Welcome To Collinwood (2002) Movie Script

I'm the wrong guy! I'm the wrong guy!
I'm the wrong guy! I'm the wrong guy!
Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey.
Your mother's a whore! Man! Come on.
What's so fucking funny?
Hey, keep laughing at me
and I'll kill you.
I'm not laughing at you.
I'm laughing at life.
Life ain't funny, so quit it!
Listen to me.
I'm gonna tell you a secret.
A secret so you can laugh too.
Listen to me, you fool!
I am gonna tell you something
that will change your life.
You remember the old brick building
on Chester Avenue?
- There's a million brick buildings on...
- No! No.
The old flour factory.
With the bright gold brick.
What about it?
I'll wait for you
and think of you every night.
Listen to me, idiot.
I need a Mullinski.
I want you to go back to Collinwood.
Find someone to take the rap
for this car fiasco for me.
I'll pay 15 grand.
Fifteen grand?
Where are you gonna get 15 grand?
From a shoebox.
What shoebox?
It's under my bed.
You said we couldn't get married,
because you were broke.
You lied to me, you son of a bitch.
Of all the shit you've put me through.
If we'd used that money,
I'm stuck in here.
- You want that? You want me in jail?
- No. No.
- I want you to buy me a ring.
- All right. Listen to what I'm saying.
I heard about a job in here.
The greatest job I've ever heard of.
It'll give us all the money we could
ever use for the rest of our lives.
If I get you a Mullinski,
will you marry me?
Will you?
All right! All right! On my mother.
All right. I'll get you a Mullinski.
- Who is it?
- It's Rosalind, Toto. Open up.
Toto no here!
No Toto.
- How'd you find me?
- This is where you live?
- Well, how do you know?
- It's me, Rosalind. Cosimo's woman.
Sweet Jesus. He gave me up, didn't he?
I tried to get him out of that car.
- I swear to God!
- Relax, old man. He didn't give you up.
- He needs your help.
- How can I help?
I'm like a caged animal! All day,
cops everywhere. I don't eat or sleep.
The cops can only get you through
Cosimo, and he'd never give you up.
But you've gotta help.
He needs a Mullinski.
I can't Mullinski for him.
I already did.
- The judge would lock us both up!
- No. He needs you to find a Mullinski.
- The offer's 15 grand.
- Fifteen.
I spent a year in isolation for him,
he only gave me five.
Yeah, well, somebody told him
about a job in there.
A job? What kind of job?
Can I trust you?
He says it could be his Bellini.
- Fifteen for a Mullinski?
- Yeah.
- What's the charge?
- Grand-theft auto.
Shit, forget it. I can't do it.
What are you talking about?
Grand-theft's easy, I did it.
It's not the time. It's my mother.
She'd die on the spot.
Well, she'd die happier knowing
you had 15 grand in your pocket.
What are you, sick?
Forget it. I'm not doing it.
Look, you're gonna turn down
What do you want from me?
I told you, I can't do it.
Let Cosimo rot.
He's the biggest asshole in Collinwood.
- Look, swear you'll never repeat this.
- What?
Swear. Cosimo will kill me
if he ever finds out I told you.
- Come on. All right, I swear.
- Cosimo, he's got this big job lined up.
- Big? How big?
- Huge.
All that's huge about Cosimo
is his fat head.
- He says it's his Bellini.
- His Bellini.
Everybody in this neighborhood's
got a Bellini.
- Hey, Mickey.
- What's up?
- How's your Bellini?
- Watch your mouth.
No. Cosimo's...
Cosimo's is real.
A lifer gave it up to him
in the joint.
That's why he's so desperate
to find a Mullinski.
A lifer gave it up to him?
You see, I figure...
...if we help Cosimo get out, maybe we
can get in on some of the action.
- How much action?
- Cosimo says 300 grand.
- Holy shit.
- Yeah. I know.
I don't know.
Look. How much money did you wake up
with in your pocket this morning?
Fifty-five cents.
What have you got to lose?
- Do you know Leon?
- That Negro who hides his sister?
He's a nut case,
but he always needs dough.
I can't do it.
My sister's engaged to be married.
Jesus. This will pay for the wedding.
This is 10 grand we're talking about.
Fianc's a snob from the suburbs. If I
go to the pen, there'd be no wedding.
This is crazy. How hard can it be
to find a Mullinski?
You gotta know somebody
that could use the dough.
- Friends who'd be better off in jail.
- What the fuck does that mean?
It means what it means.
Screw Cosimo. Why give a shit?
He's the biggest asshole in Collinwood.
- Yeah, but he's got a Bellini.
- What are you doing to me?
- You wanna find a Mullinski?
- Every sucker's got a Bellini.
This one's legit.
A lifer gave it up to him.
Anybody who helps
can get a piece of the action.
- Why didn't the lifer pull it?
- Because he's a lifer.
He went to the pen before he could.
A genuine Bellini?
You swear on your mother?
I swear on my mother.
Goddamn.
You fellows know Riley?
What the fuck are you doing?
I just got the baby to sleep
after three hours.
