Walter (2015) Movie Script
1
Heaven or hell?
People don't find out where
they're headed until they die.
But I know. I know
where everyone's going.
Because I'm the one
who makes the decision.
This was the moment
my life changed forever.
Because God starting
speaking to me.
He gave me a job.
My purpose in life.
The judgements.
He told me as long as
I trusted my instincts
and did my job...
everything would be alright.
My name is Walter Gary Benjamin.
My friends call me Wally.
My enemies call me
"kid" or "dumbass"
or sometimes "stupid fuck."
My mom has always
gone with Walt,
and my dad, whenever I talk
to him, goes with Walter.
He's God, by the way.
My dad.
And no, I'm not Jesus,
that was someone else.
With a beard.
Eggs?
I have to go to work.
It's an important part of life,
you know, eating.
I'm sorry, but being late
is not an option.
You're never late.
Because I always leave
at the same time. Goodbye.
Well, what if you starve
to death on the way to work?
I won't.
You might!
I won't.
Your bus could crash.
Everybody dies on impact,
except you.
But the paramedics
can't get to you,
because you're trapped,
under all the twisted metal,
and the other dead passengers,
and then there's gas,
all over the road!
Now it doesn't explode,
which is a good thing.
But while they're busy making
all of their explosion
preparations,
who dies of starvation?
You do!
Being who I am
isn't always easy.
The job of deciding
someone's eternal fate
is a great responsibility.
Him, hell.
Her, heaven.
Heaven.
Heaven, hell.
Heaven.
Heaven.
When making a judgement,
I'm required to look
past the obvious.
Heaven. Heaven. Heaven.
Most of the time, I'm able to
do my job without question.
But it's hard for me on
this particular city bus.
When I was eleven, I took this
same bus to the hospital
with Jim a lot.
He told me if he could
fight fires for a living,
a little disease was
nothing to worry about.
Then everything's gonna be okay?
Then everything's gonna be okay.
Dad, when I grow up,
I'm gonna be...
Look at this kid,
all eager and shit.
I take the time out of
my day to address
your quirky little dumbass self,
and you're just
gonna blow me off?
I'm working, Vince.
No, you're vacuuming.
I'm working.
Constantly. See, I got this call
back on this jack-in-the-box
spot they're shooting
up in Chi-town.
Corey gave each of us a list
of pre-matinee duties
that we're supposed to...
Corey gave up on life
when he gained 40 pounds,
opted against using Rogaine
and decided to manage
a fuckin' movie theatre
was an acceptable career choice.
He's still our boss.
No, he's your boss.
My boss is Brando.
My boss is motherfucking Denzel.
My... my boss is that guy
who played Gandhi
in that old-ass Gandhi movie.
Corey ain't shit.
What was that?
Ha! You know, I saw you
creeping up my perphery.
You like what I was doing there?
I was like, you know,
"Corey ain't shit!",
knowing the whole time
you were coming right up on me.
That's funny!
Theatre 3 has puke
in one of the aisles,
just for you, Vince.
Yeah. Yeah, my boy,
he's all over that.
Usually, when someone
identifies you by name,
they're talking to you.
Unless you've changed
your name to Douchebag.
Lobby looks good.
Thank you.
The lobby floor is highest on
my list of pre-matinee duties,
so I always make sure to...
Jesus Christ.
- Undigested Milk Duds.
- Look at 'em.
No thank you.
Just fuckin' look at 'em!
You're seein' general human
condition bullshit
going on right in there, man!
It's just a metaphor for life,
stupid fuck!
That's Kendall.
Definitely heaven.
I've liked her since the moment
she started working here,
but she's Concessions.
I'm Tickets.
Yo, Kendall!
If only I can figure out
how to talk to her.
It's about time, Wally...
She says, cueing the music.
She says something cool, poetic.
Something cool,
poetic.
I respond with equally profound
yet effortless banter.
Words, words, words.
I love you.
You're staring.
What?
You're staring, dumbass.
I wasn't staring.
No, whatever you say,
Brokeback Rain Man.
Vince!
What?
Stop.
Hey, it's cool.
I'm... I'm all secure
in my shit.
Like, I don't want you to think
that I'm hatin' on
the goofy bitch, I just...
I'm totally into the ladies,
so I gotta be like,
"Yo, you know, keep the homo
party on that side of the...
"the lobby, 'cause
I only bang chicks."
You know what I mean?
Look, it's okay,
don't feel bad about yourself.
I got an appeal.
It's an it-factor.
I wasn't staring.
Does this normally work for you?
What?
When you talk.
Dramatic tension.
Wow.
I wasn't staring at Vince.
Umm... I'm gonna go
set up before we open.
Well, w... I wasn't staring.
I wasn't.
- Even for the most dedicated
- Cineplex employee,
there are extended
gaps of down-time.
I spend mine watching movies.
Comedy, romance, action,
whatever it is Tyler Perry
thinks he's doing.
As long as I can just watch.
No judging.
Heaven. Heaven.
What...
- Theatre 1 to your left.
- Heaven.
Theatre 2. Heaven.
Theatre 8 to your right. Hell.
Hello?
What do you want?
Good day at work?
Fine. It was fine.
I made eggs.
I'm... I'm not... I'm not...
Are you sick?
No.
Oh, Walt, you don't look good.
Did you catch something?
I'm fine.
I told you to get a flu shot.
You're working at
that movie theatre,
with all those people
with butter
and bathroom doorknob
feces on their hands.
I'll get the thermometer.
Heaven, heaven.
Listen, man, I don't
know what's wrong...
Hell.
But I need it today,
not tomorrow.
Heaven. Heaven.
Heav...
Heaven.
Heav...
Hell. Heaven.
Theatre 3 to your left. Heaven.
Theatre 2 to your right.
Polo heaven, tank-top hell.
Anybody say he'd be your
Prince Charming?
Do you think or you just
completely...
Uhh, Theatre 4 right...
uhh, to your right. Hell.
Hello?
Come on, man, I'll miss my movie.
Oh, no, no, no, no.
Where are you going, ticket guy?
Just make the judgement, kid.
This is not...
Yes or no,
up or down, heaven or hell,
I really don't care,
but I can't be here any longer.
You're not...
you're not even...
I know who you are.
This isn't...
This isn't...
Do your job.
- I can't get a reading...
- Can I get a new ticket guy?
Mine's broken.
Do... your... job.
Must be nice.
If I had a direct line like you,
I wouldn't have to do this.
Do what? Who are you?
I'm Greg.
Greg?
Yeah. Gregory Douglas Tomlinson,
if that helps with
the paperwork.
How do you...
Hmm? How do I what?
Know who I am. No one knows.
No one living, at least.
Boo.
It's a stupid joke.
It's... I just...
I've been waiting a long time
to try that out, so...
You're dead.
My lack of colour give me away?
That's why I couldn't
get a read.
So what's the plan?
How did you find me?
I'm dead, Walter.
I'm dead and I'm talking to you.
I judge the living.
You judge everyone.
Everyone living!
So I'm...
I'm stuck here like this?
I don't know! I... I don't...
Well, I can't!
Living, dead,
what's the difference?
I told you, I can't
get a read...
A read, a read, right, whatever.
Uhh, make a guess.
I honestly don't care
where you send me,
just get me outta here.
Flip a goddamn coin!
It doesn't work that way.
Why not?
Because I have to know.
Who cares?
He does.
I have to be right,
that's how it works.
And how does that happen
with normal people
who aren't, you know, dead?
I just see them and I know.
You do all this
on a fuckin' hunch?
I wouldn't expect you to
understand how I work.
There's certain... mysteries
that can't be explained.
Mysterious ways, right.
Godspeak for bullshit.
Can't feel anything.
You have any idea
what that's like?
I'm sorry, but I...
I still can't help you.
What's the harm
in trying, Walter?
I have work to do,
and anything that keeps me
from doing that work
is harmful, so please...
Go away.
Okay, I know I promised
not to talk about it...
I'm fine.
You don't look fine.
I told you we're
not talking about it.
Well, you have kind of
a plague-y look.
Plague-y?
Well, a pre-plague-y look,
but that's how it starts.
I don't have the plague.
Ohh, The plague.
As if there's only one.
Goodnight, Mom.
Okay, okay, okay.
This time I promise:
We will not talk about it.
You won't keep that promise.
How do you know?
Because you've broken it five
times since we started eating.
Well, then tell me!
Tell you what?
Whatever it is!
You're gay.
What?
Aren't you?
I'm not gay.
It's okay if you are.
But I'm not.
Well, you're something.
Something not gay!
The book said you'd say that.
