Ed, Edd n Eddy (1999) s01e01 Episode Script
The Ed-Touchables/Nagged to Ed
1
[WHISTLE]
YEAH!
4,820, 4,824,
OOH, I LIKE WHAT YOU'VE
DONE WITH THAT TUNNEL.
4,831, 4,835.
THAT'S EVERYBODY.
4,837.
[DOORBELL RINGS]
HMM?
[DING DONG]
[RAPID RINGING]
HMM.
[DING DONG]
NOW, PLEASE!
[DING DONG]
AAH!
[DING DONG]
HEY, DOUBLE-D! WHA
TOOK YOU SO LONG?
OH, HELLO, EDDY.
SO WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
HEY, WAS THAT YOU
RINGING MY DOORBELL?
WHO, ME?
NAH.
WAIT, EDDY. YOU KNOW THE RULES.
AW, COME ON, EDD. NOT AGAIN.
[GROAN] ALL RIGHT!
SHEESH! STUPID SLIPPERS.
AND I'll DISPOSE OF THESE.
OK. THE SLIPPERS
ARE ON NOW OOOFF!
WE'LL HAVE YOU
CLEAN IN NO TIME, EDDY.
ALMOST DONE.
GEE, THANKS, EDD.
AFTER YOU, EDDY.
YEAH. AFTER ME.
WAAA-HOO!
EDDY!
MESSY, MESSY, MESSY
PLEASE DON'T DO THAT, EDDY.
UHH!
EDDY!
PLEASE RETURN THOSE LABELS
TO THEIR RIGHTFUL DESIGNATIONS.
ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT!
DON'T HAVE A BIRD.
ARE YOU DONE YET?
LET'S GO GET ED!
PLEASE BE PATIENT.
I HAVE JUST ONE MORE AAAAGH!
IT'S GONE!
EDDY!
SOMEONE TOOK MY
MAGNIFYING GLASS.
I FEEL SO VIOLATED.
MAYBE YOU MISPLACED IT.
NEVER!
WHAT HAS BECOME OF THIS WORLD?
IS NOTHING SACRED?
EVERYTHING IS SOILED!
WHO WOULD DO SUCH A THING?
WHO WOULD VIOLATE THE
SANCTITY OF SOMEBODY'S ROOM
WITH THEIR FILTHY HANDS? OH!
OH, EDDY I FEEL SICK!
OOH, I FEEL NAUSEOUS!
I CAN'T BREATHE!
THANK YOU. I NEEDED THAT.
ANYTIME, PAL.
YOU KNOW, YOU CAN'
HAVE SOMEBODY
TOUCHING YOUR STUFF.
IT JUST ISN'T RIGHT.
OK! RACE YOU TO ED'S PLACE!
WHOO!
THERE HE IS.
HUH HUH HUH
OOH!
SHH.
[WHISPERS] Quit fooling around.
HEY, EDDY!
WHAT'S UP?
DOGPILE!
HIYA, DOUBLE-D.
YOU GUYS MAKE ME LAUGH.
[STOMPING]
WHERE IS SHE?
WHAT? WHO?
MY DOLLY.
POLLY POO POO, THAT'S WHO.
[SCREECHES]
I I NEED MY DOLLY.
BUT SARAH, I DIDN'T TOUCH HER.
LIAR!
DON'T YOU LIE TO ME,
YOU DOLLY STEALER!
YOU GOT TO LOVE
THESE FAMILY MOMENTS.
IF YOU DON'T TELL
ME WHERE SHE IS,
REALLY ANGRY!
[CRASH]
[COUGH COUGH]
UH ED?
YEAH, EDDY?
AS MUCH AS I REALLY
LOVE THE SMELL
OF YOUR STINKY PITS,
CAN YOU LET GO OF MY HEAD NOW?
YOU KNOW, SOMEONE HAS
TOUCHED MY STUFF ALSO.
REALLY?
DON'T YOU SEE
WHAT'S GOING ON HERE?
IT'S EPIDEMICAL.
DOUBLE-D'S MAGNIFYING
GLASS, SARAH'S DOLL.
OOF!
SOMEONE OR SOMETHING
IS TOUCHING EVERYBODY'S STUFF.
WE GOT TO SPREAD THE WORD.
WE HAVE TO WARN
EVERYONE THAT'S THERE'S A
A SERIAL TOUCHER ON THE LOOSE.
HOW ARE WE GOING
TO DO THAT, EDDY?
HEY! I KNOW JUST WHAT TO DO!
HA HA HA HA HA!
ATTENTION, PLEASE!
HEY! BEWARE OF THE TOUCHER!
SERIAL TOUCHER ON THE LOOSE!
HIDE YOUR STUFF!
HIDE YOUR VALUABLES!
SERIAL TOUCHER ON THE LOOSE!
THAT DIRTY TOUCHER
TOOK MY DOLLY POO POO!
AAH! AAH!
IT'S TRUE. WON'
SOMEBODY HELP US?
