Comic Book Men s01e01 Episode Script
Junk
How did Batman get Robin? Bruce Wayne adopted Dick Grayson after Bruce Wayne saw Dick Grayson's parents murdered at a circus.
He watches the kid's parents get killed.
He immediately scrambles out there.
He's like, "you want to live with me?" Is that the way it went? - No.
- No.
Actually-- he does a little private-eying.
- Okay.
- He goes and checks the ropes.
He's like, "acid on the ropes.
" - Right, of course.
- "This was murder.
" Mm-hmm.
So he goes and solves the murder, but he also sees himself in Dick.
- Grayson.
- Oh, okay.
He's a multi-billionaire, man.
It's like if Donald Trump today was like, "I want a ten-year-old boy, pronto!" - He has a ten-year-old boy.
- He's got it there.
It's there yesterday.
One of the celebrity apprentices is on it like that.
All right, imagine that.
Getting adopted by a billionaire.
I don't care what I had to do.
I-I would dress up like a ten-year-old boy.
Have a giant lollipop, pinwheel hat.
Kinda like you, man.
Hello, and welcome to Comic Book Men.
I'm Kevin Smith.
Bryan Johnson.
- Walt Flanagan.
- Ming Chen.
And Michael Zapcic.
If you've ever listened to this show, you know that anytime I'm anywhere near the motherland, uh, my home and native land, New Jersey, I love to sit down with my fellow podcasters-- the meat in the sandwich here, if you will, Walt runs the Secret Stash, and he's kept it alive in an economy where comic book stores are failing left and right.
Oh, my God.
Get a room.
As long as I've known Walter, my friend Bryan Johnson here has known Walter much longer.
They go back to even grade school.
Bryan, one of the funniest people in the world, he's here at the Stash all the time.
Doesn't quite work here, though.
No.
What do you do here all the time? You guys must have, in your youth, read comics with an eye towards the hot superheroines.
Who was your dream heroine? My favorite has always been Caitlin Fairchild, Gen 13.
You couldn't handle that.
Oh, I could definitely handle that.
How dare you? He's ready to flip the table.
What a moronic answer! - Zap? - I'm a Catwoman guy.
- Are you really? - I am.
I love Catwoman.
Which version of Catwoman? Uh, goggles' Catwoman.
Goggles Paisano Catwoman, yeah.
- Really? - I like the purple-- purple dress Catwoman for me.
With the slit.
With the little cape.
Slit up to the thigh.
And she had the cat o' nine tails.
- Oh, yeah? - Uh-huh.
No.
I'm going with goggles.
I'd go, uh, Zatanna, chick magician.
She wears a little tuxedo and fishnets.
- Right.
- She's already in fishnets.
She's half-undressed already.
And she's magical.
So if you're a terrible lay, she could be like, "I forgot.
" - Hey, how's it going? - Hey, how you doing? We have a toy store down by the shore, and we got a bunch of comic books in, - which we don't really mess with.
- Okay.
I was hoping that you could take a look at them.
- I'd be happy to.
- Cool.
Hey, Walt! I just brought some stuff that I thought would be key.
Wow.
Look at that.
Whoa.
Hypodermic needle.
Have you ever seen this? You know what? I've only heard about this book.
Back in the '40s, it wasn't as scandalous, I don't think, to put a needle on the cover as it came to be in the '60s and '70s.
There was no code back then, right? No code.
And a hypodermic needle, I guess, wasn't as synonymous with Drugs? Illicit activities as it is today.
At a certain point, they were banned.
Really? D.
C.
tackled heroin, remember? With Green Arrow discovering his kid's sidekick, speedy, was sitting there shooting up.
Still shocking to this day when you see Speedy shoving that needle into his arm, and then you see Green Arrow in the background, you know, shocked.
- Heartbroken.
- Heartbroken.
And Green Lantern, you know-- - has to hold him back.
- Yeah.
What do you think he's holding him back from? Like, "I must help him!" Or "I'll beat him" within an inch of his life!" 'Cause it was the '70s, and you could get away with that.
You don't know what Green Arrow's gonna do.
If you remember, in that comic, he smacked him around.
- Did he really? - Yeah, he slapped him.
Well, how old was Speedy at this point? Speedy was 17.
But Speedy is not Green Arrow's son.
He's just his sidekick, the way Robin is not related to Batman.
Are you allowed to slap some sense into him? - Of course.
- He's not your kid.
That's like walking up to somebody else's kid and-- - are you allowed to bring Robin in to fight The Penguin and The Joker? Good point.
I was wondering if you could give me some kind of value or what we're talking about here.
In the condition it is, But I think I couldn't make a profit on it.
It just seems like it's-- it's the condition that hurts it so much.
Yeah.
I actually have one more Batman item I brought.
This I thought was really, really unique.
Oh, ho, ho.
Whoa.
Bob Kane, 1970.
The creator of Batman.
This is amazing.
How did you get this? This came in with this collection.
The collector who got this apparently was eating in a place that Kane was eating in New York.
And, uh, he asked him if he would do a quick sketch, and Bob did it for him.
In 1970.
Bob Kane, no longer with us.
This is a one-of-a-kind.
I mean, this has gotta be priceless.
It was the classic Kane, you know.
Grinning ear to ear.
Happy to be fighting crime.
Happy to be fighting crime.
- Batman used to be happy? - Yeah.
At least, that was the Bob Kane.
And every time he drew Batman, he had, like, this giant smile, and Robin too.
That would be off-putting, though.
Like, you're mugging somebody, and then someone dressed like the Batman shows up, but he's smiling.
Yeah, that's what I'm saying.
Even with those smiles, behind it, there's still something spooky and eerie about it.
Unnerving, like, "why are you smiling at me? Stop it.
" And he's-- still, you talking about Batman and Robin.
I mean, I think it's Santa Claus, Michael Jackson, Batman, and then Robin are the most recognized faces on the earth.
- Robin? - Yeah.
I think so.
Batman and Robin together.
Jesus nowhere on that list.
It looks like whatever Kane drew this on, there looks to be-- you can see some words coming through the other side.
Like, it almost looks like a script or a document of some kind, something typed.
I've always been curious what was under there, but I was always worried it was gonna diminish the value of the piece by opening it.
That's a concern, but it doesn't look like it was a professionally framed piece.
Right, yeah.
It looks like you could take the back out easily and open it up.
You don't know what this piece of paper could be.
It could be, like, maybe he was working on another character.
I have no idea, man.
Maybe some new character maybe he never got a chance to do.
It could be anything.
So let's check it out and see what we got.
On the front, the Bob Kane drawing.
On the back, national treasure! Yes, and that's what I was going for.
Whatever's on the back of this could be so huge, it could make this sketch even jump up to $100,000.
Right.
He was like, "let's crack it open.
" He's had it all this time, and he's just like, "you know--" He talked him into it.
Silver-tongued devil, you.
You should've been like, "you know what? Take your pants off, too.
" Just see how far you could get it going.
I was getting woozy and sweaty, 'cause I'm like, "I don't even know what's gonna be on the other side of this.
" And as he fumbles with the, uh--with the-- - we're still talking-- - Frame.
We are still talking about the comic book page now, right? Actually, I was talking about the pants.
You want me to get my white gloves? Nah, but you gotta figure, if Bob touched it, we can touch it.
- All right.
- Let's check it out, man.
- Be careful.
- Okay.
Wow, man.
See what we got here.
- Whew.
Here we go.
- Here we go.
Uh, I don't know what that is.
You guys wanna-- It's a press release.
Yeah, for some sort of, uh, gall--art gallery that was having a showing of some sort of paintings.
It could've been something that he had on him.
He probably did get stuff like this all the time.
You know, being-- - an artist.
- Yeah, Bob Kane.
Was the guy let down? It was a real, like, Capone vault moment.
We're like, "what's gonna be behind there?" What's on it?" And then we open it up, and it's just like, eh.
So not a big deal, but I wanted to know.
You know, the last thing you want to do is end up not realizing what you had.
- Right, right, right.
- Right.
So how much do you actually think this would be worth? I couldn't even begin to, uh, put a value on this.
I mean, it's like finding a signature of George Washington or something.
I wouldn't take less than 10 grand for it.
Man, you guys are blowing me away.
I've been looking at a new Camaro.
It's absolutely amazing.
I would bring this to an auction house.
Christie's heritage.
I don't know what you traded for it, but it looks like-- it looks like you made out.
Thanks, guys.
Seriously, thanks a lot.
Thank you very much.
Thanks for bringing them in.
- Take it light, fellas.
- Be well.
Take care, man.
Wow.
That's a hell of an autograph.
Doesn't get much rarer than that.
So the store looks less cluttered than it has in recent memory.
It was getting a little, uh, dicey there for a while.
A store remains open as long as we have, you start to accumulate stuff.
It was starting to look like Kevin Spacey's library in Se7en.
Just--when they broke into his room of weird collections, like, "we found - Ming.
- What's going on? Can you tell me why this stuff is just piled everywhere? - It's Mike.
- Mike! - What's up, Walt? - Hey.
Do you know where these Moon-- like, all these copies of Moon Knight came from? These are--are freebies.
