Do Not Disturb (2016) s01e01 Episode Script
Work Sex
"My superior lifted me onto the room service cart "and kissed me deep.
"The most thrilling part was knowing a coworker could discover us.
" Larry, what is this nasty filthiness you're reading and are there pictures? Somebody who used to work here wrote an anonymous article for Time Out.
Apparently they had a crazy fling with their superior who still works here.
Yeah, we're trying to figure out who it is.
Now the only clue we have is that he or she is known to be "sexually voracious.
" So far, we got Neal in the lead with 11 votes.
We've got Nicole with one vote I voted for her.
I told you, I don't do voracious.
It's like, I'm already drunk and naked; what more do you want? Okay, look, that's enough of this.
And y'all have work to do, and I only got two? Yeah, which is five more than I got.
That's right.
Three people actually took the time to say, "I don't know who it is, but it's definitely not Larry.
" Thank you.
Thank you, all.
You know what? I voted for you, Rhonda.
I felt like you should have another vote up there.
Thank you, Billy.
You're always looking out for me.
But I'm too busy taking care of all of y'all to worry about this foolishness.
Besides, we all know it's Neal who's throwing people on room service carts.
And apparently that table.
±¾×ÖÄ»½ö¹©Ñ§Ï°½»Á÷£¬ÑϽûÓÃÓÚÉÌÒµÓÃ; DO NOT DISTURB 101 -=ÆÆÀÃÐÜ×ÖÄ»×é=- ·Òë: УÔ: ʱ¼äÖá:ÎÒ°®Ê¨ÐÄСs Yo, Neal, the new girl Tasha is killing me.
Think it's time I make my move.
Too late, squirt.
The move is being made.
I ought to hit you in the snout with this.
And what are you doing, Gus? Just letting Neal have my scraps.
Have you seen this? Before you say anything, the article was anonymous.
It could have been about anyone.
Neal, just because this hotel is filled with pretty girls in hoochie skirts, that's no excuse for you, their boss, to take advantage of that.
Come on, Rhonda.
Are you telling me that if one of these strapping young bellmen threw themselves at you, you wouldn't po-po-po-pow? First of all, if you're doing it like that, you're doing it wrong.
And second of all, as much as I'd love to, no.
I can't talk to you.
You don't get me.
Neal, I need to know that you're hearing me.
Otherwise, I'm going to have to find another way to make myself clear.
I wonder what's she's going to make me for breakfast tomorrow.
Why are we having a sex at work seminar? Because when our dirty laundry makes it into a magazine, it's the HR director's job to make sure you department heads are toeing the line.
Then why am I here? I'm not a department head.
You're the front desk supervisor.
Ew, when did that happen? Oh, three months ago.
You know, back when Sara was fired after she walked up the stairs and we all saw her penis.
This is my side job, not my career.
When am I supposed to model when you have me basically running the hotel? Honey, you're not running anything.
You fill out one shift report a night.
Not everybody does that report? How have I climbed so far up this ladder? I DON'T WANNA HAVE THIS meeting either, but some people have been using the hotel as their own personal dating service.
We all know you're talking about Neal.
Why isn't he here? Because he thought it would be a waste of time.
That's not fair.
Sorry I'm late.
I thought I was trying out a new masseuse in here.
Billy, get the door.
This better be another intervention for Nicole.
Again? Okay, uh, while SEXUAL HARASSMEN I realize that not every workplace romance SEXUAL HARASSMEN ends in murder-suicide I think it's clear that once the ball gets rolling, it's difficult to stop.
I don't know about you guys, but I am scared straight.
Oh, thank you, Rhonda, for that informative and time-consuming meeting.
See, that's what makes me think I'm not getting through to you.
Why is this all about me? When I speak to women at this hotel, I'm respectful and decent.
- Really?! - What?! "Hey, sweetheart, do you need some help carrying those blouse bags?" That's just you and me, girl.
That's how we play.
I have seen the smarmy, "I'm Neal Danner" intro that he always does.
