The Quest for Tom Sawyer's Gold (2023) Movie Script

[gentle music playing]
"There comes a time in every
rightly-constructed child's life
when they have a fervent
desire to go somewhere
"and dig for hidden treasure."
There it is.
[Woody] Okay, so
what's the plan now?
What does the line at
the end of the book say?
"The Widow Douglas invests in
the gold which Tom and Huck found."
So where'd they find it?
McDougal's Cave. It's
like a mile from the river.
Guys, that was great. That
will make for a perfect intro.
Let's go again. Guys. Guys!
[JJ] "Sometimes the
legend of some riches comes
so heavily wrapped in folklore
that you gotta scrape away the edges
to work out what's honest to goodness
"and what's hogwash."
Many o' folk have gone searchin'
for Tom Sawyer's gold before,
but most all have lacked the wit
to match ol' Tom and Mr. Twain.
Yeah, maybe Woody's right.
We should go away
and think up a plan.
Yeah, like really put a good
week's worth into planning it.
All right.
[growling]
Please tell me that
was your stomach.
I was hoping it was yours.
[growling continues]
When I get to three, run
into the cave. One, two...
- Three!
- [yelps]
- [Woody exclaims]
- Woody!
This gold ol' Tom Sawyer found,
pirate gold it was.
And which Mr. Twain
scribbled down about.
Well, that treasure's as
real as the day is long.
Now, what fills me with such
earthly confidence in the matter?
[chuckling]
Simple, 'cause my
great-grandpa helped him hide it.
[adventurous music playing]
[JJ] These folks
who go searching,
well, the good ones find reward
enough in the journey itself,
but there was one
who came close.
Oh!
Now, if you can believe it, folks used
to know this one as about the bravest,
most adventurous spirit
this side of... well, anywhere.
[relieved sigh]
Agatha Armstrong,
Aggy to you and me,
came into this world with the single,
most voracious thirst for adventure.
Oh, yeah.

[Aggy] There she is.
Right there.
The reptilian carnivore
mississippiensis,
better known as
the American alligator.
[growling]
Okay.
Couldn't have
bothered you anymore.
[growling continues]
Oh, God. Go away! Go away!
Hey, snappy! How about you
pick on someone your own size?
- [tense music playing]
- [hissing]
- [cat meowing, growling]
- Ow!
[cat exclaiming]
[cat] Get out of here, darling.
- [crocodile growling]
- [cat exclaiming] Ha-ha!
How do you like
that, you scallywag!
Picking on a little girl.
I don't care if this
is your swamp.
- You can talk?
- Hm!
Hi. Eurydice B. Magillicuddy.
However, you can
call me Mrs. Mac.
Thanks for saving me.
I was almost like...
A goner? Oh, all
in a day's work!
Now, where might one find a
hearty bowl of calcium-rich liquid gold?
[JJ] It's funny the companions
you pick up along life's road.
Before long, they were the most
famous feline and biped explorers
in the entire universe.
Well, entire world.
That was until this
young'un came along
and something in Aggy changed.
She went from the most
devil-may-care adrenaline junkie
to, well, a klutz.
You're gonna be late again!
Antony...
And an overprotective
one at that.
It weren't his
fault. Not really.
If only they didn't make those
little plastic building blocks
so damned tasty
to a two-year-old.
[sighs]
Doctor told her to best keep a
closer eye on him moving forward.
And did she ever.
[gasps, sighs]
[sighs]
Have yourself a day
wherever you are.
- Now, do you have your...
- I'm gonna be late.
Then you should
have gotten up sooner.
- Have you charged your phone in case there's an emergency?
- Mom.
- Yes.
- It's better safe than sorry.
- Yes, Mom. I'm gonna be late.
- Okay. Drink.
- What? What is this?
- Just drink it.
- I gotta go.
- It's good for you.
Gross.
[Antony] She still thinks I'm three
years old. I'm being suffocated.
Yeah, suffocated by your mom.
Yeah, that'd suck.
Dude, really? I'm
baring my soul here.
I mean, my mom never
crossed the entire Arabian desert
on nothing but
a gallon of water.
Just to get lost at sea for
75 days on an inflatable raft,
fending off pirates at
every turn. I'm just saying.
Yeah, well, don't.