- They were free? - Yep.
He told me you had bought 'em.
How in the hell did I buy them? You brought them up here.
Ming, you look like a donkey wearing a straw hat.
What does that mean? Stuff is coming up from downstairs, like The Blob.
We gotta figure out a way to move it.
All right, let's do it.
Let's find a way.
I say we just bring it to Collingswood then.
For those who have never been to a flea market, you're missing out.
It's the great American garage sale.
But if you've never been to the Collingswood Auction flea market, and you're in New Jersey, you are missing out on a cross-section of the fabric that makes up the United States of America.
You take the pulse of America right there.
You're not kidding, man.
Never mind New York and L.
A.
The pulse is the Collingswood market.
I was thinking maybe a little competition between you, Mike, and Ming.
- All right.
- Winner gets what? What do you need, Ming? What's the carrot on the stick I can dangle in front of your nose? Can I have Mike's job? No, you don't go after a man's job.
That's second only to going after his wife.
Piece of [Bleep.]
.
Here's what I'm thinking then.
Whoever can sell the most of this stuff, I'll give them two weekends off in a row.
All right.
Bryan, you got any interest in getting in on this? If it means Ming losing something he loves, I'm totally in.
I said, divvy it up between you three.
Mike, you take Ming, you take Bryan, you take Get yourselves a table each.
Sell all your stuff.
Whoever brings home the most money for their stuff-- - Right.
- Is the winner.
Look who's here.
Woo-hoo! Should've known you'd be early, Ming.
Where's all your money you made? It's in my pocket.
You didn't make [Bleep.]
.
You know it.
You told us to be there at 8:00.
You got there at 7:00 to try and cut out-- You set us up for failure.
Apple polisher, that's what you are.
"I'm gonna show Walt I'm the best.
" But on a team, there's always gonna be that one person whose nose is brown.
- Yes.
Has to be.
- There has to be, or else the team is worthless.
- Yeah.
- And we know we got that guy.
And I cherish that nose, and I want you to keep it right where it's at and never remove it.
Firmly planted between Walt's cheeks.
How much is this stuff, anyway? I don't know.
You make up the prices.
Christmas is coming up, dude.
Somebody in your life must need a dancing Bart.
Stains all over him.
Ming, what the hell? That's not my-- that's your problem.
It's not my problem.
What are you doing? Let the competition begin.
This is, like, the Ferrari of the collecting world.
I love the Six Million Dollar man so much.
It's freaking me out a little bit.
So, Bryan, what's new? Mostly I just stand here and watch my life pass before me.
- With me.
- Mm-hmm.
Actually, that's what I do here.
I watch your life pass by.
- Hey.
- Hey, how you doing? - Doing pretty good.
- Oh.
I have brought some things into your shop you might have an interest in.
- Toys.
- Yeah.
I have some Megos here.
Ooh.
I got a Robin.
- I got a circle suit Spider-man.
- Very cool.
And, uh, well, this is not exactly a Mego, but this is the, uh, Six Million Dollar Man.
Oh, this is beautiful.
You know what that is? Of course I do.
The telescopic sight.
That's the bionic eye.
- Very nice.
- Agh! Walter.
Got some stuff you need to see.
Six Million Dollar Man.
I mean, how big was that in our childhood? The Six Million Dollar Man was kind of like a superhero.
He had strength.
He could run really fast.
And he was always fighting crime, and it was badass, because that was the closest thing to a comic book show on TV at that point.
Yep.
These are yours? Yes, these are from my collection.
I love the Six Million Dollar Man so much.
From the day I was born till about age 15, my most vivid memory is-- - please say [Bleep.]
ing a girl, please.
Please say-- I said till I was 15.
Okay.
My most cherished memory as a child is sitting down in front of the TV and watching Steve Austin rip off Bigfoot's arm.
Nothing else topped that.
You built your life around this episode because finally, this dude was gonna fight something of maybe equal strength, because you're the Bionic Man.
And nobody else is bionic.
Like, every episode could just end with You know, justice.
But if you're fighting Bigfoot, there's a chance they could have a throwdown.
And then in the midst of this episode, doesn't he pull off Bigfoot's arm, and it's revealed that Bigfoot is also bionic? Yeah, I mean-- Aren't you supposed to say, "spoiler alert," when you say stuff like that? I guess.
I think there's a 25-year moratorium, though.
I had all three of these dolls as a child, Bry.
Are those high-ticket items, Walt? This is no cheap stuff? Oh, this is not cheap stuff, Bry.
This is like the Ferraris of the collecting world.
You could probably really win your kid's respect if you had this in your collection.
All my daughter's friends come over, and I'm like, "come in.
Look.
Six Million Dollar Man.
" "Come on.
Come on, girls.
Walt wants to talk about dolls again.
" What would you think would be a fair price? Could you still look through the back of the box - You can.
- To see through Steve's eye? You can.
Uh, the plastic in the window was still crisp? It was still nice? - It is.
- All right.
- 200? - Less.
Get outta here.
So what are you looking for for the Six Million Dollar Man? For you guys, I can do, uh, if you wanted him, 250.
I don't want to insult you or beat you up.
But, um, is there any way you could take 150? I honestly could not.
It's an unfortunate thing, but I like you.
And because I like you, you know, um, I could do this one here for 200, if you want.
Would you do 175? Cash? If you wanna do 185, it's yours.
You can have it in here.
Other than that, I-- that is the absolute, like-- What if I gave you guys the extra 10 bucks? - Would you do that? - You'd do that? I'll kick in the extra ten, yeah.
You'd do that? - 185.
- 185.
I get to look through his eye.
That's all I ask.
You can look through the eye as many times as you want.
I'm a part owner.
And I can't wait to go tell my girlfriend.
Great deals here.
Action figures, comics.
You like wearing shirts? - $3? - $3 for that.
Come on.
All right.
Junior makes a purchase.
Everything 5 bucks.
Thanks a lot, man.
Sure thing.
Thank you.
- I'll be back.
We'll be here.
You know, these retail for $50.
- How much it is? - 10 bucks.
All right, I'll take it.
Thank you very much.
Ming, I'm breaking a sweat over here.
Don't bother me.
I'm making a sale.
X-Men: Evolution Colossus, beautiful, beautiful piece.
Card's a little bent, but it's still a good price.
Ringle, ringle.
Coins as they jingle.
Mike, what do you got so far? About 40.
Bryan? Think I've made, like, Let's see it.
I'm not just gonna flash that kind of cash around here.
I'm catching up to you.
All right.
Even though you gave me the crap, I'm still gonna move it.
You have an empty cart.
You want to fill it up with some good stuff? Fill it up with some good stuff.
- Oh, sure.
- Discounted toys.
Let me see what you have.
Discounted, stained-up, androgynous Bart.
Good stuff.
He went back into the world of sales, actually dealing with the public.
And not only did you deal with the public, but you dealt with the Collingswood public.
- Yeah.
- What was that like? It was a nightmare.
I can't imagine this being my life.
Why? You don't see it as the magical Asgardian place like we see it? Like you cross a rainbow bridge to a world of goods? You know, it's probably the customers.
It's prob--it comes down to I just don't want to deal with people, you know? You look like a woman with taste, right? Let me intro-- - What? - Don't do that.
You're a collector of fine art? I got fine art right here.
What? There's a good hour where I'm like, "wow, this is awesome.
" Look at all this stuff.
" And then after that, I'm like, "oh, my God, look at these people.
" Like, the reason they're not in the mall is because they're not allowed in the mall.
I'm making a sale over here.
Let me come back, but then-- Oh, you're not coming back.
They never come back.
Wow.
Must be something pretty valuable in that bag.
Mike, how was your weekend? It was good, thanks, Ming.
Cooked dinner for the family.
We watched Rango.
Rango, the movie Rango? No, just some dude in our neighborhood's named Rango.
So we just followed him around for a couple of hours.
What are you talking about? Hi.
Uh, hi.
- Lovely child.
- Thank you.
I'm actually looking to sell him.
- Uh.
- Is that life-sized? Yes, it's considered life-sized.
Okay, why you looking to sell it? Well, I'm starting up my own little business of making my own dolls.
I have a couple of other Chuckys, so, um, I think maybe I could part with one.
Maybe.
- Okay.
- It's creepy.
It's freaking me out a little bit.
You know who Chucky was named after? - Charles Manson? - That's right.
His full name in the movie was, uh, Charles-- - Lee Ray.
- Charles Lee Ray.
So Charles for Charles Manson, Lee for Lee Harvey oswald, and Ray for James Earl Ray.
Okay.
They tried to make it a somewhat serious horror.
I don't think it was ever treated as "serious" horror, a little doll running around.
You collect a lot of dolls? - Yeah.
- Yeah? Yeah, a lot.
Who manufactured the doll? It doesn't look like a McFarlane.
No, Spencer's was putting them out.
- Spencer's, huh? - Yes.
McFarlane may be a little bit more detail-oriented, little bit harder to come by.
Do you have the box, by any chance? No.
Rule of thumb, always keep the box, especially if there's something you want to resell.