And flipping his business cards? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
"I'm Neal Danner, general manager of the Inn.
This is my private number.
" I don't know what's so funny.
It's worked on at least two people in this room.
Which is the problem, okay? We all need to exercise a little more self-control.
Do you understand me Neal? Again, we're not sure this is about me.
Fine, fine, fine, fine! I get it.
You all think I'm some lecherous horndog boss, running around with my fly open.
Well, I'm going to prove to each and every one of you that I'm in complete control of my sexual urges.
Your fly's actually open.
I THOUGHT I WAS GETTING A MASSAGE.
You really are the hardest-working man in this building, aren't you? When you love what you do, it doesn't really feel like work.
When you're actually watching a video of an Asian toddler sing "Hit Me Baby One More Time.
" Wow, you are trouble.
Cute and funny.
Yeah, I guess we haven't officially met.
I'm Neal Danner, general manager of the Inn.
This is my private What happened? Were my hands wet? It's just water.
No, no, they're perfect.
They're perfect.
Like everything else on you.
Oh, good.
Hey, listen, I was about to take a break and I was wondering if you wanted to come with and get to know each other a little better.
Wow, what a bad day for this to happen.
Um, I appreciate the offer a lot, but I can't.
So you have a nice day Tasha, my employee.
Welcome aboard.
I salute you.
Oh, I cannot believe this day.
One minute I'm a model, and the next I'm president of the Inn.
Well, if you want to get back into modeling, I can call my agency and see if they'd meet with you.
Thanks, but how am I going to book a perfume ad through your temp agency? No, my modeling agency.
Your what? I'm a model.
I model.
I don't think you're using that word right.
Okay, Larry, I feel like I'm in need right now, and you're not doing anything.
Don't bring that over here.
I will find out who makes their "4s" like this.
Has it occurred to you that no one voted for you because you're in a relationship with Victor? Oh, so it's Victor's fault.
I can get behind that.
Well, ever since you've been with him, you don't put out a sexual vibe anymore.
What? That's crazy.
I totally still put out a vibe.
Hey, brown eyes, you just starting your shift? 'Cause seeing you in that uniform is starting a little shift over here.
Wow, you kiss your boyfriend with that mouth? All right, I'm sorry.
I'm trying to prove to Nicole that my relationship hasn't killed my sexuality.
Well, swing and a miss, dude.
All right, so that's it then.
Five years with Victor has turned me from a man about town to a Bravo-watching houseplant.
See, that's your problem.
If you don't see yourself as sexual, why should we? You know, you need to get out there.
You know, check someone out.
Do a little harmless flirting.
Feel that rush of attention.
That's what I was just doing.
Might want to aim it at someone on the pink team.
Hey, brown eyes, need help carrying those blouse bags? What did I just say? His name is Billy and he works out all the time.
Hey, Rhonda, can I talk to you for one second? Come on in.
Um, I was thinking about the meeting, and I just wanted to make you aware of a situation.
What is it? What did Neal do? No, no, no, Neal Neal didn't do anything.
It's just, uh I did, you know.
Or at least, I want to and I just I don't know.
It's just crazy.
Billy, I expect more from you.
You're my guy.
Those messy little girls out there aren't worth your time.
No, no, see, she's no girl.
She's a woman.
And she's no mess.
Oh really? go on.
She's smart.
She's put together.
She spends all of her time taking care of other people, which just makes me want to be the guy that gets to take care of her.
Sounds like the right way to get a woman like that.
Because what would she do if I kissed her soft lips? If I woke up next to her, made her breakfast, took her to a matinee? - Movie or Broadway? - Movie.
I don't think she would mind that at all.
Whoa.
I-I-I'm sorry.
That was that was that was wrong.
That was wrong.
Yep, wrong.
Wrong-- that was so wrong.
And after everything I said to Neal.
I know, I know, I know.
But, Rhonda, what am I supposed to do, okay? I mean maybe I should just quit, you know.
You know, I should just leave right now.
Wait, no, no, no, no.
No, no, no, wait, wait, wait wait, wait.