- I'm sorry.
- It's all right.
It's all right.
It's just... He's very neurotic.
Noises...
...and bright lights upset him terribly.
I'm sorry. If you're here for pictures,
I'm out of the business.
My wife's in the pen. I had to sell my
cameras to buy diapers and baby food.
But if you're interested...
...I'm selling drinking glasses.
I paint them.
They're all hand-painted. By me.
If you're interested.
- Sweet Jesus, I am so broke.
- Funny you should mention that.
You got a job?
Cosimo needs a Mullinski.
He's willing to pay 10 large for it.
Ten large?
That's two bucks a jar.
I can't. It's impossible.
I got the kid, for chrissake.
- Where's your wife?
- Seneca.
They gave her a year for fraud.
Even with a newborn.
They set her fine at 1000 bucks.
Christ.
We're so broke, she had to do the time.
A year for 1000 bucks. I know.
You know, they've got
a fabulous nursery at Seneca.
- I was born there.
- We're in a real pickle.
We need a Mullinski.
We need one fast.
You're not gonna...
You're not gonna get an ex-con
for grand-theft auto.
You need somebody with a clean record
so the judge'll go easy on him.
Jesus, it's not like
the old days anymore.
You guys know Pero?
Baby coming through.
Baby coming through.
Baby coming through.
Baby-fucking-coming through.
Here, let's put this on you.
- Are you out of your lunatic mind?
- What?
- Cosimo won't share his job with them.
- It was an accident.
- I was talking, my mouth slipped.
- He's gonna kill me for this.
He's gonna kill me.
- I'm not going to prison for that fool.
- Not even for 15 grand?
- You told us 10.
- My boxing career's about to take off.
- You're fighting a priest.
- A tough priest.
You rather I fight a woman?
Tonight, I fight a priest.
Tomorrow, I fight
for the championship.
- This jackass is our last chance.
- Maybe sweeten the deal.
He's this close. I say we go
equal parts on another 1000.
A thousand dollars
would get my wife out.
What is it with you guys?
You gotta spend money to make money.
Man, she's right. If we don't
spring Cosimo, there's no job.
We'll go 16,000 on the deal.
I don't need it. When my career takes
off, I'm spinning on this neighborhood.
- Mahlovic, you're up! Let's go.
- All right.
See you after the fight.
Pero, buma- ye!
I'm so pretty. I'm so pretty. Come on!
Cosimo Cosanawowski, for attempted
grand-theft auto, you are sentenced to...
- Stop the proceedings! Stop!
- Order. Order.
- Hold on! Hear me out. Hear me out.
- Remove him.
Please, Your Honor, I'm here to confess.
That man is innocent.
Your Honor, I can no longer live
with the guilt.
It was me who was stealing that car.
I confess.
My brother Cosimo, Saint Cosimo,
as he's known on the streets...
...was only trying to stop me.
I told him:
"Cosimo, I mean to steal this car.
I am a car thief.
I steal cars. By myself."
I'm gonna kill you!
- Wait. Hold on.
- You're the worst Mullinski ever.
Not only that, you added six months.
Six months to my sentence.
Six months. Six months.
Who cares about six months?
I just got three fucking years, man!
I want my money back. Otherwise,
you're gonna die in this prison.
- Get out.
- Fine. I don't care.
I don't care about anything anymore.
What's the matter with you?
Come on. Prison is easy, you puss.
No. You don't understand.
I betrayed my brother.
Maybe he deserved it.
He's dying, you jackass!
My real brother, Bleeko, is dying.
Now he'll have to die alone.
Just last week he said to me...
He said, " Pero, be there for me
in the final moments...
...when death has me in its deadly grip.
Don't let me go it alone."
I swore to him I wouldn't,
but I betrayed him.
For a lousy 16 grand.
- You're a sick bastard.
- No, I'm not laughing at you.
I'm laughing at... You wanna hear
something gonna cheer you up?
You know that old building
on Chester Avenue?
- There's a million old buildings.
- The factory with the gold brick.
- What about it?
- It's not a flour factory anymore.
Half became apartments.
Guess what's on the other half?
I don't care.
- A jewelry shylock.
- So what?
So my cellmate, the bricklayer,
he split the building.
- He pulled a Krazner.
- What?
You know, a Krazner.
He mortared the wall between
the apartment and the shylock...
...with sand and water.
You can push through it.
Shylock's a big shot. The bricklayer
said he has a fortune in that safe.
You still have to break
into the apartment.
That's the beauty of it. Nobody lives
there. It's vacant. You can walk in.
You're a bigger jackass
than everyone says.
- What are you talking about?
- lf this job is so good...
...why didn't the old man
pull it himself.
Two days before the job,
he fights with his wife.
Shoots her dead. He's a lifer now,
so he gave me the job.
You were to spring me so I could
pull it. Now we're in the can together.
- Funny shit, huh?
- Yeah, it is.
- I mean, really funny, right?
- You have no idea.
- You're free to go.
- Thanks.
Where's he going?
You told me you had three years.
You know, I did,
but the judge suspended the sentence.
