Cruel Intentions (2024) s01e01 Episode Script

1
["Rebel Girl" playing]
That girl thinks
She's the queen of the neighborhood ♪
She's got the hottest trike in town ♪
That girl
She holds her head up so high ♪
I think I wanna be
Her best friend, yeah ♪
Rebel girl, rebel girl ♪
Love you like a sister always
Soul sister, rebel girl ♪
Come and be my best friend
Really, rebel girl ♪
[students] We've been
waiting for you all summer,
and we're so glad you're finally here.
[rhythmic clapping]
D-E-L-T-A! P-H-I!
Hi! Hi! Hi! Hi from Delta Phi! ♪
We're saying hi, hello
Come and join the row ♪
Because we're hot, they're not ♪
No, no, no, no, no, no.
This is amateur hour.
Do you not understand that
this is more than just door stack?
Twenty-eight percent of
female senators were in sororities.
Did you know that?
Twenty percent from
the House of Representatives.
Plus Nancy Walton before Walmart.
And you are all meant to be ushering in
and welcoming our potential new members.
You are meant to be enticing them.
You are meant to be impressing them,
but I am not excited by this.
I am not captivated by this.
Do you know what I am? Hmm?
I am embarrassed because half of you
are clapping in three-four time
when clearly it's four-four.
And why, oh, why am I still hearing
Tanya's piercing little
soprano like a goddamn dog whistle?
I have a deviated septum.
We all have deviated septums, Tanya.
Drop an octave or drop the fuck out.
- Sorry.
- No, no. Do not apologize to me.
This is not about me.
This is about the rampant
unprofessionalism that, let me be clear,
is not going to fly
when Caroline gets here
because she is your president.
And we serve
at the pleasure of the president.
[Caroline] CeCe.
Caroline.
- Thanks for the ride.
- Of course.
I, too,
serve at the pleasure of the president.
I don't understand.
You forgave Rourke?
- Why didn't you tell me?
- You didn't ask.
So you and Rourke are back together?
All's well that ends well.
I'm president, Jenny is not.
Plus, she conveniently decided to
spend her senior year abroad in Madrid.
Or was it Moldova?
Moldova's, like, really dangerous.
So I've heard.
Well, good. That's good then.
Good for you and good for us.
Yes. It's a heel-clickin'
good time all around.
Keeps our ties
with Alpha Gamma strong, and
I mean, now that Rourke's president too,
you guys are like a power couple.
- Mmm.
- Like the Clintons.
[Caroline] That's not the compliment
you think it is, CeCe.
- You'd be Bill.
- Still.
Everything's running smoothly?
Rush camp has officially started,
and we expect to have a full
and final breakdown of
potential new members by end of day.
And we've done a full-timed welcome day,
conversation day
and preference day practices.
So now we're just choosing between themes,
which I have here
if you want to take a look.
And, um, I will grease
the squeaky wheel with the Welcome Girls.
I don't want you to worry about that.
This rush, your rush,
is gonna go down in Delta Phi history.
If there is a rush at all.
Sorry?
I'm just saying it's strange
you feel so confident about all of this,
given our current optics issue.
[CeCe] Optics issue?
- No, I took plantation night off.
- This is not about plantation night.
[CeCe] Is it toga night?
You know, I didn't think that
was cultural appropriation.
Unless Are the Greeks easily offended?
Wait. We are the Greeks.
No, CeCe, I'm referring to the real,
big picture,
rush-threatening optics issue that has
nothing to do with fucking toga night.
Or have you completely forgotten
about last year's spring formal?
You're so right. [sighs]
["bad idea right?" playing]
Haven't heard from you
In a couple of months ♪
But I'm out right now
And I'm all fucked up ♪
And you're callin' my phone
You're all alone ♪
And I'm sensin' some undertone ♪
And I'm right here with all my friends
But you're sendin' me your new address ♪
Thank you.
I know we're done
I know we're through ♪
But, God, when I look at you
My brain goes, "Ah" ♪
[person 1 laughing]
- [person 2] Oh. Mmm, that's nice.
- [person 1 grunting, moaning] Mm-hmm.
[person 1]
I can't believe I ran into you here.
[person 2] What can I say?
Nothing like a good hit-and-run.
- [phone chimes]
- [gasps] Sounds like someone wants you.
[shushes] What did we say about talking?
- [panting]
- [grunting]
[phone chimes]
- [panting, moaning]
- [grunting]
- [grunting]
- [moaning, panting]
- [panting]
- [clearing throat]
[grunts] Well, that was nice.
Surprisingly.
Good idea. You go out first.
[person 2] I always do.
And you're standin'
Smiling at the door ♪
My brain goes, "Ah" ♪
- Can't hear my thoughts ♪
- I cannot hear my thoughts ♪
[partygoers chattering]
Nice dress.
Thanks.
- Tell me your name again.
