Doll and Em (2013) s01e01 Episode Script

I just I just sort of had enough, actually.
It got to a point where he wasn't only really depressed and just keeping to himself being really depressed, but he was following me 'round the house criticizing everything I was doing.
Like, I was either I was putting too much toothpaste on my toothbrush, I wasn't turning the tap off between brushing my teeth and spitting the water out.
Every time I was cooking, he was smelling the food, and when I was making salad and things, he was going through every single individual leaf.
- It was - Oh, my God.
Doll, this isn't right.
It's not right that you should be feeling this way about yourself.
You're an amazing girl.
You're a lovely, bright, funny, clever, kind, wonderful person, and he knows that, really, you know.
He knows that and he's threatened by it.
And he's jealous of it.
Oh, sweetheart.
Oh, my God.
- Hey.
- Hi, Emily.
Sorry, we need you in hair and makeup right away.
- Right now? Are you sure? - Eh, no, no.
We need to go now.
- Okay.
- Right away.
- Doll, I'm sorry.
- It's fine.
I'm so sorry.
I'll be right back.
I'll be really quick, okay? - Yeah, it's cool.
- There's a remote here.
- Yeah.
- Oh, thank you.
I don't I think you just press that one.
See you in a bit.
- Good luck.
I love you.
- I love you.
Hello, um, is this Emily's house? I'm Dolly and I'm working with Emily.
I'm her best friend, but I'm working for her and I'm gonna be staying here.
Like you're working for Emily, I'll be working for Emily.
So, what does an assistant do? Like, do I make you breakfast? - No, no.
- You sure? You definitely don't have to make me breakfast.
They have it there on the set every day.
Should I make coffee or get you coffee or tea or something? You'd have to get up too early.
- No, it's fine.
I don't mind that.
- Really, I don't need coffee.
- You sure? - Yeah.
I mean, I can tell you what kind of coffee I like just in case there's a time in the day that You know, it's just a You know that.
- Latte.
- It's just a latte, yeah.
- Okay, I'll just get you a latte.
- Yeah, that's perfect.
Really easy.
So what else? But tell them to make it rely frothy.
- A really frothy latte.
- Frothy latte.
Just ask for loads of frothy milk.
- Good, okay, latte frothy latte.
- Yeah, that's it.
- And then - And three shots.
Okay, I'll get a latte, frothy latte, three shots.
- Okay, what else? - In a medium-sized cup.
'Cause otherwise it gets too weak if it's in a big cup.
A frothy latte, three shots, in a medium cup.
- Yeah, that's about it.
- Okay, cool.
And then do I wash your clothes, or wash your - No.
- No? Oh, my God.
That would be so creepy.
No, I've got a cleaning lady that does that.
Okay, then I come with you in the car to work.
Great if you could drive me.
Sorry, Doll.
You look terrified.
No, I'll be fine.
What how Anyway, it's not the point.
The point of you being here is just you being here.
I don't care about any of this stupid stuff.
- I want to get it right.
- I know, you will.
You're amazing.
You're so sweet.
No, but I'm gonna get you a frothy latte Come on, just put down your pad and your pen and just "chillax".
Doll, come on.
- Oh, God.
- Just enjoy being here.
Enjoy being free of all that nonsense at home.
Oh, God.
It is so nice being here.
- Isn't it nice? - Mm.
I think there's some ice cream in the fridge.
Yum.
- Do you want some? - Yes, please.
- I can get it.
- Oh, don't be daft.
I'll get it.
No, I'll get it.
All part of the job.
- Don't be stupid.
- I'm joking.
Is it part of the job? Okay, I think I'm getting closer.
Emily on speakerphone: Great! I'll be right on the corner.
- Destination ahead in 200 yards.
- Oh, shit.
- What's going on? - No one's letting me move over.
Doll, I can see you.
I'm waving! Can you see me? Yes, I can see you, but I can't stop! - Destination approach - Yoo-hoo, Doll! Doll! You drove right past me.
What are you doing? - I don't know what I'm doing.
- Recalculating route.
- Shut up! - What? No, it's the GPS.
I knew I shouldn't be driving 'round here.
