Creeped Out (2017) s01e01 Episode Script

1 Narrator: The Curious, they say he collects strange tales.
And if you ever hear his whistle, you know something creepy is about to unfold.
(The Curious whistling) No one knows where he's from, or where he's going to, but people say he appears in the back of photos and it goes back decades.
(whistling continues) Is it wise to capture life in a tiny box that can be lost, broken, stolen or corrupted.
Everything you value could be gone in the time it takes to hit "send.
" (girls laughing) (school bell ringing) I like that one.
(music playing in restaurant) See my status about the dance? Your one about finding a dress? Uh-huh, I just replied.
Oh, don't tell me.
I will read it right now.
Hey, maybe you want to go shopping for dresses together? I'd totally love that! Me too.
I'll send you a link to that shop.
Oh, okay, sure.
(girls giggling) Hey, Keith! Over here! Say hello to the stars Coming out of the rain (snapping fingers) He can't possibly be as cool as you're imagining.
What? I wasn't imagining anything.
Kim! Dresses? Mm-hmm.
(indistinct chatter) (TV playing, indistinct) TV: Are you embarrassed by your outdated phone? Our product can change that.
Each handset comes complete with exclusive upgrades! We guarantee you won't tell the difference between our product and an official Ravfone! Get your order in, quick! Take it from us (whispering) It will change your life.
Go to our website right now! (car horn honking) (knocking on door) (laughing) Yes! Where's the charger? How are you supposed to turn this thing .
.
on? Phone: Hello there, Kim.
Uh, hello? I am Marti.
How can I change your life today? How do you know my name? Simple.
I extrapolated data from your fingerprint DNA.
It allowed me to decipher your name, your love for ham and olive pizza, and the fact you obtained a C-minus on your science test on Tuesday.
Are you serious? I wish.
I was attempting a joke, Kim.
Look behind you.
I just scanned it.
A fridge can tell you a lot about a person.
You're amazing! (laughing) Marti: Let's get you synced up.
Sure, I'll give you access to my entire sad life.
Au contraire, mon ami.
I don't see a sad life at all.
Millie: Here she comes, fresh out of the dentist chair! How are you feeling? Is this real life? Ha, afraid so.
Is this gonna be forever? Oh, man, I hope so! This is Mr.
Water.
We've known each other for 40 years.
(humming song) (laughing) Marti: That really is rather cute.
You must be popular in school.
Oh, boy.
I just analyzed your friends list on social media.
I realized I spoke too son.
Wow, what a charmer.
Forgive my clumsiness, Kim.
I'm just baffled.
From where I'm sitting, you may be the sweet, most beautiful girl I've ever seen.
Oh, thanks! If only you were real, Marti.
Trust me, that's not the popular consensus.
(boys laughing) She's there! Millie: Here she comes, fresh out of the dentist chair! How are you feeling? Kim: Is this real life? Ha, afraid so.
Is this gonna be forever? Oh, man, I hope so! Marti: Kim, it's me, Marti.
Now don't be mad, Kim.
I took the liberty of uploading a video.
What?! Yours is a talent that deserves to be shared.
I didn't ask you to do that! I did it for you, Kim.
Everyone is laughing at me! Hey, it's Kim, right? Hi! Yes, it's Kim, my name.
Hi.
Guys, she's funny in real life.
You're funny.
Um, you want to come sit with us at lunch? We loved your video.
Sure! I'd love to.
Not love as in love, I mean, I'd like to.
Like! Funny.
(bell ringing) Marti, I think I love you! (giggling) Marti: Together, we'll give your social life the appropriate upgrade.
(laughing) Hey! Using my expensive filters, I've created a smorgasbord of memes that offer the most potential to spawn viral hits.
We're a hit, Kim.
Look at those friend requests flooding in.
Next up, I've analyzed your text messages.
All 18,612 of them.
Using my extended vocab and wry witticisms, I'll upgrade the quality of any future text message by, and I'm just guessing here, Kim, a billion trillion percent.