[WORRIED CHATTER]
QUIET! QUIET!
EVERYONE JUST RELAX!
WE'VE GOT IT ALL UNDER CONTROL.
YEAH? WHAT CAN YOU
DORKS DO ABOUT IT?
DORKS ARE GONNA
SOLVE THIS MYSTERY.
HA! I'D PAY MONEY TO SEE THAT.
ME, TOO.
YEAH, WE ALL WOULD.
WHAT DO YOU PROPOSE WE DO NOW?
OK, BOYS. HERE'S THE LANE, OK?
WE'LL START HERE,
THEN WE'LL CROSS THE STREE
OVER BY THE CORNER STORE
Edd: PLEASE DO NOT MOVE.
THIS IS DELICATE WORK.
HA HA HA HA HA!
THERE'S NO WAY THE
TOUCHER CAN RESIST THIS.
PERFECT.
SOMEONE'S COMING.
ED, DON'T MOVE.
AND STOP GIGGLING!
DORK! DORK?
SHH! ED, SOMEBODY
ELSE IS COMING.
WHATCHA DOING, ED?
OH, ED, I'M LIKING YOUR HAIRCUT.
WHAT'S THAT, PLANK?
YOU WANT A FEEL, TOO?
OK.
ED'S BEEN TOUCHED. PULL! PULL!
[BELLS AND SIRENS]
AHA! DR. TOUCHER, I PRESUME?
WHOA! YOU GUYS ARE WEIRD!
GET HIM!
Eddy: COME ON!
WAY!
HE'S GETTING AWAY!
FOLLOW ME!
[PANT PANT]
UFF!
UHH!
AAH!
OH OH THEY
GOT ME, OLD BUDDY.
BUT YOU YOU CAN
STILL MAKE IT, PLANK!
RUN!
SAVE YOURSELF.
BE NICE! AWW!
HEY, JONNY, NICE HAIRCUT.
DOUBLE-D'S GOT A
SURPRISE FOR YOU.
A LIE DETECTOR.
READY.
BETTER WATCH
WHAT YOU SAY, JONNY.
YEAH, JONNY.
HEH HEH HEH
YOU WOULDN'T LIE TO YOUR
PALS NOW, WOULD YOU?
ED, LIGHT.
ALL RIGHT, JONNY.
ENOUGH FOOLING AROUND.
SO, WHY DON'T YOU JUST TELL US
WHERE EVERYBODY'S STUFF IS, HMM?
I DON'T KNOW WHA
YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT.
I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING!
WHAT'S THE WORD, DOUBLE-D?
[SNIFF SNIFF]
INCONCLUSIVE, EDDY.
ARRRGGH!
WELL, IF YOU WON'T TALK,
MAYBE YOUR FRIEND WILL!
YOU MUST BE THE BRAINS, HUH?
WHERE'S THE STUFF,
PLANKY? FESS UP!
OH SILENT, HUH?
AAAAAAGGGH!
SPLINTERS!
AAAH! LEAVE PLANK ALONE, EDDY!
[DING]
[SNIFF]
AS YOU CAN SEE,
THE BOARD IS LYING.
WELL, PLANKY?
I THINK IT'S TIME WE
TRIED OTHER METHODS.
THIS WILL MAKE
YOU SWELL UP GOOD.
AW! OHH
OHHH
[DRIP DRIP DRIP]
[MOANING]
[DRIP DRIP DRIP]
[DRIP DRIP DRIP DRIP]
AAAAAH!
OK! OK! I DID IT! I TOOK
EVERYONE'S STUFF!
NOW LET ME GO! I GOTTA
GO TO THE BATHROOM!
YOU HEARD HIM,
BOYS. CASE CLOSED.
AAH! OOH! EEE! AUGH!
AAH! OHH!
[JINGLES]
SO, BOYS,
WHAT'S BIG, ROUND,
COSTS A NICKEL
JAWBREAKERS! JAWBREAKERS!
NOW AWAY WE GO!
NOW JUST A ROTTEN MINUTE.
I FOUND MY DOLLY UNDER MY BED.
IT'S TRUE.
AND HERE SHE IS, SEE?
Edd: EXCUSE ME, EDDY,
AHEM, UPON FURTHER
INSPECTION OF MY PERSON,
I SEEM TO HAVE COME ACROSS
MY MAGNIFYING GLASS.
HELP!
HEH HEH THAT EDDY
THINKS HE'S SO SMART.
WE KNOW YOU DIDN'T DO IT, JONNY.
THANK YOU HANG TIGHT, JONNY.
THIS WON'T HURT A BIT.
SHOULD WE FEEL GUILTY
ABOUT JONNY'S PREDICAMENT?
NAH. YOU KNOW WHAT THEY SAY
A LITTLE CHILDHOOD
TRAUMA BUILDS CHARACTER.
OHH! AAH! WHOA!
COME ON! GET THE JAWBREAKERS!
