Happy Town s01e01 Episode Script
In This Home on Ice
Nice girls, not one with a defect, cellophane shrink-wrapped, so correct.
Red dogs under illegal legs.
She looks so good Maybe one of these days you'll actually be able to drop me off in front of my house.
She is watching the detectives.
"Ooh, he's so cute!" Night.
She is watching the detectives when they shoot, shoot, shoot, shoot.
Help! Someone out there, help! I don't know I don't know what you're talking about! I don't know! You've gotta be kidding me, dude.
Aah! I don't know what you're talking about, man! You got the wrong guy! I don't know what you're talking about! Okay, okay, okay! Okay! I'll tell you what you need to know.
Just get that gun out of my face, okay? Okay.
Okay, okay, okay.
I'll tell you what you want.
Just get the gun out of my face.
Are we good? Uh, I figured you'd let me go, you know? Let the proper authorities do to me what they have to, you know? Court, prison, and may Oh, come on! I told you what you want to know! I told you what you want to hear! Wait! I told you what you needed to know! Oh, please! I told you what you needed to know! Find your baggage on the platform.
- It's Henley, isn't it? - Yeah.
Hi.
- I'm Miranda Kirby.
Oh! What fun.
- Thank you so much for getting me.
Full-service Realtor.
That's what they call me.
Welcome to Haplin.
You're gonna love it here.
- Do you play the guitar? - I do, yeah.
Oh! I have always wanted to play.
- You know, I took lessons when I was about 9 - Thank you.
But I didn't like my teacher 'cause he smelled.
So I asked my parents if I could quit, and they let me! I have half a mind to sue them now, honest.
Can you imagine if they didn't make me quit? I'd be flippin' Eric Clapton today.
My Jordan she's 8.
She's gonna start playing in the summer.
And if she wants to quit, it's like, - Sorry, partner! No can doofus! Get in! - Right, okay.
So why have you chosen Haplin, hon? Aside from wanting to display impeccable geographic taste.
- Uh, well, my mother vacationed here as a child.
- Okay.
Yeah.
She recently passed away, - but she always spoke so fondly of this place.
- Oh.
Do doodly do! - Do do doodly do, ah! - Your dad's singing his "do do" song, and that can only mean one thing.
That's right "Dallas Alice" goes back in the lake today.
- It gets earlier every year.
- No, that's not true.
The week of the thaw fest is when we always put her back in.
It's gonna be a chilly thaw fest this year.
- Doesn't seem like it's warming up anytime soon.
- Mm, mm, mm.
- Oh, did you look at those brochures? - Uh, no.
Emma C.
, mommy wants to leave Haplin and move to California.
What say you? I say no.
- Yeah? - Yeah.
- Why not? - They have earthcakes there.
They do have earthcakes there.
And here we are, in the cradle of the Heartland.
Daddy's the son of the sheriff in a town with no crime.
Mommy has an important job at the bread factory, and daughter Emma is the brightest bulb in her first grade class.
Eat 'em.
Mommy and daddy still sneak off for smoochy-smooch, despite the fact that they've been together since prom.
So tell me, Emma.
Why would we trade any of that - to go to a place full of earthcakes? - We wouldn't.
No, we wouldn't.
Tell her, Emma C.
Tell mommy the glories of Haplin, hmm? What do you plan to do? I want to open a candle shop with my inheritance.
- What do you think? - I think that's amazing.
I adore candles, - especially the scented ones.
- Oh, you'll love my, uh, - strawberry fields glow-ever candle.
- Oh, yeah? Mm-hmm.
I use sweet, sun-ripened strawberries - in the wax - Oh! - And then hand-grubby the top with banana slice wicks.
- Ooh! - The aroma is amazing.
- Okay.
Put me down for five.
Um, speaking of aroma, everything smells so good here.
Well, of course it does, sweetie.
Look.
That's the bread factory "Our Daily" baking and confectioner.
The locals call it "The Bready.
" Not only does it employ 12% of Haplin's residents, it also makes Haplin a place where the air is alive with the aroma of fresh baking bread all the live-long day.
Don't you ever ask them why, if they told you, you would cry, so just look at them and sigh, and know they love you.
Welcome to Haplin, or as some folks like to call it Happy Town.
Because they know, Henley.
They know.
I think it's too cold.
Well, now that's where you're wrong.
Yeah, it's too cold, but if you think on it, wish on it, visualize the "Dallas Alice" on lake spears, huh? - Are you seeing it? - No.
No? Huh? Are you are you seeing the string with the trout - and the sauger and the walleye dangling from it, huh? - No.
- No? Are you visualizing anything? - Grilled cheese! Grilled cheese? What? Mwah.
Okay.
I'll prove to you that it works.
Right now I am envisioning your babysitter Georgia, who's come to walk you to school.
Ohm Oh, my God! It works.
I can't believe it! It works! It works! - What are you guys doing? - Daddy's being dumb.
Daddies do that.
Are you really putting her in the water today? - Yeah.
- The pond is frozen over.
I was by there last night.
Well, the pond isn't the lake, and what were you doing by the pond last night, Georgia? Saved by the belly.
Hey there, little bean! - Grandpa! - Oh! That's my girl.
Oh, look at you.
Georgia, how's your father? Sleeping one off.
- Ain't that much sleep in creation.
- Truth.
We got a situation at the square.
- Want to ride along? - It's my day off, pops.
I'm putting the "Dallas Alice" back in the water today.
It's too damn early in the season - to put her back in the water.
- Was there some sort of meeting? What, you guys got together this morning - to talk about the weather? - Come on, let's go.
- Let me get my khakis.
- No, you're fine just like you are.
- See you later, huh, little bean? Georgia.
- Tell mommy I had to leave 'cause my daddy is meaner than your daddy.
Mmm! Come on.
Let's go.
You drive.
- Bye, guys.
- Come on.
Technically, it is not a date.
I never framed it as a date.
The minute you ask a girl out, Big Dave, it's a date.
I asked her out for omelets.
White wine and omelets.
This is Big Dave's, and this is Big Dave.
Hi! Good morning.
This is Henley.
Henley, this is Big Dave.
- Hi.
- Hi.
- And this is Eli Rogers.
- Hey.
They call him "Root Beer.
" It's a small town.
Everyone gets a nickname.
Nice to meet you guys.
Ah, yeah.
Welcome.
Yeah.
Definitely.
Um, why don't you ladies take a booth, and I will bring you over a cup of coffee? - Okay.
- Great.
Bye.
Are you thinking what I'm thinking? White wine and omelets? Yeah.
Yeah.
Okay.
Yeah, I'm on it.
I'm on it.
I gotta go.