I'm gonna fucking kill you! You son
of a bitch. Your mother's a whore.
- My mother's a what?
- A whore! Your mother's a whore!
- Goddamn! Shit. Come to see me home?
- I want the money back.
I did my job, baby. It's not
my fault the judge didn't buy it.
- I'm dead if I don't get that money.
- Look who flew the coop.
If it isn't a $ 16,000 man.
We don't care what went wrong. We just
want our stake in the money back.
What's the fuck's the matter
with you people?
- That money's mine.
- We don't want trouble.
- You want me to take it out of your ass?
- Fuck you!
You want more, funny boy?
- Christ.
- Where's the money?
- I don't have it.
- Well, you better find it.
- Jesus Christ!
- Just give us the money.
I gave the money to my debtors.
- All 16,000?
- I still owe another 5 to Leo the Lip.
- He's lying.
- Wait, wait. I got the Bellini.
- I got Cosimo's Bellini.
- Bullshit. Stick him again.
I swear to God! I told him I got
three years, and he gave it up to me.
- So what?
- So I'll cut you in on it.
Equal shares. All of you.
It's the greatest job I ever heard of.
A jewelry shylock.
Let's hear it then.
- I can't breathe.
- Let him up. Let him up.
You watch yourself, fucker.
Fuck.
- I feel weak.
- Shit.
Jesus, we killed him.
The safe's on the second floor
of the pawnshop.
The apartment next
to the pawnshop is empty.
We break into the apartment,
smash a hole in the wall...
...climb into the shylock's
and crack the safe.
That's the easy part.
Trouble is that building's like
a fortress. The front door's alarmed.
The best way is through
the coal chute next door.
Take the back fire escape to the roof.
Then we drop to the apartment window,
and we cut it open.
Anybody know a safecracker?
- Jerzy Antwerp is the only one I know.
- Wait a minute. Hold him, would you?
I got an idea.
I was thinking, with a camera, I could
shoot the shylock opening the safe.
- We could get the combination.
- Brilliant.
Where we gonna get a camera?
We could pay a little visit
to a guy I know at the flea market.
So, what are you hocking today, Riley?
Your kid?
Treat me with more respect.
It just so happens I came
into some money. I'm a buyer today.
- It's nice. I like the browns.
- Yes, but what about the reds?
What do you think? It's for my sister.
Is there too much red?
She's been institutionalized, and the
color red makes her bark like a dog.
Yes, after all, I believe
there is too much red.
I'm sorry, Oswald,
but your paintings are crap.
Let's go to Sears.
Okay. Here we go.
- What is this?
- Sorry.
I shot some footage of him
for his mom.
He's a cute baby.
That's his new food.
He's not taking to it too well.
- I like it.
- Riley, come on.
- It's good food.
- You're killing me.
Here we go.
- The Hassenfeffer 622.
- Is that good or bad?
Neither.
Okay, okay, watch this.
- Seventy-eight.
- Seventy-seven.
- Eight.
- Seventy-eight. Eight.
- Whoa.
- Jesus Christ.
- Seventy-seven.
- What's that number?
Seventy-eight.
- What is the number?
- It's an eight. Seventy-eight, eight.
- That's great.
- We did nine takes.
Every time, on the last number,
he does this.
He's like a gimp.
Sorry.
So, what do you think?
Well, as a film, it's a disaster.
It's a documentary.
It's supposed to look like that.
The good news is,
the safe is crackable.
So how do we...? What do we...?
How do we do this?
Do I carry you on my back?
This may be a shock, but I don't
go out in the field anymore.
- See. What the hell's he doing here?
- I teach.
For 500 bucks,
I show you how to do it.
- 500 bucks?
- 500 bucks?
Be quiet. The baby.
We're all tapped out here. That's why
we're doing this job in the first place.
- We'll cut you in.
- I don't take back-end money.
- There's a fortune in that safe.
- Five hundred bucks, that's a deal.
- My time is valuable.
- All right. Hold on.
Hold your horses.
Can you get us through a Krazner wall?
Well, who do you think Krazner called?
- All right. So then it's a deal.
- Good.
Be at my place Saturday afternoon.
If you'll excuse me,
I have a class to teach in Youngstown.
Five hundred bucks? Did I mention I'm
trying to get my wife out of the clink?
- Where can we get that kind of money?
- We could mug someone.
There's gotta be something.
I think I can get the money.
- How much do you need?
- Just a small loan for a new suit.
I met a nice girl.
I'm gonna ask her to marry me.
You're getting married?
- lf she says yes.
- So how much?
Five hundred dollars.
Five hundred dollars?
It must be some suit.
It's beautiful.
With buttons and shoes.
Well, I hope she can make
an honest man out of you.
At the usual interest?
- At the usual interest.
- We're still better than Leo the Lip.
There are many methods
to cracking a safe.
Each method has an inverse relationship
between quickness and cleanness.
The quickest is Lipchiski Method, named
for its originator, Theodore Lipchiski.
The Lipchiski Method requires a stick
of dynamite and a match. Very quick.