Edd: NOT SO FAST, LITTLE FELLA.
I SAW THIS THING IN A MOVIE,
I MADE A THORAX.
ANTS CHECK,
MILLIPEDES, CHECK, MOTHS
YEAH. IT'S A BUG.
WELL, EDDY, THE TIME HAS ARRIVED
FOR MY MONTHLY
INSECT EXPEDITION.
A PAIR OF GALOSHES
AND STERILE GLOVES
TO AVOID BACTERIA AND GERMS.
OH, INSECTS BUG ME.
POUR VOU.
OK, READY!
CHECK!
[INFLATES]
[CRASH]
SO, LET US PROCEED
TO THE FOREST.
FOLLOW NATURE BOY.
ISN'T IT MAGNIFICENT?
ALL THE SPLENDORS OF NATURE,
DISPLAYED IN ONE GIAN
PETRI DISH FULL OF LIFE!
[GULP]
I THINK I SWALLOWED A BUG.
[CRACK] WHAT WAS THAT?
[OWL HOOTING]
THAT'S IT!
THIS NATURE STUFF'S
FOR THE BIRDS!
WHOAAAAAH!
EDDY? EDDY?
WHOA, WAY BIG!
IT'S A MASTERPIECE OF NATURE.
LOOKS LIKE MY
GRANDMOTHER'S HAIR NET.
WELL, LET'S GO, GUYS.
ED!
GET DOWN, YOU MANIAC!
YEE-HA! IT'S STICKY!
YOU'RE DISTURBING
THE ECO-ENVIRONMENT.
[LAUGHTER]
UH, WHAT WAS THAT?
NOW YOU'VE DONE
IT. ED, I SUGGEST
[LAUGHTER]
[GULP]
Voices: ED, EDD, AND EDDY,
SITTING IN A
TREE, K-I-S-S-I-N-G!
ED! GET OFF THAT THING!
HUH?
[LAUGHTER]
HELP ME, GUYS!
I DON'T WANT THE FLUIDS
DRAINED FROM MY BODY!
HOLD ON, ED!
WE'LL RESCUE YOU!
[GRUNTS]
ED, EDD, AND EDDY,
SITTING IN A TREE,
K-I-S-S-I-N-G!
[CRASH]
[LAUGHTER]
AAAAAAAH!
ED, EDD, AND EDDY,
SITTING IN A TREE,
K-I-S-S-I-N-G!
K-I-S-S-I-N-G!
AAAAAAAAH!
THERE'S A WAY OUT!
THROUGH THE TREES!
AAAAAAAAH!
[SPUTTERING]
HELP! QUICKSAND! HELP!
MY EYES!
[LAUGHTER]
AAH! AAH! AAH!
HEY, ED. SO HAPPY
YOU DROPPED IN.
HOPE YOU LIKE OUR DAD'S ROBES.
HUH?
HOW DID WE GET INTO THESE?
HUH!
EEEEYAAAAH!
[LAUGHING]
THIS IS NOT GOOD.
GO AHEAD, YELL. NO
ONE WILL HEAR YOU.
I'M MAY KANKER.
I'M MARIE KANKER.
AND I'M LEE KANKER.
WE'RE THE KANKER SISTERS.
WE JUST MOVED IN.
I'M EDDY.
I'M ED.
I'M WE KNOW, DOUBLE-D.
DON'T YOU WORRY ABOUT THAT.
UH, DO YOU GIRLS KNOW
WHERE OUR CLOTHES ARE?
THEY'RE DRYING OUTSIDE.
YOU BOYS SURE WERE DIRTY.
HUH?
WE'RE GONNA POP INTO
THE KITCHEN FOR A BIT, BOYS,
AND FIX UP SOME
HOME COOKING FOR YA.
WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK.
HEY! WAIT FOR ME!
THIS IS VERY STRANGE. LET'S GO.
HOLD IT, DOUBLE-D.
WHERE'S YOUR MANNERS?
THEY'RE NEW HERE.
AND THEY SAID THEY WERE
GONNA MAKE US SOME FOOD,
DIDN'T THEY?
SO, WHY DON'T WE JUS
HANG OUT FOR A BIT,
EAT FOR FREE, AND
THEN WE CAN SPLIT.
COME ON, LET'S
CHECK THIS PLACE OUT.
WHERE EXACTLY ARE WE?
LOOKS LIKE A POSTCARD I
SENT MY BROTHER ONCE.
AH, TV!
AW, IT'S A RERUN.
NICE SPACE HELMET.
TAKE ME TO YOUR PLUMBER.
NICE HEAD, ED.
GET IT? IT RHYMES!
"HEAD", "ED".
I CRACK ME UP.
HUBCAP DIGEST.
THIS BOOK HAS NO PRINT.
THESE PAGES ARE BLANK!
HA HA HA! LOOK! HA HA HA!
ARTWORK!
IT'S ED AND MAY! HOW CUTE!
