Clean Sweep (2023) s01e01 Episode Script

1
Mam!
Where are your clothes?
Oh, it's just what I get
for cooking in my nice things.
Why, uh, aren't you at Camogie?
It was cancelled.
Roisin's mom gave me a lift.
I'm starving.
Well, have an apple.
Can I have a Magnum?
I got you ice pops!
Can't I have
a chocolate ice-cream bar?
Take an ice pop and go outside.
Can I not watch the telly?
It's too messy.
I'll be careful.
It's cold.
Go outside.
I don't need a serviette.
Chocolate stains.
Just take it outside.
Nymeria?
Oh, you're awake.
What time is it?
It's early.
Careful, it's hot.
You're already dressed.
I have an interview
in Carlow at 9:00.
Carlow at 9:00?
You should have left
an hour ago.
Yep, I'm gonna be late.
Mmm!
Want to trade places today?
Mm-hmm.
What, so you do
the shopping, the washing,
the Parent Association pow-wow,
drive back and forth
to the school,
to the GAA, to the physio?
OK, OK, I'll stick
with the traffic.
Ugh! I need this today.
Rough night?
Didn't sleep.
Should have woke me up.
I took a valium at 2:00.
You home for dinner?
Right now I am.
You with Fiona today?
Yeah, I need her.
She gets a start on
the paperwork on the drive back.
I was thinking about
getting a job, part-time.
Doing what?
Bookkeeping, accounting.
I'm good with numbers.
And what about the kids?
Part-time.
The kids will be in school.
We could use the money.
Yeah, we're
a little overextended.
That's why I need this promotion.
We'll talk about it later.
Bye.
This is Seapoint FM,
your source of news,
local and national.
Today, big pharma
versus little farmers.
Also, examining
the laws of unconsent
and how to fix County Wicklow's
overtaxed infrastructure.
The Department of Housing,
Local Government and Heritage
announces another multi-million
euro capital investment program.
I hate having I hate having to
drink this muck forever.
I know you do, love.
Cait?
Put the book down.
Breakfast.
Cait!
Book, breakfast.
Derek, let's go!
Breakfast!
Chill. I'm right here.
Eggs are kind of disgusting.
That's 'cause it's chicken fetuses.
Derek, please!
It's not true.
An egg's an egg.
A foetus is a fertilized egg.
Fertilized with what?
Rooster splooge.
Ew.
OK. OK.
I've had one cup of coffee.
And I'm not ready
for this discussion.
Can I have coffee?
You don't need coffee.
You have youth.
An egg is
an unborn chicken baby?
Yes.
No.
OK, Caitlin, Derek,
go brush your teeth.
Niall, time
for your antibiotics.
But I feel better.
I know you feel better.
But you still have
to finish them.
Just a couple more days,
and then you're done.
If eggs aren't collected
soon enough, the hen eats them.
She'll like it.
And she'll continue
to eat the eggs.
If Derek and Caitlin
aren't ready on time,
I might eat them.
Et voilà.
Done.
Guys, let's go!
It's all pretty horrible.
It's not fair
boys don't get one.
Boys don't have a uterus.
Derek, come on. Let's go.
Let's go, Derek!
Chill, I'm right here!
What are you doing?
Nothing.
Her name is Doireann Carrick.
Shut it, Cait!
Ah! She's a dote!
Jeez! Will the two of youse
She gave him a love bite.
Oh, really?
Is she your girl?
Oh, for fuck's sake!
Hey! Language!
Drop me here.
I'll board the rest of the way.
Have a good day!
Where is it, his love bite?
Right here. It was so
Ew!
Oh?
So, Cait, what did you tell Logan
about the dance?
Haven't yet.
You're gonna have
to come up with something.
He's waiting on you.
Jesus, he's a desperate one.
You're gonna need your hurley
to keep him away, love.
Don't slam it.
Hiya, Caitlin.
Oh.
And after you're done the selling
Sorry, sorry, sorry.
I was afraid something
had happened to you.
You're all sweaty.
No, just running a little late.
I went ahead and started.
I was just
explaining the protocol
for the sixth class
graduation party fundraiser.
Each collection box
will contain 20 euro:
two fivers, the rest in coins.
After you're done selling,
count the total amount
of money in the collection box
and submit the total.
Minus the initial 20 euro.
Plus the twenty.
I'll reconcile the totals.
This will alleviate any confusion.
Yeah, OK.
It's it's your deal.