Trouble in the square banner trouble.
Ohh.
Again? Lay off that horn! You, in the car.
Would you lay off the horn? Settle down.
- Everybody, settle down.
- Why don't you use a little more bass in your voice, Root Beer? - Say it like a man.
It'll be more effective.
- Yeah! Yeah! Whoa.
Look at this A fracas.
An imbroglio a mob scene in downtown Haplin.
That's a rare occurrence, John.
Well, these men seem to have a problem with us raising our banner.
I thought we agreed that it wasn't to be hoisted.
- No, we agreed to nothing of the sort.
- Yeah, sure we did.
We sat at that city council meeting, and the talk was of healing, of not dwelling in the past, and we agreed then and there this wasn't to be hoisted.
Which I would imagine would be very easy if your own flesh and blood was not pictured up on that banner.
So as long as they remain missing, - then there's still hope I guess, right? - No doubt.
I-I'm not trying to be insensitive As long as you refuse to hunt for the "Magic Man", then he'll just remain at large.
Providing there really was a "Magic Man".
Providing there's not some other explanation.
What then? They all just skipped town, huh? - My 8-year-old daughter did not just skip town.
- I know that.
- Maybe you'd like to take this up with my mother.
- Maybe I would.
That's it! Hey! - Jeez! All right! - Get him away! - Enough! That is enough! - Damn it.
The banner goes away.
Thaw fest is about corn dogs and carousels.
It ain't about darkness.
Hey, Sheriff.
Hobbs has got something serious out at Mac's pond.
The banner goes away! How's your jaw? It's fine.
You need to start acting like a cop, Tommy.
How do you figure? You're standing there with your hands in your back pockets instead of blading them properly.
Command presence.
You act like you're selling ice cream.
This is Haplin, pop.
Why make things difficult when life is offering you this? Just remember the inevitability of the vis major.
The what? The vis major.
It's a Latin term.
It means the natural and unavoidable catastrophe that interrupts the natural course of events.
And, son, every life can expect a visit from the vis major.
Well, I figure the trick is to avoid the major vis or the vis major or whatever the hell it is - for as long as possible.
- That is the trick.
I'd tell that to Chloe if ever I saw her again.
- Who? - What? Who's Chloe? Who? What you got, Hobbs? Kids were skatin' when they found him.
You're not gonna believe this.
Know what that is, Tommy? Yep.
The vis major.
Okay.
I really think you're gonna be very comfortable here till we can find you something a little more permanent, huh? Yeah, sounds good.
I have seven boarders at this time, Henley, including you and me.
Now here is the TV room, and the only rule here is "the first to arrive gets to drive".
Breakfast and lunch are come-as-you-may.
And these are my widows Esther, Joanie, Rose and Irene.
- This is Henley.
- Hello.
Well, look at you! Cuter than a mouse's pocketbook! I looked like that when I was her age.
- No, you didn't.
- I have the photo.
They didn't have cameras in the 1400s.
Everybody says there's no homier place than Dot Meadows' place.
Mr.
Grieves? Mrs.
Meadows.
Will you be joining us for dinner? We're serving lamb, mint-rubbed.
Regrettably no, Mrs.
Meadows.
My stomach is a little sour.
Has been all day.
Oh, dear.
I'll send Colleen up with some bicarbonate of soda.
How kind.
Mr.
Grieves moved here three months ago.
He's opening a shop in town movie memorabilia.
The third floor is strictly off-limits.
Failure to adhere to these rules will result in the immediate termination of your stay here.
I'm not joking.
Your room is this way.
We have a late-model red pickup overturned Okay, everybody.
By now you've all heard.
And while I know this is something we haven't had to deal with in a while for most of you, never at all we will get this taken care of so long as we keep our powder dry.
Now the brutal specificity of the murder should be kept quiet so as to help in the investigation.
We gotta get this guy, quick.
This is not a well man.
A well man does not put a hole in another man's head.
Okay, people.
You heard the man.
Let's get out there.
I want you to canvass all the houses around Mac's pond, and I want you to find anybody who might have seen the victim in the hours before he died, all right? Let's get on it.
Sheriff, State Police Barracks - are sending a car over for the body.
- They're not even gonna give us 11 seconds with it? Captain Frost's orders, Detective Hobbs.
And it sounded like they're sending a man out.
For what? To assist us, I'm sure.
"Assist," which quickly turns "monitor", and before you know it, it's "supervise".
And Peggy Haplin office left six messages before the great lady called herself.
Oh, yeah? How'd she sound? Well, like she'd been eatin' hornets for breakfast.
Root Beer.
Tommy.
Notify Mrs.
Friddle.
Line one.
So here we see the containers where the water, flour, salt, fat and yeast are all mixed.
The mix is then placed into the kneading troughs to ferment the yeast.
This takes about three hours, and it allows the dough to rise.
We have another pallet on the shipping dock.
Hello? Hey.
Hey.
Uh, you okay? I'm fine.
I was just, um, reading.
Let's get out of the house tonight.
What do you say? I gonna take you out for dinner.
How about, uh, how about some Chinese? I don't know.
I'm I'm kind of tired.
In the room again, aren't you? I was just making up the bed.
I washed the sheets spring cleaning and whatnot.
Damn it, Carol, how many times do we have to go through this? I found "Spaghetti on the Moon.
" Remember it? You used to read it to her.
Yeah, I remember.
Honey, please.
This is this is not healthy.
Mr.
Haplin, line seven.
Mr.
Haplin, line seven.
Hey.
What are you doing here? Hey.
Something I was hoping I'd go my whole career without having to do notifying next of kin.
What? What happened? We'll talk about it at home, okay? Okay.
Donna Friddle? Yeah? We're here about your husband.
He was found dead this morning at Mac's pond.
We we believe he was murdered.
We're we're sorry.
If there's anything that we that we can do, - please just - Don't hesitate to No! No! No! No! No! No! Coming here to to tell me that! No! No! - No! No! - Okay.
Okay, kids.
Let us see if we can't get a nibble of some hot, fresh rolls straight out of the oven, okay? He was totally killed in Raymond meadows' ice shack.
- The one on Mac's? - Yeah.
I can't picture him Jerry Friddle.
The skulker? Remember they fired him 'cause he would hide behind the stacks - and stare at the women and the girls? - That guy the skinny guy.
Yeah, he was so the creep.
But still, he didn't deserve this.
Hey, fellas, look who it is.
Straight from the government- subsidized subdivision known as Cook's Ridge.
Where cockroaches go to die.
- Why don't you just don't even.
- Can't you see, Lani? Being mean to girls is how these clunks hide the fact that they are deep in the throes of homosexual panic.