Edd: IS THAT ME?
WHAT THE AAAAAAGH!
THAT'S NOT FUNNY!
Marie: OK, BOYS.
COME AND GET SOME NICE,
COLD, DELICIOUS POWDERED MILK.
Ed: THANKS. Edd:
THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
[COUGH COUGH]
Marie: HOW ABOUT A VIDEO?
FISHBOWL 2 A CLASSIC.
AH. AH. AH.
IT'S SO NICE TO
HAVE THE BOYS HOME.
DOING THE FISH STICKS!
THEN GIVE ME THE SQUEEZE-IT LOG!
GIRLS, SHUT UP!
WE GOT LUNCH TO MAKE.
THE WAY TO A MAN'S HEAR
IS THROUGH HIS ARTERIES.
AND A LITTLE KANKER
SECRET SAUCE
KETCHUP!
DINNER'S READY!
AHH
AHH THEY'RE SO DREAMY.
HA HA HA HA HA!
BE BACK IN A MINUTE, BOYS.
YEAH. WE'RE GONNA
GO AND FRESHEN UP.
AHH
[BURP]
HEE HEE HEE HEE.
WE'RE BACK!
NOTICE ANYTHING NEW, EDDY?
THE FINEST IN
PROCESSED PRODUCTS.
ONLY THE BEST FOR YOU.
HEY, HOW ABOUT A REFILL ON
THAT POWDERED MILK STUFF?
DO YOU LIKE OUR
KANKER BURGER, BIG ED?
IT'S GOOD. YEAH!
DON'T TALK WITH YOUR
MOUTH FULL, MISTER!
AAH!
PLEASE REFRAIN FROM
TOUCHING ME WHEN I'M EATING.
THANK YOU.
HMMP!
I'll TOUCH YOU WHENEVER
I WANT, BUDDY BOY!
IS THERE A PROBLEM?
EVERYTHING'S FINE!
HEY, MOVE IT! OUT OF THE WAY!
THIS IS THE BEST PART!
MOVE IT?
IT'S NOT GOOD ENOUGH
THAT WE'VE WORKED HARD
AND BROKEN OUR BACKS FOR YOU?
HUH?
IF THINGS DON'T CHANGE
AROUND HERE, WE'RE LEAVING!
IT'S TIME YOU GOOD-FOR-NOTHINGS
STARTED TO PULL OUR
OWN WEIGHT AROUND HERE!
WHAT'S UP WITH THEM?
CLEAN THIS MESS UP RIGHT NOW!
Lee: HEY! OVER HERE!
CLEAN THIS MESS!
HEY!
YOU CALL THAT CLEAN?
GET WASHING!
AND SCRUBBING!
COME ALONG, LITTLE MAN!
TIME TO CLEAN UP!
AAH!
HEH HEH HEH.
AND YOU!
MAKE IT SHINE!
ED, YOU'VE RUINED MY DISHES.
HEADING OUTSIDE, EDDY.
SLACKER.
THAT BETTER BE FIGHTING
OVER ME I HEAR IN THERE!
I'M GOING TO SANITIZE
THE LIVING AREA.
Eddy: OK.
I'll CLEAN THIS.
I'll CLEAN EVERYTHING!
SHINE IT UP NICE.
HEH HEH HEH.
Girls: HEY, MUD-TRACKER!
YOU'RE TRACKING MUD!
MUD?
UH-OH.
UHH!
YOU BETTER NO
WRECK DADDY'S BUCKET.
HANG THESE OUTSIDE.
OK, EDDY!
Lee: YOU SAILORS ARE ALL ALIKE.
[SILENCE]
YOU SHOULD GO BACK
TO DIVING FOR CLAMS.
THAT'S ENOUGH!
[WHIMPERING]
OK.
[WHIMPERING]
THIS IS THE THANKS WE
GET FOR OUR HARD WORK?
[CRYING]
UH-OH.
US GIRLS HAVE GOT TO
GET OURSELVES TOGETHER.
HAVEN'T YOU DONE
ENOUGH DAMAGE ALREADY?
NOW GET OUT OF HERE!
AND NEVER COME BACK!
WELL, YOU HEARD HER.
LET'S GO.
THIS HAS BEEN QUITE EDUCATIONAL.
HELLO, FREEDOM.
AAAAAAAGGGH!
JUST A MINUTE THERE
WHAT ABOUT EDDY JUNIOR?
HA HA HA!
AND ED JUNIOR?
DON'T FORGET DOUBLE-D JUNIOR!
AAAAH! AAAAH! AAAAH!
THAT'S IT!
RUN FOR IT!
AAAAAAAH!
THAT'S IT RUN, YOU COWARDS!
GET LOST!
AND DON'T TRIP ON
YOUR SHOELACES.
OH, LOOK AT THEM RUN.
JUST LIKE A REAL MAN.
I THINK I'M IN L-U-V, LOVE!