You know, you can't quit.
This is this is your rent, and this is your insurance.
And that's lot to give up for a quote, unquote, perfect behind.
Did I say that? It was coming.
Listen, I can't ask you to sacrifice all that just for me.
And besides, I can't be with a man who don't have a job.
Okay, so what are you saying? I guess what I'm saying is if your hypothetical woman was allegedly interested in sneaking around with your theoretical man, would he be, uh able to keep his gorgeous mouth shut? I think he could.
- Yeah? - Yeah.
Then shut up.
Molly, is Rhonda in? I think so.
Hey, Rhonda, why is your door locked? Hang on.
I'm finishing up a meeting.
- Hey.
- So guess what I just didn't do? - Hey.
- Hey.
Uh uh Billy was just bringing a security issue to my attention.
Something I should know about? No, no, no, no.
Um, why don't you come back later and finish up that presentation? Okay.
I'll bring the ice.
Huh? What? I don't even know what he talking about.
Get out of here.
So, uh, check this out.
Tasha, the crazy hot girl upstairs just threw herself at me.
What? And I walked away.
I know you like to think you're the bastion of self-control around here, but it now looks like that's a party of two.
No, no, no, no, I never claimed to be the bastion of anything.
I mean, just because a person does one good thing, that don't make 'em a good person.
Just like if a person does a bad thing, that don't make her a bad person.
What are you talking about? And who's she? She You leave her out of this! She is a good Christian woman, but you, you made one good decision.
So what? You want to impress me? Keep it going.
No problem.
Hey, Rhonda, I know that we said we would meet later, but I don't think that issue can wait; the security issue.
Guys, I'm the general manager.
If there's a security issue, I think I should know about it.
No, no, no, no.
No, no, no, no, I got this.
You got a lot to do.
You go on, take care of what you gotta do, your thing.
I'm gonna take care of this.
Molly, how often are they in there with the door locked? If you're implying what I think you're implying, that's, like, super-racist.
Oh, my God, Molly, you're a model.
I know.
For the second-largest plus-sized-clothing chain in Indiana.
That's amazing.
I'm assuming.
Now you have to call your agent for me.
Why should I? You weren't exactly nice to me before when I offered.
That's only because I didn't believe you.
Now please dial.
Sorry, Nicole, everything doesn't always go your way.
Yes, yes, it does! I need this, and you are gonna get it for me.
You are gonna get back on that phone and make them send me somewhere where someone will take my picture for money because as long as I'm a model, I can still be the pretty girl who hasn't figured out what she wants to do yet, but if I'm not, I'm just some chick who works in a hotel and I'm not ready to face that! Got it?! It's scary in there, huh? You have no idea.
Oh, hold the elevator.
Okay! Close, close, close, close, close, close, close! Your button beat my button.
I can tell that you've been avoiding me lately.
I just wanted to apologize for coming on so strong yesterday.
I just thought you were the kind of guy who liked to have a little fun.
I do.
I do.
Fun is fun.
Fun's American.
It's just that I'm your boss, so And that is what makes it so hot.
Oh, I'm sorry.
I did it again.
That is bad.
I'm bad.
It's cool.
Bad's, bad's cool.
Bad's American.
Look, I'm just going through a sort of life thing right now where I can't do things that I normally would have done already.
So if you weren't going through this life thing, you would have done it? Oh, God, yes.
I bet it would have been nice.
No, it would have been nasty.
Very, very nasty.
And where would we have done it? I knew we'd end up down here.
Yeah? Yeah.
I'm just surprised it took so long the way everybody talked about you.
Yeah! Wait, wait, wait.
- Oh, no.
- What? - No.
- Did you already? No! No, I just can't control myself.
I really am like an animal sneaking around a basement, looking for some quick hookup at work.
Hey.
Did you forget that I was behind you? What's he doing in there? Work.
We were working.
Security.
What are you and, uh, uh, Tasha doing, huh? Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
What kind of security issues are going on in the electric room? Thieving.