- Kate.
[guest 1] Hi, Lucien.
[guest 2] Hey, Lucien.
[jazz playing]
Excuse me.
Name.
Beatrice Worth.
You're not on the list.
Why don't you get us some drinks, hmm?
A crab puff? A personality, maybe?
Thanks.
Some clambake, huh?
You look very good tonight.
I know I do, Blaise.
I look very good too, by the way.
How drunk are you?
Well, I want you to do terrible
things to me till I beg you to continue.
So, very or not at all?
[chuckles] Say what you will,
but, uh, at this point in the night,
I'd argue it's evolutionary necessity.
How Darwinian.
There's our little missing link now.
- CeCe, darling.
- The candidate's been looking for you.
She has? I had no idea.
[CeCe] I texted you.
- Did you?
- Yes. Like, a lot.
That's right.
We had a whole conversation.
[grunts]
[sighs]
I think we're in great shape.
Don't you think we're in great shape?
I don't know,
I've seen you in a swimsuit before.
Like, really strong.
Like, if we end up with even a fraction
of what I think we will
You'll be
Dwayne "The Rock" fucking Johnson.
According to my numbers,
we're leading by 26.
According to your fake numbers
from your fake polling.
- Democracy is a beautiful thing, Blaise.
- It is, isn't it?
Especially when you realize how easy it is
to get people to exercise their democratic
rights exactly how you want them to.
What's this?
What's Rourke doing here with her?
Jenny Davenport.
Say, isn't she running against your girl?
He wasn't even
supposed to be in town tonight,
let alone here at our victory lap,
squiring around the competition
like a goddamn billboard
for the opposition. [gasps]
We're in a little twist about this,
aren't we?
Did you know about this?
If my grandmother had wheels,
would she be a bike?
What? I don't care about your grandmother.
What am I supposed to tell Caroline?
[Caroline] It's about knowing how to game
the system to get us what we want.
And trust me, I always get what I want.
[guests chuckling]
You certainly do, dear sister.
Stepsister.
To your impending presidency,
Sweet Caroline.
Ugh, don't call me that.
Can't think of anyone
who'd deserve it less.
Delta Phi Pi won't know what hit 'em.
You smell like Ivory soap and desperation.
You've been off fucking a poor person.
Seems like someone's jealous
without her man of the moment
around to see to her needs.
[CeCe] Excuse us. [chuckles]
Sorry to interrupt whatever this is,
but we have a small issue.
[clicks tongue] How small?
On a scale of small to substantial,
it's closer to substantial.
Tell me.
Rourke's here.
Rourke, my boyfriend, Rourke?
That's great. Where is he?
Um, the thing is he didn't come alone.
- He brought Jenny Davenport
- Shut up.
[sighs] You know,
who's running against you?
I said shut up, CeCe.
That means stop talking.
And I get that.
I just think that if we can have
an open dialogue right now,
we could troubleshoot.
- Maybe
- I need to speak with Rourke. [sighs] Now.
Okay.
[breathes shakily]
What do you think
this means, realistically?
I mean, pulling something like this
so close to the election.
Good ol' Rourke. What do we think?
A horse head in his bed?
Okay. Hypothetically,
is he cheating on you?
Did you break up? Or are you s [sighs]
Or we could do spiders?
That seems infinitely worse
than a horse's head.
Just stop. Okay? [chuckles]
Or are you still together?
But it's just that Alpha Gamma's
backing Jenny Davenport
instead of you now.
It seems like he'd be afraid of spiders.
The macho guys usually are.
Or we could do snakes.
It's much more phallic.
I'm just saying, if they've jumped
the fence, we could have real trouble
- Right here in River City.
- Can you shut up?
[chuckles] I'm just saying,
if it's more than a fidelity issue,
it might be a problem.
CeCe, please stop talking.
Why me? What about him?
He's not even being helpful.
Depends on what one finds helpful.
[scoffs]
Did you know?
What does it mean to
really know anything anyway these days?
- [all clamoring, cheering]
- [CeCe] Hazing? Here? So inappropriate.
[screaming, chattering]
[all clamoring, cheering]
[Blaise] Aw, I'm gonna miss
this pledge class.
So young, so supple.
So eager to be tortured.
[student 1] Hit Scott! Hit Scott!
[all clamoring, chattering]
See? This feels like an endorsement.
Or worse.
- [student 1] Get Scott!
- [clamoring, chattering]
Whoo!
[student 2] Oh, fuck!
- [gasps]
- [student 3] Oh, my God.
[student 4] Should we call somebody?
- [student 5] Scott!
- [student 6] He gonna be okay?
Well, this is an absolute disaster for me.
[dean] Can you tell me where you were
during the spring formal last year?
All due respect? No.
[chuckles]
Did you see anything unusual at the event?
Any illicit activity?
Illicit or explicit?
Of an illegal nature.