OHH OHH OHH
[LAUGHTER]
ED, EDD, AND EDDY!
YEAH!
[WHISTLE]
YEAH!
4,820, 4,824,
OOH, I LIKE WHAT YOU'VE
DONE WITH THAT TUNNEL.
4,831, 4,835.
THAT'S EVERYBODY.
4,837.
[DOORBELL RINGS]
HMM?
[DING DONG]
[RAPID RINGING]
HMM.
[DING DONG]
NOW, PLEASE!
[DING DONG]
AAH!
[DING DONG]
HEY, DOUBLE-D! WHA
TOOK YOU SO LONG?
OH, HELLO, EDDY.
SO WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
HEY, WAS THAT YOU
RINGING MY DOORBELL?
WHO, ME?
NAH.
WAIT, EDDY. YOU KNOW THE RULES.
AW, COME ON, EDD. NOT AGAIN.
[GROAN] ALL RIGHT!
SHEESH! STUPID SLIPPERS.
AND I'll DISPOSE OF THESE.
OK. THE SLIPPERS
ARE ON NOW OOOFF!
WE'LL HAVE YOU
CLEAN IN NO TIME, EDDY.
ALMOST DONE.
GEE, THANKS, EDD.
AFTER YOU, EDDY.
YEAH. AFTER ME.
WAAA-HOO!
EDDY!
MESSY, MESSY, MESSY
PLEASE DON'T DO THAT, EDDY.
UHH!
EDDY!
PLEASE RETURN THOSE LABELS
TO THEIR RIGHTFUL DESIGNATIONS.
ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT!
DON'T HAVE A BIRD.
ARE YOU DONE YET?
LET'S GO GET ED!
PLEASE BE PATIENT.
I HAVE JUST ONE MORE AAAAGH!
IT'S GONE!
EDDY!
SOMEONE TOOK MY
MAGNIFYING GLASS.
I FEEL SO VIOLATED.
MAYBE YOU MISPLACED IT.
NEVER!
WHAT HAS BECOME OF THIS WORLD?
IS NOTHING SACRED?
EVERYTHING IS SOILED!
WHO WOULD DO SUCH A THING?
WHO WOULD VIOLATE THE
SANCTITY OF SOMEBODY'S ROOM
WITH THEIR FILTHY HANDS? OH!
OH, EDDY I FEEL SICK!
OOH, I FEEL NAUSEOUS!
I CAN'T BREATHE!
THANK YOU. I NEEDED THAT.
ANYTIME, PAL.
YOU KNOW, YOU CAN'
HAVE SOMEBODY
TOUCHING YOUR STUFF.
IT JUST ISN'T RIGHT.
OK! RACE YOU TO ED'S PLACE!
WHOO!
THERE HE IS.
HUH HUH HUH
OOH!
SHH.
[WHISPERS] Quit fooling around.
HEY, EDDY!
WHAT'S UP?
DOGPILE!
HIYA, DOUBLE-D.
YOU GUYS MAKE ME LAUGH.
[STOMPING]
WHERE IS SHE?
WHAT? WHO?
MY DOLLY.
POLLY POO POO, THAT'S WHO.
[SCREECHES]
I I NEED MY DOLLY.
BUT SARAH, I DIDN'T TOUCH HER.
LIAR!
DON'T YOU LIE TO ME,
YOU DOLLY STEALER!
YOU GOT TO LOVE
THESE FAMILY MOMENTS.
IF YOU DON'T TELL
ME WHERE SHE IS,
REALLY ANGRY!
[CRASH]
[COUGH COUGH]
UH ED?
YEAH, EDDY?
AS MUCH AS I REALLY
LOVE THE SMELL
OF YOUR STINKY PITS,
CAN YOU LET GO OF MY HEAD NOW?
YOU KNOW, SOMEONE HAS
TOUCHED MY STUFF ALSO.
REALLY?
DON'T YOU SEE
WHAT'S GOING ON HERE?
IT'S EPIDEMICAL.
DOUBLE-D'S MAGNIFYING
GLASS, SARAH'S DOLL.
OOF!
SOMEONE OR SOMETHING
IS TOUCHING EVERYBODY'S STUFF.
WE GOT TO SPREAD THE WORD.
WE HAVE TO WARN
EVERYONE THAT'S THERE'S A
A SERIAL TOUCHER ON THE LOOSE.
HOW ARE WE GOING
TO DO THAT, EDDY?
HEY! I KNOW JUST WHAT TO DO!
HA HA HA HA HA!
ATTENTION, PLEASE!
HEY! BEWARE OF THE TOUCHER!
SERIAL TOUCHER ON THE LOOSE!
HIDE YOUR STUFF!
HIDE YOUR VALUABLES!
SERIAL TOUCHER ON THE LOOSE!
THAT DIRTY TOUCHER
TOOK MY DOLLY POO POO!
AAH! AAH!
IT'S TRUE. WON'
SOMEBODY HELP US?
