Eva Lasting (2023) s01e01 Episode Script

1
[man] 1976 was the year
of the Olympic Games in Montreal.
That year, the Argentinian dictatorship
killed hundreds of students.
It's also the year when Rocky came out
with Sylvester Stallone.
In Colombia, the law
on personal consumption was passed
and we became the world's
number one producer of marijuana.
You could hear Fruko y sus Tesos
all over the radio
with their song "El Preso."
At that time, I was in high school
in my senior year.
[kids chatter]
[man] But most importantly,
1976 was the year when we met Eva.
It was our first time meeting a girl.
- [boy 1] Gosh.
- [boy 2] Oh, man, she's gorgeous.
[man] In the '70s,
there was a lot of sexual repression.
There were no mixed-gender high schools.
Education strategies
were focused on punishment.
Gender roles were clearly defined,
and being homosexual was a sin.
Those were definitely different times.
How about these tits, Arbeláez?
[boy] Wow.
Poor girl. They must weigh on her.
[boys laugh]
Guys, my mom said
that big boobs can ruin a girl's back.
Oh, because your mum's breasts
are really tiny.
Hey, listen.
I bet they did something to that photo.
- Really?
- Yeah.
And you, Pabón? What do you say?
- [boy 1] Oh, come on.
- [boy 2] Go ahead.
This guy's so uptight, seriously.
How come you're so embarrassed?
It's a magazine.
How do you think you'd feel
having a rack in front of you?
He's gonna be like, "Please, I can't!
Let me breathe!" [laughs]
- Let's see the rest.
- Attention, gentlemen.
Ready? Check out
the queen of this magazine.
- Show us.
- Check her out, suckers.
[boy sighs]
Incredible, baby. I just wanna do this.
[Eva] Hi.
[intriguing music plays]
That's the men's bathroom.
Well, too bad, because
there's no women's bathroom in here
and I really need to pee.
[intriguing music fades]
[liquid trickles]
Who the fuck is that?
Huh?
EVA LASTING
LYSISTRATA
EPISODE 1
[man] I was wondering if I had actually
seen that girl in the bathroom
or if it was just my imagination.
But, honestly, we were focusing
on something else for now.
In most classes,
teachers were not accustomed to having
relationships with their students.
However, I guess that might explain why
Professor Estela, our home room
and literature teacher,
was our erotic dream.
Márquez. All right.
And please write
As part of your final exam,
I'm gonna ask you to read a great book.
One Hundred Years of Solitude.
Huh? And write an essay which will
account for 30% of your final grade.
- And
- [Eva] Hello.
[upbeat music plays]
[Estela] Please, come in.
[upbeat music continues]
[Estela] Attention, boys.
Let me introduce you to Eva Samper.
The first female student
in José María Root High School.
I'm gonna ask you all to be very
respectful and available to assist her.
I'm confident these boys will make you
feel at home and part of our family.
[upbeat music continues]
[bell rings]
[upbeat music continues]
[boy] Did you see that? I can't believe
they let a girl study at our school.
What's up?
We didn't get to meet properly
in the bathroom.
Well, nice to meet all of you.
As you know, my name's Eva Samper.
But please don't call me by my last name.
I hate when people do that,
as if we were soldiers.
Samper, Angarita, Gómez, Otero.
Anyway, how about
you all tell me your names?
Nice to meet you. My name is Rodrigo.
Rodrigo.
Beautiful name.
And you?
Hi. Uh, my name is Álvaro.
And you guys?
- William.
- Édgar.
The Acuñas.
What's your name?
She's talking to you.
Uh, his name is Gustavo, and I'm Camilo.
Gustavo and Camilo.
And you?
- Salcedo.
- I mean your first name.
His name is Martín.
Martín.
I like it,
because you all look like a Rodrigo,
the Acuñas, an Álvaro,
a Martín, a Camilo, and a Gustavo.
It's so important
that your face matches your name.
Imagine that your name is Janet
and you look like a Martha. [chuckles]
You'd be quite mad, right?
Uh [chuckles] Definitely.
You haven't read The Importance
of Being Earnest by Oscar Wilde?
[funky music plays]
I mean, reading literature
is better than looking at porno.
[bell rings]
[Eva] Anyone sitting here?