Do we need a lawyer?
[dean] We're hoping for your cooperation.
This isn't an official
legal investigation yet.
- Erroneous. Strike it from the record.
- Mr. Powell, please.
I just need to know
if you saw any activity
that might have contributed to
Scott Russell's hazing injury last year.
He was injured?
This has been deeply traumatic
for our entire family.
It's been months.
Why have we yet to see repercussions?
[dean] Congressman Russell,
as I explained,
the investigation is ongoing.
We've interviewed the students,
but [chuckles]
you know how these things are.
They're all extremely committed
to their code of silence.
Unless, um,
Scott is finding himself able to remember?
[Congressman Russell]
That's all right, bud.
Dean Sheffield. This happened to my son.
I wanna see some punishment.
Punishment will not be an issue.
Every fraternity
and every sorority on campus
has been put on probation
until we can find the responsible party.
And with the vice president's
daughter coming,
we've, uh, doubled campus police.
We've hired student life officers
to monitor on-campus and off-campus
You know I've given
a lot to this university.
I do, congressman,
and we are extremely grateful.
I promise you these kids are gonna
know that we are on them at all times.
[reporter] Congressman,
will you be supporting
federal anti-hazing legislation?
Oh, as parents, we're dealing
directly with the administration.
But what I can say is
we're working to ensure that
no student will ever be
damaged like this again.
- Thanks, Dad.
- Thank you, sir.
- [whimpers, chuckles]
- Okay, Mom.
Our wounded warrior returns.
- Blaise. Good to see you, son.
- Likewise, sir.
You know, we feel so much better knowing
Scott's got you to look out for him.
That's what best friends are for.
- [chuckles]
- Yeah. Totally.
I really admire you too, Scott.
You know, he's always had such
[clicks tongue]tenacity.
He must get that from you, sir.
Which, of course,
another reason why I'm looking forward
to come work for you after graduation.
Well, like I said over the summer,
any friend of Scott's
has a place in my administration.
Appreciate it, sir.
- Come here.
- All right, Dad.
Oh, I love you. All right.
- [car door closes]
- Come on. Let's get you settled.
[chattering]
[CeCe] I understand the increased security
naturally means increased scrutiny,
but I can assure you that we
will not wilt, we will not wither.
Figuratively or literally.
You'll notice we're working with
a new florist this year.
But flowers aside, let me tell you.
I would rather lay down my life
than let Scott Russell or anything else
cause any kind of optics issue.
[Caroline] One can only hope.
[driver] You're being very melodramatic.
You're taking my car.
At least spare me the lecture.
You're not even my real mother.
Okay.
Well, your real father,
he's thinking about your future
'cause you can't
or you don't seem to want to.
I like that I'm treated like just
another one of his investments. It's nice.
He has poured a lot of time
and money into you. Ergo
[Lucien] I wish
I could remember that thing
that separates raising a kid
from creating a hedge fund.
Rhymes with "glove," maybe.
[laughs] Oh, come on.
You know he loves you.
Love! That's it. Thank you.
That would've driven me crazy all day.
We both love you very much.
Look, Claudia. I know you're trying,
but it's just a little
Yeah, I know. I'm just your stepmother.
But you know, some things
are thicker than blood, Lucien,
and I always thought of you
as a little bit mine.
So you'll be paying Caroline, your actual
daughter, a visit while you're here?
Or is one pseudo-parental ambush
your limit?
Hmm.
I got a lunch meeting in DC.
Okay.
I guess I'll just tell her
you said "hi" then.
- Mm-hmm
- [car door closes]
[engine starts]
[CeCe] All impressive stats
according to the formula.
Oh, good. [sighs] Another formula.
Well, for this one,
I figured out a way to calculate PNM worth
based on a breakdown of value.
Legacy status, powerful connections,
general attractiveness level.
Keep the dogs in the kennel,
you know what I mean?
[chuckles]
And, um, financial standing for,
you know, donation potential.
Where's Annie Grover?
[CeCe] Um, like, the vice president's
daughter, Annie Grover?
Were you dropped on your head as a child,
or is there some other
relevant Annie Grover?
No, sorry.
I just left her off
because she's deep legacy at Sigma,
so I'm sure she's rushing them.
[chuckles] Plus, she's not even rich
because her dad's on,
like, a government salary.
There are more important things
than money, CeCe.
Since when?
Don't mind me.
I just feel filthy from the drive in.
- You miss me?
- Like a hole in the head.
[Lucien] So hostile.
Don't you have some vague
work-study obligation to be getting to?
- What?
- Leave now.
- Oh. Yeah. Bye.
- [shower running]
- [Lucien] Bye.
- [CeCe] Oh. Bye.
- Love you.
- [CeCe] I love you too.
So, nice ride in?
It was terribly boring actually. And long.
Tell me, brother,
what do you know about Annie Grover?
Annie Grover?