[WORRIED CHATTER]
QUIET! QUIET!
EVERYONE JUST RELAX!
WE'VE GOT IT ALL UNDER CONTROL.
YEAH? WHAT CAN YOU
DORKS DO ABOUT IT?
DORKS ARE GONNA
SOLVE THIS MYSTERY.
HA! I'D PAY MONEY TO SEE THAT.
ME, TOO.
YEAH, WE ALL WOULD.
WHAT DO YOU PROPOSE WE DO NOW?
OK, BOYS. HERE'S THE LANE, OK?
WE'LL START HERE,
THEN WE'LL CROSS THE STREE
OVER BY THE CORNER STORE
Edd: PLEASE DO NOT MOVE.
THIS IS DELICATE WORK.
HA HA HA HA HA!
THERE'S NO WAY THE
TOUCHER CAN RESIST THIS.
PERFECT.
SOMEONE'S COMING.
ED, DON'T MOVE.
AND STOP GIGGLING!
DORK! DORK?
SHH! ED, SOMEBODY
ELSE IS COMING.
WHATCHA DOING, ED?
OH, ED, I'M LIKING YOUR HAIRCUT.
WHAT'S THAT, PLANK?
YOU WANT A FEEL, TOO?
OK.
ED'S BEEN TOUCHED. PULL! PULL!
[BELLS AND SIRENS]
AHA! DR. TOUCHER, I PRESUME?
WHOA! YOU GUYS ARE WEIRD!
GET HIM!
Eddy: COME ON!
WAY!
HE'S GETTING AWAY!
FOLLOW ME!
[PANT PANT]
UFF!
UHH!
AAH!
OH OH THEY
GOT ME, OLD BUDDY.
BUT YOU YOU CAN
STILL MAKE IT, PLANK!
RUN!
SAVE YOURSELF.
BE NICE! AWW!
HEY, JONNY, NICE HAIRCUT.
DOUBLE-D'S GOT A
SURPRISE FOR YOU.
A LIE DETECTOR.
READY.
BETTER WATCH
WHAT YOU SAY, JONNY.
YEAH, JONNY.
HEH HEH HEH
YOU WOULDN'T LIE TO YOUR
PALS NOW, WOULD YOU?
ED, LIGHT.
ALL RIGHT, JONNY.
ENOUGH FOOLING AROUND.
SO, WHY DON'T YOU JUST TELL US
WHERE EVERYBODY'S STUFF IS, HMM?
I DON'T KNOW WHA
YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT.
I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING!
WHAT'S THE WORD, DOUBLE-D?
[SNIFF SNIFF]
INCONCLUSIVE, EDDY.
ARRRGGH!
WELL, IF YOU WON'T TALK,
MAYBE YOUR FRIEND WILL!
YOU MUST BE THE BRAINS, HUH?
WHERE'S THE STUFF,
PLANKY? FESS UP!
OH SILENT, HUH?
AAAAAAGGGH!
SPLINTERS!
AAAH! LEAVE PLANK ALONE, EDDY!
[DING]
[SNIFF]
AS YOU CAN SEE,
THE BOARD IS LYING.
WELL, PLANKY?
I THINK IT'S TIME WE
TRIED OTHER METHODS.
THIS WILL MAKE
YOU SWELL UP GOOD.
AW! OHH
OHHH
[DRIP DRIP DRIP]
[MOANING]
[DRIP DRIP DRIP]
[DRIP DRIP DRIP DRIP]
AAAAAH!
OK! OK! I DID IT! I TOOK
EVERYONE'S STUFF!
NOW LET ME GO! I GOTTA
GO TO THE BATHROOM!
YOU HEARD HIM,
BOYS. CASE CLOSED.
AAH! OOH! EEE! AUGH!
AAH! OHH!
[JINGLES]
SO, BOYS,
WHAT'S BIG, ROUND,
COSTS A NICKEL
JAWBREAKERS! JAWBREAKERS!
NOW AWAY WE GO!
NOW JUST A ROTTEN MINUTE.
I FOUND MY DOLLY UNDER MY BED.
IT'S TRUE.
AND HERE SHE IS, SEE?
Edd: EXCUSE ME, EDDY,
AHEM, UPON FURTHER
INSPECTION OF MY PERSON,
I SEEM TO HAVE COME ACROSS
MY MAGNIFYING GLASS.
HELP!
HEH HEH THAT EDDY
THINKS HE'S SO SMART.
WE KNOW YOU DIDN'T DO IT, JONNY.
THANK YOU HANG TIGHT, JONNY.
THIS WON'T HURT A BIT.
SHOULD WE FEEL GUILTY
ABOUT JONNY'S PREDICAMENT?
NAH. YOU KNOW WHAT THEY SAY
A LITTLE CHILDHOOD
TRAUMA BUILDS CHARACTER.
OHH! AAH! WHOA!
COME ON! GET THE JAWBREAKERS!
Edd: NOT SO FAST, LITTLE FELLA.
