Duts (2010) s01e01 Episode Script
Jinseng
What should I give that man then? Olives, hey Walter.
Ah yes, olives.
And where do you think? The Colruyt.
Oh, I gotta go to school.
What do you have? Gymnastics, Pfft.
Allee, rap then.
Yes, say.
Hahahaha.
What is it, Annie? At the crabs? Eh Yes, yes.
But Me too, me too, I have that too.
But I can not turn back the clock anyway, you know that right? What? What? What? Dog barks Goddamn! Waf, waf, waf.
Leave the dog alone! Dog barked and BABY CRIES Enter.
What? What? Yoo-hoo! BABY CRIES I am, though.
What is it? Pieces? No, but I can not get there to ride.
Chips, chips, crisps, chips, chips.
Chips.
No, no, no.
Ikke.
Paging: Order 158 is ready to butcher.
Pfrt! Bah! Mmmmmm Mmmm But Why the helmet? It is a 50 cc, hey.
No, no.
A handkerchief, and salt on it.
Allee, mammy.
Yes, and under your armpit.
You know, I sweat like a cow.
But under my armpit: Nobody is saying that I stink.
TIROLER MUSIC ON TV BABY CRIES THE CALL IS Duts sir, you wish to insure your motorcycle? Yes.
Eh Come on.
Then we have the papers but once bijpakken.
Say it again.
What brand is it? Eh Jinseng.
Jinseng, is that with a J? Eh Yes.
Chassis number? Oops, I do not know.
Then I have to go see.
Eh Where is that? Ah.
So That's the motorcycle? Then we do not need.
But that's nothing.
Then we take another paper.
Jinseng, 50 cc, chassis number But, sir Duts, now something else.
What I am somewhat concerned about That is that this house is insured under its value.
Yes, your mother was rather cautious.
You must know: This house is not insured for very basic things.
I think of fire.
Lightning.
Theft.
What a plague it is today, Walter.
And water.
Now I have an in eresting polisje.
So how does it all in down? First: And that was two hours.
And that was three hours.
MUSIC AND BABY crying TIROLER And that was four hours.
And that was five hours.
And the afternoon was.
BABY MAKES CRAZY sound BABY sound HE MUSIC LOUDER And of course: Terrorism.
What's so special about this polisje? So extra for a small fee.
Nuclear terrorism.
That means that from now insured for Al Qaeda.
And the Taliban.
BABY CRIES Come see now.
So I became crazy about him.
Yes, I understand.
When I see him there I will agree with our Kenny Oh, nuts.
Taliban, yes, it says.
SLIK MAKES LOUD NOISES No.
No.
No.
No.
Mr.
Duts, the toilet, please.
Eh Along here.
THE CALL IS Ouch.
Eh Sorry.
Annie! Walter, now you see it.
That is our Kenny.
Who draws it? Who draws it? They say it all, huh.
KENNY CRIES No.
No.
No.
No.
Aaaah Ooooh Wait, it will be done here rap.
Just see what Just see what What I smell here? What I smell here? Oooooh Ooooh Ohohoho No! No! No! No! No, no.
No! No! No! Oh, no.
No! No No! No! No! What? I can not, Connie! Then, do you, Danny.
Yes, that incision.
I see all the time incision before my eyes.
Our Kenny with his thick head That is it cured? I'm just not exciting.
Hihihi, yeah You Anniiiieeee! Danny! Please you our Kenny? Amai, who has a thick head.
Duts sir! The paper is! Duts sir! Paper! It's on! No, not my policies.
Are you going to hang back now? HE babbles AGAINST BABY Where is our Kenny? Outside.
How? Alone? No, Walter.
No, no, no, no.
You can be anything, huh! And I'm really late.
Hold down once my kepi.
Hey! No, Danny! And laugh too, and laugh too! Oh! I am a witness.
VOTES ARE CLOSER Walter, Walter, Walter, Walter Boy anyway.
What did you do it again.
Allee Say I thought you really I saw you, and I thought: Not on our Kenny! Not on our Kenny! Yes Then it became black before my eyes.
Sorry, kid.
It's nothing that can happen to anyone.
Yes, it can happen to anyone.
Say, but We can not control your family? You have a family? No.
That there yet.
But that is a matter of paper, huh.
Yes, wrap it up.
THE CALL IS Where should I put? Huh? The order, where should I put? You can not.
Walter Duts.
End Goor 44.
Yes, it is here.
Character than once.
What is it, Walter? Oh They are here with paper.
Paper? Here.
Oh, sir, that must have been a mistake.
Hohohoho! That man is all alone, who never gets on.
(His mother has just come to go.
) (And he has sometimes ) Blackouts! Blackouts? It will not.
Check it Danny! Walter, what exactly happened? Eh You've beaten my face first.
And then my jar smashed.
Allee yes, sometimes, huh.