The vice president's daughter?
No, the Muppet Baby.
What is wrong with everyone? Jesus.
Well, why should I know?
She has no social media,
and apart from a few mediocre profiles
in Reader's Digest, Good Housekeeping
and a third boring publication
that I can't think of, I know nothing.
[chuckles] Doesn't sound
like nothing to me.
Well, it is, and she is, possibly,
the most nothing girl I've ever had
the pleasure of not knowing.
[Caroline] Mmm.
[sighs]
Maybe there's something to be said
for a nice, nothing kind of girl.
What is this? What do you want?
What, you can't tell me you don't
want to take a stab at the VP's daughter.
Cough it up.
Fine. I want her.
I want to have her lock,
stock and smoking barrel.
And there it is.
Lucien, I don't know if you've noticed,
but we find ourselves
a little bit on the line this year
because of this ugly
Scott Russell business.
Well, honestly,
I don't get what the big deal is.
I think the beer can loosened something
up there, and he's actually smarter now.
Regardless, you know
what they're not gonna do?
Kick the vice president's
daughter's sorority off campus.
I need you to convince her
in the way only you can.
[Lucien] Fine.
Say I deliver,
and I get her to pledge Delta Phi for you
what's in it for me?
Is the thanks of a grateful sister
no longer enough?
Well, how grateful are we talking here?
I'll give you what you want.
Official verbal definition being?
Me.
The way you've always wanted.
For up to an hour.
Hmm. I'll take that as a yes.
[siren blares, stops]
[siren blares, stops]
- [onlookers chattering]
- [photographer 1] Annie!
[staff member]
Welcome, Mr. Vice President.
- [photographer 1] Can we get a picture?
- [reporters clamoring]
[photographer 2] This way, Annie!
[photographer 3] Right over here,
Mr. Vice President.
[shutters clicking]
[photographer 1] Why don't
the two of you pair up, please?
[photographer 4] This way, please.
[photographers clamoring]
[staff member] Okay, everybody,
that's enough photos.
[chattering]
[reporter] Annie, how do you feel
about starting college?
I'm very excited. Thank you.
Man, I really had to take one for
the team to get Caroline back, you know?
But I did what I had to.
Well, that Jenny Davenport thing
was really something else.
It was a momentary lapse of judgment.
I wanted out.
Thought I wanted out,
and Jenny seemed like a good way
to expedite the process.
Fuck Jenny to fuck over Caroline.
Ill-advised, but I can admit
there's a certain poetry in that.
It doesn't matter.
Jenny's out of the picture.
And the important thing is
I've got Caroline eating
out of the palm of my hand.
Like a Clydesdale with a carrot.
Rides like one too.
You know what I mean? [laughs]
God, I really wish I didn't.
Anyway, we're all set
for the open house tomorrow.
I just need you to sign this check
to cover some extra expenses,
in case you were worried.
I'm not worried.
You're the best
social chair we've ever had.
For real.
They also serve who only stand and wait.
[chuckles] All right, fucker.
Always a delight, Rourke.
Yeah.
[people chattering]
Hey, what's up, Blaise?
[Blaise sighs]
Lucien, I got it. [sighs]
Well, just get over here and we can play.
I'll show you mine if you show me yours.
[phone beeps]
- [professor] Hello?
- Oh.
Hi, Professor Chadwick.
Forgive me if this is a stupid question,
but who are you?
Sorry. I'm Celeste Carroway.
People call me CeCe,
but I'll respond to either.
- CeCe.
- Yes.
I'm sorry, but one more time though.
Who are you?
And why are you going through my desk?
Uh
I'm CeCe. I'm your TA.
I don't have a TA.
You didn't have a TA. You do now.
No, I'm pretty sure I don't.
You're the only professor with a lecture
size of over 100 students without a TA.
Did you know that?
No, I did not. And why do you?
I'm concerned your students aren't
getting enough one-on-one discussion time.
If every one of your students participated
in every class for only 30 seconds apiece,
and that's not counting any of the time
taken up by your lecture itself,
you'd run over 15 minutes.
- Did you take my class?
- No, I'm a finance major.
- Poli-sci minor?
- No.
- But you want to TA for me?
- Yes.
Brass tacks? I need this.
I was supposed to have
an internship over the summer,
- but I became otherwise engaged.
- Otherwise engaged with what?
Please. Sorry. If you wouldn't interrupt,
I'd really like to get through this.
It's a little embarrassing.
Anyways [sighs]
I had an internship all lined up,
but I became aware,
or rather my mother became aware,
that a very sought-after surgeon
had a last-minute opening
in his summer schedule for a rhinoplasty.
Mind you, it wasn't anything desperate,
but, well, when there's an opening,
there's an opening, you know?
- I don't think
- But, well, the recovery time
was more complicated than we anticipated.
A nasty sinus infection. [sighs]
Don't worry. I'm fine now.