And the book about
having a depressed son
said I would deny being
depressed if confronted,
and so did the one about
having an alcoholic son,
and a cutter,
and a crystal meth addict, and... Hey.
I mean, it makes the most sense.
And I want you to know that
I am totally okay with it.
Goodnight, Mom.
Walt!
I'm not sick, I'm not gay
and I'm not hungry.
Whatever's going on with you,
you have to talk about it.
If not with me,
then with somebody.
There must be good
therapists out there.
We can find one.
Walt?
Walt!
I'm not dead, Mom.
Just checking.
Karen?
Karen Benjamin?
No.
Oh, my Christ, is that you?
I haven't seen you in so...
Honey, hug!
Oh...
Oh, yeah, we're doin' it!
How are you?
I'm great.
I gotta tell you,
that office was never
the same after you left, mmm-mm.
Oh...
Really.
What have you been doing?
How's little Walter?
Oh, I guess he's not
so little anymore.
Gotta be in college
by now, right?
Yeah, college and...
girlfriend.
I mean, he's great.
We're... we're... we're great.
Oh, that's great!
Umm...
Wow!
Oh, well, you know,
we ran out of eggs.
Hey, Walter.
You want some popcorn?
I made it just for you.
Special.
With extra butter...
and bathroom doorknob feces.
Let me know how many eggs
you want for breakfast, Walt.
Wally?
Walter!
Walter.
Walter...
Don't be like that, Walter.
Go away!
That's all I'm trying
to do, buddy, go away.
Forever.
Leave me alone!
Not a chance.
Wanna snuggle?
Stop!
Stop! You have to stop!
You have...
Are you gone?
Is this destructive
ghost silence,
or "gone forever because you've
realized I can't help you"
silence?
Walt?
I'm... I'm fine!
Every... everything's fine.
I can hear you yelling in there.
You can go away now,
'cause everything's okay,
and I just need to start
getting ready now, so I...
Umm... I have
your clothes ready.
Thank you.
I'll just...
Everything's fine?
Oh, I forgot the battery.
What?
You asked me to get one
with a battery for a backup.
Right. Batteries.
It's important to be on time.
Well, everything's fine.
I need to get ready now.
I have a lot to do today, so...
Okay.
Does it help?
What?
If something's wrong with you,
if something isn't
making sense...
does it help to talk
to someone about it?
Yes.
I really need to start
getting ready now.
As soon as I'm done hugging you.
Walter Benjamin.
That's my name, yes.
That is your name.
Walter Gary Benjamin.
Ohh. You hiding bodies,
Walter Gary Benjamin?
Bodies?
You got a sort of serial killer
kind of name.
Anyone ever tell you that?
No.
Of course not, that's
a terrible thing to say!
So, what kind of crazy are you?
- I'm not crazy.
- Sure.
But since you're here,
might as well pretend
you're not completely
sane and normal
so that I can pretend
to make you less crazy.
You ever been in therapy before?
No.
Your mom said that
after your dad died,
she took you to at least
ten different therapists.
He wasn't my dad.
Who?
I didn't come here
to talk about him.
Well, who'd you come
to talk about?
Greg.
Greg.
He's a ghost.
Greg's a ghost.
Yes.
And that's who you came
to talk about?
Greg, the ghost?
Yeah.
I'm not supposed to see ghosts.
That was never...
There's a plan.
Of course there is.
But I can't really
get into that.
Greg needs to go.
Okay? He's not supposed
to be here, so...
there must be something
wrong with me, in my brain?
If you know how to fix this,
I need you to do it
as quickly as possible,
because it's starting to have
a very negative effect
on my work.
Could we go back
to Jim for a second?
I'd rather not.
Well, of course you wouldn't,
but I'm a doctor,
this is my office,
and I'm bigger than you,
so let's do it
my way for a second.
Is Jim a ghost too?
If I tell you, you have to
promise not to get angry.
Why would I get angry?
Because you're going to hell.
Tell me something I don't know.
You have the most beautiful
eyes, you should show those.
You should really show those,
they're really nice.
Thank you.
Damn, they'd look really
good for cameras...
That picks it up, and then
when you down the iris scope...
She's beautiful.
Yes, she is.
Gonna talk to her?
You don't exist
and I have work to do,
so I'd rather not have
this conversation.
Just say the word, and I'm gone.
Go!
That's not the word
I'm lookin' for.
Mine starts with an "H",
preferably two syllables,
but I'll take what I can get.
Go away!
Talk to her, and I will.
Really?
Not forever, O Chosen One.
You're not getting rid of me
'til you do your job.
But I'll give you
the afternoon off.
And all I have to do
is just... go... just...
Talk to her like
a person would, yeah.
But I don't think
you have the balls.
I've got plenty of...
balls.
Prove it.
Hi. What's going on?
Uhh, maybe if there's
some free time after
all the matinees start, I could
buy you some Junior Mints
or something. But you wouldn't
have to eat them with me,
they... they'd be a gift for you
to enjoy at your own leisure.
Umm, actually... all of us back
here kinda just...
borrow the candy that we want,
for free,
so we don't have
to pay for it. Shh.
I'm right here.
It's fine, he doesn't care.
See ya later.
"Maybe after the matinees start,
"I could buy you some
Junior Mints or something?"
That was fucking beautiful, bro.
Really, I mean it.
I'm actually... I'm... I'm a
little hard right now,
having just experienced
the joy of watching you do
your thing, man!
That was great!
My mom says that you're supposed
to treat women with respect,
and talk to them about things
that they're interested in.
And Kendall sells Junior Mints...
Oh, God, hey,
I know you're all in love with
her and shit, it's cool.
I get it. But, I should
let you know that, umm,
as your co-worker, and I like
to think as your friend, that...
I'm probably gonna
nail that at some point.
Like, really hard!
Oh yeah, she got a crazy side.
Has some sort of breakdown
or something
at that fancy-ass college
she was going to.
Yeah, plus, I heard
she ain't talked to her dad
since she tried
to go pro as a cutter.
You know what I mean?
Yeah. I kinda like that.
Unstable bitches
are the shit, bro.
You know, I don't want
to ruin, you know,
what you and I have,
'cause I like to think that
you and I have like
a Of Mice and Men thing.
You know, I'm George.
Or Lennie. Whichever one
isn't the fuckin' retard,
and I don't wanna
ruin that, you know?
So, for... for your sake,
and for our sake, really,
just try not to picture her
riding my dick.
Even though it's
totally gonna happen.
Yo, Kendall!
You pictured it. Ah, it's cool,
man. You're welcome.
I didn't picture it!
I didn't picture it.
I do.
Most people seem really worried
about being alone.
I guess I can understand
how someone can see life
as random and meaningless.
Even cruel, at times.
So it makes sense
they'd spend most,
if not all of their time,
doing their best to ensure
they don't have to go
through it by themselves.
Safety in numbers, I suppose.
Not sure I understand the rules
of this particular game,
but I'm pretty sure
we're both losing.
So, how'd it go with the girl?
Fine.
You sure about that?
Go away!
Make me.
You know I can't do anything...
We've got a big day
ahead of us, Walter.
Figure we should get going soon,
so I can get you back
in time for work.
Back?
You do have, like,
adults' clothes, right?
Back from where?
Huh? Field trip.
What?
A Son of God, I would think
a clothing allowance
would be in order.
Why are we... I'm not going
on a field trip with you.
You're not even real!
I have a therapist now.
Ohh. Yeah, you know, he's...
gonna fix this, so...
I'm not going anywhere with you,
and even if I did,
I'm not capable of sending you
to Heaven or Hell,
so you're just gonna have
to get help with your problem
from someone else.
Okay?
Huh? Sorry, didn't catch
most of that,
I was too busy suffering from
the weight of ten years
of unrealized post-death
eternity to hear you.
Care to run all
that by me again?
That's the best you got?
I can't wear that.
A church?
Stop messin' with your suit,
you look fine.
I do?
No, but we're late.
You never told me how.
How what?
You were able to find me.
Mysterious ways, I guess.
I still don't know
what we're doing here,
and I haven't been inside a
church since Jim's funeral,
and I just... I don't...
the suit's really uncomfortable!
It's making my thighs
all sweaty,
and I don't understand what...
And then we'll go
through your vows.
You've both written them
by now, yes?
We'll have them done
by tomorrow, I promise.
This is weird, we shouldn't be here.
Not yet.
"Wind Beneath My Wings",
a capella.
Look, we should leave.
Okay, alright,
and then we'll have the
presentation of the rings.
That's your cue.
And, uhh...
Mason.
...don't chew gum throughout
the ceremony...
Who's Mason?
My son.