Well, he's part of the family, you know.
We don't keep family members in boxes usually.
You don't sell family members either, though.
Well, not in this day and age.
What was really weird was that she almost treated the doll like it was a living, breathing person.
Like--or it was like a child to her.
It was really strange.
This was not an-- a teenager.
But she's walking around in a corset with a doll tucked under her arm that she thinks is real.
Yes.
Why did you not immediately throw a butterfly net over her and haul her off? It's not really our job to do that, is it? It's everybody's job to clean up the streets.
You can't just be like, "oh, we're busy.
We're at work.
We're at our nine-to-fivers.
" But our first priority is to Stash.
Can we make money off the mentally ill? What are you looking to get today for the Chucky doll? I was thinking, like, I could probably do - 100? - Yeah.
No, I can't do it.
I can't.
Not for 100.
Nope.
Sure? I don't even know if I could do it for 500.
I mean, if you don't want to buy him-- Yeah, um, unfortunately, on this piece, that's probably the best that we're gonna be able to offer you today is 100.
Ugh.
Well, he's happy to come home with me, so.
I bet he is.
I feel bad.
Like, I think he's, like, sad.
Yeah, aww.
- Thank you for coming in.
- Okay.
- Thank you for showing us.
- Thank you, yeah.
Bye-bye.
Say, "bye.
" Bye.
- Bye, Chucky.
- Later, Chuck.
That was scary.
My favorite horror flick of all time is The Shining because the same image that scared me when I was ten still scares me today, kid's on a big wheel, going along the carpet.
Turns a corner.
There are those twin girls, the most terrifying image ever captured on film.
Still to this day, when that moment happens, I wet myself just a little.
A little comes out, you know, and I have to excuse myself.
What about you, Ming? Your favorite horror movie? Mine's always been Nightmare on Elm Street, the first one.
That one's always freaked me out.
What's your favorite horror movie? - I don't have to tell you.
- You go, uh, classic universal monsters.
You want to see things with fangs, capes.
- Yes.
- Uh-- I am not pissing my pants over that.
Black and white, slow pacing, it's not scary.
I'm with him, man.
If you really want to scare people, you gotta give 'em a notion like this could happen.
And Frankenstein can't happen.
Neither can Freddy Krueger.
He's got you there on Freddy Krueger.
Some guy could put a glove on with knives and-- Okay, maybe not terrorize people in dreams, but-- But he molested kids.
That was their origin, was in reality, and that was terrifying.
Frankenstein threw a child in the lake, remember? But he was friendly to her at first.
Tell that to the parents.
Look at that.
That's fine stitching.
Awesome.
5 bucks.
- Thank you.
- No, thank you.
The stuff on his table-- I think he stole it.
I got a fish on the hook right here.
I got more over here if you wanna look at them.
- Don't go to his table.
- And they're better.
- Don't go to his table? - How you doing? Look at all of my beautiful items here.
This one I don't want to let go.
Retail price, 59.
99.
Can be yours for 20.
Don't buy his garbage.
But look at this stuff.
Way more reasonably priced.
Those? Those are only $1.
- Two of those.
- There you go.
That's what he does.
He tries to steal all my sales.
Tries to take bread out of my children's mouths.
Greedy capitalist.
Thank you.
See you later.
Thank you.
Dude, you suck at salesmanship.
We'll see.
I tried to make it fun, and I thought for sure that they would work together.
Mm-hmm.
Like, as a team.
He couldn't work with him.
Ming is neat.
He's a metrosexual.
This guy-- he's so sloppy.
Everything's haphazard.
He--they--they could-- it's like Oscar and Felix.
They can't work together.
You guys wanna buy some stuff over here? Nothing? Nothing? Nothing piques your interest? You had him.
You had him.
Let him go.
How you doing? - How much are these? - $1.
Look at that.
Cover print 20.
Do you happen to know if we're near an elementary school? He's not allowed to be within a thousand feet.
- How you doing? - Okay.
Look at these beautiful action figures here.
Still in their packaging.
Bread makers, like bun makers? - Bread makers? - What about-- you could put bread on this plate.
- You could.
- Buy it.
Look.
- Oh! - We don't care about money.
We just care about selling stuff.
We just want you to be happy.
- I know, great.
- We're loco with sales.
I'll wreck his whole table to prove how dedicated we are.
What the hell, man? You owe me $10 for that.
Well, you're down - 'Scuse me.
- Hey.
You don't do this to these people.
No? You don't destroy somebody else's things.
- Yeah, thank you.
- But I bought it.
- You leave him alone.
- I bought it.
- Didn't I buy it? - No.
No, you didn't.
No, you didn't.
If you bought it, you destroy it.
All right.
I want two plates.
Give him give him.
Give him.
You got change of a 20? No, no, no, no-- hey, hey, hey! - There we go, okay.
- That's fine.
That's fine.
You can do that if it's yours.
- Where's your table? - Right over here.
- I might come by later.
- You can come by.
If you destroy it, you pay for it.
All right.
I learned a valuable lesson today.
Yes.
- You all right? - I'm all right.
Thank you for standing up for me.
- All right.
- I appreciate it.
I'm not paying for those plates.
Gimme my 40 bucks back.
Give him his 40 bucks back.
Here, you can have 20.
I'm not paying for those plates.
Gimme the other 20.
I'm not giving it back.
You better keep a close eye on those plates, Ming.
Until I get that 20 back, they're at risk.
Wow.
There must be something pretty valuable in that bag.
Have you ever thought about, like, could you or would you ever give up everything you have to become a superhero? I don't know.
But there were times where I wanted to.
I was so into Batman that I'd wear that long leather coat, and I had the bat t-shirt under it and whatnot.
And I remember, like, I was dating this girl that worked at the pharmacy.
And I loved-- do you remember, uh, Neil Gaiman wrote a Black Orchid mini-series? And in it, Batman tells her, "go to Gotham.
Seek this man.
Give him this.
" And he gives her a card, and it just simply has the bat symbol on it.
So I'm dating this chick.
She had this car.
She had a little Toyota.
Under the windshield, I put one of those cards.
I made my own.
So she came out the store.
She goes to the windshield, lifts it up, sees this thing, flips it, and it says, "look up.
" And then she looked up, and I was standing on the roof of Bayshore Pharmacy In my long coat, in the night sky.
I'm backed by the moon and stuff.
And then it was so bad, 'cause I was like, "can you bring your car around so I can jump off? I gotta get off this roof.
" And what if she just threw the card away? Would you have been like, "whoa, whoa, whoa!" "I said look up! Batman needs you!" If you had Richie Rich money, would you dress differently? I would dress nicer, most definitely.
This guy wears $75 t-shirts.
And $200 jeans.
That's true.
You have a pair of $300 jeans? I'm wearing them right now.
How's your wife let you get away with buying $300 jeans? - They were a gift.
- Yeah, okay.
It changes a little bit.
But who would buy you a $300 pair of jeans? I did--I did a favor for somebody.
Some guy dressed like Richie Rich was like, "Hello, dear sir.
How would you like to earn some jeans?" "Ironically, by taking them off.
" Hey, how you doing? All right.
How you doing? - Welcome to Jay and Silent Bob's- -I'm Walter.
I've got two things you might be interested in.
Check this out, Ming.
Oh, yes.
This must be something pretty valuable in that bag.
Yeah.
That's a little extreme.
What was in it? What did he-- Well, what do you think would be in it? Like, what would be worthy a collectible? An Action #1, a Detective #27? Something of historical significance.
Hitler's brain? The first thing I've got here is a Dawn of the Dead British lobby card set released in June of 1980.
So obviously, they retitled it Zombies in Britain? Mm-hmm.
There's this, and then there's a Dawn of the Dead one-sheet.
You mean the movie poster.
Yes, it is.
Be a nice piece to have on our wall.
I think we can move it.
Let's get down to business.
- Oh, boy.
Okay.
- The bee's knees.
How much are we looking for for both of these? - Both? - How much are you looking for? Well This is a very rare set.
I was looking for 800 for the set.
- $800? - Yeah.
Looking about 200 for this.
Okay, so $1,000.
Unfortunatel I'm just not that well versed in movie memorabilia.
Um, would you have any objection to me making a call to a buddy of mine who has a better idea No, not at all.
About this kind of merchandise? - Not at all.
- You got a few minutes? Let me guess, this is the kind of situation that calls for Robert Bruce.
- Right on the money.
- I know you guys are like, "we call in Robert Bruce 'cause he's the expert.
" Really it's like, "we call in Robert Bruce "when he can deal with the whack jobs we don't want to deal with.
" I'm a pop culturist, is what I am.
- Okay.
- I specialize in collectibles.
Toys, comics.
As far as the poster goes, American posters, high-end is about $400-$450 or so.
But those are the high-end posters, this is not.
This was a folded poster that somebody rolled, which brings the condition way off.
It should be mounted and framed.
The odd thing is that it's an Australian version, it's not an American version.
Which is why it's here.
Did you hear that? - If--if someone's gonna buy a Dawn of the Dead poster, - they want an American poster.
- Right.
Being Australian, there's a lot of these things out there.