How's your dad, Georgia? He still cookin' the meth? 'Cause, you know, we saw him last night on truck trail 2 singing at the top of his tweaked lungs that old song "You're so vain", except he changed the words.
Let's go, Lanie.
In my veins, mm, I think I'll shoot some meth in my forearm.
In my veins In my veins I think I'll shoot some meth in my forearm.
Ooh What the hell happened to you? Donna Friddle.
She had a strong reaction to the news of her husband's demise.
I didn't realize you meant it literally when you said, "keep your powder dry".
Yeah.
Well, she's in room one if you need her.
- Whoa, whoa.
Who is? - Donna Friddle.
You brought her here? Well, yeah.
Yeah.
She's not a suspect.
We give her the news, and then we question her in her home after she's had time to properly process things.
Ohh.
So we should take her home.
Bring her to the break room.
You got it.
What? Hey, T.
C.
What's going on? It's a whole magungle.
W-what are you doing here? I thought we were putting the "Dallas Alice" - in the water today.
- God, it's not a good time.
Look, there's there's been a murder.
- A murder? - Yeah.
Who got murdered? I can't talk about it now.
I'll just call you later, okay? Uh, I'm sorry.
Okay.
You think that was gilding the Lily a little bit, dude? My dad? I think we need some ground rules.
My father is off-limits.
So is my taste in music and my ass.
But your ass is beautiful.
Exactly why it's off-limits.
So what am I gonna do about the ice shack? I don't know.
What do you want to do? Um, you didn't actually see anything, right? How are you gonna explain being out by Mac's pond past midnight in the freezing cold? I could tell the truth that I was in a parked car snogging the once and future prince of Happy Town.
His grandma runs the town.
My grandma danced with the money they throw.
His father owns the bread factory.
My father owns a meth lab.
Oh, and his father - and my father, they hate each other's guts.
- Yeah, that's a great way to guarantee I'm never allowed - out of the house again.
- I'm just so over this whole Romeo and Juliet thing.
It's not gonna be like this forever.
Right.
Eventually, a meteor will hit planet Earth, wiping out humanity as we know it, - and then you and I can hold hands in public.
- I love you so much.
Sometimes I don't even know what day it is.
It's "grow a pair" day.
My Jerry was persecuted here always, on account of he liked to look at the girls.
It didn't bother me none.
He was a looker.
He looked.
He didn't touch.
But he made folks uncomfortable.
Looking isn't skulking.
Looking isn't touching.
But in this town, if you pay attention to folks who aren't necessarily your friends, well, then, You gotta be "Magic Man" material, don't ya? Because remember what they used to say back when that was happening one thing you can count on The "Magic Man", he's someone you passed by on the street today.
All you have to do is start with those Stiviletto brothers.
They never left my Jerry alone.
They picked on him every chance they had.
And at what point did Chloe contact you? Huh? Did you realize the glow from her mouth - was the silvery moon? - What the hell is he talkin' about? Pop.
Griff? Pop.
Which Stiviletto brother in particular? Every time! Hey, you need to get Shut up, dogs! Shut up! You know, every damn time it is hard to soar with the eagles, dog-bird, when you're flying with turkeys.
Hey, look.
It's Sheriff Andy Taylor and his boy Opie come a-callin'.
What you boys doing? What? This? This is our contribution to the annual thaw fest.
For 50 cents, you get 3 chances to "dunk the dimwit.
" There's our dimwit.
Ain't particularly nice.
It also ain't particularly anywhere near your business.
Why don't you settle down, Lincoln? Don't even fake that you're a hard guy, T.
C.
If your old man weren't the sheriff, you'd be workin' for us at the dump shootin' rats.
Yeah, that's if you knew how to fire a gun.
Where were you boys last night? Well, that's easy-peasy, Sheriff.
We were here all night, except, of course, when Linc went into town to get us some pizza from Big Dave's.
And then he come back, and then me and Lincoln worked Shut up, dog! Shut up! Then me and Linc worked on the dimwit dunker, and baby boy watched himself a little reality television.
Then my girlfriend Kissy came over, and I made sweet love to her while she read a movie magazine.
You got a problem with Jerry Friddle? No, he's okay, you know, except for his around town pervin', of course.
Chloe know you're here? Who's that? Pop.
Pop.
Pop.
W-watch this, Conroy men.
Watch me.
Go, go, go! Don't leave town.
We never leave town, Sheriff.
Never.
Womper stinks.
Hey, T.
C.
! Come on, Womper! Sure you don't want to stick around? Have a beer? Talk old times? Come on, Womper! All the bad stuff you used to do that your pops doesn't know about? - So you have a nice day, gentlemen.
- Boo! Yeah! Henley! Henley! Hi, hon! Hi.
Absurdly cheery here, isn't it? Hello.
Come in, please.
I'm so happy you found us.
Compulsion to buy the remnants of cultural signposts from a flicking history is not exactly high on the list of priorities in Haplin county, but to an outsider From Snoqualmie, Washington.
Visiting for reasons related to Uh, the passing of a loved one.
And, um, looking to find Uh comfort in breathing new air.
And also to Use my inheritance to open a candle shop.
Paraffin or tallow? Soy wax.
Merritt Grieves, room 2B.
Henley Boone, 2F.
So you've got the ladies in the boarding house in quite a dither.
Yes, well, that is the burden of being eternally dashing.
So, no offense, and really, what do I know about anything, but we're in the middle of the tundra, and this place would struggle in Berkeley.
I mean, do you really think this was the prime plot to peddle memorabilia that, unless I'm missing something, uniformly predates the 1950s? Opening the minds of these fricky-frack townsfolk to the wonders of early cinema.
And if I can deliver one convert to the tick of time, then my investment will have been well-placed, as I remember the overwhelming sensation that I experienced when my dear mother exposed me to the wonders of live action.
"The Blue Door", made by a young auteur in Berlin in 1923.
This film, seen by very few, revealed to me the secrets of the universe.
The blue door was a gateway, a portal into the heart of man.
There's dread everywhere, even in the sunniest plains, but Haplin county has lived under the false comfort of its sheriff, who has managed to keep the dread at bay the last run of years.
The "Magic Man".
Hmm.
So the uninitiated has been slightly initiated.
One hears things.
Why do they call him the "Magic Man"? Because he had an ability to make people disappear so completely that bordered on the mystical.
It began 12 years ago.
An 18-year-old girl goes missing.
Every year, for the next seven years, someone vanishes, a personal possession they're carrying at the time a backpack, a toy, a paperback novel the only thing left at the scene of the abduction.
And then five years ago, it ended with a child.