I SAW THIS THING IN A MOVIE,
I MADE A THORAX.
ANTS CHECK,
MILLIPEDES, CHECK, MOTHS
YEAH. IT'S A BUG.
WELL, EDDY, THE TIME HAS ARRIVED
FOR MY MONTHLY
INSECT EXPEDITION.
A PAIR OF GALOSHES
AND STERILE GLOVES
TO AVOID BACTERIA AND GERMS.
OH, INSECTS BUG ME.
POUR VOU.
OK, READY!
CHECK!
[INFLATES]
[CRASH]
SO, LET US PROCEED
TO THE FOREST.
FOLLOW NATURE BOY.
ISN'T IT MAGNIFICENT?
ALL THE SPLENDORS OF NATURE,
DISPLAYED IN ONE GIAN
PETRI DISH FULL OF LIFE!
[GULP]
I THINK I SWALLOWED A BUG.
[CRACK] WHAT WAS THAT?
[OWL HOOTING]
THAT'S IT!
THIS NATURE STUFF'S
FOR THE BIRDS!
WHOAAAAAH!
EDDY? EDDY?
WHOA, WAY BIG!
IT'S A MASTERPIECE OF NATURE.
LOOKS LIKE MY
GRANDMOTHER'S HAIR NET.
WELL, LET'S GO, GUYS.
ED!
GET DOWN, YOU MANIAC!
YEE-HA! IT'S STICKY!
YOU'RE DISTURBING
THE ECO-ENVIRONMENT.
[LAUGHTER]
UH, WHAT WAS THAT?
NOW YOU'VE DONE
IT. ED, I SUGGEST
[LAUGHTER]
[GULP]
Voices: ED, EDD, AND EDDY,
SITTING IN A
TREE, K-I-S-S-I-N-G!
ED! GET OFF THAT THING!
HUH?
[LAUGHTER]
HELP ME, GUYS!
I DON'T WANT THE FLUIDS
DRAINED FROM MY BODY!
HOLD ON, ED!
WE'LL RESCUE YOU!
[GRUNTS]
ED, EDD, AND EDDY,
SITTING IN A TREE,
K-I-S-S-I-N-G!
[CRASH]
[LAUGHTER]
AAAAAAAH!
ED, EDD, AND EDDY,
SITTING IN A TREE,
K-I-S-S-I-N-G!
K-I-S-S-I-N-G!
AAAAAAAAH!
THERE'S A WAY OUT!
THROUGH THE TREES!
AAAAAAAAH!
[SPUTTERING]
HELP! QUICKSAND! HELP!
MY EYES!
[LAUGHTER]
AAH! AAH! AAH!
HEY, ED. SO HAPPY
YOU DROPPED IN.
HOPE YOU LIKE OUR DAD'S ROBES.
HUH?
HOW DID WE GET INTO THESE?
HUH!
EEEEYAAAAH!
[LAUGHING]
THIS IS NOT GOOD.
GO AHEAD, YELL. NO
ONE WILL HEAR YOU.
I'M MAY KANKER.
I'M MARIE KANKER.
AND I'M LEE KANKER.
WE'RE THE KANKER SISTERS.
WE JUST MOVED IN.
I'M EDDY.
I'M ED.
I'M WE KNOW, DOUBLE-D.
DON'T YOU WORRY ABOUT THAT.
UH, DO YOU GIRLS KNOW
WHERE OUR CLOTHES ARE?
THEY'RE DRYING OUTSIDE.
YOU BOYS SURE WERE DIRTY.
HUH?
WE'RE GONNA POP INTO
THE KITCHEN FOR A BIT, BOYS,
AND FIX UP SOME
HOME COOKING FOR YA.
WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK.
HEY! WAIT FOR ME!
THIS IS VERY STRANGE. LET'S GO.
HOLD IT, DOUBLE-D.
WHERE'S YOUR MANNERS?
THEY'RE NEW HERE.
AND THEY SAID THEY WERE
GONNA MAKE US SOME FOOD,
DIDN'T THEY?
SO, WHY DON'T WE JUS
HANG OUT FOR A BIT,
EAT FOR FREE, AND
THEN WE CAN SPLIT.
COME ON, LET'S
CHECK THIS PLACE OUT.
WHERE EXACTLY ARE WE?
LOOKS LIKE A POSTCARD I
SENT MY BROTHER ONCE.
AH, TV!
AW, IT'S A RERUN.
NICE SPACE HELMET.
TAKE ME TO YOUR PLUMBER.
NICE HEAD, ED.
GET IT? IT RHYMES!
"HEAD", "ED".
I CRACK ME UP.
HUBCAP DIGEST.
THIS BOOK HAS NO PRINT.
THESE PAGES ARE BLANK!
HA HA HA! LOOK! HA HA HA!
ARTWORK!
IT'S ED AND MAY! HOW CUTE!
Edd: IS THAT ME?
WHAT THE AAAAAAGH!
