Batman: Caped Crusader (2024) s01e01 Episode Script

1
Iggy, tell me what's going on. Please!
[Iggy] Someone in our outfit's been
sharing secrets with Rupert Thorne.
You wouldn't happen to know anything
about that, would you, Clarence?
What, you think it's me? Come on, Iggy.
You and me, we go way back.
[sputters] You know I'd never do that.
[Iggy] Sure. Sure, Clarence.
But the boss would like
to have a word with you anyway.
- No. Iggy, come on.
- [door closes]
Please, no!
I don't know who told you I wasn't
on the level, but you gotta believe me.
I'd never
- [blade clicks]
- No!
[screaming] No!
[man] Come on, hurry it up. Double time.
- We need all this stuff out of here now!
- Why the big rush?
Mr. Thorne says it looks like
we're going to get hit tonight,
and the swag's too valuable
to leave behind.
What, the cops? The boss has half
the precinct on the payroll.
Yeah. But it ain't the cops
I'm worried about.
[laughs] Oh, not you too.
That story's a load of bull.
- Marvin saw it last week.
- Marvin, who's in the hospital?
Yeah. How do you think he got there?
Well, then he's got a screw loose
because there ain't no friggin'
- [man] What?
- Shut up!
Someone's in here with us.
[clattering]
[suspenseful music]
- [gas hissing]
- [men coughing]
- [man shouts]
- [gunshot]
- [gasps]
- [crowbar clatters]
[grunting]
[gasps]
[groaning]
You stupid [groans]
[panting]
[grunts]
[shrieking noise approaching]
[silence]
[dramatic music playing]
[theme music playing]
[Batman] Three explosions in two weeks.
All three buildings can be traced
to shadow companies
operated by Rupert Thorne.
[Alfred] The police ruled
the first explosion a gas leak,
the second
an accidental electrical fire.
Someone's declared war on Thorne,
but they're covering their tracks.
Being smart about it.
That would suggest there's a crime boss
we don't know about.
One who's bold enough
to take on Rupert Thorne.
But if that's the case,
we could be looking at
An all-out gang war
on the streets of Gotham.
Good Lord.
I need to find out
who's behind these explosions.
And I know where
to start looking for them.
Police headquarters?
You think someone inside the department
is covering up these explosions?
It's Gotham, Pennyworth.
Does the corruption really surprise you?
[woman] Ladies and gentlemen of the jury,
with all due respect,
the prosecution's case is absurd.
My client isn't the mastermind
behind a smuggling ring.
He isn't a killer.
He's a desperate kid who took
the wrong job from the wrong people.
It's as simple as that.
[gavel bangs]
Court will recess
until the jury reaches a verdict.
It was a good closer, Miss Gordon.
But you know you're gonna lose, right?
- I had that jury eating out of my hand.
- Come on.
You know this kid's been set up
to take the fall.
Well, then he should have squealed
on his bosses.
Not my fault he wouldn't take a deal.
And I suppose it's not your fault
my key witness
took a sudden trip to Bermuda either?
I'm sure I don't know
what you're talking about, Barbara.
And I'm sure you do, Harvey.
It's all politics for you now.
Every conviction,
another ad for your campaign.
"Harvey Dent: Tough On Crime."
Hey, I'm just doing my job.
If putting hardened criminals behind bars
helps me in the polls, then
Oh, that reminds me.
- Here, hot off the presses.
- No, thanks.
Give it to someone
who might actually vote for you.
Oh, come on. I'm not that bad.
Look, I'll even give your kid a break.
Heads, I'll ask for 20 years to life.
Tails, he gets the chair.
I'm not betting a man's life
on a coin flip.
- You're an ass, Dent!
- Oh, don't go away mad.
Look, heads. You won!
[chuckles]
[suspenseful music]
[lock clicks]
[muttering, singing indistinctly]
[humming loudly]
- [gunshot, rope twirling]
- Crap.
Ah!
[screaming]
- [moaning]
- [train horn blowing]
[gasping] Help! Help me! Someone
- [Batman] Who's behind those explosions?
- [gasps]
Oh, God. Who what are you?
Three buildings blown to pieces.
You falsified the reports.
Who paid you?
- Are you crazy?
- [train horn blowing]
Pull me up!
- Give me a name.
- [panting] Just pull me up!
Oh, God! Hurry, please!
- I won't ask again.
- [gasping] It was the Penguin!
It was the freakin' Penguin! [screams]
[screams] Oh, God. Oh, my God.
If you're lying to me, I'll be back.
It was it was the Penguin.
It was the freakin' Penguin!
[Penguin]
I know I've done you wrong ♪
Remember that rainy eve ♪
That I drove you out ♪
With nothing but a fine-tooth comb ♪
And no one to blame ♪
Well, ain't that a shame ♪
Bill Bailey
Won't you please come home, come home? ♪
Bill Bailey, won't you please ♪
Come home ♪
[applause]
Oh, thank you. Thank you.
Hello. If it isn't Detective Arnold Flass.
Mm-mm, sugar.
You can frisk me any day of the week.