Uh, Benítez.
Um, I mean, Julián.
But his dad was transferred
to Barranquilla, so he left the school.
- So it's okay if I sit here?
- Yeah.
[adult Camilo] That trigonometry class
felt like an eternity.
I held my breath and didn't blink
the entire time.
I didn't look at her either.
But in that moment, I felt I was falling
in love for the first time in my life.
JOSÉ MARÍA ROOT DISTRICT SCHOOL
[upbeat music plays]
Where is everyone?
- They took off?
- Uh, yeah, they all went home.
Oh. And you?
Oh, I live nearby,
so I just walk to my house.
Hm. By the main road?
Uh-huh. More or less.
Oh, super.
My bus stops there, so I'll accompany you.
Is that cool?
Yeah. Yeah, sure.
Why so quiet today?
- Uh
- I mean, we're classmates.
We probably should be talking.
I know I'm not wrong.
Do you hate me?
If you hate me, I can change my seat.
[Camilo] It's not like that.
You're fine. Okay?
[Eva] Oh, so you like me?
Yes.
Such a liar.
[laughs] If true,
you would've talked to me. But it's fine.
I'm sure we'll be very good friends
with time,
because I always get along
with the Camilos.
- And my intuition never fails.
- [Camilo] Sure.
And what's more, I know it's weird having
a girl next to you as your desk buddy.
The world is changing. For women.
No, no. For everyone.
But especially for women.
Have you heard of feminists?
I'm a feminist.
But don't worry. I'll explain it.
Or, for example, Isabel Martínez Perón,
the first woman president of Argentina
or any other major country
in Latin America.
Another sign that
the times are changing, right?
Yes. Yes, for sure.
- Uh, this is my place.
- [Eva] Hm.
- It's a very nice house.
- [Camilo] Thanks.
- Well, let's go. I can walk you.
- No, no, no, that's not necessary.
Are you sure?
You know the way?
No, but I'll figure it out.
Really? Because it could be
Don't tell me you're one of those guys
who thinks that, as women,
we need your help to do everything.
Even to find a bus stop.
No. It's It's a courtesy thing.
Or machismo.
Mrs. Ana.
Mrs. Ana, come here.
- Come see this.
- [Ana] What is it?
Look, but don't be too obvious.
I wonder who she is.
- A girlfriend maybe?
- Girlfriend? But from where?
Hm.
"Courtesy" comes from the word "court."
It was the custom in the days of the kings
when women could be erased
for practically nothing.
Meaning, if we didn't do
what was expected of us,
we could get our heads cut off.
- Really? Are you serious?
- [Eva] Yes, really.
That's what happened when Anne Boleyn
wouldn't agree to a divorce
with King Henry VIII.
What? Didn't you read that play?
[jaunty silent movie music plays]
[inaudible speech]
[jaunty music continues]
[jaunty music ends]
- [Camilo sighs]
- [Camilo's dad] Hm.
- Mm-hm.
- [Camilo chuckles]
Hm. Camilo.
Do you have something to tell us?
Tell you about what?
Hm. Well, I don't know, son, but I saw you
arrive with someone new today.
Very pretty too.
Oh, yes. Eva.
- Eva? Her name's Eva?
- Yes.
She's a girl who started school today.
- Wait.
- What do you mean?
Yes, starting today,
José María will be admitting ladies.
- Starting today? Why hadn't you told us?
- Mixing boys and girls?
- Yes.
- [Ana] Why hadn't you told us?
- I didn't know about it.
- All good manners will surely be lost.
- A letter.
- [Dad] Respect too.
What do you mean? It's better though.
These kids should learn
how to relate to women now.
- Why didn't you let the girl in?
- Yes, why didn't you bring her in?
She was in a hurry.
She had to get on Bus 30.
- And why didn't you go with her?
- She didn't want me to.
Wait, what?
What is this lack of courtesy, Camilo?
Papa, courtesy comes
from the times of kings.
Times when women were treated
as if they meant nothing,
and if women didn't obey,
they would cut their heads off.
Haven't you read the story of Anne Boleyn?
Love me because you've made me see ♪
Another way to love ♪
And love this way ♪
Tastes differently ♪
Love me ♪
I thank destiny ♪
For putting me in your way ♪
[Ana] What's going on?