Sure.
I think retail would be $200.
- The retail.
- That's retail.
If I was gonna buy this, in the condition it's in now, I would probably pay half that.
On a good day.
You can say anything you want about Rob, but that guy knows the value of a collectible.
- It's a nice set.
- Mm-hmm.
You told the guys how much you thought it was worth? Uh, I told them I wanted $800 for it.
Yeah, I mean, the lobby cards are nice, but these things sell all the time.
I mean, you can find singles for $25 to $35 apiece.
I'm not so sure I agree with that, but No, no.
That's reality.
Okay.
I know the value of what I've seen, and this stuff isn't going to go down in value.
You may want to take a look, 'cause the market's changed a lot on these.
- Okay.
- So putting this set together, you're looking probably for about under $300.
No.
- And you're looking for 1,000, so I don't-- I don't even know how that's, like, in the same - Universe.
- General vicinity.
ThenI can't let it go for that much.
He laid it all out.
I mean, the way he negotiates, it's like watching a wolf hunt.
It's like watching a lion devour an elk.
A lion doesn't have to tiptoe around its prey.
A lion just takes it by the throat, rips it out, and then smiles at you while you're dying and bleeding.
All right, so Wish we could've did business, but - Thanks, Andrew.
- Thanks a lot.
- Thanks, Andrew.
- All right.
- Whoa, whoa, hold on.
- Thank you.
- Whew! Did you-- you could feel the machismo in the room there, man.
It was getting heated! You need to understand something.
That guy was not a novice.
Have you ever negotiated in front of your wife like that? I mean, that was a-- that was a turn on, wasn't it? - Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- I mean, it was just, like, I've never seen you in that mode.
Well, you know.
When I'm in doubt, call Rob Bruce.
- There you go.
- Right, even better.
No matter what the situation, Ming.
I've always maintained if I thought I could convert Rob Bruce to become part of our team, - I would.
- You would.
He's kind of like the fifth Beatle, if you will.
In a just world, all the stuff he knows about the obscure would get him laid.
Like, that would be something that women would find attractive.
Like, "you know a lot about stuff" "nobody likes or cares about.
I need to be with you.
" Hello, ma'am.
How are you doing? How much are these? For those? Those are $2 each.
Now what, Ming? Go home? Not until everything's off the table.
The rest of my table? Yours for the low, low price of 10 bucks.
- Done.
- Beautiful.
I'm even gonna put it in a box for you.
Thank you, bro.
I heard that's the going price for a table.
Done.
Fire sale.
Guess what, Mike.
- Coming with me? - We're going home.
- Here's your dog.
- Oh, thank you.
Mmm, hot dogs are for closers.
You still have a ton of crap.
$1 for the comics.
$1.
Nothing? You know what the problem is, Ming? You have the stank of desperation hanging all around you.
- Hey, come here, please! - Yeah, it's really sad.
I mean, honestly, doesn't this whole place have that stank? I know, that's the killer.
The whole place reeks of desperation, yet, somehow, you stand out.
I'm gonna take the chair, all right? Bye-bye, douche bag! Hey, I'm still open.
Got great stuff here.
I have this Thor poster.
It's absolutely gorgeous.
I feel myself getting nerdier by the minute.
How'd you guys do? We did all right.
- How much did you make? - I made $54.
- Bry? - I made 42.
All right, well, where's Ming? Great deals.
Great steals.
I'm still open.
Two-for-one! Two-for-one! $1 for the comic.
$1.
Ming, you're still here, huh? Still here.
Whole table, Rob.
- How much? - 25 for everything.
How about 20? The omnipresent Rob Bruce was at the flea market as well.
That doesn't surprise me.
Of course, Rob Bruce was there.
It's New Jersey and there are collectibles.
Rob Bruce is there.
- How about, uh, 22? - Come on, Rob, 25.
- $22.
- You know--you know-- you know you can get way more than this.
- 23.
- 22.
Come on, you're not even gonna give me 23? - 23.
- All right.
Deal.
$23.
And I even got a box for you.
Cool.
Dude, you know what you should do from now on? Whenever you answer the phone, give it the Christian Bale Batman voice.
Comics.
Why does he growl? Did you ever figure that out? It's because he's trying to be intimidating.
If you got a guy dressed in a costume and he's growling in your face, you're more apt to listen to what he's saying.
Definitely.
Give me a ham and swiss on rye.
I might put a little bit more ham on your sandwich - if I was behind the counter.
- Really? Yeah, "this guy's a lunatic, I might want to" make sure he's happy with his sandwich.
" Knowing that, man, it doesn't have to stop there.
Try it with your girl.
Oh, that's a good idea! She's like, "we can go to second base.
" And I was like, "I was thinking third.
" And then she'll just do it.
It would hurt your voice though.
I can hardly talk.
That's why you're not Batman.
That's why you're hanging out in a comic book store.
- Hey, man, how you doing? - I'm all right, how's it going? - Good, my name's Walt.
- I'm Andrew.
Bryan.
Hey, Bryan.
- You looking to sell today? - Yeah, for sure.
I have this-- this, uh, Thor poster.
They came out with a whole series of these.
There was one with the Fantastic Four, and Silver Surfer, and Doctor Doom.
I've seen the Doctor Doom and the Silver Surfer one before.
This is the only time that I've ever seen this.
That's how Kirby's work should be presented.
- It's just coming at you.
- In a poster-sized panel.
I mean, it's absolutely gorgeous.
I feel myself getting nerdier by the minute.
Jack "the king" Kirby was the artist that defined the look of a lot of the characters that you know.
The Fantastic Four, Spider-man, The Incredible Hulk.
Explain "Kirby dots.
" It's just black dots portrayed on a page to convey energy, space.
It was just, like, this weird touch that he would throw into things that became kind of his signature, and not just in his work, but in comics kind of in general.
Like, he put a stamp on storytelling.
Visual storytelling has been with us longer than we've had words.
They can go back and find cave drawings.
"Here's a big buffalo.
We all attacked it with many arrows.
" And stuff like that.
It'd be interesting to find a cave drawing with some Kirby dots around it.
Oh, my g-- right? Could you imagine? "He's a fraud!" "Yet another white man stole from the native Americans!" Like most do.
All right, is that it today? No, I have Tomb of Dracula #10, which is the first appearance of Blade, from the Wesley Snipes movies.
I mean, Wesley Snipes, I thought he played a perfect Blade.
They should've given him a pass with the tax stuff for it.
So how come you're moving this? I recently purchased a house and, you know, trying to make some repairs and this and that.
So I'm hoping that whatever I can get from-- from this stuff can be added to the fund.
Okay, so how much you want for the poster? I'm looking for - Buck and a quarter, huh? - Yep.
Um.
Now's the moment, dude.
The voice.
- What's that? - Use the voice on him.
I don't know if I can go that high.
Okay.
It's working! Um, if I were to take the Tomb of Dracula and the Thor poster today, what could you do me for those two? I'd say$400? So you think this is worth $300? Um, it's also signed by Gene Colan, who was the cover artist and the artist who did - the inside of the book.
- Yeah.
The fact that it's signed doesn't do anything, you feel, to the value? Um It's not authenticated.
When I sell it to somebody in the store, I'm gonna have to go in there saying, - "look, it's signed" - Sure.
"I think it's by Gene Colan.
" Yes, it is.
And then they'll believe it.
There's no way to really tell if that's a real-deal signature.
I don't want to put your reputation on the line or the Stash's reputation on the line of selling bogus signatured items.
Do people get tight if you're like, "I'm sorry, man," like, the autograph doesn't help in my case, it kinda hurts.
" Do they get, like, "hey, what are you, crazy?" Yeah, they almost get like "what are you insinuating? I'm some sort of, uh, crook or I'm aShim-sham man?" Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Nobody wants to be a shim-sham man.
How about 160 for The Tomb of Dracula, first appearance of Blade, and the Kirby Thor poster? - 160.
- Cash, right now, done.
I think I'm gonna hold on to Tomb of Dracula and for sure 100 bucks for the Thor poster, it's yours.
Um, okay, I wanted both though.
Um175 for both.
- I can't--I just-- - Okay.
I don't think I'm ready to sell this yet.
Okay.
How about the poster? $75 for the poster.
All right, $75 it is.
- Got yourself a deal.
- All right.
Let me ask you something.
Do people ever come in here to buy anything? Feels like no.
Thank you.
All right.
Take it easy.
- For sure, man.
- All right.
That is awesome.
Hey! Hot dogs are for closers.
Right, douche bags? Bottom line, Mike made 54, Brian made 42.
What did Ming bring in today? All right, let's count it up here.
Wow, he put you to shame.
Well, he made an extra $2 by staying an extra five hours.
If that's winning, I'm okay.
I think it's fine to just Give the man - His just due.
- You did well, man.
Showed up early, you stayed late.
Plus you get to stick a fat shiny hotdog in your mouth.
Go on, take another bite of your victory, wiener Ming.
Don't let him take it away.
You earned every bite.
Every inch that goes down your throat.
I guess that's gonna do it for this week.
On Comic Book Men.