Somebody who works at this hotel is thieving all sorts of things: uh, silverware, toilet tissue, electrical - fuses.
- fuses.
But you know, that's not the issue right now.
What are you doing sneaking down the hallways with her? Oh, hey, hey, we, we did not do anything.
I stopped us.
You know, why am I even trying to prove myself to you? Yeah, why are you, huh? When you should be doing the same thing we were doing: working.
Why don't we all just get back to work? Okay, so we almost got caught.
That made it twice as hot.
This is this is weird.
I haven't tried to flirt in years.
This place should be easy.
Everybody in here looks gay.
I'm not gay.
I said, "Looks gay.
" All right, so what's your type? God, I don't really have a type.
I'm not really hung up on superficial Hello, shoulders.
All right, that's our guy.
Now flirt.
I don't know, Gus.
I'm thinking about Victor.
It just feels wrong.
You're just sharing a moment of attraction with someone so you can feel good about yourself again.
Okay, he just looked at me.
Of course he did.
Now give it back.
Okay, well, that worked.
You're right.
That was a rush.
It's, like, "You're hot.
I'm hot.
See ya later.
" I can't believe I was afraid of that.
It's just a harmless, feel good Excuse me.
Were you just flirting with me? Hells yes, he was.
Larry, I'm Cody.
Victor's friend from yoga.
Morning, sunshine.
What are you doing in my office? I've been thinking a lot about running into you and Billy downstairs.
What? Huh? You still on that? That is so yesterday.
You guys are dealing with a major crime issue that I've been ignoring.
I mean, you and Billy have really been banging away at this thing.
Just bending over backwards to catch this thief.
And what have I been doing? Nothing.
Don't beat yourself up.
It's Nothing until yesterday when I had security cameras installed all over the hotel.
You had what? Tiny security cameras installed everywhere, and I mean everywhere.
If there's something going on that we don't know about we're gonna find out now.
So why don't you grab some chair and we can watch these tapes together Movie night! All right, what should we start with? How about the electrical room? Definitely not.
Okay, what about the laundry room? Okay.
No, no, no, no.
You know what? Let's just go ahead and start with the security entrance.
What? Um, no.
We cannot watch that tape.
The heads on this VCR have never been cleaned, and I heard that, um, the grit can scratch the tape and make it look like there's two black people stuck together.
That's a myth.
Give it to me.
That was my copy of Glitter.
What? There are no security cameras, Rhonda.
You've been messing around with Billy.
Yes! Yes, I have! And and it was good.
You know what? No.
No, no! Let me tell you something.
It wasn't my fault, though, because that boy came after me.
I didn't even do nothing.
And then he and I We You know what? No, I'm not gonna make an excuse.
I am the same lowdown dirty dog you are, so go ahead, take your best shot.
Because you know what? I deserve it.
I have never felt closer to you.
What? You gave in.
You lost control.
You snuck around and lied about it.
You get me now, and I get you.
This is what you feel like? All the time.
Your coffee's on me today.
Thanks to you, I am officially a model again.
That's so great! Nice.
What's the gig? Ready? You are looking at the new face of crystal meth addiction! I'm so happy for you.
I know.
We're talking billboards, hospital pamphlets, and just wait till you see the photo.
Black background, tousled hair, hollow eyes, tag line: "Don't let this happen to you.
" Hey, how'd it go at home last night? Did that guy tell Victor you hit on him? Yeah, he did.
Is Victor pissed? He was furious at first, then jealous, then insecure.
Then things got kind of amazing.
I went from trying to nail the new girl to getting two guys laid.
My day really took a turn.
By the way, I finished reading that article.
It really wasn't about me.
I haven't done half that stuff.
If that's not you, who is it? Sorry I grabbed your keys this morning.
Thanks for bringing them by.
Yeah, you know, Moll, I gotta say, I don't miss working here.
But I do miss my supervisor.
Your article could have gotten me in so much trouble, you know? You think they're onto us? Not like I'm gonna be onto you later tonight.
Okay, bye.