Baby girl. Goddamn
beautiful baby girl.
You have a family?
Had. Had, yeah.
Now, to her credit,
it took her almost
a decade to re-marry.
All this time,
you've just been...
I don't stalk 'em or anything.
Anymore. I just keep tabs.
Make sure everyone's okay.
I mean, the new guy's
a little stiff.
Pretty sure he's breathin'.
So...
So what?
Where are they headed?
You... you mean...
I'm assuming that you
judge 'em one by one.
You don't have, like,
an afterlife family plan
or anything, right?
Look, this isn't, really...
So, they're gonna be okay?
I...
I mean...
She's not perfect.
But for whatever it's worth,
she doesn't deserve Hell.
And if you even think about
fucking over
either one of my kids...
I can't talk about it.
What?
Other people's judgements
is not for anyone else to know.
Come on.
I can't.
That's my fuckin' family.
Not anymore!
And you're off to start your
life as husband and wife,
happily ever after.
Sound like a game plan?
Thank you!
I'm sorry.
No, that's good.
That's good. It's... you know
you got your rules.
Certainly convenient.
Where are you going?
I'm late for work!
Nothing to worry about, kiddo.
Just some more tests.
Tests for what?
Well... come here.
They wanna know if
I'm really from Mars,
or if I'm just weird.
You should get tested too.
You're weird. Are you weird
or just a Martian, Walter?
Jim Benjamin.
Jim Benjamin.
Wish me luck.
Okay, uhh, do you know
the number?
Yeah. I just need you to sign for that,
it's the top form.
And then, uhh,
I'll be back in a bit.
Alright. Sorry!
Thank you.
Oh, man, you're making this shit
too easy on me, Rain Man.
Hey, by the way,
you're late, motherfucker.
What?
Wally!
Wally.
Hello, Kendall.
How's your day going...
so far... today?
Umm, it's... it's good.
Yes, it's, uhh,
it's good so far.
Good.
Hey, tell me to just
shut up if I'm prying,
or anything, but the
past couple days,
you've seemed a little off,
or something.
I'm fine, thank you.
Cool suit you got there.
It's too small.
And very uncomfortable
in a variety of places,
and it's making my thighs
continue to sweat even though
I'm now in a very well
air-conditioned building.
I feel weird now.
No, Wally...
Goodbye.
Well, well, well,
you are exactly...
You're late.
Which means you have to do
Vince's shit-work.
But I'm the ticket-taker/
ticket-tearer.
Sorry, Miho,
I don't make up the...
What is... what are
you wearing?
A suit.
I didn't even know
you had other clothes.
It's too small.
Yeah, a little bit.
At least pretend to be
a little rattled.
I'm a ghost, man!
You owe me that much.
I'm working.
Yeah, apparently.
You made me late.
So?
I'm never late.
Hey, I'm sorry, but...
What's the Son of God doing
working at a movie theatre?
Shouldn't you be, like,
curing lepers or something?
Miracles were phased out
over a thousand years ago.
I'm pretty sure lepers don't
go to the movies very often.
Never answered my question.
The lobby offers constant access
to new people for judgment.
Just makes sense to work here.
Bullshit!
There'd be like three times
as many people
at McDonalds or the
fuckin' DMV. Why here?
He used to take me here a lot.
Who?
Jim.
Who's Jim?
Even after he got sick.
"A nice escape from reality,"
he called it.
Walter...
So now I work here.
But instead of doing
my cineplex duties,
I'm the trash collector/
trash emptier,
which is the punishment
for being late,
which I only am because of you,
which... which I don't
even think
you've properly acknowledged.
You miss him?
- They don't miss me.
- I mean, you know.
I have to go back to work.
You know her, don't ya?
Who?
Allie.
The way you looked at her,
at the church.
I need to get back inside...
How do you know her?
Just please leave me alone.
I'm not gonna watch her walk
down that aisle, Walter.
It has to be now!
Do your job!
No!
Church? Really?
I know we talked about this.
You let Greg the ghost take you
to a house of worship?!
You did that!
Can I just explain...
Hold on, I've gotta
get another lap in
before I listen to this.
Oh, my...
Alright.
Go.
I just thought that...
It's crazy.
What?
It doesn't matter
what you're about to say
if what you're about to say is
you went to church
with a dead guy.
Who we both had agreed
was not an actual dead guy,
but the kind of dead guy
only crazy people see!
But, you don't...
Crazy!
And I will be completely
honest with you.
You're lookin' a bit off at the moment.
Off?
Not that you were ever
a picture of "on." No...
Should I leave?
Yes.
Really?
You didn't have an appointment.
You said I could come in!
Why did you come here?
Because I think that this
is an emergency.
No, no, I mean, why did you
come here initially?
I... came here to...
To?
Stop seeing the...
To stop seeing Greg the ghost,
that's why you came here.
You knew enough to know that
seeing dead people was crazy.
So why,
Walter Gary Benjamin,
are you now going on
dates with him?!
He's very persistant!
Leave.
What?
Seriously, you gotta go.
But... but... I'm trying...
Crazy.
He... you don't understand.
He seems real.
Crazy. He's got a family,
and I know they're real.
Straight-up batshit.
I'm sorry, Walter, but that's
my professional opinion;
You're beyond fixing. Goodbye.
You know Greg
ain't the problem, right?
I just came here because
I just... I just need...
I know why you think
you came here,
but that doesn't help me,
and I doubt it's doing
much for you either.
Aren't you supposed to ask me
questions about stuff?
Isn't that how this works?
It's a pretty popular
approach, yeah.
What do you think you should
be asking me about?
I got these pages and pages
of notes here,
mostly stuff about Greg.
And try as I might,
with my undeniable
talent and insight,
I can't seem to come up with a
single worthwhile question
out of any of this.
But...
There is one question
we touched on briefly
that I'm thinking might
merit a second look.
Who's Jim?
I love the movies, Dad...
Come on, Walter.
No one is coming.
And we're all gonna starve
to death if we stay up here.
What are you saying?
I'm saying that those things
are still in the house,
and if we stay up here
with no food or no water,
we're all gonna die.
First David.
Then Mersp, Centreller.
And then Teller.
There is no search and rescue.
We're gonna have to leave.
First, someone's gonna have
to go get it,
and bring it around
the other side of...
Hey, Wally.
Uhh... how'd you know
it was me?
What about me?
You're always sort of here,
aren't you?
Hopefully they'll stay
where I can see really well.
I guess I love movies.
I know. I'm sure
you do, but...
it's different
for you, isn't it?
I don't know, Taylor,
what if they...
Everything sort of is.
You know what happens if we stay up here.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry, I'm just...
The crazy thing is,
I really like this movie.
Well, then why are you crying?
These guys are gonna
be chasing you,
so you'll have
to punch the car...
I don't know.
We're all broken, Wally.
But maybe that's okay.
You got it?
I got it.
Okay, I'm going.
Please go away.
Whatcha prayin' for?
The girl?
It's the girl, right?
Askin' Daddy to pull
a few strings? I like it.
I mean, if the Son of God can't
get the girl of his dreams,
really, what chance does
true love have in this world?
Why are you doing this?
Allie will be someone else's
wife in less than an hour.
Please.
I can't help you.
What if I told you everything?
What?
Like everything.
The stuff that you normally
see when you...
look into someone's
soul or whatever.
I'll just lay it out there.
It doesn't work that way,
and even if it did,
how would I know you were
telling me the truth?
You don't even
have the instincts
to tell if a man's lying or not?
Ask me anything!
You think I'm bullshitting you
in any way,
I will leave you alone forever.
I can't really get into the logistics...
She was gonna leave me.
Why are you telling me this?
You might understand this...
unrequited pining thing
or whatever you're doing
with Popcorn Girl, but, uhh...
to actually have the girl,
to have her love you...
like, start a family together...
to know someone in such a
perfect way, like completely,
that's the best, man.
That's the best. I had that.
So you think I'm afraid of Hell?
That's Hell. Worse than Hell.
Having that, losing it.
Don't need you or God
or anyone else
to explain that to me.
So what do you say, Walter?
Walter?
Deal with me, you chicken-shit
little bitch...
How'd you die?
What am I supposed...
How did you die?
I mean...
she was my life.
I answer your question,
and you run off.
Poor form, Son of God.
Poor form. What are you doing?
We have to go.
Go where?
Another field trip.
No.
You think it started already?
What does it matter?
It's not like you're invited.
Whoa, hey, Walter!
I need to talk to her!
Whoa!
Don't do this, man!
You can't just show up
at her wedding.
Hey, hey, what's the plan here?
Excuse me.
...honourable estate.
Excuse me!