But it had me out of commission
for nearly the whole break.
So now, suddenly,
I've found myself entering my senior year
with no work experience and, truthfully,
a little bit of an Afrin addiction,
which does not look great on a résumé
come time to apply for grad school.
Although I probably wouldn't mention
the Afrin thing to a potential employer.
Although never say never,
because here I am with you, mentioning it.
As you can see, I'm in a tough situation,
and the fact of the matter
is, I I really need this job.
Well, your nose looks great,
but I still don't need a TA.
- Professor Chadwick, please.
- Hey
I swear to you, if you let me do this,
you won't regret it.
- Please get up
- I promise you,
I will cut your workload in half.
I'll do anything. I'll shadow you.
I'm very observant
and a very fast learner.
If you'd let me,
I'd as good as become an extension of you.
Just Just give me a chance.
I swear I can learn to grade like you,
to write like you,
I'll even think like you.
Okay, I'll give you the job.
Would you please get up?
[breathes sharply]
And I don't want you
to think like I think.
I want you to think like you think.
- Okay. [laughs]
- [laughs]
Where are you going?
Oh, you know.
Things to see, people to do.
- Huh?
- You're stopping by later, yes?
Yeah. Sure.
I'll, uh I'll stop by.
It's important.
You're our house sweetheart.
It means a lot to me
that I can rely on you.
For sure. [chuckles]
So glad we're back in this together.
Me too.
We're a united front, you and me.
Yeah.
A real power couple like the Clintons.
What is wrong with you fucking people?
Find a new reference. [sighs]
I wouldn't show this to you unless
I had complete and total trust in you.
So consider this an example of that.
Wh What is it?
Our brains.
[inhales sharply, chuckles] Wh-What?
[Scott chuckles]
It's a record.
A written history of brothers.
Past, present and future.
Like, the future Like [stammers]
the stuff that hasn't happened yet?
How do I simplify?
Uh, it's like a logbook, you know,
a bunch of written stories.
A greatest hits album
of all the best, worst behavior
of any and all Alpha Gammas.
Cool.
Anyway, I-I went through
to see if anyone had added an account
of what happened to you at formal.
There wasn't anything.
But if there had been,
we might have been able to track down
who did this to you, you know?
Make them pay.
Yeah, it doesn't really matter, dude. So
It's It's all good.
No, it does matter, Scott.
You shouldn't have to go to parties
with whoever did this to you.
Just constantly reminded
of that trauma. Just
[chuckles] Listen,
I don't remember anything, so it's cool.
- Really? Still?
- Yeah.
Nothing's jogged your memory?
Not even a little?
Nope. I mean, the last thing I remember,
I was facing the wall.
Then I woke up in the hospital and,
like, I think and I think,
but [sucks teeth]
nothing's up there, dude.
It's, like, completely empty. So
Not like that's really a new thing.
You're right. You wanna go again?
Of course.
But if during today's barbecue
anything comes up for you at all,
or if you feel
the slightest bit uncomfortable,
- you just come and find me. Okay?
- Okay.
[chuckles]
[students chattering]
Yes. I'm as settled in as I can be
in the roughly 30 minutes since you left.
Yes. Yes, I'll let you know
when I'm on my way.
It's cute, though,
that we pretend anything I do
is a mystery at all to you and Dad.
Yes. I know.
You've told me a million times.
I know you loved it.
Oh, my God. Okay. No, I'm not going
to talk to you about what I'm wearing.
- Okay. Okay. I love you too. Bye.
- [phone beeps]
Hi.
Hi.
[chuckles] Whoa. Easy.
Identify yourself.
You know, I might have a promising career
in something I need arms for.
[Annie] It's okay, Sandy.
It's Lucien Belmont.
You can let him go. I'll handle him.
[Lucien] Thank you.
[clicks tongue]
Just out of curiosity, what makes
you think that you can handle me?
I saw you at church.
Well, I do like to be on my knees.
I know. You have quite the reputation.
As do you.
[Annie] I'm sure.
So what have you heard about me exactly?
I'm dying to know.
Okay. Well,
I am not going to have sex with you.
That couldn't be in my file.
So, what are you doing?
[Lucien] Waiting.
We are elegant. We are modest.
We do not do big. We do not do flashy.
That means discreet undergarments.
Nudes, neutrals, no lace,
no obvious seams.
Remember, we are dressing
to impress our future Deltas.
Makeup should be simple.
But we will be perspiring a fair amount,
so you will want to reapply.
I do not want shine.
I do not want shimmer.
If I wanted an oily face,
I'd find a McDonald's fry cook.
[chuckles] You know your targets.
Greet them, wow them, and move them along.
But make sure they want us
so bad they can taste it.
You. Your target.
Grace Holbrook.
Brook like river, rowed crew, already D1.
You.
Cassie Carpenter. Cassie like casserole.