But as we learned when Lipchiski blew
himself up in Toledo, it's not clean.
Hence, I teach the circular-saw method.
Not the quickest, but the cleanest.
You and your loot will emerge unharmed.
This is the method that I was taught.
It is what I believe in.
- You want Lipchiski, go somewhere else.
- The police are here! They're coming!
They were just here. Hide the safe.
- Where?
- Hide the fucking safe. Throw it off.
- We can't move it.
- The cops are here.
You think that's funny?
You son of a bitch.
You little son of a bitch.
Fucking midget.
I'm gonna come out of this chair.
I'm gonna fuck you up.
I hate that fucking kid.
Where was I?
- Circular...
- Circular saw. Circular-saw method.
You take the saw like so:
You apply it like so:
You crank it like so:
In three hours, you got your hole.
- What time is it?
- Two.
- We'll now begin a full demonstration.
- The police are here!
Baby! Sgt. Babitch is here.
He's coming around the back.
- He'll bury us. Hide the fucking safe!
- What? Where?
All right, guys. Take five.
That's good.
Babitch! What a surprise.
You caught us on laundry day.
You sing while you launder?
- Speak English.
- We're a chorus for the church.
- Which church is that?
- It's the...
We tour.
Would you know anything
about a job in Youngstown?
A safe with a hole
about the size of your head.
Where's Youngstown?
Now, wait a minute here.
I know all you guys.
You're all from Collinwood.
And you're all bums.
You're Pero Mahlovic, aren't you?
I knew your brother.
He was a shitty fighter,
which is more than I can say for you.
- What's your angle here, Mahlovic?
- I'm the tenor.
You're a joker, huh?
Well, you keep laughing, champ.
All the way to the pen.
If a job goes down in the next few
weeks, I'll know whose asses to string.
Jesus.
You better watch your back, boys.
Where have you been?
My kid's starving.
- The bus never came. I had to walk.
- Down you go. Good boy.
Give me a square,
and I'll forget about it.
The shylock comes at 6.
He opens up at 7.
Good luck.
Hey, give me a light.
Jesus, she's a live one.
Yeah.
What the fuck is this, man?
- Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!
- What the fuck is this?
My best friend's cousin told me
the old ladies are the shylock's aunts.
They're getting senile.
So he moved them in next door
to keep an eye on them.
- The girl's their maid.
- The maid, huh?
Well, don't worry.
I once seduced the first lady.
You sure this isn't gonna
make you jealous or anything?
You're a piece of work.
As hard as you find it to believe,
I think you're a pig.
- Shit.
- You're a real pizda. You know that?
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
- Baby, where you going in such a hurry?
- Your mama teach you how to walk?
Whoa, slow down, sugar.
Give a little love to a black man.
Whoa, whoa.
Look at that. Baby got an ass
like bubble-gum ice cream.
The kind we like to lick.
Why don't you leave the girl alone,
you street bums.
Scram, before we lay one on you.
- I'll carve you like a turkey, honky.
- Put the knife away.
Hit me.
Put the knife...
- Don't hit me no more.
- Hurry up. Go get her.
- Are you okay?
- Go get her.
Miss! Miss, I don't mean any harm.
Miss. Are you all right, miss?
That was quite an experience.
Every day, I say to myself:
" Pero, you're a lucky man. Your father
could afford a private school...
...where among gaining a degree in
learning, you also mastered boxing."
- That was quite a punch you threw.
- It was just a couple of bums.
- I wanted to make sure you're okay.
- I'm fine. Now excuse me, I'm late.
You're late? That's funny. So am I.
Which direction are you going?
- This way.
- That's funny. So am I.
- What are you late for?
- I'm meeting my boyfriend.
- He's a doctor.
- A doctor. Really? What do you do?
Me? I don't work.
I shop. I play tennis.
Oh, really? Well, I'm a salesman.
Congratulations. What do you sell?
All sorts of things.
Big things. Expensive.
- You from around here?
- No, Collinwood.
Even though I could afford more,
I live humbly. I like humble people.
For instance, if you were, say,
I don't know, a maid and not an heiress...
...I'd still think you were
just as pretty.
Hey, what's happening, young blood?
Crazy kids.
That's a joke we play on each other.
So where do you live?
I live in an apartment with my aunts,
but my boyfriend's building me a house.
- The doctor?
- No, the other boyfriend.
You have another boyfriend?
Yeah, I have lots of boyfriends.
I think it's best that way.
- So you going to ask me out, or what?
- I thought...
What about your boyfriends?
They understand I'm a liberated woman.
How's Sunday?
- Sure.
- All right.
- We'll meet at your house?
- Yeah, we can't. It's being...
...deloused.
- There's a street carnival.
- Yeah.
- On St. Clair.
- Okay, yeah, 4:00, then.
- In front of the church.
- In front of the church.
Okay.
Okay.
- Okay.
- Bye.
I'm gonna kill that son of a bitch.
I'm gonna kill that son of a bitch.
I'm gonna kill that son of a bitch.
I'm gonna kill that...
Hey, I don't want to miss my bus now.
- Thank you.
