Top Secret! (1984) Movie Script
Security has been tightened
throughout the country.
All borders have been placed
on full alert.
Exit visas have been suspended
for the entire week.
In addition,
we have received assurances...
from our undercover agents
in the West...
that our actions to date
have gone completely undetected.
All military leaves
have been canceled...
and we have doubled the guard
around Dr. Flammond.
And finally, all systems...
are in readiness for deployment
of the Polaris Mine.
Just as you ordered,
General Streck.
Well done, Von Horst.
By Sunday, the entire
NATO submarine fleet...
will be here on their maneuvers
and completely vulnerable.
Major Crumpler...
what is the progress
of our diversionary plan?
The schedule
for the cultural festival...
is now complete, Herr General.
And you should be pleased to note
that at your personal request...
the Soviets have agreed to send
their celebrated tenor...
Vladimir Biletnikov.
Well done, Herr Major.
Then everything has gone
according to the plan.
Well, not exactly, mein General.
The American, Leonard Bernstein,
unfortunately has had to cancel.
But they are sending
another performer in his place.
In fact, we have just received...
this copy
of his most recent record album.
His name is Nick Rivers.
I'm sure he will be quite adequate.
As long as
the attention of the world...
is firmly fixed
on our cultural festival...
no one will know
what is about to happen.
And once again, Germany will become
united under one rule... ours!
After Sunday, there will be
no one to stop us!
Skeet surfin'
If everybody had a 12-gauge
And a surfboard too
You'd see 'em shootin'and surfin'
From here to Malibu
Because it's totally bitchin'
Ridin' waves to blast the pigeons
And it's so neat shooting skeet...
While you're riding
on the heavies all day
First wave, don't get tired
Second wave, aim higher
Third wave, pull and fire
- Skeet surfin'
- It's all right
Waxin'down our surfboards
And loadin'up our traps
Tell the teacher we're shootin'
We're never comin'back
I've got a gun rack in my Chevy
For when the surf
and the flak get heavy
And we'll have fun with our guns...
Till our lifeguard
takes our ammo away
First wave, don't get tired
Second wave, aim higher
Third wave, pull and fire
- Skeet surfin'
- It's all right
First wave, get the knack
Second wave, pull the trap
Third wave, how's that
- Skeet surfin'
- It's all right
Sharing sunsets
with my favorite girl
When we shoot the curl
we really shoot the curl
First wave, don't get tired
Second wave, aim higher
Third wave, pull and fire
- Skeet surfin'
- It's all right
First wave, get the knack
Second wave, pull the trap
Third wave, how's that
I wish they all could be
double-barrel
Wish they all could be
double-barrel guns
Skeet surfin', can't you see
Do you wanna come along with me
Skeet surfin', can't you see
Do you wanna come along with me
Skeet surfin', it's all right
Little girl
we'll have fun tonight
Skeet surfin', can't you see
Do you wanna come along with me
Grab your board
and run to your gun
A pen.
A pen.
A table.
A table.
The pen is on the table.
There is sauerkraut
in my lederhosen.
Come in.
What did he say?
I think we're at
the East German checkpoint.
Better have our passports ready.
Now remember, Nick,
this is the first time...
rock music has ever been allowed
in this country.
So, you're not just a performer,
you're an ambassador...
representing America.
And above all, remember,
we've got to play by their rules.
Martin, I've been practicing.
How's this?
- What does that mean?
- Is your daughter 18?
Your papers, please.
Mr. Nick Rivers.
We've been awaiting the arrival
of the famous American singer.
Come here!
- Where are they taking him?
- They are not taking him anywhere.
Do not let your American curiosity
lead you into trouble, Mr. Rivers.
You are a guest here
only because it serves our purposes.
I suggest that during your stay...
it would be wise
to keep to your own affairs.
Good day.
- What the hell did you say to him?
- Nothing.
I just told him I put his name
on the Montgomery Ward mailing list.
I'm sorry. He's just
a little tired from the trip.
Normally, he wouldn't have said...
Your attitude is being noted,
Mr. Rivers.
If that was your idea
of being an ambassador...
we're headed for a lot of trouble.
I want a schnauzer
with my Wiener schnitzel.
Souvenirs, novelties,
party tricks.
Souvenirs, novelties,
party tricks.
Do you know any good white
basketball players?
There are no good white
basketball players, my friend.
There was trouble
on the Berlin Express.
They knew I was on that train.
We suspect there is a traitor
somewhere in the Resistance.
We must proceed, nonetheless.
There is too much at stake.
Here, kind sir,
smell this flower.
It never fails
to amuse at parties.
That's very good.
The Germans are planning something.
Time is running out.
Have you found out
where Dr. Flammond is being kept?
Here. This is one of
our most popular items.
That's very good, ja.
We do not know where
they are keeping Dr. Flammond...
only that they are forcing him
to build a new weapon.
What are my instructions?
Here. Here. Try this.
This will make you very popular
at social gatherings.
Go tonight to the ballet.
Here. Use this ticket.
You will meet
the leader of the Resistance...
a man known as "The Torch."
Until then, wait at
the Howard Johnson's.
It's on the corner of Der Fuehrer
Strasse and Goebbels Platzen.
Good luck, kind sir,
and God be with you.
Wait.
You dropped your phony dog poo.
What phony dog poo?
Souvenirs, novelties,
party tricks.
Driver, why have we stopped here?
This isn't the Howard Johnson's.
Good evening.
A table for two, please.
The name is Rivers.
Ah, yes, Mr. Rivers.
I have it right here.
But I'm afraid we require...
a jacket and tie
for the dining room.
If you like, we would be very happy
to provide you with one.
- Oh, that would be fine.
- Jurgen.
This way, sir.
Ah, General Streck,
Comrade Biletnikov.
I have your table ready for you.
Very good, Heinz.
As you know...
Comrade Biletnikov holds
a very high rank in the party.
We wish to afford him
every courtesy.
But of course, mein General.
Perhaps Comrade Biletnikov...
would be persuaded
to sing for us this evening.
I will take care of it.
Thank you.
Nick, I'm sorry I won't be able to
join you for dinner tonight.
I'm coming down with a sore throat,
so I've decided to turn in early.
Don't forget. You have to be
at the theater at 8:30.
- This doesn't help at all.
- Don't worry about it, Martin.
Go up to your room
and get some sleep.
- Is there anything you need?
- No, thanks.
I just wanted to make sure
you got those new arrangements.
Oh, yeah. I got them right here.
Oh, by the way...
I ordered that '84 Ripple Blanc
for you that they recommended.
- It's very good.
- Thanks.
Who do you favor
in the Virginia Slims tournament?
In women's tennis, I always
root against the heterosexual.
- Have you heard from Cedric?
- Yes, he was just here.
Wait in your hotel room.
He will meet you there.
This letter has to be
in New York by Tuesday.
Now go. Quickly.
Excuse me. I am sorry, madam...
but this evening is only
for guests of the cultural festival.
Your Ripple Blanc, sir.
I have explained to you...
Jurgen, escort this lady out.
Excuse me,
but this lady's with me.
Ah, Mr. Rivers.
A thousand pardons, madam.
After you, my dear.
You're just in time.
You know, I don't think I've ever
seen you looking so lovely.
Thank you.
That was very kind of you.
My pleasure. I was looking
for someone to dance with.
- You're an American.
- That's right.
- My uncle was born in America.
- Oh, really.
But he was one of the lucky ones.
He managed to escape in a balloon
during the Jimmy Carter presidency.
I bet he's got
a lot of great stories.
Yes.
He would tell me about all the
large houses and expensive cars...
and how the young people waste
their time watching television...
and listening
to rock-and-roll music.
What's wrong with television?
Not all television. MASH was okay,
and the old Mary Tyler Moore Show.
It just seems like the young people
of America take freedom for granted.
Now, wait a minute.
I don't think you're being fair.
You know, my history class
once spent...
an entire week in Philadelphia.
Maybe so. You can talk about freedom
all you want...
but still you don't know what
it's like to have to fight for it.
Perhaps my lecture was unwarranted.
I am grateful
for what you did back there.
Well, you know,
I think you'd really like America.
We've got the Liberty Bell,
Disneyland on both coasts.
It's happening.
I'm sorry.
I really don't know any German.
That's all right. I know a little
German. He's sitting over there.
Anything's fine.
- Thank you, um...
- Hillary.
Hillary.
That's an unusual name.