Phone rings Duts sir, I have to go.
If you do want to draw Read this.
Oh! Oops, oops Oh, damn! Hey, hey, hey! Now you should definitely sign.
You've opened.
We can not catch up with him.
Back Packs, we should not.
Oops, oops, oops, what have I done now.
Sorry, Walter.
It's nothing, Annie.
I will only sign, surely? But that will never, sir.
Oh, that's rap, though.
Yeah, that's rap, though.
See? I'll pick something about, Walter.
Phone rings Drolleke calling.
It is exactly urgent.
No.
No, no.
I mean, yes.
Yes, yes.
Yes, can drollekes urgent.
Have a nice day.
Jos, we are gone.
Allee, young.
You belong to the municipality.
And long? Two weeks.
Allee young.
And are there still so? Duts sir, I need really urgent away.
And if you are drawing, you can today, what I say Subiet all with your moped, er, your bike riding.
Seriously? First the family, for that accident just now.
Because that was a mistake and a mistake is an accident, huh? Right? Mr.
Geudens.
But say Philippe.
Right, Philippe? Yes, but That's only paper only.
Yes, but Yes, yes, a post-natal depression.
Ooooh.
Oooh.
What? No, no.
What? My wife.
She's uh She is Oops, oops.
She fell.
Ooooh.
Yes, now I really Duts sir? Is it bad? Duts sir? (SOUNDS DISTORTED EAR IN HERMAN) Duts Sir! Danny! Lay off him once.
Step off again.
Unpack once established.
Unpack once established.
Shoot.
Shoot.
Yes, but Shoot.
I wear a bulletproof vest.
(CUSH) Walter! Walter! Where were we? Where were you, I do not know.
But we certainly were here.
Hahaha! Ah yes, my moped.
If you would be so kind to do this drawing Then I can For my wife In the hospital.
Phone beeps Hey! And the family? DOOR IS CLOSED And not even a hello.
Walter.
Mhm.
Look at there.
Why? Do you miss anything? A towel or something.
MUSIC: Ode to Joy Pom pom pom pom Hihihi, mmmmmm Lololalalolola tiediediedududum Tariampampalalalam Pom pom pom pom pooom Tiedie rampampararampan Allee Yes.
It's not true.
Yes.
The pervert.
Hahahaha! He hums I am, though.
You said you did not stay away long.
Yes, but something intervened.
Philippe Deceiving me? But Drolleke Phone rings Awel, should not you pick? No.
Is she? No.
But pick up.
No.
But
Ah yes, olives.
And where do you think? The Colruyt.
Oh, I gotta go to school.
What do you have? Gymnastics, Pfft.
Allee, rap then.
Yes, say.
Hahahaha.
What is it, Annie? At the crabs? Eh Yes, yes.
But Me too, me too, I have that too.
But I can not turn back the clock anyway, you know that right? What? What? What? Dog barks Goddamn! Waf, waf, waf.
Leave the dog alone! Dog barked and BABY CRIES Enter.
What? What? Yoo-hoo! BABY CRIES I am, though.
What is it? Pieces? No, but I can not get there to ride.
Chips, chips, crisps, chips, chips.
Chips.
No, no, no.
Ikke.
Paging: Order 158 is ready to butcher.
Pfrt! Bah! Mmmmmm Mmmm But Why the helmet? It is a 50 cc, hey.
No, no.
A handkerchief, and salt on it.
Allee, mammy.
Yes, and under your armpit.
You know, I sweat like a cow.
But under my armpit: Nobody is saying that I stink.
TIROLER MUSIC ON TV BABY CRIES THE CALL IS Duts sir, you wish to insure your motorcycle? Yes.
Eh Come on.
Then we have the papers but once bijpakken.
Say it again.
What brand is it? Eh Jinseng.
Jinseng, is that with a J? Eh Yes.
Chassis number? Oops, I do not know.
Then I have to go see.
Eh Where is that? Ah.
So That's the motorcycle? Then we do not need.
But that's nothing.
Then we take another paper.
Jinseng, 50 cc, chassis number But, sir Duts, now something else.
What I am somewhat concerned about That is that this house is insured under its value.
Yes, your mother was rather cautious.
You must know: This house is not insured for very basic things.
I think of fire.
Lightning.
Theft.
What a plague it is today, Walter.
And water.
Now I have an in eresting polisje.
So how does it all in down? First: And that was two hours.
And that was three hours.
MUSIC AND BABY crying TIROLER And that was four hours.
And that was five hours.
And the afternoon was.
BABY MAKES CRAZY sound BABY sound HE MUSIC LOUDER And of course: Terrorism.
What's so special about this polisje? So extra for a small fee.
Nuclear terrorism.
That means that from now insured for Al Qaeda.
And the Taliban.
BABY CRIES Come see now.
So I became crazy about him.
Yes, I understand.