But why? Did he move away? Did he lose interest? Was he jailed for another crime altogether? Or did he die? Or did he simply slip away ever-so quietly, back through the blue door? Now I think we let the Stivilettos stew in their own filth for a couple of days, get cozy with the thought of being off our radar, and then we use that time to load the cannons for when they slip.
- 'Cause they will slip.
- Sounds great, boss.
Police.
Lab's on 3, Roger.
Hobbs.
Where on the body? Well, why didn't you say so then? If it could be baking flour, it is baking flour.
It rains baking flour around here.
We're all covered in it.
All right.
Well, have the lab run the test anyway.
All right.
Thanks.
Believe these dopes? Friddle's body tested positive for high traces of baking flour.
Since I moved here, the back of my balls would test positive for high traces of baking flour.
Miss Boone? You said you'd be joining us for supper.
The soup is fresh cabbage.
Thank you.
What do you say, pop? Hello there, son.
You feeling all right? Oh, my knees are creakin'.
What else is new? Yeah.
Hey, um Who's Chloe? Chloe? Yeah, uh, who is she? Don't know any Chloe.
Pretty name, though, isn't it? Right.
Pop, why don't we make an appointment with doc Pete? You know, just have him check under the hood? I'm fine.
Well, you talk about forgetting the past, yet you still wear your wedding ring.
Ma's been gone years now.
The sense of touch is the most unappreciated of the five senses.
As long as this ring is on my finger, it's as if I'm still holding Alice's hand.
Hey, chin to the moon, son.
This was a dark day for Haplin.
We've had a 5-year run of keeping that darkness from the township.
No, you did.
Well, however you slice it, for five years, there were no major felonies, no "Magic Man" and no murders until this morning.
We will get it back the good yesterday.
Take station with that.
Hugs to the girls, huh? All right.
So just go ahead and eat.
- I'm sorry I'm late, everyone.
- Oh.
Hello.
Ah, this looks delicious.
Mm-hmm.
I hope it's still warm.
A woman traveling alone, they say, is either running from a man or to a man.
- Which is it for you, dear? - Rose.
What? Girl talk.
Right, Henley? Right.
It's okay.
Uh, and the answer is, uh, not to or from.
There's no man on either side of my travels.
Aw.
Well, it's lovely here, and don't let this trouble at the pond make you think otherwise.
What trouble at the pond? Murder.
The town weirdo, an awful man.
Now I'm not saying that he deserved to die and in my late husband's ice fishing shack, no less but he angered a lot of people around here with his shifty eyes and perverted ways.
- Gorgonzola on your soup? - No, thank you.
Here he comes.
Good evening, ladies.
Good evening.
Feeling any better? Unfortunately, no, but I'm hoping the night air will bring a fix.
I'll leave some preserves on your nightstand on a slice of toast.
That and some warm ginger ale always does the trick.
Thank you, Rose.
Mm.
Hmm.
Ladies.
Good night.
Good night.
Ahh.
You trollop! I will make no apologies.
In fact, I just may just be - lying on that slice of toast on his nightstand.
- Oh, you! Soup is getting cold, ladies.
Soup is getting cold.
Good meatballs today.
I'll be the judge of that.
Oh, you know what, Sheriff? Jerry Friddle used to come in here.
I didn't mind him.
I know people thought he was strange, but, uh, you know, he could name every viking player by position since the franchise started in 1960.
Is that so? Yeah.
Then maybe Roger Staubach killed him.
Come on.
Pizza Barn.
Big Dave speaking.
Yeah.
Two? Okay.
No problem.
What's the address? I thought that after our talk last week, we had an agreement.
What are you still doing in my county? Oh, my goodness.
Did you really just utter a version of "This town ain't big enough for the both of us"? How splendid.
A man can go his entire life without hearing a sheriff say those words to him.
It appears you've dropped something.
Your wedding band? Good evening, Sheriff.
Oh, I saw Miranda Kirby at the produce counter today.
She said they're expecting the biggest turnout yet - at thaw fest.
Won't that be fun, cookie? - I'm gonna wear my purple dress.
I can't believe they're even going ahead with it, - considering - Considering what? Considering that the weather hasn't broken yet.
Is that what you mean, Georgia? Right.
A thaw fest with no thaw it's like Thanksgiving with no thanks.
Someone got killded.
Where did you hear that? Angela Ferelli told me.
She said someone got killded on the pond where we skate.
It's true, Emma C.
Somebody did die today.
But we talked about this, remember? Eventually, everybody goes up to heaven, just like Grammy Alice did.
Did Grammy Alice get killded? No, no, no, sweetie.
Grammy Alice was very tired and People die in different ways.
The man on the pond died because someone bad hurt him.
But most people die just like Grammy Alice.
Okay, honey? - Okay? - Okay.
Okay? All right, now you eat up.
I was only telling her the truth.
If we don't, she'll be a pod.
She'll be a kid.
The more you shield her from these things, Tommy, the less she'll be equipped to face them, to protect herself from them.
Well, excuse me for trying to prolong the innocence of our daughter's childhood for as long as we can.
Okay, count.
One, two, three, four, five.
All right, what's next? "Hey, Emma.
Guess what.
Macaroni and cheese is bad for you, and Jerry Garcia's dead.
" Yeah.
- No! Get her off! - We were turning over the Stiviletto file - when he came in.
- Yeah, he blows right past us like we're not even there.
He's outside of himself, Tom.
This ain't him.
Pop.
Open the door, pop.
Pop? Griff, open the door.
If you touch the baby Jesus, I will you make you wear the costume! Open the door, pop.
Pop, look at me.
What are you doing? Ch-Chloe burnt the can.
Pop - Who? - She burnt the can.
What? So I'm here.
Ma, I'm gonna go up now.
It's uh, 12:30 my time.
I'll call you if I find anything.
Hello? Oh, you're there.
It's me Chloe.
- Pop, look at me.
- Now that blood has been spilled again, everything will unravel.
- Pop, look at me.
- He'll be back.
- Pop, look at me.
- Sheriff? He's only born in the instant flash Pop.
Pop, open the door.
- of man's capacity for evil - Sheriff? And he'll thrive in the shadows.
- Pop.
Pop, look at me.
Pop, open the damn door! - So that wickedness - Look at me, please.
- is vanquished.
Pop! Pop! You can't stop him.
We never could.
Pop.
Pop, look at me, please.
We never could.
Pop! Pop, no.
Pop! - Get this door open! - Pop.
- Pop, open the damn door! - You can't stop him.
You can't stop him.
What are you talking about? Pop! He's a Magic Man.
Pop, no.
Pop.
Pop, look at me! Open the door! - He's a Magic Man.
