Debunking Borat (2021) s01e01 Episode Script
Vaccine Microchip
NARRATOR: Would you take
a complete stranger
in your home in the middle
of a global pandemic?
It seems like a risky decision,
but you're about to meet
two men who did just that.
The man they took in?
Borat Sagdiyev,
a disgraced journalist from
Kazakhstan who was looking
for his daughter
and a chance at redemption.
As stay-at-home orders
were issued around the country,
these men were confined together,
completely cut off
from the outside world.
Our cameras were there to capture
their unforgettable experience,
which you're about to see tonight.
This is American Lockdown.
[♪♪♪]
It's just been announced that the state
has ordered a lockdown to curb
the growing COVID infection rate,
and Jim and Jerry eagerly await
the arrival of their new housemate.
Stacey Abrams.
I tell you what.
If there's anybody that needs
to be out of politics,
that bitch needs to be gone.
Well, I was born
and raised in Montana.
I'm conservative, of course.
Gun-toting, all-American.
I don't put up with the bullshit.
She is what I would call
"radical."
Well, when she lost the
governor's race in Georgia
- Yeah.
- she wouldn't she wouldn't secede
the election.
She ain't no different than damn Pelosi
or Maxine Waters.
The Democrats, with this coronavirus
I believe that their agenda is
is to try to take over the country.
I'm not one
that's going to stand for that.
And I'm sure there's
a lot more people out here
that think just the way I do.
NARRATOR: While Jim and Jerry
finish prepping dinner,
Borat makes his way to the house.
Jagshemash! My name Borat.
I just your average guy
trying to deliver
his 15-year-old daughter
to Rudolph Giuliani.
Same old, same old.
JERRY: Watch your step.
- Hello?
- JIM: How are you?
- Yes. Yes.
- Yes.
Nice to meet you.
[GROANS]
Okay.
Yes. Very nice.
It is very nice.
NARRATOR: The men take some time
to show Borat around the house.
JIM: And then there's bathrooms all over,
- so if you need a bathroom
- BORAT: Yes.
- there's plenty of them.
- BORAT: I know how to use.
I have used a toilet seven times.
Three times successfully.
One time liquid, one time solid,
one time just brown rain
from my back pussy.
There's some beers up in here,
if you want beer.
You can get shitfaced if you want.
What? Did I get a shit on my face?
[LAUGHS]
- No. I mean get drunk.
- Ah, yes.
It's it means never mind.
- But anyway
- Yes.
Yeah, it's-it's a joke.
I, uh
want to stay here,
but I want to find my daughter.
JIM: Where is she?
I do not know.
- She, uh, run away.
- Mm-hmm.
You want this book?
- Hey!
- Take it. I hate it.
And I hate you.
And I will never see you again.
- [TIRES SCREECHING]
- No!
My daughter!
Tutar!
If I do not find her,
my government
- they will take two cow
- JIM: Right.
attach chain to my leg
attached to the cow,
the cow will follow a Uzbek
- with a turnip in his anoos.
- JERRY: Mm-hmm.
Try to eat it.
- Pull me apart.
- Mm.
And I must walk on my chram
- for the rest of my life.
- Yeah. Yeah.
Hmm.
Well, I'm a little confused on this one,
how we would help you with that.
Um um
How long must we be stuck in here?
JIM: Well, don't know for sure.
Till this COVID-19 thing passes.
- Are you familiar with that?
- No. What is this?
Okay, that is a virus
that was, um
It was developed in China.
Wuhan, China.
- Are you familiar with that place?
- What a Wuhan?
- At a lab in Wuhan, China.
- No. What?
They made a virus that kills people.
So that means that you have
to be locked down,
you can't go out.
Um, and
Uh, what else is there?
- What I would say is
- BORAT: Yes.
your Democrats are trying to brainwash people.
They're saying
that we shouldn't be at work,
and I feel like, that they
helped the Chinese create this.
- JIM: Correct.
- JERRY: The Democrats
it's nowhere near as bad
as what they claim it is.
If it was, hundreds of thousands
of people would be dead already.
I think with the Democrats and with Obama,
and I think it goes back
to the Clintons,
- when they were also in office.
- This Clinton
they make this plague?
- JERRY: Yes.
- Yes.
- Not nice.
- Clintons are very evil.
Extremely evil.
Supposedly, they torture these kids.
Well, what it does is it,
um, it gets their adrenaline flowing
- in their body.
- BORAT: Mm-hmm.
Then they take that
out of their adrenal glands,
and then they drink their blood
or that that out of their
JERRY: I've heard about things like that.
Uh, Hillary Clinton drink the,
uh, blood of children?
- That's what we've heard.
- Yes?
- I've heard.
- It's it's been said.
So, probably is true.
- I wouldn't doubt it.
- Well, it could very well be.
I don't know how much
you know about Bill Gates.
- Bill Gates?
- JIM: You know these pallets of bricks
- that are being thrown at the cops?
- Yeah.
You know who owns that?
- Bill Gates.
- JERRY: Yeah.
Bill Gates makes gates?
He makes bricks.
Why is he not called Bill Bricks?
Because he made computers,
but he owns a big stake
Why he not called Bill Computers?
Uh, because his name was Gates.
What do you think about
what the Bill Gates
and what, uh, the virus?
I mean, the vaccine?
I refuse.
It's not going to happen.
It's like they've been
he's been running
- the chip in Africa.
- JIM: Mm-hmm.
- BORAT: Yes.
- And testing it over there
through vaccines.
I understand when he did a bunch
of those vaccines over there,
he killed a bunch of people with them.
Nobody is going to change
my mind about
about the way I feel about things,
and, uh, like I say, I've gotten
stronger in my convictions.
With a lot of the vaccines
they're doing over there
- JIM: Mm-hmm.
- that he's putting the chips in,
- experimenting to see
- In the oil?
- No. In the vaccine shots.
- JIM: In the people.
- Put the chip in the needle?
- Yes.
- JIM: Yes.
- And where they put the fish?
- There's no fish.
- JIM: There's no fish.
But fish and chip. It's nice.
- It's it's, uh, the chip
- BORAT: In England.
- Not in America. Fish and chip.
- Okay.
- Right.
- In America, just the chip.
Hamburger.
I suppose we better
wind her down for the night
and go to bed.
Well, you get some rest.
- Thank you very much.
- You betcha.
- Good night.
- We'll see you in the morning.
- BORAT: Yes.
- Good night, buddy. Yep.
- What?
- JERRY: Good night.
BORAT: Ah, yes. Good night.
Good night, bud.
- What?
- JIM: Good night.
- Good night.
- JIM: Sleep good.
- BORAT: Thank you.
- Mm-hmm.
Hmm?
Talk to you tomorrow.
- Oh. Okay.
- All right, buddy.
What do you say?
Okay.
- Okay.
- Talk to you tomorrow.
I did not hear.
Talk to you tomorrow.
- Talk to you tomorrow about
- JIM: Yep.
- Mm-hmm.
- BORAT: Okay.
- Tomorrow.
- See you in the morning.
- What?
- See you in the morning. Good night.
Good night. Thank you.
All right.
What?
NARRATOR: It's day two in the lockdown house,
and the boys are making breakfast.
JIM: It says on here, uh,
the majority of people don't
don't, uh, support using
taxpayer money for reparations
but half of the black people do.
- Imagine that.
- [JERRY CHUCKLES]
That's something like
I've always said and thought.