Hey, Ant, come on.
It's gonna be a
boring party anyway.
[indistinct chatter]
Mm, I love you, Miss Armstrong.
Damn, what the...
Good morning, sleeping beauty.
Lay off me, Lennon.
And here we have the rare
beast, the galactus stare-a-sarus.
- [laughs] I'm sorry, I wasn't, um...
- I'm just messing with you.
Okay, you lot. Settle down.
Sorry, I'm late. [sighs]
Traffic was a disaster.
All right. Right, right, right.
[exhales]
Good morning, class.
[students] Good
morning, Miss Armstrong.
Good morning, Antony's mom.
Lennon, as we've previously discussed,
in this room, I am Miss Armstrong.
Perhaps you would like the
hour in detention to reflect on that.
- [class] Ooh!
- [Aggy sighs]
Oh, do you need a
sweater? Are you cold?
- No?
- No. Stop it.
Right, onto the fun stuff.
This semester's book report.
[disappointed mumbling]
No. No, no, I think you'll
really get a kick out of this one.
Now, this particular book is written by a
man who goes by the name of Samuel Clemens.
Nah, Mark Twain wrote that.
That's a pseudonym,
his pen name.
He named his pen?
Like a stage name?
Yeah, like Lennon's
mom has at the zoo.
Bobo, the... Ow!
Do you want more detention?
Yes, Lu, that's exactly right.
And the reason
he chose that name
is because it was the call
to the riverboat captains
to let them know that the water was
deep enough for them to travel through.
"Land ho! Mark Twain, captain!"
Uh, Miss Armstrong, are you sure
we should be learning about this book?
It has antiquated values.
There's validity to that point.
But the book can't
be dismissed outright.
Now, this offers us incredible
insight into America's troubled past.
This is really a parable on developing
moral code through loyalty and friendship,
all while showing kids
how to have some damn fun.
I want all of you to
go treasure hunting.
Okay.
[Aggy] Through the pages
of this wonderful book,
and you tell me how you think
Tom Sawyer and his friends
would survive in our
modern world. Okay?
Pass that up. I've paired
you off into groups of three.
Hey, we're book report mates.
Wow! Uh, I mean,
uh, good. Great.
[JJ] Mr. Twain liked to say,
"Never let your schooling
interfere with your education."
For, after all, the man
who does not read books
has no advantage over the
man who cannot read them.
[school bell ringing]
If you have any questions,
just come up and see me.
Hey, you wanna
hang out after class?
- Yeah.
- Cool.
We can go over who will
do what with the assignment.
Oh, right. Yeah, of course.
Cool. Sweet. See you.
Hey, Ant, I'll be out
in a minute, okay?
Okay.
Hey, Miss Armstrong.
Oh, Woody, do you have a
question about the assignment?
No. Um, I, uh...
I made you something.
You...
made me something, again.
Um, that's very sweet.
Oh, I-I was inspired
by that story you told us
about the time you were
lost in the jungles of Malaysia.
- [unzips bag]
- Right. Yeah.
- Wow.
- Yeah.
Uh, that's very lovely.
What is it?
It-it lets you hear what
animals are thinking.
I-I figured since Mrs. Mac
never leaves your side,
it'd be cool to hear
what she's thinking.
See, you just press this
button right here, and then...
[exhales]
Voila!
Maybe she just doesn't have
a whole lot going on upstairs.
But I will try again
tonight when I get home.
So, thank you.
Bye, Miss Armstrong.
[Mrs. Mac] Get this ridiculous
thing off my head right now.
And don't think I won't forget. "Maybe
she doesn't have much going on upstairs."
Some days I really think I should
have just let that gator take you.
Hush, you.
Okay. [sighs] Onto
the matter at hand.
Ah, yes. The interview.
Are you ready?
No. No, I, um, I'm
freaking out about it.
Come on, we did this last night.
- What are you?
- I'm a tiger.
- I can't hear you.
- I'm a tiger.
And what does a tiger do?
They devour their prey.
And what are you going to do?
I'm going to devour my prey.
So let's get to it.
Okay. [sighs] I am a tiger.
I'm a tiger. I'm
perfect for this job.
I'm the only person
for this job. [exhales]
I'm gonna get this job.
[knock at door]
- Aggy.
- Hi.
- Thanks for coming.
- Of course, Jenny.
It's not every day that you get to
interview for your dream job. [laughs]
Oh.
Oh, I... I've come across
too eager, haven't I?
Oh, no, no, no, no. Um...
Aggy, this is... This
is just awkward. Uh...
The head of the natural history
position has, um, it's been filled.
Oh.
Oh. Um...
Was it... was it
something I did?
No, no, no, no. I mean, you're
one of our favorite teachers.
It was sudden, you know?
And I mean, honestly, I
didn't even have much say.
I've been practically training my
entire life for this type of position.
Oh, I know. I mean,
we all love hearing
all the stories of your
youthful endeavors.
It's just that, um...
Well, someone applied that has a
more, just slightly more recent rsum.
- Really?
- Yeah.
Who? [nervous laugh]

- Agatha.
- AJ.
Oh, wait. Oh, you two,
you... you know each other.
- We do.
- We do. Yes.
- Agatha used to be my...
- Acquaintance.
What are you doing in town?
Well, the school was in need
of a world-renowned explorer
to head the natural
history department,
and, uh, I was in between gigs
and thought, "What the hell?"
Do you mind if Jenny and I talk?
[clicks tongue] Ooh, no, no, no.
Go right ahead.
Oh, we're gonna sit. Okay.
Oh! Yeah, of course.
[mouthing] Bye.
I am 100 times the scholar
he is. You do realize that.
I know.
Listen, the school board
notified us that due to rezoning,
we now have too many
schools in our district.
And with cuts to funding,
they now have to close one.
And we're at the
top of the list?
- I mean...
- Yes, yes, we are.
I mean, it's been
a rough few years.
First COVID, and now this.
And so we need something
that will set us apart
and elevate us in the
eyes of the school board.
But my rsum would
run circles around his.
But you haven't updated
it in over a decade.
Aggy, we need someone
who is more of a risk-taker
and can reinvigorate
the kids' interest,
and we feel like having AJ leading
the history department will do that.
Really? Him?
Look, I'm sorry.
Oh! I'm just... [mumbling]
Oh, Mr. Harrison.
Oh, you have my full support
if you should even need it.
And, you know, if you find yourself
abandoned on the side of the road,
just go ahead. Give me a call.
Not!
- You... [muttering]
- Aggy.
We'll always have Morocco.
[Antony] Everyone thinks
I'm a mommy's boy, even Lu.
I don't think you're
a mommy's boy.
- Gee, thanks.
- [sighs] I gotta go.
[exhales] All right,
I'll see you, man.
Catch you on the flip side.
Looky here. It's Mommy
Armstrong's favorite student.
And there's me,
the least favorite.
You know, you should think
about paying the school rent,
- given how much you're in detention.
- [scoffs]
Talking to me like
that takes some guts.
How about you say we
take a closer look at 'em?
Not today.
You're dead meat, Armstrong!
I'll be comin' for you.
[Aggy sighing] Okay.
No, he's fine. He's
fine. [breathes in]
He's gonna be home. He's
gonna be home. He's gonna be fine.
Oh, my God. Ant.
You're safe. You worried me.
Where were you?
Why didn't you call me?
I'm 30 minutes late. Just chill.
No, I won't chill.
You worried me.
Fine. I'm late because the bozo you
gave detention to took it out on me.
Okay. You don't have to shout.
I do need to shout, Mom,
because you don't listen.
Why can't you just let
me be a normal kid?
[mouthing]
I can't do this anymore.
I can't live with her watching
over me all the damn time.
[ticking]
[JJ] Well, if you ask me, no good can
ever come from running away from home.
Just see for yourself how that worked
out for ol' Tom and my Grandpa Joe.
But it sure does make
for one hell of a story.

Stupid books everywhere.
"To whomever should find this...
My father's story lives forever
in the pages of Tom Sawyer."
[tense music playing]
[Angus] Come on,
boys, we're owning them.
[men shouting] Yeah!