Yeah.
Next order of business,
cupcakes.
I still need volunteers to bake.
I can do it.
Put me down too.
Grand.
Yeah, I can help as well.
Are you sure, Shelly?
What with all you
have going on at home?
What's that supposed to mean?
It's just
we all know how busy you are.
Everyone's busy.
Yeah.
Hitler got his start
at a Parent Teacher's
Association in Bavaria.
Katie has a tough job.
Fighting fires is a tough job.
I have to get back
to class, Mrs. Mohan.
Maybe we could meet
tomorrow morning, yeah?
Uh
I'm available.
- Uh, g-grand.
- Yeah, tomorrow morning.
See you.
I'm Emma's dad.
Or, as I used to be known, Matt.
Shelly.
Yeah, my, um, son mentioned
there was an American girl
at school.
My wife transferred here.
She's away during the week.
You don't work?
I'm a writer.
Ah!
Mysteries, fem-centric,
but writing a blog.
Irish adventures
of an American DILF.
Dad I'd like to
Friend.
Friend, right.
Oh, uh, nice to meet you.
The pleasure is mine.
It's grand.
Terrific.
Uh, well, Matt, uh,
I have to be somewhere.
A woman of mystery?
Oh, hardly.
A woman of groceries.
See you tomorrow.
Beef, pork and lamb,
the secret to my spag bol.
Can I get a price check
on pineapple, please?
Price check on pineapple.
Hey, what's the craic?
What time are you home tonight?
I'm making spaghetti bolognese.
Not too late.
Early enough to get
Niall from the physio?
Uh, no.
This will take a couple of hours.
And I've got to file up
the paperwork.
And with traffic
OK, OK, I can handle it.
Derek will be driving soon.
Not soon enough.
Be safe!
Always.
Bye.
Well, how's Supermam?
Stressed.
Spag bol for dinner tonight.
Great!
You ready for this?
I live for this.
And what's your name?
Tony.
Tony?
You like Tony Stark?
Ironman?
Perfect.
So, Tony
tell me, what do you like
to do for fun
when you're not flying around
in your Ironman suit?
Do you like school, Tony?
Uh, yeah, I I like football.
Me too!
Yeah, who are you keen on?
Arsenal.
That that's that's
my daddy's team.
I see.
Well
Tony, has your daddy
ever done anything to you
that hurt you?
Um
It's OK, Tony.
You can tell us.
He made Mammy cry.
I I I miss Mammy.
Mags?
Maggie?
Charlie?
It's OK. It's just me.
How did you find me?
It weren't easy.
It weren't fucking easy.
God, Maggie, you look so good.
No, I I
We we can't do this here.
My family
The people know me,
us, my husband.
Yeah. You got a crippled lad,
scrawny boy who takes the bus.
You stay away from my family!
No. No, no, Maggie, look.
I'm in a hotel near here,
Glencara House or Hotel.
Follow me, yeah?
No.
No. I I I'll meet you there.
OK.
Glencara, room?
223. Here.
OK, I feel I I need some time,
get these home, start dinner.
The way you talk
to them, the children,
you must be a good father.
Yeah, it's harder
when they're your own.
Mmm!
My oldest son is at that age.
He talks a lot of shite.
Time to grab a pint?
Promised I'd be home
for dinner tonight.
Spag bol.
You're not gonna let me in?
Yeah.
Oh!
I've been waiting for years
to do this again.
How did you find me?
I came to Ireland twice.
I even made a trip to America,
but no trace
of Deirdre Ann Fallon.
I gave up.
My life was shite.
And then I found God and Google.
And eventually,
I I found a deed pole registry
entry from 2015.
Did you need a passport?
You found me.
You have to go away now.
Charlie, forget about me.
No, look.
Look what I've kept all these years.
This is just before they got Kenny.
Each of us must turn
our back on our sins
and repent and be baptized
in the name of the Lord
so that our sins can be forgiven.
I couldn't save Kenny.
But I've come to save you.
Did you tell
anyone else you found me?
You don't have to be afraid of me.
Who else?
Who else knows you're here?
Your brother?
Who else knows
about Deirdre Fallon?
Most of us want to know
God's plan for our lives.
Look, fuck God's plan!
Charlie, what's your plan?
He's cheating on you,
your husband.
You have to go away now!
I followed him two days ago
to a block of flats.
He was with a woman,
a black woman.
Look, there's almost two grand.
Just go!
I don't want your money.