- Thanks.
Look, a fun house!
I love fun houses.
Hey, if it's fun you want,
it's fun you get.
Where did you go?
Which one is you? Where are you?
Guess you'll just have
to kiss me and find out.
Come here.
Come here.
Where you going?
- I'm gonna kill you, you son of a bitch!
- Cosimo! What the...?
Want something, baby?
- Jesus Christ, where's Mahlovic?
- Why?
- Didn't you hear?
- What?
- Cosimo broke out of the joint!
- There goes Cosimo!
- I'll kill you! Your mother's a whore!
- He's got a gun!
You sick bastard!
- You stole my Bellini!
- Wait, wait!
You puta! I'll spit on you!
- I'll spit on all of you!
- Baby, please. Relax.
I got it all planned out.
We can all share.
You traitorous whore!
Listen to me,
and listen to me good, okay?
This job is mine! Anybody tries
to take it, I'm gonna kill them.
I'm gonna kill anybody!
Anybody!
You okay?
- He get you good?
- No.
Just get away from me.
Fuck him.
Leon.
Leon, stakeout. Let's go.
- What do you want?
- I'm looking for Leon.
- Leon ain't here.
- I'm sorry. I didn't know.
I'll let him know you came by.
Shit. I'm Basil.
- What?
- Tell him Basil came by.
I will.
And you?
Are...?
Right. I'm Michelle.
Leon's sister.
- I'm Basil.
- I know. You said it, like, three times.
That's a pretty ring.
It's from my fianc.
He's a salesman from the suburbs.
So...
...Basil...
...you wanna come in?
This place is kind of stale,
don't you think?
Maybe we could, you know,
go to your place or something.
- But my aunts will be there, so...
- So we'll stay in the living room.
- No, I can't leave, really.
- Why not?
- Because.
- Because what?
- I told another date to meet me here.
- Another date?!
I cannot be dating just one guy.
It'd be like I'm married or something.
Dear God, woman!
All these other loves in your life.
It's enough to make
a man feel impotent.
If you ask me,
you should only be dating me.
I'll date whoever I please.
- Hello, Beddo.
- Hi, Carmela.
- Hi. This is my date.
- lf you don't mind.
This is your date?
What is this, a joke?
Excuse us, please.
Another polka heading your way.
Here we go with something called
" My Little Darling."
I'm starting to think
we should just forget this job.
It's spinning out of control.
This job's not spinning
out of control. You are.
Try getting into her apartment,
not her pants.
I've been trying to get in
that apartment for two weeks.
- She's a tease. I don't understand her.
- You're falling in love with her.
- I don't fall in love, sweetheart.
- Oh, please.
It's all over your face.
Motherfucker.
- Hands off, midget.
- What did you say?
- She's with me tonight.
- Really?
- Yeah, really.
- Well, he's with me.
Who is he, your pimp?
Come on, come on.
Come on. Want some, tough guy?
What the fuck are you doing?
How could you lose your head over
this hussy? She's a maid, for chrissake!
Wait, Carmela. Carmela.
Carmela, wait a second!
I'm sorry for the disturbance.
But I was enjoying an evening
with my girlfriend...
...when that mob attacked me.
- Get out of here.
Pero Mahlovic. 122 Ivanhoe.
- Sgt. Babitch, thank God you're here...
- Shut up.
The way you're going,
I should have them reserve you a cell.
You're such a kidder, Sgt. Babitch.
This is a very dangerous area.
Don't get smart with me,
you little prick.
- I will shit in you.
- Yeah. Yeah, I know. I know.
I'll be seeing you around, champ.
Okay, then.
Maybe at the mixer next week?
So that was very noble of you,
what you did tonight, you know.
No one's ever fought
over me that much.
Well, I can't help it.
I guess I feel compelled.
Why did that girl say
those things about me?
You know, she was jealous.
Yeah.
She was telling the truth.
I'm really just a maid.
I thought because you were
a big salesman and everything...
...you wouldn't like me as much, so...
Please. We live in a democracy.
I don't care you're a maid.
You can be anything you want.
I know. I just...
I don't know. I was just being silly.
I'm a silly liar.
You're not silly.
You're not silly.
- You know those old ladies I work for?
- Yeah.
They're going out of town on Tuesday.
And I live over on the West Side,
and I was thinking you could...
...come over for a nice,
romantic dinner.
I'd like that. I'd like that a lot.
What did you say?
- That I'm off on Tuesday night and I...
- No, no, no. The old ladies.
They're going to see
their mother in Steubenville.
- You could come to my place.
- I could.
Except, I have a date.
- You have a date?
- With my brothers.
We bowl. In a bowling league.
I like to bowl. Could I come?
It's a men's league.
Yeah.
But we could go out another night.
This weekend.
- One more beer!
- Give me the money and get out!
- Get the fuck out!
- Your mother's a whore!
Carmela. Look at me.
Look at me for a second.
I like you.
I like you a lot.
I like you too.
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
No!
- No! Help! Help me!
- Give me the purse!
Somebody help me!
What a shitty way to go, huh?