He ain't far.
Come on.
- Let's go!
- Yeah!
[coughing]
Dip to the
moonlight Dip, dip
[coughs] Dip
Three for you
And five for me
If flame or flood
Bring harm on me
I'll give you my five
And take from you
[coughing, muttering]
My three...
[tense music playing]
Hand it over, Sawyer.
What's in it for me if I do?
- I'll let you live.
- [mouthing] Yeah.
You can work a double
shift, digging me gold.
That ain't no
deal. I want in on.
No!
What do you want?
Enough to set up my family.
Let us live peaceably.
The rest is yours.
- [gun fires]
- [groans] Ow.
[yells] You idiot!
[heavy breathing]
Tom Sawyer.
Tell your Aunt Polly,
Angus sent you.
What's so funny?
That ain't the real map.
Being rich isn't what
all its cracked up to me.
But then,
you'll never find out.
No! You idiots!
Damn it!

Okay.
So, what's this thing that's so important,
it couldn't have waited until tomorrow?
- It was real.
- What?
"Mr. Twain recorded it
most exactly as it occurred.
The only thing
he omitted was..."
[scoffs] Where's the rest of it?
No. It's just signed.
Mary Sawyer, Hannibal, 1923.
"Most of the adventures recorded
in this book really occurred.
One or two were
experiences of my own.
The rest, those of
classmates of mine."
Now, check this.
"The real Tom Sawyer and Twain
were friends in San Francisco."
Twain told Sawyer, 'I'm going
to write a book about a boy.
"Just such a boy as
you must have been.'"
The-the character's
based on a real person.
Plenty are. So what?
So, if it's based
on a real person,
then maybe the events are
based on real events, too.
They discovered pirates' gold.
Okay, $12,000 of it.
- Is that all?
- That was in 1876.
With inflation, that's like two
million dollars, give or take.
Whoa.
But... but do you guys think
that this is actually some real-life
journal of what actually happened?
Listen, this could be, like, our
one time to do something great.
Like historically huge, and
finally have people respect us.
What if people find out?
They'll fall over
themselves laughing at us.
They already laugh at us, Wood.
For two million bucks, they
can do whatever they like.
Think of all the shiny, new inventing
equipment you could snap up with that.
I bet my mom would be mad
impressed with us as well.
Hmm.
But where would we even start?
- Uh, the letter said "Hannibal", right?
- Yeah.
That's the town Twain
based St. Petersburg on.
And it's just one county over.
- [exhales]
- [Antony laughs]
- [sighs deeply]
- [laughs]
- Come on, man. Come on, Woody.
- Come on, Woodster.
[Antony] Come on. I know,
I can see it in your face.
- Let's do it.
- Woodster!
Let's find Tom Sawyer's gold.
- All right!
- Yay!
[JJ] And that's what led to these
young'uns being in this here predicament.
- [panting]
- Oh! Flashlight.
All right. Everybody,
keep your eyes peeled
in case those wolves
follow us in here.
What are we even looking for?
Right. The book said the
treasure is two miles into the cave.
[Woody] Oh, look. There it is.
[all gasping, laughing]
What?
Guys, we're gonna
be billionaires.
This is so much
more than I imagined.
Oh. Ant, what are you
gonna do with your share?
I'm gonna get my own
TV and my own house.
And probably a TV in
each room. Maybe three.
Why not four and five
houses? [chuckles]
Can you guys believe
it was that easy?
- Luxury suits you, Lu.
- Whoa.
Thank you. One does try.
The hell are you
kids doing in here?
Uh, it-it's ours.
Finders keepers.
Okay, you can have this.
- [Woody] Huh?
- [laughs]
Ugh. It's an amusement park?
State park. And
you're trespassing.
I told you guys it wasn't real.
[JJ] Now, as I said,
Tom and Mr. Twain would never have made
it easy as pie for just anyone to find.
Mr. Twain himself was just about as wise
as four folks all smashed together himself.
So it was gonna take
about that many, at least,
if anyone was ever gonna
unravel the mystery of Tom's gold.
[sighs deeply]
Generation after generation
has tried but failed,
searching for
our family fortune.
Tch. Always coming up short.
Until I, AJ Harrison,
discovered [laughs]
that my protg, a woman who
I taught everything that I know,
possesses the letter that's gonna
give me everything that I want.
[smacks lips] Well...
There ain't gonna be
no stopping me this time.
Lennon!
What now, Uncle AJ?
How would you like to
become... [smacks lips]
really rich?
[scoffs]
Gotta give you points
for adventurous spirit.
Got a nephew about your age,
can't get him off the computer,
let alone travel in the dead
of the night to hunt treasure.
What's gonna happen to us?
Well, last lot of kids who went looking
for my great-great-grandpa's gold,
ended up doing 20
to life in Leavenworth.
[Thatcher sighs]
Well, I think we can overlook the
criminal charge this one time. Hm?
[relieved sigh]
So, wait, you said, "your
great-great-grandpa's gold"?
Indeed. Tom Sawyer.
That handsome fellow
on the left right there.
What?
He was my granddad's grandpa.
Look, I don't blame you, kids.
Plenty of folks from far and
wide have gone searching for it.
I took a shot at it myself once.
So you think it's real, right?
Hmm. Well, it's a
wonderful tale to excite kids,
but it's just that.
A tale.
Alrighty. Who's drawing the short
straw and have me call their parents first?
[knock at door]
Yes?
- Can you spare a moment?
- Sure.
Sit tight. You're
gonna be all right.
I told you, guys, we were gonna
get in trouble, and... [sighs deeply]
So you were real, Tom Sawyer.
[chuckles] That's
insane. [exhales]
The three amigos.
"MDCCCLXV."
I mean, I know it's not the Wi-Fi
password, but, like, what is that?
That's the year, 1865.
They wasted a lot of space
writing it like that, right?
You guys, we've been
going about this all wrong.
Twain wouldn't make it so easy that the
treasure is exactly where it's supposed to be.
"Under the cross." We've been
thinking about the cross like a crucifix.
So what do you think it is?
"Under the cross."
You guys, Chapter X.
It's the one in the tannery.
You guys, this is
our first hot lead.
We can't just sit
here and do nothing.
What do you suggest we
do? Just stroll on out of here?
Uh... Hm.
No. We go out the back door.
Come on, hurry. Go!
- The... But...
- Shh!
Go! Woody, let's go!
Hah. And now we're fugitives.
Be careful, you idiot.
There's nothing but a
bunch of junk up here.
Look harder. It's
gonna be leather-bound.
It's gonna be yellowed,
aged, stitched with a binder.
It's gonna have lots of pages.
[scoffs] I know what a
book looks like, Uncle AJ.
[phone ringing]
[phone ringing]
Lennon?
Hello?
Miss Armstrong? This
is Detective Thatcher.
Firstly, don't
worry, they're fine.
But you'll have to come to
Hannibal to collect your son.
My son?
No, no, my son's in bed.
No, actually, they
went exploring.
Something about an
assignment you gave them?
What?
Hannibal?
How did they even
get that far? Okay.
Okay, I'm coming. I'm coming.
Oh, crap.
I think these suckers
beat us to the punch.
Okay, get out of
there. Abort mission.
Get out of there.

