Costume Quest (2019) s01e01 Episode Script

1 No, no, no, I'm telling you guys, nothing beats the Steel Dragon coaster.
The part where you go bah-doom! I mean, come on.
No way, sis.
The Prospector's Log Ride has been the best attraction since Nougatown's opening day - in 1955.
It's a classic.
- In 1955.
It's a classic.
Yeah, yeah, we've all heard this speech before.
Sorry, guys, but it's all about the fun house.
Come on, it's got "fun" in the name.
- Back me up on this, Lucy.
- Well, Everett, I've ridden every animal on the carousel, and no two are the same experience.
It's a hundred rides in one.
All right, all right, enough of this squawking.
We got to be first in line when the new Abe Lincoln Jr.
costumes drop.
- We should have left hours ago.
- Oh, yeah.
- Ooh.
[gasps.]
- [fanfare playing.]
The Ned Nougat Show.
Oh, no.
Nougat! Nougat! Welcome to our world of sugar and sweet You look like a friend that's a pleasure to meet There's one thing in our town, Auburn Hollow It's good and grand and great to swallow Nougat, nougat Everybody loves it Nougat, nougat Everybody loves it Come on down and don't you frown To the wonderful land of Nougatown That's our story, don't forget The greatest candy ever is our own nougat.
And that's the end of this goofy song.
Now come on, you guys, let's move along.
See you tomorrow, Ned.
[grunts.]
Have a noug-tastic day.
NARRATOR: Coming this Halloween starring Internet sensation and local hero Roody Tootz as Abe Lincoln Jr.
Toucan? [squawks.]
More like Tou-can't.
[shouts.]
NARRATOR: Abe Lincoln Jr.
: Inter-Dimensional Mega Hero.
'Sup, kids.
Want to be the one and only Abe Jr.
? Then all y'alls got to go out and buy your very own costume tonight and tonight only at your local supplier.
Or be the lamest kid on Earth.
- Your choice, fam.
- [kids cheer.]
Man, we're all gonna look so awesome in our Abe Lincoln Jr.
costu [giggles.]
No! [gasps.]
Four Lincolns left.
Sold out? Dudley, come on, man.
Sorry, Wren.
Those are for me.
Why do you need four? Well, I need a backup.
And a backup for the backup.
Oh, and one for my dog who could probably also use a backup.
Give me those Lincolns.
[laughs.]
[screams.]
Well, at least we tried.
No way, Reynold.
There's got to be another store selling those golden little Lincoln suits, and we're gonna find them.
- No more costumes left.
- [grunts.]
- Sorry, we're all out of Lincoln Jr.
s.
- [groans.]
Kid, this is a dentist office.
And we sold out of Lincolns hours ago.
[groans.]
First day of the season and Halloween's already ruined.
Come on, mama.
We'll get those costumes somehow.
Picture them floating aimlessly in the universe, waiting for us to find them.
- Huh? - Huh? Hey, Wren, how about this one? There could be costumes in there.
Okay, okay.
Don't oversell it.
- Welcome.
- [gasps.]
Maybe I was wrong about this place.
We ain't leaving without those Lincoln suits.
Hello? Hello? [snoring.]
- Hey, bub.
- Oop! Oh, hi.
Uh, welcome to Norm's.
I'm Norm.
Don't need your life story.
We've been looking for these Abe Lincoln Jr.
costumes all night.
Costumes! You're looking for costumes? What Wait, now, which Wait all four of you? Uh, yeah.
[squeals.]
Now, costumes I got.
You have the deluxe, reversible, Abe Lincoln Jr.
: Inter-Dimensional Mega Hero upcoming Roody Tootz smash movie officially licensed costume? Oh, yeah, yeah.
Ol' Norm's got all kinds.
[inhales.]
[playing "Take Me Out to the Ball Game" off-key.]
- Wow.
- Whoa.
Cool! Oh, yeah! No way.
[laughs.]
Check this out.
Cool setup you got here, Norm, but, uh, where are those official Lincoln Jr.
s you said you had? Ah, come on, kid.
Don't tell me this isn't better than one of those highly flammable, polyester junk costumes they sell today.
You could be anything you want with all this stuff.
The only limit is your imagination.
Mm-hmm.
Come on, Wren.
Check this stuff out.
Fine.