Don't you hear? Come here.
Do you Do you hear?
Do you know what that is? He's in love.
Don't you hear him
singing romantic ballads?
That means he's finally in love.
Now, today, tomorrow and forever ♪
Oh, my boy. How sweet.
Yes. Although I must confess one thing.
I'm not too sure that girl Eva
is the most appropriate.
How about that story
about courtesy and kings? No.
In fact, I bet you
that girl Eva is a feminist.
Trust me, I know what I'm saying.
[Ana] Mm.
Mom, I don't have time for breakfast.
- What are you doing with that hairstyle?
- I wanted to change it.
He doesn't say why his hair is like that?
I liked the way he had it before.
Are we going to let him go like that?
Sh. Let me listen.
[man on radio] Tanks
and troops from the army.
Soldiers in tactical gear took control
of the capital city's downtown district.
[Estela] In other words,
as part of this so-called boom
of Latin American literature,
besides Colombian author
Gabriel García Márquez,
let's also mention other authors
who had a major impact.
For example, an author from Peru
named Mario Vargas Llosa.
There were also two Mexican authors,
Carlos Fuentes and Octavio Paz,
and an Argentinian author,
and an amazing writer,
whose name is Julio Cortázar.
Now, boys, please pay attention,
as I need you all
to pick a technical course,
and that's for our entire semester.
You know you can choose
between two options.
A, engineering. And B, accounting.
So when I say your name, you need
to tell me which class you'd prefer.
Okay? Acosta, Sergio
Yes, go ahead, Miss Samper?
Um, my name is not Miss Samper.
I prefer to be called Eva.
There isn't any knitting?
[suspenseful music plays]
Did you not look at yourselves
in the mirror before leaving home?
- You look crazy with those hairdos.
- Crazy?
What's wrong with you?
Are you guys just losing it or what?
The last thing we need now
is to end up in knitting class or ballet.
I don't recommend ballet.
No, really.
It's hard. From my own experience. I took
classes from age five until I was ten.
You feel me, boys?
Uh, for me,
I couldn't care less about electives.
What I really wanna do
is the least amount of effort,
and accounting or electric classes
seem really difficult.
Sounds super difficult.
Instead, knitting is a break.
Piece of cake.
I'm also speaking
from personal experience.
I think it could even be
better than soccer.
[rock music plays]
[adult Camilo] That morning,
we were all competing
to show off our skills in front of Eva.
- Hey, there!
- [boy 1] Come on!
[boy 2] Keep going. Keep going.
[adult Camilo] We were in the came class.
Class 10B.
And my best friends in the class
were Rodrigo Arbeláez,
a smart young man,
whose father was a musician
and an alcoholic
that treated his family
in all sorts of terrible ways.
[Rodrigo's dad] Now what?
Where do you want me to go?
[adult Camilo] Gustavo Pabón,
a handsome fellow, who was extremely shy,
so he didn't talk much.
His father had just come out of prison,
where he had been serving time for a crime
he kept claiming he hadn't committed.
Álvaro Castro,
who was mesmerizing when he played.
The best of us.
But he was pessimistic deep down inside.
He was the son of a house cleaning lady,
who would also do some laundry and ironing
so that her family could make ends meet.
Martín Salcedo.
The class bully.
He was a rude and aggressive guy,
whose mother worked as a waitress
in a cheap local restaurant.
Here you go.
Yes, I'll be right back.
Hello.
[adult Camilo] And then there was me,
Camilo Granados.
Considering my poor soccer skills, I was
hoping to become a sports journalist.
My father was a taxi driver
who was proud of being his own boss
and not having to be supervised by anyone.
[engine stalls]
Come on!
[adult Camilo] And there was my mother.
A woman who contributed
to the family budget
by drafting college papers
on a typewriter.
[boy] Hey, hurry! Get that ball!
[adult Camilo] And there was Octavio
Quiñones, the terror of our school.
A violent troublemaker.
We didn't know much about him.
We just knew most of the school
was afraid of that guy.
I was afraid of him too.
[rock music plays]
[boy 1] Go around. Chase.
This guy is easy.
- [boy 2] Where are you going?
- [boy 3] Over here!
- [boy 4] Ooh!
- [Quiñones] Hey, you got a problem?