[Thatcher] Okay,
we'll see you soon.
Yes, I will keep an eye on them.
[exhales]
Great.
[intense music playing]
- [grunts] It's clear.
- Um...
Oh, the only one I found
is the old Mitchell Tannery.
It says it closed
in 1984, though.
- It's seven blocks away.
- That's where we start.
- Okay.
- Let's go.
[Mrs. Mac] What about a personal security
guard to monitor him 24 hours a day?
You should have taken
that turn back there.
Cat, I remember every single road, alley,
underpass, and freeway I have ever been on.
I know the way.
[sighs] When I get
my hands on him...
Well, for someone with
a photographic memory,
it seems to have slipped your
mind what you were like at his age.
[irritated sigh]
My arms are getting tired.
[tense music playing]
Here.
[exhales]
"He picked up a
clean pine shingle
that laid in the moonlight.
"They buried the
shingle close to the wall."
Here.
It can't be in here.
It's got to be like an
outside wall then, right?
I saw some shovels coming in.
Grab them quietly.
Now, let's go.
Let's get digging.
[loud bang]
- Ant!
- Sorry.
Detective Thatcher?
I'm looking for
Detective Thatcher.
- Hi.
- [door closes]
Hi.
Uh, Agatha. Aggy. Antony's mom.
Yes.
So, uh, did you
have a good drive?
It was fine.
Well, come with me.
- I have a little update on the kids.
- Oh, okay.
[Aggy shouts] What?
[gentle music playing]
I can't find anything.
This is a waste of time.
All night for...
- nothing.
- Wait.
They said they found
the treasure under the X.
Under the X is Chapter Nine.
Okay, so where are
they in that chapter?
It's the one in the graveyard.
Come on.
Guess we're going
to a graveyard.
I hate graveyards.
[Thatcher singing]
Dip, dip, dip
Three for you
And five for me
Is now really the
time for karaoke?
Sorry. Habit.
I always do it when I'm worried.
[man over radio] Thatcher,
we've got a break in at the tannery.
Three minors spotted. Over.
Thatcher's responding.
[Woody] Let's just
do this quick, okay?
Tom said, "Huck, do you reckon
Hoss Williams hears us talking?"
That's who we're looking for.
Okay, then let's split up.
Call out if you find something.
- All right.
- Okay.
[Aggy] Come on out, guys.
You're not in trouble.
Antony!
Freshly dug right here.
This is his.
Why is it here?
They said something about
an assignment you gave 'em.
On Tom Sawyer.
Wait.
Tom and Huck buried a pine shingle at an
old tannery after they witnessed a murder.
Is there a graveyard nearby?
Hannibal Graveyard.
Oldest around.
Then that's where
they are. Let's go.
Hey, come look.
I mean, it's close.
Do you think they're related?
There must be some clues
around here somewhere.
[sighs]
Wait, the...
That's weird.
- [cracks]
- What... Whoa! Whoa! Woody!
No! Whoa.
- Huh? What the...
- Ah!
[Woody] I think I'm
ready to go home now.
[Antony] Sorry, Mary.
I told you, guys,
this was a dumb idea.
You guys said, "Oh,
we'll find treasure."
All we've done is get
arrested and find a skull.
How am I gonna
explain this to my mom?
At least we tried.
I just wanna go home.
I...
Dude, wait, really?
Sorry.
You too? Come
on, guys, seriously?
[muttering]
Hey, wait.
It-it's a... It's a puzzle.
Guys, we have to give this up.
We're in enough
trouble as it is.
It's not
Hoss Williams.
It's "Who is...
someone".
Wait, letter mix.
- Yeah.
- Take the S,
and put it in front of the
A and the M. It's "Sam".
And the other S makes "Sill".
"Sam Sill"?
It is real.
So that's it. "Who is Sam Sill?"
All right, let's go
find Sam Sill then.
- Okay, let's go.
- [bird chirping]
[JJ] Well, what do you know?
They've gone and done what
no one's ever done before.
Solve the first riddle
of ol' Tom's mystery.
[chuckles]
Guys, found him. Over here.
- Sam Sill.
- Nice, dude.
- [stone grinding]
- Whoa! What...
No way.
- Is that the...
- The map.
[chuckles]
Do you guys know
what this means?
It means you all
are in huge trouble.
- Hi, Miss Armstrong.
- Hey, Mom.
It would take the remainder of
your teenage years to blueprint
just how much
trouble you lot are in.
- But, Mom, we have to...
- Antony Auggie Armstrong.
You are so grounded that your
clothes will be back in fashion
by the time your
punishment is even over.
- Let's go. Now.
- Detective, can you explain it to her?
- Can you help us out?
- Sorry, guys, I'd love to help.
But as you ran out on me,
it's time to face the music.
- But, Mom, we...
- Now, Antony.
Miss Armstrong, we're so close.
- Don't you get that it's real?
- Seriously, we were so close.
I knew it.
Hey. Hey, Buttons.
Yeah, I'm thinking of getting
the band back together.
You think you can pull another
Alabama coat hanger for me?
[laughs]
[Aggy] I cannot believe you
would be so irresponsible, Antony.
But we have proof that the
gold and Tom Sawyer is real.
- [sighs]
- Look, we found this map.
No, that is just a
worthless old scroll.
You never believe me.
Do you have any idea how many
wild goose chases I've been sent on
because of a stupid map? No.
No, none of you have any clue
how dangerous it can really be.
[Antony] How would
I ever get to know?
I mean, you took a job at my school to
watch over me every second of the day.
I did not.
I like teaching.
You hate teaching.
You love adventure.
I mean, at least you used to
before you had me,
before you scared Dad away.
Now I have an overprotective
mother and an absent father,
and neither of us have fun ever.
It's because I love you, okay?
Then I'd hate to see how
you'd be if you hated me.
You dropped this, by the way.
Why did you even take that?
Because I was...
going to find the gold and then
run away to Utah to find Dad.
[sighs] Ant, your father...
He's a door best left unopened.
Well, he can't be
any worse than you.
He hates me. Ant just hates
me. He just... He hates me.
Your mom's really
talking to herself.
[Lu and Woody laugh]
[Mrs. Mac] He's just
hot under the collar.
But I can't say I blame him.
You know, you'll always catch
more flies with honey than vinegar.
- [sighs]
- Hm.
[sighing]
Damn it.
Ugh, I left the house in such
a hurry, I forgot my purse.
I need to borrow
your debit card.
I will pay you back
when we get home.
Thank you.
He's proud of me.
[JJ] They say once you
have that lust for adventure,
it never... well,
never truly dies.
It lives on inside
of you, dormant,
waiting for that moment to
snatch you back into it. [chuckles]
It's a feeling almost as pervasive as a
mother not wanting to let her son down.
Almost.
Oh, if... if we do this...
You took me hostage, and
we are back home in 24 hours.
- Okay?
- [cheering]
- Okay. All right, Mom.
- [Lu] Let's go!
[sighs] It's time I took the
road less traveled again.
All right, buckle up. It's
gonna be a wild ride. [laughs]
Okay, seriously though,
buckle up. Safety first.
Everyone, act natural,
pretend like I'm not even here.
- [sighs deeply]
- [chuckles]
Ugh. Just put that away already.
Stupid moths
have eaten half of it.
And half the words are missing.
Nothing here makes sense.
"Dip, dip, dip, if,
nor, bring the..."
The words are so
small, I can't make it out.
I may have just the thing.
Aw, hey, kitty-cat. Do you wanna
learn how to talky-talk like a person?
- Oh, yes, you do.
- Oh...
- I'm gonna give it one more try.
- Woody...
- Let's see.
- I wouldn't do that if I were you.
What the... I-I
didn't put that on yet.
Oh, Mom.
I guess the cat's
out of the bag now.
It would be a
cataclysmic catastrophe
to categorically succumb to
the catalytically catatonic states
of which you currently cater.
- Huh?
- I gotta get this.
Oh, man, this scene
could use a little more light.
That's okay. We'll roll with it.
I just want, like, a relaxed
performance from everyone.
Okay? And action.
No, you're not filming me.
I'm going back to my trailer.
[exclaiming]
[Mrs. Mac snoring]
Why not?
Hey, all this time and you never
told me Mrs. Mac could talk?
I-I'm...
I guess there's one or two things
I haven't quite told you about yet.