When I see him there I will agree with our Kenny Oh, nuts.
Taliban, yes, it says.
SLIK MAKES LOUD NOISES No.
No.
No.
No.
Mr.
Duts, the toilet, please.
Eh Along here.
THE CALL IS Ouch.
Eh Sorry.
Annie! Walter, now you see it.
That is our Kenny.
Who draws it? Who draws it? They say it all, huh.
KENNY CRIES No.
No.
No.
No.
Aaaah Ooooh Wait, it will be done here rap.
Just see what Just see what What I smell here? What I smell here? Oooooh Ooooh Ohohoho No! No! No! No! No, no.
No! No! No! Oh, no.
No! No No! No! No! What? I can not, Connie! Then, do you, Danny.
Yes, that incision.
I see all the time incision before my eyes.
Our Kenny with his thick head That is it cured? I'm just not exciting.
Hihihi, yeah You Anniiiieeee! Danny! Please you our Kenny? Amai, who has a thick head.
Duts sir! The paper is! Duts sir! Paper! It's on! No, not my policies.
Are you going to hang back now? HE babbles AGAINST BABY Where is our Kenny? Outside.
How? Alone? No, Walter.
No, no, no, no.
You can be anything, huh! And I'm really late.
Hold down once my kepi.
Hey! No, Danny! And laugh too, and laugh too! Oh! I am a witness.
VOTES ARE CLOSER Walter, Walter, Walter, Walter Boy anyway.
What did you do it again.
Allee Say I thought you really I saw you, and I thought: Not on our Kenny! Not on our Kenny! Yes Then it became black before my eyes.
Sorry, kid.
It's nothing that can happen to anyone.
Yes, it can happen to anyone.
Say, but We can not control your family? You have a family? No.
That there yet.
But that is a matter of paper, huh.
Yes, wrap it up.
THE CALL IS Where should I put? Huh? The order, where should I put? You can not.
Walter Duts.
End Goor 44.
Yes, it is here.
Character than once.
What is it, Walter? Oh They are here with paper.
Paper? Here.
Oh, sir, that must have been a mistake.
Hohohoho! That man is all alone, who never gets on.
(His mother has just come to go.
) (And he has sometimes ) Blackouts! Blackouts? It will not.
Check it Danny! Walter, what exactly happened? Eh You've beaten my face first.
And then my jar smashed.
Allee yes, sometimes, huh.
Phone rings Duts sir, I have to go.
If you do want to draw Read this.
Oh! Oops, oops Oh, damn! Hey, hey, hey! Now you should definitely sign.
You've opened.
We can not catch up with him.
Back Packs, we should not.
Oops, oops, oops, what have I done now.
Sorry, Walter.
It's nothing, Annie.
I will only sign, surely? But that will never, sir.
Oh, that's rap, though.
Yeah, that's rap, though.
See? I'll pick something about, Walter.
Phone rings Drolleke calling.
It is exactly urgent.
No.
No, no.
I mean, yes.
Yes, yes.
Yes, can drollekes urgent.
Have a nice day.
Jos, we are gone.
Allee, young.
You belong to the municipality.
And long? Two weeks.
Allee young.
And are there still so? Duts sir, I need really urgent away.
And if you are drawing, you can today, what I say Subiet all with your moped, er, your bike riding.
Seriously? First the family, for that accident just now.
Because that was a mistake and a mistake is an accident, huh? Right? Mr.
Geudens.
But say Philippe.
Right, Philippe? Yes, but That's only paper only.
Yes, but Yes, yes, a post-natal depression.
Ooooh.
Oooh.
What? No, no.
What? My wife.
She's uh She is Oops, oops.
She fell.
Ooooh.
Yes, now I really Duts sir? Is it bad? Duts sir? (SOUNDS DISTORTED EAR IN HERMAN) Duts Sir! Danny! Lay off him once.
Step off again.
Unpack once established.
Unpack once established.
Shoot.
Shoot.
Yes, but Shoot.
I wear a bulletproof vest.
(CUSH) Walter! Walter! Where were we? Where were you, I do not know.
But we certainly were here.
Hahaha! Ah yes, my moped.
If you would be so kind to do this drawing Then I can For my wife In the hospital.
Phone beeps Hey! And the family? DOOR IS CLOSED And not even a hello.
Walter.
Mhm.
Look at there.
Why? Do you miss anything? A towel or something.
MUSIC: Ode to Joy Pom pom pom pom Hihihi, mmmmmm Lololalalolola tiediediedududum Tariampampalalalam Pom pom pom pom pooom Tiedie rampampararampan Allee Yes.
It's not true.
Yes.
The pervert.
Hahahaha! He hums I am, though.
You said you did not stay away long.
Yes, but something intervened.
Philippe Deceiving me? But Drolleke Phone rings Awel, should not you pick? No.
Is she? No.
But pick up.
No.
But