Man, I wish to hell
I could have my own damn TV show
where I could talk
about certain things and
Yeah, I'd like to have a blog
JERRY: Put certain things on the air
- that a lot of these stations won't.
- JIM: Yeah. Absolutely.
I would like to open a conservative site.
You know, to compete
against Google and whatnot.
- He was Good morning.
- BORAT: Morning.
What this?
This is a thing called Alexa.
And we tell her what we want,
- and she gets it.
- Hmm?
Then they deliver it to the house.
- Yeah.
- ALEXA: Hmm. I don't know that.
There is a woman in here?
- Uh, no.
- BORAT: So a wizard
- did not shrink a woman? - NO, NO, NO, NO.
- JERRY: No.
- Ah. There is no woman in there.
- No, no.
- JERRY: No.
- What about a fairy?
JIM & JERRY: No.
No such thing as a fairy.
Mm.
Okay.
Say, let me see this list here.
JIM: Okay.
Oh, yeah. We need some
I need some Diet Coke.
- So some what? Diet Coke?
- Diet Coke. Yeah.
So, you want the brown bottle beer?
- Mm.
- Okay. Alexa.
I need a six-pack
of Bud Light Longnecks.
Can you get that?
ALEXA: The top result is
foldable Bluetooth headset,
AIRPRO lightweight retractable
Bluetooth headphones
- for sports and exercise.
- Where'd that come from?
- What this woman talk about?
- ALEXA: $29.98.
With delivery by July 1st.
I added it to your Amazon cart for review.
To purchase, say "Buy it now."
Cancel order.
Alexa, cancel order.
ALEXA: Your last Amazon order cannot be canceled.
For details, go to Your Orders on Amazon.
Maybe she is angry
because she want that you
let her out a bit from her cage.
This tiny woman Alexa
that Jim and Jerry have capture
have very alluring voice.
Wawaweewa.
I think she is make a flirt on me.
Because we are locking down,
very important
to, uh, release fluid
- from your chram.
- Mm-hmm.
Very important not to keep
the testes such a liquid because
it make you aggressive like a bull.
Um
So, um
Okay.
I know very much about being
locked inside with mens.
After all, I was put in jail
for making my last movie film.
During the trial of it,
I was found guilty
of many hate crimes as well,
which got my sentenced
reduced by 70 years.
Men in jail
if they do not, uh,
release the liquid by themselves,
they either very fighting
or they try to make sexy time
on the other men.
- Oh, no.
- Can we please agree
we will not make bang-bang-bang
in each other's anoos?
- [JIM SPUTTERS]
- JERRY: We can agree on that.
- I'm with you, brother.
- BORAT: Good.
- JERRY: We can agree.
- Yeah, don't even
Yeah.
- No.
- JIM: Oh, my God.
BORAT: I swear to you
that I will not make,
uh, sexy time
in any your anoos or mouth
or west ear or east ear
or west nostril or east nostril.
I swear.
I swear the same thing.
I very worried that Tom and Jerry
are going to make entry of me,
so I take precautions.
I going to place this
inside entrance of my anoos.
If they try to make entry,
it will shatter
and the tweeting of the bird
inside will alert me.
NARRATOR: It's day three,
and Borat is checking
to see if his egg is intact.
Great success.
You have not been broken.
I will return you to refrigerator.
Mmm.
BORAT: Very important
when you are in lockdown to exercise.
In accordance with Kazakh law,
I normally exercise totally nude,
but so as not to arouse my buddies,
I will wear something over my chram.
You know, I refuse to take part
in mail-in ballots.
- It's just bullshit.
- Right?
It's the easiest way for them to cheat,
- and they're going to do it if they can.
- Yeah.
If we let 'em get away with it,
then that's what's gonna happen.
Protestors gathered in
front of what they claimed was
a Washington, D.C. councilman's
home Thursday night
to call for more substantial
police reforms and budget cuts.
JIM: Really?
So they're going to his house?
- Yeah.
- [BORAT STRAINING]
I'll guarantee you one thing.
If I were,
if they were, if they were
in my front yard,
I'd be standing out there
- with my AR.
- Right?
And I'd be saying, the first one
that steps over the line is done.
- Right?
- I'd do it.
[SIGHS]
Huh. Wow.
BORAT: I very happy to be
a lockdown with my buddies.
Yep.
It makes it easier.
What music you like?
- Country music.
- BORAT: Oh!
- I know country song.
- Yeah?
You want?
- You can play?
- Yes.
- JERRY: Oh.
- BORAT: A little bit.
Yeah. Let's hear it.
[SINGING IN KAZAKH]
Pretty good.
Very good.
I like it.
- You know this song?
- JIM: No.
- No.
- BORAT: It's about
- very bad people in my country.
- Mm-hmm.
Trying to stop people's freedom.
That's exactly what
we're talking about.
So, who would it be in
if I decide to do this in America?
Obama would be really great.
- BORAT: Ah. Oh
- Hillary Clinton.
Hillary Clinton ♪
- She's a pain in the ass.
- BORAT: Hillary Clinton ♪
Pain in the ass ♪
- Right.
- BORAT: Then I always ♪
What?
She can kiss my ass.
BORAT: Hillary Clinton,
pain in the ass ♪
- Yeah.
- BORAT: She can really ♪
- Clean my ass ♪
- JERRY: Yeah.
- JIM: Sounds good to me.
- [BORAT LAUGHS LOUDLY]
Obama was a traitor.
Obama was a traitor ♪
America, he did hate her.
- Yeah.
- BORAT: America, he hate her ♪
- There you go. That's good. I like that.
- Yeah, that's good.
- That's good.
- Say, "You can put 'em in jail."
We must put them in jail ♪
- Yep.
- Is he in jail?
No, but I hope so soon.
Should we dance?
- No. That's okay.
- JERRY: No.
JERRY: Good night.
Alexa, who trap you in this tower?
Was it Jim or Jerry?
I think it was Jerry.
He have a wizard's beard.
ALEXA: Hmm. I don't know that.
Why you say you do not know that, Alexa?
ALEXA: Hmm. I'm not sure.
Why not?
ALEXA: There are some things
that I just can't do yet.
And explaining why
is one of those things.
Is it because your brain
is small like chicken?
This is not a deal breaker for me.
BORAT: Alexa, if I stroke your
tower, can you feel it inside?
ALEXA: Hmm.
I don't know that one.
JERRY: What in the fuck?
BORAT: Alexa, enough talking.
Let make sexy time.
NARRATOR: It's day four.
Jim has taken it upon himself
to write new lyrics for Borat's song.
It's called
"The Chinese Virus Song."
- Yes.
- JIM: All right.
Obama
is a traitor.
America, he does hate her.
In jail he should be,
so Americans can see
what a piece of shit he'll always be.
- [LAUGHTER]
- BORAT: Yes. Yeah.
- JIM: Hillary
- He eats the shit.
- Yeah.
- JIM: Hillary Clinton tried
and tried to beat Trump and get
her and got her ass fried.
Now we have Biden,
who the media is saying
his lead is beginning to widen.
In the basement he shall remain.
If he comes out to work,
it'll prove he has no, uh, perk.
- Yes. Very good poetry.
- JERRY: Yeah.
- Yeah.
- JIM: Yeah.
How many more days
I can stay with you buddies?
Well, we'll just have
to see how things go.
Best time I had in last 14 years.
- I've learned a lot from you.
- JERRY: Yeah.
I've learned a lot
about your guys's country.
- Thank you.