Why'd you foul?
You gonna play the game, asshole?
Are you his babysitter now?
No, no. You just gonna do that to me?
Don't be an asshole.
What are you gonna do?
- So what, call it. Call it.
- See you after school tomorrow.
- Well
- Sure. It's on.
It's on.
[adult Camilo] A fight after school.
That was the worst thing
that could ever happen to me,
because I gotta admit, back then,
I was prone to being
what a teenage boy should never be.
I was a coward.
[man] Play!
[Salcedo] There's this movie,
and the director,
he likes schoolgirls a lot, you know?
He always shows them
with socks up to here.
The mini skirts are amazing.
He makes them do a little "ooh la la,"
you know? Starts to kiss them.
What's up? Where are you guys going?
- To the movies.
- And I'm not invited?
No, I don't think you'll like
the movie we're going to watch.
- Why?
- The Schoolgirls' Sin at the Imperio.
I saw it.
[upbeat music plays]
- Was it good?
- [Eva] No.
It's really bad.
It's just porn. There's zero plot.
So at Metro Rivera, they're showing
that movie Saturday Night Fever
with a new actor, John Travolta.
They say he's an awesome dancer.
A dance movie? For real? [laughs]
[Eva] Yes.
Okay? It's on me.
[upbeat music continues]
IMPERIO THEATER XXX
[adult Camilo] Given the situation I was
in, I was willing to admit I was a coward,
and seek help and protection from Salcedo,
who was as much a bully as Quiñones.
That's why I ended up being the only one
to turn down Eva's invitation,
so I could go to the Imperio
in order to show some fake solidarity
to the person I thought
was the only one who could save me.
Quiñones was pretty cocky, huh?
Oh, don't fall for it.
That dog barks, but won't bite.
Really?
Yes, I'm tired
of having to teach that fool.
Oh. I'm happy you say that,
because I was thinking
Quiñones is not our problem
at all, Granados.
You know what our problem is?
That girl Eva.
- Eva?
- Yes. That chick wants to mess with us.
She wants to split us up.
Are you serious, man? You think so? But
If it wasn't like that,
we'd all be here, no?
[tense music plays]
[tense music fades]
- Going back to the subject of Quiñones
- There's no plot to this movie.
Yeah.
[adult Camilo] After the movies,
my buddies and I enjoyed playing pool
at the Club 68.
It was located down the street,
and, for us,
this place was like our headquarters.
There they are.
- How's it going?
- What's up?
Hm. How was it?
Did you like the movie?
- Well
- It was good. And you?
Just chilling. Teaching your guys
about the pleasures of life.
[Quiñones] Granados!
[rock music plays]
I was right. I guessed
we might run into that jerk playing here.
What's going on, Quiñones?
Calm down, Salcedo.
You got nothing to do with this.
- Just me and that dumbass.
- What?
I got an idea, man.
Wouldn't it be better if you and I
had our conversation sooner than later?
Because, as my mom always says,
don't put off until tomorrow
what you can do today.
Ain't that right?
- Yeah?
- [Quiñones] Let's do this!
- Go ahead.
- [Camilo] Let's do it.
[Eva] What's the matter with you?
Hm?
Do you have so many problems at home
that you're looking for a fight anywhere?
- Don't tell me you're a Jim Stark.
- Who's that?
A Jim Stark. The main character
in Rebel Without a Cause.
You guys haven't seen that?
No?
I'll catch you up. It's about a guy
who has issues with his parents
and is always getting into trouble.
His soul is so poisoned
that one day, he ends up feeling guilty
for murdering one of his friends.
Something that could've
happened to anybody.
Especially you.
You should go get your shit together
before you really screw up.
[scoffs]
Think about it. You'll be better off.
[funky music plays]
[Camilo] What?
[funky music continues]
[Eva] So?
What did you think, hm?
Good books and good movies
always help us with solving our problems.
Haven't you read Lysistrata?
- Not that one either.
- [Eva] No?
- Uh, Lysis-what?
- [Eva] Lysistrata.
It's a Greek comedy where women,
by crossing their legs, avoid a war.
[jaunty silent movie music plays]
That's not how men solve their problems.
Now, Quiñones must be thinking
that we're hiding behind the cheap stories
of a dumb little girl
in order to avoid him.
