Uptown Saturday Night (1974) Movie Script
-Sarah?
-Yes?
Would you mind living in the country?
Course not. You're forgetting
I was born in the country. It's in my blood.
Someday maybe we can move back
down South someplace.
I think that would be real nice, baby.
Okay, I'm going to keep that in mind.
-You know, I was just thinking.
-What?
About when we first met.
You were living on Somerset Street
with your sister, Lela.
I was a young girl,
fresh from the country then.
You had the biggest butt I ever saw.
-Steve, if you don't stop....
-But it's the truth. Good-looking behind.
Said to myseIf when I first saw it:
"She got to be from down home...
"because they don't make behinds
like that in the city."
Steve!
It's the truth.
Don't you men ever think
about nothing besides behinds?
-Legs and boobs, but mostly behinds.
-Man!
I remember.
You sneaked through
the living-room window in the house...
with that crazy Charles...
-because he wanted to surprise Lela.
-Yeah, old Charles.
He was in a hurry to get home
from that war.
-He was your sister's first husband, right?
-No, honey, third.
You all looked so good in your uniforms,
especially you.
You know I didn't.
I was so tacky,
I didn't want you to see me.
I saw you. I couldn't miss that butt.
However, I knew the next time
you saw me, I'd have it together...
and you wouldn't be able to resist me.
Yeah, I knew it, too.
I took you out on our first date that night.
Yes, you did.
-Those were some beautiful days.
-Weren't they?
-Those walks we used to take in the park.
-You were the freshest man.
I was only doing
what a man's supposed to do.
-No, you were fresh, Steve Jackson.
-I wonder if that tree's still there.
You ain't no damn good, you know that?
I used to stop by that tree,
and we used to kiss.
-I don't want to hear it.
-I used to take you out by that tree...
and press you against it real hard
and you used to love it.
-Stop.
-No, it's the truth.
You'd hardly wait till I came and took you
to that tree and press you against it.
You used to say, "Steve, press me again! "
Steve, you know you lying.
You know you are.
-You couldn't get enough of that tree.
-Oh, man.
That was all an act.
-An act?
-Yes, siree.
-Sarah, you was hardly acting.
-Yes, I was, too.
You just didn't know what was going on.
I knew if I acted all shy and scared,
that would make you like me more.
-Woman, you can't fool me with no act.
-I see you married to me.
I got to admit you got me there, Sarah.
But if I had to do it all over again,
I wouldn't change a thing.
-You know something?
-What?
After 20 years of marriage,
two kids, and three jobs...
you still got the biggest butt I ever saw.
You're my queen, Sarah.
Thank you, my dear husband.
lt makes me very happy
to hear you say that.
Young blood.
-What's happening?
-Same old, same as old here.
Vacation starts today?
-You decided what you gonna do?
-I don't know.
Might walk the streets for two weeks...
bringing sunshine and brightness
to lonely dudes like you.
That's not funny.
-Come on. I'll buy you a drink.
-Okay.
How's your other job?
Rotten, boring, and underpaid,
but thank you, Jesus.
-Yes, Lord. Same here.
-Say, man, let's go to Zenobia's tonight.
-Where?
-Zenobia's.
You got to be crazy.
We ain't got that kind of money.
Will we ever? Come on, man.
I feel like cutting loose.
Bottle of beer costs $5 in that place.
You only live once.
What you say, homeboy?
Nothing doing. You ever been there?
Yeah...and no.
I dropped some people off with the cab...
but there be some fine mamas coming
in that place.
Count me out, young blood.
That's too fancy for me.
Some fine mamas coming in there.
No!
To your vacation.
Freddy, come here.
You ever been to Zenobia's?
Will you tell this man
about Zenobia's, please?
What's there to tell?
Once you go in,
you don't never want to come out.
It's the hippest place in the world.
You ought to check it out, Steve.
Let's go tonight. Shall we check it out?
I'll see how I feel
after Sarah goes to sleep.
-After Sarah goes to sleep?
-Yeah.
You mean you got to sneak out?
This guy....
You mean to tell me
you're so henpecked...
that you got to sneak out the house?
You better tighten up
on your married life, Jack.
You tell her you're going out, and that's it!
-You gonna leave Irma and go out, right?
-That's right.
I'm boss in my house.
I'm the king. B-O-S-S.
Sneaking out.
Man, I snap my fingers
and Irma jumps up...
and don't come down till I tell her to.
-That's right.
-All right.
-You name the time.
-All right.
-You meet me at 1 :00.
-1 :00.
After Irma goes to sleep.
You got to be a member
to get in here, don't you?
Yeah, don't worry about that.
Just look important.
Act like we're into something.
Your names, please?
Will you wait here a moment?
What's on that paper?
Our letter of introduction.
From who?
I wrote it myseIf on some stationery
from the law office where Irma works.
What it say?
Says, "To whom it may concern...
"the bearers of this letter are two very
important men in the diamond business.
"Any courtesies you can extend to them
would be greatly appreciated."
Signed Jerome Mordechai Wilkenson.
-Who's Jerome Mordechai Wilkenson?
-I have no idea...
but I sure hope
he don't show up here tonight.
Gentlemen.
Hello, Susie. How are you?
I heard about you, Daniel! Yes, I did.
-Gentlemen, how do you do?
-How do you do?
-I'm Madame Zenobia Bunight.
-I'm Steve Jackson.
-This is Wardell Franklin.
-Nice to meet you both.
You look like you must be new customers.
That's right. First time.
I certainly hope you enjoy yourselves
enough to want to come back soon.
You will find us candid and to the point.
Your pleasure is our business,
and you'll find plenty here to your liking.
-I already have.
-Why, thank you.
Why don't you fellas move around,
find something nice to do?
If you get bored here
and are looking for real excitement...
there is always the room
with the red door in the back.
-What's in there?
-Happiness...
-or sadness.
-What do you mean by that?
Why don't you go back there and find out?
And, Mr. Jackson,
you behave yourself, hear?
Mr. Jackson,
I think she was digging on you.
-She sure is a fine-looking mama.
-Yeah.
I thought I said that.
-What you think is going on back there?
-I don't know. Hookers maybe.
Okay, get your bets down.
Coming out.
Get your bets down.
Dice coming out. Leggy Peggy rolling.
Right. Dice here for $100.
-You got it. Anybody else want this?
-I'll take $200 of that, Peg.
Who else thinks the dice is wrong?
-Anybody else?
-Got you.
I'm going to get in this game.
-You're going to get your feelings hurt.
-Loan me some money.
-No.
-Come on, man.
You got to be crazy!
-Give me some money.
-No.
You brothers going to participate
or talk stuff?
-We gonna play, man.
-lt costs $150 to get in this game.
If you haven't got it, agitate the gravel...
and take this lame with you.
-We got the money, chump.
-Get down with it.
Bet up. New point coming out.
-That's right. $50 on the dynamite lady!
-That's right, my brother!
You and me.
I thought you said, "Let's stand."
-Let's go, darling.
-Here we go.
Seven, a winner!
-I'm letting it all ride!
-Let it ride. That's right.
$100 on Miss Peggy Leggy.
-That's right.
-Let's go again.
Here we go. One time more.
-Eleven!
-Still rolling.
-Don't touch a thing!
-Don't touch it?
It's all right. How about just a little bit?
It's all riding again.
Now, all you big-time players
jump on that...
if you think you can stand the strain.
That's right, my sister.
And while you at it, jump on that,
and $5 more for the church.
Jump on it! Come on.
Jump on it some more there.
Your hand moves every time mine moves.
-Roll the dice.
-Again!
-Seven, a winner!
-There you go!
How long you all been open down here?
l've been working for a living.
-Yeah. I know, honey.
-Jump on it. You're my man.
-I got your name and number.
-Right on, brother.
Go ahead, brother.
-Peggy, roll it.
-Here we go!
-Eleven, a winner!
-All right!
What I tell you? I believe in miracles!
Yes, indeed, and Jesus wept.
My goodness, are you still here, brother?
-You must don't have no place to go.
-Here we go!
-Seven!
-Hello, seven!
-Nine.
-Place your bets.
-Nine is the point, darling.
-Here! Now!
-Nine, a winner!
-All right! Respect a sister.
-Send all them to the pawn shop.
-Change the dice.
Yeah, change the dice.
Hell, no! If you all can't stand the heat,
get out the kitchen!
-Harry S. Truman, December 17, 1952.
-That's right.
I was in the kitchen when he said it.
-Eleven!
-Hello!
-The dice have no sense whatsoever.
-Sometimes I don't understand it myself.
Here we go. Tap this. Tap it!
Seven again. Here we go.
You all come on. Please cover this area
because this money is waiting for friends.
Be nice and live.
All right, freeze!
Anybody makes a wrong move
gets put full of holes.
-We mean business!
-Do as you're told and you won't get hurt!
-I can't believe this!
-Shut up!
Everybody, hands up! Slowly!
As high as you can get them !
That's better.
Move away from the table!
Line up over there!
Hurry up!
Move it!
Keep your hands up.
This ain't no time to get brave, turkey.
Put it in the bag.
Give me those rings.
Keep them up.
Just in case
somebody's wearing a heater...
everybody strip down to their underwear,
ladies included.
Move it!
You, too, lady.
I don't wear underwear.
Don't play games.
Just get it off!
Lord, have mercy.
Stay where you are for 10 minutes.
Anybody tries to move before that
gets shot.
I want to thank you, brothers and sisters,
for a very lovely evening.