And I'm assuming that's
been here my entire life, too.
Where's the spare tire?
I don't know, man.
- Okay. Get the map out.
- Okay.
"In Allister's Cove,
the second shall be...
Solve the puzzles there
laid, and look within to see."
It's only accessible
through the bayou.
It's about five
miles down the road.
Pack up the map. Woody, grab
what you can from the kit. And, Lu?
Keep filming.
You got it.
Okay, let's go.
[police siren wailing]
- Uh...
- Hi.
It's fine.
- Hi.
- Ah, car trouble?
Oh, no. No, we're fine. We...
It's just a pit stop, but we're
moving along now, so...
Yeah, whoa, whoa,
whoa there, Missy, uh...
You can't stop on
the side of the road.
Not in this town.
Oh, okay, I'm...
I'm sorry. I didn't...
I didn't know what the rules in this
district were, but it won't happen again.
Oh, you wouldn't be on a
treasure hunt now, would you?
No. No, we're going home.
- Kids?
- The map.
- Uh-huh. Map?
- [gasps] Uh...
- What map?
- Oh, hmm.
Wise girl, huh?
Hand it over now.
- Mom.
- Give it to him, give it to him.
No, don't.
Pick it up. I
ain't playing, kid.
- Run!
- Go!
- Go, go!
- Go!
[officer] Ugh!
That's not mud!
[grunts]
[Woody] Run!
- [Aggy grunts]
- [Lu] Go! Go.
- [panting]
- Whoa.
Where do we go? Where do we go?
- Is he following us?
- Keep going.
This way. This
way. Don't look back.
- Just keep going.
- [grunts]
Brats.
Excellent work, my old pal.
You just earned your 20 percent.
- Hey, what about me?
- Shut up, Lennon.
A chance to get that turd
back will sweeten the deal.
Oh, you're gonna
get it. And then some.
It's in Allister's Cove.
Allister's Cove. All right.
That means we're gonna
go up and around the bayou.
Then let's move. Let's move.
Hey, can you carry
some, Uncle AJ?
Lennon, I'm carrying the map.
- Do you wanna be rich?
- Yeah.
You consider
yourself an athlete?
Then let's move.
[tense music playing]
- [panting]
- Okay.
I think we're clear.
- Oh, no.
- Are you okay?
Are you okay, bud? [panting]
Sorry, guys, we...
We lost the map.
That's okay, because we have a
budding filmmaker who got it all on tape.
I was actually just getting
you guys' close-up shots.
I was gonna get a pickup
shot of the map later.
Well, that's that. We're done.
No, no, no, no, no. I'm
not gonna let that happen.
Look, when I was your age, I
was running all over the place
chasing after all
sorts of things.
But you guys have gotten closer
than anyone ever has with this.
We're gonna see this through.
We're gonna keep
doing this, okay?
But how?
Hand me a pen and
paper from the kit.
An elephant never forgets.
So either I'm part elephant
or it's very fortuitous
that you have a chaperone
who has photographic memory.
- No way.
- Whoa. Whoa.
And why didn't you
tell me any of this?
Must have slipped
my mind. [laughs]
That's funny, Mom. Not.
So you remember everything?
Everything.
Whoa.
Okay. So it looks like we
have to go through the river.
It's a couple of
miles down that way,
so we got to keep going.
- All right?
- Let's go.
Let's do this.
[Aggy] I think we're
going the right way.
At least we're finally
in the clear, right?
[growling]
Why did you have
to say that out loud?
Whoa, whoa, whoa. Get back.
- Get back.
- Get back. Get back. Get behind me.
[growling]
Shoo! Shoo!
- [growling continues]
- [yelps]
[breathes out]
Why are they
throwing rocks at me?
- So rude.
- [gasps]
It switched on. [laughs]
First, you come
to steal my babies.
Then you go throw rocks at me.
Um, Miss Alligator, we're
not trying to steal your babies.
Good. You'd be in
a lot more trouble.
What brings you out this far?
Um, we were looking for
Allister's Cove, but we got lost.
Allister's Cove is
just down the river.
Tell you what, as an apology
for trying to eat you 25 years ago,
why don't you take
that rowboat over there?
Look, I'm sorry about your eye.
I wish I would have known all
those years ago that you were...
just trying to
protect your family.
Aw, don't mention it.
Well, so long now.
Y'all have a pleasant trip.
[water splashing]
My invention works.
I knew it. I knew it.
- [Aggy] Oh, yes.
- Good job, Woody.
[Woody] Yeah, man.
- All right, we gotta keep a move on.
- That's great.
Let's go. This way.
[chuckles]
[adventurous music playing]
Let's go.
Okay.
Now I feel like I'm in
a Mark Twain novel.
- Nah, we're in a movie.
- Wow.
Okay, the location of the next
map is right over that ridge.
Okay, let's go.
Hurry.
This way.
That's my idea.
I think it could work,
but I'll think it out.
"What's done on a dare
yet comes in two pairs?
How I'll spend mine, I know, but
what will you get with your share?"
Share.
I got it. Okay.
Huck asked Tom what would
he do with his share of the loot.
Chapter 25.
Yeah, it's right here. Okay.
"Tom said he'll buy
these four things.
A drum."
Uh... Okay, the drum.
"A sure-'nough sword."
- Oh, over there.
- Oh, there it is.
"A red necktie."
Uh, necktie. Got it.
"And a bull!"
- Whoa!
- Whoa! Whoa! Wait!
Wait, bull pup!
- [shouting]
- Bull pup!
- Bull pup!
- Bull pup!
[gasping]
Everyone okay? You okay?
- Yeah.
- I'm so sorry.
[stone grinding]
Dude, will this riddle ever end?
Oh. [exhales]
Woody, this looks
like a task for you.
Here.
[groaning]
You know what we're
gonna do at first light?
Mm-hmm.
- We're gonna track down
those wannabes, - Mm-hmm.