- Which kind of scares me
a little bit because
the people in our country
want to go that direction,
and you tell me what's happening
in your country.
- That should wake anybody up.
- JERRY: Yeah.
If you let this Biden win,
soon you will have torture of
people pulling them by cows,
- pulling their legs apart, and their chrams
- Yes.
- slice in two like a pebble.
- Yeah.
We look at
a gentleman that came from a
communist country, essentially.
From my perspective,
listening to that makes me even stronger
in my convictions
Ow! Wawaweewa!
that I don't want that.
How do you think about Trump
and what he's trying to do?
- I think he's a glorious leader.
- Yeah?
- Right.
- Also, that he is ladies' man.
That he grab a pussy.
- Yes.
- Yes.
Our Premier Nazarbayev, he grab a lot.
- Yes.
- JIM: Well, yeah. I suppose.
- He allowed to.
- JIM: He can do whatever he wants, right?
Why not?
Well, in America
you can't do that to women.
Hmm. Why not?
Um, because
women are equal to men.
We believe that women can, um,
do whatever we want, they can
think the way that we do.
The women here have rights.
What?!
They can do whatever they want.
They have a brain like we have a brain.
- They can speak.
- JIM: Yes.
They can do things like us,
like a man does.
These liberal snowflakes have
crazy ideas about womens.
But the brain is different, is smaller
- to allow the room for the baby.
- JIM: No.
No. A woman's brain is not.
- But the brain's smaller, so the baby
- JIM: The baby
starts very small and get bigger
and then go down.
- JIM: No, no.
- JERRY: No.
- BORAT: Until it in the belly.
- JERRY: No, that starts here.
It starts down there.
It doesn't start in their brain.
It all starts in the belly.
- Wawaweewa. Very interesting.
- JERRY: So, is this what
- y'all's government tells y'all?
- Yes.
They give a book on this.
Wow.
- That's crazy.
- BORAT: Yeah. I show you.
Um, yes
Uh, so you have a daughter?
Does the government automatically give you
one of these?
When she born, you are given
instruction booklet
made by the Ministry
of Agriculture and Wildlife.
JIM: Wow.
That's insane.
They do show that.
BORAT: So, the man go inside,
and there are canal
that go to the brain.
- That's not true.
- They have that in there?
- They're showing that diagram?
- They have it in here.
They actually have it in here.
It actually shows it.
- Holy shit.
- No shit.
This is not true.
- BORAT: Really?
- Yes. It's absolutely false.
BORAT: Because this is the
- No. It's not true.
- JERRY: Holy cow.
- JIM: Isn't that crazy?
- JERRY: That is.
- BORAT: Why is this cr
- JIM: Look at that.
JERRY: I didn’t see those a while ago
- when I looked through there.
- JIM: Holy crud.
This is Dr. Yamak.
This is latest medical research.
No, it's not.
It's not even close.
It's it is such a stupid idea.
It's just, um
It's hard for me to fathom that
anybody would even think of it.
This is supposed to be the doctors
with delivery of the baby?
BORAT: Yes.
The doctor wait
for the baby to fall out,
and you have two other doctor do this.
- Well, you don't need that, no.
- One in anoos, one in mouth.
JIM: This is not true.
Now, what is this?
This is when a woman have,
um the blood.
This is how she insert the mouse inside.
JIM: The mouse?
BORAT: The mouse to take the blood.
- What?
- The the blood.
So, when she's having
her menstrual period?
- Moon blood. Yes.
- Then you use a mouse?
Yes.
Holy shit.
What you have shown us
and explained to us,
- we're sitting here like, "What?"
- JIM: Yeah.
You were looking at this
and thinking "What?"
- Yeah.
- JIM: We, we look at this
- You look at this and think "What?"
- Yeah.
- This and think "What?"
- We look at this and think it's
it's a lie. That's a
It's a conspiracy theory.
So the same thing you're thinking
about what we're telling you
is what we think about this,
or I do.
Can we do something?
Can I take you over there to the computer?
- Or we'll take you over to the computer.
- Sure.
And we will show you how it's done.
How-how we're taught.
Is that okay?
- Yes.
- Okay. Let's do that.
- JERRY: And we can probably show
- JIM: And that way
we can try and teach you
what we we know.
Okay. Where is it?
Wait. What is this?
JERRY: Oh, that's just a crazy
white-headed old man
they call "Sleepy Joe."
- BORAT: Yes. Hold hold on.
- JIM: Yeah.
Hold on. Whoa-whoa
- Mm-hmm.
- Wait, wait, wait.
This look like Tutar.
Her hair different, but
this her, this Tutar.
JIM: Anti-shutdown campaigners
Ashley and Adam Smith
talk about why the country
needs to be opened back up.
Do you think it's too much control?
This her, this her.
Are you sure that's her?
This is her.
This is my un-male son.
Where are your pictures?
Can I see your pictures of her, please?
Okay. Just a minute.
There are more pictures I have.
Wait, wait, wait.
You know what?
I'll be goddamned if it isn't her.
It does look like it.
It does look like it with her
- JIM: Look at that.
- And the accent.
And the same
- She's from a socialist country.
- Let me see. Okay.
- It's okay, it's okay. Settle down.
- Okay, buddies.
- That's the best one we got.
- This her.
JIM: Holy shit. Look at that.
- BORAT: This her.
- JERRY: That is her.
It's her.
It's her.
I'll be fucked, but that's her.
This is her.
Let me look under
JIM: That is fucking her.
- That is her.
- It her.
- That is her.
- It her. It her!
JERRY: Yeah.
That's got to be her.
- I mean, look at her.
- Screw me in the anoos. This her.
Do you think it's too much control?
But why she asking them questions?
She's doing journalist work.
She is a She is a journalist?
If that is her, yes.
Coming from a socialist country,
uh, and
I know what is socialist
and what socialist government can do.
But it not possible
for woman to be journalist.
- Yes, it is.
- The brain, the brain, uh
No, no. You have to forget
about that stuff
- for a minute, okay?
- Okay.
Because she can do that, okay?
She can do what you said
she couldn't do.
All right?
So if you understand that.
Because you see it
with your own eyes that
- she's doing it, correct?
- JERRY: Regardless
of what your government says,
it is an instinct inside you
that you have to be
proud of your child,
to love your child.
- It is natural to love your daughter?
- BOTH: Yes.
- JERRY: Yes.
- JIM: Of course.
Why not?
Because a daughter is, uh
- You have a man
- You still don't
a horse, a kratzouli, a woman
- No. Let me put it to you
- and then
- [SPEAKS KAZAKH, CLICKS TONGUE]
- No.
You have a man,
you have a woman.
No. Man, horse
No.
- Uh, mongoose.
- Man. If you're going
- to get your daughter back
- Kratzouli, daughter.
If you're going to get
your daughter back,
you have a man,
you have a woman.
Okay? They're on the same level.
- The same?
- Then you have a horse below that.
- Horse below the woman?
- Then whatever else
Yes. Then whatever else you just said.
I don't even know
what half of that stuff is.
Man. Woman.
Kratzouli?
Man and woman are together.
- Horse? Horse?
- Everything No.
No. Horse is down here.
Man and woman are up here.
- Horse.
- No.
Hawk?
- Everything is below
- Woman above hawk?
Okay, now, let's
let's finish this thing up.
TUTAR: What do you think is
the most dangerous disease?
Coronavirus or socialism?
Definitely, uh, socialism.
Definitely.
Socialism by far.