Never have so few owed
so much to so many.
Good night!
Amen! Truly wonderful!
Be seated, would you please?
We want to thank our choir
for that beautiful and inspiring rendition...
of a spiritual very close to our hearts.
Now I should like, at this time,
to remind those of you...
attending our church picnic next Sunday...
that buses will depart from the front
of the church after the service.
Now, we want to take a moment also...
to ask the weak among you...
to refrain from bringing brown paper bags
to the picnic.
We're gonna have enough
brown paper bags with the lunch in them.
You know what I mean?
I mean, after all,
we are having a church social...
and not a fraternity boat ride!
Now, I repeat, there will be no...
there will be no joy juice allowed!
Let me hear what I said.
No joy juice allowed!
Would you repeat that for me
one more time?
No joy juice allowed!
We will, right after the service,
search all of the choir robes.
I want everybody to understand...
the buses will not leave
before the service is over...
and he who hesitates will be left.
I was hoping to paint the kids' room
before they got home...
so they'd have someplace fresh
to come home to.
Maybe we could shop for some
new carpets, curtains, and candles.
What you think, Steve?
Honey?
Steve, I know you hear me.
Having a good time, honey?
Are you dreaming of me, baby?
Dreaming of a woman?
What you hit me for?
You must have been dreaming.
Who were you dreaming about?
You did hit me.
Sarah!
-Steve, you all right?
-Sarah!
What is it, baby?
-Oh, my God, he's having an attack!
-No, Sarah.
Did we.... Have you....
The lottery ticket I found in your suit
when I took it to the cleaners?
Is that a nine? Is that a one?
And is that a four?
And is that another one and another nine?
Nine-one-four-one-nine?
That's my.... I won. That's my ticket.
How much for? My goodness!
$50,000.
Money, honey
Money, honey
What's wrong?
The lottery ticket!
Is in your wallet?
That was stolen at Zenobia's?
Does Sarah know?
She mad, ain't she?
-What you gonna do?
-I'm going to find that wallet, Wardell.
-How?
-By any means necessary.
I want you to help me, young blood.
I'm your man, homeboy.
What's your first step?
I ain't sure,
but we got to find those robbers.
We can't go to the police.
We can't trust them if they know
what's in the wallet...
and if we don't tell them about it,
they won't waste time looking for it.
So I figure we going to have to get out
in the street...
and keep our ears and eyes open
until we pick up some clues.
We can't get out there ourselves.
For that kind of money? The hell we can't!
Hands up! Turn around and face the wall.
-Man, l--
-Freeze.
No, see, you all got the wrong....
You're wrong. I haven't done anything.
I want a lawyer.
-l--
-Don't say nothing to me!
Do you know
they was going to shoot me? Wardell!
Mistook me for some big, ugly guy
with a beard and a mustache.
-I can understand how--
-Shut up!
We're not doing this stuff anymore.
We're going to get someone who knows
what he's doing. A private detective.
-Where will we find a private detective?
-ln the yellow pages! I don't know!
Mr. Washington?
What do you want?
-We're looking for Sharp Eye Washington.
-Who looking for him?
Steve Jackson,
and this is my friend, Wardell Franklin.
-We want him for a job.
-What kind of job?
Some property of ours was stolen.
We want him to get it back for us.
Cost you $500.
-$500? We ain't got that kind of money.
-$400?
No.
I think we gonna have to go
someplace else.
How about $300?
You sure you're Sharp Eye Washington,
the private detective?
I'm Sharp Eye Washington, the one
and only. Never be another like me.
We're working people.
See, I drive a taxi cab, and I mean, $300....
Oh, man.
You don't know what it is
to be a detective. It's rough.
People are looking for me now.
-Who?
-None of your business who.
Just make up your mind
because I got to split.
How about $200?
All you risk is $200, but I put my life
on the line in service to you.
That's right. It's a lonely, dangerous life
being a private detective.
All you do is risk a little money.
I solve the cases, and people are after me!
Look at my eye, my right eye.
See how bloodshot it is?
Know how it got that way?
From sleeping with one eye open, baby.
Life ain't easy. Always on the move...
people after me with guns. Looking
under the hood of your car for bombs...
peeking out windows,
peering down hallways.
ln the movies, right?
The movies always got some super nigger
killing some white boy in the Mafia...
beating up the crooked police.
That's not true and it don't help me either.
And women. They all got women.
Black detective in the movies
always got a woman.
Watch yourself.
I ain't had a woman in how long? Months!
I might as well be a monk,
and that's what it's like being a detective.
That's the real truth of it.
It's always steady on the case.
I'm getting my thing together, too, baby,
because I'm Sharp Eye Washington.
Steady on the case.
We give you $50 down
and the rest when you find our property.
You got a deal. Just write your name,
address and phone number.
Like I said, you got nothing to worry about
because I'm going to find your property.
The address and the phone number.
$50.
But we ain't told you what we lost.
I was about to bring that up.
It's something very valuable.
Yeah.
-And it's more precious than gold?
-That's right.
-It's a....
-Wallet.
I thought so. What's in it?
Some family pictures...
and some...sentimental souvenirs.
I thought it was something like that.
Well, steady on the case.
Say, man. Hey!
It's just my way of staying one step ahead
of the thieves and hustlers.
Wait.
I know. A wallet.
Listen. Look, wait a minute!
What's that?
I'd like to get 300 tickets
to the policeman's ball.
Your con days are over, Washington.
-He stole our money.
-He stole a lot of people's money, fella.
-We've been on your trail a long time.
-I was framed.
You said that in Des Moines, lowa...
where you were Cleophus Washington,
a preacher.
You escaped from custody.
You said it in Jersey City where...
you were Henry Hawthorne Washington,
a bogus lawyer. You jumped bail.
Your clients are still waiting
for you to handle their cases.
That's my cousin Clarence Washington.
That's not me.
Damn, man, we trusted you.
I mean, why us?
-Why not you, brother?
-Take him away.
Wait a minute. He stole our money.
What do we do about that?
I advise you to go to file a complaint
for the return of the money...
but let me warn you,
you'll be waiting in a long line.
Is the Governor in town?
Get him down here. I want to see him.
-Yes, may I help you?
-We'd like to see Congressman Lincoln.
Excuse me, Congressman Lincoln, there
are two gentlemen waiting to see you.
-Yes, of course, from the Mayor's office.
-No, sir.
Then perhaps the press.
I think not, sir.
They look, well, rather ordinary.
-Constituents?
-Yes, sir.
-Show them in.
-Yes, sir.
-Quick, their names.
-Mr. Franklin. Mr. Jackson.
-Right.
-Show them in.
Yes, sir.
Gentlemen.
Brothers, brothers.
I am so glad to see you.
Mr. Jackson, how do you do?
And Mr. Franklin, I'm delighted to see you.
-I'm Jackson, he's Franklin.
-I'm sorry about that.
Brothers.
Have a seat.
-Now, then, Mr. Wilson--
-Jackson.
Oh, yes, of course.
You see, I am so glad to see you.
lt isn't often I'm privileged to see
our more common folk...
the real salt-of-the-earth folk, you know.
As I was just saying to my beloved wife...
it is because of knowing the ordinary folk
in our daily lives...
that we can keep in touch
with the pulse of the grassroots.
Now, brothers, what can I do for you?
We have this problem--
Problem? Your problems
are my problems...
and our problems are the problems
of all black people.
-We were robbed, Congressman Lincoln.
-No.
-Yes, at gunpoint.
-Gunpoint?
What a shame.
lt wasn't brothers, was it?
They were wearing masks,
but we are sure they were black.
My people.
How long?
Why do we do this to one another?
-Now you were saying you were robbed.
-The other night.
Our wallets, our jewelry...
and some very valuable mementos
that we kept....
Never fear.
Just one simple phone call...
to my good friend Lieutenant Hardcastle
down at police headquarters...
ought to go a long way
in capturing this traitor to our race.
Where did you say
this robbery took place?
Madame Zenobia.
-ls the line busy?
-Madame Zenobia?
You know the place?
Yes.
That is...
l've heard...
of that illegal...
after-hours club.
A den of iniquity.
Yes, a lot of hip people go by there,
people from all different sides of the track.
lrresponsible ingrates, brothers.
You would be well advised not to venture
down that dark path.
Just last week,
I was saying to my beloved wife...
that I would not be caught dead
in such a place.
Hi, how you doing today, sugar?
Oh, I'm sorry.
I didn't realize you were in a conference.
Brother man, what's happening?
-Peggy Leggy.
-No.
Around here, folks call me Mrs. Lincoln.
You know, in spite of
that whole rip-off thing...
child, I had me a ball, I want to tell you!
Peg, dear, must you always speak dialect?
It's so condescending.
We must rid ourselves
of these linguistic shackles.
Honey, hush.
You all have got to forgive my husband.
I love his sweet seIf to death...
but ever since he got a bit of position,
he thinks he's into something.
There was a time
when he still liked fried chicken.
I get so tired
of going to them corny dances...
corny dinners we keep getting invited to...
where you be the token one
and everybody standing around...
looking at you
like you something in the zoo.
I got tired!
About six months ago,
I got old Super Black over here...
to take me to where my folks is.
I figure he'd take me to a dinner,
take me dancing or something...
and, child, he come taking me
to Zenobia's.
He knew all the bouncers,
all the waitresses by their first names...
and come to find out,
he a charter member!
Damn near blew my mind.
This nigger's something else, honey.
You see, I discovered
that a great number of my constituents....