Snatching a purse like a street punk.
- Something ain't right in the world.
- He had a tough life.
His mother was a whore.
Sorry, I can't go in.
Death scares him.
Excuse me, gentlemen. It's time.
We ain't done nothing to Cosimo
that he ain't done to somebody else.
- Still don't make it right, I guess.
- He was a good friend to me.
What are you talking about?
He was an asshole.
He'd screw his mother
and not think twice.
Watch your mouth.
It's not about him anyway.
Okay?
It's about the job.
We worked hard for this thing.
This is our dream
we've been building here.
What's your son gonna eat?
Your guilt?
Who'll pay for that wedding reception?
The memory of Cosimo?
You're the poorest man I ever seen.
Did Cosimo ever help you out?
And you. Are you gonna stay
a bum all your life?
This is about the job, plain and simple.
We all need it to survive.
And there ain't a goddamn thing
we can do to change that.
How you doing?
It's Antwerp.
The tools are ready for tonight.
They're in a duffle bag in a dumpster
in the back of your building. Got it?
Why are you dressed like a priest?
You're an idiot.
You see that?
Babitch smells blood.
Good luck.
- He's putting the screws on us.
- Don't worry.
We pull this job,
we'll all end up in the slammer.
Don't worry about Babitch.
I'll take care of Babitch.
My place, 8:00.
We need this.
We need this.
What the fuck is this?
It's almost $ 16,000.
If something should happen
to go down tonight...
...I'm hoping you'll forget...
...you ever saw us.
Stupid bastard.
What the fuck are you doing?
Give me one good reason
not to bury your...!
Give me one good reason.
Babitch.
What do you make?
What are you making, 30,000 a year?
You live in a one-bathroom house, man.
You got four kids.
You drive a Chevette. Your wife
rides the bus to work. For what?
Just so you can protect some money
in some rich guy's safe?
For what?
Look at me.
Nobody gets hurt.
They won't get hurt.
Now get off my porch.
You know, you should get going.
Leon will be here any second.
I don't know. I was thinking, maybe it's
time we tell your brother about us.
Tell him what?
About us.
- That we're in love.
- You crazy?
You think I'm gonna leave
my fianc for you? Come on.
- But we're in love.
- But he has a good job.
He can get me out
of this neighborhood.
- I can get you out of here.
- And take me where? To jail?
What do you want, then?
Your rich man?
Is that what you want?
- Is that gonna make you happy?
- Yeah.
No.
I don't know.
Well, what do you want?
I want an honest man.
You all right?
I'm fine.
- You want a drink?
- No. Thank you.
What do you want?
I need a favor. Only you can help me.
Will you watch him for me tonight?
I don't want anything
to do with this anymore.
I know you don't, but I don't
have a choice. I need the money.
For him.
I'm not good with children.
Listen to me.
I need your help.
I think you're a good person, Rosalind.
You're one of the nicest people I know.
And he needs that.
And I think maybe...
...you need that too.
He's so tiny.
Please.
All right, but just for tonight.
I put his things in that box.
If he cries, whistle.
Just whistle to him. He...
Don't worry. You'll see him tomorrow.
If they don't get here in five minutes,
we go without them.
- I'm sorry. Sorry, I'm late.
- What's this? We don't need this.
- It's not a prop. I was beaten.
- Beaten?
By the cops?
No. Oswald.
The guy we stole the camera from.
I ran into him and his brother.
They broke my arm.
- For stealing a camera?
- It was a good camera.
This is a disaster. What are those?
Hydrocodone...
...bitar... Bitartrate.
They're bullshit! I've taken bunches,
and they don't do shit.
You took bunches of these?
What's wrong with you?
You wanna go into a coma?
Are you telling me
I don't love my own son?
- He's out. Get him out of here.
- No, we can't do the job without him.
- He's useless! Look at him!
- I'll take him home.
What? We've gotta leave for the job.
I've been meaning
to tell you something.
You're not cutting me out!
You or any of you.
I'm clean enough to go to the cops.
I'm clean enough to go on this job,
aren't I? Aren't I?
- You wouldn't. You wouldn't dare.
- You try me.
Jesus.
- Where the fuck hell is Leon?!
- I'll cut you, boy. I'll cut you good!
Wait! You don't understand.
She was a beautiful flower,
and you plucked her.
- I'll make you bleed.
- Listen to me. I love her.
- No. No. No.
- We wanna get married.
She's already engaged!
And not to a goddamned dirty thief!
I'm not a thief anymore. I quit.
I'm done with all this.
- What did you say?
- That's what I wanted to tell you.
I'm not going tonight.
- I'm in love with Michelle.
- Shit!
I wanna marry her.
I have to be an honest man to do that.
So I got a job.
Jesus-fucking-Christ.
This is a fucking fiasco.
If you still wanna kill me, I'll be
at the nickel factory on St. Clair.
I start tonight.
This Bellini is starting to look
like a real fucking Kapuchnick.
Watch your mouth!
Are you insane?
You trying to jinx us?
- Where are you going?
- To do the job.
Can we do the job
with only four of us?