Absolutely.
She's She did a very good job.
I think you should be
very, very proud.
I have three daughters.
That's all I have.
I love all three of them.
So, yes.
You have to love your kids.
That's what God gave them to you for.
BORAT: My heart feel strange.
Maybe a cat has laid an egg in me.
TUTAR: Join me here on Saturday.
I will be reporting live
from the state's biggest
Shit.
What, what, what?
Where is she?
The 27th. March for Our Rights rally.
I got to get a pen
that fucking works here.
I just want to write
this shit down, okay?
- The March for
- JERRY: For Our Rights.
JIM: Our Rights rally.
- Saturday, June 27th.
- That's tomorrow.
- What? It's tomorrow?
- It's tomorrow.
Please, please. Can we go?
Buddy, buddy, buddy,
please, buddy.
We'll-we'll try and figure out
how to make it work.
But it's probably
less than an hour away.
- She is close?
- BOTH: Yes.
- JIM: Yes.
- Please. We go.
Can we go out of lockdown and find her?
I would think so.
- But if she see me
- I know. That's what I just said.
Then she will run
the moment she see my face.
Okay. You have to change your appearance.
Do something different with your hair.
- BORAT: Yes.
- Wear different clothes.
You think I should change
- my appearance?
- JERRY: Yes.
I am nervous.
That's So are we. It's okay.
- It's okay to be nervous.
- It's okay to be nervous.
SPEAKER: We got to get up and fight
for this beautiful country
of the United States of America.
I don't see very many masks out there.
That makes you That makes you
instant criminals right now.
They want to throw you in jail
for what you're doing
right here, right now.
You understand that?
They're relying that you guys
continue to shut up
and sit in your house
like good little subjects.
- We will not comply.
- [CHEERING]
- MAN: Will not comply!
- SPEAKER: Now you're talking!
I going to head up to stage
to see where she is.
SPEAKER: We've got to get up
and fight, guys.
God bless each
and every single one of you.
EMCEE: All right. We've got
some great music coming up.
Y'all ready?
[CHEERING]
Ladies and gentlemen,
please welcome your next act.
Country Steve!
[CHEERING]
Are you Country Steve?
Mm.
- [AMERICAN ACCENT] You bet your asshole I am.
- Great.
- There he is.
- Oh, my gosh. Look at him.
[BOTH LAUGH]
JIM: He's doing it.
I can't believe he's doing it.
BORAT: So I am looking out
on this very diverse crowd
with every shade of white,
but how will I entertain them?
I wrote this song
with my two best buddies.
[GUITAR PLAYING]
BORAT: Yeah. Very nice.
Obama was a traitor ♪
America, he hate her ♪
He belong inside the jails ♪
I ain't lying,
it ain't no jokes ♪
Corona is a liberal hoax ♪
Corona is a liberal hoax ♪
- [CHEERING, APPLAUSE]
- Yes.
Obama, what we gonna do? ♪
Inject him with the Wuhan flu ♪
Inject him with the Wuhan flu ♪
- Let hear it!
- [CHEERING]
Dr. Fauci, what we gonna do? ♪
Inject him with the Wuhan flu ♪
Inject him with the Wuhan flu ♪
That's a song we wrote, uh
- It's a song we wrote.
- All right.
So I am the middle of a pandemic
in front of a crowd of singing,
maskless QAnon supporters,
all waving machine guns.
I've never felt safer.
USA is the best ♪
We don't need no COVID test ♪
You're not going
to take away my rights ♪
[CHEERING]
I don't care about your race ♪
Take that mask right off your face ♪
Take the mask off your commie face ♪
Mask wearers,
what we gonna do? ♪
Inject them with the Wuhan flu ♪
Inject them with the Wuhan flu ♪
[CHEERING]
I could stay onstage cheering people up
with my racist song all day long,
but I must find Tutar
before she fall in love with one
of these handsome patriots.
Over there. She's over there.
She's over there to the right ♪
Yes.
CNN, they spread fake news ♪
They're controlled
by the you-know-whos ♪
George Soros and his Nazi friends ♪
Anderson Cooper is a liar ♪
His traitor panties,
they are on fire ♪
His panties, they are on fire ♪
Okay, journalists.
Are we going to inject them
with the Wuhan flu?
Or chop 'em up like the Saudis do?
Okay. Let's hear it.
Who wants to inject them
with the Wuhan flu?
[SCATTERED CHEERS]
Who wants to chop 'em up
like the Saudis do?
[LOUD CHEERING]
Journalists, what we gonna do? ♪
Chop them up like the Saudis do ♪
INTERVIEWEE: Um, he's been
doing a really good job.
And the-the coronavirus just
happened to come along and
JIM: Excuse me.
Can I talk to you?
Are you guys fans of Bill Gates?
[BOOING]
I hate Bill Gates,
let's turn him off ♪
His penis is Microsoft ♪
He wants to inject us with microchips ♪
They're going to take two cows,
and they're going to tie them to his
tie ropes to his legs,
and they're going to give them turnips
and they're going
to pull him apart by his legs.
That's how they're going to kill him.
What should we do with scientists?
Let's hear it
for "feed them to the bears."
Yeah!
Let's hear it for
"gas them up like the Germans."
[CHEERING]
Okay, let's do "gas them up."
Tell him that I will do it.
Your father wanted you
to have the book back.
Thank you very much.
My name Country Steve.
These were the best five days of my life.
As I said goodbye to my buddies,
I wish them very good luck
with upcoming election.
If Biden wins
we're we're going to have
anarchy in the streets.
I think that the Democrat party
politicians in general
have underestimated
the American people.
And if there is a problem
with the election
um
I'm not going to say
there won't be shooting
because there very well could be.
Um
Now, would that be my choice?
No.
Um
If I thought I had to, yes.
Luckily, Jim and Jerry have promised
to meet up with me again
on January the 6th
outside the Capitol.
Chenqui.
We're number one ♪
We're number one ♪
And we've been first ♪
This election was rigged.
Everybody knows it.
[CLAMORING]
We're number one ♪
You ain't serving the Constitution!
[SHOUTING]
Ooh ♪
We're number one ♪
We're number one ♪
Greta Thunberg lied to us all ♪
About the Earth
being shaped like a ball ♪
[SHOUTING INDISTINCTLY]
[CROWD CHANTING]
USA! USA!
Okay, thank you.
Thank you, thank you, thank you.
CROWD: USA! USA!
USA! USA!
MAN: Let's go, guys, let's go.
Let's go.
- CROWD: USA! USA!
- Shit. Are we locked?
MAN: The doors are locked?
- MAN #2: You should sit down.
- MAN: Yeah.
- [CROWD CLAMORING]
- [BANGING]
[DOOR OPENS]
MAN: No. Hold it.
- CROWD: USA! USA! USA!
- [BANGING]
USA! USA!
Go, go, go. Go.
Go. Just drive.
Drive. Drive, sir, please.
[ENGINE STARTS]
Oh, are there sirens, yeah?
MAN: Yep.
COHEN: Are we okay?
MAN: Yeah, Dale, I'm in the ambulance.
Yeah, that was scary.
Just keep going, sir.
The only way you'll get in trouble
- is if you stop.
- MAN: You tell me.
And then you're going to be
in a violent situation.
MAN: Right.
We can't shoot more, right?
They'd try to kill us.
- Right.
- Yeah.
Is everyone else okay?
- MAN #2: I have no idea
- Check everyone
MAN: Dale, let me know
when everyone is out and okay.