Honey, that ain't nothing
for you to be ashamed of.
Them politicians
you be hanging out with in Washington...
be getting into their pleasures
a whole lot worse of ways than that.
Right, brothers?
How can one work
for the good of one's people...
if one's wife continually airs in public
one's dirty laundry?
The phrase is
"putting one's business in the street."
You see what I mean?
So, what brings
you all around here visiting?
We're trying to get some help...
to track down them stick-up fellas...
'cause we lost some very valuable
property the other night.
I'm sorry to hear that.
And them niggers
interrupted the best roll...
I ever had!
Listen, there's a big-time hood named
Geechie Dan Beauford you should see.
Also, get a rundown on a local hustler
named Little Seymour.
Personally, I think Seymour
is the one who done it, but be careful.
Little Seymour travels with a bodyguard
named Big Percy, who can get real ugly.
-You sure this is the place?
-Yes, I'm sure.
All we got to do is go inside,
see this Little Seymour...
and ask him about our property.
Now, come on.
-You see what I saw?
-Yes, I saw what you saw...
and don't worry about nothing...
because the dude mess with me,
I'll knock him out.
You know why?
Because I'm from off the corners.
Now, come on.
You just let some cat look funny at me
and see if I ain't on his case.
That's right!
Because my money
is in this place someplace, too.
That's right, and where my money
is concerned, I don't play.
I get mean when you mess with my green.
Now, you see if I'm kidding.
Say, man.
Say, brother.
-Say, I'm talking to you, man.
-What you want?
You seen Big Percy around here?
-Who wants to know?
-I'm asking the questions, sissy.
Sissy!
-I asked you a question, chump!
-He ain't here.
Why didn't you say that in the first place?
You dig it? You knock a dude down,
you get some respect.
Come on.
Yeah. Now, you understand
what I'm talking about?
That's the only way to do it.
The American way.
You understand that?
Now, the dude said that Big Percy...
Little Seymour's bodyguard, ain't here.
So let's go get Little Seymour!
-You understand? Go ahead.
-Let's get him.
Now listen here, you all...
I'm looking for...
a corny little runt
named Seymour Petigreau.
I know you're in here, Seymour,
so come on out!
I hear you're so ugly...
till the sun refuse to shine
every time you come out.
You're so ugly...
till it's against the law in 20 states
to marry you.
Yeah, that's it, Steve. You're cooking.
You keep on talking.
He's in here somewhere...
and just remember, I got your back.
And dig, say something about his mama.
-Gotcha.
-That'll get him.
I hear your breath's so bad...
till you put the three leading toothpastes
out of business.
Seymour Petigreau....
Come out!
I'm Little Seymour.
And I'm Big Percy.
What do you turkeys want?
Mr. Seymour, I just got out the hospital.
I was in the war. Veteran.
See, I mean, every once in a while...
I have these fits, you know.
And the fits are....
I mean, I be jumping bad...
and trying to make an impression
on people.
But it's them fits that's doing it.
But then, every once in a while...
they just go down
and then I be myseIf again...
and I don't be jumping bad.
But it's not my fault, Mr. Seymour.
But I'm not reaching for a gun. I got a card.
See, the card says, "If in case of a fit...
"please put this man unharmed in a cab
and send him home to his wife.
"She pay the bill."
So I didn't want you
to get the wrong impression.
You loud-talked me.
Nobody loud-talks Little Seymour.
See, Mr. Seymour, that's.... See, I didn't....
He's the one who loud-talked you.
But, first of all, you got to understand
about his grandmother.
His grandmother brought up him...
and his sisters.
Ever since they was down there
picking cotton, Mr. Seymour.
I know you can identify
with picking cotton.
If you can't, then I can dig that.
But anyway, see, what happens
is the grandmother's an old lady, you dig?
And so his sister's been keeping
life savings on her...
because she don't trust the bank too deep.
Banks are ripping people off and stuff.
And then she went to Zenobia's, you dig?
And in Zenobia's...
was robbed of the money.
And the life savings just went.
So my man said,
"Let's go check out Mr. Seymour."
Because you're highly thought of
in our community, you dig?
I mean, you're even bigger
than Geechie Dan Beauford, you dig?
Anyway he's desperate to talk to you.
That's why he's calling you
all them names.
But if you notice, Mr. Seymour,
he never said nothing about your mother.
So he wasn't that desperate, you see?
Steve, come over here
and apologize to Mr. Seymour.
This is my friend, Steve,
who's going to apologize to you.
Let's get a few things straight.
First, whoever hit Zenobia
is going to pay for it...
with the skin off their tail
when I find out who it is...
because me and her is tight.
And second, that story
you just told me is bullshit.
Yes, sir.
And third...
here's a little something
for niggers who loud-talk Little Seymour.
-Hi, girl.
-Hi, Irma.
-Where are they?
-ln there, child.
-What are we gonna do with these fools?
-I don't know.
No, wait a minute. See, because
first of all, that was the hardest-hitting...
fastest, baddest little black man
of colored descent...
I have ever seen in my life.
-But I had him on the run, didn't l?
-Didn't you?
-Did he hit me with his foot or his hand?
-Both of them, at the same time.
Wardell, honey.
Your imagination's going to get you killed
one of these days.
Now, get up and let me take you home
and try to patch you up.
I'll talk to you tomorrow.
Don't forget, tomorrow we going after
big-time Geechie Dan Beauford.
You got it.
I'm here to see Mr. Geechie Dan.
Wait here.
A man's here to see you, boss.
Bring him over here and sit him down.
Sit down.
Now, what do you want?
Sir, see, it's like this.
Some property of mine was stolen...
and I need some help.
So what you coming to me for?
I heard that don't nothing go down
unless you know about it.
Man, get out of my face.
No. Just a minute, Geechie Dan.
Mr. Beauford.
If you don't get away from here soon...
they are going to be picking up your head
from across the street.
Now move out, sucker.
Wait one minute. Don't be pulling....
Mr. Beauford, please, sir. Please.
Move it!
All right, let's start all over again.
-You all going to tell me something.
-What?
-Anything I want to know.
-We don't know nothing.
Somebody hired you to finger me...
-and I want to know who.
-Nobody hired us to do nothing.
I just came to you
because I was looking for help.
-You're a lying dog, sucker.
-No. I ain't. We told you...
-we don't know nothing about them guns--
-Nigger!
And you, too, hot lips.
I'll talk!
If we talk, are you going to let us go?
How we know you ain't lying?
First off, I don't want you.
I want your boss. And second...
I like you.
And third...
if you all don't tell me everything
I want to know...
we gonna beat
all the black off both of you.
-What you want to know?
-Silky Slim sent you, didn't he?
He wants to control all my territory,
don't he?
That's what I figured.
You all take these two dogs somewhere,
put them to sleep.
-You said you was going to let us go.
-You just confessed, turkey.
-Your ass is grass.
-No.
I can prove who we are.
There's my stub from my paycheck.
My name's on it.
My name.
My bowling club lD, see?
So you are only finger men? So what?
You know too much. Get them out of here.
-Why don't we hit Slim?
-I thought about it...
-but he's hard as hell to get.
-Anyone can be gotten to.
It's funny, man.
One day, I'm on top of the world.
And now this thing with Silky Slim.
He must be crazy!
Think I'll let him move in on my territory
and do nothing about it?
-Right.
-Who does he think he is?
-He's messing with Geechie Dan Beauford!
-Right.
I will kill the punk!
Trying to off me. I will murder the sucker!
Okay, Geechie...
that was your short!
Next time it's going to be your life!
-You got a life, too, Silky Slim !
-I'm giving you two minutes.
We make a deal now...
or you're going to be wearing wings.
-Take your best shot! No deal!
-Come on, man.
-Let's be reasonable.
-Ain't nothing to be reasonable about.
Look, Geechie...
I said let's talk, my man.
You team up with me
and we rule this town from river to river.
Never will so few
owe so much to so many.
-That's the one! He's the one we're after.
-Shut up over there!
But he's the one
who robbed Madame Zenobia's.
So what?
But he stole something that night.
Something he don't know about...
something that's worth a lot of money.
I told you, shut up over there.
Don't bug me with this penny ante crap
at a time like this.
-You've got one minute, Geechie.
-But this ain't no penny ante.
It's worth a fortune.
We'll share it with you, Mr. Geechie Dan.
-You know how much it's worth?
-$300,000.
-What'd you say?
-$300,000 in diamonds.
Slim?
$300,000?
ln diamonds?
Yeah, but he don't know nothing
about it, see?
How you know
they knocked off Zenobia's?
Go on, talk fast, turkey,
or I'll put a hole through your eyes.
'Cause that's what he said
when he robbed the place.
He said, "Never have so few
owed so much to so many."
You see?
And he had a mask on at the time...
but we recognize his voice.
-Yeah. He's the one.
-What about the diamonds?
-Your time's up, Geechie.
-Give me a couple of minutes, Slim.
I'm talking it over with my boys.
One minute, my man.
Go on. Talk.
Me and my man,
we was going to Madame Zenobia's.
And we was behind
these two African gentlemen...
who was going in there.
First, see, the doorman,
he wouldn't let them in.
Then they showed him a letter
from their lawyer...
that said they were very important people
in the diamond business.
So the doorman apologized to them
and he let them in.
Later on that evening, I was in the john.
I was relieving myself.
And the two Africans
came into the bathroom.
Now, they didn't know I was in there
because I was sitting on the john.
And one of them, I heard him say:
"What did you do with the diamonds?"