But only 'cause the unicorn said so.
So, what'd you come up with? - I'm a robot.
- I'm a magician.
- I'm a jellyfish.
- [sighs.]
I'm Abe Lincoln Jr.
: Inter-Dimensional Mega Hero.
Abe Jr.
, huh? What's that on your back there? That's the nitro boost jetpack with the dual cannons I invented for my Lincoln Jr.
fanfic.
Well, I think that's the best part of the whole getup.
Still not as good as the real one.
Anyway, I say you kids have earned your first costume from ol' Norm's on the house.
But before you head out, there's something important I got to tell you.
It was 100 years ago, - and the repu - [door opens.]
Welcome.
- [scoffs.]
- [gasps.]
[playing "Take Me Out to the Ball Game".]
Well, this has been fun.
Right this way, kids.
- Norm, stop pushing.
- Hey! Yep, so, that's the lot of it.
Just don't tell anyone where you got those costumes.
That was weird.
Was he trying to get rid of us? Maybe it's, uh, time to go home.
This stuff is so great.
My coat smells like pomade and old cheese.
- [Reynold and Everett laugh.]
- So, Wren, Abe's got a nitro boost jetpack in the fanfic now? Yeah.
I'm thinking about it.
- [clattering.]
- Did you guys hear that? Probably a ghost or something.
[Lucy gasps.]
Oh, hey.
Sorry to scare you, little dudes.
I just wanted to tell you guys, those are some pretty sweet costumes.
- Thanks.
- [chuckles.]
So, where'd you get those things? Uh, actually, we made them ourselves.
Hmm.
Well, that's pretty cool, but I think I got something even cooler.
[angelic voices singing.]
Sweet baby Lincolns.
So, I'll trade you for 'em straight up.
- No, thanks.
- We like ours.
- We like ours.
- Deal! - [gasping.]
Hey you dropped your nougat.
[squeaking.]
- Um sir? - [gasps.]
Aah.
Aah! Aah! Come on, kids.
Just give me those costumes.
I don't know what's going on here, bub, but why don't you - I said give me 'em! - [screaming.]
[panting.]
[pants, groans, yells.]
We got to find someplace to hide! I know just the place.
[panting.]
This is not gonna work.
Just pretend that you're a robot.
- He's getting closer.
- Quiet! [groaning.]
I'm a magician.
I'm just a magician.
I'm a jellyfish.
Be the jellyfish.
I'm Abe Jr.
, tough as nails Abe Jr.
I'm a robot.
I'm a robot.
I'm a robot.
[electrical whirring and whooshing.]
Uh guys? What is happening? Interest Ouch! Guys, shh! Guys? [groans loudly.]
Phew.
- [whizzing.]
- [gasps.]
[firework squeals.]
[all gasping.]
Do you think he saw that? [yells.]
[screaming.]
- [panting.]
- [grunts.]
[whimpering.]
Huh? All right, brats, I've had enough playtime.
Hand over the costumes! Costumes? Costumes! Did she just ditch us? [growling.]
Show me what you got, baby.
- [whimpering.]
- [wood creaking.]
I want those costumes, and I want to know where you got 'em.
- We're not supposed to tell anyone.
- [grunts.]
- This is my last warning.
- WREN: Hey, bub! I think it's time you leave my friends alone.
[scoffs.]
Yeah? And who's gonna stop me? I hope this works.
Abe Lincoln Jr.
That's who.
[grunting.]
[loud whoosh.]
- [grunts.]
- [loud whoosh.]
- Oh, no.
- [grunting.]
[grunting.]
ALL: Wow! [whirring.]
[squeaking.]
[groaning.]
[gasping.]
[gasps.]
They're back? [whimpers.]
They're back! Who's back? That was the coolest thing I have ever seen in my life! Lucy, you were like, "Zap.
" Everett, you were all like, "Wah, wah, wah, wah!" [laughs.]
Reynold, of course, you were like, "Ta-da!" Man, we showed that creep what's up.
Question, why would a monster want our costumes so bad? Uh since when are monsters real? Guys, what just happened?! Let's, uh, go talk to Norm.
[thunder crashing.]
WREN: Okay, Norm better have answers when we get back to the old antique shop, or it's gonna be chicka-pow! Come on, Wren.
Norm gave us the costumes.