Mom owns a fancy vegan
cleanse meal plan service.
Good. Roll call is at five o'clock sharp.
See you all at welcome.
Miranda, hang back a second.
I have another bra.
It's not that. I need you
to add someone else to your list.
A VIP. Annie Grover.
The vice president's daughter?
Were you dropped on your head as a child?
- No. Isn't she pref'ed at Sigma?
- So?
So do we really wanna start
poaching legacies?
We're not poaching anyone.
If she happens to show up,
we have to be prepared.
Does Caroline think
This isn't about what Caroline thinks.
This is about what I think.
Run along.
[footsteps departing]
I know the way to Sigma.
You don't have to walk with me.
I have Secret Service.
Oh, we've met.
I was just trying to be a gentleman here.
Sure.
You think I fancy myself
some kind of bad boy?
I don't think a bad boy
would fancy himself anything.
[Lucien] Oh, okay.
Well, if you're gonna pretend
that everything you've heard
about me is true,
well, I guess I'll have no choice
but to do the same for you.
Oh, whatever will I do?
I don't know. I suppose continue being
the cookie-cutter little girl
that some political publicist has beaten
any shred of individuality out of.
Okay.
Seriously, your big issue
is anti-kill shelters.
And you're pro killing animals?
What do you want from me?
Nothing.
I'm finding that hard to believe.
Believe what you want.
I know what it's like to have everyone
have a preconceived notion of who you are.
Oh. This is the part where you try
to seduce me with the whole,
"we're not so different, you and I" talk?
Believe me, if I wanted to fuck you,
we'd be fucking already.
So you don't want to fuck me?
I just thought you could use a friend.
Maybe you're the one
who could use a friend.
[Lucien] Well, since you offered.
Forget the party. Inspect me instead.
[officer] That's not necessary.
All seems up to snuff with you boys.
Have a good night.
Consider me compliant, officer.
Clear! We're clear.
Fuck yeah, baby. You want a bump?
[hip-hop playing on speakers]
[sniffs]
- Scott.
- Mm-hmm? Oh, hey.
- Hey.
- You want some?
No, I'm good. Hey,
have you seen Lucien around at all?
No, I've just kind of been over here
eating hot dogs.
Yeah, that checks out.
- You enjoy.
- Thank you.
ID.
Um, she left it at home.
I know who you are. You're not 21.
Do you believe everything you read online?
Look, why don't we just say we,
um, keep this between friends?
[country music playing on speakers]
Tell your father I'm a fan.
Well, that was embarrassing.
You're not a cheap date. It's no problem.
Sometimes I just wish I wasn't who I am.
- Who would you want to be?
- [scoffs] Wouldn't you like to know?
So is this where you try
to seduce me with the whole,
"we're not so different, you and I" talk?
- [chuckles]
- What can I get you?
So, Miss Queen of Darkness, what'll it be?
Peach Julep? French 75?
Some infused mojito something?
I'll have a dirty martini.
Lady will have a dirty martini,
and I will have a strawberry daiquiri
with extra cherries, if you can.
Are you having fun?
Just trying to illustrate
that not all is always as it appears.
[chuckles]
[CeCe breathes deeply]
[CeCe sighs]
So, the Annie Grover experiment.
Is this a band you're forming?
Uh, I have my satellite people
out looking, but nobody's made contact.
Satellite people?
It's like Google Earth,
but instead of aerial photography,
it's just people around campus.
Under-the-radar people.
People you'd never notice.
I've been creating a network for years.
You're a very odd person.
Thank you.
[Caroline] Okay.
The point is, no one can find Annie.
You're not worried?
Do I look worried?
So, how's your martini?
[country music continues]
Okay, I should probably go.
To throw up
or to the Sigma Rho Nu welcome?
Are they mutually exclusive?
[Lucien chuckles]
So why Sigma?
My mother loved the sorority, and some
of her closest friends are from it.
How sweet.
What's the problem? You're in a frat.
Yeah, just not the one
my daddy made me join.
My mom's not making me do anything.
It's philanthropic, community building.
Women supporting women. Sisterhood.
I wouldn't expect you to understand.
Oh, believe me, I love sisters.
- Hmm. But?
- Why Sigma?
Is it a crime to love my parents
and want them to be proud of me?
[Lucien] No, it's just very modern.
Mmm. You don't love your family?
- What family?
- So you were raised by wolves?
No, but my mother was eaten by one.
Well, that's very sad.
Yeah, it was.
Wait, are you
I'm just not quite ready to open up
about my childhood bed-wetting
and my fear of shopping mall mannequins.
Wait, shopping mall mannequins?
- They're terrifying to me.
- Oh, my God. Right?
- Because they're all expressionless.
- And why not give them faces?
Exactly. [chuckles]
[Lucien chuckles]
Okay, so you don't want
to talk about your family.
It's complicated.