Made by God in Paradise,
into its holy...
Excuse me!
Uhh... sorry, sorry.
I'm sorry to interrupt.
Son, I'm sorry, this is
a private ceremony.
I need to talk to the...
I'm gonna have to ask you to leave right now.
My name is Walter Gary Benjamin,
I need to talk to the bride!
Really?
Wait!
It's okay, I know him.
Uhh, Allie...
Can you give us a minute?
Please?
Just trust me, I...
You yell if you need me.
I will.
I gotta say, your timing
could use some work.
Do you know why I'm here?
Do you?
You were at the rehearsal too,
weren't you?
I couldn't quite place
you then, but...
You look just like him.
Are you okay?
No.
No, I'm not.
Walter.
Walter?
Oh, this smells so good.
Well, you probably won't be able
to keep much down
once you start chemo.
I figured you should have a shot
at some real food beforehand.
Last meal, so to speak.
Don't say that.
Is it bad... that I love you?
I'm sorry, I shouldn't...
No, no, no, no.
It's okay.
Doctor Forrest, dial 118,
please.
Doctor Forrest,
please dial 1-1-8.
Mom?
Mom? Mom! Mom!
Stop it, stop it.
Stop it! Stop!
Stop!
No, stop, stop!
Walter?
Wal... hey, Walter, honey,
take a deep breath.
Are you okay? I'm calling 911.
No, Darren, he's...
This is crazy!
Walter, it's okay, honey.
No, no, no...
Okay, look, take a deep breath
and come sit down
for a moment, okay?
She is a nurse, listen to her!
Okay, Darren...
I should go.
I loved him!
If that matters.
So did I.
And it doesn't.
Hey!
Told you it was a bad idea.
Why didn't you say anything?
Look, man, I had my own shit
to figure out here.
How was I supposed
to know about...
Wait, you knew about Jim
and Allie this whole time?
Look, I think maybe we should,
uhh, calm down a bit, before...
Answer the question.
Of course I fuckin' knew.
You gonna try
and tell me you didn't?
What?
I mean, really.
How long do we keep doing this?
I didn't even know
that she existed
until you brought me
over here yourself.
We both know nothing happened
that you didn't already know.
No, no, no. Everything made
sense until you showed up.
Everything made sense
until you started
thinkin' about shit.
No, no-no, no-no.
Don't, don't.
Don't!
Hey, man, why am I still here?
Leave me alone!
If you wanted me
to leave you alone,
you would have done your job!
But maybe,
it's not really
your job, after all.
How do you know?
Come on.
Really? We're doing that?
Alright.
Leave me alone!
Okay.
You know, I did a
little cross-country
in high school.
Plus I'm dead!
So I don't have to,
you know, breathe!
You might wanna re-think the
"outrunning me" plan!
Leave me alone!
That worked out well for ya.
Get outta here.
You know, I forgave her.
Allie.
A long time ago, actually.
That's the funny thing
about bein' dead:
You don't really dwell on the
things that you'd expect to.
See, the only thing that
really sticks with you,
haunts you even,
is the overwhelming feeling
that you were alive,
you fucking existed,
and you wasted it.
Ten years is
a long time to waste.
You ready?
You tell me.
Walt?
Mom.
I heard...
I sent Jim to Hell.
What?
I sent Jim to Hell
right after he died,
and there's nothing
I can do about it now.
Are you feeling okay?
Would you like me
to make you some eggs?
I'm not hungry.
Maybe I should make up a batch,
just in case your body is so
calorie-deprived you're...
starting to feed on your organs.
I'm not hungry, Mom.
Now see, that's the thing
about the more advanced
stages of starvation...
I'm not fucking hungry!
I sent him to Hell.
Don't you want to know why?
You're not making any sense.
We never talk about it,
but you knew, didn't you?
I think you need some sleep...
He broke your heart.
That's what you need.
Walt... He broke your heart,
and I sent him to Hell for it.
Walt... You used to be different.
You used to be happy.
You weren't always like...
Like what?
Like this!
Your father was a good man!
And her husband...
that woman had a husband,
in case you didn't know that,
her husband found out,
and he killed himself, Walt...
because Jim and Allie cared
more about themselves
than they ever did
about anybody else!
Your father made a mistake!
Now, you can't
blame him for that!
Jim wasn't my father.
Will you stop it?
You stop it, right now!
He wasn't perfect!
But he loved us, and you.
He loved you more than anything!
More than Allie?
That's enough!
Do you wanna know what
broke my heart, Walt?
Really?
Because it wasn't just him
messing around with some nurse,
right after he found out
he was dying.
Yeah, that hurt.
And I let him know.
But it couldn't erase
a lifetime with him.
Not even close!
And it wasn't even him dying.
I had the strength to get us
through losing him.
And you're right,
I was different then.
I was strong, Walt!
I was strong enough
to watch him die!
But it wasn't losing him
that broke me!
It was losing you
that killed me.
Now there's eggs on the wall,
and on the floor,
if you're hungry.
Hell, hell.
Hell.
Hell.
Hell, hell, hell. Hell.
Theatre 6 down the hall
to your right. Hell.
Theatre 1, down the hall
to your left.
Hell.
Theatre 6, hell.
Hell. Hell.
You're all going to hell!
- What?
- All of you.
Okay.
You look like shit.
Forgive me for stating the
obvious, but it's so obvious
I felt personally and
professionally obligated
to say something about it.
When's the last time you slept?
I don't know.
Ate?
Eggs.
I think I had eggs.
When?
I don't... I don't remember.
Well, I won't ask about bathing,
'cause I think I know
the answer to that one.
How's Greg?
You know, your ghost friend.
I thought you didn't
wanna talk about Greg.
I don't, but you do, right?
Not anymore.
Well, that's why
we're here, right?
Your ghost problem?
I'm not crazy.
Are you sure?
I don't...
I don't know. I... I...
You're just supposed to...
What am I supposed to do?
Just stop. Just stop.
What am I doing, Walter?
You know!
You know! You...
you always know what you...
God, you know exactly what...
I can't... I can't.
I don't know. I don't know.
I don't know. I don't know.
I had control.
You can sit there,
and you can... and you can
tell me what's real,
and what's crazy,
and what's total bullshit
and you can say that
I'm just some kid who doesn't
know how to function properly
in the world, you can say all
that. Okay? Fine. Fine.
But I had control.
I woke up every day
and I went outside,
and I did something.
I did something. I never...
I never took a personal day,
I never called in sick,
I never made excuses
for why life is unfair, I...
I... figured out my place.
I see so many people
that are just...
they're just wasting
so much time,
doing nothing.
And that's crazy.
That's crazy.
They're...
Things can happen. Things can
happen. They can be bad.
They can be worse than bad.
They... they...
they can destroy you
if you let them.
If you even acknowledge them,
they can destroy you,
so I took control
and I made rules,
and I followed them
without question,
and I... and I...
I thought... I just thought...
I thought that if I did that,
then nothing...
could tear me apart,
the way... the way that
cancer did with Jim,
that life did with my mom.
Sounds crazy?
Does this sound crazy?
I know this... I know.
I know it sounds crazy,
I know it sounds crazy, I...
I probably am crazy.
I just...
I just need you to help me.
I just need you to help me.
That's what I...
I just need...
I just need you to help me.
I need help.
I'm sorry.
You know how something
really funny
just pops into your head
at like the worst times?
And the more you try
not to laugh,
the funnier... here I was,
sitting here,
hoping for something
really good,
some legit case-study
crazy shit.
And instead...
...and this is the funny part,
the joke I can't help
but laughing at...
you're not crazy.
What do you mean?
You're fine.
This is okay.
You're not crazy.
You are not crazy.
You just forgot to grieve.
Time's up.
Hey, Walter...
I don't mean to put you
on the spot or anything,
but am I still going to hell?
I don't know.
I'll see you next week.
Mom?
Mom?
How'd you sleep?
Okay.
I hate not making you anything,
but, um, I didn't
want to be late.
Late?
I, um, have an interview...
for a job.
That's great, Mom.
Yeah.
Yeah, it is.
Have a nice day at work, Walt.
Thank you.
- My name is
- Walter Gary Benjamin.
My friends call me "Wally."
My mom has always
gone with "Walt."
And my dad, whenever
I talked to him,
he'd go with "Walter."
He's dead, by the way, my dad.
But I'm not.
Oh, late again, stupid fuck.
Hey, you keep this up,
you're going to be the permanent
trash bitch around here.
Vince?
Yeah?
Fuck you.
When you're late, I can't
give Vince the shit work
and I enjoy giving
Vince the shit work.
Hey, you don't
have your vest on.