NARRATOR: Would you take
a complete stranger
in your home in the middle
of a global pandemic?
It seems like a risky decision,
but you're about to meet
two men who did just that.
The man they took in?
Borat Sagdiyev,
a disgraced journalist from
Kazakhstan who was looking
for his daughter
and a chance at redemption.
As stay-at-home orders
were issued around the country,
these men were confined together,
completely cut off
from the outside world.
Our cameras were there to capture
their unforgettable experience,
which you're about to see tonight.
This is American Lockdown.
[♪♪♪]
It's just been announced that the state
has ordered a lockdown to curb
the growing COVID infection rate,
and Jim and Jerry eagerly await
the arrival of their new housemate.
Stacey Abrams.
I tell you what.
If there's anybody that needs
to be out of politics,
that bitch needs to be gone.
Well, I was born
and raised in Montana.
I'm conservative, of course.
Gun-toting, all-American.
I don't put up with the bullshit.
She is what I would call
"radical."
Well, when she lost the
governor's race in Georgia
- Yeah.
- she wouldn't she wouldn't secede
the election.
She ain't no different than damn Pelosi
or Maxine Waters.
The Democrats, with this coronavirus
I believe that their agenda is
is to try to take over the country.
I'm not one
that's going to stand for that.
And I'm sure there's
a lot more people out here
that think just the way I do.
NARRATOR: While Jim and Jerry
finish prepping dinner,
Borat makes his way to the house.
Jagshemash! My name Borat.
I just your average guy
trying to deliver
his 15-year-old daughter
to Rudolph Giuliani.
Same old, same old.
JERRY: Watch your step.
- Hello?
- JIM: How are you?
- Yes. Yes.
- Yes.
Nice to meet you.
[GROANS]
Okay.
Yes. Very nice.
It is very nice.
NARRATOR: The men take some time
to show Borat around the house.
JIM: And then there's bathrooms all over,
- so if you need a bathroom
- BORAT: Yes.
- there's plenty of them.
- BORAT: I know how to use.
I have used a toilet seven times.
Three times successfully.
One time liquid, one time solid,
one time just brown rain
from my back pussy.
There's some beers up in here,
if you want beer.
You can get shitfaced if you want.
What? Did I get a shit on my face?
[LAUGHS]
- No. I mean get drunk.
- Ah, yes.
It's it means never mind.
- But anyway
- Yes.
Yeah, it's-it's a joke.
I, uh
want to stay here,
but I want to find my daughter.
JIM: Where is she?
I do not know.
- She, uh, run away.
- Mm-hmm.
You want this book?
- Hey!
- Take it. I hate it.
And I hate you.
And I will never see you again.
- [TIRES SCREECHING]
- No!
My daughter!
Tutar!
If I do not find her,
my government
- they will take two cow
- JIM: Right.
attach chain to my leg
attached to the cow,
the cow will follow a Uzbek
- with a turnip in his anoos.
- JERRY: Mm-hmm.
Try to eat it.
- Pull me apart.
- Mm.
And I must walk on my chram
- for the rest of my life.
- Yeah. Yeah.
Hmm.
Well, I'm a little confused on this one,
how we would help you with that.
Um um
How long must we be stuck in here?
JIM: Well, don't know for sure.
Till this COVID-19 thing passes.
- Are you familiar with that?
- No. What is this?
Okay, that is a virus
that was, um
It was developed in China.
Wuhan, China.
- Are you familiar with that place?
- What a Wuhan?
- At a lab in Wuhan, China.
- No. What?
They made a virus that kills people.
So that means that you have
to be locked down,
you can't go out.
Um, and
Uh, what else is there?
- What I would say is
- BORAT: Yes.
your Democrats are trying to brainwash people.
They're saying
that we shouldn't be at work,
and I feel like, that they
helped the Chinese create this.
- JIM: Correct.
- JERRY: The Democrats
it's nowhere near as bad
as what they claim it is.
If it was, hundreds of thousands
of people would be dead already.
I think with the Democrats and with Obama,
and I think it goes back
to the Clintons,
- when they were also in office.
- This Clinton
they make this plague?
- JERRY: Yes.
- Yes.
- Not nice.
- Clintons are very evil.
Extremely evil.
Supposedly, they torture these kids.
Well, what it does is it,
um, it gets their adrenaline flowing
- in their body.
- BORAT: Mm-hmm.
Then they take that
out of their adrenal glands,
and then they drink their blood
or that that out of their
JERRY: I've heard about things like that.
Uh, Hillary Clinton drink the,
uh, blood of children?
- That's what we've heard.
- Yes?
- I've heard.
- It's it's been said.
So, probably is true.
- I wouldn't doubt it.
- Well, it could very well be.
I don't know how much
you know about Bill Gates.
- Bill Gates?
- JIM: You know these pallets of bricks
- that are being thrown at the cops?
- Yeah.
You know who owns that?
- Bill Gates.
- JERRY: Yeah.
Bill Gates makes gates?
He makes bricks.
Why is he not called Bill Bricks?
Because he made computers,
but he owns a big stake
Why he not called Bill Computers?
Uh, because his name was Gates.
What do you think about
what the Bill Gates
and what, uh, the virus?
I mean, the vaccine?
I refuse.
It's not going to happen.
It's like they've been
he's been running
- the chip in Africa.
- JIM: Mm-hmm.
- BORAT: Yes.
- And testing it over there
through vaccines.
I understand when he did a bunch
of those vaccines over there,
he killed a bunch of people with them.
Nobody is going to change
my mind about
about the way I feel about things,
and, uh, like I say, I've gotten
stronger in my convictions.
With a lot of the vaccines
they're doing over there
- JIM: Mm-hmm.
- that he's putting the chips in,
- experimenting to see
- In the oil?
- No. In the vaccine shots.
- JIM: In the people.
- Put the chip in the needle?
- Yes.
- JIM: Yes.
- And where they put the fish?
- There's no fish.
- JIM: There's no fish.
But fish and chip. It's nice.
- It's it's, uh, the chip
- BORAT: In England.
- Not in America. Fish and chip.
- Okay.
- Right.
- In America, just the chip.
Hamburger.
I suppose we better
wind her down for the night
and go to bed.
Well, you get some rest.
- Thank you very much.
- You betcha.
- Good night.
- We'll see you in the morning.
- BORAT: Yes.
- Good night, buddy. Yep.
- What?
- JERRY: Good night.
BORAT: Ah, yes. Good night.
Good night, bud.
- What?
- JIM: Good night.
- Good night.
- JIM: Sleep good.
- BORAT: Thank you.
- Mm-hmm.
Hmm?
Talk to you tomorrow.
- Oh. Okay.
- All right, buddy.
What do you say?
Okay.
- Okay.
- Talk to you tomorrow.
I did not hear.
Talk to you tomorrow.
- Talk to you tomorrow about
- JIM: Yep.
- Mm-hmm.
- BORAT: Okay.
- Tomorrow.
- See you in the morning.
- What?
- See you in the morning. Good night.
Good night. Thank you.
All right.
What?
NARRATOR: It's day two in the lockdown house,
and the boys are making breakfast.
JIM: It says on here, uh,
the majority of people don't
don't, uh, support using
taxpayer money for reparations
but half of the black people do.
- Imagine that.
- [JERRY CHUCKLES]
That's something like
I've always said and thought.