We'll talk later
about the "dumb little girl,"
but what a drag to fight now.
We're having a good time.
But the guy messed with Granados.
Relax. Relax, man.
I'll get that asshole back later.
He won't laugh at me.
I've been wanting to do that for a while.
[rock music plays]
Really? For everybody?
Pabón, who's going to pay?
No, no, no, no. Guys, don't worry.
It's on me today.
- Really?
- Yes, it's no problem.
Thanks.
All right.
As I was saying before we got interrupted,
I can't believe all you do all day
is get bored in class,
play soccer,
fight, go to that dump
to watch pornography.
Hm?
I mean, life is way more than that, guys.
Yes? So then like what?
[upbeat rock and roll music plays]
[adult Camilo] Eva attempted to introduce
us to the alleged pleasure of smoking,
and even though we tried,
none of us actually liked it.
And I think that's what saved us
from becoming compulsive smokers.
Let me ask you.
- Does anyone here have a girlfriend?
- Who said we're interested in that?
Man, let her talk.
In that movie we just watched, how does
Travolta end up seducing that girl?
Was it playing soccer?
Maybe fighting? Staring at porn?
No.
She was attracted by his dancing.
Can you guys dance?
One, two, three, four. Turn around.
Three, four.
Two, three,
four, turn, and one, two.
That's right. Good job.
And one, two, three, four. That's it.
Now did you really miss me? ♪
I guess ♪
Now. One, two, three.
Two. Good job.
Well, lay back and relax ♪
While I put away the dishes ♪
You can ring my bell ♪
Ring my bell ♪
You can ring my bell ♪
[Eva] There you go.
Ring my bell ♪
You got no girlfriend, you can't dance,
so I bet you guys can't kiss either.
[upbeat music plays]
[adult Camilo] And this is how
each one of us got his turn.
And from Eva's lips,
one by one, for the very first time,
we each gave her a piece of our innocence.
That afternoon, we all fell in love,
despite the fact that she couldn't resist
the temptation of doing her evaluation.
[upbeat music continues]
You guys need a lot more practice.
Congratulations, Martín.
You're the only one who can kiss.
[upbeat music continues]
[Eva] Can we head towards uptown?
- [Eva] What's up?
- What's up? What are you doing here?
I came to pick you up
so we could walk to school together.
- Uh
- Did you hear what happened in Argentina?
No. No, what happened?
A military coup
ousted Isabel Martínez de Perón.
Don't you find that sad?
Uh, yes. Yes. Very sad. What a shame.
I also heard that they killed
600 Black students in South Africa.
Clearly looks like
times are not changing after all.
Violent people still doing their shitshow.
Yes.
[Eva] Oh, one more thing about yesterday.
I know that I said Salcedo was
my favorite kiss, but that was not true.
I said that to make him feel bad
for having called me a dumb little girl.
Yes.
The truth is,
the only kiss I enjoyed was yours.
It was special.
- Uh-huh.
- Come on, let's go,
I don't wanna miss our class
with Miss Estela.
[romantic music plays]
All right, listen, boys.
According to a new decision
from the Department of Education,
we will be having
more girls join our school. [laughs]
And our principal thought
that it would be a great idea
to offer a technical course for girls.
So, Eva,
the great news is there will be
a knitting class for you from now on.
But, uh, what do you mean?
Will it be just me?
Like you guys are gonna
let me be alone in that class?
[Salcedo] Oh my God.
[Estela] Good point. Let's see.
Anyone of you gentlemen
interested in the knitting class perhaps?
Are you serious, Professor? [laughs]
[funky music plays]
I'm not surprised, you idiot.
[funky music continues]
Pabón.
[Estela] Arbeláez, Pabón.
Castro.
[bell rings]
[funky music continues]
- We have to talk about what just happened.
- What's up, brother?
- Salcedo, dude.
- [Salcedo] Go on.
I still can't believe it.
And for real, I don't know if I can
continue being friends with you all.
I'm the one taking it. I'm the one.
You're exaggerating. Man, Eva's right.
I was fed up
with the accounting homework too.
[Álvaro] I have to think about it still.
What if knitting
is harder than electricity?
- [Camilo] Nah.
- [Álvaro] That could happen.
I do think
we should try new things, honestly.