Well, what do you want?
To save you.
To save us both, Mags.
I'm Mrs. Shelly Mohan.
Maggie is dead.
Not in God's eyes.
He sees you.
Who are you
Who are you calling?
Your husband.
It's time for you to pay for
your sins.
No!
No, no, no. No, no!
End the call.
There she is, my Magpie.
End the call!
I'm offering you salvation!
Ah! Ah!
Fuck! You shot me!
Ah!
Hello?
Everyone OK?
It's the,
um, goddamn champagne Cork!
Almost took my eye out.
Oh!
Oh!
Ah!
Ah!
Oh, sorry, ma'am.
OK.
Mrs. Mohan?
Aelish?
Well
How funny!
I thought that was you!
What are you doing here?
Oh, uh, nothing, uh, exercise.
Oh!
I live, uh,
right up the hill, there.
Oh, great!
Uh, see you later!
Why?
When you bring Niall
into the clinic.
- Oh, yes, yes. Of course!
- Yeah, see you then.
Slaá.
Grand.
Mam!
Where are your clothes?
Nymeria?
I have to drive
your brother to the clinic.
Keep an eye on the pasta sauce.
In a minute!
Now! Do it!
We'll be back in an hour.
Further along on the M11,
it's slow approaching
Junction 5 Bray North.
And it's moving pretty well
into Kilmacanogue.
Wicklow's weather: mostly dry with
some
Hey, love.
What's up?
I'm just gonna have dinner
at Luke's house tonight.
Ah! I I'm making pasta!
Luke and me just have
a science project to finish.
Luke and I.
Is it OK with Luke's mom?
Yeah, yeah, they're
just getting takeaway.
OK, but home by 9:00.
It's a school night.
And call if you need a lift.
Ta.
Alles copacetic?
Yeah, she just gets a bit mental
if she don't know where I am.
Cool.
You don't mind me
smoking your gear?
Mi weed es su weed.
Here, spark it.
Oh, fuck!
Did you know dolphins sleep
only using
half their brain at a time,
so they can go to the surface
and take a breath of air?
That's very interesting.
And one eye is always open,
because they're always
watching for predators.
Quit gabbing.
You can tell me all
about it on the drive home.
What were you doing?
Huh?
Now, Niall, isn't it
called breath therapy?
Not talking therapy.
Go on.
Five minutes more,
then I'll just do a quick check
of your breathing exercises.
Dr. Royer
is still with someone.
Hey, sunshine.
Hey, Dad.
Shoot anyone today?
I never shot anyone, love.
Once, I shot at someone.
How was your day, Shell?
Shoot anyone?
Um, dinner will be ready in 15.
All right.
I'm gonna take a quick shower.
Caitlin, are we gonna watch
the match later?
Yeah, I'm on.
So, I didn't pass
that test two weeks ago.
He came back on Friday.
If he didn't come by Friday,
he's only there 2 days.
Someone said
that it was a horse.
It could be a donkey.
Like the Antartica.
And there's penguins.
You've got a crippled lad,
scrawny boy who takes the bus.
He's cheating on you,
your husband.
I'm Mrs. Shelly Mohan.
Each must turn
his back on their sins
You stay away from my family!
Our sins can be forgiven.
There she is, my Magpie.
Maggie is dead!
I'm gonna take
Nymeria for a walk.
Now?
We're just eating.
She didn't get a walk.
I'll have Derek walk her later.
I want to do it!
We'll figure it out, Shelly.
It's just money.
Can I come too?
You can't.
You guys finish up.
Hi. Hi.
Good girl.
Heya.
Hi!
Uh, how did it go?
How'd what go?
The science project,
the reason you missed dinner.
Went well.
Were you
Were you smoking?
No, I wasn't.
You are smelling the experiment.
OK.
I have reading to do.
I'll see you at home.
And Owen Murphy goes off.
Putting the pressure
on the fullback.
A second handler comes in
to wrap him up.
Replay of Wicklow versus Sligo.
Do you want to watch?
They were there in 2019.
They're here now.
Are you OK?
Fine. Just don't like GAA.
I like it.
Three years ago
at the first 20 minutes.
Sexy.
Are the kids in bed?
Cait and Niall are.
I assume Derek's in his room
killing zombies
or gangsters
or Nazis
or zombie gangster Nazis.
Deeper.
Harder.
Jesus, Shell.
What the hell?
I'm so thirsty.
What?
