Cow and Chicken (1997) s01e01 Episode Script

1
Mama had a chicken. ♪
Mama had a cow. ♪
Dad was proud. ♪
He didn't care how. ♪
Cow. ♪
Chicken. ♪
Cow and Chicken! ♪
Ha ha ha ha!
We're going on a field
trip, a field trip ♪
We're going on,
on a field trip ♪
We're going
Back off!
I'm only sitting with you
because Mom and Dad
said I had to.
Want to count my teats?
That's it! I'm sitting
with Flem and Earl!
Chicken, I can't believe
we're going to prison.
Way cool!
Yeah. Maybe we'll see a riot!
I'm going to pretend I
am doing hard time.
There it is! The big house!
Let me see!
Chicken, that's a good
way to lose a beak!
Ah, shut up, Cow!
Mind your own beeswa--
What?
Folsom Prison!
Barbed wire and everything!
Indoor exercise program
Advanced painting class
Friendly screws.
Flem, Earl, check this out!
You guys come here often? Oh!
Move it along! This
is an exercise yard!
So exercise!
Hee hee hee!
Jail break!
Sound the alarm!
Eat dust, you filthy screw!
Way to go, Red.
Tee hee!
Lock down!
Hmm.
All aboard, Chicken.
I don't know what
got into you, Red,
but I don't like it.
They think I'm Red.
Are you really Chicken?
Yup. Can't you read?
Quick. Who are our parents?
Um, Mom and Dad.
I hope my pinhead sister Cow will
inform the teacher of my absence.
Roll call! Flem?
Here!
Cow?
Here.
Chicken?
Uh, oh, uh, here.
Jack the Zipper?
Here!
Booby the Clown?
Here!
Rhode Island Red?
Red?
Oh, uh, here!
Hey, Red. Way to go out there.
We think you're pretty tough,
pulling down that
guard's pants and all.
Cool.
Ok, class.
Recess!
Recess!
Hey, Chicken, want
to play jump rope?
Sure.
Red rover, red rover,
send Red right over.
You all right, Red?
A-ok.
My mother, your mother,
lived across the lane ♪
What's say we get some grub?
Oh, I didn't know you liked
tea parties, Chicken.
Ohh
I'll have pork butts
and taters, please.
Hey, this isn't pork
butts and taters!
This is dog doo!
It's Tuesday! I always have pork
butts and taters on Tuesday!
We want pork butts and taters!
Pork butts and taters!
Pork butts and taters!
Pork butts and taters!
Chicken needs a
diaper change again!
You're not Chicken! Chicken
would never play with me!
You're a big, fat prisoner
wearing Chicken's name tag.
Somebody's got to get
Chicken out of the slammer!
! Hola! Supercow!
Pork butts and taters!
Pork butts and taters!
Pork butts and tat--
taters.
It's the warden's
office for you!
Hello, it's me-- the warden.
Ha ha!
Well, well, if it isn't old Red.
Having trouble adjusting
to prison life?
Warden, I'm not Red.
I'm Chicken, and I got
to be home by 8:00
or I'm in big trouble.
Anyhow, Mom is making
pork butts and taters.
She only makes it on Tuesdays.
It's my favorite.
Oh, I didn't realize that, Red.
You're not really Red, are you?
You're a little lost
chicken, aren't you?
Let's clear all this up.
You and I will talk to
the boys right now.
Ha ha ha!
Ladies! And gentlemen.
A terrible injustice
has been done here.
Red doesn't belong here.
He's innocent.
He wants to go home
with Mom and Dad
and eat pork butts and taters!
Now, let's all join hands
and say we're sorry!
Sorry, Red.
Now, someone has to pay
for Red's injustice.
10 years in solitary
confinement for everybody
Without a toilet.
Supercow al rescate!
Supercow!
Anyone want to play jump rope?
Sure!
My mother, your mother
lived across the Lane
uh-huh. He did?
Thanks for saving
my butt today, Cow.
I owe you one.
Chicken, the warden at
Folsom Prison just called.
I know what he said!
I did time at the big house
'cause I pants-ed the guard!
He said he found your name tag
that you lost on your field trip,
but I appreciate you coming
clean with me, Chicken.
I'm proud of you, son.
Me, too, Chicken. Oh, oh!
You kids ready for some
pork butts and taters?
Are we?!
Pull! Pull! Pull!
Hey, Chicken. Want some milk?
Sure.
You're getting it all over me!
At least squirt it
into the cup first!