So the other one said,
"They're in my lawyer's office.
"They'll be safe there
for the next 10 days...
"till we get back from Washington.
"And then the buyer will come in
from California."
The other African said:
"How much you think
we going to get for these stones?"
So the other one said:
"$300,000."
So they left...
and I came running out
to talk to my man...
about getting to the lawyer's office
to hit the place and get them diamonds.
That's when Silky Slim come in
and held everybody up...
and took the wallets and the money,
and along with it, the lawyer's letter...
with the address
of where the diamonds is.
So that's why you've been sniffing around.
-To help you find the letter.
-Yes, sir.
Of course, if you're lying...
the undertaker's going to visit
your relatives.
Okay, Geechie, let me hear it.
All right!
We can make some kind of deal.
-Come on in.
-Good.
Everybody keep their hands
where we can see them.
Make sure you come through that door
the same way.
No, put them away.
My man.
What's happening?
Down to business, Slim.
I don't like your bag.
You got no class.
Drug dealing, prostitution...
vulgar stickups like Madame Zenobia's
last Saturday night.
-That ain't my thing.
-I was home in bed last Saturday night.
No skin off me, man, so let's move on.
Now I got something
we can work on together.
It's a $300,000 proposition.
-I'm interested.
-Fifty-fifty.
And if we wrap it up,
then we can talk maybe...
about some togetherness
on a permanent basis.
What's the deal?
You left Zenobia's the other night
loaded down with personal effects...
among which is a document
that will lead us to the $300,000.
It's a simple document.
lt ain't got no meaning
until I tell you what it connects up with...
and I ain't going to tell you...
until you bring back every bit
of the personal property you lifted.
You won't figure it out
in a million years, Slim.
-How do I know you ain't running a game?
-My word is my rep.
But, of course, if you didn't hit
Madame Zenobia's last Saturday night...
then the whole thing is academic.
You got a deal.
Good.
We'll meet in a neutral place.
I'll let you know where,
when I call you and tell you what time.
I'll be there with three of my boys,
and you show up with three of yours.
-Look to see you around.
-You will.
Order me a new car.
That is if you want to be comfortable
riding around in your own.
Amen! Truly wonderful.
We got to thank our choir.
Sister Louise, you are certainly
in rare form tonight.
Mr. Geechie Dan?
My wallet is in that bag
Mr. Silky Slim's got on his lap there.
And please, sir, may I have it?
This thing go all right, boy,
you can buy yourseIf a dozen wallets...
and fill them all with $100 bills.
That one has family mementos.
If it's all the same to you--
Now, before we leave
on our annual picnic...
I'd like to bring to your attention....
We're going on this picnic.
That way if anything happens,
we got the perfect alibi.
And the saying that comes back
into my mind from that war...
was, "Loose lips sink ships."
Said that, Second World War...
'cause they wanted people
to keep their mouths shut...
and listen a little more.
Loose lips sink ships!
And the looser the lips are,
the faster the ship sinks.
And some of the lips
in this congregation...
done sunk aircraft carriers.
Friends, I say to you tonight...
if we were as fast on the hip
as we are on the lip...
we'd have a bigger church here.
Better know it.
Let me tell you about some of the people
in this congregation.
You know what they're doing?
A lot of the people in this church
have been going around...
spreading falsehoods, lies, and rumors,
trying to ruin the reputation...
of a lot of other people in this church.
They go around trying to rock
somebody else's cradle...
trying to get a piece
of somebody else's pie.
Trying to covet somebody else's mate
for their own.
Amen.
Loose lips...
friends put in motion
by lechery and sinful thought...
is sinking some of the great ships
of marriage.
They are going down on the rocks.
That's what they are doing. Sinking!
Amen.
'Cause lips won't shut up...
and help the buoyancy
keep them floating...
across the top of the river of happiness.
You all know I'm talking
about the loose lips...
that go around kissing on lips
that don't belong to them.
That go around lying on folks...
that make young girls make promises
they know their bodies can't stand.
That's the kind of lips I'm talking about.
We got to learn to control them lips,
tighten up them ears a little tighter!
We got to learn to call on the Lord
and ask him to teach us some discipline!
Remember, children,
loose lips are everywhere.
There's no one place you can go
and all the lips are there.
Loose lips move around.
Loose lips are among you in the pews.
They're among you in the choir.
-Amen.
-Yes, sir.
There are loose lips among the deacons.
Certain things got out about a meeting
we had here last Tuesday night...
that nobody should have known!
Had to be among the deacons.
It's among the children
in the Sunday school...
saying, "l ain't going to put in this money.
"I'm going to spend it on candy."
I done heard so many bad things
about so many of you all...
till I wept with sadness last night.
Last night my heart hung heavy, friends.
I felt so bad,
I almost went out and bought a bottle.
Watch out there, now. Watch out there.
Friends, I fought temptation...
and that's what we gonna
have to learn to do.
When we get the temptation
to let our loose lips loose, fight it!
We got to learn to get off the wrong foot...
and step out on the good foot. Feel good.
When you feel good, you look good,
and you want to do good things.
You want to make other people happy
'cause it makes you happy yourself.
Friends, we need more romance
and less hot pants.
Come on with it now.
Run some water on the hot pants.
Put your sprinkler on and run through,
you want to cool your hot pants off.
We need more midnight sleeping
and less midnight creeping.
Yeah. Lay it on us.
Help us, Lord! Help us!
Somebody got to do something!
-Can I get an amen?
-Amen!
Let's stand here, brother...
as we get ready to dismiss ourselves
for our picnic.
-Can I get one more amen for the Lord?
-Amen!
Truly wonderful, brother!
I want you to call your boss...
and tell him his office
is gonna be burglarized this afternoon...
and have the police stake it out, all right?
-But--
-Just do what I asked you to do.
Something's come up, baby.
I got to be out of the city for a few hours.
Keep everything warm. I'll see you later.
-What it is.
-Move it.
No good.
Maybe we could get into the trunk
through the back seat.
All right, you young ones,
baseball game is about to start!
Everybody on the field. Come on now!
Baseball game is about to start.
All you players on the field.
Man, I ain't had this much fun
since I was in reform school.
-Yeah? Which one was you in?
-Waterbury.
No, I was in Charlottetown. Watch this.
I'm going to steal second on you turkeys.
Try it.
See if you can get me a chisel
and a hammer.
-A what?
-A chisel and a hammer.
-Where am I going to get a chisel?
-Look in the toolbox of the bus, dodo.
Come and get it!
You know,
I had such a time dancing with you.
You're a dainty little thing.
I'd like to take you
to Geechie Dan's place...
and have a time. Yes, I would.
Don't you think it's time you told me...
about what's going on
with your new friends?
We're just working with them
to get the ticket.
-Steve.
-Now, don't worry.
We're closer to that ticket
than you realize. Don't worry.
Okay, if you say so.
I better go get the girls ready
for the African ceremonial pageant.
Give me a kiss. Come on, give me a kiss.
Hello.
Baby, what's happening?
Sure, I can talk.
All right, girl. Split.
No. You stay right where you are.
No. I'll get back to you later. Hang up now.
I'll be a son of a....
-Everything's gone wrong.
-They didn't get the diamonds.
Not only didn't get them,
but they got busted...
all of them, and one of them talked!
No. Not my boys. They don't talk.
Mine neither, but somebody did...
'cause the cops is looking for me and you.
They busted into my apartment
with a warrant for both of us!
Then somebody did talk.
I think you and me better get out of here
so we can kind of talk this thing over.
Let's roll.
-Mr. Silky Slim--
-Out of my way, fool!
We could have been set up.
What about these two?
Maybe we were set up.
Rock gonna check you out good...
and if you ain't clean, I'll come on
back here and pick up your liver.
-Now move out of there, sucker.
-Get that heap out of there.
Boss, look! Trouble!
-Let's get the hell out of here.
-There's only one road out, and that's it!
-We've got to think of something fast.
-You better think of something fast.
-This whole dumb-ass trip was your idea !
-Hang on to your cool, sucker.
There's got to be something.
There's got to be a way out.
Officer Lewis, what's going on?
We have a warrant for the arrest of one
Nickademus Williams, alias Silky Slim...
and one Daniel Beauford,
alias Geechie Dan.
We don't have anybody
in our congregation with names like them.
Geechie Slim. Silky Dan. No.
-You mind if we look around?
-No, sir, Officer. You go right ahead.
-This Slim's car?
-Yeah.
Open it.
Just stay with me.
Nothing here, sir.
They're here someplace.
All you got to do is point them out.
We'll do the rest.
I'm gonna kill you.
-Well?
-I can't, man. They'll murder me.
I can't. They'll do me in.
You understand? I can't do it!
Now, move! Get out of the way!
Mr. Silky, wait! Mr. Silky.
There they go!
Hit the brakes.
That sucker's going to get us killed.
You better get him off of there.
Door's stuck.
Fool, you can't swim !
-You all right, baby?
-I'm fine.
I'm doing all right. How's Wardell?
He's in another wing.
Irma's with him. He's okay.
-And the ticket?
-It's safely hidden away at home.
Sarah, we're on our way.
Now, Sarah,
don't you cloud up on me, girl.
Lookie here.
You got to go shopping for us.
A backyard, a southern one.
I know this restaurant across town,
seafood restaurant...
where they got some of the best food
in the world...
and live music and dancing.
Now that we can afford it, we gonna
have to go out and do this town up right.
I got my red dress...
and my high-heeled sneakers
at home waiting, baby.