It's a German name. It means
"she whose bosoms defy gravity."
Pleased to meet you.
My name is Nick.
Nick? What does that mean?
Oh, nothing. My dad thought of it
while he was shaving.
Are you in some kind of trouble
with the police?
Some things are much better
left unsaid.
Like what?
Well, you know...
sometimes when you blow your nose
into a tissue...
and you put it in your purse,
then a little while later...
you have to reach in there
for your lipstick or something...
- and your hand gushes into it and...
- Okay, you're right.
Some things are better left unsaid.
Thank you very much.
Ladies and gentlemen...
we are fortunate
to have with us tonight...
a singer whose great talent...
is exceeded only by his devotion
to his country.
He truly has the gift of song,
a golden voice...
- inspired talent...
- Is there something wrong?
And a charming personality.
I was afraid something like this
might happen.
General Streck of the high command
is a most fervent admirer...
and owns a complete set
of his works.
Now, he is a very shy
and gentle man...
but perhaps we could persuade him
to sing for us.
Shall we ask him?
I'd better do what they want.
I promised my manager.
Thank you, sir.
Okay, watch the change
in the second chorus.
Oh, my God.
Tutti frutti au rutti
Got a girl named Sue
She knows just what to do
She knows how to love me
yes, indeed
Oh boy, you don't know
what you do to me
Tutti frutti au rutti
Got a girl named Daisy
She almost drive me crazy
She rocked me to the East
She rocked me to the West
But she's the girl
that I love best
Tutti frutti au rutti
Cedric!
Cedric, what have they done to you?
It was a trap.
They must have known I was
staying at the Howard Johnson's.
- But who did this?
- Never mind about that.
We've got to rescue your father
before it's too late.
But what are we going to do?
I was...
supposed to go
to the ballet tonight...
meet a man called "The Torch."
Thank you.
He's the leader of the Resistance.
He'll help us find your father.
- I'll go.
- No, you can't go.
It's too dangerous.
But I must.
He'll be tortured.
All right, but be very careful
at the ballet.
- Where is the ticket?
- In the glove compartment.
Can you reach it from the inside?
How about the other hand?
Oh, no, that's not it.
Let me try.
Here it is.
- We've got to get out of here.
- We oughta wait for the police.
That was the police!
In here!
Here. We can get out this way.
Wait a minute.
First you can explain a few things.
I'm not sure I can.
I only know I've put you
in great danger.
Please trust me.
You must come with me!
Look, I don't know
what kind of trouble you're in...
but don't worry about me,
I'm a guest of the government.
- I can explain everything.
- You're mistaken. They'll put you...
Go while you still can.
They can't do anything to me.
Martin!
Boy, am I glad to see you.
I've been here 20 minutes already.
Nick, I tried everything.
The embassy, the German government,
the consulate...
I even talked to the UN ambassador.
It's no use.
I just can't
bring my wife to orgasm.
Gee, that's a shame, Martin.
Well, have you tried one of these?
Wow. Well, thanks.
I'll give it a whirl.
Now listen, Martin. I'm getting
a little worried about this place.
I don't think they've
ever even heard of a trial.
All I know is after you left
the cafe last night, I met a girl.
Then, later at the ballet,
she's sitting all alone.
Then all of a sudden I see a guy
who has a gun at her head...
and he's looking like
he's gonna kill her.
And he might have
if I hadn't stepped in.
There's gotta be
someone you can call...
that can straighten this mess out.
I figure they gotta let you out
for your concert Friday night.
They're beaming it live by satellite
to 85 countries.
Now, you just relax. And remember,
there's nothing to worry about.
Amen.
We wish to impress upon you,
Mr. Rivers...
that we have methods of dealing
with those who will not cooperate.
Now for the last time,
why did you attack Sergeant Kruger?
I didn't know who it was.
I just saw him pull a gun on a girl.
Might I remind you, Mr. Rivers...
that the penalty for murder
is death by firing squad.
Let us hope for your sake
that Sgt. Kruger survives.
Ja.
It is the hospital,
mein General.
What is the condition
of Sgt. Kruger?
Yes. I see.
Well, let me know if there's
any change in his condition.
He's dead.
I'm afraid you leave me no
alternative but to introduce you...
to two of my associates.
Bruno is almost blind...
has to operate wholly by touch.
Klaus is a moron who knows only
what he reads in the New York Post.
I believe they never let a man
lose consciousness...
how ever long
they may work upon him.
You don't scare me.
My manager is on his way right now
to the American consulate.
Do not be so sure, Mr. Rivers.
Evidently, your friend did not
realize that here in East Germany...
we use 220-volt current.
He was found in his hotel room...
impaled upon
a large electrical device.
Our surgeons did what they could...
but it took them two hours
just to get the smile off his face.
Perhaps the American
has chosen to reconsider.
Make sure they leave no marks.
Do you know which room
the final chemistry exam is in?
All the exams are over.
Haven't you been to class?
- No!
- But it's the end of the semester.
No. No, I haven't studied.
Oh, no, I'm back in school.
I can't believe
I'm back in school.
Thank God.
- Well?
- They're still working on him.
He won't break.
They've tried everything.
Do you want me to bring out
the LeRoy Neiman paintings?
No. We cannot risk violating
the Geneva Convention.
We'll break him tomorrow.
Who are you?
What are you doing here?
My name is Nick Rivers.
- Who are you?
- I am Dr. Paul Flammond.
I am a prisoner here
just like you, my son.
You see, a year ago,
I was close to perfecting...
the first magnetic
desalinization process...
so revolutionary, it was capable
of removing the salt...
from over 500 million gallons
of seawater a day.
Do you realize
what that could mean...
to the starving nations
of the earth?
Wow. They'd have enough salt
to last forever.
Then one night, the secret police
broke into my house...
tore me from my family,
ransacked my laboratory...
and brought me to this dungeon.
That sucks.
For the first time in my life...
I am ashamed of being a scientist.
- What do you mean?
- They are forcing me...
- to create a horrible weapon.
- Can't you refuse?
I wish I could,
but they are holding my daughter.
They'll kill her unless I complete
the Polaris Mine by Sunday.
Sunday?
That's Simchas Torah.
And the day
the entire NATO submarine fleet...
passes through
the Straits of Gibraltar.
Is this the Polaris Mine?
Yes. By Sunday, I will be able to
arm it with a nuclear warhead.
- How does it work?
- It is a magnetic mine.
So powerful, it will attract itself
to submarines miles away.
- How about that.
- Oh, no!
You must go now.
If they find out you've seen this...
your life will be worth less
than a load of dead rats...
in a tampon factory.
Right away!
- Von Host.
- Ja, mein General.
The government wishes to avoid
an international incident.
Mr. Rivers must be allowed
to perform his concert tonight.
He's to be executed
this very minute.
It'll have to wait.
Call them at once.
Ja, mein General.
How silly can you get
Yeah, yeah
How silly can you get
Ooh, yeah
I never ever meant tO stray
but when she looked at me that way
The night was young and gay Paree
made me forget
I went to Paris in France
I found a little romance
She was a-walkin'
down the boulevard
I know I shoulda been good
I never thought that I would
Be double-crossin', baby
Cross my heart
A little rockin'
and a little wine
Stopped me thinking
about a little valentine
What's a lonely boy to do
She looked so fine
How silly can you get
Yeah, yeah
How silly can you get
Ooh, yeah
I never ever meant tO stray
but when she looked at me that way
The night was young and gay Paree
made me forget
How silly can you get
Yeah, yeah
How silly can you get
Ooh, yeah
No more foolin'around, you bet
How silly can you get
I can't believe it's true
That I just met a girl like
YOu
Each night I'm all alone
My heart's an empty home
To see you standing there
would be my only prayer
You set my heart on fire
It's burning with desire
Your touch, your lips, your soul
You make me lose control
Baby, please
Baby, please
Baby, please
Spend this night with me
Spend this night with me
I can't believe it's true
I met a girl like you
In heaven we would be
If you would spend
this night with me
If you would spend
this night with me
Darling, I'm here to say
I pray there'll come a day
When by my side, you'll stay
When you, you will always be
A love that's true to me
You set my heart on fire
It's burning with desire
Your touch, your lips, your soul
Mm, you make me lose control
Baby, please
- Baby, please.
- Baby, please, baby, please
Spend this night with me
- Oh, baby, baby, please.
- Baby, please
Don't you understand I need you?