I'm Kevin Smith Brian Johnson, Walt Flanagan, Ming Chan, - and Michael Zapzack.
- Don't stop believing.
He watches the kid's parents get killed.
He immediately scrambles out there.
He's like, "you want to live with me?" Is that the way it went? - No.
- No.
Actually-- he does a little private-eying.
- Okay.
- He goes and checks the ropes.
He's like, "acid on the ropes.
" - Right, of course.
- "This was murder.
" Mm-hmm.
So he goes and solves the murder, but he also sees himself in Dick.
- Grayson.
- Oh, okay.
He's a multi-billionaire, man.
It's like if Donald Trump today was like, "I want a ten-year-old boy, pronto!" - He has a ten-year-old boy.
- He's got it there.
It's there yesterday.
One of the celebrity apprentices is on it like that.
All right, imagine that.
Getting adopted by a billionaire.
I don't care what I had to do.
I-I would dress up like a ten-year-old boy.
Have a giant lollipop, pinwheel hat.
Kinda like you, man.
Hello, and welcome to Comic Book Men.
I'm Kevin Smith.
Bryan Johnson.
- Walt Flanagan.
- Ming Chen.
And Michael Zapcic.
If you've ever listened to this show, you know that anytime I'm anywhere near the motherland, uh, my home and native land, New Jersey, I love to sit down with my fellow podcasters-- the meat in the sandwich here, if you will, Walt runs the Secret Stash, and he's kept it alive in an economy where comic book stores are failing left and right.
Oh, my God.
Get a room.
As long as I've known Walter, my friend Bryan Johnson here has known Walter much longer.
They go back to even grade school.
Bryan, one of the funniest people in the world, he's here at the Stash all the time.
Doesn't quite work here, though.
No.
What do you do here all the time? You guys must have, in your youth, read comics with an eye towards the hot superheroines.
Who was your dream heroine? My favorite has always been Caitlin Fairchild, Gen 13.
You couldn't handle that.
Oh, I could definitely handle that.
How dare you? He's ready to flip the table.
What a moronic answer! - Zap? - I'm a Catwoman guy.
- Are you really? - I am.
I love Catwoman.
Which version of Catwoman? Uh, goggles' Catwoman.
Goggles Paisano Catwoman, yeah.
- Really? - I like the purple-- purple dress Catwoman for me.
With the slit.
With the little cape.
Slit up to the thigh.
And she had the cat o' nine tails.
- Oh, yeah? - Uh-huh.
No.
I'm going with goggles.
I'd go, uh, Zatanna, chick magician.
She wears a little tuxedo and fishnets.
- Right.
- She's already in fishnets.
She's half-undressed already.
And she's magical.
So if you're a terrible lay, she could be like, "I forgot.
" - Hey, how's it going? - Hey, how you doing? We have a toy store down by the shore, and we got a bunch of comic books in, - which we don't really mess with.
- Okay.
I was hoping that you could take a look at them.
- I'd be happy to.
- Cool.
Hey, Walt! I just brought some stuff that I thought would be key.
Wow.
Look at that.
Whoa.
Hypodermic needle.
Have you ever seen this? You know what? I've only heard about this book.
Back in the '40s, it wasn't as scandalous, I don't think, to put a needle on the cover as it came to be in the '60s and '70s.
There was no code back then, right? No code.
And a hypodermic needle, I guess, wasn't as synonymous with Drugs? Illicit activities as it is today.
At a certain point, they were banned.
Really? D.
C.
tackled heroin, remember? With Green Arrow discovering his kid's sidekick, speedy, was sitting there shooting up.
Still shocking to this day when you see Speedy shoving that needle into his arm, and then you see Green Arrow in the background, you know, shocked.
- Heartbroken.
- Heartbroken.
And Green Lantern, you know-- - has to hold him back.
- Yeah.
What do you think he's holding him back from? Like, "I must help him!" Or "I'll beat him" within an inch of his life!" 'Cause it was the '70s, and you could get away with that.
You don't know what Green Arrow's gonna do.
If you remember, in that comic, he smacked him around.
- Did he really? - Yeah, he slapped him.
Well, how old was Speedy at this point? Speedy was 17.
But Speedy is not Green Arrow's son.
He's just his sidekick, the way Robin is not related to Batman.
Are you allowed to slap some sense into him? - Of course.
- He's not your kid.
That's like walking up to somebody else's kid and-- - are you allowed to bring Robin in to fight The Penguin and The Joker? Good point.
I was wondering if you could give me some kind of value or what we're talking about here.
In the condition it is, But I think I couldn't make a profit on it.
It just seems like it's-- it's the condition that hurts it so much.
Yeah.
I actually have one more Batman item I brought.
This I thought was really, really unique.
Oh, ho, ho.
Whoa.
Bob Kane, 1970.
The creator of Batman.
This is amazing.
How did you get this? This came in with this collection.
The collector who got this apparently was eating in a place that Kane was eating in New York.
And, uh, he asked him if he would do a quick sketch, and Bob did it for him.
In 1970.
Bob Kane, no longer with us.
This is a one-of-a-kind.
I mean, this has gotta be priceless.
It was the classic Kane, you know.
Grinning ear to ear.
Happy to be fighting crime.
Happy to be fighting crime.
- Batman used to be happy? - Yeah.
At least, that was the Bob Kane.
And every time he drew Batman, he had, like, this giant smile, and Robin too.
That would be off-putting, though.
Like, you're mugging somebody, and then someone dressed like the Batman shows up, but he's smiling.
Yeah, that's what I'm saying.
Even with those smiles, behind it, there's still something spooky and eerie about it.
Unnerving, like, "why are you smiling at me? Stop it.
" And he's-- still, you talking about Batman and Robin.
I mean, I think it's Santa Claus, Michael Jackson, Batman, and then Robin are the most recognized faces on the earth.
- Robin? - Yeah.
I think so.
Batman and Robin together.
Jesus nowhere on that list.
It looks like whatever Kane drew this on, there looks to be-- you can see some words coming through the other side.
Like, it almost looks like a script or a document of some kind, something typed.
I've always been curious what was under there, but I was always worried it was gonna diminish the value of the piece by opening it.
That's a concern, but it doesn't look like it was a professionally framed piece.
Right, yeah.
It looks like you could take the back out easily and open it up.
You don't know what this piece of paper could be.
It could be, like, maybe he was working on another character.
I have no idea, man.
Maybe some new character maybe he never got a chance to do.
It could be anything.
So let's check it out and see what we got.
On the front, the Bob Kane drawing.
On the back, national treasure! Yes, and that's what I was going for.
Whatever's on the back of this could be so huge, it could make this sketch even jump up to $100,000.
Right.
He was like, "let's crack it open.
" He's had it all this time, and he's just like, "you know--" He talked him into it.
Silver-tongued devil, you.
You should've been like, "you know what? Take your pants off, too.
" Just see how far you could get it going.
I was getting woozy and sweaty, 'cause I'm like, "I don't even know what's gonna be on the other side of this.
" And as he fumbles with the, uh--with the-- - we're still talking-- - Frame.
We are still talking about the comic book page now, right? Actually, I was talking about the pants.
You want me to get my white gloves? Nah, but you gotta figure, if Bob touched it, we can touch it.
- All right.
- Let's check it out, man.
- Be careful.
- Okay.
Wow, man.
See what we got here.
- Whew.
Here we go.
- Here we go.
Uh, I don't know what that is.
You guys wanna-- It's a press release.
Yeah, for some sort of, uh, gall--art gallery that was having a showing of some sort of paintings.
It could've been something that he had on him.
He probably did get stuff like this all the time.
You know, being-- - an artist.
- Yeah, Bob Kane.
Was the guy let down? It was a real, like, Capone vault moment.
We're like, "what's gonna be behind there?" What's on it?" And then we open it up, and it's just like, eh.
So not a big deal, but I wanted to know.
You know, the last thing you want to do is end up not realizing what you had.
- Right, right, right.
- Right.
So how much do you actually think this would be worth? I couldn't even begin to, uh, put a value on this.
I mean, it's like finding a signature of George Washington or something.
I wouldn't take less than 10 grand for it.
Man, you guys are blowing me away.
I've been looking at a new Camaro.
It's absolutely amazing.
I would bring this to an auction house.
Christie's heritage.
I don't know what you traded for it, but it looks like-- it looks like you made out.
Thanks, guys.
Seriously, thanks a lot.
Thank you very much.
Thanks for bringing them in.
- Take it light, fellas.
- Be well.
Take care, man.
Wow.
That's a hell of an autograph.
Doesn't get much rarer than that.
So the store looks less cluttered than it has in recent memory.
It was getting a little, uh, dicey there for a while.
A store remains open as long as we have, you start to accumulate stuff.
It was starting to look like Kevin Spacey's library in Se7en.
Just--when they broke into his room of weird collections, like, "we found - Ming.
- What's going on? Can you tell me why this stuff is just piled everywhere? - It's Mike.
- Mike! - What's up, Walt? - Hey.
Do you know where these Moon-- like, all these copies of Moon Knight came from? These are--are freebies.
- They were free? - Yep.
He told me you had bought 'em.