He should be able to tell us what's going on.
And I got a million questions for him.
How are these costumes magic? Did Norm know about the monster? Did that really happen, or did we all have a mass hallucination? Exactly! [doorknob rattling.]
"Gone fishin' at the lake.
" But what does that mean? That's just grown-up talk for "too lazy to work.
" Maybe he really went fishing.
But fishing season ended two months ago and they don't restock the lake till spring.
Told ya! This dude's blowing us off.
Looks like we're on our own.
What do we do now? - I think we should tell my mom.
- What? - You want to tell your mom? - Yeah, my mom.
No way.
Before we took him down, that monster looked like a totally normal person.
That means anyone in town could be a monster.
Even your mom.
My mom made blueberry pancakes this morning and warmed the syrup! Would a monster do that? Let's vote.
All in favor of not telling Everett's mom in case she really is a monster raise your hand.
[birds chirping.]
And all for telling? I really prefer secret ballot votes.
- Grr! - [whoops.]
Democracy! Let's go! Hey, Baby Ev.
Hey, kids.
- What's up? - Hey, Ma! We wanted to tell you about this monster who attacked us, and his head fell off.
Whenever he was around nougat, this purple drool came out of his mouth, and we need your help catching him! A monster on the loose in our town? This is a code red situation! I'm on it.
Breaker 1-9, we've got a code red on our hands.
I repeat, a code red.
Uh, be advised, our perp is a monster who drools purple and his head may fall off.
She's a pro.
[grunts.]
Ha! [mimics walkie static.]
"Uh, got you loud and clear, Nichols.
"We just bagged a leprechaun last week.
I'll keep an eye out for your monster.
Over.
" Everett, she's messing with us.
MAN [over walkie.]
: Officer Nichols, what's your 10-20? We've got a signal 4 on Green Street.
- Please report.
- 10-4.
Sorry, kids.
I got to go back to the real danger.
Fender bender on Green Street.
But that was a lot of fun.
Maybe we can play pretend again when I get off work tonight.
But, Mom, we weren't Mm-hmm.
Yep.
[engine starts.]
[siren whoops.]
Mom! The monsters are really real! Well, at least you know she's not a monster.
- Don't be so sure.
- [horn honks.]
Get your cameras and selfie sticks ready, folks! Feast your eyes on the most famous celebrities in all of Auburn Hollow, my kids.
Say hi, my beautiful kids.
- Hi, my beautiful kids.
- Hi, my beautiful kids.
They're standing in front of the statue of Auburn Hollow's founder, Mr.
Scottopulous Auburn.
Ooh.
Hey, maybe telling just one mom didn't work, but what about telling a whole bus full of people? Yes.
A captive audience.
I don't know.
The disturbing news could detract from the tour's fascinating nougat facts.
Are you all nuts? Telling more people just ups the chance that one of them is a monster.
Yeah, sure.
Monsters are everywhere.
Hey, Wren, maybe even one of us is a monster.
Everett, don't encourage her.
WREN: That's just what a monster would say.
- [grunts.]
- Yah! [laughing.]
You're all clear, Luce.
[coughs.]
- You guys next.
[laughs.]
- [bus engine rumbling.]
- Uh-uh.
- Oop.
GORDON [over radio.]
: Hey, hey, hey.
Lookie here.
Celebs, they're just like us.
[tourists exclaiming.]
What do you say you show the tourists how exciting history can be? Really? I can give the tour? I think you're ready, bud.
You got the whole thing memorized.
Reynold, this is your chance.
Warn them about the monster.
Do it.
[inhales.]
Yes.
Coming up on our left is the Nougatown Factory and Amusement Park, run by the ever-mysterious Lady Oona.
Legend says that Oona is over 100 years old.
- Give me that.
- [mic feedback squeals.]
I interrupt this regularly scheduled boring tour to bring you an emergency announcement.
[gasping, murmuring.]
There's a monster loose in town.
He wears a human mask and he drools purple, and his head falls off, and he's bad.
Real bad.
We need your help.
Are you with me?! We're with you! [cheering.]
A spooky monster Halloween-themed tour.
Fun.
[tourists all exclaiming.]
They think it's an act.
No one believes us - again.
- Come on.
We're wasting valuable monster hunting time.
We don't need help.
We can take 'em on our own.