- Open the door! No! Now that blood has been spilled, he'll be back.
He's a Magic Man.
Red dogs under illegal legs.
She looks so good Maybe one of these days you'll actually be able to drop me off in front of my house.
She is watching the detectives.
"Ooh, he's so cute!" Night.
She is watching the detectives when they shoot, shoot, shoot, shoot.
Help! Someone out there, help! I don't know I don't know what you're talking about! I don't know! You've gotta be kidding me, dude.
Aah! I don't know what you're talking about, man! You got the wrong guy! I don't know what you're talking about! Okay, okay, okay! Okay! I'll tell you what you need to know.
Just get that gun out of my face, okay? Okay.
Okay, okay, okay.
I'll tell you what you want.
Just get the gun out of my face.
Are we good? Uh, I figured you'd let me go, you know? Let the proper authorities do to me what they have to, you know? Court, prison, and may Oh, come on! I told you what you want to know! I told you what you want to hear! Wait! I told you what you needed to know! Oh, please! I told you what you needed to know! Find your baggage on the platform.
- It's Henley, isn't it? - Yeah.
Hi.
- I'm Miranda Kirby.
Oh! What fun.
- Thank you so much for getting me.
Full-service Realtor.
That's what they call me.
Welcome to Haplin.
You're gonna love it here.
- Do you play the guitar? - I do, yeah.
Oh! I have always wanted to play.
- You know, I took lessons when I was about 9 - Thank you.
But I didn't like my teacher 'cause he smelled.
So I asked my parents if I could quit, and they let me! I have half a mind to sue them now, honest.
Can you imagine if they didn't make me quit? I'd be flippin' Eric Clapton today.
My Jordan she's 8.
She's gonna start playing in the summer.
And if she wants to quit, it's like, - Sorry, partner! No can doofus! Get in! - Right, okay.
So why have you chosen Haplin, hon? Aside from wanting to display impeccable geographic taste.
- Uh, well, my mother vacationed here as a child.
- Okay.
Yeah.
She recently passed away, - but she always spoke so fondly of this place.
- Oh.
Do doodly do! - Do do doodly do, ah! - Your dad's singing his "do do" song, and that can only mean one thing.
That's right "Dallas Alice" goes back in the lake today.
- It gets earlier every year.
- No, that's not true.
The week of the thaw fest is when we always put her back in.
It's gonna be a chilly thaw fest this year.
- Doesn't seem like it's warming up anytime soon.
- Mm, mm, mm.
- Oh, did you look at those brochures? - Uh, no.
Emma C.
, mommy wants to leave Haplin and move to California.
What say you? I say no.
- Yeah? - Yeah.
- Why not? - They have earthcakes there.
They do have earthcakes there.
And here we are, in the cradle of the Heartland.
Daddy's the son of the sheriff in a town with no crime.
Mommy has an important job at the bread factory, and daughter Emma is the brightest bulb in her first grade class.
Eat 'em.
Mommy and daddy still sneak off for smoochy-smooch, despite the fact that they've been together since prom.
So tell me, Emma.
Why would we trade any of that - to go to a place full of earthcakes? - We wouldn't.
No, we wouldn't.
Tell her, Emma C.
Tell mommy the glories of Haplin, hmm? What do you plan to do? I want to open a candle shop with my inheritance.
- What do you think? - I think that's amazing.
I adore candles, - especially the scented ones.
- Oh, you'll love my, uh, - strawberry fields glow-ever candle.
- Oh, yeah? Mm-hmm.
I use sweet, sun-ripened strawberries - in the wax - Oh! - And then hand-grubby the top with banana slice wicks.
- Ooh! - The aroma is amazing.
- Okay.
Put me down for five.
Um, speaking of aroma, everything smells so good here.
Well, of course it does, sweetie.
Look.
That's the bread factory "Our Daily" baking and confectioner.
The locals call it "The Bready.
" Not only does it employ 12% of Haplin's residents, it also makes Haplin a place where the air is alive with the aroma of fresh baking bread all the live-long day.
Don't you ever ask them why, if they told you, you would cry, so just look at them and sigh, and know they love you.
Welcome to Haplin, or as some folks like to call it Happy Town.
Because they know, Henley.
They know.
I think it's too cold.
Well, now that's where you're wrong.
Yeah, it's too cold, but if you think on it, wish on it, visualize the "Dallas Alice" on lake spears, huh? - Are you seeing it? - No.
No? Huh? Are you are you seeing the string with the trout - and the sauger and the walleye dangling from it, huh? - No.
- No? Are you visualizing anything? - Grilled cheese! Grilled cheese? What? Mwah.
Okay.
I'll prove to you that it works.
Right now I am envisioning your babysitter Georgia, who's come to walk you to school.
Ohm Oh, my God! It works.
I can't believe it! It works! It works! - What are you guys doing? - Daddy's being dumb.
Daddies do that.
Are you really putting her in the water today? - Yeah.
- The pond is frozen over.
I was by there last night.
Well, the pond isn't the lake, and what were you doing by the pond last night, Georgia? Saved by the belly.
Hey there, little bean! - Grandpa! - Oh! That's my girl.
Oh, look at you.
Georgia, how's your father? Sleeping one off.
- Ain't that much sleep in creation.
- Truth.
We got a situation at the square.
- Want to ride along? - It's my day off, pops.
I'm putting the "Dallas Alice" back in the water today.
It's too damn early in the season - to put her back in the water.
- Was there some sort of meeting? What, you guys got together this morning - to talk about the weather? - Come on, let's go.
- Let me get my khakis.
- No, you're fine just like you are.
- See you later, huh, little bean? Georgia.
- Tell mommy I had to leave 'cause my daddy is meaner than your daddy.
Mmm! Come on.
Let's go.
You drive.
- Bye, guys.
- Come on.
Technically, it is not a date.
I never framed it as a date.
The minute you ask a girl out, Big Dave, it's a date.
I asked her out for omelets.
White wine and omelets.
This is Big Dave's, and this is Big Dave.
Hi! Good morning.
This is Henley.
Henley, this is Big Dave.
- Hi.
- Hi.
- And this is Eli Rogers.
- Hey.
They call him "Root Beer.
" It's a small town.
Everyone gets a nickname.
Nice to meet you guys.
Ah, yeah.
Welcome.
Yeah.
Definitely.
Um, why don't you ladies take a booth, and I will bring you over a cup of coffee? - Okay.
- Great.
Bye.
Are you thinking what I'm thinking? White wine and omelets? Yeah.
Yeah.
Okay.
Yeah, I'm on it.
I'm on it.
I gotta go.
Trouble in the square banner trouble.
Ohh.