I can't live without you.
I'm gonna say something
I've never said before.
I even love ya.
Oh, it's just no use.
I'm beggin' you, darlin'.
I can't face another day
without you.
Oh, honey lamb, I'm afraid.
Don't you understand
I'm losing my very mind?
I gotta have you with me.
I'm in such a complete anguish
without you.
Oh, sugar drawers.
Baby, I'm standin'
at the great abyss of love...
- and I'm teeterin'
- Baby, please, baby, please
Oh, dumpling, I promise
I'll even be nice to your mama.
Baby, please
Spend this night
With me
Ooh-wah
Those bikes!
That is no excuse.
Search the road again.
They're in the eastern sector.
I want the whole area sealed off.
Now, there's a used book store
somewhere around here.
The owner is a member
of the Resistance.
- If we can find him...
- Resistance? Wait a minute.
Don't you think it's about time
you told me what this is all about?
I'm sorry. I guess
I do owe you an explanation.
You see, only a year ago...
I was teaching
a course in Black History...
at the University of Blaupunkt.
And then one night,
I came home to find...
that my father had been arrested
by the secret police.
I've been trying to
find him ever since.
Wait a minute.
That's Dr. Flammond.
I saw him yesterday
in Flurgendorf Prison.
Flurgendorf Prison?
Is he all right?
- Yes, he looks fine.
- Thank God he's safe.
We must get this information
to the Resistance.
- Maybe they can help us.
- Okay, let's go.
There it is.
It's a Swedish bookstore.
That's okay.
Don't feel bad.
It happens to lots of men
the first time.
Just relax.
I'll pour you a drink.
We can always try again
in a couple of hours...
"she said, as she laid down
beside him and caressed his chest."
Can you believe
they print this trash?
Can you believe
they print this trash?
Don't worry about it.
You were going to tell me
something about your childhood.
Oh, yes.
When I was just a young girl...
my uncle took me
on a tropical cruise.
But there was a terrible storm,
and the boat sank.
I managed to swim
to a deserted island...
with a young boy named Nigel.
Together, we had to
learn to survive.
Fortunately, the ocean
provided its bounty...
which Nigel would catch every day.
Later, I would forage inland
for fruit and vegetables...
from the endless varieties
of trees...
and bushes
found all over the island.
Then we busied ourselves,
chopping palm fronds...
and lacing them to bamboo
with dried seaweed and snot.
This not only provided us
with a safe haven from the rain...
but sheltered us from the
relentless Santa Ana winds...
which would periodically
ravage the island.
The years passed,
and as we grew up...
we began to notice strange,
new feelings awakening within us.
There was no one around
to explain this.
We had to learn by ourselves.
Then one day he went fishing.
That was the last
I ever saw of Nigel.
I spent months by myself
on that island...
until I was finally rescued
by a passing ship.
I'll never forget
my feeling of relief.
You can't imagine what it's like
to be separated from your family...
at such a young age.
I think I can.
You see, when I was
about six years old...
my mama took me
on a trip to the city.
We went to one of those
big old department stores...
and I got lost.
They tried to page her,
but the PA system was on the fritz.
I never saw my mama again.
People from
the cosmetics department...
fed me a bowl of soup
and some bread.
Days stretched into weeks.
One February,
they got pretty jammed up...
during the semiannual
Lincoln's Birthday sale...
and they asked me to help out
in Preteen Maternity.
Then one day I overheard
a conversation in Personnel...
about them needing a new jingle
for their radio ad.
So, I picked up my guitar
and I wrote down a tune...
that had been mullin' and creepin'
and crawlin' around in my head.
It went something like this.
Are you lonesome tonight
Is your kitchen a sight
Is your wardrobe
All run-down and bare
Is your lipstick all smeared
Are your stockings not sheer
Do they make your legs
show all your hair
Do the tears on your pillow
Roll down as you turn
Do they short out the blanket
And make the sheets burn
Is your heart filled with pain
Will you come back again
Shop at Macy's
and love me tonight
Whoa!
All right, this is it.
I must leave you here.
Go now. Quickly!
- Is he all right?
- He caught a cold the other day.
He's just a little hoarse.
Giddap, Mario. Whoa!
It's been a hard day's night
And I've been working
like a dog
But when I get home to you
- Yes?
- Is this the potato farm?
Yes. I am Albert Potato.
Who are you?
We were sent by Sven Jorgensen.
Come this way.
What do you want?
We want to see "The Torch."
No one is allowed
to see "The Torch."
But we have important information
about my father, Dr. Paul Flammond.
We shall see.
- Nigel!
- Hillary!
It is you.
Oh, my darling Hillary, if only you
knew how I've yearned for this day.
Oh, my darling Hillary, if only you
knew how I've yearned for this day.
Sleepless nights, lonely hours...
hoping, praying that once more...
I would be able to gaze
into your ravishing brown eyes.
Who is this I should thank
for bringing you back to me?
Oh, Nigel, this is Nick.
Nick Rivers.
He is a friend.
Forgive us, Mr. Rivers, if we
have been less than hospitable...
but recently we've had reason to
believe that there is a traitor...
somewhere in the Resistance.
Du Quois, introduce the American
to the men.
Very well.
This is Chevalier...
Montage...
Dtente...
Avant-garde...
and Dj Vu.
Have we not met before, monsieur?
I don't think so.
Over there, Croissant...
Souffl, Escargot...
and Chocolate Mousse.
Now, Mr. Rivers,
what is the news that you bring us?
I've seen Dr. Flammond
in Flurgendorf Prison.
- Flurgendorf Prison?
- He told me the Polaris Mine...
- will be ready on Sunday.
- Sunday?
We'll have to move out tonight.
I'll be back in a moment,
my darling.
- Prepare the gear for the jump.
- Arc de Triomph!
- Cordon bleu.
- Nick, I want to explain.
- What's there to explain?
- I just want to say that...
I'm not the first guy who fell in
love with a girl in a restaurant...
who turned out to be the daughter
of a kidnapped scientist...
only to lose her
to a childhood lover...
she'd last seen
on a deserted island...
and turned out 15 years later to be
leader of the French underground.
I know. It all sounds
like some bad movie.
Forget it.
It'll be better for everyone
if we forget what's happened.
Mr. Rivers, we've arranged
for your safe transportation...
across the border tonight.
It's the least we can do
to show our gratitude.
Come, my darling.
Let me show you what I've done
to the fallout shelter.
Do not take it so hard, Nick.
Life is filled
with its little miseries.
Each of us, in his own way,
must learn to deal with adversity...
in a mature and adult fashion.
- Mind if I have a swig of this?
- Go right ahead.
- What the hell is this stuff?
- Gasoline.
Don't worry, my darling. I'm sure
your friend will get over it.
He seems a good chap, really.
But, Hillary, how wonderful
you've returned to me now...
when I so desperately need you
by my side to fight for the cause.
- Our cause.
- Oh, Nigel, I am proud of you.
But I'm so confused.
All these years
I thought you were dead.
And by all rights, I should be.
I floated at sea for days
nearly unconscious.
As luck would have it, I was
picked up by a passing freighter.
Of course, I tried to get them
to come back to save you too...
but it was a foreign ship
and they didn't understand English.
I yelled and screamed, but it only
seemed to excite them all the more.
They took advantage of me
in ways that I cannot describe.
Oh, Nigel.
It must have been awful!
Latrine!
What did you find out, Latrine?
Where are the others?
Oh, we never had a chance.
It was a slaughter.
We must put a stop
to these afternoon football games.
Which direction
were they coming from?
Up the road.
Take cover!
Oh, my God.
They're gonna kill us all.
Here, take this.
Grenade!
We're running out of time.
The plane will not wait for us.
We'll have to make
a break for it.
Rendezvous at the cafe
near the landing field.
Wait.
Nice shooting.
My man!
Good, you've made it.
Now everybody's accounted for.
Here's the plan.
We'll be taking off at 0100 hours.
What about the American?
A truck will drive by here
at exactly midnight.
You will jump on the back
and be driven to the border.
Wait. Nick is the only one who
knows the inside of that prison.
Well, Monsieur Rivers...
it seems
that you have become...
how do you say, indispensable?
Indispensable.
That's what I thought.
Sorry, fellas. I've done my time
in Flurgendorf Prison.
I got a truck to meet.
Nick, you can ask any price
you want, but you must help us.
Seems as long as I know
my way around that prison...
I'll never be lonely.