Or maybe we just need to be louder.
Shout it from the rooftops.
Or we can go online and hack Roody Tootz's channel and Don't you dare touch Roody's channel.
Okay, okay.
Let go.
- Oof.
- Hey, kids, what a great tour.
Thanks, uh Gail.
For the record, we weren't playing.
Oh, no, I know.
[whispering.]
Monsters are very real.
That's what I've been trying to say.
See? Gail gets it.
I actually want to invite you to a group I'm part of.
It's, uh, well, it's a [whispering.]
monster experiencer support group.
- Uh - This may sound crazy - It does.
- You see, I myself have come face-to-face with a monster.
Everyone in the group has.
So we join together, talk about our fears and share information to defeat the beasts.
We know how to stop 'em.
You just got to put on some cos Shh, Everett.
Sorry, but there's no way we're going to that.
No.
No pressure.
No pressure.
I totally understand.
But you're all welcome to join us, and we'd love to have you.
Hope to see you there tonight.
[scoffs.]
It's obviously a trap.
You think everything's a trap.
We should totally go to this meeting.
Right, guys? - Mm.
- Mm.
Fine.
Then I guess I'll have to go by myself, without anyone else.
Just me.
Alone.
Wait.
If you're going, I'm going with you.
What? If we're getting eaten, we're getting eaten together.
Who said anything about getting eaten? You guys.
What if we go in costume? So if it's a trap we'll be ready.
Yeah, and we can bring nougat bars to detect if anyone these is a purple-drooling creep.
What do you say, Wren? Ugh.
All right, I'll go.
I wonder if they have snacks? Who wants doughnuts? - ATTENDEE: Yeah.
- ATTENDEE 2: I want doughnuts.
Huh, this isn't so scary.
I mean, we know all these people.
Hi, Dog Walker Doyle.
[muffled.]
Hi.
Hey, Mail-Lady-I-Don't-Remember Your-Name-But-You-Seem-Cool.
It's Helen.
Helen.
Hello, Monster Experiencers.
- ALL: Hi, Gail.
- MAIL LADY: Hey.
This is a space where we can share our personal monster encounters in a circle of trust.
Okay, who'd like to start us off? [whispering.]
Seems legit enough.
- I don't know.
- [clears throat.]
My fellow monster experiencers, my friends and I came face-to-face with a monster and lived to tell the tale.
- [gasping.]
- Just last night, my friends and I got chased by a creepy teenager and he attacked us and tried to steal from us, and we beat him up and Wren knocked him down - and his head fell off.
- I knew it.
EVERETT: He was ugly and green.
And he drooled purple, just like [gurgling.]
you guys.
So we can all agree I was right.
This is a deadly trap.
Now it's time to throw down.
- Ha! - Ready, old girl? - Blep.
- Hmm.
Do I need a magic word, or Ta-da! [gasps.]
It's true.
They do have powers.
Eh, they don't look that powerful.
- I'm out.
- Run away! [screaming.]
Come on.
You can't all be monsters.
Forget it.
I'll take out these little brats on my own.
[roars.]
I wish my mom was here.
Uh, tie-him-up-maximus.
Run! Mm.
I've got tricks, too.
Give it up, runts.
You have no idea how dangerous we monsters are.
Are you kidding? We're just kids.
[cackles.]
- Everett, help us! - [screaming.]
Kids should be at home playing video games.
Not out fighting monsters! That's why we're trying to tell an adult.
[Monster Gail grunting.]
To get help, and make things go back to normal.
It's not our fault no one listened.
Ow! Uh, is it just me, or Is Everett winning? He's got her on the ropes.
Let's finish her.
Nougat.
[growls.]
- Let's do this.
- Yeah! [gasps.]
I've been Grubbinized.
Give it up, Gail.
Your support group's gone, but I got mine right here.
[gasps.]
No! [chittering.]
Sorry, guys.
You were right.
Nobody's gonna help us.
It's just us versus all them monsters.
Just like in Return of the Alien Pod Shifters.
Four spunky heroes against an entire monster army.
- Oh, how did that one end? - Everybody died.
- [screams.]
- But they didn't have cool monster-stompin' costumes.
[laughs.]
[popping sound.]
Okay, we gotta learn how to use these things.
Like, right now.
Frederator! [owl hooting.]