Amen!
English
-Yes?
Would you mind living in the country?
Course not. You're forgetting
I was born in the country. It's in my blood.
Someday maybe we can move back
down South someplace.
I think that would be real nice, baby.
Okay, I'm going to keep that in mind.
-You know, I was just thinking.
-What?
About when we first met.
You were living on Somerset Street
with your sister, Lela.
I was a young girl,
fresh from the country then.
You had the biggest butt I ever saw.
-Steve, if you don't stop....
-But it's the truth. Good-looking behind.
Said to myseIf when I first saw it:
"She got to be from down home...
"because they don't make behinds
like that in the city."
Steve!
It's the truth.
Don't you men ever think
about nothing besides behinds?
-Legs and boobs, but mostly behinds.
-Man!
I remember.
You sneaked through
the living-room window in the house...
with that crazy Charles...
-because he wanted to surprise Lela.
-Yeah, old Charles.
He was in a hurry to get home
from that war.
-He was your sister's first husband, right?
-No, honey, third.
You all looked so good in your uniforms,
especially you.
You know I didn't.
I was so tacky,
I didn't want you to see me.
I saw you. I couldn't miss that butt.
However, I knew the next time
you saw me, I'd have it together...
and you wouldn't be able to resist me.
Yeah, I knew it, too.
I took you out on our first date that night.
Yes, you did.
-Those were some beautiful days.
-Weren't they?
-Those walks we used to take in the park.
-You were the freshest man.
I was only doing
what a man's supposed to do.
-No, you were fresh, Steve Jackson.
-I wonder if that tree's still there.
You ain't no damn good, you know that?
I used to stop by that tree,
and we used to kiss.
-I don't want to hear it.
-I used to take you out by that tree...
and press you against it real hard
and you used to love it.
-Stop.
-No, it's the truth.
You'd hardly wait till I came and took you
to that tree and press you against it.
You used to say, "Steve, press me again! "
Steve, you know you lying.
You know you are.
-You couldn't get enough of that tree.
-Oh, man.
That was all an act.
-An act?
-Yes, siree.
-Sarah, you was hardly acting.
-Yes, I was, too.
You just didn't know what was going on.
I knew if I acted all shy and scared,
that would make you like me more.
-Woman, you can't fool me with no act.
-I see you married to me.
I got to admit you got me there, Sarah.
But if I had to do it all over again,
I wouldn't change a thing.
-You know something?
-What?
After 20 years of marriage,
two kids, and three jobs...
you still got the biggest butt I ever saw.
You're my queen, Sarah.
Thank you, my dear husband.
lt makes me very happy
to hear you say that.
Young blood.
-What's happening?
-Same old, same as old here.
Vacation starts today?
-You decided what you gonna do?
-I don't know.
Might walk the streets for two weeks...
bringing sunshine and brightness
to lonely dudes like you.
That's not funny.
-Come on. I'll buy you a drink.
-Okay.
How's your other job?
Rotten, boring, and underpaid,
but thank you, Jesus.
-Yes, Lord. Same here.
-Say, man, let's go to Zenobia's tonight.
-Where?
-Zenobia's.
You got to be crazy.
We ain't got that kind of money.
Will we ever? Come on, man.
I feel like cutting loose.
Bottle of beer costs $5 in that place.
You only live once.
What you say, homeboy?
Nothing doing. You ever been there?
Yeah...and no.
I dropped some people off with the cab...
but there be some fine mamas coming
in that place.
Count me out, young blood.
That's too fancy for me.
Some fine mamas coming in there.
No!
To your vacation.
Freddy, come here.
You ever been to Zenobia's?
Will you tell this man
about Zenobia's, please?
What's there to tell?
Once you go in,
you don't never want to come out.
It's the hippest place in the world.
You ought to check it out, Steve.
Let's go tonight. Shall we check it out?
I'll see how I feel
after Sarah goes to sleep.
-After Sarah goes to sleep?
-Yeah.
You mean you got to sneak out?
This guy....
You mean to tell me
you're so henpecked...
that you got to sneak out the house?
You better tighten up
on your married life, Jack.
You tell her you're going out, and that's it!
-You gonna leave Irma and go out, right?
-That's right.
I'm boss in my house.
I'm the king. B-O-S-S.
Sneaking out.
Man, I snap my fingers
and Irma jumps up...
and don't come down till I tell her to.
-That's right.
-All right.
-You name the time.
-All right.
-You meet me at 1 :00.
-1 :00.
After Irma goes to sleep.
You got to be a member
to get in here, don't you?
Yeah, don't worry about that.
Just look important.
Act like we're into something.
Your names, please?
Will you wait here a moment?
What's on that paper?
Our letter of introduction.
From who?
I wrote it myseIf on some stationery
from the law office where Irma works.
What it say?
Says, "To whom it may concern...
"the bearers of this letter are two very
important men in the diamond business.
"Any courtesies you can extend to them
would be greatly appreciated."
Signed Jerome Mordechai Wilkenson.
-Who's Jerome Mordechai Wilkenson?
-I have no idea...
but I sure hope
he don't show up here tonight.
Gentlemen.
Hello, Susie. How are you?
I heard about you, Daniel! Yes, I did.
-Gentlemen, how do you do?
-How do you do?
-I'm Madame Zenobia Bunight.
-I'm Steve Jackson.
-This is Wardell Franklin.
-Nice to meet you both.
You look like you must be new customers.
That's right. First time.
I certainly hope you enjoy yourselves
enough to want to come back soon.
You will find us candid and to the point.
Your pleasure is our business,
and you'll find plenty here to your liking.
-I already have.
-Why, thank you.
Why don't you fellas move around,
find something nice to do?
If you get bored here
and are looking for real excitement...
there is always the room
with the red door in the back.
-What's in there?
-Happiness...
-or sadness.
-What do you mean by that?
Why don't you go back there and find out?
And, Mr. Jackson,
you behave yourself, hear?
Mr. Jackson,
I think she was digging on you.
-She sure is a fine-looking mama.
-Yeah.
I thought I said that.
-What you think is going on back there?
-I don't know. Hookers maybe.
Okay, get your bets down.
Coming out.
Get your bets down.
Dice coming out. Leggy Peggy rolling.
Right. Dice here for $100.
-You got it. Anybody else want this?
-I'll take $200 of that, Peg.
Who else thinks the dice is wrong?
-Anybody else?
-Got you.
I'm going to get in this game.
-You're going to get your feelings hurt.
-Loan me some money.
-No.
-Come on, man.
You got to be crazy!
-Give me some money.
-No.
You brothers going to participate
or talk stuff?
-We gonna play, man.
-lt costs $150 to get in this game.
If you haven't got it, agitate the gravel...
and take this lame with you.
-We got the money, chump.
-Get down with it.
Bet up. New point coming out.
-That's right. $50 on the dynamite lady!
-That's right, my brother!
You and me.
I thought you said, "Let's stand."
-Let's go, darling.
-Here we go.
Seven, a winner!
-I'm letting it all ride!
-Let it ride. That's right.
$100 on Miss Peggy Leggy.
-That's right.
-Let's go again.
Here we go. One time more.
-Eleven!
-Still rolling.
-Don't touch a thing!
-Don't touch it?
It's all right. How about just a little bit?
It's all riding again.
Now, all you big-time players
jump on that...
if you think you can stand the strain.
That's right, my sister.
And while you at it, jump on that,
and $5 more for the church.
Jump on it! Come on.
Jump on it some more there.
Your hand moves every time mine moves.
-Roll the dice.
-Again!
-Seven, a winner!
-There you go!
How long you all been open down here?
l've been working for a living.
-Yeah. I know, honey.
-Jump on it. You're my man.
-I got your name and number.
-Right on, brother.
Go ahead, brother.
-Peggy, roll it.
-Here we go!
-Eleven, a winner!
-All right!
What I tell you? I believe in miracles!
Yes, indeed, and Jesus wept.
My goodness, are you still here, brother?
-You must don't have no place to go.
-Here we go!
-Seven!
-Hello, seven!
-Nine.
-Place your bets.
-Nine is the point, darling.
-Here! Now!
-Nine, a winner!
-All right! Respect a sister.
-Send all them to the pawn shop.
-Change the dice.
Yeah, change the dice.
Hell, no! If you all can't stand the heat,
get out the kitchen!
-Harry S. Truman, December 17, 1952.
-That's right.
I was in the kitchen when he said it.
-Eleven!
-Hello!
-The dice have no sense whatsoever.
-Sometimes I don't understand it myself.
Here we go. Tap this. Tap it!
Seven again. Here we go.
You all come on. Please cover this area
because this money is waiting for friends.
Be nice and live.
All right, freeze!
Anybody makes a wrong move
gets put full of holes.
-We mean business!
-Do as you're told and you won't get hurt!
-I can't believe this!
-Shut up!
Everybody, hands up! Slowly!
As high as you can get them !
That's better.
Move away from the table!
Line up over there!
Hurry up!
Move it!
Keep your hands up.
This ain't no time to get brave, turkey.
Put it in the bag.
Give me those rings.
Keep them up.
Just in case
somebody's wearing a heater...
everybody strip down to their underwear,
ladies included.
Move it!
You, too, lady.
I don't wear underwear.
Don't play games.
Just get it off!
Lord, have mercy.
Stay where you are for 10 minutes.
Anybody tries to move before that
gets shot.
I want to thank you, brothers and sisters,
for a very lovely evening.
Never have so few owed
so much to so many.