See you at 6:00.
ÆÆÀÃÐÜ×ÖÄ»×é »Ó¼ÓÈë
"The most thrilling part was knowing a coworker could discover us.
" Larry, what is this nasty filthiness you're reading and are there pictures? Somebody who used to work here wrote an anonymous article for Time Out.
Apparently they had a crazy fling with their superior who still works here.
Yeah, we're trying to figure out who it is.
Now the only clue we have is that he or she is known to be "sexually voracious.
" So far, we got Neal in the lead with 11 votes.
We've got Nicole with one vote I voted for her.
I told you, I don't do voracious.
It's like, I'm already drunk and naked; what more do you want? Okay, look, that's enough of this.
And y'all have work to do, and I only got two? Yeah, which is five more than I got.
That's right.
Three people actually took the time to say, "I don't know who it is, but it's definitely not Larry.
" Thank you.
Thank you, all.
You know what? I voted for you, Rhonda.
I felt like you should have another vote up there.
Thank you, Billy.
You're always looking out for me.
But I'm too busy taking care of all of y'all to worry about this foolishness.
Besides, we all know it's Neal who's throwing people on room service carts.
And apparently that table.
±¾×ÖÄ»½ö¹©Ñ§Ï°½»Á÷£¬ÑϽûÓÃÓÚÉÌÒµÓÃ; DO NOT DISTURB 101 -=ÆÆÀÃÐÜ×ÖÄ»×é=- ·Òë: УÔ: ʱ¼äÖá:ÎÒ°®Ê¨ÐÄСs Yo, Neal, the new girl Tasha is killing me.
Think it's time I make my move.
Too late, squirt.
The move is being made.
I ought to hit you in the snout with this.
And what are you doing, Gus? Just letting Neal have my scraps.
Have you seen this? Before you say anything, the article was anonymous.
It could have been about anyone.
Neal, just because this hotel is filled with pretty girls in hoochie skirts, that's no excuse for you, their boss, to take advantage of that.
Come on, Rhonda.
Are you telling me that if one of these strapping young bellmen threw themselves at you, you wouldn't po-po-po-pow? First of all, if you're doing it like that, you're doing it wrong.
And second of all, as much as I'd love to, no.
I can't talk to you.
You don't get me.
Neal, I need to know that you're hearing me.
Otherwise, I'm going to have to find another way to make myself clear.
I wonder what's she's going to make me for breakfast tomorrow.
Why are we having a sex at work seminar? Because when our dirty laundry makes it into a magazine, it's the HR director's job to make sure you department heads are toeing the line.
Then why am I here? I'm not a department head.
You're the front desk supervisor.
Ew, when did that happen? Oh, three months ago.
You know, back when Sara was fired after she walked up the stairs and we all saw her penis.
This is my side job, not my career.
When am I supposed to model when you have me basically running the hotel? Honey, you're not running anything.
You fill out one shift report a night.
Not everybody does that report? How have I climbed so far up this ladder? I DON'T WANNA HAVE THIS meeting either, but some people have been using the hotel as their own personal dating service.
We all know you're talking about Neal.
Why isn't he here? Because he thought it would be a waste of time.
That's not fair.
Sorry I'm late.
I thought I was trying out a new masseuse in here.
Billy, get the door.
This better be another intervention for Nicole.
Again? Okay, uh, while SEXUAL HARASSMEN I realize that not every workplace romance SEXUAL HARASSMEN ends in murder-suicide I think it's clear that once the ball gets rolling, it's difficult to stop.
I don't know about you guys, but I am scared straight.
Oh, thank you, Rhonda, for that informative and time-consuming meeting.
See, that's what makes me think I'm not getting through to you.
Why is this all about me? When I speak to women at this hotel, I'm respectful and decent.
- Really?! - What?! "Hey, sweetheart, do you need some help carrying those blouse bags?" That's just you and me, girl.
That's how we play.
I have seen the smarmy, "I'm Neal Danner" intro that he always does.
And flipping his business cards? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
"I'm Neal Danner, general manager of the Inn.