Again? Lay off that horn! You, in the car.
Would you lay off the horn? Settle down.
- Everybody, settle down.
- Why don't you use a little more bass in your voice, Root Beer? - Say it like a man.
It'll be more effective.
- Yeah! Yeah! Whoa.
Look at this A fracas.
An imbroglio a mob scene in downtown Haplin.
That's a rare occurrence, John.
Well, these men seem to have a problem with us raising our banner.
I thought we agreed that it wasn't to be hoisted.
- No, we agreed to nothing of the sort.
- Yeah, sure we did.
We sat at that city council meeting, and the talk was of healing, of not dwelling in the past, and we agreed then and there this wasn't to be hoisted.
Which I would imagine would be very easy if your own flesh and blood was not pictured up on that banner.
So as long as they remain missing, - then there's still hope I guess, right? - No doubt.
I-I'm not trying to be insensitive As long as you refuse to hunt for the "Magic Man", then he'll just remain at large.
Providing there really was a "Magic Man".
Providing there's not some other explanation.
What then? They all just skipped town, huh? - My 8-year-old daughter did not just skip town.
- I know that.
- Maybe you'd like to take this up with my mother.
- Maybe I would.
That's it! Hey! - Jeez! All right! - Get him away! - Enough! That is enough! - Damn it.
The banner goes away.
Thaw fest is about corn dogs and carousels.
It ain't about darkness.
Hey, Sheriff.
Hobbs has got something serious out at Mac's pond.
The banner goes away! How's your jaw? It's fine.
You need to start acting like a cop, Tommy.
How do you figure? You're standing there with your hands in your back pockets instead of blading them properly.
Command presence.
You act like you're selling ice cream.
This is Haplin, pop.
Why make things difficult when life is offering you this? Just remember the inevitability of the vis major.
The what? The vis major.
It's a Latin term.
It means the natural and unavoidable catastrophe that interrupts the natural course of events.
And, son, every life can expect a visit from the vis major.
Well, I figure the trick is to avoid the major vis or the vis major or whatever the hell it is - for as long as possible.
- That is the trick.
I'd tell that to Chloe if ever I saw her again.
- Who? - What? Who's Chloe? Who? What you got, Hobbs? Kids were skatin' when they found him.
You're not gonna believe this.
Know what that is, Tommy? Yep.
The vis major.
Okay.
I really think you're gonna be very comfortable here till we can find you something a little more permanent, huh? Yeah, sounds good.
I have seven boarders at this time, Henley, including you and me.
Now here is the TV room, and the only rule here is "the first to arrive gets to drive".
Breakfast and lunch are come-as-you-may.
And these are my widows Esther, Joanie, Rose and Irene.
- This is Henley.
- Hello.
Well, look at you! Cuter than a mouse's pocketbook! I looked like that when I was her age.
- No, you didn't.
- I have the photo.
They didn't have cameras in the 1400s.
Everybody says there's no homier place than Dot Meadows' place.
Mr.
Grieves? Mrs.
Meadows.
Will you be joining us for dinner? We're serving lamb, mint-rubbed.
Regrettably no, Mrs.
Meadows.
My stomach is a little sour.
Has been all day.
Oh, dear.
I'll send Colleen up with some bicarbonate of soda.
How kind.
Mr.
Grieves moved here three months ago.
He's opening a shop in town movie memorabilia.
The third floor is strictly off-limits.
Failure to adhere to these rules will result in the immediate termination of your stay here.
I'm not joking.
Your room is this way.
We have a late-model red pickup overturned Okay, everybody.
By now you've all heard.
And while I know this is something we haven't had to deal with in a while for most of you, never at all we will get this taken care of so long as we keep our powder dry.
Now the brutal specificity of the murder should be kept quiet so as to help in the investigation.
We gotta get this guy, quick.
This is not a well man.
A well man does not put a hole in another man's head.
Okay, people.
You heard the man.
Let's get out there.
I want you to canvass all the houses around Mac's pond, and I want you to find anybody who might have seen the victim in the hours before he died, all right? Let's get on it.
Sheriff, State Police Barracks - are sending a car over for the body.
- They're not even gonna give us 11 seconds with it? Captain Frost's orders, Detective Hobbs.
And it sounded like they're sending a man out.
For what? To assist us, I'm sure.
"Assist," which quickly turns "monitor", and before you know it, it's "supervise".
And Peggy Haplin office left six messages before the great lady called herself.
Oh, yeah? How'd she sound? Well, like she'd been eatin' hornets for breakfast.
Root Beer.
Tommy.
Notify Mrs.
Friddle.
Line one.
So here we see the containers where the water, flour, salt, fat and yeast are all mixed.
The mix is then placed into the kneading troughs to ferment the yeast.
This takes about three hours, and it allows the dough to rise.
We have another pallet on the shipping dock.
Hello? Hey.
Hey.
Uh, you okay? I'm fine.
I was just, um, reading.
Let's get out of the house tonight.
What do you say? I gonna take you out for dinner.
How about, uh, how about some Chinese? I don't know.
I'm I'm kind of tired.
In the room again, aren't you? I was just making up the bed.
I washed the sheets spring cleaning and whatnot.
Damn it, Carol, how many times do we have to go through this? I found "Spaghetti on the Moon.
" Remember it? You used to read it to her.
Yeah, I remember.
Honey, please.
This is this is not healthy.
Mr.
Haplin, line seven.
Mr.
Haplin, line seven.
Hey.
What are you doing here? Hey.
Something I was hoping I'd go my whole career without having to do notifying next of kin.
What? What happened? We'll talk about it at home, okay? Okay.
Donna Friddle? Yeah? We're here about your husband.
He was found dead this morning at Mac's pond.
We we believe he was murdered.
We're we're sorry.
If there's anything that we that we can do, - please just - Don't hesitate to No! No! No! No! No! No! Coming here to to tell me that! No! No! - No! No! - Okay.
Okay, kids.
Let us see if we can't get a nibble of some hot, fresh rolls straight out of the oven, okay? He was totally killed in Raymond meadows' ice shack.
- The one on Mac's? - Yeah.
I can't picture him Jerry Friddle.
The skulker? Remember they fired him 'cause he would hide behind the stacks - and stare at the women and the girls? - That guy the skinny guy.
Yeah, he was so the creep.
But still, he didn't deserve this.
Hey, fellas, look who it is.
Straight from the government- subsidized subdivision known as Cook's Ridge.
Where cockroaches go to die.
- Why don't you just don't even.
- Can't you see, Lani? Being mean to girls is how these clunks hide the fact that they are deep in the throes of homosexual panic.
