Bang Baaja Baaraat (2015) s01e01 Episode Script

1 'Sanskrit chants.
' The bride and groom please stand up for the nuptial rounds.
The bride and groom please stand up for the nuptial rounds.
'Sanskrit chants.
' Fuck you.
- Fuck you.
Punnu.
Did he go to the loo? Bang Baaja Baaraat Season 01 | Episode 01 Ori Promise me You will always brush your teeth before sleeping.
Promise me you will always be honest with me.
you will never ask how the tea is.
Promise me Promise meyou will stop snoring in your sleep.
I don't do that.
Do I? Sometimes.
Fineyou can eat the way you want.
But promise me we're going to have a great time at our wedding.
Promise.
Our parents are going to meet each other for the first time today.
We'll be meeting them for the first time too.
We have to be on the same page.
Yes! It's us against them.
Mom.
Hellomom! You've arrived.
I'm almost there, get yourself coolie SeeI'm waving to you from platform no.
8.
Hello, aunty.
Hello, uncle.
- Bless you.
Hello.
- Bless you, dear.
Hello, aunty.
Let me introduce everyone.
This is my father, Mr.
Ranjeet.
Hello.
- Hello.
This is my mother, Mrs.
Sushmita.
- Hello.
And this is Pawan's father, Mr.
Murli Prasad.
- Hello.
And Pawan's mother, Roli.
Aunty, is Roli your petname or is there something more.
You see, dearwe I can't do this.
- Listen I told you we shouldn't go.
I had no intentions of coming here, but you didn't listen.
I only came here to give her our ancestral jewellery.
Son, get some water.
Get some water for your mother.
I just came to give you these bangles.
- Have water.
You see she's tired, it was a long journey.
- Here have water.
It's cow-peefor the veneration.
Cursesdisgusting! SorrySorry.
Sir, I think it's gone.
Not gone, Go.
This is not the way.
You don't invite your parents for your wedding like the other guests.
We're not your enemies.
All the relatives have been asking.
"Where did you fix his marriage?" I said I don't know.
We've been invited to the wedding like guests.
what could we have done? I know you two are independent.
You know what's right or wrong for you.
But there are few things which the elders should handle.
There are thousands of things to be done.
First match the horoscope.
Hold on.
Hold on.
Mom.
Uncle.
There's no then we would've gotten married by now.
Long back.
Pawan wanted - We both do.
Yes, we both wantto involve our parents in our wedding.
Just so that you can know your future daughter-in-law and future son-in-law better, we've devised a plan.
So where did you guys meet? We met at a common friend's place.
Wellwe met at a photo exhibition.
Oh Pawan.
Pawan? Hi.
Shall we? Likeyou don't want totalk or something? Talk? - Yeah.
Why talk? We can That was that.
I mean you don't want to talk, so that's out.
I just broke up with my boyfriend.
Oh? Oh! So this was You are acook! Uncle, I am a gourmet chef.
Dear, can you cook? Cook? - You think he lets her cook.
He's the cook here himself.
The tea will get cold, drink.
How much you make? - Ranjeet.
Aunty, it's okay.
uncle's question is justified.
4, 5, 600,000.
Monthly? - Annually, son.
Annually, I think around 45-50 lakhs I'm part owner of the restaurant.
I am running it along with my friend.
He invested - Have a cookie! Son, if you two go out and work then who will look after the house? Take care of the house? I see.
What? Ohthe hotel people made this one, didn't they? But it's still nice.
Hi! Sushi, looking as sexy as ever.
How are you? They are enjoying.
You must be Pawan's dad.
You look so pretty.
- So cute.
You want to join us at the pool? Let's goLet's go.
Pool party, guys.
Come on.
Come on.
Punnu, listen.
2 bogies filled with guests are coming from Kanpur on the Kushinagar Express.
Sotreat them well.
2 bogies? You said we don't have to invite any guests! But they have an entire battalion coming Mother, I said it's just us.
2 bogies.
It is just us, son.
We have to invite the family.
Or else they will feel offended.
No drinks.
No drinks allow.
This is a Brahmin wedding.
No drinks allowed.
We Punjabis can't have a wedding without kebabs and alcohol.
Forget the guests, I'll feel offended.
Seenow he'll be mingling with the alcohol and non-veg eating crowd Look, Roliji, we cannot do everything according to you.
We didn't come here to sit idle.
Look, dear.
If you want we'll leave.
Dad, one second.
Pawan, do - One minute, Shahana.
There's a bigger thing.
Mother, you're just I am sorry.
- What? Look, this was bound to happen.
This is a failed exercise.
I don't think you two should get married.
You're right.
You're absolutely right.
You two love each other, right? So why do you want our approval? Right? Just move in together.
And live happily.
For as long as you can.
You don't need us.
Our own marriage broke-up in four years.
You two got divorced? - Yes.
He even has a second wife and kids.
Punnu! Whatever you saythey do get along.
They're fighting just like husband and wife.
I am not trying to hide anything, Shahana.
and not everything together.
Pawan, how can you hide such an important thing from your parents? My mother is going crazy regarding this marriage regarding the preparations.
I didn't want to tell her everything together.
I just thought I'll tell her everything gradually.
This is not done, Pawan.
Do you know how embarrassing it is for me, for my parents? I am not doing it intentionally, Shahana.
I understand.
- You don't understand, Pawan.
We're not on the same page.
Stop fighting you guys.
Parents are fucked up people.
Come on.
It's party time.
Shahana are you ready, let's go.
Oh, God! He threw daughter-in-law in the water.
I don't understand anything.
I am going to take a bath.
Punnu, is there a bathroom where we can freshen up.
Or do we need to take a dip in this pond too? Daddyji! Today evening we're having a bikini themed bachelorette.
- Oh my, God.
Cheers bitchesmeaning dogs.