Hey.
Hey.
Heaven or hell?
People don't find out where
they're headed until they die.
But I know. I know
where everyone's going.
Because I'm the one
who makes the decision.
This was the moment
my life changed forever.
Because God starting
speaking to me.
He gave me a job.
My purpose in life.
The judgements.
He told me as long as
I trusted my instincts
and did my job...
everything would be alright.
My name is Walter Gary Benjamin.
My friends call me Wally.
My enemies call me
"kid" or "dumbass"
or sometimes "stupid fuck."
My mom has always
gone with Walt,
and my dad, whenever I talk
to him, goes with Walter.
He's God, by the way.
My dad.
And no, I'm not Jesus,
that was someone else.
With a beard.
Eggs?
I have to go to work.
It's an important part of life,
you know, eating.
I'm sorry, but being late
is not an option.
You're never late.
Because I always leave
at the same time. Goodbye.
Well, what if you starve
to death on the way to work?
I won't.
You might!
I won't.
Your bus could crash.
Everybody dies on impact,
except you.
But the paramedics
can't get to you,
because you're trapped,
under all the twisted metal,
and the other dead passengers,
and then there's gas,
all over the road!
Now it doesn't explode,
which is a good thing.
But while they're busy making
all of their explosion
preparations,
who dies of starvation?
You do!
Being who I am
isn't always easy.
The job of deciding
someone's eternal fate
is a great responsibility.
Him, hell.
Her, heaven.
Heaven.
Heaven, hell.
Heaven.
Heaven.
When making a judgement,
I'm required to look
past the obvious.
Heaven. Heaven. Heaven.
Most of the time, I'm able to
do my job without question.
But it's hard for me on
this particular city bus.
When I was eleven, I took this
same bus to the hospital
with Jim a lot.
He told me if he could
fight fires for a living,
a little disease was
nothing to worry about.
Then everything's gonna be okay?
Then everything's gonna be okay.
Dad, when I grow up,
I'm gonna be...
Look at this kid,
all eager and shit.
I take the time out of
my day to address
your quirky little dumbass self,
and you're just
gonna blow me off?
I'm working, Vince.
No, you're vacuuming.
I'm working.
Constantly. See, I got this call
back on this jack-in-the-box
spot they're shooting
up in Chi-town.
Corey gave each of us a list
of pre-matinee duties
that we're supposed to...
Corey gave up on life
when he gained 40 pounds,
opted against using Rogaine
and decided to manage
a fuckin' movie theatre
was an acceptable career choice.
He's still our boss.
No, he's your boss.
My boss is Brando.
My boss is motherfucking Denzel.
My... my boss is that guy
who played Gandhi
in that old-ass Gandhi movie.
Corey ain't shit.
What was that?
Ha! You know, I saw you
creeping up my perphery.
You like what I was doing there?
I was like, you know,
"Corey ain't shit!",
knowing the whole time
you were coming right up on me.
That's funny!
Theatre 3 has puke
in one of the aisles,
just for you, Vince.
Yeah. Yeah, my boy,
he's all over that.
Usually, when someone
identifies you by name,
they're talking to you.
Unless you've changed
your name to Douchebag.
Lobby looks good.
Thank you.
The lobby floor is highest on
my list of pre-matinee duties,
so I always make sure to...
Jesus Christ.
- Undigested Milk Duds.
- Look at 'em.
No thank you.
Just fuckin' look at 'em!
You're seein' general human
condition bullshit
going on right in there, man!
It's just a metaphor for life,
stupid fuck!
That's Kendall.
Definitely heaven.
I've liked her since the moment
she started working here,
but she's Concessions.
I'm Tickets.
Yo, Kendall!
If only I can figure out
how to talk to her.
It's about time, Wally...
She says, cueing the music.
She says something cool, poetic.
Something cool,
poetic.
I respond with equally profound
yet effortless banter.
Words, words, words.
I love you.
You're staring.
What?
You're staring, dumbass.
I wasn't staring.
No, whatever you say,
Brokeback Rain Man.
Vince!
What?
Stop.
Hey, it's cool.
I'm... I'm all secure
in my shit.
Like, I don't want you to think
that I'm hatin' on
the goofy bitch, I just...
I'm totally into the ladies,
so I gotta be like,
"Yo, you know, keep the homo
party on that side of the...
"the lobby, 'cause
I only bang chicks."
You know what I mean?
Look, it's okay,
don't feel bad about yourself.
I got an appeal.
It's an it-factor.
I wasn't staring.
Does this normally work for you?
What?
When you talk.
Dramatic tension.
Wow.
I wasn't staring at Vince.
Umm... I'm gonna go
set up before we open.
Well, w... I wasn't staring.
I wasn't.
- Even for the most dedicated
- Cineplex employee,
there are extended
gaps of down-time.
I spend mine watching movies.
Comedy, romance, action,
whatever it is Tyler Perry
thinks he's doing.
As long as I can just watch.
No judging.
Heaven. Heaven.
What...
- Theatre 1 to your left.
- Heaven.
Theatre 2. Heaven.
Theatre 8 to your right. Hell.
Hello?
What do you want?
Good day at work?
Fine. It was fine.
I made eggs.
I'm... I'm not... I'm not...
Are you sick?
No.
Oh, Walt, you don't look good.
Did you catch something?
I'm fine.
I told you to get a flu shot.
You're working at
that movie theatre,
with all those people
with butter
and bathroom doorknob
feces on their hands.
I'll get the thermometer.
Heaven, heaven.
Listen, man, I don't
know what's wrong...
Hell.
But I need it today,
not tomorrow.
Heaven. Heaven.
Heav...
Heaven.
Heav...
Hell. Heaven.
Theatre 3 to your left. Heaven.
Theatre 2 to your right.
Polo heaven, tank-top hell.
Anybody say he'd be your
Prince Charming?
Do you think or you just
completely...
Uhh, Theatre 4 right...
uhh, to your right. Hell.
Hello?
Come on, man, I'll miss my movie.
Oh, no, no, no, no.
Where are you going, ticket guy?
Just make the judgement, kid.
This is not...
Yes or no,
up or down, heaven or hell,
I really don't care,
but I can't be here any longer.
You're not...
you're not even...
I know who you are.
This isn't...
This isn't...
Do your job.
- I can't get a reading...
- Can I get a new ticket guy?
Mine's broken.
Do... your... job.
Must be nice.
If I had a direct line like you,
I wouldn't have to do this.
Do what? Who are you?
I'm Greg.
Greg?
Yeah. Gregory Douglas Tomlinson,
if that helps with
the paperwork.
How do you...
Hmm? How do I what?
Know who I am. No one knows.
No one living, at least.
Boo.
It's a stupid joke.
It's... I just...
I've been waiting a long time
to try that out, so...
You're dead.
My lack of colour give me away?
That's why I couldn't
get a read.
So what's the plan?
How did you find me?
I'm dead, Walter.
I'm dead and I'm talking to you.
I judge the living.
You judge everyone.
Everyone living!
So I'm...
I'm stuck here like this?
I don't know! I... I don't...
Well, I can't!
Living, dead,
what's the difference?
I told you, I can't
get a read...
A read, a read, right, whatever.
Uhh, make a guess.
I honestly don't care
where you send me,
just get me outta here.
Flip a goddamn coin!
It doesn't work that way.
Why not?
Because I have to know.
Who cares?
He does.
I have to be right,
that's how it works.
And how does that happen
with normal people
who aren't, you know, dead?
I just see them and I know.
You do all this
on a fuckin' hunch?
I wouldn't expect you to
understand how I work.
There's certain... mysteries
that can't be explained.
Mysterious ways, right.
Godspeak for bullshit.
Can't feel anything.
You have any idea
what that's like?
I'm sorry, but I...
I still can't help you.
What's the harm
in trying, Walter?
I have work to do,
and anything that keeps me
from doing that work
is harmful, so please...
Go away.
Okay, I know I promised
not to talk about it...
I'm fine.
You don't look fine.
I told you we're
not talking about it.
Well, you have kind of
a plague-y look.
Plague-y?
Well, a pre-plague-y look,
but that's how it starts.
I don't have the plague.
Ohh, The plague.
As if there's only one.
Goodnight, Mom.
Okay, okay, okay.
This time I promise:
We will not talk about it.
You won't keep that promise.
How do you know?
Because you've broken it five
times since we started eating.
Well, then tell me!
Tell you what?
Whatever it is!
You're gay.
What?
Aren't you?
I'm not gay.
It's okay if you are.
But I'm not.
Well, you're something.
Something not gay!
The book said you'd say that.