How's your dad, Georgia? He still cookin' the meth? 'Cause, you know, we saw him last night on truck trail 2 singing at the top of his tweaked lungs that old song "You're so vain", except he changed the words.
Let's go, Lanie.
In my veins, mm, I think I'll shoot some meth in my forearm.
In my veins In my veins I think I'll shoot some meth in my forearm.
Ooh What the hell happened to you? Donna Friddle.
She had a strong reaction to the news of her husband's demise.
I didn't realize you meant it literally when you said, "keep your powder dry".
Yeah.
Well, she's in room one if you need her.
- Whoa, whoa.
Who is? - Donna Friddle.
You brought her here? Well, yeah.
Yeah.
She's not a suspect.
We give her the news, and then we question her in her home after she's had time to properly process things.
Ohh.
So we should take her home.
Bring her to the break room.
You got it.
What? Hey, T.
C.
What's going on? It's a whole magungle.
W-what are you doing here? I thought we were putting the "Dallas Alice" - in the water today.
- God, it's not a good time.
Look, there's there's been a murder.
- A murder? - Yeah.
Who got murdered? I can't talk about it now.
I'll just call you later, okay? Uh, I'm sorry.
Okay.
You think that was gilding the Lily a little bit, dude? My dad? I think we need some ground rules.
My father is off-limits.
So is my taste in music and my ass.
But your ass is beautiful.
Exactly why it's off-limits.
So what am I gonna do about the ice shack? I don't know.
What do you want to do? Um, you didn't actually see anything, right? How are you gonna explain being out by Mac's pond past midnight in the freezing cold? I could tell the truth that I was in a parked car snogging the once and future prince of Happy Town.
His grandma runs the town.
My grandma danced with the money they throw.
His father owns the bread factory.
My father owns a meth lab.
Oh, and his father - and my father, they hate each other's guts.
- Yeah, that's a great way to guarantee I'm never allowed - out of the house again.
- I'm just so over this whole Romeo and Juliet thing.
It's not gonna be like this forever.
Right.
Eventually, a meteor will hit planet Earth, wiping out humanity as we know it, - and then you and I can hold hands in public.
- I love you so much.
Sometimes I don't even know what day it is.
It's "grow a pair" day.
My Jerry was persecuted here always, on account of he liked to look at the girls.
It didn't bother me none.
He was a looker.
He looked.
He didn't touch.
But he made folks uncomfortable.
Looking isn't skulking.
Looking isn't touching.
But in this town, if you pay attention to folks who aren't necessarily your friends, well, then, You gotta be "Magic Man" material, don't ya? Because remember what they used to say back when that was happening one thing you can count on The "Magic Man", he's someone you passed by on the street today.
All you have to do is start with those Stiviletto brothers.
They never left my Jerry alone.
They picked on him every chance they had.
And at what point did Chloe contact you? Huh? Did you realize the glow from her mouth - was the silvery moon? - What the hell is he talkin' about? Pop.
Griff? Pop.
Which Stiviletto brother in particular? Every time! Hey, you need to get Shut up, dogs! Shut up! You know, every damn time it is hard to soar with the eagles, dog-bird, when you're flying with turkeys.
Hey, look.
It's Sheriff Andy Taylor and his boy Opie come a-callin'.
What you boys doing? What? This? This is our contribution to the annual thaw fest.
For 50 cents, you get 3 chances to "dunk the dimwit.
" There's our dimwit.
Ain't particularly nice.
It also ain't particularly anywhere near your business.
Why don't you settle down, Lincoln? Don't even fake that you're a hard guy, T.
C.
If your old man weren't the sheriff, you'd be workin' for us at the dump shootin' rats.
Yeah, that's if you knew how to fire a gun.
Where were you boys last night? Well, that's easy-peasy, Sheriff.
We were here all night, except, of course, when Linc went into town to get us some pizza from Big Dave's.
And then he come back, and then me and Lincoln worked Shut up, dog! Shut up! Then me and Linc worked on the dimwit dunker, and baby boy watched himself a little reality television.
Then my girlfriend Kissy came over, and I made sweet love to her while she read a movie magazine.
You got a problem with Jerry Friddle? No, he's okay, you know, except for his around town pervin', of course.
Chloe know you're here? Who's that? Pop.
Pop.
Pop.
W-watch this, Conroy men.
Watch me.
Go, go, go! Don't leave town.
We never leave town, Sheriff.
Never.
Womper stinks.
Hey, T.
C.
! Come on, Womper! Sure you don't want to stick around? Have a beer? Talk old times? Come on, Womper! All the bad stuff you used to do that your pops doesn't know about? - So you have a nice day, gentlemen.
- Boo! Yeah! Henley! Henley! Hi, hon! Hi.
Absurdly cheery here, isn't it? Hello.
Come in, please.
I'm so happy you found us.
Compulsion to buy the remnants of cultural signposts from a flicking history is not exactly high on the list of priorities in Haplin county, but to an outsider From Snoqualmie, Washington.
Visiting for reasons related to Uh, the passing of a loved one.
And, um, looking to find Uh comfort in breathing new air.
And also to Use my inheritance to open a candle shop.
Paraffin or tallow? Soy wax.
Merritt Grieves, room 2B.
Henley Boone, 2F.
So you've got the ladies in the boarding house in quite a dither.
Yes, well, that is the burden of being eternally dashing.
So, no offense, and really, what do I know about anything, but we're in the middle of the tundra, and this place would struggle in Berkeley.
I mean, do you really think this was the prime plot to peddle memorabilia that, unless I'm missing something, uniformly predates the 1950s? Opening the minds of these fricky-frack townsfolk to the wonders of early cinema.
And if I can deliver one convert to the tick of time, then my investment will have been well-placed, as I remember the overwhelming sensation that I experienced when my dear mother exposed me to the wonders of live action.
"The Blue Door", made by a young auteur in Berlin in 1923.
This film, seen by very few, revealed to me the secrets of the universe.
The blue door was a gateway, a portal into the heart of man.
There's dread everywhere, even in the sunniest plains, but Haplin county has lived under the false comfort of its sheriff, who has managed to keep the dread at bay the last run of years.
The "Magic Man".
Hmm.
So the uninitiated has been slightly initiated.
One hears things.
Why do they call him the "Magic Man"? Because he had an ability to make people disappear so completely that bordered on the mystical.
It began 12 years ago.
An 18-year-old girl goes missing.
Every year, for the next seven years, someone vanishes, a personal possession they're carrying at the time a backpack, a toy, a paperback novel the only thing left at the scene of the abduction.
And then five years ago, it ended with a child.