Good night!
Amen! Truly wonderful!
Be seated, would you please?
We want to thank our choir
for that beautiful and inspiring rendition...
of a spiritual very close to our hearts.
Now I should like, at this time,
to remind those of you...
attending our church picnic next Sunday...
that buses will depart from the front
of the church after the service.
Now, we want to take a moment also...
to ask the weak among you...
to refrain from bringing brown paper bags
to the picnic.
We're gonna have enough
brown paper bags with the lunch in them.
You know what I mean?
I mean, after all,
we are having a church social...
and not a fraternity boat ride!
Now, I repeat, there will be no...
there will be no joy juice allowed!
Let me hear what I said.
No joy juice allowed!
Would you repeat that for me
one more time?
No joy juice allowed!
We will, right after the service,
search all of the choir robes.
I want everybody to understand...
the buses will not leave
before the service is over...
and he who hesitates will be left.
I was hoping to paint the kids' room
before they got home...
so they'd have someplace fresh
to come home to.
Maybe we could shop for some
new carpets, curtains, and candles.
What you think, Steve?
Honey?
Steve, I know you hear me.
Having a good time, honey?
Are you dreaming of me, baby?
Dreaming of a woman?
What you hit me for?
You must have been dreaming.
Who were you dreaming about?
You did hit me.
Sarah!
-Steve, you all right?
-Sarah!
What is it, baby?
-Oh, my God, he's having an attack!
-No, Sarah.
Did we.... Have you....
The lottery ticket I found in your suit
when I took it to the cleaners?
Is that a nine? Is that a one?
And is that a four?
And is that another one and another nine?
Nine-one-four-one-nine?
That's my.... I won. That's my ticket.
How much for? My goodness!
$50,000.
Money, honey
Money, honey
What's wrong?
The lottery ticket!
Is in your wallet?
That was stolen at Zenobia's?
Does Sarah know?
She mad, ain't she?
-What you gonna do?
-I'm going to find that wallet, Wardell.
-How?
-By any means necessary.
I want you to help me, young blood.
I'm your man, homeboy.
What's your first step?
I ain't sure,
but we got to find those robbers.
We can't go to the police.
We can't trust them if they know
what's in the wallet...
and if we don't tell them about it,
they won't waste time looking for it.
So I figure we going to have to get out
in the street...
and keep our ears and eyes open
until we pick up some clues.
We can't get out there ourselves.
For that kind of money? The hell we can't!
Hands up! Turn around and face the wall.
-Man, l--
-Freeze.
No, see, you all got the wrong....
You're wrong. I haven't done anything.
I want a lawyer.
-l--
-Don't say nothing to me!
Do you know
they was going to shoot me? Wardell!
Mistook me for some big, ugly guy
with a beard and a mustache.
-I can understand how--
-Shut up!
We're not doing this stuff anymore.
We're going to get someone who knows
what he's doing. A private detective.
-Where will we find a private detective?
-ln the yellow pages! I don't know!
Mr. Washington?
What do you want?
-We're looking for Sharp Eye Washington.
-Who looking for him?
Steve Jackson,
and this is my friend, Wardell Franklin.
-We want him for a job.
-What kind of job?
Some property of ours was stolen.
We want him to get it back for us.
Cost you $500.
-$500? We ain't got that kind of money.
-$400?
No.
I think we gonna have to go
someplace else.
How about $300?
You sure you're Sharp Eye Washington,
the private detective?
I'm Sharp Eye Washington, the one
and only. Never be another like me.
We're working people.
See, I drive a taxi cab, and I mean, $300....
Oh, man.
You don't know what it is
to be a detective. It's rough.
People are looking for me now.
-Who?
-None of your business who.
Just make up your mind
because I got to split.
How about $200?
All you risk is $200, but I put my life
on the line in service to you.
That's right. It's a lonely, dangerous life
being a private detective.
All you do is risk a little money.
I solve the cases, and people are after me!
Look at my eye, my right eye.
See how bloodshot it is?
Know how it got that way?
From sleeping with one eye open, baby.
Life ain't easy. Always on the move...
people after me with guns. Looking
under the hood of your car for bombs...
peeking out windows,
peering down hallways.
ln the movies, right?
The movies always got some super nigger
killing some white boy in the Mafia...
beating up the crooked police.
That's not true and it don't help me either.
And women. They all got women.
Black detective in the movies
always got a woman.
Watch yourself.
I ain't had a woman in how long? Months!
I might as well be a monk,
and that's what it's like being a detective.
That's the real truth of it.
It's always steady on the case.
I'm getting my thing together, too, baby,
because I'm Sharp Eye Washington.
Steady on the case.
We give you $50 down
and the rest when you find our property.
You got a deal. Just write your name,
address and phone number.
Like I said, you got nothing to worry about
because I'm going to find your property.
The address and the phone number.
$50.
But we ain't told you what we lost.
I was about to bring that up.
It's something very valuable.
Yeah.
-And it's more precious than gold?
-That's right.
-It's a....
-Wallet.
I thought so. What's in it?
Some family pictures...
and some...sentimental souvenirs.
I thought it was something like that.
Well, steady on the case.
Say, man. Hey!
It's just my way of staying one step ahead
of the thieves and hustlers.
Wait.
I know. A wallet.
Listen. Look, wait a minute!
What's that?
I'd like to get 300 tickets
to the policeman's ball.
Your con days are over, Washington.
-He stole our money.
-He stole a lot of people's money, fella.
-We've been on your trail a long time.
-I was framed.
You said that in Des Moines, lowa...
where you were Cleophus Washington,
a preacher.
You escaped from custody.
You said it in Jersey City where...
you were Henry Hawthorne Washington,
a bogus lawyer. You jumped bail.
Your clients are still waiting
for you to handle their cases.
That's my cousin Clarence Washington.
That's not me.
Damn, man, we trusted you.
I mean, why us?
-Why not you, brother?
-Take him away.
Wait a minute. He stole our money.
What do we do about that?
I advise you to go to file a complaint
for the return of the money...
but let me warn you,
you'll be waiting in a long line.
Is the Governor in town?
Get him down here. I want to see him.
-Yes, may I help you?
-We'd like to see Congressman Lincoln.
Excuse me, Congressman Lincoln, there
are two gentlemen waiting to see you.
-Yes, of course, from the Mayor's office.
-No, sir.
Then perhaps the press.
I think not, sir.
They look, well, rather ordinary.
-Constituents?
-Yes, sir.
-Show them in.
-Yes, sir.
-Quick, their names.
-Mr. Franklin. Mr. Jackson.
-Right.
-Show them in.
Yes, sir.
Gentlemen.
Brothers, brothers.
I am so glad to see you.
Mr. Jackson, how do you do?
And Mr. Franklin, I'm delighted to see you.
-I'm Jackson, he's Franklin.
-I'm sorry about that.
Brothers.
Have a seat.
-Now, then, Mr. Wilson--
-Jackson.
Oh, yes, of course.
You see, I am so glad to see you.
lt isn't often I'm privileged to see
our more common folk...
the real salt-of-the-earth folk, you know.
As I was just saying to my beloved wife...
it is because of knowing the ordinary folk
in our daily lives...
that we can keep in touch
with the pulse of the grassroots.
Now, brothers, what can I do for you?
We have this problem--
Problem? Your problems
are my problems...
and our problems are the problems
of all black people.
-We were robbed, Congressman Lincoln.
-No.
-Yes, at gunpoint.
-Gunpoint?
What a shame.
lt wasn't brothers, was it?
They were wearing masks,
but we are sure they were black.
My people.
How long?
Why do we do this to one another?
-Now you were saying you were robbed.
-The other night.
Our wallets, our jewelry...
and some very valuable mementos
that we kept....
Never fear.
Just one simple phone call...
to my good friend Lieutenant Hardcastle
down at police headquarters...
ought to go a long way
in capturing this traitor to our race.
Where did you say
this robbery took place?
Madame Zenobia.
-ls the line busy?
-Madame Zenobia?
You know the place?
Yes.
That is...
l've heard...
of that illegal...
after-hours club.
A den of iniquity.
Yes, a lot of hip people go by there,
people from all different sides of the track.
lrresponsible ingrates, brothers.
You would be well advised not to venture
down that dark path.
Just last week,
I was saying to my beloved wife...
that I would not be caught dead
in such a place.
Hi, how you doing today, sugar?
Oh, I'm sorry.
I didn't realize you were in a conference.
Brother man, what's happening?
-Peggy Leggy.
-No.
Around here, folks call me Mrs. Lincoln.
You know, in spite of
that whole rip-off thing...
child, I had me a ball, I want to tell you!
Peg, dear, must you always speak dialect?
It's so condescending.
We must rid ourselves
of these linguistic shackles.
Honey, hush.
You all have got to forgive my husband.
I love his sweet seIf to death...
but ever since he got a bit of position,
he thinks he's into something.
There was a time
when he still liked fried chicken.
I get so tired
of going to them corny dances...
corny dinners we keep getting invited to...
where you be the token one
and everybody standing around...
looking at you
like you something in the zoo.
I got tired!
About six months ago,
I got old Super Black over here...
to take me to where my folks is.
I figure he'd take me to a dinner,
take me dancing or something...
and, child, he come taking me
to Zenobia's.
He knew all the bouncers,
all the waitresses by their first names...
and come to find out,
he a charter member!
Damn near blew my mind.
This nigger's something else, honey.
You see, I discovered
that a great number of my constituents....
Honey, that ain't nothing
for you to be ashamed of.