And the book about
having a depressed son
said I would deny being
depressed if confronted,
and so did the one about
having an alcoholic son,
and a cutter,
and a crystal meth addict, and... Hey.
I mean, it makes the most sense.
And I want you to know that
I am totally okay with it.
Goodnight, Mom.
Walt!
I'm not sick, I'm not gay
and I'm not hungry.
Whatever's going on with you,
you have to talk about it.
If not with me,
then with somebody.
There must be good
therapists out there.
We can find one.
Walt?
Walt!
I'm not dead, Mom.
Just checking.
Karen?
Karen Benjamin?
No.
Oh, my Christ, is that you?
I haven't seen you in so...
Honey, hug!
Oh...
Oh, yeah, we're doin' it!
How are you?
I'm great.
I gotta tell you,
that office was never
the same after you left, mmm-mm.
Oh...
Really.
What have you been doing?
How's little Walter?
Oh, I guess he's not
so little anymore.
Gotta be in college
by now, right?
Yeah, college and...
girlfriend.
I mean, he's great.
We're... we're... we're great.
Oh, that's great!
Umm...
Wow!
Oh, well, you know,
we ran out of eggs.
Hey, Walter.
You want some popcorn?
I made it just for you.
Special.
With extra butter...
and bathroom doorknob feces.
Let me know how many eggs
you want for breakfast, Walt.
Wally?
Walter!
Walter.
Walter...
Don't be like that, Walter.
Go away!
That's all I'm trying
to do, buddy, go away.
Forever.
Leave me alone!
Not a chance.
Wanna snuggle?
Stop!
Stop! You have to stop!
You have...
Are you gone?
Is this destructive
ghost silence,
or "gone forever because you've
realized I can't help you"
silence?
Walt?
I'm... I'm fine!
Every... everything's fine.
I can hear you yelling in there.
You can go away now,
'cause everything's okay,
and I just need to start
getting ready now, so I...
Umm... I have
your clothes ready.
Thank you.
I'll just...
Everything's fine?
Oh, I forgot the battery.
What?
You asked me to get one
with a battery for a backup.
Right. Batteries.
It's important to be on time.
Well, everything's fine.
I need to get ready now.
I have a lot to do today, so...
Okay.
Does it help?
What?
If something's wrong with you,
if something isn't
making sense...
does it help to talk
to someone about it?
Yes.
I really need to start
getting ready now.
As soon as I'm done hugging you.
Walter Benjamin.
That's my name, yes.
That is your name.
Walter Gary Benjamin.
Ohh. You hiding bodies,
Walter Gary Benjamin?
Bodies?
You got a sort of serial killer
kind of name.
Anyone ever tell you that?
No.
Of course not, that's
a terrible thing to say!
So, what kind of crazy are you?
- I'm not crazy.
- Sure.
But since you're here,
might as well pretend
you're not completely
sane and normal
so that I can pretend
to make you less crazy.
You ever been in therapy before?
No.
Your mom said that
after your dad died,
she took you to at least
ten different therapists.
He wasn't my dad.
Who?
I didn't come here
to talk about him.
Well, who'd you come
to talk about?
Greg.
Greg.
He's a ghost.
Greg's a ghost.
Yes.
And that's who you came
to talk about?
Greg, the ghost?
Yeah.
I'm not supposed to see ghosts.
That was never...
There's a plan.
Of course there is.
But I can't really
get into that.
Greg needs to go.
Okay? He's not supposed
to be here, so...
there must be something
wrong with me, in my brain?
If you know how to fix this,
I need you to do it
as quickly as possible,
because it's starting to have
a very negative effect
on my work.
Could we go back
to Jim for a second?
I'd rather not.
Well, of course you wouldn't,
but I'm a doctor,
this is my office,
and I'm bigger than you,
so let's do it
my way for a second.
Is Jim a ghost too?
If I tell you, you have to
promise not to get angry.
Why would I get angry?
Because you're going to hell.
Tell me something I don't know.
You have the most beautiful
eyes, you should show those.
You should really show those,
they're really nice.
Thank you.
Damn, they'd look really
good for cameras...
That picks it up, and then
when you down the iris scope...
She's beautiful.
Yes, she is.
Gonna talk to her?
You don't exist
and I have work to do,
so I'd rather not have
this conversation.
Just say the word, and I'm gone.
Go!
That's not the word
I'm lookin' for.
Mine starts with an "H",
preferably two syllables,
but I'll take what I can get.
Go away!
Talk to her, and I will.
Really?
Not forever, O Chosen One.
You're not getting rid of me
'til you do your job.
But I'll give you
the afternoon off.
And all I have to do
is just... go... just...
Talk to her like
a person would, yeah.
But I don't think
you have the balls.
I've got plenty of...
balls.
Prove it.
Hi. What's going on?
Uhh, maybe if there's
some free time after
all the matinees start, I could
buy you some Junior Mints
or something. But you wouldn't
have to eat them with me,
they... they'd be a gift for you
to enjoy at your own leisure.
Umm, actually... all of us back
here kinda just...
borrow the candy that we want,
for free,
so we don't have
to pay for it. Shh.
I'm right here.
It's fine, he doesn't care.
See ya later.
"Maybe after the matinees start,
"I could buy you some
Junior Mints or something?"
That was fucking beautiful, bro.
Really, I mean it.
I'm actually... I'm... I'm a
little hard right now,
having just experienced
the joy of watching you do
your thing, man!
That was great!
My mom says that you're supposed
to treat women with respect,
and talk to them about things
that they're interested in.
And Kendall sells Junior Mints...
Oh, God, hey,
I know you're all in love with
her and shit, it's cool.
I get it. But, I should
let you know that, umm,
as your co-worker, and I like
to think as your friend, that...
I'm probably gonna
nail that at some point.
Like, really hard!
Oh yeah, she got a crazy side.
Has some sort of breakdown
or something
at that fancy-ass college
she was going to.
Yeah, plus, I heard
she ain't talked to her dad
since she tried
to go pro as a cutter.
You know what I mean?
Yeah. I kinda like that.
Unstable bitches
are the shit, bro.
You know, I don't want
to ruin, you know,
what you and I have,
'cause I like to think that
you and I have like
a Of Mice and Men thing.
You know, I'm George.
Or Lennie. Whichever one
isn't the fuckin' retard,
and I don't wanna
ruin that, you know?
So, for... for your sake,
and for our sake, really,
just try not to picture her
riding my dick.
Even though it's
totally gonna happen.
Yo, Kendall!
You pictured it. Ah, it's cool,
man. You're welcome.
I didn't picture it!
I didn't picture it.
I do.
Most people seem really worried
about being alone.
I guess I can understand
how someone can see life
as random and meaningless.
Even cruel, at times.
So it makes sense
they'd spend most,
if not all of their time,
doing their best to ensure
they don't have to go
through it by themselves.
Safety in numbers, I suppose.
Not sure I understand the rules
of this particular game,
but I'm pretty sure
we're both losing.
So, how'd it go with the girl?
Fine.
You sure about that?
Go away!
Make me.
You know I can't do anything...
We've got a big day
ahead of us, Walter.
Figure we should get going soon,
so I can get you back
in time for work.
Back?
You do have, like,
adults' clothes, right?
Back from where?
Huh? Field trip.
What?
A Son of God, I would think
a clothing allowance
would be in order.
Why are we... I'm not going
on a field trip with you.
You're not even real!
I have a therapist now.
Ohh. Yeah, you know, he's...
gonna fix this, so...
I'm not going anywhere with you,
and even if I did,
I'm not capable of sending you
to Heaven or Hell,
so you're just gonna have
to get help with your problem
from someone else.
Okay?
Huh? Sorry, didn't catch
most of that,
I was too busy suffering from
the weight of ten years
of unrealized post-death
eternity to hear you.
Care to run all
that by me again?
That's the best you got?
I can't wear that.
A church?
Stop messin' with your suit,
you look fine.
I do?
No, but we're late.
You never told me how.
How what?
You were able to find me.
Mysterious ways, I guess.
I still don't know
what we're doing here,
and I haven't been inside a
church since Jim's funeral,
and I just... I don't...
the suit's really uncomfortable!
It's making my thighs
all sweaty,
and I don't understand what...
And then we'll go
through your vows.
You've both written them
by now, yes?
We'll have them done
by tomorrow, I promise.
This is weird, we shouldn't be here.
Not yet.
"Wind Beneath My Wings",
a capella.
Look, we should leave.
Okay, alright,
and then we'll have the
presentation of the rings.
That's your cue.
And, uhh...
Mason.
...don't chew gum throughout
the ceremony...
Who's Mason?
My son.
Baby girl. Goddamn
beautiful baby girl.