- [laughter]
- Hey, me next! Do me next!
Not if you were the last cop
on the force, Bullock.
- [crowd laughing]
- Mwah!
23 Skidoo, I bid you adieu.
[cheering and applause]
To think I could be at home about now,
doing my nails.
Or the dishes or my taxes.
It's not like I'm having fun here
either, Barbara.
But the commissioner can't exactly
skip a police fundraiser.
Well, so long as we're both miserable.
Thanks for humoring your old man.
Anytime, Dad.
It doesn't bother you that half
these people want to see you fail?
Oh, come on, honey.
I'm sure it's far more than half.
- Commissioner Gordon.
- Harvey.
- You know my daughter.
- Know her? If I had my way,
this little spitfire would
be working for me in the DA's office.
You know, Jim, once I'm elected mayor,
you and I are going to do great things
for this city.
Yeah, absolutely.
Who knows? Maybe then you won't
need outside help from giant bats.
So you're buying into rumors
off the streets now, Harvey?
Do you leave cookies out for Santa too?
What'd I tell you, Jim? Spitfire.
[Bruce] I've suspected the Iceberg
was some kind of front
for smuggling guns or drugs or worse.
But to take on Rupert Thorne
Yes, it would appear
you've underestimated the Penguin, sir.
Everyone has. That's how she wants it.
Flashy cabaret act, gambling ship,
hiding in plain sight. Smart.
Nice spread, huh? [laughs]
Well, that's Mama for you.
[chewing] Us Cobblepots
are all about style.
Hm. Say, sweetie.
You really ought to try the shrimp.
Mm! So yummy.
- You have cocktail sauce on your shirt.
- [gasps] Nuts!
[laughs] Well, uh,
guess my shirt got a little hungry.
Stuck-up little
Not even that pretty, anyway.
Smooth, Ronnie. Real smooth.
And you wonder
why Mama calls you the slow one.
Oh, go climb your thumb, half pint.
[Alfred] Do enjoy the party, Master Bruce.
- Was that a joke?
- I suppose.
Oh, it's Bruce Wayne!
Well, this is embarrassing.
You started the party without me.
- You made it, Bruce.
- And so did you, um
It's it's Aaron.
This is my mama's party.
Oh, that's swell. Say, Alan, be a pal
and find a spot for these.
Bruce! Late as always.
What was the problem this time?
Harvey, the only problem
is that you and I are at a party,
and neither of us has a drink.
[jazz plays]
Rupert Thorne.
What a lovely surprise.
I didn't expect you to show.
I wouldn't miss it. Supporting
local law enforcement is our civic duty.
True. So true.
I must say, I was devastated
to hear another of your properties
exploded the other night.
Did I hear you had an office
in that building? Heavens!
If you'd been there, why,
you would have been blown to pieces.
Itty-bitty pieces.
[chuckles] Actually, Oswalda, I was there.
Lucky for me, I got a tip and
hightailed it out of there just in time.
Oh? A tip, you say?
Indeed. You might say
a little birdie told me.
Itty bitty birdie.
See you around, Penguin.
So the duchess says,
"No, not on the first date."
- [laughter]
- Oh, for Pete's sake.
Guess I can't hold my liquor.
Be right back.
[suspenseful music playing]
[door knob clicks]
[Ronald] Well, Mama,
I'd say your little shindig
is a big success. [laughs]
[Penguin] Indeed, Buttercup.
It's been quite an evening.
Just full of surprises.
Guess it's not a yacht party
until someone falls overboard.
Uh-huh. Excuse me.
Bruce Wayne! What happened to you?
Guess it's not a yacht party
until someone falls overboard.
[women laugh]
[Aaron] So, how much you figure we cleared
off all these dumb coppers anyway?
The exact amount
almost doesn't matter, darling.
Embezzling thousands from Gotham's finest
right under their stupid noses
is a treasure in and of itself.
[laughter]
But I'll tell you what made
tonight truly unforgettable.
It was learning that one of my sweet,
precious, little angels
sold me out.
- Wait, What? No, Mama. We never
- It was Aaron!
- It had to be him!
- What? Come on!
Ronnie's the one who's always
saying crap behind your back!
You lousy, butt-kissing, snot-nosed punk!
I oughta break your neck!
Boys, boys, please.
Mama already knows which one of you it is.
No! No, I didn't.
You found the rat, Mama.
Yeah. He said it was that Clarence guy.
It wasn't me. I swear, it wasn't me.
- Sounds kind of guilty, don't he, Mama?
- You shut up!
Did you, uh, remember to eat something
at the party, Mama?
'Cause I know you get a little testy
sometimes when you're hungry.
[sobbing] Please, Mama. Please, don't.
- No, please!
- [shushes] It's okay, baby.
You know Mama never holds a grudge
for long.
Wait! Wait, wait, wait! No!
Mama! No! Please!
- [Aaron shouting, sobbing]
- [water bubbling]
[faint, muffled shouting]
He was my favorite.
Guess that makes you my favorite now.
[phone rings]
- Thorne.