But why? Did he move away? Did he lose interest? Was he jailed for another crime altogether? Or did he die? Or did he simply slip away ever-so quietly, back through the blue door? Now I think we let the Stivilettos stew in their own filth for a couple of days, get cozy with the thought of being off our radar, and then we use that time to load the cannons for when they slip.
- 'Cause they will slip.
- Sounds great, boss.
Police.
Lab's on 3, Roger.
Hobbs.
Where on the body? Well, why didn't you say so then? If it could be baking flour, it is baking flour.
It rains baking flour around here.
We're all covered in it.
All right.
Well, have the lab run the test anyway.
All right.
Thanks.
Believe these dopes? Friddle's body tested positive for high traces of baking flour.
Since I moved here, the back of my balls would test positive for high traces of baking flour.
Miss Boone? You said you'd be joining us for supper.
The soup is fresh cabbage.
Thank you.
What do you say, pop? Hello there, son.
You feeling all right? Oh, my knees are creakin'.
What else is new? Yeah.
Hey, um Who's Chloe? Chloe? Yeah, uh, who is she? Don't know any Chloe.
Pretty name, though, isn't it? Right.
Pop, why don't we make an appointment with doc Pete? You know, just have him check under the hood? I'm fine.
Well, you talk about forgetting the past, yet you still wear your wedding ring.
Ma's been gone years now.
The sense of touch is the most unappreciated of the five senses.
As long as this ring is on my finger, it's as if I'm still holding Alice's hand.
Hey, chin to the moon, son.
This was a dark day for Haplin.
We've had a 5-year run of keeping that darkness from the township.
No, you did.
Well, however you slice it, for five years, there were no major felonies, no "Magic Man" and no murders until this morning.
We will get it back the good yesterday.
Take station with that.
Hugs to the girls, huh? All right.
So just go ahead and eat.
- I'm sorry I'm late, everyone.
- Oh.
Hello.
Ah, this looks delicious.
Mm-hmm.
I hope it's still warm.
A woman traveling alone, they say, is either running from a man or to a man.
- Which is it for you, dear? - Rose.
What? Girl talk.
Right, Henley? Right.
It's okay.
Uh, and the answer is, uh, not to or from.
There's no man on either side of my travels.
Aw.
Well, it's lovely here, and don't let this trouble at the pond make you think otherwise.
What trouble at the pond? Murder.
The town weirdo, an awful man.
Now I'm not saying that he deserved to die and in my late husband's ice fishing shack, no less but he angered a lot of people around here with his shifty eyes and perverted ways.
- Gorgonzola on your soup? - No, thank you.
Here he comes.
Good evening, ladies.
Good evening.
Feeling any better? Unfortunately, no, but I'm hoping the night air will bring a fix.
I'll leave some preserves on your nightstand on a slice of toast.
That and some warm ginger ale always does the trick.
Thank you, Rose.
Mm.
Hmm.
Ladies.
Good night.
Good night.
Ahh.
You trollop! I will make no apologies.
In fact, I just may just be - lying on that slice of toast on his nightstand.
- Oh, you! Soup is getting cold, ladies.
Soup is getting cold.
Good meatballs today.
I'll be the judge of that.
Oh, you know what, Sheriff? Jerry Friddle used to come in here.
I didn't mind him.
I know people thought he was strange, but, uh, you know, he could name every viking player by position since the franchise started in 1960.
Is that so? Yeah.
Then maybe Roger Staubach killed him.
Come on.
Pizza Barn.
Big Dave speaking.
Yeah.
Two? Okay.
No problem.
What's the address? I thought that after our talk last week, we had an agreement.
What are you still doing in my county? Oh, my goodness.
Did you really just utter a version of "This town ain't big enough for the both of us"? How splendid.
A man can go his entire life without hearing a sheriff say those words to him.
It appears you've dropped something.
Your wedding band? Good evening, Sheriff.
Oh, I saw Miranda Kirby at the produce counter today.
She said they're expecting the biggest turnout yet - at thaw fest.
Won't that be fun, cookie? - I'm gonna wear my purple dress.
I can't believe they're even going ahead with it, - considering - Considering what? Considering that the weather hasn't broken yet.
Is that what you mean, Georgia? Right.
A thaw fest with no thaw it's like Thanksgiving with no thanks.
Someone got killded.
Where did you hear that? Angela Ferelli told me.
She said someone got killded on the pond where we skate.
It's true, Emma C.
Somebody did die today.
But we talked about this, remember? Eventually, everybody goes up to heaven, just like Grammy Alice did.
Did Grammy Alice get killded? No, no, no, sweetie.
Grammy Alice was very tired and People die in different ways.
The man on the pond died because someone bad hurt him.
But most people die just like Grammy Alice.
Okay, honey? - Okay? - Okay.
Okay? All right, now you eat up.
I was only telling her the truth.
If we don't, she'll be a pod.
She'll be a kid.
The more you shield her from these things, Tommy, the less she'll be equipped to face them, to protect herself from them.
Well, excuse me for trying to prolong the innocence of our daughter's childhood for as long as we can.
Okay, count.
One, two, three, four, five.
All right, what's next? "Hey, Emma.
Guess what.
Macaroni and cheese is bad for you, and Jerry Garcia's dead.
" Yeah.
- No! Get her off! - We were turning over the Stiviletto file - when he came in.
- Yeah, he blows right past us like we're not even there.
He's outside of himself, Tom.
This ain't him.
Pop.
Open the door, pop.
Pop? Griff, open the door.
If you touch the baby Jesus, I will you make you wear the costume! Open the door, pop.
Pop, look at me.
What are you doing? Ch-Chloe burnt the can.
Pop - Who? - She burnt the can.
What? So I'm here.
Ma, I'm gonna go up now.
It's uh, 12:30 my time.
I'll call you if I find anything.
Hello? Oh, you're there.
It's me Chloe.
- Pop, look at me.
- Now that blood has been spilled again, everything will unravel.
- Pop, look at me.
- He'll be back.
- Pop, look at me.
- Sheriff? He's only born in the instant flash Pop.
Pop, open the door.
- of man's capacity for evil - Sheriff? And he'll thrive in the shadows.
- Pop.
Pop, look at me.
Pop, open the damn door! - So that wickedness - Look at me, please.
- is vanquished.
Pop! Pop! You can't stop him.
We never could.
Pop.
Pop, look at me, please.
We never could.
Pop! Pop, no.
Pop! - Get this door open! - Pop.
- Pop, open the damn door! - You can't stop him.
You can't stop him.
What are you talking about? Pop! He's a Magic Man.
Pop, no.
Pop.
Pop, look at me! Open the door! - He's a Magic Man.
- Open the door! No! Now that blood has been spilled, he'll be back.
He's a Magic Man.