THAT'S NOT FUNNY!
Marie: OK, BOYS.
COME AND GET SOME NICE,
COLD, DELICIOUS POWDERED MILK.
Ed: THANKS. Edd:
THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
[COUGH COUGH]
Marie: HOW ABOUT A VIDEO?
FISHBOWL 2 A CLASSIC.
AH. AH. AH.
IT'S SO NICE TO
HAVE THE BOYS HOME.
DOING THE FISH STICKS!
THEN GIVE ME THE SQUEEZE-IT LOG!
GIRLS, SHUT UP!
WE GOT LUNCH TO MAKE.
THE WAY TO A MAN'S HEAR
IS THROUGH HIS ARTERIES.
AND A LITTLE KANKER
SECRET SAUCE
KETCHUP!
DINNER'S READY!
AHH
AHH THEY'RE SO DREAMY.
HA HA HA HA HA!
BE BACK IN A MINUTE, BOYS.
YEAH. WE'RE GONNA
GO AND FRESHEN UP.
AHH
[BURP]
HEE HEE HEE HEE.
WE'RE BACK!
NOTICE ANYTHING NEW, EDDY?
THE FINEST IN
PROCESSED PRODUCTS.
ONLY THE BEST FOR YOU.
HEY, HOW ABOUT A REFILL ON
THAT POWDERED MILK STUFF?
DO YOU LIKE OUR
KANKER BURGER, BIG ED?
IT'S GOOD. YEAH!
DON'T TALK WITH YOUR
MOUTH FULL, MISTER!
AAH!
PLEASE REFRAIN FROM
TOUCHING ME WHEN I'M EATING.
THANK YOU.
HMMP!
I'll TOUCH YOU WHENEVER
I WANT, BUDDY BOY!
IS THERE A PROBLEM?
EVERYTHING'S FINE!
HEY, MOVE IT! OUT OF THE WAY!
THIS IS THE BEST PART!
MOVE IT?
IT'S NOT GOOD ENOUGH
THAT WE'VE WORKED HARD
AND BROKEN OUR BACKS FOR YOU?
HUH?
IF THINGS DON'T CHANGE
AROUND HERE, WE'RE LEAVING!
IT'S TIME YOU GOOD-FOR-NOTHINGS
STARTED TO PULL OUR
OWN WEIGHT AROUND HERE!
WHAT'S UP WITH THEM?
CLEAN THIS MESS UP RIGHT NOW!
Lee: HEY! OVER HERE!
CLEAN THIS MESS!
HEY!
YOU CALL THAT CLEAN?
GET WASHING!
AND SCRUBBING!
COME ALONG, LITTLE MAN!
TIME TO CLEAN UP!
AAH!
HEH HEH HEH.
AND YOU!
MAKE IT SHINE!
ED, YOU'VE RUINED MY DISHES.
HEADING OUTSIDE, EDDY.
SLACKER.
THAT BETTER BE FIGHTING
OVER ME I HEAR IN THERE!
I'M GOING TO SANITIZE
THE LIVING AREA.
Eddy: OK.
I'll CLEAN THIS.
I'll CLEAN EVERYTHING!
SHINE IT UP NICE.
HEH HEH HEH.
Girls: HEY, MUD-TRACKER!
YOU'RE TRACKING MUD!
MUD?
UH-OH.
UHH!
YOU BETTER NO
WRECK DADDY'S BUCKET.
HANG THESE OUTSIDE.
OK, EDDY!
Lee: YOU SAILORS ARE ALL ALIKE.
[SILENCE]
YOU SHOULD GO BACK
TO DIVING FOR CLAMS.
THAT'S ENOUGH!
[WHIMPERING]
OK.
[WHIMPERING]
THIS IS THE THANKS WE
GET FOR OUR HARD WORK?
[CRYING]
UH-OH.
US GIRLS HAVE GOT TO
GET OURSELVES TOGETHER.
HAVEN'T YOU DONE
ENOUGH DAMAGE ALREADY?
NOW GET OUT OF HERE!
AND NEVER COME BACK!
WELL, YOU HEARD HER.
LET'S GO.
THIS HAS BEEN QUITE EDUCATIONAL.
HELLO, FREEDOM.
AAAAAAAGGGH!
JUST A MINUTE THERE
WHAT ABOUT EDDY JUNIOR?
HA HA HA!
AND ED JUNIOR?
DON'T FORGET DOUBLE-D JUNIOR!
AAAAH! AAAAH! AAAAH!
THAT'S IT!
RUN FOR IT!
AAAAAAAH!
THAT'S IT RUN, YOU COWARDS!
GET LOST!
AND DON'T TRIP ON
YOUR SHOELACES.
OH, LOOK AT THEM RUN.
JUST LIKE A REAL MAN.
I THINK I'M IN L-U-V, LOVE!
OHH OHH OHH
[LAUGHTER]
ED, EDD, AND EDDY!
YEAH!