This is my private number.
" I don't know what's so funny.
It's worked on at least two people in this room.
Which is the problem, okay? We all need to exercise a little more self-control.
Do you understand me Neal? Again, we're not sure this is about me.
Fine, fine, fine, fine! I get it.
You all think I'm some lecherous horndog boss, running around with my fly open.
Well, I'm going to prove to each and every one of you that I'm in complete control of my sexual urges.
Your fly's actually open.
I THOUGHT I WAS GETTING A MASSAGE.
You really are the hardest-working man in this building, aren't you? When you love what you do, it doesn't really feel like work.
When you're actually watching a video of an Asian toddler sing "Hit Me Baby One More Time.
" Wow, you are trouble.
Cute and funny.
Yeah, I guess we haven't officially met.
I'm Neal Danner, general manager of the Inn.
This is my private What happened? Were my hands wet? It's just water.
No, no, they're perfect.
They're perfect.
Like everything else on you.
Oh, good.
Hey, listen, I was about to take a break and I was wondering if you wanted to come with and get to know each other a little better.
Wow, what a bad day for this to happen.
Um, I appreciate the offer a lot, but I can't.
So you have a nice day Tasha, my employee.
Welcome aboard.
I salute you.
Oh, I cannot believe this day.
One minute I'm a model, and the next I'm president of the Inn.
Well, if you want to get back into modeling, I can call my agency and see if they'd meet with you.
Thanks, but how am I going to book a perfume ad through your temp agency? No, my modeling agency.
Your what? I'm a model.
I model.
I don't think you're using that word right.
Okay, Larry, I feel like I'm in need right now, and you're not doing anything.
Don't bring that over here.
I will find out who makes their "4s" like this.
Has it occurred to you that no one voted for you because you're in a relationship with Victor? Oh, so it's Victor's fault.
I can get behind that.
Well, ever since you've been with him, you don't put out a sexual vibe anymore.
What? That's crazy.
I totally still put out a vibe.
Hey, brown eyes, you just starting your shift? 'Cause seeing you in that uniform is starting a little shift over here.
Wow, you kiss your boyfriend with that mouth? All right, I'm sorry.
I'm trying to prove to Nicole that my relationship hasn't killed my sexuality.
Well, swing and a miss, dude.
All right, so that's it then.
Five years with Victor has turned me from a man about town to a Bravo-watching houseplant.
See, that's your problem.
If you don't see yourself as sexual, why should we? You know, you need to get out there.
You know, check someone out.
Do a little harmless flirting.
Feel that rush of attention.
That's what I was just doing.
Might want to aim it at someone on the pink team.
Hey, brown eyes, need help carrying those blouse bags? What did I just say? His name is Billy and he works out all the time.
Hey, Rhonda, can I talk to you for one second? Come on in.
Um, I was thinking about the meeting, and I just wanted to make you aware of a situation.
What is it? What did Neal do? No, no, no, Neal Neal didn't do anything.
It's just, uh I did, you know.
Or at least, I want to and I just I don't know.
It's just crazy.
Billy, I expect more from you.
You're my guy.
Those messy little girls out there aren't worth your time.
No, no, see, she's no girl.
She's a woman.
And she's no mess.
Oh really? go on.
She's smart.
She's put together.
She spends all of her time taking care of other people, which just makes me want to be the guy that gets to take care of her.
Sounds like the right way to get a woman like that.
Because what would she do if I kissed her soft lips? If I woke up next to her, made her breakfast, took her to a matinee? - Movie or Broadway? - Movie.
I don't think she would mind that at all.
Whoa.
I-I-I'm sorry.
That was that was that was wrong.
That was wrong.
Yep, wrong.
Wrong-- that was so wrong.
And after everything I said to Neal.
I know, I know, I know.
But, Rhonda, what am I supposed to do, okay? I mean maybe I should just quit, you know.
You know, I should just leave right now.
Wait, no, no, no, no.
No, no, no, wait, wait, wait wait, wait.