That was so
I mean, you were so
Jesus, where the hell
did that come from?
I don't know, Jason.
Do we have to talk about it?
No, no, we don't.
It's just you think
you know someone.
Maybe you just forget
what I used to be like.
Mohan.
Where?
The Glencara?
Uh, yeah, I know it. Yeah, yeah.
Fantastic.
Yeah, I'll be right there, sir.
Some fella just had himself shot
in a manky hotel
on the Killarney Road.
O'Connor's giving it to me.
It's a test.
If I nail it,
he'll have to promote me.
Were you always a clean freak?
It's something I can control.
What? Youse have another fight?
We didn't.
Police work.
People make mistakes.
I won't tell your dad
about the weed
if you stop.
Good evening, sir.
Thanks.
There he is, soon-to-be
Detective Inspector Mohan.
Fuck off.
Who's O'Neill talking to?
A Dutch family on holiday.
In the room next to
your dead fella,
came back from Connemara
to find a bullet hole
in the wall.
Three murders in three months?
The Wild West.
This is ours to fuck up, Fiona.
Apparently, it's yours
to fuck up, Sergeant Mohan.
Yeah.
Thanks.
Liam, let's go.
One more, and I'll be
out of your hair.
Sorry, the floor is
Thank you.
Martin's not gonna like
you touching his body.
Martin can kiss my arse.
Martin would love that.
"Philip Paul Whelan,
Newcastle upon Tyne."
Well, Philip came
a long way to get himself shot.
No laptop.
No briefcase.
Champagne, two glasses.
He was expecting someone.
A celebration cut short.
There are a couple
of disposable razors
and a lot of hair trimmings
around the back of the sink.
Changed his appearance.
Yeah, or just getting
cleaned up for his celebration.
Quit your shitehawking
and get away from my corpse.
Leading the news this morning,
Gardai have launched
an investigation into a murder
that took place on
the Killarney Road off the N11.
Detectives confirmed
that late last night,
the victim, a man believed
to be in his early 40s,
was discovered
with multiple gunshot wounds
in a hotel room
Shit!
Killing raises speculation
that gangland violence
may be spreading.
The clock is ticking.
The killer is out there.
The next 48 hours will be
crucial if we want to catch him.
Yes, sir.
Sorry I'm late.
No worries.
Mary's gotta grade papers.
She's got a real job, I guess.
She can't do it today.
Oh, OK.
What's with the shades?
Uh
Um, would you want
to get a drink?
Like a caffeinated beverage?
No, like an alcoholic beverage.
Well, this is wrong
on so many levels.
If we were drinking
bloody Marys,
nobody would think twice.
So, it's the whiskey
that makes this wrong?
Not the Disney cups or
the fact it's not even 9:30?
Fuck it. It's noon somewhere.
To a couple of great moms.
Sláinte!
You want to you want
to talk about whatever it is
that's going on?
I don't.
I wish I could.
It's just
I get it.
You don't.
Nobody does.
What the fuck?
What? I I thought
What the fuck?
Fuck me. I'm sorry.
Look, hold on. Hold on!
We haven't even talked cupcakes.
Baked
When did you get home?
Did you go through my bag?
Nymeria knocked it on the floor.
It's Parent's Association.
It's petty cash. I'm responsible.
I didn't touch your fucking bag.
Dinner's at 6:00.
Do these dishes.
They're not mine!
Do these dishes
before I get back.
No wonder he sleeps around.
You'd never touch
Niall or Caitlin!
Take as long as you'd like,
Miss Fallon.
Maggie?
I'm right here.
I need you, Shelly.
Slow down on
the booze and pills.
What time is it?
Then after, we can talk
about bookkeeping
or basket weaving
or whatever it is you think
will give
your life more meaning.
You're a real asshole, Jason.
O'Connor gave me
this one as a test.
If I want to make
detective inspector,
I can't cock it up!
Can I not piss in peace?
: Mom! Mom!
Oh God!
Oh, Jesus!
You're all right.
You're all right.
Get a towel.
You're all right.
You're all right.
You're all right.
You're OK.
Spit it out. Spit it out.
You're OK.
I know. You're OK.
Is Niall dying?
For God's sake, Cait!
Niall's dying?
Go back to bed, both of you.
It's OK. It's all right.
Shush. Shhh, shhh.
I hate my life.
We're here for you.
Breathe. You OK?
You OK?
You're OK.
OK.
Go on. I've got this.
I love you, Shelly.