How in the hell did I buy them? You brought them up here.
Ming, you look like a donkey wearing a straw hat.
What does that mean? Stuff is coming up from downstairs, like The Blob.
We gotta figure out a way to move it.
All right, let's do it.
Let's find a way.
I say we just bring it to Collingswood then.
For those who have never been to a flea market, you're missing out.
It's the great American garage sale.
But if you've never been to the Collingswood Auction flea market, and you're in New Jersey, you are missing out on a cross-section of the fabric that makes up the United States of America.
You take the pulse of America right there.
You're not kidding, man.
Never mind New York and L.
A.
The pulse is the Collingswood market.
I was thinking maybe a little competition between you, Mike, and Ming.
- All right.
- Winner gets what? What do you need, Ming? What's the carrot on the stick I can dangle in front of your nose? Can I have Mike's job? No, you don't go after a man's job.
That's second only to going after his wife.
Piece of [Bleep.]
.
Here's what I'm thinking then.
Whoever can sell the most of this stuff, I'll give them two weekends off in a row.
All right.
Bryan, you got any interest in getting in on this? If it means Ming losing something he loves, I'm totally in.
I said, divvy it up between you three.
Mike, you take Ming, you take Bryan, you take Get yourselves a table each.
Sell all your stuff.
Whoever brings home the most money for their stuff-- - Right.
- Is the winner.
Look who's here.
Woo-hoo! Should've known you'd be early, Ming.
Where's all your money you made? It's in my pocket.
You didn't make [Bleep.]
.
You know it.
You told us to be there at 8:00.
You got there at 7:00 to try and cut out-- You set us up for failure.
Apple polisher, that's what you are.
"I'm gonna show Walt I'm the best.
" But on a team, there's always gonna be that one person whose nose is brown.
- Yes.
Has to be.
- There has to be, or else the team is worthless.
- Yeah.
- And we know we got that guy.
And I cherish that nose, and I want you to keep it right where it's at and never remove it.
Firmly planted between Walt's cheeks.
How much is this stuff, anyway? I don't know.
You make up the prices.
Christmas is coming up, dude.
Somebody in your life must need a dancing Bart.
Stains all over him.
Ming, what the hell? That's not my-- that's your problem.
It's not my problem.
What are you doing? Let the competition begin.
This is, like, the Ferrari of the collecting world.
I love the Six Million Dollar man so much.
It's freaking me out a little bit.
So, Bryan, what's new? Mostly I just stand here and watch my life pass before me.
- With me.
- Mm-hmm.
Actually, that's what I do here.
I watch your life pass by.
- Hey.
- Hey, how you doing? - Doing pretty good.
- Oh.
I have brought some things into your shop you might have an interest in.
- Toys.
- Yeah.
I have some Megos here.
Ooh.
I got a Robin.
- I got a circle suit Spider-man.
- Very cool.
And, uh, well, this is not exactly a Mego, but this is the, uh, Six Million Dollar Man.
Oh, this is beautiful.
You know what that is? Of course I do.
The telescopic sight.
That's the bionic eye.
- Very nice.
- Agh! Walter.
Got some stuff you need to see.
Six Million Dollar Man.
I mean, how big was that in our childhood? The Six Million Dollar Man was kind of like a superhero.
He had strength.
He could run really fast.
And he was always fighting crime, and it was badass, because that was the closest thing to a comic book show on TV at that point.
Yep.
These are yours? Yes, these are from my collection.
I love the Six Million Dollar Man so much.
From the day I was born till about age 15, my most vivid memory is-- - please say [Bleep.]
ing a girl, please.
Please say-- I said till I was 15.
Okay.
My most cherished memory as a child is sitting down in front of the TV and watching Steve Austin rip off Bigfoot's arm.
Nothing else topped that.
You built your life around this episode because finally, this dude was gonna fight something of maybe equal strength, because you're the Bionic Man.
And nobody else is bionic.
Like, every episode could just end with You know, justice.
But if you're fighting Bigfoot, there's a chance they could have a throwdown.
And then in the midst of this episode, doesn't he pull off Bigfoot's arm, and it's revealed that Bigfoot is also bionic? Yeah, I mean-- Aren't you supposed to say, "spoiler alert," when you say stuff like that? I guess.
I think there's a 25-year moratorium, though.
I had all three of these dolls as a child, Bry.
Are those high-ticket items, Walt? This is no cheap stuff? Oh, this is not cheap stuff, Bry.
This is like the Ferraris of the collecting world.
You could probably really win your kid's respect if you had this in your collection.
All my daughter's friends come over, and I'm like, "come in.
Look.
Six Million Dollar Man.
" "Come on.
Come on, girls.
Walt wants to talk about dolls again.
" What would you think would be a fair price? Could you still look through the back of the box - You can.
- To see through Steve's eye? You can.
Uh, the plastic in the window was still crisp? It was still nice? - It is.
- All right.
- 200? - Less.
Get outta here.
So what are you looking for for the Six Million Dollar Man? For you guys, I can do, uh, if you wanted him, 250.
I don't want to insult you or beat you up.
But, um, is there any way you could take 150? I honestly could not.
It's an unfortunate thing, but I like you.
And because I like you, you know, um, I could do this one here for 200, if you want.
Would you do 175? Cash? If you wanna do 185, it's yours.
You can have it in here.
Other than that, I-- that is the absolute, like-- What if I gave you guys the extra 10 bucks? - Would you do that? - You'd do that? I'll kick in the extra ten, yeah.
You'd do that? - 185.
- 185.
I get to look through his eye.
That's all I ask.
You can look through the eye as many times as you want.
I'm a part owner.
And I can't wait to go tell my girlfriend.
Great deals here.
Action figures, comics.
You like wearing shirts? - $3? - $3 for that.
Come on.
All right.
Junior makes a purchase.
Everything 5 bucks.
Thanks a lot, man.
Sure thing.
Thank you.
- I'll be back.
We'll be here.
You know, these retail for $50.
- How much it is? - 10 bucks.
All right, I'll take it.
Thank you very much.
Ming, I'm breaking a sweat over here.
Don't bother me.
I'm making a sale.
X-Men: Evolution Colossus, beautiful, beautiful piece.
Card's a little bent, but it's still a good price.
Ringle, ringle.
Coins as they jingle.
Mike, what do you got so far? About 40.
Bryan? Think I've made, like, Let's see it.
I'm not just gonna flash that kind of cash around here.
I'm catching up to you.
All right.
Even though you gave me the crap, I'm still gonna move it.
You have an empty cart.
You want to fill it up with some good stuff? Fill it up with some good stuff.
- Oh, sure.
- Discounted toys.
Let me see what you have.
Discounted, stained-up, androgynous Bart.
Good stuff.
He went back into the world of sales, actually dealing with the public.
And not only did you deal with the public, but you dealt with the Collingswood public.
- Yeah.
- What was that like? It was a nightmare.
I can't imagine this being my life.
Why? You don't see it as the magical Asgardian place like we see it? Like you cross a rainbow bridge to a world of goods? You know, it's probably the customers.
It's prob--it comes down to I just don't want to deal with people, you know? You look like a woman with taste, right? Let me intro-- - What? - Don't do that.
You're a collector of fine art? I got fine art right here.
What? There's a good hour where I'm like, "wow, this is awesome.
" Look at all this stuff.
" And then after that, I'm like, "oh, my God, look at these people.
" Like, the reason they're not in the mall is because they're not allowed in the mall.
I'm making a sale over here.
Let me come back, but then-- Oh, you're not coming back.
They never come back.
Wow.
Must be something pretty valuable in that bag.
Mike, how was your weekend? It was good, thanks, Ming.
Cooked dinner for the family.
We watched Rango.
Rango, the movie Rango? No, just some dude in our neighborhood's named Rango.
So we just followed him around for a couple of hours.
What are you talking about? Hi.
Uh, hi.
- Lovely child.
- Thank you.
I'm actually looking to sell him.
- Uh.
- Is that life-sized? Yes, it's considered life-sized.
Okay, why you looking to sell it? Well, I'm starting up my own little business of making my own dolls.
I have a couple of other Chuckys, so, um, I think maybe I could part with one.
Maybe.
- Okay.
- It's creepy.
It's freaking me out a little bit.
You know who Chucky was named after? - Charles Manson? - That's right.
His full name in the movie was, uh, Charles-- - Lee Ray.
- Charles Lee Ray.
So Charles for Charles Manson, Lee for Lee Harvey oswald, and Ray for James Earl Ray.
Okay.
They tried to make it a somewhat serious horror.
I don't think it was ever treated as "serious" horror, a little doll running around.
You collect a lot of dolls? - Yeah.
- Yeah? Yeah, a lot.
Who manufactured the doll? It doesn't look like a McFarlane.
No, Spencer's was putting them out.
- Spencer's, huh? - Yes.
McFarlane may be a little bit more detail-oriented, little bit harder to come by.
Do you have the box, by any chance? No.
Rule of thumb, always keep the box, especially if there's something you want to resell.
Well, he's part of the family, you know.
We don't keep family members in boxes usually.
You don't sell family members either, though.