Mmm, okay. And you don't think
that little Miss Chasing Liberty
could possibly understand complicated?
Excuse me. Do I know you?
- No.
- You sure?
- 'Cause you look really familiar.
- I'm sure. You don't know me.
[Annie] Hmm.
- [sighs]
- So, do you?
- What?
- Do you know you?
- [scoffs] Um [chuckles]
- [chuckles]
["Winning" playing]
'Cause you be in yo' zone
When you winning ♪
On yo' own when you winning ♪
Look who's here!
Our Alpha Gamma sweetheart!
- [students cheer]
- We need to talk.
- [Rourke] Talk about what?
- We agreed you'd stop by.
Okay, Caroline, baby. Listen, I, uh
[Caroline] No, unfortunately,
I'm done protecting you.
I've run out of patience.
The way I see it, the only way forward is
for you to admit what you did last year.
Really? We're gonna go
through all this again?
You haven't dragged me
over the coals enough for what happened?
I'm not talking about Jenny.
I want you to admit what you really did.
I want you to admit
what you did to Scott Russell.
I tried to protect you.
- I tried to have your back.
- You know that's not what happened.
I didn't do anything.
Poor Scott really couldn't afford
to lose any more brain cells.
I was with Jenny.
Who's in Europe now and,
conveniently, a little afraid of me,
so good luck getting in touch.
You're not fucking serious.
[Caroline] I know you're upset.
You're worried about what this means.
For you, your future,
your cushy little internship at Apple.
I'm sorry. I can no longer be complicit.
You're a fucking vindictive,
jealous little cunt.
I should've known
you'd do something like this.
We could lose our chapters.
Hundreds of years of history,
legacy, down the drain.
I just don't think I can
stand idly by in silence anymore.
[chuckling]
Well, you know what I think?
I think you got nothing on me.
- [door opens, closes]
- [phone buzzes]
- What?
- It's CeCe.
[Caroline] I know.
Right. So, she's here.
- Who?
- A student life officer.
They're testing the tea.
Testing the tea?
- Someone must have reported us.
- We didn't do anything, CeCe.
Okay. But so, what do I do?
Do whatever they ask. Cooperate fully.
Give them a tour.
We're completely above board.
We have nothing to hide.
Right. But what about [sighs]you know?
- What?
- The basement girls?
What's a basement girl?
Okay. Say there are
a couple of legacies in the basement.
"There are a couple of legacies
in the basement."
No, it is not the beginning of a joke.
I am telling you there are
a couple legacies in the basement.
I'm asking for your help.
What do I do with them?
I can't make every decision for you, CeCe.
Just take care of it. I trust you.
- You do?
- No.
- Keep your phone close.
- [phone beeps]
[Rourke] Everybody get the fuck out!
All right, if you don't live here,
I don't wanna see you.
[people exclaim, laugh]
Okay! Way to show your dominance.
Fuck.
Why the one-man rendition of Stomp?
[Rourke] Look, I want her gone. [pants]
Are you and Caroline fighting again?
She's a fucking psychopath, dude.
- I want her banned from this house.
- She's the house sweetheart.
Oh, she's no fucking sweetheart.
Okay, I'm telling you I never
want to see that fucking bitch again.
You really shouldn't speak
about women like that.
He's just a little touchy
because I was just trying
to get him to finally come clean.
Cleanliness is next to godliness.
At this point, it's just sad
that he's continuing to deny
what he did to Scott at formal last year.
- See? This bitch is fucking crazy.
- Forcing all of us
to run this ridiculous cover-up
while we languish on social probation.
She's got a point.
I mean, if you cooperate, things could end
all the more simply for you.
What the fuck, man?
Everyone knows I didn't do shit to Scott.
Come out with your hands up
and maybe I can persuade the Russells
to drop any pesky assault charges.
Yeah? What does
she have on you, dude? Hmm?
- We saw you do it, dude.
- Tell the fucking truth!
Maybe you should try using
your words this time, Rourke?
[scoffs] You're fucking liars, all right?
You're liars! And if you do this to me,
if you try to take me down like this,
I swear I'm not going quiet.
All right, I have shit
on all you motherfuckers.
What's all this about, Rourke?
Lucien!
Come on, Mr. Treasurer.
You better have your fucking key.
What's going on?
I feel we've been very up-front
through this whole process,
but I need you to respect my authority
as rush chair of this sorority.
Miss, please step aside.
There are simply some places
that I cannot grant you access to
as they are sacred to the sorority.
And if you want to get past me,
you'll need a search warrant.
That won't be necessary.
Well, you tell me your next move then,
lady, because I'm staying put.
This is my Silkwood.
My Redwoods. I'm not moving.
So by all means, if you want
another Kent State on your hands
Give me your key.
Why don't we just let bygones be bygones
and go back up to the party?
Give me your fucking key, Lucien.
Okay.