Those imposter treasure hunters,
and then...
it's all gonna be
about fame and glory.
Oh, and don't forget the gold.
[laughs]
I almost... I almost
forgot about the gold.
Let's not forget the gold.
Hey, Lennon. [clears throat]
Are you having trouble
pitching that tent?
"Let's go treasure
hunting," you said.
"It'll be fun," you
said. What is this?
Are you not having fun?
I just thought we could spend
some uncle-nephew time.
Maybe he don't want his share?
Oh, yeah.
I gotta get this.
Yeah, it's a steamboat.
How's a steamboat gonna
help us find the next map?
Um, maybe it'll
float to where it is.
Well, the map said,
"Look within and you'll see."
[Woody] Whoa, I think
these are coordinates.
Oh.
- Okay.
- Um, longitude,
27.7676 degrees north.
- Got it.
- Latitude, uh,
82.6403 degrees west.
West...
Oh.
Oh, that's... That's
just right over here.
- Oh!
- Okay, come on. Let's go.
- Come on.
- Check it out.
[Antony laughs]
This is the spot.
Yeah, it's supposed
to be right here, but...
Does it say anything
else in there?
Um...
Wait.
Oh!
Found it. Uh, "Twain 0.12"?
That cheeky bugger.
- A twain...
- Is a measurement of depth.
You were paying attention.
And 0.12 percent of a twain
is about a foot and a half.
Get the shovel
out of my backpack.
[Woody] Hold this.
Almost there. Come on, Woody.
Wait.
[Woody exhales]
Whoa!
Oh. The moths must have
eaten it away like the other map.
No, it needs to be
aligned with the first map.
Look.
Oh, that-that's why the rhyme
was so weird in the other one.
Well, do you remember
the other words?
I do, but without it being perfectly
lined up, it-it wouldn't make any sense.
We need that first map back.
I might have a
stroke of luck for you.
It appears you have some
scallywags following you.
They set up camp right
outside my hidey-hole.
Okay.
Operation Treasure
Map Rescue commence.
Um...
I'll come up with something
snappier on the way.
- [Lu] That's true.
- That was terrible.
Please.
[AJ] So she was
about five-foot-ten.
She said her name was Margaret.
There's the map, right next
to the water cooler. [exhales]
Told you guys, bringing
this would come in handy.
Those filmmaking skills
may have just saved the day.
Okay, so here's
what we're gonna do.
Actually...
Ant, what do you
think we should do?
Okay. Um...
Lu, you're gonna
sneak in to get the map.
Copy that.
Woody, you hide behind the tree
and be ready to protect her, okay?
Sir, yes, sir.
Mom, you circle
around that exit.
- Roger that.
- And I'm gonna distract them.
- Everyone got it?
- Got it.
Right, then.
[AJ] Well, we're surrounded,
and, uh, the whole tribe...
- [Ant howling]
- Huh?
- What was that?
- [Ant howls, coughs]
Lennon, go check it out.
You're dead, mama's boy!
[grunting]
Nothing but net, Lennon.
[Lennon grunts]
I'm gonna get you!
The map is gone.
The girl's got the
map. Come here, you...
I'm gonna get you! [grunts]
- [thuds]
- [Woody] Ha-ha!
Now you know why
they call me Wood-y.
AJ?
Ugh, head of natural history.
I should have known
that you were behind this.
[clicks tongue] Well, I am
a treasure hunter, Agatha,
and you should know not to
get between a treasure hunter...
- and his gold.
- [exhales]
What are you gonna
do, AJ, hurt me?
[scoffs] Yeah, I am.
You wouldn't dare.
What makes you so sure?
Well, let's face it. You've
always been in love with me.
Me, in love with you!?
Wow, that is a big alligator!
[growls loudly]
That is an alligator.
And, uh, we're gonna put a
pin in this for now. Buttons!
- [alligator growling]
- Buttons!
Thanks, Marielle.
[soft growling]
[Antony] So how do you know him?
I was his, uh, research
assistant in college.
Yeah, we explored the world
together, and on our last exploration,
he scammed me.
So, um, we haven't
seen each other since.
- [Lu and Woody laughing]
- Did you see him?
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
Okay, let's take out the maps.
[Woody] Oh.
- Line them up.
- Here.
Um, "Dip to the
moonlight, dip, dip, dip.
Three for you and five for me."
A riddle?
No, it's a song.
And I know just
where I've heard it.
- Detective!
- Detective Thatcher!
- Is the detective in?
- No, no, no, he's very busy.
- He can't talk right now.
- But we need to speak to him!
[door clanking]
What's the commotion about?
You after Huck
Finn's gold now, too?
We made the decision
to keep looking.
[Woody] Yeah,
and we found these.
When you line them up
correctly, they spell out this rhyme.
- That's the family song.
- Mm-hmm.
I remember you
humming it in the car.
- You do?
- Mm-hmm.
You'd make quite the
detective, Miss Armstrong.
Oh, you made
quite the impression.
Uh, you're singing.
Uh, you're singing made
quite the impression,
- and that's why...
- Mom.
- The maps. Come on.
- Right.
It-it was an old family song.
My grandmother sang it to
my father, who sang it to me.
Our family were coal miners,
and our great-great-grandpa
came up with it to get his spirits up
when he was trapped
down in a mine for four days
- in the 1800s.
- [Aggy] Mm.
So it's hinting at being hidden
somewhere deep underground.
The nearest place is McDougal's
Caves where we found you guys.
Ugh. But we
already looked there!
Yeah, to no avail.
Not with a Sawyer, you didn't.
You're coming?
- Yes!
- Let's go!
- [Lu laughs]
- Let's find that gold!
[Lu] Whoo!