Nick, I know
how you feel about me...
but I'm asking you
to put your feelings aside...
for something more important.
Do I have to hear again...
what a great cause you
and Nigel are fighting for?
- But this was your cause too.
- My only cause is my music.
That's exactly what I mean.
Didn't you see the eyes of
those kids at your concert?
Oh, Nick, you must help us.
If not for me,
for the cause of freedom.
Latrine!
A traitor in our midst.
Well done, Latrine.
I see you have
dealt with him appropriately.
Not the bird, you fool!
This is a carrier pigeon on
its way to German headquarters.
Look. A message.
"Resistance planning
to free Flammond...
Sunday, 0800 hours."
That means the traitor
is someone at this table.
Excuse me,
but aren't you Nick Rivers...
the American rock-and-roll star?
No, I'm not.
But you must be.
Won't you sing us just one song?
I'm sorry. You must have me
confused with somebody else.
I'm Mel Torme.
That was close.
Perhaps a bit too close.
What do you mean?
We have absolutely no proof that
this man is who he claims to be.
And yet we're asking him
to lead us...
into the most heavily guarded
prison in Germany.
Why, Nigel, that's absurd.
Just a moment, my darling.
We know he came to us
with no credentials.
We know the Germans never knew
the location of our headquarters...
until he arrived.
And we know that we've been
infiltrated by a traitor.
Nigel, what are you saying?
How do we know
he's not Mel Torme?
Eva, look.
He's at the jukebox.
Well, get out on that floor
and hit that rug tonight
Well, get out on that floor
and hit that rug tonight
We're gonna shake that rug
till the early, early light
I said romp and stomp and slide
like a devil on a thread
Yeah
I said romp and stomp
And slide like a devil
on a thread
Well, stand back, baby
I believe I'm gonna fray my edge
You gotta straighten the rug
Yeah, straighten the rug
You gotta give it a push
Yeah, give it a shove
Well, rug cuttin', honey
Now, baby, won't you give it a tug
You better watch the mean old rug
don't bite you back
You better watch that mean old rug
don't bite you back
Yeah, I'm tellin'you, baby
it ain't no backdoor mat
You gotta straighten the rug
Yeah, straighten it out
You gotta give it a shove
Yeah, scream and shout
Well, rug cuttin', honey
you know what I'm talkin'about
Well, rug cuttin', honey
come on, let's straighten it out
And there's nobody
I'd rather straighten it with
Than you
This is not Mel Torme.
Oh, Nick.
Yes?
We don't know what's going
to happen down there.
This may be the last time
I'll see you...
and there's something
I wanted to say.
- You don't have to say anything.
- But I want to.
You must know that when
we were together last night...
I had no idea
that Nigel was still alive.
And now that you know?
Nick, his work
is so important to him.
I must stay with him.
He pleaded with me
not to leave.
I just hope you realize
that's all he means to me.
Oh, I don't know
what's right any longer.
I only wish
I didn't love you so much!
I've spotted the herd.
They're the key to the whole plan.
Now, we're here.
Every morning at 7:15,
the prison guards bring the cows...
from here, up this road
towards the prison...
for their morning milking.
Du Quois and I will merge
with the herd here...
and sneak in through the gate
and the electrified fence.
Then we'll break away
from the other cows...
and enter
the generator building here.
At exactly 7:25...
we cut the power.
Then the rest of you
come through here...
scale this wall, and Nick
can lead you to Flammond's cell.
Meanwhile, Hillary will steal this
truck by the railway crossing...
and pick us up back here.
Then we'll drive to the landing
field and the waiting plane.
Let's go.
No, you take the head.
I'm taking the back.
- But the plan was...
- Forget the plan.
I'm giving the orders here.
Shut up and give me the back half.
All right.
Be an asshole.
Here they come.
Okay, let's move out.
All right, let's go.
Double time.
We only have five minutes
to get to the circuit box...
and throw the switch.
We've got to hurry.
Can you see the gate?
- Yes. It's just ahead.
- Where are the guards?
I can only see one.
- Ow!
- Ja there, girl! Move along!
Stay behind the guards.
Once we get around this corner,
we'll break away from the herd.
Okay, now!
I think we did it.
- Can you see the generator?
- Yes, it's over there...
behind the feed bin.
All right, let's go.
We've got to hurry.
Nigel? You okay?
- Oh, yeah.
- Let's go.
What's the hurry?
Why are we always
in such a bloody rush?
I just wanted to stop
to take a rest.
The guards have passed.
All right. How long
till they cut the power?
Three more minutes...
and we can cut the wire.
There it is.
Lovely.
You're all right now.
I'm here.
Yeah, it's all right.
Ow!
Hey.
Here, here.
- Nigel, what are you doing?
- Never you mind.
Why do you want to go back
to the meter shed?
We're going
to turn the power back on.
But that will set off the alarm.
The others will be trapped.
I refuse.
Oh?
This gun in your back
says you won't.
Now, move!
So, it is you
who is a traitor.
Don't take it too badly,
old boy.
You're no more of a fool
than the others.
Now, get over there
and pull that...
Dr. Flammond!
- We're taking you out of here.
- But my daughter.
- Hillary's safe. She's with us.
- Thank God.
But how ironic. Another day and
I would have completed my tunnel.
Nice work.
- Very clever, my darling.
- Nigel!
You seem to have put the pieces
together very nicely...
but unfortunately
it's too late for you...
and the others.
But, Nigel, how could you?
It wasn't very difficult.
I could have returned to rescue you
from that wretched island...
but it would have meant leaving
my newfound comrades.
Comrades?
Yes. It was a Russian ship.
They taught me all about
you imperialist swine.
I was exposed to the works
of great thinkers...
Karl Marx, Lenin,
L. Ron Hubbard, Freddie Laker.
Now, get into the truck.
We're going for a ride.
- Where's the truck?
- Where's Hillary?
- I'm hungry.
- Du Quois!
What happened?
Nigel made me go back
to the meter shed...
ordered me
to set off the alarm.
And what does he want us
to do now?
Nothing, you numbskull.
Nigel's a traitor!
Latrine!
- What happened?
- Nigel took Hillary in truck.
That way.
I cannot leave the country
without my daughter.
I'm going after them.
I'll meet you at the landing field.
Whether you make it back or not,
that plane must take off...
with Dr. Flammond
at 1800 hours.
We recommend you be there at least
especially at this time of year.
Good luck, Nick.
Let's go.
Good luck.
You've got to hand it
to the Germans.
They make great cars.
Good-bye.
There's no more time.
We've got to take off now.
I will not leave
without my daughter.
Listen, old chap.
In a few minutes, it'll be dawn...
then we'll be sitting ducks
to their antiaircraft guns.
Wait.
There they are!
Oh, Father,
thank God you're safe!
My darling. How I feared
I would never see you again.
I am so proud of you,
my beloved.
There'll be time to talk
on the plane. You'd better hurry.
But I can't go on that plane.
- But, Hillary...
- No, Father. I'm needed here.
For as long as a single man
is forced to cower...
under the iron fist
of oppression...
as long as a child
cries out in the night...
or an actor
can be elected president...
we must continue the struggle.
No, Hillary.
It is much too dangerous
for you in Germany now.
Yes. Go with Nick.
Don't worry about us.
We will hear his music
on the Voice of America.
We will hear it in the hearts
of the people...
and in elevators everywhere.
And as long as we do,
we know that we are not alone...
in our fight.
They're right, Hillary.
- And when we get to America...
- Who knows what will be then.
- Everything's gonna be fine.
- Things change.
People change.
Hairstyles change.
Hillary,
I want you to be with me.
Interest rates fluctuate.
Who knows?
Don't you want to come with me?
If you don't, say so now.
Want?
Want.
More than anything!
Take me with you.
Good-bye, Chocolate Mousse.
I'll never forget you.
Good-bye, Du Quois.
Take care of yourself.
Good-bye, Dj Vu.
I'll always remember you.
And I'll miss you most of all,
Scarecrow.
I can't believe it's true
I met a girl like you
In heaven we would be
If you would spend
this night with me
If you would spend
this night with me
Darling, I'm here to say
I pray there'll come a day
When by my side you'll stay
And you, you will always be
A love that's true to me
You set my heart on fire
It's burning with desire
Your touch, your lips, your soul
Ooh, you make me lose control
Baby, please
Baby, please
Spend this night with me
Baby, please
Spend this night
With me
Ooh-wah
THE END
throughout the country.