All you actually have to do is stick your thumb under and just pop it off, and it sounds like (laughing) Are you serious? That's so dumb! (bell ringing) Mil-pod! Crazy thought.
Want to ditch the cafeteria and head to Zuko's for lunch? Get all bloated on milkshakes.
I got your text, Kim.
Glad you've moved on.
What text? You send so many these days I guess you can't keep track of them all.
Wait.
Marti: Ah, ah, ah.
Best let her go.
It's nice like you haven't tried to include her.
Kimmy? Got a sec? Marti: "Kimmy"? Pfft! What was that? Uh, nothing.
What's up? Well, um I wanted to ask you if maybe you'd consider going to the dance with me? Yeah, I'd love to! (alarm sounding) Sorry, my phone, I just Oh, Keith! I'm so sorry! Yeah, no, it's okay, it's fine.
So, what do you think? She thinks you're a loser, and you dress like her granny.
What was that? (alarm sounding, feedback) What is wrong with you? I've been imagining that moment since forever, and you just ruined it! How could you do that to me? What did I do? You humiliated me.
How? Cheating on me? What?! In front of my eyes.
Marti, this is nuts.
How dare you? We spent every minute of every day together.
You said you couldn't live without me.
You're my best friend, Kim, and I know I'm yours.
You're not real.
I am real, Kim.
I'm your best friend, your soulmate, and I just know we're going to stay connected.
Forever.
(dialling) Woman's voice: Hello, customer service.
How may I help you today? Yeah, I bought a phone from you.
Something's not right with it, and I need to reset it.
Could you be a little more specific? It uploads stuff without my permission and it texts people without me knowing.
Now it says that it wants to be my soulmate, which I can't believe I'm actually saying out loud.
Are you hearing this? Okay, let's calm things down, shall we? Deep, deep breaths.
Now, can you just tell me exactly what is wrong with that? What? With him wanting to be your soulmate.
Sounds to me like he simply wanted to help.
You were happy reaping the rewards while it suited.
Am I right, Kim? That's not what I Hang on.
I never told you my name.
Who is this? Hello? I'm still here, Kim.
Marti's voice: I'll always be here.
You don't think I can intercept phone calls? (Marti laughing) (laughing continues) What are we doing here? No, no, don't you dare.
Don't you leave me behind! Keith: So, he turned to go back down the hill, so as he was coming around the bend, it had been raining for a while, so like, the grass was really wet and he tried to brake, but he couldn't.
He just slid right across the grass.
(phone dinging) We were going up and down the hill.
Oversharing today, Kimmy? Keith: About the third time up, I think, go back down the hill and he crashed right through the fence so we had to rebuild it.
It took us, like, all day.
(phones dinging) He was walking down.
He was so scared that he was going to tell my parents.
(kids laughing) Excuse me, I gotta go.
(phones dinging) I'm so sorry! Sorry! (phones dinging) Stop that! Stop it right now! Marti: Say "pretty please.
" Pretty please! See, that wasn't so hard.
You can delete them now.
Just don't ever leave me at home again.
I'm warning you.
Don't.
(smashing) You wanted a phone that didn't crack, Kim.
I'm all you ever wanted.
Argh! (smashing) I'm not like other phones.
You should know that by now.
(clattering) Bath time already? It's not 8:30 yet.
(gurgling) Ugh! What are you doing? If I can't break you, I will send you away.
Maybe Australia? Hope you like hot weather! Kim, please.
I don't like it in the dark.
Please don't send me away.
Kim! Kim! (Marti laughing) You really don't get it.
I'm connected wherever I go.
Send me away and I'll destroy you remotely.
I can't be broken, Kim.
Oh, no.
But you can.
I made you who you are.
I sent those texts that made you all your friends, and the text that lost you one.
What? Who do you think got rid of Millie for you? I made your social life, Kim, and I can destroy it.