At this point,
I don't give a good goddamn.
Wait a minute, here.
Let's calm down
and get our minds right.
Minds right? You're standing there
with a fucking butcher's knife.
Hi.
- The girl, she's here! Out the window.
- Who?
- The chick, the maid. Out the window!
- Oh, my God!
- I'm not going out there.
- It's the only way. Go.
There's no place to go
once you get out except down!
Oh, my God!
- Carmela.
- Pero?
What a surprise.
How did you find...?
How did you know where to find me?
- Is this your place?
- No, this is much too modest for me.
This is my brother's place.
My brother Mico.
He's an artist. He likes the squalor.
- Hi, Mico. I'm Carmela.
- Hello, young woman.
I'd shake your hands,
but I'm inspecting these bottles.
What's the matter?
I'm afraid of...
I'm afraid of heights.
I wanted to tell you something.
I quit the old ladies tonight. Yeah.
- You'll find another job.
- You would've been so proud of me.
I never told you this before,
but they were really terrible to me.
The things they would make me do.
They're incontinent, for God's sakes.
But then I met you, and you made me
feel like I was worth something.
I thought, " I have Pero. I don't have
to take this crap no more."
So I called them "spoiled babies,"
and they fired me.
They were so upset by it...
...they canceled their stupid trip
to Steubenville tonight.
What? What?
Yeah, but then they went anyway
because they're stubborn old bats.
And I kept the keys.
We should go back and wreck the place.
My, my, my.
She didn't turn the keys in.
Yeah, I heard her, Mico.
You know what? You're very upset.
Maybe I should take you home.
I don't wanna interrupt your bowling.
Won't you miss Pero at bowling?
My arm's broken. I'm not going
to a fucking bowling match!
Poor Mico.
He's so upset because he can't bowl.
The window seems to be okay.
If you have any more problems,
just give us a call. Hello.
Okay.
Am I dead?
There you go.
So where's the next window?
Next stop, 25th Street. Ohio City.
I like your brother Mico.
He's a little strange though.
He had...
...syphilis as a baby.
Yeah.
You know what?
Now that I think about it, I wish
I didn't have those keys on me.
If anything were to happen
while they were away...
...those old crows,
they would blame me.
How could they blame you?
You're a small girl. That's nonsense.
- Could you do me a huge favor?
- Sure.
Could you take the keys
on your way home...
...and drop them off with the janitor?
I would just sleep so much better.
But how could they blame you?
You're a small girl. That's...
Oh, no. Pero, they're not here.
Oh, my God.
I think I left them in the front door.
Oh, my God!
Someone will rip that place off.
We gotta go back.
- Driver!
- Wait. Wait. Wait.
Hold on a second.
Let me take a look.
- No, they're not in there.
- Look, there they are.
- Thank you. They would have killed me.
- No wonder you couldn't find them.
Look at all this lipstick.
One for every boyfriend?
No.
Well, there's only one from now on.
Don't worry. You sleep good tonight.
And I'll take the keys back. Okay?
- Yeah.
- All right.
You're always so good to me.
No, you are. You're the best.
- Where the fuck have you been?
- Did you get the keys?
I couldn't get near them.
We gotta go in the old way.
- But we're two hours behind.
- So let's move, then. Let's go.
Motherfucker!
Don't come down! Don't...
- I can't swim!
- Goddamn!
- I can't swim!
- Come on.
Goddamn toothless...
- Put your goddamn pants on.
- I'll catch pneumonia.
Come on, let's go.
Quit messing around. Let's go.
You ready?
- Can you get it?
- No. Not yet.
- Higher.
- Wait.
Just a few more inches.
One, two...
I got it.
- I think he bit off his tongue.
- No.
No, it's right there.
You want one of these?
All right, we're losing time.
Let's go. Come on!
Shit!
Hot!
Shit! Hot!
Seems sturdy.
I don't know.
We should test it.
Test it?
- Chill, Riley! Chill!
- Go on. Go on.
- Okay. Go.
- I can't.
What? What do you mean, you can't?
He's afraid of heights.
You have to.
I can't.
Stop moving around, Toto. Stop it.
Get your hands off my face!
Stop moving around
like a fucking monkey.
I'm scared.
Get him off me! Get him off me!
Oh, my God! Whatever about my ass
being all over his lap.
You cause enough embarrassment
to last a year.
When we went to your mother's...
- My shorts are coming down.
- Shut up.
And who came in? Your cousin,
Clarence. You were making eyes at him!
That's so sick.
It's your own cousin!
- What about Eddie?
- I'm going back inside.
- lf you cause a scene, I'm leaving.
- We should stay out here all night!
- Screw you!
- Where are you going? Come back.
Get him off me! Get him off me!
Go. Go.
Next time I say to keep your pants on,
keep them on!
It's this one.
- It's this one. It's this one.
- Get the thingy.
Come on.
Oh, jeez. This place is like a palace.
All right. It wasn't that heavy.
Stop being so goddamn dramatic.
This is it. Guys, come on.
Come here. Hurry up.
We can drill a pilot hole right there.