You have a family?
Had. Had, yeah.
Now, to her credit,
it took her almost
a decade to re-marry.
All this time,
you've just been...
I don't stalk 'em or anything.
Anymore. I just keep tabs.
Make sure everyone's okay.
I mean, the new guy's
a little stiff.
Pretty sure he's breathin'.
So...
So what?
Where are they headed?
You... you mean...
I'm assuming that you
judge 'em one by one.
You don't have, like,
an afterlife family plan
or anything, right?
Look, this isn't, really...
So, they're gonna be okay?
I...
I mean...
She's not perfect.
But for whatever it's worth,
she doesn't deserve Hell.
And if you even think about
fucking over
either one of my kids...
I can't talk about it.
What?
Other people's judgements
is not for anyone else to know.
Come on.
I can't.
That's my fuckin' family.
Not anymore!
And you're off to start your
life as husband and wife,
happily ever after.
Sound like a game plan?
Thank you!
I'm sorry.
No, that's good.
That's good. It's... you know
you got your rules.
Certainly convenient.
Where are you going?
I'm late for work!
Nothing to worry about, kiddo.
Just some more tests.
Tests for what?
Well... come here.
They wanna know if
I'm really from Mars,
or if I'm just weird.
You should get tested too.
You're weird. Are you weird
or just a Martian, Walter?
Jim Benjamin.
Jim Benjamin.
Wish me luck.
Okay, uhh, do you know
the number?
Yeah. I just need you to sign for that,
it's the top form.
And then, uhh,
I'll be back in a bit.
Alright. Sorry!
Thank you.
Oh, man, you're making this shit
too easy on me, Rain Man.
Hey, by the way,
you're late, motherfucker.
What?
Wally!
Wally.
Hello, Kendall.
How's your day going...
so far... today?
Umm, it's... it's good.
Yes, it's, uhh,
it's good so far.
Good.
Hey, tell me to just
shut up if I'm prying,
or anything, but the
past couple days,
you've seemed a little off,
or something.
I'm fine, thank you.
Cool suit you got there.
It's too small.
And very uncomfortable
in a variety of places,
and it's making my thighs
continue to sweat even though
I'm now in a very well
air-conditioned building.
I feel weird now.
No, Wally...
Goodbye.
Well, well, well,
you are exactly...
You're late.
Which means you have to do
Vince's shit-work.
But I'm the ticket-taker/
ticket-tearer.
Sorry, Miho,
I don't make up the...
What is... what are
you wearing?
A suit.
I didn't even know
you had other clothes.
It's too small.
Yeah, a little bit.
At least pretend to be
a little rattled.
I'm a ghost, man!
You owe me that much.
I'm working.
Yeah, apparently.
You made me late.
So?
I'm never late.
Hey, I'm sorry, but...
What's the Son of God doing
working at a movie theatre?
Shouldn't you be, like,
curing lepers or something?
Miracles were phased out
over a thousand years ago.
I'm pretty sure lepers don't
go to the movies very often.
Never answered my question.
The lobby offers constant access
to new people for judgment.
Just makes sense to work here.
Bullshit!
There'd be like three times
as many people
at McDonalds or the
fuckin' DMV. Why here?
He used to take me here a lot.
Who?
Jim.
Who's Jim?
Even after he got sick.
"A nice escape from reality,"
he called it.
Walter...
So now I work here.
But instead of doing
my cineplex duties,
I'm the trash collector/
trash emptier,
which is the punishment
for being late,
which I only am because of you,
which... which I don't
even think
you've properly acknowledged.
You miss him?
- They don't miss me.
- I mean, you know.
I have to go back to work.
You know her, don't ya?
Who?
Allie.
The way you looked at her,
at the church.
I need to get back inside...
How do you know her?
Just please leave me alone.
I'm not gonna watch her walk
down that aisle, Walter.
It has to be now!
Do your job!
No!
Church? Really?
I know we talked about this.
You let Greg the ghost take you
to a house of worship?!
You did that!
Can I just explain...
Hold on, I've gotta
get another lap in
before I listen to this.
Oh, my...
Alright.
Go.
I just thought that...
It's crazy.
What?
It doesn't matter
what you're about to say
if what you're about to say is
you went to church
with a dead guy.
Who we both had agreed
was not an actual dead guy,
but the kind of dead guy
only crazy people see!
But, you don't...
Crazy!
And I will be completely
honest with you.
You're lookin' a bit off at the moment.
Off?
Not that you were ever
a picture of "on." No...
Should I leave?
Yes.
Really?
You didn't have an appointment.
You said I could come in!
Why did you come here?
Because I think that this
is an emergency.
No, no, I mean, why did you
come here initially?
I... came here to...
To?
Stop seeing the...
To stop seeing Greg the ghost,
that's why you came here.
You knew enough to know that
seeing dead people was crazy.
So why,
Walter Gary Benjamin,
are you now going on
dates with him?!
He's very persistant!
Leave.
What?
Seriously, you gotta go.
But... but... I'm trying...
Crazy.
He... you don't understand.
He seems real.
Crazy. He's got a family,
and I know they're real.
Straight-up batshit.
I'm sorry, Walter, but that's
my professional opinion;
You're beyond fixing. Goodbye.
You know Greg
ain't the problem, right?
I just came here because
I just... I just need...
I know why you think
you came here,
but that doesn't help me,
and I doubt it's doing
much for you either.
Aren't you supposed to ask me
questions about stuff?
Isn't that how this works?
It's a pretty popular
approach, yeah.
What do you think you should
be asking me about?
I got these pages and pages
of notes here,
mostly stuff about Greg.
And try as I might,
with my undeniable
talent and insight,
I can't seem to come up with a
single worthwhile question
out of any of this.
But...
There is one question
we touched on briefly
that I'm thinking might
merit a second look.
Who's Jim?
I love the movies, Dad...
Come on, Walter.
No one is coming.
And we're all gonna starve
to death if we stay up here.
What are you saying?
I'm saying that those things
are still in the house,
and if we stay up here
with no food or no water,
we're all gonna die.
First David.
Then Mersp, Centreller.
And then Teller.
There is no search and rescue.
We're gonna have to leave.
First, someone's gonna have
to go get it,
and bring it around
the other side of...
Hey, Wally.
Uhh... how'd you know
it was me?
What about me?
You're always sort of here,
aren't you?
Hopefully they'll stay
where I can see really well.
I guess I love movies.
I know. I'm sure
you do, but...
it's different
for you, isn't it?
I don't know, Taylor,
what if they...
Everything sort of is.
You know what happens if we stay up here.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry, I'm just...
The crazy thing is,
I really like this movie.
Well, then why are you crying?
These guys are gonna
be chasing you,
so you'll have
to punch the car...
I don't know.
We're all broken, Wally.
But maybe that's okay.
You got it?
I got it.
Okay, I'm going.
Please go away.
Whatcha prayin' for?
The girl?
It's the girl, right?
Askin' Daddy to pull
a few strings? I like it.
I mean, if the Son of God can't
get the girl of his dreams,
really, what chance does
true love have in this world?
Why are you doing this?
Allie will be someone else's
wife in less than an hour.
Please.
I can't help you.
What if I told you everything?
What?
Like everything.
The stuff that you normally
see when you...
look into someone's
soul or whatever.
I'll just lay it out there.
It doesn't work that way,
and even if it did,
how would I know you were
telling me the truth?
You don't even
have the instincts
to tell if a man's lying or not?
Ask me anything!
You think I'm bullshitting you
in any way,
I will leave you alone forever.
I can't really get into the logistics...
She was gonna leave me.
Why are you telling me this?
You might understand this...
unrequited pining thing
or whatever you're doing
with Popcorn Girl, but, uhh...
to actually have the girl,
to have her love you...
like, start a family together...
to know someone in such a
perfect way, like completely,
that's the best, man.
That's the best. I had that.
So you think I'm afraid of Hell?
That's Hell. Worse than Hell.
Having that, losing it.
Don't need you or God
or anyone else
to explain that to me.
So what do you say, Walter?
Walter?
Deal with me, you chicken-shit
little bitch...
How'd you die?
What am I supposed...
How did you die?
I mean...
she was my life.
I answer your question,
and you run off.
Poor form, Son of God.
Poor form. What are you doing?
We have to go.
Go where?
Another field trip.
No.
You think it started already?
What does it matter?
It's not like you're invited.
Whoa, hey, Walter!
I need to talk to her!
Whoa!
Don't do this, man!
You can't just show up
at her wedding.
Hey, hey, what's the plan here?
Excuse me.
...honourable estate.
Excuse me!
Made by God in Paradise,
into its holy...