Man, I wish to hell
I could have my own damn TV show
where I could talk
about certain things and
Yeah, I'd like to have a blog
JERRY: Put certain things on the air
- that a lot of these stations won't.
- JIM: Yeah. Absolutely.
I would like to open a conservative site.
You know, to compete
against Google and whatnot.
- He was Good morning.
- BORAT: Morning.
What this?
This is a thing called Alexa.
And we tell her what we want,
- and she gets it.
- Hmm?
Then they deliver it to the house.
- Yeah.
- ALEXA: Hmm. I don't know that.
There is a woman in here?
- Uh, no.
- BORAT: So a wizard
- did not shrink a woman? - NO, NO, NO, NO.
- JERRY: No.
- Ah. There is no woman in there.
- No, no.
- JERRY: No.
- What about a fairy?
JIM & JERRY: No.
No such thing as a fairy.
Mm.
Okay.
Say, let me see this list here.
JIM: Okay.
Oh, yeah. We need some
I need some Diet Coke.
- So some what? Diet Coke?
- Diet Coke. Yeah.
So, you want the brown bottle beer?
- Mm.
- Okay. Alexa.
I need a six-pack
of Bud Light Longnecks.
Can you get that?
ALEXA: The top result is
foldable Bluetooth headset,
AIRPRO lightweight retractable
Bluetooth headphones
- for sports and exercise.
- Where'd that come from?
- What this woman talk about?
- ALEXA: $29.98.
With delivery by July 1st.
I added it to your Amazon cart for review.
To purchase, say "Buy it now."
Cancel order.
Alexa, cancel order.
ALEXA: Your last Amazon order cannot be canceled.
For details, go to Your Orders on Amazon.
Maybe she is angry
because she want that you
let her out a bit from her cage.
This tiny woman Alexa
that Jim and Jerry have capture
have very alluring voice.
Wawaweewa.
I think she is make a flirt on me.
Because we are locking down,
very important
to, uh, release fluid
- from your chram.
- Mm-hmm.
Very important not to keep
the testes such a liquid because
it make you aggressive like a bull.
Um
So, um
Okay.
I know very much about being
locked inside with mens.
After all, I was put in jail
for making my last movie film.
During the trial of it,
I was found guilty
of many hate crimes as well,
which got my sentenced
reduced by 70 years.
Men in jail
if they do not, uh,
release the liquid by themselves,
they either very fighting
or they try to make sexy time
on the other men.
- Oh, no.
- Can we please agree
we will not make bang-bang-bang
in each other's anoos?
- [JIM SPUTTERS]
- JERRY: We can agree on that.
- I'm with you, brother.
- BORAT: Good.
- JERRY: We can agree.
- Yeah, don't even
Yeah.
- No.
- JIM: Oh, my God.
BORAT: I swear to you
that I will not make,
uh, sexy time
in any your anoos or mouth
or west ear or east ear
or west nostril or east nostril.
I swear.
I swear the same thing.
I very worried that Tom and Jerry
are going to make entry of me,
so I take precautions.
I going to place this
inside entrance of my anoos.
If they try to make entry,
it will shatter
and the tweeting of the bird
inside will alert me.
NARRATOR: It's day three,
and Borat is checking
to see if his egg is intact.
Great success.
You have not been broken.
I will return you to refrigerator.
Mmm.
BORAT: Very important
when you are in lockdown to exercise.
In accordance with Kazakh law,
I normally exercise totally nude,
but so as not to arouse my buddies,
I will wear something over my chram.
You know, I refuse to take part
in mail-in ballots.
- It's just bullshit.
- Right?
It's the easiest way for them to cheat,
- and they're going to do it if they can.
- Yeah.
If we let 'em get away with it,
then that's what's gonna happen.
Protestors gathered in
front of what they claimed was
a Washington, D.C. councilman's
home Thursday night
to call for more substantial
police reforms and budget cuts.
JIM: Really?
So they're going to his house?
- Yeah.
- [BORAT STRAINING]
I'll guarantee you one thing.
If I were,
if they were, if they were
in my front yard,
I'd be standing out there
- with my AR.
- Right?
And I'd be saying, the first one
that steps over the line is done.
- Right?
- I'd do it.
[SIGHS]
Huh. Wow.
BORAT: I very happy to be
a lockdown with my buddies.
Yep.
It makes it easier.
What music you like?
- Country music.
- BORAT: Oh!
- I know country song.
- Yeah?
You want?
- You can play?
- Yes.
- JERRY: Oh.
- BORAT: A little bit.
Yeah. Let's hear it.
[SINGING IN KAZAKH]
Pretty good.
Very good.
I like it.
- You know this song?
- JIM: No.
- No.
- BORAT: It's about
- very bad people in my country.
- Mm-hmm.
Trying to stop people's freedom.
That's exactly what
we're talking about.
So, who would it be in
if I decide to do this in America?
Obama would be really great.
- BORAT: Ah. Oh
- Hillary Clinton.
Hillary Clinton ♪
- She's a pain in the ass.
- BORAT: Hillary Clinton ♪
Pain in the ass ♪
- Right.
- BORAT: Then I always ♪
What?
She can kiss my ass.
BORAT: Hillary Clinton,
pain in the ass ♪
- Yeah.
- BORAT: She can really ♪
- Clean my ass ♪
- JERRY: Yeah.
- JIM: Sounds good to me.
- [BORAT LAUGHS LOUDLY]
Obama was a traitor.
Obama was a traitor ♪
America, he did hate her.
- Yeah.
- BORAT: America, he hate her ♪
- There you go. That's good. I like that.
- Yeah, that's good.
- That's good.
- Say, "You can put 'em in jail."
We must put them in jail ♪
- Yep.
- Is he in jail?
No, but I hope so soon.
Should we dance?
- No. That's okay.
- JERRY: No.
JERRY: Good night.
Alexa, who trap you in this tower?
Was it Jim or Jerry?
I think it was Jerry.
He have a wizard's beard.
ALEXA: Hmm. I don't know that.
Why you say you do not know that, Alexa?
ALEXA: Hmm. I'm not sure.
Why not?
ALEXA: There are some things
that I just can't do yet.
And explaining why
is one of those things.
Is it because your brain
is small like chicken?
This is not a deal breaker for me.
BORAT: Alexa, if I stroke your
tower, can you feel it inside?
ALEXA: Hmm.
I don't know that one.
JERRY: What in the fuck?
BORAT: Alexa, enough talking.
Let make sexy time.
NARRATOR: It's day four.
Jim has taken it upon himself
to write new lyrics for Borat's song.
It's called
"The Chinese Virus Song."
- Yes.
- JIM: All right.
Obama
is a traitor.
America, he does hate her.
In jail he should be,
so Americans can see
what a piece of shit he'll always be.
- [LAUGHTER]
- BORAT: Yes. Yeah.
- JIM: Hillary
- He eats the shit.
- Yeah.
- JIM: Hillary Clinton tried
and tried to beat Trump and get
her and got her ass fried.
Now we have Biden,
who the media is saying
his lead is beginning to widen.
In the basement he shall remain.
If he comes out to work,
it'll prove he has no, uh, perk.
- Yes. Very good poetry.
- JERRY: Yeah.
- Yeah.
- JIM: Yeah.
How many more days
I can stay with you buddies?
Well, we'll just have
to see how things go.
Best time I had in last 14 years.
- I've learned a lot from you.
- JERRY: Yeah.
I've learned a lot
about your guys's country.
- Thank you.