All borders have been placed
on full alert.
Exit visas have been suspended
for the entire week.
In addition,
we have received assurances...
from our undercover agents
in the West...
that our actions to date
have gone completely undetected.
All military leaves
have been canceled...
and we have doubled the guard
around Dr. Flammond.
And finally, all systems...
are in readiness for deployment
of the Polaris Mine.
Just as you ordered,
General Streck.
Well done, Von Horst.
By Sunday, the entire
NATO submarine fleet...
will be here on their maneuvers
and completely vulnerable.
Major Crumpler...
what is the progress
of our diversionary plan?
The schedule
for the cultural festival...
is now complete, Herr General.
And you should be pleased to note
that at your personal request...
the Soviets have agreed to send
their celebrated tenor...
Vladimir Biletnikov.
Well done, Herr Major.
Then everything has gone
according to the plan.
Well, not exactly, mein General.
The American, Leonard Bernstein,
unfortunately has had to cancel.
But they are sending
another performer in his place.
In fact, we have just received...
this copy
of his most recent record album.
His name is Nick Rivers.
I'm sure he will be quite adequate.
As long as
the attention of the world...
is firmly fixed
on our cultural festival...
no one will know
what is about to happen.
And once again, Germany will become
united under one rule... ours!
After Sunday, there will be
no one to stop us!
Skeet surfin'
If everybody had a 12-gauge
And a surfboard too
You'd see 'em shootin'and surfin'
From here to Malibu
Because it's totally bitchin'
Ridin' waves to blast the pigeons
And it's so neat shooting skeet...
While you're riding
on the heavies all day
First wave, don't get tired
Second wave, aim higher
Third wave, pull and fire
- Skeet surfin'
- It's all right
Waxin'down our surfboards
And loadin'up our traps
Tell the teacher we're shootin'
We're never comin'back
I've got a gun rack in my Chevy
For when the surf
and the flak get heavy
And we'll have fun with our guns...
Till our lifeguard
takes our ammo away
First wave, don't get tired
Second wave, aim higher
Third wave, pull and fire
- Skeet surfin'
- It's all right
First wave, get the knack
Second wave, pull the trap
Third wave, how's that
- Skeet surfin'
- It's all right
Sharing sunsets
with my favorite girl
When we shoot the curl
we really shoot the curl
First wave, don't get tired
Second wave, aim higher
Third wave, pull and fire
- Skeet surfin'
- It's all right
First wave, get the knack
Second wave, pull the trap
Third wave, how's that
I wish they all could be
double-barrel
Wish they all could be
double-barrel guns
Skeet surfin', can't you see
Do you wanna come along with me
Skeet surfin', can't you see
Do you wanna come along with me
Skeet surfin', it's all right
Little girl
we'll have fun tonight
Skeet surfin', can't you see
Do you wanna come along with me
Grab your board
and run to your gun
A pen.
A pen.
A table.
A table.
The pen is on the table.
There is sauerkraut
in my lederhosen.
Come in.
What did he say?
I think we're at
the East German checkpoint.
Better have our passports ready.
Now remember, Nick,
this is the first time...
rock music has ever been allowed
in this country.
So, you're not just a performer,
you're an ambassador...
representing America.
And above all, remember,
we've got to play by their rules.
Martin, I've been practicing.
How's this?
- What does that mean?
- Is your daughter 18?
Your papers, please.
Mr. Nick Rivers.
We've been awaiting the arrival
of the famous American singer.
Come here!
- Where are they taking him?
- They are not taking him anywhere.
Do not let your American curiosity
lead you into trouble, Mr. Rivers.
You are a guest here
only because it serves our purposes.
I suggest that during your stay...
it would be wise
to keep to your own affairs.
Good day.
- What the hell did you say to him?
- Nothing.
I just told him I put his name
on the Montgomery Ward mailing list.
I'm sorry. He's just
a little tired from the trip.
Normally, he wouldn't have said...
Your attitude is being noted,
Mr. Rivers.
If that was your idea
of being an ambassador...
we're headed for a lot of trouble.
I want a schnauzer
with my Wiener schnitzel.
Souvenirs, novelties,
party tricks.
Souvenirs, novelties,
party tricks.
Do you know any good white
basketball players?
There are no good white
basketball players, my friend.
There was trouble
on the Berlin Express.
They knew I was on that train.
We suspect there is a traitor
somewhere in the Resistance.
We must proceed, nonetheless.
There is too much at stake.
Here, kind sir,
smell this flower.
It never fails
to amuse at parties.
That's very good.
The Germans are planning something.
Time is running out.
Have you found out
where Dr. Flammond is being kept?
Here. This is one of
our most popular items.
That's very good, ja.
We do not know where
they are keeping Dr. Flammond...
only that they are forcing him
to build a new weapon.
What are my instructions?
Here. Here. Try this.
This will make you very popular
at social gatherings.
Go tonight to the ballet.
Here. Use this ticket.
You will meet
the leader of the Resistance...
a man known as "The Torch."
Until then, wait at
the Howard Johnson's.
It's on the corner of Der Fuehrer
Strasse and Goebbels Platzen.
Good luck, kind sir,
and God be with you.
Wait.
You dropped your phony dog poo.
What phony dog poo?
Souvenirs, novelties,
party tricks.
Driver, why have we stopped here?
This isn't the Howard Johnson's.
Good evening.
A table for two, please.
The name is Rivers.
Ah, yes, Mr. Rivers.
I have it right here.
But I'm afraid we require...
a jacket and tie
for the dining room.
If you like, we would be very happy
to provide you with one.
- Oh, that would be fine.
- Jurgen.
This way, sir.
Ah, General Streck,
Comrade Biletnikov.
I have your table ready for you.
Very good, Heinz.
As you know...
Comrade Biletnikov holds
a very high rank in the party.
We wish to afford him
every courtesy.
But of course, mein General.
Perhaps Comrade Biletnikov...
would be persuaded
to sing for us this evening.
I will take care of it.
Thank you.
Nick, I'm sorry I won't be able to
join you for dinner tonight.
I'm coming down with a sore throat,
so I've decided to turn in early.
Don't forget. You have to be
at the theater at 8:30.
- This doesn't help at all.
- Don't worry about it, Martin.
Go up to your room
and get some sleep.
- Is there anything you need?
- No, thanks.
I just wanted to make sure
you got those new arrangements.
Oh, yeah. I got them right here.
Oh, by the way...
I ordered that '84 Ripple Blanc
for you that they recommended.
- It's very good.
- Thanks.
Who do you favor
in the Virginia Slims tournament?
In women's tennis, I always
root against the heterosexual.
- Have you heard from Cedric?
- Yes, he was just here.
Wait in your hotel room.
He will meet you there.
This letter has to be
in New York by Tuesday.
Now go. Quickly.
Excuse me. I am sorry, madam...
but this evening is only
for guests of the cultural festival.
Your Ripple Blanc, sir.
I have explained to you...
Jurgen, escort this lady out.
Excuse me,
but this lady's with me.
Ah, Mr. Rivers.
A thousand pardons, madam.
After you, my dear.
You're just in time.
You know, I don't think I've ever
seen you looking so lovely.
Thank you.
That was very kind of you.
My pleasure. I was looking
for someone to dance with.
- You're an American.
- That's right.
- My uncle was born in America.
- Oh, really.
But he was one of the lucky ones.
He managed to escape in a balloon
during the Jimmy Carter presidency.
I bet he's got
a lot of great stories.
Yes.
He would tell me about all the
large houses and expensive cars...
and how the young people waste
their time watching television...
and listening
to rock-and-roll music.
What's wrong with television?
Not all television. MASH was okay,
and the old Mary Tyler Moore Show.
It just seems like the young people
of America take freedom for granted.
Now, wait a minute.
I don't think you're being fair.
You know, my history class
once spent...
an entire week in Philadelphia.
Maybe so. You can talk about freedom
all you want...
but still you don't know what
it's like to have to fight for it.
Perhaps my lecture was unwarranted.
I am grateful
for what you did back there.
Well, you know,
I think you'd really like America.
We've got the Liberty Bell,
Disneyland on both coasts.
It's happening.
I'm sorry.
I really don't know any German.
That's all right. I know a little
German. He's sitting over there.
Anything's fine.
- Thank you, um...
- Hillary.
Hillary.
That's an unusual name.
It's a German name. It means
"she whose bosoms defy gravity."