Excuse me!
Uhh... sorry, sorry.
I'm sorry to interrupt.
Son, I'm sorry, this is
a private ceremony.
I need to talk to the...
I'm gonna have to ask you to leave right now.
My name is Walter Gary Benjamin,
I need to talk to the bride!
Really?
Wait!
It's okay, I know him.
Uhh, Allie...
Can you give us a minute?
Please?
Just trust me, I...
You yell if you need me.
I will.
I gotta say, your timing
could use some work.
Do you know why I'm here?
Do you?
You were at the rehearsal too,
weren't you?
I couldn't quite place
you then, but...
You look just like him.
Are you okay?
No.
No, I'm not.
Walter.
Walter?
Oh, this smells so good.
Well, you probably won't be able
to keep much down
once you start chemo.
I figured you should have a shot
at some real food beforehand.
Last meal, so to speak.
Don't say that.
Is it bad... that I love you?
I'm sorry, I shouldn't...
No, no, no, no.
It's okay.
Doctor Forrest, dial 118,
please.
Doctor Forrest,
please dial 1-1-8.
Mom?
Mom? Mom! Mom!
Stop it, stop it.
Stop it! Stop!
Stop!
No, stop, stop!
Walter?
Wal... hey, Walter, honey,
take a deep breath.
Are you okay? I'm calling 911.
No, Darren, he's...
This is crazy!
Walter, it's okay, honey.
No, no, no...
Okay, look, take a deep breath
and come sit down
for a moment, okay?
She is a nurse, listen to her!
Okay, Darren...
I should go.
I loved him!
If that matters.
So did I.
And it doesn't.
Hey!
Told you it was a bad idea.
Why didn't you say anything?
Look, man, I had my own shit
to figure out here.
How was I supposed
to know about...
Wait, you knew about Jim
and Allie this whole time?
Look, I think maybe we should,
uhh, calm down a bit, before...
Answer the question.
Of course I fuckin' knew.
You gonna try
and tell me you didn't?
What?
I mean, really.
How long do we keep doing this?
I didn't even know
that she existed
until you brought me
over here yourself.
We both know nothing happened
that you didn't already know.
No, no, no. Everything made
sense until you showed up.
Everything made sense
until you started
thinkin' about shit.
No, no-no, no-no.
Don't, don't.
Don't!
Hey, man, why am I still here?
Leave me alone!
If you wanted me
to leave you alone,
you would have done your job!
But maybe,
it's not really
your job, after all.
How do you know?
Come on.
Really? We're doing that?
Alright.
Leave me alone!
Okay.
You know, I did a
little cross-country
in high school.
Plus I'm dead!
So I don't have to,
you know, breathe!
You might wanna re-think the
"outrunning me" plan!
Leave me alone!
That worked out well for ya.
Get outta here.
You know, I forgave her.
Allie.
A long time ago, actually.
That's the funny thing
about bein' dead:
You don't really dwell on the
things that you'd expect to.
See, the only thing that
really sticks with you,
haunts you even,
is the overwhelming feeling
that you were alive,
you fucking existed,
and you wasted it.
Ten years is
a long time to waste.
You ready?
You tell me.
Walt?
Mom.
I heard...
I sent Jim to Hell.
What?
I sent Jim to Hell
right after he died,
and there's nothing
I can do about it now.
Are you feeling okay?
Would you like me
to make you some eggs?
I'm not hungry.
Maybe I should make up a batch,
just in case your body is so
calorie-deprived you're...
starting to feed on your organs.
I'm not hungry, Mom.
Now see, that's the thing
about the more advanced
stages of starvation...
I'm not fucking hungry!
I sent him to Hell.
Don't you want to know why?
You're not making any sense.
We never talk about it,
but you knew, didn't you?
I think you need some sleep...
He broke your heart.
That's what you need.
Walt... He broke your heart,
and I sent him to Hell for it.
Walt... You used to be different.
You used to be happy.
You weren't always like...
Like what?
Like this!
Your father was a good man!
And her husband...
that woman had a husband,
in case you didn't know that,
her husband found out,
and he killed himself, Walt...
because Jim and Allie cared
more about themselves
than they ever did
about anybody else!
Your father made a mistake!
Now, you can't
blame him for that!
Jim wasn't my father.
Will you stop it?
You stop it, right now!
He wasn't perfect!
But he loved us, and you.
He loved you more than anything!
More than Allie?
That's enough!
Do you wanna know what
broke my heart, Walt?
Really?
Because it wasn't just him
messing around with some nurse,
right after he found out
he was dying.
Yeah, that hurt.
And I let him know.
But it couldn't erase
a lifetime with him.
Not even close!
And it wasn't even him dying.
I had the strength to get us
through losing him.
And you're right,
I was different then.
I was strong, Walt!
I was strong enough
to watch him die!
But it wasn't losing him
that broke me!
It was losing you
that killed me.
Now there's eggs on the wall,
and on the floor,
if you're hungry.
Hell, hell.
Hell.
Hell.
Hell, hell, hell. Hell.
Theatre 6 down the hall
to your right. Hell.
Theatre 1, down the hall
to your left.
Hell.
Theatre 6, hell.
Hell. Hell.
You're all going to hell!
- What?
- All of you.
Okay.
You look like shit.
Forgive me for stating the
obvious, but it's so obvious
I felt personally and
professionally obligated
to say something about it.
When's the last time you slept?
I don't know.
Ate?
Eggs.
I think I had eggs.
When?
I don't... I don't remember.
Well, I won't ask about bathing,
'cause I think I know
the answer to that one.
How's Greg?
You know, your ghost friend.
I thought you didn't
wanna talk about Greg.
I don't, but you do, right?
Not anymore.
Well, that's why
we're here, right?
Your ghost problem?
I'm not crazy.
Are you sure?
I don't...
I don't know. I... I...
You're just supposed to...
What am I supposed to do?
Just stop. Just stop.
What am I doing, Walter?
You know!
You know! You...
you always know what you...
God, you know exactly what...
I can't... I can't.
I don't know. I don't know.
I don't know. I don't know.
I had control.
You can sit there,
and you can... and you can
tell me what's real,
and what's crazy,
and what's total bullshit
and you can say that
I'm just some kid who doesn't
know how to function properly
in the world, you can say all
that. Okay? Fine. Fine.
But I had control.
I woke up every day
and I went outside,
and I did something.
I did something. I never...
I never took a personal day,
I never called in sick,
I never made excuses
for why life is unfair, I...
I... figured out my place.
I see so many people
that are just...
they're just wasting
so much time,
doing nothing.
And that's crazy.
That's crazy.
They're...
Things can happen. Things can
happen. They can be bad.
They can be worse than bad.
They... they...
they can destroy you
if you let them.
If you even acknowledge them,
they can destroy you,
so I took control
and I made rules,
and I followed them
without question,
and I... and I...
I thought... I just thought...
I thought that if I did that,
then nothing...
could tear me apart,
the way... the way that
cancer did with Jim,
that life did with my mom.
Sounds crazy?
Does this sound crazy?
I know this... I know.
I know it sounds crazy,
I know it sounds crazy, I...
I probably am crazy.
I just...
I just need you to help me.
I just need you to help me.
That's what I...
I just need...
I just need you to help me.
I need help.
I'm sorry.
You know how something
really funny
just pops into your head
at like the worst times?
And the more you try
not to laugh,
the funnier... here I was,
sitting here,
hoping for something
really good,
some legit case-study
crazy shit.
And instead...
...and this is the funny part,
the joke I can't help
but laughing at...
you're not crazy.
What do you mean?
You're fine.
This is okay.
You're not crazy.
You are not crazy.
You just forgot to grieve.
Time's up.
Hey, Walter...
I don't mean to put you
on the spot or anything,
but am I still going to hell?
I don't know.
I'll see you next week.
Mom?
Mom?
How'd you sleep?
Okay.
I hate not making you anything,
but, um, I didn't
want to be late.
Late?
I, um, have an interview...
for a job.
That's great, Mom.
Yeah.
Yeah, it is.
Have a nice day at work, Walt.
Thank you.
- My name is
- Walter Gary Benjamin.
My friends call me "Wally."
My mom has always
gone with "Walt."
And my dad, whenever
I talked to him,
he'd go with "Walter."
He's dead, by the way, my dad.
But I'm not.
Oh, late again, stupid fuck.
Hey, you keep this up,
you're going to be the permanent
trash bitch around here.
Vince?
Yeah?
Fuck you.
When you're late, I can't
give Vince the shit work
and I enjoy giving
Vince the shit work.
Hey, you don't
have your vest on.
Hey.
Hey.