Oh.
Legend has it that more have
entered than have returned.
So, stay close, guys.
Does that mean
someone has died in here?
- [breathes in]
- [gasps] No. Oh!
[ominous music playing]
Are you sure we
should be doing this?
Just... just stay together.
[Antony] It's okay, man.
"Dip to the moonlight."
Guys, uh, find a place in the
roof where light can beam through.
Right there.
Great.
Now, if we can "dip, dip, dip"
- underneath these rocks...
- [Aggy] Mm-hmm.
We should be close, right here.
And then it says, "Three
for you and five for me."
Paces, right?
But where do we start?
Um, we can...
Oh. Maybe out that cross.
Yeah. That's gotta be it, right?
Okay, so, paces, right?
- Mm-hmm.
- Mm-hmm.
Three and five.
One, two, three.
One, two, three,
four, five.
Look above you.
Anything?
[grunts] I don't know.
- [clinking]
- [gasping]
- You got something?
- Yeah, yeah, I think so.
[gasping]
- [Woody] Whoa!
- [laughs] Good.
[laughs] We found the map.
[gasping]
- This is so cool.
- Yeah.
"If flood or fire
should harm me..."
"I take from you five
and give you my three."
"Take from you..."
- No.
- [gasping]
Take it all from you.
I would like to thank the
inventor of this, uh, [laughs]
ridiculous contraption.
The GPS within helped us
track you all the way here.
Lennon.
All right, phones
out. Give them up.
- [Lu] No.
- Just do it.
- Out, out. Now.
- It's not worth it.
Give me. Ooh, XR-17. Nice.
Thank you. And, of course...
- You.
- No.
Oh. This is gonna take
me all the way to the gold.
You won't get far.
Just watch me.
Agatha, you've spent your
whole life chasing history.
Allow me
to add you to it.
Bye-bye now.
[evil laughs]
- Back. Go. Go. Now!
- Go to the back!
[Aggy] Run!
Whoa, whoa, whoa. Whoa! [pants]
I think we owe 'em
a moment of respect.
Agatha, you were a worthy foe,
but, uh, you know, we all meet
our makers someday, right?
And, uh, furthermore,
that's good.
Let's go get rich.
[laughing]
[groaning, coughing]
[coughing]
[Woody] Oh, no.
This is all my fault.
What? No, Woody, you are
not to blame for his greed.
No.
[JJ] "And what does it amount
to?" said Satan with his evil chuckle.
Nothing at all.
You always come
out where you went in.
Oh, for them to get this far to only
have it snatched at their final hurdle,
life sure is a kick in
the guts sometimes.
[insects chirping]
[grunts]
Someone will be here eventually.
No, they won't.
This is hopeless.
And to think this is
how it's all gonna end.
And... and I never even got the chance to
change the world with one of my inventions.
I never got to win an Oscar.
I never made the
news catching criminals.
Not even once.
[sighs] And I never...
Oh, no, I've...
I've really gotten to do pretty
much everything there is to do,
so, never mind.
What about you, Ant?
Uh, I...
It's dumb.
- Mm, come on.
- It doesn't matter.
Well... Listen, we just have to
look on the bright side, okay?
They're not gonna get very far
without that torn piece from the letter.
Wait. How do you know
that the letter was torn?
You told me that it was.
Uh, no.
I didn't tell you.
Okay.
Well, maybe this
isn't my first time
looking for Tom
Sawyer's treasure.
Oh, wait.
Do you know what this means?
No.
[breathes out]
[drone humming]