Well, not in this day and age.
What was really weird was that she almost treated the doll like it was a living, breathing person.
Like--or it was like a child to her.
It was really strange.
This was not an-- a teenager.
But she's walking around in a corset with a doll tucked under her arm that she thinks is real.
Yes.
Why did you not immediately throw a butterfly net over her and haul her off? It's not really our job to do that, is it? It's everybody's job to clean up the streets.
You can't just be like, "oh, we're busy.
We're at work.
We're at our nine-to-fivers.
" But our first priority is to Stash.
Can we make money off the mentally ill? What are you looking to get today for the Chucky doll? I was thinking, like, I could probably do - 100? - Yeah.
No, I can't do it.
I can't.
Not for 100.
Nope.
Sure? I don't even know if I could do it for 500.
I mean, if you don't want to buy him-- Yeah, um, unfortunately, on this piece, that's probably the best that we're gonna be able to offer you today is 100.
Ugh.
Well, he's happy to come home with me, so.
I bet he is.
I feel bad.
Like, I think he's, like, sad.
Yeah, aww.
- Thank you for coming in.
- Okay.
- Thank you for showing us.
- Thank you, yeah.
Bye-bye.
Say, "bye.
" Bye.
- Bye, Chucky.
- Later, Chuck.
That was scary.
My favorite horror flick of all time is The Shining because the same image that scared me when I was ten still scares me today, kid's on a big wheel, going along the carpet.
Turns a corner.
There are those twin girls, the most terrifying image ever captured on film.
Still to this day, when that moment happens, I wet myself just a little.
A little comes out, you know, and I have to excuse myself.
What about you, Ming? Your favorite horror movie? Mine's always been Nightmare on Elm Street, the first one.
That one's always freaked me out.
What's your favorite horror movie? - I don't have to tell you.
- You go, uh, classic universal monsters.
You want to see things with fangs, capes.
- Yes.
- Uh-- I am not pissing my pants over that.
Black and white, slow pacing, it's not scary.
I'm with him, man.
If you really want to scare people, you gotta give 'em a notion like this could happen.
And Frankenstein can't happen.
Neither can Freddy Krueger.
He's got you there on Freddy Krueger.
Some guy could put a glove on with knives and-- Okay, maybe not terrorize people in dreams, but-- But he molested kids.
That was their origin, was in reality, and that was terrifying.
Frankenstein threw a child in the lake, remember? But he was friendly to her at first.
Tell that to the parents.
Look at that.
That's fine stitching.
Awesome.
5 bucks.
- Thank you.
- No, thank you.
The stuff on his table-- I think he stole it.
I got a fish on the hook right here.
I got more over here if you wanna look at them.
- Don't go to his table.
- And they're better.
- Don't go to his table? - How you doing? Look at all of my beautiful items here.
This one I don't want to let go.
Retail price, 59.
99.
Can be yours for 20.
Don't buy his garbage.
But look at this stuff.
Way more reasonably priced.
Those? Those are only $1.
- Two of those.
- There you go.
That's what he does.
He tries to steal all my sales.
Tries to take bread out of my children's mouths.
Greedy capitalist.
Thank you.
See you later.
Thank you.
Dude, you suck at salesmanship.
We'll see.
I tried to make it fun, and I thought for sure that they would work together.
Mm-hmm.
Like, as a team.
He couldn't work with him.
Ming is neat.
He's a metrosexual.
This guy-- he's so sloppy.
Everything's haphazard.
He--they--they could-- it's like Oscar and Felix.
They can't work together.
You guys wanna buy some stuff over here? Nothing? Nothing? Nothing piques your interest? You had him.
You had him.
Let him go.
How you doing? - How much are these? - $1.
Look at that.
Cover print 20.
Do you happen to know if we're near an elementary school? He's not allowed to be within a thousand feet.
- How you doing? - Okay.
Look at these beautiful action figures here.
Still in their packaging.
Bread makers, like bun makers? - Bread makers? - What about-- you could put bread on this plate.
- You could.
- Buy it.
Look.
- Oh! - We don't care about money.
We just care about selling stuff.
We just want you to be happy.
- I know, great.
- We're loco with sales.
I'll wreck his whole table to prove how dedicated we are.
What the hell, man? You owe me $10 for that.
Well, you're down - 'Scuse me.
- Hey.
You don't do this to these people.
No? You don't destroy somebody else's things.
- Yeah, thank you.
- But I bought it.
- You leave him alone.
- I bought it.
- Didn't I buy it? - No.
No, you didn't.
No, you didn't.
If you bought it, you destroy it.
All right.
I want two plates.
Give him give him.
Give him.
You got change of a 20? No, no, no, no-- hey, hey, hey! - There we go, okay.
- That's fine.
That's fine.
You can do that if it's yours.
- Where's your table? - Right over here.
- I might come by later.
- You can come by.
If you destroy it, you pay for it.
All right.
I learned a valuable lesson today.
Yes.
- You all right? - I'm all right.
Thank you for standing up for me.
- All right.
- I appreciate it.
I'm not paying for those plates.
Gimme my 40 bucks back.
Give him his 40 bucks back.
Here, you can have 20.
I'm not paying for those plates.
Gimme the other 20.
I'm not giving it back.
You better keep a close eye on those plates, Ming.
Until I get that 20 back, they're at risk.
Wow.
There must be something pretty valuable in that bag.
Have you ever thought about, like, could you or would you ever give up everything you have to become a superhero? I don't know.
But there were times where I wanted to.
I was so into Batman that I'd wear that long leather coat, and I had the bat t-shirt under it and whatnot.
And I remember, like, I was dating this girl that worked at the pharmacy.
And I loved-- do you remember, uh, Neil Gaiman wrote a Black Orchid mini-series? And in it, Batman tells her, "go to Gotham.
Seek this man.
Give him this.
" And he gives her a card, and it just simply has the bat symbol on it.
So I'm dating this chick.
She had this car.
She had a little Toyota.
Under the windshield, I put one of those cards.
I made my own.
So she came out the store.
She goes to the windshield, lifts it up, sees this thing, flips it, and it says, "look up.
" And then she looked up, and I was standing on the roof of Bayshore Pharmacy In my long coat, in the night sky.
I'm backed by the moon and stuff.
And then it was so bad, 'cause I was like, "can you bring your car around so I can jump off? I gotta get off this roof.
" And what if she just threw the card away? Would you have been like, "whoa, whoa, whoa!" "I said look up! Batman needs you!" If you had Richie Rich money, would you dress differently? I would dress nicer, most definitely.
This guy wears $75 t-shirts.
And $200 jeans.
That's true.
You have a pair of $300 jeans? I'm wearing them right now.
How's your wife let you get away with buying $300 jeans? - They were a gift.
- Yeah, okay.
It changes a little bit.
But who would buy you a $300 pair of jeans? I did--I did a favor for somebody.
Some guy dressed like Richie Rich was like, "Hello, dear sir.
How would you like to earn some jeans?" "Ironically, by taking them off.
" Hey, how you doing? All right.
How you doing? - Welcome to Jay and Silent Bob's- -I'm Walter.
I've got two things you might be interested in.
Check this out, Ming.
Oh, yes.
This must be something pretty valuable in that bag.
Yeah.
That's a little extreme.
What was in it? What did he-- Well, what do you think would be in it? Like, what would be worthy a collectible? An Action #1, a Detective #27? Something of historical significance.
Hitler's brain? The first thing I've got here is a Dawn of the Dead British lobby card set released in June of 1980.
So obviously, they retitled it Zombies in Britain? Mm-hmm.
There's this, and then there's a Dawn of the Dead one-sheet.
You mean the movie poster.
Yes, it is.
Be a nice piece to have on our wall.
I think we can move it.
Let's get down to business.
- Oh, boy.
Okay.
- The bee's knees.
How much are we looking for for both of these? - Both? - How much are you looking for? Well This is a very rare set.
I was looking for 800 for the set.
- $800? - Yeah.
Looking about 200 for this.
Okay, so $1,000.
Unfortunatel I'm just not that well versed in movie memorabilia.
Um, would you have any objection to me making a call to a buddy of mine who has a better idea No, not at all.
About this kind of merchandise? - Not at all.
- You got a few minutes? Let me guess, this is the kind of situation that calls for Robert Bruce.
- Right on the money.
- I know you guys are like, "we call in Robert Bruce 'cause he's the expert.
" Really it's like, "we call in Robert Bruce "when he can deal with the whack jobs we don't want to deal with.
" I'm a pop culturist, is what I am.
- Okay.
- I specialize in collectibles.
Toys, comics.
As far as the poster goes, American posters, high-end is about $400-$450 or so.
But those are the high-end posters, this is not.
This was a folded poster that somebody rolled, which brings the condition way off.
It should be mounted and framed.
The odd thing is that it's an Australian version, it's not an American version.
Which is why it's here.
Did you hear that? - If--if someone's gonna buy a Dawn of the Dead poster, - they want an American poster.
- Right.
Being Australian, there's a lot of these things out there.
Sure.
I think retail would be $200.
- The retail.
- That's retail.