You know, you can't quit.
This is this is your rent, and this is your insurance.
And that's lot to give up for a quote, unquote, perfect behind.
Did I say that? It was coming.
Listen, I can't ask you to sacrifice all that just for me.
And besides, I can't be with a man who don't have a job.
Okay, so what are you saying? I guess what I'm saying is if your hypothetical woman was allegedly interested in sneaking around with your theoretical man, would he be, uh able to keep his gorgeous mouth shut? I think he could.
- Yeah? - Yeah.
Then shut up.
Molly, is Rhonda in? I think so.
Hey, Rhonda, why is your door locked? Hang on.
I'm finishing up a meeting.
- Hey.
- So guess what I just didn't do? - Hey.
- Hey.
Uh uh Billy was just bringing a security issue to my attention.
Something I should know about? No, no, no, no.
Um, why don't you come back later and finish up that presentation? Okay.
I'll bring the ice.
Huh? What? I don't even know what he talking about.
Get out of here.
So, uh, check this out.
Tasha, the crazy hot girl upstairs just threw herself at me.
What? And I walked away.
I know you like to think you're the bastion of self-control around here, but it now looks like that's a party of two.
No, no, no, no, I never claimed to be the bastion of anything.
I mean, just because a person does one good thing, that don't make 'em a good person.
Just like if a person does a bad thing, that don't make her a bad person.
What are you talking about? And who's she? She You leave her out of this! She is a good Christian woman, but you, you made one good decision.
So what? You want to impress me? Keep it going.
No problem.
Hey, Rhonda, I know that we said we would meet later, but I don't think that issue can wait; the security issue.
Guys, I'm the general manager.
If there's a security issue, I think I should know about it.
No, no, no, no.
No, no, no, no, I got this.
You got a lot to do.
You go on, take care of what you gotta do, your thing.
I'm gonna take care of this.
Molly, how often are they in there with the door locked? If you're implying what I think you're implying, that's, like, super-racist.
Oh, my God, Molly, you're a model.
I know.
For the second-largest plus-sized-clothing chain in Indiana.
That's amazing.
I'm assuming.
Now you have to call your agent for me.
Why should I? You weren't exactly nice to me before when I offered.
That's only because I didn't believe you.
Now please dial.
Sorry, Nicole, everything doesn't always go your way.
Yes, yes, it does! I need this, and you are gonna get it for me.
You are gonna get back on that phone and make them send me somewhere where someone will take my picture for money because as long as I'm a model, I can still be the pretty girl who hasn't figured out what she wants to do yet, but if I'm not, I'm just some chick who works in a hotel and I'm not ready to face that! Got it?! It's scary in there, huh? You have no idea.
Oh, hold the elevator.
Okay! Close, close, close, close, close, close, close! Your button beat my button.
I can tell that you've been avoiding me lately.
I just wanted to apologize for coming on so strong yesterday.
I just thought you were the kind of guy who liked to have a little fun.
I do.
I do.
Fun is fun.
Fun's American.
It's just that I'm your boss, so And that is what makes it so hot.
Oh, I'm sorry.
I did it again.
That is bad.
I'm bad.
It's cool.
Bad's, bad's cool.
Bad's American.
Look, I'm just going through a sort of life thing right now where I can't do things that I normally would have done already.
So if you weren't going through this life thing, you would have done it? Oh, God, yes.
I bet it would have been nice.
No, it would have been nasty.
Very, very nasty.
And where would we have done it? I knew we'd end up down here.
Yeah? Yeah.
I'm just surprised it took so long the way everybody talked about you.
Yeah! Wait, wait, wait.
- Oh, no.
- What? - No.
- Did you already? No! No, I just can't control myself.
I really am like an animal sneaking around a basement, looking for some quick hookup at work.
Hey.
Did you forget that I was behind you? What's he doing in there? Work.
We were working.
Security.
What are you and, uh, uh, Tasha doing, huh? Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
What kind of security issues are going on in the electric room? Thieving.