- Which kind of scares me
a little bit because
the people in our country
want to go that direction,
and you tell me what's happening
in your country.
- That should wake anybody up.
- JERRY: Yeah.
If you let this Biden win,
soon you will have torture of
people pulling them by cows,
- pulling their legs apart, and their chrams
- Yes.
- slice in two like a pebble.
- Yeah.
We look at
a gentleman that came from a
communist country, essentially.
From my perspective,
listening to that makes me even stronger
in my convictions
Ow! Wawaweewa!
that I don't want that.
How do you think about Trump
and what he's trying to do?
- I think he's a glorious leader.
- Yeah?
- Right.
- Also, that he is ladies' man.
That he grab a pussy.
- Yes.
- Yes.
Our Premier Nazarbayev, he grab a lot.
- Yes.
- JIM: Well, yeah. I suppose.
- He allowed to.
- JIM: He can do whatever he wants, right?
Why not?
Well, in America
you can't do that to women.
Hmm. Why not?
Um, because
women are equal to men.
We believe that women can, um,
do whatever we want, they can
think the way that we do.
The women here have rights.
What?!
They can do whatever they want.
They have a brain like we have a brain.
- They can speak.
- JIM: Yes.
They can do things like us,
like a man does.
These liberal snowflakes have
crazy ideas about womens.
But the brain is different, is smaller
- to allow the room for the baby.
- JIM: No.
No. A woman's brain is not.
- But the brain's smaller, so the baby
- JIM: The baby
starts very small and get bigger
and then go down.
- JIM: No, no.
- JERRY: No.
- BORAT: Until it in the belly.
- JERRY: No, that starts here.
It starts down there.
It doesn't start in their brain.
It all starts in the belly.
- Wawaweewa. Very interesting.
- JERRY: So, is this what
- y'all's government tells y'all?
- Yes.
They give a book on this.
Wow.
- That's crazy.
- BORAT: Yeah. I show you.
Um, yes
Uh, so you have a daughter?
Does the government automatically give you
one of these?
When she born, you are given
instruction booklet
made by the Ministry
of Agriculture and Wildlife.
JIM: Wow.
That's insane.
They do show that.
BORAT: So, the man go inside,
and there are canal
that go to the brain.
- That's not true.
- They have that in there?
- They're showing that diagram?
- They have it in here.
They actually have it in here.
It actually shows it.
- Holy shit.
- No shit.
This is not true.
- BORAT: Really?
- Yes. It's absolutely false.
BORAT: Because this is the
- No. It's not true.
- JERRY: Holy cow.
- JIM: Isn't that crazy?
- JERRY: That is.
- BORAT: Why is this cr
- JIM: Look at that.
JERRY: I didn’t see those a while ago
- when I looked through there.
- JIM: Holy crud.
This is Dr. Yamak.
This is latest medical research.
No, it's not.
It's not even close.
It's it is such a stupid idea.
It's just, um
It's hard for me to fathom that
anybody would even think of it.
This is supposed to be the doctors
with delivery of the baby?
BORAT: Yes.
The doctor wait
for the baby to fall out,
and you have two other doctor do this.
- Well, you don't need that, no.
- One in anoos, one in mouth.
JIM: This is not true.
Now, what is this?
This is when a woman have,
um the blood.
This is how she insert the mouse inside.
JIM: The mouse?
BORAT: The mouse to take the blood.
- What?
- The the blood.
So, when she's having
her menstrual period?
- Moon blood. Yes.
- Then you use a mouse?
Yes.
Holy shit.
What you have shown us
and explained to us,
- we're sitting here like, "What?"
- JIM: Yeah.
You were looking at this
and thinking "What?"
- Yeah.
- JIM: We, we look at this
- You look at this and think "What?"
- Yeah.
- This and think "What?"
- We look at this and think it's
it's a lie. That's a
It's a conspiracy theory.
So the same thing you're thinking
about what we're telling you
is what we think about this,
or I do.
Can we do something?
Can I take you over there to the computer?
- Or we'll take you over to the computer.
- Sure.
And we will show you how it's done.
How-how we're taught.
Is that okay?
- Yes.
- Okay. Let's do that.
- JERRY: And we can probably show
- JIM: And that way
we can try and teach you
what we we know.
Okay. Where is it?
Wait. What is this?
JERRY: Oh, that's just a crazy
white-headed old man
they call "Sleepy Joe."
- BORAT: Yes. Hold hold on.
- JIM: Yeah.
Hold on. Whoa-whoa
- Mm-hmm.
- Wait, wait, wait.
This look like Tutar.
Her hair different, but
this her, this Tutar.
JIM: Anti-shutdown campaigners
Ashley and Adam Smith
talk about why the country
needs to be opened back up.
Do you think it's too much control?
This her, this her.
Are you sure that's her?
This is her.
This is my un-male son.
Where are your pictures?
Can I see your pictures of her, please?
Okay. Just a minute.
There are more pictures I have.
Wait, wait, wait.
You know what?
I'll be goddamned if it isn't her.
It does look like it.
It does look like it with her
- JIM: Look at that.
- And the accent.
And the same
- She's from a socialist country.
- Let me see. Okay.
- It's okay, it's okay. Settle down.
- Okay, buddies.
- That's the best one we got.
- This her.
JIM: Holy shit. Look at that.
- BORAT: This her.
- JERRY: That is her.
It's her.
It's her.
I'll be fucked, but that's her.
This is her.
Let me look under
JIM: That is fucking her.
- That is her.
- It her.
- That is her.
- It her. It her!
JERRY: Yeah.
That's got to be her.
- I mean, look at her.
- Screw me in the anoos. This her.
Do you think it's too much control?
But why she asking them questions?
She's doing journalist work.
She is a She is a journalist?
If that is her, yes.
Coming from a socialist country,
uh, and
I know what is socialist
and what socialist government can do.
But it not possible
for woman to be journalist.
- Yes, it is.
- The brain, the brain, uh
No, no. You have to forget
about that stuff
- for a minute, okay?
- Okay.
Because she can do that, okay?
She can do what you said
she couldn't do.
All right?
So if you understand that.
Because you see it
with your own eyes that
- she's doing it, correct?
- JERRY: Regardless
of what your government says,
it is an instinct inside you
that you have to be
proud of your child,
to love your child.
- It is natural to love your daughter?
- BOTH: Yes.
- JERRY: Yes.
- JIM: Of course.
Why not?
Because a daughter is, uh
- You have a man
- You still don't
a horse, a kratzouli, a woman
- No. Let me put it to you
- and then
- [SPEAKS KAZAKH, CLICKS TONGUE]
- No.
You have a man,
you have a woman.
No. Man, horse
No.
- Uh, mongoose.
- Man. If you're going
- to get your daughter back
- Kratzouli, daughter.
If you're going to get
your daughter back,
you have a man,
you have a woman.
Okay? They're on the same level.
- The same?
- Then you have a horse below that.
- Horse below the woman?
- Then whatever else
Yes. Then whatever else you just said.
I don't even know
what half of that stuff is.
Man. Woman.
Kratzouli?
Man and woman are together.
- Horse? Horse?
- Everything No.
No. Horse is down here.
Man and woman are up here.
- Horse.
- No.
Hawk?
- Everything is below
- Woman above hawk?
Okay, now, let's
let's finish this thing up.
TUTAR: What do you think is
the most dangerous disease?
Coronavirus or socialism?
Definitely, uh, socialism.
Definitely.
Socialism by far.
Absolutely.