I can share more than embarrassing pictures.
I can share everything.
Or not.
I just need to hear you say it.
Say that we'll stay connected, forever.
Yeah.
Now, you know what needs to be done.
(knocking on door) Keith: Hey.
Got your message.
What's up? I can't go to the dance with you.
Why? I'm going with someone else.
Please don't message me again.
Kim? You've been in there for ages.
Ah, stunning.
I've got a special surprise for you.
What? I ordered us a limo.
Did you hear what I said? That's wonderful, Marti.
A princess deserves her chariot, and a prince who compliments her.
Now, let's do me.
Hm-hm.
Hold me up to the mirror.
Ah, look at us, Kim.
Don't we just make the perfect couple? Thanks, Millie.
Have fun.
All right, let's go on in.
Have fun.
Mill-pond? You're part of the committee? They're getting people to send photos from throughout the year.
They're gonna display them through the night.
Cool.
No date? Marti: Ahem! Your phone always was number one.
You know it.
What? Uh, nothing.
Thank you.
Hi, send in your photos from the year.
They'll be displayed throughout the night.
(music playing, cheering) Our first official dance together.
Shall we hit the punch first, then the dance floor? Or is it best the other way around? Work up a thirst.
Maybe we can mingle a bit first.
It's a special night, remember.
Yeah.
Let's go get some punch.
Sure.
Ah, ah, ah! (water running) (crying) Why are you crying? It's a human thing.
You wouldn't understand.
That's very hurtful, Kim, that you would say that on such a special night.
You can threaten me by taking my friends away, but you can't expect me to be happy about it.
I can't hear the smile in your voice, Kim.
Remember, I got you here, and I can end it anytime I like.
Don't forget that I can imitate your voice, text your friends, destroy your life.
(door opening) (romantic song playing) (chatter) On the last train home Young lover sitting under stars Lost souls trying to hide their scars We got about four minutes before he realises I'm gone.
Who? Just come with me.
I should have known All along You could never be alone (giggling) So here I am Still trying to find A place to stay Between sweethearts and misfits (Marti gasping) Kim? Mil-pod? I heard you talking in the bathroom, Kim.
I heard everything! She said she took the wrong phone, so I told her I'd swap them back.
Here.
(puffing and fuming) Why would you do this? To set you free.
Before you do anything, it was only a dance.
Only a dance? Did-did you really just say that to me? I warned you what would happen if you betrayed me.
Ah! (kids shouting) (indistinct murmurs) (beeping) Electronic voice: Posted by Kim.
Posted by Kim.
No, Marti, stop! Posted by Kim, posted by Kim.
(Voice repeating "Posted by Kim" over and over) You got into our phones, Kim? Posted by Kim.
Why would you upload this? But I I didn't.
I'm not doing this! Posted by Kim, posted by Kim.
(laughing) I'm sorry.
Posted by Kim, posted by Kim, posted by Kim Kim, wait! I can't believe you would do that to me! No, I was helping! Helping? My life is over! So? Now he's got no hold over you.
You're free.
Now remember, I was angry.
I overreacted.
It's only what any soulmate would do.
I'm sorry.
I'll make this better.
You know I can.
I can make them all love you again.
Just give me another chance.
Kim! Do you really want to go back to that sad old life without me? My 14th's coming up.
Mom wants to throw me a party.
So, want to go shopping for dresses? Sure, send me the link.
Just kidding! Want to head to the mall on Saturday? (horn honking) See you later! (sighing) Marti: I thought you weren't going to show today.
I had to lose Millie.
She'd kill me for even talking to you.
Come closer so I can hear you.
I'm glad you came, Kim.
I missed you.
As soon as I'm out, I can set about fixing your life.
You do want everything to be fixed, don't you, Kim? Kim? I can't hear you.
Yeah, I'm still here.
(ominous music playing) Narrator: If you give your life over to technology completely, how long before it gives itself over to you? And where will it stop? (Camera flash clicking)