Yes, but you're not aware of the danger
you're all getting yourselves into.
To begin, they start calling us
by our first name.
Then, our hairstyles change.
Then, we take knitting classes.
Oh, do you know where this ends?
Plus I think that chick
is hiding something.
You can't deny she's weird.
That she's different from other women.
What, you know so many women, right?
No. But even if you don't want
to admit it, that chick has some secrets.
You'll mark my words.
You know what? Think whatever you want.
I have to go. I'll see you Monday!
What's wrong with him?
What's going on, moron?
[rock music plays]
Hey, hey, where are you going, man?
Wait. Relax, dude.
Think a lame story from your girlfriend
was gonna get you out of trouble?
Camilo! Camilo. Camilo, come on, get in.
[adult Camilo] Running away
might have been an option,
but I didn't want to embarrass myself
and look like a coward in front of Eva,
and that made me braver than ever.
Camilo! Camilo.
[adult Camilo] Now that I had survived
the turbulence of her kiss,
I could definitely survive
some punching and fighting.
[Eva] Camilo! Camilo!
Hey, no! Camilo, stop! Get off.
All right, all right, calm down.
Camilo, stop it. That's enough.
No more fighting. I said stop.
Enough, guys. Enough.
No! Stop it! Are you out of your mind?
[adult Camilo] If it's true
that when you're in love,
you feel as if nothing is impossible
and you can handle anything
[chuckles] then I was crazy in love.
Desperately in love.
All right, stop fighting!
Calm down. Enough with this!
You shouldn't have got into that fight.
You obviously
[adult Camilo] However,
my assumptions were wrong
since I hadn't
taken into account one element.
A key element. Eva.
Were you just not paying attention?
But I had to defend myself.
Don't you realize that I hate violence,
that I hate violent people,
and I think all the mess in the world
is caused by violent people?
- But
- [Eva] You've got no excuse!
No excuse, Camilo.
I'm disappointed. I really believed
you were a different person.
Eva!
- Ow, Ma! Be gentle.
- [Ana] Hand. Hand.
- [Camilo groans]
- Getting into a fight? What are you doing?
You go to school to study and learn.
Not to fight with your friends.
- You'll wake up with a black eye.
- Mm-hm.
- What is this?
- Don't make a fuss, Mrs. Ana. It's normal.
If a kid doesn't exchange punches
with others at school,
that's the first step
towards becoming a fruitcake.
Ugh, that's horrible.
What are you raising, a chimpanzee?
Violence is nothing
but a sign of barbarism.
- [Camilo's dad laughs]
- Yes, barbarism. Don't you laugh.
Plus, having different tastes and
preferences, what's the problem with that?
I mean, look at the Greeks
in the old times.
They were all bisexual.
That is they liked it like that.
And they created
the best culture in the Western world. Hm?
I'm reading about it in a manuscript
that I'm checking. Look, that's how it is.
Be very careful what you read, Mrs. Ana,
because it's making you lose focus.
Perhaps it's helping me find it in fact.
Let's see.
[adult Camilo] Love helped me get over the
one thing I thought I'd never overcome.
Being a coward.
But I paid a high price for it.
I disappointed Eva.
The weekend had arrived, meaning
I wouldn't get to see her until Monday.
In that movie we just watched, how does
Travolta end up seducing that girl?
She was attracted by his dancing.
[adult Camilo] I had to do
something desperate,
otherwise I would go crazy
torturing myself, overthinking everything.
Wait, are they serious?
[Ana] Yes. Camilo brought it from school.
What the heck? Knitting needles?
Special one for crochet?
And yarn? Knitting? How come?
Did our son just sign up for knitting?
- And?
- [Dad] You're okay with that?
That's so pathetic.
Don't you think so, Mrs. Ana?
- I don't really think so.
- How come you don't think so?
This is a girls' vocational class.
It's not for boys, clearly.
All right, all right.
Knitting teaches patience.
It teaches concentration.
Two very important things
for both men and women equally.
Did you pick that up at work or what?
No. The nuns I studied with in school
taught me that.
Oh, yeah ♪
[disco music plays]
Summer ♪
Madness ♪
Summer ♪
Madness ♪
[horn blows]
Come on, get up.
We're going to the stadium.