- [tapping on car window]
- Oh!
What in the name
of all that's holy?
Hmm. You don't
see that every... Oh!
Come back here, you wee scully.
That was a good
burger, my friend.
Whoa!
- What?
- That's ten types of illegal right there.

We've been going
in circles for hours.
Do you not know
how to read this map?
Mm, no.
Each map seems to
point in a different direction.
One goes here, one goes
there, one goes nowhere.
Wait a minute.
There is a reason why the
world's most renowned explorer,
an anthropological...
You're an
anthropologist, Uncle AJ.
Whatever.
The secret hiding place
to Tom Sawyer's gold is...
- The Temperance Tavern.
- The Temperance Tavern.
T-this way!
[chuckles]
[drone humming]
Oh, what in the dickens?
Oh, no. The battery died.
- Um...
- Oh.
That's Detective Thatcher's car.
Meow. Meow. Meow...
Okay, fine, I'm a talking cat.
Yawnfest.
Now, will you please
go into those caves,
follow their scent,
and rescue my friends,
who heavens to Betsy I fear
may well be trapped down there?
Let's go.
And don't you dillydally.
[Thatcher] Thanks, guys.
Call more reinforcements
to secure the perimeter
- at the final site.
- Got it.
- We'll meet you guys there.
- Okay.
Do we need to
draw the map again?
No, I know exactly where it is.
Hey, um, you did a
really good job in there.
Oh, thank you.
[car door closes]
As a student of history,
I have to ask myself what stories
would these walls tell if they could speak.
If you bothered to read the book,
you'd already know the answer.
Agatha,
how did you...
No matter.
So, bringing your encyclopedic knowledge
of literature to a gunfight, I see.
It has perfect aim.
Well, I will tell you this.
I'm gonna fill you all full of
new holes to breathe from
if you don't tell us
where that treasure is.
The gold was never
hidden in just one place.
[exhales] See, it was...
always that last line in the
riddle that really stumped me.
"Take from you five
and give you my three."
Ant, what does Twain's
opening passage in his book say?
"Tom Sawyer is a combination of the
characteristics of three boys whom I knew,
and therefore belongs to the
composite order of architecture."
[chuckles] So, what are you
saying? Tom Sawyer wasn't real?
Oh, no, he was real.
But three made up this story.
- [waves crashing]
- [knock at door]
Miss Armstrong, yes,
I've been expecting you.
That gold belonged
to just three men.
Thomas Sawyer, Ben Rogers...
And Joe Harper.
My great-grandpappy.
That ol' Tom Sawyer
made a promise
to not let that gold
fall into Angus' hands.
[Aggy] Just as I promised
to never let it fall into yours.
You were obsessive from the day
we met about your family's fortune.
So after you double-crossed me,
I made it my goal to
seek out every last detail
to ensure you never found it.
So I destroyed its final secret
to always keep you at bay,
and I've been carrying
the remainder of that letter
and the location of the gold
in my head all of these years.
Wait a minute, if you
had all this information,
why didn't you come
for the treasure yourself?
I tried.
But not every stone
needs to be turned,
not every treasure pocketed.
Well, Aggy... [clicks tongue]
That's where we differ.
See, the only thing
that matters to me...
Ant!
You're gonna tell
me where the gold is.
The safety is on, you moron.
Moron? [groans]
[grunting]
[groaning]
[both grunting]
- [sword clinks]
- [yells] Ah!
[AJ panting]
I'll tell you this.
[sword clinks]
I was the captain
of my fencing team
at college! [grunts]
Impressive. But so was I.
- Get him, Miss Armstrong.
- Come on!
- Come on, Uncle AJ.
- Let's go, Miss Armstrong.
- [yells]
- [grunts]
- [grunting]
- Come on, Uncle AJ!

- Come on!
- Come on, Miss Armstrong!
- Ah!
- [sword clinks]
- Miss Armstrong!
- Be careful!
It's too bad, Agatha.
We could have been
partners. It's a shame, isn't it?
Don't hurt my mom!
Do what you want. I might
do something like this.
No!
What are you gonna
say now, punk? Huh?
[hisses]
- [grunts]
- [thuds, groans]
- Mrs. Mac!
- Enough.
Don't! He's your son.
He's my what?
Morocco?
- Oh.
- [sighs]
And then you left me
abandoned on the side of a cliff.
I never wanted to
speak to you again.
Aggy, why didn't you tell me?
- [door opens]
- Freeze!
Aggy, why didn't you tell me?
- Cuff him.
- This is my son?
Now I can see it.
You're almost as
good-looking as I am.
- [handcuff clinking]
- You're under arrest.
Kidnapping, attempted murder,
assaulting a police officer,
theft, destruction
of public property.
And I think you have a
case with animal welfare.
- Let's go.
- Whatever, cop.
I'll be out by morning.
I love you, son!
Aggy! We'll always have Morocco!
[door closes]
Ant, are you okay?
I don't even know, man.
[sad music playing]
Goodbye, my old friend.
Excuse me, who
are you calling old?
[relieved sigh]
Don't play like that.
- Mrs. Mac...
- You're alive.
Yes, well, I guess that's,
hmm, five down, four to go.
Well, you go rest.
We'll be right back.
Ah, time for a wee catnap.
So long.
I now know why you
never told me about him.
But what about this?
It's...
just a dime store novelty.
I'm sorry, I just...
I thought that
the mystery of who he was
being wrapped up in a trinket
felt fitting for us.
No, yeah, I-I get it.
Really.
I'm sorry.
So...
there's no gold?
Oh, no, there's definitely gold.
I just had to wait for the
detective to bring his backup.
Wait, so then where is it?
Somewhere out in that
yard are the final clues
that the three men who
inspired this very book left.
Joe Harper, Ben Rogers,
and Tom Sawyer himself.
And if we find his three,
then we'll find what "take
from you five" means.
So, let's go.
- We're gonna find that gold.
- Yeah.
[watch ticking]
Hey, I found a "TS Loves MD".
[Aggy] Okay, that's one.
Where are you?
Oh, I found the second.

[chuckles]
I found Ben Rogers.
"Take from you five
and give you my three."
Okay. Take five paces
towards the center.
So we're standing on it?
We're about to find out. Shovel.
- Lu, can you grab mine?
- Yeah.
[JJ] Now, if that don't prove the
true meaning of teamwork, huh?
Everyone giving their own special
little part of themselves to help find it.
Then they surely went and
changed the meaning on me.
- Oh!
- [gasps]
- You hear that?
- Hear that?
- [gasping]
- [laughing]
[grunts, pants]
[creaking]
- [gasping]
- Oh!
- [all exclaiming]
- We did it!
- All right!
- Wow!
So much of it.
This is so pretty.
It's real.
[exhales]
It's a shame we can't keep it.
Wait, what?
No, we found it, it's ours.
No, he's right. It belongs to the
Sawyers and the Harpers and the Rogers.
I think there will be a
generous finder's fee though.
- [gasps] Seriously?
- [chuckles]
Wait, what are we
talking, like fifty-fifty?
- We'll work something out.
- Hm.
[JJ] After the shares
were divvied out,
they did what anyone with the
right constitution would have done.
Went right ahead
and put it back .
Most of it, anyway.
All so the next generation
of you thrill-seekers
could track down the secret of
that pirate gold for yourselves.
I think great-great-grandpa
Sawyer would be very proud.
Yeah?
[JJ] And, you know,
I think Mr. Twain would
have approved too.
Hm. At the end of the day,
that's all he ever wanted.
"A little more kindness,
a little less speed."
A little more giving,
a little less greed.
A little more smile,
a little less frown.
A little less kicking a
man while he's down.
A little more
'We', a little less 'I'.
A little more laugh,
a little less cry.
A little more flowers
on the pathway of life.
"And fewer on graves
at the end of the strife."

[adventurous music playing]
[music fades]