If I was gonna buy this, in the condition it's in now, I would probably pay half that.
On a good day.
You can say anything you want about Rob, but that guy knows the value of a collectible.
- It's a nice set.
- Mm-hmm.
You told the guys how much you thought it was worth? Uh, I told them I wanted $800 for it.
Yeah, I mean, the lobby cards are nice, but these things sell all the time.
I mean, you can find singles for $25 to $35 apiece.
I'm not so sure I agree with that, but No, no.
That's reality.
Okay.
I know the value of what I've seen, and this stuff isn't going to go down in value.
You may want to take a look, 'cause the market's changed a lot on these.
- Okay.
- So putting this set together, you're looking probably for about under $300.
No.
- And you're looking for 1,000, so I don't-- I don't even know how that's, like, in the same - Universe.
- General vicinity.
ThenI can't let it go for that much.
He laid it all out.
I mean, the way he negotiates, it's like watching a wolf hunt.
It's like watching a lion devour an elk.
A lion doesn't have to tiptoe around its prey.
A lion just takes it by the throat, rips it out, and then smiles at you while you're dying and bleeding.
All right, so Wish we could've did business, but - Thanks, Andrew.
- Thanks a lot.
- Thanks, Andrew.
- All right.
- Whoa, whoa, hold on.
- Thank you.
- Whew! Did you-- you could feel the machismo in the room there, man.
It was getting heated! You need to understand something.
That guy was not a novice.
Have you ever negotiated in front of your wife like that? I mean, that was a-- that was a turn on, wasn't it? - Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- I mean, it was just, like, I've never seen you in that mode.
Well, you know.
When I'm in doubt, call Rob Bruce.
- There you go.
- Right, even better.
No matter what the situation, Ming.
I've always maintained if I thought I could convert Rob Bruce to become part of our team, - I would.
- You would.
He's kind of like the fifth Beatle, if you will.
In a just world, all the stuff he knows about the obscure would get him laid.
Like, that would be something that women would find attractive.
Like, "you know a lot about stuff" "nobody likes or cares about.
I need to be with you.
" Hello, ma'am.
How are you doing? How much are these? For those? Those are $2 each.
Now what, Ming? Go home? Not until everything's off the table.
The rest of my table? Yours for the low, low price of 10 bucks.
- Done.
- Beautiful.
I'm even gonna put it in a box for you.
Thank you, bro.
I heard that's the going price for a table.
Done.
Fire sale.
Guess what, Mike.
- Coming with me? - We're going home.
- Here's your dog.
- Oh, thank you.
Mmm, hot dogs are for closers.
You still have a ton of crap.
$1 for the comics.
$1.
Nothing? You know what the problem is, Ming? You have the stank of desperation hanging all around you.
- Hey, come here, please! - Yeah, it's really sad.
I mean, honestly, doesn't this whole place have that stank? I know, that's the killer.
The whole place reeks of desperation, yet, somehow, you stand out.
I'm gonna take the chair, all right? Bye-bye, douche bag! Hey, I'm still open.
Got great stuff here.
I have this Thor poster.
It's absolutely gorgeous.
I feel myself getting nerdier by the minute.
How'd you guys do? We did all right.
- How much did you make? - I made $54.
- Bry? - I made 42.
All right, well, where's Ming? Great deals.
Great steals.
I'm still open.
Two-for-one! Two-for-one! $1 for the comic.
$1.
Ming, you're still here, huh? Still here.
Whole table, Rob.
- How much? - 25 for everything.
How about 20? The omnipresent Rob Bruce was at the flea market as well.
That doesn't surprise me.
Of course, Rob Bruce was there.
It's New Jersey and there are collectibles.
Rob Bruce is there.
- How about, uh, 22? - Come on, Rob, 25.
- $22.
- You know--you know-- you know you can get way more than this.
- 23.
- 22.
Come on, you're not even gonna give me 23? - 23.
- All right.
Deal.
$23.
And I even got a box for you.
Cool.
Dude, you know what you should do from now on? Whenever you answer the phone, give it the Christian Bale Batman voice.
Comics.
Why does he growl? Did you ever figure that out? It's because he's trying to be intimidating.
If you got a guy dressed in a costume and he's growling in your face, you're more apt to listen to what he's saying.
Definitely.
Give me a ham and swiss on rye.
I might put a little bit more ham on your sandwich - if I was behind the counter.
- Really? Yeah, "this guy's a lunatic, I might want to" make sure he's happy with his sandwich.
" Knowing that, man, it doesn't have to stop there.
Try it with your girl.
Oh, that's a good idea! She's like, "we can go to second base.
" And I was like, "I was thinking third.
" And then she'll just do it.
It would hurt your voice though.
I can hardly talk.
That's why you're not Batman.
That's why you're hanging out in a comic book store.
- Hey, man, how you doing? - I'm all right, how's it going? - Good, my name's Walt.
- I'm Andrew.
Bryan.
Hey, Bryan.
- You looking to sell today? - Yeah, for sure.
I have this-- this, uh, Thor poster.
They came out with a whole series of these.
There was one with the Fantastic Four, and Silver Surfer, and Doctor Doom.
I've seen the Doctor Doom and the Silver Surfer one before.
This is the only time that I've ever seen this.
That's how Kirby's work should be presented.
- It's just coming at you.
- In a poster-sized panel.
I mean, it's absolutely gorgeous.
I feel myself getting nerdier by the minute.
Jack "the king" Kirby was the artist that defined the look of a lot of the characters that you know.
The Fantastic Four, Spider-man, The Incredible Hulk.
Explain "Kirby dots.
" It's just black dots portrayed on a page to convey energy, space.
It was just, like, this weird touch that he would throw into things that became kind of his signature, and not just in his work, but in comics kind of in general.
Like, he put a stamp on storytelling.
Visual storytelling has been with us longer than we've had words.
They can go back and find cave drawings.
"Here's a big buffalo.
We all attacked it with many arrows.
" And stuff like that.
It'd be interesting to find a cave drawing with some Kirby dots around it.
Oh, my g-- right? Could you imagine? "He's a fraud!" "Yet another white man stole from the native Americans!" Like most do.
All right, is that it today? No, I have Tomb of Dracula #10, which is the first appearance of Blade, from the Wesley Snipes movies.
I mean, Wesley Snipes, I thought he played a perfect Blade.
They should've given him a pass with the tax stuff for it.
So how come you're moving this? I recently purchased a house and, you know, trying to make some repairs and this and that.
So I'm hoping that whatever I can get from-- from this stuff can be added to the fund.
Okay, so how much you want for the poster? I'm looking for - Buck and a quarter, huh? - Yep.
Um.
Now's the moment, dude.
The voice.
- What's that? - Use the voice on him.
I don't know if I can go that high.
Okay.
It's working! Um, if I were to take the Tomb of Dracula and the Thor poster today, what could you do me for those two? I'd say$400? So you think this is worth $300? Um, it's also signed by Gene Colan, who was the cover artist and the artist who did - the inside of the book.
- Yeah.
The fact that it's signed doesn't do anything, you feel, to the value? Um It's not authenticated.
When I sell it to somebody in the store, I'm gonna have to go in there saying, - "look, it's signed" - Sure.
"I think it's by Gene Colan.
" Yes, it is.
And then they'll believe it.
There's no way to really tell if that's a real-deal signature.
I don't want to put your reputation on the line or the Stash's reputation on the line of selling bogus signatured items.
Do people get tight if you're like, "I'm sorry, man," like, the autograph doesn't help in my case, it kinda hurts.
" Do they get, like, "hey, what are you, crazy?" Yeah, they almost get like "what are you insinuating? I'm some sort of, uh, crook or I'm aShim-sham man?" Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Nobody wants to be a shim-sham man.
How about 160 for The Tomb of Dracula, first appearance of Blade, and the Kirby Thor poster? - 160.
- Cash, right now, done.
I think I'm gonna hold on to Tomb of Dracula and for sure 100 bucks for the Thor poster, it's yours.
Um, okay, I wanted both though.
Um175 for both.
- I can't--I just-- - Okay.
I don't think I'm ready to sell this yet.
Okay.
How about the poster? $75 for the poster.
All right, $75 it is.
- Got yourself a deal.
- All right.
Let me ask you something.
Do people ever come in here to buy anything? Feels like no.
Thank you.
All right.
Take it easy.
- For sure, man.
- All right.
That is awesome.
Hey! Hot dogs are for closers.
Right, douche bags? Bottom line, Mike made 54, Brian made 42.
What did Ming bring in today? All right, let's count it up here.
Wow, he put you to shame.
Well, he made an extra $2 by staying an extra five hours.
If that's winning, I'm okay.
I think it's fine to just Give the man - His just due.
- You did well, man.
Showed up early, you stayed late.
Plus you get to stick a fat shiny hotdog in your mouth.
Go on, take another bite of your victory, wiener Ming.
Don't let him take it away.
You earned every bite.
Every inch that goes down your throat.
I guess that's gonna do it for this week.
On Comic Book Men.
I'm Kevin Smith Brian Johnson, Walt Flanagan, Ming Chan, - and Michael Zapzack.
- Don't stop believing.