Calm down, calm down, Doll.
Excuse me? Um, can Oh, my God.
It is you.
It is her.
Oh, my God, it's you.
- You have such a wonderful presence.
- Aw, thank you.
You just seem like such a kind spirit.
Honestly, you and Jennifer garner are the only women I'm okay with my husband calling hot 'cause you are! Oh, my God.
Can I have a hug? Yes.
Yes, of course.
Oh, my goodness, thanks.
Thank you so much.
You've made my day.
Get a picture of us hugging.
Okay, great, great.
I'm just here.
I'm right here, ready and waiting.
- Sorry, it's my driver.
- Oh, no.
Thank you.
Hey, you, come.
Em! I can't, Em! Oh, for fuck's sake! What are you doing now? You just drove right past me again.
It's fine.
She's my best friend.
Imagine if I talked to you like that.
Wow.
- Um, picture? - Yes, of course.
Oh, my God.
"For fuck's sake.
" It's cute when you say it, though.
Okay.
That was good, I thought.
- Really? - Yeah, no, it was really good.
I mean, I thought you were amazing.
I thought that the flowers Is that off-putting? - Such a big bunch of flowers.
- Yeah, no, I know.
It sort of feels mean to give you Did that look really awkward? No, not at all.
You looked amazing.
I just didn't understand.
You were doing your job really well.
Why was she giving you, sort of, 40 flowers? - How can anyone - Ugh, God.
Then they sort of they just got them out of a bucket, so they were sort of dripping a bit.
No, no, I know exactly what you mean.
- Shit.
- No, it wasn't.
It was honestly, I wouldn't have even brought it up.
You did a brilliant job.
Great.
- Oh, I guess I should just move on.
- No, it's I shouldn't think about it.
I'm gonna try and just get on with the next one now.
So, what's the is that - I can't worry about what - 'Course not.
No, no, 'course not.
I'm just gonna really try and concentrate on this one.
- Is it the crying scene next? - Yes.
- How do you think? How do you feel? - Yeah, ugh.
- Terrible.
I'm gonna be terrible.
- No, you're not.
I am.
I can't bear to cry.
You know I can't.
It's so stupid.
I cry every day in real life, and then I come onto a set and I can't squeeze tears out.
I think you can, though.
I think if you think of the right trigger No, I can't.
What I always do is I think about John, I think about my dad.
I have this picture in my head of when he died, basically.
We were lying on his bed and he was just so still and sort of peaceful, and then for a massive trigger, I think of I think about him in his coffin and I sort of try and imagine what are the best pajamas or whatever, and I picture these, um These white pajamas and they've got piping around the sleeves - and the collar - Yeah, Doll.
I think about my dad.
I think about him dying.
I think about him in his wheelchair, all frail and whatever.
I sometimes imagine him I tried imagining him going up to heaven through the clouds and waving goodbye to me, and I put music over it in my nothing works.
It's so weird.
I can feel very, very, very sad, I can feel like I'm on the verge of crying or I've got some sort of You know, I feel emotional, but I can't actually force the tears out.
It's the weirdest thing.
Oh, my God, Doll.
You're so brilliant.
- Doll.
- It's not, it just it just works.
It's, like, a trick.
But it's not a well, shit, I wish I could do that trick.
You can, you just have to really focus on it.
- Just sort of - God, I know.
God, I'm jealous.
- But, um - You should be doing it.
I can just run lines, if you want.
Anyway, I should I just really need to Focus? Just yes, block out everything for a second - and just get on with it.
- Yeah, definitely.
That's what you should do.
Um I think you should just trust yourself.
- Yeah.
- Sort of Yep, I'm really just gonna get it in there.
I'll just go and see if Luke is out here 'cause he'll know what time we're getting on with it.
"Well, why didn't you call me?" "Well, why didn't you call me?" "I didn't think it was my place.
" "I didn't think it was my place.
" "I didn't think it was my place to " "Well, why didn't you call me?" What? "What?" You know what? You are very easy, too, eh? - Oh.
- Yes, beautiful skin I've got a great big spot on my chin that is not very beautiful.
Makeup artist: Everyone has a spot right now.
