IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE)
No, no.
Okay.
(MAN SPEAKS IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE)
Hi.
Bye!
Okay we can do it.
(MAN CRYING)
15 January, perfect.
I'm reliable.
I'm punctual.
I'm very professional.
Sorry.
(BABY CRYING)
Very professional.
(PHONE RINGING)
I'm reliable.
I'm punctual.
(BABY CRYING)
I'm very professional.
(PHONE RINGING)
Hello?
I'm reliable.
And I am a stupid, despaired
loser Britney Greenburg.
Oh Britney.
Mrs. Tanya Coba?
Yes, here.
Wait a minute.
(WOMAN CRYING)
I have your kids.
Listen.
Mrs.!
Yes, they're here.
Mrs.!
Yes.
Well I can't.
Yes, I'm coming.
(BABY CRYING)
I can't talk right now but
can we meet at one o'clock
in the breakfast place?
Yes?
Perfect!
I'm so happy.
Okay bye.
I'm reliable.
I'm punctual.
(BABY CRYING)
Hello.
Forget it.
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Let's go.
Let's go.
Listen to me.
No, you listen to me.
I don't know you.
I don't need your help.
I don't need your pity.
I don't need your nothing, okay?
Bye.
You need this job.
No, I don't need this job.
Okay?
Your ruined my day.
You ruined my dream.
You have children.
No, you've got it all wrong.
Bye.
Tanya, please.
Take it and go.
Go, go.
Tanya, please, come on.
(BABY CRYING)
Get it, go.
Go.
Ah!
No, I wanna make things right.
Okay?
I can't live without you.
I messed up.
I wasn't putting you
first and I just hope
you can forgive me.
I don't know if I can.
But after all, it is how
we repair our mistakes
that define us in
each other's eyes.
Will you re-marry me?
I will.
Yeah?
(MAN SPEAKS IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE)
Ooh
(SLOW INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
Let there be Christmas
Let there be joy
And let the light shine
On the ones you need most
Let there be Christmas
So merry and bright
Let all the children
Be in safe hands tonight
Walk among
Please and my only please
Please Mr. Santa
You don't know the
people I would need
Oh no no
Leave a message.
Tanya Coba, thank you.
(PHONE BEEPS)
Please, Tanya.
I just wanna have a conversation
where there's just peace
and quiet between us.
Please, I'll send a car tonight.
I just wanna talk to you.
(SLOW INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
Ooh
No, no, no
(VACUUM RUNNING)
Who are you?
Ah.
I...
Cleaning service.
And who are you?
Hi, cleaning services.
Oh no you're not.
(DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
So I fell for this
guy and he wasn't real.
And then we came here and we
didn't have anywhere else to go
and we didn't know
you were living here.
I'm so sorry.
So this is my story.
That's quite a story.
It really is.
Igor.
I'm sorry.
It's alright, darling.
Nothing could be worse
than flying in the backseat
from Miami in an
economical class.
Oh.
Anyway.
(SLOW INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
This Brian keeps calling
me and I'm exhausted.
I don't know what to do anymore.
Every time I feel this hope
it turns out to be wrong.
(SLOW INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
I think my mom is right.
I'm pathetic.
Should go back home
to my parents' house.
Don't do that.
That sounds like the
worst idea in the world!
Believe an old lady, darling.
You know sometimes we make
mistakes in this life.
But that shouldn't stop
us from living our lives,
from being brave and following
our hopes and our dreams.
So go!
Go get ready!
Follow this man.
He sounds really
nice, doesn't he?
So you think I should...
Call him?
I think you should
take a chance.
(UPBEAT INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
If you don't take a chance,
you don't know what you'll
have missed, so go.
Go and get your nice
dress on and let's see you
all partied up.
Yes and you can finish
the dusting please.
The place is a mess!
(UPBEAT INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
I'm tongue tied
by your loose
By it feels right
I don't need no excuse
Cause I know you're mine
Say that you will stay
That you haven't
ever felt this way
Looking in your direction
I know you're feeling
something between us
You are my obsession
I'm in too deep
lost in a dream
Looking in your direction
I know you're feeling
something between us
You are my obsession
I'm in too deep
lost in a dream
Perfect date
Perfect lips
Falling into perfect bliss
Looking in your direction
I know you're feeling
something between us
You are my obsession
I'm in too deep
lost in a dream
Looking in your direction
I know you're feeling
something between us
You are my obsession
I'm in too deep
lost in a dream
(FOOTSTEPS WALKING)
Did Mr. Demari
move in recently?
Yes, Madame.
Well, no, Madame.
Actually it's because the other
madame recently moved out.
To the penthouse?
Yes, I've heard
something like that.
Yeah.
Oh by the way, dinner
will be slightly delayed.
We have new staff but they're
very highly recommended.
Okay.
(SLOW INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
(SLOW INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
Sorry.
Absolutely beautiful.
Just like you.
Listen I asked you here...
Brian, I have to
tell you something.
No, just let me finish please.
Otherwise I'll never get
the courage to tell you.
(SLOW INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
From the moment that
I laid eyes on you,
I knew that you were different,
that you were special.
You mean awkward.
(LAUGHS) Maybe a
little bit of that, too.
But I couldn't stop
thinking about you
and I can't stop
thinking about you.
And yes, I am a successful man
but success doesn't
necessarily mean happiness.
(SLOW INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
Tanya, the feeling that
I have when I am with you
makes me the happiest
man on the planet
and I never, ever, ever
wanna stop feeling that.
(SLOW INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
And I know that you have
children and a boyfriend.
Well, there's been a
huge misunderstanding here.
What sort of misunderstanding?
You see, I don't
have children.
And I don't have a boyfriend.
You don't?
No.
Really?
Yes.
That really makes me the
happiest man on the planet.
So it would be
okay if I did this?
(FLOWING ORCHESTRAL MUSIC)
That would be really
absolutely okay.
Let's do it again.
(UPBEAT INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
I'm hungry.
Hungry?
(UPBEAT INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
I got new kitchen staff, so...
(UPBEAT INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
(UPBEAT INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
(SLOW INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
Ah!
(UPBEAT POP MUSIC)
(UPBEAT POP MUSIC)
(UPBEAT POP MUSIC)