- [Ronald] Mr. Thorne, Mama's onto us.
She thought it was Aaron
who tipped you off.
But she's gonna figure out it's me.
You gotta help me!
[Thorne laughs] Sorry, sonny.
I don't think you're the kind of man
I want in my organization.
Hell, you just sold out your own mother,
for God's sake.
Wait, wait, wait. But you you promised.
- What am I gonna do?
- Not my problem, kid.
- Bye now.
- [line disconnects]
[Penguin] What do you mean, gone?
Looks like he took one of the motorboats.
Do you have any idea what this means?
That Thorne got you to kill the wrong son?
No!
It means that brat's gonna squeal
about the whole operation.
Whatever it takes, find him.
[suspenseful music]
[rattling]
[yells]
Oh! Sweetie. Thank God.
I was hoping you'd be here.
Call me that again,
and you're gonna lose some teeth.
- What do you want?
- I need your help, sweet
Miss Gordon. She's gonna kill me.
- My mama.
- What?
She is not what she looks like.
She runs a mob.
[sputters] She's a scary lady! Please!
- You gotta help me.
- Why me?
Your dad's the only cop in Gotham
I know for sure isn't bent.
Can you take me to see him?
I'll tell him everything.
I'm busy.
Mama just killed my brother
right in front of me!
[Ronald] Oh, why did I have to pick Thorne
over my mother?
I mean, what a sap I am!
Who cares if she deserved it, or that
she's more of a monster than a mother?
I just had to be a big shot, right?
Oh, always had to be a big shot!
Hey, Ronald, how about you
stop the whining? At least until
Oh, God, she found me! I'm cooked!
[yells]
[tires screeching]
Okay. Hold on to something.
[tires screeching]
[gun cocks]
[suspenseful music]
- [screams]
- [tires screech]
Oh, God! Please, no, Mama! I'm sorry!
I'm so sorry, Mama!
Knock it off! Here, take the wheel.
- What? [moans]
- Take the damn wheel!
[grunts]
[grunts] Come on.
[Ronald moans]
[gun cocks]
[vehicle approaching]
[men shout]
[Ronald] I'm telling you,
we gotta leave right now.
We gotta go somewhere else,
somewhere secret.
Now, hold on, son. We can protect you.
No, that was before.
But now my mom is after me.
She knows! She knows!
- You're in police custody. This isn't
- Don't you get it?
She's got cops on her payroll,
and one of them had to see me come in.
- I'm telling you, we are not safe here.
- [Gordon] What are you talking about?
- What's going on, Flass?
- You need to make a call.
[Penguin] Thank you, Detective Bullock.
You've been most helpful.
I'll see you and Flass
get an extra 50 this week.
[grunting]
The little fink is spilling it
to Gordon right now.
Let me have one of the insiders
take care of it, keep it quiet.
No, it's too late for quiet.
You don't know what she can do.
The woman is a criminal genius.
She's been running rings
around you guys for months.
You think Thorne's buildings are suddenly
blowing up all over town by accident?
Mama bought herself a customized
military-grade, long-range cannon.
She's got it rigged up on the Iceberg.
With that thing, she could hit any place
in Gotham she wants:
warehouses, apartments, police stations.
You get it now?
I'll have the Coast Guard
bring in the Iceberg. Barbara!
- [alarm rings]
- Everybody, out of the building now!
- Go!
- [overlapping chatter]
[suspenseful music]
[sonar beeping]
Hurry it up. We're bringing down
the house tonight. Chop, chop.
Give me that. Taking too long.
There. Okay, boys, let's load it up.
[man grunting]
Well, I'll be damned, Virginia.
There really is a Batman.
- Iggy, break this jerk in half.
- Yes, ma'am.
[grunting]
- [bone snaps]
- [screams]
[coughing]
[yelling]
Scratch one police station.
[gasps]
Okay, Dracula. You asked for it.
[grunting]
[alarm ringing]
Get out of my way! Get out of my way!
Come on, move it!
[woman] Help me!
The alarm went off, and that lousy cop
just up and left me sitting here!
Okay, hang on.
[siren chirps]
[man over bullhorn] Attention!
This is the United States Coast Guard.
Fun's over, freak. Get out of my way.
[grunts]
Oof!
[growling]
- [alarm ringing]
- [panting]
I think that's everybody.
- [missile approaching]
- Down!
See that? And now we all
lose.
- [man] Get that hose over here!
- [man 2] Come on, let's go!
[overlapping chatter]
- We got lucky.
- Yeah. But we moved fast too.
- Made some of that luck on our own.
- Yeah, I guess so.
Oh, that Batman guy is real, by the way.
I met him tonight sort of.
He has a really nice car.
Since you refuse to sleep, Master Bruce,
I insist you at least eat.
I've been piecing together the full extent
of Penguin's empire.
- Former empire, you mean?
- Yes. And that's the problem.
Penguin was keeping Thorne's mob in check.
By taking down her operation
in one fell swoop
You've just given another piece
of the city to Rupert Thorne.
[Batman] I failed tonight.
That can't happen again.
[theme music plays]