If you're, uh, really sure.
Fuck you.
- Where is it?
- [clattering]
This is a huge invasion of our privacy,
and I will be filing a complaint.
I want to reiterate that there are
certain aspects of the sisterhood
that must remain confidential,
and as such, these girls have access
to very sensitive materials.
Some of them being the recipient list
of our invitation cards
Whoa! Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Hold on, hold on! Stop.
We are not going down there!
Come on! [sighs]
Oh, for crying out loud,
since when is it illegal to have
the ugly girls in the basement?
Honestly,
we're not running a sweatshop here.
[phone rings]
- [Rourke] Where the fuck is the book?
- [Lucien] You see, I'd like to help you,
it's just that, um,
I don't really want to.
- Send them.
- [Rourke] I know you two assholes have it.
It doesn't seem like they know
what you're talking about.
Where the fuck is the book?
Oh, you mean our secret book?
The one you could surely use
to incriminate us all in, well,
all manner of nefarious goings on?
That secret book?
Yeah, we simply
couldn't just tell you that.
Yeah. Would defeat the purpose
of having it actually be secret.
[chuckles, grunts]
[grunts, chuckles]
[both grunting, groaning]
[students exclaiming]
- Rourke is very violent. It's jarring.
- Yeah, he is.
[grunts]
[students cheer, exclaim]
[grunts]
I hope this isn't bringing anything
- up for you?
- [Lucien] That the best you got? Let's go!
- [students exclaim]
- [Lucien grunting]
It's just like what happened
to you last year.
- [students exclaim]
- [Rourke grunts]
- Come on! Let's go!
- Yeah!
It's so familiar.
- [students cheering]
- [person] Fight. Fight. Fight.
Campus police.
Move! Out of the way!
Scott, you don't think
that it could have been
[Rourke grunts]
It was Rourke! Rourke threw the beer can.
- What? No.
- [students murmuring]
He did this to me last year.
No. No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
Look at him. He's a fucking idiot!
They fucking set me up.
It was her. She fucked me.
- I don't fuck losers.
- [Rourke grunts]
I believe a "congratulations" is in order.
What ever are you talking about?
You can drop your act, Caroline.
We were all very happy
to dance your little Swan Lake.
And I'm free of Von Rothbart forever.
But according to Dean Sheffield,
we're still on thin ice
with very, very hot skates.
I know that.
And I'm handling it.
Thus, my continued pursuit
of Annie Grover?
So what's this really about anyway?
What everything's about.
- Power. Namely, my having it.
- Mm-hmm.
And Annie Grover will give you that?
What, did you like Annie Grover, Lucien?
Don't be stupid.
If you want Annie, you'll have her.
But that would mean
Uh, speaking of Annie,
she was a no-show at Sigma yesterday,
so the field for her bid
is actually wide open.
Sorry, I just thought you were going
to be visibly happier about that.
- It's fine.
- Well done, CeCe.
[CeCe chuckles]
Well, okay, um,
but there is also bad news.
Um, but before I tell you,
it's not as bad as it seems.
"The Greek War. Campus movement
calls for end to toxic fraternity,
sorority culture,
plus an inside look at its leaders."
[Lucien] There's no such thing
as bad publicity.
Just bad news.
You'll need to finish the job.
O Captain, my Captain.
["Wolf" playing]
I'm hungry like a wolf ♪
So, Beatrice Worth
[Beatrice]
The Greeks think they own this campus.
And some of them are worse than others.
I'm lost and I'm lonely ♪
[phone chimes]
[Annie] It's Lucien.
She in there?
Guess she's not taking visitors.
Okay. What do I need to know?
Well, okay. First off
Taste for hell ♪
Taste for hell ♪
Ooh, ooh ♪
Ooh, ooh ♪
[song ends]
[CeCe] This season on Cruel Intentions.
So, Annie rushes, and I fuck her.
And then I get to fuck you.
Yes.
[Annie's mom]
You're in a position of power.
Whatever you decide,
people will pay attention.
Try to find someone you trust.
- She's, uh, pretty special.
- [Annie] Okay!
CeCe? Where are you going?
[CeCe] Um, school. I'll be back later.
This is the new political society.
Now is the time
to level the playing field.
Take back the house!
I guess now's the fun part.
[Caroline] Tonight's the night, CeCe.
- President's Night.
- [crowd cheering]
If you were president of Alpha Gamma
What about Brian?
Hello, Mr. President.
I don't want to be
disappointed in you again.
[Caroline] I'll handle it.
You think you could help me
rub this one out?
I don't think
that's a great way to put that.
- [Caroline] What is all this?
- You said to get refreshments.
I didn't mean that kind of coke.
We'll just need to take a look
at your records.
We just use Spotify.
There are lines that we don't cross.
- [grunts]
- [Annie, Lucien chuckle]
You know perfectly well that there are
no lines between us, dear brother.