Them politicians
you be hanging out with in Washington...
be getting into their pleasures
a whole lot worse of ways than that.
Right, brothers?
How can one work
for the good of one's people...
if one's wife continually airs in public
one's dirty laundry?
The phrase is
"putting one's business in the street."
You see what I mean?
So, what brings
you all around here visiting?
We're trying to get some help...
to track down them stick-up fellas...
'cause we lost some very valuable
property the other night.
I'm sorry to hear that.
And them niggers
interrupted the best roll...
I ever had!
Listen, there's a big-time hood named
Geechie Dan Beauford you should see.
Also, get a rundown on a local hustler
named Little Seymour.
Personally, I think Seymour
is the one who done it, but be careful.
Little Seymour travels with a bodyguard
named Big Percy, who can get real ugly.
-You sure this is the place?
-Yes, I'm sure.
All we got to do is go inside,
see this Little Seymour...
and ask him about our property.
Now, come on.
-You see what I saw?
-Yes, I saw what you saw...
and don't worry about nothing...
because the dude mess with me,
I'll knock him out.
You know why?
Because I'm from off the corners.
Now, come on.
You just let some cat look funny at me
and see if I ain't on his case.
That's right!
Because my money
is in this place someplace, too.
That's right, and where my money
is concerned, I don't play.
I get mean when you mess with my green.
Now, you see if I'm kidding.
Say, man.
Say, brother.
-Say, I'm talking to you, man.
-What you want?
You seen Big Percy around here?
-Who wants to know?
-I'm asking the questions, sissy.
Sissy!
-I asked you a question, chump!
-He ain't here.
Why didn't you say that in the first place?
You dig it? You knock a dude down,
you get some respect.
Come on.
Yeah. Now, you understand
what I'm talking about?
That's the only way to do it.
The American way.
You understand that?
Now, the dude said that Big Percy...
Little Seymour's bodyguard, ain't here.
So let's go get Little Seymour!
-You understand? Go ahead.
-Let's get him.
Now listen here, you all...
I'm looking for...
a corny little runt
named Seymour Petigreau.
I know you're in here, Seymour,
so come on out!
I hear you're so ugly...
till the sun refuse to shine
every time you come out.
You're so ugly...
till it's against the law in 20 states
to marry you.
Yeah, that's it, Steve. You're cooking.
You keep on talking.
He's in here somewhere...
and just remember, I got your back.
And dig, say something about his mama.
-Gotcha.
-That'll get him.
I hear your breath's so bad...
till you put the three leading toothpastes
out of business.
Seymour Petigreau....
Come out!
I'm Little Seymour.
And I'm Big Percy.
What do you turkeys want?
Mr. Seymour, I just got out the hospital.
I was in the war. Veteran.
See, I mean, every once in a while...
I have these fits, you know.
And the fits are....
I mean, I be jumping bad...
and trying to make an impression
on people.
But it's them fits that's doing it.
But then, every once in a while...
they just go down
and then I be myseIf again...
and I don't be jumping bad.
But it's not my fault, Mr. Seymour.
But I'm not reaching for a gun. I got a card.
See, the card says, "If in case of a fit...
"please put this man unharmed in a cab
and send him home to his wife.
"She pay the bill."
So I didn't want you
to get the wrong impression.
You loud-talked me.
Nobody loud-talks Little Seymour.
See, Mr. Seymour, that's.... See, I didn't....
He's the one who loud-talked you.
But, first of all, you got to understand
about his grandmother.
His grandmother brought up him...
and his sisters.
Ever since they was down there
picking cotton, Mr. Seymour.
I know you can identify
with picking cotton.
If you can't, then I can dig that.
But anyway, see, what happens
is the grandmother's an old lady, you dig?
And so his sister's been keeping
life savings on her...
because she don't trust the bank too deep.
Banks are ripping people off and stuff.
And then she went to Zenobia's, you dig?
And in Zenobia's...
was robbed of the money.
And the life savings just went.
So my man said,
"Let's go check out Mr. Seymour."
Because you're highly thought of
in our community, you dig?
I mean, you're even bigger
than Geechie Dan Beauford, you dig?
Anyway he's desperate to talk to you.
That's why he's calling you
all them names.
But if you notice, Mr. Seymour,
he never said nothing about your mother.
So he wasn't that desperate, you see?
Steve, come over here
and apologize to Mr. Seymour.
This is my friend, Steve,
who's going to apologize to you.
Let's get a few things straight.
First, whoever hit Zenobia
is going to pay for it...
with the skin off their tail
when I find out who it is...
because me and her is tight.
And second, that story
you just told me is bullshit.
Yes, sir.
And third...
here's a little something
for niggers who loud-talk Little Seymour.
-Hi, girl.
-Hi, Irma.
-Where are they?
-ln there, child.
-What are we gonna do with these fools?
-I don't know.
No, wait a minute. See, because
first of all, that was the hardest-hitting...
fastest, baddest little black man
of colored descent...
I have ever seen in my life.
-But I had him on the run, didn't l?
-Didn't you?
-Did he hit me with his foot or his hand?
-Both of them, at the same time.
Wardell, honey.
Your imagination's going to get you killed
one of these days.
Now, get up and let me take you home
and try to patch you up.
I'll talk to you tomorrow.
Don't forget, tomorrow we going after
big-time Geechie Dan Beauford.
You got it.
I'm here to see Mr. Geechie Dan.
Wait here.
A man's here to see you, boss.
Bring him over here and sit him down.
Sit down.
Now, what do you want?
Sir, see, it's like this.
Some property of mine was stolen...
and I need some help.
So what you coming to me for?
I heard that don't nothing go down
unless you know about it.
Man, get out of my face.
No. Just a minute, Geechie Dan.
Mr. Beauford.
If you don't get away from here soon...
they are going to be picking up your head
from across the street.
Now move out, sucker.
Wait one minute. Don't be pulling....
Mr. Beauford, please, sir. Please.
Move it!
All right, let's start all over again.
-You all going to tell me something.
-What?
-Anything I want to know.
-We don't know nothing.
Somebody hired you to finger me...
-and I want to know who.
-Nobody hired us to do nothing.
I just came to you
because I was looking for help.
-You're a lying dog, sucker.
-No. I ain't. We told you...
-we don't know nothing about them guns--
-Nigger!
And you, too, hot lips.
I'll talk!
If we talk, are you going to let us go?
How we know you ain't lying?
First off, I don't want you.
I want your boss. And second...
I like you.
And third...
if you all don't tell me everything
I want to know...
we gonna beat
all the black off both of you.
-What you want to know?
-Silky Slim sent you, didn't he?
He wants to control all my territory,
don't he?
That's what I figured.
You all take these two dogs somewhere,
put them to sleep.
-You said you was going to let us go.
-You just confessed, turkey.
-Your ass is grass.
-No.
I can prove who we are.
There's my stub from my paycheck.
My name's on it.
My name.
My bowling club lD, see?
So you are only finger men? So what?
You know too much. Get them out of here.
-Why don't we hit Slim?
-I thought about it...
-but he's hard as hell to get.
-Anyone can be gotten to.
It's funny, man.
One day, I'm on top of the world.
And now this thing with Silky Slim.
He must be crazy!
Think I'll let him move in on my territory
and do nothing about it?
-Right.
-Who does he think he is?
-He's messing with Geechie Dan Beauford!
-Right.
I will kill the punk!
Trying to off me. I will murder the sucker!
Okay, Geechie...
that was your short!
Next time it's going to be your life!
-You got a life, too, Silky Slim !
-I'm giving you two minutes.
We make a deal now...
or you're going to be wearing wings.
-Take your best shot! No deal!
-Come on, man.
-Let's be reasonable.
-Ain't nothing to be reasonable about.
Look, Geechie...
I said let's talk, my man.
You team up with me
and we rule this town from river to river.
Never will so few
owe so much to so many.
-That's the one! He's the one we're after.
-Shut up over there!
But he's the one
who robbed Madame Zenobia's.
So what?
But he stole something that night.
Something he don't know about...
something that's worth a lot of money.
I told you, shut up over there.
Don't bug me with this penny ante crap
at a time like this.
-You've got one minute, Geechie.
-But this ain't no penny ante.
It's worth a fortune.
We'll share it with you, Mr. Geechie Dan.
-You know how much it's worth?
-$300,000.
-What'd you say?
-$300,000 in diamonds.
Slim?
$300,000?
ln diamonds?
Yeah, but he don't know nothing
about it, see?
How you know
they knocked off Zenobia's?
Go on, talk fast, turkey,
or I'll put a hole through your eyes.
'Cause that's what he said
when he robbed the place.
He said, "Never have so few
owed so much to so many."
You see?
And he had a mask on at the time...
but we recognize his voice.
-Yeah. He's the one.
-What about the diamonds?
-Your time's up, Geechie.
-Give me a couple of minutes, Slim.
I'm talking it over with my boys.
One minute, my man.
Go on. Talk.
Me and my man,
we was going to Madame Zenobia's.
And we was behind
these two African gentlemen...
who was going in there.
First, see, the doorman,
he wouldn't let them in.
Then they showed him a letter
from their lawyer...
that said they were very important people
in the diamond business.
So the doorman apologized to them
and he let them in.
Later on that evening, I was in the john.
I was relieving myself.
And the two Africans
came into the bathroom.
Now, they didn't know I was in there
because I was sitting on the john.
And one of them, I heard him say:
"What did you do with the diamonds?"