Pleased to meet you.
My name is Nick.
Nick? What does that mean?
Oh, nothing. My dad thought of it
while he was shaving.
Are you in some kind of trouble
with the police?
Some things are much better
left unsaid.
Like what?
Well, you know...
sometimes when you blow your nose
into a tissue...
and you put it in your purse,
then a little while later...
you have to reach in there
for your lipstick or something...
- and your hand gushes into it and...
- Okay, you're right.
Some things are better left unsaid.
Thank you very much.
Ladies and gentlemen...
we are fortunate
to have with us tonight...
a singer whose great talent...
is exceeded only by his devotion
to his country.
He truly has the gift of song,
a golden voice...
- inspired talent...
- Is there something wrong?
And a charming personality.
I was afraid something like this
might happen.
General Streck of the high command
is a most fervent admirer...
and owns a complete set
of his works.
Now, he is a very shy
and gentle man...
but perhaps we could persuade him
to sing for us.
Shall we ask him?
I'd better do what they want.
I promised my manager.
Thank you, sir.
Okay, watch the change
in the second chorus.
Oh, my God.
Tutti frutti au rutti
Got a girl named Sue
She knows just what to do
She knows how to love me
yes, indeed
Oh boy, you don't know
what you do to me
Tutti frutti au rutti
Got a girl named Daisy
She almost drive me crazy
She rocked me to the East
She rocked me to the West
But she's the girl
that I love best
Tutti frutti au rutti
Cedric!
Cedric, what have they done to you?
It was a trap.
They must have known I was
staying at the Howard Johnson's.
- But who did this?
- Never mind about that.
We've got to rescue your father
before it's too late.
But what are we going to do?
I was...
supposed to go
to the ballet tonight...
meet a man called "The Torch."
Thank you.
He's the leader of the Resistance.
He'll help us find your father.
- I'll go.
- No, you can't go.
It's too dangerous.
But I must.
He'll be tortured.
All right, but be very careful
at the ballet.
- Where is the ticket?
- In the glove compartment.
Can you reach it from the inside?
How about the other hand?
Oh, no, that's not it.
Let me try.
Here it is.
- We've got to get out of here.
- We oughta wait for the police.
That was the police!
In here!
Here. We can get out this way.
Wait a minute.
First you can explain a few things.
I'm not sure I can.
I only know I've put you
in great danger.
Please trust me.
You must come with me!
Look, I don't know
what kind of trouble you're in...
but don't worry about me,
I'm a guest of the government.
- I can explain everything.
- You're mistaken. They'll put you...
Go while you still can.
They can't do anything to me.
Martin!
Boy, am I glad to see you.
I've been here 20 minutes already.
Nick, I tried everything.
The embassy, the German government,
the consulate...
I even talked to the UN ambassador.
It's no use.
I just can't
bring my wife to orgasm.
Gee, that's a shame, Martin.
Well, have you tried one of these?
Wow. Well, thanks.
I'll give it a whirl.
Now listen, Martin. I'm getting
a little worried about this place.
I don't think they've
ever even heard of a trial.
All I know is after you left
the cafe last night, I met a girl.
Then, later at the ballet,
she's sitting all alone.
Then all of a sudden I see a guy
who has a gun at her head...
and he's looking like
he's gonna kill her.
And he might have
if I hadn't stepped in.
There's gotta be
someone you can call...
that can straighten this mess out.
I figure they gotta let you out
for your concert Friday night.
They're beaming it live by satellite
to 85 countries.
Now, you just relax. And remember,
there's nothing to worry about.
Amen.
We wish to impress upon you,
Mr. Rivers...
that we have methods of dealing
with those who will not cooperate.
Now for the last time,
why did you attack Sergeant Kruger?
I didn't know who it was.
I just saw him pull a gun on a girl.
Might I remind you, Mr. Rivers...
that the penalty for murder
is death by firing squad.
Let us hope for your sake
that Sgt. Kruger survives.
Ja.
It is the hospital,
mein General.
What is the condition
of Sgt. Kruger?
Yes. I see.
Well, let me know if there's
any change in his condition.
He's dead.
I'm afraid you leave me no
alternative but to introduce you...
to two of my associates.
Bruno is almost blind...
has to operate wholly by touch.
Klaus is a moron who knows only
what he reads in the New York Post.
I believe they never let a man
lose consciousness...
how ever long
they may work upon him.
You don't scare me.
My manager is on his way right now
to the American consulate.
Do not be so sure, Mr. Rivers.
Evidently, your friend did not
realize that here in East Germany...
we use 220-volt current.
He was found in his hotel room...
impaled upon
a large electrical device.
Our surgeons did what they could...
but it took them two hours
just to get the smile off his face.
Perhaps the American
has chosen to reconsider.
Make sure they leave no marks.
Do you know which room
the final chemistry exam is in?
All the exams are over.
Haven't you been to class?
- No!
- But it's the end of the semester.
No. No, I haven't studied.
Oh, no, I'm back in school.
I can't believe
I'm back in school.
Thank God.
- Well?
- They're still working on him.
He won't break.
They've tried everything.
Do you want me to bring out
the LeRoy Neiman paintings?
No. We cannot risk violating
the Geneva Convention.
We'll break him tomorrow.
Who are you?
What are you doing here?
My name is Nick Rivers.
- Who are you?
- I am Dr. Paul Flammond.
I am a prisoner here
just like you, my son.
You see, a year ago,
I was close to perfecting...
the first magnetic
desalinization process...
so revolutionary, it was capable
of removing the salt...
from over 500 million gallons
of seawater a day.
Do you realize
what that could mean...
to the starving nations
of the earth?
Wow. They'd have enough salt
to last forever.
Then one night, the secret police
broke into my house...
tore me from my family,
ransacked my laboratory...
and brought me to this dungeon.
That sucks.
For the first time in my life...
I am ashamed of being a scientist.
- What do you mean?
- They are forcing me...
- to create a horrible weapon.
- Can't you refuse?
I wish I could,
but they are holding my daughter.
They'll kill her unless I complete
the Polaris Mine by Sunday.
Sunday?
That's Simchas Torah.
And the day
the entire NATO submarine fleet...
passes through
the Straits of Gibraltar.
Is this the Polaris Mine?
Yes. By Sunday, I will be able to
arm it with a nuclear warhead.
- How does it work?
- It is a magnetic mine.
So powerful, it will attract itself
to submarines miles away.
- How about that.
- Oh, no!
You must go now.
If they find out you've seen this...
your life will be worth less
than a load of dead rats...
in a tampon factory.
Right away!
- Von Host.
- Ja, mein General.
The government wishes to avoid
an international incident.
Mr. Rivers must be allowed
to perform his concert tonight.
He's to be executed
this very minute.
It'll have to wait.
Call them at once.
Ja, mein General.
How silly can you get
Yeah, yeah
How silly can you get
Ooh, yeah
I never ever meant tO stray
but when she looked at me that way
The night was young and gay Paree
made me forget
I went to Paris in France
I found a little romance
She was a-walkin'
down the boulevard
I know I shoulda been good
I never thought that I would
Be double-crossin', baby
Cross my heart
A little rockin'
and a little wine
Stopped me thinking
about a little valentine
What's a lonely boy to do
She looked so fine
How silly can you get
Yeah, yeah
How silly can you get
Ooh, yeah
I never ever meant tO stray
but when she looked at me that way
The night was young and gay Paree
made me forget
How silly can you get
Yeah, yeah
How silly can you get
Ooh, yeah
No more foolin'around, you bet
How silly can you get
I can't believe it's true
That I just met a girl like
YOu
Each night I'm all alone
My heart's an empty home
To see you standing there
would be my only prayer
You set my heart on fire
It's burning with desire
Your touch, your lips, your soul
You make me lose control
Baby, please
Baby, please
Baby, please
Spend this night with me
Spend this night with me
I can't believe it's true
I met a girl like you
In heaven we would be
If you would spend
this night with me
If you would spend
this night with me
Darling, I'm here to say
I pray there'll come a day
When by my side, you'll stay
When you, you will always be
A love that's true to me
You set my heart on fire
It's burning with desire
Your touch, your lips, your soul
Mm, you make me lose control
Baby, please
- Baby, please.
- Baby, please, baby, please
Spend this night with me
- Oh, baby, baby, please.
- Baby, please
Don't you understand I need you?
I can't live without you.