Somebody who works at this hotel is thieving all sorts of things: uh, silverware, toilet tissue, electrical - fuses.
- fuses.
But you know, that's not the issue right now.
What are you doing sneaking down the hallways with her? Oh, hey, hey, we, we did not do anything.
I stopped us.
You know, why am I even trying to prove myself to you? Yeah, why are you, huh? When you should be doing the same thing we were doing: working.
Why don't we all just get back to work? Okay, so we almost got caught.
That made it twice as hot.
This is this is weird.
I haven't tried to flirt in years.
This place should be easy.
Everybody in here looks gay.
I'm not gay.
I said, "Looks gay.
" All right, so what's your type? God, I don't really have a type.
I'm not really hung up on superficial Hello, shoulders.
All right, that's our guy.
Now flirt.
I don't know, Gus.
I'm thinking about Victor.
It just feels wrong.
You're just sharing a moment of attraction with someone so you can feel good about yourself again.
Okay, he just looked at me.
Of course he did.
Now give it back.
Okay, well, that worked.
You're right.
That was a rush.
It's, like, "You're hot.
I'm hot.
See ya later.
" I can't believe I was afraid of that.
It's just a harmless, feel good Excuse me.
Were you just flirting with me? Hells yes, he was.
Larry, I'm Cody.
Victor's friend from yoga.
Morning, sunshine.
What are you doing in my office? I've been thinking a lot about running into you and Billy downstairs.
What? Huh? You still on that? That is so yesterday.
You guys are dealing with a major crime issue that I've been ignoring.
I mean, you and Billy have really been banging away at this thing.
Just bending over backwards to catch this thief.
And what have I been doing? Nothing.
Don't beat yourself up.
It's Nothing until yesterday when I had security cameras installed all over the hotel.
You had what? Tiny security cameras installed everywhere, and I mean everywhere.
If there's something going on that we don't know about we're gonna find out now.
So why don't you grab some chair and we can watch these tapes together Movie night! All right, what should we start with? How about the electrical room? Definitely not.
Okay, what about the laundry room? Okay.
No, no, no, no.
You know what? Let's just go ahead and start with the security entrance.
What? Um, no.
We cannot watch that tape.
The heads on this VCR have never been cleaned, and I heard that, um, the grit can scratch the tape and make it look like there's two black people stuck together.
That's a myth.
Give it to me.
That was my copy of Glitter.
What? There are no security cameras, Rhonda.
You've been messing around with Billy.
Yes! Yes, I have! And and it was good.
You know what? No.
No, no! Let me tell you something.
It wasn't my fault, though, because that boy came after me.
I didn't even do nothing.
And then he and I We You know what? No, I'm not gonna make an excuse.
I am the same lowdown dirty dog you are, so go ahead, take your best shot.
Because you know what? I deserve it.
I have never felt closer to you.
What? You gave in.
You lost control.
You snuck around and lied about it.
You get me now, and I get you.
This is what you feel like? All the time.
Your coffee's on me today.
Thanks to you, I am officially a model again.
That's so great! Nice.
What's the gig? Ready? You are looking at the new face of crystal meth addiction! I'm so happy for you.
I know.
We're talking billboards, hospital pamphlets, and just wait till you see the photo.
Black background, tousled hair, hollow eyes, tag line: "Don't let this happen to you.
" Hey, how'd it go at home last night? Did that guy tell Victor you hit on him? Yeah, he did.
Is Victor pissed? He was furious at first, then jealous, then insecure.
Then things got kind of amazing.
I went from trying to nail the new girl to getting two guys laid.
My day really took a turn.
By the way, I finished reading that article.
It really wasn't about me.
I haven't done half that stuff.
If that's not you, who is it? Sorry I grabbed your keys this morning.
Thanks for bringing them by.
Yeah, you know, Moll, I gotta say, I don't miss working here.
But I do miss my supervisor.
Your article could have gotten me in so much trouble, you know? You think they're onto us? Not like I'm gonna be onto you later tonight.
Okay, bye.
See you at 6:00.
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