So the other one said,
"They're in my lawyer's office.
"They'll be safe there
for the next 10 days...
"till we get back from Washington.
"And then the buyer will come in
from California."
The other African said:
"How much you think
we going to get for these stones?"
So the other one said:
"$300,000."
So they left...
and I came running out
to talk to my man...
about getting to the lawyer's office
to hit the place and get them diamonds.
That's when Silky Slim come in
and held everybody up...
and took the wallets and the money,
and along with it, the lawyer's letter...
with the address
of where the diamonds is.
So that's why you've been sniffing around.
-To help you find the letter.
-Yes, sir.
Of course, if you're lying...
the undertaker's going to visit
your relatives.
Okay, Geechie, let me hear it.
All right!
We can make some kind of deal.
-Come on in.
-Good.
Everybody keep their hands
where we can see them.
Make sure you come through that door
the same way.
No, put them away.
My man.
What's happening?
Down to business, Slim.
I don't like your bag.
You got no class.
Drug dealing, prostitution...
vulgar stickups like Madame Zenobia's
last Saturday night.
-That ain't my thing.
-I was home in bed last Saturday night.
No skin off me, man, so let's move on.
Now I got something
we can work on together.
It's a $300,000 proposition.
-I'm interested.
-Fifty-fifty.
And if we wrap it up,
then we can talk maybe...
about some togetherness
on a permanent basis.
What's the deal?
You left Zenobia's the other night
loaded down with personal effects...
among which is a document
that will lead us to the $300,000.
It's a simple document.
lt ain't got no meaning
until I tell you what it connects up with...
and I ain't going to tell you...
until you bring back every bit
of the personal property you lifted.
You won't figure it out
in a million years, Slim.
-How do I know you ain't running a game?
-My word is my rep.
But, of course, if you didn't hit
Madame Zenobia's last Saturday night...
then the whole thing is academic.
You got a deal.
Good.
We'll meet in a neutral place.
I'll let you know where,
when I call you and tell you what time.
I'll be there with three of my boys,
and you show up with three of yours.
-Look to see you around.
-You will.
Order me a new car.
That is if you want to be comfortable
riding around in your own.
Amen! Truly wonderful.
We got to thank our choir.
Sister Louise, you are certainly
in rare form tonight.
Mr. Geechie Dan?
My wallet is in that bag
Mr. Silky Slim's got on his lap there.
And please, sir, may I have it?
This thing go all right, boy,
you can buy yourseIf a dozen wallets...
and fill them all with $100 bills.
That one has family mementos.
If it's all the same to you--
Now, before we leave
on our annual picnic...
I'd like to bring to your attention....
We're going on this picnic.
That way if anything happens,
we got the perfect alibi.
And the saying that comes back
into my mind from that war...
was, "Loose lips sink ships."
Said that, Second World War...
'cause they wanted people
to keep their mouths shut...
and listen a little more.
Loose lips sink ships!
And the looser the lips are,
the faster the ship sinks.
And some of the lips
in this congregation...
done sunk aircraft carriers.
Friends, I say to you tonight...
if we were as fast on the hip
as we are on the lip...
we'd have a bigger church here.
Better know it.
Let me tell you about some of the people
in this congregation.
You know what they're doing?
A lot of the people in this church
have been going around...
spreading falsehoods, lies, and rumors,
trying to ruin the reputation...
of a lot of other people in this church.
They go around trying to rock
somebody else's cradle...
trying to get a piece
of somebody else's pie.
Trying to covet somebody else's mate
for their own.
Amen.
Loose lips...
friends put in motion
by lechery and sinful thought...
is sinking some of the great ships
of marriage.
They are going down on the rocks.
That's what they are doing. Sinking!
Amen.
'Cause lips won't shut up...
and help the buoyancy
keep them floating...
across the top of the river of happiness.
You all know I'm talking
about the loose lips...
that go around kissing on lips
that don't belong to them.
That go around lying on folks...
that make young girls make promises
they know their bodies can't stand.
That's the kind of lips I'm talking about.
We got to learn to control them lips,
tighten up them ears a little tighter!
We got to learn to call on the Lord
and ask him to teach us some discipline!
Remember, children,
loose lips are everywhere.
There's no one place you can go
and all the lips are there.
Loose lips move around.
Loose lips are among you in the pews.
They're among you in the choir.
-Amen.
-Yes, sir.
There are loose lips among the deacons.
Certain things got out about a meeting
we had here last Tuesday night...
that nobody should have known!
Had to be among the deacons.
It's among the children
in the Sunday school...
saying, "l ain't going to put in this money.
"I'm going to spend it on candy."
I done heard so many bad things
about so many of you all...
till I wept with sadness last night.
Last night my heart hung heavy, friends.
I felt so bad,
I almost went out and bought a bottle.
Watch out there, now. Watch out there.
Friends, I fought temptation...
and that's what we gonna
have to learn to do.
When we get the temptation
to let our loose lips loose, fight it!
We got to learn to get off the wrong foot...
and step out on the good foot. Feel good.
When you feel good, you look good,
and you want to do good things.
You want to make other people happy
'cause it makes you happy yourself.
Friends, we need more romance
and less hot pants.
Come on with it now.
Run some water on the hot pants.
Put your sprinkler on and run through,
you want to cool your hot pants off.
We need more midnight sleeping
and less midnight creeping.
Yeah. Lay it on us.
Help us, Lord! Help us!
Somebody got to do something!
-Can I get an amen?
-Amen!
Let's stand here, brother...
as we get ready to dismiss ourselves
for our picnic.
-Can I get one more amen for the Lord?
-Amen!
Truly wonderful, brother!
I want you to call your boss...
and tell him his office
is gonna be burglarized this afternoon...
and have the police stake it out, all right?
-But--
-Just do what I asked you to do.
Something's come up, baby.
I got to be out of the city for a few hours.
Keep everything warm. I'll see you later.
-What it is.
-Move it.
No good.
Maybe we could get into the trunk
through the back seat.
All right, you young ones,
baseball game is about to start!
Everybody on the field. Come on now!
Baseball game is about to start.
All you players on the field.
Man, I ain't had this much fun
since I was in reform school.
-Yeah? Which one was you in?
-Waterbury.
No, I was in Charlottetown. Watch this.
I'm going to steal second on you turkeys.
Try it.
See if you can get me a chisel
and a hammer.
-A what?
-A chisel and a hammer.
-Where am I going to get a chisel?
-Look in the toolbox of the bus, dodo.
Come and get it!
You know,
I had such a time dancing with you.
You're a dainty little thing.
I'd like to take you
to Geechie Dan's place...
and have a time. Yes, I would.
Don't you think it's time you told me...
about what's going on
with your new friends?
We're just working with them
to get the ticket.
-Steve.
-Now, don't worry.
We're closer to that ticket
than you realize. Don't worry.
Okay, if you say so.
I better go get the girls ready
for the African ceremonial pageant.
Give me a kiss. Come on, give me a kiss.
Hello.
Baby, what's happening?
Sure, I can talk.
All right, girl. Split.
No. You stay right where you are.
No. I'll get back to you later. Hang up now.
I'll be a son of a....
-Everything's gone wrong.
-They didn't get the diamonds.
Not only didn't get them,
but they got busted...
all of them, and one of them talked!
No. Not my boys. They don't talk.
Mine neither, but somebody did...
'cause the cops is looking for me and you.
They busted into my apartment
with a warrant for both of us!
Then somebody did talk.
I think you and me better get out of here
so we can kind of talk this thing over.
Let's roll.
-Mr. Silky Slim--
-Out of my way, fool!
We could have been set up.
What about these two?
Maybe we were set up.
Rock gonna check you out good...
and if you ain't clean, I'll come on
back here and pick up your liver.
-Now move out of there, sucker.
-Get that heap out of there.
Boss, look! Trouble!
-Let's get the hell out of here.
-There's only one road out, and that's it!
-We've got to think of something fast.
-You better think of something fast.
-This whole dumb-ass trip was your idea !
-Hang on to your cool, sucker.
There's got to be something.
There's got to be a way out.
Officer Lewis, what's going on?
We have a warrant for the arrest of one
Nickademus Williams, alias Silky Slim...
and one Daniel Beauford,
alias Geechie Dan.
We don't have anybody
in our congregation with names like them.
Geechie Slim. Silky Dan. No.
-You mind if we look around?
-No, sir, Officer. You go right ahead.
-This Slim's car?
-Yeah.
Open it.
Just stay with me.
Nothing here, sir.
They're here someplace.
All you got to do is point them out.
We'll do the rest.
I'm gonna kill you.
-Well?
-I can't, man. They'll murder me.
I can't. They'll do me in.
You understand? I can't do it!
Now, move! Get out of the way!
Mr. Silky, wait! Mr. Silky.
There they go!
Hit the brakes.
That sucker's going to get us killed.
You better get him off of there.
Door's stuck.
Fool, you can't swim !
-You all right, baby?
-I'm fine.
I'm doing all right. How's Wardell?
He's in another wing.
Irma's with him. He's okay.
-And the ticket?
-It's safely hidden away at home.
Sarah, we're on our way.
Now, Sarah,
don't you cloud up on me, girl.
Lookie here.
You got to go shopping for us.
A backyard, a southern one.
I know this restaurant across town,
seafood restaurant...
where they got some of the best food
in the world...
and live music and dancing.
Now that we can afford it, we gonna
have to go out and do this town up right.
I got my red dress...
and my high-heeled sneakers
at home waiting, baby.
Amen!
English