I'm gonna say something
I've never said before.
I even love ya.
Oh, it's just no use.
I'm beggin' you, darlin'.
I can't face another day
without you.
Oh, honey lamb, I'm afraid.
Don't you understand
I'm losing my very mind?
I gotta have you with me.
I'm in such a complete anguish
without you.
Oh, sugar drawers.
Baby, I'm standin'
at the great abyss of love...
- and I'm teeterin'
- Baby, please, baby, please
Oh, dumpling, I promise
I'll even be nice to your mama.
Baby, please
Spend this night
With me
Ooh-wah
Those bikes!
That is no excuse.
Search the road again.
They're in the eastern sector.
I want the whole area sealed off.
Now, there's a used book store
somewhere around here.
The owner is a member
of the Resistance.
- If we can find him...
- Resistance? Wait a minute.
Don't you think it's about time
you told me what this is all about?
I'm sorry. I guess
I do owe you an explanation.
You see, only a year ago...
I was teaching
a course in Black History...
at the University of Blaupunkt.
And then one night,
I came home to find...
that my father had been arrested
by the secret police.
I've been trying to
find him ever since.
Wait a minute.
That's Dr. Flammond.
I saw him yesterday
in Flurgendorf Prison.
Flurgendorf Prison?
Is he all right?
- Yes, he looks fine.
- Thank God he's safe.
We must get this information
to the Resistance.
- Maybe they can help us.
- Okay, let's go.
There it is.
It's a Swedish bookstore.
That's okay.
Don't feel bad.
It happens to lots of men
the first time.
Just relax.
I'll pour you a drink.
We can always try again
in a couple of hours...
"she said, as she laid down
beside him and caressed his chest."
Can you believe
they print this trash?
Can you believe
they print this trash?
Don't worry about it.
You were going to tell me
something about your childhood.
Oh, yes.
When I was just a young girl...
my uncle took me
on a tropical cruise.
But there was a terrible storm,
and the boat sank.
I managed to swim
to a deserted island...
with a young boy named Nigel.
Together, we had to
learn to survive.
Fortunately, the ocean
provided its bounty...
which Nigel would catch every day.
Later, I would forage inland
for fruit and vegetables...
from the endless varieties
of trees...
and bushes
found all over the island.
Then we busied ourselves,
chopping palm fronds...
and lacing them to bamboo
with dried seaweed and snot.
This not only provided us
with a safe haven from the rain...
but sheltered us from the
relentless Santa Ana winds...
which would periodically
ravage the island.
The years passed,
and as we grew up...
we began to notice strange,
new feelings awakening within us.
There was no one around
to explain this.
We had to learn by ourselves.
Then one day he went fishing.
That was the last
I ever saw of Nigel.
I spent months by myself
on that island...
until I was finally rescued
by a passing ship.
I'll never forget
my feeling of relief.
You can't imagine what it's like
to be separated from your family...
at such a young age.
I think I can.
You see, when I was
about six years old...
my mama took me
on a trip to the city.
We went to one of those
big old department stores...
and I got lost.
They tried to page her,
but the PA system was on the fritz.
I never saw my mama again.
People from
the cosmetics department...
fed me a bowl of soup
and some bread.
Days stretched into weeks.
One February,
they got pretty jammed up...
during the semiannual
Lincoln's Birthday sale...
and they asked me to help out
in Preteen Maternity.
Then one day I overheard
a conversation in Personnel...
about them needing a new jingle
for their radio ad.
So, I picked up my guitar
and I wrote down a tune...
that had been mullin' and creepin'
and crawlin' around in my head.
It went something like this.
Are you lonesome tonight
Is your kitchen a sight
Is your wardrobe
All run-down and bare
Is your lipstick all smeared
Are your stockings not sheer
Do they make your legs
show all your hair
Do the tears on your pillow
Roll down as you turn
Do they short out the blanket
And make the sheets burn
Is your heart filled with pain
Will you come back again
Shop at Macy's
and love me tonight
Whoa!
All right, this is it.
I must leave you here.
Go now. Quickly!
- Is he all right?
- He caught a cold the other day.
He's just a little hoarse.
Giddap, Mario. Whoa!
It's been a hard day's night
And I've been working
like a dog
But when I get home to you
- Yes?
- Is this the potato farm?
Yes. I am Albert Potato.
Who are you?
We were sent by Sven Jorgensen.
Come this way.
What do you want?
We want to see "The Torch."
No one is allowed
to see "The Torch."
But we have important information
about my father, Dr. Paul Flammond.
We shall see.
- Nigel!
- Hillary!
It is you.
Oh, my darling Hillary, if only you
knew how I've yearned for this day.
Oh, my darling Hillary, if only you
knew how I've yearned for this day.
Sleepless nights, lonely hours...
hoping, praying that once more...
I would be able to gaze
into your ravishing brown eyes.
Who is this I should thank
for bringing you back to me?
Oh, Nigel, this is Nick.
Nick Rivers.
He is a friend.
Forgive us, Mr. Rivers, if we
have been less than hospitable...
but recently we've had reason to
believe that there is a traitor...
somewhere in the Resistance.
Du Quois, introduce the American
to the men.
Very well.
This is Chevalier...
Montage...
Dtente...
Avant-garde...
and Dj Vu.
Have we not met before, monsieur?
I don't think so.
Over there, Croissant...
Souffl, Escargot...
and Chocolate Mousse.
Now, Mr. Rivers,
what is the news that you bring us?
I've seen Dr. Flammond
in Flurgendorf Prison.
- Flurgendorf Prison?
- He told me the Polaris Mine...
- will be ready on Sunday.
- Sunday?
We'll have to move out tonight.
I'll be back in a moment,
my darling.
- Prepare the gear for the jump.
- Arc de Triomph!
- Cordon bleu.
- Nick, I want to explain.
- What's there to explain?
- I just want to say that...
I'm not the first guy who fell in
love with a girl in a restaurant...
who turned out to be the daughter
of a kidnapped scientist...
only to lose her
to a childhood lover...
she'd last seen
on a deserted island...
and turned out 15 years later to be
leader of the French underground.
I know. It all sounds
like some bad movie.
Forget it.
It'll be better for everyone
if we forget what's happened.
Mr. Rivers, we've arranged
for your safe transportation...
across the border tonight.
It's the least we can do
to show our gratitude.
Come, my darling.
Let me show you what I've done
to the fallout shelter.
Do not take it so hard, Nick.
Life is filled
with its little miseries.
Each of us, in his own way,
must learn to deal with adversity...
in a mature and adult fashion.
- Mind if I have a swig of this?
- Go right ahead.
- What the hell is this stuff?
- Gasoline.
Don't worry, my darling. I'm sure
your friend will get over it.
He seems a good chap, really.
But, Hillary, how wonderful
you've returned to me now...
when I so desperately need you
by my side to fight for the cause.
- Our cause.
- Oh, Nigel, I am proud of you.
But I'm so confused.
All these years
I thought you were dead.
And by all rights, I should be.
I floated at sea for days
nearly unconscious.
As luck would have it, I was
picked up by a passing freighter.
Of course, I tried to get them
to come back to save you too...
but it was a foreign ship
and they didn't understand English.
I yelled and screamed, but it only
seemed to excite them all the more.
They took advantage of me
in ways that I cannot describe.
Oh, Nigel.
It must have been awful!
Latrine!
What did you find out, Latrine?
Where are the others?
Oh, we never had a chance.
It was a slaughter.
We must put a stop
to these afternoon football games.
Which direction
were they coming from?
Up the road.
Take cover!
Oh, my God.
They're gonna kill us all.
Here, take this.
Grenade!
We're running out of time.
The plane will not wait for us.
We'll have to make
a break for it.
Rendezvous at the cafe
near the landing field.
Wait.
Nice shooting.
My man!
Good, you've made it.
Now everybody's accounted for.
Here's the plan.
We'll be taking off at 0100 hours.
What about the American?
A truck will drive by here
at exactly midnight.
You will jump on the back
and be driven to the border.
Wait. Nick is the only one who
knows the inside of that prison.
Well, Monsieur Rivers...
it seems
that you have become...
how do you say, indispensable?
Indispensable.
That's what I thought.
Sorry, fellas. I've done my time
in Flurgendorf Prison.
I got a truck to meet.
Nick, you can ask any price
you want, but you must help us.
Seems as long as I know
my way around that prison...
I'll never be lonely.