- No, Dad, I don't wanna watch soccer.
- You gotta be kidding. Today's the derby.
- Come on, get out of here. Let's go.
- I don't wanna go. I don't feel well.
That makes no sense.
You've stayed in bed since Friday.
- Staying in bed will make you feel worse.
- No, stop.
[Camilo's dad] I'm not asking you
for a favor.
This is an order. Get in the shower,
put on your jersey. I'll be waiting.
- I don't have the jersey.
- Don't fuck with me.
José, why are you talking to him
like that?
- Let him sleep. It's Sunday.
- He sings ballads in the shower.
He combs his hair like a weirdo, signs up
for knitting, dances like a fruitcake,
doesn't wanna watch soccer?
No way. I'll make sure he becomes a man.
A real one. He needs some direction.
Mom, what a drag. You too? [groans]
[adult Camilo] My dad was sure
I was having issues
figuring out my sexual preferences,
and that he needed to fix this
immediately, once and for all.
Dad? Isn't the stadium straight ahead?
We're not going to the stadium.
No? Where are we going?
Kid, I'm taking you
on the most important date of your life.
[funky music plays]
Of course. It shouldn't be a problem.
Just take care of him.
Hello.
No. Sit, please.
If he needs any more time,
just let me know.
[woman] Have you ever been with a woman?
No. No, ma'am.
[woman laughs]
[woman] Well, relax. I won't bite.
[adult Camilo] For the first time,
I was facing a naked body.
And more than anything,
I wanted to touch it.
[woman] You like it?
[adult Camilo] She found
that situation funny.
But she was very sweet
and patient with me,
and she let me do everything.
Even ask her questions.
Uh, one question.
Do Do women like for us to smell nice?
Yes.
And for us to know how to kiss, and smoke,
and fight, and all those things?
[commentator] He has backup,
but he doesn't need it.
He's gotta take his chance.
He just kicked it. Goal!
Goal! Goal, you motherfuckers! Goal!
[men cheer]
[man] I told you. I told you.
Let's go.
[men shout]
[adult Camilo] I ended up deciding
I didn't want my first time
to be with a woman I knew nothing about.
Other than that she had been paid
to do this with me.
Despite what was going on,
I kept thinking only about Eva.
Someone ended up quite unhappy
about this whole thing. That was my dad.
Why didn't you want to be with Brigitte?
- What happened. You didn't get a boner?
- No, Dad!
Then what?
Well I don't know how to tell you.
I'm listening. Go ahead.
I
I think I'm in love.
[funky music plays]
[adult Camilo] The following Monday,
we had our first knitting class.
To everyone's surprise,
we were a group of 40 students in there.
There were even students
from other grades.
And even Quiñones.
[teacher] With a thin yarn like this,
we can make it nice and elegant.
[funky music continues]
That's terrible, Miss Samper.
Ugh, look at that horrible mess you made.
It's all tangled.
Professor, I'm sorry,
my name's not Miss Samper.
My name is Eva, and the problem is
I don't know how to do this.
[teacher] Well, aren't you embarrassed
in front of your male classmates?
You happen to be the only girl in class
and the only one who can't knit right!
No, Professor,
I'm not embarrassed at all, honestly.
You should be embarrassed
because you can't teach us.
[rock music plays]
Settle down, Miss Samper.
Please, be respect
My name is Eva. And respect
is something one shall earn, not request.
But has Eva talked to any of you?
No. Not with me.
Not to me either.
I would like to know
if we're together or not.
Because of what happened at the club?
Well, honestly, I don't think she'd go out
with the five of us at the same time.
So then?
[sighs] I don't know.
I don't know. I don't know.
You're so dumb, guys. You're basically
drooling over a whore now.
I guess the mystery of Eva is solved.
I bet she puts out. That's what whores do,
kissing five guys at the same time.
It just takes four of them
to be as dumb as you guys.
[laughs] Didn't I warn you all about her?
Yes or no?
That's what is weird about that girl.
You're so dumb. You're all basically
drooling over a stupid whore.
[toilet flushes]
[rock music plays]
[adult Camilo] We were all on the edge
of our seats, waiting for Eva's reaction.
Was she going to accept that?
Was she going to deny it?
Was this the premature end
of our platonic love story with her?
[rock music continues]