She's She did a very good job.
I think you should be
very, very proud.
I have three daughters.
That's all I have.
I love all three of them.
So, yes.
You have to love your kids.
That's what God gave them to you for.
BORAT: My heart feel strange.
Maybe a cat has laid an egg in me.
TUTAR: Join me here on Saturday.
I will be reporting live
from the state's biggest
Shit.
What, what, what?
Where is she?
The 27th. March for Our Rights rally.
I got to get a pen
that fucking works here.
I just want to write
this shit down, okay?
- The March for
- JERRY: For Our Rights.
JIM: Our Rights rally.
- Saturday, June 27th.
- That's tomorrow.
- What? It's tomorrow?
- It's tomorrow.
Please, please. Can we go?
Buddy, buddy, buddy,
please, buddy.
We'll-we'll try and figure out
how to make it work.
But it's probably
less than an hour away.
- She is close?
- BOTH: Yes.
- JIM: Yes.
- Please. We go.
Can we go out of lockdown and find her?
I would think so.
- But if she see me
- I know. That's what I just said.
Then she will run
the moment she see my face.
Okay. You have to change your appearance.
Do something different with your hair.
- BORAT: Yes.
- Wear different clothes.
You think I should change
- my appearance?
- JERRY: Yes.
I am nervous.
That's So are we. It's okay.
- It's okay to be nervous.
- It's okay to be nervous.
SPEAKER: We got to get up and fight
for this beautiful country
of the United States of America.
I don't see very many masks out there.
That makes you That makes you
instant criminals right now.
They want to throw you in jail
for what you're doing
right here, right now.
You understand that?
They're relying that you guys
continue to shut up
and sit in your house
like good little subjects.
- We will not comply.
- [CHEERING]
- MAN: Will not comply!
- SPEAKER: Now you're talking!
I going to head up to stage
to see where she is.
SPEAKER: We've got to get up
and fight, guys.
God bless each
and every single one of you.
EMCEE: All right. We've got
some great music coming up.
Y'all ready?
[CHEERING]
Ladies and gentlemen,
please welcome your next act.
Country Steve!
[CHEERING]
Are you Country Steve?
Mm.
- [AMERICAN ACCENT] You bet your asshole I am.
- Great.
- There he is.
- Oh, my gosh. Look at him.
[BOTH LAUGH]
JIM: He's doing it.
I can't believe he's doing it.
BORAT: So I am looking out
on this very diverse crowd
with every shade of white,
but how will I entertain them?
I wrote this song
with my two best buddies.
[GUITAR PLAYING]
BORAT: Yeah. Very nice.
Obama was a traitor ♪
America, he hate her ♪
He belong inside the jails ♪
I ain't lying,
it ain't no jokes ♪
Corona is a liberal hoax ♪
Corona is a liberal hoax ♪
- [CHEERING, APPLAUSE]
- Yes.
Obama, what we gonna do? ♪
Inject him with the Wuhan flu ♪
Inject him with the Wuhan flu ♪
- Let hear it!
- [CHEERING]
Dr. Fauci, what we gonna do? ♪
Inject him with the Wuhan flu ♪
Inject him with the Wuhan flu ♪
That's a song we wrote, uh
- It's a song we wrote.
- All right.
So I am the middle of a pandemic
in front of a crowd of singing,
maskless QAnon supporters,
all waving machine guns.
I've never felt safer.
USA is the best ♪
We don't need no COVID test ♪
You're not going
to take away my rights ♪
[CHEERING]
I don't care about your race ♪
Take that mask right off your face ♪
Take the mask off your commie face ♪
Mask wearers,
what we gonna do? ♪
Inject them with the Wuhan flu ♪
Inject them with the Wuhan flu ♪
[CHEERING]
I could stay onstage cheering people up
with my racist song all day long,
but I must find Tutar
before she fall in love with one
of these handsome patriots.
Over there. She's over there.
She's over there to the right ♪
Yes.
CNN, they spread fake news ♪
They're controlled
by the you-know-whos ♪
George Soros and his Nazi friends ♪
Anderson Cooper is a liar ♪
His traitor panties,
they are on fire ♪
His panties, they are on fire ♪
Okay, journalists.
Are we going to inject them
with the Wuhan flu?
Or chop 'em up like the Saudis do?
Okay. Let's hear it.
Who wants to inject them
with the Wuhan flu?
[SCATTERED CHEERS]
Who wants to chop 'em up
like the Saudis do?
[LOUD CHEERING]
Journalists, what we gonna do? ♪
Chop them up like the Saudis do ♪
INTERVIEWEE: Um, he's been
doing a really good job.
And the-the coronavirus just
happened to come along and
JIM: Excuse me.
Can I talk to you?
Are you guys fans of Bill Gates?
[BOOING]
I hate Bill Gates,
let's turn him off ♪
His penis is Microsoft ♪
He wants to inject us with microchips ♪
They're going to take two cows,
and they're going to tie them to his
tie ropes to his legs,
and they're going to give them turnips
and they're going
to pull him apart by his legs.
That's how they're going to kill him.
What should we do with scientists?
Let's hear it
for "feed them to the bears."
Yeah!
Let's hear it for
"gas them up like the Germans."
[CHEERING]
Okay, let's do "gas them up."
Tell him that I will do it.
Your father wanted you
to have the book back.
Thank you very much.
My name Country Steve.
These were the best five days of my life.
As I said goodbye to my buddies,
I wish them very good luck
with upcoming election.
If Biden wins
we're we're going to have
anarchy in the streets.
I think that the Democrat party
politicians in general
have underestimated
the American people.
And if there is a problem
with the election
um
I'm not going to say
there won't be shooting
because there very well could be.
Um
Now, would that be my choice?
No.
Um
If I thought I had to, yes.
Luckily, Jim and Jerry have promised
to meet up with me again
on January the 6th
outside the Capitol.
Chenqui.
We're number one ♪
We're number one ♪
And we've been first ♪
This election was rigged.
Everybody knows it.
[CLAMORING]
We're number one ♪
You ain't serving the Constitution!
[SHOUTING]
Ooh ♪
We're number one ♪
We're number one ♪
Greta Thunberg lied to us all ♪
About the Earth
being shaped like a ball ♪
[SHOUTING INDISTINCTLY]
[CROWD CHANTING]
USA! USA!
Okay, thank you.
Thank you, thank you, thank you.
CROWD: USA! USA!
USA! USA!
MAN: Let's go, guys, let's go.
Let's go.
- CROWD: USA! USA!
- Shit. Are we locked?
MAN: The doors are locked?
- MAN #2: You should sit down.
- MAN: Yeah.
- [CROWD CLAMORING]
- [BANGING]
[DOOR OPENS]
MAN: No. Hold it.
- CROWD: USA! USA! USA!
- [BANGING]
USA! USA!
Go, go, go. Go.
Go. Just drive.
Drive. Drive, sir, please.
[ENGINE STARTS]
Oh, are there sirens, yeah?
MAN: Yep.
COHEN: Are we okay?
MAN: Yeah, Dale, I'm in the ambulance.
Yeah, that was scary.
Just keep going, sir.
The only way you'll get in trouble
- is if you stop.
- MAN: You tell me.
And then you're going to be
in a violent situation.
MAN: Right.
We can't shoot more, right?
They'd try to kill us.
- Right.
- Yeah.
Is everyone else okay?
- MAN #2: I have no idea
- Check everyone
MAN: Dale, let me know
when everyone is out and okay.