- Really? Yeah.
- It's the "in" thing.
You think it's the rest of the chocolate and everything? - I don't know.
- I think stress.
You're going to the fun stuff.
- Em? - Yeah? Do you need me to do anything before you go? Nothing.
You've got your dress ready and your shoes? Just go and lie out by the pool and indulge.
I was gonna finish off that little tiny bit of chocolate cake in the fridge.
- Of course.
- Okay, good.
And I've got masses You know, any of those creams I really wish you were coming.
I'm so sorry we couldn't get another ticket.
No, no, I totally understand.
I'm gonna have such a nice time.
See you later.
I think it will be nice.
I hope it is.
It will definitely be nice.
Bye.
- Call me later! - I will.
Em? Em? Emmy? Em! Cuckoo! Doll? Dolly? Dolly? Doll! Doll? Dolly? Oh, my God.
What are you doing? Doll, it was the shit-est evening I have ever endured.
He sat me next to Karen.
Dolly, can you believe it? The insensitivity of these assholes These agents that pretend Spend their whole life pretending they're so sort of into you, so care about you, and then do that, you know? It's just outrageous.
Whoop! Jesus Christ, that was just grotesque.
It was so miserable.
I can't tell you.
What's the matter with you? What's the matter with me? Are you saying that, really? What's the matter with me? I've been sitting outside there, Em, since you had your fucking hair done and locked me out.
I've been on that chair for about 12 hours! - What do you mean I locked you out? - I couldn't get in! I did not lock you out! What the fuck are you talking about? Well, how come I couldn't get in? Every single I don't know how you couldn't get in.
I don't know, maybe the door locked behind itself.
I'm sorry! I'm sorry.
God! I'm sorry.
Shit, I'm so, so sorry.
I had no idea.
How was I meant to know? I'm sorry, sweetheart.
I'm sorry.
God, we've both had terrible days.
Fucking hell.
Oh, my God.
My day might have been just a tiny bit worse.
I haven't eaten.
I didn't have any breakfast.
Went out what time was it when you left? I didn't have anything to eat.
I've been sitting out there.
I'm so, so, so, so, so sorry.
I was shouting.
I was calling you over all the walls.
- Your neighbors weren't even in.
- Oh, my God.
Oh, my God, that sounds horrible.
That sounds like a complete fucking nightmare.
I'm so sorry.
God, well, I hardly ate anything.
It was disgusting.
The food was just awful.
It was like this sort of tepid gray beef and I don't know what else.
Freezing air-conditioning blasting at me all night long, and that girl just jabbering on and on and on and on and on and on.
Jabber, jabber, jabber, all night long in my ear.
- I want to go home.
- Don't say that.
Don't say that.
Oh, sweetheart.
Don't say that.
You're gonna make me feel terrible.
Come on.
I can't do anything right.
I felt like such a moron.
Like a stupid person and a stupid assistant.
You're not a stupid person.
You're the most brilliant person.
And you're an amazing assistant.
You're the best assistant in the whole wide world.
The best assistant that ever lived, ever.
- Really? - Yes.
Budge over.
You're the best friend that anyone could ever have.
That's what a good assistant would say.
Maybe.
- Morning.
- Hey.
Hey, how are you? I'm all right.
How are you? Good.
Here, let me know if that's frothy enough.
Wow.
"Three-shot foamy latte.
" - Mm, perfect.
- Good.
- Delicious.
- Great.
Where'd you get it? Café de leche, my favorite.
Great.
What time did you have to get up to get it? - I got up at 6:15.
- God.
Thank you.
So, you've got that dinner tonight my pleasure.
You've got that dinner tonight at 8:00.
- What dinner? - With Ian and Nancy.
Oh, shit, yes.
Fuck.
And your dress is at the dry cleaner's, so I'll get it at lunchtime, and your shoes are just in there, so I can take them now if you want or I'll bring them later.
- Where are the shoes? - Just in here.
Wow.
Wow.
- Thank you.
- Not at all.
Doll, so impressive.
Oh, no, not at all.
Look at us.
This is really working out.
Come on, I feel really good about this.
Yeah, I feel really good about this.