Nick, I know
how you feel about me...
but I'm asking you
to put your feelings aside...
for something more important.
Do I have to hear again...
what a great cause you
and Nigel are fighting for?
- But this was your cause too.
- My only cause is my music.
That's exactly what I mean.
Didn't you see the eyes of
those kids at your concert?
Oh, Nick, you must help us.
If not for me,
for the cause of freedom.
Latrine!
A traitor in our midst.
Well done, Latrine.
I see you have
dealt with him appropriately.
Not the bird, you fool!
This is a carrier pigeon on
its way to German headquarters.
Look. A message.
"Resistance planning
to free Flammond...
Sunday, 0800 hours."
That means the traitor
is someone at this table.
Excuse me,
but aren't you Nick Rivers...
the American rock-and-roll star?
No, I'm not.
But you must be.
Won't you sing us just one song?
I'm sorry. You must have me
confused with somebody else.
I'm Mel Torme.
That was close.
Perhaps a bit too close.
What do you mean?
We have absolutely no proof that
this man is who he claims to be.
And yet we're asking him
to lead us...
into the most heavily guarded
prison in Germany.
Why, Nigel, that's absurd.
Just a moment, my darling.
We know he came to us
with no credentials.
We know the Germans never knew
the location of our headquarters...
until he arrived.
And we know that we've been
infiltrated by a traitor.
Nigel, what are you saying?
How do we know
he's not Mel Torme?
Eva, look.
He's at the jukebox.
Well, get out on that floor
and hit that rug tonight
Well, get out on that floor
and hit that rug tonight
We're gonna shake that rug
till the early, early light
I said romp and stomp and slide
like a devil on a thread
Yeah
I said romp and stomp
And slide like a devil
on a thread
Well, stand back, baby
I believe I'm gonna fray my edge
You gotta straighten the rug
Yeah, straighten the rug
You gotta give it a push
Yeah, give it a shove
Well, rug cuttin', honey
Now, baby, won't you give it a tug
You better watch the mean old rug
don't bite you back
You better watch that mean old rug
don't bite you back
Yeah, I'm tellin'you, baby
it ain't no backdoor mat
You gotta straighten the rug
Yeah, straighten it out
You gotta give it a shove
Yeah, scream and shout
Well, rug cuttin', honey
you know what I'm talkin'about
Well, rug cuttin', honey
come on, let's straighten it out
And there's nobody
I'd rather straighten it with
Than you
This is not Mel Torme.
Oh, Nick.
Yes?
We don't know what's going
to happen down there.
This may be the last time
I'll see you...
and there's something
I wanted to say.
- You don't have to say anything.
- But I want to.
You must know that when
we were together last night...
I had no idea
that Nigel was still alive.
And now that you know?
Nick, his work
is so important to him.
I must stay with him.
He pleaded with me
not to leave.
I just hope you realize
that's all he means to me.
Oh, I don't know
what's right any longer.
I only wish
I didn't love you so much!
I've spotted the herd.
They're the key to the whole plan.
Now, we're here.
Every morning at 7:15,
the prison guards bring the cows...
from here, up this road
towards the prison...
for their morning milking.
Du Quois and I will merge
with the herd here...
and sneak in through the gate
and the electrified fence.
Then we'll break away
from the other cows...
and enter
the generator building here.
At exactly 7:25...
we cut the power.
Then the rest of you
come through here...
scale this wall, and Nick
can lead you to Flammond's cell.
Meanwhile, Hillary will steal this
truck by the railway crossing...
and pick us up back here.
Then we'll drive to the landing
field and the waiting plane.
Let's go.
No, you take the head.
I'm taking the back.
- But the plan was...
- Forget the plan.
I'm giving the orders here.
Shut up and give me the back half.
All right.
Be an asshole.
Here they come.
Okay, let's move out.
All right, let's go.
Double time.
We only have five minutes
to get to the circuit box...
and throw the switch.
We've got to hurry.
Can you see the gate?
- Yes. It's just ahead.
- Where are the guards?
I can only see one.
- Ow!
- Ja there, girl! Move along!
Stay behind the guards.
Once we get around this corner,
we'll break away from the herd.
Okay, now!
I think we did it.
- Can you see the generator?
- Yes, it's over there...
behind the feed bin.
All right, let's go.
We've got to hurry.
Nigel? You okay?
- Oh, yeah.
- Let's go.
What's the hurry?
Why are we always
in such a bloody rush?
I just wanted to stop
to take a rest.
The guards have passed.
All right. How long
till they cut the power?
Three more minutes...
and we can cut the wire.
There it is.
Lovely.
You're all right now.
I'm here.
Yeah, it's all right.
Ow!
Hey.
Here, here.
- Nigel, what are you doing?
- Never you mind.
Why do you want to go back
to the meter shed?
We're going
to turn the power back on.
But that will set off the alarm.
The others will be trapped.
I refuse.
Oh?
This gun in your back
says you won't.
Now, move!
So, it is you
who is a traitor.
Don't take it too badly,
old boy.
You're no more of a fool
than the others.
Now, get over there
and pull that...
Dr. Flammond!
- We're taking you out of here.
- But my daughter.
- Hillary's safe. She's with us.
- Thank God.
But how ironic. Another day and
I would have completed my tunnel.
Nice work.
- Very clever, my darling.
- Nigel!
You seem to have put the pieces
together very nicely...
but unfortunately
it's too late for you...
and the others.
But, Nigel, how could you?
It wasn't very difficult.
I could have returned to rescue you
from that wretched island...
but it would have meant leaving
my newfound comrades.
Comrades?
Yes. It was a Russian ship.
They taught me all about
you imperialist swine.
I was exposed to the works
of great thinkers...
Karl Marx, Lenin,
L. Ron Hubbard, Freddie Laker.
Now, get into the truck.
We're going for a ride.
- Where's the truck?
- Where's Hillary?
- I'm hungry.
- Du Quois!
What happened?
Nigel made me go back
to the meter shed...
ordered me
to set off the alarm.
And what does he want us
to do now?
Nothing, you numbskull.
Nigel's a traitor!
Latrine!
- What happened?
- Nigel took Hillary in truck.
That way.
I cannot leave the country
without my daughter.
I'm going after them.
I'll meet you at the landing field.
Whether you make it back or not,
that plane must take off...
with Dr. Flammond
at 1800 hours.
We recommend you be there at least
especially at this time of year.
Good luck, Nick.
Let's go.
Good luck.
You've got to hand it
to the Germans.
They make great cars.
Good-bye.
There's no more time.
We've got to take off now.
I will not leave
without my daughter.
Listen, old chap.
In a few minutes, it'll be dawn...
then we'll be sitting ducks
to their antiaircraft guns.
Wait.
There they are!
Oh, Father,
thank God you're safe!
My darling. How I feared
I would never see you again.
I am so proud of you,
my beloved.
There'll be time to talk
on the plane. You'd better hurry.
But I can't go on that plane.
- But, Hillary...
- No, Father. I'm needed here.
For as long as a single man
is forced to cower...
under the iron fist
of oppression...
as long as a child
cries out in the night...
or an actor
can be elected president...
we must continue the struggle.
No, Hillary.
It is much too dangerous
for you in Germany now.
Yes. Go with Nick.
Don't worry about us.
We will hear his music
on the Voice of America.
We will hear it in the hearts
of the people...
and in elevators everywhere.
And as long as we do,
we know that we are not alone...
in our fight.
They're right, Hillary.
- And when we get to America...
- Who knows what will be then.
- Everything's gonna be fine.
- Things change.
People change.
Hairstyles change.
Hillary,
I want you to be with me.
Interest rates fluctuate.
Who knows?
Don't you want to come with me?
If you don't, say so now.
Want?
Want.
More than anything!
Take me with you.
Good-bye, Chocolate Mousse.
I'll never forget you.
Good-bye, Du Quois.
Take care of yourself.
Good-bye, Dj Vu.
I'll always remember you.
And I'll miss you most of all,
Scarecrow.
I can't believe it's true
I met a girl like you
In heaven we would be
If you would spend
this night with me
If you would spend
this night with me
Darling, I'm here to say
I pray there'll come a day
When by my side you'll stay
And you, you will always be
A love that's true to me
You set my heart on fire
It's burning with desire
Your touch, your lips, your soul
Ooh, you make me lose control
Baby, please
Baby, please
Spend this night with me
Baby, please
Spend this night
With me
Ooh-wah
THE END