This is it.
- Fuck!
- Shit!
Put this in.
Plug it up. Plug it up.
- What a bizarre wall.
- You hit the plumbing, asshole.
Oh, shit. Oh, shit. Oh, shit.
Ms. Wiener, I'm in the apartment now,
and everything looks fine.
Wait. There's some water
on the floor or something.
Goddamn! Oh, fuck!
No, it's the cat, Ms. Wiener.
No, the cat peed on the floor again.
No, I will not. No, I'm the janitor.
I'm not your maid.
What's that? Yeah, a very nice
young man returned the keys...
...for the girl
about three hours ago. Yeah.
Yeah, okay.
I'll leave them right here. Good.
Yeah, I'll lock up.
Yeah, okay. Bye, Ms. Wiener.
Bitch.
Goddamn fucking cat.
I can't believe this shit.
Crazy fucking people.
Okay, okay...
- You miserable son of a bitch.
- I had to return them for an alibi.
- lf I kept them, she could finger me.
- You sold us out for a woman?
They would've had her arrested
if the joint got robbed.
So we had to crawl in like "aminals"?
We wasted half the night.
Look. What's done is done.
And all the arguing in the world
is not gonna change it.
Now let's just shut up
and get out the Antwerp.
Come on. Come on. It's giving.
It's been giving
for the last 40 minutes.
I need a breather, man.
So how much do you
really think is in that safe?
Well...
...Cosimo said that the old man swore
to him that it was at least 300 grand.
Goddamn. That's a lot of money.
A person could live several lives
with that kind of money.
I'm gonna buy a big loft
with my share of the loot.
And one for my boy.
I'll pay them off so he never has
to work a day in his life.
I'm gonna move to the country.
Houses there are so far apart
you can sit on your porch...
...and read the newspaper
in your underwear.
I'm gonna buy my wife
a new gravestone.
You know, one that stands up.
With little angels carved. In marble.
So, what are you gonna do?
I think I'm gonna build a gym.
I know everybody thinks
I'm not much of a fighter...
...but I think I'd be a good teacher,
you know, for the kids.
Man, I can't wait another minute.
Come on, guys,
let's go get the goddamn loot.
Toto, get us some water.
It's like a jungle in here.
All right, come on.
Something's happening.
It's giving.
Shit. Here it comes.
Here it comes.
Yes! Yes. Yes.
Good, sweet Jesus.
How did you get in there?
I'm getting the water.
My God.
It's the kitchen.
- The kitchen?
- What are you saying?
It's the kitchen!
Cosimo said the wall was in the
living room. This is the living room.
How can this be the living room
if that's the fucking kitchen?!
What do you think,
it's in the fucking closet?
- Shit.
- You moron.
You unbelievable idiot moron.
How was I supposed to know
they had two living rooms?
- Who has two living rooms?
- You should've looked.
You should've looked
while we were busting our asses.
- I got the water!
- Unbelievable hack.
You poser. You've killed us.
- Me?
- Yes, you. You've killed us.
What are you talking about? We move
the crank in here and do it again.
It's 3 a.m. We'd never get
through the wall and crack the safe.
- We could drill fast.
- It's impossible!
We'd drill our way
into the joint. It's over.
We can still do it.
We can still do it.
I'm telling you.
- Leon, help me.
- We'll never make it, man.
Hey, Toto. Come on.
God, I needed that money.
I needed it so bad. You've ruined us.
What are you talking about?
I did everything. From the start.
I got the Bellini. I planned the job.
I wooed the girl. I paid off Babitch.
I did everything. I gave everything
I had for this! Everything!
You know what we did? We believed.
You gave us hope
with your fucking Bellini.
And then you ripped our hearts out,
and you smashed them.
What is that? What?
Christ, I'm more broke now than
when I started this fucking thing!
I wish I'd never met you.
Any of you!
Jesus, I think I'm gonna be sick.
I'm sorry.
I got a kid, for chrissake.
What am I gonna do?
Sweet Jesus.
Hey, guys, take a look at this.
It's a cookie-jar stash.
There must be 1000 bucks here.
Not a bad consolation prize, huh?
Let me see that.
It's delicious.
The girl must have made it
before they fired her.
I'm gonna heat this up.
At least we'll eat good before we go.
The pilot light must be out.
Got a match?
Wait a minute. Does anybody smell...?
I think it's probably a good idea
if we don't see each other anymore.
Wait a second.
I gotta give you your cut of the take.
It's for your wife. Get her home.
Thanks.
What are you gonna do?
It just wasn't our night.
I better get home
and apologize to my sister.
Be well, old man.
If you get any more Bellinis...
...just give me a call.
So...
...where are you going?
I don't know.
Get cleaned up,
and maybe I'll go see Carmela.
That's a good idea.
She's a nice girl.
Yeah.
I'll see...
Hey, this safe...
...this job, it's nothing.
It's just money.
Money comes, money goes.
I'm an old man, I know.
But to have someone...
...somebody to walk with...
...at your side...
...is everything.
She's a nice girl.
Yeah. Yeah, she is.